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Oct. 8, 2019 - Minion Death Cult

01:16:25

Baby Eater / People Shredder ft. Cold Pizza Party

This week we cover AOC's new baby-eating policy (sounds nice, but will it work?) and Hillary Clinton calls for the constitution to be shredded if Trump isn't impeached (kind of, but really) Listen to Minion Death Cult on Cold Pizza Party later this week Support the show at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult and get a bonus episode every week Music: Young Widows - Rose Window

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	The liberals are destroying California, and conservative humor gone awry... Conservative humor gone awry is going to fascistphonia today, so stay tuned.
	We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
	It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
	Stay tuned guys.
	We'll show you exactly what it looks like when people are going to get you.
	All their environment.
	Stay tuned.
	All right.
	I'm Alexander Edward.
	And I'm Tony Boswell.
	And we are Minion Death Cult.
	The world is ending.
	Cannibalism is responsible.
	We're documenting it.
	What's up, everybody?
	Thanks for tuning in.
	We have a just jam-packed episode.
	I think it's gonna be a lot of fun for everyone.
	We have special guests here, too, as well.
	But before we get into that, we just have a bit of news to tease out, and this is kind of like really...
	I don't know, it's really an unfair thing to do to the listener because this news is so great and we just can't give you all, we can't give you everything right now, but we can say that we will be touring with Street Fight down the west coast at the beginning of next month, November.
	We're super thrilled that they asked us to do this.
	We will be appearing live with them, opening for them, several dates.
	Tickets are not available for sale yet, so stay tuned, pay attention, look for that stuff on Twitter and Instagram, but we're just, we're happy to have been given the chance and happy to fall flat on our faces live for the first time in doing a podcast at least.
	How do you feel about this, Tony?
	Oh, I'm elated.
	I'm so excited that I might have got a little bit ahead of myself.
	But I was like, man, you know, this tour might happen.
	And then I was like, fuck it, let's get fired.
	So I got fired.
	And I was like, it doesn't matter, because you know what?
	This tour is going to happen.
	And I was like, it's cool man.
	Like, you know, this tour is crazy, but you might be a little bit distracted, you know, um, things at home.
	So I was like, you know what?
	Let's just, let's, let's end this relationship.
	Let's sabotage my relationship.
	That way I can just focus on the people on the road and really give you a hundred percent of Tony Boswell.
	You're welcome.
	That's big of you.
	You're welcome.
	It's going to be, it's going to be a big deal.
	That's why employers should always give vacation to their employees because otherwise they'll just quit when their podcast goes on a tour.
	So we're doing Washington, Portland, a few stops in California the second week of November.
	So if you live in any of those states, around any of those areas, Stay tuned.
	We'd love to see you.
	We'd love to have you come out and we can pretend like everybody in the audience is there for us.
	We'll just have one person go, yeah, we like Minion Death Cult.
	We'll be like, see, everybody loves us.
	I do have a paid relative in every town, so that will happen.
	We'll have to figure out a way to flip the paid protester Craigslist ad into like a paid supporter ad.
	If there's any technology we can use to do that.
	Yeah, we're super excited about it.
	Let's get on to the show.
	So today we have two special guests.
	We have Lubica and Adam from the Cold Pizza Party podcast.
	How are you folks doing?
	Good, how are you?
	We're doing wonderful.
	We're so happy to have you.
	We did Cold Pizza Party a couple weeks ago.
	The episode has not dropped yet.
	It'll be out later this week.
	All about Forrest Gump.
	And it was extremely fun to revisit that movie through our modern millennial eyes and just kind of look at the politics of it and the weird sort of Culture that it might have influenced or been influenced by.
	Possibly the most Boomer movie of all movies.
	Yeah, it's like I said on the episode, it's like a greatest hits of things that Boomers vaguely remember.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, normally we focus on trashy TV, but in this case, with two boomer experts such as yourselves, we had to make a departure and really examine this incredible piece of art.
	Yeah, cinema.
	Straight up cinema.
	It's an American treasure.
	There's a question mark after art, but there's also an exclamation point.
	Exactly.
	It's only a matter of time until it's in the Criterion Collection.
	They just can't get the rights yet.
	Yeah, Forrest Gump.
	Art dot dot dot space question mark exclamation point!
	They're just redoing all the deepfake cuts.
	Yeah, they would have to.
	All the dubbed-over mouths.
	Yeah, but a lot of fun, and I can't wait to listen back to it when it drops.
	What did you say, Adam?
	Thursday, maybe?
	Yeah.
	Cool.
	That's the plan.
	Great.
	Alright, let's get on to this episode.
	So our first topic tonight...
	You may have heard in the news that AOC supports eating babies to save the planet.
	And this would have been a totally real, correct thing you heard in the news.
	And even if it wasn't, even if it wasn't true, like it might as well be because a person said that while next to AOC, right?
	And she didn't like harpoon them from behind the podium or anything.
	Clearly an endorsement of this crazy person's idea.
	I feel like a lot of people have been afraid that AOC is going to get into power and sell out, and I'm just really glad that's not happening.
	Well, you know, honestly, we advocate all the time saying things along the lines of, um, apathy is violence, and she in fact basically slain babies by sitting back and not doing anything, so I'm going to hold her to the same account that I hold everybody else, you know?
	Yeah, that's the only time she's been silent in her whole life, you know.
	And silence does mean consent, as we've learned on this show.
	That's what silence means.
	Yeah, that is what that means, yeah.
	What you didn't say no is what they're always saying.
	Yep.
	All right, so I have a post here from Shane Conroy, who shared another post.
	And so this is one of those posts within a post that you've heard about.
	The caption from Shane goes, we only have a few months left, dot, dot, dot.
	We have to start eating the babies, dot, dot, dot.
	My god, the left is disgusting and out of touch with reality, dot, dot.
	So that's kind of like their period, I think, when it's only two dots.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	The post they shared is from Iowa Stables?
	Iwa?
	Iwa Stables, like Iwo Jima.
	That caption says, SJW advocates to AOC at town hall, it's time to eat the babies to save the climate!
	Hand, what is it, facepalm emoji, facepalm emoji, clown emoji, globe earth emoji, probably the most offensive one in here, and then the 100 emoji.
	Yeah.
	They did go out of their way to pick the earth emoji that centers Africa, so that's fairly woke.
	Yeah, that was smart.
	Is the 100 emoji in support of the other emojis?
	100 emoji, is the 100 emoji in support of the other emojis?
	Is it like a qualifier for the other ones? - I think that in this case, I think, 'cause I watched a video on the alt-right and this like clown world thing recently.
	So I feel like what they're trying to say is this is like 100% an example of how we're in like clown world, you know? - What?
	Wow.
	No, that's completely accurate, because it is the clown world 100.
	Yeah.
	They're clowning it 100 over here.
	Yeah, that's totally it.
	The 100 emoji works very much like a blue checkmark for any post though.
	It won't let you put it there unless it's real.
	Exactly.
	Yeah, it's like the opposite of the red X in the Twitter avatar.
	It's like, I refuse to be shadow banned!
	100!
	I keep it 100!
	Um, so they shared this video of this, uh, you know, SJW who is in the audience at a AOC town hall, who's like, we have to eat the babies, uh, because you, you, uh, want us to change our whole lives to save the climate.
