All Episodes
Previous Next
March 5, 2025 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux
31:36
Men Make Women Wear Makeup?
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Alright, good morning everybody.
Hope you're doing well.
So, we are the fifth.
This is just for donors.
If you've got questions or comments, I'm certainly happy to read them.
This is a test of a new platform.
As you know, Skype is going away, so we're trying a replacement and see how that goes as a whole.
And you can invite others if you want.
So, I'm just going to...
I've run through a little bit of the tech here.
Well, the tech's already done.
We did that.
But what I'm going to do is, you know, might as well get a few thoughts in while we're here.
And I'm trying to be patient with modern gender relationships.
It's a little tricky.
It's just a little tricky.
The reason being so, this woman had this sort of fairly popular tweets.
This one, 544,000.
The next one, 3.3 million.
And this woman wrote, women are choosing a job over their own children, but men are working hard for their families.
This is sexism.
This is sexism.
You know, it's a really tough thing when you're starting to talk about the same standards for men and for women.
So women are choosing a job over their own children, but men are working hard for their families.
Okay, who's going to raise the kids?
This sort of comes down to a fundamental question in life.
Okay, who is going to raise the children?
And if it's going to be men that are raising the children, then women are going to have to work hard.
I don't know how breastfeeding is going to happen.
I don't know how recovery from cesarean sections, childbirth as a whole, episiotomies.
Frightening to find out about, but apparently a necessary part of birth for some women, so who's going to raise their children?
And that's fine.
Now, if the women want to be the primary breadwinners, then they have to select men, to some degree, for low ambition and a certain amount of, it's hard to say passivity, a certain amount of Reactivity is probably the best.
So when you're in a business career, when you're running your career, you have to be kind of proactive, right?
You have to seek out your mentors and you have to study outside of just your job and you have to push for your raises and you have to push for your promotions.
You have to compete with other people.
So you have to be really, really proactive.
Now, parenting a lot of times is reactive.
And so if you want to be...
The primary breadwinner, then you have to be proactive to a large degree, and whoever is going to be raising your children has to be more reactive, right?
Because you really can't plan your day when it comes to having, let's say, you have a bunch of kids under the age of six.
I mean, obviously, there's some things that you can do to plan, but a lot of it has to do with, did they sleep well?
Are they under the weather?
What is their mood like?
And what is your mood like?
Did you get any sleep?
You're just kind of managing.
You're not really proactively pursuing a major goal because you're just in control of far fewer of the variables, right?
When you are a primary caregiver to children, and I say this having had a very assertive, if not downright aggressive career over the course of my life and also having been a stay-at-home dad, you are in control of far fewer variables when you are A primary caregiver to children.
I say this, of course.
I mean, I sort of mentioned this story years ago, but The Last Starfighter is a movie I've never seen.
I've only seen bits of it.
I wanted to see it, because, you know, it's video games, science fiction stuff.
But what happened was, when I was working at a daycare, I worked there for the whole summer, we took the kids all over the place, and it was a great deal of fun.
Really, really loved those kids.
And we went to go and see the movie The Last Starfighter.
And so naturally, naturally, I told the children ahead of time, hey, anybody who needs to go to the washroom, let's go to the washroom right now.
Make sure you go to the washroom, because, you know, otherwise you're going to miss parts of the movie.
Which I meant was, I'm going to miss parts of the movie.
So I planned to watch the movie, and I watched almost none of the movie.
Why?
Because I got this tug on the sleeve.
So-and-so needs to go to the bathroom.
Okay, I'm going to take him to the bathroom.
Anybody else need to?
Oh, no, no, we don't need to go to the bathroom.
We can come back.
Ten minutes later, so-and-so needs to go to the bathroom.
So it was just a constant not.
So I planned to see a movie.
Couldn't see a movie, right?
So that is just the reality of being a caregiver.
You are reactive, not proactive.
Now, if you want to know why men ask women out, And women say yes or say no is because the man, and why do men pay?
So the reason that a man asks a woman out is the man is showing that he is proactive and the woman is showing how she reacts, right?
Because the man being a career guy, even if you're just a hunter or a farmer, you've got to be very proactive.
You can't just be reactive, right?
You've got to go hunt.
You can't just be reactive.
So when a man asks a woman out, He's saying, I am proactive, I pursue what I want, and the woman is reactive.
She chooses yes or no if the man asks her out.
And of course, if the man asks her out and the man pays for the date, he's showing, obviously, resources and so on.
