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| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| Greetings, you proud sons of Skyrim. | |
| Now, you can't see me, but you can hear me. | |
| I opted for the better audio quality today, and my hair isn't what it should be. | |
| So, I know that this episode will only be viewed by the truest of friends. | |
| So, I'm gonna talk, folks, me a bit more about talking to you. | |
| You just want to talk to you? | |
| But first, let us talk to this fine gentleman. | |
| My greetings, true friend. | |
| Does he really does he have a skull? | |
| Is everything ready? | |
| Yeah, just let the old man know when you're ready. | |
| I'm ready, main. | |
| Let's do it, man. | |
| That's it, man. | |
| Glad you made it here safely, Dexian. | |
| Ah, my rescuer. | |
| It's good to see you again. | |
| It's not extraordinary. | |
| He can't really see me either, though, because he's blind. | |
| But your man, Isran, has seen to myself. | |
| Man, Eastromba. | |
| And, might I add, this is a remarkable fortress. | |
| I have colleagues back home that would love to study this place in detail. | |
| I also love the Dangle Fortress. | |
| Oh, certainly. | |
| Let's find out. | |
| It's cozy as well. | |
| If everyone will please be quiet, I must have a fault. | |
| Alright, I will participate in this quietness. | |
| This is now the difference. | |
| The voice fades and the words begin to shimmer and distort. | |
| But wait, there is more here. | |
| This wasn't a very good introduction at all. | |
| I want to talk, and now he takes my attention away. | |
| Yeah, well. | |
| Juicy. | |
| One contains the ancient secrets of the dragons, and the other speaks of the potency of ancient blood. | |
| My vision darkens, and I see no more. | |
| The prophecy. | |
| We must have the other two scrolls. | |
| I'm impressed now. | |
| The reading has nailed me the way. | |
| Oh, look, he has a sword. | |
| Hello, gorgeous. | |
| What's on your mind, gorgeous? | |
| That moth priest, Dexi. | |
| I love her pale skin. | |
| I like girls with pale skins. | |
| I can confirm this to be true. | |
| Half the people in your little crew would just as soon kill me as talk to me. | |
| That doesn't exactly make me want to open up. | |
| I got a warmer woman. | |
| Do you trust Hawken at all? | |
| I would also be obsessed with it. | |
| But obsessed is a word used by the lazy to describe the dedicated. | |
| I don't even think he sees me as his daughter anymore. | |
| I'm just a means to an end. | |
| I would never treat my daughter like that. | |
| That is disgraceful. | |
| Do you think she's a MILF? | |
| She actually has it herself. | |
| The last time I saw her, she said that she'd go somewhere safe. | |
| Somewhere that my father was. | |
| I think she was a beauty in her day. | |
| But then again, if she's a vampire, she can be still a piece of skin. | |
| I don't know. | |
| Some place he would never search. | |
| It was cryptic, yet she called attention to it. | |
| Sickening. | |
| Maybe. | |
| I want to be polite with this fair maiden because she's a vampire after all, so I can't imagine a single place my father would avoid looking. | |
| And he's had all this time, too. | |
| Any ideas? | |
| Castlevolkihar? | |
| Wait, that almost makes sense. | |
| There's a courtyard in the castle. | |
| I used to help her tend a garden there. | |
| All of the ingredients for our potions came from there. | |
| She used to say that my father couldn't stand the place. | |
| Too peaceful. | |
| Oh, absolutely. | |
| But my mother's not a coward. | |
| That is, I don't think we'll actually trip over her there, but it's worth a look at the map. | |
| Let us do it, true friends. | |
| True, but I know a way we can get to the courtyard without arousing suspicion. | |
| There's an unused inlet on the northern side of the island that was used by the previous owners to bring supplies into the castle. | |
| An old escape tunnel from the castle exits there. | |
| I think that's our way in. | |
| It's around the side of the castle. | |
| Alright, let's go. | |
| I want to tell you all a little secret. | |
| Alright, let's explore the place. | |
| Yeah, the little secret I will tell you right now, dear old true friends. | |
| I will tell this secret right now because I know that if you're watching this, that means you're watching my Let's Plays, and not all my subscribers are doing that. | |
| And you're also watching this, even despite I don't have a face cam. | |
