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March 31, 2013 - No Agenda

02:51:20

500: Codeword Austin

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Time	Text
	Your protection for, you know, the police state.
	Stock up on mac and cheese.
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Sunday, March 31st, 2013.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination Episode 500!
	This is No Agenda.
	Digging the fallout shelter here at the Travis Heights Hideout, where SoCo meets MoFo in the capital of the drone star state, Austin Tejas.
	In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
	From northern Silicon Valley, where I ask the question, 500 what?
	And we're off to a great start.
	There we go.
	That's the way it goes.
	Yeah, sorry.
	The 500 shows.
	Yeah, for some reason, you just, like, went really soft on me.
	Oh, well, thank you for nothing.
	Yeah, it's okay.
	Well, happy 500, John.
	Wow.
	Very few people can do 500 of anything.
	Yeah, do 500 push-ups.
	Do 500 nice things.
	Can you count 500 nice things you've done in your life?
	Oh, easy.
	You?
	Really?
	Oh, yeah.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Wow, man.
	Well, anyway, it's been a pleasure, John.
	Okay, adios.
	Well, it may be adios.
	Seriously, you know, Austin, Texas is targeted by the evil Kim Jong-un.
	For obvious reasons.
	One of the prime targets.
	That's why I can't get into that country.
	They mocked my father's wine collection.
	Yeah, that is the stupidest thing ever.
	You know, and I... Do they just make this stuff up as they go along?
	Well, I've been looking, so, you know, because what's interesting is if you look at the picture, and it's so obvious that someone's in cahoots with somebody somewhere, because the picture that is all zoomed in and enhanced...
	Well, let's back up and give people a little information of what we're talking about.
	Well, let me play...
	I have a clip to set it up.
	Of course, of course I have a clip to set it up.
	Pass the picture of Kim Jong-un.
	Putting North Korean rockets on standby inside his military command.
	There's a chart marked U.S. mainland strike plan with missile trails aiming at Hawaii, California, D.C., and for some reason, Austin, Texas.
	I like the way the guy does that.
	Everyone's been doing this.
	Like, Austin?
	Are you kidding me?
	Who gives a crap about Austin?
	So this...
	I think the Austin thing was a code.
	Yeah.
	Whoever dreamed this thing up, and they put that little piece of humor.
	I'm sure they were chewed out for it, by the way.
	Well, it's obvious.
	We know that there's a couple things going on in Austin.
	We know that every single major military or intelligence dude who's retired lives in Austin.
	So I'm thinking that's, you know, Stratford is in Austin.
	It's like this is a big intelligence town.
	It's quiet, but this is the intelligence town.
	So I think that...
	That's why you're there.
	Yeah.
	Thank you.
	Yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	That's why I was so attracted to the old intelligence dudes.
	Yeah.
	That's what it was.
	Exactly.
	So, I agree.
	I think that's what the code is.
	It's like, hey, you know.
	Or maybe you think it was a joke code and that's why?
	Yeah, I think it was a joke code.
	Yeah, that's possible.
	The whole thing is dubious.
	When I first heard this report, it went like this.
	Kim Jong-un found out that America was doing military training with the South Koreans.
	This annoyed him, so he repositioned all the rockets and started aiming them just in case he had to fire them at the U.S. and every place else.
	Yeah.
	And then they always finish according to reports or according to...
	It's never according to...
	I mean, there are news broadcasts out of North Korea.
	I suppose they could get them from there.
	No, no, no.
	It's never like that.
	No, it's never like that.
	No, it's always some mysterious source.
	Yeah, well, it's always the North Korean...
	I guess the movie's doing pretty well.
	Yes, it's the North Korean News Agency.
	And if you look, because I went to their website, which is hosted, it's a.jp address, which I think is dubious by itself.
	In Japan.
	Yeah.
	Okay, so I guess, literally the.kr forwards to.kr,.jp, whatever.
	And the only picture I could find from the North Korean news agency, it was indeed the picture, but of no resolution to actually be able to see the map.
	Nowhere could I find that.
	The only news outfit that had the high-resolution image where you see the little line with Austin on it was Getty Images.
	And it's copyright Getty Images.
	Where do those guys get off unless, oh, wait a minute, maybe they actually did create the image.
	It makes no sense to me.
	That's the only thing I can think of.
	I didn't catch the Getty Images scam.
	Oh, yeah.
	Look for the image that is zoomed in, and it's copyright Getty Images.
	I mean, come on.
	Are you kidding me?
	That's a good one.
	I got something great for you, though, because in 1960...
	They pulled this scam.
	Well, they pulled it before 1960.
	Back in the day, we didn't have Department of Homeland Security.
	We didn't have FEMA. We had something called Civil Defense.
	And the civil defense guys, you know, they're legendary for their propaganda, which, of course, at the time, everyone bought into very much like the crap we're buying into today.
	Only they had fallout shelters.
	Yes, and duck and cover.
	And there's a 25-minute propaganda video about a nuclear attack on Austin.
	That I have to share a little bit with you because there's a whole setup and the whole idea is follow instructions, shut up slave, go to the fallout shelter, don't ask questions.
	So there's one guy, he's trying to escape out of town, he runs out of gas, he flees on foot, and of course he's going to perish.
	But here is the relevant piece of what we are looking forward to since 1960.
	By now, the streets of Austin are almost deserted.
	That's right.
	Now they have shot.
	After shot, there's South Congress.
	There's the Capitol.
	There's the streets.
	Deadly, deadly silent.
	Everyone's in the shelter.
	Everyone is where they should be, following instructions.
	And then at 19 minutes past the original alert.
	Now, pay attention to the music.
	A nuclear explosion occurs 25 miles to the west of Austin in the hills of the Edwards Plateau.
	Wait, wait, wait.
	Listen to the music.
	Listen to the music.
	Is that coincidence or what?
	It's the Bishvat.
	It's our pre-stream music.
	Yeah, I think everyone's figured that out, though.
	Yeah, well, not everybody.
	So, uh...
	They're showing a bunch of devastation.
	Yeah, they're showing the devastation.
	Here it is.
	Here it is.
	Listen to this.
	An explosion, presumed to be nuclear, has occurred near Austin.
	Persons in shelters, stay where you are.
	Those who are not in shelters should take cover immediately.
	If shelters are not available, go to a sub-basement.
	If a sub-basement is not readily accessible, proceed to the nearest building.
	Close all doors and windows.
	Stay on the first floor near the center of the house.
	And it just goes, I'll play the epilogue at the end of the show, where everyone lives except for the guy who ran away, for which this news is no longer relevant.
	Yeah, so this is, it's like, it's just an update on the same old stupid, didn't JFK have this script?
	Only it was the Russians.
	Well, yeah, I mean, everyone's, it's just kind of a, It's pathetic that we have to continually frighten.
	I mean, I can see somebody in the government thinking, well, you know, just in case, better be safe than sorry.
	Well, no, it's worse than that, John.
	Because the news media, here is an expert former Pentagon guy.
	Everyone's rolled out.
	He thinks it's so funny.
	He's actually snickering.
	When he's saying, oh yeah, because the question is, and this is, CNN is just, I mean, Jeff Zucker, who's now running the show over there, he's just like, I don't know, he must get two paychecks.
	You know, one from the White House and one from Time Warner.
	So, this is crazy how they're just rubbing it in your face.
	Okay, now, Kim Jong-un is saying he is being provoked because of the U.S. military exercises taking place in South Korea.
	So, why would he...
	Hold it, hold it, hold it.
	He's saying, so they have a clip of him actually talking and saying this?
	That's what Kim Jong-un is saying.
	Thank you.
	So, they have a clip.
	No, of course not.
	This is what's so beautiful.
	This is how the giant telescreen works, the giant voice system.
	So they spake it up and they say he's saying, but we don't know that he is saying and they don't have a clip?
	I think they could have gone one step further and they could have said sources are saying, Kim Jong-un is saying.
	That would have been even better.
	Well, that's really throwing it.
	Just play it.
	But the B-roll, while this is being stated as fact, is of him looking out the bunker window with the binoculars.
	This is how it works.
	This is a good one.
	It's my favorite.
	I love it.
	And he's up at the demilitarized zone.
	You know, that's why Obama did that thing, and he has the binoculars on the other side.
	I mean, it's built this image for us, like, hey, I see you, I see you, I see you.
	I guess stealth bombers for these kind of attack practices, given the climate right now involving North Korea.
	All right, get it.
	Oh, did you hear that?
	Did you hear that?
	That was the guy laughing.
	Yeah, no, but he's going, she's saying, what is going on with this?
	And he says, well, he's like, yeah, because he knows the whole thing's a scams, a setup here.
	Given the climate right now involving North Korea.
	Right, now the...
	Yeah, okay.
	You want me to answer this stupid question?
	You've got to get some guy with no sense of humor to do these things, otherwise you risk the guy laughing.
	Oh, well, I'm glad you asked, because Erin Burnett, as we say here in Austin, Target, Target Austin, she had the spokeshole on from the Pentagon, and he had no humor, but she was just shoveling it on so high.
	Yeah.
	And, you know, we keep taking it.
	Maybe that's all this country can do.
	We keep taking it.
	How do you respond to that?
	Well, provocative behavior is not exactly new in North Korean history.
	This has been something they've done for decades.
	So they go through these cycles from time to time, and we have to deal with them.
	We have to be sober, calm, cool, collected about these periods.
	That's what we're doing right now.
	Why can't we be drunk?
	I think that would be much funnier.
	And we are assuring our South Korean allies day to day that we stand with them in the face of this.
	This is not a good answer.
	Aaron, do something about it.
	I guess the question always is, you know, you want to be sober and calm, but mistakes can happen.
	And the defense secretary, Chuck Hagel, spoke a little bit about that today, about the fine line here.
	Here he is.
	Remember, Chuck Hagel, the guy who's a total nincompoop, couldn't answer any question right, had to go back and restate his answers because they were so wrong.
	He definitely has no sense of humor.
	He is perfect, and he, of course, is going to ratchet it up a little bit, but just enough for Aaron to really hammer it home.
	You only need to be wrong once.
	God!
	And I don't know what president or what chairman or what secretary of defense wants to be wrong with when it comes to nuclear threats.
	How can you ensure you won't be wrong on this?
	Okay, good question.
	Stand by, because she's going to hammer it.
	The Secretary is absolutely right.
	There's always the risk of miscalculation, and we have guarded against miscalculation on the Korean Peninsula for over 60 years.
	And the Secretary and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, it's their job to ensure that our military is prepared.
	Okay, so now I'm Jeff Zucker.
	I'm the new head of programming at CNN. I'm in the control booth, and this is boring me to tears now.
	So, I'm going to talk into Erin's IFB, which is the little earpiece she has in.
	What does that stand for again, IFB? I used to know.
	We used to know that stuff, didn't we?
	Interfoldback.
	It's like intercom foldback, I think is what it is.
	Yeah, it's something crazy.
	I'll look it up.
	All right.
	So, okay.
	Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron.
	Aaron, Aaron.
	Dirty nukes.
	We are.
	Dirty nukes.
	We hope to avoid miscalculation.
	Come on, Aaron.
	We've got to scare the people.
	Citizens are bored of this crap.
	So, you know, some people have said, well, of course, there's actually bombing the United States, and they don't yet have the capability to do that with a nuclear warhead.
	Some people, I'd like to point out.
	That was probably me, Jeff Zucker, in her ear.
	They do have the capability, and some experts have been on this program saying that they would, if they could, create some sort of a nuclear dirty bomb and put it, say, in the middle of Times Square.
	Yeah!
	Hold on a second.
	Yeah, now you're talking, Aaron.
	Yeah, that's giving to her.
	What would be the point of this?
	To scare you!
	By the way, IFB stands for Independent Fashion Blogger.
	Oh, no, no, I'm sorry.
	Interruptible Foldback.
	I had the foldback part, right?
	Interruptible.
	I think when we still had tubes, we had tubes, we had the interruptible foldback.
	Hey, I'll call you on the interruptible foldback.
	How far we've come from that to Skype, eh?
	Oh, man.
	And both of us have witnessed those technologies in our lifetime.
	I still have a custom-made IFB. I have one somewhere where they mold your ear.
	I keep it just in case.
	Yeah, wishful thinking.
	I have my own IFB. You do.
	You have your own.
	You have to use the sleazy one they provide you in the studio.
	I used to do that too.
	It's like, oh, I have my own IFB. I'd like to...
	And the audio guy was like, really?
	No, actually, audio guys appreciate that stuff.
	So let's work for them.
	I had an audio guy tell me, not to get completely off the subject with Inside Baseball, but he said it would be really cool if you brought your own lapel mic and you told the guy what your notch was.
	Oh, your notch filter.
	Nice.
	Very nice.
	Anyway, this is the word that I've only got one clip.
	But I could have clipped this a million times in the past two days.
	It's our favorite word.
	South Koreans have grown used to bellicose threats from across the border.
	Everywhere.
	Everyone's using the term now, bellicose.
	Bellicose?
	Yeah, everyone's using the term bellicose.
	You pay attention to it.
	That was bellicose.
	We talked about that.
	The president started this with bellicose.
	It's a part of the talking point.
	When someone uses that word, then you know it's a part of the talking point.
	Yeah, it is the talking point.
	That's all that it is.
	It's just one point.
	They use the word belly coast, I think, because it immediately conjures up the image of Kim Jong-un because he's a big guy with a big belly.
	So I went looking to see...
	I was trying to find out more about the North Korean news agency and I'm on their site and I see that Dennis Rodman was there, but he was not alone.
	See, this was not reported properly.
	He was there with the Harlem Globetrotters.
	Oh, I didn't know you brought the Globetrotters with him.
	Yeah.
	That's a lot of people.
	And this was underreported, to say the least.
	And I'm like, because you have a great thesis that after we listen to my Uncle Don, who we think is right, they just want to be a part of society, the global society, which includes not being told to shut up, slave, and stand in the corner.
	Yeah.
	And, you know, they want peace.
	They want peace.
	He wants the armistice, he says.
	He wants to get this war over with, which has never been discussed.
	And we won't even talk to him about it.
	Oh, we can't do that.
	Oh, it would be beneath us to talk to him.
	Yeah, can't talk about it.
	What is the deal going at that?
	It's actually one of the reasons I'd like to go there and ask...
	The North Koreans, what is the problem?
	What's the hang-up?
	Why are we, the USA, stretching this thing out forever?
	Well, here's what's interesting.
	Is there oil up there that we want to get hold of, or what?
	Well, your thesis was, probably, by the way, your thesis was that North Korea wants to be a tourist destination.
	Yeah, no, I still believe that.
	Well, who owns a majority stake in the Harlem Globetrotters?
	Ah, that big Live Nation or one of these big tourist guys.
	Them and Disney.
	Disney.
	Disney.
	Disney Parks, Disneyland.
	Disneyland North Korea, baby.
	Put it in the book.
	Put it in the book.
	I'm still waiting for the hostage crisis in Israel.
	Oh, we're going to be like that?
	Okay.
	Okay, I'm sorry.
	I don't want you to start calling me out either.
	How about Nelson Mandela dying at New Year's?
	Or Bush or Bush.
	Well, I'll tell you what.
	They put the plug back into Bush.
	Because they thought Hillary was going to kick it, and Bush wanted to see that.
	So they got the guy plugged in again, so he's going to go for a while.
	They can keep the moment.
	George, it's been a while.
	Pull.
	So, yeah.
	Yeah.
	By the way, Disneyland in North Korea is not much of a stretch.
	I mean, it makes nothing but sense.
	It does.
	The Koreans love that sort of thing.
	Of course.
	Of course.
	I'm not really joking.
	I would sign on to that prediction.
	Who owns Vice Corporation, by the way?
	They're completely independent, you sure?
	I'm pretty sure, yeah.
	No one's independent anymore.
	Well, I think these guys are pretty independent.
	That's why you don't see them blended in much with anything, with any coverage.
	Vice started as a...
	Oh, here we go.
	Vice.
	Started in 1994 as a newsprint monthly in Montreal.
	Oh, the Canadian.
	Oh, well.
	That explains it.
	So, really?
	Is anything really 100% independent in Canada?
	Yeah.
	We're independent, too, by the way.
	Yeah, but how do they make money?
	I have no idea.
	You know, sending people all over the globe.
	They have a high budget for sending people around.
	They've got a huge budget.
	But where's it coming from?
	There's no about page, aboot.
	Where's your aboot page?
	I'll have to look at that.
	So Nelson Mandela does look to be on the ropes finally, because everyone had their news packages ready for like, oh God.
	You know that the obits are all written, ready to go, they're voiceover, they've got to make sure the talent still works there.
	Yeah.
	So-and-so came out of retirement to report on...
	This is still on contract.
	And Time Magazine, of course, is pissed because I think they weren't clued in.
	And they had their obits ready and their cover and everything.
	And the Time editor was on...
	I can't remember.
	This might have been Morning Jew.
	And...
	Well, I can't believe they'd be out of the loop because Carney's from Time.
	Well...
	Or something changed, and they were in the loop and something changed.
	That's probably more like it.
	But it's very obvious.
	They were too in the loop.
	It's very obvious what their story is going to be when Nelson Mandela passes, which looks like it is kind of getting near that time.
