This week we're still covering the story of Botham Jean's murder at the hands of a Dallas Police Officer, including the "breaking" "news" that they found marijuana in his apartment. We address this horrid smear tactic, Fox 4 News' complicity in broadcasting this information, and, after social media outrage, their subsequent backpedaling and a complete overhaul of the initial report. Also, of course, the worst responses social media has to offer. Plus: A heroic reporter on the scenes of Hurricane Florence tries to snitch on people taking water and supplies from a local Family Dollar. Pulitzer time? Watch and Subscribe on Youtube!: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaXrtTt4xoQhrHQeZyWIRoQ
Yeah, how do I attack Geezer while causing the most disruption to the podcast?
I can see, like, little numbers working in his brain.
Looks like a little gargoyle.
Gotta distract him.
Gotta, like, don't let him think that hard.
Okay, uh... I'm Alexander Edward.
And I'm Tony Boswell.
And we are Minion Death Cult.
The world is ending.
Police are responsible, but not for the reason you're thinking.
It's because they're not killing looters.
Point blank, shooting looters.
We're documenting it.
So, first off, thank you for listening to the show.
If you're a new listener, say what's up to us on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, at MinionDeathCult.
Join the Facebook group at MinionDeathCommandos.
There's not an at there.
Just search MinionDeathCommandos on Facebook and join that Facebook group.
It will come up.
Second of all, watch this shit on YouTube, baby.
Subscribe.
We are at 94 subscribers.
So close.
People listening right now can't see this adorable kitty on my lap.
But the people watching get to see this adorable kitty on my lap.
If you want to see some hot Tony on Tony action, literally the only place you can see it is on YouTube.
Yeah, yeah.
Little black on white on little black on white.
Tony on Tony.
What's that?
You like Tony's?
We heard you like Tony's, so we put a Tony on your Tony.
And you can look at him on YouTube.
You gotta search MinionDeathCult on YouTube, because we don't have an address yet, and that's where you come in.
Gotta subscribe to the YouTube page.
We need six more subscribers, and then we can do all the crazy shit with the URL we want.
There are 94 of you whose fault this is not.
There are six of you whose fault this absolutely is.
Fix that.
Yeah, totally.
So YouTube, search Minion Death Cult.
Watch this episode, subscribe, like, comment.
Thank you to everybody who's participating.
We really appreciate it.
Thank you to Julia, who said she liked watching us on YouTube.
It's a rousing endorsement from Julia.
I don't know if you think Julia is not a credible source.
I don't know if you totally disregard Julia's opinion, but she's saying we're good.
I don't know why you don't trust Julia.
So that's about Julia.
I'm pretty sure Julia watches the YouTube videos, but with the visual description for the visually impaired.
So that's why they really enjoy it.
Because they don't see us, they just listen to us and hear us twice being talked about.
Have you ever watched a video with visually impaired descriptions?
Yeah, audio description.
Because right now they're hearing, Tony is continuing to pet Tony.
Yeah.
While also not being able to see me pet Tony, but they're cheating because they can see both and hear it twice.
Right.
You're taking advantage of the situation if you do that, I think.
It's like parking on the handicapped space.
Yeah, it really is.
Okay, so YouTube search Minion Death Cult.
Let's get on with the show.
Right up top we have a Random comment of the week.
Your random comment of the week.
My friend posted one of those free thought project clickbait videos with the Native American genocide as a topic.
Really wish people would stop driving down my street so loud.
It'd be really cool if they didn't do that.
It's a still image of Native American people.
Top text, did you know?
Bottom text, Native Americans lost their history.
Jesus Christ.
We're trying to discuss genocide!
Well, hold on.
Just real quick.
In their defense, this is the week anniversary of Paul Walker's death.
Let's not shame them for their culture.
Now I feel bad.
I really wish he would have said something.
I don't know why my notifications didn't pop up.
They're talking about deaths that matter.
Let's get back to this one.
Bottom text.
Native Americans lost their history, their land, their culture, and is one of the least discussed genocides in the world history.
Good post.
Good post.
I think it's interesting.
It's a total clickbait shit.
Did you know that the Native American genocide is regarded as one of the most important genocide?
Did they do a survey of genocide experts and they were like, Hey, which is the best genocide?
You know what I mean?
It's a weird metric.
It's one of the least discussed genocides in the world.
They robo-called houses and were like, hey, when was the last time you discussed the Native American genocide?
But to be honest, I mean to be real though, the only time I see it being discussed is when I'm seeing it be talked about how it's not talked about.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, I don't really know as much.
Like, I have, I like smallpox blankets and like guns.
That's all I really know.
Yeah, that's a lot of what did it.
Yeah.
There was a comment, top comment, on this post from my friend who posted this.
So, did you know Native Americans lost their history, their land, their culture, and is one of the least discussed genocides in world history?
Wait, hold on.
We have an opportunity to make this Tony on Tony on Tony action.
Okay.
Sorry.
Okay, now I need to re-read the bottom comment again to set up the comment.
Yeah.
It's a good point, though.
Native Americans lost their history, their land, their culture, and is one of the least discussed genocides in the world history.
And the third Tony comments, The Irish?
And you're thinking, what about them?
What about the Irish?
This is the only comment when I saw this post.
This is the only comment.
This was Tony's first reaction to a post about Native American genocide and how it's one of the least discussed.
And Tony's like, I've never heard anything about the Irish genocide.
It's way less discussed than the Native American genocide.
True.
I wonder why.
I love it.
This is Minion Death Cult.
This is the most Minion Death Cult shit I saw on my own feed this week.
Not only is it like, we've gone from, oh the Irish were like, people were racist against the Irish, to Irish were slaves, now we're at Irish were genocided.
The Irish genocide.
What happened in their mind?
Do you remember when, you know the Irish worked on the trains, right?
And they used to just not stop running the trains when they were working on the railroads.
They built the trains from the inside and then once the walls went up, they just shipped them off to the camp.
Yeah, they would actually build the coal chambers from the inside and then they had to just run it.
No, I love this.
Yeah, like, next, like, in two years people are going to be posting about how, like, the Irish are extinct.