| So, the little secret is that I have actually DOMS in my chest. | |
| That is that's fucking sickening. | |
| And the reason for that is I'm so used to go high-re oh, I mean low reps and heavy, and now I went like a really fucking intense high-reps pump for the pump for the something. | |
| And then I got a severe doms, so I still have it. | |
| I had it yesterday as well, but I'll train the chest later today, either way, just for the lulz. | |
| Like, so I'm still in my little rehab phase. | |
| I might do some leg press or something, but I'm still taking it easy with the lower back. | |
| And for those of you who perhaps only are watching my let's plays, if there are any that was the wrong power. | |
| Yeah, I am I hurt my back, but that's now let's see. | |
| I'm rendered, of course. | |
| That is all, not all good, but mostly good now. | |
| I love beating Skelethomsters, so easy to beat. | |
| Shut your insolent mouth. | |
| I shouldn't have said that. | |
| This skeleton was actually quite hard to beat, to be honest. | |
| It's only a regular from a skeleton. | |
| That was a close call, true friends. | |
| No like and oh fuck, what's what's this now? | |
| What in the actual fuck was that? | |
| I'm gonna see if I have some potions. | |
| Uh so yeah, but I assume that that most people are actually watching my other videos and then also my left place. | |
| Unless someone just have found my left place in some way and aren't really too bothered with my narcissistic posing and stuff that I do in my regular videos. | |
| I'm gonna wait an hour here to heal up. | |
| So yeah, this, entering this fort here, this is Christmas feels from two years ago than I was in this exact place. | |
| Hello, hello. | |
| And a thing I don't really understand why Betesta isn't doing is why in the actual fuck aren't they making another expansion to Skyrim, instead of spending all of that time? | |
| robot a dog and I'm your master but sorry yeah an expansion skyrim for sick | |
| Because if they released another DLC to good old Skyrim, I mean, imagine how many fucking people would buy that supply and demand, true friends, supply and demand. | |
| How dare you assault my fair maiden Pharaoh, vampire fuck, that was incredibly glorious. | |
| If I may be so bold, I need you to be my loyal and faithful companion and protect me. | |
| No, that's, not very manly at all. | |
| I'm, I'm the, I'm the man in this relationship, so I have to protect her. | |
| Come now Serana, let us oh, look at this. | |
| Some good old loot, minor healing, stat leather strips. | |
| And, speaking of something entirely else, I am missing my own fair maiden quite a bit, to be to be perfectly honest, but that's just the way it is. | |
| That is just the way it is. | |
| For those of you who are unaware, we're actually having a long distance relationship because I studied in good old Ireland last last autumn and I was too much in love with her to not keep on being her man. | |
| Oh sorry, it was wrong. | |
| No huh strange yeah, so we have a long distance relationship and then obviously, you miss um, you miss each other because you want to see each other, like for the love of god, every month or so. | |
| So that's um, and especially over christmas, like everyone is with their loved ones. | |
| Obviously I have a great family and all but um Yeah, you can uh tend to miss your uh fair maiden either way, but that's just, that's just how it is, like that's life. | |
| You um you are a bit like that sometimes. | |
| But uh oh, we're uh, we're going the wrong way. | |
| Uh so, and the advice for anyone who is a bit like, obviously not heartbroken because things are good between us and everything, like we, we love each other greatly. | |
| But uh, if you are in that situation, don't dwell on it too much, especially if you can't really do anything about it. | |
| Just like, keep yourself occupied with other things, like gaming, for example. | |
| That's how it goes, you insolent dog ah, look at that. | |
| So you don't dwell on things like that. | |
| So go to the gym, be with your boys, play some fucking Skyrim or whichever game you play. | |
| I've actually been playing some Assassin's Creed, Assassin's Creed, Brotherhood and now also Revelation to, so I get the whole story before I delve into Black Flag and then Unity. | |
| So, that's my sincere advice right there. | |
| If you have a bit of a heartache or something like that, then keep busy. | |
| Don't dwell on it too much. | |
