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Feb. 24, 2013 - No Agenda

02:42:03

490: Add Bacon

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Time	Text
	It sounds right.
	This sounds right.
	This sounds right.
	I mean, and that sounds like...
	It's right!
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Sunday, February 24th, 2013.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination Episode 490.
	This is No Agenda.
	Surviving on cheap macaroni and cheddar cheese melted together here in the Travis Heights hideout in the east side of South Congress, Austin, the capital of the drone star state of the morning, everybody.
	I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley where the sun is shining, there's no rain in sight, I'm John C. Craig.
	It's Craig Vaughn and Buzzkill.
	In the morning.
	Well, take this then.
	Take that.
	It's going to rain for sure now, son.
	Somewhere it'll rain.
	Ah, yes.
	Nothing like a good rain stick battle in the morning.
	In the morning it is.
	But it is in the morning.
	Hey, you know, we have the best audience in the universe.
	The best producers.
	There is not a problem that they can't fix.
	Because they can do it in the mix.
	We have a problem with long donations.
	What's the solution?
	Just don't send any donations.
	This is very good, people.
	I'm like, I'm looking at the spreadsheet.
	I'm like, oh, okay.
	I guess we don't have a problem anymore.
	Well, actually, we do still have the same problem, only we have a compounded problem.
	Now, apparently, people who want the newsletter or should be reading the newsletter so they can figure out what's going on don't read it much, and so they keep sending the email to the wrong place and other issues.
	By the way, this is the fallout from the last Monday's holiday.
	This always gives us two bad shows.
	Oh, okay.
	It's a fallout.
	Always.
	Always.
	And by the way, Bogut of Holiday, President's Day, it's not a holiday.
	It's when people go spend their money on a great deal on a car.
	No, white goods.
	No, that's right.
	Yeah, yeah.
	White goods being...
	Macy's.
	Washing machines and dishwashers.
	No, and sheets.
	No, I thought white goods were classified as washing machines.
	Oh, I think you're right.
	I think those are classified as white goods.
	But to me, white goods mean sheets.
	Right.
	Right.
	Well, so then there's another issue that cropped up, but we're just on the topic of finances.
	So we brought up, though, the Bitcoin issue once again on the previous show.
	Oh, there goes Tiger.
	Hey, Tiger!
	That's my neighbor Tiger on his Harley.
	You hear him?
	No, I can't.
	Tiger and Bonnie.
	Oh, apparently he's testing the engine.
	I'm doing a show, Tiger!
	Watch Miss Mickey run out.
	Miss Mickey will run out in the road and tell him to stop.
	She'll be like, hey, hey, hey, hey, he's doing a show.
	Look, you may look dangerous on that Harley and everything, I don't give a crap.
	So we bring up the Bitcoin thing.
	And I think it was Buzzkill Jr.
	who was all excited that I had amassed some incredible fortune in Bitcoins, which had just been sitting in my wallet, hanging around.
	I thought I had 300 Bitcoins.
	I was wrong.
	I have 135, which is still...
	That's a lot less.
	Well, still, that's...
	No, it's still like $4,000.
	Yeah, that's better than poking an eye with a sharp stick.
	So I get back into this.
	The last time I looked at Bitcoin, when you scoffed, I think it was around $5 in value per Bitcoin.
	And I had done one daily source code, I think, if people would send me.
	That's probably where I got the 100 Bitcoins.
	And then I kind of forgot about it.
	I was able to order a pound of coffee and a bottle of shampoo or something just to kind of prove that these Bitcoins work.
	And so I look back at the blog post that I wrote then.
	I'm like, you know, it could be great.
	It could be like gold.
	And then I go and look at the chart.
	And I'm like, wow.
	I just want to get your expert opinion on this.
	If you can go to bitcoinchart.curry.com for me, John.
	Tell me this isn't a classic pump and dump or a bubble or something.
	bitcoinchart.curry.com Yeah.
	That should get you to the right one.
	Let me see if I got it here.
	Bitcoinchart.curry.com.
	It should show you a chart of the Bitcoin value over the history of Bitcoin.
	Oh yeah, that's interesting.
	So you see, in June, around May, June is when I started, and it was around 5, and then it went up to 30, and then it crashed.
	And then it's kind of been bubbling under.
	That's in January.
	That's in 2011.
	Yes, yes, exactly.
	It was looking like it was about a buck.
	The bottom is dragging the ground there around May.
	But that's the start of Bitcoin.
	That's when Bitcoin started.
	Yeah, it took off.
	$30.
	Right, and then it crashed.
	It crashed, like literally a day after.
	And now look at...
	I mean, is this not a technical...
	A technical analyst will look at this and say, oh, it's about to crash because it's up at the 30 again.
	Could be.
	But to me, it's like all of a sudden we're hearing Bitcoin, Bitcoin, Bitcoin, just like we were back then.
	It does look like it has a floor around 10, though.
	But yes, but it seems like this is manipulated.
	And isn't the entire point...
	Of this fantastic monetary system was that it couldn't be manipulated.
	And the reason I'm kind of bringing this up is I'm getting emails from people who are like, you know, you're not supporting the Bitcoin community.
	I'm like, community?
	Is it community?
	Bitcoin is like Facebook now?
	I mean, this is not what you want, people.
	You don't want your monetary system to be a cult.
	Yeah.
	A community, no less.
	So, yeah, it does look like there's a floor, but I mean, so, I'm like, well, should I get rid of this?
	You know, people have offered me like $5,000 for my Bitcoins.
	Yes.
	But I don't know.
	Answer to questions.
	Done.
	Get rid of them.
	It could go up to like 300.
	Oh, yeah.
	Well, here's my question to you.
	Are we seeing, is this inflation of the dollar that makes this go up?
	Or is there some, what are the only market forces that could make this Bitcoin go from, you know, in a November 2012, a low of about 3, it looks like, up to 30 as of today.
	Sandbag, or as they like to call it.
	Yeah, exactly.
	How, yeah.
	Yeah.
	So do you think it's a scam?
	I don't know if it's a scam or not.
	I mean, all I know is that you can't go wrong if you get out.
	Well, it's not that easy, apparently, to cash in.
	Then that's really fantastic, isn't it?
	It's like you've got to go through the exchange and then you've got to transfer it from that.
	You're losing money all the way.
	And my big experiment was like, hey, let's try it again.
	If people are into this Bitcoin community, then send me some Bitcoins.
	If I get...
	I was only asking for like 30 Bitcoins total.
	I'm a cheap whore.
	Then I'll do another daily source code.
	And so what happened?
	Well, I got like 0.4 Bitcoin.
	So either possibility A... No one likes the show and doesn't give a crap, which I'll put number one on the list.
	And number two is this community just ain't much of a community.
	You better reverse those numbers.
	Yeah.
	It's like, you know, I'm going to do a show.
	I'm going to work this weekend.
	If you can all send me Principality of Monaco, Franks.
	I can try that.
	Yeah, it's like nobody's got to, you know, you can go to PayPal or just send a check and, you know, you're on your way.
	I mean, it's so easy.
	I mean, it's a good monetary system.
	We already have it in place.
	It's called the dollar.
	Yeah, well, that's another conversation altogether.
	Yeah, well, I'd just as soon take $100 today, as opposed to three Bitcoins or whatever.
	Well, you know, I got more years left.
	Get out of Bitcoin.
	Speaking of having more years left, this was amazing.
	Have you ever heard, and you probably haven't, of Heino?
	Heino, H-I-N-O? H-E-I-N-O. So Heino was kind of like a folky singer back in, you know, when I was doing TV and radio in the Netherlands, Heino was a superstar in Germany.
	Oh, he's that German guy.
	Yeah, he's with kind of the blonde hair and the wraparound black sunglasses.
	Yeah, born December 13th, 1938.
	Gee, gee, oh gee, you Wikipedia, you.
	A-hole.
	So Heino makes a comeback.
	And actually, he's kind of the comeback king.
	And this used to be like the joke, like, oh, he's coming back like Heino again.
	And so he comes back and he does an album full of cover tunes.
	But this is like this big brouhaha in Germany, because now people are calling him, and this is what caught my eye, the headline, German far-right singer Heino stages controversial comeback.
	I'm like, what?
	Wait, wait, it covers a bunch of songs in a cheap album and this is controversial?
	Yeah, so here's one of the songs just to give you an idea of the controversy that is Hino.
	Just listen to the songs.
	Hey, hey, hey!
	We can sing along.
	All right, so it seems pretty tame.
	He's kind of like the German Tom Jones, essentially.
	But what happened is, he's doing his PR campaign, and this is what got to me.
	And someone said, hey, you know, he was doing an interview somewhere.
	And someone asked, you know, how's your health?
	How you doing?
	And his answer was, I'm still as hard as steel, as tough as leather, and nimble as a greyhound.
	And this is what got him in so much trouble.
	Is this something Heinrich Himmler used to say?
	Close.
	These words are unmistakably taken from a speech given by Adolf Hitler to 50,000 members of the Hitler Youth Movement in 1935.
	Oh.
	And so, it's like, why?
	And also, hard as steel, tough as leather, nimble as a greyhound?
	I'd never heard this before.
	Apparently all Germans learn this.
	That this is, you know, like the bad thing to say.
	What was the phrase again?
	As hard as steel, as tough as leather, as nimble as a greyhound.
	We'll make a great title of the show.
	Hard as steel, tough as leather.
	Well, maybe what he needed was a PR guy to change the words around.
	Well, yeah.
	To be hard as tungsten.
	He needed the Curry Dvorak Consulting Group is what he needs.
	Tough as what?
	Tough as a cheap, as a $2 steak, which is what we'd say here.
	And how about hard as...
	Hard as tungsten, tough as a $2 steak, and nimble as a Goldman Sachs stockbroker.
	He's updated.
	There you go.
	And we can have Obama say that to his little Jugend.
	Which...
	Which seems to be on the way.
	There's a bill in now.
	Let me see.
	Where did it go?
	I'm trying to figure out who put it.
	Here it is.
	H.R. 748.
	Now, we knew this was coming, but here it actually is.
	I want to find out who put this bill in.
	House Resolution 748 to require all persons in the United States between the ages of 18 and 25 to perform national service.
	Oh yeah, we've been following this for five years.
	Well here it is.
	500 shows.
	Either as a member of the uniformed services or as a civilian service in a federal, state, or local government program with a community-based agency or community-based entity.
	To authorize the induction of persons in the uniformed services during wartime to meet end-strength requirements of the uniformed services, and also to provide for the registration of women under the Military Selective Service Act.
	So I think what happened is that, and people, you got duped.
	Women, so all these women were like, yeah, we want to be on the front lines, yeah, we want equality, yeah, we want to be in combat.
	Well, moms, you basically just helped your kids get inducted into the brown-shirt Jugend.
	That's about it.
	Good work, Mom!
	Hey, Mom, thanks a lot.
	I mean, that's literally what happened here.
	Let's see, who introduced this bill?
	Rangel, oh yeah, okay, Rangel introduced this on February 15th.
	Frankl's been trying to, since, I don't know, since 2001, he's been trying to re-initiate the military draft.
	Yeah, which is essentially what this says, but he turned it around and he took that whole movement for equality of women in combat and turned it into, yeah, we got your kids now too.
	I don't know.
	I don't get it.
	I don't know what they're trying to do here, but just part of the militarization of the country.
	Well, it's what we do.
	Meanwhile, in more kind of, I guess, genteel, a genteel thing has happened.
	It's a breaking news as far as I'm concerned, a little bit of real news.
	But there's a new network found on the Dish Network, and I think it's showing up on cable.
	It's called Discovering America.
	Oh.
	And it has got, I think, the big breakout hit.
	Ha, ha, ha.
	I'm trying to find which clip you're going to call for, so I'm ready for it, whatever it is.
	Okay, this is the breakout hit.
	You're going to hear the, this will explain it all because it's essentially, it's got a little intro to that specific show, then the intro to the entire show, which is obviously clone of another show that you'll probably recognize, but play Bacon Long Version.
	Bacon Long Version.
	Milwaukee, the city of brews in America's heartland.
	But there's just one thing on my mind.
	Bacon!
	Hide the hogs.
	That is like a meat bacon 4x4.
	I'm on an eating odyssey.
	Ready to tackle the city's ultimate bacon creation.
	Oh, we have to put the bacon fat in now!
	I'm Todd Fisher.
	Family man, chef, and proud bacon-loving American.
	I love bacon!
	I've worked my whole adult life in the food industry.
	Make a stop.
	I'm canvassing the nation, city by city, to devour America's best bacon dishes.
	Are we ready for some bacon?
	Bacon!
	These aren't just meals.
	My knees are wobbling so good.
	I'm going to kiss you.
	These are mouth-watering tributes to the greatest meat ever.
	Wait a minute, wait a minute.
	This is my journey.
	This is my country.
	This is the United States of Bacon.
	Wow.
	The United States of Bacon.
	You know, and this is on which network?
	Discovering America.
	Now, let me point out a couple of things.
	One, it's obviously a clone of Anthony Bourdain's show.
	What is the Anthony Bourdain show?
	I have no idea.
	He's another cook who's been traveling around just trying to discover.
	Oh, right.
	And he discovers all the crazy food everywhere.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Okay.
	And so, I mean, the opening is written by the same guy.
	And this guy is extreme.
	We're not talking about...
	We're talking Texas fat.
	Once again, John, we can see that Sharia law is infiltrating America, trying to hurt the Jews with the bacon show.
	I think this show is more insulting than a Muslim Jew that I've ever met.
	But anyway, so the guy is hugely fat.
	Yeah.
	And he's roaming around.
	He can barely move his arms.
	And he eats everything in front of him.
	But it's got lots of bacon on it.
	Just like Bourdain, by the way, if you ever watch that guy's show.
	No.
	Everything he eats is the best.
	It's the greatest.
	There's nothing like it.
	No, I'm watching C-SPAN, and I don't have time for this.
	This is the American culture going down the tubes.
	And what is this, short version?
	Do I play this?
	Is this just a stinger?
	No, that's just the intro without the front pieces.
	I'm Todd Fisher.
	Okay, I got you.
	Bacon is an interesting meat, I will say.
	We have our favorite bacon guy at the Austin Market, which we go to every Saturday.
	If you really get into it, you have your jowl bacon.
	Jowl bacon is quite tasty.
	The problem with jowl bacon is it sticks to almost any pan.
	It's so gooey, it just sticks, and it takes forever to cook.
	Got to put a lot of bacon fat in the pan first.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, that's true.
	That's true.
	But sometimes that's a little too much for me.
	But the culture of bacon is quite incredible.
	I had no idea.
	I mean, when I grew up, it was like it came in a pack, right?
	And you could see the little window.
	And my mom would, in the supermarket, would look at the back of the window and go like, no, that's too much fat.
	No, we won't take that one.
	Like, all right, Mom, whatever.
	Yeah, right.
	Right?
	You know what I mean, right?
	That little window?
	So much fat anyway, who cares?
	Yeah, that little window in the back.
	And now it's like I've been introduced to a whole new culture of bacon.
	Well, let me...
	The one thing I will say about this show, and I hate to say it, it's a great show!
	Really?
	It is a great show.
	He goes to all these cities.
	They do a great package to give you a little history of what's going on in the town.
	It's done in black and white with a phony filter that makes it look like old footage.
	But it's really well done.
	And then he goes from place to place to place, including places like he was in San Francisco...
	I never heard of any of these places, and they all seem very cool.
	They've got a good research group.
	It's well written.
	This guy, this fat guy, Austin, is a natural.
	He does the voiceovers.
	He does the talking in the show.
	He's the host, and he's the guy that's eating all the bacon.
	And I've listened carefully.
	He has never stammered once, flubbed once.
	It's smooth as silk.
	The guy that's like he's a broadcaster all the time.
	Alright, you are now hearing the television production side of the Curry-Devorak Consulting Group.
	We don't usually advocate making programs about meats.
	However, in this case, John seems to be quite enamored.
	It is a great show.
	I would be very proud to have produced that show.
	So can we get him to host...
	Win, lose, or drone!
	Can we get him to host our show or co-produce?
	Yeah.
	You have to kind of build under the stage a little bit so it doesn't cave in.
	So let me move into some drone news so we can slowly slip away from your bacon fetish.
	Although I wouldn't mind having the perfect John C. Dvorak bacon recipe.
	So you can put that in the next newsletter.
	We have just a treasure trove of drone news that has come out in the past couple days since the last episode of The Best Podcast in the Universe.
	And the one that...
	Well, this is kind of a double header on our show.
	So, apparently, we have sent 100 troops over to Niger...
	With the sole intent of building a drone base.
	Now the way the President announces this information to Congress is with a little note.
	He sends a little memo.