Remember the Irish?
Like, somebody's going to be like, oh, the Chinese, the giant panda is going extinct.
Oh, yeah.
Well, what about the Irish?
What about the Irish?
When was the last time you saw some real red hair?
When was the last time you saw the Irish going extinct?
Exactly.
No one's talking about it.
I love it.
And so like, Raina, my friend who posted this originally, bless her heart, she replied to Tony's comment about the Irish and said, listen, uh, this post, it just says, uh, the Native American genocide was one of the least discussed genocides in the world.
This isn't taking away from the Irish genocide.
Yeah.
Like bless, bless her heart, dude.
What a sweetheart.
Like trying to placate Tony who derailed.
Yeah.
No, no, no, no.
Your comment about the Irish is totally valid.
What about my ancestors that I think happened to, like, at this level?
And so I replied, I was like, the Irish, there was no Irish genocide, Tony.
It didn't happen?
And then she was like, OMG, to me.
She tagged me and I was like, what?
Like, a famine is not, if you're talking about the famine, that's not the same thing as a genocide.
That's what I'm saying, man.
The famine has been whitewashed by the British.
We all know that the British went in there and destroyed every potato by themselves and they caused the famine.
The British went in there and they stole the potatoes from the Irish.
And they call it a famine in the history books, but that's because it's written by I don't know who's whiter I don't know I mean the British were whiter than well I mean I guess yeah I guess like the Irish are like they have freckles so they're kind of like colored people they have red noses yeah Yeah, I mean, you don't hear... You really don't hear anymore about how the British stole the potatoes?
Yeah, exactly.
I think that's what they're saying, right?
The British stole the potatoes?
Yeah.
No, this is just fucking nonsense.
This is just putrid, like, internet nonsense that's been culminating into the world's worst snowball.
You know, it's... Oh, the Irish were persecuted.
Oh, the Irish were slaves.
Now the Irish are just all gone.
See, the real story here is, people don't talk about this, the same year of the potato famine is the same year that the first latke was made.
And that's who's really behind the genocide of the Irish.
That's what Tony told me, at least.
Yeah, and then I just, yeah, I was like, there's no, like a famine's not a genocide.
What were you talking about?
And she was like, listen, it was just the most gobbledygook.
I'm bringing up the Irish for their history and I'm not saying, and it's like, you're not saying anything at all.
Like, it's okay to make a mistake, I guess.
Yeah.
Just like, stop it now.
It's like her defense was like, listen, this group of people existed so a genocide had to happen against them at one point, right?
But no, she wasn't even arguing that point.
She was just like, I was just bringing it up.
I, you know, uh, I am, is, are, we, been, because, uh, the thing of the Irish and history.
And it just, it was just word salad that said nothing.
I'm like, okay.
All right.
Thank you.
Then she ended with, go Notre Dame.
Yeah.
So that's, uh, your random post of the week.
Okay, so our first topic today is the continuing saga of Botham Jean, victim of a police shooting.
Something we talk about frequently on this show.
And the completely transparent attempt by the Dallas PD to smear him after death.
Reload Releasing the results of the search that they did of his house after he died, where they found a little bit of pot in his apartment.
Yeah, a very small amount.
Yeah, it's so fucked up that...
A, like nobody was having this shit.
Very few people were having this shit.
Everybody was absolutely outraged, especially at Fox 4 News, who's the outlet that broke this.
They released this literally right as the funeral, right as his funeral was letting out.
I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but it genuinely seems like they wanted people to riot.
Right?
Well, it's so simple.
The same people that allowed a person who just murdered somebody, they allowed that person to go home and clean up and come back for an interview.
Yeah.
And get out in a bond.
Didn't even arrest him for three days.
They gave them that grace period.
Let the family fucking breathe for five seconds before they get out of the funeral.
Why does that need to be public at all?
At all.
Other results from warrants are still sealed.
What's in her apartment?
What's in the cop's apartment?
What are they finding there?
A book called Love, Eat, Pray.
Eat, Love, Pray.
I don't know, what's that one white people love?
Yeah, it's that one.
It should be a rule, like you can't demonize somebody the day of their funeral.
You have to wait at least, you know, 24 hours before you demonize them, which is what they're doing.
Maybe we should have another funeral and see if we put that to the test.
Yeah.
Um... Fuck.
I, uh...
It's just absolute, like, it's monstrous.
Doing something like this is god-awful.
Like, dude was involved in his church.
And as I said when we previously covered it, it shouldn't matter.
You shouldn't have to be a fucking angel for your death at the hands of cops to mean something.
But, this is like the worst look for the cops.
This whole thing.
So bad.
Nobody's put, like, in my Deplorables Facebook groups, in my Drain the Swamp Facebook groups, nobody was having this.
Yeah.
Everybody was like, no, hang her.
Yeah, she sucks.
She fucking blew it.
You went into the wrong apartment.
And your response wasn't, oh shit, let me back out into the safety of this hallway.
Your response was like, A, no, I'm definitely in my home.
B, I'm going to assert my dominance in my home by shooting the person who hasn't even said a word to me.
Because that's her whole story now, is that he failed to respond to verbal commands.
Yeah.
And that's your fucking response?
I gave orders to somebody in their own home, and they didn't even respond to me.
It's insane.
It's just rude to not acknowledge me.
Like, I'm here.
I'm a person.
You know?
Acknowledge my existence by getting on the floor.
I was going to make some sick, fucked up joke about how maybe this person didn't have the capacity to respawn, and then I remembered that they've actually totally killed people on the spectrum in the middle of the street before.
So that has nothing to do with this.
My crazy hypothetical joke is a reality that we can't even explore as a sick joke because it actually happens.
No, people who are deaf, people who have Neurodivergent children or family members, they have to put signs on their front door saying, hey, don't fucking shoot me or my kids because we don't respond immediately to whatever you're saying.
Yeah.
I mean, even if you're a therapist helping somebody out who's neurodivergent, you're going to get shot.
You're going to get shot literally in the street.
All of the, so from the, so we can kind of agree that at least in the media that we listen today, the jump off for this, for the social media, for the very strict coverage, the jump off was Trayvon.