And she's showing, hopefully, grace and looking good and putting effort into conversation and being a good conversationalist and polite and grateful.
Because if a man is providing, if the woman is not grateful, then it's a bad situation.
It's a bad relationship.
So that's why men ask women out.
Because men are showing how proactive they are, and women are showing how graciously reactive they are, because parenting is mostly reaction.
Definitely when you're young, it's mostly reaction.
I mean, you may say to your kids, it would be good if you learned a musical instrument, but if you're a peaceful parent, for sure, You have to be reactive.
Do they have any interest in music?
And also, what kind of musical instrument do they want to play?
They might try, obviously, guitar or piano or, heaven help you, drums or trombone.
So, you are reactive because it depends upon what your children are into, what they're focused on, what they're pursuing, and whether you can maintain their enthusiasm because kids can start off very enthusiastic about something and then that enthusiasm can Fade away.
I mean, when my daughter was young, she composed on the piano.
She wrote, like, tons of stuff on the piano.
I thought it was actually pretty good and pretty nice.
But then she lost interest in the piano and got into other things.
Then she was really into writing stories.
She was really into...
She animated a bunch of movies and wrote and animated...
Wrote, directed and animated a bunch of movies.
And then she became less interested in that.
She's going through a writing phase at the moment, which hopefully will last.
But we'll see, right?
So, you're just kind of reactive.
So, if a woman wants to be a primary caregiver, then she needs to signal that she's assertive, maybe even aggressive, and absolutely proactive.
She needs to signal that.
And the man needs to signal that he's gracious in his reactions, that he will look good for her, That he will be a good conversationalist, that will be very grateful for her generosity and all of that kind of stuff to signal that they're going to be a good team.
So, if women want to be the primary caregivers, then women need to start selecting for reactive, somewhat passive relative to the aggression or assertion that's needed to pursue a career.
They have to start selecting for more passive men and they have to start being more proactive in selecting for more passive men, which means, of course, Women need to ask men out and women need to pay for the dates.
Because that's how you select the person who's best at staying home and raising the children.
You can plan your career, you can be proactive in your career, you can manage your career, but you can't plan for much when it comes to kids.
I remember taking a bunch of kids for pizza.
And just trying to get the kids to agree what should go on the pizza was Byzantine, right?
It was a crazy complex negotiation.
So you just have to be kind of reactive and manage all of that.
So then women need to select for reactive men.
Proactive women need to select for reactive men, which means women need to ask the men out.
And the men need to look pretty for the women and be good at conversation.
And be grateful for the...
Right?
But women don't want to do that.
Right?
Still, 90% of dates are the man asking out and the woman has the expectation that the man pays.
Now, again, this is sort of pointing out that this is kind of hypocritical, is kind of inevitable.
It feels kind of inevitable.
But nonetheless, this is where you see things really occurring.
This is where you see things...
What is really going on for people?
I watched the movie Baby Girl because I'm kind of fascinated about what women find attractive and appealing these days.
And of course, this is a hard-driving female CEO of an Amazon-style company.
And then she can only have sexual gratification by being ordered around by...
A tatted-up intern, like being ordered to lick milk off a bowl on the floor to be ordered around.
That's the only way that she can get sexual satisfaction.
And then she has one daughter who's hyper-masculine, one daughter who's hyper-feminine.
And this is just how it seems to go, that she has all of this dominance, but deep down she's yearning for submission, right?
Now, we can argue, is this right or wrong, good or bad?
But, I mean, trust me, man, they don't think...
Tens of millions of dollars into a movie and get, you know, genuine movie stars, like Antonio Mendez and Nicole Kidman, they don't do that without doing a lot of research and figuring out what is attractive for women.
Of course, they're a little bit there chasing the Fifty Shades of Grey stuff, but that's just reality.
That's just the reality.
So, yeah, men are working hard for their families, yeah, and women are choosing a job over their own children.
Well, they are.
Because somebody's got to raise the kids.
Somebody's got to raise the kids.
Alright, so then this other woman, Lauren, Gotham's Hitty, I suppose.
She posted this as a very big tweet.
Somebody posted, is this before slash after convincing enough for you to get Botox?
And this is a woman who took the Botox.
It's a black woman.
She took the Botox.
And she can't make any expressions, right?
So she's trying to look surprised.
She looks the same, right?
She's trying to get snarly.
She looks the same, right?
