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Dec. 9, 2020 - Rubin Report - Dave Rubin
11:09
What DC Really Looks Like Under Lockdown, Dave Rubin Tours DC Swamp | DIRECT MESSAGE | Rubin Report
# washington dc urban decay sheila kuhl capitol building dave rubin gavin newsom government overreach judge jeanine pirro kyle kashuv mask mandates national mall outdoor dining pandemic restrictions political hypocrisy

Dave Rubin tours a deserted Washington, D.C., describing it as a "ghost town" and "zombie movie" alongside agent Kyle Kashuv. They note closed restaurants, boarded businesses, and restricted access to government buildings like the Senate, joking about mask mandates and adult acne. Encountering Judge Jeanine Pirro and a Periscope user, Rubin criticizes supervisors like Sheila Kuhl for hypocrisy regarding outdoor dining while speculating on an MMA fight with Gavin Newsom. Observing construction workers and unmasked individuals near the Capitol, Rubin concludes the lockdown has destroyed the country, expressing he would rather be a SportsCenter anchor than a revolutionary saving the Republic. [Automatically generated summary]

Participants
Main
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dave rubin
blaze 08:23
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Speaker Time Text
No Other Humans Here 00:08:09
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
How's it going, everybody?
It's your friendly neighborhood Dave Rubin.
You normally see me wandering the mean streets of Los Angeles with my dog, but today I am in the swamp.
I am in Washington, D.C., the most wretched hive of scum and villainy, and I am here wandering around.
First off, it's a complete ghost town.
There are no other humans here.
I'm in a zombie movie with no zombies.
That's what it feels like.
It's like, it has the eerie feeling of a zombie movie, and yet the zombies, I guess there's a little sun out so the zombies aren't coming outside, so I'm basically an I Am Legend right now.
I'm Will Smith and I need a dog.
I really do need a dog.
unidentified
There's... There's cracks in the street.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Plenty of cracks in the street in this dystopia.
Alright, well I am with another human here.
Alright, we got a thousand people in.
I am here with my agent slash bodyguard Kyle Kashuv, my secret service agent.
He's keeping me safe on the mean streets.
I will be shocked if you see another human in this video.
There's nobody anywhere.
Kyle lives here.
unidentified
If you don't wear a mask outside you'll be shot.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yeah.
unidentified
These are the rules.
Howitzer tank comes up and blasts you off.
Sometimes you go to jail if you're lucky.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
There's nobody here.
We could run D.C.
You think Trump's even at the White House?
I feel like we could just walk in.
unidentified
Nancy Pelosi's taking her 7th nap of the day in Calabasas at the moment.
She's not here.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Unbelievable.
You want to tell the people about your new mask problem?
unidentified
Yes.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
So Kyle's got an issue with masks.
You know, everyone, the mask thing, like I walked in, I went into an office and I did have to put a mask on.
I considered robbing them at gunpoint, but then at the last second I said, nah, I'll just go to the bathroom.
unidentified
My mask is not as bougie as Dave's.
Yeah, Kyle's got just the... But my issue, I've never had acne as a kid.
Never, never.
And now it's popping over everywhere.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Adult acne.
That's one of the side effects of this thing.
You know what I mean?
People talk about the side effects of COVID, but they're not talking about... Nobody talks about the side effects of my face breaking out.
unidentified
Now, obviously, COVID is real.
It's, you know... But, you know, this is... I can't wear makeup.
I can't.
I don't know how to put on makeup.
Right.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
So the question is, do you want to shut down the world economy forever and usher in a new world order and have acne at the same time?
unidentified
And then Amazon is gonna send you the skin supplies to, like, fix my face, and now this, this is the roundabout.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yeah.
Anyway, as you can see, we have not seen another human being.
There's nobody.
There's nobody.
There's, oh wait, there's one woman across the way.
unidentified
The only people who still are in D.C.
are lobbyists, and they're de facto zombies.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
So it is zombies!
Oh wait, I'm almost getting, oh there's a car.
There's a car with a man.
Alright, very exciting.
unidentified
We can't find a place to eat in, like, in D.C.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yeah, we're trying to find a place to eat.
We're starving.
Everything's closed.
A lot of things boarded up.
I just like a turkey sandwich.
Could I get a turkey sandwich?
A wrap?
