Important tour update: we are not on tour anymore This week we cover how over the weekend, the right wing pinned their hopes for a violent revolution on one drunk instagrammer who memed himself into a standoff with police and Pope Eliminates Pork from Banquet out of Respect for Muslims (via Breitbart . com) Support the show and get a bonus episode every week at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult Music: Lords - This Is Not A Song, Dumb Ass
Are the servers, um... Are the servers, both men and women, a tilted kilt?
I doubt it.
I think it's probably just women.
I'm assuming.
Um, you know.
Cause like... Women perverts don't go to restaurants.
Yeah, no, they don't like to eat food.
No, they don't eat food, so... I mean, they don't eat wings, at least.
I think it's a shame it's just another sign of, like, women stealing something, the kilt, that was meant for men.
It's true, it's true.
That's just kilt appropriation.
Like, to go to a tilted kilt restaurant where all these women are being, like, harassed and exploited and being mad at the fact that they're wearing a men's article of clothing?
Yeah, it's really just insulting to men.
Yeah, just another thing we can't have for ourselves.
True.
They just take everything.
Sons of bitches.
I mean, that's what they want.
They want to be sons of bitches, you know.
We're the sons of bitches.
Oh, that's true.
They're the daughters of bitches.
Daughters of bitches sounds really like, it sounds way worse.
Yeah, it should be Daughters of Chaos.
Oh.
Because we learned from Jordan B. Peterson that chaos is the feminine energy.
It's the feminine side to the masculine order.
It's true.
Yeah.
I mean, have you seen how the tides work?
Daughters of Chaos would definitely be like the all-female reboot of Sons of Anarchy.
All their daughters start their own biker gang?
Yeah, and then all the fake dentist bikers are mad about it.
Get this politics off my dirtbag bikers TV show.
They're just riding sportsters.
Those are chick bikes.
The liberals are destroying California.
And conservative humor gone awry.
Conservative humor gone awry is going to fascistphonia today.
So stay tuned.
We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
Stay tuned guys, we'll show you exactly what it looks like when you're in the desert.
Follow their remarkable stuff.
Stay tuned.
I'm Alexander Edward.
And I'm Tony Boswell.
And we are Minion Death Cult.
The world is ending.
The Pope is responsible.
We're documenting it.
What's up everybody?
We are back from tour, baby!
Yes!
Good to be home.
I want to be, like, really energetic about us being done with tour, you know?
Like, how you're supposed to do that leading up to tour and, like, get people excited.
Hey, everybody!
Get a load of this.
We are done with tour!
Stay home and listen to us while we're not on tour.
We are still in your headphones and your cars, but we are not on tour.
Coming at you from our living rooms.
From your living rooms.
Yeah.
This is a living room show now, folks.
Yeah, we're back from tour.
It was a lot of fun.
Thanks again to Street Fight for having us on.
Shout out to the person at the Che Cafe who had a That Awful Sound Minion Death Cult Street Fight crossover question.
Yeah, that was perfect.
That was very fun.
That was very funny and, yeah, cool to hear.
That question, of course, was what's the best nu metal song.
I said Roots by Sepultura because it was about the slave trade.
It was specifically what song would be the new national anthem.
That's right.
And you picked that one, which was a great answer and ruined all of our stupid answers.
I really set the tone for that one.
Yours was actually thoughtful and made sense.
Mine was just what I thought would be funny.
Which was?
What was yours?
I think Break Stuff?
Break Stuff, yeah.
That's good.
I mean, that makes sense, you know, like throwing tea into the harbor, wealthy landowners protesting taxation, just breaking shit for no reason.
Yeah, exactly.
That makes sense.
Yeah, we're back from tour.
I'll admit it's going to be a little hard to settle back into the routine of, you know, not entertaining a room full of people in front of us, not having them scream our names, Alex, Tony, Minion Death Cult, woo.
Yeah.
I mean, I realize all of you at home are screaming our names still, but it's different when you can't hear it in the same room.
I've actually had to, like, I've taken a bunch of footage from Motley Crue DVDs.
of the crowd and I just have that playing in the background of my computer right now so I'm like it's what feels like I'm on stage again because that's similar to how our crowds were much like the raucous Motley Crue crowds of the 80s.
It was gratifying to see that our target audience was who actually showed up during the live shows which was a bunch of platinum blonde slash totally white haired men and women in their Late 60s, wearing those sort of fashionably cut up tank tops, bedazzled fashion jeans.
It was absolutely losing their minds.
It was difficult to sometimes talk over the sound of snapping bubblegum that was going on throughout the entire show.
But that was, but we got over that, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
So it was funny because right when I got back from tour, so I took a week and a day of vacation off in order to do this tour.
And the day I was supposed to come back from tour, come back to work, I got called in to serve my country on a jury.
Right?
The day after my vacation ended.
And so I was like, thank God for this, like, authentic piece of paper that I can show to my boss and prove to him that this, like, weird coincidence, I'm not making it up.
I have another day off from work.
Exactly the day when I get back from vacation.
And I just, I wanted to, I wanted to relay this story because it's funny and stupid and weird.
I get to jury duty and You know, it's a lot of waiting around.
It's a lot of not knowing whether or not you're gonna even make it into a, like, the jury selection process.
We finally get in there and the judge is giving her spiel about what a duty it is and how it's, you know, you're serving your country, which is great to hear.
You know, other people serve their countries besides the obvious ones.
And Halfway through her spiel, she says, okay, now I want you to, I want you to start applauding.
I want everybody to start clapping as loud as you can.
Clap, uh, clap like you're clapping for some, somebody you love, something you really enjoy.
And so I, I, my dumb ass, like she'd been going over the procedure and like how we're going to be doing the jury, the, the jury selection service and like, you know, all the technical details of this process.
And so I thought we were doing like an audio demonstration of how, How the acoustics were in the courtroom, you know?
Like, you have to speak up or this is how the sound is going to reverberate or don't whisper because it carries through the chamber.
I love that you're like an audio nerd and you're like, yes, we must be testing the acoustics of the room before we proceed with justice.
Well, it's a weird thing to ask.
And so I was like, what is the reason for this?
And then when we were done clapping, she said, you just applauded for the American judicial system.
I fucking got you.
Yeah, I was like, oh cool.
Thanks, asshole.
Got me.
Isn't that like entrapment?
Isn't that like?
It is entrapment.
That's what I'm saying.
Like, it's complete entrapment.
I was pissed.
I was just like, S and my damn H.
Fucking got me.
Got me in a self-described leftist applauding the American judicial system.
I like to imagine that they really do get off on that every single time, like a fucking these goddamn suckers don't even know what they're in for right now.
Yeah, and it was, you know, it's just like, I'm not really like that paranoid, but now I have a new rule.
I'm never going to applaud if you don't know what you're applauding for.
Never applaud.
Good move.
I am more skeptical of that than I am of like the iTunes service agreement.
I will click that shit before I applaud blindly ever again.
You're gonna record your own version of that Tech N9ne song, but instead of, you know, like, assaulting your mom, you're just, like, clapping for the judicial system.
Okay, Immortal Technique?
Is that what you're talking about?
Yeah, yeah, Immortal Technique, yeah, yeah.
One of those, one of those fucking guys.
Yeah, yeah, in the end, it's revealed that you were actually clapping for Ameri-kay-kay-kay.
Yeah.
Dance, danced with the devil by applauding in a courtroom.
Yeah.
How'd you get the meme song wrong?
I don't know.
