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June 9, 2011 - No Agenda

02:21:10

311: Holy e-Coli Batman

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	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Thursday, June 9, 2011.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination, Episode 311.
	This is no agenda.
	Acting as your official beard from the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West, the People's Republic of Southern California.
	In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, where someone's out to get you, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	In the morning to you, John.
	In the morning to you, in the morning, all ships at sea, feet in the air, boots on the ground, and everyone in between.
	Especially those in the chat room who are all jazzed up, geared up, and energized at noagendastream.com, noagendachat.net, exactly the way their government loves them.
	You've got to be charged and ready to go so we can suck the lifeblood out of you.
	Not we, but the government, obviously.
	The someone.
	Yes.
	Ah, well, John, I guess we might as well get it over with right now.
	What?
	Wienergate!
	We tried to talk about it last time.
	You passed it over.
	Why don't we skip it again?
	No, because I got a theory.
	I got a theory.
	Oh.
	Okay.
	Well, so first of all, dude, there's no need to tweet me when there's something like a Wiener press conference.
	No, tweet me.
	Text me.
	I didn't text you about a Wiener press conference.
	Yeah, when he came out and said that he...
	Oh, right, right, right.
	I'm like, really?
	What do you think I'm doing here?
	Twiddling my thumbs all day?
	I thought you were in the RV driving around.
	No, man, we came back Sunday night.
	I thought you were at a drive-in burger place with girls on the roller skates.
	Yeah, wee!
	No, man, I was Jones and I couldn't wait to get back to watch me some C-SPAN Live.
	Of course, the action was on CNN. There was no C-SPAN Live worth of crap this week.
	No, I know.
	So, Occam's Razor wins again, eh?
	What a lying sack of garbage, Mr.
	Anthony Weiner.
	All right, well, I would assume you would think that he, because I think he was set up It was a very interesting, but I haven't gotten quite to the bottom of why.
	I know they want to get rid of him and they're trying to get rid of him as fast as possible.
	They want to get him out of there and he refuses to go knowing the whole thing is about getting rid of him.
	Right.
	Which I kind of hinted at on the last show and there was a clip that I always thought was screwy but now makes a lot more sense.
	Right.
	And if you listen to the Republicans in particular, in fact they have a clip from Rintz, Prebys, or whatever that guy.
	By the way, have you ever seen that guy?
	Yeah.
	How does that guy win anything?
	Well, it's not a...
	Was it an actual election to become the spokeshole for the Republican Party?
	Well, I mean, he's just the most dweebish character.
	He looks like a troll.
	And I don't use that word lightly.
	No, you don't.
	I ever ran across, and he's just hounding and hounding.
	And there was a very interesting thing with him and Greta Van Susteren, who's apparently...
	Greta, even though she works for Fox, I don't think she's ever brought into the meetings...
	No, she seems kind of on the up and up, actually.
	Yeah, and so she's always baffled by when somebody comes up with some lit in this thing.
	I think that's just the way her facial expression is, that mouth-like ball.
	In this case, she was completely baffled.
	She could not figure out why the Republicans didn't want to keep Wiener around as a punching bag.
	Mm-hmm.
	And Priebus had the weakest argument.
	You might play that as a preface to what we're going to discuss.
	It's been all over the news media.
	And so lucky you is a tactical matter.
	Imagine if he left today and he disappeared.
	If he sticks around until the next election, there you have somebody who can point it.
	From a tactical standpoint, I think the last thing the Republican Party should want is that he resign.
	Because it looks bad.
	Let the hearing drag out of the ethics investigation go on.
	It's not going to get any prettier.
	You know, as we look at these emails unfold, they only get ugly.
	Every time we open the newspaper, we read the things he's saying.
	I mean, there's a terrible crack that he makes today about Jewish women, and he's got an awful big Jewish women constituents.
	I mean, it gets worse.
	I would want to stick around if I were you.
	But here's the problem.
	It's bad for our country.
	And I think that people like Nancy Pelosi and Debbie Wasserman Schultz ought to do the right thing and call on his resignation.
	I mean, where have they been?
	Where is Nancy Pelosi on calling for the resignation?
	Where is Debbie Wasserman Schultz?
	See, I'm afraid to say that.
	You know why?
	Because I'm afraid you're going to get your turn.
	I think that they should.
	I worry about both sides of the aisle.
	I think that they should call for his resignation.
	I think the guy has exhibited the utmost outrageous behavior, I think, as a congressman, and the way that he did it.
	I mean, in this three-ring circus that he's created.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	So do you have a theory?
	Sorry, I can hear you.
	Do you have a theory?
	Well, I'm convinced he was set up.
	It's a known fact.
	The newsrooms all feel that everybody, they were on to him doing this some time ago and they just needed to bring some people in to expose it.
	There was an interesting post on my blog about how you can now, people don't realize that, I don't care what password you use, you can crack it within two minutes.
	So you have to assume that all the intelligence agencies in both sides of the aisle, parties and everybody in between, are in everybody's accounts, especially in Congress.
	So they're watching everything these guys do to an extreme.
	They're looking at the back channels of everything.
	So they could have done this to this guy, apparently, anytime they wanted to.
	But there's either a vote coming up, or it's a payback to Schumer, because Schumer is his protege.
	There is definitely something going on, but the key to understanding it, I believe, is the fact that they're trying to rush this guy out.
	I went back to 2007, and after the show on Sunday...
	And I played the clip for you of CNN Wolf Blitzer.
	By the way, it's one thing to lie to your constituents, it's one thing to lie to your family and to your wife, but oh boy, you better not be lying to Wolf Blitzer.
	That is the criminal offense here for Mr.
	Wiener.
	I went back and I listened actually to our show and looked in what we had then of show notes, nothing like we have now.
	And, of course, the clue for me was that Wolf Blitzer had edited out the entire discussion about what his wife, Huma Abedin, does.
	And I was like, well, that's interesting.
	They played like five, six minutes of this interview with Wiener.
	This is before he came out with the truth, quote, truth.
	Why would they cut that whole piece out, which wasn't all that much time-wise, about her work with Hillary Clinton?
	And I went back in 2007, end of 2007, right around the time we started this show, John, and in 2008, we were talking about, on this very program, we were talking about the possible lesbian relationship between Hillary Clinton and Huma Abedin.
	Huma Abedin, known as her body man, is actually what people are calling her.
	And there were a lot of rumors.
	Right, I remember that.
	Okay, a lot of rumors.
	So, right around the time those rumors are starting to peak, all of a sudden she's dating Anthony Weiner, who was just about to, I think he was at that time, he was maybe just a freshman congressman.
	And perfect match, she's Muslima.
	Okay, okay, I know where you're going.
	Okay, well, let me complete it.
	Now, the interesting things, side notes, Huma Abedin, who as an assistant when Hillary Clinton was senator, was making $9,000 a year.
	Now she's probably making an official salary of about $40,000.
	She has a $700,000 condo, which she purchased outright in Washington, D.C. She has Prada bags, Marc Jacobs bags.
	She's got tons of beautiful, expensive stuff.
	And it's not coming from her family who, as far as I can tell, is not loaded or rich.
	She's well accessorized.
	Yes, exactly.
	She's also stunningly beautiful.
	But I see her in pictures with Lucifer Clinton.
	They're wearing the same red outfits.
	And if you believe Jennifer Flowers, on page 42 of her book about Bill Clinton, she quotes Bill Clinton telling her that Hillary Clinton has eaten more you-know-what than he has.
	That's the line in the book.
	So, I believe that Anthony Weiner, who, by the way, their marriage, July 10, 2010, was presided and officiated by Bill Clinton, Yes.
	I believe that he was in on the game.
	He was in there to act as the beard for Huma Abedin and Lucifer Clinton.
	And that's why he had such an incredible big mouth, because he had the power of the Clintons behind him.
	All he had to do was just play along with the game, and he could have been in a great position.
	Now, of course, because he doesn't actually have a relationship with this woman, like most guys, he's freaking out.
	So that's when he gets into the whole Twitter and email thing and the cyber-sexing and all that stuff.
	And when he was up there apologizing, he wasn't crying for his wife, John.
	He was crying for himself that he messed it all up.
	And this is why they want him out, because everyone who's against the power of the Clintons wants to get this guy out.
	That's what's going on here.
	I like it.
	Yeah, and I think it's pretty rock solid.
	You know, the only variable in here, you're going to have to explain this away since I'm giving this one to you.
	Okay, thank you.
	Is or is she not pregnant or is that bull crap?
	I think, you know, and that came out and apparently it was in the New York Times.
	I didn't read it.
	I think that is, first of all, when people are pregnant, they usually don't say anything until a minimum of three months of pregnancy.
	That's just total distraction just to fan the flames a little more.
	I don't think that's true.
	And if anything, it's a plant to make you believe that they had consummated the marriage and again to move away from the Hillary and...
	I have like some kind of...
	Weird crackle.
	If anything, it's meant to move you away from thinking that Lucifer and Huma have some form of lesbian relationship.
	Okay, well, my thing, the only thing, again, I'm observing this rush to get him out of there.
	Well, because anyone who doesn't like the Clintons, and I think there's quite a body count, they want him out because the guy still has the power of the Clintons behind him.
	You see?
	Look, we've observed this guy, and sometimes...
	We have clip after clip, because he does do exactly what you say.
	He goes in front of Congress, what nobody else does, and just rails.
	Rails on him, because he has that power.
	The Clintons are still incredibly powerful.
	Incredibly powerful.
	And sometimes actually, you know, I agree with what he's doing.
	You know, like against Clarence Thomas and stuff.
	That's good stuff.
	But he had such a big mouth and all of a sudden it all clicked for me.
	I'm like, obviously.
	Obviously.
	Now, there is something...
	Wait a minute, let's stop here.
	Okay.
	I'm buying this theory.
	It's tawdry and it's creative.
	She was in Vogue magazine.
	How many staffers get a pictorial in Vogue magazine?
	I can just elusive.
	Honey, I'm going to get you in Vogue.
	Don't you worry.
	I'll take care of you.
	Have another Marc Jacobs bag.
	Why now?
	No, I think he genuinely messed up.
	I don't think he was set up.
	Let's just do Occam's razor.
	I think he just messed up.
	The guy was out of control.
	I mean, you know, John, when the blood flows down to your penis, it's not in your head.
	The guy's not thinking.
	And he's just like, bleh.
	So that's why he was so upset.
	He's crying for himself.
	How could he be such an idiot?
	I had everything going for him.
	I got by into that theory that he's crying for himself.
	I don't think it was a setup.
	Now, there could be a setup scenario.
	This is an interesting one.
	There is a redistricting that has to take place in New York.
	It could be a perfect time to eliminate him from the mix.
	I don't see why they would, because it's always good to have a congressman to have a vote that's going to do whatever you say.
	So I can't see why Lucifer or Billy Boy would actually set up...
	No, I wouldn't think they were setting him up.
	It would have to be the anti-Clinton forces.
	Then it could be redistricting of New York.
	Yeah.
	I looked up the law in New York, you have to have a special election if he resigns or dies or whatever, and it has to be within like 30 or 40 days, but only after the governor calls for it.
	Seems too convoluted.
	I think the guy generally, genuinely...
	Just messed up.
	You think he just stepped in it?
	Yes, he did.
	He had it all going for him.
	He had Chuck Schumer.
	Okay, so your explanation is there was no setup whatsoever.
	He stepped in it, and what unraveled, the only reason that he had this going on in the first place is because this was his outlet, because this marriage was a sham.
	Yes.
	And he's this woman, he's a beard for this girl who's basically living with...
	She's living with Hillary all the time.
	Yeah.
	And as the girlfriend, as the lipstick...
	Total lipstick.
	Lesbian.
	Which, you know, I don't know.
	I'm going to have to go start listening.
	I'm going to send a note to the Gay News.
	Yes.
	Who's a show which is on Free Speech TV and they out people left and right.
	Yeah.
	And they love outing people.
	I think Michael Musto of The Village Voice actually wrote a lot about Hillary Clinton when this was taking place and Huma Abedin.
	And if anyone, he's the one that semi-outed these two.
	And the crazy thing is, what really gets me...
	If Hillary would just come out and say, I'm in love with this woman, and it's a problem because she's a subordinate and she works for me, so she's going to resign her post, but she's my traveling companion.
	I love her, and she loves me, and we make awesome lesbian sex.
	It would be great!
	There would be no problem!
	It would be no problem!
	I'd be like, yay!
	It would be perfect!
	It's not going to happen?
	I mean, how stupid is this?
	At the end of the day, I love the theory, but it's so dumb, because all you have to do is just admit it.
	So that picture in the war room with Hillary and her face, she was actually smelling her girlfriend?
	Oh, John!
	Oh my goodness!
	You are a horrible man!
	I'm sorry!
	That is the worst!
	I mean, I can...
	We had female listeners.
	They're all gone now.
	I really feel bad about that joke.
	Miss Mickey, could you turn the heat off for me, darling?
	Thank you, love.
	You got yourself heated up.
	I'm buying everything except for the fact that now I'm going to counter this.
	I'm not going to do it today, but I'm still convinced there's the Schumer angle.
	But as it now stands, your thesis is absolutely on the top of the list.
	And there's a lot of people catching on to this, and all you have to do is go back, and Google does have this, 2007, 2008.
	And the thing is, even before these articles came out, and I got a note from one of our producers, Southern Bread, and I was like, you know, I remember this name.
	What was going on with this woman?
	And it hit me, and now if you Google it, you've seen it all over the place, and people are bringing back those articles from 2007, 2008.
	I totally think the New York Times, Reporting on her being pregnant is just a plant.
	Like, oh, they've consummated the marriages for real.
	Bull crap.
	Did you see that picture, by the way, of his boner?
	Not the one in the boxers?
	No, I stopped looking for pictures.
	Okay, so you can go to tweetmyboner.com where I'm keeping a record of...
	And if anyone else tweets their boner, it'll be on tweetmyboner.com.
	Did you turn it off, darling?
	Because I'm like, yeah, thanks.
	I'm going nuts here.
	Are you still in the RV? No, no, no, no.
	I'm in the Crackpot Command Center.
	But it was really...
	We're in June gloom here, so I had the...
	I turned on the heat this morning.
	It was like 55 degrees or whatever.
	It's crazy.
	We haven't had a decent day.
	Well, we hadn't.
	I'm sorry.
	We've had a couple decent days, but half a year of really kind of low temperatures, cloudy, not beautiful in Southern California.
	Makes me wonder why I could have stayed in San Francisco.
	Yeah, it was sunny today.
	Yesterday was nice.
	Could have totally enjoyed the same deal.
	Just take the train.
	Let's thank some of our producers.
	I don't think we have many, so we can probably just...
	Yeah, well, you said it was a gloomy day, so we have gloomy input for this show, I'm sorry to say.
	And I am sorry, too, because we did a lot of work to produce...
	Is this a sign of things to come for the Hot Pockets 2008 tour?