Yeah.
Right?
And from Trayvon we had these hypotheticals.
These wild hypotheticals.
Yeah.
Well, we need this to have people to care.
Yeah.
But we've had all of them happen now.
The joke was, oh, next thing you know, I'm sitting in my own house doing nothing, and they're going to come in and shoot me.
Yeah.
And that's happened.
Totally.
And, you know, and it's not, this is like wishful thinking, but there was like a very good response.
And it sucks that it has to be this egregious.
You know, it sucks that it has to be this fucking obvious for people to finally realize that, you know, the police state is not your friend.
And...
And there's also this like really gross tinge of misogyny over the whole, like the people who we didn't expect to agree with us or agreeing with us, there's this tinge of misogyny over it.
That's kind of gross and making it worse too.
But it's just, it's like the, the, what is it going to take is scary at this point.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, let's look at, let's, I mean, you know, not to derail this topic too much, but let's look, you know, that's a good point that you've brought up.
Like, you used to make, we used to make like hypotheticals, like you were saying, like, yeah, well, what if it was like an NRA guy getting shot by the cops while he legally could, wouldn't you be triggered by that?
Well, we had that.
Philando Castile.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Law abiding gun owner have open carry telling the cop that he had a gun on him open carrying.
He had his permit and all that and still just get shot shot point blank.
There's been so many now that you would think at this point you would have had an example of somebody being like, oh, well, they really were a monster, even if they weren't a monster at this particular moment.
Right.
Who?
Which side were you?
No, this never happened.
Okay.
I'm saying, though, maybe the person who, like, the victim, maybe the victim really was a monster, but maybe not at this moment.
But we haven't had that.
It's been model citizens.
Yeah.
It's been I mean, Flandel was, like, known for paying for people's lunches.
Yep.
Out of his pocket.
Not making much money because he's working on the lunch line.
But they did that thing with Trayvon.
They did this thing with Trayvon.
They were like, oh, he had weed on him in high school.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
The whole thing is like, it doesn't fucking matter, man.
It doesn't fucking matter.
No, it doesn't matter.
You know, they got the Mark McCain, so that's all that matters.
That's the end of the day.
That's the one.
It's fucking wild.
This might be like the most... Because they do that every time.
This is nothing new.
The smearing of the victim after the fact is nothing new.
He was no angel is like a meme.
That's a fucking meme at this point.
But this is maybe just like the most... Because we are all aware of that meme.
And then for them to just blatantly do it when it's not going to help them at all.
Like they should have realized that this is not going to fucking help them.
I think a lot of it was in Texas.
And in Texas, weed's very illegal in Texas.
Even though all of my white friends that live in Texas smoke all the weed.
And good for them.
Everyone should smoke weed.
But it's very illegal there.
It's not legal at all.
So all they saw was crime.
There's a crime here.
Like you said, it's 10.8 grams of weed.
Less than half an ounce.
In California, I can walk down the street with that in the palm of my hand in front of a cop.
That's not a crime.
Not even close to a crime.
And in Texas, they're saying, well, maybe that's why he had it coming.
Yeah, I mean, everything's bigger in Texas, including the hypocrisy.
So Fox 4 News is the outlet that broke this shit.
They broke it on Facebook.
They broke it on Twitter.
And it's just astounding how little they have and how blatant this was.
Because the headline was literally... Breaking.
Marijuana found in Botham Jean's apartment after deadly shooting.
This was the news.
Breaking!
We found drugs on the dead black guy.
Yep.
Breaking!
Everybody needs to know!
News alert!
Extra!
Extra!
We found marijuana on this supposed innocent victim's property.
Not property, but place of residence.
I like to imagine someone out there's trying to find this story, right?
And they're googling all the right words, the key words.
Marijuana.
White woman.
Death.
And then it comes up like, uh, you know, uh, Sarah, Sarah whatever starts new weed business and she's thriving and it's like some like white mom who's like tinctures.
Yeah.
Sarah Thompson will be the death of her competitors.
Exactly.
In the new, with her new marijuana dispensary.
Yeah.
Yeah, so everybody got really mad at Fox News, Fox 4 News, this is like a local affiliate, when they posted this shit.
So they literally changed the caption and they changed the headline.
They changed the caption on the post to be breaking a search warrant just made public, says investigators found 10.4 grams of marijuana in Botham Jean's apartment.
His family's attorneys say it's just an attempt to defame him.
So yeah, obviously.
And what the attorneys mean when they say that is that this was a Fox 4 News attempt to defame him.
Yes.
This is a working in conjunction with the Dallas PD.
This is not a story.
No, and so now Fox News has turned themselves into this story, but are, you know, also trying to keep their own names out of it.
But basically, yeah, they had to put the response to their own fucked up story in the caption.
And then the headline they changed it to is even They changed the headline from Search Warrant Marijuana Found in Botham Jean's Apartment After Deadly Shooting to Lawyers Disgusted by Release of Search Warrant Showing Marijuana Found in Botham Jean's Apartment.
So it's just a totally different story.
Yeah.
Oh, we didn't publish that thing smearing an innocent dead man.
We never did that.
This is what it was always about.
This is one of my favorite things about doing this show, is we find an article early in the story, right?
We find an article early in the release of it, and then we go back to skim over it one more time right before we record or something like that, and we're like, oh, shit.
Yeah.
They changed it.
They realize they fucked up and they're shameless and they're gross and they think that their stuff is gone and they are wrong.
And it doesn't say update with the changes.
All it says is posted September 13, 2008 at 4.47, updated at September 13, 9.26 p.m.
Yeah.
So they updated it five hours later to address the backlash that they got.
Without acknowledging that they're addressing the backlash.
I don't even think they put a... Oh, no.
No way.
They didn't even put a postscript or anything on here.
If there was an acknowledgement, there would be a delete of this story and an apology letter.
Yeah.
But that shit ain't gonna happen.
No.
Yeah.
So, uh... Really rotten shit.
Let's get into content.
Like we said, um, one of the lawyers said, and this is, this is the true, this is encompasses the whole, what's gross about this whole story.