Maybe a salad?
unidentified
Nothing is open.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
There's nothing, but we're out here.
unidentified
Listen, I'll take the phone.
Listen.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Look at this.
unidentified
It literally, it looks like... Every day we're fighting the good fight out here in D.C., okay?
Every day.
No, we can't cross.
We'll get run over.
Listen, we're here fighting corruption.
I'm here fighting skin acne.
I do a lot for the people, for the American people.
People don't respect that.
People don't appreciate the full extent.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
My audience respects it.
unidentified
For what I do for us.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Anyway, so I'm in D.C.
for about 24 hours this afternoon.
I'm going to the White House Hanukkah party.
We're going to celebrate eight crazy nights, uh, of those pesky Jews surviving the Greeks.
unidentified
If I post a photo that looks like champagne, it's not champagne, it's water.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yes.
Yes.
If I post a picture or a video drinking champagne, it most likely is champagne.
So yeah, we're, we're heading, we're heading to the White House in a little bit.
Um, I actually, just this morning I was just sitting having coffee at the, At the Trump Hotel, and I bumped into Judge Jeanine, who I've done her show a million times, but we'd actually never met in person, so it's kind of fun when you... No, no, we're going to a real restaurant, if there's a real restaurant.
But it's fun when you actually meet these people in real life, you know, because I think for you guys, too...
You just see, you see all of us.
How's it going, man?
How are you?
Alright, see, we saw real people!
We've been trying to find real people!
You guys are real human beings?
I'm on Periscope right now, is that cool?
Yeah, yeah.
So, finally, we were trying to find real people in D.C.
We couldn't find any.
You guys are real humans?
Not humanoids in any way?
Real fucking people, can you believe it?
Incredible, incredible.
Cool, good to meet you guys.
Alright, take it easy.
Real people.
Real Rubin Report people.
That's what I'm talking about, man.
Alright, that was incredible.
Did you see?
I touched the guy.
Do I have to disinfect my hand now?
unidentified
You probably shouldn't say that publicly.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yeah.
Why?
It was just a fist bump.
unidentified
No, I mean, now the FBI and CIA are on your ass.
Oh, God.
This is how Dave goes to jail.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
This is it, people.
This is it.
Alright, so... So, yeah.
So, I saw Judge Edine this morning.
And it's nice when you see, like, actual people.
I think one of the things happening right now is we don't see human beings anymore.
And if you do see human beings, you can see them like this.
And if they're wearing a hat, like this.
And with glasses, like this.
Now I understand why Kylo Ren took off the mask every now and again.
You know?
unidentified
I'm not there yet on the Star Wars episode, so I haven't seen it.
I'm working up.
I'm on episode six or five.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
You didn't?
Watch it, watch it.
Let's not get killed here.
unidentified
Look at this.
There's nobody anywhere.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Nobody.
There's a couple cars.
I don't know where they're going.
They're all fleeing.
Oh, by the way, if you see that little scar in my forehead, I was going to a rally in Los Angeles the other day.
The same day.
to rail against this woman, Sheila Kuhl, who's one of the city supervisors who shut down all the
all the outdoor meals, all the outdoor eating, and then she went for an outdoor meal. She literally
voted on it. This woman, who makes $300,000 a year to do jack shit, she voted to close all the
outdoor restaurants and then she went to an outdoor restaurant because she knew she had like a 24-hour
window before they all closed down.
unidentified
These people are major hypocrites or there's something that they know that we don't.
Like, they don't actually believe their own rules.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
No, none of it.
No.
People, they're middle management morons who can't produce so they want to control other people.
That's it.
But anyway, so I go to this, I'm on the way to the rally.
What Dave isn't telling you is he got into a fight with Gavin Newsom and he didn't want to say it publicly.
They had an MMA match.
on the side of the door.
unidentified
But Dave isn't telling you, because he got into a fight with Gavin Newsom, and he doesn't
want to say it publicly.
They had an MMA match, it was pay-per-view.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
I've been thinking about challenging them.
unidentified
They've won.
They've won.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
I would challenge Newsom or Garcetti to a duel.
Like, maybe that's where this is all headed.
You know what I mean?
Like, we'll just have to have public duels now.
Like, good sir, you've closed down all the restaurants while you were racking up $15,000 booze bills at French Laundry.
I challenge you to a duel!
unidentified
I would pay for this.
I would pay for this.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
People would pay for that.
It's the only way.
