Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool

All Episodes

Previous Next

Jan. 1, 2015 - No Agenda

03:01:56

683: Team Taylor

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	Get some rockets.
	We'll give you some rockets.
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Thursday, January 1st, 2015.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination Episode 683.
	This is no agenda.
	No reruns or parades here.
	Just 100% live from FEMA Region 6 in the capital of the drone star state, Austin Tejas.
	In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
	And from Northern Silicon Valley, where it's 115, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	It's Craig Vaughn and Buzzkill.
	In the morning.
	Woo!
	Happy New Year.
	Happy New Year to you.
	Happy New Year to all the listeners out there.
	Happy New Year to the subs in the water, the feet in the air, the games at night.
	Happy New Year.
	What did you do for your New Year celebration, John?
	I worked on this show!
	Me too.
	Did you not go out at all?
	I did.
	When I finished closing out the spreadsheet at midnight, I did rush out to the front of the house because I have a view from here.
	I can see the other side of the bay.
	I could watch the diminutive fireworks display in San Francisco, which is as usual boring.
	It was too cold to stay outside.
	I came back inside.
	It was freezing in Texas.
	Oh, yeah.
	Apparently, it was almost going to snow in Dallas.
	And they canceled most of the New Year's Eve celebrations here.
	Oh, because it's too cold!
	Well, we had freezing rain, which I think is exactly what you want with fireworks, personally.
	Actually, you do, because otherwise a big cloud forms and you can't see the damn fireworks.
	Exactly.
	So I found myself at a private Texas party, which I think there's some things I need to share.
	You actually left the house?
	I did.
	With an Uber.
	Well, that's the way to go, but there must have been a premium.
	No, there was no surge pricing.
	But your name's not Surge, so why would there be?
	Well, you'd expect there to be some kind of surge just because people are going around using the service, not wanting to drive themselves for two reasons.
	One, because most people expected freezing rain.
	I don't think that happened until like five this morning.
	But great drivers.
	So where did you go?
	You went to some event?
	Yes, I did.
	I went to a party at a house in the hills.
	Let's just say a mansion.
	Hills?
	In the hills, yes.
	We have hills here.
	The Westlake Hills, I guess.
	I've seen those hills.
	Yeah, hills.
	And this was...
	They're usually preceded by kind of a square, triangular sign.
	Triangular sign says bump.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, right.
	Austin Hills.
	This is the kind of mansion that has a paddock in the backyard with a horse.
	A paddock?
	A paddock, yes.
	Does it have a helipad?
	That's even more important.
	No helipad.
	Although, I have been asked if I would be interested.
	You'd be interested in what?
	Landing a helicopter there.
	Oh.
	Yeah.
	Whenever people know you fly helicopters, hey Ben, let's land in my backyard.
	Yeah, okay, sure.
	So this particular party, a wealthy Austin socialite.
	A small party.
	A lot of people from West Texas.
	Now, if you live in Texas, then you know when somebody says people from West Texas were there.
	Well, that means to talk like this!
	No, no, no.
	Well, the West Texans I know talk like this.
	They all sound like Ross Perot.
	No, that would be incorrect.
	That's more North Texas because he was Plano, which is, you know, Dallas.
	So, no, not at all like Ross Perot.
	Okay.
	I'm sorry, I'm thinking East Texas.
	Yeah, Doug Dynasty is what you're thinking.
	No.
	Yeah, West Texas is different.
	West Texas is where all the money is.
	Where all the money is, John.
	It's wine growing, too.
	It's where all the money is.
	Yes, Texas where it's nice and dusty and there's lots of money.
	Well, and why is there money?
	Because there's dust.
	No.
	No, because all these people own property that have leased the rights for these fracking companies.
	Oh.
	So there are people just who are making a million dollars a month.
	A million a month.
	Just letting some derricks on their land.
	However, not so happy new year for these people.
	Land rights have not been executed.
	There's one guy, he has a drilling pipe company.
	He collects Teflon.
	And the Teflon he then sells to a fracking pipe company.
	He collects Teflon?
	Yeah.
	He has 30,000 pounds a month or something.
	I was trying to understand.
	Bring out your Teflon!
	Bring out your Teflon!
	I wonder where does one get excess Teflon?
	I don't know.
	Probably somewhere.
	Maybe at a gasket company.
	Orders canceled, postponed.
	So people are kind of freaking out because of this oil price.
	Everyone's, you know, the money has just stopped.
	And it will continue to stop.
	Yeah.
	So there was, the mood was somewhat demure.
	Oh.
	So it wasn't very festive is what you're saying.
	Well, there were a lot of registered nurses for some reason at this party.
	Just in case.
	He's keeling over.
	You know, nurses are great.
	I love nurses.
	I'll bet you do.
	Because, you know, it's kind of like a flight attendant.
	All you have to do is say, you know, you guys really are the backbone of the pharmaceutical or the medical, the healing industry, I think I said.
	And their faces light up.
	And like, yes, we get no props.
	Like flight attendants, if you say, you know, you are the people who will save us if we crash into the ocean.
	You will get us out on time.
	So when you say this to a registered nurse, they light up.
	It's great.
	Yes, yeah, exactly.
	You're just a flatterer.
	Yeah, I try.
	I really do try.
	Now, a couple of these registered nurses, I don't think they were all registered nurses, but there was...
	Texas women...
	And this was just a little different.
	The fireworks.
	They had their own fireworks.
	Oh, that's a party.
	Really expensive fireworks.
	But what's cool about them is that they were kind of like...
	Kind of like you'd expect from a big firework display, like a Macy's or whatever.
	But these were rigged, so they exploded at kind of the perfect height for residential.
	So it was your own private little thing, but it was filled with big starbursts and stuff like that.
	But they were lower.
	Yeah, much lower.
	Perfect altitude.
	So, you know, just kind of, oh, yeah, yeah.
	Just for our own little thing there.
	So that was nice.
	That is very nice.
	With an electrical board, you know, the whole thing.
	That was not...
	Well, yeah, yeah.
	Some pro was doing it, sure.
	It was actually some dudes from the party.
	Like, hey, we'll do that.
	Maybe that was arranged before.
	Maybe they were invited for that purpose.
	You could be.
	Could be.
	And, okay, so the women all brought food.
	There was enough drink.
	There was crazy amounts of alcohol.
	And weed.
	Very typical.
	Weed?
	Yeah.
	Weed?
	Weed, yeah.
	In Austin?
	Yeah.
	A big box.
	I would have never expected weed in Austin.
	Well, there was a big, like a hollow book.
	You know, one of those Sir Jimmy Hollow books?
	Yeah?
	Filled with weed.
	Yeah.
	I picked the wrong time to quit weed.
	This is good.
	No, it's not mead chatroom.
	They're thinking mutton and mead.
	No, no, weed.
	Weed.
	Now, so the women all brought food.
	And this is one of these places that had a huge kitchen with big, you know, multiple stoves and ovens and all professional looking stuff.
	First of all, there was some queso there.
	Now, if you know Texas, you can't kind of go anywhere without people whipping out the queso, which is pretty much melted cheese.
	But, oh man, this was like magic sauce.
	From West Texas.
	And then came the piece de resistance.
	The strippers.
	Oh, I wish.
	No.
	Although the registered nurses did tell me something funny, that every year at Halloween, their friends who are not nurses call them and say, Hey, do you have a nurse outfit left over that I can use?
	Like they have some kind of rack.
	You want the sexy one?
	They're all flabbergasted by this.
	They can't understand.
	Who do you think we are?
	But seriously, do you have one of those?
	Come on.
	Now, if you've heard of this, then you probably have.
	I had never heard of it.
	I had certainly never eaten this.
	There were a couple of women from Louisiana originally, so this is Louisiana cooking.
	By the way, if you say, I've been to New Orleans, it doesn't count as ever having been to Louisiana.
	Yeah, you've got to get out there.
	Yeah, that did not count.
	And if you've not heard of it, please don't look it up.
	Lost in the bayou, then you've been to Louisiana.
	If you have not heard of this, then don't look it up, because I just want to walk you through it.
	Turducken.
	Oh, God.
	Everyone's heard of this.
	No, I've never heard of this, John.
	Well, see, that's because you don't...
	Get out much.
	No, it's not it.
	It's been popularized at least for the last 15, I don't know, maybe 20 years by NFL football ex-coach announcer, now retired is how long ago, John Madden, who used to go on and on and on on TV about his turducken that he has every year.
	Well, okay, so I'm sorry.
	I'm behind the times.
	Let me ease everybody into it.
	I can see from the chat room not everybody knows what turducken is.
	Turducken is an abbreviation for turkey, duck, chicken.
	You can actually buy frozen turducken at the local store here.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Hold on a second.
	That is not how we do turducken.
	You don't do turducken.
	No, someone at the party brought the turducken.
	They had done the turducken.
	They had created the turducken.
	Fantastic.
	Now, did they do it right?
	Why do you mock me?
	This is old news, but was it de-boned?
	So you're saying that I'm just a stupid idiot for even bringing it up?
	No, no, I'm not saying anything.
	You're annoyed.
	Just to watch football.
	This is where you lose out.
	This is where you're annoyed because I bring something up that I didn't know about and you're going to scoff and mock me.
	Okay, good.
	Well, you do that.
	Okay, now I have questions.
	Was the turducken completely de-boned?
	Completely deboned, yes.
	So you could literally slice it?
	In fact, I stood while one of the women carved the whole thing down in chunks.
	So let me just explain.
	Turducken is a chicken stuffed inside a duck stuffed inside a turkey.
	What happens if the chicken's bigger than the duck?
	And then you stuff a beer can into the rectum of that whole contraption.
	And then you cook it.
	Well, you left out the main part.
	It's a boned chicken.
	Boned chicken, yeah.
	Stuffed into a boned duck.
	Stuffed into a boned turkey.
	There's no bones.
	And it congeals.
	And then when you slice it, it's kind of like a layer cake.
	But it's all, you know, it sticks together.
	Like, you've got a slice, and there's a slice of turkey, duck, and chicken.
	And here's the only thing I want to know.
	So, you and I are in Texas.
	And we're sitting around one day.
	Hey, Jebediah!
	I got an idea!
	Why don't we take this chicken and shove it up this duck's ass, and then we'll take that and we'll shove it up this turkey's ass.
	And then we'll, hey, I got this beer can, we'll shove that up the whole thing's ass, we'll cook it, it will be mm-mm good.
	That's just to stabilize it.
	Okay, turn duck in on the Wikipedia.
	Who came up with this?
	That's what I'm looking for.
	I'm looking for Dr.
	Gerald R. Lanasa, a New Orleans surgeon, was locally known for his...
	This is the guy.
	Yeah.
	Because he had his scalpel, he could debunk birds.
	But what?
	This guy, this guy at least took credit for it.
	This Louisiana, so it's a Louisiana dish.
	Makes sense to me.
	Uh...
	In the United Kingdom, a turducken is a type of ballantine known as a three-bird roast, or a royal roast.
	The Pyramid Company offered a five-bird roast, goose, turkey, chicken, pheasant, pigeon.
	Is this something from Old England?
	Stuffed with sausage.
	Well, this sounds pretty decadent.
	Let's go over this again.
	Juice, turkey, chicken, pheasant, pigeon.
	Wow.
	Stuffed with sausage instead of a beer can.
	Oh, man.
	So no beer can, sausage.
	Explain the stabilization part.
	I didn't quite understand what you meant.
	Well, the thing is going to fall into a flat...
	It's got to be propped up somehow, so you need something in the middle, the empty middle.
	Right.
	Right.
	To keep the thing, so it looks like a bird.
	In his 1807 almanac of gourmets, Gastronomus Grimaud de la Reynier.
	Yeah, that guy.
	presents his roti sans pera, the roast without equal, a bustard, which is like a turkey, a bustard stuffed with a turkey, which is a big giant bird, I guess, a goose, a pheasant, a chicken, a duck, a guinea fowl, a teal, a woodcock, a partridge, a plover, a lapwing, a quail, a thrush, and a lark, a plover, a lapwing, a quail, a thrush, and a lark, and an orderland bunting, and a garden Wow.
	Wow.
	Although he states that similar roasts were produced by ancient Romans, the roti sans parail was not entirely novel.
	The final bird is very small, but large enough to just hold an olive.
	Now, so screw you and your turducken.
	This is lame.
	Turducken is no good.
	It's totally lame.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	I just find the whole concept of stuffing a dead animal into another dead animal and then into more dead animals.
	It's like the first guy who said, that snail?
	That looks tasty.
	Let me try that.
	So what about oysters?
	Exactly.
	Same thing.
	And by the way, today is the beginning of the real oyster lovers one month.
	You know, that's funny because now I understand.
	They were eating oysters last night.
	And I'm like, that's strange.
	I thought it was strange, but is that a thing?
	You eat oysters on New Year's Eve?
	The French believe that January is the optimal month for eating oysters.
	Huh.
	And I've had oysters.
	I have oysters.
	I like oysters, but I don't.
	I like oysters, too.
	I usually eat them up in the Pacific Northwest.
	But John C. Dvorak's rule of travel.
	Oh, never eat oysters when you're traveling.
	Just don't take it.
	Any seafood, really.
	Any seafood.
	Shrimp in particular.
	Oysters.
	Anything.
	Any fish.
	Or seafood.
	It's just not a good idea.
	It's a bad policy.
	Seaman, also not good.
	Eat overcooked beef.
	So, really, if you look at it, although we dress it up in chaps and cowboy boots, we're pretty culinary here in Texas.
	Oh, yeah.
	It's like the South.
	All of the Southern United States is very culinary, even though much of the food has kind of lost its history and much of it is too fat.
	Right.
	And, you know, where you have, you know, donuts filled with, you know, sausage and things like that.
	There's a lot of crazy crap.
	I agree.
	But, yeah.
	Sounds like you had a good time.
	Yeah, it was okay.
	And then, you know, I was out in the hills and I flipped the app for Uber and this is...
	Honestly, this was 2.15.
	I mean, I was up late.
	And six minutes...
	There's the Uber guy.
	A great guy, by the way, who, you know, I start chatting with him and he's like, yeah, I'm doing this part-time.
	And, you know, and then he, I don't know, he's just a black guy.
	And he just starts laying into how pissed off he is about the, he's being half black.
	I'm like, okay, you got me now.
	Now you got my attention with your half black.
	And he's like, I'm so mad at people, my own community, they're all screwing around.
	They're not out there working.
	They just had their hand out.
	And then the president and Holder.
	I was like, wow, you watch Fox News?
	No, no, no, man.
	This is real.
	This is real.
	And I guess that leads me to another, I just have to call it the uncomfortable black man segment.
	Which I really like, because I feel it confuses people when you have black, well, it's black men in this case.
	I don't think we have many black women who get on TV as Republicans, which is, you know...
	Well, there's that really pretty black girl that used to be on Fox, and then she was a little bit on MSNBC, and I can't remember her name, but now she's a correspondent on The Blaze.
	Oh, okay.
	Well, I don't watch that.
	And she's very, very attractive.
	And she's black.
	So the one we haven't played is Jason Reilly.
	He is on the Wall Street Journal's editorial board.
	You know this guy?
	Yeah, I do.
	I've seen him a number of times.
	He gets a lot of play.
	Yeah.
	I don't know if he's a Republican or not.
	He's a Republican.
	I would say he's a Republican.
	And I just wanted to play a little bit of him because I love when this is played.
	And I think this was, maybe, was this on CNN? I can hardly imagine it was on CNN. But it just must be so uncomfortable for people who...
	Really, truly believe that, certainly in Texas, a bunch of white-privileged, honky, Ku Klux Klan motherfuckers out killing black people and gays.
	Because that's what a lot of people think of Texas.
	Yeah, of course.
	Yeah, here we go.
	Well, part of it is that the left has no interest in being post-racial.
	I think they pretend to want to be post-racial, but they practice identity politics, which is divvying us up by race and gender and sexual orientation and then making specific appeals based on those characteristics.
	So I think this whole notion that the left wants to be post-racial is false.
	And this is, I think, demonstrates that.
	With this false narrative being pushed in the wake of the Garner and the Ferguson incidents.
	The problem is not police shooting black men.
	That is not what is driving the homicide rate in this country.
	It is non-police shootings of black men that is driving the homicide rate.
	Yet we have protesters all over this country pushing a false narrative.
	And everyone from the president on down refusing to simply correct the record here.
	Tension between the black community and the police department stems from black criminality in this country.
	High black crime rates.
	Blacks are about 13% of the population but commit more than half of all murders in this country.
	Blacks are arrested at two to three times their number in the population For all manner of violent crime, all manner of property crime.
	If we wanna address perceptions, negative perceptions of young black men, we have to address the behavior that is driving those perceptions.
	And that is not a conversation President Obama or Eric Holder or Al Sharpton or all the rest wanna have because they have a vested interest in pushing a false narrative, which is that racism is an all-purpose explanation of what drives what's wrong in black America.
	Yay.
	By the way, he sounds a little gay there.
	Do you think he's also gay?
	No, he's got that California black accent, that's the only way I can describe it, that has a kind of a gay-ish quality to it.
	You know, this is all Finding Danny, and you can find these guys, and, oh, this is great, now I feel better because I put a black guy on.
	Yeah, of course.
	It's not for me.
	And he doesn't address any of the real issues, which is the education system that's delivered to the black community.
	It's just crap.
	Yes, but not just the black community.
	I'm sorry.
	The white community is pretty messed up.
	Whoa.
	You know, essentially, the school for the black community in most of the country is essentially pre...
	It's like, you have what's a pre...
	It was college prep.
	This is prison prep.
	And public schools, of course.
	Yeah.
	Prison prep.
	So I hope you weren't saying that I feel better by putting a black guy on.
	No, no, no.
	I'm not talking about the box or whoever it was that puts that on.
	Well, then I have Ben Carson, who I know you like.
	Ben Carson's the best.
	Right.
	So Ben Carson has been called, I think Touré called him Uncle Tom.
	Yeah.
	Which is exactly what you and I said.
	When a black guy goes on and speaks against, you know, certainly the mainstream media, you know, the narrative, I guess, is what people call it.
	It's Uncle Tom.
	So Ben Carson.
	And by the way, I think he's a retired surgeon, isn't he?
	I think he's still active.
	Okay, because he's on now wearing a doctor's coat, which I find a little like...
	I'm sure that wasn't his idea.
	Well, then he should reject that.