	I've got the memo here somewhere.
	And, you know, the memo basically says, hey, you know, I'm just sending a couple people over there to 100 troops.
	You know, they'll be armed, of course, obviously.
	But that's, here we go, I got it right.
	Just to protect themselves.
	Concerning Niger.
	Yes, that's exactly what he says.
	Here it is.
	Mr.
	President!
	Dear Speaker, on February 20th, the last elements of a deployment of approximately 40 additional U.S. military personnel entered Niger with the consent of the government of Niger.
	This deployment will provide support for intelligence collection and will also facilitate intelligence sharing with French forces.
	They've got a little social network there.
	Conducting operations in Mali and with other partners in the region...
	Not mention who the partners are.
	Can't they just do this over the internet?
	They could.
	The total number of U.S. military personnel deployed to Niger is approximately...
	I mean, we don't really know exactly.
	When you're up to 100, it gets hard to count.
	100.
	The recently deployed forces have deployed with weapons for the purpose of providing their own force protection and security.
	I directed this deployment of U.S. forces in furtherance of the U.S. national security interests...
	Hold on.
	And pursuant to my constitutional authority to conduct U.S. foreign relations as commander-in-chief.
	He's such a...
	He's King Obama, the warmonger.
	Of course, the mainstream media can't ignore the fact that we're opening a drone base and that this is why these troops are deployed to Niger, but they're going to wrap it up in a little joke.
	And I guess they were holding on to this.
	There's a little memo they found in 2011.
	It was like, okay, so we want to tell people that the president is pretty much just deploying troops everywhere in Africa, and they're going to build a drone base there.
	It's very convenient to have that, you know, pipeline protection, mineral protection, all kinds of cool reasons to drone brown people living in sandy areas or in jungles.
	We're going to wrap it up in a joke.
	Wolf, one tip is to use smoke as cover by burning tires.
	Al-Qaeda fighters in Africa may need to do some of that soon.
	Today, President Obama informed Congress that a small U.S. deployment of troops to Niger was complete.
	CNN has reported that Niger's government has agreed to let U.S. drones operate from its territory so those drones could put a lot of pressure on Al-Qaeda militants in nearby Mali who are battling French forces.
	So that's kind of the, there's some actual news there.
	But now, let's make it all funny by laughing at the dumb terrorists with a list they put together of how to protect yourself from a drone.
	To counter them, this tip sheet has suggestions ranging from the clever to the obvious.
	Don't use your wireless device.
	Hide under thick trees.
	For Al-Qaeda fighters on the battlefield, words literally to live by.
	Those are among 22 tips for militants on how to avoid drone strikes.
	The Associated Press recently discovered a document with those suggestions in a building in Mali, where Islamist militants are battling French forces.
	The document had also been posted on jihadist websites.
	The available evidence suggests that the drone strikes have been psychologically traumatic to al-Qaeda.
	It's induced a high degree of paranoia in their ranks.
	They're fearful that they've been infiltrated by spies.
	This is stock footage, of course.
	You know, it's like they just bring in, oh, we got to the Asian English guy.
	Always sounds official when you put him on.
	Osama bin Laden, shortly before his death, had written letters to other al-Qaeda leaders with similar suggestions, saying their fighters shouldn't meet on roadways and move too much in their cars because many of them got targeted while they were meeting on the road.
	Bin Laden also suggested, quote, he should move only when the clouds are heavy.
	As for this other list of suggestions...
	One of the tips...
	If you're in a car and you learn there's a drone after you, leave the vehicle immediately and all the passengers should scatter in different directions.
	Another one?
	Set up fake gatherings of people using dummies to throw the drones off the trail.
	So it makes these militant terrorists sound like stupid sand bunnies.
	Like total nincompoops.
	So, you know...
	And sometimes I even forget to do this.
	I only did it this morning.
	I'm like, you know, this paper's got to be out there.
	This tip sheet.
	This stockbroker tip sheet.
	Hey, Abdullah, don't go outside unless it's heavy cloud cover.
	The drone might kill you.
	If you feel the drone is following you, get scatter.
	Just scatter.
	I mean, come on.
	I want to read this thing.
	So I have a copy of...
	The paper which is written in Arabic and a translation which I can only trust is an accurate translation.
	We have plenty of producers who can read this and will back me up.
	But, to my surprise, the news media has omitted several important points in this memo.
	First of all, it is referred to as a Strategies of Capabilities for Ansar al-Sharia.
	And this is from, it mainly focuses around Yemen.
	And so in this memo, it starts off by saying, we have to know that all Americans do not That the Americans did not resort to this approach, the war of the drone, because they have shortages in the combat jets like the F-16 and other types they don't possess, or that they don't possess enough troops because it is the most suitable approach for them.
	Now, the Americans fully realize that they are in the tenth year of war and that they were economically exhausted and suffering human losses and were confronted with public pressure backed by Congress in a way that made the honorable and responsible withdrawal from war as a prime goal of the White House, which is true.
	The drone is unmanned and costs almost nothing compared to the manned jets and does not create public exasperation when it crashes because of the increase of human losses in the past pushed the American people to go to the streets shouting, bring back our sons.
	If a drone crashes, no one will shout, bring back our planes.
	So, you know, so far making sense.
	So, what are we going to do, the memo says.
	I believe that foiling this strategy depends on three things.
	One...
	The formation of a public opinion to stand against the attacks, deterring of spies and tactics of deception and blurring.
	The tactics are...
	And this is great.
	So, the tactics.
	We have these 22 points.
	What did we just hear from CNN? Scatter if you hear the drone.
	Put out mannequins, dummies, shop window mannequins to fake them out.
	Stand under a tree.
	Well, interestingly...
	Stand under a tree.
	Here's the list, starting with number one on the list from the memo.
	It is possible to know the intention and the mission of the drone by using the Russian-made SkyGrabber device to infiltrate the drone's waves and the frequencies.
	The device is available on the market for $2,595, and the one who operates it should be a computer know-how.
	So right off the bat, they're talking about the sky grabber.
	You can Google that.
	And there are people who have sky grabber.
	This is basically intercepting the unencrypted video, which we've known about for years.
	Right.
	It's been going on for a while.
	So that was number one on their list.
	Two.
	So wait, wait.
	Stop a second.
	Hold on.
	So you're telling me that the media just sent us off on a wild goose chase of bad information when the memo, in fact, which you have, because it is available, and they could have looked at it too, right?
	I think they did look at it.
	And do you think they were told not to talk about it?
	Well, I think it was more fun.
	Or do you think they just trivialized it?
	Well, I think it's both.
	A, I don't think that CNN would be in good graces and get lots of interviews with the administration and officials if they were telling all the human resources that you can go out and get the Sky Grabber.
	In fact, you can find websites that stream Sky Grabber video.
	So you can actually watch this in real time as these drones are flying around because it's unencrypted.
	And we've known this from the drone operators and sysadmins who listen to this program and help produce it, that there's tons of reasons why it's unencrypted.
	Mainly because the whole system sucks and the video wasn't coming back and they just, oh, screw it.
	Switch off the encryption crap so at least we can fly the plane.
	So the whole thing is flawed.
	Now, two on the list.
	Using devices that broadcast frequencies or pack of frequencies to disconnect the contacts and confuse the frequencies used to control the drone.
	The Mujahideen have had successful experiments using the Russian-made RACAL. R-A-C-A-L. So basically a jamming device.
	These Russians, they got it going on.
	Three.
	This is a good one.
	Spreading reflective pieces of glass on a car or the roof of the building.
	That's not a stupid piece of advice.
	Four, placing a group of skilled snipers to hunt the drone, especially the reconnaissance ones, because they fly low about 6 kilometers or less.
	True.
	No one talks about that.
	Five, jamming and confusing of electronic communication using the ordinary water-lifting dynamo fitted with a 30-meter copper pole.
	Now, I'm not quite sure.
	We did it again.
	Maybe we can figure it out.
	Jamming of and confusing of electronic communication using the ordinary water-lifting dynamo fitted with a 30-meter copper pole.
	Now, what I get out of this is that a dynamo will make a huge racket which will disturb any type of HF frequencies.
	Right, and you're using a long copper pole as an antenna.
	Well, 30 meters, I guess, you know, that's a...
	100 foot.
	Right.
	Like an antenna.
	But specifically saying 30 meters is because it's an antenna.
	And I guess, you know, that's probably...
	What do you think the drones operate on?
	What frequency?
	It's got to be gigahertz frequency, right?
	No, it has to be long distance, so it's got to be long wave.
	So it's got to be that, you know, the stuff your HF or, you know, really...
	Yeah, no, it's got to be something like...
	I don't know, 16 meter or something like that.
	30 meters is going to be...
	30 meters is a big wave.
	Yeah, 30 meters.
	They're probably on 30 meters.
	That's 10 megahertz.
	Well, there's ham band at 30 meters.
	Well...
	Hmm.
	Anyway, so this is basic stuff.
	So far, I haven't seen anything stupid.
	And we're only up to number five.
	Keep going.
	I like this one.
	Jamming of and confusing of electronic communication using old equipment, keeping them running 24 hours because of their strong frequencies, it is possible using simple ideas of deception of equipment to attract the electronic waves, similar to those used by the Yugoslav army when they use the microwave oven in attracting and confusing the NATO missiles fitted with electromagnetic searching devices.
	I didn't know that.
	Did you know that?
	No, but I love this.
	Go take your microwave out in the desert and flip it off.
	Hey, we got a baked potato.
	Put a potato in there just in case we get some use out of it.
	So not until number 10 do you get to hide under thick trees because they are best cover against the planes.
	Number 12, maintain complete silence of all wireless contacts.
	And then this is...
	I mean, I find this to be very relevant to this memo.
	The drones used in the attacks in Swat Valley...
	chips or radioactive dyes placed at the target by the spy or the agent.
	Then the guided missiles come directly towards these targets.
	The spy, therefore, is the main pillar of this operation, which is needed to resort to decisive deterrent means against anyone who might dare to carry out this mission to be hanged in public places with a sign hanging from his neck, identifying him as, quote, American spy or any other deterrent quote, American spy or any other deterrent means similar to that done to Israeli spy hanged in Syria Levi Cohen or late Afghan president Najibullah.
	So what they're saying is, you know, people are walking around spraying some radioactive dye on your clothes and they're basically marking you.
	And we've got to, you know, stop these spies by hanging them with a little memo that says, American spy.
	That's interesting because there was actually a NCIS Los Angeles that discussed the spray can of some weird stuff.
	I think that was DNA spray, probably?
	No, no.
	It was something that was semi-radioactive.
	It wasn't pure, but some maniac had gotten a hold of a can of this stuff and was spraying everybody in Los Angeles.
	And so when they brought up the monitor or some, I don't know, helicopter drone over the city, and they found all over the place people wandering around with stuff on their pant leg.
	Because the guy would bend over and start doing his shoes.
	You're tagged.
	And spray people while they were walking by.
	Wow.
	We should look into that a little more.
	Yeah, it's different than the IR paint, which is supposed to keep the drones from killing you.
	And then finally, I'm quoting from this memo, We
	start kidnapping Western citizens in any spot in the world, whether in the Islamic Maghreb, Egypt, Iraq, or any other easy kidnapping places, and the only demand is the halt of attacks on civilians in Yemen, which is a just and humanitarian demand that will create world support and the public opinion pressure in America as they are being hurt again.
	We therefore aim at the core of the nation's strategy, which, if failed, America will accordingly collapse!
	These guys are wide-eyed optimists.
	We also are taking part in laying a block in the promising Islamic State in the Arab Peninsula.
	So, kidnapping.
	This, I think, is very relevant.
	So, first of all, they cover up the whole drone thing by laughing at, oh, they're so stupid.
	But I don't see anything about mannequins, by the way.
	And the guy in this news report literally had, like, five shop mannequins.
	Actually, it does say it here.
	There's nothing about mannequins in the actual report?
	No, I'm sorry, it does.
	Using dolls and statues to be placed outside false ditches.
	But he was like in a parking lot and had like five store mannequins.
	But nothing about the Russian devices, such as the SkyGrabber or the Rakal.
	What do you think I can pronounce that?
	Rakal.
	What is that?
	Rakal.
	Let me see what this thing is.
	Rakal.
	What can the Rakal do?
	R-A-C-A-L. Rakal.
	Rakal.
	Electronics.
	Oh, here we go.
	Hmm.
	Raycal Electronics PLC wants the third largest...
	Oh, it's a British electronics firm.
	Or was.
	So I guess Raycal makes it.
	Raycal.
	The Deca Radar.
	Okay.
	Oh.
	So those guys eventually turn into Vodafone?
	Wow.
	Alright.
	So, bottom line...
	Screw you, mainstream media!
	There's the reason people should donate to the show.
	This one report, which seemed innocuous when it ran out, I didn't even pay it many attention, you picked up on it quickly, got the real report, which is the one they were talking about, and showed that the mainstream media, they bypassed the whole thing, and just to make some mockery of it, putting us all in danger, I might add, by not taking this seriously.
	I'm being kidnapped.
	Yeah, I'm being kidnapped.
	I think I'm going to go to Yemen this weekend.
	Because there's no danger of kidnapping.
	Let's go on a bender in Yemen.
	God, I'd love to go.
	Get me some cot.
	Yemen, by the way, is supposed to be fantastic.
	It's supposed to be gorgeous.
	Get some cot.
	But you'd better be with a lot of locals.
	There was another thing on kidnapping over the weekend they were talking about in some part of somewhere.
	Damn it.
	Think about clipping it, but kidnapping for money has always been a thing that's popular in Brazil.
	Everywhere.
	Mexico, for sure.
	Do you want me to wrap up the whole drone thing?
	Because I've got like four more things.
	It was a bonanza of drones.
	Do you want to thank some people first?
	Should we do that?
	Yeah, let's do some executive producer thanks.
	We can't do that.
	Until I say, in the morning to you, John C. DeVore.
	Oh yeah, well in the morning to you, Adam Curry.
	By the way, in the morning to all ships at sea, boots on the ground, feet in the air, subs in the water, and all the dames and knights out there.
	And in the morning to all of our human resources in the chat room, all lined up, charged up, ready to go, depleting your $9.2 million value, which you're way beyond, some of you.
	NoagendaStream.com, NoagendaChat.net.
	And thank you to our artists, NoagendaArtGenerator.com.
	You guys do a great job.
	Thorin did the art on 489er.
	I can't wait to see what pops up for 490 today's episode.
	490.nashownotes.com.
	And as you said, we're a little short.
	Although it looks like we have an InstaNight.
	No.
	It's not InstaNight.
	No.
	No.
	But it's a night.
	Yeah.
	Cool.
	I think.
	Or a dame.
	A knight?
	Well, I can't...
	No, a knight.
	Yeah, it's a knight, yeah.
	Sizzy is his name in Toronto.
	It came in at $402.25.
	If producers don't see value in information like the lands of Brevik deconstruction, he really liked that, apparently.
	if producers don't see value in that screw them he says there's a morning zoo show somewhere with lots of jingles In the morning.
	Yes!
	Yeah!
	I'm sorry.
	Yeah, we can do that.
	We're borderline morning zoo.
	We are.
	But we actually have information that's valuable, and we use the morning zoo thing to get rid of the laggards.
	I'm telling you, all we're missing is traffic and weather.
	If we did traffic and weather, John, I think you could go over there.
	On the 7s and the 9s?
	On the 3s, of course.
	33 past the hour, top of the hour.
	We got, looks like we have a beautiful day out there in Gitmo Nation.
	And that's your weather report on the 3s here in the morning, everybody.
	Back to you, John.
	I'm going straight to knighthood, he says, and would like to be known as Sir Sizzolot of Gitmo Barony Back Bacon.
	What about bacon?
	By the way, I think the host on that bacon show is big and fat because everybody wants to be Adele.
	It's thematic.
	I'm telling you, fat is in.
	I think I'm a short penny.
	I'm short a penny, so he needs you to toss it in with the karma, please.
	And we can do that for you.
	Absolutely.
	Thank you so much for your donation.
	You've got karma.
	That's very interesting you say that.
	So we'll watch tonight as the entertainment industry, industrial complex, comes together to celebrate the making of fake history.
	As the top two movies are Lincoln, which is so real, we're going to teach kids in school to watch this video, and Argo, which is so incredibly fake.
	Even Jimmy Carter says it's fake, which is so real.
	We'll get to that in a minute.
	Oh, good.
	Yeah, I want to hear that.
	We'll see.
	Everyone wants to be fat.
	And Adele will win another award because she's overweight.
	That's right.
	She'll win it for Best Movie Soundtrack for Skyfall.
	Yeah.
	Which, by the way, is not even a good song at all.
	But anyway, okay.