Both of them was 26 years old.
This is, this is what the lawyer said, right?
Both of them was 26 years old.
He lived his entire life spotless.
Yeah.
It wasn't until a white woman, Basically broke into his house and murdered him at point blank for him to become a criminal.
Yep.
That's what the lawyers said.
His family lawyers were like, listen, why is it now that he's dead at the hands of this white officer that now we're thinking he's a criminal?
They literally like, they killed him and then turned him into a criminal.
Two weeks ago, they would have killed to have him take a picture in a MAGA hat.
Oh, sure, sure.
But now, because we gotta make her look not crazy...
We gotta make him look like a criminal.
They're like, oh, what's his Instagram feed?
Do we have anything of him, like, uh, I don't know, throwing up a fist?
Yeah.
Or anything like that?
Uh, do we have anything of him, like, listening to rap music?
Can we get his Spotify?
Is Spotify, uh, recently played?
Is he listening to any, uh, aggressive music?
Oh, no, it's just a bunch of Machine Gun Kelly.
It's no use to us.
Goddammit.
There was one quote from this fucking article that just really pissed me off.
Attorney Pete Schulte, Schulte, I don't know, Schulte, who is not connected to the case, so this is just somebody that- Some nosy motherfucker.
Well, this is somebody that Fox reached out to.
This is somebody that Fox has on, like, this is their legal count, their legal correspondent, right?
Attorney Pete Schulte, who is not connected to the case, says the defense will likely bring it up in trial if the marijuana turns out to be his.
So, This dude's saying, yeah, the defense, the people defending the killer cop will definitely bring up the marijuana at trial if it turns out to be his.
They go on to say, Quote, I'm not saying Mr. Gene is a bad guy because he had some marijuana in his apartment, Schulte said, but it could help add some explanation to this crazy case.
It just adds another layer of complexity.
Does it?
What fucking world do you live in?
A, your fucking metaphor is totally mixed because how would adding another layer of complexity help explain anything?
B, how does him getting shot in his own apartment, how is that explained by having weed?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, he was too high that he moved too slowly to dodge the bullet.
Yeah.
Ugh.
It could help add some explanation to this crazy case!
Why would a cop just go into a random apartment and shoot the person in there?
He must have been high.
He must have been high as a kite.
He must have been high and that's why he didn't immediately start licking her boots the second she barged into his own apartment.
Crazy shit that we just take for granted in our media.
Let's get into comments.
Oh boy, you're not going to be able to read that, huh?
Nope.
Do you have it on your phone still?
Yeah.
So, uh, get a life, folks.
Give us a little inside baseball here.
This is from the Fox News comment section.
Yes.
This comment says, uh, how about they search the apartment for any evidence the police officer had a relationship or some other reason to be there to test your story?
They searched for evidence to see if the police officer had a relationship with the dude she killed.
This was like such a common conspiracy theory.
people like legit thought well their excuse was like well maybe they were fucking yeah so that's why she killed him like i saw i saw a bunch of these comments but none of them were like interesting to read them yeah interesting enough to read on the last episode but it's definitely out there and it's like
a it gets into this like weird hero worship we have of cops that oh no like it couldn't have just been an idiotic mistake coupled with an extremely aggressive training procedure and sort of um tactics used by police also Oh, she's a lady cop.
She was just mad at her man.
Or I like the theory that she was trying to save him from his life of weed and it just went too far.
Well, I mean, depending on what hardcore bands you listen to, a bullet in the chamber is the same thing as a cigarette in your mouth or a weed joint in your mouth.
On that note, kill your local drug dealer.
I don't mean that because I don't want to die.
To test your story, no one has released any quote, bad information about the victim.
Listen, no one said anything bad about the victim except for this entire article.
Keep going.
The small amount seemed like he was a really good guy.
Yeah, okay, so what they're saying is that, no, Weed is good and like the cops weren't trying to do anything by releasing this good information about him.
Yeah.
This is just good.
This made him seem really chill.
If anything, this helps his case.
I'm starting to forget why we picked this comment.
It's really strange.
No, but yeah, they're literally saying, uh, nobody's said anything bad or tried to smear him at all because marijuana is good.
Yeah.
This is like such a lib take.
There's such a lib take.
Yeah.
They go on and say, this is a tragedy.
I'm giving a dramatic pause here because it gets wild.
And I will wait for all the evidence before I judge.
Yeah.
Fuck.
This is like, this is another weird American century, maybe it's not just America, but it's something that I see specifically in America, is the idea of a tragedy without anybody being responsible for the tragedy, or like there being a sort of like, Yeah.
dynamic or causal relationship between two parties in a quote tragedy.
Like with the Redlands shooting, the guy who was, the person who was suicidal and the cops came and shot him when he ran away.
They shot him when he ran away. - 'Cause he was surrounded by cops.
Terrified.
Go ahead.
Not in his right state of mind.
Yeah.
And people in the comment section were like, God, this is just such a tragedy for everyone involved.
My heart goes out to the Redlands PD.
Yeah.
It's like, how is this a tragedy for them?
They're the ones who did it.
The guy with Pike felt alive for the first time.
That was the first time you... Oh, he's probably... A gun feels different when they penetrate flesh.
He's probably listening to P.O.D.
Yep.
Yep.
Every day is a new day!
I'm thankful for every breath I take!
Won't take it for granted!
I feel like P.O.D.
loves cops, but we'll get into that later.
So, this is a strategy and I will wait for evidence before I judge.
I will not immediately jump to racism.
Don't get good for you!
Because...
Because, so far, other than statements from the family and their attorney, there has been no evidence of race having anything to do with this.
Listen, only his family and their attorney are the ones saying that this is racist.
Like, the police department hasn't said this is racist yet, so it's definitely not racist.
I also love, like, I'm gonna wait for all the evidence to come out before I assign blame.
She said she did it!
No.
She said she did it!
But listen, no, this person is keeping a completely fair and balanced, unbiased opinion.
Uh-huh.
This person does not have a dog in this fight.
No, yeah, it's totally reasonable, normal comments.
