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And I'm going to grow out my, you know, I'm going to grow out my fro or I'm going to grow out my le.
Or, you know, if you're white, you only can do a fro around your wiener, around your kind of thighs or something.
Or a lot of men get that rear butt fro at the baseline of each butt cheek.
They'll have a strong real isthmus of hair right there.
And you could, because sometimes you'll see a man at the gym or something, and I don't see a lot of those men because I don't look at them, but every now and then, you know, my phone will run out of power, and so I'll have to look at other stuff in the gym.
And you'll see a man in there whose backside is all wet, and he have a lot of, it almost looks like his butt looks like two closed eyes, and there's a ton of hair right there at the bottom look like, you know, like eyelashes.
Because, you know, almost coming off of the closed eyes of, you know, his butt cheeks.
Each one look like a closed eye of his butt cheeks.
And you see they got a lot of hair right there on a man sometimes.
But it's interesting that that, yeah, but yeah, they just got too many too many different things.
It's Movember.
You can't shave your buddy.
You can't do this.
You got a mustache.
You know, there's just too many of them.
I can't name them right now for some reason, but there's just too many different.
And it's always for something, you know?
It's like, oh, we're, you know, we're not going to open our eyes.
It's like it's Dark Vember.
You know, and for two weeks, we're not going to open our eyes.
And we're raising money for, you know, for blind people or something.
You're like, I'm not doing all of that shit.
You know, I got to ride my bike to work.
I'm not doing it with my eyes closed.
So you can eat a can of straight up street side ass meat if you're thinking about that.
But what's happening?
Yeah, it's November.
We're getting into it.
We're getting into it.
It's never too late to come over.
It's never too late.
A real beauty about life, you get these, you know, they, you just get the, the next day comes around and you get that fresh opportunity.
You know, it's like the powers that be the existence, you know, it's like life just every day opens up that fresh can of hot fish right there for you.
Say, here you go again.
Speaking of fish, I was, I did Halloween.
I went to a get-together and I had a, you know, I ended up going with like a newsy costume.
I did it last year, like a newspaper boy.
Dude, think about newspaper boys.
Like it used to be when I was young, somebody had a paper route.
You'd see some little kid, you know, somebody, this guy, you know, Fat Samuel, somebody, little Daniel out there smoking a cigarette.
And you'd get a paper route and somebody would ride their bike in the morning and throw papers out.
And my mother used to do it.
Our mother used to deliver newspapers and magazines and still does some, but this was, you know, she was real regular at it.
But they'd have children would do it.
And it was even before my time where you would hear a lot of children would get out and do a paper route.
Think about that.
You're 11 years old.
It's 5.30 in the morning.
You out there slinging the sports section at somebody.
Nowadays, you can't get one of these little assholes to freaking make, you know, to make his own, to make a salad for himself.
Dude, you could lock a kid in a cage with a whole thing of salad mix with a bag of spring mix and a hat full of peppercorns and whatever, black olives, and he would fuck it up.
I mean, these kids, I don't know.
I don't even know.
Some of them are more like animals, more, you know, I bet they would test, if you tested them, they would test more as animals, some of them.
Some of the youth.
But anyway, speaking of fish, so I'm out there.
I go to the traffic was so bad on Sunset Boulevard that I'm leaving.
I'm leaving.
I stopped by the comedy store.
And I'm leaving and traffic was so bad.
It was just going nowhere.
And, you know, just groups of people walking by, costumes.
So two of my buddies are on a street corner by the Viper room.
And so I pull off there on sunset.
I park and we walk down to Santa Monica Boulevard.
And that's where it's real, I mean, it gets real homoerotic down there.
And it's really a, it's kind of like the Mississippi River for like gay men, but it's not a river.
It's just a street.
And so they got, you know, everybody's just popping and locking.
And they have, but during Halloween, it's a big festival.
It's a big, like everybody's, all types of people are out there, costumes, everybody, and it's, and everybody's welcome and stuff.
It's just, it's, you know, it's kind of like, it's kind of, it's more, it's more like they block off the street, block party.
So they block the street off, and then I, so I'm walking with two of my buddies.
We're going to go maybe walk into a bar.
They're meeting some ladies over at a spot.
Dude, we get probably half a block down the boulevard, and they got a young fellow over there dressed as, and this guy might have been kind of like maybe Filipino or maybe light Mexican.
Or he could have been actually, you know, we had a group of people growing by us, the Swansons, and they lived by like a real smoky area.
And so they weren't, they were white, but they was real smoked.
So if you didn't think they were, and sometimes people would, you know, lob a little, lob a couple, couple little slurs at them, you know, and they'd just be like, oh, no, it's just smoke.
You know, we got just some smoke on us.
But this boy had dressed up like Ariel, you know, from not like the Ariel Nation or whatever, but like the Ariel, that water ginger, bro.
You know what I'm talking about?
Ariel from Little Mermaids.
So this guy was a mermaid, this little guy.
And he was kind of, he looked more like a trout to me.
I think he was a little bit more, he was kind of Ruben-esque.
But his buddies, I guess some friends had been carrying him, and they got pissed at him and set him down.
So this dude's just screaming.
He's just yelling for somebody named Jesse to come back and pick him up.
And that was just one of the most traumatic things I've ever seen.
And I'm that catch and release guy.
If it ain't season, you know, I don't know how many mermaids you're allowed to keep, but I said, damn, they got to throw this boy back, man.
Because they had just laid this young buck right out there.
And this dude was just floundering.
And you could tell, and he was, at that point, he was kind of, he would reach at men's legs when they walked by.
Like he was just looking for any man that just put him in his little, in his boat.
And he just, you know, he was just like finding hemo.
Like he was just looking for any he that would be around.
But that was probably the most craziest thing really that I saw was just a man that was abandoned that had dressed up like Ariel from the damn whatever.
Little mermaids.
But that's it.
That's what happened.
What else did I do?
Did I do anything real crazy?
I watched the fights.
I watched the fights, man.
And I thought, dude, I watched the Till Gastolum fight.
I couldn't believe that they didn't really fight.
I was like, what's going on?
It's almost like they'd signed a treaty or something before the fight and didn't tell anybody.
And Darren Till, if you look at him, he looks like the mask from Scream, if you notice that, when you see him just facially.
He's starting to really look like the Scream mask.
He looks like a piece of like Vincent Van Gogh art if you look at him.
But I respect the guy.
I think it's really hard to probably go to another country and live there.
I don't know.
I think Darren Till lives here and fight or just to go to another country and fight.
That just seems real intense to me.
But I was hoping that Gaslin would win that one.
I didn't understand why they didn't get into it.
What else, man?
We got a lot of other stuff.
I'm going to actually, we'll have Nick come in because he likes to talk about the fights.
And then I'll get into some other things.
And we'll go over a little bit of news and then I'll get into some questions.
But it's, you know, this is a special time of year when we have, you know, when it is, you can kind of recalibrate, I think, November or Brovember, whatever it is, a time for you to, you know, finally admit your neighbor that you guys are family, you guys are brothers.
Or to hug a brother, you know.
Find a black friend and hug him.
Tell him you love him, bro.
It's Brovember.
You know, or Grovember.
If you're 11 years old, dude, it's Grovember.
And you might be, you could be, you could maybe grow an inch if you try real hard this month.
November's just that month that it's just like, come on, come on in.
It doesn't matter what's been happening.
Come on in.
Because we got the holidays and everybody's welcome.
And that's a beautiful thing about November.
I'll tell you this.
The show's almost sold out there in Lafayette, Louisiana, and that is going to be in December 26th at the Heyman Center.