I don't think I'm allowed to like know those rappers that well.
I think it kind of goes against my whole thing, you know?
Yeah.
Yeah, I can't like know like Tech N9ne or Immoral.
They're the same to me.
Tech N9ne and Immoral Technique and Sage Francis are all the same person in my head.
And so another interesting thing that happened so I can talk about this now But the the case was about sexual or domestic violence and domestic abuse So like a lot of people when I posted about the applause thing a lot of people were like jury notification do jury Notification and I was like, well, this is like domestic abuse and it's not like I I mean, it is the state bringing charges against somebody, but maybe let's hear it out this time.
Yeah.
Maybe let's see what happened, basically.
And it was funny, there were, you know, they ask you, like, is there any reason that you feel like you might be unable to, like,
Decide or listen to this case in an unbiased way and More than a couple people said that they would not be able to hear the case in an unbiased way because they believe victims of domestic abuse too damn much I'm not joking Could you imagine like how do they how would you formulate saying that
Well, I don't know.
I just believe him too much.
This guy has no chance.
They don't stand a chance against me believing them regardless.
I'd love to serve, but I'm just too much of an ally.
Too good of an ally to decide in favor of a domestic abuse victim.
And that whole logic is saying that, you know, You might accidentally believe a liar?
Is what that logic is saying.
It's just, I don't want to undermine the judicial system by ruling in favor of a victim of domestic violence.
Because people will see that and they'll know something's up.
If, like, we get justice for this person... They'll know.
They'll know someone's fishy there.
They'll know we cheated.
Yeah.
Um, yeah, yeah.
Juror 22.
There's not that many jurors, but I see you have a tweet from 2016.
Hashtagged me too.
You can no longer participate in this jury.
You've been dismissed.
Yeah.
Yeah, just like performatively woking yourself out of actually helping someone.
Yeah, exactly.
I just, yeah, I thought that was incredible.
One woman was a lawyer who did like, she said she did seven years maybe in like civil and criminal courts and became a corporate lawyer because she could no longer stomach the injustices that were being done to people of color.
Oh my god!
Oh my god!
But like, not like in corporate law, where like, oh my god!
Just totally missing the spot here.
Well, not only that, not only like how disgusting corporate law is, I mean, you know, although that's like corporations warring among themselves a lot of the time, but yeah, not only that, but just like, god, I saw how fucked up it was for people of color in criminal court, so I just had to remove myself from that situation.
I couldn't handle it!
I couldn't help him out!
I couldn't stomach being around such state violence, you know?
That's wild.
That's wild.
Yeah, rather than help him out, I just had to go.
I just had to leave.
I was uncomfortable.
Yeah, so that was really... because this is Seattle, so this is like where everyone is super fucking woke.
So woke to the point that they couldn't possibly actually materially help somebody.
Like I said, when I've been in Seattle, you literally see more Black Lives Matter signs than you see actual black people.
Yeah.
And I was down.
I was down to serve because I thought, A, I'll hear what's going on with this case, and B, I'll get out of work during peak season, which I think would be really funny.
That would be perfect.
It would be cool that I wouldn't have to work during peak season.
I would very much enjoy that, but I think it would also be very funny.
And you could like tell them, oh I'd really love to come in, but I gotta, you know, justice has to be served and I have to be part of that process.
Yeah.
Listen, I'd love to help line your and Jeff Bezos' pockets, but I can't.
I can't do it.
Yeah.
So I just, I thought that that was a funny experience from jury duty.
That's pretty wonderful.
I didn't get picked.
Did not get picked.
It's almost unbelievable, but I do believe it.
I don't know what did it.
I don't know why I didn't get picked.
I think that you just have that look of a person that just believes women too much.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think so.
They were like, he doesn't want to have to put himself in a spot where he actually has to help a woman.
He might be considered biased.
Yeah.
That's wild.
That's poetic.
Yeah.
I did a couple grandstanding things, though.
Like, one of the questions was, like, do you believe that if the accused doesn't take the stand in their own defense that you deserve an explanation or that something is, like, suspicious about the accused not testifying on their own behalf?
And a couple people were like, well, yeah, I think I think that'd be weird if like why, you know, if you were innocent, why wouldn't you like defend yourself and this, that and the other?
And so I was like, no, nobody has nobody should have to incriminate themselves.
Everybody has the Fifth Amendment.
You don't you don't need an excuse to.
To, uh, use the Fifth Amendment and it's still up to the state to prove your guilt.
Otherwise, you know, and then a couple people were like, yeah, man.
Yeah.
And like, they all started clapping for me.
And then I was like, see, I'll clap for myself.
I will not clap for the judicial system though.
This applause is okay.
And then you stood up and clapped for yourself.
Yeah.
Well, cause I knew what I was clapping for.
And that's probably why they had you leave.
Yeah, that's probably right.
I thought it was just a clapping kind of courtroom, you know?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's get on to today's episode.
Oh, we got a couple contest winners, don't we, Tony?
Yeah, we sure do.
The Patreon selection for the Patreon giveaway for the four amazing coins.
Four amazing zero-cents coins featuring... Worth absolutely nothing.
Four politicians that make zero cents, except for the money they make off our tax dollars.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
So we did pick four Patreon subscribers at random.
I'm gonna go ahead and let you know who that is right now.
If you hear your name, please reach out to us with your info.
Let us know where to send these coins.
Yeah, if we don't have your address in the Patreon system, you're not getting your damn coin.
So message us on any of the social media we talk about every fucking week.
Cool, so the winners are... John Bronson.
Kirsten Ward, Lance Seattle, and Jay Hinn.
Holy shit.
Those are some some older names in there.
Some older names I recognize.
Congratulations, folks.
Yeah, it looks like some OG's won, which is awesome.
Yeah, so please reach out to us.
Let us know where to send those coins.
And you will be getting that worthless, beautiful coin in your mailbox soon.
Also, we have re-upped on stickers.
Sticker packs will be going out ASAP.
Sorry about the delay.
Really appreciate the patience.
I promise they're all coming.
They will be, hopefully, arriving in the next couple weeks.
You don't have to apologize.
Our asses were on tour.
Our asses were out of the state.
True, true, true, true, true.
Yeah, so never mind.
Fuck off.
They're coming when they're coming.
Deal with it.
We do have to apologize for how beautiful those coins are, because you mentioned that they're beautiful coins, and that's true, but they were not supposed to be beautiful coins.
They were supposed to be as blemished and tarnished as the souls of the Democratic representatives they bore.
Which, you know, in some of the cases is accurate because they are perfectly minted coins.
They're beautiful and shiny, just like Bernie.
Yeah, just like Bernie who has no flaws, never been critical of Bernie.
Just like Bernie's forehead that is smooth and unwrinkled.
Yeah, maybe they went forward in time and got smooth Bernie to pose for the coin.
Yeah, okay.
So, we weren't planning on talking about this, but something came up last night that we gotta talk about because it's just right in the wheelhouse of this show.
We're talking about Alexander Booth and his standoff with the cops in New York City.
This is the Instagram guy, whiskey underscore warrior underscore 556.
Who was posting stories to Instagram about how he wasn't going to surrender to the cops unless they promised him he wouldn't go to jail.
This screenshot I have here is like him wearing a plate carrier with like a knife sheath in it.
And the caption says, I told the negotiator get me something in writing that I won't do jail time or there will be blood.
And I saw this like completely divorced from context.
This was like the first thing I saw from it.
Um, and I just think that that's a funny thing to say to cops.
