It's In the Code Ep. 51: Right Where God Wants You to Be - Or Not
In the previous episode, Dan looked at what’s going on when people tell us we are “right where God wants us to be.” But what does it mean when those same people DON’T tell us that? Why do they seem to say this at some times, but not others? What does it mean, and what effects does it have on us? In this episode, Dan explores this topic, arguing that this reflects bad theology and that it matters because of the damage bad theology doe to people.
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Hello and welcome to the series, It's in the Code, part of the podcast It's in the Code, part of the podcast Straight White American Jesus.
My name is Dan Miller, professor of religion and social thought at Landmark College.
I am your host.
As always, I want to begin by thanking everybody who listens, everybody who supports us in so many ways, whether you are a patron, whether you suffer through the ads and support us that way.
If you just email us and keep in touch and let us know what you're thinking, what you think of this series, what you think of the podcast, keeping the ideas coming, whatever it is, we thank you for that.
Couldn't do it without you.
As always, for this series in particular, I welcome your feedback, your thoughts, your insights.
I can be reached at danielmillerswag, danielmillerswaj at gmail.com.
Love to hear from you all.
And on that note, today, a little bit different episode than some.
I got a really pronounced sort of response, I think, from some listeners on the episode, Right Where God Wants You to Be.
And people shared with me some very moving stories, you know, ways that the episode sort of resonated with them, made sense to them, stories about how that phrase had been directed at them.
But what they really sort of highlighted was how selective that assurance had been, right?
That this assurance that, you know, you're right where God wants you to be, how sort of selective it had been when that was applied to them by others and when it wasn't.
And what kind of struck me as I read those emails and Thank you to those who sent them.
You know who you are.
I'm not going to mention you by name today, but I responded to a number of those.
And so, you know, if you corresponded with me about that, you'll know who you are.
What struck me is that this is a pattern that often accompanies A certain kind of conservative Christian theology, and it's the theology that says that God has a plan for your life, that God is in control, that God is sovereign, that God has you right where He wants you, etc.
And these are all topics we've talked about in this episode.
I'm not going to sort of rehash all of those, but I invite listeners to go back, search those up, take a listen.
But what struck me is how selective the application of them is and what that means.
And what I think it demonstrates is, first of all, sort of bad theology, but it also says a great deal about the use of all of these appeals and the purposes to which they're put.
So, today's a little bit strange because, as I say, it's kind of a follow-up on that episode, but it gets at a theme, an element of this kind of decoding that cuts through a number of different themes.
And everybody knows, if you've listened to this series at all, That that notion of not just what does the language mean, but how is it used?
What is the purpose of it?
What effects does it have?
That's one of my big interests.
And this episode is also different because it's kind of, I don't know, maybe more reflections on theology than typical.
It's not a theology podcast.
I'm not going to turn it into a theology podcast.
But these comments really just did tie, for me, tie together the way that a certain kind of bad theology that is at the core of a certain kind of popular American Christianity is, I think, inherently flawed.
And those flaws are, they're in the code, they're written right in, and it's why it can't be redeemed.
And I think that comes to the fore In the kinds of issues that folks are raising for me about not just the way that God has a plan for us or we're right where God wants us, the effects that it can have kind of narrowly construed, but the way in which it isn't always applied and the selectivity of that.
Okay, so here's what I want to sort of think about here, right, is that part of the codes that we talk about in this series, right, the decoding that we do, is looking not just at when and how these kind of phrases or terms or tropes are used, but it can be just as telling to look at when they're not.
The kind of the times when those who use them sort of fall silent.
And I think that this really came to the fore with the episode on being right where God wants us.
And so here's kind of how the story goes.
And a lot of you, again, will be familiar with this story.
Right.
But it's basically that, you know, when things in my life are pretty decent, I'm I'm quote, I'm right where God wants me to be.
Right.
That's what we're told.
But when something beyond our control happens, something that's bad, maybe I get sick.
Maybe my house is damaged in a natural disaster.
Maybe I'm facing a career choice.
Maybe I've been fired, you know, and it's a really pressing career choice or whatever.
I'm also told that, you know, I'm right where God wants me to be, that there's some opportunity right on the horizon and so forth.
And we've talked about that.
But here's the key.
When I make a decision that the church doesn't like, or its leadership doesn't like, or my Christian family or friends or acquaintances don't like, it's like suddenly I'm not right where God wants me to be.