Anyway, I hope we see... It was nice, at least, that the only people we saw knew me, but where is everybody?
Like, is everyone just stuck at home?
Someone said my bodyguard looks high.
You're not high.
unidentified
I look high.
I'm actually not.
I'm not.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
No, no.
He's not high.
Actually, you want to know a little insider information about Us Twitter people.
We're like Twitter people.
We're going to the White House.
Kyle forgot socks.
Well, not forgot socks.
He only had, like, ankle-high socks.
unidentified
I didn't want to repeat.
I bought him... I only had these socks.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
...size socks.
unidentified
For the record, I was willing to pay for it.
Dave offered to pay.
So, obviously, I generously accepted.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Happy holidays.
And I forgot my belt.
And you can't go to the White House without a belt.
So, we went to H&M and we got the fanciest socks and belt.
There is nobody here.
I mean, I'm not, when I tell you this, I am not kidding.
There is, there is not a human.
I can literally run around naked in the street.
Passing a Suspicious Figure 00:03:14
unidentified
It's chilly.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Shrinkage.
But like, there is no buddy here.
Yeah.
Oh, here's a guy.
Here's, there's, I see one man.
We're about to pass a man in a little bit.
He obviously is a government agent.
Hold on.
Let me, I don't want to.
Speak too loudly.
He's obvious.
This guy's up to no good.
unidentified
Hold on.
Hold on.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
He's not wearing a mask.
unidentified
Hold on.
Hold on.
All right.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
You see him?
That was shady.
unidentified
I mean, this is how you destroy a country.
You just shut down everything.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Yeah, this is how you destroy a country.
I mean, everything is shut down.
I love D.C., by the way.
You know, I joke about the swamp and everything else and politics and all of that, but D.C.
D.C., you know, so where, what part of town are we in right now?
We're basically in Capitol Hill, right?
unidentified
We're near the National Mall.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
So we're right by the National Mall.
So the Capitol building, is that?
Right in front of us, that's the Capitol.
So that's the Capitol building right there.
Here, we'll walk towards that.
I mean, there's just nobody here.
unidentified
You can't even go, I'm trying to get my brother a tour, you can't even go into the Senate unless, like, you work there.
You can't.
You can't go inside.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Where's the Jefferson Memorial?
I know it's a little off the beat.
You know, maybe I'll do something in a little bit.
I got like two hours here.
Maybe I'll do something from the Jefferson Memorial, because it's not in the main path that all the memorials... Very far out, yeah.
People think of the Lincoln Memorial, obviously the Washington Monument, but the Jefferson Memorial really is wonderful.
And they have some of his writing etched in the wall, and it's really...
Quite amazing.
Do you know what any of these other buildings are?
unidentified
As long as we're here?
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Government bureaucracy everywhere, but that's here.
That's the Capitol so you can see it.
unidentified
That's the Capitol building right there.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
That's funny.
Someone made a good point.
I've got my bodyguard with me, but there's no other people out here.
unidentified
Yeah.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Oh, there's somebody doing construction.
That's good.
They're building the underground bunkers, I suppose.
Alright, we're gonna grab some lunch.
I assume, do people, you're allowed to eat?
unidentified
I don't know, we'll figure it out.
I don't know if you're actually allowed to eat inside.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
I feel like I'm in Reservoir Dogs right now with this guy.
Look at this.
unidentified
This is Mad Max.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
Alright, I'm gonna go eat something and then maybe we'll wander over to the Jefferson Memorial Or something else.
And I'll try to do something from the White House later.
We'll see what happens.
But anyway, man, it's weird.
It's weird.
This isn't how people are supposed to live.
You're supposed to live free.
You're supposed to wander around, have a little risk in life, see other humans.
God.
I had to be a radical revolutionary.
I just wanted to be a SportsCenter anchor.
You know that?
That's the truth.
I just wanted to be a SportsCenter anchor and now I gotta save the Republic.
What a headache.
unidentified
All he wanted was to plan the NBA.
Now he's doing live streams in Washington, D.C.
trying to save the Republic.
dave rubin ▲ ● ▼
I know.
I know.
Alright, guys.
Thanks, everybody.
We'll check in later.
If you're looking for more honest and thoughtful conversations about politics instead of nonstop yelling, check out our politics playlist.
And if you want to watch full interviews on a variety of topics, watch our full episode playlist all right over here.
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