You know, hey, promise me I'm not in trouble or I'm going to kill somebody.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's some good logic there.
I really like it.
The confidence of a whiskey warrior is something I'll never understand.
Yeah, um, and so, like, Right Wing Millennial slash Xer slash Zoomer Facebook, uh, went crazy over this guy, uh, because Right Wing Millennial, Xer, and Zoomer Facebook is crazy.
Yes.
Uh, they're extraordinarily bloodthirsty.
Something we don't really cover a lot on this show, mostly just because it's, like, less funny than when, uh, your grandpa does it.
Yeah, it's more of a bummer than we like to do.
Yeah.
Um, it's like genuinely scary.
Uh, so this guy was posting stories and videos of himself, uh, pretty drunk, hanging out in his attic while the cops were on his street.
For the record, I have no firearms on me whatsoever.
Magazines?
Empty.
Hashtag, HSGI, Taco, Bugalow, Redcoats.
Fuck off.
I've got the high ground.
Don't underestimate my power.
Red coats.
This is by the scenes action.
Mildly autistic, because, as my handle says, Whiskey Warrior, which And... And, like, just to illustrate, like, why this went viral, you know, a bunch of right-wing pages were posting about the Whiskey Warrior and how epic he was, uh, and how he probably smokes, like, really big cigars, and, like, he probably has those whiskey rocks, uh, for his whiskey that you get.
They're engraved.
Engraved whiskey rocks.
They're engraved whiskey rocks, but they're just engraved with, like, testicle wrinkles.
Yeah, so they're like his stones.
He calls them his stones, yeah.
They're big, too.
They're not like the small stones.
No, no, these are big ones.
They're heavy.
Yeah.
Just to illustrate, like, what was going on in the mind of the right-wing, uh, you know, right-wing Facebook provocateur cohort, Brent Vanderhoof comments about this whole ordeal.
Please start something.
It's so wild.
Like, they want it.
They want to fucking bring it.
They want this shit.
Think unpeaceful thoughts.
Think unpeaceful thoughts.
Yeah, um, this is what they were going crazy for.
They were like, oh, this is now.
Now the time of blood is now.
Let's do it, folks.
And so, I'm going to try to explain this as quickly and efficiently as possible.
A bunch of Twitter accounts got a hold of this story, a bunch of Facebook accounts got a hold of this story, and people just started going to this guy because the guy posted his address on here, on his story as well.
I'm gonna play some audio.
The story evolves from him saying that they were trying to get at him at work, and so he ran away to his house, and they were trying to get at him at work based on, quote, hearsay.
So this is just like the haters, you know, like the haters were talking shit and the cops heard about it and that's why they wanted to come talk to him and arrest him.
It's just hearsay.
The cops are all, we're on the street, we need to be coming for you.
Another thing he said was that it was because his mags were too big.
Right?
My mags are just too dang big, baby.
They've heard about my big mags and they're coming for me.
That's why I can't wear a condom.
It's just too big.
30 round mags.
They're illegal in New York City.
Maybe they are.
I don't know.
People were interpreting this as like a red flag.
Law violation that the cops were coming to do like a no-knock raid on him for having 30 round mags.
Yeah Brad Brown, however Says I read an article that said they were there to speak to him over a domestic incident that happened earlier in the day What bullshit is this?
So I like this comment because It came out at the end that yes, that's why the cops were there to speak to him.
That's like at least what's in the newspapers.
That's what the official story is.
That there was a domestic dispute, a domestic occurrence between him and his wife.
And he was also wanted for like breaking and entering, trespassing, that sort of thing.
Now...
He said that it was because his mags were too big and so that's why like I don't know I I did I don't know the exact number but a number of quote patriots who had nothing better to do on a Saturday night drove out to try and like stop the cops from taking his mags away.
Well I I love this I love this like mentality This person wanted to somehow deflect that he was being questioned or targeted because of domestic issues and would rather be seen as a domestic terrorist.
Totally.
No, no, no.
It's not that I had a conflict with my wife.
It's that they clearly know that I'm armed and ready.
Yeah, and I mean, that's like a, I don't know, an excuse or an explanation that's tailor-made for his audience.
Totally, totally.
I mean, because in this case, you can say he has the guns for his wife.
Like, I have to have them to protect her.
Well, I was going to say, they would say, of course this bitch was lying just to get him in trouble.
Like, that's what the response was.
It's either the cops are lying, a domestic dispute literally never happens.
That's literally never happened before, especially not with, like, a returning Iraq war veteran.
Yeah, no way.
And even if she did say that, well, she was obviously lying.
Yeah, but I like this comment.
I read an article that said they were there to speak with him over a domestic incident that happened earlier in the day.
What bullshit is this?
So, like, you've seen, like, the memes, right?
You've seen all the memes about how this is over a 30-round magazine, and you've seen all the posts about how this is over a 30-round magazine, but then you read a frickin' article that, like, tries to convince you that it was over a domestic incident?
What kind of bullshit are they trying here with this shit?
Yeah, what are they trying to do here?
This is clearly about the mags.
I read several Instagram stories from whiskey and beer lover America that this was over the 30 round mags.
What kind of bullshit is this article?
I don't give a fuck what the police report says.
I mean, I wouldn't give a shit what the police report says either.
No.
But the difference is like, if they are doing a seizure of your weapons, they're not going to lie about that.
No.
They don't have to make something up to do that.
No, that's almost more reasonable to these people.
Like, the reason that's a law on the books is so they don't have to fabricate a domestic incident in order to come to your house and take your weapons.
They don't have to have an excuse for that.
Like, I'm not a fan of red flag laws as we've discussed on this show, but the red flag laws exist so they don't have to come up with a weird convoluted excuse.
Let's see, where to go now from here?
So, one of the accounts that I was following Called the Pigeon.
This is like where I first saw it.
I don't know what this fucking account is.
Um, they were posting about it and uh... They posted eventually that he was taken into custody.
Peacefully.
Cause that's what happened.
I guess we should say what actually happened.
Dude is reported at least to have been taken into custody.
He finally surrendered.
Um, he said he wanted to surrender this whole time.
I mean, not this whole time.
Toward the end, he said he wanted to surrender peacefully or whatever.
But the whole time, like, he became a hero for these people.
He became a hero because he was, like, doing the whole epic come and get me redcoats thing on his Instagram.
He was very drunk.
He was drinking whiskey the whole time.
He was, like, cheersing the front-facing camera with his... with his, uh, Yeti thermos of whiskey.
Yes.
Yes.
I like how he was like, I can't be missed no more.
It's time for the Whiskey Warrior to do his Whiskey Warrior thing.
Yeah.
And I can understand why he would just want to be a meme.
You're all fucked up from going overseas and killing people who didn't deserve it.
And just being part of the meat in the meat grinder that is the Military Industrial Complex.
and you come back and you're like looking for I don't know some reason to live and and like now tens of thousands of people are following you and calling you epic and like you know George Washington or so you're you're like you're like George Washington if uh he was on the xbox or whatever well it's like you know some people clout chase and sometimes the clout just comes to you and you have to grab it right then and there Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
Guy didn't even apparently have any weapons on him, or at least he said he didn't have any weapons on him.
The reporting on it says that they didn't confiscate any weapons.
I don't know if that means they didn't find any weapons or if they just didn't confiscate them because they were legally owned or whatever.
Anyway.
I wish I could have been there the moment he decided it made sense to put on the flak jacket.
He's probably already wearing the flak jacket.