This is the kind of thing that I was hearing from folks in response to that earlier episode that I really wanted to take up here.
These examples are not drawn necessarily directly from what I heard from folks.
Some of them are, but some of them are others.
Let's say if I leave the church because I don't agree with its politics, right?
Maybe I've raised questions about its politics, and I've been shut down, and I think, you know what?
I'm leaving the church.
Or I'm just fed up with patriarchy.
Or I'm queer.
Or I'm LGBTQ affirming, and I leave the church.
I walk away from it because of its teachings.
In that instance, I'm not reassured that I'm, quote, right where God wants me to be.
Right?
Going further, again, this reflects the experience of folks I hear from related to this podcast, but also my clients with the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery.
Again, I'm a practitioner working with folks wrestling with religious trauma through there.
If people go further and they leave their religious identity entirely for whatever reason, they're not assured then that they are, quote, right where God wants them to be.
If I find myself in a bad place because of, say, untreated mental health issues or dependence issues, I'm not, in that instance, reassured that I'm, quote, right where God wants me to be if my marriage falls apart.
I'm not reassured by those same people that I'm right where God wants me to be, right?
So stated simply, when Christian friends or acquaintances or family members, and certainly when Christian church leaders, when they feel that there's something morally or theologically problematic about the life situation in which I find myself, I am no longer told by them that I'm right where God wants me to be.
Okay?
And somebody might listen and say, well, so what?
Of course not.
You're doing things that they disagree with.
You're doing things that they say God doesn't like.
Of course they're not going to tell you that, you know, you're right where God wants you to be.
This response makes sense, right?
If you no longer believe that I'm doing the things I need to do to be a faithful Christian, a faithful servant of God, you're not gonna tell me, oh, you're right where God wants you to be, right?
If you think that the things I'm doing are leading me away from God, is the language that they might use, of course you'll say, or you won't say in this case, you're right where God wants you to be, right?
Cool, I get that.
It completely makes sense, and I've had those conversations.
I've been told by people who view my life at this point as a cautionary tale of what happens if you read too much philosophy or get too many degrees or whatever.
You won't be a faithful Christian anymore.
I've been told that, right?
And I certainly have not been told that I'm right where God wants me to be by those who don't think that I'm a good Christian and so forth.
But here's the issue, okay?
This is where we've got to get into some theology here, okay?
That response might make sense, but it doesn't fit with the theology that people who say we're right where God wants us to be, or God has a plan for our life, or God is in control, or whatever, It doesn't fit with that response.
That response doesn't make sense with that theology, and here's why.
People who say that, what they tell us they believe, right?
The thing that gives them confidence that they can proclaim boldly that God is a plan for our lives in the first place, is that God is sovereign or God is omnipotent.
And what they mean by that I promise this is not a theology podcast.
We're not going to delve too deeply into this, okay?
But what they mean by that is that God is in control of everything that happens.
God's all-powerfulness, the fancy word is His omnipotence, right?
God's omnipotence is such that nothing happens that God doesn't intend or will to happen, right?
There can be and have been other understandings of what it means to say God is all-powerful.
There are theologies that just don't even posit God as omnipotent in the first place, right?
But for most evangelicals, Following from the beliefs of most evangelical pastors, reflecting the positions of most evangelical theologians and seminaries, this is what it means to say that God is omnipotent or sovereign.
This is a core piece of conservative theology, particularly in Protestant circles, right?
This understanding of divine sovereignty is a mainstay of theologically conservative Christianity, that God is all-powerful, God is omnipotent, and what that means is nothing happens other than what God intends.
Nothing happens that God does not intend, nothing happens that God doesn't know about or see coming and so forth, right?
That's the viewpoint.
And here's the problem with that view.
This is nothing new, folks.
This is not insights that I'm giving that other people haven't given.
Critics of that understanding of omnipotence, God's all-powerfulness, Critics have been raising these issues since before Christianity existed.
That understanding of God did not originate with Christianity, and critics of it—philosophical critics, theological critics—have raised concerns about it for millennia.
But here's the problem.
If God wills or intends everything that happens—if that's what it has to mean to say that God is all-powerful, Logically, this includes everything we do, which leads to determinism.
That's like a whole separate kind of issue, right?
The determinism versus non-determinism, free will, all that sort of stuff.
Okay?
But it means that everything we do, including immoral acts and the things that Christians call sin, are also part of God's will.
And as most people understand it, this view of God undermines human responsibility.
