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June 9, 2013 - No Agenda

02:42:58

520: Kale Donuts

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Time	Text
	The name of the talk show is Legally Drunk.
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Sunday, June 9th, 2013.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation media assassination episode 520.
	This is No Agenda.
	Celebrating the miracle of swazzle enough this morning here in the Travis Heights hideout in Austin, Texas.
	Capital of the Drone Star State in the morning, everybody.
	I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, where it's cold and miserable, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We had a huge rainstorm this morning here.
	I mean, like, just all of a sudden.
	And don't you hate it when...
	Yeah, there you go.
	Don't you hate it when you spend an hour the day before doing things like, I don't know, washing the car.
	That's the jinx.
	Watering the lawn.
	You can't wash your car.
	And it's not even my car.
	It's Miss Mickey's car.
	She's coming back.
	Oh, so you're making the car.
	Oh, yeah.
	Not just the car.
	I've got flowers in the house.
	I'm totally...
	So she's finally coming, you think, tonight?
	Yes.
	She'll be there tomorrow, probably.
	What's the next flight?
	She's going to go through Atlanta.
	Well, if she gets stuck in Atlanta, that's good news, because we have about ten producers in Atlanta who will pick her up.
	I love the party with her.
	Yeah, thanks.
	Well, you're snappy today.
	Oh, hold on, John.
	Before we do anything, we need to play our new theme song from They Might Be Giants.
	You've heard of these guys, right?
	Yeah, of course.
	Call connected to the NSA.
	Complete transmission to the NSA.
	Suspending your rights for the duration of the permanent war.
	I think these guys are so awesome. .
	They get it.
	It may be giants.
	Yes, it's true.
	They really get it.
	And they had this out, I can't remember.
	This has been a while.
	Yeah, well, this is not news.
	We're going to talk about this, I guess, right off the bat.
	No, no, no, no.
	We might as well.
	You got this song.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	We have to ease into it because I'm going to satisfy everyone with the value I'm going to provide today.
	Because I have a theory on it all.
	Yeah, well, why don't we ease into it, though, with a little bit of fun at our president's expense.
	Oh, well, I'm always game for that.
	So the president had a little press thingy.
	It wasn't really intended to be much of a press thingy specifically about the PRISM and all of this spying that people are talking about.
	It was about Obamacare.
	And if you were ever invited to stand behind the president...
	You've really got to think about if you want to do this.
	Did you see this particular press conference?
	Not with a guy standing back there mugging.
	No, there were four people.
	Fell asleep.
	Well, if you watch them, you see after about five minutes, they zombify.
	You get these starry eyes, and one guy's head is cocked to the right the whole time.
	I don't know why they...
	This is a bad idea.
	You should always say, Ed, that's all right, man.
	I don't need to be on the stage with the president.
	That's okay.
	I'll just sit here in the audience.
	So what happened, right off the bat, it was exhilarating and wonderful to watch because the stage manager forgot to hand the president, not just hand the president his script, but to put it onto the podium.
	Oh, and the President was not happy with this.
	I mean, I would say he came close to throwing a Celebrity tantrum.
	And here's what happened.
	Good morning, everybody.
	It is wonderful to see all of you, and I want to thank everybody who's here.
	I think there's only one problem, and that is that my remarks are not sitting here.
	People!
	People!
	This is the sign of a man who is very, very frustrated and there's stuff bubbling under when you talk like this to your staff.
	And you call them people.
	And you say, people!
	People!
	Hello now, people!
	And Ed McMahon apparently isn't in the audience, yucking it up for him.
	You know, things, by Friday afternoon, things get a little...
	A little challenged.
	I'm going to answer a question.
	So it's interesting that he knows already he's going to answer a question.
	At the end of the remarks, but I want to make sure that we get the remarks up.
	People?
	People?
	What does that mean to you, John, when someone does that to the staff?
	Well, I think it could be taken as a light-hearted kind of a thing.
	No, no.
	Did you see it?
	You get big laughs.
	No, not the second time.
	And his face was mad.
	He was mad.
	But really, the whole thing, he can't even start.
	He can't just start to ad-lib a little bit.
	Just a teeny weeny bit.
	Or, say, hey, hold on a second.
	I'll be right back.
	Just get off the stage.
	Dude, where's my script?
	Or where are my remarks?
	This is what it's called now.
	Remarks.
	Remarks.
	Yes.
	I have some remarks for this movie I'm doing.
	Oh, goodness.
	Oh, goodness.
	Oh, somebody's tripping.
	I mean...
	Don't fire him.
	Folks are sweating back.
	Did you hear someone say, don't fire him?
	Did you hear that?
	It was a very interesting moment I felt, this.
	Folks are sweating, those people.
	Well, good morning, everybody.
	Good morning.
	So we fast forward through all of the stuff, and then there's the shill.
	We know that there's always a shill who's going to ask a question here or there, but there was only one question and one shill.
	Thank you very much.
	I'm going to take one question, and then remember, people are going to have opportunities to also answer questions when I'm with the Chinese president today, so I don't want the whole day to just be a bleeding press conference, but I'm going to...
	Bleeding press conference?
	Is he now British all of a sudden?
	And instead of saying fucking press conference, it's a bleeding?
	Or is there actual blood involved?
	Or what does this mean?
	That's odd.
	Right?
	Yeah, yeah.
	Take a...
	He could have said, you know, start using scheisskopf.
	Some other terms.
	Scheisskopf?
	This is not an outstanding word.
	No, I'm just saying, he's like, if he's going to start swearing in kind of offhanded, foreign ways...
	He should definitely, he should mix it up a bit, is what you're saying.
	Yeah.
	Scheisskopf.
	Merda!
	Merda!
	So this doesn't turn into a merde.
	Jackie Combs question.
	Now, Jackie Combs, interesting.
	So he calls on one reporter, one reporter only, and she is a reporter, and he pronounces it Combs.
	And it took me a while to find out who he's talking about, so the New York Times got the one.
	Gee, how does that work?
	Of all the people in the room, the New York Times gets to ask the question.
	And listen specifically to how she phrases her question.
	For the newspaper of record, I would have to say, quite shameful.
	Mr.
	President, could you please react to the reports of secret government surveillance of phones and internet?
	Can you also assure Americans that your government doesn't have some massive secret database of all their personal online information and activities?
	Is she reporting for a high school newspaper?
	Wow, that's bad.
	Can you also assure the American people that you don't?
	I mean, is this leading the witness?
	How does that qualify as an actual question?
	Can you assure the American people that you don't have some massive database that you're spying on?
	All you have to do is say no.
	That was, whoa, New York Times, huh?
	Okay, now let's go into, I have to say, it always happens with this guy, but here we go.
	People, pay attention.
	When I came into this office, I made two commitments that are more important than any commitment I make.
	Okay.
	Do we need to play his oath again, John?
	Is it that time where we...
	I think so, yes.
	Okay.
	I actually forgot to put that in my...
	Hold on.
	I'll have it in two seconds.
	Damn.
	So the two things that he promised, you would expect it would be Equal to the oath that he took when he was sworn in on his inauguration day.
	And...
	Right, so that's not going to happen.
	I don't have it for you now.
	Number one, to keep the American people safe.
	What?
	That's the number one thing?
	That's not what it says.
	I, Barack Hussein Obama, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States and will, to the best of my ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States.
	So help you God.
	So help me God.
	Congratulations, Mr.
	President.
	Okay, so hold on.
	Two commitments that are more important than any commitment I make.
	Number one, to keep the American people safe.
	And number two, to uphold the Constitution.
	Guess a couple things there.
	What happened to protect and defend?
	Does he think he just has to hold it up in the air?
	Every night I uphold that thing like this.
	Just put it up there in the air.
	No, Mr.
	President.
	Nowhere in the Constitution.
	Or, in Article 2, does it state that you have to defend and protect the American people?
	You can appoint.
	You can do meetings.
	You are the commander-in-chief, which means you get to do meetings.
	Unless you want to get on a horse and go out there and be in front with a saber, then I'll give you a little slack.
	I'll cut you some slack on that.
	But no.
	No.
	That is not your job.
	The American people defend the American people.
	Am I correct, John?
	You are the constitutional lawyer.
	Absolutely.
	And that includes...
	What I consider to be a constitutional right to privacy.
	No, you see, it's not really a constitutional right to privacy.
	You already have the right to privacy.
	The government is not allowed to encroach that right.
	I find it very, very disturbing that the constitutional law professor, President Obama, continuously propagates this meme.
	This is disturbing.
	It's an observance of civil liberties.
	Now, the programs that...
	All right, so...
	So he's full of just nothing but slippery stuff in this...
	To me, this was just comedy gold, this whole speech.
	It was 15 minutes, and I just broke it down in little 30-second bits.
	So this is about the...
	We're getting into prism, John, and I do want to hear what you're thinking about.
	So the words matter with this guy.
	We know this.
	So let's listen to his exact words.
	When it comes to telephone calls...
	Nobody is listening to your telephone calls.
	I think he's telling the truth here.
	However, what he's saying is no one's listening to him.
	He didn't say they're not being recorded to get listened to later.
	Yeah, no, that's what's going on.
	Exactly.
	This whole thing has been an exercise in obfuscation.
	Oh, there's no direct connection.
	There's all these key buzzwords that have been used to defend them.
	This is out of control.
	Well, it gets a little better when, and I thought this, to me, where he uses the very same reporter, Jackie Combs, as an example, and I felt if he were talking to me this way, I'd be like, are you threatening me?
	Anybody in government wanted to go further than just that top-line data and wanted to, for example, listen to Jackie Colm's phone call.
	That could happen, Jackie.
	They'd have to go back to...
	You might be nodded to Jude, Jackie.
	A federal judge.
	I don't think I like the way you asked that question, Jackie.
	I don't know.
	So here it is.
	We all know what...
	I think it was Benjamin Franklin.
	I'll paraphrase.
	There's multiple versions of his quote, but Benjamin Franklin, one of the great statesmen in America and a guy who flew a kite in a lightning storm, said, and those who trade security for privacy or privacy for security really deserve neither.
	And our president, what he said here really just blew me away.
	I specifically said that one of the things that we're going to have to discuss and debate is how are we striking this balance between the need to keep the American people safe Which is not a need, I guess.
	Well, maybe it is in the nanny state.
	And our concerns about privacy.
	Our concerns about privacy, John.
	It's just a concern.
	Because there are some trade-offs involved.
	No, there's no trade-off.
	There shouldn't be any trade-offs.
	I welcome this debate.
	Oh, wait.
	And I think it's healthy for our democracy.
	That's what got me.
	This is healthy for our democracy, John.
	Trading privacy for security is healthy.
	It's a sign of maturity.
	Oh, it's a sign of maturity!
	It was probably five years ago, six years ago.
	We might not have been having this debate.
	And I think it's interesting that there are some folks on the left, but also some folks on the right who are now worried about it, who weren't very worried about it when it was a Republican president.
	I think that's good.
	That we're having this discussion.
	But I think it's important for everybody to understand, and I think the American people understand, Hold on a second.
	That's us, John.
	Shit us in A, shit us in B. Do we...
	We think what?
	That there's some trade-offs involved.
	Yes, I understand there's trade-offs.
	Yeah, of course.
	Yeah?
	Who?
	I came in with a healthy skepticism about these programs.
	No, I think you came in actually with some promises about getting rid of these programs.
	My team evaluated them.
	We scrubbed them thoroughly.
	We actually expanded...
	What does that mean, we scrubbed them?
	Most of my clips have got stuff like this in them.
	Somebody using a word, a screwball word, it's like, why are they doing this?
	Yeah, go on.
	Oversight increased some of the safeguards.
	But my assessment, and my team's assessment, was that They help us prevent terrorist attacks.
	And by the way, this is something that CEOs do a lot when they want to convince people of bullcrap.
	They'll talk about the team.
	You've probably heard this, John, in a company meeting.
	Well, my team, the team.
	Hey, it's the team, man.
	It's not just me.
	It's the team.
	The whole team's behind me.
	We didn't elect your team, okay?
	We elected you, not the team.
	So, of weird words, this was...
	And, of course, I had to look this one up, but this is a term, when you're talking about breaking the law, essentially, or breaking the constitutional law, to use this term specifically was mind-boggling.
	And the modest encroachments...
	Okay, let's look at some analogies of the term modest encroachments.
	Do you have any, John?
	No, but I'm sure you do.
	No, I just have one.
	I just have one.
	Like, don't worry, baby.
	It's only the tip.
	I think that is a good analogy of modest encroachment.
	Privacy that are involved in getting...
	How can you have a modest encroachment on privacy?
	Definition of encroach.
	From, I think this is Merriam-Webster, that'll suffice.
	Encroach to enter by gradual steps or by stealth into the possessions or rights of another.
	But only modestly.
	So he is admitting to a crime.
	Well, yeah, that's true.
	If you look at the overall possibilities of encroachment on privacy, this would be just that, just modest, because it's only tapping your phones and listening to your calls.
	There's no mics in your house.
	There's no guy following you around.
	They're not taking pictures when you leave your house.
	Every one of these is one, one whole unit.
	I could go on and on and on, and they're not coming in and checking your underwear.
	People aren't barreling into the house just to sit with you at dinner.
	So there's all these possibilities that they're not doing.
	It's modest, yes.
	It's very modest.
	So only this one little thing, which is tapping your phone and listening in...
	No, no, no, not listening.
	No, they're not listening yet.
	But it is an encroachment, so he is, in fact, admitting to breaking constitutional law.
	If you take the words by their definition.
	Phone numbers or duration without a name attached and not looking at content.
	Not looking at content.
	No, you don't look at a phone call.
	You listen to a phone call or it's transcribed.
	Maybe that's what he means, that we're not looking at the transcription of it.
	Yet.
	Yet.
	On net, it was worth us doing.
	It was worth doing.
	Why was it worth doing?
	You didn't accomplish it.
	Oh, no, hold on.
	Oh, hold on.
	Worth us doing.
	Some other folks may have a different assessment of that.
	All folks who have a different assessment, raise your hand without talking.
	But I think it's important to recognize that you can't have 100% security.
	And also then have 100% privacy and zero inconvenience.
	That's perfect.
	Benjamin Franklin just threw up.
	I don't know what happened.
	I just puked all over myself in my grave.
	We're going to have to make some choices as a society.
	Make some choices as a society.
	So he's done.
	And remember, he was only going to answer one question.
	And if you watch the video, he leaves the stage, but he has forgotten to address the whole reason behind this coming out, the leak.
	So some dude...
	Just yells out, the leaks, the leaks, the leaks.
	And you know how the president has been when people yell stuff out and he says, I'm going to do one question and one question only.
	He keeps walking.
	He just leaves.
	He doesn't come back.
	And you can see him go, oh crap.
	And he goes back and he's just like, yeah.
	Thank you, guys.
	Thank you.
	Oh, shit.
	All right.
	Yeah.
	Whoa.
	I don't welcome leaks.
	He forgot to mention this.
	So they have a souffleur sitting in the...
	The reporter was botched.
	He should have let him go.
	But this wasn't even a reporter.
	I think this was just one of the dudes.
	Oh, it was a staffer.
	Yes, a souffleur.
	Isn't that what it's called?
	Someone who sits in a little box on stage when you forget your lines?
	A souffleur?
	Yeah.
	Maybe.
	I think this is under the stage with a little trap door.
	You see his head.
	A little trap door opens up.
	No, you don't say that!
	What's my line?
	What's my line?
	It would be funny if a volunteer said, guys, I'm up.
	What's my line?
	That would be funny.
	Because there's a reason why these programs are classified.
	I think that there is a suggestion that somehow...
	Any classified program is a quote-unquote secret program, which is somehow suspicious.
	Yes.
	But the fact of the matter is...
	Well, yes, fact of the matter, if you are the most transparent government in history, yes, that's suspicious.
	In our modern history, there are a whole range of programs that have been classified because when it comes to, for example, fighting terror.
	Oh, terror!
	I mean, he almost is saying terror like George Bush now.
	What's so funny is that he's talking about those leaked documents that got on the net, right?
	Mm-hmm.
	The five slides of probably a 20-hour selection.
	Well, they didn't exactly just get on the net.