And that beautiful thing's almost sold out with proceeds to benefit Dustin Poirier's Good Fight Foundation.
And Dustin's going to come out.
It's going to be a fun time.
And then what else?
Oh, I've got the shows coming up.
You know, in Manchester, they still have tickets available for Manchester in January in the UK.
And also for Sweden and Stockholm and Norway, Oslo and Stockholm.
I think everything else on the European tour is sold out.
December 10th, I'll be in Los Angeles at the Wiltern downtown.
And those tickets are all available online at theovan.com slash tour.
And some new dates.
we do have some new dates.
They're not, I'll They got that magic place Toronto is finally going to be on.
And we're going to get the Maryland and Sayersville.
And then we're hoping to shoot a comedy special.
We don't have a buyer for it yet.
People are always saying, when are you going to do a special?
Yeah, I don't know.
You know, I mean, I'm always going to be returning new material.
I mean, the dark arts tour is different.
Half of it's different now than when it started.
So it's always going to be, the ball is always going to be rolling.
And I think we'll, you know, we'll get some offers.
It's just a matter of, you know, where, you know, is it something that's fair?
And then where do you put it?
If not, then you just, you, you get some of the clips and you get it and you do it on YouTube or put it, I don't know.
But, you know, we figure it out.
But I think we'll get some options for a special because people are always asking me, it's not up to me.
You know, it's not up to me.
But nothing's ever really come easy for me in this business.
And I don't intend.
I'd almost be silly if I expected it to.
So, but what else, man?
What else is cracking?
My hair is coming in good.
You know, I got them.
They call me Buster Plugless, bro, because I got those hairs, those baby.
That damn second line, that infantry.
I got them reinforcements up top.
And some of them, they're real little.
You can almost see them just kind of.
You can almost touch them a little.
They're so little, man.
They just...
You almost don't want to have somebody see you touching them because they're just so damn young, you know?
It just seems like you just...
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You know, when I left the other night, my buddies, they wanted to go to the bar or something and do, they were meeting some chicks and it just seemed like some real thoughts out there.
And I said, I'm out of here, bruh.
Somebody abandoned this little mermaid over here.
And they had the craziest costumes.
I mean, some of it wasn't even, you know, one guy was just crying.
They had a girl.
She had, she looked, her thing was Bernie Sanders, but it was, she had lit the back of her, her back of her suit was on fire.
And that shit gets me, man.
Why are you going to burn yourself for a pun?
That's a big, I ain't burning myself.
You know, if I was going to be Bernadette Wilson or somebody or whoever did the American flag, I wouldn't fucking light myself on fire so people could understand it or whatever.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Do I ever know?
Let's get Nick in here.
We got some calls and we're going to talk to him a little bit about the fights and a little bit about some news and just to change the vibe up a little.
We'll just change it up today.
And it's that time of year too to be inclusive and just include people in what's going on.
You know, if you usually just go do something by yourself, have somebody meet you.
You know, recently I haven't been wanting to do that much stuff sometimes.
And so instead I'll have somebody meet me there.
Oh, meet me.
That way I have to go do it.
Oh, then meet me at the gym.
That way I have to be there.
Just makes it a little bit more accountable for myself.
Because I'm the guy, a lot of times I won't do something for me, but if somebody else is included, I'll do something for somebody else.
So I'll meet them there.
And then it benefits me too because it gets me going.
All right.
Let's get Nick in here.
What's up, Nick?
What's going on?
Not much, man.
Did you watch the fights?
You know I did.
I know you did, huh?
That was a trick question, guys.
What is it?
It's not a trick question.
If I know you know it, that's a rhetorical.
What'd you think, man?
What'd you think first of that Gastolem Till fight?
It was pretty boring, I thought, to be honest.
I thought, yeah, I don't know.
I thought they'd both be more aggressive.
But Darren Till was saying some things after the fight, like he was not in a great headspace and was thinking about trying to make excuses to get out of the fight.
So that's why he was kind of tentative.
But he said he kind of settled in the whole time and he made good points.
Gaslam didn't touch him, even though he wasn't super aggressive.
He dominated that fight, even though it wasn't the most exciting.
Yeah, I thought it was just interesting.
I don't know enough about fighting to know, is there times where the guys, where it's just a bad matchup and they don't, like their styles, they just never find ways to really combat each other?
Because those guys, I mean, I've seen like square dance, and I've seen aggressive square dancing that was kind of harder.
Yeah, I think that is what you said.
It's just sometimes people's stylistic matchups keep them from having, because both those guys have had just bangers of the fight.
Like Kelvin Gaslam and Israel Adesanya had maybe the fight of the year.
Unbelievable.
Yeah, that's when I was at that Poirier fight, and that thing was insane.
That thing was insane watching them do that.
So I was expecting, I guess I was coming off the high of some of those fireworks, expecting some of that out of them.
And then Darren Till, you know, he needed a win.
I mean, he's lost a couple, like two of his last four or something, I think.
So he really needed a win.
It just seemed, I don't know.
There was even a couple times where it was like, was Till even going to strike him whenever he looked kind of like he could have.
That one time when Gaslam fell against the cage.
Yeah, yeah.
And he didn't even swing at his head.
I think he just knew he was kind of ahead and dominating and got kind of really complacent.
I mean, it's still a huge statement for him because it was his first fight at 185 at that weight class.
And Gaslam was like top five.
So still a way to open up in that division.
But I agree it wasn't the most exciting fight.
Yeah, and I wonder why Gas, I don't know if he kind of waits for the fight to come to him.
Maybe he does a little bit.
He's so short and doesn't have a very long reach.
So he really has to close the distance really fast and get in there.
And maybe once he knew Till had his number and was just keeping him away from closing that distance, he just got, he started to sit back and wait too.
I thought he tried to grapple more, to be honest.
But I don't know if Till seemed really strong and got up a couple times he did get taken down right away.
Yeah, Gaslam's kind of like that violent armadillo a little bit.
You know, you think they're not going to do much whenever you get close.
You know, armadillos can jump really high.
I was not aware.
People don't know that.
And a lot of times they die.
They get hit by cars because the car would go over them.
But when the car gets close, it kind of reacts and jumps and then the grill of the car hits it.
So that's how a lot of armadillos meet their maker.
What else?
What else?
What else about the fight?
Oh, the finale.
The main event.
I thought it lived up to the hype.
It was like the stoppage was a little premature.
I would have loved to see it.
It did seem like Nate was picking up in those last two rounds, and it would have been exciting to see what happens.
But they released the scorecards, and the judges had Jorge, all three judges had him winning all three of the first rounds.
So the only chance Nate had of winning was to stop him.
And I don't know if that would have happened.
Oh, I see.
Now, and the fighters, they know that.
They know that at a certain point, they have to know.
That's part of probably doing it.
It's like the first couple of rounds.
If I'm not going to win on the cards, the only way I can win is a knockout.
Yeah, yeah.
And usually good corners will tell them, be straight with them, like you're down.
You got to go for it.
So it definitely would have picked up the pace.
And I think everybody wanted to see the full fight.
Yeah.
Yeah.
At first I was pissed.
I was furious.
I'm like, they let this dude, little nerd alert guy in there.
Some fucking little statistics juggler.
And this dude, I mean, it seemed like they could have stitched him up right there, I guess, but I guess it's just at first I was upset, and then I was like, once you kind of really saw his face, you're like, oh, man.
Yeah, that could be superb damage, I guess.
But, I mean, what's he got to lose?
His face is...
Yeah.
Yeah, he doesn't seem like he cares if he has a face or not.
Yeah.