He probably woke up that day.
He wears it all the time.
In the plate carrier.
Yeah.
Um, so... The Pigeon posted, oh, you know, whatever, like, I guess it's over.
I guess nothing actually happened.
Um, and somebody commented, oh yeah, then why are you deleting all your old posts?
Like, seven of your old posts have been deleted.
And, uh, a couple of those posts, they included a screenshot of a couple of the posts, and, uh... You alright there, buddy?
Sorry.
Sorry.
That's alright.
I will be.
You're not even puffing on the reefer.
What are you doing over there, dude?
Just choking on my own saliva, so I'm gonna die.
Do you get higher on the saliva if you cough?
Is it like weed?
Yeah, you gotta cough to get off.
It stretches out your lungs?
That way the saliva can get into more like nooks and crannies?
Gets you higher?
Is that the thought process there?
That makes sense.
Yeah, I think so.
That's what they say, because your lungs stretch out and the weed reaches a lung that wasn't normally touched by weed.
Dang, dude.
You're fuckin' stoned, bro.
I think I'm... Ah!
I'm almost there.
I just don't understand weed culture.
Alright.
Why would you want to cough?
How is that cool?
Um, it just makes the music sound better.
When you're done with it all.
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, if you can understand it through all that coughing, I guess.
Okay, so the screenshots this commenter included to like say, hey, The Pigeon, why are you deleting your old posts?
Are you compromised?
Have you been taken over by the FBI?
The old posts say, uh, one of them says... Doc!
I'm sorry.
Okay, I think it's because I'm drinking coffee and not water.
To help cleanse the throat.
Uh-huh.
I think we're through it though.
I think we're through it.
Okay.
So the pigeon, the pigeon is obviously infiltrated.
It appears that way.
It appears that way.
Birds aren't real, folks.
The pigeon is CIA surveillance.
The pigeon wrote, reports of shots fired in cemetery.
Which is like where some of the supporters were gathering.
They were gathering in the cemetery by this dude's house.
Uh, so reports of shots fired in the cemetery.
And then another one, uh, says, update, some users on 4chan are stating that the situation is definitely not over and chaos is still going on.
Some are stating that the police and the feds seized various social media accounts and posting fake information to calm down the population and discourage people from getting to the scene.
Most definitely not certain and confirmed.
I like that.
I like that last sentence.
I also like, imagine the feds posting fake information on the internet.
Who would do such a thing?
You have violated your terms of service with Facebook by posting fake information.
I like how local sheriffs have a PSYOP team ready to go.
Yeah.
I also like how you're like, no, the people on 4chan are saying that it's actually still total chaos and carnage, and the revolution is happening down there for sure, says some users on 4chan.
Yeah.
Now you got me coughing.
In your face.
In your face.
Yeah.
Um, yeah, so the pigeon deleted those posts.
Uh... And, yeah, somebody was like, what the fuck, bro?
This page is compromised.
Travis Rasmussen says, this page is compromised.
And I just love that, like... You deleted the old posts because they weren't real, you're saying.
But that makes me think that everything that it's still up isn't real, and the deleted stuff was real.
But either way, just give me that fake shit that you deleted.
Like, that's the stuff I want.
Also, if you already believe this stuff, then shouldn't you just be on 4chan anyways following it and not the pigeon?
Yeah, that's a good point.
That's interesting.
Fucking posers, man.
So, Richard Rigsby, in response to the whole, like, I guess the ordeal is over.
He got taken into custody.
Richard Rigsby says, video or it didn't happen.
So I need video to prove that he was taken into custody non-violently or else I'm going to continue to believe that there was a violent shootout between the FBI and dozens of patriots who drove in from out of state.
Yeah, and I mean, even if you go to the scene of the crime now, they could have cleaned that shit up.
You know, you can't trust anything.
I love how, like, um... I love how people become, like, dutifully critical of media when it's something they don't like.
You know what I mean?
Absolutely, yeah.
Then they gotta really investigate it.
Yeah, I'm not so sure about this whole, oh, it ended peacefully thing.
Yeah, because that doesn't happen.
I also like in their mind there's this epidemic of white men dying violently in standoffs with the police.
There's all this proof of this happening.
Yeah, well in their fantasies it does.
In their fantasies, Waco was two weeks ago.
Yeah, totally.
It's not like the FBI and the ATF learned from those experiences and have treated white terrorists with kid gloves ever since.
Yeah, absolutely.
Even with the Bundy Ranch standoff, only one guy died.
Despite the dozens of people who had guns pointed at Bureau of Land Management officers.
Yeah, yeah.
The Pigeon posted again, uh, this is turning into Schrodinger's Boogaloo.
So stupid.
It's very stupid.
I love it though.
Is he even in the attic?
I mean God E equals MC fucked It's so like a brainy thing It's like oh you know If we bring up Schrodinger's cat That makes it sound smart And we have to be smart here I'm not joking, the top comment was, epic reference!
Yes!
I love the reference to that thing we all fucking know, man.
Deep cut, deep cut shit right here.
I think therefore I boogaloo.
Yeah, Boogaloo, so for people who don't know, Boogaloo is like Minion's Law for these people.
Boogaloo is the second Civil War, and I don't know the etymology of it, but I'm guessing it's because it's like Civil War II Electric Boogaloo.
Oh, that makes sense, yeah.
Is it always spelled with all these crazy accents and umlauts on the boogaloo?
Or is that just the thing they did here?
I think that's just like cat speak.
That's just like internet speak.
You make it cuter by doing the accents and the Swedish characters and that sort of thing.
But making it Eastern European makes it cute because it's whiter?
Because it's goofy and there's like dots and stuff, you know?
And I also think it makes sense too with like the whole electric boogaloo because this is kind of like a digital civil war we're in.
Yeah.
For the electric thing.
Yeah, totally.
Yeah, and James Henley asks the pigeon, is it over?
And the pigeon says, at this point I'm questioning if anything at all ever happened.
It's like, is Whiskey Warrior a deepfake?
Do we even know?
Like, what's going on here?
I just love this.
If you truly do your job as a right-wing meme lord, no one will know you did anything at all or that anything of importance actually happened.
Yeah, that's amazing.
Brian Bailey says, so people showed up and got arrested for nothing?
Not even a passive form of resistance?
Just quote, I'm here, come arrest me?
And to be clear, I don't know if anyone else was arrested.
I don't know if anybody else actually got arrested, because the only people that were reporting in real time were like EpicBaconWhiskeyBro69, who deleted like every post after the fact.
I have another guy, I'm gonna plug in this other bit of audio, a reporter on the scene who was live streaming, and it's funny because he goes to talk to a cop and he's like, Why are you doing a unconstitutional red flag raid on this dude?
And the cop's just like, go stand over there.
And he's like, okay, I will.
I'm going to go see if I can talk to this guy.
Evening, officer.
I just want to know what the hell is going on here.
I'll turn this off so I don't blind you.
How are you tonight?
Good, how are you?
I want to know what's going on here, and if this is in fact a red flag investigation, why on earth do you want to support this unconstitutional stuff?
You don't have to answer me, but I can sit here and I can videotape because I'm not crossing your lines.
You didn't ask me anything yet.
Alright, well, I'll step back, but you should put police tape where you don't want standard people, you know.
All right, well, I'll step back, but you should put police tape where you don't want standard people.
I'm going to tell you verbally what I want you to know.
Where's that?
By your truck.
Buy my truck.
Okay.
You know this is BS, right?