So if I can just finish reading it, maybe I can just tell you how this person's... Uh-huh.
While I am a retired female police officer...
I know how hard- Fuck.
I know how hard it is to go a day without entering the wrong apartment and shooting whoever lives there.
I've been there!
Well, I know that.
I make no excuse for this officer, and until they release more facts, everything else is just someone with an agenda trying to create more of a controversy as if there isn't enough tragedy.
Yeah, the facts are gonna come out that, uh... Oh, it turns out that, um...
What do you call it?
The apartment they lived in was actually that apartment from Futurama, The Beast with a Billion Backs, where the apartment itself rises or lowers to the level where your apartment's at and you just wait there and then you enter your apartment.
And the apartment didn't rise to the correct level.
And, you know, it's just unfortunate.
Like, you know, but that's what automation gets you.
That's what happens when you ask for a living wage.
That's where we're heading.
Yeah, you elevator operators looking to unionize and shit, well... Fucking chill.
You're gonna get more dead black men.
Yeah.
Sorry.
No, yeah, what other information is gonna come out that makes this woman who admitted to entering the wrong apartment and killing whoever was in there... This case should be closed.
Should be done already.
This case should just be...
Oh, I'm a dummy.
I went in the wrong apartment.
Oops.
I feel embarrassed.
Let me back out slowly.
Before this person calls the cops and embarrasses me in front of my co-workers.
Maybe that's what it was.
Maybe she just killed him so that she didn't have to get razzed by her fellow cops.
The conversation was probably like, what are you doing, man?
Don't tell anybody about this.
Dead.
That's it.
That was the whole conversation.
He didn't even respond.
He had no chance to.
According to her story, so like the most charitable...
The most charitable interpretation of her story is that he just didn't say anything.
And that's why she killed him.
He didn't even say, get the fuck out of my apartment.
Yeah.
Which is what I would have said.
Probably.
Which is what anyone would have any right to say, get the fuck out.
What are you doing in here?
Just because he was silent.
She killed him.
It's so terrifying.
Cause like, so.
Every time I'm just driving and I see a cop behind or in front of me, I'm very aware and I just want to do everything correctly.
And I'm also like, I hope my phone has enough battery.
I hope I can record everything that's going to happen.
I hope I can go on to tell whatever story might happen.
You hope you can even use your phone without getting shot at.
Exactly.
But when you go home, you can turn that off.
When you go home and you close that door behind you, even if it's ajar, even if I'm in my home and my door is open, I get to turn that off.
I don't have security cameras in my home.
I'm not streaming my life on Twitch.
Just YouTube.
You get to turn that off.
And in that moment, I couldn't imagine what was going through his head.
Just terrified.
Yeah, absolutely.
When the police come to your door, they knock on the door loudly and aggressively and say, police open up.
You have a moment to process.
Yeah.
He had nothing.
No.
He had nothing.
But imagine how scared she was, too.
You know what he was probably fucking doing?
He was probably praying because he was terrified.
And that's real.
Yeah.
It's, um... You know, people are saying, like, oh, his door was... I guess we'll get into that comment.
We can wait for that comment.
Let's get into the next one.
I can put it over there.
Yeah, so uh, what is it?
Marvelous Hour?
Said, and rightfully so.
Cop overreacted.
Favorite black man.
But um, it all cost money, had a little something to say about that.
Because humans have flaws.
15 hour shift?
A small woman defending herself?
Terrified?
No excuses.
Young man should have not been shot.
What the fuck?
Then shut the fuck up.
Yeah.
Then shut the fuck up.
No excuses except the one I just made in the previous sentence.
I don't know if you ever worked a 15-hour day, but when I'm done working a 15-hour day, I just want to shoot a guy.
Yeah.
This is, like, in those deplorables groups that I'm part of, in the Diamond and Silk, in this Drain the Swamp.
I mean, I actually didn't see a lot in the Diamond and Silk group.
That might have been, like, a bad group for this because Diamond and Silk, the people in that group think that they're in a group for two black women, so they get fucking wild.
They think they can say whatever the fuck they want in there.
That's one of the craziest groups that I'm part of.
But in other groups, no, everybody was like, no, fuck this cop, fuck this cop, fuck this cop.
The nicest comments were like, she's the one who gives cops a bad name, that sort of thing.
Uh, the very few detractors I saw were like old ladies who were like, she worked a 15 hour shift and she was tired and confused and I forget where I parked at the grocery store.
I totally understand this.
Honestly, has anybody asked the hard questions?
Like, was she on her period?
That's a different brand of comment, but yes.
That's definitely out there, isn't it?
Oh, gross.
That's totally out there.
Well, that's the misogyny we've been talking about.
But no, people were like, oh, she's just such a hard worker.
She just works so hard.
When you're a good employee, when you work hard, you're entitled to welfare when you get laid off.
You're also entitled to shoot people occasionally.
You've earned it at this point.
But no, that was like the sort of sympathetic response was like, oh, she worked a long shift.
Listen, I worked 17 hour shifts for months at a time.
Never shot anybody on my way home from work.
Not once.
But, I mean, this is also the same reason why, like, outside of my front door, I keep some chocolate and a pint of ice cream.
Just in case, you know, a moody lady cop comes up to the door.
Yeah.
God.
Uh, no, yeah, and I said, I replied to that comment, I was like, uh, I worked 17 hours plenty, or I can't remember what I said, I was like, I've never felt like shooting anyone after a 17 hour shift.
She's like, well, how many of them did you work?
And it's like, at that point, you're not going to get any more, but like literally months at a time.
I've never... Wait, you didn't like, send her all of your time cards?
No.
You should have.
Yeah, upsers.com actually makes that pretty easy.
I could have done that.
Go unions.
Yeah.
Next comment.
Okay.
These are long.
These are bulkier comments, so they're harder for Tony to read on the big screen.
But luckily you have technology on our side.
Yeah.
Oh, this is from Joe Crow 77, right?
Yep.
People got a little conspiracy on it.
People are really taking notes on this one.
Joe Crow 77 says...
Gene's family hired Crump the day after he was killed.