| If you dwell on it, it will only get worse. | |
| And then also, like it's basically the same as, as you know, when you're cutting and don't eat so much food as you would like like, I mean, the more you dwell on it for the glory of Sparta, oh fuck, oh there we are. | |
| The more you dwell on something, the bigger of a problem it gets when it doesn't really have to be. | |
| You know that hard. | |
| If you accept that it will be hard regardless and then you strive to best do the best of the situation, then you will be better off. | |
| I promise you. | |
| Are we actually going down there? | |
| Hello hello Seranas deathhound, fucking juicy. | |
| Alright, let's try it. | |
| And this... | |
| No, we came from here. | |
| And I just love this place. | |
| This is probably one of my favorite places in, like, of all gaming moments. | |
| It is so fucking immersive. | |
| But I can't, for the love of Talos, figure out where in the actual fuck we're going. | |
| We've already been down there. | |
| I need to find the the way. | |
| That's exactly what I need. | |
| All right, bear with me while I try to figure out this highly blasphemous place perhaps Misk yeah, I was gonna say that I actually spent some time at the Misk today. | |
| Was uh, was nice uh, the good old Misk. | |
| And for those of you who are unaware, that is Bodybuilding.com's misc section. | |
| Um aha, so so we lowered a bridge there. | |
| That means we must go back from whence we came. | |
| Uh yeah, bodybuilding's misc section and uh yeah, it's a fun enough place. | |
| Uh ah, contracted rattles perfect, not perfect. | |
| Uh, and I just love the banter at the misc. | |
| Like obviously, they are quite um, can be quite rude and then like have um and some funny ideas about stuff. | |
| Um, but the the banter is, if you're not too serious going into the misc, it's a really, really funny place. | |
| And I actually started becoming noticed first at at the misc. | |
| Actually, it was uh, it was good times when I got voted to be the Latsbra. | |
| Right, I remember this. | |
| We're gonna find these fangs and place them here, place aha, the proper crest there well, and we're gonna find the rest. | |
| And, as I said before, like the fang with Skyrim is, it's so fun with all the the little puzzles and fangs. | |
| It's not only hack and slash, hack and slash. | |
| So yeah, speaking of Assassin's Creed, I've I feel like I've spent quite a bit of time in my Skyrim episodes talking about Assassin's Creed, so maybe I should actually play it sometime now. | |
| Let's see. | |
| Ah, look at this sickening courtyard and into the tower, ruins. | |
| Well, at least we're getting closer. | |
| Let's go. | |
| Indeed we are. | |
| And, by the way, I know the loyal one Dean, will actually look at this. | |
| Greetings, true friend, and you recommended me an Elven armor of wisdom, in all actuality, from Middle-earth, but I'm gonna have to be. | |
| I admire this armor more. | |
| I think it's fucking gorgeous. | |
| I think it's beautiful, this armor in particular. | |
| But thank you for the, for the suggestion. | |
| But I, I think, do you all agree this? | |
| This armor is it? | |
| Is it glorious enough for the golden one? | |
| I mean, if my character's name and this very YouTube channel's name is the golden one, it's appropriate that they actually have, you know, a gold or bronze armor. | |
| Okay, I'm preparing to fight now. | |
| Fight me, Dallas. | |
| I love you. | |
| Glory to Makedon. | |
| Whoop. | |
| Ah, fuck. | |
| Don't wanna get hit in the back like that. | |
| Hello. | |
| Hello. | |
| Ah. | |
| Sickening. | |
| Oh, she's she's boxing up there with skeleton. | |
| Greeting skeleton. | |
| You have been visited by the hungry skeleton. | |
| All your gains will be forfeit. | |
| No. | |
| Okay. | |
| Ah, fuck. | |
| ZALOS! | |
| That was actually a new one. | |
| That was highly glorious. | |
| I hope you all admired my gameplay there with the blocking. | |
| Now, since I have light armor, I have to block as much as possible because I can't really stand that much. | |
| What? | |
| Her own skeleton backstander. | |
| Such a bustard. | |
| How dare he talk to her like that? | |
| How dare he? | |
| Yeah, since I have light armor, I need to block a lot. | |
| And since I have a two-handed weapon, I need to have a lot of stamina to be able to wield it and to block. | |
| So my basic setup is a lot of stamina, block a lot, and do a lot of damage. | |
| Do a lot of damage. | |