	And we'll need that distraction when the North Korean thing is played out and nobody cares anymore.
	By the way, we're now showing a picture of the then-Senator Obama visiting Mandela.
	If we can go back to that other slide as well.
	That was a picture from 2005 when Senator Obama...
	He visited Mandela, already frail.
	And you can imagine the role that Mandela played just in the imagination of a young Barack Obama and all of his generation.
	But continue, Rick.
	And I think there are similarities between President Obama and Nelson Mandela in terms of their temperament.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	No, that's what we're going to get.
	Obama's jail and prison.
	In South Africa.
	South Africa?
	And he comes from some tribe there?
	Well, maybe that's true.
	By the way, did you see...
	God, let me just bring that up for a second.
	One of our...
	I'll go unnamed.
	One of our producers in Finland sent me a test paper from his, I think, 12-year-old who was in Finnish school, but they have English lessons.
	Hold on a second.
	Because I tweeted it.
	Let me just bring up the image.
	He sent me the actual image of a test.
	Here we go.
	Mandela's 94.
	That's a nice age.
	Alright, so here is questions about the USA and Canada.
	And it's multiple choice.
	And so here's question number one.
	The capital of the USA is A, New York, B, Washington, D.C., C, Chicago.
	So interesting that Chicago was put on that list, but correctly answered, B, Washington, D.C. The United States of America has A, 50 states and 200 million people, B, 49 states and 300 million people, or C, 50 states and 300 million people.
	That was answered correctly.
	Dinosaurs and fossils.
	There are many dinosaurs and fossils in Yellowstone National Park.
	B, New Orleans is famous for dinosaurs and fossils.
	I think Hookers and Blow was crossed off.
	And C, many dinosaur bones and fossils were found in North America.
	That would be the correct answer.
	But here's where it gets interesting.
	Number five, Barack Obama.
	A, when Barry was a boy, he lived in Kenya.
	B, Barry was born in Indonesia.
	C, as a boy, Barry lived in Hawaii.
	So, this is like really interesting.
	So they're propagating the birther memes.
	And this kid actually circled A when Barry was a boy.
	He lived in Kenya.
	That's how deep it goes.
	That's how deep.
	But his name is...
	The kid's...
	Is it a known fact that his name is Barry?
	Apparently.
	Because it's like, when did he become Barack Obama?
	When he wrote that book, I think, when he was at Harvard.
	The book where he said that he was actually from Kenya, that one?
	Yeah, that book.
	The book where in the bio on the book it says he's from Kenya.
	Right.
	But I found that fascinating, A, that that is a question, and B, that the kid answered it, Kenya.
	Yeah, I know.
	Well, that's interesting because it's obviously pushing the meme that it's okay.
	I think this might be it.
	It's okay to be a ruler.
	Not born in the United States.
	This may be some globalist kind of agenda or some one-world government thing.
	We don't know.
	But it seems that though this is entrenched or it wouldn't be showing up in Finland exactly that way.
	Isn't that nutty that that's in Finland, man?
	Yeah, it's just a...
	We must make a note.
	Yeah, we should.
	Let me say this.
	In the morning to you, John C. Dvorak.
	In the morning to you, Adam Curry.
	In the morning to all ships at sea, boots on the ground, feet in the air, and subs in the water, and all the dames and knights out there.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, exactly like that.
	And everybody in the chat room, noagendastream.com, noagendachat.net.
	We are very proud to have been serving you for 500 episodes.
	Thank you to our artists.
	Who have been there almost, I think from day one, in fact.
	And we want to thank Jay Young for creating the art for episode 499.
	Be very excited to see what the artwork is going to be for 500.
	I'm sure there will be a lot.
	You can always check it out at noagendaartgenerator.com.
	And I got an email before we get into thanking our producers for the program today.
	John, I was very excited to see an email from Molly Wood.
	And she says, Hello, Adam and John.
	I just wanted to say congratulations on the 500th episode to you and John.
	You were awesome.
	I'm looking forward to the next 500.
	I've attached this naked picture of myself for the occasion.
	Well, the naked picture's nice.
	Oh, darn, she says.
	I guess I must have forgotten the attachment.
	Oh, wow.
	Oh, yeah.
	So, this is the level of celebrityhood that we have coming in.
	That's it.
	To congratulate us.
	We're doing 500 shows.
	That's it!
	We have a...
	We didn't get a note from Clooney?
	Let me check.
	Maybe I missed something in the email.
	Let me see.
	Brain doctor guy.
	I'm taking your wife.
	No, that's not it.
	That's it.
	That was a hit on the market, by the way.
	Because now everyone's listening now at the Austin market.
	Herschel is our meat guy.
	Good.
	Oh, yeah.
	The market guys, it's good to have that kind of listenership.
	Actually, they were more valuable than Clooney.
	Thank you.
	They also hand out our CDs now.
	Miss Mickey is like putting stacks of No Agenda CDs on everyone's stall.
	Good.
	Texas is a good place to have a stronghold of listeners.
	That's correct.
	Maybe Bobby will come by and pick up a CD. He won't steal my wife though, that's for sure.
	Well, it seems unlikely.
	So let's thank a few people that will be the executive producers and associate executive producers for show 500.
	I have a few notes to read which are on, and you know they're real because they're on paper.
	Yep.
	Sir A.J. Reistad with $500.
	Actually, $505.
	He did a...
	You know how we're going to give a...
	This is...
	I think he did two.
	I think he did $500 and a $505.
	No, he did a $333 too, but he did a $505.
	That was, so he's also going to be the executive producer of show 505.
	Yeah.
	You know how we had to double?
	So he doubled forward instead of backwards.
	Oh, okay.
	Yeah, I got it.
	Love it.
	Love it.
	He's playing with this space-time continuum.
	Don't do that too often, AJ. No, no.
	It's going to ruin everything.
	Anyway, he says, this contribution will allow the two of you to confer upon me a baronetcy.
	According to the Book of Knowledge, all baronet seas, which is baronet seas, are distinguished by having a territorial designation.
	I therefore claim the entire Treasure Valley and the state of Ohio as my baronet sea.
	Okay, so Baronet A.J. Reistad.
	That was not on my titles list, by the way.
	No, no.
	Got it.
	Just because I have the note, and J.C. never got it.
	And so he will be Baronet of, I'm sorry, the state of Ohio?
	No, the entire Treasure Valley.
	Oh, thank you.
	Treasure Valley, Ohio.
	I believe that's a lava flow that is just rock hard.
	It's useless.
	That's okay.
	It's okay.
	Someone's going to look after it.
	And he also says a separate donation at $33.33 for my night pin.
	Nice.
	So whenever it happens, he says.
	Thank you very much.
	No hurry, he says.
	Thank you, Baronet Reichstadt.
	Yeah, Baronet.
	Anyway, Adam Smith in Calgary, Alberta is a $500 producer.
	Executive producer, ITM, Abdullah and Jabari.
	Long-time list.
	Just first-time donors.
	My brother-in-law, Mac, hit me in the mouth about a year ago, and I'm a faithful listener.
	You can put in the red book that we will be knights by the end of the year.
	Please split the donation between the two of us.
	You can do your own accounting, if you don't mind.
	Adam, this is one of our rules.
	And he'd like to get a mac and cheese.
	Karma.
	Minimum wage mac and cheese karma.
	Keep up the great world.
	Okay, we can do that.
	Minimum wage!
	In the mac and cheese life.
	Mac and cheese by Ayn Rand.
	You've got karma.
	Hey!
	Now we have some anonymous donors.
	An anonymous from an anonymous Parts Unknown Area 500 and an anonymous from Alexandria, Virginia for 500 who says he's in the government industrial complex and he's got things to tell us.
	Bring it on!
	We love it.
	PGP encrypted email.
	That'll hold for at least a day.
	Ralph Nellison, Sir Ralph, Ralph, Ralph, R-A-L-F, in Aachen.
	Aachen, Deutschland.
	This is the most boring donation ever.
	I'm not even drunk.
	Congratulations, Sir Ralph, on way to Barron.
	Thank you, Sir Ralph.
	And that's 500.
	Then we got SirBeerGeek500.
	He was hoping it would arrive in time.
	It did.
	I am SirBeerGeek.
	Congratulations on the show 500 of the most assiduously divine podcast in the universe.
	I don't use the podcast to amuse myself while commuting because I have retired.
	I'm now living the dream of just getting by.
	Woo!
	Woo!
	I do use No Agenda as an incentive to get me to exercise.
	My reward for getting outside and walking is to tune to the No Agenda podcast during my ambulation.
	It's a good incentive.
	I wonder if he drives a Velocipede.
	I have only a simple request.
	A shot at Karma to find some ammo.
	Yeah.
	Go to the range.
	Yes, I'm one of those gun nuts, followed by little girl, yay.
	Yeah, it's crazy.
	There's no ammo to be had.
	Yeah, you have to buy it.
	Yeah, you have to anticipate.
	No, it's all the crazy guys.
	They got it all.
	Adam Lanza.
	No, no, the government bought it all.
	Oh, really?
	You've been listening too much Alex Jones, my friend.
	No, the government bought a lot of ammo.
	I have a clip about that.
	And I told this to Annie Alex Jones.
	I have a clip about that in a moment.
	You've got karma.
	Yay!
	Pat Robertson was talking about that on the 700 Club.
	You're watching this the weirdest stuff.
	Oh, yeah.
	No, I'm sorry.
	Yeah.
	Pat Robertson.
	Yeah, you want to hear him?
	Yeah.
	Okay, so here we go.
	Pat Robertson is kind of nutty.
	This is the 700 Club.
	A couple of shocking things.
	Do you know Americans now have over 110 million cases of venereal disease?
	And 20 million young adults got it last year.
	That's the why I know.
	20 million.
	Now.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	Well, all the story we've got for you is like something out of science fiction.
	Long trains full of armored vehicles.
	Personnel carriers with armor.
	What are they for?
	The army going into battle against the enemy.
	They're used by Homeland Security against us.
	Ronald Reagan said the most fearful statement in the English language is, I'm from the government and I'm here to help you.
	I'm here to help, boy.
	I totally agree.
	Isn't that amazing?
	Well, Pat Robertson, I mean, he's an agent of fear.
	He's a little bit behind on these stories, isn't he?
	Yeah, a little, yeah.
	That armored car story's been going on.
	No, no, no, no.
	There's new, the FEMA guys have been rolling through California.
	There's new videos.
	They have tanks now.
	FEMA. FEMA. They need tanks.
	The guys, yeah.
	When the public gets up in arms.
	The guys who are supposed to save you.
	If I was them, I'd be armoring myself too.
	But no, Pat.
	I'd be playing the bullets.
	But Pat Robertson's job is to influence religious people who are, I would say, mainly retired.
	Because who else can watch this stupid crap of people who just really have got nothing better to do.
	And the way he says it even.
	Armored vehicles.
	It's like something out of a science fiction movie.
	They're here for us.
	And that's kind of crazy.
	Back to the donations.
	Executive producers, the celebratory...
	I have, by the way, I sent you another clip.
	Yes, I received that clip.
	Play that clip while I'm giving this.
	This is a clip of Celebrations.
	Okay, go ahead.
	Mark Abbott in Edmonton, Alberta.
	$500.
	Longtime burner.
	First time donor.
	I'd show value for value by giving my support.
	I like to give karma for any road trips you do this year.
	If you do make it to Western Canada, I'll finish off my knighthood in person.
	Great hair.
	Hope you win.
	Scruncher.
	All right.
	Here's some karma for you.
	Thank you, Mark.
	Appreciate it.
	You've got karma.
	Nice.
	500 shows and here's the production value, people.
	Listen to it.
	It's a loop, too.
	Moise Khan.
	Black Knight.
	That's right.
	Moise, who tried to get pictures of the Bin Laden compound in Abbottabad.
	Yeah, and he's in Alberta.
	He wants, thank you for providing this critical public service.
	Here's a fracking congratulations from Calgary Oil Town.
	Yeah, nice.
	Okay, it sounds like a dog dying, you know that?
	Sir Michael Miller, who will be named Viscount today, congratulations on show 500.
	He wants to be the Viscount of Marin.
	Marin, Marin County.
	Yeah.
	All right, man, it's a nice sailing there.
	He should have an Armada.
	Steven...
	Oh, Archduke?
	Not Archduke, he's Grand Duke.
	How can JC make a mistake like that?
	Oh, he calls himself Archduke.
	Which he can call himself anything he wants, but he's still Grand Duke.
	Steven Pelsmacher, ITM, John and Adam, I salute both of you for achieving 500 shows.
	A truly amazing and memorable feat.
	Please give yourself some karma to enable you to go for at least another 500...
	Excuse me.
	It's so tight.
	Yeah.
	Enable you to go at least another 500.
	Remember that the Archdukedom of Belgium and France will always have its drawbridge down to your visits.
	We will pour you the finest ales and wines and serve you the best of our cuisine.
	And lest we forget, our wenches shall always be especially welcoming.
	Yeah!
	Bashir Osman in Haro, Middlesex 500, or without comment, I think.
	Let me see if I got it.
	Ethan Katz in Austin, Texas, right down the road from 33333.
	Love you guys on the show.
	Here's some too-big-to-fail cash, straight from Wall Street.
	John, I used to carry around a computer shop with my backpack in the ninth grade.
	Perhaps this is why I was a virgin until 18.
	Hey!
	And if you keep up the good work, and can I get some generic karma to keep good times rolling as I recover from an eight-year marriage living in a new single life, a new single life in Austin, Texas, the best city for the best podcast in the universe.
	Yeah, hey, right on, Ethan.
	We should hang out and party.
	Not karma.
	David Mertens in Edmond, Oklahoma.
	33333.
	I had to get a donation in for show 500.
	Listen for eight months and can't be a cheap ass anymore.
	Keep up the good work.
	Can I get a science LGY karma?
	Does he mean...
	Just the regular science?
	No, the geeky science, I think.
	Oh, well, that's debatable.
	Yeah, that's different.
	But if I was him, that's what I'd want.
	Okay.
	Hold on a second.
	Shut up already!
	Science!
	You've got karma.
	Yes!
	Now you have a bunch of 31313s to help us celebrate.
	Show 500 on this Easter 2013.
	David McGee, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
	David in Pittsburgh, 313.
	Sir Rick, 313.
	Screw PayPal, he says, and that's his only message because he sent a check.
	Daniel Miller, Knoxville, Tennessee, 313.
	He needs some karma.
	You got it.
	You've got karma.
	Remco Van Dyke.
	Very good.
	1313.
	Donation to the best podcast in the universe.
	My 44th birthday.
	And give us some karma.
	Yep.
	I think you, um...
	You've got karma.
	You skipped over, uh...
	Daniel Miller.
	You skipped over David McGee's note.
	I don't know if that was on purpose.
	Oh.
	Well, I would have the note here then.
	Hold on.
	I don't have anything here.
	After giving up mass media six years ago for better health and intelligence, instead relying on friends, blogs, and podcasts as a filter for what's important, I've since tried a few news review type podcasts, albeit unsuccessfully.
	A few months ago, producer Michael Dunn hit me in the mouth.
	Before I had my first NA show listen, I thought it might be like NPR on the media.
	I was way off.
	The so-called media scrutiny effort of our national treasure is rubbish compared to the top-notch media deconstruction of the No Agenda show.
	And he gave us valuable insights, and that is 313.13 from a 33-year-old.
	An anonymous came in from Arnold, Maryland, and probably guess why.
	Thank you guys for all you do.
	You need some house buying karma.
	I hear you.
	You've got karma.
	Sam Menor, Box Hill, Australia.
	He'll be associate executive producer at 26969.
	Karma to Maynard.
	Oh.
	His podcast, Let Me To Yours.
	Hope it leads to hearing more from Maynard down here in Australia.
	Anybody needs to look up Maynard's stuff.
	Because Maynard, he's walking the...
	I mean, we're out there and we can do anything we want.
	But he actually has a job with...
	He has a job he's trying to keep.
	Yeah, he's trying to keep with ABC, the Australian Broadcast Corporation.
	I think he left ABC, didn't he?
	No, I think he's still hanging on by his fingernails or his eyelids or something.
	Yeah, no, I think he's...
	He's really slick.
	I mean, he is a very high-end...
	It's the only way to describe it.
	He's a high-end broadcast outlet-style media guy.
	And it's very hard to achieve the whole thing.
	That's a very difficult position to be in.
	It's hard to get there.
	Yeah, he's a good guy, and he's helped the show out a lot.
	So let me give him some karma there.
	Hold on a second.
	You've got karma.
	Just to make sure, Sir GQ, no name or location, just his title.
	Snow for the show, he wants some karma for sexy Mr.
	Curry.
	I don't know.
	Who's that?
	I think Sir GQ is hitting on me.
	Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.
	Yeah, well, you know.
	You've got karma.
	They don't call him Sir GQ for nothing.
	And Stanford Staub in Kuskia, Idaho.
	And how could I not give on the 500th anniversary of the best podcast in the universe?
	$234.
	Thanks for all you do.
	And that will close out our section of Well-Wishers for show 500 on this Easter 2013.
	And I want to thank everybody that helped us out there, especially...