That's the lawyer, Benjamin Crump.
Exactly.
Benjamin Crump.
He's gained notoriety from actually doing a lot of these cases.
He started with Trayvon.
I think before Trayvon, you said he was representing somebody in 2006 or something.
Trayvon's been getting notoriety, but he's been doing these types of cases.
For a while now.
Everything from Trayvon Martin to Eric Garner, he's represented the families of a lot of these people.
He's made a huge impact.
The first time I saw him was representing Trayvon's family and I was thinking about what would my ironic racist or my ironic detractor joke be about him?
And I was thinking about the stereotype about lawyers Hack lawyers being ambulance chasers.
You know, like, they're chasing after, like, victims to, like, represent.
And, like, it's like, pfft, this guy's nothing but a cop car chaser.
I was like, wait, I don't think that works out in my... trying to do ironic.
Totally.
Totally.
It's too real.
It's too real, yeah.
It's, like, still not beneficial to my fake... Oh, you're just gonna show up everywhere cops kill people?
Yeah, actually, that's exactly what I'm doing.
So Gene's family hired Crump the day after he was killed.
What?
They got a lawyer the day after?
That's so fast.
They must not be hurting.
Crump reached out to them and promised to be in Dallas the next day with two eyewitnesses.
Where is that cited?
I don't know.
There's no evidence for that.
This is like some George Soros shit.
I put out an ad on Craigslist for two eyewitnesses.
Two paid actors is what he should have just said.
He has his family crying and carrying on to make the big bucks.
Now listen, I know that your son just was murdered for no reason, but I need you to fake cry.
Yeah, I know you're like normally pretty excited about the death and the family.
I know that you're really, you're not that broken apart about your son who had such a promising life to lead.
You know, I know you're not broken apart about this at all, but I need you to fake cry because we need to make those big bucks.
I hate it when people virtue signal by crying about their children's deaths.
But it's not going to get any worse, this comment.
If Gene hadn't been doped up on marijuana, sitting in a dark apartment with his door ajar, he would be alive today.
Actually, I feel like none of those things have been proved.
No one said he was high.
No one said he was just sitting in his dark apartment.
He might have been in bed, even?
Yeah, it was late.
I mean, I don't know how late it was, but the whole fucking Saab story about her is that she worked a 15 hour shift and she was tired and it was late.
What the fuck do you think he was doing?
And also, what kind of fucked up stoner just sits in a dark room?
That's not a thing.
And the thing is, like, toxicology on marijuana?
How long is that shit in your system?
A month?
Minimum.
Minimum.
There's gonna be no way- They're just gonna say he was high.
There's gonna be no way to, like, prove that he was sober during this encounter.
Yeah, you know who can't fake a piss test?
A corpse.
If he was ra- Oh god, I forget how fucking bad this comment gets.
Yeah, it's bad.
Uh, he would be alive today.
If he was raised to leave his door open for any burglar, I think someone let him down by not telling him about black burglars in the United States.
So the beautiful irony of this is that if he was warned about black burglars, maybe he would not have let this white cop kill him.
He probably had a sigh of relief when he thought he was going to see a black burglar and instead saw a white cop.
So wild.
Who's in my house?
Are you a black burglar?
Oh no wait, you're a white lady cop!
This is all going on his head because he hasn't said anything yet.
Oh wait, you're a white lady cop and I'm fucking dead.
How broken does your brain have to be to write this comment?
Yeah.
How both racist and broken do you have to be?
Like, if it weren't for black burglars Both of them, Gene, would still be a lot like, well, if it weren't for if it weren't for black crime, then cops wouldn't have a reason to exist.
And then they're like, that's the big brain theory.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Listen, we don't need cops.
It wasn't for you existing being black the whole time.
Well, and that was my fuck that.
Yeah, dude.
And that was my take, was like, you know, oh, if cops weren't overworked, if she didn't have to work 15 hours, then she wouldn't have been so, like, tired and disoriented when she came home.
And I agree.
I think we should get these hours down to a reasonable level of zero.
Nothing.
Just let these people live their lives without the burden of being a cop and see how many people they kill.
It'd be really nice.
Yeah.
Just give them a perpetual lunch break.
Oh, wait, hold on.
I don't know if you remember this, but even cops that aren't on duty, they just kill people anyways.
Oh, I think I heard that story somewhere.
Even when they're off work, even when they're wearing plainclothes, they get to call themselves plainclothes cops and kill people.
Which one was that?
Oh, the most recent one?
The one you're thinking of right now?
The one in Columbus, Ohio with the plainclothes cop who killed a sex worker who he had in his car, his on-mark vehicle, Basically, all we know is that a sex worker was picked up by somebody and then shot by somebody after they accosted them.
Turns out the person who happened to murder the sex worker was a cop.
So they get to call it like an investigation and it's so fucked.
Okay, well, uh, what does the sex worker have to say for themselves?
Unfortunately not a lot.
Yeah.
Pretty convenient.
It was even worse.
The passenger side door was against a wall.
The sex worker was trapped in the car.
Could not defend herself.
Yeah.
Hmm and maybe the maybe moving on to Possibly the most pertinent comment of this entire section 68 Simper Phi and I owe you one Says Neil Elipses.
Yeah, Neil dot dot dot dot.
It's not even an ellipse.
It's ellipses, period.
Yep, yep.
Ellipses, period!
I wish they spelled out period after the ellipses.
Neil.
Neil.
Pause.
Period!
Oh, were you saying Neil pause like you're not gay for kneeling?
Yeah.
Yeah, this is the final comment.
It just says Neil.
That's it.
Which I agree with.
I totally agree with this comment.
Yeah, we should all Neil out of... Yeah, seriously, we should all Neil for this.
But if you guys were wondering where this comment was coming from, their name is 68simperphi and their...
Their profile pic is the Marine crest, so I'm guessing that they're not for people kneeling for the flag.
But that's just me being, you know... Yeah, I mean, the odds are stacked against them.
They're in a Fox News comments section.
They're commenting on a super racist piece.
Likely, they're not in favor of kneeling.
But plenty of service members are okay with Colin Kaepernick kneeling, by the way.