	That we're not going to get a lot of support for it?
	We'll see what happens.
	We'll follow this.
	I thought we had a reasonable show.
	Maybe people don't want to see you.
	Maybe it was just a crappy show.
	I thought we did okay.
	Well, I don't know.
	What was remarkable about the show?
	The Hummer.
	The Berkeley Hummer.
	Yeah, and then they noticed that Gawker and some other people finally picked up on that.
	So we're leaders.
	But that was just laughable.
	It wasn't insightful.
	It was just ridiculing somebody for having a speech anomaly.
	You know what, John?
	If we go along with our theory, we suck.
	So we better do good today.
	Well, I think you already topped it with the lesbian thing.
	You can't go wrong.
	I mean, lesbians and the truth.
	I mean, it's like, send your money!
	Lesbians.
	We just need cash.
	I know a lot of people want to send blankets or water.
	Just send your cash.
	So we have one executive producer, two associate executive producers for this show.
	We have...
	Clancy Childs, Sir Clancy as a matter of fact, helping us out from London, England with 20956 from the noragendathon.com.
	He'll send a separate email to us.
	Oh, that's right.
	He did the marathon, right?
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's nice.
	We appreciate the number of runners that run for our show.
	They're running away from us, unfortunately.
	Michael Bowling in Watsonville, California.
	200 bucks is the graduation president from Kevin Bowling to my son Michael Bowling.
	He gets the credit.
	He's graduating with his Master's in Electrical Engineering at the University of California, Santa Barbara.
	It's about time for him to stop being a boner.
	Please de-douche him.
	And karma.
	A couple of shots.
	You've been de-douched.
	You've got karma.
	We save a good half hour on the show with that double.
	He's an associate exec?
	Yeah.
	Okay, good.
	And Maria Rita Ferrara, or Ferrara.
	Oh, from Lisboa.
	From Lisbon, yes, from Portugal.
	Hola!
	And of course, she won't be listening after this show.
	But we want to thank her.
	She's in for $200.
	It's time to support your show again.
	I can't do this as frequently as I wished.
	Because money hasn't been abundant lately, but I finally managed to juggle my budget and put some aside for this week.
	I think good work should be rewarded, but not only that, your theories sound like American version of my father's, and that makes it worthwhile for me.
	Once he isn't around to share his anymore, I don't always agree with these ideas, but they make me think.
	So keep on keeping on.
	Obviously she's been in Berkeley for once in a while.
	Rita.
	In Lisbon, by the way, I would recommend people to take a vacation there.
	The Portuguese have done a wonderful job of fixing up their country with EU cash and not paying them back.
	You better hurry up before the rioting starts.
	But you can still get a nice vacation in before it all goes to hell.
	They're not going to be throwing anything at us.
	No, of course not.
	We're no agenda folk.
	So that'll be it for this week's producers, and we'll have a break in the middle of the show with some thank yous for others.
	And of course, we highly appreciate people who support this program.
	I'm surprised we didn't get a member of the 311 Club.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, and of course, we can still get in on the 333 Club, and the way to do that is to support the show at dvorak.org slash na.
	A couple of PR mentions, some domains that are now forwarding to noagendershow.com, and I'm working on a system that will enable you to do much more with these domain names that you register.
	Stay tuned for that.
	Kind of a preview is podcastlicense.com.
	Are we going to hear from that later?
	Do people sign up for podcast licenses?
	Let's see.
	Do we get a few?
	We got a couple.
	We were late putting everything up, so maybe that has to build a bit.
	Well, it wasn't that late, but we have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11.
	So I need that list.
	I need that list so I can put everyone's license together.
	That's in the spreadsheet.
	I know.
	I know.
	Okay.
	In the spreadsheet.
	Thank you.
	Okay.
	Some forwards.
	Currently forwarding to NoAgendaShow.com.
	Doomsday2013.com.
	Great.
	Looking ahead.
	We appreciate that.
	Nice that Grayston bought a brick for the Twit Cottage, but we'd much rather you send the cash to the show.
	Although, nice.
	We appreciate it.
	We'll see if the no-agenda brick shows up.
	Yeah, if it shows up on camera.
	I mean, it could be a great PR move, but I don't think we need a lot of those.
	Really?
	I mean, who the hell does not know I'm doing a show?
	Shut up.
	No way.
	JaguarCarsSuck.com from an unhappy owner who is now forwarding that to NoahGeneresShow.com.
	Here's one that I can't wait to do some work on once we have the new system in place.
	ByCuriousAdam.com.
	That's a beautiful domain name.
	Appreciate that.
	Weuniversity.com, as in we, W-I-I-university.com.
	That's a moneymaker.
	That's great SEO. Appreciate that.
	You want to learn about the we?
	You came to the right place.
	Hey, everybody.
	That's all we talk about.
	That's right.
	We.
	We just talk about we.
	You, me, and we.
	ThisWeekAndNoAgenda.com.
	Liking that one.
	Very hip.
	This was actually very cool.
	And I set something up.
	I got Bob sent, actually created four QR codes.
	He says he's been printing these two-by-two stickers out.
	He made it for noagendanation.com, dvorak.org, slash NA, the noagendashow.com, and the podcast feed.
	So I've created a domain name, qr.nashownotes.com, and I've pasted those in there so you can...
	Print that page out.
	It's a pretty bare-bones page.
	You can print it out, and you can make your own stickers.
	We need some design help on the show notes, obviously.
	Those of you who do CSS design, there'll be a link in the show notes, 311.nashownotes.com.
	And finally, I've registered another domain name.
	I just had to bite the bullet, so we have a place to actually go and find information about the tour.
	Kicking off mid-July, hotpockets2008.com.
	It's the domain name, and you can find out about the rig, about the tour, about the route, all the information.
	And Miss Baroness Maggie Vincent of Virginia has started a blog.
	She's great.
	She's a sysadmin.
	She's hooked me up with wireless routers and all this stuff.
	No, you'll be loaded for bear.
	She's perfect.
	She's so perfect.
	And she and Mickey are like the same.
	Completely anal about details.
	Oh, you mean they're organized.
	Yeah, that's what I call anal about details.
	You mean they actually are neat.
	You should look at...
	There's a clean, free, anal, crazy person just actually being organized, just mildly organized compared to us.
	Yeah, we're a mess.
	We need these women in our lives.
	And they're right down to the toilet brush.
	You know, they got everything all figured out.
	So it's fantastic.
	It's going to be very exciting.
	Hotpockets2008.com.
	We're waiting for the lawsuit.
	And, of course, we want to thank our executive producer, Sir Clancy Childs, for helping the show out this week, supporting us, and our associate executive producers, Michael Bowling and Maria Rita Ferreira.
	Support of the show is highly appreciated.
	These are official credits.
	You can put them anywhere you please.
	Anywhere credits are useful.
	And unlike the phony balonies in Hollywood, we will actually vouch for you if you want to be an executive producer for the 312 Club or 333, which is coming up soon.
	You know where to go.
	And meanwhile, everybody else out there has a task.
	You need to go out and propagate that formula.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out...
	We hit people in the mouth.
	Stand in line and proud, everybody.
	Shut up, Spazer!
	So, um, yeah, sorry.
	Well, I wanted to jump into the story.
	I'll just read a little quote here.
	Mainly because we suggested it.
	I think you suggested it.
	That there's something wonky about the E. coli.
	Yeah, I got a couple clips on that actually.
	Well, then play the clip.
	Let me play this.
	Let me just read this quote.
	This particular E. coli variation is a member of the Q104 strain.
	And the Q104 strains are almost never normally resistant to antibiotics.
	In order for them to acquire this resistance, they must be repeatedly exposed to antibiotics in order to provide the mutation pressure that nudges them toward complete drug immunity.
	And then they have a list of drugs.
	This is from the Natural News.
	The editor himself wrote this article.
	A very interesting piece.
	It talks about how you would do this bioengineering.
	It's not bioengineering, like genetic engineering.
	This is the old-fashioned way, like when you breed dogs, you can do this with bacteria rather quickly.
	Yeah, you just put two strains of bacteria together and put it in someone's mouth.
	No, the way they do this is you take the strain you're looking for and then you expose it to penicillin and then you see the ones that survive and you take them and breed them so they're now penicillin resistant and then expose them to another antibiotic and find the one that lives and breed it.
	And you do this in the lab.
	It doesn't take that long.
	It might take a year.
	And the next thing you know, you've got something that kills everybody, basically.
	So this is linked in the show notes at noagendershow.com.
	It has replaced cyber wars with bio wars.
	I thought that would be appropriate for the show notes.
	Actually, it's at 311.nashownotes.com.
	Two clips about this, John.
	One is from an expert.
	An expert.
	A doctor expert, and he actually comes out pretty much and says, well, he doesn't say it's a bioweapon, but have a gander.
	And it's very, you know, I myself, I'm puzzled by this whole thing.
	Number one, this is the perfect bug.
	We have never seen this bug before.
	This bug has two DNA sequences which are very unique.
	You find these isolated...
	These experts sound great, don't they?
	Doesn't he sound like an expert with that accent?
	Yeah, you have to have an accent.
	Yeah, you've got to have an accent for this, yeah.
	...sequences and other E. coli, but to have them two at the same time makes the bug highly toxic, resistant to antibiotic, and these things are transmitted to other E. coli.
	Second, the spread.
	I mean, we have over six nations now in Europe with E. coli, and this type of E. coli is not only killing people, you mentioned 22, but it has rendered over 600 people with kidney failure, and once you have kidney failure, If you survive it, that's great, but this is a problem that you're going to have for the rest of your life.
	If you survive it, that's great.
	Do you tell them don't eat vegetables?
	Do you tell them wash them?
	What advice are you giving?
	Well, listen, right now, there's no source.
	Multiple vegetables have been identified.
	But I question the whole thing.
	I am worried about other motives here behind this E. coli outbreak.
	And this is something that puzzles me.
	And I have asked many scientists, do you think that this is nature acting in a bioterroristic way?
	Or are there something?
	Since when does nature act in a bioterroristic way?
	Unless you're talking about human nature.
	Seems to me like the guy hits on it.
	Now, Russia Today, who I'm liking more and more, I have to say.
	God, could they please get some hot blondes in there?
	My goodness.
	They have spots available in their D.C. office.
	Yeah, I read the...
	We both saw the...
	The job opening, man.
	They do it wrong.
	It's completely wrong.
	It should be female.
	Yeah, blonde, big hoots.
	You can be specific.
	It's a show business.
	It's a show business.
	It's not a problem.
	By the way, you're posting a job?
	Really?
	How about calling some agents?
	You need to do a casting call, Russia, today.
	And no one, no one is better in the business than getting you the right female host than Adam Curry and John C. Dvorak.
	We are your guys.
	We can look at all the tapes.
	We can look at all the tapes.
	We can watch C-SPAN for days on end.
	We can watch the tapes.
	And that's the way it's done.
	In most of the media, for the broadcast media, you put out a call.
	You don't post something.
	No, not like a job, a monster board.
	You call all the agents and they send you all the tapes of all the people that they have, what they're doing.
	You know what we should do?
	We're crazy.
	We should do our own casting call and then we should write the CV and everything.
	We should be agents.
	Yeah, well we can do that.
	Or middlemen or consultants.
	Yeah, but here's what I'm saying.
	Instead of trying to Trying to convince them to hire us to do this so we could eat.
	Why don't we just find the right person?
	And not only will...
	Because you'll get hired immediately.
	Because the guys will go like, wow, she's beautiful and smart.
	Right?
	And then we'd have our own shill on Russia Today.
	I think you've got it.
	All we need is the website.
	That's right.
	And a domain name for it.
	I think that could work.
	We could do that.
	They send those reels, they're called reels, out on everybody.
	Although my experience is that no one ever watches the reels really.
	I know.
	That's why I noticed this too.
	I was actually at CNET. We had a guy and they were looking at reels.
	And I was watching him.
	I was fascinated because I saw one or two people I've seen since get jobs.
	And the guys who do the hiring are so blasé about it.
	They don't pay any attention.
	They're douchebags.
	They're just watching, oh, I don't know, whatever.
	And then they just let the thing run.
	They don't pay any attention.
	There's a lot of talent out there, I believe.
	Real talent.
	Yeah, raw talent.
	That is languishing.
	Noagendacastingcouch.com.
	Has anyone registered that yet?
	Because the shill is suggesting this.
	Noagendacastingcouch.com.
	Perfect!
	We need to put together a nice little website.
	We'll do that on the side.
	Yeah, side gig.
	Maybe looking for some extra money.
	Yeah, after today's showing, yes.
	Not going to be selling bricks.
	No, bricks, boring.
	Hot blondes, awesome.
	Alright.
	So anyway, back to Russia today.
	So they bring this expert on from Buenos Aires.
	He's a consultant.
	This guy's listening to the show.
	I'm convinced of it.
	And I'm really liking Russia today.
	No doubt about it.
	However, you know, one of the points it also alludes to is growing weaknesses in the very structure of the European Union because with all that legislation, with all these controls that Europe is having and actually has on its food supplies, it all of a sudden seems to have a third world contamination crisis which one would not expect to find of all places in Germany and Hamburg and in Lübeck.
	So in a way, I insist, I think that we are seeing Probably different forces within the European Union, maybe some that don't like the way the European Union is working.
	There are a lot of people around that who want to, in a way, see that the European Union should change some of its ways.
	And in specific cases such as this one, it could help to drive the point.
	At the same time, it can help to drive Spain towards a growing financial and economic crisis, which is already looming very close to it on its horizon.
	But are you saying also that the media is quick to respond to this and also push that agenda that you're talking about behind the scenes, as you say, in the European Union?
	Or do you think it's just another story that the media really would want to hype up?
	It's just another story for scaremongering and that the media is mainly to be responsible for this?
	Well, no, I think it would be unfair to say the media are directly only responsible for this.
	However, the media do respond to specific powers, whether it be their shareholders, advertisers, or the people who actually control the media.
	There is a tendency to push specific stories.
	Only one month ago, the entire planet was just watching.
	A royal wedding.
	Then two days later, the alleged killing of Osama bin Laden.
	And now everybody seems to be going hysterical or very concerned about the E. Kali outbreak.
	I think that what we are seeing is, in a way, the engineering of social control so that public opinion can be drawn one way, the other way, and back and forwards all the time, even observing what the results are.
	Because what we are seeing, that's my own personal opinion, I must say, is psychological warfare.
	It's developing in front of our eyes on a daily basis.
	And very often we saw this with the avian flu scare of 2005, the swine flu scare of 2009, where all these things were on the verge of creating a terrible problem and then they just completely disappeared from the media.
	So I often scratch my head when I see stories fully blown in the media and they just completely disappeared.
	Is somebody making some sort of a survey, so to speak, taking the conclusions, taking the data, and then just leaving that story at that and going to the next quote-unquote crisis, whether it be of a terrorist or a pandemic or any other type of political or economic even.
