| Speaker | Time | Text | 
|---|---|---|
| All right, the big day is here. | ||
| We're finally doing the Reuben Report Fan Show. | ||
| In case you missed it, a couple weeks back, I had asked you guys to let me know why I should interview you. | ||
| And I got to tell you guys, you did not disappoint me. | ||
| We got almost 1,200 responses within a week and ended up selecting 20 of you instead of the original five that we had intended. | ||
| 
             
                            
                                unidentified
                            
                         
                    
                 | 
        
        Alpha, how you doing, Reuben? | |
| It's good to see you. | ||
| Oh, man, he's got better hair than me. | ||
| I don't want to do this one. | ||
| 
             
                            
                                unidentified
                            
                         
                    
                 | 
        
        I'm not going to tell them that they're just misogynists and sexists. | |
| Can I say that? | ||
| You can say it. | ||
| Go crazy. | ||
| You can say more than that. | ||
| We did our best to pick an eclectic mix of people from all over the world. | ||
| 
             
                            
                                unidentified
                            
                         
                    
                 | 
        
        Oh boy, I'm the most unswedish weed you just could find. | |
| I didn't really think anything of it and then I heard more explosions. | ||
| If you see gyros that have like a lot of olive oil, avoid it. | ||
| I'm honored, really, to have such an incredible fan base that not only is connecting with me, but with each other as well. | ||
| 
             
                            
                                unidentified
                            
                         
                    
                 | 
        
        I have been using the women's restroom for eight years without any issue. | |
| Now I'm scared. | ||
| We have free healthcare, meaning the government takes over everything. | ||
| And that's exactly where I see people dying for lack of basic care. | ||
| I know the value of being a strong, independent woman, as cliche as it sounds. | ||
| And that doesn't involve safe spaces. | ||
| The first ever Rubin Report Fan Show is here. |