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Feb. 28, 2024 - The Matt Walsh Show

13:02

POV: Matt Walsh Reacts To Women's Favorite IG Reels

Windshield WOW - Exclusive Discount for my Listeners! Use promo code WALSH at checkout. http://www.WindshieldWOW.com Matt Walsh reacts to viral Instagram reels.

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	Okay, today we're going to take a look at some marriage videos, and usually what we'll end up doing is we'll watch videos of people giving relationship advice, and I'll explain why the advice is terrible, but this is a little bit different.
	In this case, my producers have queued up some videos that deal with some of the idiosyncrasies and minutiae of married life.
	Cousin Delroy is getting married!
	To a man!
	And we'll watch it, and you know, we'll have a little chuckle.
	We'll have fun together.
	We'll have a little chuckle together.
	So come along on this journey and let's watch the first video.
	Hey!
	Hi!
	Welcome!
	You didn't dust your baseboard?
	There's actual trash in your trash can.
	Are you Neanderthals?
	When's the last time you vacuumed?
	Do you even care about us?
	One throw pillow?
	Are you a monster?
	One candle for this whole room?
	No wonder it smells like a barn.
	Unorganized.
	Unorganized.
	It's true.
	That's very true.
	I mean, here's the thing your wife will do.
	She'll invite, because we didn't get the prequel to that, which is that the wife invites the guest over to the house and then is frantically cleaning the house.
	A company is coming to get rid of the couches!
	We can't let people know we sat!
	In all of these very specific ways, because the guest is coming, and then she'll start to get annoyed through the cleaning process that the guest is coming.
	And so then she'll start complaining that the guest is coming, and then while she's cleaning, and then she's like, well, you have these people coming over and the house is a mess.
	And then what you'll do is you'll say something really helpful.
	You'll say, well, you invited them, so...
	And then she will inform you that that comment was not helpful, it did not contribute to the situation at all, and that's usually the way it goes.
	But it's an important point, because look, I get around this problem by not ever inviting anyone over to the house.
	Bingo.
	Red flag.
	I need to be cautious about this.
	So I don't, I just never do that.
	I don't have to worry about, the house doesn't have to be presentable.
	I, it's never my fault that the house needs to look presentable.
	Because if it was up to me, no one would ever step foot in a house who is not a blood relation, and not just that, but like a, but directly, like an immediate member of the nuclear family.
	No one else would ever come in because it's just not worth the hassle.
	So that's my general view on it.
	But my wife does, you know, she invites them and then of course the house has to look like it has to look like a catalog.
	You know what the house has to look like?
	It has to look like the interior of a house in a prescription drug commercial.
	So imagine a middle-aged woman in her living room and in a prescription drug commercial and there's the VO is talking about irritable bowel syndrome or something.
	That is what the house has to look like.
	It's very sanitized, Everything is white and all of that.
	Up to 20% of the population suffers from an irritable bowel.
	And I remember the last time we had guests over, with family coming over.
	And my wife was organizing, what was it?
	She was organizing the closet in the laundry room.
	And she'd already cleaned everything else.
	And then she went, I got to clean, I got to organize the closet in the laundry room.
	And I said, no, you don't.
	You don't have to organize that.
	That's not a thing that has to happen at all because they're not, why would they be in the closet in the laundry room?
	And if they did, that's their problem.
	I mean, if we had that, if the whole closet was just full, it was like a cartoon and it was, and if you opened it, all of the items would fall out on you.
	If it was that bad and they opened it, it's their fault.
	So we don't have to worry about it.
	That was my argument anyway.
	But we have a lot of these videos, so let's just keep going.
	John, John, John, look.
	Look at that dog.
	He's such an angel.
	Are you looking?
	Oh, he's cute.
	I see him.
	Stop not looking at him and look at him.
	Oh, he's so cute.
	I love him.
	I don't even know him.
	I love him so much.
	I see, yeah.
	You're not looking.
	What?
	You keep saying you're looking and you keep looking away.
	Look.
	He's literally just sitting there.
	He's so cute.
	That is a basic dog.
	Do you love him?
	No, I don't know him.
	You should love him.
	We have our own dog.
	I think we should take him.
	That would be illegal.
	I just hope he's happy.
	Yeah, this one I can't relate to at all, personally.
	I mean, I don't doubt that women behave this way.
	And I also don't doubt that my wife would do this, but she's, you know, she's married to me, so she's not gonna try to enlist.
	There are limits, and she's not gonna try to enlist me.
	Maybe she did that once when we were first dating.
	Look at the cute dog!
	She might have done that once.
	Like 13 years ago?
	But ever since then, there's no point.
	It's hopeless.
	So, she probably is freaking out in her head about cute dogs all the time, but she never even bothers trying to bring me on board, which is probably for the best.
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	outro People are so good at sending memes.
	That was amazing.
	I've got to send this to everyone I know.
	This makes me love her more.
	I don't know how I'm going to carry on with my day now.
	That's so funny.
	That's a slice of life right there.
	I mean, dead on accurate, obviously.
	Now, what it's missing, at least in my case, is that oftentimes, when the wife texts the meme or the video, that's one thing.
	Because you can just ignore it.
	But in my case, what will often happen is that it will be presented to me in person.
	So, because I actually live with my wife.
	I don't know if you realize that.
	So, she'll come in and say, Oh, you gotta see this video.
	This one you have to see.