	The ones who use celebratory numbers for us.
	But everyone is counted.
	And it reminds you to go to dvorak.org slash NA. We do have another show, 501, coming up.
	Yep.
	And we will continue to show 600, I would assume, and have another big day then.
	But that all depends on Kim Jong-un.
	Yeah, he may blow us both up any minute now.
	So these are real credits.
	Now, it's double credit.
	Anyone who came in with a 313.13 or with a 500 will be listed again today, as promised.
	So it'll be a real long credit list.
	And stand-alones, by the way.
	So you don't get lumped in.
	This is just like when you see the final episode of Dallas.
	Which will be a cliffhanger.
	Every one of our shows is basically a cliffhanger because you never know if we'll be back.
	You get a long list.
	It'll say executive producer, executive producer, executive producer, executive producer.
	So that's exactly what it's going to be here along with our associate executive producers.
	And we'll be thanking more people in our donation segment later on.
	It is very nice to always see the monthly donors come in.
	That stuff adds up, by the way.
	When you do a 33-33, you can get a knighthood that way, too.
	Or up your baron.
	Or a baron.
	Or a baron.
	Or a viscount.
	But you also support the work that we do, which we could not do if we had chosen the commercial route.
	And I'll just say, just on that note briefly, yesterday we went to the market, of course, and after that we had some coffee at Halcyon.
	I'm always waiting to be ambushed there.
	I mean, it'll be so easy.
	Might as well just paint a drone target on the roof of Halcyon, because that's where I am.
	You can set your clock by it.
	And there in the corner was the InfoWars magazine.
	Did you pick it up and tear it up and yell, death to Satan?
	Yeah, how did you know?
	No, but I picked it up.
	Man, it's one big ad.
	It's crazy.
	Seeds and water purification, gold.
	No, those whole packages of shortwave radio with your storable foods, with your seeds, with your water filter, with your gold.
	Oh!
	Low on content.
	Skateboard decks.
	Okay, that was kind of cool.
	We need those.
	No agenda skateboard deck.
	I don't know what a skateboard deck is.
	That's basically the skateboard without the trucks, without the wheels.
	Oh.
	It's just the wood.
	You can't go very fast on those.
	Alright, you can always go out and do what we need is propagating our formula properly.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Hey, citizen.
	Hey, citizen.
	Shut up!
	All right.
	Good work on that.
	I was hoping one of us would produce something at least.
	Oh, yeah.
	Well, I do have something.
	We're on show 500.
	We do have to do a little retrospective action.
	And I want to discuss a couple of things.
	I think people, the newer listeners, if we go back five years, let's say.
	Wow.
	Do we have to?
	Yes.
	Because I want to remind people of some of the stuff that we've done on this show that was either overlooked or nobody cared.
	Actually, in some situations, I can't even understand.
	We didn't understand it then, and as time has gone by, it's gotten even worse in so far as...
	What passes for news?
	What was news at the time?
	How we deconstructed it and how it disappeared.
	Let me understand your setup here.
	You're saying there are news items that have appeared over time over the past five years that we have certainly picked up on, discussed and deconstructed, but real news and interesting events that were overlooked by the mainstream purposely or not.
	Yeah.
	Now, let's look at one of the most interesting.
	I have one, two, three of these I want to go over.
	But the most interesting one to me, besides, and we'll go over the flu one in a minute, but the most interesting one to me was the crotch bomber.
	Now...
	I want to play.
	This is clip WTF 3-WTF. These are the ones with the number three or all of this guy.
	Got it.
	So 3-WTF. This is the opening salvo.
	This was Candy Crowley on CNN, and this was the opening salvo.
	And I want to remind people what happened and how we discussed this.
	But just listen to this.
	You also saw something strange happen when the fire started and everyone raced for him.
	What was it that you observed?
	Well, as this was all going on, I just happened to look over, and about ten seats ahead of me was, to the left-hand side, was a man who had a camcorder, and he was filming the entire thing.
	So, it was definitely a little out of the ordinary.
	I mean, I don't know why.
	He was standing up, and we were supposed to be seated, and he was filming it, so...
	We ought to just tell everybody that Gene Mazurve has reported tonight that the FBI says it has analyzed a number of videotapes that were shot by passengers on that flight, and none has proven particularly useful to the investigation.
	Nonetheless, there is a lot of commotion and someone is filming it, although in this day and age I suppose we probably shouldn't be too surprised since everything shows up somewhere eventually.
	Yeah, but it was an IMAX camera, Candy.
	That was the problem.
	It was a red camera.
	And if you remember this event, right after they landed, they took all the passengers one by one into a giant warehouse.
	That's right, and we thought that they were going to kill them.
	Well, I think that may have been what they were going to do if they'd gone right.
	I mean, who knows what the plan was, but they took him in there.
	I don't know if they gave him national security letters.
	We never heard from anybody again after that.
	The whole thing was kind of left to rest, let the media take over.
	Well, there was the lawsuit.
	And the lawyers who were on the plane who saw the agent help this guy board the plane without a passport in Amsterdam, there was a whole lawsuit about that and that was, I don't know, I mean, is that lawyer still alive?
	I don't know.
	I mean, that's the point.
	That's what I'm trying to make.
	We spot these things early.
	People have to remember that they happened.
	And then they just...
	There's no follow-up whatsoever because they just pull this thing and then they turn it into a propagandistic...
	You know, this was an attack and all the rest.
	So play Obama.
	Obama here goes after...
	This is one of his little things to go after the CIA when the whole thing was just a phony deal from the beginning.
	But here's Obama.
	It's been widely reported that the father...
	...of the suspect in the Christmas incident.
	Oh, I've forgotten about this.
	This is so good, John.
	Do you think we'll have one of these retrospectives on CNN this year, at the end of the year?
	Will it do all this?
	This?
	I don't think so.
	...warned U.S. officials in Africa about his son's extremist views.
	It now appears that weeks ago, this information was passed to a component of our intelligence community, but was not effectively distributed so as to get the suspect's name on a no-fly list.
	There appears to be other deficiencies as well.
	No, man.
	And this is what started all the sharing and the sharing of information and what got us the naked body scanners.
	Yeah, that was good.
	Not good times.
	And then you have another level, take it to another level during the arguments.
	And I could have put a whole section together from O'Reilly and all these right-wing guys and a lot of left-wing guys saying how great torture was.
	But then we have one of the biggest proponents of torture, which is Monica Crowley.
	And she leverages the crotch bomber with the most idiotic thing you can imagine.
	That is escalating the drone attacks in Afghanistan, Pakistan, and now Yemen.
	I've given him credit for that.
	But on the other hand, closing Gitmo, shutting down enhanced interrogation techniques like waterboarding, which could have extracted more information out of this Nigerian terrorist.
	Those kinds of NIC signals actually, I think, are undermining the effort.
	Drink, slave!
	Drink, you!
	So she says that we could have gotten more information from this idiot who was a stage actor, apparently.
	Yeah.
	I mean, it was just like...
	And, of course, then she also talks about shutting down Gitmo, which I have a lot of clips.
	Oh, he's shutting down Gitmo.
	Hey, he didn't shut down Gitmo, you idiots.
	Can we...
	Do you want to space these out over the show so we get some actual stuff in?
	Or do you want to do all...
	Do you have, like, a one big wad you want to blow on us here?
	Yeah.
	I would like to get two out and then we'll come back to it after the other segment.
	I do want to get the swine flu out of the way.
	We have to remember, this was almost five years ago.
	And we had a jingle for it, in fact.
	Here it is.
	This was indeed, this is even before, this is around the time that I met Miss Mickey when I had the swine flu.
	Right.
	And we were discussing, we got really into it.
	You found some PowerPoints that showed that these drug companies are full of crap.
	Well, no, that vaccinations, vaccines, which they're indemnified for, that's in all the PowerPoint presentations, the financial presentations.
	This is how they're going to make their money.
	And the key to success was lobbying the U.S. government to make them not liable for anything bad that happens.
	And so the news media cranked it up with all kinds of stuff.
	So to start with, I got three clips and one of them is just weird.
	But Stop Spreading Germs is the classic.
	When it comes to fighting flu viruses like 2009 H1N1, there are several steps you can take.
	Wash your hands and get your flu shot.
	Regularly disinfect surfaces to reduce the spread of germs.
	And perhaps the most important step of all, talk to your friends about doing the same.
	Instead of spreading flu viruses like 2009 H1N1, Let's help spread protection.
	Oh!
	I hadn't heard that one.
	I don't think we played that one on the show.
	I think we did.
	Whatever the case, it was like all the advertisers were in on board.
	It was always 2009 H1N1. It wasn't like...
	No, of course not.
	No, because we had to upgrade it.
	And the reason we got on this, and I want to remind people we do this too, is that we noticed that the World Health Organization had changed the definition of pandemic.
	That's right.
	Specifically for this scam that was coming in out of the blue.
	Are you doing this from, you have notes, don't you?
	You're not doing this from numbers.
	No, no, I just, I listen to a lot of clips.
	You're amazing.
	Anyway, so that, and then we had this woman that was running the WHO who was this idiot woman from Hong Kong.
	Was it Cho?
	It was Cho or Cha or something, but she spoke like Miss Swan on the old...
	What happened to her?
	I'm going to look her up while you're doing this.
	Miss Swan?
	Not her, no.
	No, well, I think it was Cho.
	What happened to her?
	Where did she go?
	I don't know.
	She disappeared, I think.
	And we found out that some of the researchers who had looked at the pandemic were on board with the vaccine companies.
	Remember that?
	Oh, yeah.
	This is one of the most corrupt examples of what's wrong with the news media and the country at large.
	I've ever seen.
	It was like playing professional baseball with a T. Chan.
	Just put the baseball of Chan, right?
	So let's play number two.
	So the news media got in on this, and they had to do something.
	So we got swine flu masks boosters.
	Today, State School Chief Jack O'Connell announced that two federal grants are paying for 23 million masks and gloves for California schools.
	Pleasanton Unified just received its shipment this week.
	School officials say they will use them on a case-by-case basis.
	It's another level of protection for everybody, and it certainly raises people's comfort levels.
	I guess that's good.
	I mean, you know, because they could spread it to other kids.
	Schools encourage kids to wash their hands frequently and use sanitizers, and health care workers hope parents are proactive in getting their children vaccinated.
	Even though the Centers for Disease Control says fewer states are reporting widespread H1N1 cases, physicians say it's likely there could be a spike in January.
	They want to remind parents that if a child has received the H1N1 vaccine and is under 10 years old, the child needs to get a second booster shot 24%.
	21 days later.
	Load them up!
	Load those kids up with all kinds of groovy stuff.
	And of course, we have plenty of examples of versions of the flu vaccine giving kids narcolepsy in Norway.
	Admitted fact!
	Fact!
	So anyway, so this got to the point where when I heard this clip, which is the Words of the Year clip, it was like, wait a minute, I can't even remember this at all.
	It was like you couldn't remember that ad, which we did play.
	But this one, we played this too, and you go...
	Now, when you think of Words of the Year, you usually...
	If I said, you know, these are the new words in the dictionary, they tend to be like Google.
	What year?
	This would be 2009.
	So we had words of the year.
	Okay, yeah.
	Well, the one that they cited at the very end of this report...
	Podcast.
	Oh, no, that was 2005.
	Well, whatever.
	Anyway, you hear this and then you're going to do the same thing out here.
	I can barely remember that this was a word or phrase of the year.
	It's like bull crap.
	Well, technology is all the talk these days.
	Literally, it's the focus of this year's survey on the number one word of the decade.
	Some of the runners-up include 9-11, blog, green, text, war on terror and Wi-Fi.
	But the winner...
	Wi-Fi.
	Is Google.
	The number one word of 2009 was tweet.
	And the most creative word of 2009 was Dracula sneeze, as in sneezing into your elbow.
	Oh!
	Dracula sneeze.
	That's funny, because I was going to bring that up, that we all had to relearn how to sneeze into our elbow, because we weren't sneezing right.
	You're not doing it right, slave.
	Sneeze into your elbow.
	And I see people doing that, grown-ups.
	I'm like...
	Are you an idiot?
	Get a hanky.
	Sneeze.
	Dracula sneeze.
	Has you ever heard anyone say that ever?
	No.
	Of course not.
	You know what it's called?
	Sneeze into your elbow.
	It's not called Dracula sneeze.
	Yeah.
	Get with it.
	John, you're right.
	I do not remember the clip.
	I don't remember the words.
	I certainly don't remember the clip, Dracula Sneeze.
	This shows you.
	This is exactly what it is.
	We are living in 1984 and Brave New World.
	These are the telescreens telling us whatever we're meant to believe.
	That's why I enjoyed getting some of these clips from 2009.
	That is funny.
	It was like, oh, oh, right.
	Well, can I then take you, can you flash forward to April 2013?
	And we're going to come back tomorrow.
	That is flashing forward since that's going to be tomorrow.
	Tomorrow, yes.
	Well, because the president...
	April Fool's Day.
	Please tell me you're not going to do one of those lame-ass jokes.
	I forgot about it.
	Now I think I can.
	You're famous for doing them, and they suck.
	Yeah, they really suck.
	But we've got to get a month.
	And we might as well just go ahead and grab April, because listen to what the President has proclaimed April.
	And this, I can't believe this is all coming.
	I thought, you know, you have like, the month belongs to one thing, one cause.
	Oh, ha!
	What planet are you from?
	Alright, presidential proclamation.
	April, National Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month.
	Okay.
	Oh, wait.
	April, by presidential proclamation, National Child Abuse Prevention Month.
	And by the way, it's okay in March or May.
	Just don't do it in April.
	April, by presidential proclamation, National Financial Capability Month.
	I've got to read you this one.
	All Americans deserve the chance to turn their hard work into a decent living for their families and a bright future for their children.
	Seizing that opportunity takes more than drive and initiative.
	It also requires smart financial planning.
	During National Financial Capability Month, we recommit to empowering individuals and families with the knowledge and tools they need to get ahead in today's economy.
	My administration is dedicated to helping people make sound decisions in the marketplace.
	Last year we partnered with businesses and community leaders, it's called fascism, to roll out new public and private commitments to increase financial literacy.
	Are these people insane with this?
	Alright, but that's not it, John.
	No, no, no.
	No, I thought that would be it.
	No, no.
	You can't have a month for one thing than another.
	No, it is National Donate Life Month.
	What?
	Today, more than 115,000 men, women, and children are on the waiting list for an organ transplant.
	The president wants you to sign up to give away some of your bits?
	But it doesn't stop there, no!
	It's, by presidential proclamation, National Cancer Control Month.
	Now, this is my favorite, because we've given up on trying to cure cancer.
	No, no.
	We're just trying to control it.
	We're trying to control your illness.
	This is so blatant in your face, National Cancer Control Month.
	What does that even mean?
	And by the way, this is all bullcrap because every single American knows it is not National Cancer Control Month.
	It is not Donate Life Month.
	It is not Financial Capability Month or Child Abuse Prevention Month or National Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month.
	No way, bitches.
	It is...
	Welcome to Spikes Ford Truck Month.
	Ram Truck Month reminds us that focus and dedication...
	It's Truck Month!
	At Toyota of Northwest Arkansas.
	With discounts so big, think how low your payments will be.
	Get eight grand off.
	That's right, it's Truck Month!
	Probably more Truck Month than the other ones.
	But it's Ford Truck Month, or is it Ram Truck Month, or is it Toyota Truck Month?
	Well, if it's Truck Month, what else is it?
	No, because they're all claiming it's their own Truck Month.
	Oh.
	So, you know, if you wanted to take this to an extreme, you could do the weeks.
	Week 25 is?
	They have, like, tons and tons of these weeks of this and weeks of that.
	I don't think the president does weeks.
	I think he only does months.
	No, the president, yeah, but they do weeks and the states do weeks.
	It's a lot of weeks.
	And they get read into the congressional record.
	They do.
	And days do, too.
	Specific days.
	Did you hear about this blow-up about the TED videos?
	Did you hear about this?
	I had a clip on this.
	We didn't play it, but yeah, I know all about it.
	Oh, I didn't know.
	I can dig up that clip.
	We can play it on the next show.
	It's quite entertaining.
	Yeah, so, well, I'll just say, I have it in the show notes if people want to check it out, but these two speakers at a TEDx in the UK, Graham Hancock and Rupert Sheldrake, their videos were removed, censored by TED. Oh, this is a different story.
	It's a similar story, but it's different.
	Oh, okay, no, and the reason why is because they were not scientific.
	It was pseudoscience.
	That's what old Ted is, is pseudoscience.
	Thank you.
	That's exactly what Miss Mickey said.
	But so, you know, one guy's like, he was talking about, he did some research into intuition and consciousness, and he was saying that, you know, it appears that animals and humans can feel when they're being watched, which probably comes from predatory information.
	for predators watching.
	And if you have four people calling you, a human being can accurately predict who's calling 45% of the time, which is above chance.
	Yeah, I do that.
	Right.
	But this, of course, does not compute with scientists.
	So because of this, these videos were flagged and now all this stuff about Ted is...
	There's some other reason for this, because Ted's dead now.
	Well, I think there's...
	First of all, anyone could start one of these, but Ted has the brand.
