Theo sits down with father/son auctioneer team, Cameron Whitehead and Bryan "Spanky" Nichols, to discuss how they became auctioneers, the dirty secrets of the trade and the craziest items they've ever sold off the lot. Plus, Theo calls a single mom to give her some much needed help.
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Today's episode brought to you by Liquid Death.
God, kill it.
Today's guests are, you know, they're those frontline tongue ninjas, baby.
You know what I'm saying?
I mean, these guys are, you know, they're the sensei of selling.
They're a father and son duo from San Marcos, Texas.
They work in a business that I know nothing about, but I'm very curious to learn.
Today's guests, we are very honored to have in studio.
It is Cameron and his father, Spanky Nichols, and they are auctioneers.
Shine that light on me.
I'll spin and tell you stories.
Shine on me.
And I will find a song I've been singing just before I'll find a song I've been singing just before Man, that was.
Nashville's a cool spot, man.
It's first time here.
Is it your first time here?
Yeah.
Yeah.
My first time, too.
Okay.
Very cool spot.
And you've been sober ever since?
No, I haven't been sober ever since.
I've had a couple relapses here and there.
Every day is a work in progress.
Yeah.
It really is, dude.
I'm grateful to have each new day, you know, and just try to have a good attitude when I get up.
Right.
If I can start out decent, I usually do pretty well.
Yeah.
It's when I start out recent.
So you don't want to go have a drink with me later?
Probably not, man.
I'll watch you drink, dude.
Hell, I'll buy you some steroids, dude.
We used to do a good bit of, you know, one of my buddies one night, I was doing some touring somewhere and he's like, it's like 3 a.m.
He's like, hey, man, I'm going to get some drugs, you know?
Give me some money.
And I was like, all right, you know, I'm not going out there to get them, but I'll, you know what I'm saying?
I'll be a part of it.
Fiscally, I'll be involved.
Yeah.
Right, right.
So I give him some money and then he comes back like two hours later, man.
He had steroids on him.
He's like, let's barter.
And he had injectable steroids, man.
I said, well, it takes two weeks to get in your system.
So even if we do them right now, we got to, you know what I'm saying?
I got to get a gym membership and then you and I got to meet back up in a couple weeks.
This wasn't a good idea.
So we decided not to do that.
Funny story, though.
I'm sitting here with Cam and Spanky and you guys are auctioneer men, right?
That is correct.
And is that a safe term?
What is the term to reference somebody that does auction?
Auctioneer.
That's it.
Yes, sir.
The old school term would be colonel.
Colonel.
Really?
In World War I, all the colonels, when they got done with all the equipment, they were the ones that sold the equipment.
So they labeled auctioneers as colonels.
Horses, too.
Oh, really?
They had to get them to listen to them, so they gave them the title colonel.
Just to get the men to listen to them.
They gave them the title colonel.
So then the men had to listen.
And so at the end of like a battle or something or a war or something, the colonel would auction off the gear?
I think so.
To my understanding, horses and gear?
Yeah.
So technically, we are colonels.
Okay.
And so.
I think technically.
And you guys, so Spanky, you got into it first.
Yes, sir.
Okay.
And so how did that occur?
How did you, how do you just, how does someone become an auctioneer?
It's really a family passed down trait.
I mean, it's tough to get into.
It's really, really tough to break into.
Like, like they'll tell you, 5% of every graduating auctioneer class, only 5% ever pursue it and make a living at doing it.
And is it because it's a family business?
Like, it's hard.
It's not necessarily a family business, but it's more so of with anything, it's who you know versus what you know.
Correct.
Yeah, and that's everything.
I mean, and even actually in, I know in Louisiana, there's a lot of barge captains and stuff like that.
And that business, tugboat captains.
Yeah.
And that is a familial business.
I mean, if your grandfather, you can literally get grandfathered into it.
Right.
You know, and that's, and they're always going to court over that, over trying to like adjust the way people can get into that.
So Spanky, take me into how you get into it.
So my father graduated Missouri Auction School in 1974.
Oh, wow.
And he's had auto auctions my whole life, owned auto auctions my whole life.
And so, I mean, I was working the ring, which they say the ring is the floor, taking bids.
Yep, yep, yep, yep.
The floor bidders.
Okay.
I mean, I was working the ring as young as 10, 11, 12 years old.
Okay.
And when you're in the ring, what is that?
So the ring is the floor where...
Okay.
Working the people that are attending the auction there, buying and bidding.
You're taking their bids and turning them into the auctioneer.
Auctioning.
Which is on a block.
At that time, would have been my dad.
I mean, we've done anything from tool sales to car sales.
Mainly, my dad has owned car auto auctions my whole life.
Wow.
So do you remember like, so as a ring person, were there some like, was that kind of, was that harder than being actually the big boss?
No, not at all.
You don't have to count.
You just have to count.
You don't have to count.
You just got to turn bids in.
I mean, yep, yep, yep, yep.
And every time you, yep, I mean, you're going up.
The auctioneer is going up 100 or whatever increments he's counting.
Okay, so what determines and what determines how you count?
Like how the auctioneer sets the, like the increments?
How fast the crowd is bidding.
Right.
And also there's a floor, so like there's a reserve.
So if you're like 10,000 bucks, you know, you count in 250s or 100s.
And if you're like in 200 or 300 bucks, it's 50s sometimes.
Okay.
Whatever the crowd will allow you to do.
Right.
Okay.
And What are some of the things as you're okay?
So, you get out of the ring and you end up becoming the auctioneer.
So, did you have to go to school for that?
And you went to Missouri.
Missouri Auction School.
The same one you went to, Ken?
Yes, sir.
Okay.
Same one my dad went to.
Okay.
And how many, like, is there like a, how big is it?
Is your, was your class?
I think there was like 50 of us for that year.
And is that pretty competitive?
I mean, that seems like a competitive, like, you just sharpening your tongue before class.
Like, it's.
Yeah, the business is the school.
You don't come out of auction school as an auctioneer.
No.
You come out of auction school with the ability to practice and learn to become an auctioneer.
Takes years after school.
Takes years after.
I will say that he, Cameron, has become the fastest auction, not just because of my son, but it comes natural to him.
I have to work a lot harder at it.
He's a lot more natural at it, really, than a lot of people I've ever seen.
And what makes him, what are some of those kind of natural abilities that make someone have an easier walk with auctioning?
Just breathing.
It just came real natural to him.
Breathing, he learned counting, and he's a real sharp guy on top of, aside from auctioneering.
And that's memory is a lot of auctioneering.
I mean, you got to stay on track with your numbers and not miss numbers.
And counting at that rapid speed, it takes a good memory.
And he has that.
What do you think?
Because I can almost relate to you, Derek, Panky, when you're saying, like, I don't know the pressure would max me out, dude.
You know what I'm saying?
I'd be on Delaud or something.
I'd be on, you know what I'm saying?
I'd be calling Big Pharma.
I would need, like, I think the pressure, like even just in the moment of the, like, you know, keeping the tablature in my head, worried I was going to upset people.
Well, there's, there's, there's a lot going on when you're up there auctioneering and selling cars at 30, 40 seconds every car.
I mean, you're, you're, you're, and nowadays with COVID, you know, you, you don't have a guy sitting over here talking to you necessarily, or sometimes you do, that's a luxury.
Sometimes he's in the computer, and so you're watching the computer, you're watching the crowd, you're watching another screen for online bidders.
So you're watching everything at the same time.
Wow.
And you're trying not to piss off eight or 10 people at one time and keep the whole entire crowd happy.
And I mean, there's a lot going on when you're up there.
Cam, what would you say is, is there a moment in the bidding, like in the bidding process, when what's the toughest moment for an auctioneer as the bidding really gets heightened out?
Or is it in the beginning?
It's in the beginning, finally.
Telling them some of the journey through when you start an item.
So the car rolls in or the item or whatever you're selling.
And who brings it in?
Is it women usually?
Yeah, usually.
No, it's just random people.
They just get these drivers in.
Oh, damn.
I feel like you put a bed, you know, you put a beautiful little bird.
A temporary blender, I'll buy it.
Yeah.
Oh, absolutely.
For sure, it will help.
I'll buy a used vacuum if she's not.
You know what I'm saying?
But that's gone by the wayside.
Really?
Because it's all the same drivers.
Well, you got to be politically correct nowadays and give everybody an opportunity.
Right.
But if some man walks out there with a blender, dude, he can keep it.
Yeah, I'm not interested.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, you're giving people opportunity, but you're not giving, you're not really, you know, you're not going to push my buttons, I don't think, as well.
Like, my mom, when I was growing up, my mom used to deliver these magazines called News on Wheels.
And it was a magazine that had pictures of like women, like semi-lewed women kind of laying on the hood of the, it was usually like a, not T-Mobile, what am I thinking of?
Prime Co.
It's like a T-Mobile, T-Top car.
Oh, there you go.
Yeah.
And so like a Corvette or something, you know, something that had a pack of Winstons in the dashboard.
You know what I'm saying?
Like something like that.
Yeah, some old, like, and so they would always have some lady laying on the front.
Oh, yeah.
And it would just be, and that would help sell the car.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
That's advertising.
Marketing.
It was advertising.
Yeah.
But yeah, that's kind of sexist now.
Damn, that's crazy, dude.
I mean, I get it, but also.
We used to have Hooters girls come and serve wings and stuff at our auction.
Okay, so there's a little bit of like… Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Right.
Okay, so take me, I'm sorry to interrupt you, Cam.
So take me through some of that.
What's that like, man, once you get the item?
So they kind of, do they always wheel the item out?
Yeah, the car will come in, so it's like a huge barn with like big bay doors.
And there's 18 lanes.
There's four to 18 lanes, depending on what auction we're working.
And they just drive the cars through.
The car sits there.