	Well, a lot of people aren't used to...
	Let me give some advice for people out there who happen to run into having...
	Hello, people out there.
	Advice coming down.
	He's 63, so he probably still is accredited.
	It doesn't say that he's retired.
	A lot of people that aren't used to dealing with the media...
	Whether it's the television or even the radio to a lesser extent, but the magazines, newspapers, they get pushed around.
	Yeah.
	And you end up with, you'll find yourself, you just say no, because they want to do an interview with you.
	Right.
	For whatever reason.
	And they're going to try to do things like make you pose for a stupid photo where you look like a moron.
	Yeah.
	And if you stand, oh, I got an idea, I got an idea, I got an idea.
	Why don't you put this on your head?
	Yeah.
	Hey, a fez.
	Good idea.
	And stand next to this guy over here.
	Or stand over here.
	Or stand over here.
	Okay, sideways, sideways, sideways.
	Okay, now move the hat.
	Move the hat a little bit.
	Okay, got it, got it, got it, got it.
	And so you end up with an idiotic...
	Because the photographer's got nothing better to do than look for children.
	He gets kudos from his buddies.
	Look at this stupid asshole what he did.
	Dude, excellent.
	Just say no.
	Eminem said he's gay, man.
	Perfect.
	Just say no.
	They're not going to kick you off the show.
	And if they do, too bad.
	So this is John C. Dvorak, media training advice.
	Quote...
	Just say no.
	Just say no.
	Perfect.
	So here's Ben Carson.
	Oh, well, there's no question.
	They feel that if you look a certain way, then you have to stay on the plantation.
	You know, I've heard some people refer to me as an Uncle Tom.
	Well, obviously, they don't know what an Uncle Tom is because they need to read Harriet Beecher Stowe's novel, Uncle Tom's Cabin.
	You'll see that he was very, very subservient, kind of go-along-to-get-along type person.
	Obviously, that's not what I'm doing.
	And what the left frequently does, and some aspects of the right, too, is they try to make life so unpleasant for anybody who disagrees with them that people will keep silent.
	And I know that it's working because so many people come up to me and say, thank you, thank you for having the courage to express this.
	Thank you for your courage.
	But most people won't speak up.
	I'm trying to get people to speak up because, you know, this country is changing into something else.
	And we need to make sure that we really want it to change into something else and not just end up there and ask ourselves, how do we get there?
	There you go.
	Ben Carson, everybody.
	Do you think he will be run as a presidential candidate?
	I don't think they can deal with him.
	No.
	I want to make a good, I want to correct, the Uncle Tom moniker is not, well yeah, it comes, it stems, mainly because I was at the University of California and I know about the way these things are used by the liberals, the progressives, whatever you want to call them.
	Uncle Tom was taken from the book, but it's not the character in the book we're talking about.
	And Uncle Tom is perceived as a person who plays for the other team.
	And not in a gay way, but in terms of a Republican.
	He's all for the establishment.
	He's for the exploitation of the workers and all the other rest.
	Every stereotype.
	And he's black.
	So this is bullcrap what he said in some ways, I believe.
	Because an Uncle Tom is somebody...
	I think what he's trying to say is, I'm not a pacifist, go along with the message, I'm the opposite, I'm fighting against it.
	Right, but that's because he's defining Uncle Tom differently.
	Right.
	He's defining it based on the book, Harry Beecher Stowe's Uncle Tom's cabin, which is nobody, even no one, I would guarantee that Touré has never read that book or cares.
	His definition of an Uncle Tom's guy.
	You're calling out the black man, dude.
	Touré is calling him an Uncle Tom because he's not agreeing with Touré.
	Right.
	Well, that would be the new definition, I guess.
	Don't agree with Touré, you're an Uncle Tom.
	That's good, I like that.
	Uncle Tom, don't agree with Touré.
	You know, Touré, he's from the spin cycle, or whatever it's called.
	Circle Jerk.
	Isn't that the name of the show?
	No.
	Crystal Ball?
	Should be.
	I don't know what she's doing there.
	Well, we got a new year, Adam.
	We do, John.
	It's 2015.
	And I was putting my clips together and I decided, hey, you know, there's a bunch of old clips from last year and the year before and the year before that I could pull out to show what kinds of things we were not, we've long since forgotten.
	Okay, I actually have one of those, but yeah, okay, good.
	You have one too?
	Yeah, I do.
	For example, the New Year's celebration.
	Did I get the new one?
	Yeah.
	Here was in 2013.
	It's two years ago.
	This is the New York New Year celebration.
	Outrageous aspect of why would you go to Times Square when this was the problem?
	More than one million people from all over the world crammed into several blocks around Times Square.
	Three hours before the ball dropped, there were so many people you couldn't get close enough to see it.
	And this year, there were no food vendors or public toilets.
	Oh, no!
	Wow.
	Well, two years later, nothing as much has changed.
	I have the regular clip, Times Square restrictions.
	Oh, sorry.
	And the good news.
	...in place, bomb-sniffing dogs, and radiation detectors in the crowd.
	Police will also be monitoring hundreds of cameras in Times Square from inside this command center.
	This, as protests against police are expected across the country, from New York to L.A., over what protesters are calling oppressive police tactics.
	Already in St.
	Louis, a group arrested after storming police headquarters.
	And back here in Times Square, the people here can't leave and come back, and no backpacks will be allowed anywhere near here.
	Again, the concern is that more than a million people will be here tonight, Elizabeth.
	All right, Gio, thank you so much.
	We're going to turn now to news...
	Do I get to tell my Times Square story from 1987?
	Yes, I would like you to go, and then I'm going to bring out the good news about all this.
	Why would anybody go to Times Square?
	Well, this is my story, 1987.
	I arrived at MTV in October, and a month ago I got set up, and my first big gig was live from Times Square.
	I was on Times Square by one Times Square.
	So they had the camera up in the one Times Square building, and I was down there by the recruiting station.
	You were on a platform?
	No, no.
	I was in the crowd, on the ground, in the crowd.
	Were there squealing girls?
	Yes, but there was none of this Nivea crap.
	This blue Nivea bullcrap.
	I don't know what you're talking about, blue Nivea bullcrap.
	They didn't have that this year?
	You know, the big Nivea sponsors that.
	I didn't watch that.
	Well, neither did I, but I assume that Nivea sponsored it again.
	They always do that.
	I didn't hear anything about Nivea.
	And they'd assigned to me an off-duty cop with a big-ass gun.
	Okay.
	And Paul Reiser.
	What was it?
	Tossing to Adam.
	Let's toss it to Adam down on time.
	Paul Reiser the comic?
	Yeah.
	Oh, it's typical.
	Whenever they're going to do a live show, they bring in celebrities who are anything but television hosts.
	And they suck.
	They always suck.
	So Paul Reiser, I think, maybe Sandra Bernhardt as well, who is definitely not good at just off-the-cuff, unrehearsed stuff when MTV wants to be, you know, trying to be a family-friendly...
	But anyway, I thought it was quite an experience because those were the days when, you know, there were hookers on Times Square and sex shops.
	Yeah, the place was really long.
	And it was grimy and grungy and people were just, you know, puking all over the place.
	You know, there were as many or even more cops back in that era in Times Square, but they didn't do anything about anything.
	It was a corrupt little enclave.
	It worked fine.
	Peep shows.
	Yes, it was good times.
	Crappy theaters.
	Good times.
	Porn shops.
	Good times.
	It was like Grand Theft Auto.
	It was realistic.
	Totally.
	And now it's like you think you're in Disneyland.
	With the rubberized tiles on Times Square.
	If you fall down in Times Square drunk, your head will hit rubber.
	You're not going to die.
	You won't even have a scrape.
	Yeah, back in those days, what you're talking about, there was blood everywhere.
	And a taxi cab would run over you, because that's kind of where Broadway and Seventh split up.
	Right, but now they don't even allow a taxi cab.
	You can't drive there.
	It's all walking.
	They ruined it.
	Yeah, they did.
	It's ruined, I tell you.
	People were peeing on the street.
	Oh, rats the size of dogs.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, good times.
	Crocodiles inside the sewers, ready to come out.
	I went...
	When I was in New York with Christina, we went around to see where we used to live and where the original MTV studio was, Unitel Video, 57th and I want to say like 10th or something, 11th.
	No, the other way, 2nd.
	Was it second?
	Yeah, by the...
	Was it the East River?
	No, I don't remember.
	But, you know, and now it's like, it's all big CBS corporate-looking building, and Tony's Deli is gone.
	You know, it's just been replaced.
	It's strange.
	Oh, reminiscing, sorry.
	Yeah.
	Onward.
	Well, back to the point that was made in the second report, the one from just recently.
	Backpacks are banned.
	And I just think this is the step in the right direction.
	And I've been wanting to talk about this for a while.
	I don't want to talk about it for too long.
	Don't worry, I'll stop you.
	You go on an airplane.
	Oh, yeah, I agree with this.
	Should be banned right there.
	Especially if you want a nice aisle seat.
	Here it comes.
	A-holes.
	Yeah, they turn around and the backpack hits your face.
	They're carrying some bag, or worse, they're rolling the bag that doesn't have the right width.
	There's two kinds of roller bags.
	One's a regular one that you can't really roll down the aisle.
	You should lift it up and carry it sideways and take it down to where your seat is.
	But these idiots...
	No, you should check the bag.
	You should just check the bag.
	These idiots keep trying to roll the bag, and they're hanging into the seats, and they're pulling and pulling.
	It's a joke, and then they've got the backpack on, and so they're swinging around back and forth, bashing into you.
	And I'm always on the lookout for one of them, and when one of them comes near me, and just approaches me, I push it.
	I just push it.
	I do.
	Really?
	Oh, yeah.
	And then do they look at you like, asshole?
	No, no.
	They say sorry.
	Oh, cool.
	I gotta try this.
	This is a good idea.
	I like it.
	When they're coming, I'm ready.
	And when the thing even gets close to touching me, I push it.
	And I push it really hard.
	And they say, oh, I'm sorry.
	Someone in the chat room just said, they're like drunk hunchbacks.
	Yeah, like donkeys or Sherpas carrying these stupid backpacks, and they're wandering down, walking down the aisle, swinging back.
	And then the worst ones are the ones who keep the backpack on, and then they lift up their roller bag, and then the backpack is in your face.
	And that's when I really push it.
	I say, get that backpack out of here.
	Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
	Wait a minute.
	Do you actually sit there and yell at them?
	Yeah.
	Say that again?
	That doesn't happen that often, but the pushing always, always pushing.
	How do you say that?
	Get that backpack out of my face!
	Anyway, but I'll push it, and I'll do the same thing with these women who have these huge purses, and they're swinging them around because they're on their shoulder.
	And I'll push them, too.
	The women never apologize, by the way.
	It's only the men.
	Oh, man.
	That's extremely annoying.
	These backpacks have become a plague.
	They're stupid-looking.
	I jumped the gun.
	I didn't know you were going to keep going.
	Backpacks have got to go.
	They're stupid-looking.
	Don't you cry.
	What are you going to hike?
	When they first came into Vogue, which is about 20 years ago, I always think, you saw them all over Berkeley.
	People wander.
	They're in grocery stores with this huge backpack.
	What are you hiking into Mount Tampa Bay?
	My favorite.
	What is in there that you've got to carry it around all the time?
	Well, my favorite is when you have the big backpack, and then on the front, you've got your kid in the sling.
	That's my favorite.
	That way you're balanced.
	Yeah.
	And it's always kind of like an effeminate looking dude.
	Man, my wife made me do this.
	There's a lot of people out there.
	I remember one time I was going back to New York.
	I remember there was this trend.
	This was about 10 years ago maybe, or maybe longer.
	There was this idiotic trend, I don't know if you remember it, of carrying a very small, dinky, diminutive backpack.
	The thing was the size of a purse, but it was a backpack.
	And it was more like a drawstring type thing?
	Is that what you're talking about?
	I don't remember it being a drawstring, but it wasn't like a backpack.
	Maybe it was like a drawstring, but it was over your back, and it was in the middle of your back.
	I think this was something that came over from Japan or something.
	Or Europe, you know, these things.
	Whatever the case was, I remember some woman wearing one, some...
	With a green piece patch.
	Wearing this thing.
	And it was a subway.
	We're taking the subway.
	And the subway was packed.
	And so she gets in on this...
	I'm still waiting for the next subway.
	And she gets in and can barely get in the subway.
	And then the door closes and squeezes the little backpack she's wearing and starts banging it.
	Bang, bang, bang into the backpack.
	And then a bunch of tomato juice down the backpack onto her butt.
	I'm thinking, well, there's justice.
	Oh, man.
	You know, that's almost as good as the turducken.
	Turducken, sorry.
	Turducken.
	So the trifecta really is the huge backpack, the kid in the sling, and the fanny pack.
	Yeah, you might as well just shoot yourself.
	Shoot the kid first, so there's no spawn of you.
	Yes, well, that's pathetic.
	Anyway, I've been meaning to bitch about that for a while.
	Yeah, well, you did.
	I'm very happy.
	That's a good point.
	So when I came back from Seattle, again, TSA pre-op the whole way.
	You got pre-check?
	Yeah.
	That was on Southwest.
	How does that happen?
	I think if you're a frequent flyer on Southwest and you've flown within the last year, they just put you on automatically.
	But this is bullcrap because you have not been interviewed.
	You are not an officially trusted traveler.
	You're a frequent traveler, but not a trusted traveler.
	So this would be my peeve.
	This is bogative.
	Yeah.
	You know what I got to say to that?
	Right on.
	Too bad.
	Hey, I want to say something to, first of all, everybody, hello everybody in Europe.
	Things change today in Europe.
	Big changes, particularly, well, first of all, we have Lithuania joining the Euro, which, now the only country in that basic region that is not on the Euro is Poland, of course.
	So we have...
	Oh, Sweden and the UK. That's it, in that region.
	Oh, okay.
	Right, so we have Lithuania and Poland kind of neighbors.
	And then, you know, Germany.
	So that's a change, and I don't know what Lithuania was thinking.
	Why would you want to join the Euro at this point?
	It just makes no sense to me.
	Well, if you could take it and get some free money, maybe, I don't know.
	I know the Greek thing is falling apart again.
	Wow.
	I could have gotten some old classic clips.
	So they're having a snap election because they couldn't agree on...
	Did the cabinet basically fall?
	Is that what happened?
	Because they couldn't...
	Or they could not elect a president?
	Something like this.
	Something like this.
	Let's take a look.
	And so, of course, we have the very...
	Greece dissolves parliament for January vote.
	Okay, so the cabinet fell, basically.
	And so they're going to have a snap election, and we have the radical guys, the dudes, who are saying, you know, we are going to get in and we are going to stop this austerity business.
	And, you know, of course...
	They should do.
	That's the way to deal with it.
	Yeah, well, they...
	It sucks.
	And they should just make it...
	It doesn't work.
	Bring back the drachma or whatever they use.
	What are they using?
	Yeah, it's going to be tough.
	But that's the only way, isn't it?
	I don't see any other way for them to get out of this.
	Hey, screw you, IMF. We're not going to implement austerity.
	No, there's no work.
	That country is dead.
	The country was doing very well, by the way, before all this began, when they started putting this austerity in and firing people, and then it just was a downward spiral.
	It was still the most productive country, statistically.
	Yes, they had worked the most hours.
	Yes, they worked the most hours, and they had high productivity for those hours.
	And that was turned around somehow.
	It was set up to fail.
	For some reason, they targeted them.
	You don't think it has anything to do with the Russians taking over everything in Cyprus and Greece?
	And the gas going through Greece?
	Well, yes.
	Yes.
	Of course it did.
	But no one ever really looks at that at any bigger level.
	Anyway, so they're doing it.
	They don't talk about it.
	There's something much bigger happening in Europe, which I got to tell you, I didn't even know.
	Maybe I knew it, but I didn't know that it happens January 1st.
	As of today...
	Well, you know what?
	Let me play a little clip here.
	This is from KPMG. It's a promotional video.
	KPMG are the, is that one of the last, the remaining top three accounting firms?
	Well, it's one of them.
	But I know Anderson's out.
	Yeah, they're out.
	Remind me, one day, my Anderson story.
	So KPMG is now talking to, they have several different products, but this affects any company, no matter what size.
	So if we were a company, which we're not, and we were operating in Europe, we would be affected by this law.
	And this law is something that is discussed quite often here in the federalized states of the United States of Gitmo Nation, which is, well, here it's sales tax.
	Then it pops up and, you know, do you want to be paying sales tax for something you bought in a different state?
	Well, the VAT now must be collected, reported, and, of course, paid after the merchant collects it, paid to the appropriate authorities in the appropriate country, The main compliance question a business will have to ask is whether or not they are going to VAT register separately in each member state where they have a consumer or non-VAT registered
	customer that's resident.
	Or whether they actually apply for what's called the mini one-stop-shop simplification scheme.
	Under either method, the business will still have to understand the VAT rates and particular rules of every member state that they're trading in and be subject to the audit of that member state.
	There's going to be quite an effect on systems and processes and this is fundamentally because businesses will now need to be able to identify where their customers are actually located.
	So you really need to start planning how your system is going to cope with the changes.
	And that could mean changes like introducing new VAT invoicing procedures or requirements.
	It could mean capturing and holding particular data, which helps you determine where your customer is located.
	Uh-huh.
	Can you imagine this nightmare?
	This is designed to ruin the smaller companies.
	Thank you.
	It's a big giant operations.
	They have all these systems engineered.
	They could do this because they can just cover it.
	Right, but they've come up with something called the one-stop small shop scheme or something.
	And why do they call it a scheme?
	I mean, come on.
	It is a scheme.
	Yes, it is.
	Being honest.
	It's a scheme scam.
	What is it called here?
	It's the one-stop something or other, which I guess is going to be some clearinghouse.
	It's going to be a test.
	That you have to pay.
	Yeah, and you'll be fined if you don't do it right.
	And you have to submit.
	They're going to run you out of business.
	You're going to have to just be a local little shop selling to the walk-by customers if you want to stay in business.
	And this is part of, I presume, the one digital Europe that they keep talking about.
	How does that even make sense?
	Because all these countries have different VAT rates.
	Some as high as 21, maybe even 23%.
	I think Belgium has 21.
	The Netherlands, I think, went back to 19.
	And then there's this crazy system.
	If you're an American and you're shopping over there, you can get these little chits.
	You show your password.