	So, we don't have to show up anymore, John.
	We just play this clip every Thursday and Sunday, and we're all done.
	Basically, he explained exactly how it works.
	So, the psychological warfare angle, I like a lot.
	No coincidence, I'm sure, that we had...
	Coincidence?
	I think not!
	Herr Angela Merkel show up and receive the Congressional Medal of Freedom from our president.
	We've got it covered.
	We've got Germany.
	We've got France.
	We've got Arshil, who's going to win the IMF seat.
	By the way, Christine Lagarde, you see what happened with her Twitter?
	She changed it from Lagarde underscore IMF to Lagarde.
	I guess she got the message that it was a little too obvious.
	A little too obvious, lady.
	So Herr Angela Merkel was there with the president.
	And what gets me, what galled me, the president's out in the Rose Garden with the Gitmo Nation Deutschland peeps.
	And he has this big eagle, what's this big eagle script holder?
	Have you seen that?
	No, I haven't.
	So he has his little lectern, and it's got this huge, like, tungsten eagle.
	Because, you know, it's not gold.
	Tungsten eagle is holding up the script.
	I've not seen this.
	I'm not sure.
	Maybe I haven't noticed it.
	It's really militaristic.
	It's kind of weird.
	Yeah, like something from the Third Reich?
	Yeah, exactly.
	It looks like a Third Reich eagle.
	And I don't know if there was a...
	I hadn't seen this before.
	I don't know if it was a message or what it was.
	And then he says something, and then he has to wait for someone to translate it in German.
	Are you kidding me?
	I mean, this is Germany.
	They speak English in Germany.
	And he starts off with, Guten Abend, everybody!
	He literally did it.
	Guten Abend!
	You said Guten Abend?
	I didn't...
	I should have clipped it.
	I'm not knowing...
	You want to hear it?
	I can probably find it from WhiteHouse.gov.
	Maybe he said, couldn't talk.
	I don't know if he said...
	But it was literally in his same, like, Hello, everybody!
	He said, couldn't talk, everybody!
	And it was just like, wow, really?
	But then they had to wait for the German guy to...
	Oh, I got to stay informed.
	Sign up to get periodic updates from President Obama.
	No thanks.
	Go to website.
	Jeez, this is WhiteHouse.gov, the people's website.
	So here, an eagle lectern is a lectern in the shape of an eagle.
	They are very common in Christian churches and cathedrals.
	The eagle is a symbol used to depict John the Apostle, whose writing most clearly witnesses the light and divinity of Christ.
	In art, John is the presumed author of the Gospel, and also depicted with an eagle, which symbolizes the height he rose in the first chapter of his Gospel.
	The tradition of using eagle-shaped lecterns predates the Reformation, blah, blah, blah.
	Here, here we go.
	Guten Abend.
	Yeah, he did say guten Abend.
	Guten Abend.
	Hold on, start over again.
	Stupid video.
	These guys are the worst video players at the White House.
	The White House.
	Oh, yeah.
	That's because you've got your experts, techno experts.
	$8 million video player.
	Here we go.
	Guten Abend, everybody.
	Yeah, play.
	Good evening.
	Guten Abend.
	Good evening, this is all the German I speak.
	How you doing everybody?
	Angela?
	Herr Merkel.
	Anyway, so there's definitely something going on that's not good.
	Psychological warfare, I think I have to concur.
	Where are all the interviews, by the way, with the family members?
	Where are the hospital shots of people in intensive care and hooked up to dialysis machines?
	Have you seen any of that?
	That disturbs me.
	I don't know.
	I've been watching European TV. They're not going to play that over here anyway.
	Well, I watch European TV, and I haven't seen it there either.
	Now, there's one little throwback to the Anthony Weiner thing that could possibly be in the mix disturbing the waters.
	A new book is out.
	No Agenda Book Club, people.
	Pay attention.
	I have not ordered a copy yet.
	This woman, she's a former Republican aide.
	What's her name?
	Lisa Barron.
	What?
	Really?
	Nice.
	What are you doing?
	I got an audio ad on this webpage.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	They're doing pre-roll audios?
	Yeah, listen.
	Lysol's got you covered.
	Lysol's got you covered.
	They're one of the big advertisers.
	It must be pre-roll.
	That's interesting.
	Yeah, that's Ricketts who does that, I think.
	Anyway, so Lisa Barron released a book.
	Coincidentally, about a headline here, Sex and Drugs Rocks the Republican Party as Political Press Tart Bears All in Sexpose Book.
	And she talks about her sex with Ari Fleischer.
	So, you know, this may have really looked bad for the Republican Party.
	Who is this woman?
	She was an aide to Ari Fleischer.
	She's kind of hot.
	Lisa Barron.
	You know, these women either work for some intelligence agency or not.
	Typically.
	Typically.
	Yeah, typically, because otherwise, if they didn't, they would be shot.
	Hey, baby.
	Come on over to my condo.
	I'll put two in your head.
	According to Ms.
	Barron, she and Ari Fleischer shared a sexual experience in a hotel room during the 2000 South Carolina presidential primary.
	And this is the politics show business for ugly people.
	Writing about what motivated her to go to Mr.
	Fleischer's hotel room, she says, to be able to say I'm with the such and such campaign or I work for Senator so-and-so is to us political junkies what I'm with the band is to Pamela DeBar, which of course is totally true.
	And Ari Fleischer, no looker.
	Not like he's the hottest guy in the world.
	If you know what I'm saying.
	Actually, even visualizing the situation is bad.
	Apparently, the sex she had with him, there was a porno involved.
	It's an even worse kind of visual.
	So what's the name of this book again?
	Oh, crap.
	I just closed it.
	The Life of the Party.
	So that book just came out.
	What do you think the target is?
	Targeting Republicans in general.
	Oh, targeting Republicans.
	Republican Party.
	I'm telling you, there's something going on.
	We'll get to maybe later.
	I don't want to do it now.
	But I have two competing Entertainment Tonight-type clips.
	I've come to the conclusion that there are actually two schools out there going after each other, both intelligence agency based.
	Should we do it now?
	You've said this before.
	Hold on a second.
	Let's just do the...
	And now, back to real news.
	All right.
	You've said this before when we believe there's a battle between the CIA and Obama administration.
	Yes.
	But I think it's actually, there is a number of these wars going on and they're just these guys going after each other.
	And it's interesting to compare, for example, the way Extra, which I have a clip of, On the same day, if you look at the stories that were chosen for extra, it's almost like they decided they have a completely different audience than Entertainment Tonight.
	Except for one story about a movie, which is obviously bought and paid for, all the other entertainment gossip stories are all different.
	They're off on a different...
	They're attacking somebody else or they're bringing people to a different fold.
	And what's kind of disgusting is the Entertainment Tonight fold tends to be oriented toward the British monarchy.
	So shall we do Extra First and then Entertainment Tonight back-to-back?
	Yeah.
	I want people to listen to the stories that are in, this is the same day, listen to the stories that are being promoted, and it's the same, you know, these are just teasers, which is basically all the show is.
	I was going to say, if you're not sitting down, you may want to, because listening to this crap may make you dizzy and nauseous.
	Hit it.
	It's him.
	Congressman Wiener falls on the sword.
	I'd like to make it clear that I have made terrible mistakes.
	The new shirtless shot that forced his tearful confession about sexting six women.
	I'm deeply sorry for the pain this has caused my wife, Huma.
	Should his wife stay?
	Jen Aniston goes public with her new man, Jessica Biel, dating bad boy Gerard Butler.
	Scarlett and Sean still together?
	Hollywood's Couples Mania this weekend.
	Justin and Mila stirring things up at the X-rated MTV Movie Awards.
	Totally platonic.
	The groping, the cursing, the kissing.
	Plus, Ryan Reynolds and Nick Dreamy on extra rumor control.
	Is Patrick quitting Grey's Anatomy?
	Then, Maria Shriver this weekend hinting at a ceasefire with Arnold.
	And why he was out all weekend wearing his wedding wrap.
	Cameron Diaz and Justin on shooting their bad teacher sex scene after their split.
	Was that not awkward?
	And Cameron on the A-Rod rumors.
	If I want to read gossip, I read about somebody else's life.
	Plus, Kirstie down 70 pounds on the Cougar sex diet.
	I've been, like, f***ing with only 20-year-olds.
	Extra!
	Extra!
	Woo!
	Hey, welcome to Extra!
	I'm Mario Lopez.
	Entertainment tonight.
	The most one.
	No, wait.
	Stop.
	Stop.
	I want to do a little in-between here.
	Wow!
	I asked you specifically if I should play him back-to-back.
	And I didn't say no.
	Okay.
	I just want to mention something there.
	For one thing, I didn't mean back-to-back.
	By the way, shirtless sexting with six women.
	That's pretty cool.
	Someone wrote some good copy there.
	Well, the one thing I also...
	You notice that he says falls on the sword?
	You know what that means?
	Yes.
	Yeah, that means...
	Falls on the sword isn't admitting guilt.
	Well, you're doing that to save someone.
	Yeah, you're doing it to save someone.
	Yeah.
	To save Hillary.
	So you think...
	So when he said that, I'm assuming one of two things.
	One, there was some piece of information that Mario Lopez would know.
	Mario is my expert.
	Which seems unlikely...
	Extra!
	Extra!
	Everybody gets Mario!
	I think he just misused it.
	That's possible.
	I mean, really?
	I don't mind listening to your entertainment clips, but I can't really take it seriously in a conversation.
	So do you want to set up entertainment clips?
	You heard all those.
	It's mostly celebrity gossip.
	It's a movie.
	Promoting MTV movie awards.
	This is the same day.
	Now, Entertainment Tonight, the most watched entertainment news magazine in the world.
	Maria in Malibu, her new interview.
	Anything that promotes peace is terrific.
	And all new Arnold out and about.
	As Hollywood takes aim at the ex-governor.
	For the first time in the history of the MTV Movie Awards, the entire balcony has been fathered by Arnold Schwarzenegger.
	All the highlights from the awards show weekend.
	Cameron and A-Rod.
	Sean Penn with Scarlett Aniston's award.
	And this kiss between Pattinson and Lautner.
	Plus the best and worst dress.
	Prince William in a top hat.
	A decked out cage.
	Their big date.
	Plus Pippa pounding the pavement and running shorts.
	And Harry horsing around.
	It's all the royal news in tonight's Celebrity GPX. Cameron, Justin spilling sexy scene secrets from Bad Teacher.
	We couldn't have done that if we were still wanting what everybody wanted for us.
	A sexy Transformers star stripped down while she is number one on Maxim's Hot 100 list.
	Everybody dance, dance, dance.
	Kirstie Alley still losing weight and her dancing reunion with Max.
	Amy Fisher freaking out.
	A Hollywood actress's public implosion.
	I was dead already.
	I was dead already.
	Drama and meltdowns from the all-new Celebrity Rehab.
	I'm just exhausted.
	I'm gonna die.
	Now, in-depth on the biggest entertainment stories from around the world.
	Hello and welcome to Entertainment Tonight.
	I'm Mark Steiner.
	Hello, everybody!
	Alright, so no wiener in there.
	No wiener.
	Was this on the day that he did the conference?
	It was the day.
	It was after he did the conference.
	Oh, the day after.
	Basically, this should be produced about the same time as actually.
	By the way, by the way, by the way, spilling the sexy scene secrets, Pippa pounding the pavement.
	Oh, God.
	I'd like to see Pippa pound my pavement.
	So they have a...
	This is oriented toward the British.
	This is targeting the Republicans and avoiding targeting any Democrats.
	It's a little more obvious on this show.
	It's also got less energy.
	I mean, it doesn't have...
	Mario Lopez is the guy who wants some kind of an Eddie-like guy who's just up-tempo.
	Eddie's from the Mevio office.
	Eddie would be great.
	So anyway, so here's the deal.
	It is another observation.
	Did you notice that they're using 360 and now they have this one, Celebrity GPS? GPS, yeah.
	He's kind of using tech terms, bringing tech ideas into the fold as monikers for logos.
	Yeah.
	But GPS, I mean, come on.
	I mean, I don't know.
	It's for the stupid.
	I find this an interesting study.
	John, it's for the stupid.
	Okay?
	It's for the stupid.
	Yes, well the stupid are the majority of the folks.
	This is true.
	You manipulate the stupid, you got problems on your hands.
	So there's two things that have really been bothering me this week, watching the entire scala and spectrum of media.
	And you're right, C-SPAN was totally worthless.
	I mean, I guess Dennis Kucinich's bill for the Libyan War Resolution got voted out.
	Yay!
	There's your representatives.
	No mention of that, by the way.
	I watched about two hours and 17 minutes of testimony and everyone talking and then they have a vote and it's like, shut up.
	It's okay.
	The president can have all the power.
	But the one thing that really, really bothered me is these huge protests in Greece.
	Not a single, not a single story on any station.
	And the reason is obvious because...
	Bro, these are riots.
	Yeah, well, listen to this report.
	And this, by the way, is a compromise report.
	Thousands of Greeks rallied in central Athens on Sunday evening to denounce politicians, bankers, and tax evaders as the government prepared to inflict another bout of austerity measures.
	It follows a day of protests in the main Syntagma Square outside Parliament where 80,000 protesters gathered to vent their frustrations over rising unemployment.
	Protesters have gathered in the square for the last 12 days but Sunday is believed to be the biggest rally so far in a series of demonstrations.
	Something has to happen so that they go.
	Our kids are without jobs.
	What will they do?
	We are old, but what about our children?
	Things are tough.
	They have to go so that better days can come.
	The Greek government will discuss an economic plan which promises several years of extra budget cuts and faster privatizations, its side of a deal to get a second financial bailout in a year from the European Union and the IMF. So this, of course, is a completely compromised report, but at least it's a report.
	And I love it how they say, rallies.
	It's rallies.
	It's not a riot.
	It's rallies.
	It's not a rally.
	Are they kidding?
	And then you hear people blowing on a whistle.
	I'm rallying.
	No, what's happening is it's not 80,000.
	Oh, by the way.
	Yes.
	By the way, this is part of what you're saying.
	When I was in Madrid, I'm roaming around with this crew.
	We're shooting some stuff.
	What are you shooting?
	Cans?
	Sorry?
	You're shooting stuff like cans?
	Yeah.
	No, we're shooting the video.
	And so I'm turning around the corner.
	There used to be a movie, The Night of the Triffids.
	Oh.
	There's this crazy sound they made.
	So I'm hearing this very weird sound.
	And this was one of the pre-riots in Madrid.
	They're having bigger ones now.
	And we turn the corner and there's this huge crowd of people.
	They all have whistles.
	You know, police whistles.
	And they're all blowing them at the same time.
	And it creates an unbelievable noisy racket.
	That is, you can't even get close to it because it's extremely irritating.
	So it is an effective weapon.
	It's a sound weapon, is what you're saying.
	It's a very good one.
	I've never seen it in this country.
	And it's, believe me, it's very effective.