	We'll be reporting on that in our real news segment on Thursday.
	Who else will be fat?
	Everyone will have gained some pounds.
	Yeah.
	Well, it could be.
	I notice there's a big move now to get people to get fat.
	And bacon, of course, is one way of doing it.
	Yeah, bacon's a good start.
	Blake in Norwalk, Connecticut becomes our associate executive producer at 23232.
	23232.
	In the morning, Jew and Arab, short-time boner, first-time donor, recently road-tripped from Connecticut nuts to Atlanta, and in order to stay awake, I listened to 16 hours in a row of the best podcasts in the universe.
	It's impossible to fall asleep listening to you two deconstruct the bullshit media.
	Recently I thought, what a better way for a slave to repay his fellow slaves for their value for value than to pay you minimum wage slaves for the time you spent keeping me from crashing on that drive.
	We get minimum wage!
	Yay!
	So here's $7.25 minimum wage times 16 hours times 2 for both you, John, and Adam.
	Yay!
	232 plus 32 cents because it felt right.
	Also, I recently found out a co-worker of mine listens to the show, so I wanted to donate before he does.
	Can I get a douchebag challenge call-out for Ben W. to donate?
	Also, can I get a shout-out?
	Douchebag!
	Sorry.
	Yes.
	Can I also get a shot of Jobs, Jobs, Jobs, Karma, followed by LGY for my girlfriend Cindy, who is starting her first ever job next week.
	Unfortunately, she's moving 2,800 miles away from me, so I might be donating again soon for some relationship karma if things don't work out so well.
	Keep up the great work.
	Hey, Blake, thank you so much.
	Yeah, we'll see you at the Swazenov Corner.
	Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
	Let's vote for jobs!
	You've got karma.
	Cool.
	He's an LGY for his girlfriend.
	No, I did that.
	Jobs, jobs, jobs, followed by LGY. You didn't hear that?
	No.
	It goes, really?
	No, I didn't hear it.
	Well, it's...
	Well, maybe I did.
	Hey, John, you know, you actually created...
	What?
	You actually made the jingle.
	You made this.
	This is your work.
	Jobs, jobs, and jobs.
	Let's vote for jobs!
	Yeah!
	That's a crowd of yays.
	That's what everyone wants.
	I'll do that after.
	And by the way, it's not proper to call San Francisco Frisco.
	Frisco's in Texas.
	Just saw this photo.
	You have a clearly slumming...
	You're clearly slumming it.
	This should be the Imperia Vodka and Hugendass.
	Right?
	Mickey, Sir Gene.
	All written in code.
	$202.02.
	Thank you for...
	Did you see the picture?
	...the audience of whatever it is you said.
	Did you see the picture?
	Oh, well, he put the link right there.
	Can you click on the link?
	I'm trying to see if I can.
	This is a picture that I tweeted as we were moving out of Camp Mofo.
	No, I can't click on this one.
	Okay, it's basically two wine glasses, a bottle of Belvedere, and Blue Bell vanilla ice cream.
	Breakfast of champions.
	We got so hammered that night.
	Hey, see you at South by, Sir Gene.
	He's going to come.
	Oh yeah, South by, South by, South.
	Tim DeWornianen.
	How do you think you pronounce that?
	DeWornianen.
	DeWornianen.
	In Round Lake, Illinois.
	As opposed to Square Lake down the street, 200 bucks.
	I'd like to wish my brother Paul a happy birthday.
	Do we have him on there?
	Yes.
	And please give my other brother, Daryl, or I'm sorry, Anthony, a quick shot of karma for a safe journey home next month.
	Anthony is a Marine just finishing up his second year in Okinawa, and we haven't seen him since he left.
	Oh, wow.
	Thanks, and keep up the media assassination.
	All righty.
	Hard karma.
	You've got karma.
	Okinawa.
	Yeah, Okinawa.
	And finally, Sir Michael Miller and Tiburon over here.
	Hey, how you doing?
	Birthday shout-out to Rhino the Beard, and please give a shameless plug to the O-O show, double O show on the NA stream.
	Right on.
	Which I think is Fridays at...
	I want to say 1 o'clock, but I'm not sure.
	You have to adjust accordingly.
	At nagradio.com, you can find out all about it.
	Well, thank you so much for the support.
	We'll have a short donation segment later on, shorter in general, but also it looks like people are catching on a little bit.
	Take a look at the calendar and tell me that my calculation is correct.
	I believe that our 500th show falls on Easter Sunday.
	Let me see.
	So, I thought it was going to be on...
	Oh, wow.
	Chrome just quit.
	I'm pretty sure...
	Chrome's been quitting a lot.
	It's starting to act a lot like...
	Internet Explorer.
	Exploder.
	The AOL browser.
	We met a guy yesterday.
	So, Miss Mickey has some shoot coming up, and she needed a chess board for a photo shoot.
	And someone came up with the genius idea of getting the tar paper that you put on a roof underneath your shingles.
	Yeah.
	It comes on a big roll.
	It's really cheap.
	Yeah, tar paper.
	Is it called tar paper?
	It's like $14 or whatever for a roll.
	And then this guy is like, hey, I need something for my car.
	I'll go in with you.
	I was like, well, what are you going to do?
	They're like, give me $3 for a sheet of this?
	He said, no, I'll cut the 32 squares you need.
	I don't know where the hell I was going with this.
	Forget about it.
	Well, I don't either.
	It was a good one, though.
	I'm sorry.
	The drugs just dried up.
	As I was talking, I'm like, I'm going nowhere.
	I think I should stop myself quickly.
	I think I need air.
	I need the air conditioner on.
	You might get re-reminded if you get your calendar up and count.
	I have the calendar, and I'm looking here.
	So we're 24, so we need 10 more shows.
	So one...
	2, 3, 3, 7, and then 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, yes!
	No, it's on the 31st, yeah.
	Yeah, Easter Sunday.
	Wow.
	Is that weird?
	It's prolific, my friend.
	You know, there was the nationwide NASCAR race on Saturday, and we got a bunch of e-mail that's just people, and they've always missed something funny.
	All the e-mail, all the news stories, there's 33 people who are in.
	Yeah, I know.
	It was actually 28, but it said 33.
	But what was weird about that 33 code is that in the process, car 33 won the race.
	I know.
	I know.
	I think NASCAR is having some kind of problems.
	So the first thing is they let Danica Patrick win pole.
	And then they're like, oh, they got some coverage.
	And then I think the good old boys revolted like, well, are you going to tell me a damn girl is going to be on pole?
	We need some crashes, damn it!
	And I think that's what happened.
	We've got to keep these ratings going.
	NASCAR is huge.
	It's the biggest spectator sport in America.
	It's bigger than football, baseball, basketball, everything.
	It is the sport.
	I think that Daytona Speedway holds 300,000 spectators.
	It's unbelievable.
	Yeah, it's huge.
	Well, that's the race today.
	We'll see what happens.
	When they did the wreck yesterday, I said, well, this...
	I'm telling you, it was PR. No, that's the first thing I thought.
	I mean, I don't think they meant to hurt anybody in the audience because the damn car busted up into a million pieces and threw garbage into the stands.
	And of course, that race on Saturday only had about half the number of people that the race today will have.
	Right, right.
	But I think it was PR. How bad are we?
	Yeah, we are bad.
	This is it.
	We've done this show long enough to know.
	To distrust everything.
	Yeah.
	And when 33 crops up twice?
	Yep.
	You gotta know.
	And oh, by the way, you don't have to email me anymore and tell me that was the age Jesus was crucified.
	Like, okay, I think we've done the research on 33.
	And yes, I know Club 33 in Disneyland and the Freemasons.
	I know.
	I got it.
	I've been to Club 33 twice.
	Yeah, well, you've also been to that thing in the woods where you eat babies.
	Yeah, yeah, we had a couple of babies.
	What is that thing called again?
	Bohemian Grove.
	Yeah, you've been out there.
	Yeah.
	That's my point.
	Well, I've been out there.
	Leo Laporte's been out there, and he gave a speech.
	Hello, everybody.
	And he's doing quite well, so maybe you should have given a speech.
	Anyway, thank you so much to our executive producer and our associate executive producers.
	This is highly appreciated.
	You know that this is a real credit.
	You can go on to IMDb.
	You can join the Producers Guild of America.
	You can try and get laid with it.
	I do know some guys who actually have tried and gotten away with, Hey man, I produced that show, man.
	He didn't want proof.
	Look at my IMDb.
	If you have any, if there's any problem, you can always call us.
	We'll vouch for you, unlike all those phonies in Hollywood.
	And of course, we'd like to thank everyone who goes out and does one simple thing, which is propagate the formula.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Hey, citizens.
	Shut up, slaves.
	Now I'm going to remind people to go to Dvorak.org slash nachanneldvorak.com slash NA No Agenda Show and No Agenda Nation have buttons you can click on and you should get to some donation page or other.
	And keep it short, people.
	Remind me that you're donating to support the show and not just to have some monkey boy dance over here.
	So back to Drone Nation stuff.
	In fact, there's so much today, I think we should do a little bit of our track.
	So first of all, on the very same day we had our program, our previous program, Lindsey Graham, Republican senator, Senator, is he a senator or a congressman?
	I think he's a senator, isn't he?
	I think he is too.
	He comes out and says 4,700 people have been killed by a drone.
	Like, wow, you know, this is like one of the most secretive numbers ever, and no one's supposed to know about, you know, how many people have actually been killed.
	In fact, as we're about to hear from former CIA Director Hayden, the CIA still doesn't even officially recognize or acknowledge they have a drone program.
	But here's Lindsey Graham, and this, of course, sent the compromised news media into a tizzy.
	Because they've got to work on the right propaganda.
	They've got to tone that down.
	So who do you call?
	Well, your buddies at the Council of Foreign Relations, Erin Burnett, or Burnett as we call her here in Texas.
	Republican Senator Lindsey Graham told an audience in Easley, South Carolina yesterday that, quote, 4,700 people have been killed in American drone strikes.
	But he didn't disclose a source.
	Now, total numbers on drone deaths, to the consternation of many, are closely held by the U.S. government.
	So this seemed like a big headline.
	AFP released a story that many media outlets then picked up, writing that, quote, it was the first time a politician or any government representative had referred to a total number of fatalities in drone strikes.
	Well, it might have been the first time, except that when we called Senator Graham's office, turns out he was getting his numbers from a public source, he said, the Bureau of Investigative Journalism.
	Oh!
	Which he said with such a snide comment, snide, condescending voice.
	He doesn't really know.
	He doesn't know.
	It could be more.
	Yeah.
	Well, that's not the vibe she gave us, that it could be more.
	So we've got all of these senators and the congressmen here just coming out with all kinds of crazy talk.
	Let's stop for a second and go over that, because it doesn't mean he was wrong by any means, and she never said he was.
	No, but it was the tone.
	She implied that the public source is not good information, which is bullcrap.
	Yeah.
	Well, because if you're not CNN and you don't have Jeff Zucker running the show, then clearly you're no good.
	Anyway, I'm sorry.
	She's getting more annoying by the minute.
	But you know what's crazy about that?
	Is that the more annoying she gets, the hotter she gets.
	To you?
	No, no, no.
	Her butt is significantly smaller.
	Look at her waist.
	Her waist is just like...
	And by the way, I'm only speaking as a television producer here.
	I'm not talking about...
	Producer mode.
	Okay, I'm going to do that.
	Yeah, hold on.
	I still need to work on her hair.
	She has a snide look that needs to be toned down a little bit.
	She's not going to work in the morning.
	Here's the problem.
	She's not going to work in the morning if they dress her like this.
	She always wears this shimmering, shiny type of top.
	Which, by the way, is very modern, very hip.
	It's what all the girls in L.A. are wearing.
	It's also what the beautiful women in Austin wear it.
	But that's not what we want to see on television, certainly not in the morning.
	It needs to be tailored tight.
	It needs to be Megyn Kelly.
	Yeah, and you need to have a real neckline.
	Yeah, Megyn Kelly.
	I'm sorry, you nailed it, John.
	That's what it has to be, if you want to be successful in the morning.
	And by the way, she's out now, our buddy at CNN there.
	What's her name?
	Our friend, whose name we can never remember.
	Solanad?
	Yeah, she's out.
	Yeah, she's done.
	Yeah, but she'll remain.
	She has her own production company, and she'll make specials.
	This is like the kiss of death.
	That is totally the kiss of death.
	That's like a hiatus.
	Yeah, you'll get...
	Code.
	It's code for you're through.
	You're screwed.
	Get out.
	Find local, local TV. You'll get a nice job as an anchorwoman on some local news show.
	Yeah.
	Go get pregnant.
	Right, it's totally that.
	That's exactly, that's how the meeting went.
	Well, she already ran through the whole, she ran through the gamut.
	She was going to be the Super's next big thing at NBC. They started off at MSNBC. They're going to push her up.
	She failed because there's a better looking multicultural woman that came around and she just blew everybody.
	Who was it?
	Who was better than that?
	I can't remember her name.
	She's on now.
	She is absolutely...
	She's so far above everybody else, it's ridiculous.
	She's gorgeous.
	She's slick.
	She's amazing.
	And she just looks networked.
	She feels networked.
	She's perfect.
	So then Soledad got bounced around.
	I'll get that woman's name later.
	Soledad bounced around, and then they finally kept trying her to do this and that because she's got the kind of a look they're looking for.
	But she just never...
	I don't know if she's not welcoming.
	Hey, wait a minute.
	John, stop, stop, stop.
	Meeting, meeting, meeting right now.
	Are we crazy?
	We're sending her in the wrong direction.
	She needs to look like Adele.
	Right, she should fatten up.
	Fatten up, that's right.
	Beautiful.
	That's right, but you still need the plunging neckline.
	You need to fatten up.
	It needs to be tight.
	You know, she just needs to be much thicker, but the boobs have to like...
	Because Adele, you look at Adele, she's got plunging neckline.
	And you've got to talk a little skankier.
	They had a thing that was either on 60 Minutes or one of these big news programs where they had some, I don't know how to call it, plus size model.
	Yes, yes, plus size.
	Very gorgeous.
	Yeah, of course, they're beautiful.
	Huge hips.
	Yeah.
	And they were promoting it.
	She was the one, this woman, was the one that was behind the Naples thing where they're trying to get skinny models off the runway.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Any amphetamines and it's hurting the heroin market.
	It's hurting the heroin market.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Yes.
	All right.
	Anyway, that's our advice for today.
	Are you still there?
	Yeah.
	It's nice, quiet.
	It's connected.
	So I actually, because you said she's on right now, and I looked back behind to my telescreen there, and I saw...
	Friggin' former CIA guy Hayden is now doing the rounds.
	So I got a thing from C-SPAN, which I want to get to.
	But first, what I think the reason why he is walking around all the TV shows now is because we've got all these senators and congressmen coming out and talking crap they shouldn't be talking about.
	Here's Mike Rogers with the original Adele of CNN, Candy Crowley.
	Yes or no from you.
	It's a question about drones and the use of them targeting Americans overseas.
	Alawaki, known terrorist but an American citizen as well as his son, were killed.
	You have talked about oversight.
	You think there's plenty of oversight for this drone program.
	Were you told in advance of those two killings?
	For the planning purposes of air strikes against terrorists and enemy combatants overseas, yes.
	These specific men?
	If people make the target list, we know that in advance.
	There's appropriate oversight.
	And then how we target those individuals changes from day to day.
	But airstrikes is certainly a part of that.
	So, apparently they knew about it.
	They were told, if you're on the kill list, then a little bike messenger goes up to the hill to Congress.
	Hey everybody, I got today's kill list!
	It's Tuesday!
	Alright, let's see who's on the list.
	Oh, looks good to me.
	American?
	Yeah, looks good to me.
	What do you say, John?
	Looks good to me?
	Yeah, looks good.
	Let's just kill him.
	So Rand Paul, of course, is not having any of this, and he is the senator from Kentucky's son of Ron Paul.
	I'm not a huge fan of Rand Paul, and I think that he is mocking, mocking, and I'm not sure.
	Man, this guy bugs me.
	He's got a funny look.
	He's like one of those guys with two sets of eyelashes.
	He needs to fatten up like Adele.
	If he fattened up like Adele, he'd have it made.
	So he's basically taking our material and doing it on CNN. Well, you know, the idea that you get a trial before a jury and a judge if you're accused of a crime is something that we've had in our history through English history as well as U.S. history for 800 years.
	It's a very important part of the Bill of Rights due process.
	So what we're talking about is not killing someone with a grenade launcher on their shoulder.
	We're talking about someone eating at a cafe in Boston or in New York and a Hellfire missile comes raining in on them.
	There should be an easy answer from the administration on this.
	They should say, absolutely no, we will not kill Americans in America without an accusation, a trial, and a jury.