	And we have to kill cows, right?
	We have to kill all the cows and, uh, we have to kill all the people.
	Well, we could just eat the babies instead.
	And everybody's like, oh, this is totally real.
	It's either totally real or this person is just not crazy at all.
	And AOC, of course, responded by like trying to calm the situation and, you know, not further incite this person towards any possible acts of violence.
	And yeah, I mean, it turned out to be a, uh, is this a PSYOP?
	Can you call this a PSYOP?
	I think so.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I guess a troll, right?
	I mean, this is quite an interesting tactic that this woman has deployed.
	I was just gonna say, so yeah, it is a troll.
	It was put on by the LaRouche Institute, or the Lyndon LaRouche Group, or whoever the name of that Lyndon LaRouche Group is, in order to troll the left, or whatever.
	And they used one of the oldest literary examples of satire.
	A modest proposal, yeah, Jonathan Swift, of literally, like, eating babies to solve the problem, which was just an exercise in satire, you know, from the very beginning.
	People saw this and, you know, because of the public education system's been taken over by Common Core, you know, nobody recognized the obvious Jonathan Swift reference.
	That is the problem, is the education system.
	Yeah, I think that's the problem.
	You know, it sucks though, because I thought that they were really onto something, you know?
	As a parent, I will tell you that there will be moments where you're looking at that kid and you just want to eat him up.
	And I didn't, but had I known that it would help the earth, who knows?
	Yeah, you're supposed to suppress those urges, those ungodly urges, Tony.
	And now she's too big, she'd probably be gamey.
	Yeah, the more you let them exercise, the less edible they are.
	I can't remember what group this was in.
	This was in, like, Taking Our America Back or something like that.
	This wasn't even a QAnon group.
	This was just, like, you know, a normie-ass right-wing grandma group.
	And Clay Mel comments, So they are eating babies now.
	What the fuck is wrong with these dumb people?
	And I like that that's, like, your takeaway.
	God, devouring your young?
	What a fucking moron.
	And an idiot.
	Y'all are dumb, for real.
	Can't fix stupid.
	And then Shane Conroy replies, Yup, this just proves that Wikileaks and Alex Jones were both correct.
	Remember the Wikileaks document stating that people are eating babies?
	What I love about this, though, is this is the LaRouche-ian group, or the LaRouche group or whatever, obviously wild conspiracy theorists, very anti-Semitic, and then you have the Alex Jones conspiracy folks, same kind of vibe in a lot of ways, and so now you have this feedback loop of these people basically trolling each other in conspiracy?
	Incredible.
	And like, no one's aware.
	Wow, this one crazy group just proves this other crazy group was right all along.
	It's very symbiotic, you know?
	It's much like those little sucker fish on the whales.
	Alex Jones being the whale.
	Yeah, he's the whale.
	Yeah, and speaking of the feedback loop, I'm going to jump ahead a little bit to another video, and I'll plug in some audio here, but there's a video from a, you know, shoe leather freelance Facebook reporter recording another one of these, you know, infiltrators, these LaRouche infiltrators, who's standing on the street wearing a shirt that says, eat the babies, and he's got like a clipboard, like he's canvassing for signatures for eating babies.
	And the reporter is, you know, this person, is just talking to them, you know, while, like, live streaming.
	And she's like, oh, so you think we should eat the babies, huh, to solve climate change?
	And he's like, oh, well, yes, that's the logical conclusion.
	And it's funny because the person recording is, you know, like, oh my god, I got him.
	He's saying it on camera.
	And the person with the clipboard is like, oh my god, I got her, she's recording me.
	And it's just this great example of two massive idiots talking, like, uh, just tricking each other into thinking each of them is playing 3D chess against the other one.
	Yeah.
	And they both think they're, like, winning.
	That's the best part.
	When it's just a cats game, man!
	I actually admire the guy with the clipboard, how well he was able to speak, because it's pretty fucking obvious that no one else has let him get more than two words out before.
	You know, the fact that she was like actually just letting him talk, I'm surprised he didn't just stumble over every one of his talking points.
	It's interesting to see, sort of, you know, we have obviously this narrative of like fake news and stuff like that, but it's interesting to actually see how many different groups of people are sort of having trouble
	Staying tethered to reality and how, like I said, how much, you know, we're just having these like crazy feedback loops where, yeah, like this, or these comments here where people are just, they think that they've uncovered some, you know, hidden truth, but of course there's like a very simple explanation for what's happened here and they've just completely run way past that into like a different, you know, field.
	Yeah, it's like thinking you've tricked your mother into spoon-feeding you mashed carrots.
	You know, like, watch this.
	I'm just gonna open my mouth and she's gonna put them right in there, you know?
	Yeah.
	Moron!
	And then, yeah, going back to the reality thing, because Shane Conroy's caption, just, my god, the left is disgusting and out of touch with reality.
	And yeah, you're just seeing this, like, obvious troll job, this obvious psy-op, and saying, god, these people are just so clueless!
	Hey, they don't have anything figured out.
	I usually feel like there's some truth at the bottom of every conspiracy, right?
	Somebody somewhere has got to be eating babies.
	Yeah.
	Well, we know that there's like people eating babies, but like, those are like, you know, the Grand Poopas of the lizard people, you know?
	Like, that's just eating babies.
	Like, I mean, Hillary ate a baby.
	We know that.
	We know Hillary ate a baby.
	Yeah, we know that.
	That's what spirit cooking is, right?
	Yeah.
	Cause she's like 172 years old, but that's why she looks so good.
	Yeah, she looks amazing.
	Queen, she's killing it.
	Do I still have the comment?
	Yeah, one of the things that, I don't think I have the comment, but one of the things that the guy with the clipboard said was he was taking orders for babies in time for Thanksgiving.
	He's like, yeah, we have a bunch of different options for how you'd like it prepared.
	Yeah, every year, like a hundred people burn down their house by putting the baby in that fat fryer.
	Yeah.
	And yeah, some commenter was like, uh, my God, where are they getting the children to fill these orders?
	Mothers lock up, lock up your children and hold them tight.
	And I just can't like, like you're supposed to see this and get mad as a conservative.
	Like you're supposed to either see this and get mad or think that like the left is crazy.
	But the idea that somebody is seeing this and actually taking it very seriously is just very funny to me.
	Like they're really worried about their children being scooped up for Thanksgiving meal.
	yeah yeah it's like there's whenever there's gonna be a missing child around thanksgiving and like that's what we're gonna think that's what they're gonna come to the conclusion of even though it's just like their uncle but we're gonna think it's gonna it was some like liberal
	I like the idea of there being some kind of PSA around Thanksgiving, like the way there are around Halloween where it's like, oh, don't let your kids eat, I don't know, like, open candy because there's needles in it or whatever, but have it be like, you know, if you don't want to see your children served alongside mashed potatoes, like, hold onto them tight or keep an eye on them in November, you know?
	It's going to be like PSAs to kids being like, no matter what happens, do not crawl into an oven.
	No matter how enticing.
	Doesn't matter who tells you.
	Doesn't matter how enticing the witch's house from Hansel and Gretel looks.
	There are no more desserts in the oven.
	Glenn Proctor says, Stupid people needs the right finger pointing emoji.