So the practice, and she wrote, the practice of paralyzing facial muscles to mute our natural expressions is, I think, a way patriarchal beauty standards erase women's individuality in favor of constructing a docile or docile feminine existence.
Oh my gosh.
So after, I don't know, Mary Shelley Wollstonecraft, Vindication of the Rights of Women, 150 years, 170 years, let's say 150 years.
So after 150 years of feminism, women are still blaming men for their own decisions.
Now, I don't think I've ever met a man.
Who prefers...
Have you seen these glow-ups?
Like a woman who looks kind of natural.
And then she gets a glow-up.
And the glow-up is, you know, puff-adder, lip filler.
It is, you know, really streaked hair, wild amounts of makeup.
And she goes from, you know, sort of fresh-faced local beauty to kind of weird, cute-y sex doll robot face.
And you actually can see this happening in some of the...
The MAGA women as well.
It's just not appealing.
It's not attractive.
It's not attractive.
So the idea that it is men who are demanding Brazilian butt lifts and the men are demanding these weird stuck-in-a-pool-drain pillow lips or that a woman can't make any facial expressions to remove a few wrinkles from her face.
And again, maybe there are.
I don't know, porn-addled men out there who just say, well, this is how it has to be.
But I don't see it.
I don't see it.
I've never really experienced it.
I've never, I mean, I've done thousands of call-in shows with people who are having, you know, these sort of major issues in their life.
I've not once had a call-in show with a guy who says, I'm no longer attracted to my wife.
Because we're aging.
That I'm not seeing.
Or, I don't want to kiss my wife because her lips are a normal human volume.
I mean, lips do thin out over the course of life, which is why the pillow lips is trying to reach for youth.
A woman who's with a husband who loves her for her virtues, Does not need any of this crazy stuff to be attractive.
I mean, obviously you need to stay in shape and relatively healthy and all of that gives you kind of a glow, I think, that's really attractive and appealing.
But my wife and I played sports with friends for two hours last night.
I mean, she's as healthy as they come and beautiful to me.
So...
The idea that men want this stuff and women just have to acquiesce.
This was an old Kevin Samuels thing when he was talking to the women in the black community, right?
So he was saying, like, men have been asking forever.
Men have been asking forever, don't be overweight.
Women are just overweight.
Men have been asking forever, just have your natural hair.
And black women have these weaves, like they cut their hair totally short and then they weave in this fake hair that is not particularly appealing to men.
And there's a variety of other things he asked for, and he was saying, like, you're just not providing it.
You're just not providing it.
So I think that women want to look a certain way, and they believe that that is really attractive to men.
Yeah, the nails, too, and all of that kind of stuff.
I mean, when women walk around in heels and then complain that their feet hurt, And heels can actually do quite a bit of damage to your feet as far as I understand it.
I don't think there's been a single man who says, I'm not attracted to my wife because she's not tottering around in these impractical heels.
That tends to be for other women, right?
And I understand the Botox thing and the pillow lips and, you know, like boob jobs and stuff like that.
I mean, I find that artificial stuff.
It turns my stomach.
I just find it absolutely repulsive because, to me, it shows a pathological insecurity and making up for a lack of virtue, right?
Because if you're virtuous and noble and kind and gracious and courageous and all that, that's just about as attractive as things can get.
So, makeup, right?
I mean, it's obviously not why it's called that, but to me, makeup is I'm making up for a lack of virtue.
I'm trying to be more physically attractive so that you'll overlook red flags in my personality.
Make up.
To make up for moral deficiencies.
That's what make up is for.
To make up for moral deficiencies.
So, I find Kevin Samuels, again, is a late great YouTuber.
He was constantly asking women that women would say, I want a high-value man.
A high-value man, right?
A man in the top 5% or 7% of income.
And he would say, what do the high-value men want?
A high-value man can pick from 20 women who all want him, right?
Particularly if they're older.
So, if it's all the patriarchal beauty standard, okay, that's fine.
So then, he asked women, Hundreds or thousands of times, he asked women who want the high-value men, what do the high-value men want?
And the women had no idea.
The women had no idea.
So, if you were running a magazine for women who wanted to settle down or whatever, then your articles...
Would not be about selling makeup, but it would be about, I mean, that would obviously be part of that to some degree, but the articles would be about, we've done a survey, here's what the men that women want, want from women.
You follow me?
Here's an article.
We've done our research.
Here's what the men that women want, want from women.
Do they want aggressive, Boss babes who make that, I really hate that face.
You know, that riot girl face, that tank girl face.