| I sounded a bit like Ned Stark there. | |
| One of the favorite quotes I have from the Game of Thrones is when he says, Jamie Lannis is busted when he talks with Cersei. | |
| Are you gonna come alive? | |
| No? | |
| No? | |
| Perhaps not. | |
| Where there we are. | |
| Hello, gorgeous. | |
| Hello, mate. | |
| Do you, in all actuality, want to box with me? | |
| Ah, extremely poor gameplay there by me, I must unfortunately admit. | |
| I missed my shout. | |
| In all actuality, I did. | |
| I'm going to utilize a quick save there so I don't die all of a sudden. | |
| Oh fuck. | |
| There I got in a proper... | |
| Proper hit. | |
| Ah, come on, now, come on, come on, come on. | |
| A close call indeed. | |
| Yeah, about the lack of face cam. | |
| I've actually seen that almost no Let's players have a face cam which is it's just because I want to show off my glorious hair. | |
| Ah fuck that I have it, but sometimes the hair is unruly and yes the uh the editing process is quite a bit easier and I can focus more on talking and the gameplay instead of um looking good for the camera. | |
| Okay, so I'm gonna go with stamina here as well. | |
| So I can just increase my blocking game. | |
| So, what will we do? | |
| Smithing. | |
| Hmm. | |
| Okay, I need to step up my gainer. | |
| Two-handed, it's always fun. | |
| 90. | |
| That's. | |
| Sweep. | |
| Okay, let's do that. | |
| War Master. | |
| War Master Horus. | |
| This guy will come alive. | |
| I sense it. | |
| Hello. | |
| Hello, hello, me again. | |
| On the master fully done. | |
| Okay, I'm gonna charge TALOS! | |
| I sense that Talos was winning there, so I... | |
| What? | |
| Who's there? | |
| Aha! | |
| Talos, I love you! | |
| Sickening we're getting close getting closer Quick save. | |
| He didn't actually do it much damage. | |
| And I need to start stop missing those. | |
| I mean. | |
| Sickening. | |
| Sickening gains. | |
| However, I'm just gonna give this a little try No, fuck. | |
| Okay, two tries. | |
| That's always the case, when I have, um, these doors. | |
| Huh. | |
| How quick. | |
| Plentiful healing. | |
| Thank you for that. | |
| A lot of poverty weapons. | |
| I don't want these weapons. | |
| It's not even good. | |
| Fuck. | |
| Glory to Makedon! | |
| Ah, brilliant. | |
| I got them both. | |
| For the glory of Sparta. | |
| They got really easy there. | |
| Okay, come at me, Bru. | |
| Come at me, bruh. | |
| Oh, you're standing up there, are we? | |
| Oh yeah, where is, in all actuality, our beloved crossbow? | |
| There we are. | |
| Crossbow, tree. | |
| Yes, thank you. | |
| Thank you very much. | |
| How dare you, talk to me like that. | |
| Shut your insolent mouth down. | |
| That was a beautiful headshot, by the way. | |
| Boom. | |
| Okay, let's get out in boys. | |
| I blocked him to death. | |
| Ah, no, I didn't. | |
| She actually did. | |
| A chest, how quaint. | |
| Some gold. | |
| Yes, thank you very much. | |
| I'm also sure we're getting close. | |
| Look at this. | |
| Statue of Dibella by the looks of it Somebody has a nailed arrow to my my poor head How dare they? | |
| And also, speaking of my own hair, it resembles the hair of the character. | |
| But you already know that. | |
| Because this is the is it the eighth or the ninth episode? | |
| Either way, then you have seen my hair in all the previous episodes. | |
| Hello, dog. | |
| Greetings. | |
| Cure disease, always a nice fine. | |
| Okay, quick save. | |
| And then a charge for Sparta. | |
| A charge for Sparta. | |
| And now I've made so many videos on my glorious channel that I might start repeating some things I've said. | |
| And if you want a glorious TV series, Spartacus Blood and Sand, you must see it. | |
| If you haven't seen it, do so immediately. | |
| Hello mates. | |
| Oh, I can't believe I missed that. | |
| Boom. | |
| Ah fuck fuck fuck. | |
| That's exactly how it goes. | |
| Yeah, Spartacus Blood and Sand. | |
| Highly, highly sickening. | |
| Violence and good speeches. | |
| Vatiatus is glorious. Love it. | |
| Absolutely love it. | |
| Hello. | |
| Oh, he did not want to box with me. | |
| Do we have other cool fans here? | |
| No, not really. | |
| Here then. | |
| Wow. | |
| Royal armor. | |
| I'm just gonna look at that and see if it's juicy enough to wear. | |
| It's beautiful, but not good enough. | |
| Holy fuck, I can't be killed by our own guy. | |
| But it looked like she had bugged us been bugged there, so. | |
| Come on now, Sarana. | |
| Cop on! | |