	And that's what you were hearing in that Greek thing.
	This is a European thing.
	It's a great, great idea.
	Mickey, Mickey, Mickey, get the whistle from the emergency kit.
	We have a whistle.
	You should have a couple.
	We have a whistle in the emergency kit.
	You have one of those...
	One of those red whistles from the Red Cross.
	The Red Cross emergency kit is intended to kill me, by the way.
	Mickey bought one of these.
	It's got like an AM radio with some batteries.
	It's got like a couple of food packs.
	It looks like a brick of hash.
	And it's got like some gauze and a juice pack and one mask.
	And one like surgical mask and a whistle.
	And a flashlight that works on kinetic energy, and that's it.
	What the hell's the whistle for?
	To alert people.
	Hello, I'm here!
	If only I could reach my whistle, I would be saved.
	So, of course, they're rioting.
	They are surrounding the Ministry of Finance.
	I don't think 80,000 is the right number.
	It looked more like 800,000 to me in the pictures.
	It's huge.
	And what's happening is, for those of you who are not keeping up with it, the Greek...
	Government can't pay off their loan, so they need more money.
	The IMF, the International Monetary Fund, i.e.
	the banks, are saying, well, this is not a good investment.
	You know what?
	We want those beaches now, faster, quicker.
	And slaves, work.
	Work austerity.
	She comes.
	Well, imagine like a thousand of those things going on.
	That's good.
	Here, I'll trade you a whistle for the coffee.
	Can I have it?
	I want to annoy John.
	This is a shitty whistle, by the way.
	It's a piece of...
	Crappy.
	Yeah, you need one of the metal ones.
	Yeah, this is not shrill enough.
	Yeah, no, that's no good.
	You'd be thrown out of the riot.
	Yeah, it's like, hey, hey, you with that crappy plastic clear orange whistle...
	Oh my gosh.
	The Red Cross, they're out to kill me.
	Anyway, so this is really, really, really bad.
	Juncker, who is the president, is he the German guy who's in the European Central Bank?
	He's saying like, well, you know what?
	Screw them.
	Screw them.
	They should give us all their stuff and not eat.
	Eat rats.
	This is Greece.
	This is, you know, civilization started.
	This is Greece, ladies and gentlemen.
	You shall eat rats.
	Let them eat rats.
	And give us your beaches and a couple of islands.
	It's the beginning of the end.
	It really, really is.
	Meanwhile, Egypt has just taken a $3 billion IMF loan.
	Here's Egypt in two months from now.
	They're totally screwed.
	And so the other thing that I've been...
	We need to invest in a whistle company.
	I'm telling you, it's going to be big.
	A whistle company.
	It's a good idea.
	Noagendawhistles.com.
	Now, there's a great premium for somebody to...
	Like, we had the coins.
	We should have whistles and someone should do that.
	Have Eric DeShill do them.
	Hi, DeShill.
	He was like, we're here to do bricks.
	No, we're not going to do bricks.
	We're going to do whistles.
	Okay?
	So, I was getting really worried, because as you know, I have my prediction down for Syria being the next country that we take over with the United Nations and we commit a no-fly zone.
	You mean the Wesley Clark theory that you've absconded?
	Oh, yes.
	Well, no, because it was between Syria or Yemen.
	And we weren't quite sure whether Yemen...
	Well, they damn near killed the Yemen guy.
	Somebody went off script.
	Totally.
	And so whenever I'm watching the news and Syria and Yemen, because, of course, this is brown people in deserts.
	You know, that doesn't give you any ideas about going out there and riding at the Federal Reserve like the pictures of Greece would do.
	No, no, no.
	No good.
	You're right.
	That's a very good point.
	The imagery, you don't want to give the American public the Greek imagery because you can see yourself in that situation.
	But you can't see yourself standing out in the middle of the desert holding an AK-47 with a white thing on going, you can't see it.
	No, you can see yourself with a whistle in front of the Federal Reserve.
	That's a good image.
	So we're not going to show that.
	That's why they're not doing it.
	It's totally controlled.
	So I'm getting worried.
	I'm like, oh no, please let it be Syria first because I predicted Syria.
	And we know they're both going to go, so it doesn't matter.
	And then, luckily, here comes our other douchebaguette, Susan Rice, who was our ambassador to the United Noggins.
	And she comes out and the script is in play.
	I'm most concerned that the United States of America express itself clearly and plainly.
	We will be on the right side of history as and when this comes to a vote.
	If others are unable to or unwilling to, then that will be their responsibility to bear.
	I haven't seen much in the way of change.
	I think that we heard several council members, in some instances I would argue disingenuously, use Libya as an excuse and as a ploy to avoid the real issues that we are facing in Syria and in some instances elsewhere.
	We heard some things in this discussion that I thought to be polite, strained credulity, not to mention morality.
	And we will see where a number of council members come out.
	So, script in play.
	And she has the same stylist as Lucifer Clinton, by the way.
	You know those pants that look like, you know, the way too wide, the pants are like just nasty.
	Yeah.
	She wears kind of the woolen jackets on top of all the jewelry that rattles around when she moves.
	Right.
	She really makes my blood boil, this woman.
	It's pretty bad.
	Yeah, so it's going to come to a vote, and the United States will be on the right side of history here, ladies and gentlemen, the right side.
	Now, that's your representative representing you, American people, and your representatives are also there, other members of Gitmo Nation.
	They're all out there in the United Nations telling us what to do.
	What I received a lot of, John, this is a little break.
	And by the way, kudos to you, mon amigo, with you picking up on Jill Abramson with her humming.
	And I spoke to someone who has actually been in a meeting with her.
	And it took her half an hour to get to a certain point, and this person, she'll go unnamed, says she is the absolute worst horrible wicked witch of the West, total C-word you can imagine.
	She's a horrible human being, from someone I trust as a reliable source.
	And who's been in a meeting with her.
	Yeah, who's been in a meeting and apparently it was excruciating for her to get to one point.
	And it was like something that didn't even matter.
	So people are sending us humming clips of her.
	I'm extremely conscious.
	What about the girl thing?
	You feel any pressure there?
	No, I feel pride in the girl thing.
	The laugh of yours is not in control when you listen to this woman.
	I feel pride of the girl thing.
	You know, I'm proud to be the first woman executive editor.
	I'm proud to be the first woman executive editor.
	As I was happy to be the first woman Washington Bureau Chief.
	And, you know, I, in fact, wrote a Week in Review piece when Katie Cora was named Anchor.
	And the point of my piece is, like, when will we get to the point when people aren't fixating on the first woman this or that?
	You know, in some way...
	She's unbearable.
	She really is.
	If we were looking at audition tapes, she would not make the cut.
	By the way, we're so stupid.
	It's a reality show.
	America's Next News Shill.
	It's a reality show.
	That's what it is.
	Thank you, chat room.
	She's going to embarrass the operation.
	She won't last.
	I mean, Katie Couric didn't last.
	I mean, she was a big supporter of Katie Couric, who I knew immediately wasn't going to make...
	I mean, she lasted five years, but she just drubbed the rating.
	She was always in third place.
	You know why?
	Because she's not sexy.
	Katie Couric has something.
	I don't think you have to even be sexy.
	Yeah, you have to have something.
	You have to be personable.
	Personable women who aren't sexy also work.
	Pretty girl who's just personable as hell works very well.
	Especially if she's sharp.
	Yeah, but thank you, darling.
	Yeah, sexy's better.
	Sexy is much better.
	And she's better with the guys, too.
	She hides the hoots.
	You know, the guys should be sexy.
	They shouldn't be some old grown.
	Absolutely, like Stone Phillips.
	You gotta have a name like that.
	Yeah, but Stone Phillips doesn't got the chops.
	I mean, he's okay.
	I'm Stone Phillips.
	And you don't want a crazy name like Stone.
	What kind of a name is Stone?
	It's like this guy Rance Priebus or whatever the hell his first and last name is crazy.
	Hey, at least it's not Henri.
	Sorry, that was a bad joke.
	So one other thing that was not covered on the news, although I will give a minor prop to our National Treasure PBS paid-for broadcasting system.
	They at least covered some of it.
	That's a new one.
	U.S. drone plane.
	Oops.
	What'd I do there?
	I'm sorry, I messed that one up.
	What, the paid-for broadcasting?
	Yeah, I like that.
	I'm using it.
	Okay, here we go.
	U.S. drone planes have struck again in northwest Pakistan the fifth time this week.
	Pakistani officials reported a pair of missile strikes launched from drones.
	They killed 23 people said to be suspected militants.
	The strikes have escalated since the killing of Osama bin Laden.
	Pakistan's government routinely protests the attack and denies that it secretly provides intelligence on the targets.
	Yay!
	Five drone attacks in Pakistan.
	You know, I think there's a war going on over there.
	How could this be allowed?
	It goes on constantly.
	It's like blowing people up left and right.
	And the Pakistanis, they object.
	Yeah, because you're killing people.
	Yeah, well, it's like having...
	What if they had Pakistani drones flying around Washington, D.C.? Really?
	Or even in, like, in the north, you know?
	It's like, even that would not be okay.
	Yeah, in Maine.
	Like, hey...
	Pestuar, dude.
	Like, that's not okay.
	It's not okay to be flying drones.
	And you don't hear these suckers either.
	All of a sudden, you got like a...
	I've seen a number of reports, and I've actually seen these drones.
	I was at Nellison visiting, and they had a bunch of them there.
	Because I think somewhere around Vegas is where they were flying them originally.
	I think they've moved their location.
	But these things, they're not that big, but they're big.
	They're the size of a car.
	Yeah, they're bigger.
	They're a little bigger than a car.
	Yeah, because they have a whole lot of weaponry.
	But when they're up at 20,000 feet, you can't see them at all.
	They don't have any reflection.
	I think they're painted a certain way.
	And you can't see them at all.
	No, and then all of a sudden you've got this hellfire in your butt.
	Yeah, and the next thing you know, the missile's down on you.
	You can't do anything.
	And we're doing the same thing in Yemen.
	I mean, there's reports that we're doing drones in Yemen.
	These things are a plague.
	This is making me angry.
	These are going to be used in America.
	It's a pesky plague.
	It's a plague.
	They're going to be used in American law enforcement.
	That's right.
	I mean, we just had this situation, which was big news, at least on some of the radio talk show guys.
	This poor guy in Stockton, Oh, I have the clip.
	I have the clip of him.
	Oh, I want to play that clip as soon as you get to it, because this, to me, is the most abhorrent story of the day.
	Okay, I have the setup clip, and then I have the clip of the guy.
	Play the setup.
	Christina, the Stockton man, says he was home...
	Early morning hours with his three children sleeping when at least a dozen federal agents came crashing through his front door.
	Kenneth Wright says they dragged him out of his house wearing nothing but boxer shorts and handcuffs and ground him into his front lawn before putting him in the back of a police car for six hours.
	Were they looking for a drug lab or an arms cache?
	Well no.
	These were agents from the U.S. Department of Education searching for evidence of student loan fraud.
	Get out while you can!
	This is crazy!
	Department of Education.
	Hey, slave, have you paid your loan off?
	Come here, I'm going to take you out.
	Drag you out in front of your kids.
	In fact, they threw the kids in the cop car as well.
	Yeah, and it wasn't even about this guy or the kids.
	It was about his wife who he hasn't been with for something like a year or so.
	So the guy is priceless.
	And the guy should get his own show.
	I love the guy.
	Did you see the guy?
	No, I missed the guy.
	The guy is awesome.
	Here we go.
	The guy.
	It's like this, in my underwear.
	In my underwear.
	And he said, put your hands where I can see them.
	And I said, my hands is right here.
	And he said, oh, you're a wise guy.
	And he grabs me by my neck, slams me to the ground.
	And they drag me out the house.
	He puts his hand in.
	He said, so you ain't scared of guns?
	You ain't scared of guns?
	I'm just laying there like, I don't even know what's going on.
	He was like, uh-huh, uh-huh.
	And they handcuffed me.
	And they ripped my underwear in the process.
	My boxers is ripped.
	That's all I got on is my boxers.
	They put me in the back of a police car with my three kids.
	They put us all in the back of the police car.
	They made the kids stay for two hours and they kept me for six hours all the way to 12 o'clock.
	From 6 in the morning to 12, 15 is when I got handcuffed.
	I got scars, handcuff scars.
	They had to loosen the handcuffs twice.
	Then they eventually let me take them out and put them around on this side.
	And I was talking to the police officer.
	But six hours.
	They gave me a piece of paper with my rights on it.
	And they said, these are your rights.
	Am I under arrest?
	No.
	So all that and I never get arrested?
	I'm not even the person you're looking for.
	I'm not even a person of interest.
	But look at my door.
	Look at my door.
	And now you say you're going to call my landlord?
	You say, we're going to call your landlord and let him know so he can get the door fixed.
	Why?
	So you're going to get me kicked out too?
	What's that?
	Man, man.
	They say this is because of student loans.
	So this is what...
	We ain't got hardly no officers, but this is what we got officers for to come tear up people's houses and traumatize their kids and drag them out in the house at 6 o'clock in the morning?
	Hell yeah, my brother.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	So this guy says he wants an apology, blah, blah, blah.
	Why doesn't this guy go to a lawyer and sue the crap out of these idiots?
	And what does the Department of Education, why don't they just subpoena the person?
	What is the point of busting up the place?
	What are they going to do if they found the woman?
	Well, because it's your government at work, and you need to pay off your loan, slave.
	It's the Department of Education and apparently somebody signed off on some judge or they use one of those administrative systems where they can create their own search warrants without going through the normal court system.
	This is typical of these administrative civil kind of action operations.
	I worked for one.
	Did you go bust down people's doors?
	No, we didn't have that.
	But it seems to me that just one minute away, I mean, if all these agencies can do that, it was like the Department of Education, they called the Stockton Police Department and said, we need your SWAT team.
	To go get somebody because they didn't pay their student loan.
	That's right.
	And the idiots at the Stockton Police Department, which should be liable for this, by the way.
	Oh, okay, whatever you say.
	We don't get a lot of work to do.
	We can call up our SWAT team.
	We shouldn't even have one in Stockton.
	And go and bust up the place and mistreat an American citizen.
	This is pathetic.
	Now I'll tell you why this man has not gotten a lawyer.
	Because the black man in the United States of Gitmo Nation is smart.
	He knows that if he does that, his life is effectively over.
	He knows.
	The man knows.
	And it's a horrible thing to say.
	But particularly because he's black, he has no chance.
	Because the police will come and ruin his life if he does that.
	Ruin his life.
	Because it's much worse than it appears.
	That's why he's not doing that.
	All he can do is complain in the media and it'll be over.
	It kind of goes away.
	I have to unfortunately agree with you as sick as that analysis is.
	Yeah, it's horrible.
	It's absolutely horrible.
	I feel like driving the stock to buy the guy beer.