	And I'm not talking about people engaged in lethal force.
	I'm talking about people sitting in a cafe having coffee.
	People like this are being killed around the world.
	We should not do this in America.
	And it's inexcusable that the administration will not answer, absolutely no, we will not do this.
	So it's true what he's saying, because we even heard the president himself on the fireside hangout at the Google not saying that he wouldn't kill Americans in America.
	Yeah, in fact, this is the big news this week, because apparently this question has been asked over and over of both Brennan and Obama, and Rand Paul came out and says he is going to filibuster.
	Yes, he's going to stop Brennan.
	And by the way, I think Brennan is the devil.
	You know, he sure looks like it.
	And the armed forces of the United States military...
	They want him out.
	They hate this guy because he's responsible for military personnel dying.
	He stopped the rescue attempts at Benghazi.
	And everyone knows this.
	Everyone's too pussy to come out and say it.
	Rand Paul's too pussy to say it.
	John McCain's too pussy to say it.
	It's just a big bunch of pussies.
	Pussy, pussy, pussy.
	So then we have former CIA Director Hayden, and he was a CIA director during the Bush administration, I think 2005, like three years or whatever.
	And he's on C-SPAN. He's being interviewed by a former CNN prestitute, and is at the Washington Institute.
	You know, with the Washington Institute, just one of these drinking clubs, you would call it.
	Yeah, another drinking club.
	Yeah.
	But this is wonderful stuff, because C-SPAN broadcast this in its entirety.
	And by the way, here's a tip for you producers.
	One of our producers, very kindly, if you go to c-spanvideo.org, c-spanvideo.org, When you see one of these C-SPAN either interviews or whatever it is, you can clip, you can make clips in their interface.
	And you can label these clips.
	You can put comments in.
	And it's really funny because this producer...
	And I had seen the thing live as it was taking place.
	I'm like, oh, I've got to go back and find some clips for Sunday.
	And he went in.
	He created a couple of clips.
	Some were way too long.
	I'm looking for one-minute clips.
	And so I couldn't use the really long ones.
	But he labeled them.
	You know, like Hayden, lying bastard, and all this stuff.
	It was really funny.
	So I'm sure that'll get removed eventually.
	But you can really help the show by going into C-SPAN, creating the clips, sending me the link...
	And then all I have to do is just record the clips.
	So it's very, very helpful when you do this.
	It's very helpful because they have the closed captions.
	You know, they have the transcript that rolls along.
	The C-SPAN website is, besides the video player being a piece of crap, otherwise is very, very helpful for the program.
	So first we have to have Hayden deny that the drone program even exists.
	The fact that CIA does or does not have a drone program.
	It has never been confirmed or denied by my government and I am not about to start tonight.
	We talked about it on that C-SPAN show.
	He discussed it openly.
	No, this is the C-SPAN show.
	No, no, not that one.
	The one where they had the three goofballs up there trying to get out of getting accused of war crimes.
	No, no, he's discussing it, but he will not admit that the CIA runs it.
	This is a very important distinction.
	But the way he denies it stinks.
	But what stinks more is the elitist cocksuckers who are sitting there laughing.
	Oh, that's so funny from the most transparent government in the universe.
	What was your advice as to the government's drone program?
	Kill them, I say.
	That we were faced with an unconventional enemy who rejected both Westphalia, the fact that states do this, and Geneva.
	Rejected Geneva for us, actually rejected Geneva for them, saying that all their adherents were true combatants.
	We were faced with an unprecedented circumstance with the citizens of the republic at risk.
	And therefore, the targeted killing program that has proceeded over two incredibly different administrations, I think, fits all the squares of lawful...
	appropriate, and effective.
	Lawful, appropriate, and effective.
	That's the job.
	It fits.
	Yeah, get the lawful part and try to prove that one.
	Show us the memo!
	So, he went to Europe, and he had to present his same case about it being lawful, appropriate, and effective, yes.
	And they didn't grab him?
	Well, this was apparently when he was still CIA director, so I guess he had his hoods and he was protected.
	And so I want to play this clip because the Europeans, of course, totally disagree with the whole drone program.
	But the humor this guy uses, which is of a vile sexual...
	Undertone.
	Not even undertone.
	It is so dumb.
	But it shows you how these elitist shits actually think.
	So I go to the German embassy in the spring of 2007.
	Germans are in the chair of the EU. So the German ambassadors got all the ambassadors to the United States from the EU countries there for lunch.
	All right?
	So they're doing a European huddle.
	That's a sports metaphor.
	They're doing a European hoe.
	Is that what he said?
	Yeah.
	I couldn't hear it.
	And then he says, that's a sports metaphor.
	Oh.
	Oh, jeez.
	So, because, of course, what they actually do...
	This is advice to everybody.
	If you're not a comedian, don't do comedy.
	But if you're a politician who spends the majority of his time traveling abroad buying hookers, don't make jokes about it.
	Because I'm accusing you now, Hayden, of doing that for this lame-ass joke.
	And the douche-knuckle audience.
	They have an American come in to be the luncheon entertainment.
	Okay?
	So I gave a speech and I figured, hey, got good friends here.
	Let's have a little fun.
	Let's talk about renditions, detentions, interrogations.
	This is his dinner speech, by the way, that they pay him $100,000 for, I'm sure.
	I don't think he's got that level, but it's possible.
	50.
	At least 50.
	Yeah, 50 minimum.
	I agree with that.
	And he'll just stand up and just talk and walk around the table, and he'll do the shtick.
	Right, right.
	Say hi.
	Yeah, yeah.
	50 grand, for sure.
	Shake some hands.
	No, I'm sorry to be flipped, but I wanted them to understand our thinking.
	Now, I know they didn't agree with our thinking, but I wanted them to understand it.
	I had a great speech writing staff, but this is one I really did a lot of work on my own.
	Oh, you did some work!
	Page two or three, I said to the gathered European diplomats, let me tell you what I believe, my agency believes, my government believes, and I believe my nation believes.
	We are a nation at war.
	We're at war with Al-Qaeda and its affiliates.
	This war is global in scope.
	And the only way I can fulfill my legal and moral responsibilities to my citizens is to take this fight to that enemy wherever they may be.
	Four sentences.
	War, Al-Qaeda, global, take the fight.
	There wasn't another country in the room who agreed with that.
	War, Al-Qaeda, global, take the fight.
	That's the four sentences.
	That's his entire PowerPoint, by the way.
	They not only rejected those four sentences for them, they did not believe in the legitimacy of those four sentences for us.
	And so, this yay or nay on...
	Targeted killings and drone strikes is rooted in the national perception of what is going on here.
	Ah, I'm sorry.
	It's about the perception.
	This is why he's out there.
	It's all about the psychological perception of killing people with drones.
	Our national perception, again, endorsed by two incredibly different presidents, is that we are at war and that we can use the laws, not the unlawfulness, but the laws of armed conflict, To defend our citizens.
	That's kind of narrowly legal.
	That's kind of focused only on effectiveness.
	There is a broader issue.
	There is a very important issue of the long-term effects of our actions even if they are legitimate and effective.
	So then he goes into the whole blowback thing, etc.
	But this is, I think, the best explanation anyone has done about what is really going on here is the necessity to convince the public, not just the American public, but the global public, that we are at war.
	And this is why, of course, it doesn't compute, and we always say, oh, well, we've decimated Al-Qaeda, but there's still the affiliates and the adherents, another fantastic word.
	Supporters.
	Yeah, the fans.
	Fan base.
	The fan base, the fan club.
	It's like Taylor Swift's fan club.
	They have a newsletter, all of this stuff.
	So then, of course, we'll wrap this up with him explaining, because we've been expecting something like the FISA court, Where you'll have some judge who will be appointed by the president who will rubber stamp in the FISA court as the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act, where it's like, oh, we can legally wiretap you and listen to you and bug your bedroom and your bathroom because you might be talking to some foreign agent.
	I talk to foreigners all the time who live in foreign countries, so I'm probably bugged.
	We'll have a judge rubber stamp the use of drones, and that'll be enough.
	That's the oversight.
	But no, no, no, no, no.
	The true way we're going to go, I think, is revealed in this bit by Hayden.
	...knows what the correct course of action should be.
	I'm going to do a couple of other questions from the audience, and then I'm going to invite you to go to the microphone if you want to ask the general question directly.
	I'm sorry.
	I should have clipped this part out.
	And let's mix it up a little bit here.
	It was a shield question.
	This is from George from the School of Media and Public Affairs.
	How do you feel about the use of drones to kill American citizens without a proper trial by jury?
	I'm okay.
	You're okay.
	Yeah, I'm okay.
	No.
	I'm all good.
	I'm okay legally.
	I'm okay operationally.
	But I also know, you've made some references to my previous lives and controversial programs, I also know that a narrow base of lawfulness and even effectiveness are not sufficient in the American political system.
	For our democracy to do anything for a long period of time.
	You can get away with the one-off, with narrow legalness, lawfulness, and effectiveness.
	Which is exactly what's happening right now.
	It's like we got away with Al-Awlaki and the other guy, and we're throwing his son.
	He was a waste.
	16-year-olds, teenagers are a pain in the ass, pimply bastards.
	So we blew that kid up.
	So now the base is not there anymore, so what are we going to do?
	But if you're going to do it sustained...
	You do need political consensus.
	And so, although I think the administration has been correct, I do think it needs to be a bit more open, and it's trying to do that.
	The president made the promise in the same speech you just played the clip from, to be more transparent with this, so that we can have the adult public discussion about this, and so that there's a comfort level.
	Is there going to be a judicial review?
	No.
	No?
	This is not...
	This is not the business of courts.
	This is armed conflict.
	This belongs in the hands of the two political branches.
	So then what should you have?
	Well, then declare war, you douchebag.
	Hold on, hold on, hold on.
	You're asking for an idea?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	A commission, all right?
	Seven people, four from the Congress, two from each party, three from the executive branch.
	They review all the...
	And a keg of beer and five lines of blow.
	...this activity.
	They don't pre-approve it.
	They review it, and they report to both political branches with their findings.
	And if you pick the right people, you know, prominent Americans that people trust.
	Let's see.
	Put Imold on there.
	Who else are we going to put on the board, John, on the kill panel?
	I think Imold.
	Yeah, Imold would be good.
	How about Gates?
	Bill Gates.
	I think Zuckerberg.
	Zuckerberg.
	Zuckerberg is the guy.
	Zuck.
	Zuck the drone.
	Secretary Powell.
	Oh, Powell.
	Secretary Perry.
	Who's Secretary Perry?
	Secretary Perry?
	Perry is secretary of what?
	Folks have impeccable credentials.
	That would give you an extra degree of oversight that might give our political structure confidence that as tough as this is, as troubling as it might be, It's needed, at least for now.
	All right, so I believe that is the way we're going to go, is seven people on the board.
	We'll have Zuckerberg on there.
	We get Immelt.
	Maybe not Immelt.
	Maybe we need someone a little more.
	Colin Powell, I think he's played out.
	I don't think he's the right guy anymore.
	No, he's done.
	Who's Secretary Perry?
	I don't know.
	There was a Secretary of Defense Perry, but I can't seem to find any comments.
	William Perry?
	William Perry?
	That would be William Perry.
	Well, maybe it is William.
	Maybe they're talking about William.
	Well, yeah.
	Because they keep giving their old titles.
	Like, you know, they still talk about President Clinton.
	Right.
	Mr.
	President.
	He's not the president anymore.
	Why do they do that?
	Right.
	It's like some sort of, what are we, the British Empire?
	And you have all these honorary things.
	You know, you've been the queen, so you're always the queen.
	Yeah.
	Well, I guess you would be in that case, but just beside the point.
	You know, he's not the president anymore, former president.
	But they still call him president.
	Yeah, Perry was under Bill Clinton.
	Oh, okay, I get it.
	That guy.
	Yeah, so they want to have one Secretary of Defense who was Republican.
	So we're going to balance it.
	It's going to be fair and balanced.
	But I think Zuckerberg is great because that will get the kids.
	And by the way, it's not a pre-approval.
	It's after the fact.
	So the drone goes, the citizen gets droned, and then they have oversight.
	Like, oh, was that a fair kill?
	Yeah, I guess that was fair.
	We'll have a little meeting, bring in the beer, seven people so we can never have a split vote.
	It's like a Supreme Court, I guess.
	Supreme Court of death by drone.
	How about Barbara Walters?
	Put her on there.
	Or the, what's her name, the has-been that ended up on Current TV, Joy Behar.
	No, no, no, the meeting will go on forever.
	No, not Joy Behar.
	We want to get in and out.
	We don't want to be sitting around forever in this stupid meeting.
	No, I think Zuck is great.
	We need someone withstanding.
	Someone, you know, someone...
	Well, we'll work on that, obviously.
	The troll again.
	And you're up to date with Drone Nation, everybody, here on the best podcasts in the universe in the morning.
	Yeah, that's a good one.
	That was a good segment, I have to say.
	We have to do that more often.
	Well, we'll burn this on No Agenda CDs.
	I think NoAgendaCD.com is doing a lot.
	Yeah, just the thing on drones would be a good little CD. I think people would get a kick out of it.
	And you can throw it like a drone after you're done.
	See if you can cut someone's head off if you're good.
	So I want to get back on the Pope thing for a second.
	Yeah, let's get on the Pope.
	I just got this one little clip which just dropped in a new little bomb.
	And apparently the Italian media is going after this.
	Yeah, I've heard this.
	The Pope quitting in a big way.
	I'm glad you got a clip.
	Yeah, I'm glad you got a clip.
	Pope Benedict XVI praying with cardinals on the last day of Lenten religious services.
	But outside that spiritual haven, a storm is brewing.
	The Vatican is lashing out at the Italian media for a string of what they call, quote, defamatory falsified reports.
	It is deplorable that as we draw closer to the time of the beginning of the conclave and the cardinal electors will be held in conscience and before God to freely indicate their choice, that there be a widespread distribution of often unverified, unverifiable, or completely false news stories.
	Italian newspapers in recent days have suggested a secret dossier prepared for the Pope by three cardinals who investigated leaked Vatican documents in 2012.
	The report alleges a series of scandals involving sex, money, and power, even suggesting a, quote, shadowy gay lobby in the Vatican.
	There's speculation in the Italian media that the content of the dossier is what caused Pope Benedict to resign.
	This is not about suing and legal action right now.
	It's a call to truthfulness and authenticity of the journalism profession, which is very important.
	The Pope has said he doesn't have, quote, the strength of mind and body to continue his role.
	But the next pontic will still have to navigate a minefield of controversy, including sex abuse within the church allegedly covered up.
	I would say you can't evangelize if the house isn't in order.
	The three cardinals who investigated the leaked documents are expected to meet with Pope Benedict on Monday.
	Meanwhile, the pontiff will hold his final Sunday blessing tomorrow.
	Pedo Bear!
	Now, there's an interesting thing about this, this guy says.
	Obviously, they need the Curry Dvorak Consulting Company to straighten out their PR efforts.
	Group, it's group.
	You don't say the following.
	The guy says, he says, these reports from these newspapers, they're either unverified, unverifiable, or completely false.
	In other words, they're true, you just can't prove it.
	They're true, except there's unverifiable ones.
	In other words, most of them are true.
	There is a couple false items in here, but for the most part...
	You're right on the money.
	You're right on the money, but you can't use this because it's not fair, because you can't verify it.
	So they got it from sources in the Vatican.
	So I thought the gay cabal was interesting, because I've run into...
	I've heard this theory I've heard as well, the gay cabal.
	Go ahead.
	Tell me who you ran into.
	This is not just the gay cabal, the lesbian cabal that's in the Department of Homeland Security that we've talked about on the show, which has been apparently harassing men mercilessly.
	But any cabal, I mean, any time a group, any sort of group gets kind of a foothold in an organization.
	It's horrible, rampant.
	Tall people cabal, you see you go to an organization, everyone's tall.
	Or you go to the offices of Oracle.
	There's not a woman in there that's not like some gorgeous model.
	Beautiful and, because they used to be my client, all of the men are total douchebags.
	And they're all like, hey, look at that skirt.
	Beauty in the douchebag.
	Yeah, exactly.
	It's culture.
	It's a corporate culture thing.
	So you get a foothold in an organization, any organization, government, Obviously, which we have at DHS or the church, a huge operations, massive.
	You end up with people hiring their buddies or hiring people they like or, you know, I like the way you look or, hey, he's one of us.
	Or like pedophiles.
	And you end up with a disaster.
	Yeah, this is what happened to the Justice Department in the Netherlands with all the pedophiles running around.
	Yeah, there you go.
	Exactly.
	They hire their buddies and then you're all blackmailing each other about what you do, whether it's harassing men, harassing women, you know, stealing, doing drugs, whatever.