	Yeah, but that's what he's talking about.
	Yeah, they were planted or whatever, but it says top secret at the bottom.
	Yeah.
	And it has all this other crap on there, which none of it's really...
	I don't see it.
	It was secret at all.
	I think we've known about this for a long time.
	Anyway, go on.
	Play some more of it.
	Play them out.
	Our goal is to stop folks from doing us harm.
	Wait a minute.
	If the folks are handing you the script and its folks are doing you harm, who are the folks?
	At a certain point, you've got to stop saying they, and you've got to identify.
	You can't just say folks.
	Folks.
	Every step that we're taking to try to prevent a terrorist act is on the front page of the newspapers or on television.
	Then, presumably, the people who are trying to do us harm are going to be able to get around our preventive measures.
	That's why these things are classified.
	There was one measure that was even listed on there.
	It was just a blowout of when these guys started doing deals with Google.
	Exactly.
	Now, let's wind it up as we play them out.
	And if people can't trust not only the executive branch, but also don't trust Congress and don't trust...
	Federal judges.
	Let me see.
	How are we doing?
	Three for three, I think.
	I think he nailed him.
	To make sure that we're abiding by the Constitution, due process, and rule of law, then we're going to have some problems.
	Yes, exactly.
	We have a problem.
	We don't trust the executive office or Congress or the federal judges.
	I think we have plenty of reason to distrust.
	But my observation is that the people who are involved in America's national security...
	They take this work very seriously.
	Yeah, they're not going to screw you.
	They cherish our Constitution.
	And they actually know what's in there.
	The last thing they'd be doing is taking programs like this to listen to somebody's phone calls.
	Now, do you hear how his voice, like he's almost laughing?
	Because this, I had to listen to this several times.
	Where he said the last thing these people want to do is listen to somebody's phone calls.
	Listen.
	Listen.
	Listen to somebody's phone calls.
	What is that all about?
	Listen to somebody's phone calls.
	I don't know why he even did this press conference.
	It just seems like a bonehead move.
	And so, of course, finally, his last statement is obviously the zinger.
	And if people can't trust not only the executive branch, but also don't trust Congress.
	We already did that one.
	So, yeah, so we can't trust the government.
	And...
	And I just found this, you're right, this whole press conference to be weird, ill thought out.
	The fact that I guess they were still making changes to his remarks or something.
	This isn't just something that gets forgotten.
	I'm pretty sure someone was changing something or adding something.
	Well, it's probably...
	I listened to the twerp come out when she took her thank you for putting me in the head of national security.
	And I listened to the way she speaks.
	You mean Susan Rice.
	It took me a second.
	You're talking to the twerp.
	Okay.
	Yes.
	She talks like this.
	When she talks...
	Two people...
	It's very weird.
	So she came out, and it's a long talk she gave, but she took forever to get her words out, and it's always this kind of stilted, weird type of communication that's herky-jerk, and she threw a couple of weird terms in there, too.
	I mean, play this thing, and then I think she was, I believe, as the new honcho, she's the one who was supposed to have the remarks ready, I'll bet.
	Yeah.
	Mr.
	President, thank you so much.
	I'm deeply honored and humbled to serve our country as your National Security Advisor.
	I'm proud to have worked so closely with you for more than six years, and I'm deeply grateful for your enduring confidence in me.
	As you've outlined, we have vital opportunities to seize and ongoing challenges to confront.
	We have much still to accomplish on behalf of the American people, and I look forward to continuing to serve on your national security team to keep our nation strong and safe.
	Tom, it's been a real honor to work with Jan.
	You have led with great dedication, smarts, and skill, and you leave a legacy of enormous accomplishment.
	All of us around the principal's table will miss you, and I wish you and Kathy and your family all the very best.
	I am Borg.
	Okay, so she sounds like a robot.
	So she says you guys got smarts, which seems kind of demeaning if you ask me.
	And what's this principal's table?
	Yeah, it's the grown-up table.
	That's what it is.
	That's a very good catch.
	Can I interrupt for one second?
	It's over.
	No, but the chat room is pointing something out that we missed something, what the president said here.
	And if people can't trust...
	He says, if people can't trust the executive branch and don't trust Congress...
	And if people can't trust not only the executive branch, but also don't trust Congress...
	That's interesting.
	That's a good catch.
	So they can't trust and they don't trust me.
	Yeah, that's a good catch.
	I like that.
	Yeah, I don't know quite what it means, but it's definitely interesting he would do it.
	He's saying, you can't trust me.
	I think that is subliminal if people can't trust me.
	Well, I don't think you can trust him.
	No, no.
	Well, so I've been laughing so, so hard at the Obama bots of just freaking out about this.
	I mean, just like totally, totally freaking out.
	Yeah, no, which is weird because this is not anything.
	Let me tell you an anecdote.
	This is nothing new what they did.
	And I wrote a column last Thursday's PC Magazine you should read, people should read, which is called Your Telecom Provider is the Enemy.
	I don't think that was my title.
	But anyway, that...
	No, it's not a snappy Dvorak title, no.
	No, I don't know why.
	We know a couple of things, and we've known a couple of things.
	Grabbing metadata is nothing new.
	I was shown in the early 1990s when I was in London with the PC Magazine UK, Interpol gave us a lecture on this.
	And they showed how you can use metadata to develop personal networks.
	And they showed an example of an Italian crime family.
	And they had all the same thing that they collected here, just phone, who you called, how long the call was for.
	And so you could put all these numbers together.
	And then they had a network analysis map.
	And they could figure out who the boss of the crime family was based on the way things fell.
	And that's essentially all that's been going on.
	And this is not a big shocker to anybody who keeps up with this, that we've been doing this.
	The more interesting thing, and I pointed out in the column, is what the big picture is, which is what you mentioned earlier, which...
	Is the recording of every call constantly and then storing them in this huge database at warehouses that they're building around the country.
	Mostly I think that monster in Utah, Colorado's got one.
	So what's fascinating to me, though, is that I guess even like Leo Laporte posted this whole thing on his Google Plus page where he's just outraged and like, I gave you thousands of dollars and you're lying.
	Yeah.
	Of all people, he should know what goes on in the technology world.
	Let me just play two quick clips, because it's so funny to see people like Chunk over there at Current TV, who is, without a doubt, he's always been pro-Obama.
	He tries to be fair, but he's done a lot of...
	Really a lot of defending of the president, and he certainly is more left than right.
	He was incensed.
	Well, that's not who we're supposed to be, but that's exactly who Barack Obama is.
	That's who he is.
	Look, people sometimes say, oh, no, no, no, he never promised not to spy on you.
	Yes, he did.
	He promised it right there in the OA campaign.
	So, like, this is supposed to be a big faux pas, like, oh, no, don't do it.
	He lied.
	It's not subtle.
	He said there will be no spying on citizens who are not suspected of a crime.
	He lied.
	There is spying on all of us, and we are not suspected of a crime.
	Barack Obama is a liar.
	Can I make it clearer?
	This is funny because nobody spoke about the Gitmo thing.
	In fact, I have a clip that combines two of these things, which is the Gitmo thing, which by the way I want to mention, but they got a guy from the National Review on Bill Maher's crappy show.
	And when I play my second clip from Bill Maher, then you know why I said crappy.
	So here's the Guantanamo clip.
	This is Bill Maher in Guantanamo.
	So you get the National Review guy talks about that this shouldn't be news to anybody, and then he mentions a few things, and then Maher cuts it off with this weird snide ending.
	In fact, this sort of dragnet approach to these sorts of things goes back a long, long time.
	We had it in the 1990s, possibly even earlier than that.
	Really?
	Yes, some of the surveillance of computer networks, phone records, things like that.
	In the 90s?
	Yeah.
	Before 9-11, we had a number of programs like this already going on.
	It wasn't talked about as much at the time, but they're not exactly new things.
	You know, you've got a lot of people on the right that are really...
	Taking advantage of it, there's an element of selective outrage, I think, there.
	But it's also the fact that you did have a guy who campaigned for president saying, I won't tap your phones, I'm going to get rid of the stuff in the Patriot Act we don't like, I'm going to close down Guantanamo Bay and all the rest of that stuff.
	He's taken the George W. Bush football and run with it.
	If he tried to close Guantanamo Bay, Congress wouldn't let him.
	So let's not spread bullshit right away.
	Okay.
	Oh wait, you're telling me that when he got into office and had owned the Senate and owned the House of Representatives and had the executive branch, he tried to close it.
	But Congress, which is all Democrats, wouldn't look at him?
	If you wrote a million dollar check, wouldn't you be pissed off now too?
	And wouldn't you be like trying to say anything to defend that money that you gave?
	It wasn't his fault, man.
	I'm not dumb.
	I'm not dumb with my money.
	Alright, did we play this other thing here?
	No, no, don't play that.
	Well, can I play you then to Chris Matthews, just because he's funny, not because people watch him anymore.
	He can't do anything but to take it to race all the time.
	He always has to say, you know, they don't want the black man in the White House.
	But he, I mean, of all the things you can say, as a person on a news channel, The things that Chris Matthews says is just ludicrous.
	Not any scandals.
	Peter, again to you, why do they get the idea, and if it isn't ethnic, and I'll just leave the possibility that it's not, why do they just assume evil on the part of Obama?
	I mean, he's raised his whole life has been crystal clear and clean as a whistle and transparent.
	We know his whole life through all the great excellent education he's had, the good work he's done throughout his life.
	He's never been a money grubber.
	He's never done anything wrong in his life, legally, ethically, whatever.
	His family is picture perfect.
	Hold on, hold on.
	I've got to stop.
	I've got to stop.
	Hold on.
	His school records are sealed.
	There's no evidence he ever went to Columbia.
	He's admitted to breaking the law by smoking weed and snorting coke.
	He's lied about his, or at least there was, well, yeah, it was born in Kenya.
	So there's definitely smudges.
	Everybody has smudges to say the least, but to say he's...
	Chris, anything wrong in his life, legally, ethically, whatever, his family is picture perfect, the way he's raised those daughters, everything is clean as a whistle, and yet they just refer to him as evil.
	They just refer to him as the...
	I just gotta believe it's ethnic with these people.
	They've just got a problem with this ethnic presence.
	Ethnic.
	Well, is there any other evidence to justify why they keep calling him a bad man?
	Yeah, he's a bad man.
	Clean as a whistle.
	He should talk to Chunk.
	Liar, liar, liar.
	So Miss Mickey called.
	So he's the last holdout amongst the lefties.
	I mean, even democracy now is all over this guy.
	I know, I know, I know, I know, I know.
	So Chris is the last holdout because he was the first guy who said, I feel the tingling up my leg.
	Yeah, of course I remember.
	He loved the man so much.
	Get a man crush.
	Miss Mickey, I spoke to her...
	Hmm, Friday or Saturday?
	Anyway.
	And so she told me what's going on.
	I said, you know, people are freaking out here.
	She said, well, what?
	And so I told her the story about, you know, because that really hasn't, it's only now starting to really pop in the press where we have a culture here in America where people, you know, you're seeing it.
	I'm getting messages from people saying, man, you were right.
	The guy's the same.
	And of course, Huffington Post literally took a picture that was one of our album art pieces of work And put under it George W. Obama.
	I mean, literally took what we used, God, two years ago maybe?
	I'm sure they just did a Google search with images and it came up with it and there it was.
	And so you're seeing the, really, truly the Obama boss just freaking out.
	And so I tell Mickey this, and she says, this is fantastic.
	I'm like, what do you mean?
	She says, no, this is great, because now people, this is going to be great for the show.
	People are going to wake up.
	They're starting to figure things out.
	I said, well, that's a very positive way of looking at it.
	I think that's great.
	And I subsequently went, okay, I've got to find out what's really going on, because this cannot be the truth.
	This cannot be happening.
	I think I have a theory, if you will.
	Well, let me finish with what I was discussing earlier, which was this column I wrote, which discussed, you know, we already knew about this network analysis thing.
	It's been going on, like this guy said, the 90s, which seemed to have stunned Bill Mars.
	And I've seen the demo.
	In the 90s.
	And what's going on now is this collection of...
	And you have to listen to the end of this thesis.
	The collection of all phone calls all the time.
	And like Obama says, nobody's listening.
	They're just collecting.
	And I think this is genius, by the way, and I point this out in the column.
	The idea will be in the future...
	That if they are going to subpoena your phone records, they will subpoena your old calls.
	Of course, because they got them, yeah.
	They'll pull out the whole file of everything you've talked about since 2002, and they'll listen to it after they get the court order.
	But meanwhile, it's already there, and it's already there, ready to be looked at if you get a warrant.
	So they're going to stick with the law.
	But here's what I think the genius is, and I think the argument is this.
	A warrant to come into my house to look for evidence that I've, you know, done something.
	They can only look for that one piece of evidence according to the Constitution.
	But they are looking for stuff that indicates something I already did.
	So it's actually looking into the past when they come into my house.
	That's the argument they're going to use for these phone calls.
	All we're doing is doing what we do with any other kind of warrant.
	We're looking in the past.
	We couldn't do that before.
	We could get a wiretap and we could start listening to you.
	Wait a minute.
	Here we go.
	Let's look into the past.
	Let's look into the past.
	Exactly.
	So you could go and you grab all of Adam Curry's old phone calls.
	They've been stored and they're safe.
	Nobody's been listening to them.
	But now with the court order, I can't.
	And I'm doing the same thing I would be doing if I went into your house.
	I'm looking for stuff that relates to a past thing.
	That's exactly what this is, and they're going to get away with this.
	Everybody's calls are going to be recorded forever.
	Yes, it's safe.
	It's going to be there.
	It's not going to be listened to casually, although that could happen, by the way.
	We can't overlook that possibility.
	You'll hear this now, because I noticed this as well.
	You will hear people talking about getting a court order to go and listen to them.
	Not to listen to wire.
	The word is no longer wiretap.
	It's go and listen to your calls.
	And I think you're spot on with this, that everything has been recorded and they will go back and they will then subsequently have everything.
	And my God, what a bunch of evidence you have then.
	That's phenomenal.
	Yeah, and I would call this a reverse wire.
	It's a post-crime.
	It's a post-crime and you use a reverse wire.
	It's just genius.
	And nobody's talking about this.
	All they're talking about is this, which is funny because they can't seem to defend themselves against this thing that's been going on since the 90s, which is just getting metadata from the phone companies.
	And I think, by the way, getting the emails, which they're doing the same thing with from Google and all these email providers, they're storing all that stuff too, and that will be part when you get a warrant.
	You also grab all that old email that you've done on your Gmail.
	This is why you should have your own mail server, by the way.
	Yeah, which I think I've had for the past five years.
	Exactly.
	Yeah.
	Would you like to hear my theory, what I've uncovered, what I've come up with here on this?
	Of course.
	Because there's a lot of loose ends.
	You almost got the clip of the day for the Chris Matthews clip.
	I want it to be for something of value, not just a throwaway.
	That's some lame guy.
	This guy's terrible.
	Let's thank our producers first.
	I think we have a very short list.
	We do have a long list of being Swazzle Nuff Day, of course, so we'll get into that in a moment.
	We have actually, almost everybody was a Swazzle Nuffer.
	We broke the record.
	We'll get to that later.
	Yeah.
	But right now, let's take a look at, as I open it.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	We have, I don't know why it always opens in this funny way, halfway down.
	We have one executive producer and one associate executive producer for show 520.
	No 520 club members.
	Sir Craig of Manamana.
	Manamana.
	In the UK, Dorothy and Lillian, he addresses us.
	Finally, I found the comment box for my PayPal comment.
	I finally found it.
	Okay.
	And the irony is I have nothing to say except to request some job karma and a dash of travel karma on the side for my upcoming holiday.
	Absolutely, Sir Craig of Manamana.
	Thank you very much.
	From Dorothy and Lillian.
	You've got karma.
	Thank you for addressing us properly by our proper names, Dorothy and Lillian.
	And then we have...
	Henry Reese of Nagoya, Japan, who I thought sent me a note.
	I don't recall an email, so maybe...
	No, no, it came in the mail.
	Well, I'm sorry.
	No, that's not sufficient.
