| 
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| Special assignment, ladies and gentlemen. | |
| Looking for the true patriots. | |
| Is the knowledge still alive and well? | |
| In the party scene on 6th Street in Austin, Texas. | |
| Can you name all seven continents of the Earth? | |
| Of the Earth? | |
| So there's Asia, Africa, South America, North America, Europe, Antarctica, South... no, wait. | |
| Oh yeah, Australia's my continent, is it? | |
| Asia? | |
| America? | |
| South America? | |
| Japan? | |
| Hong Kong? | |
| You know, Canada? | |
| You know, Africa? | |
| Three of the Bill of Rights? | |
| That would be... Man, you are picking a hard night for me. | |
| Can you name the Vice President? | |
| Dick Cheney? | |
| John Boehner. | |
| Was John Adams allergic to the peanuts on Air Force One? | |
| Yes. | |
| Yes. | |
| He was. | |
| I think that's how he died. | |
| Really? | |
| Yeah, the peanuts. | |
| That's tragic. | |
| It is. | |
| Somebody should have been on board making sure, you know, eating the peanuts before he did. | |
| Liam McAdoo? | |
| Hot. | |
| Everybody knows that. | |
| You remember when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? | |
| 1941? | |
| The journey to find some red-blooded Americans continues. | |
| When we fought Hitler, what war was that? | |
| World War II. | |
| Thank you very much. | |
| You're a true patriot. | |
| Of course I am. | |
| I'm an American. | |
| Are you? | |
| John Adams, was he allergic to the peanuts on Air Force One? | |
| No. | |
| No? | |
| No. | |
| You finished, but no, that's not my understanding of how he died. | |
| Who is the greatest president of the United States? | |
| Mandela! | |
| Well, we've had some very interesting responses out here mingling with the drunk and brainless, but the jury is still out on whether or not there is any hope for humanity. | |
| Now, if you've got some questions that you'd like us to ask these fine folks the next time we're out here, leave your suggestions in the comments below. | |
| Info wars! |
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