	Nobody in the Catholic Church was blackmailing anybody.
	They were just wink-winking.
	Well, it's the church.
	I mean, this cardinal that's the United States, for his name, Murray or whatever he is, the guy they don't want going back there to vote, is one of the worst case scenarios, that guy.
	Oh, the guy who covered up?
	Did he cover up?
	Yeah, he covered up like 200 things.
	The new Cardinal that came in even said he was a douchebag.
	He shouldn't even be in the...
	Cardinal douchebag.
	Yeah, that's good.
	Cardinal douchebag of California.
	According to the ITCCS.org, which is the International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State, which seems like a real spiffy outfit.
	They say Pope Benedict resigned to avoid arrest and seizure of church wealth by Easter.
	Cardinal Mahoney's his name.
	Mahoney, right.
	Yeah.
	Anyway, go on.
	So they're saying that diplomatic note was issued to the Vatican just prior to the Pope's resignation.
	Because, I don't know.
	You know what?
	I don't know.
	I really don't know.
	Well, we'll find out.
	We'll never find out.
	And by the way, the Italian slaves are voting today.
	Yeah.
	I hope they vote the comedian's buddies in.
	You know, I've heard things about Beppe Grillo, which is not so good, that this guy is actually a shill, and under the guise of ha-ha-ha-ho-ho, he's going to bring in so much austerity, people will be, you know, just dying on the street.
	Yeah, that doesn't ring right.
	It doesn't sound right.
	What do you mean?
	I mean, if he's going to be promising one thing and he delivers something completely the opposite, it would be like Obama.
	And they'd run him out.
	It would never happen.
	They'd run him out.
	They'd drone him.
	And Berlusconi, I think, I'm telling you Berlusconi still has a shot.
	Yeah.
	We'll see.
	He does have his followers.
	Yeah.
	Well, he's got the media is what he has.
	Yeah, he owns it.
	He owns everything.
	But the rule in Italy is they have no publishing on polls, etc.
	Obviously, that influences people, which is a good rule to have, especially if you've got one guy owning all the media.
	But that's kind of what we should have here in America.
	We don't have that.
	We have...
	You know, the media all owned by one corporation or two.
	And we just incessantly publish all kinds of polls and bullcrap and lies.
	It's just what we do.
	I think there's another vote somewhere.
	I think Cyprus is voting today.
	There's several votes going on, but good luck to everybody over there in Italia Euroland.
	You'll get what you deserve.
	Not really covered here in the United States of Gitmo Nation, the protest in Madrid.
	Do you see the pictures of that?
	Oh yeah, huge.
	Huge.
	The Spanish are just going ballistic.
	They've been protesting left and right.
	Millions of people, essentially, they will not cover it in the United States.
	They don't want to give anybody any ideas because, in fact, if you look at the shadow stats guy out of San Francisco and what he says is going on with the unemployment rate, which the government figures show it slowly dropping, his main number, the shadow stat number, is still going up.
	It's almost at 25% right now.
	True unemployment in the United States, which is about what it is in Spain.
	These are mainly young people who are at 50%.
	Oh, they're at 50 or 60%.
	Yeah, they're completely exposed.
	Just crazy.
	We probably have a number like that for young people.
	We just don't have anyone with the guts to publish it.
	Yeah, I'm pretty sure we do.
	You know, it's funny, you know, so many people just come by and young people like, hey, you know, they see us moving in.
	Hey, can I help out?
	You know, 12 bucks an hour.
	I'll do whatever you want.
	Which is better than minimum wage.
	What's this?
	Minimum wage!
	I'd forgotten about that.
	That's They Might Be Giants, who I'll be interviewing on stage here at South by Southwest.
	Is that from one of their songs?
	Yes.
	Oh, yeah.
	Those guys are very funny.
	They were kind of like way ahead of their time.
	Still are.
	They're probably 10 years older than I am now.
	I don't know how old they are.
	They might be.
	So anyway, you see a lot of...
	They actually might be tall, too.
	No, they might be Giants, but I don't think they're tall.
	Hey-oh!
	In the morning!
	So we have very low unemployment in Texas, but I will say that it's not like people aren't going to get no golden watch in 20 years.
	This is gigs.
	People are running around, doing stuff, jumping from here to there.
	Food trucks.
	Man, we got the food trucks right nearby on South Congress?
	Food trucks are all over the country.
	They've taken off like wildfire because people can't afford to open a real restaurant.
	Some of the food trucks, in fact, a lot of these shows on Discovering America are about food trucks.
	And food trucks, which I... You know, I think it really began with the taco truck in the West Coast and then evolved into the food truck, which is also big in Europe, apparently, are guys with one or two specialties and they can sell these things and actually make a good living once they get to pay off the truck, which is about $100,000.
	Well, so we went to the...
	Right off South Congress, right near...
	The Cross Street is like Monroe, across from the South Congress Café.
	There's kind of like a playground and there's, I'd say, eight or nine food trucks.
	One of them is actually, I love this because we saw this happen in San Francisco.
	It's a yellow container.
	It's literally just a container.
	They've cut out a door, cut out a little hole for the chimney and they're just selling grilled cheese.
	And the line is off the hook.
	So, I've been thinking...
	By the way, I was watching one of these things.
	Did you know the grilled cheese sandwich...
	It was actually an invention during the Great Depression.
	It was a cheap way to eat dinner.
	There you go.
	And when you send the pictures, one of our producers sent us a photo that he took at the store of all the mac and cheese boxes.
	Yeah.
	On many of them it says mac and cheese dinner.
	But do you see where I'm going with this, John?
	Yeah.
	I'm telling you, we're going to do food trucks, right?
	We're going to do real simple containers and Yellow, it's the mac and cheese.
	It's that mac and cheese.
	Everybody deserves their mac and cheese.
	You slaves can get used to mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	And I think we actually say it that way.
	We have mac and cheese, Curry Dvorak Consulting's mac and cheese, cheap macaroni and cheap cheddar melted together.
	Yum.
	Yum.
	Or just do hashtag LGY. I'm telling you, it's a bonanza, John.
	They're standing in line for the grilled cheese.
	Can you imagine if we actually did mac and cheese?
	Across from San Francisco is that American Grilled Cheese Company or whatever it's called.
	Yes!
	It's a bonanza.
	The place was packed for people that were eating essentially, let's get it real now, depression food.
	Depression food.
	Depression food.
	And for seven bucks?
	They're paying seven bucks for depression food.
	Yeah, it's unbelievable.
	I'm telling you, mac and cheese and we'll throw in some bits of bacon as a specialty.
	Add bacon a dollar.
	That's a big sign.
	Add bacon.
	I'm telling you, I have not seen a mac and cheese food truck.
	And if we ever want to really make it rich, this is the way to go.
	Because I was talking to the girls at the Dosa truck, which is quite tasty, but Dosa, you ever had a Dosa?
	I don't even know what you're talking about.
	It's like a mattress, like a...
	You know, like the foam rubber on the inside of a mattress?
	So they kind of put some goop in there with some rice and then some chutney, and it's gluten-free and whatever.
	Oh, here it is.
	D-O-S-A, DOSA. Yeah, there's some images.
	It's like a burrito.
	Yeah, but the burrito thing is like mattress foam.
	Kind of like, what's the restaurant that you eat with your hands where people are starving in that country?
	Morocco?
	No, no.
	Other country.
	Hawaii?
	No.
	I want to say, not...
	Oh, come on.
	Not Vietnam.
	I'm looking at this thing.
	So you get this big piece of whatever the hell it is.
	It's got something in it.
	Yeah, it's magical.
	You get the dip.
	You get some dips.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Hey, oh, good idea from the chat room.
	We can do mac and cheese with Spam.
	You could add Spam, yeah.
	Yeah, add Spam, $2.
	Okay, dosa is a fermented crepe or pancake made from rice batter and black lentils.
	It's not.
	It's indigenous in a stable southern India.
	It's mattress foam.
	Ethiopia!
	Thank you, Tight End.
	It's popular in Sri Lanka.
	Ethiopia is what I was saying.
	If you go to an Ethiopian restaurant and you get that same mattress foam, because you don't have utensils at the Ethiopian restaurant?
	Oh yeah, I've had this dish at an Indian restaurant.
	Foam.
	So anyway.
	So I think there's a real business here for us.
	Yeah, I think the mac and cheese truck would probably pack them in.
	In fact, what are we waiting around for?
	I don't know.
	We should just get on the stick right away.
	Mickey's like, Ethiopia.
	Thank you, darling.
	Ethiopia!
	Don't you know where people are starving?
	It's Ethiopia!
	Douche!
	They're always starving in Ethiopia.
	I don't know why they just don't move out.
	Or eat some steak.
	Something like that.
	I'm going to show myself all by donating to No Agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh yeah, that'd be fab.
	Move out!
	Minimum wage!
	I'm loving that one.
	Well, hopefully our listeners are above minimum wage.
	We'll start with a few thank yous to Jason Stevens in Las Vegas.
	Lost Wages, Nevada, $111.11 without comment.
	Justin Fishin, he has a subscription, so he's giving us $111.11 commonly.
	Justin Fishin, Cloquet, Minnesota, Minnesota Nuts.
	And he's not at $111.11.
	He wants a shot of Little Girl Yay Karma for you both.
	Yay!
	Yay!
	You've got karma.
	Dean Evans in Leicester.
	Just discovered the show a few weeks ago.
	He came in with $101.
	Just a few weeks ago, he just discovered the show and wants to give us value for value for such a great job you guys do.
	Thank you.
	Just watch, you know, we have people that are watching from show one and they admit it and then they give us like, you know, they never give us anything.
	Also prompted me to use a domain I requested.
	I finally used a domain that he registered some time ago.
	A-hole.
	That's A-holes.
	It's A-H-O-L dot E-S. Wait, does that point to us?
	Hold on.
	A-H-O-L dot E-S? Let me see.
	It's a Spanish.
	That's a Spanish domain.
	But it wouldn't necessarily get.
	Oh, no.
	He has a whole cool site here.
	It's the Top Ten A-Holes.
	Oh, and to spread the formula by highlighting A-Holes around.
	Oh, there we go.
	We've got a little banner right in the middle of his site.
	Thank you.
	He's got a-holes.
	Top ten a-holes.
	Number one, George W. Bush.
	Number two, L. Ron Hubbard.
	Number three, Pope Benedict XVI. Number four, Mitt Romney.
	Number five, Sarah Palin.
	Number six, Lance Armstrong.
	Seven, Tom Cruise.
	Eight, David Cameron.
	Nine, Barack Obama.
	And ten, Pierce Morgan.
	I think we need work on the list.
	I would flip that upside down.
	Yeah, I agree.
	I think your list is inverted.
	Yeah, your list is wrong.
	But anyway, thank you.
	This is a very nice thank you, and welcome to the family.
	Welcome to the No Agenda Producing family.
	Yeah.
	And he wants a karma to get the ball rolling there.
	You've got karma.
	And let me see, do we have any new a-holes?
	Yeah, Hayden.
	Hayden should be on there.
	Hayden should be on the list.
	I will think of...
	Oh, Brennan.
	I mean, come on.
	Come on, Brennan.
	I mean, O'Brennan.
	Oh, Brennan.
	John O'Brennan.
	Yeah, please.
	These dead guys and other a-holes.
	It's meaningless.
	Sir Eric Bowdenstab in Lauderdale, Minnesota.
	$100.
	No need to read this on the show.
	Oh, okay.
	Thanks.
	Love you.
	Mean it.
	He does no call-outs.
	No karma.
	Just a note of thanks, he says.
	He's just proud to be a knight.
	He says he's proud to be a knight.
	He should be.
	Thank you.
	Anonymous in Randwick, New South Wales.
	I think if someone's anonymous, you don't read the note.
	Some anonymous people want you to read the note as anonymous.
	Okay.
	He said he had a deja vu moment recently.
	I said I may have found a forerunner to the No Agenda show.
	This is kind of interesting.
	The show's thinking about media assassination from the 1890s.
	Yeah, actually, I saw this email and I went to get the book.
	That's an old book by Hilaire Belloc.
	And according to J.C. Buzzkill Jr., this was a good friend of C.K. Chesterton.
	And I guess Bernard Shaw, there's a group of these guys.
	It was like a little drinking club.
	Yeah.
	And I guess they were unhappy with the bullcrap media in 1890.
	So we look back at this.
	Imagine.
	Imagine.
	I changed nothing.
	Yeah, but imagine they had to sit around.
	I think they got to drink a lot more than we do.
	Oh, yeah.
	Waiting for the next newspaper to come out.
	Share a beer.
	Yeah.
	You and I, we do this twice a week, three hours each time.
	Yeah, they probably only wrote a book every so often.
	Yeah.
	Or they published it.
	The Free Press is the name of the book from B-E-L-L-O-C, 1890s.
	It's probably available on Amazon.
	It's on Gutenberg.
	It's on Gutenberg.
	Just get the Gutenberg thing and download it to your Kindle.
	And the book cites examples that are now little known, which is probably everything gets forgotten.
	We have to remind ourselves of some of the stuff we've come up with.
	Yeah, we do.
	So I got the book.
	Of course, we've been still unpacking boxes and setting up a shop here in the hideout.
	But it's on my reading list, so we'll get to it.
	Stockholm, New Jersey, Peter McConnell, 8888.
	Greetings from Suzhou.
	8888 in Chinese is pronounced ba-ba-ba-ba.
	Oh, well, we pronounce it like this.
	It's also the Mandarin word for father, and we're expecting our first human resource in about three months.
	Little girl, yay, karma.
	Thank you.
	Oh, that's very nice.
	Hold on a second.
	Little girl, yay, karma.
	Yay!
	There you go.
	Rockin' and rollin'.
	You've got karma.
	There you go.
	It shows the end of the Silk Road.
	They do all kinds of cool silk stuff there.
	If you wanted your portrait in silk, they'll make it.
	Yay.
	Yap.
	Geelhoot.
	Geelhoot.
	Yellow hat is what that means.
	In Oudeland.
	Oudeland.
	Oudeland.
	Is that okay?
	Yeah, very good.
	You are so getting laid if you ever go back to Holland.
	77.
	Not only was he a cute man, but he spoke the language as well.
	Oudeland.
	Oudeland.
	For the love of Livia, who will give her 31st birthday on the 27th, and for the love of the show for the both of us, and he has some suggestions on the notes.
	Yeah, he's got Climagate LGY Karma.
	We'll do that.
	Here we go.
	To the gate, to the gate, to the Climagate.
	Yay!
	You've got Karma.
	Now, we've got our segment here, which has shrunk down to two donors.
	Oh, good.
	Good riddance to everybody.
	69!
	69!
	I'm telling you, everyone's like, yeah.
	This is exactly, exactly the nightmare that I had about the donation segment is we'll tell everyone, hey, man, we've got to shorten this up.
	And everyone's just like, oh, well, screw it.
	Then I'm not going to donate.
	Oh, 69?
	That's annoyingly long.
	Boom.
	Done.
	Thanks, John.
	Here we go.
	Great.
	Sir John, you said you didn't care.
	Sir John Tirada in Pasadena, California, 69.
	I cheer up, Adam, and John is very contrary when I listen to him on DHM Plug.
	Give karma to yourselves.
	Yeah.
	You've got karma.
	That's exactly what I was afraid of.
	And Andrew Wargo in Wynton, Maine.
	6969.
	Andy, the ANCAP Wynton, Maine.
	Greeting from Gitmo Nation.
	Landlocked Salmon.
	I've been a boner, or a boner, he says, since the summer of 2011, so please give me a douchebag.
	Douchebag!
	I heard a listener donate from the town next to mine, so I took it as a sign to donate to the best podcast in the universe.
	That's pretty cool.
	He's next door to me.
	You should do a meet-up.
	Yeah, big meet-up in May.
	Here we are.
	Let's have a pizza.
	Ah, he's next door, but you can't get there from here.
	Value for value is the way of the future.
	Maybe, maybe not.
	All right, he needs some job karma.
	All right, we'll give that to him.
	And that wraps up.
	We've got karma.
	That wraps up our segment.
	69!
	69, dudes!
	Chad Adden in Clarendon Hills, Illinois.
	Double nickels on the dime.
	Need some job karma so I can provide for my wife and five-month-old human resource.
	Keeping it short.
	Right on.
	Here's your karma.
	Hope it happens for you.
	You've got karma.
	Christopher Walker, 5510.
	Chris Ruddy, 5510.
	Where was Chris Walker?
	I'm getting confused.
	No, Christopher Walker.
	And then Chris Ruddy, Sir Chris, Sir Crush.
	Chris Ruddy and then Chris Witten.
	This actually makes...
