| 
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| Brain Fight is brought to you by... | |
| Brain Fart Plus with extra fluoride so that your days are happy and dim. | |
| And of course, the formula that I developed myself, that's the Super Cuck Beta Mail that everyone should be taking so we can get our orders from Hillary and know that she wears the pants around here. | |
| Everybody knows... | |
| That, for many years, I played a satirical right-wing character, okay? | |
| This happened to me all the time when I played my right-wing character, talk radio host, Tuck Buckford. | |
| I had the story about lizard penises, and I was going to go to it next. | |
| I needed the lizard penis story. | |
| Reprint me the lizard penis story. | |
| Alright, don't hold out on me. | |
| I don't care how long this takes, they may miss the news live. | |
| Alright, good. | |
| I'm Tuck Bugford here at the Infowar Studios. | |
| Gave it to them, man. | |
| I gave it to them and I said I need these images. | |
| You're welcome to look at the lizard penis all you want. | |
| Yogurt. | |
| You can look, you can look, you can look, you can look, you can look. | |
| You can look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look. | |
| Now, I want to explain something. | |
| I don't know. | |
| Alex Jones stole my identity as Tuck Buckford. | |
| And then Stephen Colbert, who I went to high school with, he stole it back. | |
| Thank you, sir. | |
| Now, I want the one that says good luck charms. | |
| I need the one I had. | |
| In fact, I need that story or it's not good luck. | |
| You sure about that? | |
| I found it! | |
| You're right, it was in here, dude, but oh, not the one I wanted. | |
| Okay, you guys are really messing me up. | |
| And of course, did you think this manly man would lie to you about the theft of the lizard penises and the SWAT team raids? | |
| No, it's a real story. | |
| I'm not Alex Jones. | |
| I tell you real news. | |
| Tuck Buckford, don't visit InfoWars.com. | |
| Bing, bing, bong, bong, bing, bing, bing. | |
| In the last 20 years, InfoWars has paid its dues. | |
| We have proven that we are a cutting-edge news and information source. | |
| And when it comes to funding our operations, we take cutting-edge to the next level. | |
| With the highest quality supplements and nutraceuticals available, we have now more than 25 different amazing formulas available at Infowarsstore.com. | |
| And the flagship is Super Male and Super Female Vitality, where we take thousands of years of the ancient knowledge and use high-tech modern technology. | |
| We're making it easier than ever today with a special. | |
| We're running for two weeks only. | |
| 20% off on these formulas at InfoWarsLife.com. |
Export Selection