	Lord!
	Left finger pointing emoji.
	Praying hands.
	I've just been staring at this comment waiting for you to get to it.
	I love it.
	And it's true.
	Stupid people do need the most lord.
	So, for some reason, when I read this, I think the way the fingers pointing at Lorde work, I read it like the full preacher.
	Like that one preacher fool?
	I don't know that fool.
	The guy who's like, you need the Lord!
	And he pop locks and stuff.
	Oh yeah, I know that guy.
	He's all, Jesus!
	For some reason when I see this, I read it like, I do the Lord.
	I don't know what it is by the brother's fingers, but it just seems like it's kind of like a hardstyle, just like, stupid people need the Lord!
	And that's just how I hear it in my head.
	To me it gives it like a dance flair.
	It says Lorde and then he's pointing to it.
	He just spun around and he pauses and points to Lorde.
	Totally, yeah.
	He has a shirt that says Lorde and it lights up when you point at it.
	Yeah, he's kind of being his own hype man here.
	I just like the idea that, like, what Jesus was known for was for, like, making people smart.
	Like, that's why you need the Lord is so you can get smarter.
	Get some smarts in you.
	Yeah.
	As we know, before Jesus was willing to feed you or, you know, make extra loaves of bread and fishes, he passed out IQ tests to make sure that you were worthy.
	For sure.
	Well, he didn't do that.
	At the time, he would just measure your cranium.
	Yeah, he pulled out the calipers.
	It was a simple rope test.
	He just had a piece of twine he kept with him.
	And if you met the parameters, you were... All the apostles actually had tiny heads.
	Yeah, my favorite miracles in the Bible are where he touches somebody's head and it grows.
	Yeah, and again, I just like the idea that these people are eating their babies because they're fucking stupid.
	They're so dumb.
	Not because they're sadistic or anything.
	Picturing, like, some father or mother at home who's just like, duh, what are we gonna have for dinner?
	Uh, I don't know, and just, like, takes a bite out of their baby's head like an apple.
	Yeah, uh-oh!
	Oopsie-doo!
	Oh no!
	We ate the baby again!
	Gotta get another one!
	Oh yeah, and this guy, Glenn Proctor, commentator, is a Santa.
	Yeah, it's a straight up real beard Santa, 365 Santa, Coca-Cola payroll Santa.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, this is a great photo.
	He's got two children on his lap, the full beard, the red flannel, a Christmas Facebook frame.
	And yeah, I just love the idea of a QAnon Santa Claus.
	We've had them before.
	We've had right-wing Santas before, but I don't know if we've ever had a Santa specifically in the realm of, like, baby eating.
	Um, and it's just, it's so funny to me, like, you know, what would you like for Christmas, little boy?
	An intact pineal gland?
	Have you been good?
	Oh, I just love the idea of a conspiracy theory Santa.
	I mean, yeah, like, he's gotta know some shit, right?
	If he's Santa.
	He's bringing the gift of disclosure, you know?
	He's letting, he's giving out the truth.
	The gift of knowledge, yeah.
	It's going to be nice this season, because I don't have to worry about my kid coming back and complaining about how Santa wouldn't shut up about Epstein.
	So that's going to be wild.
	Yeah, he's like, here, come sit on my lap.
	And then when the kid does it, he's like, no, you fucking idiot, that was a test!
	John Michael Coons says, TMZ is saying it's a Trump supporter.
	Not kidding you.
	They are trying to turn it around.
	This is crazy!
	And then Carolyn St.
	John says, the elites already eat babies.
	It's not a far stretch if you're awake.
	That part!
	That part!
	Say it with your chest!
	Say it with your chest!
	Yeah, I just love it.
	Well, we all know that the elites are eating babies.
	Like, is it really that much of a stretch to think that normal people will start eating babies?
	I love that, uh, like, woke has a different context to different, uh, millions.
	Oh, yeah.
	Well, they don't say woke, though.
	They definitely say awake.
	Okay.
	Yeah, Awake is pretty incredible.
	The use of that thing.
	And just like getting into this idea again of them like brushing up against the truth or like being aware of the actual story and then rejecting it.
	Yeah.
	Ginger Crater is arguing with Lori Hilton Taylor who was like, A right-wing grandma who was still saying, hey, like, this was actually a troll job, this was a Trump supporter, they're trying to, like, make AOC look stupid, and everybody was like, fuck you, liberal!
	And she kept on, she kept going, but Ginger Crater responds to Lori Hilton Taylor, I'd say you lost your mind, but you most likely don't have one.
	Far-right Republicans are mostly Christians.
	They do not partake in cannibalism.
	Dot dot dot dot.
	Moron.
	My favorite part about this, because she spelled cannibalism c-a-n-a-b-o-l-i-s-m, is just the idea that these people, like, because Facebook will, like, highlight for you that you've misspelled a word, you know?
	Yeah, it'll also tell you that this story is fake.
	What's your point?
	That's true.
	I just love the idea that as they're typing and there's all these little red squiggly lines, they're just like, ah, it's so annoying.
	Like, can't someone get rid of all these little red squiggles?
	Yeah, god, this interface is so ugly.
	Well, they don't even think they're being told to typo.
	They think they're just being edited.
	They're being censored.
	Yeah, probably.
	That's the first sign of being shadowbanned, is you keep on getting red, uh, those real red squigglies on your posts.
	Oh, red line, that means they know I'm a conservative.
	Uh-oh, they know, they've been doing the count.
	They're flagging my comments with a squiggly red line for conservatism.
	And then Ginger Crater also says, to Lori Hilton Taylor, with like no response from Lori Hilton in between, this is just a separate comment, she had like to add on to it.
	Ginger says, stupid.
	Hey stupid.
	Dot dot dot dot.
	LOL.
	Comma.
	If she were a Trump supporter, she wouldn't be near AOC or anything she stands for.
	Dot dot dot dot.
	Genius!
	She was in the same room!
	She was at an AOC rally.
	Like, how more clear could you make it?
	Well, how about you read, like, every comment about all the dudes who want to be in the same room as her?
	Like, that are conservatives.
	Oh, that's a good point.
	I mean, those are probably, like, rhinos, though.
	You know, they're willing to fornicate with the enemy.
	Oh, that's true, that's true.
	You know, I gotta say though, big ups to Lori though, because I know that most people who are really with the shits, they would have been like, you don't call me a Democrat, I use the hard R all the time.
	I just like the idea that AOC is like, or just like being in a room near her, like they're acting like it would like vaporize a Trump supporter or something, like no Trump supporter would ever go anywhere near her, like not even in the same room.
	They wouldn't do it, they don't like her, so why would they go to an AOC rally?
	It makes no sense.
	They won't even be near her ideas.
	Yeah, it's like it's physically impossible for, so could not be, you know?
	Um, yeah, and it's, you're just gonna see like, uh, I don't know, you know, they've already tried to, uh, get Elizabeth Warren with the whole, like, marine sex dungeon thing, which Jacob Wall did, which was so, so good.
	I mean, that guy is like...
	That guy's kind of amazing, to be honest.
	Like, if you follow his Instagram stories and stuff, like, I'm 100% certain it's all just a troll.
	It's all just... He knows how ridiculous he sounds and he's trying to sound as ridiculous as possible because there's no possible way you couldn't understand what you're doing with those posts.