	It's weird that we'd have all these Chrises on this spreadsheet like this.
	Oh.
	Coincidence?
	I think not!
	And now that there was three of them.
	Mm-hmm.
	Chris Witten in Millboro, Virginia.
	It just says value for value.
	Private Huff in New Jersey, $5,492.
	The amount is $5,492 because 33.33 times 33.33, 33 to the 333 power.
	No, it's to the power.
	So 3.33 to the power of 3.33 is $5,492.
	Longtime boner douchebag.
	I haven't donated since special episode 200, though I did miss about 200 episodes because I swore off politics.
	What's that?
	We don't do politics.
	For the benefit of my sanity.
	Sadly, the last election cycle sucked me back into your world of pipelines, drones, mac and cheese.
	I can't believe Adam brought up Rex.
	I can also not believe in the very same moment he did so, I was making some changes to a Rex script at work.
	Wait a minute.
	What fabulous Fortune 500 company is running on Rex?
	IBM. I'm a senior programmer at a large financial processing firm.
	Such a shocking, mind-blowing coincidence could only be a sign from the flying spaghetti monster.
	Which, yes, indeed, the Pastafarian religion.
	I got several of these notes.
	It always starts off like this.
	I can't believe!
	I was surprised!
	You didn't know about Pastafarianism!
	I think we've discussed it on the show.
	I mentioned the spaghetti monster.
	It had to be it.
	Yeah.
	He needs a de-douching karma shot with a splash of little gory.
	You've been de-douched.
	Yay!
	You've got karma.
	Fernando Yan is in Arcadia, California, 50.
	Likes a new job karma?
	I have a recommendation which you should send to NAfeedback at Outlook.com.
	How long have you been on the internet?
	How long have you been doing broadcasting?
	You know that people will not use this.
	It's like people never put the right subject line in.
	They never click on the right thing.
	That's why I put it into the newsletter if they would just read the newsletter that they subscribe to.
	They read the newsletter and think, oh great, I'll send John a note about this.
	This never works.
	And a feedback.
	Kyle Fauer is our last.
	Well, give him.
	He needs a week.
	Weak.
	What does he need?
	Well, nothing.
	You've got to read the note first.
	No, I'm not going to read the notes.
	Limit the $50 donation on 150 characters.
	It should be $140 that you read on the air.
	For every additional $10, you get another 10 characters.
	That's a little different.
	It's not a bad idea.
	But it requires us actually counting.
	And that would constitute work.
	They didn't even notice.
	If he will be trying to game us.
	Maybe that would be a good idea.
	You know, I just want value for value.
	You know, it's like, if you like what we're doing, then support us.
	I got a crazy note, by the way.
	Let's just get this over with.
	Kyle Bauer, 50 bucks.
	Then we're done.
	We got no more.
	No, that's...
	No, I'm telling you, the solution is exactly what I was afraid of.
	Like, we'll make it short, Curry.
	Here.
	We'll give you no money.
	Thank you.
	Well, you made the segment short.
	That's great.
	Thank you all very much.
	And please do not go to...
	Do not pass go.
	Do not support this.
	Enjoy your program for free.
	It's kind of like mac and cheese.
	Right?
	It's depression programming.
	Right?
	It is depression programming.
	It's depression programming and you get it for free.
	For free.
	Depression programming.
	Do not feel like you have to support us in any way.
	Please.
	Don't.
	Don't do it.
	So I got a note from one of our producers.
	Do you remember the guy who said he wanted job karma for the Hacienda?
	Yeah, that place that he's fixing up in Mexico or someplace.
	Yeah, but the Hacienda...
	I looked up his note.
	Hola, Carlos, and something in the spreadsheet mangled that name.
	Greetings from the Yucatan.
	Today is my 10-year wedding anniversary.
	I feel guilty about a weekend, so here's 50 bucks.
	Please give me a deducing some work karma for HaciendaXXIM.com.
	Thanks from Jeremy Falk.
	And I got a number of people who said, Oh my God, the guy who owns that Hacienda is Robert Gao.
	Robert Gao was pretty much the inventor of Skull and Bones.
	So he ran George...
	You mean the inventor of Skull and Bones?
	Is that a game?
	No.
	He was a huge Skull and Bones guy with George W. Bush.
	Oh, you're talking about the club.
	The club, exactly.
	He also ran Bush's phony oil company.
	What was it?
	Zapata?
	Zapata.
	Zapata.
	So, people are saying, hey, what is that?
	And I'm saying, if the New World Order is donating, you guys are a bunch of cheap bastards.
	Really pissing me off.
	This is really not okay.
	Zvorak.org slash NA. It's your first day, first day!
	I don't know what it's like!
	Yay!
	Tim DeMorian says, happy birthday to his brother Paul, turns 33 on the 24th, and that is no coincidence that that is today.
	Sir Michael Miller says, congrats to Rhino the Bearded, of course, the 00 show, and Jaap Geelhoed.
	It says happy birthday to Olivia, who turns 34 on the 27th.
	And I will say a shout-out to Tainted, or as I like to say, Tight End, who celebrates on the 27th.
	Tight End in the chat room.
	Happy birthday from all your buddies here at the No Agenda Show!
	We are!
	And when you donate up to an amount of $1,000, then you become a knight or a dame at the No Agenda Roundtable.
	That includes a ring.
	We have rings being picked up.
	I guess Eric the Shill has reappropriated his spot.
	Did we have confirmation this is happening, John?
	No.
	No?
	Okay.
	Well, I'm just going to hope.
	Which means the last rings are going out.
	If you have one coming, just double-check it.
	Rings at noagendanation.com.
	Please, rings at noagendanation.com for all questions about your rings.
	If you're a broadcaster, you know that won't work.
	Rings at noagendanation.com.
	Rings at noagendanation.com.
	And...
	Then we're going to pins, which will be coded with...
	No, we don't have that set up yet.
	Anyway, if you can grab your blade, we're going to...
	He had a whole name he wanted.
	Do you have your blade?
	No.
	What's that?
	I don't know.
	Where did that come from?
	Sissy, step on forward!
	From Toronto, Ontario, thank you so much for your support of the No Agenda Show, the best podcast in the universe, and I shall knight you as requested.
	Sir, sizzle out of Gitmo Barney back bacon!
	Welcome to the No Agenda Roundtable.
	You know what's here for you.
	We have the following lined up.
	Hookers and blowers, red boys and chardonnay, hot pants and booze, wenches and beer, rubin-esque women and rosé, gaiches and sake, vodka and vanilla, vong hits and bourbon, sparkling cider and escorts, and of course, the illustrious Mutton and mead.
	And remember, I think we should add to the mix now.
	You slaves can get used to mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese. Mac and cheese.
	Macaroni and cheese.
	Cheddar melted together.
	Mac and cheese. Mac and cheese. Mac and cheese.
	I like that bit the best. - There you go.
	If you really want to make it cheap, you get the craft stuff.
	Velveeta, I think.
	Velveeta.
	Why would anybody feed their kids that stuff?
	I've actually made mac and cheese for the kids, but I make a gourmet version with a very high-end cheddar, some fresh cream, some spices, maybe a touch of nutmeg, some pepper and salt, and an expensive Italian pasta.
	When's the last time you went to the P.O. box?
	Oh, well I meant to go to the P.O. Box.
	Unfortunately, I go there on Saturday to get the old mail, right?
	The question was a little simpler than that.
	I go twice a week.
	Twice a week?
	Yeah.
	Oh, we've got someone complaining.
	Yeah.
	I go there on Saturday, and someone has stuffed a box into the P.O. box that's bigger than the box, and I can't pull it out.
	So I have to go now, later in the week, and wait in a miserable line.
	This particular post office always has this huge line.
	And even if there's three people there, I'll be there an hour.
	So don't expect anything from the P.O. box for a few days.
	Wow.
	I wonder what it is.
	I was thinking of opening this package up from the out...
	You know, just opening and crushing the box and pulling it out.
	But I figure it could be beer or something like that.
	And then a beer would be all over the fucking place.
	It would be a disaster.
	So, isn't the whole point of having a P.O. box is that this doesn't happen?
	That then the postal service...
	I don't know what idiot at the post office shoved this box in there.
	It's like a giant cork.
	It has clogged the box.
	Well, that makes no sense.
	No, it makes no sense at all.
	And I didn't wait.
	It says fragile all over it because I could see the end of the box.
	Oh, right.
	So I could push it back out.
	Even better.
	I would have pushed it back out onto the floor, but with the words fragile on the box, what am I supposed to do?
	So I have to wait.
	Huh.
	What are they complaining about?
	Tell them to send me a note.
	I'll figure out what it is.
	Let's see.
	Here's a clip.
	Here's a clip.
	So there's three.
	I'm watching some of this VH1. Some of these crazy lights.
	You're watching VH1 now?
	Wait a minute.
	Wait a minute.
	You're watching bacon shows.
	It was a mistake.
	Okay.
	I did get this good clip.
	This is some musicians telling their story of how important their work is.
	Some jazz musicians.
	And the clip is called The Vortex.
	Okay.
	Oh.
	For some reason now, what just happened?
	Wow.
	The clip just literally disappeared.
	Hold on.
	What the hell just happened?
	It's in all caps.
	Yeah, I know.
	I know, but I tried to drag it into the system.
	Oh, here we go.
	We are three shamans on stage offering up a vortex to all the people out there.
	And we're bridging the gap between the spiritual plane and the physical plane.
	And if you want to join us, that's great.
	And if not, that's fine, too.
	We're going to do it anyway.
	And the reason it works is because the vortex is the same in all people.
	And when we go to it inside of ourselves, if the listener goes to it inside of themselves, we're in the same place.
	What is the point of this?
	I would like to know myself.
	What are these guys?
	What is this?
	These weren't musicians explaining their art.
	Do you somehow think that the second half of the show is just meant to play bullshit?
	Yeah.
	I mean, it's okay.
	I mean, it seems like a great place for you to mock me, but I'm not so sure that you can just play crap.
	I'm not mocking you.
	Are you talking about the vortex coming up?
	I think your vortex is no good.
	It's no good.
	Attention all human resources.
	Now entering second half of the show.
	Now entering second half of the show.
	Our fifth story out front, asteroid apocalypse again?
	There you go.
	That's it, second half of the show.
	That was it?
	Didn't we just do this?
	Yeah, asteroid apocalypse again.
	That's all I got.
	Are you having another asteroid come through?
	Yeah, it's just non-stop.
	No, no, actually, good news.
	Officials in Texas announced Thursday state troopers are no longer allowed to open fire on suspects from helicopters.
	They are banning the...
	Have they been shooting at people from choppers?
	Immigrants, yes.
	Apparently they've been shooting at immigrants from helicopters.
	What?
	I'm sorry.
	Undocumented Americans.
	I'm sorry.
	I love it.
	I didn't know this was happening.
	I didn't know that was happening either.
	I thought they only went on wolf hunts in Alaska.
	I think that's great.
	And they complain about Sarah Palin.
	Come on.
	She's shooting at people.
	Okay, so I have a segment.
	All right.
	I have several, but I was just...
	This is a one-shot.
	It's kind of a quiz.
	This is the new segment.
	Anchorman, drunk or not drunk?
	You listen, you tell me.
	Okay.
	Well, it's man, so it can't be Diane Sawyer, because that would be drunk.
	But this is Anchorman...
	Drunk or not drunk on the No Agenda Show.
	NASA and Johns Hopkins University released a new color image of our solar system's hottest planet.
	Here's a look at Mercury in color.
	NASA and Johns Hopkins University's Applied Physics Department released this false color image of the planet, but this is not what Mercury would look like to the naked eye.
	Instead, astronomers say it illustrates the many different chemicals and minerals that make up this scorchingly hot planet.
	I'll say not drunk, just dyslexic.
	You think he said a stroma nurse because he's not drunk and John Hopskins?
	Hopskins.
	He's dyslexic.
	He used it twice.
	And then at the end of the guy's report came on, the guy's name's Mark.
	He says, thanks for the report, Marks.
	I like that.
	I think we should have more.
	If TV news was like that all the time, I'd be watching.
	Astronomeners.
	Astronomeners.
	Because then it wouldn't be actually, you know, like, entertaining.
	No, no.
	Instead, you know, this is the kind of news reporting that we get.
	I think everything has come to a standstill here.
	Your batteries are dead.
	No, I don't think it's the...
	Well, maybe it is the battery.
	What is...
	No?
	Well, here we go.
	And new research reveals diet soda may also play a role in the risk for type 2 diabetes.
	It's data from 66,000 women who show that both diet and sugar-sweetened sodas were linked to a higher rate of diabetes, but diet drinkers had the highest chance of developing the condition.
	Experts say these findings don't mean diet drinks cause diabetes, but they may suggest those who are prone to it tend to consume more low-calorie drinks.
	Studies published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition.
	I love that story.
	What, really?
	Aspartame is not good for you?
	Is that the essence of the story?
	And people are like, wow, man, I had no idea.
	Diet drinks are not good for you.
	Who knew?
	So you sent me a link, which I think one of our human resources sent in, about this letter that veterans are receiving now.
	Oh, I didn't send you.
	I don't have a link.
	Yeah, I did.
	Right.
	Yeah, the veterans are getting, they're determining that most veterans coming back from Afghanistan or anywhere, I suppose.
	Iraq or whatever.
	They shouldn't be allowed to buy guns.
	So here's the notice that it's unclear how many, but it could be thousands or tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands of veterans are receiving.
	So here's a copy of one, Department of Veteran Affairs.
	So it's personally addressed.
	We've received information showing that because of your disabilities, you may need help in handling your Department of Veteran Affairs benefits.
	This letter explains the evidence we received, what you must do with this information, the impact on you and your VA payments if we decide that you cannot handle your benefits, and when the Veteran Affairs will make a final decision.
	So, first of all, what information did we receive?
	We received a report from the Portland VA Medical Center on December 3, 2012.
	This evidence indicates that you are not able to handle your VA benefit payments because of a physical or mental condition.
	I mean, this whole letter is so disturbing.
	It's a form letter, obviously, and you're getting it because someone ratted on you, and it's either physical or mental.
	It's not even specified.
	You can file a complaint within 60 days, but you have to get your information within 30 days, and you have to bring your own witness, and they won't pay for anything.
	But then all of a sudden, it says, let me see, where is it?
	Under, what happens if you are rated incompetent?
	So that could be mental or physical.
	If VA decides that you are incompetent to handle your benefit payments, VA may appoint a fiduciary to manage your payments.
	All your payments will be made directly to your fiduciary.
	This person or institution must use your VA payments for your personal care as responsible to VA for how the payments are used.
	And then a determination of incompetency will prohibit you.
	From purchasing, possessing, receiving, or transporting a firearm or ammunition, if you knowingly violate any of these prohibitions, you may be fined, imprisoned, or both pursuant to the Brady Handgun Violence Prevention Act.
	So, basically, this is a form letter that is disarming veterans regardless whether your condition is mental or physical.
	And you're not allowed to look at it.
	I don't think you can even watch CIS on TV. Well, apparently, even if you go into the VA and say, you know, I'm pretty depressed, or if you have post-traumatic stress...
	Well, that's not what it says.
	It's just saying this is how the letter gets generated, according to the news reports.
	So you just don't get this letter unless you've showed up somewhere and said, you know, I felt pretty bad last week, and I couldn't get a job.
	Oh, crap!
	Send him the letter!
	Yeah, but the letter says mental or physical.
	Yeah, mental.
	Or physical.
	Yeah.
	So maybe you show...
	You got a limp.
	Maybe you had your...
	Okay, so my back hurts.
	Your back hurts.
	Yeah, anything.
	So anything.
	Then he gets the letter, right.
	Yeah.
	Because why would you send everyone the letter?
	Why take a chance?
	You don't want crazy people having guns, do you?
	You don't want...
	You're the part of this operation.
	You go, hey, how come you didn't send them the letter?
	The guy shot up a school.
	Mm-hmm.
	So no...
	Everyone gets a letter.
	You do anything, you say, boo, letter.
	Letter.
	Yeah.
	I know.
	They would love to disarm the entire U.S. public this way, by the way.
	Well, they're on their way.
	They haven't figured it out yet.
	They're on their way.
	On their way.
	A little recap.
	We talked about the...
	Actually, we got kudos for talking about our Adam Lanza, Anders Breivik, I don't think you're a gamer, are you, John?
	You're not a gamer, are you?
	I used to play Doom.
	Doom, right.
	On DOS.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I played Doom on DOS. Yeah, same thing.
	And we had a server at the office.
	I remember that.
	I watch the kids play now.
	I mean, Jay's a big fan of the French game Assassin's Creed.
	Oh, Assassin's Creed.
	And Jay Z pretty much keeps up with all the important games.