His entire face so far is scar tissue.
So what's like a little bit more, he's just going to have a really bad scar again.
Dude, he had a dang, I mean, he had like a couple vaginas around his eye.
I mean, this guy had really, I mean, this guy had given him real gender identification issues around his eye.
You know, like I've gotten pink eye from some things, but I've never had that bad a pink eye.
Where it's like two, like he built a vagina on the top of his eye and built one on the bottom.
I thought it was dead.
It looked, yeah, because after, if he gets hit again, I mean, maybe this is part of his face just falls off, I guess.
I think that might be next.
Yeah, it was, it was nasty.
It was pretty graphic.
Let's get into some news, man.
What happened in the news this weekend?
In some local news, in the comedy store parking lot, Bobby Lee hit Sam Tripoli's car after he got out of his car while it was still in drive.
Yes.
Were you there for that?
I just gotten there.
So I was actually in my car when that happened.
Thank God, because obviously it's not safe when Bobby.
And this isn't a, you know, people try to say it's an Asian thing, this or that.
It's not.
First of all, I'll be very honest.
Bobby plays Candy Crush while he drives his vehicle.
He got stopped by a cop one time.
He told the cop it was a Tesla.
It is not a Tesla, that it was self-driving.
It's not self-driving.
You will see him literally moving forward and just playing Candy Crush.
And it's very, I think, off-putting.
So I'm not shocked that he hit Sam's car.
And here's the crazy part.
Sam hadn't been to the comedy store in a long time.
And he was just kind of taking a little bit of break.
He pulls in and fucking Bobby dinged him, bro.
And it seems to be kind of the go-to move for a lot of Korean drivers.
Hit somebody with their car.
I got hit by a guy.
Kim Yum, I think was the guy's name.
Dude, and also here's the thing.
His car had been hit 400 times.
It wasn't even a car.
It was a hit.
It was just a hit.
It was like a moving hit that in like a former life had been a vehicle.
It had no rearview mirrors left on it.
It had in the inside, he taped like a house, like a mirror you would see at a barber, like one you handheld.
He taped that to the fucking inside middle.
And they found that it was my fault for him hitting my car door.
I think I remember that.
He got out of the car and tried to embrace you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He could barely find me too.
I'm like, I'm right here, dude.
That guy should not be driving.
That guy basically was just, I don't even know what you call that when you're just moving forward, but you're not really like fully existent.
That guy was really just like a ghost almost.
What else we got?
The Indian capital of Delhi declared a pollution emergency for toxic levels of smog.
The government was handing out millions of masks, and flight operations at the airport have been hampered because of low visibility.
I don't know if you saw any of the videos of it, but it looked like, I don't know, it looked like a grapes of wrath, like dust storm.
You couldn't see anything.
And that's just the air.
There you go, guys.
So, you know, what's a layover because of this or that?
I mean, these guys, dude, India, there's so many people.
There's so many people.
Even if you don't have a family, you have a family.
There's like people living in your house.
You'll open a cupboard and there's a family in there.
You know, there's family.
Everybody, some people build their house out of other people and they'll just sleep like in between them.
I remember being in India one time and they had people at night sleeping on the side of the interstate, like on the wall.
Like the interstate.
Like imagine you're on, you know, I-10 or I-12 or I-55 and there's just people just sleeping right on the side of it.
It just blew my mind.
That's crazy.
I mean, just somewhat small.
Damn.
What else we got?
See, a 37th horse died at Santa Anita Park right here in California after sustaining a leg injury during the last day of the Breeders' Cup.
It was a four-year-old thoroughbred named Mongolian Groom, and it suffered a serious fracture and was later euthanized.
But yeah, it's becoming quite the epidemic at Santa Anita Racetrack.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's really, it's almost kind of become like a real chop shop for horses and horsery and that sort of thing.
I wonder what the deal is.
I wonder if there's just like a little bump out the gate or something.
But I wonder if somebody over there is doping them if they got some kind of horse dexter kind of milling around over there.
I think that's pretty likely.
Because you'd have to think once 30, you know, 32 horses die, anybody's ball game.
37 horses die, bro, we got a problem.
And that's just in one year?
No, no, that's like ever at the track.
But it, I mean, the last one was just like less than a week ago.
And yeah, it just keeps happening.
I feel like there's going to be a big backlash against horse racing pretty soon.
Like there already was against SeaWorld.
Like I feel like there's going to be like a documentary about horse racing like Blackfish pretty soon because.
Well, Blackfish is racial, too.
I guess it's like, yeah, they had one blackfish and this is how they treated it.
Have you seen that?
I never.
Oh, it's heartbreaking.
But I didn't.
I don't think I watched all of it, but I watched enough to get the point.
Jesus.
Yeah, well, it almost makes you not want to go there and really bet on them if you're like, oh, these guys are dying.
They're not treating them well.
They're not giving them vitamins.
And it also makes you wonder if there's a bigger conspiracy where it's like, oh, let's send some sick horses out here to start to get the vibe out there that we don't want to do this anymore.
That could be it.
But you go to other places, bro.
They got, you know, they got just getting horse racing.
You know, you go to some countries, it's like they're just getting like, they'll race anything out there.
Sheep, you know, lamb.
They got a thing, I think, in Louisiana, too, where sometimes at the rodeo, they'll tie like a kid to a lamb or something and run him out there.
It's beautiful.
You know, they got like an 18-month-old, and then they said, like, a lamb just at the speed of lightning.
What else we got here?
It says McDonald's.
Yeah, the McDonald's CEO, Steve Easterbrook, was forced to leave the company over what was called a consensual relationship with an employee.
They have yet to name the employee.
But yeah, he had to step down.
He said, this was a mistake.
Given the values of the company, I agree with the board that it's time for me to move on.
The values of the company?
Dude, if you can't fuck somebody at a fast food shop, who can you fuck anymore?
That's what I don't like.
I don't like this big, you know, I don't like, you know, people making feel bad for sex.
This man works at a McDonald's.
You know, first of all, you know how hard it is to work at a McDonald's, get off work and still want to fuck someone?
Very hard.
I mean, can you imagine?
Even the diet that they're on probably doesn't even lead to healthy sexual organ, you know, upkeep.
This is just baffling, man.
And it's just so it's like most people met at work.
Most of our parents met each other at work.
You have to meet somebody somewhere.
You can't even fuck somebody because both y'all, you know, filled out resumes at the same building.
Sometimes it's just, I mean, does it say that he was like abusing the person or anything?
No, it sounded, like it said, consensual.
I don't know what the deal was.
Given the values of the company, they have fucking grimace, bro.
They have purple.
They have the clown.
Ronald McDonald's a clown.
They're using a clown to sell fucking fat to children.
I don't think they have a lot of companies over there.
Somebody's fucking in the back, bro.
That's honestly the least of my concerns.
I'm way more concerned about the people fist fighting in front of the register that shows up on Twitter every couple of months.
Oh, man.
Go to Wendy's, bro.
Go to the one over there off Lincoln Boulevard.
The doors are missing on it.
They'll let you fuck around there, I bet.
That's it, Nick.
Yeah, that's it.
Slow news week.
Yeah, pretty slow news week, man.
Dead horses.
You can't fuck at McDonald's.
Dude, sometimes, you know, I'll go through the drive-thru at the McDonald's and you almost want to offer to fuck the person who's working in there.
Just to be like, hey, you know, you're not just working at McDonald's.
You're cool.
You're good.
Treat them like a person instead of just someone serving you food.
Yeah.
Yeah, because everybody, especially if you're like a youngster, you roll in, the first thing you do is like fuck with them over the loudspeaker.