	But I also think, John, that Ted has gone overboard.
	They've become a cult.
	Yeah, I've got to dig up that clip and play it on the next show that I have.
	One of the guys was kicked out.
	Yeah, no, is that the guy who was on Joe Rogan?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I saw that interview.
	I have it in the show, and I was like 15 minutes, and they had to stay in the Hyatt with a partner for a week, and he couldn't leave.
	Yeah, right.
	You had to stay with somebody in a hotel.
	The whole thing was annoying, and you got paid nothing.
	Zero.
	Which was the thing that one of the people said, why don't you go try to get the Ted speech?
	And I know Chris Anderson, and I probably could, but I don't really have anything to say.
	Ted Anderson?
	He sounds like a jerk.
	Chris Anderson.
	Whatever.
	He's Ted Anderson.
	Ted Anderson.
	Ted Anderson.
	That's my name to show after myself.
	He's such a jerk.
	He named the whole thing after him.
	But I think it's a bad policy to speak for free.
	Of course it's a bad policy.
	Unless you pay it to a charity or it's a friend of yours and it's something you're trying to help with.
	But generally speaking, it cheapens the whole brand for everybody.
	It's terrible.
	And this kid was supposed to be a TED fellow.
	And he got in his information packet, it had instructions on how to talk to a billionaire.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I'd love to get a hold of that, by the way.
	Oh!
	Oh!
	But I... I always refer to him as Sir.
	Tell me the...
	You said you know Chris, Ted.
	Is he a nice guy?
	He seems like a douche.
	He is a...
	He's not a douche.
	He's actually a nice guy, but he is...
	You never hear this, so I might as well mention it.
	He's cheap.
	And...
	He used to run the Mac Attic, I think, or one of those Macintosh.
	He ran, it was like one of the future computing or some publishing house that had a bunch of magazines, including the Macintosh competitor, Mac user.
	But everything was, it was all done on a low budget.
	It's like it was just everything.
	He didn't pay as much as everybody else.
	It was cheap, and he made all the money.
	He did very well.
	And then he could buy Ted.
	He bought Ted from the Warman guy and then took it over because he could see the commercial possibilities, which the guy is a genius at that.
	And then he managed, because it was such a high-end thing, he knew he could get everyone to speak for free and then cow him into this bull crap where you're a fellow.
	You get to say you're a Ted fellow, which means nothing.
	Our nights mean more than that.
	Thank you.
	Thank you.
	At least you get a ring out of the deal and a pin.
	Yeah, and a cool pin.
	But anyway...
	And to protect her up.
	That's not even a club.
	Nobody can identify.
	It's just not good.
	But anyway, he's a nice guy.
	Just as a person.
	Future publishing was what he found.
	Yeah, future publishing.
	Right.
	He was born in Pakistan.
	He's Al-Qaeda.
	He's got a British accent.
	I think he's MI6. Spent most of his early life in Pakistan, India, Afghanistan.
	Uh-huh.
	Studied at a boarding school in the Himalayan mountains.
	This guy is a total spook.
	It could be.
	Okay, I got a letter I got to read.
	Uh-oh.
	This came in from Dennis, one of our producers.
	And I have to read this because there's more information in here.
	There's new information.
	Oh, hold on, hold on.
	We have a jingle for that somewhere.
	Here it is.
	I've got information, man.
	New shit has come to light.
	Exactly.
	As a retired postal worker, I wanted to thank you for your explanation of the current postal crisis.
	You're 100% correct, especially about it being a pre-funding problem.
	And I want to remind people that when you see a news analyst, a pundit, or anybody else slamming the post office, you should hear the douchebag jingle in your head.
	And it sounds like this.
	Douchebag.
	No other federal agency, he says, is required to pre-fund none because the money would come from the federal budget, i.e.
	taxpayers, whereas the USPS is required to do it because the money comes strictly from operational income, free money for the federal government.
	No private corporation is required to do it because it would cripple the economy.
	Many people still do not understand that the Postal Service receives no taxpayer money.
	And most people don't realize that for the past 30 years or more, when the Post Office or the Postal Service did end a year in the black, the federal government would skim the money into the Federal General Fund.
	I didn't know that either.
	Here's something you may not realize.
	When a postal worker retires, all connections with the USPS are cut.
	His or her retirement is administered by the Office of Personnel Management, just like any other federal employee.
	To the best of my knowledge, there is no separate pool of money that he or her pension money comes from, other than the general fund for all...
	All federal employees.
	Therefore, this pre-funding money paid by the USPS is probably available for OPM to use over the broad spectrum of all federal retirees.
	Wow.
	This is the biggest scam being perpetrated on the American public, this post office nonsense, the meme so that the United Postal Service and Federal Express can take over the business, and then all the laws that prevent postal crimes are off the books.
	They're gone.
	They don't need it anymore.
	This is – and it's unbelievable to me that nobody wants to pay any attention to it.
	Oh, the post office.
	Who uses the post office?
	We elites don't need such things.
	We've got Federal Express.
	Red.
	Thank you.
	you.
	Anyway, a good letter from Dennis.
	We saw our associate producer mail carrier yesterday bounding down Travis Heights Boulevard, smiling.
	And?
	Yeah, he's like, hey, how you doing?
	Here's your mail.
	Well, if you listen to today's show, he'll be pleased.
	And he said, I loved it when you did that whole Anderson pooper underwater.
	That was a hit, apparently.
	I knew that.
	As soon as I heard the clip, I said, Adam can copy this.
	Crazy.
	But I was thinking later that I should have been underwater with Anderson.
	Maybe I could piece together a bunch of them.
	I bet you I could be doing a little interview with Anderson underwater.
	So what do you think of that crocodile there, Anderson?
	What do you think of that croc?
	I can almost touch him.
	Stop, stop, stop.
	We should not be doing this.
	That's a nice letter.
	Oh, by the way, Soledad finally got her walking papers.
	Yeah.
	And you know who they replaced her with?
	Soledad O'Brien, John and I both know, she did the morning program on the CNNs over there, and she got kicked out with one of those, well, I'm going to be doing special shows.
	Yeah, that's the old one.
	Yes, we're taking a short break.
	Hiatus?
	Hiatus, and I will be doing specials.
	I've been promoted.
	I've been promoted.
	I have her...
	Actually, if you're interested, I have it right here.
	I have her goodbye, which was kind of sad, actually.
	I thought...
	Maybe you should play her out.
	What I found interesting is her replacement is Kate Baldwin.
	Ooh!
	Kate Baldwin?
	Yeah, also known as Catherine Jean.
	Kate Baldwin.
	And she...
	At first I'm like, okay, this is nothing, blah, blah, blah.
	And then I see, oh, she's married to Michael D. Gershenson.
	Of the Carlisle Group.
	Oh!
	Yeah.
	Mr.
	Gershenson has been involved with the execution...
	Of over 40 transactions with all in capitalization exceeding $2 billion and the asset management of Carlyle's portfolio of retail and industrial assets.
	That's an instant analyst.
	Prior to joining Carlyle, Mr.
	Gershenson was with Deutsche Bank Alex Brown's Mergers, Acquisition, and Corporate Advisory Group in New York where he specialized in real estate transactions.
	And he actually specializes in Boston and Texas.
	But when you read that, it's like, really?
	Both couples, by the way, are recent converts to the Jewish faith.
	That's interesting.
	They got Zucker as a boss.
	They got to do something.
	Isn't that kind of weird?
	Yeah, it's very weird for adults to...
	I can see where if you married someone of a different faith, where you converted that faith, but that they both converted to a different faith...
	Yeah, that's pretty weird.
	He's like, what?
	How did this happen and why?
	That's very strange.
	I have an idea, honey.
	What?
	I think we should go Jewish.
	What?
	What are you talking about?
	Yeah, yeah, the both of us.
	You're an Episcopalian.
	I think she's from Jersey or something.
	That's weird, though, isn't it?
	It's odd.
	I'd like to know more about that.
	I'll have to file that under...
	There's a local cult they have to join.
	Who knows?
	Well, that has to go, you know, under the same heading as why Austin.
	You know?
	Yeah, why Austin?
	Here, she's signing off crying.
	Let me see if it's...
	Oh, that may have removed this video.
	Oh, no, here it comes.
	This is Soledad O'Brien signing off claiming facts matter.
	Let's see if we can...
	Hold on a second.
	Yeah.
	I got it here.
	So I think if I've learned anything over the past year, it's that facts matter, and we shouldn't be afraid to have tough and honest.
	You're playing over the best part!
	No, play it after she begins.
	All right.
	After that, not immediately, right?
	So I think if I've learned anything over the past year, it's that facts matter, and we shouldn't be afraid to have tough and honest conversations, and maybe even argue a little bit when there's a lot at stake.
	And yes, Governor Sununu, I am talking to you.
	Up next for me, I'm going to focus on the 25 girls that we serve.
	We send girls to college at my foundation.
	She's going to focus on her foundation, John.
	Oh, my God.
	Faces from jobs to poverty and focusing on the people who have stories to tell in this country.
	And often those stories don't get told.
	Oh, my God.
	I mean, what's worse?
	What's worse is saying, I'm going to focus on my foundation.
	Oh, man.
	She must have really screwed up.
	Yeah, that's like, well, at the worst, the number one is I want to spend more time with my family.
	Oh, that's after a sex scandal.
	That's when that works.
	Yeah, and then you got the other, we should probably come with a canonical list of excuses for you.
	Yes!
	Now you got fired slash quit.
	Oh, this is...
	Okay, so...
	Alright, so focus...
	The worst is like, yeah, I want to spend more time with my family.
	Now, but if you really have balls, you know, health issues.
	You throw in a health issues thing.
	Everyone has health issues.
	I'm getting old.
	That's a health issue right there.
	I've got health issues.
	Yeah.
	So that's one.
	What else have I heard you use?
	The foundation is pretty good.
	The foundation is good.
	I want to spend more time with my family.
	I've got health issues.
	I've always wanted to write a book.
	I've always wanted to write a book.
	That's a classic, right?
	I always wanted to write a book.
	I always wanted to learn Morse code.
	We're down to the bottom.
	That would be me.
	Learn Morse code.
	It's funny because there was some big contesting going on over the weekend here on the 20 and 40 meters.
	So I'll get into code and some guy will reply and I'm all happy because I'm slow.
	I got a slow fist, as we call it.
	This is a very sexual thing, this Morse code.
	So I have a very slow fist.
	Yeah.
	Oh, God.
	And, you know, we're QSOing.
	And then the guy's like, yeah, I'm 73 and retired.
	I'm like, Jesus Christ.
	Those are those codgers.
	Yeah, it's like, oh, there's got to be some hip dudes walking around.
	Yeah, there's plenty.
	Yeah, but they're not on the CBS. We're going to make it.
	We are the next generation.
	The juggernaut of Hamdom.
	Mm-hmm.
	I agree.
	And, you know, I'll tell you.
	And I look at that Ham Nation show.
	Screw those guys, man.
	That's boring.
	It's like worse.
	You take the oldest boring dudes and you put an Icon logo on their head.
	The whole show was sponsored by Icon, which is, you know, good radios.
	But, jeez, there's no content because of it.
	There's no content in the show.
	Because it all has to be, oh, Boy Scouts of America brought to you by Icon.
	And I love them.
	They sent me an Icon radio when I was in exile.
	Fantastic.
	But it's like there's other things.
	It's a giant commercial.
	The one thing I care about watching.
	Well, this is the reason that our model is the model.
	If you want to actually get down to brass tacks.
	Yeah, and it really is the model because, man, does it keep us on our toes.
	We don't wake up one day and all of a sudden there's some Carlisle Group's babe trophy wife taking over your spot.
	No, we have to be on the money every single show, because if not, the money dries up immediately.
	Right, which apparently does even when we do good work.
	But you know what I'm saying.
	It's like, over time, we're getting by.
	I was watching Charlie Rose the other day, and the CEO of...
	This is an interesting clip.
	The CEO of U.S. Airways, you know, they just merged with an American, and he's going to be the new boss.
	He's going to be the boss of the biggest airline conglomerate there is.
	Now, this is the U.S. Airways guy, right?
	Not the American.
	Yeah, the U.S. Airways guy.
	This seems like a nice enough guy, but he's a little bit full of himself.
	But he made this interesting comment that I was watching, and I said, trains good, planes bad...
	I'll give you my conclusion after you listen to this, but play the airline's taxed clip.
	Is the airline sector a huge part of our economy?
	It's enormous.
	Is it really?
	Yeah, something on the order of one out of eight jobs is related somehow to the U.S. commercial aviation business.
	Just think about how important it is to all our daily lives.
	Yeah.
	It's an incredibly important part of the U.S. economy.
	One that we don't think we get enough appreciation for in terms of the way we're taxed, for example.
	We're taxed at some 20% of the ticket you buy in general goes to federal taxes and fees.
	That's about the same.
	That's actually higher than you see on cigarettes or liquor.
	So we feel we're taxed much like a vice.
	Now, bad slave.
	You can't fly.
	You're getting high.
	Literally.
	This is like, and now that I, as soon as I heard this, I said, tax like a vice.
	Why are they doing this?
	And then I thought about the car rental.
	When you rent a car nowadays, this wasn't the case 20 years ago, but today...
	It's like $30 a day, and then the bill is $69.
	Yeah, it's all taxes on top of it, yeah.
	It's over 50% of it's taxed, and this is the tax on the...
	Now, so the proverbial question would be, or the rhetorical question is, I thought all these government guys were pro-business.
	There's nothing more pro-business than airlines, and then you land somewhere, and you get in a car, and you drive to a meeting, or you do something in another town.
	You've got to fly, you've got to drive if you're doing business.
	And so if everyone's so pro-business, why are they taxing both the car rentals and the airlines like a vice?
	Well, those are his words, of course.
	I liked it.
	I like it, too.
	But also, I'm getting taxed 30%.
	I mean, just living, I'm getting taxed like a vice.
	Which is probably correct.
	Right.
	It's unbelievable.
	And then, of course, you have the tax apologists.
	Oh, we need to tax more.
	I mean, you got the Buffetts and the Gateses, and this is why, I'll just say it one more time, out of the blue, here it comes.
	Wealth tax.
	We need a wealth tax.
	Now, you heard about the IMF paper?
	We knew this, of course, because we could already deduce this.
	We played clips of Christina Douchebag, Lagarde, about the...
	It was like $30 per ton, a metric ton of carbon.
	We knew what the carbon tax would be.
	Oh, right.
	They had the numbers, yeah.
	Right.
	We had the numbers.
	We had the announcements.
	So now they have a paper out saying the IMF, with their research paper, says that it probably should be about $1.33 per gallon should be taxed.
	Yeah, I know.
	Isn't that great?
	Now, what do we pay now?
	About 50 cents a gallon in tax?
	Or is it more?
	On car?
	On gasoline?
	Yeah.
	I don't know.
	I'd have to look it up.
	It's a lot.
	But on top of that...
	It's not as much as Europe pays.
	And they put up with it.
	And then they have their bank accounts.
	Let me take some money from your bank account.
	Now, there's a name for this.
	The Canadian bloggers...
	Have you seen this?
	This is crazy, man.
	Okay, so here it is.
	The 2013 budget in Canada.
	And here we have a depositor.
	This is the definition of a depositor now in Canada.
	Is an unsecured creditor to the bank.
	The Canadian government presented its position to be one of shielding the...
	Oh, that's rich.
	Yeah, yeah.
	The phrase, rapid conversion of certain bank liabilities into regulatory capital, which would be known as a bail-in.
	So, this is what happened in Cyprus, is a bail-in.
	And by the way, if you receive a...
	It hasn't happened in the United States, but I'm hearing people in the UK who have received...
	I can have the language for you, actually.
	Have received notices from their bank, and they talk about...
	I have to come up with...
	This is a good word, because it could be a title for the show.
	Um...
	Basically, if they're forced to recapitalize, let me find the term for it, they're changing the terms on your account, that they can then basically steal that money.
	And this is happening all over Europe.
	People are receiving, and the bank that's doing it first is Santander, which is Spanish.
	Right.
	Well, Jim Rogers, I have a little clip if you want to play, Jim Rogers on Cypress Banks discusses, this is one of these famous investors who's, you know, very conservative.
	He lives in Singapore, right?
	He moved out a while ago.
	I think he moved out of Singapore to some other weird place.
	Oh, Singapore, so he's moved to the new Singapore.
	Or whatever, yeah.
	All right, just in the intro or just go?
	No, just play that and then we'll go back to the discussion.
	Okay.
	It's going to happen.
	Of course it's going to happen, Carl.
	Now the IMF has condoned it.
	The EU has condoned it.
	It's politicians who are telling you it's a special case.
	Oh, don't worry, don't worry, don't worry.
	Carl, what more do you need to know when politicians are saying you don't have to worry, it's a special case?
	Please, you better hurry.
	You better run for the hills.
	I'm doing it anyway.
	That doesn't mean I'm right.
	But I want to make sure that I don't get trapped.
	I mean, think of all the poor souls who just thought they had a simple bank account.
	Now they find out that they are making a contribution.
	That's what it's called, Carl.
	A contribution to the stability of Cyprus.
	I mean, it's all of these politicians.