	Yeah, he's low-key hilarious.
	For sure.
	But I'm just expecting, like, at a Kamala Harris rally, some guy is going to be in the crowd and raise a sign that says, like, I rape people and Kamala Harris agrees with me that it is my right to rape women.
	And yeah, and we're gonna have to, like, say, no, Kamala Harris is a good woman.
	She's not a rape apologist, you know?
	Yeah, for sure.
	Which, I mean, maybe someone's gonna do that.
	I don't know if it's gonna be me.
	We have to do it.
	As people on the left, we have to do it.
	We'll get the memo that says that we have to talk about it on our podcast.
	Yeah.
	And they're gonna figure out that we're a psy-op.
	Uh, Karen Quinnen says, uh, yes, get serious.
	First, you want us to become, which I think is like, get real.
	I think that's what get serious means.
	It's like, as I was reading, uh, yes, get serious.
	First, you want us to become cannibals and eat children.
	Who is next?
	Why not the elderly?
	So we can save on medical costs.
	Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.
	Heavenly father, forgive the members of this group for they have lost their minds.
	First they came for the children and ate them and I said nothing because I was not a child.
	Yeah, I was a grandparent minding my own business.
	I was totally fine with them eating the children.
	No one said anything about it.
	I love it so much.
	Go ahead, Tony.
	Karen, it is a bit of a quality control issue.
	Like, I hope you understand that.
	Like, we can't eat your old diseased meat.
	You have to test the new stock out first, you know.
	Yeah, and this is like something we've encountered on this show before.
	This was...
	What was the... oh, it was an abortion meme.
	It was an abortion meme.
	You know, those new laws that passed in New York saying that if there were life-threatening complications with the fetus, like, it ensured the right of a woman to abort, or a person to abort.
	And there was a meme going around that was like, Democrats allow babies to be, living babies to be aborted.
	Grandma is next, right?
	And that's like the same meme as this, but that's kind of like an old meme, you know, that's kind of like the death panels Obamacare thing.
	But then we got a take in the comments, a few times actually, the same take, and it was like, actually I think it would be Grandpa first!
	Why does it have to be Grandma?
	There's like a bunch of aggrieved grandpas, like, not getting their representation in the meme.
	Fighting for representation, yeah.
	And that's exactly what this is.
	We all know everyone hates grandpa.
	No one visits grandpa.
	And that's exactly what this is.
	Like, kids get all the attention.
	They get all the cannibalism.
	They get all the tax dollars.
	What about grandma?
	Grandma's beaten, surely.
	Grandma's as close to heaven as they are.
	Karen got mad engagement on this reply.
	Oh yeah, people liked, laughed, and loved it.
	And it also reminds me of... What was I just gonna say?
	Oh, there was something else.
	It was a cop thing.
	Oh yeah, so it's like that thing in the Forensic episode, that security guard who was like, I UNDERSTAND YOUR MERITS FORENSIC BECAUSE MY LIFE IS IN DANGER OUTSIDE OF THE BARNES AND NOBLE EVERY SINGLE DAY.
	He was like, he was like talking about how somebody, somebody was gonna like come back with a gun if he kicked him out of a store.
	And yeah, it's just everybody wants to be on the chopping block.
	You know, hey, everybody wants to be eaten, but nobody want to be eaten.
	You know what I'm saying?
	Thank you for laughing at that time.
	Everybody wants to be eaten, nobody wants to be a snack.
	I just really appreciate the Heavenly Father for giving the members of this group, for they've lost their minds.
	That's really nice.
	That's the kind of civility we need in this country.
	Yeah.
	Karen looks like a nice lady.
	I think I would get along with her.
	Yeah, you think you could find some common ground there?
	Yeah.
	I think we both like cookies.
	You know?
	Specifically those ones that come in the tin, the butter cookies.
	Yeah.
	The ones where you turn it into a sewing kit.
	She's worried about who will speak up for the elderly, and I'm worried about who will speak for the 30-something ladies, so I think we have a lot in common, actually.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	For sure.
	Can meet in the middle and just eat the 55-year-olds.
	Yeah.
	Mark Burchett says, I would have knocked him the fuck out!
	Don't bring that shit to Cleveland or you might get eaten, punk!
	Incredible.
	We don't eat babies.
	We pick on people our own size.
	We eat other adults.
	You eat babies?
	No, we eat you.
	Yeah, that's great.
	Hey, maybe Cleveland does rock.
	That's just normal Northeast Ohio trash talk, too.
	Just, you might get eaten.
	You might get eaten, punk!
	Oh yeah, they're also very proud of their minor league hockey team, the Cleveland Cannibals.
	I love it.
	Yeah, it is a very, like, 80s fake gangbanger warriors type thing.
	Like, oh, you come over here, punk?
	We might just eat you for lunch.
	Yeah, yeah, totally.
	You look tasty.
	Oh, you know I'm always getting bites out of the homies.
	Remember that scene?
	You've ever been eaten alive?
	You've ever been eaten alive?
	Ben Erickson says, "My thing is, are you only gonna do population control for white people or for everyone The Arabs have a lot of kids.
	What you going to do about them?
	Or are you just going to come up with some fake stat to make it seem like white kids put out more CO2 than Arabs?
	One more thing, why should we listen to a people that gets more crazy by the day?
	You people are nothing but a bunch of nutjobs.
	I mean... There's a lot going on in this one.
	He's really stewed in this for a while.
	This isn't just like, are they going to just do population control for white people or Arabs or whatever.
	It's like, he's thought more deeply into it.
	Here's how they're going to justify it.
	They're going to say that white kids are putting out more stew than Arabs.
	I don't know.
	Just incredible logic here.
	Incredible comment, I mean.
	It's incredible, yeah, the whole, like, oh, you're gonna put out fake stats to show that white kids produce more CO2?
	Like, I love that, like, I imagine, like, a woke tweet that's like, white farts are causing global warming!
	I just love the whole, nobody said anything about him being white babies.
	Like, nobody, at no point was anything declared by white babies.
	But he knows.
	We just know, yeah.
	He knows what's going on.
	We know the deal with the libs.
	Also, he's really not rolling out eating Arab babies.
	That's on the table.
	That's really all he cares about.
	She just wants to make it fair.
	Single-issue voter.
	Yeah, how do I get my hands on those Eric babies?
	They look delicious!
	I just want to go up to Ben Erickson with a clipboard and like, you know, say like, oh, we have scientists from the George Toros Institute who have proven conclusively that reruns of Friends are the primary cause of global warming.
	I have to tell you something really sad that happened to me.
	So when you have a kid and we live in the economy we live in, the society we live in, you rely on things like babysitters sometimes.
	This does not end in eating a baby, right?
	You can't trust those babysitters.
	Those babysitters will expose your kids to things you don't want them seeing.
	What I'm saying is that my six year old daughter is now a huge I'm a big fan of the show Friends.
	Because my cousin watches it with her all the time.
	Your sister's gonna grow up thinking gay people are hilarious.
	your daughter she will I'm like oh this is you know these are your uncle so and so Oh, that's hilarious.
	What?
	Well, it's funny, right?
	Because they hold hands?
	It's funny because they kiss and it's weird?
	Do they share the same bar of soap?