Which is almost crazy to have the loudspeaker.
The lady's like 11 feet around the corner.
You have to have this fucking old system.
And they kind of like a little bit of way light gardening over there.
It's just so shady.
And you pick out what you want.
It's so lonely, dude.
I go there at night sometimes on my way home.
God, it makes me sad, man.
Just pulling up and the lady knows me and she's a fucking Patriots fan.
Oh, you back?
That's what she says every time.
Oh, you back.
Undefeated.
That's what she'll say.
All kind of shit like that.
And I'm just sad.
I'm like, don't you think if I fucking had a good life, I would even be here?
I don't care about football right now, but you know, it's 1.40 in the morning.
I'm getting two cheeseburgers and a Sunday.
And I know the machine's broke, but I'm going to fucking order it again.
The machine's always fucking broke, dude.
Oh, man.
Anyway.
Let you get to some calls.
Yeah, man.
I think let me get into some of these calls.
We got some good ones.
Yeah, they're pretty good.
Lots of problems.
Lots of trouble, man.
Need some help.
Are there?
Oh, yeah.
All right.
Always.
We'll get into it, man.
If I need any of your expertise, then we'll holler back at you, Nick.
Happy.
And that's producer Nick Davis there.
Always helping us out, man.
He got works so hard, and I'm grateful to have him put up with me.
All right, let's get to some calls here.
As always, the hotline 985-664-9503.
Hey, B.O., this is Scott in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
What's up, Scott, from over there in Baton Rouge, the Red Stick.
And I'll say this about Baton Rouge.
Never in my life when I was in college had I seen more people get snuck at a bar than in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
I mean, somebody would just be standing there and somebody would come up and just hit them for no damn reason, bruh.
And that's Baton Rouge, bro.
Go Tigers, dude.
Also, the amount of fans who didn't go to college but go to the games blew my mind.
Blew my mind.
Dude, you'd have people in the stands.
They didn't know any other colors except for purple and gold.
And that's just SEC football.
Yeah, people can't read.
You have some dude, he'll be in a bubble.
You know, he have a disease and he'll be in a bubble.
He have an air disease.
But when it's game time, bro, he'll fucking unzip that big bag and fucking come out that bitch.
He'll be out lurking, just taking his chances.
I might die, but I'm going to witness a couple of these first downs.
Move the chains.
All right, let's take the rest of this call.
Thank you for calling Scott.
I want to tell you about this past weekend.
I took my daughter to the Natchez, Mississippi Hot Air Balloon Festival.
Oh, yeah.
And Natchez, Mississippi, up there on the levee, they got one of the most beautiful balloon festivals up there.
And that's just an hour's, you know, that's just a, you know, just a stoner's throw from Baton Rouge onward.
And to see Bishop Gunn perform, it was an immaculate time.
Perfect weather, great atmosphere.
Bishop Gunn was awesome.
Travis and Byrne both came down and gave us some love.
My daughter, she's seven.
She was starstruck, man.
Help me too.
I'd like to thank Bishop Gunn.
I'm a single dad.
It was really cool to share that experience with my daughter.
Hope to see you in Lafayette soon, and we love you, buddy.
Gang.
Gang, bruh.
Gang, man.
Thank you, bro.
It's nice of you to say that.
Yeah, man, it's fun.
You know, I can't imagine what that's like, getting to take your daughter and do something nice like that and something fun.
But good for you for taking that action and doing it.
You know, you're not going to let her have spaces in her brain where you guys don't, where there should be memories, where there should be things that are meaningful.
You know, you're going to fill in her brain with important culk.
You know, and that's important, man.
That's beautiful, dude, to see that.
And I'm glad they could do it.
And I think they have enough, their music, some of it's goofy and like fun enough where, not goofy, but it's the beats are kind of fun enough where if a kid is really vibing into it, I think they could, you know, they could have fun for a little while.
So I'm glad you guys got to do it.
You know, they are, those boys are actually playing in Tipatinas in New Orleans tonight.
And I wish I was going to be there.
But I'll see you over there in Lafayette, man.
And happy early holidays to you and yours.
All right, let's take this call that came in onward.
Hey, Theo, what's up, man?
My name is Dave.
You know, I got two kids now.
One of them is 12, one of them is 8. Okay, bro.
So you took four years off that crotch, huh?
You backed off that hitter, off that little that wallet, bro.
You backed off mom's little sweat wallet for about four years before you made that second batch, huh?
Gang, homeward.
And the 12-year-old, say about eight months ago, you know, she came out of the closet to me and her mother.
The problem is, you know, my mother caught wind of it, you know, my daughter coming out and all.
And she said what were some very hurtful things about my kids.
And then, you know, my wife got into an argument with her and she said some very hurtful things about my wife.
And now, not only have I not talked to my mother in about five months, I've also not talked to my stepfather or, you know, my three brothers in the same time because, you know, when these things happen, it seems like everybody takes a side and everybody took mom duke's side.
I want to know if you had any insight or if any of your other listeners, my fellow listeners, had any insight into how I could go about starting to try to repair these relationships.
Pretty much it, bro.
Hopefully I see you out there when you're on the road.
Gang, bro.
Thanks for the call.
That's a good question.
You know, if you have a, say, your child and 12, you know, and I'm not judging you, I'm just showing from my own experience.
12 seem a little young for a child to know full throttle what kind of nook it is like or what kind of attraction they have but but maybe it's not now maybe children are so ramped up or just advanced that they know what's up i mean i remember i saw a couple middle schoolers making out one time when i was driving two young boys kind of tender kind of gentleman kind of boys and dude i pulled over i said hey guys
you know maybe give it give it two years and see what's up you know just these boys were 11 and they were kissing out there and it's fine but it's just like sometimes it gets they get you know children can just get easily influenced you know you see people doing drug you do drug you see people you know kissing um somebody you kiss somebody you know you see somebody start a fire you start a fire so
but um but look it sounds like you that you have no doubt about uh about you know what your daughter where her sexual laurels lie and that's tough man you know what's tough really is balancing like because like our parents and grandparents especially you get some of their generations things were just different and
i'm not saying that things in their generation were right but for the time they were in they behaved in a way that was fitting or more accepted or sometimes they probably were maybe even afraid like i bet there was a time you know 60 years ago people might have been afraid to say hey i support someone who's gay that might that might have been a fear whereas now it's almost like a fear to say if you were to say i don't support gay people you know people would be more fearful of that so
it's interesting because it's like we don't give people a pass i don't feel like as much as we should on their um on their perspective based on their world you know if somebody grew up in the dark and you trying to tell them about light bulbs and shit they ain't they're gonna tell you to go smoke a fuck you know to smoke half a bowl of your own dick and
that's facts jack because they don't know it and if they come to a party where everybody got the lights on and they shut them all the lights off to them that's going to be normal you know eating cake in the dark is normal to them because that's what they know but now if your mother got if she got now the part that where it's a little you know where it's is when your mother if she
was saying mean stuff that's the thing that's too much really it's just not you know no one should do that to a child especially and and you have to take your child's side you i mean obviously there's no that's the right move it sounds like that you you know you're doing that you know i don't have that experience because you know i've never been a gay man and i've never had a 12 year old child tell me they were gay if a kid told me he was gay man
i would tell him you know well you know it looks fun a lot of gay people have a lot of fun so but don't dress up like damn little mermaid bro if unless you trust your friends not to leave you that dude was just a little roadside trout out there you boy but yeah i think this is a great question maybe some of our listeners have a similar experience yeah it must be it's
just interesting how from like you know times and generations like things you can't even say anymore even if you're just joking to you know things that were just re you know like our grandparents could you know our grandparents it's like everything's just a lot more transparent now and i think back then our grandparents they just weren't used to the transparency they weren't used to they
just weren't used to the transparency of it and and people like to make their world they don't want to people don't like to change a lot of times we want to make you know okay this is the way the world is and i lived in it and and that's the way it'll always be you know we don't want to admit that the world changes or that people's views change or that that society like changed i mean dude in 200 years everybody could be bisexual who knows it could be the way that science takes us and
then we nobody exists anymore because nobody has a wiener or or a vagina everybody has a vagina and nothing you can't make a baby everybody's just beating their crotches against each other but no babies you know that could be the denouement of it all how it all shapes out we don't know so at that point people will be like Damn,
we got to get some couple straight people up here to the front lines to fuck, to do it right, to do some nookie, to nookie out, you know, to throw, you know, to throw that body water into each other so they can have a child.