Oh yeah, it's the fuckin' boys.
Bein' fuckin' shit-stained.
Which is so stupid, too, because, like, I mean, that's just how the cops are.
I mean, do you think the cops were aware of this whole side thing going on, or were they really confused by the people there showing support for Whiskey Warrior?
Um, I think they were pretty confused, and then they realized what was going on, because I think they saw, like, people with printed-out memes, uh, waving them around in the cemetery.
I wish that this kind of thing would happen on like an episode of Live PD.
It's like a fucking Vaporwave Pepe holding... They're like waving around a meme of a Vaporwave Pepe head superimposed on a Roman statue that's holding like a Call of Duty AK-47.
Yeah, it's like talking about how big their mags are.
Yeah, um... So, yeah, so a bunch of people just showed up to get arrested, say I'm here, which would be funny.
Like, yeah, what are you... What are you gonna do?
Like... Would this be the time, really, to, like, stage a revolution?
This is the only thing that gives me confidence, is that these people are... Pretty unorganized, it would seem.
Pretty... I wouldn't say... I would say pretty uncommitted to the actual cause.
Yeah.
Because if they're this desperate that some random guy on Instagram who probably like got into a fight with his wife and then tried to spin it into him being like an epic, epic dude against the government.
If they're that desperate as to show up or spread this shit around, maybe it means there's nothing actually in the works?
Yeah, I think so.
They have to have a better scapegoat here besides Whiskey Warrior.
Were they going to do a Spartacus for Whiskey Warrior here?
How do you show solidarity for him?
I think it's a it's a good tactic to try and de-arrest people or try to film the cops when they're doing stuff like that's fine but these people are calling it the boogaloo they're calling it the revolution they're not calling it like we're gonna get this comrade out of an arrest yeah we're not gonna just help this one guy this is like their their stand against tyranny and
Is to drive to New York and watch the cops peacefully arrest this guy for fighting with his girlfriend.
Or his wife.
I wonder if they even, like, made any type of ruckus.
Did they, like, publicly boo that?
Or, like, did they do anything?
They probably just didn't do anything.
They probably just sat there.
Yeah, I don't know.
But, um, yeah.
So, not even a passive form of resistance.
Just quote, I'm here, come arrest me.
Uh, Trisha Lynn May replies, funny how Antifa gets away with some crazy shit though, eh?
Yeah, you know that crazy shit.
It's funny how Antifa has never been arrested.
They never get charged with any crimes.
Yeah.
Craig Mullen replies to Brian Bailey saying, Revolutions happen in steps.
Best is to learn their tactics and what can be done better next time.
So, is he, like, planning how to do a better, like, attic self-hold-up next time?
Yeah, yeah.
Next time you have to bring more memes, uh, next time- Bigger mags.
You have to have, like, designated whiskey reporters on the scene with, like, signs on their chest that say, you know, uh, I'm reporting from the bacon front, or whatever, so everybody knows that that's the person you trust.
Maybe use some Snapchat glasses to have a better viewpoint of the whole revolution?
Sure, I mean when Oakley starts making them, yeah.
Better hashtags?
Um, so if you're wondering, like me, why were there so many cops there for this, like, domestic incident or whatever, that is kind of weird that they would send this many cops who eventually got there.
Uh, the reporting is that one cop, like, heard a gunshot, and so that's when he called for backup, which, you know, take that with a grain of salt because cops hear gunshots all the time as a means of investigating further or entering a building or whatever.
So, take that for what you will.
Remember, cops are very easily spooked.
But, if you go to the guy's own Instagram, WhiskeyWarrior, you'll see a bunch of posts like this one, which says, when you're an ATF agent outside of a vet's house to conduct a red flag gun confiscation, and you hear, quote, let the bodies hit the floor, blasting from the inside, and then it's Ralph on the school bus saying, I'm in danger.
Like, if you hear Let the Bodies Hit the Floor playing when you're going up to a thing, I hope your reaction doesn't start, like, laughing.
My reaction would be, like, oh, there's some meth inside here.
Yeah, exactly.
This guy, yeah, it's just, did he, like, just watch, or whoever made this meme, because he didn't make this meme, but did whoever made this meme just watch, like, Fahrenheit 9-11 or whatever?
Is that is that in the movie?
Yeah, it's going over like the playlist of what the what the troops are listening to and drowning is one of them.
I forgot about that.
It's so bad, it's so bad.
Yeah, this guy is just like posting about how he's gonna kill the ATF when they come to his house.
Yeah, that's probably why.
And this is back in June 24th, so it's possible that he's preoccupied with shooting it out with the government.
His what is what is hashtag alphabet soup mean alphabet soup they are the it's like the alphabet agencies That's what they call them.
Oh, okay FBI ATF CIA that makes sense and His avatar on Instagram is Scarface shooting the automatic rifle, but with like a troops head over Scarface's head Yeah, so I can't possibly understand why cops would think he was going to shoot police officers knocking on his door.
That's amazing.
Well, I mean, was he playing the song or not?
If he's playing the song, they have probable cause.
If not, then, you know, they're just really being dramatic.
Yeah.
Which they probably did hear the song.
He probably was playing the song.
It's probably his ringtone.
Maybe he was playing Saliva and the officer didn't hear a gunshot, but he did hear click click boom.
Ooh, that's true.
That's true.
That's why he called for backup.
It's like a really bad Home Alone.
I'm gonna give you to the count of three before I pump your rotten guts full of lead.
One.
Two.
Click!
Click!
Boom!
"Mama Masada, 'cause of stereo!" - It's more realistic.
The cop is like scrambling over the Roman statuaries in the front yard.
Like jumping away from the door like doing a tuck and roll.
Amazing.
Uh, a couple more comments here.
Josh Henderson says... So, okay, so another factor in this story was that, uh, this dude has PTSD, supposedly, and he said that his friend...
told the cops that he had PTSD and he would shoot it out with the cops if they ever tried to come do anything to him.
Which, I mean, he says as much himself all over his Instagram account.
Not necessarily the PTSD thing, but definitely the, um, want to die in like a hail of glory, you know, with the cops.
Um, and so in part of the reporting after the fact, you know, they, uh, mentioned that The possible PTSD factor, which does seem to be in play here.
Josh Henderson writes, they use mental illness as a catch phrase spelled like craze.
They use mental illness as a catch phrase and people eat it up because they hear mental illness and think the guy on the corner yelling at the light pun CNN in himself.
Not the guy who gets anxious in crowds because of what he saw or the guy who is in a punk because of who he lost.
None of that makes them a risk to themselves or others.
But the sheep vote these ass clowns in and go with whatever they say rights be damned.
It's so confusing because like they have there's valid points in this statement.
But then it's all like this.
This person's saying, listen, mental illness isn't just the person talking to them in the corner, it's just people who may have PTSD.
But then it also goes on to say, so we also don't have to take that seriously.
Yeah.
He said, yeah.
It's so wild.
And also just the overall syntax of this comment, the way it's written, is a little worrisome.
And if you look at his profile pic, it's him firing a gun.
yes yeah in his army gear and a sweatshirt yeah so yeah it's just a bummer it's just like yeah josh you're right uh it doesn't need to be taken more seriously and maybe we can like help you out bud like And it sucks if this, if stuff like this is going to lead people to not, uh, what would you call it?
Like, not coming forward when they do have PTSD?
Exactly, yeah.
That's true.
It's gonna be really bad if this has the opposite effect.
If the discussion around PTSD has the opposite effect of people, like, trying to go get help when they need it.