You know, I don't even know.
You know, just sort of the growl face or whatever it is.
You know, men don't want that.
I mean, there's a big debate on Twitter about somebody saying that a man would want sort of a calm, polite, even shy woman over an aggressive boss girl.
A hyper-aggressive or hyper-assertive career woman.
Why would you want that?
I mean, if you don't want kids, that's fine.
But the people who don't want kids are not generally part of social discourse because they have no long-term investment in the future.
So they're kind of hedonists, right?
And people who don't want kids are people who can't have kids.
People who don't want kids, they're just not really part of the social discourse as a whole.
As far as, I would believe all of the stuff about patriarchy beauty standards if women were very curious about what men actually wanted.
Now, if women were just like, do you want me to get pillow lips?
Do you want me to get buckle fat removal?
Do you want me to get a boob job?
Do you want me to get a Brazilian butt lift?
Do you want me...
To get, you know, crazy hair weaves and extensions or whatever it is, right?
Do you want excessive makeup?
Do you want, you know, that dead-eyed, smoky-eyed robot face thing, right?
And what do men want?
Well, I would believe that women were following patriarchal beauty standards if, A, men had power, much in society, and B, if women were constantly asking men what they want.
But let me ask you guys who are here, right?
I'd respond to these questions correctly.
Can you not do that?
Yeah.
So, have you ever had a woman ask you what you like to see?
What do you want to see?
How do you like me to dress?
What kind of shoes do you want me to wear?
How much makeup do you want me to wear?
Do you want me to dye or streak my hair?
Do you want me to get Botox?
Have you ever had a woman Who you have some sort of relationship with, probably either explicitly romantic or somewhat romantic or potentially romantic, more than just rather sister friend zone.
Have you ever had a woman ask you how you want her to look?
Someone says, oh, James says, I never had anyone ask me that.
I haven't dated anyone that went to those extremes, though.
No, no, I mean, so you've never dated a woman who uses a lot of makeup?
Yeah.
But never had anyone ask how they wanted her to look either.
No, no, no, right.
So, is it a patriarchal beauty standard if women aren't asking men what they want?
No.
So then, who is it for if women aren't asking men what they want?
And the other thing, too, is that you could argue that there was more of a patriarchy when women needed male resources in order to survive, but now that women can get mostly male tax money through the redistributive welfare state of various kinds, welfare, I mean, all of the transfers of goods and services from men to women, they don't need men for that, so they're liberated from that.
So, just to switch gears for a sec.
And the other thing too, if you're in a relationship with a woman, ask her, how does she want you to look?
It's important.
A couple of other things.
This is more of a short test, but I did want to drop by and thank you all for giving me this test and add a little value here and there.
Somebody wrote, so Trump is starting a 25% tariff on products from Canada.
Remember, Canada currently imposes tariffs of up to 270% on products from the US. Funny how the media does not cover that.
In the 1800s, writes James, he wrote, in the 1800s, 97.5% of all US revenue came from tariffs.
This is government revenue.
Almost 100% of revenue came from tariffs.
Now, in the chart of inflation from 1800 until now, inflation was about zero for almost the entire 1800s.
So they're going to say, oh my God, well, the tariffs are going to cause...
Inflation.
Well, maybe in a sort of pure free market.
Maybe.
Maybe it would have an effect, because it wouldn't be a pure free market if it was tariffs.
But the problem is, of course, if you're engaged in trade with China, and China massively subsidize its industries, and China, like, China used, in a recent three-year period, China used more concrete than America used in the entire 20th century, in a three-year period.
Like, it's insane, right?
So, if, if, A foreign country is massively subsidizing an industry.
That industry is going to destroy your local industry.
Now, that's one thing if it's a relative free market.
However, of course, if the government is now financially responsible for all the unemployed people, got unemployed insurance, they got a welfare, things like that, then subsidizing your own industry is now an act of aggression, if not downright economic warfare, against the other country's treasury.
because you knock out their industries by subsidizing your own, and then the government gets hit with all the costs of the unemployed people.
So, yeah, inflation was almost zero for almost the entire 1800s, even though almost 100% of all U.S. government revenue came from tariffs.
Just facts, right?
So, Clint Russell writes, Important stats to evaluate the trade war.
Sorry, I shouldn't laugh, but it's kind of funny, right?
So, Canada generates one-fifth of its GDP by selling into the US. Mexico generates more than a third of its GDP by selling into the US. The US generates just one-fiftieth, two percent of its GDP by selling into both.