A lanes, when you say that, what does that mean?
I know what lanes is straight.
A bay.
Okay.
So like a big garage.
Okay.
So like if you were to take this garage door and open it up over here, it just goes through.
Auctioneers in the middle and you got the ring right there.
Okay.
And the car will roll up and it sits there for until pretty much until we find money on it, which is basically you get a bid.
Okay.
I'd say the toughest part is probably just finding the money, but it's also the easiest too because you can just drop it really low and go.
Okay, so a car rolls in, right?
And you, do you start the bidding or the audience starts the bidding?
We start the bidding.
So we look at our computer or if we have a rep next to us, there'll be a reserve or a floor what that dealer needs for that car.
So we usually start it around there, give or take.
And then from there, we find the money and then we go up and get some excitement and bids roll in.
Now, using that beginning moment, do you see people kind of talk to their friends?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
We read people.
We read people for and I didn't mean to interrupt, but they're waiting for you to drop back back, back, back, back, back.
And so you're fishing for fishing for money.
I see.
So you just drop down in numbers.
So who are you working for, the seller or the bidders?
Are you working for both?
We work for the auction, but we really work for the seller because we're selling his merchandise, his inventory.
Do you get a percentage of the sale of what's sold?
We wish.
We wish.
We get flat rate day labor, pretty much.
Okay.
Flat rate.
Now, if you were to put on the auction, like my grandpa owned the auction, of course, he got a percent, a buy fee and a sell fee.
Right.
So yeah, he would get percent.
Okay.
But as an auctioneer, we're just independent contractors.
Because that makes you really wonder if you had like Bruce Buffer or something in there from UFC or something, or you had, you know, it's tough.
You know?
Like if you had somebody that had that golden throat on them, it might be golden throat.
Would they get a little extra?
That's passion.
Yeah.
That's What I call passion.
I mean, that's what I do every day because I'm passionate about what I do.
Yeah.
And yes, I get paid well for doing it, but I do it for the, I mean, I do it because I love to do it and it's fun.
It's funny.
It's fun.
It's never the same.
Really?
Yeah, it's different every day.
Yeah.
Okay, so that item gets up there.
You got the item going now.
You started to kind of lower the money enough and monitor the crowd where I guess you're taking this, you get a vibe of an audience.
Same as a comedian.
After a while, you can't tell where things are happening.
Oh, you're reading people.
You really can, man.
And it's weird.
You can almost read a group of people.
Right.
You can almost feel little things of energy.
Oh, yeah.
So you're reading people, you get a bid, right?
Right.
All right.
You get that first bid, then where do you go from there?
You start going up.
Okay.
Yeah, you look for the second one.
And now, what if people, do you notice if people are feeling too pressure?
Like, I'm a nervous bidder, you know, so I would probably.
Oh, yeah, we read you.
It would be hard for me to like make that choice.
Do you slow down the verbiage and slow it down?
Yeah, or speed it up, and then they get nervous and bid.
Yeah.
Do that, bro.
Yeah.
That would be crazy, man.
I'll lose a damn wife like that.
Have you seen somebody make a bid and you always felt bad for them?
Oh, yeah.
Most definitely.
Most definitely.
But we're not there to babysit.
Yeah.
We're there to sell the cars.
We're there to sell cars.
And we want to make sure everyone's happy, but I feel like if you don't piss somebody off, you're probably not doing a good job.
You didn't have a good auction.
Wow.
If someone's not upset, you didn't have a good auction.
Really?
From one side, you know.
Right.
One side or the other.
Yeah.
What is the schooling like?
Take me through some of the auctioneer schooling, and what are you doing there?
Betty bought her bought some butter, but she said this butter's bitter bitter batter in my, I mean, just tongue twisters all day long.
Learn how to breathe.
10 hours a day.
Learn how to breathe.
Learn how to breathe.
That would be a hard one.
Yeah, for 10 hours a day for 10 days.
So it's not too hard.
Oh, I've breathed my whole life, but I couldn't imagine if I had to really section it off like that, it might get a little hairy.
But what about, take me through a couple of those.
Yeah, the, because everybody knew that growing up, like sea cells by the seashore.
Yeah, so you try to get your brain to think, think before you speak, before you speak, which is, you think that's normal, but when you're going that fast, you know, that's what the school really does.
It's like teach your brain to get up to that speed, essentially.
Okay.
Along with your mouth.
So take me through one of them if you remember them.
Betty Buttner bought some butter, but she says it's a butter bitter.
If I put it in my battery, it make my batter bitter.
So she bought a bit of bed of butter, put it in her bitter batter, made her bitter batter better.
So it's better.
So it's better.
Betty Butner bought a bit of bed of butter.
Dang.
I used to be able to do it a lot faster, but I don't practice the tongue twisters anymore.
Right.
You're past that.
Yeah, in school, man, you could fly through it.
And so you get these lessons, then you go back to class, and are you doing them in front of the other students?
Yeah, we do them as a group.
So everyone stand up.
Let's do Betty Butner.
Let's do Tommy Atatamus.
Yeah.
Climb two trees.
Tommy Antatamis.
I don't even remember.
Yeah, something like that.
Tommy Antatamis took two T's.
Climb to the top of two tall trees.
How long those ones?
And then Rubber Baby Buggy Buggy.
Yeah, Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers.
Yeah.
That one's tough.
I don't care who you are.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know.
Now, is there a type Cough drops.
Cough drop.
Grease that wand.
I'm a big cough drop guy.
Oh, you are?
Yeah.
Okay, so you'll ride that Lozens, Daddy.
I feel that.
Because I'm wondering what I...
You know what I mean?
It helps you breathe.
Yeah.
Helps you breathe.
And keeps your throat slick.
Yeah, I like that.
Slick throat.
That's key, huh?
Yeah, my bag.
When I go to work, in my bag is my microphone and about eight or ten cough drops.
I bet I lost my voice on Tuesday.
Yeah?
Yeah.
What were you guys selling?
Cars.
Okay.
Yeah.
We primarily do cars every day.
I mean, that's.
And that world's growing.
I mean, I feel like the car auction, like I have friends, like I don't know if I just have friends that have some money now or something, but I got friends sometimes.
And like, I'll go over to their house, like, yeah, just buying a car on my phone, sight unseen.
I see a lot of people buying stuff online.
Has the online business diminished you guys' business?
It's on Twitter.
It's working on it.
Yeah.
For sure.
There's these.
Luckily, though, there's enough independent owners that we work for that believe in the old-fashioned, the touch it, feel it, smell it, come put your hands on it, cater, service, hooter girls, food trucks, stuff like that, that will keep the business alive.
Right, the experience.
Yeah.
These are like independent owners.
Right.
The independent owners.
Mom and pop sales, potentially, you know, smaller ones, but they're still pretty big.
And then you have the big corporate sales.
You know, that's, I think that's the way that they're going, though.
And so do you guys get, is there another, what's kind of like out to pasture for an auctioneer?
Because if you're a comedian, sometimes you end up doing, you'll see a comedian end up doing a little magic, you know?
And we're not saying that they put him out to pasture, but that's kind of like, you know, it's kind of the, it's the elevator down kind of from the career a little bit.
Oh, he's doing magic over there, you know, which is fine.
No, I mean, magicians are comedians arch nemesis.
That's always been the thing.
Right.
You know, you'll see them talk shit a lot and really hate each other as much as they can, but not say it.
But is there a side hustle that the skill of auctioneering kind of like lends itself to afterwards or alongside of it?
Well, in my deal and his deal, he does real estate on the side, and I play with cars.
We have a lot of free time after these auctions, too.
We get done.
So we start at like 9. We get done at like 11.30 or noon.
So we have the rest of the day.
Okay.
Oh, we work three to four days a week, and that's it.
And then we have just a ton of extra time.
And is there reasons that auctions take place in the morning?
Is there something to that?
Because the dealers have other things to do in the afternoons.
Now, there are other auctions that take place in the afternoons and at night.
You know, there's some night auctions that cater to the mom and pop car dealers, the note dealers that can't be there in the morning because they're attending to their car lots.
And so they'll have a night sale.
Oh, yeah.
And there's usually a smaller, and they're usually a more fun atmosphere.
Night's fun.
They'll have coolers full of beer out there for them.
And then they get drunk and buy shit that they didn't even buy.
And they'll sell shit, too, that they...
That's cheap.
Damn.
Oh, that's funny.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I can see that.
Yeah, it's funny when you put a little bit of liquor in there that you can see that can happen.
Even I've just been to like, you know, sometimes somebody take you to a golf dinner or one of those things where rich people are playing golf and then they buy, you buy, you know, Drew Brees sign football or something, or they get some damn Reg Ewane like cooking, you know, utensils or something, and people will buy them.
For 10, 5, yeah, it's crazy.
10,000 bucks.
Sometimes it's just rich people trying to show off.
Oh, yeah.
We do some games.
Yeah, and that's a tax deduction, too.
Yeah, we do some games.
Oh, that's true, huh?
That's what they're doing.
They're donating.
I see.
So what type of event, what type of what do you do to prepare before an auction?
Like, is there kind of a series of things you go through, or at this point, is it kind of just by rote?
At this point, it's really, really natural for me and probably him, too.
I mean, he's been doing it 10 years, and I've been at three to six auto auctions a week for the last 25 years of my life.
Okay.
Every week.
So it's pretty natural.
Yeah, we just kind of show up.
We don't know what the inventory is until it kind of rolls through the door.
We show up, we have a meeting, and then with the auction crew and the staff, and then we check our sound system, and that's pretty much it.
Yeah, like a sound check kind of thing.
Yeah, sound check, and then the cars roll through, and everything we need is on the screen, and we just sell them.
Now, do you get a lot of, who are the type of people that buy a lot of things?