	Well, I'll tell you, this guy and this whole incident and the Department of Education, that idiot that runs it, this should stay at the top of the news, but no, it's just kind of a joke of a story.
	Oh, look what happened.
	Isn't that something?
	D.E., Department of Education with guns.
	Why isn't this on the front page of the New York Times?
	Because Huma might be pregnant.
	Much more important.
	This is why we do this show, John, because the media is compromised.
	From beginning to end, from front to back.
	Compromised.
	I'm going to show myself the world by donating to no agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh, yeah, that'd be fab.
	Now, John, before we start with thanking a couple of people who helped us out this week on the show, there are two quick mentions I need to make.
	One is from John Little.
	Now, if you'll recall, on the previous program, John Little, who was halfway on the way to knighthood, and he said, Dude, I can't donate.
	I need some karma.
	Things are really, really bad.
	We gave him a karma shout.
	And here he replies to me, Dude, I just got a job offer from a place I'd applied to over a month ago.
	No agenda karma works.
	Please use this to spread the word.
	I just asked you for karma this past weekend.
	You gave it to me, and two days later, I have a job.
	Holy effing S, John Little.
	So, now, I'm just passing on the message.
	I don't claim that we have any special powers.
	But somehow, with a no-agenda audience, somehow this karma thing seems to be good.
	Now, one more thing about a reason why we don't take ads.
	And I think this is kind of an interesting story sent to me by an anonymous producer.
	John, did you know about Carbonite's recent acquisition?
	Uh, no.
	Who?
	Okay.
	So Carbonite is this backup service that just about every single tech podcast or show, and even, you know, like CNET as well.
	You know, you'd expect this to be a CNET story.
	Hey, I've heard Carbonite ads on NPR. So they bought Fanfare.
	Now, Fanfare is another backup system.
	However, Fanfare had given all of its customers a lifetime deal.
	Lifetime deal.
	I think they paid $299.
	Lifetime backup of your stuff.
	So Carbonite bought this company.
	And they reversed that and they sent a note to all the Fanfare customers and said, sorry, but this is going to end.
	Now we'll give you your money back, but not really in money.
	It'll be credit.
	But we're ending this deal now that we own the company.
	Now please go and find for me this story because you will not.
	You will not find it because this is exactly how media works.
	Carbonite is a huge advertiser.
	Huge.
	No one will touch this story because they know if they do it, if they make Carbonite look bad, they'll lose their money.
	Classic example.
	Classic.
	I think for people who listen to this program and want to understand why we don't have ads, this is...
	This is something you can understand because I know you listen to technology podcasts and you probably watch C-SPAN. Maybe you read David Pogue.
	I don't care.
	Whatever it is.
	Classic example.
	Carbonite buys a company.
	The company they bought, they start screwing those customers.
	Nobody reports on it.
	And that's just another reason why the advertising model does not work.
	All of media is compromised.
	Yep.
	Now, of course, our model ain't working too great either.
	Yeah.
	That's a difference.
	Sometimes it doesn't work as well as others.
	But that's because, you know, our product probably wasn't good.
	So we have to make the product better, and we do our best, obviously.
	And hopefully today's program will be better.
	Hopefully you're still here.
	Hello?
	Yeah.
	I am.
	No, I know you are.
	Oh, I see what you said.
	I mean a listener.
	So we can thank some people, though, can we not?
	Yeah, we can.
	I was just trying to get Frazier's...
	I kind of screwed up my...
	Your spreadsheet?
	No, I got the spreadsheet, but we got one of our guys who's got a thing for his wife, and it's got to be mentioned, and I had it.
	I was searching it while you were chatting there, and then I clicked something and erased the whole thing.
	No wonder you didn't interrupt me.
	Like an idiot.
	So do you have Joshua Fraser's note?
	Special note in your email?
	That's what I was looking for, and I had it.
	I had it.
	And then you deleted it?
	Well, no, I didn't delete it, but if you give me one second.
	Do you have anything else to yak about?
	Yes.
	I can tell you that after the donation segment, I'm going to play you two short clips from presidential candidate Gary Johnson, who I interviewed on the No Agenda screen.
	Oh, right, right, right, right.
	It's a good thing.
	Okay, I got his note.
	Right, right, whatever you say.
	Shut up, Curry.
	Who gives a crap?
	Yeah, move on.
	So I wanted to make sure that Amanda, his wife, is mentioned for a birthday shout-out.
	Is that on the list?
	Nope.
	He wants that, so they put that on the birthday shout-out.
	Amanda Frazier?
	Yeah.
	And then I have another birthday thing we want to put in there for another guy whose birthday is like today.
	Hey, we're doing great, aren't we?
	You know, the problem is I actually got organized, but unfortunately, when I do that, I get so much paperwork that I have to, like, thump through all this crap.
	You need Miss Mickey.
	I got it down, baby.
	Like, I don't have to worry about this Hot Pockets 2008 tour.
	Put down Jake Hampton from Memphis.
	He wanted a birthday shout-out.
	He's one of our listeners.
	So, okay, so we have a number of people here.
	Joshua Frazier, again, from Salina, Kansas, $111.11.
	He's the one with the wife who needs a birthday shout-out.
	Yep.
	And this is toward his wife's damehood.
	Oh, nice.
	Chris Osborne, Sandy, Utah, $100.
	Hi, John, and now my wife, Sherry Osborne, wants for her birthday to be mentioned on the show.
	Yep, she's on the list.
	If you could give her a birthday mention on the 9th as well as a MILF shout-out, which I think is questionable.
	It's not questionable.
	It's awesome.
	And karma.
	Okay, let's see if I can do a double shot.
	A MILF and a karma.
	This is new.
	MILF? That's one mother I like.
	You've got karma.
	Nice.
	We have a new combo.
	Not quite as good as the one you nailed the other with the combo earlier.
	Daniel Hutner, who's going to be a knight, Murphy's California, in the morning.
	Here's 3333 for a podcast license, another 3333 for a mothership boarding pass if they're still available, yes.
	I throw in a couple extra dollars to cover what I think is the difference for my knighthood, but the knighthood meter didn't show up on no agenda.
	I think he missed John Smith, Sir John.
	I think he overlooked him.
	Oh, okay.
	You're right.
	I'm going to go back.
	Anyway, let's finish this.
	Adam, I enjoyed the interview with Gary Johnson.
	And not to leave you out, John, your version of the Hot Pockets jingle is the best.
	Yeah, it was quite good.
	Ready?
	Yeah.
	Hot Pockets.
	Nice.
	Okay, John Smith.
	Sir John Smith in St.
	Petersburg, Florida.
	Hey guys, sorry even Knights hit the wall once in a while unbeknownst to me.
	I am apparently rich and didn't pay enough in taxes.
	You're not rich any longer, pal.
	At any rate, I am back on track.
	It will go back to me normal.
	I must support now and vow to be a 3333 member.
	Take care.
	Very nice.
	Sir John.
	Yes, that's right.
	That's what's killing us.
	This is tax season.
	People are finally catching up and they got the bill.
	So we're going to do a podcast license for Daniel.
	And yeah, so these will all be up at the end of the show at podcastlicense.com.
	Yeah, we have to.
	We're going to be with people when they start combining these.
	I actually prefer they do a 33-33 separately and then do another one or two rather than do this math, adding a bunch of stuff together because it will get lost in the shuffle at some point.
	Lai Chow, Daily City, California.
	Can I ask for some karma for my work?
	Hopefully my intern job will promote me to a full-time position soon.
	If so, more on the way.
	I can...
	You've got karma.
	And he was also requesting the No Agenda National Anthem, which we'll play at a later time.
	Yeah.
	For him.
	Why?
	Mm-hmm.
	Daniel Kelvin, new listener, first-time donor, Mackinac Island, Michigan, which is a really cool place, 55 double nickels on the dime.
	Josh Aria, Palm Coast, Florida, 5033.
	Also a new listener.
	Kettering, Ohio, $50.
	And he needs some karma.
	Yeah, absolutely.
	Yeah.
	You've got karma.
	Our old pal Chris Schooler, $50 John and Adam, was sitting at home recording my first attempt at a show and listening to the stream.
	You know, don't listen to the stream while you're trying to record a podcast.
	It's not easy.
	And I can feel my douchebag growing back as I have not donated for a while.
	As you know, it starts as just a rash.
	Here's a little something.
	Sorry it's not more, but we are only on one income now.
	But you and this whole thing are well worth it.
	I'll be waking again at 4 a.m.
	to listen.
	So he's a Kiwi.
	Yeah, Kiwi Chris.
	He sent me the show.
	I have not listened to it yet because we had the whole trip and everything.
	But I'm going to de-douche you, Kiwi Chris.
	You've been de-douched.
	And away goes the rash.
	David Middlebrook and Ellen Aberdenshire.
	Aberdenshire.
	In the UK, $50.
	Sir Chris Ghalen.
	Ghalen.
	Ghalen.
	Eric is doing a great job with noagendanation.com, so John, take back your criticism.
	Noagendanation.com is in heel gut website.
	I think you should do the alternative version.
	Hail the foot.
	The Dutch people love you for that.
	Hail the foot?
	Hail the foot.
	Hail the foot.
	Hail the foot, everybody.
	That's it.
	Next time I go to Amsterdam, I'm going to just say, hail the foot.
	Hail the foot and see what happens.
	See what they say.
	That's unfortunately it for this week.
	We hope people will be a little more enthusiastic with today's lesbian-enhanced show.
	Yes, we will have the podcast licenses go up, and they'll be up after the show in the show notes, podcastlicense.com.
	And, of course, we always credit everyone appropriately at the nashownotes.com website.
	It'll be episode number.nashownotes.com, so 311.nashownotes.com.
	And as always, we appreciate your support.
	All you have to do is go to this website.
	Dvorak.org slash NA. There's a multitude of options there for you to select from.
	Of course, channeldvorak.com slash NA and noagendanation.com are all places where you can help us out.
	And those of you who design some CSS work for Episode 311.
	And it's time now to hit the birthdays.
	Chris Osborne says happy birthday to Sherry Osborne.
	Her birthday is today, the 9th of June, 2011.
	Amanda Frazier, happy birthday from Joshua.
	And Jack Hampton from Memphis.
	Not happy birthday from Memphis, but he's from Memphis.
	Happy birthday from John and Adam, all your buddies here at the No Agenda Show.
	It's your birthday, yeah!
	I couldn't hear a word of that.
	Really?
	Well, it was fine by me.
	Okay, well, it sounds good on your end.
	Yeah, it sure does.
	We have one knighthood, John.
	Yeah, here, let me get this thing.
	Nice.
	Daniel Hutner.
	Step forward, Daniel.
	Oh, man, you're going to be so happy because showing up very soon on your doorstep will be the official No Agenda Knight ring as you have supported the program in an amount of a minimum $1,000.
	Your support is highly appreciated.
	And, of course, it earns you the official title of a Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable.
	I hereby knight the Sir Daniel Hutner in this Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable.
	Have a seat here.
	Enjoy your hookers and blows, Chardonnay, Red Boys, whatever you're into.
	And the ring should be going out soon.
	That's what they say.
	So they did show up.
	So that's a plus.
	So it's a ring, a beautiful velour box.
	I mean, I need to get mine as soon as possible so I can start tweeting pictures of it because people really like that.
	It also has a stick of sealing wax in there, red wax, and a certificate of authenticity.
	It's funny because I was talking to Miss Mickey about that.
	And, you know, how can you avoid talking about the Anthony Weiner thing?
	And so we're watching this press conference together.
	And of course, I'm walking between the phone as you're texting me.
	Oh, it's a press conference.
	And we're watching it.
	And I'm like, so honey, let's imagine we're married and you have your...
	Your beautiful ring and everything.
	And this happens.
	I have to go up there and apologize.
	She said, you know, you would have in the morning with the reverse logo imprinted on your face forever.
	Because that's what these hit him in the mouth rings are for.
	It's in mirror.
	So when you hit someone in the mouth, the imprint remains.
	But of course, mine would be a little bit worse because I'm giving her a night ring when I ask her to marry me and hopefully she'll accept.
	It's not reversed on your face, it's reversed on the ring.
	It's reversed on the ring, right.
	So it'll be proper on your face.
	Yeah.
	But I'm going to put a little diamond ink on top of her so it would cut me.
	A little diamondique.
	So that was another thing they pointed out, that Wiener's wife wasn't standing by her man up there on the podium.
	I guess she was thirsty, I have to say.
	I'm not going to do that.
	Second half of the show, everybody.
	Important stuff.
	You know what would have been funny?
	You have her up there with him, and she's like mugging to the camera and winking.
	Talking to her face like that.
	Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
	And raising your eyebrows every once in a while.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, like totally mugging for the camera.
	Yeah, and then we're like, I'm crying for myself.
	I ruined my political career.
	And then she does the fake tears thing with her fist and, you know, turns her around.
	I'm crying.
	A couple things.
	First of all, now we have empirical proof that there is a Mars base on Mars.
	I'm very happy this has showed up on YouTube.
	Everyone can see it.
	As you go to the show notes for the show, and you can see the moon base that an amateur astronomer has discovered.
	A moon base on Mars?
	Wouldn't that be a Mars base?
	A Mars base.
	I'm sorry.
	But I can't hear you protesting it because you've seen the video.
	That was not fixed.
	There's an actual base on Mars.
	But we've known about this for a long time.
	Anyway, the prediction I did make, and I think this irks you, but I made a prediction about a huge solar flare slash storm very soon, and boy did we get one.
	In fact, I'm amazed we're still on the air.
	Shouldn't this be knocking out satellite communications around now?
	I don't know.
	I was looking it up to figure out what the lag time is between the flare, visually seeing the flare, and then having the crap hit the atmosphere.
	I don't know.
	I couldn't find out.
	Well, I think it's just interesting, and I think I get a checkmark.
	It didn't knock anything out from what I could tell.
	No, no.
	But we did get the solar flare, and it's big.
	It was like the whole surface of the sun, like one big poop of heat.
	So I think I get a little check mark next to that in the Little Red Book.
	So you have no solar flare machine?
	No.
	No, you don't.
	Sorry.
	No solar flare machine.
	Mickey, if I ask you, you will answer me, won't you?
	Oh, boy.
	Yeah.
	She's giving me that Huma look.
	She's like punching me in the face with a ring already.
	Doesn't even have it on.
	So on Tuesday, this was very nice, I received a call from presidential candidate Gary Johnson.
	And you can find this at garyjohnson.nashownotes.com.
	We did it live.
	It's unedited as we put it up on the stream and had questions from the listeners.
	And I have two clips.
	I have a segment now, and hopefully we'll have more.
	I can't wait for the call from Mitt Romney.
	I'm sure he'll be calling any minute now.
	I can't wait for all of these great candidates, but at least Gary Johnson reached out.
	He was really nice.
	He was like, hey, it's Gary.
	That's kind of cool.
	Hey, Gary, it's Adam.
	So my new segment is Hold On to the Magic Wand.
	So you are now president.