Trade wars hurt everyone, but Trump has the cards and he knows it.
This will increase consumer prices, no doubt, but it has the potential to drive both Mexico and Canada into a depression, which is why they're panicking.
Trump intends to use this to negotiate border security and to bolster domestic industry.
Will it work?
To be determined.
But don't let people lie about who has the leverage here.
The US economy is the golden goose and the whole world knows it.
Yeah, I said this week, months ago, that access to the US market is the biggest value in the world.
So, yeah.
20% of Canada's GDP selling into the US, 33% Mexico selling into the US, US 2% selling into both.
So, it's not even close.
And this is why I think it's been really frustrating for Trump, knowing that they've got all this leverage and people aren't doing it.
They just aren't, aren't, aren't, I said leveraging the leverage.
Aren't deploying the leverage, right, if you have leverage.
And somebody wrote to Mike Madrid wrote, this is a very big tweet from a couple of days ago, I can't think of a better military investment than spending $175 billion to eliminate half of Russia's military capacity without a drop of U.S. blood.
Oh, these hawks.
Oh, these hawks.
This, to me, is a fundamental test.
Of empathy or understanding and processing the foundational existence of other human beings.
I mean, these are real people who are being slaughtered on this barely moving front.
It's a real human being.
And if it's like, well, I can't think of a better military investment, right?
Spending $175 billion.
To eliminate half of Russia's military capacity without a drop of U.S. blood.
Oof, man.
I mean, and this is also, I mean, this is another IQ test for me, is, okay, let's say that half of Russia's military capacity has been eliminated.
Let's just say that.
I don't think that's true, but let's just say that.
Okay, so what will they do?
Well, they'll go to robots, they'll go to drones, they've got a lot of great engineers in Russia, so if you eliminate half of Russia's Current military capacity, they'll come back with a different military capacity that may, in fact, and probably will be better.
So just this idea that you change a variable and they don't get to change a variable.
Right?
This is, again, to me, this is like selfishness, narcissism, sociopathy.
Like, well, only I am in control of these variables.
And I can change the variables, right?
Spend 175 billion to eliminate half of Russia's military capacity.
I can change a variable, but Russia can't change a variable.
Russia can't adapt.
Russia can't have its own response.
That, to me, is just complete narcissism.
Like, hey, so if I do this, what are other people going to do, right?
If I do this, how are other people going to react?
This is basic sort of public choice theory, right?
Which is okay.
So let's say, well, there's a small number of poor people.
We'll just give them a bunch of money and then we won't have any poor people.
And it's like, okay, but how are the behavior of poor people going to change if money gets handed out?
Like candy.
So, even if you could, like, eliminate half of Russia's military capacity, they will simply adapt to a different military capacity that is going to be kind of different.
Right.
And it says, Tyler says, Daryl Cooper made a great point on that.
Russia is now the only battle-tested power in a peer-to-peer war.
They can replace soldiers and equipment, and now they have modern warfare experience.
Well, yeah, so they've got to adapt their strategies to real-world conditions, and that's going to be wild.
I mean, it's sort of like, well, we don't have...
Because we have nuclear weapons, that means there will no longer be any war or social conflicts, but that's not how it works.
War and social conflicts switches to fourth and fifth generation warfare, which is about degrading institutions and demoralizing the general population and then all of the other things that are going on as a result of that.
Or the depopulation thing.
So if you can't fight people with nuclear weapons, you simply infiltrate their culture and convince the women to forego having children.
And you take them out that way.
So, it's like, oh, nuclear weapons means the end of war.
It's like, no, no, no.
The end of war just means it shifts to a different thing.
It's a strange thing that people just don't think, well, if I do this, what's the other person going to do?
What are other people going to do if I do this?
And I just find that...
Yeah, I mean, yeah, fifth-generation war right now.
Yeah, I'm Jack Pessoa because the guy to go to for that kind of stuff.
All right, so I just wanted to give this a test.
I think the technology is working well, and I'm very glad, of course, you are donors, so you get to skip the donation pitch.
And I really do thank you, of course, for supporting the show as a whole.
And I thank you guys for your support.
Thank you for dropping by this morning, and I hope you don't mind if I put this out to the general population, but...
It's nice for people to see what's going on with the donor shows.
And appreciate everyone's support.
We will see you tonight at 7pm for our usual Wednesday Night Live.
And lots of love from up here, my friend.
Take care.
▲
Export Selection