	Like, what does Frank wash last and what does Terrence wash first?
	That's an actual friend's joke, by the way.
	Oh my gosh.
	Um, yeah, I just, uh, do-do-do, yeah.
	I mean, you know, yeah, you can't leave your kids with a babysitter because, uh, they might watch reruns of Friends or that babysitter might just make herself a California cheeseburger.
	With your daughter.
	Outta your kid!
	Steven Monroe, last comment on this topic, says, Do they taste like chicken?
	Dot dot dot dot.
	Ask that clown if he's eaten any children.
	And if he says no, then call him a hypocrite!
	Exclamation point dot dot dot.
	Yep.
	Love it, yeah.
	Just gonna own him with his own logic there.
	Calling out hypocrisy in politics is always pointless, but I think I've never seen a more pointless case of that.
	I love it.
	Just these rich elites telling us we all have to start eating babies when they can clearly afford to, you know, continue eating cheeseburgers and stuff.
	Like, we all have to shift our lifestyles to appease them and they can just go about their day like nothing's different.
	I love that it's like, uh, oh you're concerned about climate change but you own an iPhone?
	But it's like, but you're not eating babies.
	You're not really down.
	It's virtue signaling until you eat a baby.
	Yeah.
	And you have to do it like an ASMR video, like that woman who eats the king crab, like the giant crabs.
	What's sad, though, is I'm so, like, fucked from this show that when I read this without linking it to anything else, I just thought this was a comment about Obama.
	You know, that's for sure what I thought it was.
	I just thought of our previous KFC vegan chicken episode.
	And, like, Stephen Monroe, like, peeking through this guy's window at, you know, at dinnertime and saying, that's BS, that ain't baby.
	Why do they even call it baby if it's not going to be a real baby?
	Why do they call them baby back ribs if they're not coming from babies?
	Yeah.
	Is it not coming from actual children?
	Honestly, this just really serves to remind me that politics is totally entertainment for a lot of people and not a whole lot else.
	Because this, let's say, these conversations that they're having.
	Remind me a lot of the abortion debate, where it's like, if you really think abortion is murder, then you should be doing a lot more than holding up signs to scare women walking into Planned Parenthood, right?
	And in this case, if they actually believe that this is some kind of call to action by an elected official, you would be doing a lot more than posting.
	So it's just interesting to see… Clearly there's a group of very—I mean, we know this, I guess—but there's a group of very comfortable boomers, or mostly boomers, that just sit around Facebook looking for entertainment, and this is their weird, sick form of entertainment, you know?
	Yeah, 100%.
	And you were like, well, if I was there, I bet I could trip him up with a logical fallacy.
	I bet I could stop him dead in his tracks.
	And yeah, it's just like, oh, what's my next story?
	How would I solve this problem?
	Type out a comment about confusing him with logic.
	Done.
	Next one.
	On to the next one.
	Yeah.
	I'm going to bang him out today.
	Yeah, on to our next topic, which is a tweet by Hillary Clinton.
	It was posted into Drain the Swamp, and this tweet goes, If the impeachment provision in the Constitution of the United States will not reach the offenses charged here, then perhaps that 18th century Constitution should be abandoned to a 20th century paper shredder.
	Which, when I saw this, I was like, that is the coolest thing that Hillary Clinton has ever or will ever say or tweet.
	Yeah.
	Absolutely.
	Until I realized that this Fox News, like, I don't know, infographic cuts off where Hillary Clinton attributes that quote to a black woman named Representative Barbara Jordan in the year 1974.
	So, once again, just coasting off the backs of women of color with her cool statements about shredding the Constitution.
	When I first saw this, like I told you, I was just kind of baffled because I just don't get it.
	I mean, she doesn't even have a job right now.
	Like, she has no job title.
	I mean, besides probably some, like, Clinton Foundation shit, whatever, but she has no, like, political job title.
	But here we are, just listening, and, like, her voice is still very loud somehow, and I don't know... I don't know how that's working, but just, we can't get away from her.
	She's just, like, she's like the ghost of Christmas past.
	Yeah, I mean, lots of people do care, though, apparently.
	I mean, this tweet had, you know, tens of thousands of likes, if not hundreds.
	Yeah.
	And a couple people cared in particular.
	Lauren Banesh says, Thank you, Madam President.
	Your intelligence and experience are always welcome during these trying times.
	Yep, yep.
	The Madame President part makes me want to die.
	It's so embarrassing.
	It makes me think we've all died.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	It's just like, I don't know, maybe, I mean this is also how I tweet to Cameron.
	So I guess, like, I get it, you know?
	And then Phyllis Sorrell says, wouldn't it be great if they let Hillary read the articles of impeachment to Trump?
	Which I just want to say, fuck you, dawg.
	Fuck you, dawg.
	Nancy Pelosi has earned that right.
	Excuse me, ma'am.
	I just, yeah, okay, so Hillary Clinton, I'll let her read the articles of impeachment to Donald Trump as long as she has, like, a cutout of Rachel Maddow standing next to her.
	Yeah, yeah.
	And then, like, maybe Robert Mueller can come crashing through the doors, like, riding a T-Rex.
	Holding an AK-47 in one hand and in the other he's holding a ref's whistle and he's just blasting the entire chamber with unsealed indictments.
	Like coming out of like a t-shirt cannon.
	Yeah, exactly.
	And then, I mean, then everybody will have to face the facts, you know?
	Yeah, everybody always talks about, you know, how much more interesting British Parliament is.
	We need to take that and Americanize it.
	Yeah, we need the same thing but with, like, stadium seating, t-shirt cannons.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Fireworks and, like, military jets flying overhead.
	Yeah.
	Like, what is the...
	Why would you want Hillary Clinton to read the articles of impeachment?
	Like, why would Hillary Clinton want to do that?
	Like, hey, I didn't get to be the president, but here I'm going to read the offenses against this president on the floor of the House, and then go continue not being president?
	It's just completely fruitless.
	This is a jobs program just for Hillary Clinton.
	Like what, I mean, you would just be watching, if you're like a Hill Dog fan, you're like dyed in the wool, still with her, and you see that happen, you know, on C-SPAN or whatever, it's just like, like a cool moment for you?
	Like that's all, it's just like, oh, epic!
	And that's like it, right?
	That's all that it is?
	It's just a thing that you can point to or DVR and watch every other night?
	Yeah.
	It'd be like the conclusion to the movie, right?
	It'd be like the revenge.
	Mrs. Hillary goes to Washington.
	No, it's like the time that, um, I'm like, I'm in a 0.5 second clip of a Poison the Well video where you can briefly see me in the pit, like briefly.
	You can tell that's me, like you know it's me.
	And man, I would loop that shit.
	We need to allow Tony Boswell to do the opening windmill at Poison the Wells concert at Showcase Theatre, Corona, California.
	RIP, RIP.
	That's where that was, right?
	Yeah, yeah, totally.
	Is that a true story?
	Yeah.
	Nice.
	Didn't the one guitarist go on to name that shitty band Sleigh Bells?
	I mean, to find shitty bands... Yeah, they're shitty.
	They're not good.
	Alright, I just saw them on SNL, so I just assume everything I see on SNL is shitty.
	It had its place, you know?
	I'm not gonna completely hate.