	I have to go downstairs and dig around, but I brought the notes up, but I don't see his.
	When you come to school, you need to come prepared.
	Maybe this is it.
	No, this isn't it.
	I mean, the dog ate your homework?
	Oh, wait a minute.
	Uh-huh.
	See, I'm not giving up that easy.
	Oh, okay.
	No, hold on a second.
	Mm-hmm.
	Holding on.
	Holding on.
	I'm still holding on.
	Maybe I'll play some Harry Reid while we're holding on.
	Right now, I think everyone should just calm down and understand this isn't anything that is brand new.
	It's been going on for some seven years, and we've tried...
	Often, to try to make it better, and we'll continue to do that.
	Calm down, slaves.
	Resume normal activities, says Harry Reid.
	What did he even say?
	He said, calm down.
	I was looking at last week's notes that I brought to this desk.
	Make a Sunday donation.
	I don't like the short list of producers.
	I'm donating 26667 to get the halfway to knighthood.
	Dear John and Adam, Henry Reese from Gitmo Nation teetering.
	Teetering?
	Yeah, teetering.
	As in ready to collapse, I guess.
	Ready to collapse, yeah, I guess.
	On the edge.
	Very nice.
	Living here on a broken income in Nagoya, Japan.
	Adam...
	Yes.
	Stop with the Joe Biden president routine.
	Why?
	I don't know.
	He doesn't say why.
	And may I point out...
	Maybe it's scaring him.
	May I point out that a number of people sent in and said, here's what happened with Gerald Ford.
	Gerald Ford became president, was never elected.
	And what happened is Spiro Agnew had to leave because he was caught cheating or taking a bribe.
	Then President Nixon said, oh, you know what?
	Why don't I bring in this guy, Gerald Ford?
	Then Nixon got impeached or he left during his impeachment.
	Gerald Ford became president.
	First time...
	A man became president who was not elected for any office.
	So my theory could actually...
	I thought Gerald Ford was a senator or something somewhere.
	He was...
	Yeah, book of knowledge.
	Yeah, well, let me see.
	I have...
	I actually did look it up.
	And here we go.
	It's so hard to read the book of knowledge.
	But a lot of, a number of people sent this to me.
	I don't think he was, darling.
	See, on October 10th, Agnew Reside pleaded no contest of criminal charges.
	House of Representatives.
	He's a House member from 49 to 73.
	Long haul in the House.
	But the point is, he was not elected to the executive office, and certainly not elected to be president.
	No, it was a fluke.
	But you say he was never elected to any...
	I'm sorry.
	Well, maybe he was Boy Scout leader.
	No, he was still in the house.
	He was pulled from the house.
	But what's interesting is House Speaker Carl Albert said, we gave Nixon no choice but Ford.
	So, you know, you can smell.
	You can smell it.
	Some kind of setup there.
	And, of course, he was a boob.
	Actually, he was considered really a good House member.
	Not a boob at all.
	Anyway, let's get back to the letter from our friend in Japan.
	Yes, please.
	John, I also heard stories of candles burning down many fine old houses during my hippie days in Eugene and Portland.
	Okay.
	Yeah?
	They need some karma, a de-douching, and a noodle guy.
	A noodle guy?
	Yeah, the noodle guy.
	The whole noodle kid clip?
	Yeah, I'm always game for it.
	Okay, you caught me off guard here.
	Let me see.
	Where's the...
	I have a noodle laugh.
	I think I have that.
	Let me see what this is.
	I don't know.
	I don't think I... Do I have the noodle kids?
	What was that?
	I don't know.
	You're catching me off guard with this.
	You're like, oh, now we need the noodle guy.
	Let me do the karma and the de-douching first.
	I mean, de-douche first.
	You've been de-douched.
	You've got karma.
	I didn't know you.
	There was no...
	We'll give him the noodle guy when you find it.
	I feel bad.
	I don't have the noodle kid ready.
	Yeah, I always thought I was at the ready.
	So anyway, those are executive and associate executive producers for show 520.
	And I want to thank them and remind people that we do have a show coming up on Thursday and we need continued support.
	Dvorak.org slash NA. Yes, indeed.
	Here's your noodles, kid.
	Well, like I described earlier, there are two fundamental classes that are just a plain fact in society.
	You either work for someone else, or you work for yourself.
	And most people work for someone else in a way that they aren't free.
	You don't really get to decide your work.
	For example, I work at Noodles, a restaurant.
	And basically it's a dictatorship there.
	We're told exactly what we're going to cook, how we're going to cook it, what time we're going to get there.
	And basically, if they don't like what they're doing, they try to tell us what to do.
	If we don't listen, they get rid of us.
	And so we're not able to actually cooperate in a way that we make decisions together.
	I try to convince my fellow employees that we should have a union at Moodle.
	So it's a source of power to start with.
	And then I think in terms of the bigger picture, when you look at revolutions, the way that you actually get rid of any sort of dictatorship is by having workers take control of the place where they work.
	Would your plan, your vision for Noodles, would it include the owner?
	What capacity would he be granted?
	If the owner wanted to cooperate with us as an equal and provide his skills that he had, we would definitely cooperate with him.
	We'd have to abdicate his position as being an owner and controller of us, and he would have to recognize that we run noodles together, and basically, if he doesn't want to cooperate with us, he's against us.
	There you go.
	The owner's against us.
	They tell us where we have to cook, man.
	And they tell us what time to come in.
	Yeah, this is bad.
	This is dictator.
	Dictator.
	Oh, man.
	Well, there you go.
	Once in a while, you've got to bring the noodle kit out.
	That noodle kit, we need to bring him in once every six months.
	Yeah, we've got to do it.
	It's like clockwork.
	It just picks me up and it gives me a little boost.
	Well, hold on.
	Let me do the whole...
	Dvorak.org slash N-A. And let me say in the morning to you, John C. Dvorak.
	In the morning to you, Adam Curry.
	In the morning to all ships and sea boots on the ground, feet in the air, subs in the water, and all the dames and knights out there.
	Our artist, thank you very much, Joshua Pettigrew, who created the art for episode 519er.
	Highly appreciated.
	Noagendaartgenerator.com is where you can find more information.
	And already playing a role in today's show, thank you very much to the chat room, Noagenda...
	chat.net, NoagendaStream.com.
	Did I get that the right way around?
	I'm not sure.
	And you out there, please continue to propagate our formula.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Mew.
	Water.
	Water.
	I think that's an evergreen.
	Ha, ha, ha.
	Whatever it is.
	With the noodles laughing?
	Laughing.
	It's in the Evergreen box.
	That's why I grabbed it.
	I don't know what it is.
	So a friend of mine in the UK... You said so.
	And we've got to stop saying so.
	Thank you.
	I appreciate that.
	I've said it four times myself this morning, and it's bugging the shit out of me.
	I haven't heard it, but I should be paying more careful attention to catch you doing it.
	Go ahead.
	Yes, we're trying to, for everyone listening, we're trying to eliminate the use of the word so.
	There's some other words.
	Never.
	Eva, yes.
	Awesome.
	Amazing.
	Amazing.
	Amazing is out.
	It's got to go.
	And any who is also off the list.
	That was never on the list.
	I'm telling you, they were scrambling my brains.
	I know they were scrambling my brains.
	Can I give you my theory, or do you want to talk about your UK guy?
	It could be a lead-in.
	I just want to mention, we have a friend of mine, actually...
	Teresa Holcomb is married to a famous harmonica player who must cringe as he hears me.
	And I got them into the show because Teresa came out to visit with Mimi.
	They're all down here partying.
	Partying?
	Wait a minute.
	You're partying?
	Well, I wasn't.
	I was working on the show.
	What kind of party are they doing?
	They're out floating around.
	I have no idea.
	Hanging out with comics.
	Teresa's a comic.
	And Mimi used to produce it.
	So anyway...
	I said so again.
	Yep.
	I thought it the second time, though.
	Yeah, that's all right.
	It's hard.
	It's very hard.
	It's going to be a tough one.
	Yeah.
	I noticed that Obama was saying the fact of the matter, the fact of the matter, the fact of the matter.
	We've broken ourselves at that horrible habit.
	So, ah, I did it again.
	Anyway.
	Just don't...
	It's hard.
	It's hard.
	I know it's hard.
	Teresa said that...
	That Mitt was a conspiracy, turning into a conspiracy nut, UK style.
	Who's Mitt?
	Is that her husband, you mean?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	And I said, well, you've got to get him to listen to the No Agenda show.
	Right.
	She got him to listen to the show, and he says he can't understand a word we're talking.
	And I was listening to the way we did the opening, and we started to talk about our producers and the douchebags and all the rest.
	And I realized that we're so way ahead of a new listener.
	Yeah.
	It's really problematic.
	Bollocks!
	I said, you've got to read the No Agenda page in the Wikipedia and maybe that would help.
	It's tea time, everybody!
	Maybe he understands that.
	Or, this is my favorite.
	This is a fact.
	Yeah, there you go.
	Fact.
	So he couldn't understand any of it.
	And I said so.
	He could not understand any of...
	Did he give up?
	Did he get into it?
	At a certain point, you do understand what's going on.
	So he hasn't given up yet.
	Okay.
	Let's try this on him.
	Maybe this will work.
	I'm 11, and even I can spot a douchebag.
	His daughter seems to understand it.
	That's his daughter?
	Yeah.
	Cool.
	I like it.
	That's a good jingle, by the way.
	I like that one a lot.
	After the conversation with Miss Mickey, I'm thinking, I have to think like no agenda.
	And it's been very good being completely isolated because the path I went down, I don't think I, if I had been distracted by anything, I might not have figured out a few interesting points in this whole prism affair.
	The main thing, as a no agenda producer, and I put myself in the listeners chair and our listeners are producers, it was all a little too easy.
	You know what I mean?
	I felt the same way.
	It looked rigged.
	Yeah, a little rigged.
	And here's another thing.
	When you're doing these slides, at the bottom of these slides it says, Top Secret!
	And I found that to be a little weird.
	Let's face it, they need some templates or something.
	Their PowerPoints are horrendous.
	If you're doing a PowerPoint presentation, generally speaking, especially to a larger group, would you put all that crap at the bottom?
	I don't think so.
	I think that was just a distractive.
	Okay, so you had the same feeling I had.
	And the journey really started for me with an interview on a podcast.
	Oh, I feel stupid now.
	I forgot the name of the podcast.
	Well, the guy who was being interviewed is Ray McGovern.
	And Ray McGovern was an analyst for the CIA during the Kennedy administration.
	And he's a blogger now, essentially.
	He's retired.
	And he's on the program.
	Because he wrote this article...
	...called Doubting Obama's Resolve to Do Right, wherein he essentially calls the president a wuss.
	And I'll get to why he called him that in a moment.
	So here's just, I think, 30 or 40 seconds of part of...
	Are you okay?
	Yeah, I'm okay.
	That was a weird sound.
	Here is part of what kind of got me onto...
	And this is an anecdote that I found very interesting.
	And I know from a good friend who was there when it happened...
	That at a small dinner with progressive supporters, after these progressive supporters were banging on Obama before the election, why don't you do the things we thought you stood for, Obama turned sharply and said, don't you remember what happened to Martin Luther King Jr.?
	That's a quote.
	And that's a very revealing quote.
	The other thing is, I've always been kind of shocked that when he came into office, Not only did he not prosecute the torturers or the kidnappers, the people with the black prisons or even the people who violated our Fourth Amendment rights, he left them all in place.
	And, you know, I suspected at the time, and now I'm pretty convinced, the President of the United States is afraid of the CIA. So, oh, I said it.
	I really like that, where he said the President of the United States is afraid of the CIA, and this makes sense in our general thesis that we...
	Ed, we've been saying this for what?
	Yes.
	Well...
	Since Obama first got elected, we knew there was a feud.
	Right.
	Well, not just a feud, but even Ron Paul said...
	Actually, I looked for that clip.
	I couldn't find it where he said, look, the CIA has taken over.
	They're running the joint.
	What?
	They took it from you.
	It's been scrubbed.
	They scrubbed it.
	Now, in his article...
	By the way, I have an outline for the show notes, which is not just an outline, but also indented.
	This whole story I'm about to tell you, you can go and follow the steps and see if I went wrong or see if you like what I came up with.
	So you can do that after the fact, 520.nashownotes.com.
	So in this article, he says the CIA is messing with Obama's head.
	And this is where he contradicts our initial theory and says the hecklers are put in place by the CIA to show Obama we can get to you at any time.
	Well, we've had this thesis too.
	I think there was a number of incidents where suddenly something crazy happened, which was that sort of thing.
	I can't remember the details, but we've spotted this trick a couple of times.
	But this has been happening a lot in recent memory, and so you take into account the president saying, hey man, I don't want to be Martin Luther King, I don't want to get shot, and that he's afraid, and then the CIA possibly, and I think it's more likely than it's scripted.
	I don't know.
	How do I bring this into prison?
	First of all, the CIA runs everything.
	Now, the feuds, we, without doubt, have identified and have played many different anecdotes of people saying the CIA, they hate all the other intelligence agencies.
	I'm pretty sure that they would love to get one over on the NSA. So let's presume for a moment this may be...
	The NSA has been uncooperative.
	Very uncooperative.
	We've noticed this, we've reported this, I don't know, for years now, the NSA, and they're arrogant.
	Now what if we could make the president look bad...
	At the same time, distract everyone from the true bad actor in the cyber world.
	I'm not talking about phone calls, but in the cyber world, so that we could really continue our massive surveillance program without anyone, and of course, hiding it in plain sight, without anyone suspecting what we're doing because everyone's focused on something else.
	Crap, I did it.
	Looking at what we know already, obviously Google, I mean, are you kidding me?
	In 2010, they had to admit, yes, we have the NSA Alliance program.
	This is not like a secret.
	This has been out there for years.
	Google and the NSA have a department.
	They have a joint venture discussed in mainstream media even.
	The court's upheld Google's denial and the NSA's denial of a Freedom of Information Act request that they could keep it secret.
	So this is new.
	Oh, and by the way, we do all remember that after 180 days, the government has the right to read your email anyway.
	I mean, did we forget this all of a sudden?
	This is the biggest joke there is.
	Right.
	Did we forget this all of a sudden, that this has already been out there?
	And if your email's over 100...
	80 days old.
	And it's stored on an email service.
	Any service, any of them.
	The government can look at it without a warrant.
	Now let's just grab one.
	Let's look at Facebook.
	So Facebook, we know that Facebook, one of their venture capital founding funders was In-Q-Tel, which is the intelligence agency's venture capital fund.
	And Person of the Year 2010, Mark Zuckerberg, Time Magazine.
	Oh, how quickly we forget.
	I've pointed this out to a couple of my Obama bot friends who were like, how is this possible?
	I said, well, let's just read your leftist propaganda and the relevant paragraph from this article.
	And we talked about this on the show that no one picks up on this.
	We talked about this numerous times.
	The door opened and a distinguished looking gray haired man burst in.
	It's the only way to describe his entrance, trailed by a couple of deputies.
	He was both the oldest person in the room by 20 years and the only one wearing a suit.
	He was in the building, he explained, with the delighted air of a man about to secure ironclad bragging rights forever, and he had just had to stop in to introduce himself to Zuckerberg.
	Robert Mueller, director of the FBI, pleased to meet you.
	Are you kidding me?
	Did no one see this?
	I love that paragraph.
	Yeah.
	So, yes, the FBI is in there.
	And it was put in there for code.
	I mean, that was put in the article so everyone that was in whatever circle that was being transmitted to, oh, okay, we're good now.
	We're in.
	What we're seeing is Silicon Valley freaking out now.
	Because of course they cooperate.
	It's all part of the sharing program.
	And I truly believe, John, that they've been taken off guard.
	They're like, whoa, wait a minute.
	You're accusing us of what?
	So they're all very careful with their little wording.
	We don't give you direct access and all this stuff.
	By the way, did you see Jeff Jarvis defending Google?
	Jeff Jarvis is a Google stooge.
	He might as well just work for him.
	He's like, I take Larry Page at his literal word.
	So, in other words, whatever Larry said literally, I take him at his word.
	And then he talks about conspiratorial thinking about these companies.
	Oh, this can't be true.