Is it a lot of like, do you see a lot of the same type of collectors go to different events?
Do you see, is it a lot of like celebrities and rich people?
Is it just the lovers of automobiles?
What type of people are bidding on car dealers?
Just car dealers?
We mainly work dealer-only auto auctions.
Oh, we see the same dealers.
So we see the same dealers.
So like I could show you video clips in my phone where I'm calling out people by name.
Hey, hey, Glenn, do you need this?
Hey, hey, Hector.
Hey, hey, this, that, and the other.
Because we've known him for so long and we build relationships with these people because we see them week after week after talking to them.
It's a lot of shit to them, too.
It has to be.
Yeah, we do.
We jacklock them.
Oh, yeah.
It's a lot of fun.
We just talk shit.
And we talk shit because we learn people's buying habits and we know what they're going to do.
So when something comes in that we know they have to have it.
You know what I mean?
It's right up their alley.
Yeah, we have fun with it.
Oh, yeah.
We make it fun.
Oh, interesting.
So if I go to like a used car lot or any type of car lot, right?
They probably bought it at an auction.
They probably bought it at an auction.
Potentially.
Because I remember when I was growing up, my mom used to go to the police auction sometimes.
She was dating a man that owned a car wash.
And she would go over there sometimes, a lot of times.
And one time, I think we almost had a police car for a little while, like a used police car.
And they got it at the police auction.
That was always a big thing, the police auction.
Yeah.
You know, you'd always hear about that.
And I guess that was cars that had been impounded or something, and then they were getting rid of them.
A lot of auction trucks drive those cars because they can go fast because we travel a lot.
That's the main part of the job is travel.
Really?
That's the hardest part of our job.
Yeah, is getting to them.
Just getting to them.
Yeah.
And are they in big cities, small towns?
Where are they?
Usually big cities.
You know, San Antonio, Austin, Dallas.
You know, there's a ton here in Nashville.
I'm sure there's probably five or ten, you know, in this area.
Memphis has a bunch.
Every big city probably has a couple auto auctions.
All right.
We got some show announcements here.
We have some new dates.
Some shows have been added in Cincinnati, in Charlotte.
We've added over there in Durham, North Carolina.
Chattanooga, you got another one.
You get a show.
You get a show.
Knoxville.
Wilmington is still available.
Wilkes-Buyer.
Pennsylvania, we added.
Charleston, we added a show.
And we also added shows, new cities, Portland, Maine, up there in the Black Bear continent.
And Burlington, Vermont.
I'm going to come and get that coat.
So we'll see what we can do.
We also added a new one in Albany and a new show in Columbus.
All dates available, theovon.com slash tour.
Make sure to get your tickets through there so the prices aren't all jacked up.
And I look forward to seeing you at the show.
Sometimes I wonder if there's something in the way of my happiness, and there is.
That's what the answer always is.
And so if you're struggling with that and feeling like your happiness is really a cul-de-sac, then maybe you need better help.
That's right.
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You know, sometimes debt is hellish.
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Let's get a question right here that came in for you guys.
you know him, yeah.
Hey, how's it going?
My name's Anthony out of San Antonio.
And the question for the auctioneers I had was: What's the craziest thing that y'all auctioned off, and how much was it?
Gang, gang.
Gang, Anthony, thank you, bro, for the question, man.
Now, that's a good, that, that's a good one.
Yeah, where does that land?
Vasectomy.
Really?
Yeah.
That clip, huh?
Yeah.
And how did somebody have a free when they had a gala?
Yeah, so I was at a gala event.
Oh, yeah.
And yeah, it was just one of those items that they put up there.
I don't remember what it sold for.
I'm sure it was like $10,000 or so.
But that was the craziest thing, for sure.
Just the backstory of some wife and husband sitting there bidding on a damn.
I don't want anymore.
She's raising the bid.
You know, and he's wondering what in the hell's going on.
She knows she's planning on maybe divorcing down the line, so she's trying to limit the inheritance.
Damn.
Crazy cars, too, but masectomy was definitely the.
For me, I think one time I think me and him were working together, and I think we sold a yellow lab puppy for like $60,000.
Oh, yeah.
Absolutely.
No way.
Was that Sea Biscuit or whatever?
Damn.
It was an event.
It was a fundraiser for a medical group.
And I mean, it was in.
They sell his dogs.
Dogs go crazy at those events.
It was a puppy.
I bet.
Especially labs.
Maybe it was like a sounder part of it.
You know what I'm saying?
Remember that famous dog that died in that movie, Sounder?
But damn, $60,000.
I think the highest priced car I've ever sold was, I wasn't actually auctioneering.
I was working the ring in Houston, Texas.
And it was a Bentley for $330,000.
There was a, I worked an auction in Amelia Island, Florida, a classic car sale.
And it was a car that I think Porsche and Ferrari, one of those types of cars, they built like two of these cars together.
This was one.
It was literally a rust bucket.
$950,000 is what it sold for.
And I was working the floor, the ring like he was.
And why?
Why?
Why?
I think it's just collector.
It was a collector.
I mean, they're so rare.
There's only a couple of them.
I don't know if that's a furbished or whatever.
I guess.
I don't know.
I have no idea.
Well, in my situation, that $330,000 Bentley was, in my mind, at dealer cost, and they were going to go sell it for $5.50,000.
For retail.
Wow.
Yeah.
Man.
And we're talking about this happening, somebody spending $330,000 in a matter of 25 to 45 seconds.
Man.
And so if that bidding starts out at $10,000 or something, like how quick, like how do you know when to differentiate between a bid you're seeing on the floor and a bid that you are getting sent up to you from the ring?
I mean, you're both seeing the same thing.
So you're both on the same wavelength.
And if the bid, let's say the bid starts at 10 grand and there's eight people down there just bidding, bidding, bidding.
You'll go from 10, 1 to 2.5, 5. You'll jump it up to 2.5, 5, 7.5, 11, 11, 2.5, 5, 7.5, 12. I mean, you read the crowd like that, just like you do.
It gets exciting, huh?
It's very exciting.
Fast-paced, too.
I think people like just hearing people count.
Remember, they had that, especially where I'm from, dude.
If somebody could count high, you would thought they were doing damn magic, you know?
I mean, half my neighborhood couldn't count.
You know what I'm saying?
We'd have people, you told them about 11, they fucking didn't know what you're talking about.
You know what I'm saying?
Like after 10, they thought it had something to do with Satan.
It was real, just kind of novice numerical types, you know?
Oh, yeah.
What is, take me through some of that bidding.
Like, give me, show me a little bit of that magic, you know?
You want some magic?
Yeah, like if we're bidding on something, you know.
How do you know, like, what are some bids people do?
Do people still do the thing that like they'll touch their face, wink?
And then, like, some people will turn away from you and, like, tap their leg or tap their face.
Shake their head no and then wink at you.
Yeah, shake their head no, wink at you.
And they hide from each other.
Yeah.
Play games with each other.
Really?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, it's fun.
And you, you, and you're sitting up here, so you see all the games.
And it's hilarious, yeah.
But you get involved with the games with them.
Totally.
Yeah, there's some rivalries out there.
You know, you know, there'll be people, where's the money?
Where's the money?
And you're like, I'm fixing to show you.
I got it.
Wow.
So you'll know.
You'll know.
And sometimes the audience won't know who's doing it.
What's going on?
And guys over there in the corner just.
Oh, they play with each other so much.
And it's more so the experienced and the skilled dealers versus the younger newcomers that don't know because there's always a new dealer that comes into the auction and doesn't have a clue as to what's going on.
Wow.
He's just standing out front like this.
Yeah.
And, you know, the first two or three months are an education or an exit.
Oh, because he could be spending too much.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, he's going to get them sold.
If he doesn't get it figured out, I mean, he's going to exit the business because he owes a bunch of money.
Wow.
And how much of it, I know in Texas, so many things are kind of like, is there any demographic to the business, to that whole bidding world?
Is it predominantly white?
Is it mixed?
Is it Latino?
We have a lot of Middle Eastern.
It's very mixed.
Middle Eastern, too.
There's a lot of Middle Eastern.
And it also depends on the city you're working in, too.
Right.
Like in the Valley, obviously, lots of Latino people.
We work in San Antonio twice a week.
Tuesday and Wednesday.
And then when I get done there, I drive to McAllen, Texas and spend the night and work an auction there on Thursday morning.
And it's mostly Hispanic.
I mean, there's a lot of people who are.
But it's really close to the border.
Is it part of what kind of culture do you feel like?
Is it part of Southern culture?
Is it part of auto culture?
Is it part of livestock culture?
Like, where does kind of auctioneering, where does some of that roots come from?
I know you talked about the colonels, you know, in the military, and that's sort of where the name of that position kind of came from.
But can you tell me any more about how that, the, the fast talking and then separately, like, do you know, can you feel at all where that tradition kind of came out of?
You know, I mean, I know over there, like in Across the pond in England, they do it slow.
Oh, they do it really slow, like art auctions and stuff.
It's a slow process.
Yeah, you'll fall asleep.
But I think the Latin root for auction is action.
So it's like all about action.
So it's just a way to sell a lot of items really quickly.
I see.
And competitive bidding matter.
So like it's really a good way to get a train ride evaluation, pretty much, of what that product's worth.
Interesting.
Because you've got a bunch of people there and they're bidding on it.
So you'll get an appraisal for that.
In my mind, it's a southern culture, but there's auctions all over the world and all over the United States.
New York, everywhere.
I guess because I was raised southern.
Right.
For me, it's southern culture.
It's a southern thing.
Yeah, it's interesting because I started thinking about it.
I feel like there's a book with Mark Twain where they talk that there's an auction or something in one of those stories.
I'm just trying to think of where I first kind of learned about auctioning or heard about it.
And I can't really remember.