So, you know, a lot of hearsay out there.
But if a child, if you believe the kid and they know for a fact, I guess at 12, you can know what age is that fifth grade?
Yeah, maybe these days that's how it is.
I think usually you have to wait till somebody's probably seventh grade before they know if they're definitely going to be gay.
But kids go through phases.
Sometimes you might go through a, you know, especially these days, I don't think it's not wild if somebody's gay for a year or 18 months.
And I'm not saying that it's like they can't be gay forever if they do whatever they want.
But sometimes people are like, oh, I'm going to be gay for July.
That's a thing you'll see out here sometimes.
You know, it's really some guy who's really gay forever and he's trying to sneak you, you know, trying to get you to come over and enlist.
You know?
So, but yeah, that's great.
If people have some suggestions, how to mend those fences, because yeah, you don't want people fighting forever over this.
I can't believe your mom was yelling at a 12-year-old kid about that.
Unless your parents just didn't believe them.
You know, because a lot of kids these days, they say they're all, you know, you'll have kids saying, I'm, you know, this is, you know, all kinds of like political stances and all kinds of stuff.
And you're like, dude, you know, you ain't shit.
You know, you don't have a, you're not doing, you don't even have a job.
So, but yeah, it's interesting as like, because a lot of like perspectives and people's, you know, old views and new views, they're having a tough time.
But I don't think you should shun all old people because they believe something different or they were brought up in a different time.
Because sometimes if they'd have believed what was, what people believe now or what's more common now, more practices, they would have been, they could have been ostracized at that time.
So it's just this weird teeter-totter sometimes.
But congratulations to your daughter for figuring that out.
I'm sure it's interesting to navigate and be supportive, you know, and learn how to, I'm sure it's a really time where you learn how to be real loving when somebody comes at you.
I mean, look, the first set of tits I saw on somebody was on a man that were 3D.
I'd seen some drawn tits and I'd seen my mother's tits.
And I'm sorry, mom, I think she listens to this, but I'd seen some drawn tits and then they had this boy and he was a beautiful ginger guy and he and he was real thick.
You know, he was that real, just that fucking, that Doughy Joey.
He was real like a, you know, like a big pastry or pastry.
And he and he had tits on him.
And sometimes I would look at him and just kind of cover my hands.
I've talked about this before, and I would just make a shape with my hand in front of my eye where all I could see was his breast and pretend he was a woman.
And feel my body get really, you know, feel that little baby diving board start up between my legs.
Feel that baby shark start growing.
And suddenly I feel like a damn shark because I got that wiener fin, bruh.
So praise God, man.
What else we got here?
What else we got here?
Here, we got a call that came in 985-664-9503.
What's up, Dio?
This is Martin.
I'm from Macon, Georgia.
Martin from Macon.
And I bet everything, people always say macon and bacon and stuff like that.
And since it's because everything that that because one thing that's popular that rhymes with macon is bacon.
So I'm sure y'all got to hear all that shit all the time.
Quaking, forsaken.
You know, a lot of churches probably write little cute things on the sign, you know.
You know, don't be forsaken in making.
Breaking.
Oh, we've had a lot of break-ins in making.
So, onward.
And last Friday, I put my two weeks in at work.
I'm calling because I've got two dogs, Nacho and Taco.
Nacho, I bought on my own, and Taco was bought for me by the hunting lodge that I work at.
And, you know, that's going to be a point of contention now because I'm leaving at the beginning of the season.
And the owner of the lodge is trying to fuck me out of this dog, man.
He's trying to take taco from me after I've taken care of this dog for the last six months and raised it and trained it.
And he's a pretty hard guy, pretty rough around the edges, likes to screw people over.
And, you know, I'm trying to get out of here without burning any bridges, but if he tries to take this dog from me, then I don't know what's going to happen.
It's eaten me up because Nacho and Taco are obviously brothers at this point.
And I want to do everything in my power to keep them together when I leave here.
Any help would be much appreciated.
Much love.
Gang, bro, look, Nacho and Taco might be brothers.
They might not.
I'm not sure.
Just because you put something next to each other for a long time doesn't make it a brother.
You know what I'm saying?
If you take a hitchhiker and you take somebody who works at the mall, you stand them next to each other for six years.
They still might not get, they still, there's nothing between them.
There's nothing.
As soon as you say go, one of them is going back to work and one of them is fucking, you know, thumbing it to St. Louis.
So you can't just make animals be brothers.
Only God can do that.
So, what I'm saying is, you have to figure out.
It sounds like you have a communication issue, bruh.
I mean, this guy knows what he's expecting.
You have what you're expecting.
You trained him.
It sounded like the dog, was it given to you?
Was it loaned to you?
It sounds like you have some communication.
But if shit hits the fan, bruh, throw that bitch in the back seat.
Fire off a couple rounds, bruh.
You know, I would do warning shots only, man.
That's the big thing people forget about warning shots.
A lot of times people just, oh, they shoot somebody.
You know what also works?
Boom, boom, warning shots.
Think about it.
If somebody sees you shoot a gun twice in the air, the next logical thought to them is, oh, they're going to shoot me.
So I do warning shots, bro.
I'll fire 50, 60 warning shots.
And after that, you can usually, it's usually really clear communication with people after that.
So, you know, I mean, it's getting Wild West out there.
And if you got to shoot something up a little bit to get that animal, then, you know, people love animals.
And I can start to see it a little bit more.
I've been attacked by a lot of different animals.
And, you know, I've been having dreams recently or semi-recently that there was a parrot in Bethlehem in the manger in that baby shed.
I've had a lot of different dreams about that.
Because if you notice in a lot of the drawings, in a lot of those freaking MDs, bro, those manger drawings, the animals are real sedentary animals.
You got a mule in there.
You got a lamb or sheep.
You got a donkey.
You got a cow.
Some of you have a cow in there, which is kind of weird.
A cow, how you get a cow all the way out there into the desert like that is unbelievable.
You have a camel with a little hat on.
But a lot of people, you wouldn't think they'd have a parrot in there.
But I have a lot of dreams where you see there is a parrot.
And he's just kind of, you know, just, no crib for a bed.
You know?
Lay down and sweetheart.
Where's the North Star?
Where's the North Star?
You know, I have a lot of dreams about things that we didn't, you know, behind the scenes of the manger.
Because here's the thing.
Three old dudes go out to the desert to visit a kid.
Bro, that's a dateline episode today.
So I'm not saying it didn't happen.
I believe full, forthright.
I believe 700% that it happened.
But if that can happen, dude, there could be a couple rare animals in there.
You could have a raccoon out there hanging out behind the little baby crib.
They had something in there.
They had a couple raccoons.