	There's no gambling going on here.
	Okay.
	But I have a feeling.
	I have a feeling.
	That they were really taken off guard with this.
	Now, we look at this PowerPoint, and as we just discussed, what kind of PowerPoint is this?
	What I found immediately interesting was to note that Apple was added to this so-called PRISM program six months after Steve Jobs died.
	I've always heard that Steve Jobs, this is definitely a conspiratorial story, that the government always wanted a backdoor into everything.
	Microsoft rolled over like a bitch puppy.
	Yes, but you don't even need a backdoor to break into windows.
	It's so easy to compromise it.
	But that Jobs always said, no, I'm not going to let you into my system.
	And that sounds like him.
	We'll get back to jobs later.
	In fact, I know that there was probably some struggle at Microsoft.
	I don't think they rolled over that quickly because here's the problem with having that NSA.dat or whatever.
	There were these little pieces of code that were floating around.
	The DLL system or the registry or whatever.
	Is that...
	You ruin foreign sales.
	I mean, you can't take this product into France or Germany and expect anyone to use it if it's just a Trojan horse as a whole for the NSA. It's just not possible.
	And there's all these stories about an Israeli back-end and all these things.
	But I have heard many, many times Steve Jobs won't allow that to happen.
	And so I found it interesting.
	We'll get back to the Apple thing, but I know as well.
	So Apple jumps on...
	And then what happened to Steve Jobs?
	Well, I'll get back to that.
	He's dead.
	So Apple jumps on board...
	So you think they killed him?
	Would you let me get to my story?
	There's so much more to talk about.
	I mean, if that would be the conclusion of the story, which it is, that would be sad.
	There's a lot more to talk about.
	So the leaks come out through a guy named Glenn Greenwald.
	You have to go back to the source.
	No one is questioning this.
	Very disturbing to me.
	Who is Glenn Greenwald?
	Glenn Greenwald is an outstanding columnist.
	He was a total lefty.
	I do follow him.
	He used to be with Salon Magazine.
	And he's one of those progressive progressives that's gone beyond being on Obamabot and is nothing but critical of the president.
	And then somehow, I don't know how this even hooks up with him, but he's the one who rolled it out in the Guardian.
	Well, there you go.
	There's something fishy about what the progress was, and I guess you're going to tell me.
	Yes, that is correct, John.
	That's where I started.
	So here's what I learned briefly about Glenn Greenwald.
	He's a former lawyer.
	He was a civil rights lawyer, and many people have said some nasty things about his work as a civil rights lawyer, but I don't think that is important.
	He lives in Brazil with his boyfriend, and he worked at Salon Magazine since 2007 before a, I would say, a high-profile move to Guardian USA less than a year ago, so he's been a So, God damn it, I keep saying so.
	To me, very interesting to see Glenn's move to The Guardian, and here he is, the biggest story of the century, really, for him.
	As you say, he's so left that he really is, I would say he almost hates the president.
	And part of his reasoning for not liking the president for many years was the Defense of Marriage Act.
	And, you know, he's gay, so he's in Brazil.
	It's like, I can't live in America because America's all effed up, and so I'm living in Brazil.
	So he's been very, very critical of all that.
	But more importantly, he loves Petraeus.
	And I went back to...
	What?
	Yes.
	Oh, yeah.
	Well, let me put it this way.
	He defended what happened to Petraeus.
	So Petraeus, as you recall, was director of the CIA, and John Brennan, who our friend McGovern says, Brennan in, because he's so afraid of the CIA, he thought, I have loyalty from Brennan, so they won't try to kill me because Brennan's running the show.
	Remember, Brennan is appointed by the president.
	So the president was so afraid of the CIA, he said, Brennan, and also he said, let's get the drones out of the CIA before they drone me or whatever.
	And so Brennan was brought in.
	Glenn Greenwald...
	Public fight!
	If you go back and read his columns, which apparently you follow him, he was like...
	Brennan is the worst guy ever.
	You can't have him in.
	And on Petraeus, I just have a little clip here from Democracy Now.
	Instead of saying, you know, Petraeus is a douchebag, elitist douchebag, no, he immediately goes and bitches about the FBI! I think there's a lot of media focus on the salacious aspects of this case for reasons that are obvious, which is that the media loves sex scandals.
	But there are real issues arising from this of genuine importance and substance, beginning with the fact that That the FBI, based on really no evidence of any actual crime, engaged in this massive surveillance effort of first obtaining all kinds of intimate and private information about two women, one of whom complained, one of whom was the target of the complaint, Paula Broadwell and Jill Kelly.
	Learned the locations and email accounts of Paula Broadwell, who was the subject of this fairly innocuous complaint, read through all of her emails, learned the identity of her anonymous lover, David Petraeus, certainly read through all of her emails, probably read through his,
	and then in the process as well, learned about an affair between the complainant, Jill Kelly, or not an affair, but inappropriate communications, as they're calling it, and the four-star general in Afghanistan, General Allen and then obtained 20,000 to 30,000 pages of emails between them as well.
	So you're talking about a massively invasive investigation without any of their knowledge, obtaining their most private and intimate communications, all without evidence of any predicate crime, really without the need, except in a few cases, for judicial review or oversight.
	And to me, it really illustrates how invasive and sprawling this unaccountable surveillance state has become.
	This happens all the time.
	There's generally the people less powerful and influential than the two generals in question here, and so we can really learn lessons, I hope, about what we've allowed the government to do in terms of its investigative powers.
	Instead of saying, well, wow, this is really not okay, what the CIA director was doing, the title of his article, that's why he was invited on to Democracy Now!
	was, FBI's abuse of the surveillance state is the real scandal here.
	Regarding John Brennan being picked as CIA chief, He wrote, Brennan's appointment is crossing multiple lines that no Obama supporter should sanction.
	So he was very much against that.
	So I believe that he is possibly compromised, and that's not the first time you'd hear about the CIA using people in the press or writing stories for them.
	So I'm like, okay, maybe there's something to this.
	Um...
	So Glenn Greenwald, now we have friends, by the way, inside all the alphabet letter agencies.
	We have NSA challenge coins.
	But I've never received anything as cool as this.
	I mean, getting a PowerPoint like that?
	I mean, wow, we don't get past the gift shop.
	But Glenn Greenwald in the New York Times says, the leak came from, quote, a reader of mine who was comfortable working with me.
	The source, Mr.
	Greenwald said, quote, knew the views that I had and had an expectation of how I would display them.
	I'm thinking, really?
	It's that simple?
	You're telling me that we have all these people inside the NSA and other agencies, but your source gets a hold of this PowerPoint.
	So I'm thinking this is either bullcrap, or it's much higher up than we could ever be, or perhaps maybe it's a little combination.
	So now I'm going to look into Mr.
	Greenwald's history as a journalist.
	So he's a journalist.
	He started out at Salon Magazine when he became a blogger.
	Now, Salon Magazine is very interesting.
	It is a publicly listed company, so there's all kinds of information available about them.
	Current stock price of Salon Magazine, the Salon Media Publishing Empire, is 11 cents a share, John.
	Yeah, I know.
	It's a good deal.
	They lose a million dollars a year, have never been profitable, ever.
	Yeah.
	And I'm like, well, that's kind of interesting.
	Who is funding this outfit?
	Yeah.
	By the way, that's kind of interesting when you consider all these other little startups that have come and gone tech crunch and all these other guys that get bought for millions of dollars and get incorporated into AOL and other things.
	Salon has always been, never been up for grabs.
	I find that actually peculiar, but go on.
	Coming from a corporate a-hole shill background, particularly when it comes to funding companies, I also was like, well, how does something continue to exist?
	They've got to have some sugar daddy, someone who is paying for this, and if they're paying for it, then there's a reason for that as well.
	So there's got to be something behind this.
	So it has been unprofitable throughout its entire history, all this public knowledge.
	But since 2007, two board members, including the chairman of the board, have been funding the company with approximately $3 to $4 million a year.
	These two gentlemen are John Warnock and William Hambrecht.
	Are you familiar with these names, John?
	I know these guys.
	Yes.
	William Hambrecht is, of course, one of the founders of one of the largest Silicon Valley venture capital companies.
	And John Warnock is the CEO, I believe, of Adobe.
	Chairman.
	Chairman of Adobe.
	And all this information is in the show notes.
	And Bill Hambrick's daughter, I might point out, is the president of Salon Magazine.
	So, you know, that's a good hire right there.
	So if you think about for a second all of the companies that were mentioned in the PRISM document, all the companies that could compromise data that's centrally located, what is the one company that really is inside the CIA and the NSA and the FBI what is the one company that really is inside the CIA and the NSA and the FBI that Thank you.
	That is Adobe.
	And that is primarily Adobe with their reader, Acrobat.
	They have this thing called F-Secure, which is to redact PDF files.
	PDF files, there's such a black box PDF by itself.
	But let's, of course, look at what we all think of outside of the creative suite of Adobe.
	We always think about Flash.
	Let's go back to the dead man talking to me.
	The dead man being Steve Jobs, who refused to put Flash into iOS.
	And he wrote a letter in 2010, I think, or 11.
	He wrote a letter called His Thoughts on Flash, and he outlined a number of reasons why he didn't want Adobe in iOS.
	Third, there's reliability, security, and performance.
	Symantec recently highlighted Flash for having one of the worst security records in 2009.
	We also know firsthand that Flash is the number one reason Mac's crash.
	We've been working with Adobe to fix these problems, but have persisted for several years, and we don't want to reduce the reliability and security of our iPhones, iPods, and iPads by adding Flash.
	And if you read now, headline from the register from June 9th, that would be today, maybe it was yesterday, maybe it was the 8th that this came out, Steve Jobs' death clears way for Adobe CTO defection.
	The CTO of Adobe has just left to join Apple, and there is some question whether maybe Flash will come to the iPhone, which I'll get to in just a moment.
	Now, we know that Flash has been a security risk.
	There's been exploits.
	It's been accused of phoning home.
	It's also on every single computing device, pretty much except for the iOS platform.
	Most guys who are security conscious that I know, sysadmins, won't run it.
	They refuse, like, oh, I can't watch that video.
	Which is why Steve Jobs, I believe, said, no Flash, that thing's a mess.
	But maybe he knew a little bit more.
	Maybe he knew that really what Flash is, it really is a true spying mechanism.
	It can access your camera, your microphone.
	It can do all kinds of things.
	Flash cookies are really very persistent, very hard to get rid of.
	And who uses these things?
	The advertising world.
	So I'm thinking to myself...
	If Adobe truly were evil, and Adobe wants to get this document out and make all the competitors look like horrible people so they can go on their merry way and really aggregate the data of the people, not go in and sift it, but really get the data directly right off your computer, which can be keystrokes for all I know.
	It could be anything.
	Flash is very, very sophisticated, but it's a black box.
	We can't look inside of all of it.
	Of course you can't have Flash just dialing home.
	People would catch on to that.
	But what is the one thing in this entire conversation that everyone just dismisses offhand?
	Well, advertising networks track you.
	Yeah, well, I guess it's a good trade-off.
	Why wouldn't Adobe acquire an advertising network?
	Well, as it turns out, Adobe acquired something better, which is a company which was funded by our friend Warnock's buddy, William, Omniture.
	Omniture, which they bought for $3 billion, Omniture is the statistics system of the advertising industry.
	And Omniture is a company that was started by a guy called Josh James in Utah as a part of the Church of Latter-day Saints, i.e.
	the Mormons who have the largest database of human beings on the universe, or in the universe.
	What I'm seeing is I'm seeing Adobe is the true bad actor.
	And how many times do they upgrade their flash and it's still sucking and it's crashing?
	And they have Omniture embedded.
	And they're not hiding anything.
	They're tracking you.
	And most people go, oh, well, you know, it's just advertising, obviously, you know, whatever.
	We don't really know what the data is that's being sent back.
	But it's there.
	It's open.
	It's free and clear.
	Omniture tracking.
	And people say, it's just advertising.
	It's not the government.
	No, I think this is by far worse.
	And this now makes sense to me that Steve Jobs knew that these guys were up to no good and he didn't want any part of it.
	Now, of course, none of this would make sense unless you could also really put this on all iOS devices.
	And here's where I think Apple is now on board with the program.
	We've got Tim Cook, who probably doesn't have the same scruples as Steve Jobs.
	And you need to know that Adobe acquired a video ad platform called Auditude.
	Just recently, $120 million acquisition.
	And they immediately turned this around, and you can't buy ads with them, not as far as I can tell from their website, but they've turned this into Adobe Primetime.
	It's called Project Primetime.
	It's a video platform, and it will now come to iOS.
	It will work on everything.
	This is what the CTO guy is coming to do, and it essentially has Flash built into it.
	And they were at NAB making deals with every single broadcaster.
	And they will become the streaming video provider of choice because they're going to give it all away.
	And now they have successfully put in the true, true spying mechanism into every single computing device on the planet, sucking that data out right in plain sight.
	Going back into the databases, and they have huge data centers through Omniture, and that's the company that you need to be afraid of.
	And that's the company that the CIA, maybe the NSA, but I think these guys, they'll sell it to anybody.
	We know the Mormons, they sell their database to Ancestry.com.
	They're just selling it.
	So there's nothing sneaky, and that's why Google and Yahoo and Microsoft are all like, what?
	They were taken off guard.
	Because they have no idea what's happening.
	But these guys, these guys, directly tied into Glenn Greenwald, directly, they are the ones that are behind this.
	Well, a couple things.
	I like the way you piece this together.
	You'll be getting a call from Glenn Beck.
	Because you threw a lot of stuff into one thesis that looks like it makes sense, except a couple of little items.
	One, these companies that you say were caught off guard, it was curious that they all had pretty much the exact same wordage to their denials.
	And I don't think they all called each other, say, what are you going to say?
	What are you going to say?
	That doesn't detract from what's happening.
	No, I'm not saying that, but I don't think they were as caught off as much guard as you might imagine.
	But to call me Glenn Beck is a huge insult after I did all that work.
	I'm sorry.
	I didn't call you Glenn Beck.
	I said he'd be calling you.
	Oh.
	I guess you were saying that I didn't like Glenn Beck or something, which is insulting, too.
	Ah, it's not meant to be.
	Okay.
	Play the weasel words for data capture, and I think there's a couple of little things in there that I at least want to bounce off.
	The U.S. National Security Agency and the FBI are tapping directly into the central servers of nine leading U.S. Internet companies.
	That's according to a report in the Washington Post.
	It comes in the back of Britain's Guardian newspaper claiming Washington is collecting telephone records of millions of Americans.
	Google, Apple, Yahoo and Facebook have in statements denied the government had direct access to their central servers.
	Microsoft said it does not voluntarily take part in any government data collection.
	I'd like to say two things.
	One, be reminded the Guardian was in direct cahoots with WikiLeaks, but not like they took WikiLeaks and published it in their newspaper.
	No, we now know, and it's been published everywhere, that the Guardian would then call up the State Department and say, hey, we're going to publish this.
	Is that okay?
	Well, no, could you take that out?
	Could you take that out?
	So the New York Times.
	But if you truly, if you want to really, instead of having to go, yes, of course, of course this is taking place with these companies, but if you really want to have the information of everybody, it's a pain.
	No, I'm not going to argue this.
	What I wanted to point out is Microsoft's comment, which now has been lost to the history, but where they said they don't voluntarily do anything, which means that I think that there's some other program in place which is forcing them to do stuff.
	Since they use the word volunteer, meaning they don't wrap up the date and send it in.
	But this is the point that you made earlier.
	This is not news.
	We know that they're doing this.
	We know that this has been going on.
	We know that the FBI is in Facebook.
	We know that the NSA is in Google.
	But this is all peanuts.
	That's my point.
	It's peanuts and it's distracting from what's really going on right in front of our noses.
	I wish they would get rid of Flash.
	Flash, when I was doing the X3 show, Joe Ango went on to a rant about how Flash, and talk about the cookies you can't get rid of.
	It does all kinds of stuff you can't get rid of.
	There's nothing you can do.
	When you get a whatever it is that you might get planted through a flash, it's impossible to get it off your machine.
	And Steve Jobs knew this.
	He knew they were up to no good.