So then I'm trying to think, well, what, yeah, is there a culture that it fits in with?
And then, yeah, it's a business.
It's a way of getting people to do business.
It is interesting to know that you could immediately kind of get an idea of a product.
It could almost be anything.
Right.
If you got the right crowd there, too.
Can you start to know a little bit?
Could you guess almost like guessing somebody's weighted a fair like that guy gets used to knowing the scale and knowing the people?
Can you almost definitely guess what I'm getting a bid for?
Oh, yeah, because we know what they did the week prior.
And we pretty much know the car market.
Yeah, we know what ends are worth.
That being said, paying attention to what's going on and knowing the car market and remembering what that car brought the week prior, knowing who bought it the week prior, it sets a stage.
You see what I'm saying?
And so we can tell you what you're driving out there.
We have no idea what it is, but if we went out there and walked around it, we could give you a really good idea of what it was worth.
Oh, okay.
Dang.
As long as it's nothing crazy exotic.
Right.
Yeah, it is not, man.
It's a 2019 Ford Ranger.
Perfect.
Here's a fellow right here that had an inquiry.
What's up, Theo?
It's your boy Steen here in Louisville, Kentucky.
A beautiful little evening.
I'm calling in to ask a question to your auctioneer, buddy.
Mr. Auctioneer, I want to know if you think you have what it takes to make it in the freestyle rap game.
I know a lot of times auctioneers, they can think real fast, talk real fast.
I think it makes a lot of sense that you could potentially be freestyling over some instrumental.
If so, do you think you have what it takes in that game?
Gang, gang.
Gang, baby.
That's a good question.
Yeah.
I love old school rap.
Yeah.
And I practice in the mirror and absolutely no.
No, me neither.
I can count fast.
That's it.
Like if the song was about numbers, yeah.
Right.
Put it over a beat, but other than that, no.
You ever dress up like that Sesame Street guy, the count?
No.
That Twister song.
There was a Twister song that came out a while back.
I used to be able to basically go along with that song for like 30 seconds.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
I thought it was cool.
Oh, yeah, I could see that.
I can pretty much sing my posse on Broadway.
Yeah.
But, you know, I got to have that song playing with me.
Yeah, yeah.
I feel you.
Who doesn't?
What about the, is there like a, do people using uppers and drugs and stuff like that to get that, you know, to stay fluid out there on the count course, you notice, or, you know, when they're out there, is there people using uppers?
No, not in my world.
It's a pretty, pretty clean-cut world.
I mean, you know, your mind's got to be sharp.
It's got to be sharp.
Your mind's got to be sharp.
Absolutely.
You can't go in there, you know, foggy and continue to maintain work.
You know what I mean?
You got to be sharp and on your game.
What's a mistake that you can make as an auctioneer?
Sell it for the wrong low, the wrong floor.
Miss a bid.
Yeah, miss a bid.
Yeah, there's a lot of mistakes for sure.
You can make a ton of mistakes.
And it's a split decision second that you got to make.
And once you make it, you got to live with it and back yourself.
As soon as you say sold, I mean, it's done.
It's a legal binding contract.
Once you say sold, you know, like I said earlier, you know, you're looking into the, you're waiting for the online, the rep to tell you it's okay to sell it.
And you got a guy on the floor right here and you're watching him and you're watching the computer and you're going back and forth and the seller's kind of hesitant and you're watching, you're waiting and waiting and you're wanting to sell it and you're waiting and waiting and waiting and then boom, sold.
And then all of a sudden the internet starts flashing.
Yeah.
Well, you forgot to look back up there.
And I mean, but you got to live with it.
Yeah.
It happens.
Let's hear a little bit of that lingo, man.
So how do you start it?
Say it's like something's about, something starts at $30, you know?
Or is that a regular thing, like $30?
Yeah, we usually start at some point.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cars.
You bought that blender.
That girl was selling.
Look, I've been on a couple of beanie babies before.
You know what I'm saying?
I bought some real low-market stuff.
We'll start something at $1,000.
Yep, thousand, $11,000 to get up, I get a $12, $13, $13, $14,000, $15, I got a $16, $17, $18.
Yep, $18, $19, now $2,000.
Back it up, I got a $2,000.
You're out, Theo.
Yep, two grand.
I got up again.
Sean's out.
$21.
They got up again.
Sean.
Now two.
Two, two, two.
Back it up.
I got a 23. Yep, four.
Back it up.
I got a 24. Theo, five.
They get up again to $2,500.
Don't I'll now fine fine five.
Big it up.
I got all Leonard.
I have sold $2,400 to buy a number.
Sean.
Too late, sir.
You're out.
And so is the sound that you're making spanky.
Is that the ring guy?
Is that the guy in the ring?
Yes.
Okay.
Yes.
So he's just telling him another bid is coming up.
Yes.
Okay.
Yeah, so we just go up every time I hear him yell.
Wow.
I don't even have to see him.
And it's exciting for the crowd.
You know, you got some guy down here yelling.
What the hell is he doing?
Yeah.
Totally amazing.
That's a funny thing.
I'm going to hear him yell again.
Yeah.
Bid.
Working the ring.
If I bid, he's going to yell again.
Dude, some men bring a woman with them who grudges them into it, and that makes it.
Yes.
Dang.
I can see it already, man.
I mean, look, it does everything.
You know, if I'm with a gal, I get the damn artichoke dip or something.
I wasn't planning on doing that.
You know, I was just going for a couple mains and that, so you know, we're sitting there.
Yeah, now we're having, you know, now it's, you know, who knows what's going on.
So I feel you.
Yeah, it's interesting how that'll get a man to freaking.
Every car dealer likes to walk in nice shoes.
Oh, yeah, they do, huh?
Part of that culture, huh?
It is that culture.
Yeah.
Now, is there like a lot of babies out there on the lot?
Is there like a lot of like, you know, is there like a door, you know?
But is there any of that?
Is there any like kind of ladies out there, any freaking wager thoughts or anything like that that are running around?
You know, I will say that most of the ladies that are in the industry have my utmost respect because they are very professional and they, you know, they learn the business just like a man and they buy cars and sell cars just like just like the men do.
Right.
And they're very respected and they're very respectful to us.
But is there any like, are there ladies that come just to try and get onto the or are there men that try to come and just attach onto the ladies, not the actual bidders?
But is there like a not really.
Not really.
Not really.
And most of the ladies that are there and most of the ladies that come and buy, not 100%, but most of them are married into the business and they're there with their husband.
Okay.
And they're there buying cars.
It's a family business.
Yeah.
And they're buying and selling for their lots.
I see.
So you don't really have these ladies that are just kind of waiting around trying to hit on the men or anything like that like you would at maybe.
No, they won't last long.
Right.
Yeah.
The men will take them.
Yeah.
Quick.
Oh, really?
Yeah, I guess.
I'm trying to think of what else I would like to learn about that culture.
You know, what did you have that came in, Sean?
Hey, man, gang.
Luke Weed, Knoxville, Tennessee.
Out of every 10 words, how many of them are an actual word?
That's a good question.
Like, you know, like, is there, is some of that actual words?
Is it started off?
It started off as real words, or actual words.
You know, you start off with a basic chant, and then it kind of translates into something much faster, and you kind of shorten it, and you just kind of make it your sound.
Okay, your chant.
My chant started at is, would he give?
Would he give?
Would he give?
Two grand bin on 21 mama money, tune to two, but it's a tuna tuna to three and a three and a four and a five and a five.
Now 500 on the rambled up, 500 on the random now, 600 on the random now, 700 ram, buddy, but now seven, seven, seven.
Would he give?
What he give, would he give?
But it just, it speeds up over time and practice.
Interesting.
Mine started off as bid him and get him and get him and bid him.
Wow.
Which was heavy out the gates.
Which was my father's chant.
Oh, really?
My father's chant was bid him and get him and get him and bid him and bid him and get him.
I'd practice a lot with him, with my grandpa.
Yeah.
When I was younger.
So I'd go over there and we'd sit in his shed and we'd have fake auctions until I figured it out.
That's why I'm not.
And so I got his chant?
No, he's alive and well.
Alive and well.
I'm glad he's still alive.
Does he miss it?
Oh, yeah.
He calls every week.
How was the sale?
Checking.
How's the market?
I mean, every day.
He just can't help it.
It's so cool.
How's the market?
And he's 80 years old.
And I have an eight-year-old and a three-year-old.
Oh, wow.
And yeah, I'm a late man.
He's active.
Is he?
Yeah.
Get out there.
My mom still works at one of the auctions that I work at to this day.
Oh, that's cool.
She's a title clerk.
And yeah, he watches my eight-year-old and three-year-old every day while I'm at work.
So they keep him busy.
Yeah, I bet.
That'll keep him young for sure.
It's really one of the blessings I feel like of having grandchildren like that is if your parents are into it, if the grandparents are into it, it really gives them a whole new life as they get older.
My three-year-old and my father are best friends.
Oh, that's cute.
It's a really great relationship.
That's cool.
Very blessed and fortunate to have that.
Amen, bro.
Bit him and get him and get him and bit him.
Yep.
Bit him and get him and get him and bit him.
Bit him and get him and get them.
No, it sounds nothing like that.
No.
Really?
Well, I mean, you heard his chant.
I mean, that's what he's saying.
So it eventually evolves.
So they get you with that intonation there, or what is that called?
Your chant.
Chant.
Now, it's almost interesting you had your grandfather's chant.
It's almost like a Native American type of thing where, you know, a song or a tone would be passed around through a culture.
Right.
He's actually from Missouri, and that's, I mean, he went to school there, and he started working car auctions in 1974.
Selling tools and stuff.
And then, I mean, we'd, you know, we'd, as a young kid, 10, 12 years old, I can remember traveling around in the summers when I wasn't in school setting up tool auctions.