The cool ones are, at least.
Not like I need their acceptance, but just saying.
Alright, so our second topic of the night is Hurricane Florence in North Carolina.
And just the amount of devastation that was inflicted on one store in North Carolina.
A family dollar that was just, oh my god, the carnage of looting a dollar store during a hurricane.
The tragedy.
The fallout was indeed felt in the Family Dollar.
We throw around the word Pulitzer a lot on this show, but just imagine capturing Capturing devastation like this on camera up close and like injecting yourself into the story like this where you just point a camera at poor people grabbing supplies from a family dollar and then yell at them.
Really getting in the shit?
And chase them with a microphone.
Yeah, if that doesn't qualify for a Pulitzer, I don't know what has.
I don't know.
Yeah.
So we have WECT Channel 6 News in North Carolina covering the ultra important story of not Hurricane Florence, but poor people grabbing water and juice from the Family Dollar across the street from their projects.
Let's go ahead and watch a little bit of this.
Looting the family dollar here on Greenfield Street.
Looks like people are coming out of the back edge.
Backside, right now.
It's happening right now.
That lame-ass run.
And her big hunter rain boots.
All right, they're coming out of the back side of the store here.
This is 13th and Greenfield.
We're gonna stay with this situation.
Oh cool, thank God.
Thank God somebody is.
Items in hand, guys.
Hey guys, you know you're looting, right?
You know you're stealing.
Yeah, I'm fucking thirsty.
Sir, you know you're looting, correct?
You know that you're looting and that's illegal?
You can see people coming out right now with items left and right from the store.
Just an invaluable service.
You know it's illegal, right?
Oh shit, wait, hold on, let me put this back.
I would love her take on somebody standing on a corner selling drugs.
Yep.
She'd go up to him, you know what you're doing is illegal, right?
This is news, this is journalism.
You should stop that.
Oh man, they were all, this shot exactly, they were all carrying things to hydrate themselves.
Everybody that was there was carrying, he had a 12 pack of coke, the other person had a case of water.
She came out with juice?
She came out with bottles of juice?
These are necessities when you don't have drinkable water.
Yeah.
That's what happens with hurricanes and floods.
You don't have drinkable water.
Also, you know, damage happens in general because of the weather.
And these stores, just anything that touched, any bottle that touched the floor gets thrown out.
Yeah, and it's all covered by insurance.
They all have this kind of insurance.
This lady sucks, dude.
Is there any more to this video?
Okay, so she's entering the family dollar.
Which is like breaking and entering as far as I'm concerned.
What she's doing is illegal.
Documenting a crime.
See if we can go back around front, guys.
A crime would have been taking that pallet jack.
That would have been a crime.
Oh no, you know some right-wing dude is like, I didn't see anyone stealing the pallet jack.
No one's trying to work around there.
I didn't see anyone grab that step ladder.
Nobody's trying to change their own light bulbs.
They get the government to do it.
Yep, yep.
Amazing how not one of those, not one of those looters was wearing a welder's mask.
Really surprising.
Yep.
Uh yeah so I love this lady like this is the news uh poor people are taking stuff that they need and she's like oh this is illegal you know you know you're you're wrong you know you're bad right you know you're bad oh there's more poor people back here look look there's more of them around the corner Uh this is like and this is like cool because it's like real like on the ground like gonzo journalism.
I feel like she's really like following the footsteps of Hunter S Thompson and like making her own experience part of the story.
Yeah.
And I'm just picturing her like getting super fucked up on like all a bunch of like basic white girl shit before she does this this thing like uh it was two hours into Hurricane Florence when uh the La Croix began to take hold.
It was two hours into Hurricane Florence and my essential oils diffuser was on full blast.
I'm picturing like her taking a rag and soaking it with essential oils and then just huffing it.
Just carrying around and smelling like the... I don't know what the... This is a mixture of almond and eucalyptus!
She's like taking the rag out of her pocket and just huffing chamomile or whatever.
In her mind these people were like velociraptors carrying the water.
That would make sense.
It's like, oh my God, there's demons everywhere.
Have you seen this?
When I first saw this video, I was hoping it was going to end in like a beautiful moment where somebody takes the camera from the cameraman.
Yeah.
I'll take that now.
That's how Don't Be A Menace would have ended the scene.
Hey, let me try that marmot jacket on.
Let me try that pink marmot jacket.
It's so insulting.
This pink marmot jacket, these rain hunter boots, all this fucking garb.
And these people are just wearing t-shirts.
So brave for being there though, you know.
In the shit.
I, uh, it's so funny to me when, like, normies, like, we're gonna get in all the normie responses and, well, the not-so-normie, the more deranged normie responses to this.
Uh, but, in Cali, hey, we got a different view about, uh, riots and looting.
Maybe listen to a little song called, uh, April 29th, 1992.
Uh, if you want a little education on how we view that shit on the West Coast.
Where do you think I got this sure mic that you're listening to today?
Dude, that fucking song.
That's a whole different episode.
I won't even touch it right now.
That's a good song.
That's their good song.
I want to get into it.
The song about how the Rodney King riots weren't about race?
Yeah, great song.
Okay.
It was about coming up and staying on top and screaming 1-8-7 at a motherfucking cop.
That's a line in the song.
It's how this was not about race.
That's a line in the song.
Okay, I don't vouch for that line.
That's a whole different episode on a whole different podcast.
Tune in next week.
Well, that's because Bradley Knowles is not black.
That's why that line's in there.
Exactly, he had to say it.
Okay, can we get into comments?
Let's get into comments.
Alright, Pat Triana Figueroa says, This is like a response to people who were rightfully pointing out, like, it's a hurricane.
People need fucking water.
People need supplies in a hurricane.
This store is like... Like, nobody's shopping.
Nobody's gonna be shopping from this store for a very long time.
Pat Triana Figueroa says, And the guy in front has two bottles of the detergent.
I suppose he's going to eat that?
That guy looked like a millennial, so I don't know what he's talking about.
Way too old to be eating Tide Pods.
The only thing that's essential to living is literal food.
Yeah.