Yeah, that's what it seems like.
Things like having a mental health database for gun ownership.
I mean, that's kind of a factor in there.
People are not going to go to the doctor when they need to because they love their guns so much or they think they need them or they just want them, you know?
Yeah.
It's like it's like this guy wants to this guy's has extended very very valid point and like Trying to but he doesn't want to like destigmatize mental illness It's almost like he wants to like make it seem like it's not a factor like it exists, but it's not important It's really confusing the statement.
Yeah, he's saying like oh People who have PTSD, it just means that they're socially awkward, or they're uncomfortable, or they're sad.
It doesn't mean that they're capable of self-harm.
Which, I mean, not all cases of PTSD would mean that, but some of them certainly do.
I mean, veteran suicide is a huge issue.
It's something that actually happens.
It's like an epidemic as far as I know.
So it's not every case, but it's not that PTSD never involves that.
I want to read just this one last paragraph from the article about this story.
In a Veterans Day post on his Instagram page, Booth says that he was 19 when he was first deployed to Afghanistan.
Which is crazy.
Yeah.
Booth describes it was, quote, one of the most shitty, hostile places on the planet.
My experience there helped make me the man I am today.
What a sad sentiment.
Yeah, I mean it's uh... It's illustrative.
It's illuminating.
I also like that he calls the place that he was deployed to to attack a hostile place.
It's a very interesting way of describing that.
Very indicative of probably how warped this young man's view is.
And yeah, yeah, we can think...
Our government, we can thank Obama and Bush for having a hand in making this young man the man he is today.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Thank you, military-industrial complex.
Okay, let's move on to the second topic of the night, which is an article from Breitbart here.
I'm going to read the headline.
Pope eliminates pork from banquet out of respect for Muslims.
Which is great!
Which is great, Breitbart, come on!
This is a good thing, right, Breitbart?
You're talking about how sweet the Pope is and how considerate he is.
Oh, I love it.
To the Muslims.
I love how innocuous this headline is, but just because Breitbart is the one who posted it, you're like, oh, you guys.
Yep, yep, totally.
When I first read it, when you first sent it to me, I was like, oh this is interesting.
People will be upset about it.
And then you're like, oh, Breitbart.
I'm like, oh.
People are really upset about it.
Yeah, they posted this to get people upset, and I love it.
They don't have to even do any... I mean, there's a little editorializing with the out of respect for Muslims because there's no, like, quotation marks around it.
If it were a direct quote, then it could be considered, like, more hard reporting, but this still is very little editorializing for Breitbart because that is why the pork was removed from the menu.
So...
Oh, it's just so good.
Such a nice wholesome headline, but it's in just one of the worst spaces possible on the internet.
So you know it's atrocious.
You know something bad's coming.
Yeah, you know you're supposed to think the opposite of this.
You know it's there as like a cautionary tale about what happens when you respect Islam too much.
Your park gets taken away!
Okay, Rome.
Pope Francis invited 1,500 mostly poor people to lunch this weekend to celebrate the World Day for the Poor and requested that all pork be removed from the menu so as not to give offense to the Muslim guests.
This Sunday marked the third annual celebration of the World Day of the Poor, a Catholic commemoration established by Pope Francis in November 2016 to celebrate the end of the Jubilee Year of Mercy.
The World Day of the Poor should be, quote, a day to help communities and each of the baptized to reflect on how poverty is at the very heart of the gospel and that as long as Lazarus lies at the door of our homes, there can be no justice or social peace, Francis said on establishing the feast.
So again, this stuff is fine.
This is like the best thing that you could hear from the Catholic Church, basically.
The Pope held the Sunday banquet for 1,500 guests inside the Paul VI Hall in the Vatican, offering a meal that intentionally eschewed pork out of respect for any Muslims present, according to reports.
Instead, chunks of chicken with mushroom cream were served along with potatoes.
Okay, so this is a feed the poor banquet.
This isn't like a ceremonial banquet for like, I don't know, celebrities or members of the church or something like that.
This is like a service that they're doing for the poor.
They are not like They don't have a menu, like, would you like the steak or the chicken?
Like, it's not like that.
It's, you get a big, you get a tureen full of whatever gruel they have, and it's the, because they didn't want to use pork, it is chicken and mushroom sauce, or mushroom broth, or whatever.
It's not like no pork was allowed on the side.
It's not like that.
No, not at all.
This is an efficient and thoughtful way to prepare a lot of food for a lot of people, while also accommodating most people that are going to be there.
Unfortunately, the poor vegans were shit out of luck.
Good point.
But the Muslims got taken care of.
Yeah, you can have some tatos.
You can have some taters.
I hope so.
This paragraph's funny.
I didn't really have to include it.
I hope other people think it's funny.
The gesture echoed a similar move this past October by the Archbishop of Bologna, Matteo Maria Zuppi, who commissioned a pork-free version of Bologna's iconic tortellini pasta for the feast of the city's patron, San Petronio, so that Muslims would feel welcome.
Bologna and no pork!
What?
What's up with that?
Come on, come on, that's not bologna at all then.
Archbishop Zuppi, now a cardinal, dubbed the modified pasta, quote, welcome tortellini.
That's adorable.
But many locals decried the alteration as, quote, culinary blasphemy.
I mean, sure, whatever.
It's not, it's not the tradition.
Yeah, you know, I mean, some might say comparing a food choice as to dishonoring God, you know, comparing, like, the removal of pork from the menu as a dishonoring of God, some might say that's, like, the real blasphemy.
Yeah, absolutely.
It's funny too that this is all being pinned on Muslims when most people of the Jewish faith don't eat pork either.
People didn't miss that.
People didn't miss that distinction.
Just in the writing here.
That might have been their stated goal.
They might have specifically mentioned the Muslims and not the Jewish people.
I don't know.
I don't have any direct quotes that have the word Muslim in it.
That's a very good question.
I wonder if it was for the Muslim and Jewish guests.
Yeah, I mean, maybe just because of, you know, like, Just because of Muslim relations throughout Europe right now are being so under the microscope anyways right now, that's probably what it is.
That makes more sense, but yeah.
Quote, the presence of the poor makes us breathe the fresh air of the gospel where the poor in spirit are blessed, he added.
Instead of feeling annoyed when they knock on our doors, let us welcome their cry for help as a summons to go out of ourselves to welcome them with God's own loving gaze.
And that's how the article ends.
The article ends with the most wholesome quote possible from the Pope about loving the poor, how loving the poor is like the greatest act of, I don't know, spirituality possible.
How to know the poor is to know God.
And Tom Hess replies, he's not the Pope.
He belongs on the end of a rope.
Wild.
Wild.
So what I love about this statement, and this goes throughout the whole thing, so a lot of people, Catholics included, think that this guy is a bad Pope because of how progressive he is.
Yeah.
He's the commie Pope.
The irony of that is that if you're Catholic, you do believe that the Pope is picked in a divine fashion, and that it's actually like the word of God that dictates who the Pope is.
So, like, when you're doing this, you're so mad about someone being progressive that you're ready to call God a liar.
Okay, so I like that point, but that's always, like, struck me as weird, right?
You were raised Catholic.
You were one of those weird Catholics.
Yeah.
How do you reconcile different popes giving different edicts?
How is that, like, squared?
Uh, I mean, you don't.
You don't.
You just go, well, you know, everything happens for a reason.
It's all for a reason.
Okay, yeah, that makes total sense.
Yeah.