Wow.
And we would sell tools, cheap, I mean, China-made tools that he would go buy in Houston.
And we'd go sell them in all these rural cities.
That was eBay.
I mean, that was the original eBay.
Exactly.
You know, in some ways, I'm a traditionalist.
You know, I'm a begrudging, someone begrudgingly moving into like the modern world, I feel like sometimes because my dad was so old when I was young.
And so I think I was just enamored with like older practices and stuff, you know, and slower ways of life.
And I really, it's so nice because everybody kind of had a purpose.
There was so many more things you could find that you could actually do.
Whereas now with things getting automated, it's harder to, it's just harder to find some of those spaces.
But it's good to see that you guys still are.
And maybe, hopefully, do you feel like there could be a rebirth of like of the business kind of?
Do you feel like there's something new going on or what do you feel like?
Like, where's the future of auctioning kind of?
I hope they realize the importance of what we do.
You know, the computer can't do what we do.
I mean, the computer can count, but they can't make relationships like we do and make people feel comfortable and warmed and welcomed.
And it goes back.
That computer's not going to say, hey, Billy, do you looking for this Mercedes today?
You know what I mean?
And Billy likes to hear his name called over that microphone.
You know what I mean?
Billy likes for the auctioneer to say hi to him.
and I hope that it continues in that direction to where they see that we are a warming touch to the business.
Yeah.
If that makes sense.
No, I think it makes perfect sense, man.
It's like I think we all are trying to figure out ways to make the skills that we have still have value in a time of electronica, you know, really.
And that's okay.
It's just what's going on, you know.
Right.
Do you have that being said?
I took my dad, my 80-year-old father, into McDonald's probably a year ago.
And he said, hey, what is that?
I said, that's a kiosk where you can go order your food and you just pay for it right there.
And you don't need to talk to nobody.
He said, if I worked here, I'd pour Coca-Cola in that thing every day.
Try to fry it.
Yeah, I just saw an article last week where they're trying to do automated through the drive-through, which is kind of crazy.
I mean, part of the fun of even driving to audience.
I think it said like 20% gets placed or like 20% of the order.
I think I saw an article actually is correct right now.
Yeah, that's what they say.
Yeah, just mystery.
Yeah, just, which is what you kind of get anyway.
We got another good question that came in, Sean.
Hey, Theo.
This is Kevin from Sacramento.
What's up, Kevin?
This is not a hostage situation.
I'm actually just in my bedroom.
I saw your post about having the auctioneers there in the studio.
I do have a couple questions for the lovely guest you have there.
Have you ever had to use your skills outside of the job?
For instance, have you been at the bar?
Have you been at the grocery store?
Have you been buying a vehicle and it's just come in handy to have that slick speak?
Dang.
Yeah, when else does it come in handy?
Do people just want to see it or hear it?
We get asked all the time.
I don't care for a lady at the bar tonight.
Yeah, I'm not sure.
Oh, yeah.
At the bar, especially.
Really?
Friends.
The original warbler.
You're like the original woodpecker, like a nightingale.
Anytime you say I'm an auctioneer at the hotel.
Oh, really?
You talk fast?
Yeah, you're a fast talker?
Yeah, I get that.
They want to hear it, huh?
Oh, yeah.
And then I'm sure a lot of the ladies, it probably leads them into wanting to kiss, get a little French action, you know, a little tongue action.
We're going to see tonight.
There you go.
Damn.
You got some.
Good little fast tongues.
Yeah, somebody's not married.
This is the fastest tongue in the South right there.
Really?
I wouldn't say that, but I try.
But damn, I bet you could put a Werthers down in a couple seconds, couldn't you?
I can do my magic on a cough drop, yes, sir.
There we go.
Dang, baby, female cough drops only in this man's mouth, boy.
Yeah, someone is not married or soon to be not married.
Oh, really?
Yes.
You're going through divorce, huh?
Yes, sir.
Oh, man.
I have not been good in relationships, me, man.
I've struggled in either.
Really?
I'm a bad picker when it comes to that.
I'm the bad person.
I think I'm just not good at it.
I keep picking myself to put in them.
Try to find a bad pick tonight.
Oh, yeah, there you go.
Let's do it.
Might as well.
Look, there's a lot of ladies in this tank.
Spank me right there.
That's how they're going to spank me?
No, that's not why.
Spanky.
I got that nickname when I was probably in third or fourth grade because I looked just like Spanky, the little rascal.
Oh, yeah.
I love the little rascals.
That's how I got that nickname.
It stuck.
Dude, I'll tell you this story.
So I was a huge fan growing up of Nickelodeon and Nick at Knight, those type of television, black and white television.
And so I was a huge fan of Jerry Mathers.
Leave it to Beaver was the man, right?
So one time I got to play in this poker card tournament in Oklahoma.
And it was like in rural Oklahoma at a casino.
And so I get there and Jerry Mathers there.
And I mean, I had pictures of him on my wall growing up.
And he was way before my time.
But I just, for some reason, I like his name was Theodore in the show, Theodore Cleaver.
And that was my name.
So there he is right there.
Oh, yeah.
And I said, hey, you know, and I was so fired up, man.
And I mean, it looks just like the kid still.
It's pretty crazy.
And I said, hey, I live at, he's, I said, hey, you know, I'm a big fan.
You know, I was like, where are you?
He's like, I live in California.
I was like, oh, I used to live in Santa Monica.
And this is a little bit vulgar, but he goes, I used to go get some hussy in Santa Monica.
And I was like, what?
Like, of all the things I'd seen this man only as a kid.
And then he just hit me.
He's the perfect role model to grow up.
He was the perfect kid.
He was the perfect one.
And then he hit me with that.
And I was like, oh, man.
Just ruined it.
Yeah, it's just crazy when you always want your heroes to kind of be a certain way and then they're just mortals, you know, or immortals.
I don't know which one is what.
But I look just like Spanky as a kid growing up.
I could see that a little bit to better.
That's where I got that nickname.
I could see it.
But you look pretty young, though.
You feel pretty young.
I feel great.
Yeah.
And did you know that Cam was going to be your son who was going to be able to have that ability?
Was there any other children you had that you saw that could be that have that possession?
I have another 18-year-old that has no interest in it at all, that he's more of a hands-on guy.
He would rather tear something apart and build it back up.
But Cameron took a lot of interest in it at a very young age, 14, 15. And that was a lot.
Back then, the scare of the internet taking over wasn't there at all.
So he had a lot of interest in it.
And I knew that I could help him and he would have a good career in it.
And so the day he graduated, he graduated high school on a Saturday.
And on the next Tuesday, he was on a flight to Missouri going to Missouri auction school.
Wow, were you really?
So no doubt.
No doubt.
And you knew even young, you knew when you were young, huh?
Yeah, I'd say I really got interested.
You know, I was working at my grandpa's auto auction, picking up trash and doing whatever they wanted me to do, jumping cars, jumpstart the battery, parking cars, whatever.
And then I think like probably 14 years old, he sat me down.
He said, hey, you want to start working the ring?
And so he kind of trained me up on it and threw me in the ring.
And we started working, you know, every Tuesday and Thursday.
In high school, I would actually leave class early, I'd leave at noon on Tuesdays and go to the auction.
I had a couple teachers that would let me do it.
Oh, nice!
Yeah, so I mean, at a young age, for sure, I took an interest to it, very interested.
What is the course?
How do you graduate the auction school?
There's really no test, but after you, so you go to school and then you get a certification, essentially, and then you have to take a state test to be licensed through the state.
Yeah, every state is different.
Yeah.
And now, is that a morning you show up and you got to be able to really rattle?
No, it's not a written test.
It's a written test.
Oh, damn.
Yeah.
So your certification is for school basically lets you have the ability to take the test.
Until 10 years ago, you didn't even have to go to school.
But now most states have required that you have 80 hours of schooling before you're eligible for the test.
Okay.
Is there something, is there any like dark arts kind of involved out there with auctioning, like where people are like putting products up there, like any kind of dirty business that kind of comes through that you're able to see that you keep an eye on or anything that's happened over the years?
Not that you guys are pushing.
There's bad apples in every business.
Of course.
I've seen a lot of stuff.
It's janky stuff.
I've seen people break hood release and dump ice down in the dash to make it look like the air was called.
Man.
Put a radio picture of a radio in the hole.
Where the hole is and sell it so that you know when you look at through the window.
It looks all good.
It looks like the radio's there.
It was a picture of a radio.
Dang, and you get in there and it's just a hole.
Yeah, there's some shady stuff going on every once in a while.
Yeah, for sure.
I could see that, man.
I could see that.
I'm trying to feel like...
They'll buy it.
Whoever buys it, usually.
Usually whoever's the one bidding hot and heavy on it is the guy that did it.
That's awesome.
Has there ever been like a guy who was coming up who was like a great auctioneer and then something happened to him?
Like, is there any like good lore or anything in the auctioneer industry like that?
We have a good friend that was awesome auctioneer, been an awesome, awesome, awesome auctioneer for years and years and years and just couldn't get off the bottle.
Yeah.
Yeah, it happens, man.
He was great too, man.
One of the best to listen to.
One of the best.
He was fine.
Had a good, fast chant.
I mean, just really, really good.
And just couldn't get off the bottle.
Yeah.
It's heavy, man.
Yeah, I had a friend, like, who drowned last week, actually.
He was on drugs, and he tried to hide from the police, and he hid underwater.
Wow.
And you can't do that.
I mean, you can do it, but it's a limited time space.
And so he died.
Yeah, it's wild.
And so that man passed away?
No.
No, he's still alive, but he's not working.
He's just not working.
He doesn't have any jobs.
Yeah.
It's tough to see that kind of thing.
Oh, yeah.
Very tough.
I hit the clothes from cops.
Did you?