	He was very famous for hating a lot of these kinds of people.
	Really getting into big feuds with guys exactly like this.
	Exactly like this.
	And I think for these reasons.
	And how many truly elite superstars, super rich people do we know that still die of cancer today?
	Not a lot.
	If you look at the cancer rate amongst the citizens, besides Steve Jobs, who else of super elite status, way up there in the echelons, has died of cancer in recent memory?
	Hugo Chavez, another enemy of the state.
	Give me another one.
	Exactly.
	They would all be enemies of the state.
	Yes.
	Well, Steve Jobs was an enemy of the state.
	But I think you've got an interesting thesis and I like it.
	But it doesn't detract from my red book prediction.
	Way to backpedal, dude.
	It doesn't detract from my prediction some weeks back that once they got these scandals going, they were going to pile on to get rid of Obama.
	And I think that you can't ignore that this is part of that.
	Well, we also, in this, it's funny, did we not play that?
	Did we not play where the president said that he would probably, he might be gone by the next three and a half years?
	Did we play that piece?
	No, you didn't play it.
	You haven't?
	Yes.
	It's at the end of this clip, I think.
	People can't trust not only the executive branch, but also don't trust Congress and don't trust Congress.
	It was very weird.
	I'm actually amazed I didn't play it earlier.
	...due process and rule of law, then we're going to have some problems here.
	But my observation is that the people who are involved in America's national security...
	Let me see if I can roll this forward a little bit.
	...terish our Constitution.
	Forward.
	And by the way, after that I will be a private citizen.
	Here we go.
	And I suspect...
	I went too far.
	Privacy issues?
	I will leave this office at some point.
	Sometime in the next three and a half years.
	Maybe earlier.
	I don't know.
	Could be sometime.
	Maybe next year.
	Maybe next month.
	Well, maybe.
	There's two interesting clips that are also floating around that seem to have been regurgitated into the net to pile on Obama.
	And one of them, I got the two here, they're floating around.
	I didn't have to do any digging.
	I didn't have to go to C-SPAN. They're just out there.
	Which is the one where Laffer lies to Congress.
	You can play that.
	Okay.
	So, what I wanted to see is if you could give me...
	Is this Laffer or Clapper?
	Clapper.
	Okay, I think it's Clapper.
	Okay.
	No, no, it's Laffer, the new guy.
	This is Laffer.
	That was the new guy.
	So wait, wait, wait.
	This is months ago.
	And this is White in one of those committee meetings.
	So what I wanted to see is if you could give me a yes or no answer to the question, does the NSA collect any type of data at all on millions or hundreds of millions of Americans?
	No, sir.
	It does not.
	Not wittingly.
	There are cases where they could inadvertently, perhaps, collect, but not wittingly.
	It's like, she fell onto my penis!
	I can't, it just happened!
	So he's done.
	Meanwhile, Holder, who's no idiot.
	Yeah, that was my favorite.
	So Holder comes out and says the following, which is actually a frightening answer if you think about it.
	I want to just ask, could you assure to us that no phones inside the Capitol were monitored of members of Congress that would give a future executive branch, if they started pulling this kind of thing off, would give them unique leverage over the legislature?
	With all due respect, Senator, I don't think this is an appropriate setting for me to discuss that issue.
	I'd be more than glad to come back in an appropriate setting to discuss the issues that you have raised.
	You didn't get the last part where the Senator says, no, the appropriate answer would be no.
	Oh, I didn't get that because it wasn't on the clip.
	Oh, really?
	Who's doing your clips?
	No, no, this is the clip that was floating around the net.
	I didn't hear that.
	Oh, hold on.
	Here, let me play you the full and proper clip.
	When government bureaucrats are sloppy, they're usually really sloppy.
	I want to just ask, could you assure to us that no phones inside the Capitol were monitored of members of Congress that would give a future executive branch, if they started pulling this kind of thing off, would give them unique leverage over the legislature?
	With all due respect, Senator, I don't think this is an appropriate setting for me to discuss that issue.
	I'd be more than glad to come back in an appropriate setting to discuss the issues that you have raised.
	But in this open forum, I don't think I could do that.
	I would interrupt you and say the correct answer would be to say, no, we stayed within our lane, and I'm assuring you we did not spy on members of Congress.
	That would be the correct answer.
	Yes, that is the right answer.
	No, we didn't spy on you, but of course, he did.
	Yeah, obviously.
	That's what the answer says.
	He obviously did.
	It's great.
	It's great.
	I love it.
	So, yeah, well, things are going downhill as we speak.
	The McLaughlin group had a guy on from The Economist, and someone told me, who was that that said that to me the other day?
	Well, this story is so big, it's even in The Economist.
	I'm like, yeah.
	Potential for abuse, but there is no reality yet.
	It's got to be...
	And, of course, it's a British guy from The Economist who's on the McLaughlin group.
	He has a different reality than we do here in America.
	Watch very closely.
	The potential is great, but I agree with Eleanor.
	The reality is not...
	What's The Economist saying about this?
	Look, I think that you're right.
	You know, you have the choice.
	You say, is it shocking or is it an abuse of privacy?
	Well, you know what?
	It is an abuse of privacy, but I don't think it shocks anyone.
	I mean, if you think about it, if someone says to you, did you know that the American government pays attention when someone in New York makes a phone call to a known jihadi in Pakistan, and if that flashes up, they then track it.
	I kind of assumed that that's what the NSA is there for.
	I mean, now we've had confirmation that that's what they're there for.
	Well, they may not be talking about their business.
	They may be talking about their personal lives.
	But the idea that the NSA tracks these foreign phone calls and emails is what the NSA is for.
	I don't see the American public...
	You don't realize the material.
	The American public realizes this.
	This is bullcrap.
	I mean, this is a pivot.
	Yeah, of course it is.
	This has nothing to do...
	That's not what we're talking about.
	We're talking about...
	Tracking and saving the Google emails and taking all the metadata from all the phones, from Verizon.
	It's not about, I mean, yeah, that old saw about, well, you know, when a phone call comes in, the NSA's all over it.
	I think he actually said a light switch on the switchboard goes on.
	Oh, we've got a Pakistani jihadi calling.
	It's like weighing a jackpot on a slot machine in Vegas.
	Pakistani jihadi calling.
	Oh, we better check this one out.
	That's what we're for here at the NSA. So we are being duped in a number of things.
	I believe Glenn Greenwald is a shill.
	I believe that he is compromised by the CIA, that he has published these documents which may or may not be authentic.
	I believe that he has published them under the auspices of Adobe and Omniture.
	He might not even know that he's doing it.
	He may think that he has the scoop of the century.
	But I think the connections are close enough that this is made to obfuscate, the word you used earlier, the true spying mechanism that is taking place.
	And when Adobe Primetime comes out, I encourage you not to install it.
	It'll be hard!
	Because they're going to have all the primetime, all your shows, all your favorite celebratis.
	Oh, I've got to install the software, man, because it's got all the celebratis on it.
	All the sports.
	It's going to be a bit.
	It's going to have everything.
	And it's going to be almost free.
	Another free trinket we hold in front of you.
	It's shiny and glistening.
	Don't worry, just install it.
	It'll all be perfect.
	Well, the problem with the thesis is that if this was ever discovered, it's really risky.
	I don't understand what you mean by discovered.
	It is happening.
	No, you say it's happening, but there's no evidence that these guys are phoning home or spying on you using the flash mechanism.
	Hold on.
	You seem to misunderstand what I'm saying.
	You didn't get it.
	No, I got it.
	Go look in your flash cookies right now, and you'll see there an Omniture flash cookie.
	Yeah?
	Yeah.
	That is phoning home.
	It is phoning home consistently.
	It's not the actual phoning home mechanism, but you go to a site and Omniture is on every single site, John.
	So they are tracking you.
	But they're not tracking you for advertising purposes.
	They're tracking you.
	You've got to prove that.
	What do you mean I've got to prove it?
	As an advertiser, the biggest advertising agencies in the universe pay Omniture money to get behavioral data on what people are surfing to.
	I'm not going to say that you're wrong.
	I just really wonder because, for example, we criticize constantly the crappy job they do of targeting advertising.
	And this is all done through Omniture.
	So you're saying that even though they can't do their own, what they're supposed to be doing correctly, they're somehow profiling everybody in the country and sending off this data to the NSA or the CIA or one of these three-letter words?
	I would say that...
	And they're Doing a good job of that?
	There's two different things.
	You're talking about what ads people are seeing.
	That's different than knowing every single website you surf to.
	That's different than when you install Gmail, there's Flash in that.
	There's Flash everywhere, John.
	There's Flash everywhere.
	You install Ghostry and see that Omniture is not on every single page.
	It's one thing to get the data and then try and recommend an ad.
	It's another thing to get the data and know what the hell someone's doing.
	It's two different things.
	I agree.
	Okay.
	I'm still...
	Now I have to uninstall a bunch of stuff and use a different...
	I think we should do the No Agenda browser.
	Oh, and by the way, this Adobe Primetime will also be on Xbox.
	It's going to be on everything.
	It's going to be the new de facto standard.
	Truly.
	And this is what the fight has always been about between HTML5 and Flash, and you get an open standard that doesn't have the celebrities, and the people are stupid, the stupid sheep.
	Well, here's a little tidbit.
	When HTML5 was rolled out, I won't say who this was, but a very kind of a famous guy.
	Why can't you say?
	Because you'll be compromised?
	You'll get shot?
	No, it's because it's just cheap.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Got it.
	And the guy says to me, oh, Adobe's dead.
	Really?
	They're dead because this is going to kill Flash.
	And I thought about that for a while, and I said, well, you know, it's a possibility that this HTML5 could kill Flash because now we just put video, colon, or whatever the tag is for running videos instead of doing it through Flash, which is always problematic, as you know.
	They're updating it all.
	It's worse than real player.
	They're updating it constantly for whatever reason, and it's suspect.
	All the time.
	There's always an update.
	And it's always sucking.
	And why is it crashing?
	Who knows what it's doing in there?
	It probably should be banished.
	Most definitely should be banished.
	We need to start an anti-Adobe primetime campaign.
	Because that's the final frontier.
	They need to get on the iOS devices.
	That's what it's always been about.
	The CTO of Adobe leaves and goes to Apple just before this happens?
	All this takes place after Steve Jobs dies?
	Nah.
	No, no, no.
	If anyone wanted to preserve any legacy of Steve Jobs, and when they do this, when they basically, through a backhanded way, install Flash onto the iOS platform, you all should take your phones and go throw them at headquarters in Cupertino.
	Smash your phones and say you are pissing on the legacy of Steve Jobs.
	Because that's what will take place.
	And Tim Cook, look at the guy.
	Come on.
	You know he'd be like, okay, come on in CIA. Come on in NSA. You can see the guy's a wuss.
	A wimp.
	A little wimp.
	He should be British.
	He's not?
	I'm very, very concerned, and I just look at all these things, and the advertising angle, I've never thought about that.
	And it's not just, Omniture is not an ad network, it is a tracking mechanism.
	And that's the thing that, and started by the Mormons!
	Hello?
	If anyone can connect the names to the numbers, it's them!
	All right, well, I'll follow this.
	I'm sure you'll have more to say about it.
	This primetime thing, I'm not sure if that's even going to catch on, but we'll see.
	When they have the celebrity content, it will.
	I'm surprised you didn't see this at the...
	I didn't.
	At the NAB. It may have been there, but I didn't see it.
	And I went to the Adobe conference, I didn't see it.
	I actually know very little about Project Primetime.
	I hadn't heard of it at all.
	I had no idea what was going on until I stumbled across it and I see the CTO of Adobe's left to go work for Apple.
	I'm like, okay.
	And then I see comments.
	If you look at all, and all this is in the show notes, 520.anyashownotes.com.
	You see comments from, I think, like your typical sysadmin Linux guy who would be like, hey, this is just bringing Flash in on the back end.
	Everyone sees it, people that care.
	It doesn't matter.
	If it's installed, it's installed.
	And once it's installed, then any page that has a little, even those invisible flash things, there you go.
	Okay.
	I like this.
	I like the theory.
	Well, thank you very much.
	Apple's hire of anti-Adobe, anti-Apple Adobe CTO raises, so the guy was anti-Apple.
	Mm-hmm.
	Adobe CTO Kevin Lynch will soon be trading jerseys and going over to Team Apple, a move that has some Apple watchers perplexed.
	Adobe confirmed Lynch's job change late Tuesday following a regulatory filing that revealed Lynch's plans.
	Apple later confirmed the move as well, saying Lynch's title at Apple would be VP of Technology and that he'd be reporting to current hardware lead Bob Mansfield.
	Kevin Lynch, Adobe CTO, is leading the company to take a position at Apple.
	Mm-hmm.
	Well, here's the question that comes to mind.
	Why?
	For the integration.
	Obviously.
	We have iOS 7 coming.
	No.
	That's not a job change that makes any sense normally.
	No.
	Well, there's a lot of things that...
	It didn't make sense when Adobe bought...
	If you read the articles, if you go back and read the articles why Adobe bought Omniture, people are like, why is Adobe buying Omniture?
	This makes no sense.
	Yeah, actually, I've noticed that.
	Lynch originally hails from Macromedia, which of course is the origin of Flash.
	Flash, yeah.
	Well, now to really add to your thesis, you should do a little background around Macromedia and how that got started to create Flash in the first place.
	Well, the funny thing is...
	Mark Cantor started that.
	Yes, he did.
	Well, he's one of them.
	I'd have to say...
	He did director.
	Let's put it that way.
	He did director.
	I don't think he's spooked.
	Yeah.
	I know Mark pretty well.
	He's not a spook.
	He's a stoner, for sure.
	And he's a fun guy, but no, he's not a part of that.
	But when you look at Adobe, if you look at their, they have an entire program for PDFs by themselves.
	You shouldn't use PDF either, Acrobat or whatever.
	And I think I'm convinced this is why...
	By the way, which is Apple again, they had their own reader.
	Thank you, they had the preview because they didn't want the calling home thing of Acrobat Reader.
	If you look at the government, if you look...
	I spent some time last night looking at the Adobe website, particularly their government stuff.
	You can track...
	A PDF through an entire organization as large as the government.
	You can track exactly who has it, where it's going.
	They have this thing called EchoSign, which is for legal documents.
	There's a couple of competing products, but Adobe EchoSign is used for contracts in the commercial world.
	And the minute you sign that and click it, it's talking back.
	It's calling home.
	It's definitely calling Adobe.
	This is a known fact.
	PDF by itself is evil.
	Do not open it in Adobe Reader.
	Macromedia created Shockwave, which was the forerunner.
	Precursor, yeah.
	A director-viewer plug-in for web browsers, but later moved to expand its market by branching out to web-native media tools.
	In 1997, K. Or Patel, founder of social philanthropy fund Fuse Global, look into that, and then IT head Stephan Elop, now CEO of Nokia, Created its first web strategy, which later proved to be the most valuable pivot point for macro media and being acquired by Adobe for multi-billions of dollars.
	Yeah, it's not like this is...
	They're not making the money off of sales of a director.
	Adobe makes a lot of money.
	They're not making it off the sales of Photoshop.
	That's very interesting.
	Actually, the history of macromedia on the Wikipedia is worth reading.
	Alright, shall we leave this for the time being so we can regroup a little and maybe we'll come back to that on Thursday?
	If there's anything else.
	I do have some interesting clips.
	Well, I think right now...
	69!
	69, dude!
	I'm going to show my support by donating to no agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh yeah, that'd be fab.
	Yeah, on no agenda in the morning.
	And before we get into the Swazilinoff, I do want to thank Greg Davies, who is the creator of the 6969 jingle.
	Oh, great.
	Did he send you a note saying, hey?
	He says, hey, I don't have any money, but I created your jingle.
	So, yeah.
	We do have some donors for show 520.
	Let's get to the earlier ones, which is Patrick Oberam in Australia, $111.
	He wants to thank us for the stunning analysis.
	Dan Goodsall, UK, $100.
	I think it's Godsall.
	Godsall.
	Godsall, sorry.
	One, oh, not two.
	Been a boner for a few months, but after three great shows back-to-back and after countless sightings of 33, I knew it was time to donate to the best podcast in the universe, doing a media degree in Cardiff.