	What are you going to do?
	And I think it's the best question, isn't it?
	I mean, isn't that what we all want to know from these guys?
	And he's been excluded from the debate on CNN in New Hampshire, which is kind of weird.
	You know about this, John?
	Yeah, I do know about it.
	You're doing something else, aren't you?
	No, no, no.
	So, magic wand, question number one.
	You are now, we wave the magic wand, Gary Johnson, you are now President Johnson.
	We've had one or two of those.
	What are you going to do about our economy?
	I would eliminate the corporate income tax, recognizing that it is a double tax, and reestablish this country as the only place to start up, grow, nurture business.
	I think that in and of itself would create tens of millions of jobs.
	Waving the magic wand, I would eliminate...
	The IRS. I would eliminate the income tax, along with the 17th Amendment, make sure it doesn't come back, and replace it with a fair tax.
	I would abolish the Federal Reserve so that we could, in fact, stop printing money and return to a sound currency.
	And would that be based on the gold standard?
	I would, waving a magic wand, I would return our currency to the gold standard or a commodity base, make the currency commodity base, believing that that should be gold.
	And balance the federal budget tomorrow.
	A Johnson administration would propose a balanced budget for the year 2013, believing that we are on the verge of a financial collapse, given the fact that there's no way we repay $14 trillion in debt when our ongoing deficit is given the fact that there's no way we repay $14 trillion in debt when our ongoing deficit is $1.65 trillion this I'm a free market person, so don't count on me for tariffs.
	I think there's the magic to free markets.
	In free markets, there are bubbles, but I don't think they're as pronounced.
	And when they get corrected, I think they get corrected more quickly, and they get corrected in ways that are ultimately fair, free.
	Top of the hour here at Fox News.
	Let's go to our political pundit, John C. Dvorak.
	What do you think of that, John?
	Well, I mean, I'm all for the...
	I really do think this double taxation thing is kind of ludicrous.
	But I don't know.
	This guy is...
	This guy's been basically taking...
	Yeah, they don't want him to run.
	I mean, I have a clip that's kind of...
	I have a second clip if you want to hear a little more.
	Well, yeah, we can play that, but I'm just going to say I have a clip.
	We don't have to play this, but I'll just tell you what it is.
	So I'm watching the McLaughlin report, and they got Pat Buchanan on there, and he's going on and on, and he says, you know, there's a big hole.
	You know, everybody wants kind of Romney to run, and then you got these other people, but he says there's a big hole in the whole theory.
	If they could find a...
	A populist, political conservative, and he basically describes Ron Paul.
	Yeah.
	And then he never says Ron Paul.
	Well, let's listen to your clip.
	It'll be nice intermezzo.
	Who are heavily concentrated in the South and the Bible Belt.
	It is an impediment, and was an impediment four years ago to Romney, in terms of winning the Republican nomination.
	But if he gets that nomination, and then you've got a race between Mitt Romney, who is a Mormon, And Barack Hussein Obama, who's an African American of the left, evangelicals and fundamentalists, I think in the South will go strongly for Romney.
	The GOP graybeards want Romney to lead the ticket, correct?
	Well, the Republican establishment would like someone like Romney to lead it.
	And I think Huntsman, I don't think Huntsman's really got a shot right now this time.
	Because I think he's eclipsed and also he's a little bit too further left than Romney is.
	But there is a wide open spot inside the Republican nomination run for a populist, conservative, Tea Party candidate with real fire and energy.
	That is, if you can get one of those out there, that can beat Romney.
	You see Mormonism blocking Romney.
	You know, drop it.
	Oh yeah, of course.
	But what's interesting, he says something.
	Here's the problem with Gary Johnson.
	And I told him this in the interview, and I told this campaign guy the same thing.
	I said, where's the fire?
	He talks like this.
	He's a really, really nice guy.
	I think he has some really good ideas.
	He's very Ron Paulish.
	But he's young.
	He has a hot-looking fiancé.
	He's got a nice family.
	He's built a business.
	He was governor of New Mexico for two full terms.
	And everything with him is cost-benefit analysis.
	Of course, he's being marginalized as the pot guy, which actually, in the interview, he says, yeah, people call me the pot guy.
	But that's a problem.
	He's not media savvy.
	You've got to get out there.
	You've got to go spit on someone.
	No, you gotta be like Trump.
	Yeah, exactly.
	A little more Trump would be warranted.
	And the fact, you know, I said, aren't you angry that you're being kept out of the debate?
	And he says, yes, I'm outraged.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	Dude, you've got to get pissed off.
	Yes, I am outraged.
	I am outraged.
	Let's listen to another clip.
	I like what he's saying.
	And he totally could be my candidate.
	Unfortunately, he's a member of the Republican Party, which is supposed to give him the benefit of being invited to debates because he's a member of a party.
	The independents always get screwed.
	He's not getting the benefit of it.
	And I hate the Republican Party as much as I hate the Democratic Party, any party, except the booze party.
	And the Pirate Party.
	But here he is holding the magic wand again, future President Gary Johnson.
	Keep holding on to the magic wand because I have another one for you.
	The biggest expenditure by far is what American taxpayers spend on military and this new concept of homeland security.
	What would you change or do about that?
	I would have never established the Department of Homeland Security in the first place.
	I think that it's very duplicative and that what it does, bottom line, is that it does not make things any safer and that it certainly makes life more intrusive.
	So that would have never happened from the get-go.
	So I would look to be unwinding that in as many ways as possible, returning those functions or giving those functions back to where they probably lie first, middle, and last place anyway without the Department of Homeland Security.
	I would have never gotten into Iraq from the beginning.
	I went on record.
	I said, number one, there's no military threats from Iraq.
	If there is weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, I think we have the military surveillance capability to see them roll out any weapons of mass destruction, and that we could go in and deal with that situation.
	I thought if we went into Iraq, we would find ourselves in a civil war to which there would be no end.
	Afghanistan, I thought initially, was totally warranted.
	That's what we have a military for.
	We were attacked, we attacked back, and after being in Afghanistan for six months, we had effectively taken out al-Qaeda.
	That was ten years ago.
	We're building roads, schools, bridges, highways, and hospitals in Iraq and Afghanistan, and don't we have those same needs here in this country?
	Worse yet is the fact that men and servicewomen are continuing to lose their lives in these locales.
	Let's get out of Iraq and Afghanistan tomorrow.
	And for all of the debate and the discussion that would be warranted about what might or might not happen getting out, I just suggest we'll have those same concerns 25 years from now if that's when we finally decide to get out.
	Libya.
	When we went into Libya, I issued a statement immediately opposing what we were doing in Libya, A through Z. Where was the military threat, for starters?
	Where was the congressional authorization to go into Libya?
	Where is it in the Constitution that says that because we don't like a foreign leader, we should go in and topple that foreign leader?
	No.
	Have we not interjected ourselves into a civil war?
	Doesn't our intervention here, isn't it warranted in about five other countries in the Middle East right now?
	Yeah, so you point the exact problem out.
	You point the exact problem out.
	This is why I like doing these interviews.
	I just let the guy talk and I don't interrupt him.
	Unless he starts becoming a hummer, To protect himself from being interrupted, he's never going to get his message out, ever.
	He should go work for the New York Times.
	Yeah, and learn how to hum.
	It's really unfortunate because the guy makes so much sense.
	I like what he's saying, but he needs some training to go out there and say, hey, you scumbags, all of you!
	You can't do it.
	Guys like that don't have the personality for it, and they can't manage to do it.
	They'll have a million psychological reasons that they can't bring themselves to do that.
	You think it's psychological?
	And by the way, this is the exact reason why he's not on the debate, because it's not good television.
	He's going to bore everyone to death.
	That's the exact problem.
	Yeah, actually, you may have hit it.
	That may be the real reason.
	Of course!
	It's not his politics.
	It's his entertainment value.
	He has no entertainment value.
	Hello?
	Yeah, exactly.
	Check the calendar.
	Yeah, I'm going to call him.
	Say, dude, you're boring.
	I should have just said that.
	Excuse me, Gary.
	You're boring.
	This is the problem.
	You're boring.
	You're boring, you're boring, you're boring.
	You've got to hype it up.
	You've got the right message, but your delivery sucks.
	It's not going to change anything.
	When you get to a certain age, you either have that, Gene.
	Yeah.
	Or you don't.
	Oh, that's horrible.
	He's a wonk.
	He's probably really good at policy.
	Well, it's really sad.
	I hate that.
	It's the way it is.
	Yeah, he's good at policy, but he's never going to get in there.
	No, of course not.
	What the public wants, you've got to remember, they just play that very beginning of extra with that...
	It's winding up to get everyone excited.
	You want a Mario Lopez personality.
	Yeah.
	Or Eddie.
	Hey, wouldn't...
	I'd take Mario Lopez as my president.
	Hey, everybody!
	We got Angelina Jolie at the White House today!
	That's too bad.
	It's really too bad.
	Nice guys finish last.
	Proof is in the pudding.
	Well, I don't know.
	It would be a task.
	I think that...
	Do you think...
	You don't think we could do some media coaching and we could make it work for him?
	No.
	Hmm.
	Because Ron Paul has the fire, but then he goes in and his media fire makes him kooky.
	Right.
	Well, he doesn't do it right.
	I mean, it's the same thing.
	I mean, these other guys, I mean, the guys are good.
	Obama apparently was coached because...
	Apparently?
	If you read the early reports, especially the article, I think, in the New Yorker where they said the guy was like so dull, he would sound like a professor.
	And he still drops into that if you watch him now in his press conference.
	I know.
	He'll...
	And then he gets real long-winded, and he repeats himself, and he's slow talking.
	Professor.
	But he was coached, but he was amenable.
	Some people are amenable to it, some people aren't.
	I don't see, I see very few, somebody of a politician, they've got to be full of themselves to get to that job in the first place.
	They're not going to be amenable to being coached.
	It's like coaching a great basketball star.
	He says, look, I'm so great.
	I'll tell you what I'm going to do.
	I am going to offer my services to coach this guy.
	I think we can do it.
	I think it's absolutely possible.
	It's not.
	Well, thanks for trying to save the country.
	He's a good-looking guy.
	He looks pretty good.
	He looks like...
	That's a good point.
	He visually doesn't come to me.
	He looks like that comedian from...
	That's not good.
	Well, this is the great...
	No, it's great.
	He looks like that comedian that's on What's My Line?
	The tall, kind of thin guy.
	What a callback.
	Well, whose line is it anyway?
	I'm sorry.
	Whose line is it anyway?
	The one with Drew Carey?
	Are you consulting the book of knowledge?
	I'm looking at the Google book of knowledge.
	No, no, no.
	You have to consult the actual book of knowledge.
	What's the name of that comedian?
	My Firefox now goes, not respond.
	This is Firefox.
	There it comes.
	When you look for images, it's just a mess.
	No, no, but if you...
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Ryan Stiles.
	There you go.
	I'm going to the Book of Knowledge.
	I'm referring.
	I'm going as fast as I can.
	Oh, that guy.
	Now, look at...
	Now, this is great.
	Now, look at Ryan Stiles.
	This is fantastic.
	We can put Ryan Stiles in.
	This is great!
	You know, I have seen this guy Johnson on Fox, I think.
	Please Google Ryan Stiles right now.
	He's actually not...
	Go look at Ryan Stiles.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	I'm looking.
	Jeez.
	I've got a whole concept.
	We have Johnson.
	He's got the message.
	But then whenever there's a bait, we bring Ryan Stiles in.
	He can read the script.
	The guy's a genius.
	Oh, this guy.
	Brian Stiles, the Canadian guy.
	Yeah, doesn't he look just like him?
	He looks enough like him that you could probably slip him in.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Except for the Canadian accent.
	He's going to talk a little like this.
	No, no, no, no.
	Dude, the guy is a brilliant comedian.
	He does impromptu, off-the-cuff stand-up.
	The guy's amazing.
	He could do it.
	Well, anyway, we could coach him.
	No, we could just put him in.
	We got two Obamas.
	Why can't we fight with two Gary Johnsons?
	No.
	No, I've heard Gary Johnson on some things, and he definitely, the policies are dynamite.
	Policies dynamite, unfortunately.
	Well, hey, by the way, John, it's official.
	Did you know that?
	Osama bin Laden is dead.
	Says who?
	Says Wolf Blitzer and Al-Qaeda.
	Well Wolf, the video about 30 minutes long is the first from Ayman al-Zawahiri since the death of Osama bin Laden.
	The video is in large part a tribute to Osama bin Laden.
	He went to his god martyred because he said no to America.
	Ayman al-Zawahiri does not proclaim himself bin Laden's successor, but with the tape he appears to be positioning himself.
	He wants to show to the al-Qaeda membership around the world, their supporters, that he's the paramount leader of al-Qaeda, that he's the one that's delivering the eulogy for Osama bin Laden.
	In the video, Zawahiri cheers on the uprisings in Libya, Syria and Yemen.
	They need to continue their struggle, their rage, and their sacrifices.
	Al Qaeda doesn't like these movements, but they recognize they have no option but to say, if we want to be relevant, we better stick with the population.
	And the population has spoken, so let's pretend like we're with them.
	In the tape, Zawahiri pledges support to Mullah Omar, the head of the Taliban, urges the Muslim masses to rise up against what he calls a treacherous Pakistani regime, and he makes repeated but unspecific threats against the U.S. I call for jihad, my beloved people, to fight those who fight Islam.
	Since the raid that killed bin Laden, U.S. counterterrorism officials have assumed Zawahiri was in deep hiding, afraid for his safety.
	Analysts believe he must have been very anxious to be seen and heard because releasing this video involved risks.
	For instance, using a courier, like the one that led the U.S. to bin Laden.
	Intelligence analysts have poured over previous al-Qaeda videos trying to determine where they were taped.
	This video does not provide any obvious clues.
	The background is pretty nondescript.
	I guess it's official confirmation, more confirmation from al-Qaeda now, from Ayman al-Zawahiri himself, that Bin Laden is dead.
	The douchebag.
	Well, I guess that whole stupid video, that's proof, official confirmation.
	It's official.
	Teal of approval.
	Wolf Blitzer says it's dead.
	So, that guy, what's his name, Zakari, whatever his name is, he says he should become a martyr, but not according to all the forums.
	Because Osama bin Laden was shot with a pork bullet.
	Pork bullet?
	Look here.
	Here's the search you want.
	Pig fat gun lube.
	Pig fat gun lube Osama.
	And you'll see all the stories.
	Apparently there's a company in there.
	I think they're in the Midwest someplace.
	And they sell a gun lubricant that is made from pork fat.
	There's a number of the U.S. military using this to lube up their guns because then the bullet picks up just enough trace elements of the pork fat to negate any possibility that a Muslim extremist Islamist will go to heaven.
	This is actually a Mother Jones story.
	Did a Navy SEAL kill Osama bin Laden with a pork-coated bullet, thus denying him entrance to paradise?