Yeah.
I thought I was going to get away, but I didn't.
Damn.
That's what you do, you put your lips out of it?
Nah, me and some friends of mine, we wahooed some beer.
I don't know if you know what that means.
And this is, you know, I was probably 19, 20 years old, many, many years ago.
And so the cops show up, and I go back to the apartment, and I say, man, I'm just going to get in the pool and hang out here until they leave.
And so I hung out in the pool, and this is in January.
And that's a weird choice when the cops come out and see the pool and somebody's.
No, they never even came to the pool because they didn't even think to look in the pool in January.
So I go walking back to my apartment thinking I'm in the clear and there I go and they're like, hey, get on the ground.
I'm like, what, man?
I've been at the pool.
And they're like, it's January, you idiot.
Get on the ground.
Yeah, man.
I'm trying to think if I had some good ones with cops, man.
I had a friend whose car, something had happened to it, speaking of autos, and there was some kind of deficiency or something under the hood.
And when they rebuilt it, they built the seats backwards, right?
So the seats, the backwards was the front of the car.
And so he'd get pulled over all the time.
You know, cops is like, oh, you're driving backwards.
And he's like, well, I'm not.
You know, it's just the way this car, they put the, you know, they, whenever they redid it, they kind of did it messed up or whatever.
And he'd always get pulled over and busted, dude, D-U-I, or like they would breathalize him all the time.
Yeah.
You know, but people just couldn't get it in their head that a man's driving a backwards car.
Yeah.
Not necessarily driving backwards.
Right.
But pretty keen to see visually.
So what's something over the years that's kind of like, is there discrepancies down there in the big pistols?
In the ring?
Yeah.
Very much so.
You're always bumping chests and talking trash.
Yeah.
Car dealers getting upset with each other.
I mean, I've seen one car dealer get mad at another one and the one had a flashlight, you know, them big mag lights, you know, and then this guy was going to beat the shit out of him with his flashlight.
And the other dealer, he took the flashlight away from the guy and beat the shit out of him.
Yeah, boy.
I've also seen another auctioneer get upset with a dealer.
And I didn't actually see it.
I wasn't there, but it's been a well-known story for years and years.
And car dealer flipped the auctioneer off, and the auctioneer came off the block.
That's a fight.
And by the time he got down there, the guy had a knife and put it to his throat and said, come on, big boy.
Damn.
It's like I'm backing up now.
I'm going back up to my block.
Yeah.
Wow.
I mean, it used to get pretty Western, you know, back in the day.
I'm sure.
But now there's cameras and everything.
Every year.
You know, and everybody's calmed down now.
That's much calmer.
It's much calmer.
Yeah, you kind of missed that road, you know, when it was a little bit of a rockier road.
A lot of times the roads are tough.
Teasier times, though.
That's true.
Rockier road, but easier times.
It's always the good old days.
It always is, huh?
When you're in it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, it really is.
Did you meet your wife at an auction?
I did not.
I met my wife in San Marcus.
Not at an auction.
Okay.
And that's where you guys are based out of, San Marcus.
Yeah, New Bronfles.
Oh, yeah, New Bronfles.
I've heard really cool things about it.
My friend Steve Trevino is a comedian down there in New Brunfels.
It's great, yeah.
And he's a great dude, and he loves it down there.
Beautiful up there.
It's great.
Rivers, it's awesome.
It's a Beautiful place.
Is it?
You ought to come visit us.
Yeah, I'm going to come visit.
I'll probably have to come down there and do a show at some point.
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So let's get to one more question that came in from someone.
Hola, Senor Vaughn.
This is a question for the auctioneers.
I'm just wondering if there is like a need to practice this.
Is there any application to the bedroom?
You know, like quick, quick, quick, be in the bed, in the band, in bed, quick, thank it, pants.
We're going to be in the bathroom, pants, pants, pants, baby, we go underway.
It's not a way, you know what I'm saying?
I just need to understand if it's applicable and like, how do you guys do it?
Gang, gang.
Yeah, window.
Yeah, do women, we kind of touched on it, but yeah, I guess women want to see the action a little bit, huh?
They, I don't, you know, women like fast talkers.
Yeah, they do, huh?
Yeah, it's kind of hard to, yeah.
Is it a fast, is it, what are ways that you feel like the ability to do auctioneering correlates in the other type of like uses in life?
Is there any time that you notice it's so fast-paced that like it slows things down?
Like everything else is kind of like.
And it's just the opposite for me.
It's made me very OCD.
I mean, everything has got to be just.
Yeah.
I mean, everything has got to be just absolutely perfect in my world or I'm just in a in a like, for instance, he was telling me they'd rather us be late today than be early.
And I'm at 12.45, I'm telling him, hey, we got to get an Uber.
You know, we got to go.
We got to go.
And then we're in the Uber at 1.20, just leaving the hotel.
And I'm like, man, I feel so awful.
We're going to be late.
Oh, yeah.
He's doing math in his head.
He's like, if we get there in seven minutes, and I mean, that's just my world.
I mean, and I mean, everything before I go to bed at night, everything is laid out and ready for the next day.
And I mean, my schedule's set.
And I mean, everything's just got to be boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, perfect.
And was your dad that way?
I'm just trying to.
I don't know where you got it from.
Oh, I think it's, I don't know.
I'm not that way.
Because it's interesting that two different types of people then could both do this job, you know, so it's not really like in the per.
That's just me.
Right.
You know what I mean?
That's just me.
And, you know, in reality, you know, my mother is a lot of the same way.
So I think I get some of that from my mother, but I think a lot of it comes with just being up there and being in control of everything.
Oh, yeah.
At, you know, so many days a week.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, I can see that.
Yeah.
That control is a big thing, man.
Managing it and just making sure everything's perfect for everybody involved.
Right.
You know what I mean?
And that's the kind of way I live my life.
Yeah.
Running smooth.
Is there, what are some, how long is the experience when you're up there on stage?
You're doing an auction, right?
And you said it's in the morning.
Starts usually around 9. And then how long is the action?
And is it just straight action the whole time?
Are there breaks?
What's that?
Pretty straight action.
Usually it depends on how many cars you have.
You know, different lanes will shut down at different times because one lane will have 100 cars and the next lane will have 200 cars.
So it just depends.
But yeah, it's straight action for two hours, give or take.
Two to three hours.
And do you ever auction more than one item at the same time or no?
No.
No.
Okay.
And we all have our own lane and we go and we start the sale.
So there's 18 of them.
So there's a lot of dealers are running from lane to lane, like coming in late, trying to bid, throwing paper, flicking us off and cursing at us.
It's fun.
But yeah, it's fast.
It's real fast.
People are just running lane to lane trying to bid on cars.
And some lanes, there's at some auctions, there's two lanes in one lane.
In the front of the barn, there'll be one lane, and then in the back of the barn, there'll be another lane.
So you'll have like, let's say you'll have a lane five car come in the front, and lane six in the back, and then they both leave at the same time, and then two more cars come in.
Oh, wow.
So it's a lot of volume.
A lot of volume.
How many items do you want to go through an auction and one of those morning auctions?
On Wednesday, we had, what did we have, 1,600, 1,800 cars?
Yeah.
No.
On Tuesday, we probably had 800 to 1,000.
800-ish.
Watch.
Yeah.
Wow.
And we're in a couple hours.
Oh, man, there's tons.
Yeah, especially on Tuesday.
There's a ton of Wednesdays.
There's online bidding, too.
Right.
Yeah.
There's like each lane, like I think on Wednesday, my lane, I think I had 120 people online.
And then in lane, you know, 80 to 100 to 200 to 300 people.
Yeah, quite a bit of folks.
Dang, and is there like a food truck out there or anything?
Sometimes they food trucks.
A little bit of a deal, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
People come out.
Yeah, there used to be a cat.
People get hungry.
Yeah.
So they have to be there to keep them there.
Yeah, we want to keep them there until the sale's over.
That's a trick.
Yeah, that's wild, man.
That's wild, dude.
He ever walks off anything real wild?
Anybody selling coffins or anything like that?
Anything like any treasure?
I know one car dealer that sells headstones at his car lot and has a car lot?
Oh, never mind.
And sells headstones on the same property.
Dang.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
That's pretty cool.
One-stop shop.
Well, especially if he cuts the brake cords on those cars.
You know what I'm saying?
That's repeatable.
He'll give you a deal.
Okay, cool.
Let's get into a couple more of these questions, man.
People were really intrigued.
So, you know, I was just driving through town about a month ago and I drove by.
It said auction, auctioneer on the sign.
I was like, oh, my God.
I was like, what is all, where are these people?
Yeah, where are they?
What are they doing?
So this is real fascinating, man, just to hear about it.
And Theo, my question's for the father-son auctioneer duo.
My question is, can you guys read really fast?
I'm not a good reader.
I could barely read, but I'm not a great talker either.
So I figured if I could talk that fast, I could probably read fast.
Thanks, guys.
Gang, gang.
Gang, maybe that's a good question.
Yeah.
Not at all.
I've gotten faster at reading, but no.
I just learned how to read the less you take in.
Yeah.
For me.
Huh.
I just learned how to read.
Oh, yeah.
I'm a slow reader.
You see what I'm saying?
Yeah, I'm a slow reader, too.
The faster you read or the faster you try to get through it, the less you get out of it.
Right.
Yeah, that's kind of how I am, I think, man.
It's like I got to read it a couple times.
Yeah, for sure.
If you read it too fast, you got to go back.
No, I don't think that really equates.
If you lose your track, you're running a bid, right?
Every time you lose your track, it's just...
Do you call a timeout?
The screen, there's a screen out there that usually helps if we forget where we're at.
But nowadays, I mean, it's just like, like you said, it's like breathing.
It's like second nature to us.
You can do it in your sleep pretty much.