| That's how you deal with vampires. | |
| You block attack. | |
| Come on, then. | |
| Oh well, I'm sure she will follow Ula's clairvoyance, always nice. | |
| Aha, okay. | |
| I think there is a secret. | |
| Ah, there we are. | |
| I knew it. | |
| secret passage of some sort it's sick Ah, look at this. | |
| It's gonna wait a moment so Saran can catch up with us if she wants to do that. | |
| Ah, look at this. | |
| We have a lot of juicy books. | |
| No, perhaps not juicy books, even. | |
| I want leveling books, those are fun. | |
| Ah, look at this, though. | |
| Mizerin. | |
| Misery gains. | |
| We can enchant thanks with this. | |
| And I've actually enchanted most of my thanks. | |
| I'm not really proficient in alchemy. | |
| There we have an enchanting table, but I'm gonna do that in a non when I game and don't make Let's Plays because that's more of a grinding thing to do. | |
| So I'm gonna get on with the storyline. | |
| Look at this place. | |
| This has to be it. | |
| I knew she was deep into necromancy. | |
| I mean, she taught me everything I know. | |
| But I had no idea she had a setup like this. | |
| Look at all this. | |
| She must have spent years collecting these components. | |
| And what's this thing? | |
| What's this thing? | |
| I'm not sure about this circle, but it's obviously something. | |
| Let's take a look around. | |
| There has to be something here that tells us where she's gone. | |
| My mother was meticulous about her research. | |
| If we can find her notes, there might be some hints in there. | |
| Okay, let us locate Valerica's journal. | |
| And ah, the lusty Argonian maid. | |
| I'm gonna take that for the lols. | |
| Very well, but I'm afraid my oven isn't hot enough. | |
| It could take hours. | |
| I've actually read that in another let's play. | |
| If you haven't read it in the game, be sure to do so because it's hilarious. | |
| It's like an erotic novel. | |
| Any luck yet? | |
| They raid. | |
| You did? | |
| Let me see them. | |
| I only know what she told me. | |
| She had a sick thing about soul gems. | |
| That the souls inside of them don't just vanish when they're used. | |
| They end up in the soul cairn. | |
| The soul cairn is home to very powerful beings. | |
| Necromancers send them souls and receive powers of their own in return. | |
| My mother spent a lot of time trying to contact them directly to travel to the soul cairn itself. | |
| That circle in the center of the room is definitely some type of portal. | |
| If I'm reading this right, there's a formula here that should give us safe passage into the soul cairn. | |
| Sickening. | |
| A handful of soul green shards, some finely ground bone meal, a good bit of purified void salts. | |
| Damn it. | |
| We're also going to need a sample of her blood, which, if we could get that, we wouldn't even be trying to do this in the first place. | |
| Can take your blood maiden. | |
| Not bad. | |
| We'd better hope that's good enough. | |
| Mistakes with these kind of portals can be gruesome. | |
| Anyway, enough of that. | |
| Let's get started. | |
| Oh, definitely. | |
| Mother would have plenty of those materials in her laboratory. | |
| You just need to find them. | |
| Alrighty then. | |
| Didn't I collect all right, true friends? | |
| Let us go. | |
| I'm ready. | |
| Indeed it is a fair maiden. | |
| I don't want to ask her anything. | |
| I'm ready. | |
| Let's do it. | |
| Let's do it, Fairmaiden. | |
| Let us, in all actuality, do this. | |
| Let's do this. | |
| It was my Ronnie Coleman impersonation. | |
| Yeah, buddy. | |
| Incredible. | |
| Enter the Soul Cairn. | |
| How um, how nice. | |
| How incredibly nice. | |
| I'll actually have to save that for the next juicy and glorious episode. | |
| And then we'll do the Soul Cairn as the next episode. | |
| Yeah. | |
| So thank you very much for watching this and I hope it was a good episode despite the lack of face cam. | |
| I hope that is all good. | |
| I um I thought that I show my like face so much either way in my regular videos. | |
| So you know how I look anyway. | |
| But leave me your comments. | |
| Like as always, all criticism is welcome and appreciated. | |
| So if you don't like if you don't like it, if you don't care, let me know. | |
| I want to make the best videos possible because you take the time to watch them. | |
| So then I obviously want to create as good of a you know finished product as possible. | |
| And who am I? | |
| I'm the proud son of Skyrim. |