July 25, 2019 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux
05:16
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| I don't want to be, I don't think I'll be psycho mom, but I don't want to put this kind of perfectionism that I feel towards myself sometimes onto her the way that was done to me. | |
| Oh no, but you see, you won't. | |
| You'll learn from your child. | |
| Do you know why? | |
| Because you We'll be perfect to your baby. | |
| There will be nothing lacking. | |
| So you will hold your baby, breastfeed, cuddle, play with, eye contact, skin contact, all that kind of good stuff, right? | |
| Show of the world. So you will be perfect for your child. | |
| I didn't know what the potential for perfection was until I became a dad. | |
| You will be perfect for your baby. | |
| And that may be the first time you've ever felt that. | |
| That doesn't mean your baby won't cry. | |
| It doesn't mean your baby won't be upset. | |
| Your baby might even get mad at you, right? | |
| But you will be perfect for your baby, because that's how we're designed. | |
| We fit together like the last piece of jigsaw in a thousand-piece puzzle. | |
| So you'll be perfect for your baby. | |
| And once you have experienced that perfection that flows up in the generations, Once you've experienced that, because your baby is unbroken, your baby is undamaged, your baby is pure, your baby is perfect already. | |
| Your baby is born knowing everything that it needs to do to survive, to flourish, to connect. | |
| Your baby is born pure-hearted. | |
| Your baby is born with a near-infinite capacity for devotion, for connection, for love. | |
| And so once you experience the reparenting that comes out of being a parent, and the reparenting comes from the baby, Once you realize that unspoiled love and connection is the most perfect thing in the universe, you'll have a second round of mourning for what you did not experience as a baby, as a toddler, as a child yourself. | |
| But you will stand in that pool of infinity that leads down through the generations. | |
| And you will stand in the giant atoll of your baby's heart Who is delighted to see you? | |
| Who wants nothing more or less than your company? | |
| Who is connected to you in a manner deeper than the tides of heaven? | |
| You will experience that perfection from your child. | |
| And when you experience that perfection from your child, you will no more Be able to harm your child than you would want to start a fire in a beautiful forest or take an axe to a beautiful painting. | |
| Once you have seen the deep eternal mirror of that perfected reflection of a pure heart, You will gain three things. | |
| Love, trust, and courage. | |
| your baby will heal you and won't even know what she's doing. | |
| Wow, that is incredibly reassuring. | |
| Thank you. At least that's how it worked for me. | |
| I'm sure it'll work for you the same way. | |
| That's the beauty of parenthood. | |
| That's what makes it... | |
| In the early days, that's what makes it worthwhile. | |
| So worthwhile. So healing. | |
| And then because your baby is the complete opposite of your mother... | |
| You'll never become your mother. | |
| That's the inoculation. | |
| That's the antidote. My child is the complete opposite of my mother, which means my mother has no holds in our relationship. | |
| They don't even speak the same language. | |
| They're in opposite physics land. | |
| They're not even in the same dimension. | |
| They can't possibly overlap or interact. | |
| My baby is the inoculation against the return of my mother. | |
| It's beautiful. She's a gift from her first breath. | |
| From before her first breath, she was the greatest gift. | |
| And she doesn't even know. | |
| And that's good that she doesn't know. | |
| But that is your inoculation against your mother. | |
| Guaranteed. Okay. | |
| Thank you. You're very welcome. | |
| Keep me posted, will you? Yes, absolutely. | |
| I appreciate that. Thank you so much for your time today. |
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