But you get to thinking about something else while you're up there.
Think about what you're going to have for lunch.
There's not a lot of action going on on the floor, and you get to thinking about something and you're at 28,000.
Next thing you say is 18,000.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Oh, I mean 28,000.
I mean 28,000.
You just jump right back to that.
There's a screen, though, that they follow us.
And so the last thing we said is usually on the screen.
So you got some support.
Yeah, just in case.
But it happens for sure.
Has any auctioneers ever been killed or anything like that in the line of duty?
Not that I know of.
Not in the line of duty.
Nope.
Oh, that's good.
That is good.
Yeah, let's get to another question from a guy.
Probably some car dealers that want to kill some auctioneers.
Oh, really?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Is there some inside work going on?
Is there like kind of like they'll try and bait you or take you out to dinner or something?
I mean, we just mess with them so much.
You know what I mean?
We see them every week.
Yeah, we see them every week, and we know their kids' names, and we're all buddies.
We like to mess with them.
But when we're up there, it's straight business.
It is.
I mean, it's straight business.
And we have a figure we have to get to.
They may not like that figure, but we are doing our damnedest to get to that figure.
Yeah, right.
Our job is to sell the car.
Right.
So.
Hey, Theo, how you doing?
My name is Joe from Rockville, Maryland.
This is at a car place.
Got a quick question for you and your fast-talking friends.
Yeah, how much water do you drink?
Must get a sore throat.
Hoorah.
Amen, brother.
Thanks, Joe, man.
Yeah, yeah.
You guys stay hydrated.
I know you can see it.
And are any of them outdoors?
All of them are indoors?
Equipment sales, some of them are outdoors.
They'll like the ones I've worked before, they'll be outside, but mainly it's just like big barns, big shops.
And now, what about people that run in livestock?
Is that a different type of auction?
Have you ever done that?
Totally different.
You sell them by the pound.
Yeah, okay.
Completely different.
You're selling the livestock by the pound.
It's totally, totally different.
And y'all have beef with those people?
I mean, literally, almost like a bunch of people.
We have good friends that own livestock auctions.
Oh, they do both.
You know what I mean?
And they'll do both.
There's livestock auctions all throughout the week.
But, for example, a friend of mine that owns one in Gonzalez, Texas, his is on Saturday, and he works three or four sales during the week, car sales during the week, and then does that on the weekend.
But that's a totally, totally different, I mean, it's totally different.
I don't know this.
And that's for mating, you know?
Like, you know, somebody you can sell a Dodge Ram and then to sell a Ram if you want.
That'd be cool.
But I think the benefit of that, why I would like to buy something from there, I think is you can mate it, you know?
And not you, but you can have it mate with something else.
Like, it'd be cool if you could have a couple cars mate.
Yeah.
You know, you go park them somewhere in a garage for the weekend and you come back.
A little baby car.
Yeah, a little baby car scoots out.
It'd be cool, wouldn't it?
Yeah.
I worked a livestock auction with him one time.
And so he's up on the block.
Okay.
And then the chute is like down around him, like a U-shaped U. Right.
And the cattle are coming in, and I'm on the side where the cattle's coming in.
Well, this great big Brahma bull, I mean, 1,800, 2,000 pounds.
I mean, he's pissed.
He wants out of there.
And this 70-year-old man is holding up this gate.
And I'm like watching.
And, you know, I'm not a cowboy in any way, shape, or form.
And so I'm watching.
I'm like, man, I'm going to watch this old man die right here in front of me.
Well, that old man jumps out of the way and out comes that bull and takes dead ass aim at me.
No.
And I'm running through the arena trying to get away from him.
All these cowboys are looking at me.
Yeah, and I finally got locked up in the office and then cowboys came and got that cow.
And man, I was so scared.
God, I mean, he took dead aim for my ass.
That's the worst when you think somebody else is about to get it and then suddenly you're about to get it.
that's a big shift.
Locked in on them.
That's a big shift in the head.
Is there any good jokes you use when you're up there?
Is it kind of like that, or is it all business?
Sometimes you can be all right on it.
We joke.
No, we joke.
All the time.
All day.
You know, for instance, I had a car dealer that we have a really good relationship with.
And, you know, I was selling a car and it was on a red light, which is as is.
Yeah, we had one of those, dude.
You know, and I told him, I said, come on, man.
We had an as-is.
It was missing a passenger seat for that story.
So I told him, I said, come on, man, be like your wife.
Take a chance.
Yeah, there's some good jokes.
Most of them are just kind of like improv.
Yeah, just short.
Yeah, short, one-liners.
Jabs.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, jabs at the dealers.
Dude, my favorite joke I ever heard.
It's a little profane, but it's, what's the last thing you want to hear when you're giving a blowjob to Willie Nelson?
Well, I'm not Willie Nelson.
That's my favorite joke ever.
It's not my joke.
But God, it's good.
I mean, it's just a good joke, man.
We got one more that came in for you guys, man.
Have you ever been caught raising the bid on an item without any active bidders to reach the reserve?
And if so, how did you handle that situation?
Price of value does happen.
He's got a little inside track there.
Does he?
Yes.
You know that man?
No.
He's bargaining.
Our job is to get it to the reserve.
And we try to make that look as good as possible.
And what is the reserve?
It's like what the seller wants for the vehicle to actually sell.
Okay, so if it doesn't meet the reserve, it doesn't have to sell.
Yeah, we can put it on call or we just no-sell it.
Okay.
And so, I mean, at the end of the day, our job is to get it there, right?
So the least no-sales you have at the end of the day, the better.
Correct.
Okay.
Yeah, correct.
So sometimes you might let that extra 100 slip up there, huh?
Yeah.
Sometimes.
You got to do what you got to do.
Right.
But, you know, if something, if they stop bidding or whatever, then we just explain to them, hey, it takes X amount of dollars.
Yeah, a lot of times we'll just stop and tell them, hey, this is what it takes to buy.
Yeah, it's what it takes to buy it.
And if they can, you know, meet somewhere in the middle or we'll figure it out, get it closer, put it on a call.
But really, we want to sell it right there.
Yeah, I mean, you can't have a guy have a damn seizure in the front row and he wakes up and owns four Volkswagens.
You know what I mean?
You got to.
Let's hear some of your calls.
Peggy, can we hear one?
Yeah, two grand minutes on 20 million mama.
Two under the random now.
Three under the right now.
Four in the random now.
Five, five, five, now.
Five under the random now.
Six under now.
Seven under the random now.
Eight under the ring now.
Nine under the random now.
Three thousand the round.
It's so much better.
Like I have videos.
If y'all want to watch videos, I mean, to me, it's so much better when it's live and it's and it's with speakers.
Yeah, with speakers.
Oh, I bet.
Do we have one of those?
All right, here we got a video right here.
Let's check this out.
So Cameron, take us into what you're doing here before we start it.
So this was, I think, pre-COVID.
No.
Yeah, pre-COVID.
And the screen behind you is the picture of the car.
The guy to my right is the rep.
So he's going to be representing the seller of the vehicle.
Okay.
And then that's pretty much it.
All right.
And then there's a screen.
You went from one car and started on another one there?
I'm right here.
Another car.
So go back.
When you hit 375, you start on a new car.
Yeah, 375 was the buyer number.
And then I'm on a new one right now.
Okay.
Yeah.
And so So I'm announcing the announcements right there.
What's wrong with it?
Oh, okay.
I still say it has this or this?
Yeah.
That's a lot of fun.
That's awesome, man.
So that's it.
You just sit there and keep it cruising, huh?
Yeah, just cruise around.
And with that safety vest on, what do you have to have?
Yeah, that's a bigger corporate auction right there.
They're big into safety.
And so cars are driving through the lanes.
And so they just don't want to get hit.
So if you work at the auction or if you're an auctioneer, you got to have the safety vest on just in case you get off the block and you're walking, you know, they go to the bathroom.
They want the driver's.
You're the money mouth.
They got to keep you healthy.
Yeah.
Right.
There you go.
All right.
What do we got here?
Here's another video.
Now, this section, what's going on here?
I'm selling new car trades, new car trade-ins or frontline old age units.
Oh, yeah.
Right there.
That's my nickname.
This is actually in the valley.
This is in McAllen, Texas.
Okay.
And I couldn't really tell you until he starts the video.
Okay.
That's old Jay Klong.
Shout out.
Shout out.
I'm fishing for money.
You are.
And where are you looking?
Where are the people sitting?
You see all those people right there underneath those flags?
Yeah.
Those are all car dealers.
Those are all buyers.
Okay.
And when I said Detroit, he's beating up on us today.
Those were two corporate buyers for a big corporate car lots.
And I was joking with them.
And I was telling my friend Detroit that the other buyer was beating up on us today.
I see.
And so these are the different lanes right here I'm seeing?
Yes, like I'm sitting, like you can see my block right there where that play button is.
The car's right in front of me.
And then you see another auctioneer right across the other lane.
And you see his clerk.
And the car in front of him.
And the car in front of him.
So each of you guys, so he does that car, you're doing this Car, do you go back and forth?
No, we're both going at the same time.
Oh, really?
Yeah, there's like a sound wall, so it's all loud, but once you step into a lane, you can hear primarily that auction.
And then behind me, there's two more other lanes going as well.
Wow.
So there's a sound wall between you and that guy.
Yeah.
Okay.
You see where that says caution?
Yeah.
Like right up above that is a great big wall that separates the two lanes.
I see.
That's where the speakers are, too.
They're way up there.
Yeah.
The speakers are up there.
In the reactors.
I see.
That actually at that auction, what that caution sign is hanging on are AC ducks.
Amen.
Yeah.
Yeah, I like that cool there.
Cool, man.
So I'm trying to think if there's anything else, man.
I really feel like I understand a little bit more about the world.