	Rule number one, Jim, they say, is don't lose money.
	Rule number two is look back at rule number one.
	Well, rule number three is don't trust any government.
	Carl, if you're going to listen to government, you're going to go bankrupt very quickly.
	Okay, here is the note from...
	And, of course, this is kind of his...
	Jim Rogers has been saying this for a while.
	Yeah, he unfortunately is a perpetual bear.
	Santander sends out a note, and this is just...
	Really just received by people in the UK. Your money, this is section 1B of what we would call fly crap, so it's very, very fine print.
	Any money held for you in an account with Santander UK PLC will be held in its capacity as a bank and not as a trustee.
	In accordance with FSA requirements, that's their regulatory oversight douchebags, we are obliged to notify you that the client money rules on money do not apply to a banking consolidation directive, also known as a BCD, We're good to go.
	In other words, if we need to get bailed out and the government says here is a banking consolidation directive, they will take your money, which is held as a bank and not as a trustee of your money.
	In fact, you don't even own your money.
	If you really look at it objectively, you've given your money to the bank and you just have a login screen.
	All you got was a password, you idiot.
	And thanks for the consideration, my friend.
	I mean, are they trying to force a run on the banks, John?
	I mean, is this some huge Bitcoin conspiracy?
	I mean, come on.
	Well, if I was going to look at the conspiracy side of this, I would say this is an attempt to get only European.
	I would suspect, especially with Christine Lagarde somehow in the deal, I would suspect that this has to do with us.
	And this is another, you know, we've been propping up our own stock market and the banks and everything else by essentially shaking the trees of other nations and saying, look, look, you're going to lose all your money over there.
	Bring it over here.
	We got stocks.
	There's good deals on some stocks and we got banks that are safe and they're insured by the FDIC. And so, and And there is a flow right now, which is why the euro is going down and the dollar is going up.
	There is an inward flow of cash into the United States, and I would suspect that this is all part of a grand scheme, which benefits us, because we're not going to have this situation.
	There won't be any stories about, I mean, there'll be the one or two, and the phone call will come in.
	Why did you make that?
	That's bullshit.
	Wait a minute.
	Tell me, who's making this phone call?
	Someone.
	To whom?
	To the reporter who says that this could happen here.
	Oh, okay.
	Oh, yeah, no.
	Shh.
	Ixnay on the Anchor on Bay.
	Shh.
	It can't happen here because we want to make it look like we're ultra-safe.
	What to be on the lookout for are stories, just the opposite kind of story, where it makes us look like we're pristine.
	We're the place you should put your money.
	Our banks would never do that.
	Besides, we're insured by the FDIC for all kinds of money, and you can just have different accounts.
	If you have a million dollars, put $100,000 here, $100,000 there.
	Spread it around.
	It's actually $250,000.
	Remember that got upped?
	Yes, $250,000.
	But spread it around.
	Put it in a bunch of different banks, which Jim Rogers also advocated.
	Well, this, by the way, is my Israeli friends.
	Nay, I should say my Jewish friends.
	That would be more accurate.
	In Amsterdam, taught me 20 years, almost 30 years ago, always have your money in different banks in different countries.
	Of course, I never listened to them.
	But I've never had enough like, hey, can I put my 10 euros here?
	So anyway, that is a good policy.
	But right now, they're shaking the trees because you don't want your money in any European bank.
	You went like Mr.
	Oil did.
	He had to steal his own money from the bank to get out of town.
	But he got it.
	He got it before all that.
	And he's going to end up, I guarantee, before all is said and done, it'll be scattered around American banks.
	This is why we're so good at this stuff.
	I admire these kinds of plays.
	I'm assuring you that this is what's going on.
	All right, talk.
	This is a great day for America.
	We're going to get money from everywhere.
	It's going to boost our crappy economy.
	Bring your money here.
	Bring your huddled masses.
	Bring your tired and your weak dollars and euros and yen and shekels.
	Bring them over here.
	We're safe.
	By the way, just...
	By the by.
	So we've advanced to the next stage of Ms.
	Mickey's green card.
	Oh!
	Yeah, so the next...
	So she's done...
	Yeah, so then update.
	The next stage is now she has her biometric appointment.
	Which is also new in the process.
	But this is another $1,070...
	Now, after all this...
	This is just the same as those airport scams.
	Taxes on a car rental car.
	They're just gouging the public.
	There's all this money going.
	Well, here's what I wanted to say about that.
	So if you look at truly the American dream, right?
	And I know, we all know it's mac and cheese, according to President Obama, and just getting by and retiring with some dignity and adding some tuna to your mac and cheese.
	And so your kids can have a better life.
	Whatever.
	But it used to be, you're huddled masses, you come to Ellis Island, there you get registered, and then you come in, and if you were just willing to pound the pavement, there's so many proverbs, so many sayings about the American dream, that you could be like that guy, you could have that house, you could drive that car, you could have, this is not my beautiful wife, this is not my beautiful car, how did I get here?
	So you can have all that.
	But what's happened is because of this Now Department of Homeland Security, no wonder we have illegals.
	I know people who have gotten married, they're in love, they're in Texas, and their spouse, they want to go through the green card, but they can't because it's a minimum of $7,000.
	That's just for paperwork.
	Well, that's with a crappy lawyer who will charge you like $1,500.
	But it's every single stage.
	And they're laughing at you like, oh, $420.
	Pfft!
	See if they notice the 420.
	Why does it take $1,000, more than $1,000 to review a form that I filled out?
	Why does it take another $1,000 to look at the paperwork that I've supplied to support that?
	I mean, why?
	I mean, that is, it takes someone who works...
	Somebody's making some good money.
	Right, but so no wonder people, if you have a family of five, and, you know, and it's all individual paperwork, you can't, like, put, oh, and I've got these three kids.
	No, no.
	Each kid has the forms, each kid has the paperwork, each kid has the check you've got to sign.
	So you want to bring your family over.
	No one has $20,000.
	That's why they're coming in illegally.
	I think a lot of people, like, if we just make it, you know, they don't mind paperwork, but the money, it's crazy, John.
	It's crazy.
	There's something, and no one's talking about this.
	We are.
	Well, thank you.
	That's what we do.
	And we're talking about it because it hurts.
	Well, it hurts you, that's for sure.
	Yeah, but you know the...
	It hurts me, too, on some level.
	Oh, jeez.
	I'm going to show us food by donating to no agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh, yeah, that'd be fabulous.
	Yeah, I do what you want.
	In the morning.
	We have a lot of people to thank, and we want to thank everyone who helped us celebrate the 500th show.
	It's non-trivial.
	It's also nice that if you see all the tweets and the emails, and people are saying some really beautiful things, and I mean, you usually don't get any of the nasty ones.
	Do you get any of the good ones?
	I get a few.
	I get some of the nasty ones.
	They say, it usually starts off, pass this to Adam.
	Right.
	Can I read you a quick one from Ty?
	Yeah, play.
	Play.
	Adam, I'm a douchebag since episode one.
	In my defense, I quit listening 15 minutes into the show because I thought it was dumb.
	Then John canceled Cranky Geeks.
	Yes, I'll blame him for a decision probably he didn't make.
	And I found myself needing more John.
	So I returned to No Agenda and realized it was the best podcast in the universe, and I was broke.
	The show has been absolutely amazing, and I told myself I would donate as soon as I paid off my credit cards.
	In the spirit of just getting by, that is nowhere close to the amount of the following product's current market value.
	And he sent us an Amazon gift coupon code for a lovely mac and cheese meal, microwavable, By Kraft.
	The Kraft original macaroni and cheese microwavable.
	So I've redeemed the code and I've ordered this $12.91.
	And I will await either my traveling to Northern California or your traveling to Texas for me to make this wonderful gift.
	That's nice.
	Yeah.
	Please.
	Yeah, a lot of people are...
	Yeah, but let's not make it...
	I wonder how long it does...
	You know, we still have the problem with that 15 minutes.
	You know, that's why I think these discs will help.
	Yeah, I hope so.
	Although, we need new discs that don't say January.
	It looks kind of stupid now.
	Yeah, we've got to get the disc guided.
	Yeah.
	NoagendaCD.com.
	There's tons of little good snippets there that you can send to people.
	Just little quick bits and bites of cool...
	Zingers.
	Blurbs.
	So let's thank some people.
	Bernie Ataman, Hinton, Iowa.
	One, two, three, four, five.
	In the morning on the 500th, congrats and happy Easter, he says.
	Meanwhile, we've got an anonymous for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
	And he just says, happy 500.
	Anonymous for 100.
	A lot of anonymous today.
	Well, these are the spooks.
	The spooks come out.
	Yeah, we get a lot of spooks listening to the show, which is a term we probably shouldn't use.
	No, no, no, because I'm reliably informed, it's an okay term.
	Okay, good.
	And you would be reliable.
	I would be reliably informed.
	Yeah, you can say spook.
	It's okay.
	Sir David Koss.
	I think a lot of them think it's cool.
	Sir David Koss of Kossome.com.
	K-O-S-S-O-M-E. $100.
	He had some problems in the hospital.
	Give him another car along with Tyler Oglesby of West Columbus, Texas.
	$99.99.
	All right.
	You've got karma.
	Also Peter McConnell in Stockholm, New Jersey, but he's actually in Suzhou, China.
	And I want some reports.
	What's going on?
	Because, you know, you're in China, you see a lot of stuff, there's some stories going around.
	I was listening to the Forbidden China News, which is just hard to watch because of all the subtitles.
	But they apparently have lost almost 50% of all the rivers in China have been moved, blocked, they've been dried out.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Why?
	Because they moved them so they could make dams or they could build something over here and over there.
	Like 50% of all the rivers are dried up and gone.
	That's a big country.
	Yes, and it's a lot of rivers.
	I can't remember the number, but it's like thousands.
	But that's for industry, I presume, that they needed to dump aluminium in and stuff.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Wow.
	Well, you know, that's what you get.
	Den Ha, someone from The Hague.
	Yes, Den Ha.
	8247.
	That's Gene.
	Gene.
	Hi, Gene.
	Roman Andrusko in Bradford, Ontario, 75.
	Louis Coulomb.
	How is that pronounced?
	That's Coulomb.
	I think it's Coulomb.
	This is not a typical Dutch name.
	He's from Rijswijk, which is the Netherlands.
	Coulomb is a famous...
	It's actually a metric.
	Coulombs.
	Coulombs.
	I can't for some reason.
	Is that an atmospheric metric?
	It's electrical.
	Like columnist?
	Columnist clouds?
	No, no, no.
	No, this is electrical.
	I mean, you might as well call your kid Ohm.
	Yeah.
	Anyway.
	69!
	69, dude!
	Hello, my name is Mike Rofarad.
	Sir, exactly.
	Sir Mike Rofarad, no, Nikolichuk in Saskatoon, the Paris of Canada.
	And he says, happy 500 jerks.
	This is truly the best podcast in the universe.
	Keep it wonderful working.
	Here's another...
	Here's to another 500.
	6969.
	Anthony Garlinger in Elmhurst, Illinois.
	Nate Wilson in Charleston, South Carolina.
	Gorgeous place.
	I do like what Anthony said.
	He said, Heil, guardians of reality!
	Oh, that's right.
	We're the Guardians of Reality.
	Well, you have to add the Heil to it.
	Heil.
	Heil.
	Heil, Guardians of Reality.
	As I just said, Nate Wilson, Craig Kuttner in Norwalk, Connecticut.
	James Green in Mesquite, Texas.
	We got our 69s back.
	Yeah.
	Long-time listener.
	Vitriolic.
	Hair.
	Take this before my wife does.
	That's the attitude.
	There you go.
	Right on.
	Nice.
	Sir Joshua Polson in Ridgefield, Washington.
	Jay Zuckel in Los Angeles, California.
	Robert Johnson, appropriately, in Phoenix, Arizona.
	That's the last one.
	It's nice to see it back, though.
	I didn't expect that.
	Yeah, well, we'll see.
	James Scusen in Redlands, California.
	6449 Ryan Jones in Camp Lejeune, North Carolina.
	Matthew Dropko in Columbus, Ohio, 5555.
	Andrew Bracken in Warlington, Surrey, 5555.
	And we've got, let's see, we have an interesting note.
	He says Bunchy.com.
	Is that his, while cranking away on Bunchy.com?
	B-O-N-C-H-Y? What is that?
	I don't know.
	Check it out while I'm reading.
	Raymond...
	Oh, brother.
	Do I need to help you with a name here?
	Kleinstra.
	I knew it.
	Raymond Kleinstra.
	Drachten.
	Drachten.
	Bunchy is social funding.
	Oh, cool.
	Start funding soon.
	Maybe they'll be funding us.
	Daydream Graphics in South Australia.
	Scott Amato in Davie, Florida.
	And give him some job karma so he can help you out.
	You've got karma.
	Sean Spoken in Fort Worth, Texas.
	That's where all the money really is in Texas.
	That's also where the Tandy Corporation is.
	Yes, Gerald Lofstedt.
	You know that building, those Tandy Towers?
	Yeah.
	Did you know that was hit by one of those weird cyclones that hit Fort Worth?
	And it twisted one of the buildings to the point where they can't tear it down now, and you can't occupy it.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	I didn't know that.
	Yeah, it's like they don't know what to do.
	Huh.
	Gerald Lofstedt in Albuquerque, New Mexico, 5150.
	Interesting note.
	He has an interesting note.
	The other day my wife was watching C-SPAN commenting how that information couldn't be found anywhere else.
	I told her I didn't have to watch because you guys did, clipping out all the good bits.
	I knew it was long past time to donate.
	This is not up to the value you've provided yet, but it is a start, even though much of your science coverage is full of crap.
	Okay.
	It's Sergio Collins in Woodbridge, Virginia.
	Double nickels on the dime.
	And...
	Where am I? Gus Rea in Canyon Court, California.
	Double nickels on the dime.
	He just got a job at the Royal Cruise Company.
	That's interesting.
	Send us information.
	Yes.
	Todd Rathkamp in Rippon, Wisconsin.
	55 Stan Salisbury in Gainesville, Florida.
	54-66.
	Tim Alatori in Pleasant Hill, California.
	Nice little Berg here by where I am.
	I can wave.
	BSC, and he's got a birthday, Matthias Dienelt in Vienna.
	Greetings from Austria!
	Keep doing 500 more shows!
	Exactly.
	Heil Guardians of Reality.
	Angelique Overbeek in Scherpenzeel.
	Okay, Angelique Overbeek in Scherpenzeel.
	I'm the freak from the EU flag.
	Remember that one?
	Don't you remember the flag?
	She sent us a picture.
	She's the woman in a flag and instead of stars there's skulls.
	Was she naked?
	No, but she's wearing a flimsy outfit.
	Oh, well, no.
	Funny, I can't remember that.
	Don't remember the flag of skulls.
	No.
	Send it again, Angelique.
	Send it again.
	Yeah, send it again.
	I have.
	I use it as my screensaver.
	Ha, ha, ha.
	Teresa Fly in Cornersville, Tennessee.
	Thank you both for all you do for us poor slaves.
	Sir AJ Tissier in Normal, Illinois.
	50 bucks.
	And he's been listening since show 100 or earlier.
	Kevin Grant, Vancouver, B.C. Martin Volpreck, Berlin, Deutschland.
	And finally, Sir Greg Brunzel in Kenosha, Wisconsin, all for $50.
	I want to thank them.
	And everybody else who came in with lesser amounts to help us celebrate.
	Show 500, amazing feat.
	Very few people can manage to do something like that, especially with the quality that we've achieved over the years.
	It's amazing that we still like to talk to each other even at all.
	We don't really.
	Well, no.
	Twice a week.
	That's about it.
	That's fine with me.
	Yeah, I'd like to toss in my two cents there and thank you as well for all the people who are on our monthly subscriptions after our recent discussion about this.
	A lot of people up that.
	The more listeners we have who are on some kind of monthly, the better.
	I mean, it's important that we have our one-offs.
	Of course, without executive producers and associate executive producers, there's no show whatsoever.
	But if you possibly can, there's tons of different programs you can sign up to.
	And all of them, of course, count towards your knighthood and other peerage.
	And I wanted to say on that note, in the show notes you will find a No Agenda Peerage map.
	If you have peerage, we'd love to have you sign up to that.
	You can find it at DailySkew.com.
	James Green II congratulates himself.
	He will be celebrating his birthday on the 2nd of April.
	James Skousen turns 31 today, and so does Tim Alatore.
	He turns 33 today, if you can make it any crazier.
	Happy birthday from your Guardians of Reality.
	Heil!
	It's your birthday, yeah!
	That's my new one.
	Heil!
	And we welcome two new titles in our peerage as we've done some peerage review.
	Heil!
	We have Sir A.J. Reistad now moving on to the Baronet of Treasure Valley, Ohio.
	Very proud to have him taking over that protectorate.
	Was it Idaho or Ohio?
	I'm sorry.
	It was Idaho, wasn't it?
	Now you've confused me.
	Can you check it?
	I'm going to check it as we speak.
	You know what?
	Screw it.
	I'm giving him both.
	If there's a Treasure Valley in Ohio, he's got that one too.
	Idaho.
	Maybe I'm wrong.