Most theologians would say, and have said, Or at least felt a tension in the idea that, well, you know, God holds humans responsible for their sinfulness and the bad things they do, but God wills everything that happens.
He wills them to do those things, right?
Theological conservatives also need a place for human responsibility in their theology.
And again, not a theology podcast.
Those of you familiar with, you know, history of doctrine and the development of Christian theology, you'll know that lots of theologians have wrestled with this and tried to, you know, square this circle in lots of different ways of trying to say that God intends or wills everything that happens But humans are also still responsible for the things they do.
In my view, I'm just going to say it doesn't work.
I have never yet read a consistent theology about this.
Some theologians will bite the bullet and say, fine, God wills everything that happens, including our sinfulness.
Right?
Some of the hardcore Calvinists, that's you.
Good on you.
At least you're consistent.
Okay?
But that's the theological conundrum they're in.
Okay?
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And what happens is this, so when it's convenient to claim God's omnipotence, they do so.
When we're facing things that are difficult or unknown or circumstances that aren't of our own making and so forth, we rest on divine omnipotence and say, you know what, everything happens the way God wants it to happen.
But when it's inconvenient theologically, right, when it would make God responsible for evil or immorality or whatever, Then they just sort of set aside that part of their theology and appeal to human responsibility.
And it's just bad, inconsistent theology.
It is, in my view, an unresolved contradiction at the center of most conservative Christian theology.
Notice I didn't say it's a mystery.
I didn't say it's a paradox.
It's not something I think fits together in some sort of tensive way.
I think it's just straightforwardly a contradiction.
It is just like the square circle.
You can't do it.
You can't draw a square circle.
In my view, you cannot affirm somehow, consistently, everything happens because God wants it that way, and also say that people are responsible for acting against God's will in some way and calling that sin.
Okay?
So it's bad theology.
But who cares, right?
You're not listening to this because it's a theology podcast, right?
Some of you are trained in theology.
Most of you are not.
You don't care.
It's like, fine.
Who cares about bad theology?
These are arcane dimensions of a discourse that is itself arcane to most of us.
I just said theologians and philosophers have been arguing about these same issues for millennia.
At this point, who cares?
Why does it matter?
Here's why.
Here's why we're talking about it.
And this is what I take away from the things I've been hearing from people in response to that notion that we're right where God wants us to be.
It matters because bad theology hurts people.
And if I have to boil down sort of some of the driving impulses of this series, That's one of them.
The bad theology hurts people.
People want to go out and believe stupid things, inconsistent things, whatever.
Go out and believe those things.
But when they make you hurt other people, I've got issues with that.
Okay?
So as it turns out, Even for those who profess and I think think they believe or believe that they believe that God is, you know, causes everything that happens and so forth.
As it turns out, God isn't really in control of everything all the time.
It turns out that God gets all the credit when things are good or maybe the credit that he's going to turn around bad circumstances.
But when attributing something to God would challenge our notions that God is all-powerful and, frankly, very masculine, right?
We just throw this out there.
That notion of God, defining God in terms of power and omnipotence and so forth, is also a very sort of masculinist way of imagining God.
Whatever.
When attributing things that we consider immoral or negative to God, when that would challenge our conceptions of God, no, then we shift gears.
We say, well, actually, when that happens, it's our fault.
It's a system that works great for God.
God gets all the credit for things that are good and none of the blame when things aren't.
Okay?
But it also reveals what for me is the really pernicious element of bad theology, is that it's not just about theology, it's about social control.
Because when push comes to shove, this kind of choose-your-own-theology adventure, it shows us that the appeal to God's control is limited.
If everything happens because God has a plan, or better yet, if everything that happens happens according to God's plan, Because that's what that view of God's all-powerful nature is.
Everything that happens is a part of God's plan.
God planned it.
God did it.
God set it into motion.
That does mean that queer people in the church are a part of God's plan.
It does mean that hard questions posed to church leaders, questions that make them a little hot under the collar, that that's part of God's plan.
It means that those challenging the patriarchy of the church are part of God's plan.
It means that those leaving the church because of its practices is itself part of God's plan.
Confronting realities like these, when people who trot out the line, oh, wherever you are, God has a plan for your life, you're right where God wants you to be, and then somebody comes out and they're suddenly saying, oh, what do I do?
They're confronted with this, and they've got, in my view, three broad options.
One is to modify their actions and church structures because they do recognize that affirming God's plan means they have to face painful realities.