	So, should we be doing this?
	Should we be...
	Are we missing out?
	Is there something...
	Are we not doing...
	How much time do you have on your hands?
	You're complaining to me about getting clips of the Vortex guys.
	Well, I think you've got time to do some gaming.
	Why don't you do a little gaming and a little less Vortex clips?
	Or get a clip from the game.
	Because if we had been gaming, we would have known the following.
	Here's Andrew Richter says, I'm a bit late on this one, but I want to drop a note about reloading and video games.
	The comment in that clip is accurate.
	Popular shooter games have been dumbed down to an extreme.
	The ammo is no longer kept in magazines.
	You have what is essentially a big bag of bullets that magically appear in magazine form when your character goes through the reload animation.
	For example, instead of 10 or 30 round magazines, you now just have 300 bullets.
	So you may have 30 in the mag and 270 bullets in the bag.
	If you fire five and reload, your character removes the magazine, pops in a new one, and you'll have 30 in the mag, 265 in the bag.
	So I think that actually says that the comment is still incorrect.
	Because if this is what Lanza was thinking and he was reloading before his magazine was empty...
	Then this is not the culture of a mass murderer who's a gamer.
	Exactly, but the other thing is, you've got to weigh yourself down with a whole slew of magazines, and you take two or three shots, pull one out, throw it away, and put a new one in?
	It doesn't make any sense.
	I've got another note.
	Remember, this guy is supposed to have some sensory issues that kids couldn't touch him at school.
	Well, how does that work when you're shooting a gun?
	How does that work?
	So all of a sudden your sensory problems are gone?
	It's not like guns are loud?
	I mean, this is not a problem for him?
	Anyway, we had a previous clip even before that with Aaron Burnett talking about Grand Theft Auto teaching you how to kill hookers.
	Remember that clip?
	Yeah.
	So I got some really good feedback from Adam in Pittsburgh.
	He says, first of all, The woman who made the comment about getting points for killing hookers in Grand Theft Auto needs a little bit of explanation.
	You don't get points for killing hookers.
	You actually have to spend your hard-earned money gleaned from running drugs and executing hits on people to get a handjob, blowjob, or the full service from the hooker.
	Then...
	Since you need to take the hooker to a dark alley to bang her so the cops don't see you, a smart gamer will always get out of the car after the hooker gets out, and using a knife or a baseball bat will kill the hooker so you can get your money back, and as a bonus, any other money she might have gotten from tricks that she turned that night.
	So it's not true that you...
	Oh.
	Yeah.
	I thought...
	I was on...
	Yeah.
	It sounds right.
	This sounds right.
	This sounds right.
	And that sounds like...
	It's right!
	You don't just kill the hooker.
	Or Burnett gets her.
	These new writers.
	I'm sure she doesn't even know what Grand Theft Auto is.
	Another gig we're not going to get.
	And here is, so tonight we have the big celebration, the big Illuminati Fest of the entertainment industrial complex.
	Oh, yeah.
	And again, tonight we'll have two movies on deck.
	We have, of course, the historical...
	Historically accurate, Lincoln, where Lincoln's all about the 13th Amendment, he freed the slaves and stopped the war, and everything was beautiful, and that's all he did.
	He wasn't gay or depressed or any of the things that we actually have read in the historical record.
	No, no, no.
	Fantastic.
	Steven Spielberg sending this DVD to middle schools all across the country so they can learn the truth about the Civil War and about Lincoln.
	And then, of course, more modern, we have Ben Affleck, his directorial celebratory piece of work.
	Argo, another fantastically accurate piece, although not exactly according to former President Jimmy Carter.
	The only thing I would say was that 90% of the contributions to the ideas and the consummation of the plan was Canadian.
	And the movie gives almost full credit to the American CIA. And with that exception, the movie's very good.
	But Ben Affleck's character in the film was only in Tehran a day and a half.
	And the main hero, in my opinion, was Ken Taylor, who was a Canadian ambassador who orchestrated the entire process.
	Yeah.
	So I saw the movie.
	So he screwed the Canadians again.
	Yeah, again.
	Screw you, Canucks.
	I mean, but not just a little bit.
	I mean, Ken Taylor, never was this his idea.
	It was John Goodman.
	You know, all these brilliant guys.
	And Ben Affleck.
	And they were making fake Hollywood movies.
	And they were genius.
	But it turns out it was the ambassador.
	Who, by the way, of course, was the hero.
	Because he hid all these people in his house.
	I remember when that happened.
	And I was...
	And it was annoying because nobody would help us except for the Canadians.
	And then the Canadians actually risked a lot to get the Americans out and kind of save them.
	It was well known.
	It was actually reported that way in the media.
	But over time, screw the Canadians.
	Let's just take all the credit ourselves.
	That's our boys in the CIA. That's right.
	Well, yes, exactly.
	And, of course, Ben Affleck, you know, he's one of those guys that doesn't he have a piece of the African action somewhere?
	One of those...
	Oh, Congo?
	I think he's Congo.
	Yeah, he could be Congo.
	So he actually works, probably, for the CIA. No, he works State Department.
	No, State Department.
	The Academy snubbed him.
	They wouldn't give him director or your credit at all.
	Oh, how much we know.
	Interesting.
	Yeah, you know more than I expected.
	And I think that's probably the reason, because there are Canadians, and lots of them, as a matter of fact, in the Academy.
	Really?
	They all noticed this.
	This is bullcrap!
	Well, you know that...
	Foreign actors, it's a real problem for actors who are on an O-1 or any other type of work visa.
	Because there's so much extra paperwork and hassle with a foreign actor.
	So when they're filming in Vancouver, this becomes a problem?
	No.
	No.
	Obviously not.
	But when you hire them in the United States, you have to go through all kinds of legal hassles.
	So essentially, when Miss Mickey was doing auditions in Los Angeles, all the time it would be like, yeah, no, that's great.
	But, you know, it's like so much hassle.
	We had to bring in lawyers to hire you.
	And like, well, why bother?
	We got J-Lo.
	Yeah.
	Well, it's paperwork.
	This whole country is inundated with paperwork.
	Yeah, we're like Russia.
	the Probably more like Italy in the golden era of bureaucracies.
	But yeah, no, that's what everyone complains about.
	Somebody did a report on how many regulations are being written up a month and it's in the thousands, or maybe it's on a daily basis.
	It's just like ridiculous and nobody knows what these are and you're always in violation.
	It's like the Soviet Union.
	You're right, Russia.
	Because you're always in violation even though you don't know it.
	I mean, the whole key to success in Russia during the Soviet era was that whatever you did, you could have been thrown in jail because you were breaking some law, whether you knew it or not.
	In fact, even when I visited the Soviet Union, when it was still the Soviet Union, and to even get into the country, you had to break the law because at the airport, they have these carts.
	That were outside.
	They were actually, you had to get the cart to move your luggage.
	When was this?
	What year was this?
	Because I've also been to the Soviet Union before David Hasselhoff brought down the wall.
	Yeah, it was about a year before the wall collapsed.
	What year were you there?
	No, not the wall.
	It was a year before the Soviet Union collapsed.
	It's like 89?
	So I was there in 88.
	Okay.
	Well, anyway, to get these carts, you had to use a ruble.
	All right.
	Which means you had to have a ruble, which you couldn't take out of the country, which means you were coming back into the country with a ruble, which means you were violating the law.
	You violate, yeah, exactly.
	Right.
	So to get into, you had to violate the law.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, it was like, it's just the whole thing was set up.
	It was rigged.
	So you were always in violation of the law, and I've always thought that was kind of a genius idea.
	So every citizen could be arrested at the drop of a hat, and you could just dig around, figure something out, and you know he violated some law, and that's pretty much what we've got now.
	I remember when we left on the Moscow Music Peace Festival, and we were told specifically, do not take any Russian currency with you if they, for some reason, decide to frisk you.
	Or search you at the airport and they find you with the rubles, they can throw you in jail.
	So, of course, we all took rubles.
	I mean, obviously.
	Hey!
	Here's an idea for after the show today, John.
	Wolfenstein 3D. Wolfenstein 3D? Yeah, don't you remember?
	Yeah.
	That was right after kind of Doom?
	Right.
	Castle Wolfenstein.
	Castle Wolfenstein.
	From the makers of Doom.
	This is our level of gaming.
	Yeah.
	Can't wait.
	The game is for the younger generation that can play them games.
	They've got time on their hands.
	So, of course, with the big...
	The big sequestration and all this, which by the way, I'm pretty sure that the President and the Congress could at any time just say, you know what, we're not going to do this stupid thing.
	Am I nuts?
	I mean, have we just been trained into this, oh, Armageddon's happening in five more days?
	They can all just get together, have a meeting and go, okay, we're not going to do this, right?
	Yep.
	They could do that any time, right?
	Yep.
	So the entire process, including the president, they're all terrorized.
	They are terrorists.
	They are adherents to Al-Qaeda.
	They are terrorizing the American public.
	Yeah, they should be droned.
	Right.
	So Pete Pistole there of the TSA is talking to Brolf.
	Did you see this video of the three-year-old girl in the wheelchair?
	No.
	Oh!
	You haven't said...
	Oh, this is...
	You must...
	You've got to just...
	You can use the Googles, but...
	So this girl has spina bifida, which is a horrible disease, and she's going to Disneyland, and she's in her wheelchair, and of course, you know, she comes to the airport, the TSA, and is like, you've got to get out of the wheelchair, we're going to pat you down!
	Little slavelet!
	Here, give me that stuffed doll, I'm putting it through the scanner!
	Yeah!
	This is terrible.
	A little girl.
	Yes.
	Three years old.
	In St.
	Louis International.
	Lambert.
	And the kid's crying.
	And then the mom is videotaping this on her iPhone.
	TSA, you're illegal to videotape us, slave!
	Which is not.
	That's a lie.
	And, uh, so of course, you know, then, uh, Blogger Bob of the TSA, you know, everyone's like backpedaling.
	These guys are, I'm sorry, I mean, this whole, the sequestration is great.
	I hope the, I hope no one can fly.
	I hope the whole TSA is put on furlough, which is the perfect term, by the way.
	Furlough, it's far, furlough used to be used for prisoners, okay?
	So you people, you TSA people, you are prisoners of the state.
	You're evil.
	You're trained to be evil.
	I'm so sorry for you.
	I feel really, really bad for you.
	This fucking jobs program that you're put on.
	We all should just face it.
	The nation's broken.
	Now we're all servicing each other with stupid jobs and you're just terrorizing children.
	And here's your boss.
	Apologizing for you, slave.
	Your reaction to this widely publicized incident this week.
	A little three-year-old girl in a wheelchair with spina bifida.
	She was stopped with her mother going through security.
	And it's been seen widely on YouTube.
	I think there have been hundreds of thousands of hits over there.
	You see this little girl crying.
	You've looked into this, I'm sure.
	What happened?
	Because it causes so much bad publicity for TSA administrators and officials.
	Oh, well, bro, let me tell you.
	We love terrorizing little kids.
	Spine a biffin in my ass.
	Cry, slave!
	Well, let me start by saying that as a father of two daughters, I empathize with this family and regret and am sorry for the inaccurate information that we provided to that family as they went through the airport security.
	So, given that we have actually made a number of changes...
	Oh, a number of changes!
	...particularly over the last year, year and a half, Do you hear how he does this?
	He's good, by the way.
	We've made a number of changes over the past year, year and a half, which actually includes people over 75, I think, and under 12 don't have to go through this ordeal, but they're still doing it.
	This is the entire point of the inconsistency of this system.
	We should move away from that one-size-fits-all security and actually change the policies for children 12 and under and the elderly 75 and older.
	So situations like this would not occur.
	And so in this instance, after several minutes of having a supervisor come in and what we call the passenger support specialist...
	There you go.
	That's what I wanted to hear.
	So next time you opt out...
	I think we all should ask for our passenger support specialist.
	Do you think there's one at every TSA station, John?
	Or every airport?
	Well, it could be none.
	It could be bullcrap.
	Because I tried to find out what this is, and I was not...
	P.S.S. P.S.S. P.S.S. Hold on, let's see.
	Passenger Support Specialist.
	What is this?
	Passenger Support Specialist.
	Um...
	You see, I really couldn't find this.
	I think it's full of crap.
	I mean, there's no...
	It's just a lie.
	There's nothing on the TSA blog about this.
	They have a passenger advocate.
	Okay, it's like the ombudsman.
	It's different.
	Well, they're calling it the passenger support specialist in every...
	Lucy was not given a pat down, went through the alternate screening that we had set up for situations like this, and then they were able to go on their vacation and then return in a timely manner.
	So what bothers me about this is that Wolf Blitzer It's just not critical.
	It's like, oh, okay, good job.
	Yeah, great.
	I totally buy your explanation there.
	You didn't terrorize the child.
	It's not a fact that every single TSA employee understands the rules differently.
	There are even different rules.
	There are some airports where they say you can't film, even though you can.
	They have signs.
	You know, then they have this, if you were born before 1928, keep your jacket on.
	Oh, thanks.
	I guess the question is, you know, why every few weeks we see an incident like this?
	I know it must be very frustrating to you as well.
	I mean, is that a journalist?
	Wow, he's supporting them.
	Yes.
	He's like, well, we know there's been a robbery every couple weeks, and I hope it's not too inconvenient.
	Yeah, so since we've changed the policy, again, for the children 12 and under and also the 75 and older, we've, at least anecdotally, I've heard fewer and fewer complaints.
	You know, we do screen, as folks know, a number of people, between 1.7 and 1.1 million people every day.
	Is that an unbelievable number or what?
	1.7 million slaves touched and groped and scanned and beamed every day.
	Nearly 450 airports.
	We strive obviously to provide the most effective security, but also to do that in the most professional way.
	And usually we hit the mark in that, but sometimes we don't.
	And when we make mistakes, we apologize.
	The federal security director at St.
	Louis spoke with the father, apologized.
	If we can refocus our efforts in that regard, then that's exactly what we do.
	Now, what can we do?
	Can we turn this into a promotion?
	Yeah, I think we can.
	As somebody who travels a lot around the world, I'm talking about me.
	Well, because, you know, I visit the Pope, I visit presidents, queens, kings.
	I travel around the world.
	I am Brolf Witzler.
	You know, I've noticed that whenever I travel in the United States, I obviously have to take off my shoes when you go through the TSA lines.
	But when you go to London or Amsterdam or Paris or Rome, you go through Europe, you don't have to take off your shoes.
	Why the discrepancy?
	What do you think the answer is going to be?
	We need to do something about that.
	Well, because obviously the shoe bomber, who came out of the Paris operation, who probably didn't take off his shoes there, is now going to be leaving from the United States.
	Yeah, he won't leave from anywhere else.
	This is so true.
	You fly from Amsterdam, which is where the underwear bomber originated from.
	You can keep your shoes on.
	You can go through the magnetometer.
	Try to blow up the plane.
	We're successful.
	We don't want you blowing up the plane leaving the country.
	Different insurance policy.
	Ah, gotcha.
	Well, of course, it all dates back to December of 2001 with Richard Reed, the shoe bomber.
	There you go.
	So it's a policy decision here in the U.S., but as we expect...
	Policy decision.
	Oh, it's not really about security.
	It's a policy decision.
	Thank you for clearing that up.
	And the known and trusted traveler population.
	We actually expect approximately 45 to 50 million people this year to be able to keep their shoes on as they go through security screening.
	Oh, how?
	We're working with the European Union to have consistency and harmonization in many regards.
	We're also working with technology manufacturers to ensure the best possible detection capabilities for shoes.
	Shoe detection technology.
	Shoe detection technology.
	Oh, cool.
	That are ongoing.
	But here it is.
	Try to facilitate that.
	But the best way people can have the highest assurance and be able to keep their shoes on is to sign up for a trusted traveler program such as the Customs Border Protection Program.
	You submit an application online.
	You go in for an interview.
	It's $100 for five years.
	So $20 a year, it's one of those...
	Good bargains that the U.S. government still offers.
	And so it's something that we encourage anybody who flies with any frequency, whether just domestically or clearly internationally, to sign up for Customs Board of Protection's Global Entry Program.
	That is a great deal.
	That's a great deal.
	The terrorization, total terrorist actions against a three-year-old child in a wheelchair, and we've turned it into a promotion for the TSA's pre-check global entry program.
	It's just amazing to me.
	Amazing.
	Good work, yeah.
	Brolf.
	What have you learned, Brolf?
	Nothing.
	What is this Gilmore gang clip you've got here?
	Oh, that's for you later.
	Okay.
	Unless you want to bore the audience.
	No, I don't want to.
	It's funny because I happened to watch an episode yesterday.
	It's probably the same one.
	So just play this, because there's a little meme in here that I think is great.