	Various techniques.
	I've never really completed this process.
	Have you?
	I have.
	Numerous times.
	I used to buy a lot of stuff.
	You mean back when the money was flowing, John?
	Back in the complex days?
	Yeah, that way you're buying this stuff.
	As far as I'm concerned, the way these rates are, if you buy $100 with some clothes or a jacket...
	Yeah, it's $21 of tax.
	It's $21.
	I want that money back.
	So you fill out the forms.
	Different countries have different ways of doing it.
	In one country, you show the passport and they somehow deduct it right there, but then they put some coupon or you have to, I don't know.
	What exactly is a chit?
	What is a chit?
	It's a little sheet of paper that's got something written on it.
	Because I remember the camera shops in New York, like the 7th Avenue camera shops, if you came in and paid some overblown price for something that you just couldn't get anywhere else, but you could haggle down 50% easily if you knew what you were doing.
	Then they had this additional thing was, well, okay, so if you don't pay with a credit card, of course, that's because they didn't want to pay any 3%, we'll give you this chit, and then you can recollect the sales tax when you leave the country, which I don't think that ever worked.
	Well, I do know that, I can't remember which country I was in, but I was at, I think maybe it was in England, but whatever the case was, You could do this.
	Oh, great.
	And you get these chits.
	And at the airport, you went to the airport to get your money back.
	The line was like two hours long.
	That's what it was.
	It was not encouraging.
	Yeah, wait a minute.
	And so you couldn't just hang around that long.
	You had to go to your gate.
	So that was a scam.
	But anyway, so just back to the back to the reality of this.
	This is a travesty.
	People should be rioting in the streets.
	How can you how can you really maintain a digital?
	How can you grow a digital economy when you have this crazy?
	You can be audited by a whole different country for your VAT if you pay that other country.
	Come on!
	It's a little schmuck selling beads.
	That's what comes after podcasting.
	Yeah, that's what we'll do next.
	Everybody, there's no agenda beads here.
	So I was blown away.
	I hadn't really even heard about it.
	By the way, Lithuania...
	Joining the Euro from our expert, our resident expert, they are, here it is, and this resident expert, of course, would be comic strip blogger.
	He says, Lithuania, you should have asked me why Lithuania joined Eurozone.
	I'm doing the comic strip blogger voice.
	Not quite.
	Because they are ready to pay any price to protect themselves against Russia.
	First they joined NATO, then the EU, now the Eurozone, so now full integration with West, and thus maximum protection against Russia.
	Okay, I would buy it.
	I actually could buy that because we're pretty good at scaring the crap out of everybody.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Hey, Russia's gonna get ya.
	And maybe they'll get some, you know, cool stuff.
	Hey, Russia's gonna get ya.
	Yeah, maybe they'll get some cool stuff, like some rockets or something.
	Get some rockets.
	We'll give you some rockets.
	Exactly.
	Hey, why don't we take a short break here, John?
	Since we are moving up towards 45 minutes into the first show of the brand new year.
	No, we haven't.
	But I would like to thank you for your courage and say, in the morning...
	Let me get to it.
	In the morning to you, John.
	See you later with your backpacks, Dvorak.
	And in the morning to you, Adam Curry.
	In the morning, all the ships that see, boots on the ground, feed in the air, subs in the water, and all the dames and knights out there.
	We have a lot of new dames and knights coming up for today's show.
	We do, indeed.
	In the morning to the chat room, of course.
	Taking no chit from nobody today.
	NoagendaStream.com.
	And in the morning to our artistes, Martin JJ. We used his work for the previous show.
	We had a lot of good art, actually, I think.
	Yeah, but JJ's one was just...
	Let me see, what was it again?
	It made it all come together.
	What was JJ's...
	You don't remember?
	I do.
	It was the Kib Jong-un star on the Walk of Fame.
	Right, the Walk of Fame.
	Very good.
	Excellent.
	Excellent.
	That's what happens.
	After a while, you get this knack.
	Oh, yeah.
	I've worked with a lot of artists over the years, and cartoonists are the ones that fascinate me the most, because you can give them an idea for a cartoon, and then they put it together, and you go, my God, how do you even conceptualize it?
	Right.
	Get this.
	It's just great.
	People don't appreciate it.
	John Chit Dvorak.
	I should have done that one.
	Damn, I'm stupid.
	Chit.
	Anyway, the noagendaartgenerator.com.
	Thank you very much, Martin JJ, and all artists who participate.
	Looking forward to the first new art for the new year, and of course, we also use these in other venues, such as the No Agenda Newsletter.
	We have a few people to thank.
	We have a lot of people that decided to become executive producers for show.
	Number one show from 2015.
	1-1-15.
	We're actually, people should note, we are actually working on New Year's.
	The stores are all closed.
	Nobody's doing anything.
	But we're here working on New Year.
	And I think that's kind of a testament.
	That's what we do.
	That's who we are.
	Right?
	Okay, yes.
	Foley!
	So you might as well play that.
	Okay.
	Sir David Foley came in with the most interesting of all the donations for today, 20.
	2015 is the year...
	No beats for you.
	2015.
	Yeah, that's cool.
	ITM, Happy New Year.
	Hopefully this donation will start off a new year in a great way.
	The Christmas show was excellent.
	Oh, thank you.
	That's cool.
	Looking forward to another year of deconstruction and insight and analysis from the best podcasts in the universe.
	You might as well just throw some karma his way.
	Heck yeah.
	You've got karma.
	The one thing I got from the Christmas show a lot of people were interested in, we talked about the silence of the noise gate.
	Not that that bothers people, but it bothers some people who are using Bluetooth.
	What does it do?
	Well, because our signal is all digital, and when the noise gates kick in, then it's not like it's just quiet.
	It's zero.
	So the zero signal is just zero.
	So it's going to be either one to some degree or zero.
	And when it's zero, many Bluetooth devices go, oh, time to go to sleep.
	They turn off?
	Yes.
	That's a bug.
	Well, I think it is too.
	I think that yes, you can have a battery saver, but it should be adjustable.
	So then what's happening is when we kick in again, then they're missing the first piece of the word because the Bluetooth is going, it's time to open up.
	I agree.
	You said it right.
	That's a bug.
	It's a horrible bug.
	And it happens on a Bluetooth device.
	This is digital technology.
	Bluetooth shouldn't be thinking, well, everything's analog, so there'll be some noise in there all the time.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	In 1950.
	Well, so here's what we can do.
	This is typical of this sort of thing.
	So the things we can do are just bitch and moan about it until at least this is...
	That's my favorite.
	I think you're right.
	It's a bug.
	I agree.
	It should be user configurable after a minute or something.
	And what is a minute difference going to make in your Bluetooth battery supply?
	Nothing.
	Well, we don't go a minute of dead air.
	That's my point.
	That's my point.
	So you should be able to set it to a minute.
	You shouldn't have to set it to anything.
	The users in today's world should not be setting these things.
	And the other thing we can do is I can mix into our signal a...
	A plus one?
	Yeah, like a plus 0001 something...
	Yeah, that would probably solve the problem.
	It's not solving the problem.
	It's solving our immediate problem.
	It's not solving the user's problem.
	We don't have users.
	Well, anyone who's using Bluetooth.
	It's not solving a problem for humanity, is what you're saying.
	Well, I just wanted to point that out.
	It's not solving the problem.
	I just wanted to point that out.
	It's a workaround.
	It's not even a solution.
	It's a workaround.
	But it's crap.
	See, right there.
	I agree.
	We were quiet and a whole bunch of people's Bluetooth just turned off.
	Coming in second in today's sweepstakes is Ass Crack in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin with $1,000.
	Thanks for getting people to think outside of the box that they want us in.
	So this guy actually came in on PayPal as Ass Crack.
	Ass Crack.
	Nice.
	And he's going to be nice.
	And he's now going to be knighted today, so he'll be Sir Ass Crack.
	To you.
	Cool.
	Okay.
	Steven Fettig and Ramsey Cain from another Wisconsin or a couple more Wisconsiners.
	Ramsey Cain, of course, is from the NoAgendaCD.com.
	Yeah, he is the NoAgendaCD.com guy.
	And I handed out these things all over the place.
	I gave them to people I was sitting next to in the airplane.
	I gave it to the person that checked my rental car in.
	Wow.
	Hey, there's that old kooky guy with the CDs.
	He must think he still works at AOL. Funny thing is, when you give somebody a CD nowadays, they light up.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Oh, it's like a gift.
	And they look at it.
	Oh, it's a gift.
	It's like, wow, what is this strange object?
	Huh.
	Yeah, no, I tell you, go give some CDs away and people will go, oh, thanks.
	They just light up.
	Yeah, I know.
	You said yeah, no.
	Did I say yeah, no?
	Yeah, you said yeah, no.
	You also did two essentialies earlier, right after each other.
	And by the way, I caught.
	But by the way, I think somebody came with a deconstruction of yeah, no, is yeah, I know.
	Yeah, but it's incorrect.
	It's weak.
	Let's not do it.
	I'm trying to switch, though.
	If I can say yeah, I know, I can catch that easier.
	Well...
	By deteriorating.
	By going backwards.
	It's weak.
	I just don't like it.
	We can be above this.
	We can do this.
	Well, yeah.
	Well, that's what...
	We can rise above this.
	Stephen Fettig and Ramsey Kane in Delavan, Wisconsin.
	Ramsey introduces you...
	They're brothers.
	They're brothers.
	I can assure you.
	Are you sure?
	Apparently Fettig is annoyed that his brother is...
	There's a blood feud going on.
	It's Abel and Cain.
	So here's my donation to attain knighthood.
	An extra month I would give Ramsey Cain...
	This came from Stephen Fettig.
	The same status in all seriousness.
	Keep up the awesome work.
	Love the show.
	So there he is.
	What he did is he donated enough to make both him and Ramsey a knight.
	Right, so there's a double name.
	That's cool.
	They were up to the point where...
	The blows were coming.
	Yeah, well, and then there's the brother.
	Yeah, let me just see...
	Hold on, let me just see...
	Do they have names?
	Let me just check.
	It's in the thing, yeah.
	They do have...
	Yes, so...
	I think it wants to be known as Sir Pants.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	Okie dokie.
	Yeah, but this just gets, we don't get into that.
	James Pyre, Sir Wire of the Hidden Jewel in Escondido, California, 33333.
	Beautiful.
	ITM, John and Adam, how I felt wishes for the holidays and Happy New Year's to you and your family space that you two are working over the holidays because you would miss each other if you didn't.
	Well, that's not entirely true.
	I don't think so.
	There are entire days that go by that I don't think...
	Wrong.
	Yeah.
	But I did miss the Christmas show.
	I missed doing a show, but not to...
	Well, yeah, I talked to you.
	You said that in the last show you lamented.
	I did not feel that way.
	No, well, you're...
	As far as I'm...
	You're jaded.
	You're jaded.
	No agenda education is the best schooling in the universe.
	Thank you for your courage, Sir Weyer of the Hidden Jewel.
	Oh, thank you.
	Okay.
	Very nice.
	Christopher Dolan in Berlin, Connecticut, which he must be, yeah, he's a knight.
	Yeah.
	33333.
	He'll be a knight.
	Yeah, I guess he will.
	Yeah.
	And he says, don't read on the show.
	Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
	He wants to be Sir Christopher Dolan of Pancakes.
	Got it.
	The best podcast in the universe.
	Sir Paul Boyer in Howell, Michigan.
	33333.
	Another one.
	This is a lot of 33333s.
	I just wanted to make sure the best podcast in the universe was a Happy New Year.
	Almost every show you guys say something that reminds me why I'm a producer and I wanted to take this chance to do it.
	I wanted to say I love the Christmas special.
	I have been listening since the beginning, and it was kind of fun to be reminded of how much this show has evolved and changed.
	Yes, it went from...
	Correct, correct.
	Well, you know, we don't talk about the news.
	To, hey, hold on a second, John, I've discovered something that's incorrect in the news.
	We should do this more often.
	Keep up the great work as I slowly work my way up to Baronet...
	Baronet C. Sir, Baronet C. Boat Nation Mitten.
	Mm-hmm.
	Sir Dr.
	Sharkey, hey.
	Jackson, Tennessee, 33333.
	MacDaddy and DaddyMac, I apologize for my absence.
	Over the past six weeks, I was taking a total news fast for my sanity.
	Not a bad idea.
	Unfortunately, the day I broke my fast, that was the day that we learned that North Korea had hacked our national defense computers.
	I mean, Sony.
	Bullshit!
	My first thought was bullshit.
	It's probably a disgruntled employee my no agenda super sense was right on.
	That's spidey sense, actually.
	Well, he says super.
	Yeah, I know.
	As I listened to your latest show at the time, where you were saying the same thing.
	Now, that meme is all over the news and the internet, so I'm back to listening on a regular basis.
	A lot of people have this effect.
	They drift away.
	Right.
	Yeah, they do.
	They have to be sucked back in, otherwise they start...
	I'm sorry.
	They get colds, they get the flu, they get itchy.
	All kinds of bad things happen out there.
	Oh, yeah.
	The rash.
	Rash.
	Rash.
	But I think the way it works is something shows up and you have the training, the eyes peeled, eyes wide open training, and you look at something and go, that's got to be bull crap.
	And then they're like, you know, maybe...
	Maybe the guys have been talking about it.
	You check back in.
	Lo and behold, you get confirmation.
	You're back on the train.
	You get confirmation in a big way with all kinds of backup details, which is important.
	Oh, yeah.
	With show notes to go.
	Yeah.
	True.
	True.
	Anyways, back to listening on a regular basis.
	Thanks for everything you do.
	I have a karma and have a karma-filled New Year.
	Sir Dr.
	Sharkey, Earl of Grantham, FEMA Region 4, the Tennessee Valley, and the Great Smoky Mountains.
	We'll roll it out for you.
	You've got karma.
	Zella in Fairfield, Connecticut, $300.
	John and Adam, Happy New Year.
	This donation brings me over the level of night.
	It's counting below.
	He's got it there.
	I wanted to complete my nighthood at show 666, but I'm an ass and didn't follow through, so I am through, so I am, so I though, what?
	Whatever.
	I thought that January 1st would be better.
	The show continues to be a great filter for the mainstream media crap out there.
	Mm-hmm.
	I've directed a number of folks to it in hopes of hitting them in the mouth, but alas, few have converted.
	Seems they may need a swift kick in the ass.
	If it doesn't work, just let it be.
	People that are already kind of thinking along the right lines, we just help them.
	These people have to be voted off the island.
	Someone's got to go.
	Please knight me a Sir Mad Hatter knight of the fifth column.
	Please serve sake and sushi at the table for me, if you want to write that down.
	I'm going to do that.
	I'd like to hear Orioles are more addicted than cocaine.
	Team Obama and...
	Team Obama and...
	I know what that is.
	...could use a whole lot of karma for 2015...
	We still have no house and I'm seeking a new job.
	So he needs job karma and then the cocaine thing.
	Yeah, your wish is my command.
	Oreos are just as addictive as cocaine.
	There's a need for a rescue mission.
	When the world is threatened, the world needs help.
	It calls on America.
	And that's the story.
	Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
	Let's vote for jobs!
	Rishi Nakra down in Los Altos, California, right down the street from me, $286.86.
	John and Adam, I am sick, so I better make this quick before the cough medicine knocks me out.
	I'm really grateful for being a No Agenda listener.
	Before I heard your show, I was listening to the other radio host from Austin, Texas.
	Even though he had on Cool Guests...
	I couldn't stand the crazy rants and hyperbole that was part of his show.
	What you do is what I want when it comes to the news.
	Straight up, no BS information.
	And I was wondering if I can get a hot chick karma.
	Spending New Year's sick and alone really sucks.
	I'm about to pass out from the medicine, so I better hit the donate button in PayPal before it's too late.
	Oh, no.
	Best regard, Sir Reichmeister.
	Yes.
	By the way, what does it come to become a Duke?
	What does it take to become a Duke?
	It takes 30 nights.
	Oh, no, 30.
	That's Grand Duke.
	I can look it up.
	All right.
	Give it up for Raven!
	You've got Carmen.
	That's all the hot chick I can think of.
	Where did that come from?
	Well, he wanted hot chick Carmen, so I gave him Raven.
	Actually, I will put a link in the next newsletter to the peerage.
	Yes.
	It's real!
	The peerage is real!
	Don't ever doubt it!
	It's happening now!
	It's real!
	Pedro Vaz in Coimbra somewhere.
	Is that Australia?
	$250.
	I do not know if I have an email from him.
	Portugal.
	I can see if we have something from Pedro.
	I don't recall anything coming in from Pedro.
	Pedro?
	Pedro?
	Last name again?
	Pedro?
	Here it is.
	Good.
	Here it is.
	This is, when did this come in?
	December 28th?
	Yeah.
	Just released a $250 donation.
	I don't think PayPal attached my note to it.
	Correct.
	The donation is to acknowledge the quality of your recent shows.
	Thank you.
	My daughter Emma was born today at 4 a.m.
	Central European time.
	So please add her to the birthday list.
	Well, okay.
	I don't know if she's...
	I don't think she is.
	I love you, baby.
	Props from my wife and the women in general.
	I don't know how they handle it.
	I think if men had to go through the excruciating pain of childbirth, the human race would have become extinct long ago.
	Please give karma to everyone for a better 2015.
	Sir and Dipity.
	That's who we're talking about here.
	I like that.
	Yeah.
	You've got karma.
	Let me put that in the list.
	I don't think Eric had that.
	So we have birthday.
	Let me just double check.
	No, we don't.
	So Sir and Dipity.
	His brand new human resource.
	Emma.
	Okay.
	And she was born on the 28th of December.
	You'll be associate executive producer with Sir Reichmeister.
	Nice.
	Eric Van Marder in Van Nuys, California.
	23456.
	Happy New Year, old crackpot and buzzkill.
	May I have two shots of 2014's ugly head and some karma for my best buddy, Mike, who got laid off before Christmas.
	Thanks.
	Yeah, good work.
	How nice is that?
	Eric, yeah.
	All right.
	You've got karma.
	Mm-hmm.
	All right.
	Actually, the Dame Melody man, who's now going to be renamed, she's a Baronetis.
	Damn it, Janet.
	23456 from Ringpool, Louisiana, and she sent a note in.
	Okay.
	Handwritten, along with an accounting.
	It says, Dear dude named John and dude named Adam, this is both handwritten and a drunk donation.