	And Michael Miller becomes, Sir Michael Miller becomes the Viscount of Marin.
	It's Idaho.
	It's Idaho?
	Sorry.
	So now we have Viscount Michael Miller of Marin, and we have Baronet A.J. Reistat of Treasure Valley.
	And we would like all of the human resources of those protectorates to say hi to them when you see them walking around.
	Yeah, well, it'll be identifiable with a pin.
	We did get a note from one of our big anonymous donors in New York City.
	And there's a couple of notes.
	It's a big note with anonymous, anonymous written all over.
	But I do have to mention a couple of things I wanted from the note.
	It's not that he wants it to read out loud.
	He does ask you a question.
	Would you mind going through your entire list of entertainment industrial complex on this show?
	You.
	I love a comprehensive list to avoid when I make it with my screenwriting career.
	And where does Sean Penn fit in considering he accepted Bill Clinton's bribery money?
	I think he extorted Bill Clinton.
	So I like the guy now.
	I would like to say yes.
	No, I think we both agreed on that.
	There's an extra little tidbit about Bill Clinton and Haiti.
	That popped in today.
	Yeah?
	Yes.
	Congratulations, Heineken.
	$40 million investment by Heineken to upgrade and expand their Haitian brewery, which includes investment in regional programs that will help build the capacity of smallholder farms.
	The announcement was made after Heineken made a $15 million Clinton Global Initiative commitment.
	Oh, so he had to bribe Clinton to get the licenses.
	Uh-huh.
	Yeah.
	Is that unbelievable?
	That guy's too much.
	Yeah.
	It's like, hey, you want a license?
	Hey, get some Haitians.
	They know how to make beer.
	I want to be nice to my CGI. And when Hillary comes around...
	She'll be taken over when I'm done.
	So I saw him on the health thing.
	He just looks terrible.
	Anyway, one more thing from this note.
	He says, one thing in the show is missing, and this is not true, by the way, and we've talked about this before, are solutions.
	You mentioned all these things, but what can the average NA listener do to help thwart the security state The security state walls that are closing in on us.
	Well, first of all, we're not advocates, except I'm an advocate of the wealth tax.
	But besides that, we're, generally speaking, we're just news analysts.
	And we don't really necessarily have solutions, except knowledge is power.
	Buy seeds and ammo and shortwave radios!
	If we were with those other guys, that's what we'd be.
	Buy seeds!
	There's your solution.
	Buy overpriced seeds!
	Heirloom seeds.
	Buy Bitcoin.
	I think spendbitcoin.com now points to us, if I'm not mistaken.
	Good.
	Let me just see.
	Since we don't accept it.
	And Mac and Cheese Life, I think, is also Mac.
	Andcheeselife.com.
	Let me just make sure that's...
	Oh!
	Wow!
	Nice page!
	Check it out!
	Mac and Cheese Life?
	Go to macandcheeselife.com.
	Okay.
	Now, this is nice.
	This is a whole page.
	Okay.
	macandcheeslife.com Good work.
	It's a party.
	Mac and cheese life.
	Just getting by.
	The new American dream.
	Thanks, Obama.
	You know, you identified this early on.
	But this whole mac and cheese thing, it's rampant, man.
	It's out of control.
	It really is.
	It's so obvious that we're crashing and burning.
	That's really your protection for the police state.
	Stock up on mac and cheese.
	God.
	Yeah.
	At the market, they've got vegan mac and cheese.
	Everyone's on the mac and cheese chips.
	How does that even work?
	Yeah, I don't know.
	They're making soy into the fake soy cheese and they're making that into the cheap noodle.
	Yeah, that's exactly right.
	Boy, that's got to be gosh awful.
	Yeah.
	Mac and cheese with no dairy.
	What a concept.
	Weren't you going to do a mac and cheese recipe for the newsletter?
	It's still on the list of things to do.
	It will be done shortly.
	It'll be in one of the newsletters.
	I'm actually experimenting with a different version so I can really nail it.
	I'm going to have a lot of butter, by the way.
	Is that the big secret?
	It's not as much of a secret.
	I think I'm going to make it this way.
	I'm going to make a really buttery bechamel sauce, and then into that I'm going to melt some six-month-old or one-year-old, it has to be an American cheese, so it'll probably be a Tillamook, and I'll melt that in there, and then I'll put in some cooked elbow macaroni, which is a key, classic mac and cheese.
	And that would be...
	But it has to be probably...
	I don't want to go with whole wheat because I think that...
	No, no, no.
	That's pansy.
	It misses the point.
	Hipster.
	And he's too hipster.
	So I just find a good Italian elbow macaroni and then use that with this bechamel cheese mixture.
	And the salt and pepper, you're good to go.
	You don't want to overdo these spices.
	Now, bechamel.
	I'm not familiar with this cheese.
	No, bechamel is not a cheese.
	Bechamel is a white sauce.
	Well, where's the cheese?
	I said the Tillamook cheese.
	Tillamook?
	Not only am I not familiar with it, I've never even heard about this.
	Oh, yeah.
	It's very famous.
	Tillamook cheddar is a very famous American-style cheddar.
	There's also Wisconsin ones that are as good or some better, and there's Vermont Cabot would be a good one.
	But I'm thinking Tillamook because it's the rubbery style that you really want to get that mac and cheese mouthfeel.
	And will it have the real yellowy look to it?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	The yellowy look to it.
	In fact, yeah.
	Somebody might want to add some turmeric to the base.
	Is it turmeric or turmeric?
	Turmeric.
	And so do you think that we could powderize this and we could box it up and package it?
	I think this could be turned into a package.
	Because I think this is a product.
	Food companies, if you've ever been in the business, there are food companies called food manufacturing services.
	And you find these guys, they bottle stuff for you, you give them a recipe, they make salad dressing, and they put your label on it, and then they give you...
	Pallets full of the stuff.
	When they do that, they always say, good luck at the very end when they give you all the stuff.
	Then you've got to get it into distribution somehow.
	Wait a minute.
	They give you all the stuff you need and they say, good luck, buddy.
	Is that what they say?
	Yeah, that's pretty much the motto.
	So it's like, here's your crappy salad dressing.
	I don't know what you're going to do.
	It ends up a canned food warehouse, obviously, where everything eventually goes to die.
	Right.
	Canned food warehouse.
	Yeah.
	Well, but I don't think you want...
	I think you want to license your recipe to, you know, to Kraft or something.
	I don't think Kraft cares enough to license anything.
	They got their food technicians.
	They go in the back room and they make this goop and they sell for a dollar.
	Goop.
	Hey!
	How's that goop coming?
	You slaves can get used to mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Cheese macaroni and cheese with cheddar melted together.
	Mac and cheese.
	Just so you know, we were on the tip, on the mac and cheese tip.
	Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of crap, because we are the guardians of reality.
	Such as, I think I called this one, if you want to roll out the red book, I'm pretty sure I said exactly this.
	But only after the trail grew cold and a million dollar reward was offered.
	Well tonight, some of the donors who promised to pony up, they're backing out, and it's not too true if anyone will actually get whatever reward remains.
	A month and a half after that California gun battle involving a former L.A. police officer, a $100,000 reward for his arrest and conviction is being withdrawn.
	In February, Christopher Dorner was wanted for the killing of four people, including a Riverside police officer.
	He was on the run for 10 days.
	Then on February 12th, Dorner was finally located, holed up in a cabin near Big Bear Mountain Lake.
	The cabin caught fire and officials say Dorner killed himself as officers closed in on him.
	Two claims have been made on the reward, but because Dorner was dead before capture, the city of Riverside says the criteria for getting the money was not met.
	That's exactly what I said!
	Yeah, no, this whole thing was a big scam, and of course no one's going to give anyone any money over this thing.
	No.
	And by the way, you know, I bring this up once in a while.
	I brought it up on the Leo Show, and it was like...
	Is that leoshow.com?
	And it was like, you know, the curious thing about that always got me, which you picked up on this, is after the cabin burns to the ground, the guy is turned into a crispy critter.
	He's just completely ruined.
	Yeah.
	And they couldn't even identify him, really, right away.
	And then they roll out the guns he had there, and the guns are in pristine condition.
	Yes.
	I saw you...
	There's not one...
	Mark on any of them.
	And, you know, so this is funny and coincidental, maybe not that you bring this up, because on the very day that President Obama does this whole thing in the White House about, you know, we don't want to take away your guns, but, you know, this is common sense.
	Common sense is just common sense.
	We can't let crazy people have guns.
	Common sense.
	Common sense.
	Common sense measures.
	90% of Americans agree, and the majority of gun owners 90% majority agree, agree, agree, agree.
	Four out of five dentists, everybody agrees.
	No crazy people should have guns, like people in the Fed t-shirts or anything.
	No crazy people have guns.
	On the same day, all of a sudden, we get the search warrants released about all the nutty stuff that was in Adam Lanza's home.
	Did you see this thing?
	No.
	Oh, my God.
	And everyone has their own version of it.
	I could have clipped stuff for days, which I didn't do.
	Give us a wrap-up.
	Yeah, no, I'm going to give you a wrap-up, and then I'm going to give you...
	So here's the main thing that bugged me about this, is they have this whole list, and I have in the show notes, you'll find the actual copy of the search warrant and...
	And all of the items.
	It's just tons and tons of items that are found in his home, including bogative things like an NRA certificate, which you can print out from the website.
	You know, what does an NRA certificate even mean?
	He had pictures and prescriptions and subscriptions and just it goes on and on and on.
	And a check from his mom for a C-183 firearm, which no one really even knows what that is.
	Here we go.
	Receipts and emails documenting firearm ammunition and shooting supplies.
	16-day planner pads from nightstand.
	Verizon wireless cellular phone bill.
	Books from master bedroom closet.
	Blue folder labeled guns containing receipts and paperwork and other firearm-related paperwork.
	School-related paperwork.
	Email gunbroker.com.
	One Visa Platinum debit card.
	Printed photographs.
	Miscellaneous handwriting paper.
	Sandy Hook report card.
	All of this stuff.
	Including samurai swords and they've actually put some stuff in bold so the prostitutes can see that, oh, I'm supposed to be talking about this.
	I wonder what they would do if they walked into my office and did the same kind of inventory.
	ISDN modem!
	Two of them!
	Why?
	What was he planning?
	USB speakers.
	Oh no!
	Those could be used Bluetooth speakers.
	Why did he have both?
	It's funny because I was thinking of you.
	I was actually thinking to myself, God, I hope no one ever goes into John's office.
	Oh my God, he's got two of these train whistles.
	Why two?
	What was he up to?
	Well, let's spot the things we could have found in John's office.
	Exhibit 604.
	Four pieces of paper with miscellaneous writings.
	Ooh, miscellaneous writings.
	Yes.
	Exhibit 606.
	One paperback book titled, Train Your Brain to Get Happy, with pages tabbed off.
	Whoa!
	Whoa!
	Here we go.
	John, this could have been in your office.
	Seven journals with miscellaneous drawings.
	Journal authored by Ryan Lanza.
	Hmm, interesting.
	Well, that I won't have.
	Box of miscellaneous photographs of family.
	Holiday card containing Bank of America check 462.
	What's the point of this?
	What is wrong with these people?
	Why is this reported?
	These idiots won't report on anything, and then they're reporting on the guy having an uncashed check?
	But here's the thing that I found interesting.
	No display.
	Typically, law enforcement does a big display, certainly if there's a bunch of weapons.
	So he had a gun safe, and he had samurai swords, and he had a BB gun, he had all kinds of stuff.
	They didn't have the table of crap?
	No!
	Why?
	Well, because it doesn't exist, I think.
	I would buy that.
	So listen to the prostitutes on CNN. It really jumps to mind.
	If Adam Lanza had a gun safe in his room and all of these guns and ammunition, why was he allowed to have...
	Why was he allowed to possess such things if he was such a troubled young man?
	Oh, the war on crazies!
	That is the question that we've been asking from day one.
	They've been asking from day one.
	What did his mother know?
	When did she know it?
	Was anyone else aware of it?
	That's like five questions.
	Now, this cooperating witness...
	Appears to have had knowledge because according to...
	Oh yeah, they have a witness.
	They have a witness who is...
	These documents now released, this person told authorities about the gun safe and about that he was an avid gamer and this kind of thing.
	And this kind of thing, that is how we report facts on CNN. So if you have a gun safe and you're a gamer, you report to authorities?
	Yes!
	This is like, I guess this is like the father of the crotch bomber who immediately, because his son was a little, you know, believed in the name of Jihad, he went and turned him into the CIA who did nothing?
	Is that the same kind of bull crap, which, you know, didn't happen at all?
	Uh, item number 86.
	Look me in the eye.
	My life with Asperger's book.
	Born on a blue day.
	Inside the mind of an autistic savant book.
	They should see my books.
	Jeez, I hope no one looks at my books.
	That he was an avid gamer and this kind of thing.
	So, how many people knew about this?
	Now, they are protecting the name of this individual.
	Oh, why?
	For good reason, police say.
	Good reason.
	What's the good reason?
	Well, if you'll shut up for a second.
	Everybody's dead.
	Actually.
	We're protecting the name of this individual for good reason, police say.
	They want to protect his safety.
	They don't want his name to come out at this time.
	Why not?
	So they're not releasing it.
	What?
	Yeah, that's it.
	Because it's such...
	And these people report, just read it right off the telephone.
	By the way, when you said that she couldn't read a million, I'm guessing, because I know that the people that run, do the writing, sometimes they get irked.
	They know she can't read numbers, so they probably put a million in one, zero, zero, zero, zero.
	As opposed to writing 1-O-N-E-M-I-L-I-O-N, which is what you do.
	So there's no way you're going to say 100,000.
	100,000 when the words are 1 million, right?
	Yeah, they put these zeros.
	Yeah, zeros, exactly.
	So I put a bunch of zeros on there and you got confused.
	So here's...
	So this is no coincidence, obviously.
	It is national gun, give up your gun day, or whatever, or week, or month, or whatever.
	We have the president saying, we haven't forgotten.
	Nine out of ten Americans agree, and the majority of gun owners, which is some bullcrap statistic, and everyone's repeating this now.
	It's common sense.
	You don't want to be bellicose.
	Nine out of ten, four out of five.
	It's over and over again.
	Okay, we get it.
	But then...
	Now, there's this Sandy Hook mom, and she...
	Remember the blog post back in...
	It must have been January.
	I'm a Sandy Hook mom.
	You probably don't remember.
	I vaguely remember.
	So she comes on the Lawrence O'Donnell show as one of the...
	Oh, that guy.
	Yeah, but she is saying stuff...
	That does not connect at all with anything we've been told.
	In Newtown, Connecticut.
	In Newtown, today, residents protested outside of the National Shooting Sports Foundation, which is one of the largest gun lobbies in the country.
	Have you ever heard of this?
	The National Shooting Sports Foundation?
	No, I haven't, but it doesn't mean they don't exist.
	Well, but he's saying it's one of the largest gun lobbies in the nation, and?
	It happens to be headquartered in Newtown, just three miles away from Sandy Hook.
	Are you shitting me?
	This is made up.
	This makes no sense.
	Okay, let's bring in this mom and listen to her account, which is just chilling, but...
	It makes no sense.
	There's too many survivors.
	There's no witnesses.
	My head is spinning.
	Elementary school.
	Joining me now for an exclusive interview, one of today's protesters, Susan Ludwig, the mother of two children who were at Sandy Hook Elementary School the day of the shooting.
	Susan, thank you for joining us tonight.
	I just want to make clear to the audience, your children survived that day.
	Tell us what it was like when you arrived at the school and saw children being carried out with bullet wounds.
	Yeah, that's correct.
	I have four children, and two of my kids were at Sandy Hook that day.
	One is six, and she's in first grade, and one is seven, and she's in second grade.
	And the day on December 14th, I was headed into school to, I was supposed to be making gingerbread houses at my daughter's, in my daughter's first grade class.
	But on the way to school, about a half a mile from the school, I saw another parent from the class in the middle of the road, and she was with four of those boys that escaped.
	And she said to me, Something's really wrong.
	These boys are saying somebody's trying to kill them.
	So I... Let me just stop here.
	Have you ever heard of four boys who escaped?
	And that her two kids also escaped and they were in the classes where kids were killed?
	I thought we had like one survivor...
	No, no, no.
	Don't you remember that one report where the four kids sat on the guy's front?
	No, that was six.
	That was six.
	Oh, six kids.
	But they were on the front lawn.
	No, no, no.
	But that was not four boys.
	This is different kids, John.
	Just keep listening.
	This is nuts.
	I rushed over to the school, and I parked my car there, and I started to go inside, and there were a couple of police...
	She started to go inside?
	...cars there at the time, and they wouldn't let me into school, so I stayed in that parking lot, and I waited...
	No, everyone was sent over to the firehouse.
	They were not allowed to wait in that parking lot.
	For things to happen, as I waited, more and more police cars came with rifles and whatnot.
	And as I waited, finally one of the police officers came out and he was carrying one of my daughter's daisy friends in his arms.
	And she had long brown hair, just like my daughter's.
	And I had to look very hard to make sure it wasn't my daughter, but it wasn't.
	But she had a gun shot wound to her head.
	Now this, no one, this is not, the kids were left inside.