	This highly unlikely claim coming from a shady website selling gun lubricants that it guarantees to be 13% USDA liquefied pig fat.
	America's secret weapon.
	Hey, you Muslim terrorists over there, I'm going to shoot you with some pig fat.
	Squirrel!
	Look out!
	That's the stupidest thing I've ever seen.
	I mean, really.
	And it made it to Mother Jones.
	Nice.
	That's really, really nice.
	Unbelievable.
	So Osama got...
	He's not up there.
	He has no virgins.
	He's not with the virgins or with the Virginians, whoever they are.
	The whole thing is just abhorrent.
	Everything.
	The whole thing.
	And here's...
	So you know what's supposed to happen?
	We're supposed to pull out a poppy stand next month.
	And the original promise was 100,000 troops will come home.
	And so...
	Hello, everybody.
	President Obama here.
	I'm going to talk to you about the troop withdrawal in this interview.
	We're not going to do anything precipitous, but what I've already said to the American public and what I've said to the Afghan people is that it's time for the Afghans now to take responsibility for their own security.
	When did you actually hear him say, Hello, Afghan people.
	It's time for you to take responsibility for your actions.
	We are training their security forces up.
	That transition will take place over the next couple of years.
	But by killing bin Laden, by blunting the momentum of the Taliban, we have now accomplished a lot of what we set out to accomplish ten years ago.
	Mr.
	Obama also spoke with Afghan President Hamid Karzai today for an hour by videoconference.
	Skype, no doubt.
	Where did you get this clip?
	This is...
	I don't know.
	I don't know.
	It was a...
	I don't know.
	I'm sorry, I don't know.
	Make his decision about the size of the initial U.S. pullout later this month.
	For his part, Ambassador Crocker cautioned today against moving too fast.
	Yeah, see, they brought the new shill in, this Crocker, this Crocker thing, dude.
	And his job is to say, oh, no, no, no, we can't pull out 100,000.
	You know, we haven't trained Afghan troops.
	Who cares?
	Please, please.
	We could have been training these guys since they're 10 years old.
	How long does it take?
	What is the total length of army boot camp?
	Is it ten years?
	When you join the army you spend ten years in boot camp?
	Eight weeks.
	On Paris Island.
	Eight weeks?
	Eight weeks.
	Eight weeks is boot camp.
	So why is it taking so long to train the Afghanis?
	Well, you know...
	Are they that dumb?
	Is that what we're saying?
	We're saying Afghanis are dumb?
	I mean, what is the subtext here?
	Well, I mean, you and I both know it has nothing to do with security.
	It's all about the UNESCO pipeline.
	Yeah, what do you please?
	No, but it's...
	And so you just watched next month, the president's going to say, with this Crocker guy, the new shill who's in, who we discussed, part of the Shadow Puppet Theater.
	Oh, no, they're not ready yet.
	No, we'll take out...
	What did I predict?
	5,000.
	You watch, 5,000, and then it'll be non-combat troops.
	It's stupid, the whole thing.
	We're going down the tubes.
	We really are.
	It's scary.
	It's scary.
	But that's okay, because we're safe at home with the new scanning technologies, John.
	Have you seen this video of the new scanner, the IATA? No, I've heard about it.
	I've not seen it.
	Well, okay, you can't see it now, but you can listen to the video.
	It's just as exciting.
	The checkpoint.
	This point consists of two parts.
	The first part is passenger pre-screening that's done by governments, and that's aided by the creation of a known traveler type system.
	They're common.
	If you're in the Netherlands, you may know it as the premium system.
	If you live in the United States, it's called global entry.
	Traveling solutions where in exchange for passenger information, the passengers allowed a faster travel experience.
	And then what we do is we create an enhanced security lane to take the three to nine percent of passengers that get enhanced screening every day at all of our airports and move them out of the main line.
	And I think every passenger is familiar with what happens with an enhanced screening program when they see it at the airport.
	A security screener will shout, move to the left, move out of the line.
	There's going to be a rapid scramble for bags, and the line is going to come to a complete stop.
	You walk through, you keep your stride, you're able to carry your bags with you and drag your trolleys behind you as well.
	And shut up, slave, and give us your information.
	It's really unbelievable what's going on.
	So now you'll be at the known traveler system.
	It'll be everywhere, John, as part of the national ID. Known traveler, you're known.
	It's okay, you're known.
	We've got all your info, you're known.
	We've got your facial recognition on Facebook.
	Do you see that thing?
	Have you paid your student loan?
	Yeah, yeah.
	Sorry, you can't travel.
	Sorry, you can't travel.
	Your student loan has not been paid.
	That's right.
	That's right.
	Heaviest bombing in weeks in Tripoli, Libya.
	Wait a minute.
	Are you telling me they're bombing the...
	I thought it was just a no-fly zone.
	Well, let's hear what the President said on March 21st, 2011.
	Let me see.
	March 21st, April 21st, one month.
	May 21st, two months.
	June...
	We're almost three months, John.
	Am I miscalculating?
	March, April, May...
	Seems like about three months, yeah.
	Almost three months, yeah.
	Let's see.
	It is U.S. policy that Gaddafi needs to go.
	But, let me emphasize that we anticipate this transition to take place in a matter of days and not a matter of weeks.
	Well, to be honest...
	Wait, wait, hold on a second.
	What did he say?
	A matter of days, not weeks.
	He didn't say months.
	So, to be honest, he was kind of smart about that.
	He didn't say months.
	What he was really saying is not a matter of days, not weeks, but a matter of days and maybe months.
	Months.
	Months.
	A lot of days and 90 days.
	You know what?
	Where's my whistle?
	We've got to start whistling, people.
	You know what, John?
	I think you've really hit upon something.
	No Agenda Whistles is a great idea.
	And we're not calling people out.
	We're whistling at you.
	Yeah.
	Nice, good metal police whistle.
	Those things are great.
	Everybody in the pool girl uses, you know.
	Hey!
	Pool girl.
	You know, she's the one with a whistle around her neck.
	She's coordinating activities on the boat.
	I don't have a clip of this, but the president also said, maybe that was in his weekly address, we can live the American dream.
	What were the job numbers?
	We had 54,000 new...
	By the way, the numbers that need to be just to keep on an even keel, the number of people entering the job market on a month-to-month basis based on the population is 150,000.
	Right, so there are 54,000 new jobs.
	Which means we're down 100,000 right there.
	Half of those were created by McDonald's.
	And that's your American dream, ladies and gentlemen.
	Would you like fries with that?
	Oh my goodness.
	Upsell.
	Yeah.
	For an extra 25 cents.
	Yeah, I can supersize you.
	I can supersize you.
	No problem.
	That's what I'm doing all day.
	I'm supersizing people.
	No, let's be preoccupied with looking at a congressman's penis.
	Nice.
	Wiener.
	Yeah.
	Hey, and everyone, get off of Facebook now because this facial recognition stuff that is probably already in place is bad.
	It's going to auto-tag you.
	And please, if you have a picture of me on Facebook, take it off.
	Just take it off.
	I can't even tell you the story.
	No, come on, tell me.
	A friend of mine, a friend of yours as well, was running two Facebook profiles.
	One for this person's job, and one as their actual personal thing.
	And this person got tagged, auto-tagged in a picture as the other person.
	And so they closed down the work profile.
	And then the only way you can open it up is if you scan and email...
	An official government ID with your name on it to Facebook.
	Oh, wait.
	Hold on a second.
	Oh, yes, sir.
	Oh, yes, sir.
	You cannot...
	Because it's against the rules to have a fake name on Facebook.
	You cannot...
	Yeah.
	Yeah, it's against...
	Read the terms of service.
	They change every day.
	Why is there a fake John Dvorak Facebook page?
	Well, you can tag him and his profile will get shut down.
	I'll leave it there.
	It's better that way.
	Trust me.
	Yeah, no, I'm just leaving it there.
	But this person was using that Facebook page for business, for real business, and it got shut down, and this person has no way to have it reopened because it was under a name that is not this person's real name, and this person does not have an official government ID. I can't believe people use this product.
	Yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	It's so sad because I have to use it because it's the only way I can communicate with my daughter.
	For some reason, it's like Facebook, you know, and she has a Tumblr and she has all kinds of other stuff and she hates Facebook.
	But, you know, all her friends are there.
	It's like, you know, all the slaves are happy there.
	And her profile gets deleted all the time, you know, for offending photographic material.
	At least she keeps up with the old man.
	Easy does it there.
	So, yeah, no, I find it abhorrent that you have this situation.
	And every single person, I say, don't use Facebook.
	And I know what's going to happen.
	One day, Mickey's Facebook is going to get deleted and it's going to be a huge problem because it's just going to be a problem.
	And she's going to be very, very sad.
	Very, very, very sad.
	And it's going to be a sad day.
	And I hate, every day, I hate looking, I know what's going to happen.
	Because we've been through this.
	We're old enough to know.
	And now you've got this automatic facial recognition?
	Please, this frightens me.
	So what was the point of this automatic facial recognition?
	Actually, the point of it was exactly what you described.
	Yeah.
	Auto-tag.
	Auto-tag.
	Oh, wait a minute.
	If you're an intelligence agency and you want to find people...
	I always use these systems for due diligence.
	So I want to find all the pictures I can of somebody I'm going to meet.
	So I go on Flickr and I search for them.
	But if I have auto-tag, I'll find them in pictures where they're not tagged.
	That's right.
	And there's a lot of pictures that were, you know, a lot of people just post stuff.
	They never tag it.
	They never say who's in the picture.
	And now if you can auto-tag with facial recognition, now I can find all the pictures of you.
	Uh-huh.
	Oh yeah.
	It's very valuable if you're spying on somebody.
	So why do people just climb on board?
	I don't get it.
	Because they're stupid.
	I hate to say it.
	That's why we're doomed forever to do this for lunch money.
	Because the majority of people who are awake and with the program and listen to the show is small.
	Very, very small.
	Well, we wake up a person now and again.
	But most of the people are, you guys are crazy!
	Yeah.
	Nut jobs.
	You're just crazy.
	I had a dinner last night with three guys from Qatar.
	Really?
	Oh, you're supposed to say Cutter.
	Yeah, Cutter.
	That's what they pronounce it, by the way.
	Really?
	The guys from Qatar pronounce it Cutter?
	Yeah.
	Crazy guys.
	Joke's on me.
	Whoops, who knew?
	All right.
	So, they're Lebanese, but they live there.
	And they all say Cutter.
	And...
	The Middle Easterners and the people from that area, the people in Lebanon do not like to consider themselves Middle Easterners.
	I didn't realize that.
	They're real adamant about it.
	But that's all they do is talk about this sort of thing constantly.
	The culture down in that whole area is just to discuss political things from a perspective of like, you know, you don't know the whole story.
	Mm-hmm.
	And so we had a lot.
	I didn't get any good stuff from them, unfortunately.
	They talk a big talk, but they got nothing?
	Is that what you're saying?
	They didn't have anything.
	They were just, you know.
	They got nothing.
	They're listening to me.
	Well, it's funny because I think you received this as well.
	There was a program, and I think we should listen to this, because there's a guy who has a book out called, this is from the BBC thing, I know you received it as well, John.
	Where do I have, I have the clip, I just want to set it up properly.
	Well, of course I can't find it offhand.
	So it's a BBC program on Radio 4.
	This guy has written a book about conspiracy theories and theorists in the United States.
	Should we listen to that?
	Yeah, I listen to the guy.
	It's about four minutes.
	By the way, this is a podcast from the BBC. This is a download from the BBC. No, it's a download, not a podcast.
	Visit bbc.co.uk slash Radio 4.
	I would say only a small minority had mental health difficulties.
	By the way, we all have mental health difficulties.
	One or two percent.
	Most of them, it was a political and social phenomenon.
	It was toxic distrust of public institutions, and they had been radicalized over the Internet or through political propaganda, but they did not, for the most part, have clinical mental health issues.
	You focus a lot of the book on the truthers, the ones who believe that 9-11 didn't happen in the ways commonly described.
	It was some conspiracy, don't you?
	Yes.
	In fact, originally my book was just going to be about 9-11 truth activists.
	These are the folks who, as you say, believed in 9-11 was an inside job by the Bush government.
	But what I found was that when I interviewed these people, they embraced a whole bunch of other conspiracy theories.
	And it became clear to me that conspiracism had become a sort of creed for these people.
	And it wasn't just about 9-11.
	It's a religion is what it is.
	It's about all of society.
	Well, give us the psychology.
	By the way, do you hear the edits going back and forth from the interviews?
	Totally.
	And the questions are put in later.
	It's abhorrent, this.
	What is it in the head that drives otherwise sane people to believe weird and wacky things?
	All right.
	This is so lovely.
	It's definitely something wrong with my head.
	It's a checklist coming up, John.
	You can tick them off.
	Well, as I say, the universal aspect is distrust.
	Distrust of government, distrust of media, distrust of organized religion in many cases, distrust of all public institutions and society.
	Yes!
	This book is for me!
	But I also think that there is an impulse to align ideology with facts.
	They want to make the world as they imagine it appear like the world as it is.
	So, for instance, in the case of a 9-11 conspiracy theorist, In some cases, he might be a very left-wing ideologue who believes that all evil originates with the United States.
	And then when 9-11 happened, which was evil perpetrated against the United States, he suffered cognitive dissonance because ideology conflicted with reality.
	Cognitive dissonance!
	This is bulk.
	I mean, we can play the whole thing, but I don't think we should.
	No, no, it's okay.
	No, I agree.
	I just want to point out a couple of memes.
	He uses radicalized.
	He says toxic distrust as opposed to a I mean, there's a lot of people who don't trust government, and they shouldn't.
	But he can't say that.
	He never says it, by the way.
	Any distrusting of anything is toxic, which is bullshit.
	And then he also says, he uses the term otherwise sane.
	So, well, Adam, I really like that...
	An analysis of you otherwise sane.
	Otherwise sane, yeah.
	And then he uses the old trick of the checklist plus the non-inclusive listing plus an inclusive at the end, kind of a catch-all.
	And it goes like this.
	It's a distrust of media, which we argue, and it's logical, and it's true.
	A distrust of government, which is you shouldn't trust the government.
	You never should.
	Yeah.
	Distrust of religion.
	We have all these scandals and all these religious things going on, scammers and pedophiles and the rest of it.
	And then the fourth one is the bombshell, which is the distrust of all.
	This is the word all, which means you did everything, which is just to say, get you into this, well, well, whoa, that can't be good.
	Yeah.
	This guy is an idiot.
	Let's hit it.
	Douchebag!
	There you go, he's a douche.
	Give him another one.
	Two douchebags.
	Douchebag!
	A double douchebag!
	A double bagger, everybody.
	Good morning to you, double bagger.
	So, talking about douchebags...
	Who you got?
	Liberty County Sheriff's Office in Texas.
	Yeah.
	So apparently, this is a big story.
	In fact, when it was breaking, Fox had it on their news coverage.