	Oh, whoa!
	Poor John, she says.
	Okay, here we go.
	I'll try to do it.
	Should I do it?
	No, I can't really do it.
	Dude named Pat.
	With today's contribution, I've given myself a birthday gift of nightly upgrade.
	You're not doing it drunk?
	I am drunk.
	I'm drunk.
	This is the way women are when they're drunk.
	I know I would ordinarily be a baronetist, but as more of your listeners are ordinary, and that's an unnecessary mouthful, I claim the title by might and main.
	Of Dammit, henceforth to be styled Dammit Janet of Transylvania and the Louisiana Purchase.
	You might want to add that to that.
	Hold on a second.
	This is not anywhere in my notes.
	Why would it be?
	I'm reading it now.
	How could it possibly be in your notes?
	Well, don't you send this stuff to Eric so he knows?
	Handwritten notes?
	No.
	Alright, so hold on.
	So what am I writing down here?
	How many people can read longhand but me?
	True.
	But what am I writing down?
	Who is what?
	Who is becoming what?
	She's going to become Dammit Janet of Transylvania and the Louisiana Purchase.
	Of Transylvania and the Louisiana Purchase.
	And she's a baronetist?
	Yes.
	As a gift to me, please play three oldies.
	Train's good.
	Don't eat me.
	And climate gate.
	And please give karma to all the other December babes who as kids only got one present to cover.
	This is true.
	Say this again?
	She says give karma to all the other December babies who as kids only got one present to cover both Christmas and the birthday.
	I know.
	It sucks so bad.
	It's horrible.
	It totally sucks.
	In the morning.
	I know.
	My sister's birthday is January 1st.
	Does she get two gifts or one?
	No.
	She's completely ignored.
	She's like, yeah, it was my birthday.
	Right, yeah.
	You're screwed.
	Imagine that she was born in 1967 in Uganda.
	Can you imagine what the hospital...
	Her middle name is Nankia.
	Can you imagine what it must be like in 1967 to give birth on New Year's Eve in Africa, in Uganda?
	My mom...
	She couldn't even talk about it.
	She couldn't.
	Who?
	My mom.
	It was such a traumatic experience for her.
	I bet it was.
	Just driving.
	Because there were all these bars, like shanties, next to the road.
	And I think they killed a couple people.
	They were just drunk and walked in front of the car and just driving to the hospital.
	Killed a couple Africans.
	Sorry!
	You leave a chit behind you.
	Yeah, there you go.
	Eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	To the gate, to the gate, to the climate gates.
	You thought karma.
	There you go.
	I threw an extra karma.
	And I'll give a...
	Hey, God!
	Just throw that in for the drunk thing.
	Eric Blake, Hopkinsville, Kentucky, 201.50.
	I killed your husband.
	Here's a chit.
	Nice.
	I sent in my $201.50 donation via my bank.
	It should arrive on the 26th or later.
	I've been listening for about a year and started donating when I picked up the show from the first episode via the NARchiveNoAgendaNation.com.
	I live close to Fort Campbell, Kentucky, and the 101st Airborne Ebola Division.
	Apparently it's the Ebola Division.
	Thank you for the show.
	Ebola!
	Please play Obama, A-Team.
	Oh, there's the team.
	And Karma, to thank the men and women of the 101st for their courage.
	Hell yeah!
	Well, then we should also play a little marching stuff for them.
	I think that's kind of cool.
	little march in fear is freedom subjugation is liberation contradiction is truth those are the facts of this world and you will all surrender to them you pigs in human clothing there's a need for a rescue mission When the world is threatened, the world needs help, it calls on America.
	And that's the story.
	You've got karma.
	Ah, damn it.
	What happened?
	Well, I wanted to register bitchit.com.
	Oh, BitChit?
	Yeah, I thought BitChit would be cool.
	Like a Bitcoin, only a BitChit.
	And it's already registered.
	Yeah, but it's already gone.
	Yeah, of course.
	All the Chits are gone.
	All right.
	When the Chits are down.
	Joshua Shiny in Kansas City, Missouri, $200.
	We have one more.
	But I don't know if there's an email from him.
	I didn't notice.
	Who are we looking for?
	Joshua?
	Joshua Shiny.
	Let me check my system.
	I'm going to look.
	I've been lucky with the system today.
	We should do this in advance, but we don't have time because we...
	We're busy preparing the show.
	And so when people send emails and they sometimes get missed...
	Hold on a second.
	What do I have?
	I got nothing.
	I have...
	Let's see what his email looks like.
	What's his...
	No, Josh.
	What's his last name?
	Shiny.
	S-H-I-N-E-W. And...
	Oh, okay.
	And I got his email.
	Let me look it up.
	I can't...
	I'm not going to say what it is.
	Please don't.
	But it starts with gloss.
	Gloss.
	Gloss.
	Okay.
	Yeah, it's very funny.
	Funny.
	Okay.
	I don't...
	Nope, nothing.
	All right.
	Sorry.
	Thank you, Joshua, for the $200.
	Christopher Peterson, Portland, Oregon, $200.
	You'll be a final executive...
	Sorry, associate executive producer for show 683.
	Hello, gentlemen.
	It has been a while since I last donated and have meant to go for a while.
	Today, however, I was listening to episode 680.
	Are you mocking us?
	Is he mad?
	I believe this is what he sounds like when he talks.
	He's not mocking anybody.
	When you played the costumed Megatron man making fun of the selfie girl, your generation is such a disappointment.
	Yes.
	I was in the frozen food aisle in the grocery store at the time and busted out laughing, which earned me quite a few looks from the other shoppers.
	I went home immediately and donated.
	Thank you for the show, and here's a prosperous new year if you have that clip saved, and I would love to hear it again.
	If not, please play one of your choice.
	Chris in Portlandia.
	You know, I think you told me actually to ISO that one bit about your view...
	Generation is such a disappointment.
	Yeah.
	I have the clip, though, of course.
	Let me just grab it here.
	Hold on.
	But I don't...
	Seriously?
	Come on, people.
	Ugh.
	What is...
	Ugh.
	Really?
	You don't even want to know what's going on.
	Hold on a second.
	Wow.
	So I try to open the clip, and I say, show me the original, which you can do in...
	And...
	Oh, wait.
	Maybe...
	It makes me so sad.
	I just want to open this.
	Open the mail.
	What do we have here?
	How disappointing your generation is.
	There you go.
	Nailed it.
	Yeah, you should clip that out.
	That is clipped.
	Someone made a jingle for us.
	Oh, cool.
	I have a note.
	Just a random note from Wesley Newburn.
	I just thought I'd read because it was sent in by over the transom, over the mail, over the mail system, over the snail.
	Sorry I haven't been able to donate.
	He sent us two little Christmas ornaments that were carved out of wood that spell out, shut up, slave!
	Nice.
	There's two.
	There's one for you, one for me.
	Are they identical?
	Yeah, they're exactly the same.
	Same from the same lathe?
	Well, it's a laser thing.
	Cool.
	Are you going to send that to me?
	Never?
	Yeah, no, I'm going to send it.
	Yeah, no.
	Yeah, yeah, I'm going to send it.
	I think you said, no, I'm not going to send it.
	Yeah, no, I'm not going to send it.
	That's what it sounds like I said, right.
	Eric's going to send it if anyone sends it.
	Right.
	Well, then I'll actually get it.
	I'll put it in a box of stuff to send to you.
	When the box gets big enough, I'll send them all.
	I think I have an extra challenge going for you.
	Sorry I haven't been able to donate recently, but I'm sending you these Christmas cards.
	If it fits the chips, you remember this, right?
	Chits.
	Horn and mints as a token of my appreciation for the show.
	I should donate more often, as every time I do, karma hits me in the mouth.
	The last time I donated, it was just before a trip to Vegas.
	My son is an aspiring chef, so I was treating him to a dinner at a certain angry man's restaurant.
	That would be Ramsay Gordon.
	When I saw that one of the side dishes was mac and cheese, I just couldn't resist.
	I got my Kobe steak with my side dish, and I sat down, and on my first morsel of mac and cheese, I heard a crunch.
	What the heck?
	I pulled out a one-inch piece of wire from my mouth.
	What?
	I showed it to the waiter, and the whole restaurant freaked.
	The manager came over to check me twice.
	End of story.
	We got five complimentary desserts and a whole $300 meal for free.
	No agenda.
	Karma works!
	Putin!
	I don't know why it felt good.
	I'd have to keep throwing a Putin there.
	I don't know what the Putin was doing.
	I don't know.
	I want to remind everybody we do a show coming up on Sunday.
	We'd like to see continued support.
	It would be nice if it was at this level.
	Dvorak.org slash NA is the place to go.
	Yeah, I'm going to give them a little karma for that.
	That was nice.
	You slaves can get used to mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese karma works, John.
	Mac and cheese.
	Shatter, melt it together.
	Mac and cheese, mac and cheese.
	Living the mac and cheese life.
	Mac and cheese by Ayn Rand.
	You've got karma.
	There we go.
	All right, everybody.
	Thank you so much.
	These, of course, are real producer credits.
	Executive producers, associate executive producers.
	It goes along with our peerage titles.
	All of this is real?
	It's real!
	And you can use these credits.
	You're getting a little better.
	I know.
	These credits are real!
	You can use them in Hollywood!
	You put a little echo on that.
	Yeah, it's good, isn't it?
	It's better.
	But I'm working on it.
	I'm working on it.
	It's still not quite the same, because the pacing of the...
	You're getting closer to the gravel, but not quite to the same pacing.
	But it's good.
	I'm working on it.
	Keep going.
	Yeah, I'll work on it.
	Dvorak.org slash N-A. So, of course, we all need people to go out there and propagate the formula.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Shut up, flame.
	Shut up, Steve.
	No, all righty.
	I wanted to talk briefly about Air Asia.
	Some people were expecting us to talk about it in some way.
	Mimi was complaining to me about the coverage that she says they showed actual bodies floating around in every news area, but in the U.S. they killed it all.
	No, that did pop up.
	It popped up on...
	Yeah, it's good.
	Popped up.
	I get it.
	But the best coverage, of course, is CNN. Whenever there's an aviation disaster, the no agenda...
	Oh, yeah.
	I saw this, too.
	You must...
	Because Richard Quest, who is doing meth again, this guy, he's on the air high.
	Is that what you're talking about?
	What?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I was watching him.
	I didn't think he was on meth.
	He's always been this way.
	Now, you're saying he was always on meth.
	No, I think he...
	There's a couple of episodes.
	I saw him...
	Maybe it was last night before I left.
	And he looked high, man.
	And he draws these things out of this long...
	Oh, he's an old lady.
	He's like a stand-up guy.
	He's an old lady.
	You're right.
	He's an old lady.
	Yeah.
	Okay, so I just want to say a few things.
	First of all, surprising, they really haven't found much.
	You know, and it's a little dubious as to whether they've...
	Really located the wreckage, you know, the sonar, yeah, maybe, yeah, no, we're not sure.
	There's this picture of the Indonesian soldiers carrying, that's really gruesome, I felt, the two coffins, and one has 001 and the other has 002 sign on it, and they have one blue suitcase.
	So not exactly, you know, great.
	You'd think there'd be more stuff.
	You'd think there'd be more stuff.
	Now, what is coming out now, and this is not flight data recorder data.
	It is not a so-called black box.
	But looking at some of the ADBS tracking systems, which are notoriously, they can be off and really wrong.
	We saw this aircraft...
	All of a sudden descend between 5,000 and 6,000 feet per minute.
	This is outside of the envelope of the aircraft, and the forward speed was, I think, 61 knots, which means this thing was going straight down.
	No forward speed, just nosedive, or who knows.
	I think it had to be a nose.
	Straight down, and the aircraft is coming apart in this trajectory.
	Here's the thing that I don't think anyone has really explained this.
	When you learn how to fly, and of course I learned in the UK and the Netherlands and Belgium, there's a lot of inclement weather.
	And you learn weather.
	It was one of the main tests.
	You learn how to fly, you learn engineering, electronics, you learn human performance, and you learn meteorology.
	And when you are flying for the first time, your first cumulus nimbus cloud is pointed out, which this thing, the top of these can be in space.
	Yeah, nimbus.
	That's the cloud.
	In space.
	And it's pointed out to you, and here's what every single pilot has learned.
	That sun is something you do not fly into ever.
	And of course you go, why not?
	Clouds are fun to fly through.
	Yeah, but you could fly into that and you could be shot out into space.
	Or you could be shot down and driven into the ground like a spike.
	Because that's the fierceness that is going on inside that cloud.
	So for anyone, and I heard this last night, well ATC was wrong!
	They killed all these people!
	No!
	Pilot always in control.
	Any pilot who thought it was a good idea to fly into this thing, 20,000 hours this guy had?
	No.
	I can't believe that any airman purposely said, oh yeah, I can make it.
	No, it's just that you don't do that.
	Ever, ever, ever.
	You swing to the left.
	Whatever you have to do, you do not go into that thing.
	So I'm puzzled.
	When and if they find the flight data recorder, then we will have some more information, although strangely the reports are already saying, well, this flight data recorder may not be very useful.
	I'm not sure why they're saying that, because there's all kinds of data.
	It's not just the basics of direction, speed, etc.
	There's a lot more information that can be garnered from this.
	But what it looks like is they went into the cloud and the cloud shot them because you could easily be popped out of the top.
	And you might live.
	People have lived.
	Guys have gone in and thrown out at 60,000 feet and somehow they made it back.
	And you can live.
	But that's not really the, you know, that's the exception to the rule.
	So, this is very curious to me that any pilot would make that decision.
	Especially with all those hours.
	Precisely.
	That's, there's no guy, I mean, you can go through storms and wind situations, but you don't know what's on the inside of that cloud, which is why you were trained.
	It's just a couple things you don't do.
	You don't go in.
	And I can, if this is what happened, they're winning.
	You can go around.
	Well, yeah, that is...
	No, no, you must go around.
	No, no, you do should go, right.
	You must, not should, you must.
	I was in Texas, coming out of Texas once, and we were on some flight, and there were some Nimbuses.
	But they weren't the big...
	There was just a huge pocket of tons of clouds.
	And the pilot, I guess, was given the go-ahead.
	He warned everybody that he's going to go around all these clouds.
	And it'll be for about a half an hour.
	Right.
	And it was one of the greatest flights I've ever had because we were banking and we go around.
	And you're looking at these clouds right off the side of the plane.
	And then you bank the other way and go around another one.
	It was one of the most pleasant flights I've ever had.
	There was no turbulence.
	He didn't hit any of the clouds.
	But he was just going around and around.
	It was quite entertaining.
	And you get to see these clouds out the window.
	Nasty looking, some of them.
	Well, I find them quite beautiful, really.
	Yeah, well, some of them are...
	But even, you know, you can...
	So if the tops are still below 40,000 feet, you can go over them, although usually not recommended because they can...
	All of a sudden, it's 50,000 feet.
	They can go pretty quick.
	But I find it just beautiful to watch.
	Now, someone in the chat room just pointed out, you know, today's planes do a lot of flying themselves.
	Maybe this was not a pilot decision.
	I don't know.
	Maybe there was an Airbus.
	God knows what this plastic plane is thinking.
	I think I can do it.
	Running Windows NT. Yeah.
	Hey.
	Yeah.
	There you go.
	So anyway, I just wanted to make sure that everyone heard my...
	I think that's good that you did this.
	Yeah.
	Just so you have a little more information.
	And now we can all go back to looking at Richard Quest and just visualizing him with his...
	With his nutsack tied to his neck with a dildo in his boot and meth in his pocket, being arrested in New York City.
	Because that's all I can think of when I see the guy.
	Well, it's pretty disgusting.
	No, you don't know that.
	Have you ever done meth?
	I'm not going to do meth.
	No, I don't think so.
	I just asked if you had ever done it.
	No, I've never done meth.
	Oh, okay.
	All right.
	It's just like taking too much amphetamines.
	How do you know?
	Makes you feel like a million bucks.
	It's an amphetamine.
	They're all the same.
	It's all from the same family of drugs.
	Really?
	I thought meth was like some hallucinogenic crazy crap.
	No, it's just another amphetamine.
	Hmm.
	Methamphetamine is what it is, only it's in the form of a crystalline substance, but it's still meth.
	It's Adderall, homemade.
	Oh, so it just makes you jumpy.
	Makes you jumpy, makes you feel good.
	Oh, that's why they call them tweeters.
	I can fight that guy.
	Exactly.
	That's not what Adderall does.
	No, Adderall's been blended back to do other things, you know, but it's still amphetamines.
	It's not good.
	These things are not good drugs.
	These are horrible drugs.
	No.
	They were given out freely in the 40s, apparently.
	Methamphetamines?
	No, it was benzodrine.
	Ah, Benny's.
	Benny's.
	Banny's was the original.
	Apparently when you were in the Navy during World War II, you'd just go to the supply room and you'd get handfuls of these things so you could shoot the guns.
	Like M&M's.
	Nice.
	Let's go back in time.
	Oh, hold on a second.
	We want to do that properly, don't we?
	Do you know what year we're going back to?
	We're going back...
	Well, in this case, we're going...
	It's probably further back than this, but the clip we're going back to is from 2013.
	Going back in time to 2013 with another historical clip from John C. Dvorak.
	I kind of...
	I'm not happy about the fact that we don't get these clips like this as much as we used to, and I'm going to try to change that because I think this is one of the great clips ever on the show, and I want to remind people that the show has been doing this for seven years, and we've been digging up stuff like this for your entertainment purposes.
	This was a kids' show.
	This is a kids' children's cartoon show called Liberty Kids that was showing the history of the United States during the Revolution, and it had all kinds There's nothing seditious about an intelligent woman wanting to keep well informed.
	That's for Black Dick to decide.
	Boson, pass the tow line.
	Black Dick?
	That's what the sailors call Admiral Howe.
	Give us Black Dick and we fear nothing.
	Why do they call him Black Dick?
	Perhaps he has a dark temperament.
	Hold on.
	Nice.
	Give us black dick and we have nothing to fear or something like that.
	I think this evolved into something Christina and Mickey and I started doing at Nobu in Los Angeles.
	Although this is...
	No, wait.
	Maybe it was 2013.
	No, we weren't in Los Angeles.
	We would go to Nobu and ask for black cock.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I have one, but this comes with a little bit of a setup.
	This is 2010.
	This is a clip that you often, often I say, have called for.