I understand that some of it's kind of a family, not a family business, but are a lot of other people that are in the business, they have a family member in it.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
It really is, huh?
Yeah.
Especially in the auto side, primarily.
Yeah.
I would say so.
Most definitely.
All my auction buddies, like the video he just showed them, Peyton Crowe, his brother's in it.
And then you got their dad, there's in it.
And then that guy that was working the ring for me that he said Jake Long, his dad is a state world champion auctioneer.
Really?
Yeah.
Now, did any of you guys ever get into the competitions or what's that like?
Not too much, man.
I did one time when we were in Waco.
I have never, ever, ever had any desire to do any competitions.
And what is it like the competition?
Take me through some of it.
It's not, it's, in my personal opinion, it's not based or judged off what we do on a daily basis because you only get three cars.
You only get to sell three cars.
And you could get the wrong three cars.
You could get the right three cars.
You could not be, you know, it takes more than three cars to warm up.
Right.
So it's too subjective or objective.
I don't know which one, but it's the one that's not good.
Yeah, that one.
Yeah.
It's just never been for me.
Totally.
And just so what is it like?
Not even that you really, I mean, obviously you just kind of checked it out to see what it was like, but what is that competition?
Like, what is it, if I'm at a thing, what is it?
Yeah, so they have an auctioneer competition.
This is for automobiles, but they have other ones too.
They have state, and this one would be the world automobile.
Automobile auctioneer.
Yeah, and so they have that.
They have a ringman competition.
I was 18. I competed in the ringman.
I think I got like 11th place.
Wow.
So the ringman?
You're competing with letting the auctioneer know.
Yeah, with the other ringmen.
Yeah, with the other ringmen.
And then there's an auctioneer competition.
I think it was supposed to be in Texas.
Yeah, there's a team deal, too.
They're supposed to be in Texas.
And COVID came last year, and I was actually going to compete in it because it was coming to Texas.
I think if it comes back to Texas, I'll probably compete.
But other than that, I don't know.
Is it fun, though?
Yeah, it can be.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's a rush, for sure.
Right.
Yeah.
I mean, look, a lot of those, a lot of comp, when you get into a competition, same as comic.
It's just different.
I have friends over on Last Comic Standing that are better comedians than the friends that have won it.
Right, same deal.
Yeah.
So it is what it is.
Right.
It's hard to get into a competition about something like that.
Right, right.
Damn, I wonder, has there ever been a movie about auctioneers?
There needs to be.
I think it'd be great.
There needs to be a show or something.
Who was the fellow that had trouble with the drinking?
What was his name?
Let's call him John.
Okay, that's fine.
Yeah, I didn't mean to call him out.
I'm just thinking if it's a neat name.
You make me think about a movie character.
No, but he would be a great movie.
Yeah.
He really is.
You ever seen that movie, The Goods?
It's about that car dealer.
I think it's...
Uh-uh.
Man, it's good.
It's good?
Yeah, it's a car dealer movie.
I mean, that's the type of guy that went to jail on his wedding day.
Amen.
I mean, he got married and went to jail.
Yeah, that one right there with that guy.
Went to jail now.
Yeah, he's a car dealer.
It's a hilarious movie.
I think I have seen that movie.
It's a hilarious movie.
Jeremy Piven.
That's hilarious.
I did comedy with him the other night.
Really?
Yeah.
He's funny.
He's a talented, talented man.
He's funny.
Interesting.
I'm going to have to see this movie.
Yeah, it's good.
It's not about auctions, but it's about car dealers and about selling cars.
Yeah, about car dealers selling cars.
You know what's funny is, Yeah.
He did a really good job in that movie, for sure.
I'll check it out.
But yeah, there should be an auctioneer movie.
That would be funny.
Yeah, I feel like it's.
I don't know.
It would be funny, but yeah.
I feel like we're really missing that.
So we do something here.
First of all, thank you guys for coming in, man.
Thank you for having us.
It's really interesting to learn about your trade.
And we do a thing here where we do something for single miles where we reach out to a single mom and just kind of just grant them a small financial amount to just go do something fun with their kiddo, you know?
So we have a woman.
You guys have a friend of a friend, right?
Right.
And she raises her own, she has a child that she raises?
Yeah, two kids.
Oh, nice.
Two kids in Wax Ahatchee, Texas.
Wax Ahatchee, huh?
Yes.
Dang.
Okay.
Well, look, man, I've never had my hatchie waxed, but I'd probably be willing to.
It depends.
Hey, Amanda.
Yes, sir.
How are you today, young lady?
Good.
How are you?
Good.
I'm not a creeper or anything like that.
So I'm just calling.
I work on a podcast.
And we do a thing on our podcast where every now and then we reach out to a single mom and we just do something nice for them.
And somebody nominated you.
I'm sitting here with two fine gentlemen right here who are auctioneers, actually.
Okay.
And they're from San Marcos, Texas.
And we just wanted to we wanted to make a just a financial gift to you so you could go do something fun with your kiddos this summer.
What?
Yep.
That's all we wanted to do.
Just let you know that somebody's thinking of you.
That's really sweet.
Oh, well.
You're going to make me cry.
Well, I was raised by a single mom, and I know sometimes it gets a little tough.
And not that it gets tough, but just, you know, we all want to know that people are thinking of us sometimes when we don't know that, you know?
So what do your kiddos like to do?
Well, my son plays baseball, and my daughter tries to Play on his team, too, but we do sports.
That's title nine right there, baby.
I know.
We do ball a lot.
I teach.
We're always together.
We try to do things on the weekend, go to my aunts to go swimming, but there's not too much we do just being me.
So it's a lot of work.
Yeah, it is a lot of work sometimes.
Well, we want to do something.
I'm sitting here with some auctioneers, so I figured I would just kind of like, I'm going to have them just help me raise the amount of money that we give to you so you can go do something fun.
So they're professional, so I'm going to let these dudes start off the bidding, and then I'll raise it.
I'll be the only raiser.
Yeah, 100.
I get up, I get 100.
I get up, I got a theo.
Now two, back it up, I got a 200, now two and a three and a four.
Yeah, four, back it up, I get a five, now six, I get up, I get a six hundred, Theo, yeah, six, seven, they get up, I get a seven, they get up against eight, they get up again, they get up again, nine thousand, yeah thousand dollar one thousand, Theo, make it even here thousand, they get up at eleven, they get up again all in, all done.
I have salt thousand dollar to buy our number, Theo.
Yep, there you go.
So we just did it.
Oh my gosh, I'm so thankful.
Oh, you're welcome.
It's nothing, it's not about the finances or anything.
It's really just about, we just wanted to let you know that people care about you and that, you know, it's nice to know that.
That's really nice to know.
That's hard because it's hard for me to take compliments or anything because it's me always putting everything out there.
It's hard sometimes when we got to do everything, you know, it's hard.
It's really hard.
I know.
And sometimes when I have to be like that, man, I feel like, and then it's hard for me to accept help from others, you know, I'm just, because I don't want to show that side of myself that shows that I need help, you know?
I really try to be independent, but inside I show face, but inside it's really hard.
Yeah.
I don't ask for help and I don't expect any help.
I try to do everything on my own, but it's hard.
Well, you're doing a good job.
You know, I want to let you know that.
And yeah, just let you know that people love you and are thinking about you behind your back.
I know sometimes it's, you know, we don't know that.
And that's true for you.
So just wanted to let you know that.
And that's it.
You know, and happy belated Mother's Day.
And yeah, y'all go do something fun with those rascals, you know?
We will, for sure.
Yeah.
Okay.
Thank you so much for your time today.
Have a good day.
Thank you, you two.
Thank y'all so much.
You're welcome.
You're very welcome.
Thank you.
Okay.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
Oh, that's nice, man.
Oh, yeah.
That was nice.
That's cool.
Yeah.
Cool stuff.
Yeah, man.
I don't know.
There's something that we all want to know that people are thinking about us, you know?
For sure.
It's important.
Or at least I want to.
You know, I think we all do in some way.
Oh, yeah.
So thank you guys for nominating her.
That's awesome.
You said she lost her husband, huh?
Hey.
I think last year.
And that's your wife's aunt's sister?
No.
Ashley's aunt's good friend.
Good friend.
Oh, well, that's awesome, man.
Yeah, we're happy to be able to help out.
And we're grateful for you guys coming in today, man, and just being a part of our lives and just helping us learn about auctioning.
Yeah.
You know, if I ever want to get rid of something, dude.
Yeah.
If I want to get rid of someone, I'll call a hitman, but I'll get rid of something.
Call an auctioneer.
Yeah, fast.
Fast, baby.
Fast, baby.
Yeah, that's the kid.
Cam, Spanky.
Thank you guys so much.
Thank you.
Thank you for having us.
Yep, man, you bet.
Let's get one more call on the way out, all right?
All right.
Cam, can you take us out?
Yep, 20 grand.
I get up.
I get a 20. Now, two.
Back it up.
I get a 20,000, now 2 to 4. Back it up.
I get a 68. I get up.
I get a 21,000, not a 21. Yep, 21. Now two.
Back it up.
I get a 4.6.
I get up.
I get a 8. I get up.
I get a 21. 8. I get up.
I get a.
All done.
I have a get up.
I get a 216 buyer number 123.
So.
Now I'm just floating on the breeze.
And I feel I'm falling like these leaves.
I must be cornerstone.
Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this piece of my life out.
I can feel it in my bones.
But it's gonna take a little time for me to set that parking break and let myself on my shine.
Find that light on me I'll sit and tell you my stories Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you
Now I've been moving way too fast on the runaway train with a heavy load of my past.
And these wheels that I've been riding on, they're walls so thin that they're damn near gone.
I guess now they just were built to land.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite and welcome to Kite Club, a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure your partner.
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