	They were taken out in the dark of night.
	No one was taken out.
	And she can identify the kid?
	She just walked right up and, excuse me, let me identify this kid that you're carrying out with a gunshot wound to the head?
	This is pretty new information to me.
	...
	all over her midriff, and he held her there until he could get her to an ambulance.
	And I waited, and at that point I thought, you know, maybe this is just...
	We heard the coroner, the chief medical examiner, say that no one was taken to the hospital early.
	They were all left in the building.
	No kid was put in an ambulance.
	You know, a crazy parent.
	And then the second child came out, and she was the sole survivor from the other class.
	And she was absolutely head to toe, covered in blood and flesh, just hanging on her whole body.
	We've...
	Go back.
	Can you play...
	What was the quote about angry parent?
	Yeah, I know.
	I caught that, too.
	She thought it was an angry parent at first.
	Very hard to make sure it wasn't my daughter, but it wasn't.
	But she had a gun shot wound to her head and blood all over her midriff, and he held her there until he could get her to an ambulance.
	And I waited and at that point I thought, you know, maybe this is just, you know, a crazy parent.
	And then the second child came out and she was.
	Interesting.
	Another one came out.
	But that's interesting you say that, because why would she think it's just a crazy parent?
	Because apparently there's crazy parents there?
	Maybe there's something crazy going on in town?
	Well, the whole thing, this story is terrible.
	I mean, I thought we weren't going to revisit it, because all it does is confuse us more.
	Everything that comes up, crops up about this thing, and then the whole, this nssf.org, which is essentially, it's not really a National Shooting Sports Foundation.
	It is a lobby organization for gun manufacturers, from what I can tell.
	And it's, you know, it's just another one of many.
	It's not a big deal.
	And what was the point of O'Donnell bringing it up?
	Well, this was on National, the President Wants to Take Away Your Gun Day.
	This whole thing isn't working for him.
	This is like the same thing with the post office.
	Every time it comes up to try to screw over the post office, as we discussed earlier, every single member of whatever, except for one or two members of Congress, have these constituents that rely on the post office to get their checks or to do something or other, and they can't vote anything against the post office, even cutbacks on Saturday.
	Out!
	Here's what I'm worried about, though, John.
	You know, so there's two things.
	We have this gun thing is not working.
	It's just not working.
	You know, it's just, yeah, they're going to, well, slowly we're going to get to the you're crazy, and therefore you can't have a gun, you can't drive, you can't be on the street, you can't be around children, you can't have alcohol, you can just basically stay indoors and be crazy with your walker.
	No, I watch a lot of TV and buy seeds.
	Yeah, and Morse code, all you can.
	And then you take into, you know, like a North Korea, like, oh, we're going to bomb Austin, ha ha ha ha.
	And of course, you know, no one's buying this anymore, which means they're going to have to light something off pretty soon.
	That's the part that makes it.
	Oh, yeah.
	That's what I get worried about.
	I think we're within two years.
	What did you say?
	You think it's going to be in the next two weeks or?
	We were talking about that, yeah.
	And it worries me.
	Now we've got to light something off to remind people that it can be real...
	It's dangerous out there.
	Yeah, and I'm thinking it would make most sense, because we have the movie Olympus Has Fallen.
	That's the North Korea movie, which is out, apparently.
	Yeah, it's out, and I don't know if it's doing good business or not.
	Well, let's take a look.
	Olympus Has...
	Fallen box office.
	Let's take a look, see how it's done.
	Oh!
	The Croods.
	And...
	But here, box office.
	Five reasons Olympus has fallen.
	Deserves to brag.
	Oh, looks like they've done okay.
	White House on the sheet.
	30 million so far.
	Let's pull off the...
	Here's the headline.
	It's the biggest box office surprise.
	Yeah.
	Not to people who listen to this podcast.
	This is true.
	Yeah, so they're going to make their money on that.
	Yeah.
	But you know what's interesting about that movie?
	Written by two complete novices.
	I was researching this the other day.
	I was trying to find something.
	So first of all, the actor is a producer.
	That's always, you know, hmm.
	I think this guy is the new Clooney.
	You know, Gerard Butler is new.
	He's a new guy in town for the CIA game.
	So he got, you know, you take a movie like this, it's got big names in it.
	It's got, you know, what's his face?
	Morgan Freeman.
	It's got, you know, Gerard Butler himself.
	I mean, it's got big names.
	It has, you know, big budget.
	They shot in Louisiana, so it's real mainstream.
	That's where all the big movies go.
	Boy, this guy does look like a douchebag.
	But the two writings, the screenplay, Unknowns have written no other movie.
	You can look it up on IMDb.
	The director, his biggest claim to fame is music videos.
	He's really a music video director, if anything.
	He had one other movie which I had not heard of.
	Everyone's done some movies, whatever.
	This is like a Hollywood blockbuster Clooney-level movie.
	And it's the President and the White House.
	So it feels like we may have to have a scare in Washington for the North Korea thing to take hold.
	That's kind of the prophecy there.
	Well, it doesn't have to be North Korea.
	I mean, they may, you know, I don't know if that's getting any traction.
	They've got to get something that gets traction.
	Where it's all being talked about.
	Oh, everybody's talking about this.
	How could this happen?
	How could the CIA drop the ball again?
	Right.
	We need something fresh.
	And so it's got to be something completely off the wall.
	So I think it might be...
	Please don't let it be Austin.
	Please.
	No.
	Well, they keep mentioning Austin, so maybe Austin is a target.
	Maybe they're trying to get rid of Bobby.
	Nah.
	Nah, I don't think it's that.
	I think it's...
	We need a new method.
	Don't you think it would be something like that?
	Okay, here's the moneymaker.
	The moneymaker is in detection devices at airports and eventually at parks, ballparks and football stadiums and all the rest.
	So we have to have something happen that got by all these detectors.
	It's a new detector.
	So we need a new detector that has to come back into play or come into play.
	I don't know what it would be because I think they've shot their wad on x-rays.
	The millimeter wave thing could be improved upon.
	I don't know.
	I don't know either.
	Of course we don't know because we're not planning.
	But we can deconstruct it once it does happen.
	We can deconstruct it after it happens.
	We can kind of say that something's going to happen and it's going to be probably in the next 30 days for sure.
	I would be shocked.
	They're going to light something up.
	I agree.
	They're going to light something off and it's going to suck.
	I think there's also the possibility of a stalling tactic, which is one of those FBI setups.
	Where they find some idiot and they talk him into phoning a number that would blow up the Bank of America building or the Eiffel Tower or something from a distance.
	And then they make a big scene about how they arrested this would-be terrorist and he's an American.
	And that puts it off.
	So they're planning something more elaborate.
	I don't know.
	Is there a code word, Austin or something?
	Oh, that could be.
	You know what I mean?
	It's like there's got to be...
	Say Austin to initiate a series of events that go on their own because nobody's really communicating with each other.
	They just wait for the code word.
	That could be.
	And I advise everybody to get your Amazon Prime account and watch the TV series for free in HD Rubicon.
	Oh, is that free?
	You can get that on the Amazons now?
	Yeah, the Amazon Prime free videos.
	They got the whole series in HD. Oh.
	And it's free.
	If you have the Amazon's Primes.
	Right.
	Hmm.
	So, anyway, that show has elements like what we're discussing in it.
	Well, if anyone has any thoughts about Code Word Austin, it feels like this was in a movie.
	You know what I mean?
	Like someone said, Project Austin, or Austin Powers...
	I don't know.
	We agree that this whole we're targeting Austin, that's code, but what is it?
	Yeah, it's definitely code.
	If you type in code word Austin, nothing comes up.
	No, no.
	Secret codes, blah, blah, blah, code word.
	No, no.
	No.
	We'll have to work on it.
	South by Southwest.
	I don't know.
	Nah.
	No, no, no, no.
	Maybe it has something to do with the zip code.
	Because if you maybe deconstruct the zip codes, you get some...
	Well, there's a number of zip codes here.
	That's true.
	787 is pretty much...
	7870 something.
	787?
	Yeah.
	The Boeing 787?
	Yeah.
	There's no...
	Oh, it could be the Dreamliner?
	The Dreamliner crashes?
	That's it!
	You laughed!
	By Joe!
	Okay, wait a minute.
	So the zip code is 787, so...
	But in order for it to...
	Okay, well, it's a 787 going to crash because of...
	Or it's threatened to crash, and it'll be like another crash bomb or a terrorist.
	Terrorist, terrorist, right?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	I think we should stop there while we're ahead.
	Yes.
	Yes.
	I'd rather stop there anyway.
	Meanwhile, we brought back the other CIA assets.
	And now we bring you some late news.
	I'm sorry.
	I forgot to mention Diane's drunk again.
	Now we're bringing some late news.
	And now we're bringing you some late news.
	And now we're bringing you some late news.
	Reports that a U.S. Army veteran from Phoenix, Arizona is under arrest tonight and charged with joining forces with Al-Qaeda, taking up arms in Syria.
	Who could this man be?
	ABC's David Curley has that.
	Eric Haroon made no secret of what he was...
	Remember this guy?
	No.
	Yeah, this is the American jihadi that we talked about, who all of a sudden was over there.
	He was supposed to be a drone target, a United States citizen, but there's a twist to it.
	So he was over fighting Bashar al-Assad with al-Qaeda.
	But he gets picked up on a new meme.
	He's doing it in Syria.
	He posted it on Facebook.
	The former U.S. Army soldier who served between 2000...
	Remember we looked at his Facebook page?
	Oh yeah, this guy.
	But he's here to propagate a new meme.
	Facebook agent.
	What?
	Facebook, the Facebook agent.
	The Facebook agent, yeah.
	Facebook jihadi.
	...was fighting against the Syrian regime, but he was fighting with a group the U.S. considers terrorists.
	Smoke them, didn't we?
	The Phoenix man entered Syria in January, and he quickly linked up with al-Nusra, or al-Qaeda in Iraq.
	U.S. officials interviewed him more than once when he returned to Turkey to acquire weapons.
	And according to the complaint filed against him...
	Ready for it?
	He admitted he was involved in several battles.
	Get ready!
	But yesterday, when Haroun flew here to the Washington, D.C. area, FBI agents arrested him at the airport.
	Why did they arrest him?
	Today, he was in court.
	Bashar al-Assad, your days are numbered.
	Haroon told FBI agents he was part of a RPG team, rocket-propelled grenades, and knew the group that he was with was designated as terrorists.
	Tonight, the charges against him?
	Using that RPG, which the government calls a weapon of mass destruction, outside the United States.
	An RPG is now a weapon of mass destruction, you see.
	But hidden in this report is that he picked it up in Turkey.
	David Curley, ABC News, Washington.
	And the father of a former U.S. soldier now charged with conspiring with al-Qaeda in Iraq as he fought in Syria says that his son is no terrorist.
	In fact, he says that his son, Eric Haroun, is a hero for fighting alongside Syria's opposition.
	The FBI arrested Haroun on Tuesday near Dulles Airport in Virginia.
	They charged him with conspiring to use a weapon of mass destruction outside of the United States, specifically a rocket-propelled grenade.
	Was it legal to use it here?
	Is that what he's saying?
	I'm not getting this report.
	Weapon of mass destruction.
	By the way, just one little throwback again.
	Yeah.
	I have two clips.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Let's do it.
	Homeland attack.
	Play it 2009.
	2009.
	Intelligence to the head of the CIA. They were all in agreement.
	Listen.
	What is the likelihood of another terrorist attempted attack?
	On the U.S. homeland in the next three to six months.
	High or low?
	Director Blair?
	An attempted attack, the priority is certain, I would say.
	Mr.
	Panetta?
	I would agree with that.
	Mr.
	Mueller?
	Agree.
	General Burgess?
	Yes, ma'am.
	Agree.
	Mr.
	Dinger?
	Yes.
	Just chilling to hear those words.
	Chilling!
	To hear those words.
	And then we have another report from the same year on mass destruction, same theme, to scare the public.
	Okay, shall we, well, let's do the, I like the way back sound.
	Here we go.
	Okay, take us back.
	Oh, right.
	Hello.
	John, can you play the harp?
	I'm being here.
	Great to be here.
	Let's start with your assessment actually 14 months ago.
	Is there any doubt in your mind, and I'll begin with you Senator Graham, but either of you, that the threat remains as you assessed it then, that within the next four years it is likely, or more likely than not, that some terrorists somewhere in the world will use a weapon of mass destruction?
	If anything, the odds that we gave a year ago, which was more likely than not, have probably gone up.
	Well, hold on a second.
	You said anywhere in the world.
	So, that totally explains it.
	That's why this guy...
	Yeah, they covered their ass with this guy.
	Shoot a firecracker off and you've got a weapon of mass destruction.
	But what's kind of interesting about this report is another year they bring up, which kind of fits in with the Austin meme.
	In the past 14 months, that is, it is higher than just a straight, slightly more than 50-50, that someplace on Earth a terrorist group would use a weapon of mass destruction between now and the end of 2013.
	And the reason for that is...
	Is that accessibility, particularly of biological materials, has increased.
	The sophistication of al-Qaeda, as we saw on Christmas Day, has become, if anything, greater and more diffused.
	We believe that the risk is real and growing.
	And this was a unanimous final.
	Yeah, and we'll reach a probability by around 2013.
	Of course, we don't have intel telling us the attacks are going to occur in 2013, but if you look at the trend lines, it's a short-term risk.
	That was our point.
	This is not the next generation that has to worry about this.
	And when you say trend lines, briefly, what do you mean?
	Well, although we are doing things, we are making progress in particular areas as a government and with allies, they are active also.
	And it's like we're running, but they're running faster.
	Alright, so let's take the F that I think made everyone the most nervous, which was that a system still hadn't been developed to respond quickly to a bioterror attack.
	Are you talking about what?
	Preventing mass casualties?
	What do you mean by that?
	First, we mean deterrence.
	The reality is that if a terrorist gains access to a biological weapon, they're going to ask themselves, where can we use this weapon to the greatest effect?
	So the degree to which you are prepared to respond to it becomes a significant amount of your deterrence, that it will not be used against you.
	But if you are attacked, The adequacy of your response capabilities can reduce the number of casualties into the thousands, not the tens or hundreds of thousands, and therefore make it something less than a mass destructive event.
	So, Senator Tallent, what is missing in that area?
	What hasn't been done?
	Well, unfortunately, about everything is missing.
	I mean, we've not stockpiled the countermeasures.
	We didn't even have enough vaccines for H1N1 with six months' notice.
	We don't have planned systems for distributing the countermeasures in the event of an attack.
	Many cities won't know whether an attack has occurred.
	We don't have the devices to tell us that.
	We don't have the capacity to clean up afterwards.
	I mean, this is why we gave them an F, because every link in the chain of response, we call it, you know, a chain with links, is inadequate.
	And there's really no reason for that.
	The chairman likes to point out correctly, this is something we can do on our own, and we really don't need international partners to do it, and we should be doing it.
	And so why hasn't it happened?
	It hasn't happened, I think, first because there's been a tendency to want to deny the existence.
	Yes.
	People view a biological attack as seven letters sent in October of 2001.
	That was a terrible thing, but in scale, it was much less than a mass attack.
	What we're talking about is a terrorist attack.
	Putting a slurry of anthrax in the back of a truck with a dispensing device which makes it almost invisible, driving it through a major American city and potentially affecting hundreds of thousands of people.
	That's the scale that we think we're going to be dealing with unless we take some immediate action to raise our barriers against the attack or to be able to reduce its consequences.
	Our establishments are used to the nuclear threats, so new administrations hit the ground running.
	And we gave the Obama administration pretty good grades in nuclear, but they're very slow to recognize bio.
	And it was true for Clinton, it was true for Bush, and unfortunately it's true for Obama.
	We've been trying to tell them for the last year that they need to mount the learning curve more quickly.
	And you did, though, Senator Talent, give them a more mixed set of grades on steps that would prevent an attack.
	All right, that's good enough.
	So how about UT biological weapons?
	Biological weapons.
	Also, if you notice, there's a lot of buzz around the anthrax vaccine that they're giving and they're trying it out on kids and all the rest of it.
	Right.
	So they're testing the new vaccine for anthrax, which is like off the wall, if anything ever was.
	Do you know how many people have emailed me that they have been tested, that they have received, you know, in this service, they've received anthrax vaccine and that they have weird effects?
	Yeah, that's the problem with the anthrax vaccine.
	So this whole scheme relies on a sketchy vaccine that's harmful, apparently.
	And I don't know, maybe they're tweaking it.
	I have no idea.
	But now that they're testing it on kids, I have to assume that they're getting closer to something that they think might be useful.
	Let me tell you this.
	I'll tell you this.
	Get a lot of anthrax vaccinations if some anthrax attack takes place.
	Cyprio.
	We just need Cyprio.
	You know what it's called?
	Cyprio?
	I don't know.
	I think we discussed this years ago.
	Yeah, Cipro?
	Cipro?
	Is that what it's called?
	Cipro?
	Cipro.
	Cipro, yeah.
	Well, look, if they decide to light off some anthrax crap here in Austin, I'd be very angry.
	It wouldn't be.
	No, Austin's the code word.
	It's not the target.