	And I'll say, I don't think I do have to see it.
	I'm pretty sure I don't have to see it at all.
	And then, but I'll be made to sit and watch the meme or whatever.
	Look at the meme.
	That's one thing, but usually it's a video.
	It's like a TikTok or an Instagram thing.
	And, uh, and then the great part is that she's showing me the video and then watching me watch it.
	To see if I react that way, which I never do, ever, in the history of our marriage.
	I never have once.
	But she keeps trying.
	She's relentless, you know?
	You gotta stick with it.
	She's gonna find that one Instagram video that makes me crack up hysterically and she's gone through...
	You know, we've probably watched, uh, four- I think we're at 46,000 of them now at this point, and it hasn't happened, but she keeps- she keeps trying.
	Some of these things are long.
	The other day she came in, and it was a video of- it was an Instagram video of a guy, like, reacting to weird Craigslist ads or something.
	And I swear to you, this video was 95 minutes long.
	It just- it took up the whole night, was just watching this one video.
	And it was slightly amusing, but that's it.
	The other thing too is it doesn't matter What you're in the middle of doing, you know, it says I could be putting out a grease fire in the kitchen and I'll be in the middle of doing that and she'll come in.
	You got to see this video.
	Just it's okay.
	Can you just watch this video real quick?
	But what's missing is that is that the wife will react to memes and videos basically like that.
	She'll react as the first scenario is actually how women will react to like a video.
	They think it's funny.
	I've seen my wife.
	She someone sends her a video and I send her videos to that are actually funny.
	Got it!
	And if she likes it, I have seen her actually get on the phone and call multiple people to tell them about this funny video she just saw.
	So, in this case, I think it's women, to their credit, who are... It's not like they're asking something from us in this case that they don't do themselves.
	It's just that men and women are different.
	That's the problem.
	Let's go to the next one.
	[swoosh]
	[swoosh]
	Now, you know what? But that- (swoosh)
	Now you know what but that Why are you with your wife while she's shopping for anything home decor related in the first place?
	I mean, that's your first problem.
	That's your first mistake.
	Because here's what's also gonna happen.
	If you're there...
	Right, then she will discard your opinion, of course, but she'll still ask for it.
	So that's the game.
	We can never figure it out.
	As men, we don't know, why are you asking my opinion?
	For our opinion on many different home decor related things, it's just that it never matters what the opinion actually is, but they will get it and they want the opinion.
	I don't know why they want it.
	I haven't been able to figure that out.
	So if you're with your wife and you're at the store and you're buying some home decor related thing, you're shopping for a lamp or a bedside table.
	Uh, bedside tables in particular are big commitments I've discovered.
	Every time we move, we end up not having bedside tables for at least a year because my wife has to take, she takes a long time to figure out, she just needs to kind of like soak in the essence of the room before she commits to one particular style of bedside table.
	But the thing is, if you are at the store, she'll go, uh, do you like this one?
	And you'll go, yeah, it's fine.
	It's fine.
	Yeah, I really like that one's great.
	Let's do that one.
	And then she'll say, no, it's hideous.
	And you'll say, oh, I didn't realize this was a pop quiz.
	I thought you were actually asking for my opinion, but apparently my opinion can be wrong.
	And it always is.
	Okay, let's go to the next one.
	What did you do?
	I have to say I'm so happy that I saw that video because I... I honestly didn't know that this was a universal thing.
	I didn't realize... I didn't even realize this was a man-woman thing.
	I thought that... I thought I was the only one.
	I thought I was alone in the universe dealing with this issue.
	Apparently it's an epidemic.
	All wives do this.
	I didn't realize that.
	I really didn't.
	It's not just mine, but all wives think that garbage cans are like bottomless pits.
	They treat the garbage can like it's... What's that thing in... What's the thing in Star Wars?
	The giant pit that you throw people?
	What is it called?
	The Sarlacc, I think?
	So they treat the trashcan like a sarlacc.
	I might be totally botching this analogy.
	It's like this bottomless pit that can consume anything, and they'll just keep putting things in it no matter how much is already in the trashcan.
	They'll keep on doing it indefinitely.
	Here's the one twist, though, in my particular case.
	What my wife will do, and I don't know if this is a universal thing or not.
	I'll be interested to find out.
	She will get to a point where she's like, okay, that's too much stuff in the garbage can.
	So then she'll tie the bag, you know.
	It's like, okay, the bag's had enough.
	Let's tie the bag off.
	But she'll tie the bag off so that we can't put anything else in it.
	And then leave it.
	Leave it in the can.
	So now we have a tied bag in the can that's just sitting there.
	So the next time someone comes along and they wanna put something in the garbage can,
	they can't 'cause the bag's tied off and then so then it's you.
	Because you know, women, they don't, taking the trash out,
	I guess it's just one of those things.
	They are absolutely determined not to do it, which is fine.
	And I have to say that all of these videos were quite relatable, at least most of them.
	And it was nice to do one of these where I'm not complaining about the videos the entire time.
	That was nice.
	Instead, I'm complaining about my wife.
	But not really.
	Not really complaining.
	Because you know what?
	You know what this all boils down to is that men and women are different.
	And it's a beautiful thing.
	It really is.
	I'm quite glad that women are different.
	Because otherwise, they would just be men.
	And I'd be married to a man.
	That would be gay.
	So... Anyway.

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