	Yeah, okay, but...
	If you're looking at, like, hardcore dudes or metalcore dudes moving on to, like, synth-based products, products?
	Synth-based outputs, like, you can't really compare Slay Bills to, like, Cold Cave.
	Oh, no, no, not at all.
	Well, it's just that I don't, I don't usually like, I don't usually like, like, hip-hop sounds, like, hip-hop noises, like bass and stuff like that, but when they did it, I liked it a lot.
	For some reason, I like this.
	For some reason, I liked it.
	I don't know what it was.
	Man, it's been so long since I thought of Cold Cave.
	I'm really glad you brought that up, actually.
	I was just making sure I got the name right, because I never even listened to them.
	I just know they're better than Sleigh Bells.
	Yeah, fact.
	That's true.
	That's a fact, yeah.
	Yeah.
	Much like American Nightmare, better than Poison the Well.
	I mean, yeah.
	Yeah.
	For sure.
	Um, yeah, okay, so this is a response to Hillary Clinton's tweet.
	Also, this is just so funny to me.
	Like, Hillary Clinton, the biggest enemy that the right has, right?
	Even bigger than Obama, Hillary Clinton is the main adversary.
	Just, what, the former Secretary of State and First Lady is like their, you know, epic boss.
	That they have to do battle with.
	And this person that they hate, that they think eats babies, that they rightfully accuse of various other crimes, is going on Twitter talking, even if it's a quote, tweeting about shredding the Constitution.
	Yeah, it's it's like bait.
	It's it's like, you know noose bait for these people and It actually didn't get that much traction Like I was only able I saw one post just naturally in my feed and I was like, oh bless you Bless you Facebook And then I looked for other posts and I could only find like two or three other posts about this and only like four articles about it, you know, using Google or whatever, which really goes to show like how much they're suppressing real news out there.
	But like Breitbart didn't have a piece about this, Fox News didn't have an article about this, but apparently they did like They did a piece on it on one of their shows because that's where this screenshot is from.
	But on the Fox News show, the tweet they splashed up on the screen in the background has somehow cut out both the attribution of the quote and the photo of Representative Barbara Jordan that Hillary included in the tweet.
	Yeah.
	And I don't know how they did it.
	Like, either they created a literal fake tweet using, like, Photoshop, or they have some sort of program that, like, removes, like, any photos from the Twitter feed, but there's a photo in her profile picture right next to her Twitter handle, so I don't... This is... It's amazing that, if this is real, they just cut out, you know, any sort of historical context for her tweet.
	Yeah.
	What'd you say?
	I said it accidentally makes her look awesome.
	Like you said, that's the coolest thing she's ever said, but she didn't say it.
	But it didn't get any likes on Fox here.
	Yeah, no likes.
	No likes or retweets.
	What Twitter platform, what, I don't know, what do you call it, what program, what tweet catcher are they using for this?
	Because it's still got the old heart, it's still got the old fave and message icon underneath.
	That's how it shows up on Firefox.
	But it does have the right date up at the top right hand corner.
	Anyway, so it was just kind of funny that this, I think maybe like even Breitbart couldn't really make enough hay out of this or like Fox News, you know, on their, their website couldn't make enough hay out of this because it is a quote.
	I don't know if that's like, If that's beyond the pale for Fox News to sensationalize this tweet.
	I see what you're saying here about the format.
	She's still got the square profile picture.
	Are you guys sure there isn't a secret boomer internet out there?
	There should be.
	Like the opposite of the dark web?
	Yeah.
	It's like the gray web?
	Just like a closed internet where we allow boomers to go talk amongst each other so they can be separated from the rest of us.
	Yeah, they don't get any of the updates.
	They just get a software update with all their fake tweets loaded in every couple weeks.
	Yeah, so one of the responses to this on Twitter though is Should I read the tweet before I read the handle?
	Which is... So the... Yeah.
	The tweet is just a gif of a Punisher logo and the word PAIN in all caps that's like vibrating like a You Wouldn't Steal a Car commercial.
	Yeah.
	It hurts to look at.
	It does.
	It's like quivering with rage.
	And the person who tweeted this, tweeting just the word pain, at Hillary Clinton, superimposed with a Punisher logo, is somebody named PrayingMedic.
	PrayingMedic, just totally nailing it.
	PrayingMedic.
	He's a big deal, I've heard of this guy.
	I just, uh, I just googled him because he sounded familiar.
	He has books on Amazon like Divine Healing Made Simple, Emotional Healing in Three Easy Steps, Defeating Your Adversary in the Court of Heaven by training medic.
	Well, first of all, you banish them to hell and then you don't have to even, you know, defeat them up in heaven.
	It's kind of weird.
	How bummed are you?
	How bummed are you when you get pulled up on by a medic and they get out and they just start praying over you instead of, like, actually performing helping things, you know?
	Like, come on.
	Yeah, that seems like a real letdown.
	You're having a heart attack and somebody comes up to you and they do Joe Biden touch therapy on your hair.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, and I love this, just tweeting pain at Hillary Clinton.
	Tweeting a gif that says pain at Hillary Clinton and I'm just full of rage and yeah, your name is praying medic or whatever, but it just makes me think of like Wesley from Princess Bride, you know, who's like having the final standoff with that guy and he's like, to the pain!
	First, I'll cut out your eyes, the ones you use to watch our Benghazi boys die.
	Next comes your tongue the one that issued the stand down order and then like he tries to get up to fake out Hillary Clinton that actually he can stand but he's really just too bedridden to even pretend for like 30 seconds Clint Baird says to Hillary Clinton We will shred you first!
	Uh, yeah, so you shred me?
	No.
	I shred you.
	How can you shred me if you've been shredded yourself?
	Yeah, not if I shred you first.
	Yeah, there's really no coming back from that one.
	I mean, owned.
	No.
	Done.
	Yeah, done.
	He did triple dog dare with that one.
	What's scary though is that Clint works for one of those Shred It truck companies where they come and shred documents.
	So he has the means.
	Yeah, and you know Hillary Clinton's gonna be calling one of those trucks to come get the Constitution from her.
	Any day now.
	Yeah.
	I want to watch a horror movie about a serial killer who has one of those trucks.
	That's a good idea.
	It's pretty good.
	Yeah, it's almost like the horror movie version of Place Beyond the Pines where Ryan Gosling is robbing banks on a dirt bike and then riding it up into the back of a flatbed truck to get away.
	But you just bring the shredder with you and just throw the body in?
	Yeah, and the main character still has a bunch of like shitty tattoos, but it's all like Punisher skulls and American flags, but they're all stick and pokes for some reason.
	Oh man, yeah.
	And then in a similar vein, Mark McCormick says, maybe she should be put through a people shredder.
	Well, I don't want to tell you this, Mark, but any shredder that's shredding a human is officially a people shredder.
	It doesn't need to be specialized.
	Yeah, instead of a Constitution shredder, what if we used a Clinton shredder for her?
	When you see somebody stumble so hard making such a lame joke, it's just heartwarming.
	I can't be mad at this guy.
	Yeah, and I mean, this was like the number one comment.
	I saw so many of these comments about shredding Hillary Clinton before I found a couple that were actually worth reading because it was all just like, yeah, we're gonna shred you instead.