	This is the clip where Dianne Feinstein asks this panel including, it starts off actually with the Blair guy.
	Wasn't he the director of Intelligence?
	Yeah, it had all the top directors.
	It had the head of the army, the head of the chief of staff, the intelligence guy, CIA guy.
	I don't know if the NSA was there.
	And the chief of intelligence.
	It was all of them.
	They're all sitting there at a Senate hearing.
	So hold on a second.
	second as we go back in time to 2010.
	All right, here we are, 2010.
	Now, Dave Jones sent me a note to accompany this clip.
	What is your belief that this clip says?
	That we're going to have a terrorist attempt in the homeland in the next six months.
	And the question she asks is the following.
	What is the likelihood of another terrorist attempted attack on the U.S. homeland in the next three to six months?
	Three to six months.
	This was, of course, 2010.
	Now, I've always thought these guys immediately went in and said, oh, yeah, yeah, definitely, it's happening.
	That's not exactly how it gets set up.
	And Dave Jones says he believes that this Blair guy is a genius the way he deflected the question and set up all the other answers.
	Here it is.
	High or low?
	Director Blair?
	An attempted attack, the priority is certain.
	An attempted attack.
	If you listen to the whole thing, he says, an attempted attack, the priority is certain.
	Yep.
	Exactly.
	Blair?
	An attempted attack, the priority is certain, I would say.
	What does that mean?
	It doesn't mean anything, but it's beside the point.
	They're scaring the public.
	Mr.
	Panetta?
	I would agree with that.
	Mr.
	Mueller?
	Agree.
	General Burgess?
	Yes, ma'am.
	Agree.
	So, yes, no, but it's better because they're scaring the public by not really saying anything scary.
	Well, yeah.
	That's great!
	I guess if you want to call that great...
	But it's still the same old thing that we've been following on the show, which is needless frightening of the public.
	Yes.
	In fact, I have, what was the one, what do you think, in fact, this one I forgot all about, in 2012.
	Uh-huh.
	Do we need to go to 2012?
	Do we need to travel?
	Yeah, 2012.
	Hold on a second, we need to travel.
	And now January 2012.
	There we go.
	Ladies and gentlemen, we now travel back in time to January 2012.
	What was the big fear in January 2012?
	I have a clip here with Judith Miller kind of outlining what she thinks about it.
	I said she's part of about four quotes, but let me say what it was so the clip makes some sense.
	In January 2012, we're being scared to death by our own government that the Iranians were going to bomb the crap out of the Strait of Hormuz and wreck the world's economy any minute.
	Toronto's been flexing its muscle, Judith, now for years and years and years.
	I mean, they threaten us like four or five times a week.
	Why this time are we paying such close attention to this threat?
	Well, because, in fact, one-fifth of all the world's oil moves through the Strait of Hormuz.
	And because, let's face it, Trace, if they actually carried through on this threat, it would be regarded by many states as an act of war.
	And this situation could escalate very, very quickly into full-blown military conflict in a very sensitive part of the world.
	So it is something that the administration is watching very closely.
	Oh, man.
	That was good times.
	Good times.
	This is the kind of bullcrap.
	We always forget about these old...
	These crazy things that make the public nutty.
	The straight of her moves.
	It was going to be bombed.
	What were we going to do?
	This is almost as realistic as the Stargate in the Gulf of Aden.
	Which I still believe will happen one day.
	Yeah.
	You know what's going to come out of that Stargate?
	What?
	Fish.
	Yeah.
	Thank you.
	We'll be here all week, everybody.
	Okay.
	Can I bring us back into today's world for just a little bit?
	Yeah, I'll do this more later in the show.
	And now, ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to 2015!
	There you go.
	We're back.
	All right.
	By the way, I wanted to say a couple things about it.
	I do have a list of events that took place in 2014 that everyone seems to have forgotten about.
	And it's like, oh, it was big news at the time, and now nobody cares.
	But I can't travel back to 2014.
	We just got to 2015.
	Right.
	But I do...
	Can you hold on to it?
	This is something else.
	Okay.
	I do have a word of the year that I think will continue through 2015, but you have to guess what it is.
	Word of the year.
	Okay.
	And you're going, and it's not essentially.
	Hold on a second.
	Word of the year.
	Word of the year.
	All right.
	You have to guess the word.
	And this is Jake Gillianthal, whatever his name is, the actor on the Today Show.
	And he says the word of the year a number of times.
	You have to figure it out what the word is.
	So I get to play the clip and then guess?
	Yeah.
	The clip is only 12 seconds long, you must say.
	Yeah.
	Can I guess the word before I play the clip then?
	Sure.
	Okay.
	So the word, is it a word we've used on this show?
	Yeah, all the time.
	We try not to use it.
	Is it Yeno?
	No, that's not a word.
	Oh, that's right.
	Is it essentially?
	I said to introduce the segment, it's not essentially.
	Sorry.
	I'm a little angry.
	The minute you introduce the segment, my brain was already thinking.
	I couldn't listen to you anymore.
	Well, this is not new.
	You get one more guess.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	You're going to be very, now that you're guessing, you're going to be extremely annoyed that you didn't get it.
	Yeah, I know.
	I said, yeah, I know.
	I know, that's what I want to say.
	Yeah, but you don't.
	I know.
	Yeah, no.
	Well, I mean, the easy guess would be selfie, but that can't be right.
	No.
	And the fact that it works, just first and foremost, is such an amazing feeling.
	And the fact that it gets acknowledged in any way is pretty amazing.
	But the Golden Globe is even cooler because my sister got nominated, too.
	So that's pretty amazing.
	Oh, my God!
	And what douche knuckle made this word of the year?
	I did.
	Oh, man.
	It's not an official thing.
	Yeah, you fool.
	It's no agenda official.
	Okay, that's right.
	Well, I got some things.
	You know, I did one of those NA things.
	You know, like, ah, I gotta go look at these.
	Who are these people?
	What's going on?
	All right.
	It's all yours.
	The show's yours.
	You say, take the wheel, Curry.
	Take the wheel, Curry, and drive it.
	Drive that sucker.
	First, we have this report, which continues.
	This is so underreported.
	This is Euronews.
	North Korea's leader has used a New Year speech to announce that he's open to resuming peace talks with South Korea.
	As the North remains under the spotlight over claims of cyber threats against the U.S., Kim Jong-un spoke on state television.
	The comment comes days after South Korea proposed to restart dialogue.
	And there you go.
	This is the reunification talks continue, which, as we know, is very bad for sales.
	This is not good.
	They need to stop talking about this.
	Otherwise, arms sales will be reduced in that area.
	In the tank.
	Yeah, you lose money on this.
	And we have to sell to Japan because Abe has changed the constitution.
	We have to sell to South Korea because they're taking over OPSEC. Probably Philippines would be a good market.
	Tons of...
	Even China, maybe.
	Yeah, China, yeah.
	They got their own stuff.
	They probably just casually would be a great market.
	Right, right.
	Just for some of the outliers.
	Hey, man.
	Okay, so the FBI, as we all know, has been brought into question...
	Regarding the forensics they presented, and we have this one company, and this is of course the company I looked into, who says, no, no, no, I'm sorry.
	This is, you know, you're wrong, FBI. You are wrong.
	And let's hear, this is a short bit where the FBI is, they're just holding on to what they think is right with a, this is a step-in for the State Department.
	Who is it?
	Jeff Rathke.
	So both the girls are out.
	And Jeff Rathke is the one now having to hold down the fort.
	Confusion is that a private company called Norse combed through the malware that helped hackers access and erase so much confidential information on the Sony servers and they concluded that a lot of detailed insider information only available to a Sony employee was used in the hack.
	Now, one of the cyber intelligence And experts from Norse told FoxNews.com they briefed the FBI about their findings for two or three hours on Monday in St.
	Louis.
	But the FBI is still blaming North Korea, and so is the State Department.
	The United States government has concluded that the North Korean government is responsible for this attack, and we stand by that conclusion.
	And there are other private security firms who share the FBI's conclusions that North Korea is responsible.
	So this debate is not over.
	Now, when I heard that...
	Who are these other security...
	Right.
	So when I heard that, I didn't really care so much, but now I cared a lot more about this Norse outfit.
	Have you looked at Norse?
	We talked about this on the last show.
	I went online and looked at these guys.
	You brought up Norse before.
	I don't think we actually looked at Board of Directors.
	I don't think we looked at Board of Advisors.
	I don't believe we looked at that.
	And we certainly did not discuss the dark Viking tool that they used to approve.
	If you go to norse-corp.com Yeah, I'm there now, as a matter of fact.
	Okay.
	Yeah, I looked at it.
	We didn't go into this.
	I was looking at it.
	You were already discussing, Norris, and I found these guys to be a bunch of sales clowns and some other miscellaneous guys.
	I mean, they obviously got out in front of this whole thing and pushed it to get a bunch of free publicity when we were citing some blogs done by real security experts that had already deconstructed this to show as bogus.
	And so I guess Norris jumped on board...
	I just want to point out the people, because we did not discuss specifics.
	No, we didn't.
	We passed it over.
	Okay.
	So we have the most interesting ones are Robert F. Lentz, president of Cyber...
	These are board of directors.
	Cybersecurity Strategies.
	So he's in a think tank that advises people to use these guys.
	He was the former security officer for the Department of Defense.
	Where he oversaw the department's $3 billion cybersecurity program.
	Yeah, that's the guy you want on board.
	Then there's Howard A. Bain III, which I can only think is a Bain man.
	But then this is interesting.
	Henry Marks.
	This is the entertainment company connection.
	They brought in a guy who, you know, I love his bio.
	And because you can see how a Silicon Valley firm goes, yeah, this guy's great.
	We need him on the board.
	He's real!
	He's the president of Big Deal Records, LLC. Whenever someone has a company and it's like, hey, my company's Big Deal Records, LLC, it's like, uh, yeah, okay.
	Yeah.
	That's not so great.
	And Music Force Publishing, LLC. With over 40 years in the independent record industry, his management expertise has guided the careers of artists as diverse as Bobby Caldwell.
	And you're like, who?
	Yeah, Laura Branigan, who's dead.
	The Tower of Power, which barely exists anymore.
	Well, the original band definitely doesn't.
	And his marketing expertise has guided many artists to the top of the Billboard charts.
	And then here it is.
	Here's the example which brings in his collaboration with Bobby Caldwell.
	The hit song by Peter Cetera and Amy Grant.
	I mean, it's just not like something...
	The question is, what's this guy got to do with computer security?
	Bullshit.
	He's a connection to Hollywood that this company apparently thinks is great.
	Yeah, this is one of those companies.
	It's not Jimmy Iovine.
	Should we put it that way?
	I mean, if you also look at Tommy Stinson, chief technology officer, attended HIB, the University of Bergen, Norway's He attended studying computers.
	He didn't even get a degree.
	No.
	But now look at the advisors.
	We have Anthony Bargar, industry veteran, thought leader.
	Thought leader.
	I want to be that.
	Hi, my name's Adam Curry.
	I'm a thought leader in podcasting.
	He's a thought leader in cybersecurity.
	Is that a title?
	Can you use that?
	Thought Leader?
	You can put anything you want on your business card.
	I know, but I like it.
	Thought Leader!
	He served in senior positions within the financial services sector, the United States Department of Defense and the intelligence community.
	Okay, then we have down here, we have the venture guy, the money guy is always on the board or an advisor, and some guy from Prudential Insurance, which is probably good to have in there.
	Now, the reason I say this...
	Because this company has been co-founded by some...
	What's his name?
	Norwegian dude.
	Tommy Stiansen.
	He's the co-founder and CTO. And he developed this product, which is called...
	I've got to do it right.
	His product is called Dark Viking.
	Dark Viking.
	So Dark Viking, I'm sorry, Dark Viking is a product that is a black box that sits in the cloud and can see all these attacks.
	And this is what I discovered.
	If you go to this website, people in the chat room listening to the stream right now, norse-corp.com, N-O-R-S-E-corp.com.
	At the top, it says, watch live attacks.
	You must click on this, John.
	You see the little button?
	I missed the first time around.
	Uh-huh.
	Yeah, yeah, I'm clicking on it.
	And it takes you to map.ipviking.com and you can see!
	I bet you this works too.
	I bet you that their companies go, oh my god, look at these attacks.
	They're taking place in real time.
	And it has like a scroll here.
	And you can see it's coming from China.
	This is very good.
	This is fantastic.
	Now this is funny because this is very similar to what I saw maybe five or six years ago at Panda Software in Barcelona.
	It's probably the same thing.
	It may be the same code.
	But look at the right.
	Attack targets.
	Country.
	United States.
	10.
	11.
	113.
	116.
	And 2 to mil dash slash gov.
	And it's HTTP port 80 attacks, John.
	What are we going to do?
	This is...
	Yeah.
	This is the biggest piece.
	This is a gem.
	This is the biggest piece of bullshit I have seen in a long time.
	It's a gem.
	And you can see, notice that all of the flying attack packets are all inbound on the United States.
	There's nothing going out to like Iran or anything else from us.
	It's all inbound to us.
	We are under...
	John, we are under fucking attack, my friend.
	It looks like there is...
	It looks like we're being bombed.
	And you know by who?
	Attack origins.
	It looks like mostly China.
	Well, from the U.S., China, Mexico, but right up there, the Netherlands.
	Hello, Netherlands.
	The Dutch are attacking us, John.
	I'm just seeing an attack right now coming in from Iceland.
	Oh, my goodness.
	Iceland's got a packet coming in.
	It's about to hit.
	I'm going to see where it's going to go.
	Deflect, deflect, deflect.
	Shields!
	Shields!
	Put up shields!
	It's going right to Washington State.
	Oh, here comes one from Latvia, it looks like, or Estonia.
	One loan packet.
	Yeah, one packet.
	Deflect!
	Shields!
	This is...
	That's what you need to say.
	Boinga, boinga, flashing thing that blocks it.
	Yeah.
	We should be able to control this.
	Actually, yeah, this is one of the greatest webpages ever.
	But here's the thing.
	Now, we've been looking at this for how long?
	Two, three minutes?
	About a minute.
	I'm looking at the leaderboard.
	I'm looking at the leaderboard.
	I do not see any North...
	I see South Korea attacking us, but I don't see any North Korea.
	Have we just thwarted them?
	I guess so.
	We put them in their place.
	But the Chinese, these Chiners, man, it looks like they're hammering us.
	Yet it seems like we attack ourselves the most.
	Yes, we apparently are attacking ourselves, according to this list.
	A suicide mission.
	We're number one.
	Well, actually, yeah, 315, the China's 271 right now.
	So when I see this, I, of course, this is bullshit.
	Hey, hey, Juan, stop that.
	This is...
	I mean, sure, packets fly all over the place, but this is not like anyone who looks at this who knows anything and says, yeah, we're under attack.
	You're a moron.
	This is the stupidest thing.
	It's kind of, in a way, a throwback to war games.
	You know what I mean?
	I like it.
	It's beautiful.
	It's a sales tool of all sales tools.
	This is real time.
	This is real!
	This is real!
	This is genius.
	So I'm thinking these guys are in on this game somehow.
	These are not just guys popping up.
	Because they've got DOD, they've got advisors.
	So they are maybe the chosen ones.
	Possible.
	I don't know.
	Are they public?
	No, I don't think they're public.
	Oak Investments is their number one funder and they haven't gone public.
	Is Oak big?
	No, it's not that I know of unless it might be big in the defense department sphere.
	They may be.
	So then there's a second part to this report that I had not heard yet.
	The FBI is warning in a new bulletin that this news organization referred to only as US Per 2 may be getting the Sony treatment from these hackers soon.
	From a bulletin, on 20 December, the GOP, Guardians of Peace, posted pastebin messages that specifically taunted the FBI and this news organization for the quality of their investigations and implied an additional threat.
	no specific consequence was mentioned in the posting.
	We're also getting a better idea today of just how much the massive cyber attack on Sony set that company back in a Wall Street Journal piece.
	Employees had to use a phone tree to spread the word of updates on their network being restored.
	One person would call another.
	That person calls somebody else.
	They've got 6,000 employees, so no small undertaking.
	Gmail accounts and old BlackBerrys that could connect to the network were also utilized, and the payroll department started cutting paper paychecks with an old machine they took out of storage.
	Sony's still recovering, so the FBI obviously taking the threat to this unnamed news organization very seriously.
	By the way, since this is...
	What's this news organization?
	It was unnamed?
	Yes, it's a code name.
	What's the code name?
	U.S. All uppercase.
	U.S. P.E.R. 2.
	So that implies U.S. I would say U.S. Expert.
	Hmm.
	Well, I hope they...
	What I would like...
	First of all, this is, of course, really tech news because it's about a phone tree.
	So it's about phones.
	So we get to talk about a phone tree.
	Skip logic phone tree.
	Hey, get that check printer out of storage like they'd keep it.
	Ugh.
	Does anyone know how to hook up this old check printer to an AS400? Dot matrix.
	Does anybody know how to hook this thing up?
	Does it have a USB port?
	No.
	What was that big plug with the...
	Some IEEE port.
	No, no, no.
	SCSI. SCSI. That's the one.
	SCSI. That thing was bigger than my head.
	Can anyone find a SCSI port on your regular printer here?
	I can't find it.
	SCSI port.
	You know, the ham radio guys still have serial ports.
	Please.
	If they're going to attack a news organization, here would be my dream scenario.
	Wolf Blitzer's head explodes.
	Wouldn't that be perfect?
	Well, I don't know how that would even be possible.
	Well, with the same magic that Kim Jong-un's head exploded in the movie.
	Oh, I see what you're saying.
	By the way, that was the first time I've ever heard Kim Jong-un speak, and he didn't sound like a little feeble boy, as he's always described.
	He sounded like a man saying, hey.
	And if there's anybody who has a full clip of his Christmas speech and can translate it or a translated verse, I'd love to know what he said.
	We have to have some Korean listeners, but it's an old-fashioned form of Korean.
	Right.
	But have we ever seen Kim Jong-un in a full speech that has been translated?
	I can't recall.
	What's the point?
	Why would anyone do that?
	You don't want that.
	We want that.
	We want it, but obviously nobody wants it in the system that intends on selling the South Koreans a bunch of garbage.
	I'm sorry.
	High-tech gear to protect themselves.
	Yeah.
	But you notice at the bottom of this thing, there's like a barcode that scrolls.
	It's kind of cool.
	On to watch live attacks?