They had a couple of, you know, Aardvarks or something up in that bitch.
I mean, that's Bethlehem, dog.
So, but yeah, do what you got to do out there, Papa.
Stay woke, bruh.
And if that's, here's the thing.
You have to answer directly to yourself.
Is that your dog or is that not your dog?
I know if something's my dog.
If I go up to a dog and it ain't my dog, bruh, it ain't my dog.
Just because I've been sleeping with somebody's wife for six months, don't make it my wife.
That's his wife.
Even if I'm teaching her new tricks and I'm, you know, and I bought her one of those, you know, omelette makers that folds over.
It's like the pan that has the little hinges in the middle.
And it doesn't matter.
None of that shit matters, man.
What matters is the facts.
What matters is the documentation.
Who saw the, you know, was it given to you?
Was it not?
You know the answer.
So then you either need to build up to start to part ways with the animal if you want to not burn bridges or you need to fucking get a stack of matches, dog, and light the fucking Golden Gate up, son.
Burn that bitch.
Sorry, man, but it's November, bro.
It's no burner.
It's time to burn shit, man, if you have to.
Not everything can not burn.
So every now and then, something's got to torch out.
Gang shit.
All right, let's take a call here, 985-664-9503.
Hey, CO Keely here from Paso Robles, California.
Hey, Pamela from Paso Robles.
And you think Paso Robles, it sounds like somebody about to get naked in Mexico.
You know what I'm saying?
When you hear somebody say, oh, Paso Robles, say, damn.
Well, let me put the ladder a little closer to the window because I'm about to watch them titas come out.
Guy.
You had a wonderful Halloween.
I myself went through four large bags of candy, saw a bunch of cute little kids come to my house, and then my cousin was picked up by Homeland Security for trying to smuggle in 17 kilos worth of methamphetamine into the state.
Wow.
Now that donkey was not in Bethlehem, I don't think.
And that's the thing about Bethlehem.
They don't show you the x-rays, the MRIs of the animals.
Some of them have dope in their body and their colon.
Homeward?
Well, hopefully yours is better than mine.
I'm sitting here at work trying not to think about it and having a rough time doing so, and I thought I would call and get that off my chest.
May or may not be the last time I see her, I think, because this is not her first.
This is her first home-lane security strike, but this is definitely not her first strike.
She's been suffering with that addiction for, I don't know, 12, 15 years, all of them.
Almost all of my life.
20 almost three now.
It's almost all of my life.
Thank you so much for having this hotline to that too.
And yeah.
Gay, gang.
Love you, man.
Love you too, miss.
Oh, I didn't know.
I thought she was muling it.
I thought she was just for vending.
I didn't know that she had an addiction problem.
Man, it's crazy.
That's heavy, you know, because having a vagina, that's definitely Jesus.
You know, if I had a wiener that had like a little grocery bag hooked to it, I'd probably be running drugs all the time, doing this or doing that, stealing squashes or stealing a couple, what are those things where you put the butter on them and people like them kind of, but they don't really like them.
Asparagus, no.
I'm talking about artichokes.
So, and a vagina, that's one of the problems.
If you have drugs or something, a vagina becomes basically just a place to hide something in your body.
And so when you have addiction, you don't think of it, you know, you don't even think of this as a feminine area anymore.
You think of it as just a tool chest.
You know, you think of it as just a little, like a chest of drawers.
Oh, I'll put this dope right here in this crazy, you know, pouch in between my legs in this extra, you know, this kind of just like a, you know, little glory bucket or just like a satchel.
So, man.
It's unfortunate.
You know, maybe this, here's the thing.
Maybe this would be the thing that shakes her back into reality.
Because everybody, you got to hit your bottom before you start to get a foundation.
And everybody's bottom is a different place.
Some people's bottom is way up here.
It's not a low bottom.
Some people have that low bottom.
They just real sonic the hedgehog when it comes to the drugs or the, you know, pornography or whatever.
And it's a fight and it's a struggle.
And I hope that she gets it.
I hope that this is a blessing in disguise and this is that thing.
This is the merry-go-round that turns her back to, you know, to reality.
And a year from now, you see her come around the edge and they got a mirror by her and like a fake horse and a damn cinnamon stick.
And she's on a damn, you know, she's coming around the bend.
And because yeah, there's not, I mean, it's funny because the things we do when we're in addiction, some of them are just cries for help.
And maybe that's what this is in a weird way.
But I wish her well and I think it's sweet that you care about her so much.
And I mean, who knows at Christmas time, she could be 60 days sober and really have a whole new perspective.
And hopefully this will be that for her.
All right.
What else, man?
We got to pay the bills here.
And you guys, if you want to support the podcast, then support it.
We'll take it.
You know, I want to let you know that if you are struggling with something, and I struggle, look, I'm struggling right now with pornography, man.
I've had, you know, I was doing well.
And then this past, really this past six months, man, I've really had a tough time with, not pornography as much, but cigarettes and just, man, but I'm tired.
I'm tired of swimming in the same circle.
I'm tired of it, man.
I'm tired of when the rat hits the road of, you know, not having enough cheese in the fridge to fucking say, okay, it's going to be different this time.
So, yeah, and it's just, you know, it's a battle.
We stay fighting, though.
You know, we stay fighting.
And that's what we do here.
And I hope that your cousin does the same.
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BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist.
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You know, it's funny because I would notice for myself that a lot of times if I would go out with drugs or do something like that, or it was always surrounding a woman.
There was always a female or some tits involved in it nearby.
If you catch me near some Coke and you look in the distance, there might be tits around.
Because one of them always had to do with the other.
I was really, there was some feelings, there was some validation I needed from women or something or whatever that ended up steering me towards drugs.
Or even just experiment, just messing around with drugs.
I wasn't real wild about it, but it was enough of the times where I noticed like, oh, I was rejected or this made me feel this way.
And then next thing you know, I'm spackling the inside of my fucking face with that canary powder, bruh.
You feel me?
With that fucking, that parrot flower.
That cocaine.
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And I'll say this.
We're going to get into some more calls.
We've got some good ones that have come in.
And thank you guys for sharing, you know, being willing to share what's going on with you with me.
And just thinking about stuff.
You know, yeah, I've been struggling a lot with the cigarettes recently.
And I'm just tired of just going in these circles, man.
At a certain point, I just got to fucking be strong enough to just get just.
But then it's like, man, I don't want to not have anything, you know.
You know, can't drink, can't do drugs, can't.
It's just hard, man.
it's hard sometimes.
You know, and I know there's better stuff out there to make me feel good.
I know those things.
But sometimes it's still like, you know, you just want to.
You just, you know, I don't like not being able to do what I want to do.
I don't like something or someone telling me what I can and can't do.
But that's just small picture me.