	This is apparently over the 60 minutes over the weekend, they had some guy, and they were just jumping all over him because he thinks that this whole panda thing, because the Chinese have eliminated where the pandas could actually live in the wild, and he believes that all the tens and hundreds of millions of dollars spent on saving the panda is just creating a zoo animal.
	That's all we're ever going to see of this thing, because it's not...
	But he has a little thing at the end, a little punchline, that kind of, I think, is almost like a show title worthy.
	With up to 200 species going extinct every day, he says it makes no sense to spend so much money trying to save just one.
	I don't want the panda to be extinct.
	I don't want anything to be extinct on my watch.
	But ultimately, let's not waste vast amounts of money trying to prevent it when we could use that money far more efficiently, far more optimally somewhere else.
	What about the argument that if you take the panda out of the equation, if the panda's not the symbol on the masthead, nobody gives money?
	I think that if they took the panda off the letterhead, other animals would fill that void pretty quickly, and very sadly, they could replace that with a tiger cub, and people would give generously.
	One thing people might say is, who are you to play God?
	Who are you to decide that we shouldn't save the panda?
	Who are they to play God?
	They pick the cute, cuddly one.
	Why don't they pick a snail?
	Or a caterpillar?
	Or a fly?
	They're already playing God.
	They're playing Survival of the Cutest in my books.
	How about a slug?
	Survival of the Cutest.
	I love that.
	That's very good because that is every reality show on television right there.
	Survival of the Cutest.
	Yeah.
	That makes total sense.
	Well, you know, the WWF was started by Prince Bernard of the Netherlands, is seen as a front group for the New World Order.
	Interesting that a Chinese symbol is essentially used as their symbol.
	He's also the founder of the Bilderberg Group.
	Interesting coincidence here because the WWE or the WWF used to be the World Wrestling Federation and they created a subcult within the organization called New World Order.
	Seriously.
	And when they did this, they got sued by WWF to change their WWF to WWE and they won.
	Yeah, because they're like, hey, we got the lock on this New World Order thing, man.
	What do you think we're doing here?
	All right?
	You know, we created this whole front.
	Now you're going to take that?
	I don't think so.
	That makes sense.
	I like that.
	That's a good one.
	So the final thing that really, really just got my goat, and I'm sure you heard about this, So how long have I been following Haiti?
	Since the day after the earthquake, well, the day the earthquake happened.
	We've been following the money.
	I need to reiterate one more time that we had huge benefits, Clooney, Clinton.
	We had Bush and Clinton.
	On all television stations.
	We just need cash.
	I know a lot of people want to send blankets or water.
	Just send your cash.
	Billions of dollars collected worldwide.
	Billions of dollars collected.
	Only several hundred million got through.
	The Navy took money for having their aircraft carrier.
	All these NGOs just keeping white people employed.
	All this bull crap.
	Just everyone taking money.
	Everyone on the take.
	They tried to put in a musician.
	As the president, he got cocky.
	They took his bandmate, put him in.
	The Clintons got a hotel, they're opening up the Iron Market.
	They're literally living it up in hotels in Haiti, and still hundreds of thousands of people are eating mud cakes in tents.
	Not a dime being spent on these people.
	And then the UN comes in, and the Nepal blue helmets brought in cholera.
	Cholera.
	And so hundreds of thousands of people got cholera.
	I think it was like 215,000 Haitians were treated for cholera.
	About 8,000 or 9,000 died because they pooped their guts out.
	Thanks.
	Hey, thanks, UN. And now...
	The UN is saying, well, that's all fine and dandy, but you can't actually put the blame on us.
	We're not assuming any responsibility.
	Screw you.
	Screw you, you pooping Haitians.
	They do deny it, but not plausibly.
	They appointed a panel of four experts.
	Those experts presented pretty substantial evidence that the UN was responsible.
	The UN still refused to take responsibility, but since then, two of their experts have said that they now think the UN is responsible.
	UN Special Representative to Haiti, Bill Clinton, said that the UN was the, quote, the proximate cause of the cholera in Haiti.
	But really what the UN is doing is saying, you can't sue us.
	We will not give you your day in court, so we don't really need to defend ourselves on the merits.
	The UN is, by its mission, trying to establish the rule of law.
	And certainly no one in Haiti will take the UN's sermons on the rule of law credibly when the UN itself is refusing to obey the law.
	And it's not just in Haiti.
	This is something that is a challenge for the UN throughout the world.
	I first got to Haiti as a UN human rights officer, and I know that one of the things we try to do is to convince people to put their personal interests aside and to let the law work things out.
	And the UN's Blatant failure to do that in this situation is subversive of all the UN's work throughout the world.
	All right.
	Screw you, Haiti.
	Ha, ha, ha.
	Ha, ha, ha.
	Poop on.
	That's amazing.
	And so the big conversation.
	I heard our national treasure, NPR. For some reason, I keep catching this.
	It's called The Barber Shop.
	Have you ever heard this show?
	No, I've never heard of this show ever.
	Oh.
	So they get like a whole bunch of douchebags on Skype or some crappy phone connection and they talk about topics.
	It's this whole idea of the five or the what.
	It's like everyone's trying to do it now, analysis.
	But the problem with all these experts and pundits is they all have something to promote.
	And that's why it's not interesting, because they're always promoting their agenda, which is why we're so awesome, because we have no agenda.
	We've got nothing.
	We've got nothing to promote.
	We've got nothing.
	We are like the Haitians, except we're not quite pooping out cholera.
	Yeah, it could happen.
	Yeah, but it could happen at any moment.
	And they just talk and talk, like, well, the UN won't go and help anybody if they can get sued, and they, you know, ugh.
	Oh, they're apologists.
	Yeah, but just get rid of the whole UN thing then.
	Act like the UN all of a sudden is its own super-duper great NGO entity, which of course it is, but whatever happened to the idea that it was the United Nations and hands across America and we are the world and we're going to go help people?
	No.
	It's like these Nepalese guys, they got paid four times their normal salary.
	The Nepalese military who put on the blue helmets.
	They didn't care.
	This is a bonanza when this happens.
	And you know where that money came from?
	From your $10 that you texted, you stupid slave.
	Well, we called it right away and followed the pattern in a disgusting way.
	And George Clooney, you should be ashamed of yourself, George Clooney.
	Ashamed.
	Just ashamed.
	We talked about Clooney's look of guilt when that one guy called him out on one of those things.
	Yeah, he was like, oh no, man, don't highlight me, brother.
	They forced me.
	Yeah, I'm sure they did, actually.
	Of course they made him do it.
	Meanwhile, the coincidence could not be any greater.
	In the Washington...
	What's the big newspaper?
	Is it the Post?
	Yeah, the Washington Post.
	I have here Friday, February 22nd.
	I have a scan of it.
	It's in the show notes.
	Hold on.
	I'm going to...
	Here we go.
	Uh...
	Notice of dissolution of the Clinton Bush Haiti Fund to the creditors of and the claimants against the Clinton Bush Haiti Fund.
	Notice is hereby given by the Clinton-Bush-Haiti Fund, in parentheses, the company, which was dissolved by the filing of a certificate of dissolution in the office of the Department of the State of Delaware on December 31, 2012, that all creditors of and claimants against the company 2012, that all creditors of and claimants against the company are hereby required to present in writing and in detail their claims, respective accounts, and demands against said company at 1501 K Street NW, blah, blah, blah.
	On or before the 22nd day of April 2013.
	Or such claims, accounts, and demands shall be forever barred as against the property of the company and its directors dated this 15th day of February 2013.
	So they're just cleaning up the evidence.
	Nice.
	Right?
	Oh, yeah.
	Great catch.
	That's the catch of the day.
	Yeah.
	Well, that's our producers.
	I mean, obviously, I don't read the Washington Post.
	But that's how we roll.
	Somebody caught it.
	I've got the scan right here.
	Whatever that was, you're great.
	Isn't that awesome?
	Yeah, it's a beauty.
	Are we surprised?
	No.
	We're stunned by this.
	These guys.
	These guys.
	We just need cash.
	I know a lot of people want to send blankets or water.
	Just send your cash.
	So if you've got any...
	You know, we should send a note.
	Hi, on behalf of the cholera-pooping people of Haiti, we'd like our $2 billion, please.
	And we just take them to court.
	Somebody should take them to court.
	Ah, please.
	It was a scam.
	One of the few countries, I will say, one of the few countries in the world that ever stood up and bought themselves out of slavery, they told the French, get the hell out.
	Right?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	And then the French said, well, you'll owe us.
	I said, okay, we'll take that, whatever.
	And now look where they are, right back where they started.
	Yes, because they didn't play the game properly.
	Right.
	And they should hire the Curry Dvorak Consulting Group in future.
	I don't think we can do anything for them.
	Do we need to talk about this horse meat thing, which now seems to be every country in the world is discovering they're eating horse meat?
	No.
	Okay.
	Because, you know, they've discovered in America that...
	When I first brought it up, you nixed the whole idea that we should discuss it in the first place.
	Well, that was in the UK. Now it's Italy.
	Now it's everywhere.
	Now everyone's testing...
	I spot it as a trend.
	The real thing that I think is going to pop is that people are going to discover that they're not eating the fish that's being advertised.
	Oh, that's been going on forever.
	You know, people buying Red Snapper, which is actually tilapia.
	Yeah.
	Which is like the biggest Gitmo fish in the world.
	Yeah, tilapia.
	And the salmon, where they just throw food.
	Tilapia is the canola oil of fish.
	I don't think it even deserves that.
	Tilapia.
	They feed fish to make fish.
	Yeah, well, it seems to be kind of a double whammy.
	Yeah.
	But, you know, you think you're getting tuna in your favorite sushi restaurant.
	Think again.
	Well, it's like the grass-fed beef scam.
	Oh, tell me about that.
	Well, grass-fed beef, generally speaking, is the beef before it's sent to the, you know, all beef right away usually is brought up grass-fed.
	So you get the thing a certain age, and then you take the beef, and then you send them to a finishing house.
	Which is a place where they fatten them up with a bunch of grain and all this other stuff.
	So they have the grass-fed beef and it's a wholesale item.
	And then it goes to the finishing house where they put a lot of money and effort into getting the thing bigger.
	And then they sell that at some other price.
	Well, grass-fed beef should be cheaper.
	It should not be more expensive.
	Right, because it's not fattened up.
	Yeah, because they didn't fatten it up and spend a lot of money on the animal.
	So what you're saying is the pricing is a scam.
	Right, it's a scam.
	Yeah, the pricing is a scam, sure.
	Right, totally.
	Now if you go and, like we do, we get our grass-fed beef directly from the grower, we're paying like two bucks a pound for it.
	You see this stuff in the store, it's like 18, 20 bucks a pound, 25 bucks grass-fed.
	It's a total scam.
	It's unbelievable.
	Everyone just laps it up, they lap it up, lap, lap, lap.
	Yeah, because they think it's great for them.
	Well, it is better meat, actually.
	Generally speaking, it's got less fat.
	It's got all these...
	It's beneficial, but it's not...
	It should be cheaper.
	Yeah.
	Well, I just wish that...
	I buy my meat directly from the meat guy who processes...
	Well, he takes it to be processed, but he grows...
	Everything is his until the animal is killed and sliced up to bits.
	But I wish I could find fish around here, but we really don't have that.
	You have to go down to the coast.
	You're in the middle of...
	I know.
	I know.
	It's a problem.
	You're not in fish country.
	It's a problem.
	It's a problem.
	Why?
	Do you crave fish?
	Yeah.
	Fish is very important.
	And, of course, the fish that we're getting is from the Gulf, which is...
	You got to wonder.
	You don't have to use any oil in your pan.
	You got to wonder.
	All right, big man, play us out.
	What do you got?
	None.
	You got something here, don't you?
	You got nothing?
	Okay, you want to hear your favorite guy?
	My favorite?
	Richard Clark on Hacker and State Government 1.
	He's off to a new gig.
	He's at the Governor's Conference trying to sell his consulting services because, you know, Richard Clark, the ex-CIA guy, is nothing more than a genius when it comes to computer technology.
	Mr.
	Clark, what do you believe is the most significant cybersecurity threat facing states?
	Governor, I think I would distinguish between the most significant threat and the most likely.
	So the most significant threat would be an attack by either a state government like China or Iran or a non-state actor like Hezbollah that took down the power grid or caused pipelines to blow up or caused trains to derail.
	I think the emergency response That you do for those sorts of things is similar to hurricanes, but there are some distinct differences.
	And I think knowing what you would do and exercising it is very important.
	Knowing what authorities you have in those situations and knowing who the right people are and who to call them and what they will do.
	That's the most significant threat.
	The most likely threat is happening every day, and that is people are hacking into your networks and writing themselves checks.
	Oh.
	Oh, my God.
	He does it at the last moment of the show.
	It's unbelievable.
	Wow, I didn't think we'd have one at all.
	Oh, my God.
	That's an evergreen right there.
	The guy's full of crap, but trains are going to be around this.
	Pipelines are blowing up.
	I believe he went to the Y2K playbook.
	We've all forgotten about Y2K. No, no, we talked about it just the other day.
	No, I'm right on.
	But I think the playbook is wide open for exploitation.
	And so we're going to have trains derailed by Hezbollah using computers.
	John, we have a hacker!
	Oh my God, we're blowing up!
	Come on!
	John, what's going on?
	Oh no!
	No!
	Yeah.
	My goodness.
	And writing checks as we speak.
	Yeah, they're writing checks.
	That's the worst thing.
	They're in my bank account writing a check.
	Hey, come to my house on Monday so we can do the bills together and you can write some checks.
	If only!
	I mean, I can't even transfer money from one bank to the other electronically in this country.
	Are you kidding me?
	They're writing checks.
	You know, so this is...
	Okay.
	So we work for a living.
	We have taken a...
	We enjoy being productive people.
	I think we're contributing to society in some small, insignificant, pinhead way.
	But when we are both good, dead, and gone, I think there's enough work out there that someone, for a while, will say, I hear those guys.
	Jay Leno.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Maybe we'll get a plaque somewhere.
	Oh, a plaque would be good.
	Insignificant spot, you know.
	And they'll say, oh, yeah.
	You know, like the guy.
	There will be somewhere in the future someone will say, hey, like that guy in Gutenberg.
	You know, oh, these guys were talking about that in 1890.
	And some kids in the future will be like, oh, wow.
	You remember, you know, the slavery thing that we're all susceptible to?
	There were two guys, you know, back in the Internet days.
	Remember those?
	Ha, ha, ha.
	When people were hacking into your accounts and writing checks, they were actually working trying to give people information.
	It's too bad too little people listen to them.
	So we choose that path.
	And then you get a guy like Richard Clark who just kicks back and just lies and talks whatever crap and makes millions of dollars selling this BS. Just the consultancy alone.
	I should have listened.
	We should have gone into public office.
	We should have.
	We blew it.
	That's the bonanza.
	See, we thought that back in the day you were a civil servant and you served and that was really a heroic thing to do and that was fantastic and it was really great if you wanted to serve your country.
	And I'll be honest, I'm like, screw that!
	I want to make money.
	I want to be rich and famous and awesome.
	And now it turns out, joke's on us.
	Because if you're the civil servant, then you turn right around and you sell your consultancy to the entire industrial complex, and that's how you actually become rich.
	Stupid.
	Stupid.
	So let this be a lesson.
	Well, you know, they keep this a secret.
	You have to be in the business.
	The cat's out of the bag.
	If you were in the business, you would have known.
	Yeah, well, we blew it.
	We blew it.
	So instead, we live a life of mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Oh yeah, I'm going to play us out with that.
	And I'm hoping, I'm hoping, I'm really hoping.
	Cheap cheddar.
	I'm really hoping that we could, this is one project we can do, John.
	I'm thinking, maybe, well, it's containers.
	How about a franchise of mac and cheese?
	Yeah.
	We need a snappy name.
	Mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese truck.
	Depression food at its finest.
	Something like that.
	Well, we'll work on the slogans.
	Anyway, a pleasure serving you once again, my friends.
	Remember us.
	We need your support.
	It's the only way we stay alive.
	Dvorak.org slash NA. Please help us out for this coming Thursday episode of The Best Podcast in the Universe, coming to you from the Travis Heights Hideout here in Austin, Texas, in South Austin.
	In the morning, I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, where I remain, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We'll be back on Thursday with another episode of No Agenda.
	And stay tuned if you're listening live on the stream to the No Agenda producer update.
	Adios, mofos!
	Adios, mofos!
	Everybody deserves their mac and cheese.
	You slaves can get used to mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Mac and cheese.
	Macaroni and cheese.
	Cheddar melted together.
	Mac and cheese.
	Minimum weight!
	Yeah!

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