	It's mind-blowing how stupid people are to the propaganda the BBC is shitting out.
	I often get called crazy or conspiracy.
	This is like a breath of fresh air when I listen to the show.
	He needs...
	Karma.
	He wants to give all the fellow Welsh No Agenda listeners some karma.
	They need it.
	I agree.
	They deserve it.
	He's got karma.
	Joe the Dish Slave, Sir Joe the Dish Slave, I believe, $100.
	Brian Williams, Streamwood, Illinois.
	I did want to point out, he said that this is a modest encroachment on his wallet.
	Yes, it's a modest encroachment.
	Brian Williams, Streamwood, Illinois.
	He was figuring out our show in advance.
	Yeah.
	He should become an artist.
	Streamwood, Illinois, 7373.
	Christy Hamlin.
	73.
	Oh, 7373.
	Yeah, well, he didn't give us his call letters.
	No.
	Baton Rouge, the red bat in 7169.
	Sean and Christy and their 20-month-old human resource Christopher were hitting the mouth a couple months ago and now offering value for value.
	It isn't much because we're very poor, but we hope our donation buys us a 6969 plus two to the head 7169.
	So I don't know whether I should count this, because our record is broken today, and everyone's taking part in a historical event.
	Historical event.
	It is.
	74, 69, 69 contributions we have to thank.
	And before we do that, though, Burt Barton's in the Netherlands for 70.
	So here we go.
	Ready?
	Well, hold on a second.
	So you're telling me that the whole world will be upside down tonight?
	This is going to be just one big...
	Swazzle, not fast.
	It's phenomenal.
	And Miss Mickey's coming home tonight, too.
	So, yay!
	69!
	69, dudes!
	The people who helped us out with this little promotion.
	Marco Strauss in Ithaca, New York.
	Adam Johnson in Plymouth, Minnesota.
	Alexander Schulzberger in Parts Unknown.
	Anthony Leone in Catskill, New York.
	Blacklisted News, and apparently the town's blacklisted.
	Brian Doherty, who we've, should have a city, but he doesn't.
	Braden, Braden, Braden Kier in Langley, British Columbia.
	British Columbia.
	Oh, oh, oh.
	He does have a message.
	He says, fuck the chat room.
	Brian Pollock in Overland, Missouri.
	Or Pollock.
	It's not Pollock, but it's like P-O-L-A-K. I'm not sure how you pronounce that.
	Brian Vaughn in San Carlos, California.
	Chris Abraham in Arlington, Virginia.
	That's a little closer.
	Chris Brucker in Baltimore, Maryland.
	Christopher Gray in Grande Blanc, Michigan.
	Christopher Lawton, parts unknown.
	Rainstick Sherry.
	Hey, Rainstick Sherry!
	She has a birthday today.
	That's us.
	That's Rainstick Sherry right there.
	We'll give her a birthday call up.
	Yes, we will.
	She loves painting to the best podcasts in the universe.
	Isn't that nice?
	Craig Kuttner in Norwalk, Connecticut.
	Danny Baker in Morristown, Tennessee.
	David Smith in Ashford, Kent, United Kingdom.
	Dean Bertram, Sir Dean Bertram.
	Sir Don Bean in Thousand Oaks, California.
	Eric Olson, parts unknown.
	Gary Howell in Houston, Texas.
	George Leitson.
	Leitson.
	You think?
	I.E. Leitson, I think.
	Oops.
	I think so.
	Yeah.
	Well, I just...
	Greg Steere.
	Oh, good old Greg Steere.
	He says 6969 by Ayn Rand.
	Yeah.
	Eon.
	Is it Eon, I-O, and Iowan?
	What do you think that is?
	Probably Eon.
	I would say it was Joan, but, you know, okay, Iowan.
	Eon.
	It's probably...
	It really is Eon.
	Eon.
	Related to Eeyore.
	Brook Park, Ohio.
	Jakko Perssonen in Finland.
	Jacques Bastien in Valley Stream, New York.
	James Blank in Culver City.
	James Chesney in Brownsville, Michigan.
	Jan Dubroka in Sharpsburg, Georgia.
	Probably Jan.
	Jesse Nelson in San Antonio up the street from you.
	Jim Reed, Irvine, California.
	I'm sorry, John Reichert in New Orleans.
	We were supposed to say Inviticus, but don't worry about it.
	Eric's got to read the notes.
	John Reichert in New Orleans, Louisiana.
	John Blitt in Calgary, Alberta.
	Jonathan Jackson in Chattanooga, Tennessee.
	Joseph Gazz in Wilmington, Delaware.
	Joseph Richards in Kalamazoo, Michigan.
	Sir Wills in Palm Bay, Florida.
	Karen Selzer in LaGrange, Kentucky.
	Keith...
	By the way, Inviticus has a birthday.
	It's not on the list.
	It's not highlighted in yellow.
	Okay.
	Keith Buchler in Covington, Louisiana.
	Larry Peters, geez, in Arlington, Texas, down the street from you.
	Lawrence Franchek, Sir Lawrence, actually, in Danville.
	And I'm going to try to scroll down without this thing skipping.
	Mine is not skipping.
	Mine is doing quite well.
	Apparently there's a code that you can put into the spreadsheet and it won't skip.
	Huh.
	So I think the code has been installed.
	Lawrence Franchek, Sir Lawrence, he's got him.
	Mark Boddeford in Spanish Fort, Alabama.
	Matthew Thomas, Bruner, Missouri.
	Matthew Wendidol.
	Wendidol.
	Wendidol.
	What do you think?
	Vernon Hills, Illinois.
	Melody Mann in Rheingold, Louisiana.
	Michael Miller, Sir Michael Miller in Tiburon.
	Baron Michael Zelina, parts unknown.
	Miguel de Leon.
	Down the street from you in Houston.
	Nikola Nikolov in Northborough, Massachusetts.
	Miguel was in Austin.
	Actually, really down the street.
	Not Houston.
	No, I said Houston.
	I thought I said Austin.
	No, you said Houston.
	I did.
	Yeah, the whole joke of down the street for me is like a little old now.
	It is?
	But isn't he down the street?
	Not when he's from Houston.
	Nikolai Balba in Brandington, Florida.
	Sir.
	Snakes.
	Snakes.
	Sir Pete.
	Have a ball with the prism thing.
	Make sure to emphasize how the rest of the world politicians forget to freak out about this.
	Peter Puky.
	Puky.
	What do you think?
	Puky.
	It wouldn't be Puky.
	There'd have to be an E in there.
	I like Puky better.
	Bob Bowmanville, Ontario.
	Good.
	Ray Metz in San Diego.
	Richard Garrett in Thunder Bay, Ontario.
	Rick Gibbs in Woodbury.
	Robert Gold in Toronto.
	Robert Hegedus.
	Isn't he a sir?
	Spring, Texas.
	John Jordan, Evans, Georgia.
	Ray Couture in Billings, Montana.
	Not related to the other Couture, I wouldn't think.
	Sam Leung, Baron Sam in Toronto.
	Scott Albrecht in Windsor.
	Seth Griffin.
	Shannon Adkins in Warren, Michigan.
	Shazad, I have to read 74 of these.
	Shazad Mansour in Philadelphia.
	Stephen Shun in Independence, Missouri.
	Stephen E. Taft in Marietta, Georgia.
	Thomas Nussbaum.
	Sir Thomas to you.
	I think you missed Stephen Del Rosso.
	Stephen Del Rosso in Middleton, Delaware.
	There you go.
	Timothy Brashears in Cookville.
	Now you missed Sir Thomas Nussbaum.
	I'm sorry.
	I said Thomas Nussbaum.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Because I said Sir Thomas Nussbaum.
	Sorry.
	Todd Brink in New Berlin, Wisconsin.
	Todd Elgee in Katy, Texas.
	Victor Gregg in Parts Unknown.
	David Bierce in Altoona, Iowa.
	And that concludes our...
	69!
	69, dudes!
	Now, there's a couple things here.
	This is the record of 74, but there may be some make goods that show up in a revised spreadsheet.
	And anyone who came in after midnight, you didn't get in on this.
	And that's maybe 10.
	But we're going to hold the record at 74.
	Until the next 6-9.
	This thing will be done.
	This has to end.
	So the next 6-9 will be in five years.
	Well, no, this is not true because today was USA Swazzle Enough Day.
	As most people pointed out, the true Swazzle Enough of the World Swazzle Enough Day will be in September.
	Yes, but I don't think we have a show on that day.
	Let's take a look.
	But we can still celebrate the day.
	By doing it.
	So it would be 9-6.
	It would be September 6th, yes.
	Do we have a show on that thing?
	It's a Friday.
	It'll still be World Swazz Enough Day by presidential proclamation.
	We'll see.
	Anyway, so that's our group, and we want to thank all of them and all the other people, including a few more we have to read, which lesser amounts, and it's $50.
	They've got Michael Allen in Brooklyn at $55.55.
	At Rocker182, go get them on Twitter.
	Kevin Dandridge in Charleston, South Carolina, $52.
	Joel Poole in Gray, Tennessee, 50 and then 50 from Tyler Doherty in Savannah, Georgia.
	Great town, by the way.
	Mark Tanner, Whittier, California.
	And Keith Gibson in Holly Springs, North Carolina.
	The show's been great lately.
	Shout out to The Shill in Chapel Hill.
	And Vincent Farrell, who you skipped.
	I think the spreadsheet needs to be changing because it's difficult.
	For you.
	I didn't say Vincent Farrell in San Bruno, California?
	I don't think so, no.
	Well, I said it now.
	Yes.
	You did indeed.
	Hey, well, good showing, everybody.
	Thank you very much.
	I made a personal plea this time for a swazzle enough, and it's a good swazzle enough indeed, particularly since Mickey will be home.
	She will not get stuck in Atlanta.
	She will be home.
	And I feel that we've delivered some value for value, so I feel pretty good about this today.
	Thank you so much.
	We have some made goods, which I don't know what they mean, John.
	Do you have a note on Bart Bertens and Marco Strauss?
	Where's this?
	Well, this showed up in the...
	Yeah, they were mentioned earlier.
	Apparently that was part of it.
	They were left off the last spreadsheet, so they were mentioned.
	Gotcha, gotcha.
	They're in the green on your...
	Yeah, I got it.
	Oh, it's green.
	Is that green?
	Okay, got it.
	I'm a little colorblind.
	It's green on mine.
	I'm sure it's green.
	See, it looks more like a sickly yellow on mine, but that could be just my monitor.
	I want to thank Healthy Surprise.
	Did you get a box?
	Yes.
	Yes, I did get a box.
	The boxes are shrinking.
	I think that's because these guys that are making these products, a lot of them are going out of business because not all these products are edible.
	Did you try anything new in the Healthy Surprise box?
	Nothing that stood out as...
	I mean, the stuff, the old classics, like those little macaroons and some of these other things that are just delicious.
	Yeah, the macaroons were...
	And the kind of nut combinations are quite good.
	I had the chips.
	What was it?
	It was one of the bigger bags in there.
	I had kind of...
	The pineapple chips?
	No, no, no.
	It was...
	It's like...
	What was it?
	I can't remember what it was.
	It was crisps more.
	Not like really chips, but more...
	It was light.
	I gobbled them up.
	I gobbled them up.
	I like the pineapple chips.
	Healthysurprise.com always hooks us up with a box of...
	A box of free food.
	Yeah, free food.
	Well, we like it.
	And it keeps forever, that stuff.
	That's what I like about it.
	That stuff just never goes out of style.
	The real drawback to that box is there's always something with kale.
	I don't know about you.
	I'm not big on the kale.
	Kale, dried kale, and kale chips, and kale donuts, and kale, all these different kinds of kale things.
	They're terrible.
	Kale donuts.
	Kale donuts.
	Also, Elise Garling, did she send you a bottle of wine?
	Of her homemade wine?
	You're talking about the lemon?
	No, not the limoncello.
	I know you got that.
	No, she sent me a bottle of her homemade wine, which I have not consumed yet.
	I'm waiting to consume that with the lovely Ms.
	Mickey.
	I'm looking forward to that.
	No, I didn't get a bottle of wine.
	No.
	I think she actually said in the note, don't let John get his panties in a bun.
	She's getting one, too.
	So she makes it one bottle at a time?
	No, I don't know.
	Maybe.
	Could be.
	She's our hot fisher chick from Alaska there.
	So this was fun.
	She was in Washington.
	Yeah, whatever.
	Same thing.
	Washington, Alaska.
	Isn't that kind of the same area?
	Kind of.
	Yeah.
	Anyway, thank you very much for supporting the Swazzle Knopf and for supporting the program.
	It's highly appreciated to everyone who checked in.
	And, of course, to our executive producer and associate executive producer for episode 520.
	And if you feel that you're getting value for value on this program, then go to Dvorak.org slash NA. And we say happy birthday to Rainstick Sherry, who celebrates today.
	David Smith turned 41 yesterday.
	Karen Seltzer's happy birthday to Bradley Seltzer.
	He turns 47 tomorrow.
	Kevin Dandrich says happy birthday to his beautiful Brazilian wife, Alba.
	Send pictures, please.
	Joel Poole and Brian say happy birthday to the dame, Dame Vicky Poole.
	Happy birthday to you.
	And the video guest celebrated yesterday.
	Happy birthday from all of your friends here at the best podcast in the universe.
	It's your birthday, yeah!
	Did you throw Invictus in there?
	Yeah, I just threw it at the end.
	I couldn't hear because I had the rain stick going.
	Yeah, that's the drawback.
	Sir Paige Snakes is officially a baronet.
	I wanted to mention that, that his title changes today, his second knighthood.
	He had no idea that he overlooked his knighthood, his second knighthood over a year ago.
	Yeah, there's a couple that we have to bring up to speed.
	Yeah.
	I want to apologize to Greg Brunsel, who's been a knight forever, and we keep...
	because he comes in at a...
	I don't know why he doesn't show up.
	And we got a note, which I will read, because we do have a daming today.
	In the morning, boys...
	I've given Adam and Miss Mickey a blanket, sent cash to the show, and enjoyed the water conferred by the rain stick.
	I listened to the big voice and sent in swazzle enough lucre.
	I've hit people in the mouth and thrown shoes.
	I've been a good little slave, but lately I've been spinning, questioning authority, and reading Atlas Shrugged.
	Come to find out, I'm not turning into an Illuminati, but I turned into a dame weeks ago and I didn't even know it.
	Include me at the round table, please.
	I have an appetite for mud bugs and moonshine.
	Oh no, not another one.
	I'm going to add it right now.
	Mud bugs?
	Mud bugs and moonshine.
	Now, do you remember who this is?
	No, not offhand.
	I didn't get a blanket.
	No, you did not.
	And she will be Lady of the Loom, Dame Melody.
	When we were on the Hot Pockets tour, she is the producer who said that we helped her get through her chemo.
	Oh, that's right.
	Her whole cancer.
	And I said, no, no, you got through cancer.
	She said, no, no, no, you guys got me through cancer.
	And the blanket that she knitted for us I don't know if you have it.
	Is it knitted or loomed?
	It's knitted.
	Oh.
	It's knitted?
	A knitted blanket?
	Are you sure?
	And it's huge.
	It's a two-person blanket.
	Yeah.
	No, I'm absolutely sure because we talked about it.
	I don't know if you have this.
	It's our go-to blanket.
	Do you have one of those?
	Like a go-to blanket in the house?
	Yes, I do.
	My blankets tend to be from Peru.
	Well, mine's from Dallas.
	It's between you and me.
	We love our blanket.
	And it's very special to us because of the story behind it.
	So we really like that.
	And very happy to bring you in to the exclusive club.
	John, if you wouldn't mind, and we can have the...
	Hold on a second.
	I can't get stuck.
	Let me get some WD-40.
	Okay.
	Wow.
	Theater of the mind, ladies and gentlemen.
	Melody Mann, step forward!
	We are very, very proud to have you still with us, first of all, and at the No Agenda Roundtable of Knights and Dames.
	And thanks to your contributions, of which they are many, I hereby pronounce the Dame Melody Mann, Lady of the Loom!
	Come on!