And big picture me knows that there's better ways to there's better methods and there's better things I can do that will actually bring me some long-term joy than it's getting that short-term fucking that little puffy puffy dude that little dirty them cigarillos bro
them readys bro gang last ad I gotta tell you Zip Recruiter I'll say this cafe Altura's Dylan Mishkowitz needed to hire a director of coffee for his organic coffee company but he was having trouble finding qualified applicants that makes sense if you go outside and yell outside hey I need help with this coffee director you could get anybody you could get somebody who's selling drugs you could get anybody so he switched to ZipRecruiter ZipRecruiter
doesn't depend on candidates finding you it finds them for you its technology identifies people with the right experience and invites them to apply to your job so you get qualified candidates fast that's the thing about zip recruiter it's going to hang it it's saying hey who cares enough to make a good resume who cares enough to look for a job who cares enough to to take action in their life those are the people i want to apply for my job and that's what zip recruiter does it there it already has those people it serves them
right to you and that's how dylan found his new director of coffee in just a few days it's no wonder four out of five employers who post on zip recruiter get a quality candidate within the first day and that's for all types of jobs could be a yard worker could be a tree climber could be somebody that looks for something treasure man see why zip recruiter is effective for businesses of all sizes try it for free at the web address ziprecruiter.com slash tpw that's z-i-p-r-e-c-r-u-i-t-e-r
dot com slash tpw ziprecruiter dot com slash tpw zip recruiter the smartest way to hire um man i wish i had a cousin that had a couple kilos on him when i used to go hard damn bro god sometimes you just want that cocaine snake to just climb up into your body dude and start looking for fucking rubik's cubes you feel me man sometimes
you just want a big cocaine snake to just climb right up into your ass boy all right let's take a call here onward hey feel um i'm calling from texas um but anyways i'm calling because i don't know i have this is an issue um really with my brother i i feel like i kind of hate him feel like he doesn't really give a shit about me um growing up as a kid like we were we
had we lived with our mom she was divorced like uh whenever my dad would say he was gonna come come pick me up i was like always look out the window my dad would never show up and shit every time i heard the car drive by i would always run to the window and look gas feet through his hands but it was like My brother's always telling me, like, that calls me stupid, saying he doesn't love us, he doesn't care about us.
Like, what am I doing?
And then when I'm 19, I find out, like, my dad dies.
I find out that my brother had a relationship with them at some point.
Like, they were hanging out, they were doing shit together.
And then he finds out after my dad died, and I find out because my dad died.
And that really makes me feel a lot of resentment towards my brother because it's like, what the fuck?
Why are you keeping me from him and from me?
Maybe it wasn't his choice.
I don't know.
I have a lot of issues with him.
I don't know how to tell him or really talk to him about it.
But hopefully maybe you can show some lie.
I don't know, man.
Gang, bro.
Thanks for calling, man.
I really appreciate it.
That's nice to call in.
I'm sorry to hear about the situation.
You know, a lot of it I can relate to because my brother and I had a similar relationship.
You know, we didn't get along really when we were kids.
We did.
Actually, there was no connectivity.
You know, my brother and I were brothers by blood, but there was no real, you know, our family, we didn't love each other.
There was no, you know, no one ever taught us like, oh, we're a family and we stick together.
There was none of that kind of shit.
I just felt like I'd just been sentenced to live in a house with a couple other people.
And it was because there was no connection.
You know, I think one of the ways somehow that you can, I don't think you can hold your brother.
You can't hold it against him that he didn't share your dad with you once he met him.
Once they hung out or whatever.
Your dad was the one probably, you know, who was chose not to be around, unless your mother didn't allow him to be around.
That happens sometimes.
Sometimes the mother, they don't allow it.
But if that's not the case, then if your dad didn't, if he wasn't there, man, he wasn't there.
So once your brother kind of got to spend time, like that little bit of time or whatever, you know, I think you're really mad at your dad.
And I think that there's probably like a grieving, you know, I think there's, there might be a grieving program or 12-step program that you could use for grieving that you could join for loss, you know, that people have lost someone and they might be able to help you in there.
You might be able to gather something from them.
That's what I think.
Even if you just went in there and listened to their stories, even if you didn't think you could relate, I bet some of the feelings they have surrounding loss and missed opportunities.
But that was your dad's opportunity that you missed, that he missed.
You know, he missed the chance to get to know you, you know.
I mean, so often we like, you know, we just, it's so amazing how like how much of a young man is all we want is just to see our dad to see us.
It's almost like it's just your only real purpose is to make you is to is for our father to see us to recognize us.
You know, our fathers, they're just a boy.
You know, sadly, they're just a boy.
They're just, you know, they become a man, but sometimes they don't.
Sometimes somebody didn't teach them well.
You know, and sometimes it's interesting because it goes down generation into generation.
And, you know, you have to beat your anger.
You have to find some way.
I don't know if you have to, but you don't have to do anything.
But the way that humanity wins is if we're able to cut off the problem.
You know, if we're able to change our heart or change our ways so that we say, I'm not going to do the same thing that happened to me.
Because the easy thing and the way that you have an easy way out is if you have a kid one day, you don't really, you're not there for the kid.
You always have somebody to blame.
You can blame your dad.
You always have somebody to blame.
A lot can just blame him.
And that's the easy way out.
And nobody could really, people can point fingers at you, but really they point them at you and then they point them upwards over at your daddy.
But the mastery, I think, in life comes if we're able to stop the stop that inherited just dang fuckery, bruh.
I mean, it's sheer dang fuckery, bruh.
SDF.
And just to be able to stop it and to be able to find, you find some way, you know, whether it's through a program or through talking with others or whatever it is, dude, where you're able to find a way to forgive him and find empowerment inside of yourself.
So when you're a dad one day or that you won't let the same thing happen.
You don't let it happen with you and your kid.
Your kid never knows any of those feelings, what that's like.
You know, and that's how we win.
That's how we win.
And it sucks, man.
It sucks sometimes because the way, you know, but if that's not how you get here, like if you don't, that's how you got here.
You don't exist otherwise.
The only way you exist is with that mom and that dad.
That's the only way you exist.
And that's a blessing.
You're here.
This is it.
This is the ride, bro.
And it's bareback, man.
You know, and I think just do your best to love your brother.
You know, you don't know what it was like for him.
You know, and if he doesn't communicate it that well or doesn't communicate it the way you want it to be communicated with him, then that's just, he's going to be what he's going to be.
And you can't hold it against him.
You just got to find some way to just find some joy and to stop that thing from happening.
You know, that's when we win, when we stop.
We're not going to genetic.
We're not going to pass this thing down again.
We're going to change our behavior.
And so this doesn't happen to me.
Because the blessing is you could have been your father.
What if the higher powers had moved you guys up a generation?
And you could be, what if you were your dad?
And you had a son and you don't see him?
But that's not what they did.
They said, hey, we're going to make you the son.
We're going to make you the pivotal piece that can change it.
That can change the behavior and change the course.
Because you're going to need a shovel.
The rivers running like this.
You're going to need a shovel.
And you're going to have to do some work to bend that waterway and create a different traversion of water.
We got to get a new canal going.
And that's really a blessing, man, that the higher powers of the universe put it on you.
They said, this is the boy that can do it.
He's the one that can go through this part where he gets left out by his father.
And he's the one who can turn this river, you know.
He's the one who can do it.
Because it could have been, you could have been up a generation and you just be the daddy and you have a son and you're out bowling or something or doing fucking frisbee golf or something, doing Coke, and you never see your son.
But that's not what they did.
Your dad took that L. And if you think it was probably enjoyable for your father, I bet it wasn't, man.
I couldn't imagine anything more painful than not seeing my kid, even if I would pretend there wasn't.
Even if I would pretend it wasn't painful, I couldn't imagine anything that in my real heart or heart would hurt me more, I bet.
And I don't even have a damn kid, bro.
So, but who knows, man?
They got children out there, you know.
Two six-year-olds just came out of the closet, bro.
So it's getting, you know, things are changing.
It's getting unique out there.
Dude, I wish my nuts were square, man.
Don't you?
Do you ever wish your nuts or square?
I would stack them, bro.
You'd hear them clack.
Stack them bad cats.
Oh, that nut stacker.
You know who he is.
Everybody would know.
All right, let's take this call right here.
Hey, Theo, my name's Evan Madison.
I'm calling you from Westbrook, Minnesota.
Hey, Evan, thank you for calling, man.