And there have been Christian traditions that have done this.
There are lots of Christian traditions that are open and affirming and sort of fully affirming of, say, queer folk.
And part of the reason is because some of the people in those traditions say, you know what?
We think this is, you know, these people are real and everything we know about science says that they didn't choose this.
It's not a lifestyle choice, what have you.
Therefore, if we're going to be consistent and say that, you know, God has a plan and that God creates people and all these other kinds of things, we've got to accept them.
And it means we've got to modify our structures and our theology to fit that.
That's one option.
Okay?
Another option, a kind of more radical option, and this is an option that kind of radical and constructive theologies play around with.
And if I ever still play theology games, this is kind of where I live.
They might come to the conclusion and say, you know what, the whole problem is thinking of God in terms of power and control and will in the first place.
Whatever God is, if we want to talk about God, we've got to get out of the notion that what makes God God is that God makes everything happen the way that God wants and so forth.
Or, and this is the third option, and I think this is, for popular American Christianity, the most dominant option, they will resort to coercion and control to preserve the pretense of their all-powerful God.
This third option is what theologically conservative, high-control religious organizations do.
So that when they're confronted with having to challenge their notion of God, their received notion, or challenging their practices or institutions, or just kind of setting that aside and attacking the people who raise those questions or, you know, Lashing out at the people who are doing things that they consider immoral or wrong or bad.
That's what they will do.
And this third option is what theologically conservative, high-control religious organizations do.
And I'm going to go further here, and I would say that bad theology, this theologically conservative theology, is part of what makes them high control.
Being a high-control religious environment follows from theological conservatism, in my view.
And that is why bad theology is so damaging.
It's damaging because that theology defines a religious culture that will preserve its vision of God at any cost, and that includes the expense of people who worship that God.
These are religious organizations that are willing to sacrifice those who are supposed to be in their spiritual care, all in the name of preserving their theological conception of who or what God is.
Those who espouse that theology, they can do so only at the expense of those who are supposedly in their spiritual care.
And for me, this is the logic of theological conservatism.
It ineluctably leads to control and coercion and damage to other people.
It also paves the way for those who maybe they don't really care about the theology.
Maybe they're just about control and coercion.
But then that kind of church becomes a safe haven for them.
They can hide behind that kind of theology to let themselves do the terrible things that they do to other people.
And I hear from people who talk about that all the time as well.
So, why does bad theology matter?
Bad theology matters because it hurts people.
Right?
And for me, this is why conservative theology and social control are so tightly bound together.
It also highlights for me why conservative theology can't be redeemed.
I hear from people all the time who want to develop kind of a kinder, gentler conservative theology, and I don't think it can be done.
I think it's fundamentally flawed.
I think it's bad theology, and because of that, coercion and control are the only ways it can be maintained.
Coercion and control are in the code of conservative theology.
They are written into it.
They are part of its source code.
You cannot alleviate those practices without having to change the theology itself.
All of this, tie it together a little bit here.
Got to wind this down.
A little bit weirder episode, like I say, for some of us.
I know it may be more theological than some prefer, but this is what really hit me when folks were talking about the ways that in their lives When certain things would happen, they would be told, oh yeah, you're right where God wants you to be.
But when they were really challenged with things, or they were posing hard questions, or they had loved ones coming out, or dealing with dependency, or whatever it was, that message that's supposedly supposed to be about hope and encouragement disappeared, and what they experienced in the church was condemnation and control and coercion.
I think this is why.
Because we have to ask hard questions about the nature of spirituality and religion and God if we're really going to affirm that, quote-unquote, we're right where God wants us to be.
There are ways to do that, but I think they're rare.
I think they're not practiced often.
And I think the much more common experience that people have, as I say, is that when push comes to shove, The Christians in their lives, those conservative Christians who are so busy talking about how God's all-powerful in control of everything, will set that aside and instead resort to hurting those around them to try to protect their image of God.
And I think the assurance is that they believe it provides, providing the social order they want, the church structure they want, the family structure they want.
Which would bring us into how all that relates to Christian nationalism, a topic I'm always happy to talk about, but a focus for another time and another place.
As always, I want to thank you for listening.
I want to invite your feedback on this topic or anything else that you think is relevant to the series or to the podcast in general.
Daniel Miller Swag, DanielMillerSWAJ at gmail.com.
Always excited to hear from folks.
Again, as always, we couldn't do this without you.
