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| There have been more funny moments in, like, death row execution chambers over the last 20 years than in SNL skits. | |
| For our next edition of Try to Laugh, we are going to try to harpoon the great white whale. | |
| This is the Moby Dick of unfunny woke garbage. | |
| We've tried and failed to laugh at jokes told by feminist comedians many times, but this is a little bit different. | |
| This, I think, is a greater challenge. | |
| This time we're going to try to laugh at Saturday Night Live. | |
| No! | |
| The modern, current version of it. | |
| What I have to say right now might be a little cringe. | |
| Now, as you know, SNL has not been funny. | |
| For about 20 years, and that's probably being generous, Samantha Bee has told more funny jokes in the last two decades than SNL has. | |
| Yeah, they're landing on my face now. | |
| That might be going a little too far. | |
| Put it this way. | |
| There have been more funny moments in, like, death row execution chambers over the last 20 years than in SNL skits. | |
| First time. | |
| I have no idea how it manages to stay on the air except that it comes on at night and everyone's either asleep or drunk when it comes on late on a Saturday night. | |
| So I think maybe no one's, like, noticed how bad it's gotten. | |
| It's allowed to just linger on, lifeless, half-dead, dried up, shriveled, confused. | |
| There's an obvious Joe Biden joke here, but I'm trying to think of another analogy. | |
| I can't, so, yeah, like Joe Biden. | |
| We're gonna look at the most recent season, which is now mercifully over. | |
| And we'll check some of the skits to see if we can find something, anything worthy of even a modest chuckle. | |
| That's where I'm setting the bar. | |
| Not even laugh. | |
| It's like, this is a try to chuckle thing. | |
| We'll start with this skit titled, No More Masks. | |
| And now, a message from Dr. Anthony Fauci. | |
| [applause] | |
| It's your boy, Fauci, the patron saint of Purell. | |
| As you probably heard, we got some very good news this week, and I'm not just talking about J. Lo and Ben Affleck. | |
| The CDC announced that people who are vaccinated no longer need to wear masks outdoors or indoors. | |
| Pretty great, right? | |
| This is Kate McKinnon, right? | |
| Why is she the resident impressionist over at SNL? | |
| Some things should work, but do they? | |
| Isn't an impressionist supposed to, you know, be Good at impressions. | |
| I always say life is like a box of chocolates. | |
| Dude, you have what it takes. | |
| That guy legislates from the bench, but he measures from the balls. | |
| Isn't that what you want out of an impressionist? | |
| Yeah. | |
| Um, no. | |
| I don't know. | |
| Hers are all terrible. | |
| Kate McKinnon is about as witty and funny as, like, your drunk aunt at Thanksgiving. | |
| That one didn't count. | |
| Anyway, the point is, she's not very funny. | |
| We're going to give this a chance, because there should be a lot of potential here to make some funny jokes and have a funny skit. | |
| So we'll keep watching. | |
| A lot of people had questions, such as, what does that mean? | |
| What the hell are you talking about? | |
| Is this a trap? | |
| So, to clear things up, I found a few doctors at the CDC who minored in theater, and I asked them to reenact various scenarios in order to demonstrate correct mask behavior. | |
| And remember, they only had 24 hours to put this little show together, | |
| so please welcome the CDC players and their first scene, "Man Walks Into a Bar." | |
| [ Cheers and applause ] | |
| -Whoo! | |
| -Welcome to a bar. | |
| Thank you. | |
| Do I still have to wear a mask indoors? | |
| You actually do not. | |
| Great. | |
| Well, as long as you're vaccinated. | |
| No, I'm not. | |
| Oh, then that's bad. | |
| Well, I'm entering a bar at 11 a.m. | |
| Did you really think I was vaxxed? | |
| Because that's on you. | |
| You're right. | |
| I deserve COVID. | |
| End scene. | |
| Just pausing to see if I can hear actual crickets. | |
| This is like the comedic stylings of Kamala Harris. | |
| No! | |
| This seems like the White House just gave them a PSA to perform as comedy. | |
| This is one of the problems for SNL. | |
| Is that comedy should be transgressive and countercultural and, you know, rebellious and kind of that's what it should be. | |
| And yes, offensive. | |
| I mean, comedy should be all of those things. | |
| And SNL is not that. | |
| SNL is now a mouthpiece for the elites, for the government. | |
| But let's move on to another sketch. | |
| And here we go. | |
| If you watched The Undoing, you might have noticed that one of the stars of the show, | |
| Nicole Kidman, sang the theme song. | |
| While I'm alone it's clear as can be, my son, dream a little dream of me. | |
| Did you notice my coat? | |
| We did. | |
| Inspired by Nicole, stars of your other favorite shows are now singing their theme songs on... Now that's what I call theme songs sung by the stars of the show. | |
| So enjoy this original theme song that was cut from the opening of Queen's Gambit. | |