And Minnesota, beautiful place out there.
That's where the Mississippi River begins up there in Lake Itasca.
And you can pee in it right there at the top.
And, I mean, it's only about half a foot wide, so it's real easy to just kind of pee right into.
Onward?
About three and a half hours south of Minneapolis, down here in the country.
Okay, you're down there near Iowa then.
You close.
And people don't know.
A lot of people, you know, don't know how land is, and so they don't know that Minnesota and Iowa share a border.
Onward.
Kind of made a full circle move myself.
I've been living up in the cities, living down in Mankato, kind of doing my thing for a while.
And, you know, you kind of get to that age where family just kind of takes a different perspective.
And, you know, my dad kind of had an accident when I was in high school.
He's got some back issues, you know, and to hear him struggling, you know, working his butt off all the time.
You know, I'm the older brother of two, you know, so kind of felt like I needed to step up type of thing.
So I'm back home.
We're farming.
It's harvest time, getting those soybeans and that sweet corn out of the ground.
So it's just, I've been feeling good, man.
Dude, that's awesome, man.
It's beautiful to get back and help your daddy over there.
And that's family romance right there when you care about somebody and you go help them.
That's family romance, bro.
When that love for your family, because we go through these stages, I find anyway, I go through these stages where it's like you don't love, you know, you're just thinking about yourself and it's your own life and you're sprouting like a bean.
But then you start to get big and you realize, oh, man, you know, I really, I miss my roots.
You know, I love being a plant, but man, I just, I really miss my roots.
Let's hear more.
Didn't think I'd ever end up back home in my hometown where I came from, but, you know, working with my family and being around my brother, it's just been a humbling experience.
I'm just feeling good, man.
But I just want to send some love out.
Gang, gang, getting them hitters, hustling that corn at 8 a.m.
to 1 a.m.
Baby, let's go.
Get it.
Gang, bruh.
And you got to love corn.
If you don't love corn, then something's wrong with you.
Think about yourself.
Do you love corn?
If you said no, something's wrong with ya.
Something's wrong with ya.
Because, dude, you think about all the kind of corn they have.
Corn.
Sweet corn.
Candy corn.
Regular corn.
Pop corn.
Corn on the cob.
Cornbread.
Cornish game hen.
Corn.
Unicorn.
I mean, that's if if having if having nine types of corn ain't enough for you then and if you said no to all nine types then yeah something's wrong with you you probably shouldn't be alive.
That's all I'm saying and I'm not threatening you.
This ain't nothing like that.
I'm just saying if one out of nine types of corn you can't exacerbate to one of them then you are the problem.
You think corn's the problem nine times corn comes at you nine different ways and you can every time you can't you know find a comfortable landing space inside of your heart for that C-O-R-N boy then you're the problem there should be a corn test you put you just you do one after the other in front of some person if they say no to all nine bro
Sayonara boy welcome to sword practice boy you going to heaven so but you know it's never too late bruh you know this young man didn't think he was gonna be out there and now he's back at home and it's just man it's like no matter what we're doing it's like if we if it's gonna be joyous we gotta make it joyous joy don't just happen you know we gotta bring it you
know change just doesn't happen we say it all the time but yeah nothing changes if nothing changes tomorrow you're not gonna wake up and your relationship's gonna be different it's not gonna happen unless you do something to affect it and I'm not telling you what to do I don't know what I'm talking about but I'm telling you that I've spent time you know and love somebody but I didn't care enough to do a
lot of the work that it takes to make it mean something and when the game when and when that when and when it ends if it ends you don't you want to look back at the game and just you want to have played it you know you want to have have played it
and yeah it's never too late you know it's never too late to get I was talking about this last week and I don't know why I'm saying it I'm not I'm just talking because I need to hear myself say these things you know it's never too late to to not give up on yourself you know and to get out of your brain and get into action and make some changes they can
be small but to tell somebody you love them to to spend some time with that kiddo to take them to that bishop gun show and see a balloon race instead of just relaxing for the afternoon you know to surprise your wife with lunch or your loved one or something or even if your wife if you if you are oh if you want to if you are someone you know if you more have more of a homoerotic kind of tendency surprise your same-sex loved
one with a sandwich or with a um you know one of them four inch rounds i think is back at subway get them something you know there's nothing more beautiful than two people out there eating a four inch round or something there's just you know it's a limited time man but it's never too late to get over it's never too late to adjust that flow and there's no better time really to
uh to surprise people or to bring somebody back into your life or to adjust the pattern that's going on than the holidays it's the olive branch of the calendar forgiveness is built into it dude you go you take somebody to an orange latte or somebody get somebody a spiced you know one of them cornucopia hats or something buy somebody a damn clove there's a million opportunities to really to
blend and you got this shit and we go fucking hard son and we don't give up on ourselves and we change the tune we change the tune baby let's go you know what i'm saying let's go we got this shit and they say you can't do it and you can do it and you say you can't do it that's the crazy
part a lot of times the they is you it's me it's us it's ourselves you know i sometimes think how can my worst enemy live in my head but that's the challenge of life that's what separates you know people just muskrats from mountain cats baby the one that can see what their brain is trying to do to them and the one that says starts getting that brain to work for
them and we got this we got this man good luck to everybody out there have a good day have a good night tickle somebody tickle your spouse when was the last time you tickled them tickle your fucking cousin bro tickle your fat cousin you know he gonna like it bro he say he don't like it he gonna like it
you know it's okay man buy somebody a little thing of tater tots for lunch bruh somebody at work you think y'all don't get along buy him a shake or something buy him a strawberry shake buy him a snack you see you see some little fella you know he he you know, he dressed up like a mermaid.
Pick his throw his little ass up.
You know, put him in an aquarium, bruh.
Repurpose that little bastard, you know.
It's never too late.
It's never too late.
And as always, this is Stevie Starlight, and he's been with us since the beginning, man, this music man, with his hit, It's Never Too Late to Come Over.
that's it I don't know about it.
Make a dream higher than a mountain.
Just don't say goodbye.
Set me free, baby.
Just don't say goodbye.
It's you and me.
Enjoy the destination.
Fantasy.
Painted on the wall.
It's never too late to come over.
Time slips away from you and me now.
Fuck yeah.
So don't hesitate to come over.
Yeah.
Owe it to yourself.
How must we wait when we're alive?
How must we wait when we're alive?
Thank you.
And that's Stevie Starlight come over.
And you can find that on YouTube.
And Stevie was a guest early on the show.
And he's one of a kind.
And so are you.
And so am I. And we got this.
You know, sometimes it's not always the victory.
Sometimes it's the fight.
But we won't give up one more week.
We did it.
We here.
You hear.
We're going to be okay.
You guys be good to yourselves.
You deserve it, huh?
And thank you for reminding me to do the same.
Gang.
This podcast is supported by Morgan Stanley.
At Morgan Stanley, old school hard work meets bold new thinking to help you see untapped possibilities and relentlessly work with you to make them real.
To learn more, visit MorganStanley.com slash why us.
Investing involves risk, Morgan Stanley SmithBarney LLC.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite and welcome to Kite Club, a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure your partner.
The answer may shock you.
Sometimes I'll interview my friends.
Sometimes I won't.
And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.
You have three new voice messages.
A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.
I've been talking about Kite Club for so long, longer than anybody else.
So great.
Hi, Sweet.
Easy deal.
Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker.
Jamain.
I'll take a quarter potter with cheese and a McFlurry.
Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.
I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me.
Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is tell everyone about Kite Club.
Second rule of Kite Club is tell everyone about Kite Club.
Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts or watch us on YouTube, yeah?