	Okay, thank you.
	No, Austin would be the code word.
	It would never be the target.
	Because Austin, and besides that, like you said, there's every other retired spook and other kind of guy that lives there.
	We're not going to poop in our own nest, people.
	No, it's not going to happen.
	But it's a great code word for 787.
	We'll see.
	We'll see.
	Well, we definitely have, yeah, Cipro, Salaxin, and Citraxel.
	Yeah.
	Treats infections also treats anthrax infection after exposure.
	So what you want to do is get some of this stuff.
	Cipro, right?
	Yeah, Cipro.
	Ciprofluxacin.
	You can basically...
	You can have...
	Your doctor can get that for you.
	They use it for, like, bladder infections, I think.
	Cipro.
	But, you know...
	You should probably get some seeds.
	Yeah, get some seeds.
	So it's a fluoroquinolone, which is associated with an increased risk of tendonitis and tendon rupture in all ages.
	This risk is further increased in older patients, 60 or older, in patients taking corticosteroid drugs and in patients with kidney, heart, or lung transplants.
	It may exacerbate muscle weakness in persons with Myothenia, blah, blah, blah.
	Avoid Cipro in patients with known history of myothenia gravis to reduce the development of drug-resistant bacteria and maintain the effectiveness of Cipro and Cipro oral suspensions and other antibacterial.
	I'm telling you that UT has a lot of bioweapon awards and work going on.
	I'm just Googling around.
	Yeah.
	Bioweapon watchdog seeks suspension of University of Texas eligibility for federal biodefense research funds.
	Anthrax and tularemia bioweapons bungling in Texas.
	That was a while ago.
	Who gives a crap?
	I wonder if you were going to target some pathetic suckers, some pathetic population that you think you could get away with pulling off a stunt to get the public all worked up again.
	Because they're getting apparently lazy.
	It's got to be something that goes boom.
	Because other stuff, people just don't care.
	If you can't see it, if it's like...
	I don't think it's going to be some invisible thing.
	This is not scary enough.
	It has to go boom.
	It has to be an IED. This is kind of what we've been talking about.
	Yeah, but IEDs aren't going to do as much damage as...
	It doesn't have to.
	As long as it goes boom and we can classify it a weapon of mass destruction.
	So maybe an RPG, someone can shoot an RPG at a 787.
	Yeah.
	Now you're talking a weapon of mass destruction at a 787.
	Codename Austin.
	That's a deconstruction I would subscribe to as one of many possibilities.
	And that would do it.
	And we've already got the RPG brought into the mainstream media with this joker stooge that was in fighting against Assad and now he's arrested by the FBI and obviously we won't hear about him for a while.
	Assad.
	Yeah.
	And so we've introduced the weapon as a weapon of mass destruction, and yeah, this could be something that would make sense.
	Okay, I have one more that would get people's attention.
	And the way they have to do it, if they're going to do it right so they don't really kill a bunch of people, is they have to have a fake itinerary of people on the plane, but really there's nobody on the plane.
	I have a different scenario, and then we should stop because we're just speculating, and we're better than that.
	Yeah, go.
	EMP. Why?
	Because a nuclear explosion, which of course would be our Iron Dome, would take out the so-called Korean nuke, but the explosion would create an EMP blast which would switch off electricity.
	Yeah, but then how is that terrorist attack?
	Well, what do you mean?
	Is this the same as a dirty nuke in Times Square?
	I mean, people are stupid.
	They just need to see something.
	All right, well, we'll just let it slide at that spot.
	I want to just remind people that if you compare our product, I do have a clip from the days of yore from PBS, the kind of stuff that you get on that network, the nation's treasure.
	And this is some crackpot guy on one of the begging for money segments, and the clip is called Emblem.
	Yes, I have it here.
	Okay.
	Well, we're back with Michael Bernard Beckwood, the founder of the Agape International Spiritual Center and the host of our show.
	One of the things I love about your presentation, you say it's not a performance, it's a transformance, is exactly that, is how you mine words for meaning.
	You find meanings in words that we don't normally think about.
	For example, the word problem being an emblem.
	Yes.
	Right.
	That's really where the root word comes from.
	It's emblematic of our thoughts and our beliefs, and most of those beliefs are hidden.
	So when we have problems in our life, it's actually an out-picturing of hidden beliefs and things we haven't dealt with yet.
	So it may be a lot like the name agape, where you go into the Greek, you go into the ancient meanings of the words to give new understanding.
	Right, right.
	Right.
	It's called inspired wisdom.
	That's programming.
	Just bull crap laid on as thick as possible by some guy who's just full of it.
	This reminds me of Deepak Chopra when he once said, responsibility is the ability to have a response.
	No, it's not.
	Anyway, go on.
	Yeah, I was going to say that a small news item, which has gone virtually unreported, certainly by your national treasurer there, is that yesterday Israel started shipping gas out of the Leviathan field.
	Now, could this be a coincidence that this comes with the complete rape of Cyprus?
	And you'll recall when we first discovered this Leviathan gas field, which is partially off the coast.
	It's on the Mediterranean.
	It's partially Israeli.
	The Palestinians want some of it.
	Syria can claim some of it.
	Everyone's just claiming some of it.
	But certainly Cyprus.
	And we had Noble Energy.
	We had Gazprom.
	Everyone's circling around Cyprus because it makes so much sense to send your gas from that field up through Cyprus, through Greece, or through Italy.
	Italy now, as we know, their National Gas Corporation has been forbidden to do business with Cyprus by Turkey because Turkey said you get no more gas from us.
	I'm pretty sure the Cyprus Rape Was directly related to this gas flowing.
	Yeah?
	Yeah, well, I just want people to know.
	I mean, you don't get this anywhere else.
	That's part of why people tune in.
	Right, and I want to remind people, by the way, going back to the bullcrap artist that was on PBS, the National Treasure, I did look up the etymology of the word problem, and it has nothing to do with emblem.
	It actually stems from a couple of Greek words, and it means to put forward, and the blem part, it comes from a word balene, to throw, as in ballistics, means a difficulty, as a ballistic difficulty.
	So it has to do with ballistics.
	A problem stems from the word pro and balene to throw forward, to throw forward, to throw forward a problem.
	So you're telling me I have this really expensive DVD set and the guy's full of crap?
	Yes.
	But that's okay.
	You know, people still love that stuff.
	I sit around at a dinner party with some people that will tell you how great this national treasure is and they think we're crazy.
	Are the bags, is that, I saw some emails flying around.
	Yeah, we're getting on the bags.
	Is that really going to happen?
	I think it might, but we've got to get the price down.
	Eric had some canvas bags that cost like two bucks to print up.
	I mean, it was way too high.
	And then he's got the bags we wanted, those really cheap ones.
	And then we had some guy send us a note saying, oh, they're not green.
	And I'm thinking.
	When did we become a green show?
	We don't care.
	In fact, we encourage more petroleum use.
	Go out there, siphon your tank, and spew it on the ground.
	Not green!
	I missed that email.
	Time and time again, and these people got these canvas bags that are dirty and grimy, and then you have the...
	Here's the one that really gets me.
	You got some guy in the vegetable market store, and he doesn't want to use the plastic bags to put the vegetables in either.
	So he just basically grabs a bunch of onions and a bunch of potatoes, and he has them all individual.
	And so then he puts every one of them on the counter with no bag, just a bunch of vegetables, miscellaneous vegetables on this dirty, grimy conveyor belt.
	The vegetables are just spread out all over the place.
	So you can't put all the potatoes on the scale unless they're in a bag.
	So he's individually weighing every potato.
	And then he stuffs, again, each individual potato and charred and the rest of it into his dirty old canvas bag, and then he pulls out some sort of a green wallet, and he...
	He's got dollars that are all grimy, and he's touching them with his hands, and he's touching the vegetables.
	It's disgusting!
	Hey, did you kick him in the shins?
	I should have.
	Well, Miss Mickey is way into this.
	She's like the no-agenda CD promoter.
	She's like, oh, these bags!
	When are the bags coming?
	The whole market's going to have bags.
	She's going to go into Whole Foods and put in the bags.
	I have to say, she does a lot of the, if there's grocery shopping to be done at HEB, She does that, and she's seen all the same stuff, and she's like, this is really great.
	The bags are a great idea.
	I'm like, yeah, but it's really expensive.
	The ones that they sell you for 99 cents in most of the stores are kind of a weird, I don't know what the material is, but it's cheap.
	They work great, and they hold a lot, and the handles are sturdy.
	They're made out of nylon cord.
	They're not green!
	And they're not green.
	They can be painted green.
	Now, what are we going to put on them?
	Because I think this is what we haven't discussed, is what is going to be on the bag.
	I'm thinking it has to be something really catchy.
	I think we can put a bunch of our jingles on the bag or we can put a little speech on the bag.
	I don't know.
	We actually have to have a meeting or some email group wear stuff going on so we can figure out what to put on the bags.
	Okay.
	We know we got the No Agenda logo with the microphone.
	We got that.
	Yeah.
	We got to set up a SharePoint.
	Oh, God.
	A microphone, a SharePoint server, so we can have this meeting.
	Well, I think here's the meaning.
	Shut up, slave.
	I think that should be on there.
	I think Shut Up Slave is good.
	Living the mac and cheese life.
	That would be good.
	I like that.
	Just getting by.
	Hold on a second.
	Hold on.
	We'll stop.
	Are you writing these down?
	Are you writing them down?
	Okay, this is the meaning right here.
	All right.
	Hit him in the mouth.
	Chat room, you can chime in here.
	So Shut Up Slave.
	Shut up already.
	It's science.
	Will this fit?
	Will this look okay?
	We'll write them all down and then we'll sort them later.
	Okay.
	Okay, so if I just look at the jingles.
	You could also do Monsanto with three O's.
	I'll veto that one.
	Pre-crime.
	Pre-crime.
	That's funny.
	Take that to the bank.
	And you could actually say, take this to the bank.
	Yeah, I like it.
	What else do we have?
	It's a fractal.
	No one would get that one.
	It's too obscure.
	How about just the number 33?
	It's a really big 33.
	People go, hey, why is 33 on your bag?
	Bag number 33.
	Bag 33.
	Brawl.
	LGY. I think Brolf will be funny.
	What are we learning, Brolf?
	Fuck the chat room.
	I think that is a very good...
	In the morning, obviously.
	I've always liked the bumper sticker, wake up in the morning.
	I've always thought that was really good.
	Eric did those.
	Just send us your cash.
	We got a lot!
	Yeah, we're loaded to the gills with memes.
	And on today's show, there was not one in the morning.
	Well, that's outrageous.
	Not only do I have...
	Well, I'm sorry, by the way.
	I mean, I am in control.
	I do have a shut-up slave in Chinese.
	We have to have somebody write that out for us.
	Don't drone me, bro.
	That's a good one.
	Johnny Bitsway.
	Johnny Bitsway.
	If you put all these on, some font that they all fit on the back, and at the bottom it would say, to know what all this means, visit noagendashow.com.
	Right.
	Do you think that it's possible to have all these different ones, or is it going to cost extra to have different things?
	No, no.
	I mean, it's just going to be the same plate.
	I mean, it's just going to be a smaller type size, probably 20 point.
	And you put it all on the back, and then on the other side...
	You'd have the logo, the No Agenda logo on NoAgendaShow.com at the bottom, and maybe in the morning across the top, and then, you know, being printed in white on a nice black bag or something like that.
	And you'd have the thing, and people would wonder what it was because it's going to be weird.
	And Bag 33, you know?
	I like Bag 33.
	That could be a whole art piece.
	Yeah, Bag 33.
	Well, artists get to work.
	And Don't Eat Me Hillary Clinton.
	That may be a bit much.
	That's a good one, actually.
	Yeah, I like that.
	Because it has something to do with food, kind of.
	But I think we should also focus on some things that have to do with shopping.
	Yeah, okay.
	All right, everybody.
	Good meeting.
	Great.
	We're done.
	Good meeting.
	Great.
	We've got to go.
	Good meeting.
	Congratulations, my friend, on show 500.
	Yes, well, congratulations.
	Thank you for calling me your friend.
	friend.
	That's a huge step for you.
	Yeah.
	Do you have anything you want to play us out with?
	Because I'd just like to do the resolution of the 1960 Austin atomic attack.
	Well, yeah, we want to play something because we have a lot of new listeners since four years ago.
	And I would like to play the analysis that was done with...
	Anderson Cooper on a 60-minute show with this guy Schmidt and how O'Biden.
	Why we say O'Biden?
	People don't understand.
	We say O'Biden.
	Well, his name is Joseph O'Biden.
	It was because Sarah Palin would say O'Biden and they have that whole bit.
	Oh, really?
	Or we got...
	That's a good bit.
	Actually, the one...
	Actually, I got a better one.
	It's one minute.
	A lot of people don't remember, but back during the first two years of the Obama administration, when they had the House and the Senate to themselves, especially in the House of Representatives, they were abusing the Republicans.
	They were turning off the lights.
	They weren't letting them talk.
	Remember the turning off the lights?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	They turned off the lights.
	Sorry, we're out of here.
	Turn off the lights.
	The Republicans were totally meaningless for those two years.
	They could have done a lot with those two years, but they did nothing.
	Why did they do nothing?
	Why was that?
	Well, you tell me.
	I don't know.
	They didn't want to do anything.
	But so there's this one-minute rant, which goes back to that era, which I just always thought was one of my favorite clips.
	And play that, and then I think I'll be good.
	But which one is?
	Oh, the one-minute rant.
	Yes, I got it.
	Okay.
	I'd rather invest the money elsewhere than there.
	I yield back.
	The time of the gentleman.
	He has expired.
	The gentleman from California, Mr.
	Rohrabacher, is recognized for one minute.
	Thank you, Mr.
	Chairman.
	Let me just note for the record that I am very disturbed with a policy that has ended up with giving me one minute.
	To express my opinions and to ask questions at this very important hearing, considering my background in Afghanistan.
	So I'm sorry.
	I apologize to the two witnesses.
	I'm going to say some things, and I just have to say it quickly.
	Number one...
	30,000 troops, more troops in Afghanistan means $30 billion more a year.
	My experience in Afghanistan tells me for a small portion of that, we could buy the allegiance.
	We could earn the goodwill through payments to tribal leaders and village leaders throughout that country without putting anybody at risk.
	Number one, I'd like your reaction to that.
	Number two, when General...
	Your statements about Afghans fearing their militias is disturbing to me.
	Dramatically disturbing.
	Militias there are nothing more than all the male children in their villages.
	The time of the gentleman has expired.
	The gentleman from Virginia is recognized for five minutes.
	I think the chairman.
	And it's gone.
	Yeah, nice, nice, nice.
	By the way, that's true.
	We should have just paid him off.
	Yeah, no, it's always been true.
	But that doesn't work for the big system, for the big military-industrial complex.
	No.
	No.
	So he got one minute, the other guy gets five minutes, and it's hilarious because they actually made the rule that the Republicans get one minute and the Democrats get five.
	Yeah, that's how we roll.
	Anyway, I'm good.
	Yeah, I'm good too.
	And besides thanking you, John, I would like to thank Buskill Jr., Eric the Shill, Mimi, Jay, the whole cast of characters there at the Dvorak Compounds for being a part of 500 programs.
	It's not always easy when someone in the family is nuts and talks crazy and affects the family life.
	I'd like to thank Ms.
	Mickey and my lovely daughter, Christina.
	And I will also thank my ex-wife, who put up with me for a little while.
	Look how that worked out.
	But most importantly, we have to thank you, the producers of the No Agenda podcast.
	Without you, we would not have the stories, the insight, the real professional views, the sources that mainstream ignores or manipulates into their bullcrap agenda.
	And, of course, for your financial contribution and donations to the show.
	Is the only way we keep going because we cannot have commercials.
	I think it's abundantly clear why we can't.
	And I would like to leave you with a minute of resolution here as all is well in Austin after the nuclear attack.
	Austin will grow and thrive.
	No worries.
	And we'll be back on Thursday.
	Are you doing the Easter show?
	They're Easter, Easter.
	They don't do a show.
	Oh, they don't do a show?
	Oh, my God.
	We, the two of us, work on Easter.
	We were working on Easter, exactly.
	Dvorak.org slash NA. Go to...
	Noagendashow.com, noadentonation.com.
	Check out the show notes.
	It's part of what you are participating in, 500.nashownotes.com.
	Coming to you from the new Target in Austin, Texas.
	In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, I'm John C. DeVorek.
	We'll be back on Thursday right here with Show 501, the best podcast in the universe.
	The streets become less deadly.
	The days become a week, two weeks.
	In the shelter of the Klukas home, the occupants are becoming restless.
	They long for sunlight and fresh air.
	And then the news they've been waiting for comes over the radio.
	This is your Austin Civil Defense Director.
	Our monitors report that radiation in the city is now decayed to a point where those in shelters may come out without harm.
	To Roger and Dorothy and Kathy Klukas, this is the end of the storm. .
	To Carolyn Gilbert, this is the answer to a prayer.
	To Clarence Phillips, this news is of no consequence.
	And slowly, Austin, Texas returns to life.
	And slowly, Austin, Texas returns to life.
	In the morning, the best podcast in the universe!

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