	Yeah, down below that.
	It's like a colored barcode.
	There seems to be a lot of activity on port 8000.
	Oh, the colored barcode.
	I'm looking at the attack types.
	This is kind of cool.
	A lot of...
	So they're just using known ports.
	So 80, HTTP. Then they have 8080, which is alternative HTTP. 23, Telnet.
	Really?
	Someone's using Telnet.
	Well, maybe for routers.
	I thought that was all SSH by now.
	Then they have Port 8009.
	What or who uses Port 8009?
	Because that's getting a lot of attacks.
	Dude name, Ben.
	I'm sure there's a dude name.
	We have SSH for 22, which anyone in their right mind doesn't use standard ports for SSH, but okay.
	Oh, VoIP.
	Hmm.
	It's 8009, the forgotten Tomcat port.
	Oh, that's like the oldest exploit in the book.
	Really?
	The fun and forgotten thing is that you can also access that manager interface on port 8009.
	Isn't Tomcat like a web management application?
	I don't know.
	I thought it was.
	I'm not a real port guy.
	8009.
	Let me read about it.
	Here's a whole webpage about it.
	I thought Tomcat was...
	Tomcat using WAR files.
	W-A-R. Exploiting Tomcat.
	It usually involves accessing the Tomcat manager interface on Tomcat HTTP 5.
	It's a Java-based web server.
	That's what it is.
	The fun and forgotten thing is you can also access that manager interface on port 8009 and the port that by default handles the Apache JSERV protocol.
	Yeah, there you go.
	It's a server-side Java web server.
	Yeah.
	So that's their big, whoa, we're going after the Tomcats.
	Yeah, that's going to really do it.
	It'll take them down.
	And what is MSWB, Microsoft, obviously, what is a WBT server on 33...
	What is that?
	3389, I think?
	It's kind of small.
	So there's a Microsoft WBT server.
	These are all known, and another unknown just popped up, 49156.
	This I find interesting, because these seem to be very unsophisticated probed attacks, if this map is anything real.
	Oh, okay.
	3389.
	3389 is RDP, which is Remote Desktop Protocol.
	Okay, that makes sense.
	That's what that's for.
	Okay.
	So try and bring up a remote desktop.
	I guess this kind of brings us into...
	You sent me the link, and of course, there's been a lot of stories, but not a lot of real information.
	But to know that we're at least looking at this and are trying, or on it, is this...
	How do you pronounce it?
	Do you think it's Regin or Regin?
	Is it R-E-G-I-N? Yeah, R-E-G-I-N. I have no idea how to pronounce it.
	I would just call it Regan.
	Well, we need to claim the official pronunciation now.
	Because people will say, oh, the No Agenda Show says...
	I think it's Regin because that's part of the registry and it seems like this does attach itself at some point.
	It attaches itself to Windows Registry.
	Seth Regin.
	Oh, here it is, and it's already Regen.
	Regen.
	Regen.
	The Symantec's got a pronunciation.
	They call it Regen.
	R-E-G-E-N, pronounced R-E-G-E-N. Regen.
	They say Regen?
	Regen.
	Regen.
	Hmm.
	Although the way they have it here could be Regen.
	No, because then it would be GIF. No, I think it would be Gen.
	Regen.
	Regen.
	Oh, wait, here it is, S-N. Let me just open this.
	We've already, the claim has been long.
	This thing's been around for a while.
	It's just nobody knows what it is.
	Yeah.
	Well, what is interesting, and it's just a small part of what I've been reading about it, is that this was, so first of all, it's being said that this is U.S. and Israeli intelligence.
	That seems to be an overarching agreement by the Kasperskis of the world.
	And the second part is that this was really tracked down big time at the Belgicom hack, which wasn't talked about a lot.
	Now, I know Belchacom is how you would really pronounce it.
	Of course, Belgium, Brussels are very important when you're making international calls.
	In fact, I think a lot of calls, cell phone calls internationally, a lot of them already are routed through Belchacom for some reason, I read.
	So it's kind of like a super hub, and they don't want to talk about it anymore because they say, oh, this is old news for us.
	Don't look at us anymore.
	It's all cleaned up.
	But I find the idea of a framework, an entire platform, is this not just the long-heralded legend of the Microsoft Windows backdoor that maybe it wasn't a backdoor, maybe it's just really a framework that they built into this that has always been there?
	I have no idea.
	I mean, I've been reading...
	I read that white paper, and I've looked into this, and it seems to be nobody that's a high-end...
	Security analyst has been able to explain it.
	It looks like a framework with a lot of programmable characteristics, perhaps buttons, checkboxes.
	I don't know how it works.
	Checkboxes?
	Oh no!
	Extremely powerful if you want to go do something specific to something.
	Powerful checkbox.
	Well, you know, you put a check, do you want to do this?
	Yes.
	I mean, that's the way...
	Who else...
	You can't build one of these things for people who have high-end coders.
	You want to build it for some guys in an office that doesn't know much more than checkboxes.
	And so you go through, you have the master code that actually is uncompiled, and then you check a bunch of things, and then you compile it, and off it goes to do whatever it has to do.
	That seems to me to be the way you would structure something like this.
	Right, right, right.
	Yeah, I agree.
	Well, it's...
	I don't know.
	We got our eye on it.
	I don't know.
	No one seems to know how to use it.
	Except apparently the people who broke into Belhakum.
	Yeah, I know.
	It's kind of a universal...
	Ah, there we go.
	Ha ha.
	Nailed you one more time.
	Yeah, no.
	Yeah, no.
	It's one of those things that...
	You know, we can call...
	It's being used, and apparently it also hides well, so it could be your machine, for all we know right now, sending this show to somebody.
	Well, that would be handy.
	Distribute for me.
	This, of course, all falls under the protectorate of the Grand Dukes or Steven Pelsmacher, so I think he should be sending out orders...
	So the minions can figure it out.
	So this is as far as we get with our analysis of region.
	And according to this, it's pronounced region as in regenerate.
	So it's region.
	Yeah, but it's spelled with an I. That's strange.
	How do you pronounce the word gin?
	Well, gin, regen, not regenerate would be regen.
	With a slight difference.
	It should be Regin.
	I would say I'm agreeing with you.
	It should be Regin, not Regin.
	Yeah, Regin.
	Why are these guys claiming it that way?
	I don't like that.
	This is according to Symantec.
	Yeah, I don't like that.
	They may have named it.
	Yeah, I don't like that.
	You know, whoever discovers these things gets to name them.
	Well, I don't like it.
	Okay.
	Symantec said Regen monitors its targets with a rarely seen level of sophistication.
	Internet service providers and telecommunications companies make up the bulk of those that are initially infected, researchers said.
	Region then targets individuals of interest in the hospitality, what?
	The hospitality, energy research, and airline industry, among others, that are served by those same ISPs.
	Region's operators continue to use infected companies as a springboard to gain access to more individuals.
	You know, it sounds like a Trojan of some sort.
	Hmm.
	This is not a good explanation.
	No.
	More than half of observed attacks have targeted Russia and Saudi Arabia, Symantec said.
	Which is why it's supposedly us then, or the Israelis, or something of that ilk.
	Yeah.
	The rest are scattered across Europe, Central America, Africa, and Asia.
	The initial infection came from a variety of sources, such as copies of popular websites or web browsers and USB drives that have been plugged into contaminated systems.
	Hmm.
	Region has five attack stages.
	It begins with an initial drop called the Trojan horse or backdoor breach that allows it to exploit the security vulnerability by avoiding detection.
	Avoiding Texans.
	That too.
	The first stage deploys what is called a loader.
	Okay, this is just meaningless.
	Yeah, this is just stuff.
	Okay.
	Alright, so you know what?
	We have alerted We have alerted our dude's name, Ben, and people will get back to us.
	We've got a lot of really smart people.
	I have Cisco router logins and logs of North Korean traffic, which from some of our dude's name, Ben, kind of shows that, yeah, they had no transit.
	They had no connectivity for a while, at least according to these logs in North Korea.
	They show all the Russian satellite connections and the Chinese.
	We've got some interesting people listening to this program.
	Yes.
	They need something good to listen to.
	Yes, and I wanted to bring this up.
	I got an email.
	It was kind of a nice one.
	In the morning to you.
	This is from Rich.
	He has ForTheLoveOfTech.com podcast.
	I think it is a podcast, too.
	In the morning to you, Adam Tiberius Curry.
	Thank you for your courage.
	The Christmas episode was great!
	Because of the Christmas episode, I bought Confessions of an Economic Hitman on Audible.
	Now, did you use the code TWIT2? Now, I finally know what you guys are talking about when you talk about Economic Hitman.
	Fantastic book.
	And now he's referring to, so what other sacred texts...
	Are there, now that I'm done with this one, he says he also got Brave New World and Babbitt.
	Babbitt's not really a sacred text.
	It's just something we discussed recently.
	Brave New World would be a sacred text.
	And he says, also, is the No Agenda show based on confessions of an economic hitman?
	Well, I think some of our thinking may be based on the general premise of At the end of the book, he starts talking about how we have to ask the important questions and such.
	The whole audiobook seems like no agenda shows zero.
	That's number zero, not hashtag zero.
	Gotcha.
	What do you think has happened to the EU? He says, toward the end, the whole thing relies on the U.S. dollar being the most important currency.
	If another currency came along that was stronger than the dollar, the whole system would fall apart.
	He says that currency is the euro.
	Do you think that's what started all the troubles over there?
	The jackals.
	Well, no.
	But I think we have not officially compiled these, because this is the first time you brought the term up, sacred text.
	Well, I think, what's the No Agenda Bookstore?
	What is the...
	Family of Secrets, Russ Baker.
	Right, that's another one.
	Family of Secrets is great.
	Legacy of Ashes.
	Legacy of Ashes, yep.
	I think Pot Shard should be in there just to keep the...
	Absolutely.
	It totally belongs there.
	Now, there's a book, if you really like reading...
	It couldn't happen here.
	Very good book.
	Life and Death in Shanghai, I would put that in there.
	That's a sacred text, yes.
	Nice book.
	We have...
	The Merck Index.
	Yes.
	Hell yeah!
	My browser just dropped dead.
	I can't look up this book.
	Yeah, it says Neen Cheng is Life and Death in Shanghai.
	Sinclair Lewis, It Can't Happen Here.
	Russ Baker, Family of Secrets.
	Pot Shards by Donald P. Gregg.
	Is there another one that I'm thinking of?
	One Day in Gitmo Nation from Sir Scott McKenzie.
	Maybe do a Thomas Woods nullification?
	That's not really...
	That's more like a...
	I like that book.
	I don't think it's good to understand...
	I don't think it's a sacred text.
	No, no, I don't think so.
	But I think I would look for...
	I'm trying to get the name of his book.
	Carol Quigley wrote a history of the United States that...
	Or actually a history of the world that I think is really good reading.
	Oh, what is this called?
	By the way, I would put on there Neil Postman I'm using ourselves to death.
	I think that would be...
	That qualifies.
	I've never read it.
	Well, then it doesn't qualify.
	If you've never read it...
	And you haven't read this either, which is...
	I've read this book.
	The Quigley book?
	Oh, no, no.
	I'm using ourselves to death.
	No, Quigley book.
	What is the...
	No, I've not read that.
	It's a huge monster.
	Oh, hold on.
	I got another one.
	Garden of Beasts?
	Oh, the one about Nazis.
	Yes.
	That is an outstanding book to read.
	Yeah.
	Is that Garden of the Beast or Garden of Beast?
	I think it's Garden of Beast, isn't it?
	It's Garden of Something that's horrible.
	And it's a real account.
	Of life in Nazi Germany in the 30s.
	Garden of Beast, yes.
	Outstanding book.
	And we came to conclude that it was important to read because...
	I think a couple years ago on the show, we introduced the concept that what would it be like?
	What is the day-to-day life that we're having today?
	Is this anything like Nazi Germany?
	Like Nazi Germany insofar as, oh, yeah, it's just the way it is.
	Don't worry about it.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, we're going to get...
	They hate us.
	It's common sense.
	Common sense.
	That's right.
	I think the book is this one.
	Eric Larson is who wrote Tragedy and Hope, A History of the World in Our Time.
	And it's a 1,348 page, just a dynamite product.
	And the great thing about this is by Carol Quigley.
	I'm buying this right now.
	Somebody turn me on to this.
	Is you can read it like the Bible.
	You do not have to start...
	On page one and start reading.
	I mean, I would read the first couple of chapters or at least the intro in chapter one.
	But you can jump around and it's just filled with cool stuff.
	I am going to give myself a present.
	And I am, this is a very expensive book.
	Now you can rent it from Amazon.
	I didn't know they had, you can rent it.
	Yeah, you want to buy the hardcover.
	Buy the hardcover, 35 bucks.
	Yeah, it's not too bad.
	It's a beauty.
	It is a gem.
	I mean, it's filled with all...
	It talks about the Federal Reserve System and how it works and why it's good and why it's bad.
	Does it have pictures?
	No.
	There's a picture or two in there.
	Of course.
	Otherwise, it'd be terrible.
	1,300 pages with no pictures.
	Uncle Don's book has a lot of pictures.
	Did you know that?
	Yeah, I saw it.
	I have a copy.
	Have you read the book?
	I have perused the book.
	I've not read it.
	Right now I'm in the process of reading Sid Caesar's autobiography.
	Wow.
	Cool.
	You know what's strange when you look at the shipping address for...
	Have you ever shipped to a friend or anything on Amazon?
	Yeah, and it stays on there forever.
	Yeah, and a couple people here that I've sent are dead.
	Oh.
	Yeah, it's a little strange.
	Don't put me on that list.
	You do not want to be on my list, man.
	This is not a good place to be.
	Right.
	Well, that's good.
	Yes, you were going to say?
	I was going to say, if we go back to January 2014, I don't think you need to do the intros anymore.
	This is what the news was about last year at this time, and this I play only because...
	Well, let me play the current clip, which is Bill Kibble.
	Play this clip.
	Bill Kibble just won some award, the alternate Nobel Prize.
	Prize award or something.
	It's some phony award.
	And Bill Kibble is the guy who just retired as the head of 360.org or 340, 345, whatever it is.
	You know, the little organization.
	He's one of the two main guys about global warming.
	Oh, that's 350 or 420.
	I can never remember.
	Dude, it's 420.org, man.
	All right.
	Play?
	Yeah, Bill Kibble.
	As we meet here today, the world is almost done with what will be the hottest calendar year in all the years that we have measured temperatures.
	2014 saw the warmest temperatures by far ever recorded in the Northern Pacific.
	It was also the year when we learned, tragically, that the melt of the West Antarctic ice sheet is now irreversible.
	25 years ago, when I wrote the first book-length account of this crisis, none of these wounds could have been predicted, but that's because scientists are conservative.
	The damage has outpaced their forecasts.
	Every ocean, including the one outside these doors, is now 30% more acidic than a generation ago.
	Yeah, and 5,000 feet higher water level.
	That's terrible what's going on.
	Yeah.
	This time last year, it was the polar vortex.
	Yes, it was.
	We're all freezing to death.
	Everybody was a mess.
	And of course, I had a lot of clips on it, but I only took this one clip because I figured that while you're in the process of slamming the story to everyone that you're going to freeze to death any minute.
	Let's go to Alabama, where it's extremely cold, and let's do what the media loves to do, we point it out every so often, and make the Southerners look like the biggest dummies ever.
	And if I knew what clip I was playing, it would have been...
	Oh, yes, I see it.
	Sorry.
	The cold is expected to reach into the deep south all the way to Jasper, Alabama and Tawana Blaze's house.
	We heat with wood and that's about how we heat with this wood and kindling to keep warm.
	And we put the chicken inside the duck and then we put the duck inside the turkey and we put a big beer can upside his butt and then we eat.
	That's good eating.
	Want some queso?
	Let's make sure we keep these memes intact.
	Everyone in the South's an idiot.
	Yeah.
	And they live on Kindland.
	Kindland.
	And they can barely talk and they're in a shack.
	I got one tooth.
	The B-roll of this was always dynamite because it was literally a shack that was on kind of cinder blocks.
	I'm loving it, man.
	Great.
	Fantastic.
	You know, back in 2014, actually back to 2013, we were doing a lot more of this.
	People say, well, all your show does is ridicule.
	Yes.
	We just ridicule.
	Each other, even.
	Yes.
	We ridicule a lot of things, but it's always changing, so you never know what we're going to do.
	Can I ask you a question?
	Who says that to you?
	Everybody.
	Everybody says all you do is ridicule.
	Well, you get an email.
	How come you're not listening to this show?
	Because all you do is ridicule.
	It's women who say this.
	Women are mad and think all we do is ridicule.
	This is my experience.
	I think you might be right about that.
	And I don't know why.
	Guys say that.
	No.
	Guys are like, hey, that was cool, man.
	You weren't being nice.
	Yeah.
	There you go.
	Women who have children, perhaps.
	Or not.
	Last night, there was an Australian girl who was...
	She was three more months.
	She was about six months pregnant with her second child.
	And she does not want to live here.
	I think...
	I guess they had their first kid...
	In Australia, the deal was with her Texas husband that they would live there, and so they lived there for five years.
	And there was tension between these two.
	At the party?
	Oh, yeah.
	Okay.
	She's Australian, she's Texan?
	No, she's Australian, he's Texan.
	Okay.
	And she's incredibly cute, with a big, big belly.
	Everything you want in a pregnant Aussie.
	Just beautiful.
	Australian women are generally great looking.
	Yeah.
	But has something in there the way she talks that, you know, you just want to, like, hey, don't knife me.
	I don't know, there's something nice about it.
	And the guy is texting, and he's not having this.
	Well, you know, we're here now, and I'm never going back to Australia.
	She's saying, well, I really, you know, my kids, they could be a dual citizen, they can get free health care if anything happens to them.
	So I want to have this kid even in Australia.
	Yeah.
	She wants to do a water birth and whatever.
	But...
	Why did I even bring this up?
	You were talking about...
	And so then...
	And I'm talking to, well, do you like Texas?
	Yeah, you know, but listen, San Antonio, which is not great.
	This is dirty, and I agree.
	San Antonio is, I'm sorry, it's just, if you can be in Austin or San Antonio, you would choose Austin.
	She can't choose for whatever reason.
	He's in real estate.
	And, you know, so I bring up guns, and she, because I said, well, you know, I liked you guys a lot until, you know, you gave up your guns, and she freaked on me.
