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July 12, 2018 - Real Coffe - Scott Adams
13:54
Episode 136 - Ex-FBI Layer Lisa Page, and Elon Musk Replumbing Flint
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Time Text
- Do, do, do.
Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.
Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.
Well, you knew I was gonna come back this afternoon.
You knew it the moment you saw the President's latest tweets.
As soon as you saw it, you said to yourself, I'd better watch my Periscope alerts.
Because somebody's gonna be coming online to share a laugh and possibly a beverage.
I'll be having a ginger shot.
This is made from ginger, actually.
It's juiced.
Mmm. If you've never tried to drink straight ginger juice, Let me tell you, it's not easy, but it's very good for you.
All right, for those of you who have not been paying attention for the last hour, your president, who is overseas at the moment, has proven how much he loves us.
So even though he's away, he left us a little gift, something that we could play with at home, something that would keep us entertained, Probably through the entire evening and much of tomorrow.
Here is his tweet from not long ago, in the past hour.
He says, and I quote, It's only the first couple of words that matter.
So, we know that Lisa Page was an ex-FBI lawyer.
But the tweet doesn't say lawyer.
It says layer.
L-A-Y-E-R. And indeed, she was an ex-FBI layer.
Now, the big question of the day is...
And layer is capitalized, yes.
And so, given that the president has recently...
Said that he capitalizes to call attention to certain words.
It's unlikely he capitalized a misspelled word that is so clearly misspelled.
But maybe.
Maybe. It's deniable.
This tweet has been up for a while and I don't see it being corrected.
So that would suggest that he's the funniest president we've ever had.
Because I love the fact that he has complete deniability.
It's like, I have typos all the time.
You know, look at my tweets.
Typo here, typo there.
You can never tell.
Might be a typo.
Might not be a typo.
Can't tell. I see from the comments on Twitter that most people have decided it's not an accident.
And either way, it's hilarious.
If it's an accident, it's one of the best ones ever.
If it's intentional, it's even better.
Now I haven't seen the reaction yet From the president's detractors.
But I've got a feeling that it looks a little like this.
What?
What?
What did he say?
What did he say?
Ah! Ah!
He's yelling at NATO members.
He's yelling at Germany.
And now... Look at this tweet.
Look at it. Look at it!
He's a monster! He's a monster, people!
He's a monster! Scene.
So, I don't know about you, but I'm sorry, Fox News...
Fox News, it's not your night.
I know most of you probably, you know, you're Trump supporters, you might watch a little bit more Fox News than CNN. But tonight, tonight I think you'd agree.
CNN's the place to be watching.
So just look at the facial reactions.
It's going to be a full night of people actually urinating in their trousers on live TV. Some of you noticed that I tweeted I tweeted the president's tweet, retweeted it, and said if it's accidental, it's funny, and if it's on purpose, it's even funnier.
And Don Jr.
responded to that with a tweet, saying that considering the situation over there, it's probably not a typo.
Oh, my goodness.
So let's also talk about the other news that I think is only an hour old.
Somebody on Twitter asked Elon Musk if he could do something about the water problem in Flint because they've got lead in the water.
And Elon Musk tweeted, he said, consider this a commitment that he, Elon Musk, would pay for To replumb or remediate any house that's over the government's levels for lead, personally.
It's like, that just came out of nowhere.
You know, there's this gigantic problem, and Elon Musk is sitting there saying, well, I can go to Mars, I can build the first electric car that anybody cares about.
You know, I can build tunnels.
I can build hyperloops.
If you gave me one more day, I could have a submarine that would be the only thing you use to get people into caves.
I'm running out of stuff.
I've got everything just about solved here.
What else you got? What?
Flint has problems with the water?
Tweet. I will pay for all of your water to be fixed if you're above the government levels.
How do you hate, I don't know if anybody hates him, probably not, but how can you dislike a billionaire who does so many things that you like him to do?
It is so genius.
It's great. Now what it made me wonder is, I wonder what it costs on average to remediate a house that's got some kind of bad water situation.
I wonder what that costs per apartment or per house.
Makes me wonder how big that check is going to be.
Do I drive a Tesla?
I do not. I'm considering one.
Tesla's on my short list.
And I am in the market to upgrade my very old automobile.
I usually drive my cars until they just won't run anymore because I do not like the process of buying a new car.
And I'm not crazy about owning a new car.
I really don't like owning a new car because it's just one more thing to worry about.
I kind of like an old, you know, a little bit dirty, beat-up car.
It makes me more comfortable.
How old is your car? It's a 2011.
Not thinking of a truck anymore.
and now I gave up on the truck because I couldn't find one to test drive.
Ginger.
Ginger.
It's for your health.
It's worth the pain.
Somebody just had a very bad analogy between car buying and pizza buying.
That's a bad analogy.
Alright, so I didn't really have much else to say.
I just wanted to share this laugh about the President's tweet.
I was watching the horrified people who watched the President get tough with NATO on video, and they were acting shocked.
Shocked. It seems to me that the entire news on CNN is people being shocked at things that they ought not be shocked at.
Is that my imagination?
Or is there one side that is just consistently shocked at things?
I am shocked.
I can't believe he did that.
So I understand Croatia beat England in the World Cup.
Some say it's the Trump curse.
Maybe. Maybe.
Oh, on a completely unrelated topic, I was thinking of inviting Kathy Griffin on my Periscope.
I don't know if she'd say yes, but I could always ask.
And I wondered if you would want to see that.
So let me know if that is of interest or not.
Because I think that would be probably the most interesting conversation you've ever seen in your life.
But hey, I don't want to oversell it since I haven't even asked her if she'd want to.
Do it.
You'll break her. No, I wouldn't break her.
I like her. Okay.
I think it would be interesting for us to simply take a peek into each other's movie because, you know, we're clearly living in entirely different realities and she's a good sport and she might go for it.
we'll see I know it would be very watchable all right She's very funny. I've actually seen Kathy Griffin's show live.
She was in my neck of the woods a few years ago when I went to her show.
And she killed. She killed the whole time.
Audience loved it.
I loved it. I got to talk to her afterwards, say hi.
Alright, yeah.
So, oh by the way, you know the severed head of President Trump that Kathy Griffin held up for the photograph?
My understanding is that that was made from a Trump mask that they put on a dummy head and then they just added ketchup to it.
And I thought, well that's pretty clever.
So if you knew what it was made of, just a mask on a dummy head and a bunch of ketchup, you probably wouldn't be as offended.
But I think the problem was they did too good a job.
You know, if you'd seen the same thing in, let's say, a cartoon, And the head looked sort of cartoony.
You know, it wouldn't mean as much.
But because it looked so photorealistic, it just took it to a different level.
And I think that was completely accidental.
Because if you say, let's put a mask on a mannequin head and put some ketchup on it and take a funny picture, you're probably not thinking it's going to come out looking like the real deal.
But I guess when you add all the fake blood, it works.
All right. I'm going to sign off for now.
I just wanted to share the moment with you.
And that's all.
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