	And it sounds like there's actually some reporting going on here.
	I have a clip.
	It's the Fox, Texas.
	It's Texas fiasco.
	Yeah, play the fiasco clip and then we'll summarize.
	The authorities there now say they have no evidence of deceased bodies at this site where there are media reports of up to 30 bodies discovered initially.
	Those primary reports, preliminary reports, said the bodies had been found and were of children and possibly dismembered.
	One media account said authorities were waiting for a search warrant to go through that home.
	The FBI says it is offering its help.
	Fox News is continuing to follow this story throughout the evening.
	At this point, the Liberty County Sheriff's Department is saying that they have no evidence of deceased persons.
	Persons at this point, despite the initial reports of 25 to 30 bodies discovered, they did get a tip that told them about this location.
	They did not elaborate.
	We'll have updates.
	Okay, you do get finished.
	Stop.
	You know, I hate to tell you.
	So, by the way, this relates to distrust of the media.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	They already said there's 30 bodies and they're reporting all this bull crap.
	You know what this story's about?
	Apparently, and there's a Reuters story on it, that now the police are after the tipster.
	Somebody who claimed to be a psychic.
	Hmm.
	Call the police department, who obviously there's some grudge against this person, and they said there's a bunch of dead bodies in this guy's backyard, and they went on and on about it.
	The police department waltzed it over to some judge, a search warrant, to some judge who says, oh, a psychic?
	Well, sure.
	Signed it off.
	Here's the warrant.
	Here's your warrant, people.
	This is how much due diligence we do here.
	Was it a male psychic or a female psychic?
	You know, kind of thing.
	Oh, okay.
	Did they spell it right?
	Yeah, yeah.
	Psychic.
	Psychic.
	Psychic, yeah.
	They go out there and dig the shit.
	They just ruin this guy's place up.
	I don't know.
	This is unbelievable.
	Well, unfortunately, I'm very worried that this is a pedophilia cover-up from the elites.
	And if we don't hear anything about it anymore, then my suspicion only grows.
	Well, it's a possibility, but I'll tell you this.
	We have no idea what the hell's going on because this immediate distrust of the media.
	We're not getting the story.
	The psychic thing could be total bullcrap or not.
	But right now, all we know is a psychic...
	But I can't believe they make themselves look this stupid with a cover story that involved the psychic.
	So, I mean, the whole thing is a mess, and this is Texas.
	So, from the chat room, I get Discovery News...
	Psychic fiasco.
	Texas mass murder raid.
	A hoax.
	So here's your distrust of the media.
	Police investigated.
	It all turned out to be a false alarm.
	There were no dead bodies.
	The psychic was wrong or lying.
	There you go.
	We fell for it.
	We even discussed it for three seconds.
	But meanwhile, we have that other guy on his conspiracy theories, and God knows we have distrust of the media.
	We can't have that.
	No.
	That person, it's ridiculous.
	I don't even want to go into it.
	I'm done.
	I've got two quick clips.
	One to cheer you up.
	No, actually, I'm lying.
	They're both going to bum you out.
	James Carble, who I actually like, was he not the campaign manager for Clinton?
	Yeah, the flasher.
	The flasher?
	He's a flasher.
	Really?
	Like he flashes his naked penis to women?
	Yeah, yeah.
	What do you mean?
	I miss this.
	You didn't know this?
	No, he's a flasher?
	It was discussed in the book about the red, white, and blue, and then it was in that movie.
	They had it in the movie.
	They didn't show him.
	I never saw that movie.
	The movie had him constantly flashing, and then people going up to him and saying, stop it!
	Dude, stop flashing.
	Really?
	He's a flasher?
	That's outrageous.
	Well, now the clip is no good.
	You've ruined his credibility with me.
	Carvel's on, I don't know, some stupid Fox show.
	They're all stupid.
	But I do think the guy has his finger on the pulse of what's going on.
	He seems to be a straight shooter, except for the flashing...
	Well, he shoots straight there, too.
	Here's what he has to say about what we can look forward to.
	Oops.
	Sorry.
	...to taking a pay cut in the last year.
	I mean, you can't have...
	If you're 50 years old and you're providing for your family and you've been out of work for a year and a half, you're not the same person.
	This is the tragedy of unemployment.
	It's a real tragedy of unemployment.
	And a lot of people, even if the economy comes back, the prospects of a lot of people finding a job are not good.
	They're blaming God!
	No, look, people, this is, again, a humanitarian, and you're smart enough to see this, and people...
	If it continues, we're going to start to see some civil unrest in this country.
	I hate to say that, but I think it's eminently possible.
	Right, civil unrest.
	I hope so.
	It's about time.
	I think it's obvious it's going to happen.
	It's about time, and that's why they're not showing Greece on the television.
	Right, because I think you're dead on on the Greece analysis.
	That is the reason.
	They won't show Spain.
	They showed a little Spain, but it's all sit-ins.
	Yeah, sitting on the ground, exactly.
	But the whistling stuff, that's great.
	We need to propagate the whistles.
	Yeah, you know, I didn't think about that until you witnessed it, until you actually saw it happen, and you witnessed the horrible noise.
	Yeah, and I'm telling you, it's Night of the Triffids, I think is the name of the movie.
	Because I'm walking around, I said, what are they, filming a movie around here?
	This is crazy sound, it sounds like a lot of, like a million locusts or something, and then you turn the corner when you get hit with a full blast?
	Oh my god!
	It is really annoying.
	So I'd like to remind everybody just briefly, John and I have promised each other that we'd play more of these clips that we pick up along the way.
	When the horrible earthquake happened in Haiti, what took place was an amazing turn of events where President Obama asked former Presidents Bush and Clinton to ask for money.
	We just need cash.
	I know a lot of people want to send blankets or water.
	Just send your cash.
	And President Bush even took it a little further.
	Shysters show up and take advantage of people's goodwill and generosity.
	So, now I'm listening to one of my favorite radio shows called Black...
	Agenda Radio.
	Which is kind of cool, because we have no agenda, they're black agenda.
	And there was a new report, I don't think we talked about it on the show, about the number of dead in Haiti.
	And these guys, they just nail it.
	USAID just recently, as you said, issued a report that revised down the number of killed in the earthquake from between 200,000 and 250,000 to between 46,000 and 84,000 people.
	The report was, as I said, commissioned by USAID. They hired LTL Strategies, which is an international development and business consulting firm To write a report that's actually officially titled Building Assessments and Rubble Removal in Quake-Affected Neighborhoods in Haiti.
	The major author of the report is an academic by the name of Timothy Schwartz, who is currently writing a book called Rape, Murder, and Voodoo on the Island of the Damned.
	He's already published another book called Travesty in Haiti, a true account of Christian missions, orphanages, fraud, food aid, and drug trafficking.
	So you have a sense that Dr.
	Schwartz has an eye for the sensationalist headline.
	He says that he personally has no intellectual interest in how many people were killed in the earthquake, whether it's 60,000 or 200,000.
	It's still a huge number.
	But as we all know, there's a history of numbers being used against black people.
	Obviously, when it came to the slave trade, people always want to revise that number down to say that slavery wasn't as bad on the African continent or for African people as we might say it was.
	And the larger question in the context of Haiti seems to be that USAID has also been criticized for not coming through on their promises to provide housing.
	We've also seen the destructions of the IDP camps in Delmas and in other areas of Port-au-Prince by the mayor of Delmas using Mexican-trained paramilitaries.
	And at the same time, while IDP camps are being destroyed and the homeless from the earthquake are being doubly displaced, we've seen the Clinton-Bush Haiti Fund pump in money to fund the lovely Oasis Haiti in, I think, the neighborhood of Pechenville, which is a luxury boutique hotel that's going to be housing Haiti's elite as well as aid workers.
	The Oasis Haiti.
	That's where we've got to book our next vacation, John.
	Unbelievable.
	Oasis Haiti.
	The Bush Clinton Foundation funding the boutique hotel Oasis Haiti.
	Just send us your cash.
	I'll get comped.
	Don't send us...
	I'll get us comped.
	We'll even get a limo from the airport.
	Oh, absolutely.
	Get comped, limo from the airport.
	We have to get there.
	We have to find some way.
	We have to get some comp air...
	Yeah, well we have to get one of the oil jets like they had Sweet Mickey Martelli on them.
	Those guys aren't going to compass, I don't think.
	I think one of the airliners might.
	Fantastic.
	Just beautiful.
	Just beautiful.
	Yeah, just as we predicted, by the way.
	Yes, and I've been harping on it for years now.
	And by the way, how do you feel now about texting that money?
	And how about you stupid idiots that entertainment drones who did that whole, oh, save Haiti?
	I don't even know if Sean Penn is still there or not.
	I'm concerned about him.
	Well, they had some pictures of him on Entertainment Tonight that indicate he might be in the U.S. I don't think he's there at the moment.
	I got a quick trip around some news headlines which are quite interesting.
	CDC study, that's the Centers for Disease Control, and they're doing important work here.
	This government-funded study says gay and bisexual high school students are more likely than their heterosexual classmates to smoke, use alcohol, or do other risky things.
	I think we should get him a vaccine against that gayness.
	Why?
	That story makes no logical sense.
	What?
	The conclusion of their study?
	Yeah.
	Well, they surveyed 156,000 high school students in the largest government survey ever.
	I'll take their word for it.
	It still seems sketchy.
	So if you're gay, you're bad.
	That's the message.
	Oh yeah, okay.
	Don't be gay.
	That makes sense.
	Anti-obesity vaccine reduces food consumption in animals, so can't wait for that.
	Looks like we're going to have a vaccine against eating.
	This is new.
	From Gitmo Nation, Ho Chi Minh City, one of our producers is in Vietnam and is on the NOA Gen The News Network, noagenthenewsnetwork.com.
	More than 2,000 children in Ho Chi Minh City have contracted hand-foot mouth disease in the past three months, which I think is very interesting because I... Well, there's an underreported story.
	Yeah, but I didn't think it was communicable to humans.
	I've lived in hand-foot-mouth territory in Belgium and in Gitmo Nation lowlands, and this is weird.
	2,100 children in Ho Chi Minh City have hand-foot-mouth disease.
	Double the number in the same period last year.
	They must have a problem.
	Looks like 11 children are really severely hurt.
	Ah, but there's good news, John.
	Are you consulting the Book of Knowledge about Ho Chi Minh City?
	Well, I'm actually consulting about hand, foot, and mouth disease in Medline, and it says it's...
	Relatively common infection.
	Usually begins in the throat.
	It's commonly caused by...
	Oh, Coxsackie is what it is.
	Oh, Coxsackie, yeah.
	Christina had that when she was a baby.
	Enterovirus family disease is not spread from pets, but it can be spread from person to person.
	You may catch it.
	This Coxsackie is what it is.
	Eleven children have died.
	You can die from it, but it's pretty rare.
	My daughter had Coxsackie when she was still in the crib.
	It was the scariest thing ever.
	It occurs mostly in children under 10, but can be seen in adolescents and occasionally adults.
	The outbreaks occur in the summer.
	This is not a major story.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Well, I thought it was interesting.
	Yeah, it sounds interesting, but it's not.
	Here's the real one, John.
	This is good news.
	We'll have a brain scan that can predict Alzheimer's disease a decade in advance.
	Yeah, this sounds like bullcrap to me.
	Of course it's bullcrap.
	We've been warning about this.
	It's been subjugated a little bit because of some guy's penis.
	But the pharmaceutical industry is all over this Alzheimer's.
	They've had all kinds of promotional spots in the form of CNN specials, etc.
	They're working on vaccines, and now we have a brain scan.
	What does a typical scan cost?
	It's like $5,000, $6,000, $7,000?
	About $3,500.
	Okay.
	Oh, you got a bargain, apparently.
	And then this one, this is nuts.
	The Attorney General in Gitmo Nation East has rejected calls for an inquest into the death of Dr.
	David Kelly.
	This is the guy who killed himself with a potato knife, I think.
	We had helicopters landing on the field.
	There were no footprints.
	There was no blood anywhere.
	No, there's no evidence to support claims he was murdered.
	Actually, I see there's video.
	I didn't realize there was video.
	Let's see what the video says.
	It might be interesting.
	It's from the BBC. It's a download from the BBC. And I just see a spinning red light.
	Mr.
	Dominic Grieve.
	Please speak.
	House of Commons.
	Mr.
	Speaker, with permission, I'd like to make a statement about the death of Dr.
	David Kelly and whether an application should be made by me to the High Court for an inquest to be held into his death.
	Mr.
	Speaker, as a Law Officer of the Crown, I'm routinely asked to consider such applications as part of my public interest role.
	It's in that role that I make this statement today.
	I wouldn't normally present the result of my considerations so publicly, but given the interest in this case is attracted, both from members of the House and in the media, I think it's right that this House has the chance to consider my conclusions and to ask any questions.
	The House will be aware Dr.
	Kelly was a distinguished government scientist who became one of the chief weapons inspectors in Iraq.
	It turns out it's 34 minutes.
	I should have previewed it.
	For a minute.
	I will watch that.
	It's just hilarious.
	So this guy was clearly murdered because he was a weapons inspector.
	Yeah, he blew the whistle on the yellow cake scam.
	They've closed his files for 75 years.
	Well, what do you expect?
	I mean, for God's sake, they should have done this long ago.
	But where's the outrage?
	Where's the whistling?
	What outrage?
	We can't even get anyone outraged about the Department of Education having a SWAT team at their disposal.
	Yeah.
	Ah, John, you know what?
	I love talking to you, my friend.
	It's always fun.
	Well, we should make it before we go all the way out.
	We have to decide yes or no.
	I'm going to start doing like a pool.
	Yes or no, will there be a new distraction of the week?
	Will Wiener get bumped off the front page for something else that by Thursday, not Sunday, but by Thursday, we say, oh, look at that.
	And it'll be some news thing that's just bubbling up.
	It's, you know, this kind of information.
	Yes, I'll take yes.
	Yes, I say E. coli in America.
	Well, you're actually making the prediction of what it's going to be.
	Yeah, I'm pulling out all the stops.
	I don't mess around here.
	E. coli in America.
	I'll take E. coli in America.
	For 20.
	What?
	I'll take E. coli for 20.
	I believe Mr.
	Oil is going live after the show.
	I'm not sure.
	I don't have an Oil's Crude show, so we'll see if the stream gets taken over.
	I'm going to predict, by the way, I'm going to predict it's going to be something we've not heard.
	It'll be something totally new.
	Okay.
	Well, we'll find out on Sunday, won't we?
	No, Thursday of next week.
	Oh, Thursday of next week.
	Well, Sunday we might know, too.
	Coming to you from the Crackpot Command Center in the Hilltop Watchtower, Gitmo Nation, West Peoples, Republic of Southern California.
	In the morning, everybody.
	I am the lone wolf known as Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley, where I'm on the lookout for the Department of Education SWAT team, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We'll talk to you again on Sunday right here on No Agenda.

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