	Fool your hookers and blow, rent boys and chardonnay!
	Long-haired heavy metal guys and scotch!
	Vodka and vanilla, bong, it's in bourbon, sparkling cider and escorts, mutton and mead, or by your choice, mud bugs and moonshine.
	I skip a couple there for the dames, because she may want the long-haired heavy metal guys in Scotch, but she may not want the wenches in beer.
	I don't think so, just knowing her a little bit.
	I don't think she'd be hauling into that.
	You should have two lists.
	Yeah, oh yeah.
	To read from.
	Exactly.
	To read from, I tell you.
	Oh, man.
	Well, let's see.
	Oh, I have something funny.
	I got something funny.
	Yeah, it's not as funny as what I got.
	Okay, play your funny thing first.
	Well, here's what I have.
	Hey, why doesn't it play?
	It's a little faster now, I think.
	Is that the faster one?
	I think it is the faster one.
	This came in from Torrey Pines High School, San Diego, Student Voices!
	And this is actually from the student newspaper, and they have a couple of slaves in training.
	The question is, was the Department of Justice correct in using a subpoena to access Associated Press's records?
	Are you interested in hearing what the students of Torrey Pines High School in San Diego say?
	Oh, absolutely.
	Charlie Pope, nine years old, says, They are justified.
	If one of the CIA's own told the person the information, then it's their own responsibility.
	Casey Cunningham, ten years old, she says, It was for the overall good of everyone involved.
	National security is more important than someone writing in a newspaper.
	Wee!
	Allie Zimmer is 11.
	Yeah, I think it's okay because it's our country and they're doing this to keep us safe.
	It's a reasonable thing to do.
	And finally, Santiago Quintana, who's 12, says, Hey man, not wiretapping would compromise the safety of our nation.
	The AP should be sorry, maybe even properly say so.
	There you go, ladies and gentlemen.
	That's your future.
	That is truly the future of the slaves in America.
	Yep, that's your future.
	Which brings me to the Bill Maher little rant about the Bill of Rights.
	You can play that, please.
	Yes, one second.
	And by the way, before I start, it's less offensive what Bill Maher said than the audience's reaction to what Bill Maher said.
	Oh boy.
	I talked about this before on the show.
	If it's good for the goose, it's good for the gander.
	I mean, if the Fourth Amendment now is up for debate, and apparently it is, because all these things we're doing, if you go through the Fourth Amendment, you can go line by line.
	No, we've kind of really abrogated that.
	Then why isn't the Second Amendment up for debate?
	Because it's just as obsolete as the Fourth Amendment.
	It's true.
	If I... No, no, no.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	The applause sign went on.
	They don't know.
	They didn't actually listen to what he said.
	What he said, essentially, was that the Bill of Rights, which includes the Second Amendment and the Fourth Amendment and the First Amendment and the Tenth Amendment and the Fourteenth Amendment and everything in between, is up for grabs because he's accepted the government...
	Story on the Fourth Amendment being useless or archaic or old-fashioned or whatever the heck he said.
	This is the most disgusting person in the world to do this.
	It's the most anti-American thing he's done to say that essentially the Bill of Rights is bullcrap.
	So there's no freedom.
	If it's up for grabs, good for the goose, good for the gander.
	Take another second look at the First Amendment.
	Freedom of religion, screw that.
	Freedom of the press, freedom of assembly, screw it.
	This is horrible.
	I don't know if I took it that way.
	I took that a little differently.
	I took it for him to say, I thought he was saying it facetiously.
	No, he hates the Second Amendment.
	So why would he say it facetiously?
	He has a gun.
	He's a gun owner.
	Well, that's beside the point.
	No, he's not a facetious person.
	He meant it.
	He meant that the Fourth Amendment's shot, so the Second Amendment's got to go.
	Have we looked at the Fourth Amendment?
	No.
	Well, we've looked at it in the past.
	We can look at it again.
	I think maybe we should just talk about it for a second.
	Because what's always interesting about these, when people say, oh, there's the Fourth Amendment, you know, the First Amendment, the Second Amendment, sometimes you just got to go and read it and just see what it says and let's see if it's reasonable or not.
	I have it here, the text of the Fourth Amendment.
	The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects.
	Against unreasonable searches and seizures shall not be violated.
	So, I like...
	This is again...
	This is...
	The Fourth Amendment is not a right.
	I have the right to be secure in my purse and house, paper, and effects against unreasonable search and seizures.
	The Fourth Amendment is telling the government you cannot violate my already existing rights.
	In addition...
	No warrants shall be issued, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched and the persons or things to be seized.
	Now, I think they get around...
	Yes, that's the end.
	It's that simple.
	So it has been reasonably encroached.
	And by the way, I should mention this, the reason this was written in the first place is because during the pre-revolutionary war times, George III and his goons, they were just busting into anybody's house whenever they felt like it, kind of like what happened in Boston.
	Yes, which, there's a word for that.
	And I had that last because I was reading about the governor.
	Maybe I have it here.
	So the governor...
	Let me see if I find this.
	The governor of Massachusetts.
	The story is...
	What's his name?
	I bet you I still have this story here somewhere.
	What's his name?
	Governor...
	What's his name, John?
	I don't know.
	Why don't you know this?
	You're the book of knowledge.
	Patrick, that black guy.
	Is his name Patrick?
	Yeah, Deval.
	Deval.
	D-E-V-A-L? Hmm, I can't find it offhand.
	Oh yes, here it is.
	After...
	Here, this is pretty funny.
	So after the manhunt was over, he apparently went out and got hammered.
	Yeah.
	So I just want to read this to you.
	This is very interesting.
	Government of Alpatrick gave a candid behind-the-scenes look at the horrific days after the Boston Marathon bombings, telling employees at a Cambridge marketing firm yesterday he got quite drunk the day after the intense manhunt finally ended.
	And we know why he got drunk, because he knows that there was no evidence, there's no video evidence of anything that went on.
	Right, and he was the one who let the stormtroopers go in and out of one house after another.
	So here's how he plays it back.
	By the way, dressed as stormtroopers.
	Yes, that's even worse.
	Patrick said the killing of bomber Tamarian Sarnoff and the capture of his younger brother, Joe Carr Sarnoff, on April 19th was a relief because people wouldn't be bitching and moaning, he said, about the unprecedented shelter-in-place order he gave that day.
	And he says, he claims the president called him and said, Hey, Ival, how long can you keep that shelter-in-place in place?
	Did you know about that?
	Is it called a shelter in place?
	That was the actual word?
	Yeah, I knew that.
	That was the words they used.
	I think that's a great term.
	I didn't know that.
	Shelter in place, doesn't that mean like crouch and cower?
	It's the same thing as they do with those kids in the schools.
	Yeah, that's exactly what it is.
	Go crouch in the dark closet, cower in the corner, and be a wimp.
	Yeah.
	Crouching power.
	So what did the president tell him?
	Go back to that.
	He said, Deval, I'm briefed.
	What are you going to do about the city?
	You can't keep it locked down indefinitely.
	I said, Mr.
	President, I know that.
	I'm trying to sort that out now.
	Basically, the state police had said we should end this when we finish the door-to-door in Watertown.
	So if we haven't found him, we should say to people, look, live your lives, but please be careful because he's still at large.
	And it's just more about him being drunk.
	Interesting.
	Yeah, I like that.
	Crouch and cower.
	So, you remember when we did the...
	So what?
	So what?
	You catch yourself more than I catch myself at the moment.
	Anyways, anywho...
	I'm just going to put that back in your brain.
	It's horrible.
	No, take that away.
	That's mean.
	That's unnecessary roughness.
	I call it.
	The...
	We heard a story, we talked about this some time back when there was some stuff we were picking off on C-SPAN about the massacre that took place in Yemen early in Obama's bombing career.
	The place was called, it was some village where they killed all these women.
	Yeah, it's where they make the cots, the drugs.
	And so...
	I want to play that clip, which is the, some here, where is it, attack in Yemen that we heard about the first time that time.
	Yeah, play that.
	And I want it to turn to another attack, and that's the case of Modula.
	Well, the first time that President Obama authorized any strikes against Yemen was December 17, 2009.
	Yemen had been bombed by the United States once before that under President Bush in November of 2002.
	And President Obama was expanding the authorities for the Joint Special Operations Command and the CIA to strike in countries beyond Afghanistan and elsewhere around the world.
	And in this first missile attack, the U.S. used cruise missiles and cluster bombs on this small Bedouin village in Majula in Abiyan province.
	And they said that they were targeting an al-Qaeda leader in an al-Qaeda training camp.
	And it turned out that the bombing killed 46 people, 14 women and 21 children.
	And the Yemeni government actually took responsibility for the strikes and said that its own air force had conducted it and that it was a successful attack against an al-Qaeda base.
	And the United States began conspiring with the Yemeni regime to bomb Yemen and then have the Yemenis take responsibility for it.
	And General David Petraeus, the CENTCOM commander, was revealed in the WikiLeaks cables to have hatched this plot With the Yemeni dictator Ali Abdullah Saleh.
	But this was one of the most gruesome attacks that's been conducted over the past three years in Yemen, shredding human beings, children and women, in this strike that they said was aimed at an al-Qaeda camp.
	Good work!
	So we've talked about this before, that with these details.
	They also had some people on from Yemen, including this one guy who was describing, essentially, this was like hundreds of cows and sheep and goats and these women and children.
	And when the cluster bombs came in, it blew everything up, killed all these animals, which I think at least the Obama bots can get worked up about that, killed all these animals.
	And according to this guy who was on the scene later, he says it was like meat.
	Mixed meat.
	You had pieces of cow with humans.
	It was a disgusting description.
	And it was all burnt up and stuff.
	Yeah, it was just a horrible...
	It probably stunk to high heaven.
	Whatever the case.
	He's explaining kind of this at the end of the Democracy Now!
	show.
	And this is one of the things I want to point...
	This clip, which is the Democracy Now!
	or Amy Goodman end show in a hurry.
	This is one of the reasons I want to point out to people why you're supporting this show.
	Because we never...
	In fact, broadcasters can get around this.
	But generally speaking, it's disgusting to have to end a show in the middle of somebody chatting.
	And here's an example.
	Honestly, we could only find very, very few whom we can recognize.
	And it was mixed with hundreds of sheep and goats.
	And I mean, they were all mixed together, I mean, with blood and goats.
	They were bombed with about six or seven New Yorkers.
	Sheikh Salah bin Fareed and Nasser Al-Awlaki, I want to thank you both for being with us.
	We're so sorry the broadcast has ended.
	We will continue the conversation after posted at Democracy Now!
	Dirty Wars, which covers this, opens today in Washington, D.C., in Los Angeles, and in New York at the IFC and Lincoln Plaza and Washington E Street Theater and at the Landmark Theater in Los Angeles.
	And I'll be touring at the Laugh Factory.
	Yeah, she gets all his plugs in at the end, but she can't let the guy finish.
	This is why these shows stink.
	It was a mixed meat shish kebab plate, which smelled really delicious.
	Very nice.
	I think that some of the media people can't get it out of their heads that the people that work in these commercial operations can't help themselves.
	And I think it's getting to them because if you play this clip, Central Coast, you'll see what I'm talking about.
	This is an outro.
	For this week's Ag Report, I'm Brianna Berman-Solo, your Central Coast News.
	What?
	How come I didn't understand this one?
	She says Central Coast schnooze.
	For this week's Ag Report, I'm Brianna Berman-Solo, your Central Coast schnooze.
	That's right, it was the Ag Report, so yes, it was the snooze.
	What are you doing?
	Central Coast snooze.
	What are you doing watching the Ag Report, Dvorak?
	I always watch the Ag Report.
	It's very important in California to watch the Ag Reports.
	Now, if you didn't think that was bad enough.
	Yeah, oh no.
	Okay, we're wrapping up.
	The Armed Services Committee has finally voted on a bill, and they're going to just pass it, and they're in the process of doing the voting and the rest of it, and then this happens, clowning in Congress.
	The chair now recognizes the gentleman from Texas, Mr.
	Thornberry, Vice Chair of the House, for the purpose of a motion.
	Mr.
	Chairman, I move the committee report the bill, H.R. 1960, as amended favorably to the House with a recommendation that it do pass.
	The question is on the motion of the gentleman from Texas, Mr.
	Thornberry.
	So many as are in favor will vote aye.
	Aye.
	Those opposed, no.
	I call for a vote.
	I want to count.
	I'm sorry to interrupt this late date, but I would be doing a bad job.
	We have a member of our staff for his birthday today as well.
	What?
	We don't have a song.
	We'll sing.
	Kind of embarrassed about that.
	But Tim McLeese, who has done an outstanding job for us.
	Thank you.
	What is going on?
	So, Mr.
	Chairman, if you want to quickly, quickly sing the Republican song.
	Would you like that song?
	Yes, they do the Republican song.
	I don't remember.
	This is your birthday song.
	It doesn't last too long.
	Hey, second verse is much like the first.
	This is your birthday song.
	It doesn't last too long.
	I'm trying to give you guys a chance to learn this.
	It takes some of us years.
	Happy birthday.
	I'd like to thank the members for working in such a harmonious, bipartisan manner.
	The heck is this?
	That's what it was.
	You're watching your Congress at work.
	Wow.
	And then they get thanked for the harmonious manner in which they sang together?
	Alright, well then I get to do something stupid that was on television.
	This came in this morning.
	I'm sure you've heard about it.
	So the Bilderberg group, what you call, John, the drinking club, is going on over there in Watford.
	Watford, I believe, is where Elton John is from.
	I think.
	Is he invited?
	I think he's performing in the foyer, actually.
	And, you know, every single year, we've looked at this.
	I've met a couple Bilderbergers, the current Minister of Foreign Affairs, the Secretary of State, I guess, is what you'd call him in the Netherlands.
	He's the guy that I interviewed him once on the Dutch radio show where they burned the station to the ground.
	And he said, you're doing very important work here.
	You've got to continue this.
	He was trying to give me a clue, like, yeah, we're really up to no good.
	But this Bilderberg, you know, it's like, oh, the last time was, oh, they're there, Romney's the man, the New World Order has determined Romney's going to win.
	Well, how'd that work out?
	So, now I'm much more on the drinking club front.
	But this year, there must be 3,000 people out there.
	And it's funny because you can see now whether some of them are...
	I'm sure some people are doing it intentionally.
	I have always suspected Alex Jones of doing this.
	You know, there was an actual guy in a clown suit.
	The clown makeup on running around.
	There's people ventriloquists.
	Now you're talking.
	Yeah, the whole thing.
	So it makes it look like a bunch of nutjobs.
	True, true freaking nutjobs.
	Some people have very good analysis.
	There's some really intelligent people there.
	We try to give an alternative version of what's happening in the world.
	But what discredits us time and time again, Alex Jones is an a-hole.
	He goes out there and he does this stuff on mainstream television, which makes it that much harder for anyone to question any type of...
	True conspiracy, which are the stories the minority mainstream media propagates, when you do things like this on the BBC. And by the way, there's no reason for him to go on the BBC. He says he's got 3 million listeners, 40 million people watch his videos.
	There's no reason for him to go on the BBC on a Sunday.
	Just listen to how this ended.
	It was...
	Unbelievable how he is hurting, hurting the alternative media's chances at reaching anybody because the minute you bring up anything now, people think that this is who you are.
	And that's why, because the establishment doesn't know what to do.
	Now, Alex has this point, and it's an important one.
	I would have, say, ten years ago said, listen to all this stuff.
	He believes that people put cancer virus in vaccine in order to create a eugenics program.
	That's what he believes.
	We talk about medical discoveries.
	And we would have said, and I would have said, hey, that's kind of mad, and so on.
	And it's an interesting psychological phenomenon to dismiss it.
	The problem is that conspiracy theories like this are believed in...
	Hey, listen.
	I'm here to warn people.
	You keep telling me to shut up.
	This isn't a game.
	Okay?
	Our government in the U.S. is building FEMA camps.
	We have an NDAA where they disappear people now.
	You have this arrest for public safety, life in prison.
	You are the worst person I've ever interviewed.
	No, no.
	It's basically off with their heads, disappear, take them away.
	David, thank you for being with us.