Like, the reason why, the reason why, like, Pope John Paul, Pope John Paul II was, like, so great is because they knew that they had to, like, let Mother Teresa kill all those people in India.
Yeah, there were people who were, like, self-described Catholics saying that this Pope was gonna burn in hell.
Yeah, no, some people think he's like an antichrist.
Yeah, that's the big thing.
God allowed him to be put in there so that we can end this shit.
Frank Caruso says, well bless his heart.
Paul Benton replies, needs to be blessed with a 7.62.
Ugh, I hate it, I hate it.
Which I'm assuming is like a caliber of some kind?
It's like a weapon, right?
Yeah, as I say, I hate it because you know it's something violent because they can't just say bullet.
So they have to say, I think a 7.62 is definitely some sort of caliber that's most efficient for piercing hearts.
Yeah, um, so I just love this, like the Pope said, we should love the poor, like, you know, they're, they're of God, uh, you cannot possibly have justice while Lazarus is suffering at your doorstep, and these guys are like, we'll kill that Pope.
That's what we're gonna do.
What are they doing trying to feed, feed, is he, that's what's really funny too, they're just mad about feeding Muslims.
Not even, they're like, they want their bacon and they don't want, they don't want Muslims to have part of this food.
Yeah, I don't even think they think Muslim people are going to be there.
They're just mad that he made a gesture towards the Muslim community.
Take my pork away from the poor?
You're not even going to ostensibly ever get this pork.
You could probably afford some pork.
All these people are talking about how much they like Pork?
They're probably still gonna get their pork, even though Pope said, you know, no pork for the poor.
These people are probably still gonna get their pork, and they're still like, nope, gotta go.
Nope, I want a chance for my Popo pork.
I want the Pope to be hanged at the end of a rope.
Yes, because I can't have my free pork, because I can't go to Rome for my free pork at this one meal.
How many people do you think, well, let me phrase it, Take a guess as to how many people made the... I thought it was supposed to be, when in Rome, do as the Romans do.
Oh, probably so fucking many.
Yeah, I saw at least two.
Yeah, probably a grip.
Yeah, when in Rome... The Bible says give to Caesar what is Caesar's, and my Caesar loves pork.
Yeah.
Yeah.
When in Rome, do as the Muslims do, apparently.
Are you just taking over?
John Pratt says, oink oink oink, love my pig.
Which is weird, because you're saying you're a pig, and you're oinking like you are a pig, but you want to eat the pig.
You know, it's kind of fucked up, John.
Maybe you want to think about what's going on there.
Yeah, maybe he's saying, oink oink oink, I am just a pig for pig.
Oh, he's like, um, he's like the kid from, uh, from, uh, A Christmas Story?
Oh, I can't, I don't even know what he says.
He just does like the...
Yeah.
Sound and he's like, oh, and he like eats like a trough.
The mom says, what noise does the piggy make?
Yeah.
And he says, stop, you're under arrest.
And then the mom laughs and he like sticks his face in the food.
That was like the scariest scene.
I know you're supposed to be like scared of Scud Farkas in that movie, but the scariest scene was definitely the kid and the mom like laughing maniacally while he's shoving his face into his plate of food.
It's really fucked.
It's really, it's like up there with like the, it's up there with like the, the gummo spaghetti bathtub scene.
Like that's the same as the bacon taped to the wall, eating the spaghetti in the dirty bath water.
That is a photoshop right there.
Yeah.
Get, get on that folks.
Uh, so John Pratt says, oink, oink, oink, love my pig.
Uh, and then John Pratt also says, THE POPE IS THE FALSE PROPHET!
HE IS SATAN'S BROTHER!
Which is like a lot of credit, I mean like, uh, does Satan have a brother?
I've never like, I like how he's not even the spawn, he's the brother, he's, it's, yeah, this is great.
Um, I love these two comments together because these are two separate comments and if you didn't listen to this show you would think that these were two separate people making these comments because the first one It seems so different than the second, but this is just like a great, I don't know, microcosm of what this show illustrates.
That these people are extremely childish, and weird, and then also like violently stupid.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oink oink oink.
Love my pig.
The Pope is a false prophet!
He is Satan's brother!
Like, it's the same mind that did both of those comments.
Yeah.
And it makes, I mean, it makes sense to me now.
It might not have before.
Unfortunately.
termites are good says will hot take hot so remember the headline here is Pope eliminates pork from banquet out of respect for Muslims termites are good says will the Muslims get rid of the Quran out of respect to Christian nations Well, I heard they did stop force-feeding people the Quran.
They stopped taking pieces of the Quran and shredding it up and putting it down people's throats.
They did stop doing that, so yes.
The American government has not stopped doing that, though, depending on which black site you're at.
Yeah.
Yeah, so there were a lot of takes like this.
This is like, if you saw the live show or if you listened to the live show from the bonus episode, it's the same thing as, oh, is Black Lives Matter gonna be banned from the police station?
Yeah, same concept.
Same concept as this.
But it's funny because, yeah, will the Muslims get rid of the Quran out of respect to Christian nations?
So the Quran, of course, being the Muslims' holy text, They're asking the Muslims to get rid of their holy text, and if we're doing an SAT, uh, what do you call those, uh...
Yeah, that's what they're called.
That's the technical term for them.
Analogy, I think, maybe?
If I had taken the SATs, I might know the word analogy.
If you're doing that SAT thought experiment here, the Quran is the holy text to the Muslims, much like pork is the holy text to the American.
Yes.
That's exactly it, yeah.
We were forced to get rid of pork.
Are they gonna get rid of their holy instruments?
Quran is to Muslims as bacon is to Americans.
Yeah, that's it.
Yeah, that's amazing.
That's amazing.
And yeah, there were a lot of takes, you know, wondering what we're going to get rid of.
What are we going to get rid of next?
But that was the best one.
What's the equivalent?
Yeah.
Yeah.
David Arntz says, I don't think so.
I don't know what he's saying.
I don't think so, too.
Yeah, me neither.
Because the headline is Pope eliminates pork from banquet out of respect for Muslims.
David Arntz says... It's like, what's happening?
Whether you like it or not.
David Arndt says, I don't think so, and includes one of the more disturbing pieces of artwork I've found in doing this show.
It is a comic, digital comic drawn digitally of a superhero named Bacon Man.
Yep.
And you're seeing the bust of Bacon Man.
He's wearing a cape.
Uh, but his head... looks like... like the Slim Jim guy?
Kind of?
Kind of, yeah.
This is also a very, like, rudimentary Matt Groening drawing.
Like, just circles for eyes and, like, square white teeth.
But the color of it... I guess it's supposed to be bacon-colored?
Yeah yeah so it's like it's brown it's kind of red it's tan with like red veins so but it looks it just looks like when Bart gets turned inside out at the end of that episode of Halloween Treehouse of Horror.
Yeah I can see that.
Um it's it's a bacon superhero it says bacon man at the top And then there's a speech bubble from Bacon Man that says, sorry sand pounders, I'm comma here to stay.
They're gonna eat me, whether you like it or not.
I'm gonna get eaten.
Also like, when they say sand pounders, they're implying that like, Muslim people have sex with the desert?
No, um, there's a phrase called, there's a phrase that's go pound sand, which just means like leave.
Okay.
It's not associated with a race as far as I know, but they mean like a slur.
They mean a different slur that has sand in it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh, gross.
I knew it was racist.
I didn't, I knew that.
But it's like, I don't know if it's intentionally vague or if they just are that stupid.