	And then somebody would be like, oh, she wouldn't fit in a shredder.
	We'll have to use a wood chipper.
	And then somebody would be like, oh yeah, but we'll put her feet first because she has disgraced this country.
	You know, it was just a lot of that.
	Pain.
	A lot of pain.
	Not so much of a focus on the comedy.
	Just pure pain.
	Hate Marxists, rats, and PNs.
	That's their handle.
	What is PNs?
	Does anybody know what this is?
	I don't know.
	I don't know what PNs is.
	Pedophile Nuñez?
	Something like that, I bet.
	Hate Marxists, rats, and PNs says, Wretched B-I-T-T-6-H, comma, parentheses, is this Hildebeast, comma, the high corruptest, comma, her corruptess, comma,
	her most thieving, comma, murderous, comma, nation endangering, her most thieving, comma, murderous, comma, nation endangering, comma, self-aggrandizing, comma, lying, comma, shady A-5-5-B-I-T-6-H, self, dot space, dot space, dot space, dot, of course, comma, this wench would love to take a wrecking dot, of course, comma, this wench would love to take
	And then, to prove his point, he's included a meme of Hillary Clinton naked riding a wrecking ball a la Miley Cyrus.
	And then there's a further description on the meme itself that says, America's wrecking ball.
	And then, what is the fucking tattoo on her arm?
	I don't know.
	I don't know what the tattoo is, but it has to be significant, right?
	It looks like people praying at a cross.
	Oh yeah, it does.
	I think that's a naked man's body.
	I think that pre-existed.
	I think somebody did a mock of it and all they did was put her head on him.
	Somebody made fun of Miley Cyrus.
	Made a good joke about Miley Cyrus by being fat and doing the same thing that Miley Cyrus did.
	And yeah, that guy probably had a Christian tattoo on his arm, but then somebody else made it even funnier by putting Hillary's head on the body and typing America's wrecking ball.
	The best part is that the wrecking ball is labeled email.
	Yeah.
	It's got an email icon on it.
	It's an email icon.
	I love this metaphor.
	This is a great metaphor.
	So we're talking about Hillary Clinton shredding the Constitution, and to further describe this is a photo of Hillary Clinton sitting on a wrecking ball with the email icon on the side of it.
	Like, I mean, shredding the email would be the better metaphor, I think, right?
	Instead of using emails to, like, hit a wall that is America.
	Yeah.
	Because it was the absence of the emails that was the problem, you know?
	Yeah.
	We all know what wrecking balls do to paper and paper products, right?
	Oh, absolutely.
	So, I think this is a perfect metaphor, and there's nothing more to say here.
	Yeah, nothing more.
	We did it.
	That wretched B-I-T-6-H.
	Oh, you still shred your documents?
	No, we now pulverize them.
	We now beat them with hammers, and then if we need to, we'll bring the wrecking ball out.
	First, you put them into a deep freeze.
	Then you pull out the documents.
	Your Honor, those documents don't count.
	I ran over them a few times with my car.
	Yes, ma'am.
	As you can see, they are now too thin to count.
	Um, last comment here.
	Uh, John Smith says... John Smith, whose Facebook profile pic is, uh, the, like, default pic of just the silhouette of a head with a little twist because this silhouette is letting both middle fingers fly, flipping double the birds side by side.
	Although it kind of looks like he's surrounded by, like, two Teletubbies.
	Yeah, it looks like he's got a bender robot on either side of him.
	Yeah.
	Like they're creeping up on him.
	John Smith says, don't worry dot dot dot Killary comma patriots are working hard pushing for a constitutional convention to use red state majority and the one state one vote rule to rewrite
	A NEW CONSTITUTION THAT BANS GUN CONTROL, GUN FREE ZONES, BANS BACKGROUND CHECKS AND RED FLAG LAWS, BANS LIPTARDS FROM HOLDING ANY OFFICE OR POSITION OF POWER PERMANENTLY, GIVES TRUMP THE ABILITY TO RUN UNLIMITED,
	Bans the Fed, instates the Fair Tax, comma, bans the IRS, comma, dismantles the FBI, and makes new law that fires and replaces it with citizen review boards from each district elected like jury duty and each participant gets some of that lifetime money and benefits Congress gets.
	Bans legal and illegal immigration.
	So don't worry, Killary!
	Comma.
	Article 5 and a constitutional convention is in the works!
	Bye-bye, DNC and GOP rhinos.
	Hell of a comment.
	Oh, wow.
	Yeah.
	It's a good one.
	When you see stuff like this, you gotta like...
	I'm envious of their optimism, you know?
	Like, I'm over here just, like, hoping that, you know, hoping that, you know, Bernie can get in there and we can work on getting, you know, Medicare for All.
	And this guy's like, yo, we're gonna complete for the script.
	Like, everything's... And all it is, we just gotta get the paperwork processed.
	We're done.
	Yeah, we're done.
	We're gonna fuck this whole shit up.
	There's so much in this comment that we need to go through.
	So the Constitutional Convention thing is a real thing that, like, red states are trying to do, you know, once they are an actual majority.
	But yeah, the phrase, one state, one vote.
	Yeah, that's a great way of describing what a constitutional convention is.
	Yeah, it's fair.
	It's one state, one vote.
	The way it should be.
	The way it should be.
	Everyone knows that New Hampshire and California should have the same voice.
	And I love it, because yeah, it's not even about land mass at that point, which is already a faulty argument.
	It's just about, no, we are a state.
	So yeah, we clearly have equal voting power.
	You know what though?
	I always hate on that, but I feel like maybe if I live in a state that people can't remember when they're trying to list the 50 states off the top of their head.
	You know, maybe I might be a little more upset about it.
	I don't know, like, you know, I don't know if you're being serious or not.
	I mean, obviously I wouldn't actually do that, but yeah, I mean, I almost feel for those people who live in those states who, like, I know I would forget.
	If you ask me to name all 50 states right now, I'm not doing it.
	I can't do it.
	Not because I don't know them, but I just want to remember them.
	What is the federal government going to do that's, like, specifically negatively impacts New Hampshire?
	You know, like, I don't understand the need for outsize representation like that.
	Oh, we need it so we don't get picked on.
	Like, by what?
	By Wilmington?
	Like, I don't understand.
	Well, New Hampshire's much more vulnerable to things like immigrants.
	Yeah, totally.
	It's got all those borders on it.
	Yeah, exactly.
	That's more opportunity to breach.
	We were back in my hometown, like, on the night of Trump's election.
	And the day or two after we were arguing with somebody that, I don't know if I should call him a friend because he's like, he was part of our friend group in high school that everybody shit on all the time, you know?
	But I was arguing with him about the Electoral College and he was giving that point that like, well, if we didn't have the Electoral College then California and New York would get to decide everything.
	Like, that's an opinion people have, I guess, but it's completely self-serving bullshit.
	Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely.
	It's also just, I mean, in Ohio?
	I know, it's a big state.
	Ohio's a pretty big state.
	But there is obviously, like, a rural animosity towards all the culture, all the politics being dominated by coastal major cities.
	That's real.
	Yeah, that's real, there's a point there, but it's got nothing to do with the Electoral College.
	No.
	Not at all.
	The next thing that we should talk about, yeah, bans libtards from holding any office or position of power permanently.