| Chess and drugs and drugs and chess. | |
| Girl playing chess, then doing drugs, then playing chess. | |
| Now when you see people playing chess, you'll know that they're on drugs. | |
| Hey, if you like Stranger Things, you'll love the new Season 4 opening credits, performed by Sheriff Jim Hophopper. | |
| Welcome to the 80s, I'm about to blow your mind. | |
| In Hawkins, Indiana, scary aliens you'll find. | |
| Lots of good actors, but they're actually good. | |
| There's something strange in your neighborhood. | |
| This script was written 15 minutes before showtime, right? | |
| It had to be. | |
| Well, do it live! | |
| F*** it! | |
| Probably by the janitor or someone. | |
| They have a team of writers, right? | |
| A team of writers. | |
| Came up with this and they all said it was good? | |
| And it made its way through a purposeful process onto the air? | |
| Did hackers, like, hack into the SNL broadcast and pipe this skit in to embarrass the show? | |
| I'm just trying to figure it out because this is bad. | |
| We'll try something that seems... Okay, I have no idea what this is. | |
| This is a skit called The Uli Show. | |
| Don't know what it is. | |
| Wild card. | |
| Let's try it. | |
| You're watching Icelandic Public Television. | |
| Pop culture. | |
| Pops. | |
| Celebrities. | |
| Games. | |
| Candy. | |
| It's the Uli Show! | |
| And now, let's meet host, Iceland's number one social media star, Uli! | |
| Hello, and welcome to the Uli Show! | |
| Pretty cool! | |
| I'm Uli, and this is my side-guy, Bjørn. | |
| We have big show today, Uli! | |
| So cool! | |
| Iceland's number one comedy duo is here, Thorbjørn and Greta! | |
| Ha ha ha! | |
| Hilarious! | |
| So, you have a good weekend, Paul? | |
| Yes, I visited my elf shrine, Uli. | |
| I can't continue with that. | |
| Is this a recurring bit they do? | |
| Is there some context I'm missing, maybe? | |
| Context like LSD? | |
| Maybe that's the context in which I need to be viewing this particular skit. | |
| So it seems that the SNL kind of fluctuates between banal, politically correct tripe, and then stuff that's weird, but forgets that weird in and of itself isn't funny. | |
| You have to be funny as well as weird. | |
| You still have to make jokes within the weirdness. | |
| But you know what? | |
| I want to be fair. | |
| I'm gonna really give them a chance. | |
| Because I see that they did a bit on gay pride. | |
| So they have a skit on gay pride. | |
| We're in gay pride month. | |
| As I'm sure you're aware. | |
| You could not be aware that we're in gay pride month. | |
| Because every time you leave your house, you're beat over the head with it by 2x4s. | |
| Here's a chance for some topical and really edgy humor. | |
| about gay pride. | |
| Does SNL have the balls, so to speak, to make jokes about gay pride, to actually satirize the concept? | |
| There's a lot to satirize, certainly. | |
| And we will not get my hopes up, but we'll see. | |
| Hey, all you she's, gays, and nays. | |
| It's the month of almost June. | |
| And you know what that means. | |
| Pride is around the corner. | |
| But last year, pride didn't happen. | |
| So now we're making up for lost time. | |
| Pride is a celebration. | |
| Yeah, that's what it's about. | |
| Last year, we couldn't meet up. | |
| But this time, it's allowed. | |
| With my queer friends and allies, now it's time to go out. | |
| We get to do it all again. | |
| Now we're out on the floor, but I don't see my crush. | |
| He's not texting me back. | |
| Well, I'll just brush it off. | |
| I have a mental breakdown. | |
| Make my friends take care of me. | |
| And I think, woo! | |
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's Pride again. | |
| We've been waiting so long. | |
| It's Pride again. | |
| For so much to go wrong. | |
| It's Pride again. | |
| Santa Con, but for queers. | |
| This is our St. | |
| Paddy's Day. | |
| Acting sloppy cause we're gay. | |
| Okay, so they made the bold choice to be not funny once again. | |
| So bold strategy, Cotton. | |
| By the way, I hope all the people in that sketch are actually gay, otherwise this would be appropriation, which is very offensive. | |
| I'm guessing they're probably safe as far as that goes. | |
| Out of all the funny and controversial things they could have done with a gay pride skit, this is what they do instead. | |
| I'm not even sure what the joke is supposed to be. | |
| All my queer friends and allies, That's hilarious! | |
| Yeah, that's not funny. | |
| It seems with every sketch, they kind of studiously examine all the potential places to take it, all of the possible directions, and then they choose the least funny one every time. | |
| It's kind of impressive, actually. | |
| They succeed in being mostly inoffensive, but they fail at being a comedy show, which is what their job is, I think. | |
| Or so the Germans would have us believe. | |
| The good news, though, is that you can put it on while you fall asleep and you don't have to worry about being kept awake by your own laughter. |