	Infowars.com.
	You're watching the Sunday politics.
	We have an idiot in the program today.
	Freedom will not stop.
	You will not stop freedom.
	You will not stop the republics.
	Humanity is awakening!
	Infowars.com!
	I'll be looking at you the week ahead with our political panel.
	Until then, the Sunday politics across the UK. Think of the public isn't waking up!
	Well, you got to give him credit.
	He got the URL in, that's for sure.
	Twice.
	Now, so I think this really, I think it's unnecessary.
	Before you go, can I just interrupt for a second?
	Because I want to hear what you say.
	But this reminds me of that guy that has the question marks all over his suit.
	Remember that guy?
	The Riddler?
	He sold a book of how you can get all this money from the government.
	Oh, yeah, that guy, yeah.
	And he had all these question marks all over his suit.
	I had an agent, I won't mention his name because it's ridiculous, who said, you know what you ought to do?
	I know you can get a bestseller out of this because you've got the same guy.
	You know that guy, I forgot his name.
	You should do something like that.
	This is like what Alex Jones is doing.
	He's just a clown.
	Yeah, a complete, complete clown.
	Here's the guy.
	Hold on, what's his name?
	I got him on the Googles.
	Free money.
	Matthew Lesko.
	Yeah, Lesko.
	You know, you could pull it off, actually.
	I see if you put on the suit and the bow tie.
	The bow tie, that's what I really need.
	That really tops it.
	So what were you thinking when you heard this?
	By the way, I will...
	No, no, no.
	I can't take it.
	I can't take it.
	No.
	Well, what was that?
	You can't take the clip of the day?
	No.
	No, I can't take it.
	I cannot accept it.
	I just can't accept it.
	No, I can't.
	I don't think it's that great.
	Okay.
	No, thank you very much.
	I appreciate it.
	I'll hold it in abeyance.
	You've got a second place.
	You know, after you compared me to Glenn Beck, that still kind of smarts a little bit.
	Poor thing.
	You won't be so sensitive after Mickey shows up and slaps you around.
	This is so unnecessary and so stupid and so counterproductive.
	It really is.
	Now, you've just got to question the motives.
	No, I totally agree with you on this.
	This guy has got some motives behind this sort of ranting because it makes everybody, including us, look like, oh, not a conspiracy, jerks.
	And here's what's really important to understand.
	He is so 1970 with his FEMA camps, and what else was he yelling about?
	They're coming to take you away.
	The NDA has been disappearing people.
	Okay, so here is what you need to understand.
	It is so much more subtle, but so much more worse than that.
	It is so beyond.
	No one's coming to take you away to a FEMA camp.
	No, I think you having those kids clips...
	Yes, this is the subtlety of it.
	Yeah, the kids, oh, free press, that's not important.
	We don't need that.
	Yes, this is the real problem.
	This is really where it's going.
	This is what you have to protest.
	If you really want to do something...
	Do this with your own family.
	Do this in your own environment.
	Do this with your own friends.
	Now it's gotten that much harder.
	You can't just say, well, this is nuts.
	We're teaching our kids to cower in the corner.
	We're teaching people to, what was the term again?
	We all have to balance out your security for your freedom.
	This is the thing you need to fight.
	The only thing that he has right, and I wish he didn't, is the whole idea of an information war.
	That is the truth.
	And it's so much more damaging.
	But if they want to kill you, dude, that's not a problem.
	We just released one of the viruses.
	There's tons of ways to do it.
	They don't have to come and take you away.
	You know what?
	It's annoying.
	They're not going to take you away.
	It's annoying to have to stack bodies anywhere or put them in camps and take care of them.
	They don't want that.
	Yeah, it's too much work.
	It's too much work.
	They're re-educating your children.
	You're no longer important.
	You and I, John, I think we have no stake in the outcome anymore, quite honestly, which I think is why we are so free.
	No, I agree.
	I think we have zero stake in the outcome.
	Yeah.
	And I actually even think, you know, my kids have, maybe Jay might have some, I think this is a long-term process.
	Yeah.
	Probably take one more generation and then you just have the whole public could be gone.
	You know, essentially we lose the republic to the one world order or whatever.
	Or whatever the thing is.
	We'd probably be running it.
	I'm not saying that, you know, we would be running it.
	But it's like the public could just be left behind.
	But it is truly only a matter of you changing your own attitude and behavior.
	That's all that it is.
	When Miss Mickey says, this is great, and people are going to wake up, I have to say, I'm cautiously a little optimistic, but you really have to, we've got to work it so much more.
	And you need to do very simple things.
	Like saying, don't install Flash or the new Adobe whatever, but also, hey, did you know that the First and Second and Third and Fourth Amendment, that they're not rights, but that they are actually rights you already have, and this is stuff the government can't do to your existing rights?
	These are very minimal things, but when people see that, they go, huh?
	They don't even know this.
	I don't even know this.
	I know that one little fact which you like to pound, which I think you should because I never do it, is really important for people to realize that the Constitution was to keep the government from doing things, not to give them abilities to do things.
	And the president who keeps saying his first responsibility is to protect the American people is not true.
	That is not his responsibility.
	You can look in Article 2 And I picked it up just the other day.
	It is not true.
	It's just not.
	He's supposed to do meetings, he's supposed to nominate people, and he is the commander-in-chief, which does not mean he gets to declare war.
	Does not mean he gets to do any of that.
	He gets to have more meetings and he gets to give some advice and take some advice.
	He does have a responsibility towards Congress to suggest.
	He is, in fact, the President is supposed to, by Article II, petition the government on behalf of the people.
	That is one of the President's most important jobs.
	He's supposed to listen to the people and then go, okay, people, I got you.
	And he's supposed to go to Congress and say, hey, Congress, here's what the people want.
	Instead, he's become this elaborate pitchman to pitch whatever the agenda is on the inside.
	And this particular president, I have to say, I feel very, very sorry.
	Because I thought for the longest time, up until this week, I thought he was really part of the evil empire.
	And now I find out he's just an actor.
	Really just an actor.
	And he's afraid.
	He's afraid for his job.
	He's afraid for his life.
	Because he doesn't want to wind up like Martin Luther King.
	He's not going to fight against this stuff.
	He's not going to fight for anybody.
	He's going to shut up, read his lines, don't bump into the furniture, don't make waves.
	Because he doesn't want to die.
	The only thing he might do, and I'm only repeating what we've heard on this show.
	This is not something I don't want to be taken the wrong way.
	The only thing he might do is he might punch out early.
	Say, screw this.
	He's talked about it.
	He said, you know, Michelle would take $100 million.
	They'd go.
	He says today, he says, well, you know, I'll be gone sometime in the next three and a half years.
	Might be sooner rather than later.
	Don't waste your time impeaching this guy.
	Your problem is much, much bigger.
	Much bigger.
	You've got to get every single one of these douchebags out of Congress and the Senate.
	Just every single one of them.
	You've got to have a complete reboot.
	And we have no stake in that.
	That's going to take decades.
	And there's no way that anyone would do it because of the way it's rigged.
	Yeah, because only Congress can impeach people in Congress.
	I look this up.
	They've gerrymandered their way into permanent jobs.
	John Boehner, for example, is a known fact that he could be a child molester and he would not get voted out of that spot because they've gerrymandered his area.
	Does it make any sense to people where you have these districts, representative districts, and you have the district that has a little gob up here, and there's a long, thin line that may go down 100 miles, and then over to the left where there's another gob.
	Right, yeah.
	And this person represents this crazy district.
	Yeah, we're doing this in Texas now, too.
	It's incredible, the redistricting.
	Yeah, they read districts and say, well, I'll tell you what, I'll do a deal with it.
	You can have this, this, and this, and they'll vote Democrat no matter what.
	But you've got to give me this, this, and this because this is all Republican territory, and then I know I've got a job for life.
	That's what they've done.
	I would recommend that just in your own little circle of influence, your own little sphere of influence, is where you can make these changes and live a happy life.
	Don't worry about buying seeds.
	No, that's not going to help you and make you happier.
	Or a storable food or a water filter.
	A water filter, I'm not against any of that, but clowns like this, that's useless.
	You can run some really crappy vodka through those water filters and it actually improves the play.
	So I have not turned on the television since Miss Mickey left.
	I have not, and not even CNN or anything.
	I've only been watching online.
	It was kind of my test.
	And I think that it's been very successful.
	I don't think the show has suffered whatsoever.
	And I feel fantastic.
	I feel really, really good.
	I've been very productive.
	I've done a lot of fun things.
	I'm a little disappointed.
	There is one thing that's a real bummer.
	Real bummer.
	Because I'm so excited about ham radio and I got some ideas about Morse code, which has been around for 170 years and is still valid and relative today.
	And I find out the FBI has put out a tender, a tender where they are requesting to purchase something.
	They have to do this.
	RFP. Yeah, RFP. Request for a person, yeah.
	So there's this document, and it's the required, so it's the equipment that they want.
	ICOM 9500, AH800 antenna, Yaesu VX8DR with Mars mod, FC40 antenna, ICOM IC9100. Kenwood THD72A, Kenwood TM710, 2 meter, 70 centimeter, ICOM ICR2. I mean, it goes on and on.
	They are essentially building an entire lab because they heard that I was making Morse code cool again.
	Yes, there's a good one.
	Hey, that curry is all over this.
	What's curry doing?
	We've got to stop that guy.
	We've got to listen in on what he's doing.
	So just before we go, I've got one last thing.
	Actually, I can put this off.
	I'll put it off until Thursday.
	Can I ask you a question, though?
	Are you doing a tweet today?
	Yes, I am.
	Oh, I've polluted you.
	Perfect.
	Yay, whore.
	I don't know what you're talking about.
	It's all going to be about prism.
	And you're not going to be able to shut up.
	No, I'm going to tell them the same story.
	I've got the column.
	I've got the whole thing.
	I'm going to not change it much.
	And you're not going to mention Adobe at all?
	I couldn't do that.
	You had all this stuff.
	It's not in my head.
	Okay.
	All right.
	I do have a little thing.
	We play end of show, or you can play it now, or you can play it and never play it.
	But I decided...
	I've done this before.
	John Kerry gave a long speech.
	It was like an hour.
	And so I started skipping through it.
	And I realized that you can skip through a John Kerry speech and just pick up a word or two.
	And not miss anything.
	And you realize that all he does is throw in cliche after cliche.
	He's droning on it.
	Click, click, click, click, click, click.
	And it's just like dumb, useless speaker.
	This guy...
	Useless eaters.
	He's a useless speaker.
	He's terrible.
	Well, should I play this?
	You play it for as long as you can stand it.
	Okay.
	More for human rights.
	And let me point out, this is John Kerry, Secretary of State, who signs his name John F. Kerry.
	So you all kind of get the inference that he's the new JFK. He's the second coming of Cavalot.
	Community.
	As many of you might know...
	Even if it's just for a short while.
	I'm inclined to act as a possibility in a time of promise.
	Tremendously to each and every one of you.
	The deep personal connection that I, survivors and veterans, and to sit at that ceremony in 1986, almost 30 years ago, at the top of the mountain, across the Dead Sea, we had a big debate.
	Why don't we just call him Cliche Carey from now on?
	Cliche Carey.
	Cliche Carey.
	It's a good name.
	And it's like when he speaks, he can't say in 1986.
	It has to be in 1986, almost 30 years ago.
	And what is it?
	The Gregorian calendar.
	I mean, he can't just tell you what his point is.
	He has to just yak.
	In 1936, in the year of our Lord, almost 30 years ago, which is three decades.
	Cliché, Kerry.
	I need to do two plugs here.
	Two plugs.
	One is one of our relatively new listeners, James Prohashka, Has released a self-published book on Amazon.
	It's an interesting book, so it's for the book club.
	Andrew Jackson and the Vampires, an alternative historical fiction screenplay.
	And it's a screenplay.
	It's a script.
	It's printed like a script.
	It reads like a script.
	And I say it's pretty funny.
	And it's kind of one of these things.
	It's a short book.
	One of these things that you read and you go, ugh.
	So that, and then completely...
	I wanted to...
	Do you remember Kevin the Blade?
	Kevin the Blade?
	Yeah, Kevin the Blade.
	He was the Canadian kid who listened to No Agenda, and I was looking for someone to help me edit the big app show when I was still doing that.
	Remember him?
	No, that's some time back.
	Yeah, back in the L.A. days.
	So Kevin the Blade, and he basically gave up and went back to Canada.
	With his girlfriend, and he's been tootling around, but he has come up with a...
	And I've always...
	He was an intern, essentially.
	I paid him whatever I could, but he really worked basically for no money.
	And so I wanted to thank him by giving him a plug for his new project, which I think is going to be a massive hit.
	And he's doing a...
	I don't know if it's a Kickstarter or an Indiegogo or something.
	Anyway, it's called Come Giggle With Me.
	ComeGiggleWithMe.com.
	And it's a reality cooking show with people who are stoned on marijuana.
	That's funny.
	You know, I've always wanted to do a talk show.
	Really?
	Similar to this.
	But it was different.
	My idea is this, and I still think it's valid.
	The name of the talk show is Legally Drunk.
	Okay, that sounds about it.
	And you have to have a breathalyzer.
	Right, to make sure you're legally drunk.
	And you take the breathalyzer, and then the announcer comes over and the big thing slams on the screen, Legally Drunk!
	Okay, you're good to go.
	And then what?
	Then you get on the talk show?
	Yeah.
	Then you go out, you're on the talk show, I'd be the host, I would be sober.
	Yeah, uh-huh.
	And you just get people yakking drunk, because they'll say all kinds of crazy things.
	It'd be a great show.
	I like it.
	I like it.
	Well, so in this case, five stoners are pitted against each other to see who can cook the best munchies and throw the best party.
	Oh, but this is similar.
	Legally drunk is good.
	How about legally baked?
	I think it's funny when people are stoned, because when people are drunk, they can also get aggressive and...
	Well, that's fine too.
	That's good television.
	It's great television.
	I would produce this with you.
	Yeah.
	And here's your host of Legally Baked.
	Who would be your first guest?
	I think first you've got to find people that like to drink.
	I think that's the case.
	I can do legally.
	I'll do it.
	I'll get baked for your show to be a guest.
	Baked to me implies marijuana or something like that.
	Yeah, yeah, no.
	I don't want to do legally drunk.
	I don't like drunk people.
	No, no.
	I'm not going to do a baked show.
	No.
	It's too slow moving.
	Nobody would ever be aggressive and they wouldn't start yelling or falling off the chair drunk.
	Come on, it's a good opportunity.
	Yeah, you're right, you're right, you're right.
	What am I thinking?
	Fantastic.
	Oh, hold on.
	All right, I guess that's it.
	We actually have a little jingle for that.
	It's time to drink up.
	There you go.
	That would be your opening.
	That would be the opening.
	Drink up.
	Whew!
	Okay, well, quite a show, I would say.
	You have to get moving.
	You're going up there, right?
	Yeah.
	Oops.
	Sorry, I'm going to try that again.
	Crazy not doing it.
	Yeah, no, it's good.
	And I shall be putting the finishing touches on cleaning up the house here for the lady of the manor as she returns.
	She's leaving a mess.
	Yeah, right.
	That's some great advice there, John.
	You're already married.
	You don't have to show off.
	Besides that, usually when guys clean up the house and the woman comes home after some...
	She says, wow, what did you do?
	The house is a mess.
	You can't win.
	That's true.
	That's true.
	You can't win.
	Absolutely.
	Absolutely.
	All right, everybody!
	Thank you very much for tuning in to The Best Podcast in the Universe, where we bring you our analysis of worldly events and such twice a week, Thursdays and Sundays here.
	And, of course, we'll be back on Thursday to bring you another jam-packed episode.
	Who knows what will happen?
	If you're a celebrity, I'd be careful.
	Someone's got to die between now and Thursday to change the news cycle.
	I'm looking at you, Mandela.
	Coming to you from the Travis Heights Hideout in Austin, Texas.
	Good morning, everybody.
	My name is Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, where it's very windy for some unknown reason, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We will talk to you again on Thursday right here on No Agenda.
	Bollocks!
	This is a fact.
	The best podcast in the universe!

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