	And yeah, so like, I don't know, you have to take a test in 6th grade to decide whether you're libtarded or not.
	Yeah, what kind of Supreme Court tests are they going to come up with to determine if it's a libtard?
	Well, the hard part is not getting qualified as a non-Libtard once, but you actually have to renew that license annually.
	That's where it gets difficult.
	Yeah, you might be able to slip past them for a year, but... Yeah, you have to get issued, like, a new dunce cap every three years to make sure it fits your headstone as you grow up.
	We kind of skipped over that he mentioned his like first five things are gun rights.
	Like that's already in our Constitution, bro.
	Yeah, chill.
	Well, the whole red flag laws, I don't think have been ruled unconstitutional.
	Yeah, I don't think so.
	I don't know if there's been a successful challenge to the red flag laws, which I have my problems with.
	So, you know, there's an argument there to be made, I guess, of like, you know, strengthening gun rights further than what, you know, the Constitution does.
	You know, I'm not saying I would necessarily side with this guy, because he's got a lot of crazy ideas when it comes to guns, and just in general.
	Yeah, there are things that these people want to do that are, you know, supposedly not protected by the Constitution as far as gun rights go.
	Yeah, gives Trump the ability to run unlimited. - Unlimited. - Yeah, he's gonna run unlimited.
	He's just gonna con- I mean, okay, if Trump, like, you know, doesn't, uh, I don't know, win a second term, or, you know, uh, just any- or just even completes his second term, he still will be running to be the President of the United States, you know, and I think this guy'll get his wish.
	Like, it'll just be Trump on TV all day, every day, until he dies, and that's, like, That's all this guy wants, you know, just for Trump to run and, like, make fun of the other Republicans and Democrats.
	Well, it was hard for him last time because he had all those limits.
	But this time with no limits, who knows?
	Imagine what he could do if America didn't hold back rich white men.
	Yeah, well there was like, so if you're not in the Facebook group, Minion Death Commandos, you need to join because there's so much stuff that we post and talk about in that group that doesn't make it onto the show.
	But like just tonight I was like, you know, in my feed and there was a QAnon group post that popped up and it was Jimmy Carter.
	It was like a meme about how Jimmy Carter fell and like fucked up his head and his eye and had to get stitches and then the very next day he was back to like building houses for the homeless.
	And it was like, the meme was like, you know, when have you ever seen Trump do anything like that or whatever?
	And this was reposted into the QAnon group, and the caption was, Notice his left eye?
	They all have this same injury.
	Possible Vril parasites?
	Which, which if you're unaware, uh, the Vril parasite is basically, like, the same interdimensional shape-shifting reptilian's conspiracy, but except it's the very specific strain of it where you get the reptilian Like, inserted into your left eye, and then it burrows into your brain and takes over your body, and now it has a human form.
	Well, you know, I just want to say... And that's why he's helping the homeless, obviously.
	Incredible.
	Wow.
	If you don't know about the real parasite, like, turn this fucking podcast off, because if you don't know theory, don't listen to this podcast.
	We're not here to educate you.
	We're posers.
	We need to learn more about this.
	Um, and one of the comments was like, if the Democrats would get out of the way of Trump, there would be no need to build houses for the needy.
	Yes, because he's trying to build all these houses for the needy, remember that?
	Remember that was a big thing?
	He's trying to do public housing, just more public housing, but these frickin' Democrats are just too concerned with making Jimmy Carter look good.
	The wall is actually houses, row houses, one right after the other, all across the border.
	I mean, fuck, one of the stories or comments we read was, like, suggesting that there just be, like, makeshift cells built into the outside of the wall so you could just detain the migrants before they even crossed the border, and then there was, like, one judge per every hundred feet of the wall to just, like, kick them back out, you know?
	It's funny because when they say it that way, it sounds monstrous, but I'm like, hey, how about we provide some tiny living?
	Urban tiny living.
	International style.
	So, um, bans the Fed, instates the Fair Tax, bans the IRS, dismantles the FBI.
	So, he's basically arguing for, like, pretty much a total deconstruction of the federal government, you know, banning the Fed, which I guess is the Federal Reserve, I'm thinking, not necessarily the federal government.
	Bans the IRS, dismantles the FBI, but instates the fair tax.
	So like, even in this guy's psychopathic libertarian utopia, we're just gonna have fairer taxes.
	Yeah, they're still gonna be there.
	They're just gonna be more fair.
	And you know by fair he means like flat rate, you know, it's like obviously actually regressive.
	Absolutely, yeah.
	Yeah, I mean, those are my policy positions.
	Every American child is mandated a gun, is forced to use them, we have a God Emperor for life, and a simple flat tax.
	Yeah.
	Those are my three things that I like.
	Those are common sense things we can all get behind.
	Come on, people.
	Yeah, I don't see why, you know, I, who makes, you know, over $250,000 a year should be paying more than, you know, some slub of a pod- host of a podcast who, you know, is, you know, barely making, uh, min- unemployment rates.
	Yeah, so don't worry, Killary, Article 5 and a Constitutional Convention is in the works.
	Bye-bye, DNC and GOP rhinos.
	And bye-bye, listener.
	This is the end of the episode.
	Thank you for listening.
	It's a good segue, right?
	It just set it up to me.
	I loved it, I loved it.
	Right there for me.
	Okay, so thank you so much guys for doing the show.
	Loved having you here and we also loved doing Cold Pizza Party.
	Talk about Forrest Gump, that shit was fun as hell.
	Yeah, it was a blast.
	Can't wait for the world to hear it.
	Yeah, thanks so much for having us, and thanks for the great convo on Forrest Gump like we were talking about before we started.
	You guys brought some definitely different perspectives than what Adam and I had, so it was really great to discuss it with you guys, especially Tony, who I think took the bravest stance of all.
	Thank you, thank you.
	If I'm anything, I'm brave.
	I mean, the cold, hard, just unemotional analysis was ping-ponging across the interwebs for that conversation.
	Lots of fun.
	What was I going to say here?
	Well, for starters, it was table tennis-ing back and forth, but go ahead.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	So why don't you tell people where to find your podcast?
	Sure, you can pretty much find us wherever you find podcasts or, you know, on iTunes or SoundCloud, at ColdPizzaParty, and I'm at ColdPizzaParty on Twitter, Adam's at Bone Camaro, and yeah, we talk about trashy TV and leftist politics, so check it out!
	Great.
	Alright, yeah, if you want to write to us, MinionDeathCult at gmail.com.
	You can tweet at us, at MinionDeathCult.
	Follow us on Instagram and Facebook, at MinionDeathCult.
	Join that Facebook group, MinionDeathCommandos.
	Look out for us on the West Coast, baby.
	Yeah, yeah, let's party.
	Yeah, alright.
	Yeah, congrats on that.
	Thanks for listening, everybody.
	Thank you.
	Stoked.
	yeah bye bye bye bye bye bye
	Hear the rays Spiraled out of control Future plans to be a praying man Find faith when convenient A quick wash when you need it
	Rain on the birds Motherland will come clean Unwrapped is better than all that's around me Can't see a thing Cut it off
	Cut right off from the gun right off.
	You know it's slow like a ghost.
	Can't be saved on your dying day.
	Find faith when convenient.
	A quick wash when you need it.

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