	I don't understand this gun culture.
	This makes no sense.
	How can you have kids going out with...
	She was basically yelling about her husband.
	They have a five-year-old.
	Boy.
	I don't understand.
	Why do five-year-olds have to go out hunting?
	Why do they have to go and learn how to kill things?
	Can't they wait until they're ten?
	It was so tense, man.
	But I think this kind of ridicule comes from a motherly thing.
	Because really what she's saying makes no sense other than she's projecting her fear that her kid's head is going to get shot off or something while they're out there hunting, which is actually quite unlikely because she's learning gun safety at an early age.
	And her head is gone.
	But I think that's where it comes.
	Women, if it's with children involved and they can...
	You don't want to ridicule.
	You don't want to piss anybody off.
	Don't be a bully.
	Don't say something nasty.
	Don't say cuss words.
	The Democrats have honed in on this particular theory, which you obviously observe in real time, to get them to vote for Democrats.
	The Democrats are the safe party.
	They're against guns.
	They're against these things.
	They're touchy-feely, and they don't say mean things, which is one of the reasons that Democrats on the...
	That's why MSNBC is always going to fail.
	In fact, all these...
	Liberal, progressive.
	You hear that, Al?
	Al?
	You're going to fail.
	They have to fail because they can't be mean, which gets attention, which gets ratings.
	They can't be negative, which gets ratings.
	They can't be for guns.
	It's all touchy-feely.
	They can't ridicule.
	It's all phony is what the problem is.
	They can't ridicule, which gets ratings.
	You can't ridicule.
	Well, we used to ridicule everybody.
	B.S. on television.
	And I have one example here where you'd see this bull crap where somebody says, oh, there's the camera.
	Let's widen the view of the camera.
	Or there's a mile away, there's the guy's license plate.
	Here, push the...
	Oh, like CSI. Yeah, CSI. Rotate, zoom, enhance.
	This was an enhancement.
	Kind of bullcrap thing from the show Bones that I pulled in January of 2013.
	Yes.
	Okay.
	Being overweight could actually help you live longer.
	I'm sorry.
	I'm sorry.
	I clicked the wrong one.
	Let me explain why this is complicated.
	Because you're giving me cues, but typically I can look at your list and I can just say, oh, it's going to be this one.
	But here you've done classics.
	Yeah, you have to go past that part, word classic.
	Yeah, to the end of the sentence.
	Well, that's a very short sentence.
	You study into the effects of obesity.
	Oh, man, I'm hitting the wrong one again.
	Here we go.
	I was able to restore part of the text from the paper scraps that you sent me.
	One contains a fraction, one-third, and the letters A-R-G-A-R. It comes from the word margarine, and the one-third is a one-third of a cup.
	The papers were from a cookbook.
	Eight different pages.
	Is there any way to tell which cookbook?
	Yeah, I ran the typeface through the Library of Congress database, and I got the name and the date of publication and a lot of tips on how to cook for prisoners.
	It's the Gordon Institutional Recipe Index, 1993 edition.
	And Big Hit.
	This show is Big Hit.
	What database in the Library of Congress of fonts?
	What?
	I don't know.
	Is there a Library of Congress database of fonts?
	Have you done any research on the topic?
	Do I have to?
	Well, you're asking the question.
	Maybe you should do some research before you start ridiculing.
	Well, we don't do that much anymore.
	I think it would be with the show Scorpion for a couple of shows, and that was it.
	Because that was just idiotic.
	I haven't.
	I like McPhee.
	I like the whole concept.
	I like the show.
	It's a hit show.
	It's a big hit show.
	What, Scorpion?
	Yeah.
	Bull crap.
	All right.
	But every single time we go through this conversation, we look up the numbers, and they're doing 8 million, 9 million viewers.
	No.
	Yeah.
	I don't know where you're getting this from.
	It's a dog.
	That's okay.
	If you like the show, it's fine.
	I don't know why you'd like the show, but...
	I told you.
	Here, Scorpion.
	10.45 million viewers.
	Let's see the most recent ones.
	They might be in repeats by now.
	But yeah, they're between 8 and 10 million viewers, John.
	This is not a dog.
	This is just not a dog.
	I'm sorry.
	It's not.
	It's a bonanza.
	Well, luckily, we never have to worry about that.
	We don't have to have meetings.
	We don't have to sit down with the advertisers who go, uh, yeah, we think that you probably, um, hi, we're from, um, Ford, and we think you would do much, much better if you cut back on the Tourette's talk.
	Tourette's people are not high in our demos, so we really don't like that.
	I'm going to show my support by donating to no agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh, yeah, that'd be fab.
	Yeah, on no agenda in the morning.
	All right, here we go.
	We do have some people to thank for show 683, including Mark Pugner, who came in with a...
	Good old Mark.
	Pugner, who's in Schaumburg, Illinois, definitely wants to be anonymous because he sends in postal mail orders.
	Wow.
	It's like, you know, what are those things called?
	Yeah, a mail order.
	I mean, a mail-order bride, a money order.
	Not a mail-order bride.
	I didn't get the mail-order bride.
	I rejected her.
	I'm already married.
	135.
	It's a post office thing.
	What do you call it?
	A money order.
	Money grab.
	Western Union.
	Kind of thing.
	13579, which means something to him.
	And by the way, we can't mention the names because under $49 or $150, we don't mention people.
	But when Sir David Foley came in with 2015, I was at the dinner table last night and somebody mentioned, oh, you must have gotten a lot of donations for $20.15 because that's the obvious subtext of the show, right?
	And?
	One.
	Let me guess, was this our marketing department who...
	Ashik El-Musani in Muscat, Oman, 12345, he says, Fi El-Sabah, John and Adam, your combined news...
	I have to read this.
	Your combined news analysis is...
	Wait a minute.
	Your combined news analysis is stupendous.
	Adam's zealousness for sound quality is phenomenal.
	Phenomenal.
	John's grouchiness is stupefying!
	The synchronicity between you two is spectacular.
	You now have a few more words to use instead of...
	And I don't have it.
	That's where it ends for me.
	It ends.
	Okay.
	And by the way, Mark Pugner, 1-3-5-7-9.
	Yes?
	Odd numbers.
	Okay.
	Oh, yeah, so they are.
	Mark's always up to something.
	Giles Pavot.
	Gilles.
	Gilles.
	He's from France.
	He's from Paris.
	Yeah, France.
	His name is Gilles.
	This is stunning to me.
	This is stupefying.
	It's stupefying.
	Here's a donation for both ending well 2014 and my birthday today.
	It's on the list.
	Can I get a job karma?
	We'll put that at the end.
	For several upcoming exams.
	Well, job karmas and exams, I don't know.
	The Christmas deconstruction was great.
	That's the Christmas show.
	Brandon, we should do more things like that.
	Brandon Fenton in Colorado Springs, $120.15.
	We should have done one for today so I could be hanging.
	Well, there's nobody listening.
	With a hangover.
	Yeah.
	Chad Inman in Los Angeles, California, $1.20.
	Sir Bashar Osman in Haro, Middlesex, $111.50.
	Matthew J. Milligan in Boca Raton, Florida, $1.04.
	Sir Bernie Atima in Hinton, Iowa.
	$101.15 says, ah, here they are.
	These are the people that came in with 101.15, which designates the New Year's.
	Sam Manor, 101.15, Box Hill, South Victoria, Australia.
	Sir David Pugh in Massillon, Ohio.
	Massillon.
	Wayne Lacombe, Sandy Bank Hills in Queensland.
	These are all 101.15s.
	Callan Nistor in Northville, Michigan, 101.15.
	And finally, Switcharoo here in Kevin Lacombe in Port Orchard, Washington, 101.10.
	And there's a note that came in.
	I put it on there for a reason because I think there was something interesting in it.
	This was mailed in.
	I mean, it's one thing when I can't figure out your clips, but when you can't figure out your own system, it's a little...
	Whatever.
	Merry Christmas, fellas, in addition to just sending...
	Did you just whatever me?
	No.
	No, I didn't.
	I wanted to pass along a...
	A handout.
	Oh, yeah.
	He sent a poem that apparently was passed around the office that the government paid to have written.
	Oh.
	He works in procurement.
	I'm not going to read the whole poem, but I want to mention I'm going to scan it and put it in the next newsletter.
	Oh, I love that.
	How long is it?
	How long is it?
	Well, let me read a couple of the first verses.
	The holiday season, a time for good cheer.
	This is not a poem, by the way.
	It's a rhyme.
	For eggnog and parties for friends to be near.
	But I must be careful lest I accept free a gift not permitted no matter how we.
	Part 2635 of the 3CFB explains in detail the relevant bar.
	It defines the term gift to mean all things worth money.
	God damn!
	That will assume that that sound is the hook.
	Yeah.
	But this will be in the newsletter.
	And I do want to point out, since I heard you say it, there are two sacred, not sacred texts, but we pronounce measure as measure and poem as poem.
	What did I say?
	No, you said poem.
	It was beautiful.
	I loved it.
	Yeah, I say poem.
	Poem and measure.
	Now, the one thing that people, there's poem, poem, and poim.
	Poim.
	I would qualify poem valid as well.
	I don't like poem.
	And the reason is because it was in high school.
	I never heard the pronunciation, but in high school somebody mentioned that they hated it.
	And I said, you hate what?
	The pronunciation of poem as poem.
	Hmm.
	And I said, I never heard that, and I've never heard it since.
	And of course it's Iran.
	It's Iran and Iraq.
	Afghanistan.
	Well, we do have a pronunciation thing coming up.
	Somebody wants...
	In fact, it was...
	I think it was Ramsey.
	Is Ramsey's thing in here?
	Because there was another...
	Oh, he was doing a pronunciation?
	He wants me to pronounce three words.
	Okay.
	He wants me to pronounce milk.
	Hold on.
	Milk?
	Milk, Illinois, and Pillow.
	Now he puts this in his notes specifically to get me to mispronounce them or to pronounce them Illinois style.
	So it's not Illinois, it's Illinois, Milk, and Pillow.
	And don't forget Washington.
	Well, Washington, I've never heard anyone actually say that.
	You do it all the time!
	Mm-hmm.
	What?
	You always say Washington.
	Weapon Washington.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Well, and there's no 10 million viewers for Scorpion either.
	Can you say MILF? MILF? MILF. That's one of the highlights.
	Alright, onward.
	I think he was trying to make fun of me knowing that I pronounced these in the Chicago style.
	But I know how to pronounce the words correctly, but I can do both.
	So just to make it clear, it is Wisconsinites.
	You know, who do you think it's hilarious?
	Because they pronounce everything like that.
	Crazy talk.
	Yeah.
	Alright.
	Alright, where was I? I don't know.
	Was that the 101 or 102?
	Okay.
	Then we have David Bierce in Altoona, Iowa.
	At 1-0-1-0-1.
	And then we go to Gavin Boud in Sydney, New South Wales, Australia.
	$100.33.
	John Tharp, $99.99.
	Duval, Washington.
	Sir Jason of the Fox Valley, Geneva, Illinois.
	$99.
	Sir Dennis Nutting, $99.
	In Hilo, Hawaii.
	Where there used to be this great airport.
	Elizabeth Borazan in, I think it's Dame?
	I'm not sure.
	Tucson, Arizona, $88.
	I'm way behind on the jingles here.
	Yeah, okay.
	Yeah, 88, 88.
	Yeah, 88.
	Eric Wilka in Rushaville, Indiana.
	Yes.
	Eric is $70.
	Kevin McLaughlin in Locust, North Carolina.
	Also, Harry Reese in Nagoya, Japan.
	And he wants the Chemtrails to play, and I think you might as well play it, because we haven't played that for such a long time.
	Chemtrails.
	He came in with 6969.
	Lucas Zua in Munich, München, Deutschland.
	6789 sent some cuss words to us.
	William Smock, 6234 in San Diego, California.
	James Wolfe, 5927 in Appleton, New York.
	Kevin Dills, Charlotte, North Carolina.
	55, double nickels on the dime.
	Jesse Simonin.
	Parts Unknown, 5510.
	Daniel Rudin.
	Cedar Rapids, Iowa.
	Sorry for not donating in 2014.
	We'll start in 2015 right.
	Birthday shout-out.
	He's a January 1st baby.
	Capricorn!
	So he gets no...
	He gets no gypped.
	Well, unless...
	If you're born in Uganda, I think it's more of a gyp.
	Curtis Barton in, yeah, you're an African.
	Yes.
	5510, Springfield, Utah.
	Andrew Leto in Channel Islands, Jersey.
	Wow.
	Where all the money is.
	Yeah, you know, that's not even part of the UK. No, no, it's his own place.
	But it's his own place, but it's not even part of the globe.
	I know, they've got child abuse and banks.
	It's a protectorate of the Queen.
	Yes, but that's why there's all the child abuse.
	And the orphanage up there.
	It's a crazy place.
	Yeah, it's frightening.
	Well, it's supposed to be rather pretty.
	Because it was a tourist attraction.
	Oh, yeah.
	Jimmy Savile visited all the time.
	There must be some great money laundering out of that place.
	Yes, money laundering and children smuggling.
	Well, it's probably going on.
	Mario Baptista in Johannesburg, South Africa.
	Oh, nice.
	Joe Berg.
	Joe Berg.
	We put some karma at the end for him.
	Leaving the slave workplace to pursue my dream job.
	He's going to be knight of the nation of Africa.
	Cool.
	Polis Solutions, LLC in Denver, Colorado, 5280.
	Christopher Dolan in Berlin, Connecticut, 5102.
	Sir Kevin Payne in Richmond, Virginia.
	Gorgeous little town, by the way, $50.69.
	Sir Inside Jobs in Seattle, Washington, 5033.
	Roger E. Estee in Palm Harbor, Florida, 5015, which is a happy New Year thing. - William LaRock, 50-15, in Locust, North Carolina.
	He says he donated $222.22 for a job.
	Karma wanted to say it worked.
	I began my new job on January 5th.
	Let the people know that karma works.
	Karma works, people.
	It's real!
	It's real!
	These people are...
	You're really getting into that.
	Ever since you said I was starting to sound good, now I'm not.
	You are, you are.
	But you've got to have more than just it's real.
	You've got to understand this is real!
	Karma works!
	There.
	It's getting there.
	I'm getting there.
	Okay, these are all $50 donors.
	I'm going to wrap it up with Anonymous in Milton, Ontario, Canada.
	$50.
	Shane Rozdilski in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada.
	Maxwell Frey, Brooklyn, New York.
	Michael Salwagna in Stauffville, Ontario.
	Adam Pribola in Plymouth, Michigan.
	Dustin Martin in Salem, Oregon.
	Kirk Daniels in Hendersonville, North Carolina.
	Sir Scott Fuller in Cumming, Georgia.
	Anonymous lesbian.
	Hey, there she is.
	Somewhere cold, $50.
	Sir Bogdan Lechendro.
	Now, he said it's a real pronunciation.
	Lechendro.
	Lechendro.
	In Roanoke, Texas.
	And finally, Matthew Stevens in North Highland, Texas.
	$50.
	I want to thank all these folks, of course, for really starting off the new year right for show 683, and we hope that it continues throughout 2015.
	And the appreciation that we have for how this has worked now in our eighth year, right?
	Eighth year.
	In our eighth year, we want to also, to the job karma thing at the end, also add a couple dedouches which were requested by people, such as Michael Selvagna.
	Okay.
	I'm happy.
	I'm just happy.
	I'm happy that we're still alive, we're still eating, and we're still doing the show.
	Right, and we're still deconstructing and discovering new things.
	Every single day there's new stuff.
	And by the way, stunning.
	Just stunning, just stunning.
	When you see that cyber attack map?
	No, that's worth the price of admission right there.
	It's just stunning to me that this is taking place.
	And we should not ridicule, women tell us.
	That needs to be ridiculed.
	Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure that we're not going to change our personalities.
	Well, no, that may not happen.
	Thank you very much.
	We, of course, do have a show coming up on Sunday.
	This is the first day of the new year, January 1st, 2015.
	And we're doing the show, and we look forward to the next show, the second one.
	And we are working on the first.
	We are working.
	We started the year off right away working, feet hitting the ground running.
	That's right.
	You know what?
	It keeps you going.
	This is important.
	You can't just be goofing off.
	No, no goofing off allowed.
	Dvorak.org slash N-A You've been de-douched.
	Ow!
	ISIS. We will follow them to the gates of hell.
	ISIS. I feel good!
	Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
	Let's vote for jobs!
	You've got karma.
	It's your birthday, birthday.
	I'm so much.
	And we start off with Serendipity, who says happy birthday to his brand new human resource, Emma, who was born on the 28th of December 2014.
	That's last year's news.
	Welcome, Emma.
	Gilles Pabot.
	Bonne chance.
	Bonne arrivée, sir.
	Gilles, je m'en fous.
	Happy birthday.
	Along with Danielle Rudin, turning 34 years old today.
	Happy birthday from all of your friends here at the magnificent Good Ship No Agenda.
	It's your birthday, yeah.
	Now we have...
	Where did I write it down?
	We were changing...
	For some reason, of course, it didn't take.
	Dame...
	Let me go back up.
	Dammit Janet!
	Yes.
	Dame Melody Mann, a.k.a.
	Dammit Janet.
	Where did it go?
	Because she wanted to be something else.
	She wanted to be...
	Transylvania was involved.
	Yes.
	And the Louisiana Purchase.
	Transylvania and the Louisiana Purchase.
	Let me read it to you.
	She wants to henceforth be styled Dammit Janet of Transylvania and the Louisiana Purchase.
	She's a baronet.
	Got it.
	Got it.
	I don't know if she's ever been knighted.
	Oh, Dame Melody Man has been damed.
	Oh, okay.
	I thought so, too.
	I remember a good daming.
	I wouldn't forget a good daming ever.
	Okay, so we would like to first grab our blades here.
	John, grab yours.
	Thank you very much.
	And I'd ask...
	Asscrack, step forward!
	Stephen Fettig, Ramsey Cain, Christopher Dolan, and Craig Mazzella.
	Step forward!
	All of you becoming Knights of the Note in the round table today, I hereby pronounce the Sir Asscrack, Sir Pants, Sir Ramsey Cain, Sir Christopher Dolan of Pancakes, and Sir Matt Hatter, Knight of the Fifth Column.
	Gentlemen, for you, we have...