Either way, this is really bizarre.
Bacon Man, he's my superhero.
What if the food you really liked were a freaking superhero?
Yeah, I mean...
In case people want to know what this looks like, if we do reach $5,000 on the Patreon, I will get this tattooed on me.
Oh no.
So yeah, you can see it then.
I'll post it on the social media.
I will do that just so you don't get the tattoo.
I like this because it's like, I don't know, the conservative version of what the liberals are doing with expressing politics through superhero movies.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, it's exactly the equivalent.
I totally see that.
We need Captain Marvel in order to do feminism.
Yeah.
We need a Wonder Woman in order to fight the patriarchy or whatever.
I'm glad the right wing is getting in on the action by saying we need a fictitious superhero called Bacon Man to fight Islam.
To fight Islam and the soy boys.
Yeah man.
But yeah just once again like this is sort of an encapsulation of like the the racism and the childishness of the American right.
Yeah totally.
Because it's just so ineffectually racist it's just like yeah what would you call it it's it's like um performative it's like performatively racist.
I'm gonna draw a picture of anthropomorphic bacon to be racist and it's not actually gonna like Do anything?
I mean it will like I guess help perpetuate anger towards Muslims or something but it's really just like you're I don't know in your own little bubble laughing to yourself about bacon man.
Yeah, like my veganism isn't triggered by this sight of a comic book, really poorly drawn bacon superhero.
I'm not mad.
Yeah, that's true.
When you think about it, vegans are equally oppressed with the Muslim people in America.
I agree with you and put it that way.
That's exactly what I was shooting for there.
That's exactly what I was leaning in there.
But I also love how childish this is.
Yeah, totally.
Bacon Man.
This is like, it's like a kid came up with like... Look, I drew a new superhero.
He's called Tricycle Man.
And he's just a tricycle, because I like to ride my tricycle, but he's a superhero, too.
And he likes the tricycle, too.
And that's why he's such a good superhero.
Uh-huh.
Tricycles, huh?
Yeah, and then you, like, pretend like you're gonna put it on your fridge and you just throw it away.
But instead you post on the internet and, like, hope that you're tricking everybody.
Uh, I came up with a new superhero.
He's called Pikachu Man.
It's not Pikachu, it's Pikachu Man.
It's Pikachu Man.
It's a man that's a big fan of Pikachus.
He's just a Pikachu guy.
You won't get rid of my Pikachus.
I know you've been trying to get rid of my Pikachus, but we will continue to serve Pikachus thanks to Pikachu Man.
He's gonna fight all the people who play Digimon.
He's just here to represent, like, white men that love Japanese culture.
You won't take this away from me.
It's a guy with a Pikachu hat and a sword.
Yeah, he's gonna kill all the fans of Minecraft because Pokemon is superior.
Yeah.
Don't even know how to game.
Okay, one more comment here.
This is from the Breitbart comments section.
EOD says, I'm shocked this Pope did not serve the Muslims cooked Jew.
He caters to the Muslims.
He believes it is his job on earth to cater to the Muslims.
Well, joke's on you, friend, because Catholics actually do serve up a Jew every mass.
Because Jesus was in fact a Jew, and they do consume Jew flesh, every mass, and it is actually a very, it's a huge part of the whole thing.
Wow.
You just blew my mind.
Here I was thinking that Muslims were the most anti-Semitic religion possible, but no, it's the Catholics.
Literally eating Jew.
But don't worry, it's like one Jew.
It's only one Jew they've been eating for hundreds of years now.
Little bits of flesh, little bits of blood.
He volunteered for it.
He did.
People thought the whole loaves of bread and fish was impressive, but the way he's been able to make his flesh and blood stretch for so long is pretty impressive.
So yeah, I'm shocked this Pope did not serve the Muslims cooked Jew.
Apache12, who has like a battleship as their avatar on Breitbart, replies, how did you manage to get the word J dash dash past the mods?
Every time I've used it, my comment is put on hold.
Usually permanent hold.
You must be saying some pretty fucked up stuff, Apache, to get you saying Jew on Breitbart put on hold.
Like, you're saying some wild shit.
Listen, every time I try to say the J-word, they won't let me do it.
I'm always trying to say that J-word, and they're always not letting me do it.
I like to imagine that he really thinks he's oppressed, but what's happening is he's just added like data.
It's not uploading.
But no, permanent hold.
No, I believe 100% that Breitbart does not allow people to use the J word in their comment sections.
Yeah, totally.
Because they have had issues in the past.
Yeah, totally.
It's been tough.
But I just love that he's like, every time I've used it, like, we've said the J word more times on this episode than I think any other episode.
I can't remember the last time I typed the J word out.
No.
And it's just, yeah, it's interesting that somebody would have such cause, have such occasion to keep wanting to use that J word, but they just won't let me.
I mean, I only use it when I'm making my menu for Mass.
Right.
We're talking about Jesus.
Still talking about Jesus.
Still talking about Jesus, flesh and blood.
That's a good callback.
Call that a callback, and this is a blackout.
Where we pull down the curtain and end the episode.
And I'll say the last word so that we're actually fading to black.
Yeah, hey, thanks for listening.
We had a fun time on tour.
Thanks to all the new friends we met.
Thanks to all the new listeners.
Give us a shout out.
Join that Facebook group.
If you're not familiar, we have a Facebook group.
Lots of fun going on in that group.
It is called Minion Death Commandos.
Go ahead and search for that.
And by the way, both of our names are Alexander and Tony.
Alexander and Tony are the hosts of the show.
That's who hosts the show.
That's true.
If you're in other cool groups on Facebook, I'll just let you in anyway, even if you don't answer the questions.
But it's a good idea to answer the questions if you want into that Facebook group.
If you want to support the show and get a bonus episode every week, go to Patreon.com slash MinionDeathCult, P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com slash MinionDeathCult.
$3 a month gets you that bonus episode.
$5 a month gets you the bonus episodes and a pack of stickers.
We also, I think, are going to have some fun other giveaways for Patreon subscribers.
Yeah, we're going to have some perks.
We're going to give you some more reasons to head on over to Patreon.
We've got some stuff up our sleeves coming up.
Yeah, we really appreciate all the support we've been getting over there.
And once again, thanks for listening to the show.
Bye, folks.
Thank you so much.
Bye.
Hey!
Shut the fuck up!
I would like your attention for just a moment, please.
My name is Sean Seavers, and I would like to introduce you to some tricks of mine.
The least groomed band on J-Tree Records, Lords of Louisville.
Presenting their second full-length record, Fuck All Y'all Motherfuckers.
Think about issues!
Cut themselves!
Oh, motherfucker. - Think about issues. - I want to stop. - Fucking asshole. - Yeah, you wanna hear a fucking song?
Skip the track, you dumb motherfucker!
Wait a minute.
Hold the fuck on.
What the fuck did you expect?
You saw the artwork for the record, right?
You heard the other record, right?
We've heard about these guys, right?
So, you know, what the fuck are you bitching about, anyway?
You know, what the fuck did you think you were gonna get?
Some fucking... Anyway, like I was saying, back to the fucking record, if you don't mind, princess... Tony, are you ready?
Bitch, give me a drink!
You didn't mind dick-sucking last night?
What about you, Eric?
Are you ready?
I hate the keyboard!
It doesn't work!
Shut the fuck up!
Are you ready, Chris?
Did you fucking geniuses read the track listing?
This is not a song, dumbass!
If you want to hear a song, all you have to do is skip the track, like this.