	Sake and sushi, root beer and pepperoni pizza, hookers and blow, red boys and chardonnay, ass cream and bear fillings, cabinets and cabernet, geishas and sake.
	Bong hits and bourbon, of course.
	Mutton and mead.
	Wow, what a big list.
	Nice.
	Feels good.
	My arms are tired from all that.
	Oh, nice.
	We got some ASCII art.
	In the chat room.
	That's the stuff.
	Yeah.
	It's kind of hot.
	Oh, but Doug kicked him out.
	Oh, well.
	Doug is a flood.
	You can't flood.
	If you flood, then Doug will kick your ass.
	Floods are duds.
	Yeah, floods are duds.
	Since you kept wanting to play the...
	Yeah, I might as well play it now, right?
	Since we've been talking about it and I keep playing it.
	Yeah, play it.
	Being overweight could actually help you live longer.
	That's at least according to a controversial new study into the effects of obesity.
	Researchers in the United States say carrying a few extra pounds might actually reduce your risk of an early death.
	Sky's health correspondent Thomas Moore explains.
	Uh-uh.
	A new year and a new determination to get fit and lose weight.
	But those extra pounds from Christmas indulgence could in fact be a lifesaver.
	Uh-uh.
	New research shows people who are a little overweight are less likely to die prematurely than those who stay slim, contradicting the long-standing advice of most doctors.
	It's good to have a little bit of body fat.
	I don't think you should be trying to stay at a very low weight.
	But it's like everything else is in moderation.
	That has to be utter **** to use my French.
	Where do I get this stuff from?
	You don't believe it at all?
	No.
	This was two years ago.
	Yeah.
	To the day, almost.
	Uh-huh.
	And we haven't heard anything of this since, because this is no good.
	It's not true.
	This is like the South Koreans selling them weapons.
	We need to keep these diet pills and drugs and gyms and spinning classes and all these.
	Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
	All you need to say in business, so let's not even talk about anything like this.
	It's crazy.
	Did you see Taylor Swift's gift-giving of 2014 video?
	What a promotional genius this woman is.
	I mean, I had tears in my eyes.
	I did not see it because I refused to watch any more Taylor Swift stuff.
	She was in the news everywhere.
	I don't know who her publicist is, but I'm sure they work together because this is not something that any one person can accomplish.
	Well, I think FedEx was also involved.
	A lot of signage for FedEx everywhere.
	Yeah.
	But, wow, I just love this girl now.
	As much as I ridiculed her in the beginning.
	And you should continue to ridicule her.
	How about a banger?
	Sorry.
	Little girls' hearts around the country just went crack.
	Is it well worth it?
	I put it under the real news category.
	Any little girl who's a big Taylor Swift fan, I can assure you, does not listen to this show.
	Right.
	Well, so if you watch this video, you'll see all these girls, Taylor sent them Christmas gifts, and some even a Hanukkah gift.
	And they're all wearing their brand new, it's so obvious, their brand new Taylor Swift t-shirts while they're opening their gifts.
	Huh!
	Wow!
	What a coincidence!
	Who would have thought?
	Yeah.
	But it's so cute.
	But then Taylor's in her Manhattan pad, packing all these gifts up.
	Well, she's packing up some.
	Yeah, she's packing up one.
	No, a couple.
	And she writes little handwritten notes.
	And she's just as cute as a button, I gotta say.
	I've been infiltrated.
	Yeah, you've been corrupted.
	I've been violated and corrupted.
	I've been violated and corrupted.
	Taylor Swift has finally gotten to me.
	I can't help it.
	Now I'm all Team Taylor.
	It was worth it.
	Team Taylor.
	Team Taylor.
	Yeah.
	Hey, let's do a couple other things before we get out of here.
	First, oh yeah, so both girls are gone at the State Department.
	They're off on vacation.
	They need to have a New Year's party.
	But who is there?
	Who is in the trenches in pole position?
	Carrie.
	Our man, Matt.
	Oh, Matt.
	Oh, Matt's still there.
	Yeah, of course.
	Oh, yeah.
	Works.
	That's what he's got to do.
	And so there's this douche who's filling in.
	He's actually the press office director.
	I don't know.
	Is he above?
	Is he Jen?
	From the sounds of it, yes.
	He would be their boss.
	What a moron.
	Okay, so it starts off like this.
	You may have missed this little ditty that occurred in Ottomania, also known as Turkey.
	You may have missed this little ditty where a senior Hamas representative was hanging out in this NATO ally country known as Turkey.
	They are an official terrorist organization, according to our State Department.
	So if you're the director of press for the State Department, you might expect a question about this.
	Oh, wow.
	I don't know what happened there.
	Hold on a second.
	They blew up the State Department.
	Do you have anything to say about the Prime Minister of Turkey meeting and spending significant time with the senior leader of Hamas?
	I don't think I have any comment to offer on that.
	I'm happy to see if we have more of a readout, but nothing to add right at this point.
	You think someone would have a tab for that, don't you?
	Yeah.
	Then, of course, Matt isn't having none of this.
	Matt Lee, our diplomatic reporter, hero of the C-SPAN, He is a star.
	He should get his own Walk of Fame star.
	Can you push really hard to get an answer on this?
	Because it seems kind of unusual that the Prime Minister of a NATO ally of yours is meeting with the head or the political chief of an organization that you designate as a terrorist group, and you guys don't have anything to say.
	No, we'll come back with something this afternoon for you.
	We'll come back with something this afternoon.
	Well...
	So this afternoon they came back, and let's continue with our little saga here with the boss man douche dickhead and Matt Lee.
	We continue to raise our concerns about the relationship between Hamas and Turkey with senior Turkish officials, including after learning of Khalid Mishal's recent visit there.
	Now how would you retort to what he just said if you were Matt Lee?
	Oh, I might ask him that this doesn't mean anything, or what do you mean, or further explain.
	I just say that.
	That's what I would say.
	Well, I mean, is that the extent of it?
	You just say, we're concerned?
	I mean, this is a NATO ally hosting an avowed enemy of one of your biggest allies.
	Well, we have urged the government of Turkey to press Hamas to reduce tensions and prevent violence.
	Hold on, there's almost a second.
	Hey, I gotta urge, man.
	Don't do that no more, okay?
	Stop it.
	We raise this at senior levels with our Turkish counterparts.
	Do you think that an invitation to him and the Prime Minister of Turkey receiving him and welcoming him is an indication that your concerns are being addressed?
	Do you love this guy or what?
	Yeah, that's what everyone's supposed to be doing.
	Well, he's the only one doing it.
	Well, I think you can draw your own conclusions from that, but certainly we take Hamas as a terrorist organization very seriously.
	That's why they're a designated FTO. Foreign terrorist organization.
	FTO. Well, here's what Matt needs to be careful of.
	Getting killed like Helen.
	We're getting killed like Helen.
	He's being set up.
	Yes, yes, yes.
	And then you die.
	Well, she died of old age, but...
	But she was...
	It was very sad.
	It was sad.
	She got fired.
	Yeah.
	I was going over the list of major stories of the whole last year, and the ones that have been forgotten, and there's a whole slew of them.
	Of course, it compares a lot differently to what you have on Yahoo's top stories, which seems to be all celebrity news.
	Well, they know they're doing it right.
	If you want ratings...
	Well, they make more money than we do.
	But, you know, besides Snowden, North Korea, the GM Ignition Switch, the polar vortex.
	Michael Brown, I Can't Breathe, Ray Rice.
	But the one that seems to be kind of forgotten is the...
	Oh, and we forgot about the Olympics.
	Nobody even talks about that anymore.
	And the ice bucket challenge, that was pretty stupid.
	Okay, it's Bergdorf.
	And in exchange for the guy who now runs, we, by our theory, assume that this one superstar drug guy that was in Gitmo was released to take over the drug business.
	Mm-hmm.
	So I found that this clip was kind of interesting because it was kind of slipped in in a Democracy Now!
	report.
	And this is the targeting drug dealers in Afghanistan clip, which says to me, you know, things are back to kind of, without our people there, I think things are going to be fine.
	A new report has revealed a kill list used by the U.S.-led NATO coalition in Afghanistan targeted not only high-level commanders of the Taliban, but mid- and lower-level operatives and even drug dealers.
	The secret documents, at least some of which came from NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden, span from 2009 to 2011.
	According to the German news magazine Der Spiegel, which reviewed them, they showed targeted killings were, quote, not just viewed as a last resort to prevent attacks, but were in fact part of everyday life in the guerrilla war in Afghanistan.
	In one case, a young boy was killed and his father injured by a British helicopter pilot who was targeting a suspected mid-level Taliban commander.
	So all along we've been, you know, part of the game is to target the Taliban guys.
	There's one of these renegade drug dealers doing business on the side, which we've got nothing to do with.
	And American Hero is another sacred text as in a movie?
	That people should watch?
	Was it American Hero?
	I don't know what American Hero is.
	American...
	No, American Drug Kingpin?
	Come on.
	Denzel Washington.
	Yeah, it was a movie.
	Yeah, American...
	Gangster.
	Gangster, thank you.
	American Gangster.
	True story.
	And it's a true story.
	Yeah, it's a true story, and everyone should watch that.
	If you're going to watch documentaries, I was watching the last night, I was chewing up some time, in God We Trust, which is a documentary about Bernie Madoff.
	Oh, yeah, also...
	And when you watch this, I'll have some clips of it.
	Is this on Netflix?
	Yeah, it's on Netflix, I think.
	It's called In God We Trust.
	Very interesting.
	It turns out that the Madoff Ponzi scheme was actually a front for a money laundering operation.
	There's gambling going on?
	And so, it's fascinating.
	And if anyone gets a shot at that, I would check it out.
	I don't really have anything, a clip from it.
	I thought I did.
	I do have this clip, though.
	This is interesting.
	This came out of a bunch of NSA stuff.
	Now, this could be a red herring and bull crap, just to make you think that this doesn't work.
	But I thought the encryption works clip is worthless.
	And where is this from?
	Democracy Now!
	again?
	This came from Democracy Now!
	Meanwhile, another round of documents from Snowden, published by Der Spiegel, shows some encryption tactics have successfully thwarted spying by the National Security Agency.
	An NSA document describes, quote, catastrophic levels of difficulty.
	difficulty penetrating the communications of users who employed a combination of different encryption technologies.
	Well, what is your feeling?
	What is your feeling on this?
	Well, I know TrueCrypt, which was then taken off the market, used to promote the idea of multiple encryptions, one on top of the other.
	So you take this type and then you combine it with this type and you combine it with a third type.
	It's possible that that creates a problem in terms of decrypting, you know, by hard, you know, taking the biggest machines you can and going after your password.
	I don't know.
	I think it could be bull crap that they've finally figured out how to do that, or it might actually work.
	I just think a combination of high crypt numbers, you know, 256 of this, and then plus this other crazy thing in another one.
	It can't be that easy to decrypt.
	Well, I think here's the only thing really that is important.
	Look at what happened with Sony, and, you know, the smallest things...
	And I have lots of stuff in my email that could be very, very embarrassing to you, John, if that ever came out.
	So, you know, it should be just good practice that you just learn to encrypt and decrypt the stuff that you're sending.
	No one wants to help people do this.
	Just no one wants to help.
	Although I'll say Apple...
	You get a knock on the door if you...
	I mean, that guy who did PGP was harassed for years.
	This is Zimmerman.
	Zimmerman, yeah.
	Well, I think, didn't he eventually just buckle?
	Maybe.
	Yeah, that's the word.
	I never realized that they're panned left and right.
	Oh, they're knocking?
	Yeah.
	Mine is left and yours is right.
	That's kind of cool.
	That's funny.
	That's good.
	Well...
	I don't know.
	I'll say Apple's mail application in conjunction with GPG tools is pretty stunning because when someone sends you an email, it automatically, and I have yet to see it fail, will parse out, find this person's public key.
	And when you reply, it just works.
	You don't have to go rooting around, searching key servers.
	It does it.
	And it adds it to your GPG keys.
	And I find that is the closest I've seen to being any good.
	By the way, the Spiegel, which Democracy Now is quoted now twice in two of these clips, the Spiegel, the Spiegel, as Amy says, the crack reporting team, as witnessed by the tweets from I.O.Error, that's Jacob Applebaum, our new story on mass surveillance and the kill list in the Spiegel, me and Laura reporting.
	Poitras.
	What are they reporting?
	They just have this Snowden document that they're parroting.
	Yeah, but they're now reporters.
	They're Spiegel, the new team, new reporting.
	It's a little icky.
	You know, Applebaum is a promoter.
	I don't think he's really a journalist who should be receiving...
	Let me see if they get a byline on it.
	Or they get awards.
	Oh, yeah, they get all kinds of awards.
	Let me see if they get the...
	Oh, okay.
	That's funny.
	So he has to hype himself because it says...
	Obama's List, A Dubious History of Targeted Killings in Afghanistan by Spiegel Staff.
	That's us, man.
	That's really me and Laura Poitras.
	That's lame.
	That's very lame.
	It's not lame.
	It's just super lame.
	Yes, super lame.
	They didn't give us a byline.
	We didn't get a byline, man.
	That really sucks, man.
	Let me see this other one.
	And here he says, secret...
	Hold on.
	This is quite funny, actually.
	Connecting hashtag NSA mass surveillance.
	I'm sorry.
	Following up to their at Der Spiegel reporting, at Laura Poitras, and at IO error, talk at, oh, 3-1-C-3.
	Did you see this thing?
	Did you hear about this?
	It's 3-C-TV? No.
	Ah.
	Yeah, crap.
	I gotta look at this.
	This I missed, and I feel bad about it.
	There was another one of these conferences from the Chaos Computer Club in Berlin.
	And, you know, Assange's girlfriend did another speech.
	So, you know, we have to ridicule.
	I just haven't had time to look at it.
	Okay, we'll put it on the next show.
	It's on the agenda for Sunday.
	No agenda on Sunday.
	Yes, and I will ridicule.
	Okay, good.
	Yeah.
	Poitras and...
	Wait for you to get into it.
	Yeah, I'm never getting laid ever again in my life.
	Okay.
	That's good.
	Yeah.
	Nice.
	Fine.
	Let me give it more tense.
	I'm done.
	Okay, well, good luck to Taylor Swift.
	Oh, I would like to point out that Russia...
	I have to say the South Stream is not dead as far as I'm concerned.
	There's all kinds of reports.
	Russia's Gazprom now bought 50% stake in...
	I got this from Europe, obviously.
	The South Stream Transport BV, which is a Dutch corporation.
	BVs are Dutch corporations.
	So now it is 100% owner of the South Stream Transport BV. These are the guys who are doing some of the pipelines and the transport of South Stream.
	I wonder if it's a buyout or if it's just an opportunity.
	I'm keeping my eye on it.
	Anything could go.
	Turkey is up in the air right now.
	Turkey's doing strange stuff.
	Then we have Academy confirms that they will be training the Ukrainian military for street fighting.
	Geez, what do they expect to be going on?
	I guess you're going to move into that area where the Russians...
	Well, we know they've been there.
	We have all the videos of people literally pointing at them and going, Blackwater!
	Blackwater!
	Okay.
	Academy!
	Yeah, we got nothing to do with it, though.
	No, no, no, no.
	It's all Putin.
	And here it is, the meme of the day.
	Put it in the book.
	We've had revisionist Russia.
	And now, you probably heard...
	Where he had this possible political foe, Alexei Navalny, arrested.
	But his brother is arrested.
	I think he has house arrest.
	Are you ready for the meme?
	Do you have the book?
	I got the pen.
	Putin Goes Medieval.
	They come up with something better than that.
	It's popping up everywhere.
	What is he doing that makes him go medieval?
	Is he eating turducken?
	There you go.
	No, man.
	This is about throwing your political opponents in jail.
	That's medieval.
	And it sounds cool.
	This is coming from somewhere.
	Hold on.
	Let's do a search.
	Putin medieval.
	How do we spell medieval?
	What's the question?
	Yeah.
	The central question.
	M-E-D-I-E-V-E-A-L. M-E-D-I-E-V-A-L. Medieval.
	Medieval.
	Alright.
	Putin now taking his rival family members hostage like a medieval king.
	There's the first story.
	Putin goes medieval on the Russian opposition.
	Putin getting medieval.
	Nice.
	Putin goes medieval on Russian opposition.
	Who else do we have?
	What's interesting is, too, it goes both...
	Putin is getting medieval, Putin goes medieval, Putin goes medieval, Putin goes medieval.
	This is all the...
	This is coming out of everywhere.
	Yeah.
	This is a meme.
	What's the source?
	That's the hard part.
	I don't know.
	Well, it goes medieval.
	The biggest...
	Could be.
	The getting comes from Newzer.
	And Putin goes, maybe, well, it comes from Bloomberg.
	We'll find a sentence in here, and maybe we can figure this out.
	But it's obviously going around.
	You do that, and I'll watch the Computer Chaos Club to ridicule.
	All right, we're in business.
	Does that sound like a deal?
	2015 looks like a winner.
	Yeah.
	Starting off with a b-b-b-bang, everybody.
	Very nice.
	With a bang.
	Hey, John, I have to say, the year starts off good when the first person I physically speak to is you.
	It's good.
	It's not bad.
	It's not bad.
	I'm happy.
	I'm happy.
	Well, I'm happy, too, that we get another year underway here with some good stuff coming up.
	I think it's going to be loaded.
	I think so, too.
	It's great.
	We live in great times, my friend.
	Last night, there was a New Year's celebration when everyone had some champagne and a toast to the surveillance state.
	It keeps no agenda in business.
	Oh, well.
	I, too, toast the police state of the United States of Gitmo Nation.
	Proud of it.
	And I'm here in FEMA Region 6.
	My name is Adam Curry.
	In the morning, everybody.
	Yes?
	I thought you had something else to say.
	Yeah, I said, be in the morning, everybody.
	I'm Adam Curry.
	Oh, okay.
	Well, then, from northern Silicon Valley, where it is also part of the giant police state, which works like a champ, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We'll be back on Sunday, right here, on No Agenda.
	The fact that it works, just first and foremost, is such an amazing feeling, and the fact that it gets acknowledged in any way is pretty amazing.
	But the Golden Globe is even cooler, because my sister got nominated, too, so that's pretty amazing.
	Oh, my God!
	It was worth it.
	it was worse boom chakalaka boom chakalaka bingo boom boom chakalaka boom boom chakalaka boom boom there's no real conflict Adios, mofo.
	The best podcast in the universe!

▲