I love the idea that detergent would be some sort of luxury item.
Like, oh, he's just stealing the detergent to take a big-ass bubble bath for fun.
Yeah, but how about like how it's... I wish he actually would harm himself.
Oh, actually, hold on.
I got some... No, we didn't get to that.
No, I got some breaking news right here.
Oh, yeah?
Fuck, dude.
Family in North Carolina drinks detergent in efforts to... ...cull the pain.
This is... this is not... this comment sucks now.
Okay.
Yeah, not funny anymore.
You got what you wanted, Pat.
Hope you feel good about yourself.
Well, I didn't even finish it.
He says, uh, suppose he's gonna eat that?
Actually, I wish he would.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
Yeah, that's alright.
Uh, yeah, no, no, no.
Wants him to die for stealing detergent to clean his fucking clothes.
Yeah.
Cool, dude.
Cool, Pat.
Or girl.
I don't know.
Who knows what gender Pat is?
There was a whole movie about that.
It's a mystery.
Lois Hawley says, ARREST THEM ALL!
I don't understand the stand back crap.
Because one of the plot points in this story was that the cops were not intervening.
At least at that time.
That's why things cost so much.
We have to pay for what the thugs steal.
That's why things at the Family Dollar cost so much.
So much.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You want a dollar for this?
A whole dollar.
I could have sworn this used to be 97 cents.
This is bullshit.
Well, I don't know if you knew this, but the thugs have been stealing lately, so inflation.
I love the idea that inflation, something that disproportionately harms poor people, is actually a result of poor people stealing stuff.
Hey, if you guys wouldn't be such criminals, maybe you could afford an apartment?
Yeah, right?
You know, like, come on, stop stealing so much stuff and then maybe you'll have some stuff.
Oh, that explains everything.
That's why I can't find a place to live right now.
It's because I keep stealing things.
Maybe you should steal an apartment.
Oh, that'd be cool.
Squat?
Yeah, you won't be arrested for at least three days.
Well, I mean, I live in Redland, so I would be shot immediately.
Right, I was doing the whole, you were the female cop.
It hasn't worked out as well for her, which is good.
Good, that's good.
I mean, we'll see.
It's still working out way better for her than it would ever for me.
Totally.
Just for showing up at the wrong apartment.
Jeanette Watley-Hale says, Where's the police?
What a disgrace.
Just go and take what they want with no regards to the owner of the store.
Sorry this keeps happening in such a time of need.
Such a time people other people needed that store to be closed.
Arrest them all.
It's people like this that gives black people a bad name.
Sorry to the rest of the blacks that don't deserve this right now.
God.
Listen, Blacks, I know you're hurting right now, and I really wish the other Blacks would stop doing this to you.
Sorry, Blacks.
Listen, I'm so sorry, Blacks.
We gotta be racist now because of these other Blacks.
We're gonna be racist against you, and it's not your fault.
It's those Blacks' fault.
But, but the thing is, like, We've been told exactly that.
I've been told exactly that.
I don't hate you.
I don't hate you.
It's the other blacks.
It's the idea of you.
Exactly.
It's the rap dancing blacks that make me upset.
Yeah, this comment was all fucking over every one of these posts.
Oh, I wonder why we profile them.
The literal, like, dozen people that were on camera doing this thing that's not bad, in my mind.
Yeah, I'm good with it.
B, in a black neighborhood, who the fuck do you think the people in this neighborhood are gonna look like?
Yeah.
You know anything about demographics and drawing lines in communities?
I was just having this conversation with somebody about statistics and how general education in college, like upper division general education, some people think it's a waste of time or whatever, but it helps you develop critical thinking skills and such, and we specifically were talking about statistics.
And how, like, the human brain is, you know, in all our cries of logic and thinking clearly without emotion and using your brain, your brain is, like, specifically wired to misinterpret the world, like, evolutionarily, especially when it comes to statistics.
It's a very, sort of, what's the word, like, counterintuitive thing, where you're literally evolutionarily designed to see, like, Black people in this neighborhood and think like extrapolate that into that's something you have to fight.
We're designed to embrace the exception.
We're designed to embrace the exception of the rule as the rule.
Yeah.
Because that's what we see.
You're like, you're only designed to understand the existence of like 200 people at a time.
And so when you see 12 people on screen doing something that's supposedly bad, you're like, wow, that's 12% of the entire population doing that thing.
Exactly.
The people who see this every day, see black people every day, see 100 black people in their media streams or whatever, but they see a small segment of those black people doing something wild. but they see a small segment of those black people Not wild at all, but it's perceived as such.
And that's what they assign to everything.
So you see, your whole day you're like, you're like dancing to Beyonce, you're like loving Drake, you're watching football and basketball games.
But then you see some people getting water for free from a store during a time of need.
Which should already be free, should always be free.
And you're like, animals.
Yeah.
Animals, all of them.
This is why I'm racist!
This is why, I have a reason to be racist.
Yeah, that was the comment.
People just openly sent with thousands of likes on this local news affiliate's post.
Let me just go to the top comment right here on the post.
I didn't get it ahead of time because it was boring.
And they wonder why they are profiled the way they are.
Hmm.
15,000 reacts.
Like, angry, and love.
Those are the majority reacts.
Yeah.
Lots of vitriolic racism that we're not going to read from this comment, including learning new slurs.
I learned, I genuinely learned new slurs.
I learned new slurs.
I thought that they were getting a slur wrong.
Turns out they've just been using that the entire time on the internet.
Yeah, and now I have really fucked up search history on Google.
Randy Klein says, in all caps, LOOTERS LIKE PRIVATE PROPERTY TRESPASSERS WILL BE SHOT ON SIGHT.
NO PROBLEM.
ILLEGAL INVADERS.
TRESPASSERS.
SHOT DEAD IN THE HEAD.
CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEM.
I like that a lot.
I like that comment.
Particularly because they end it with the thesis statement.
Like, this is how the criminal justice system should be.
It's how it is a lot of the time.
People just get shot in the head.
Suspects.
Yeah, well-rounded comment.
This is just... What if...
This is how it was.
So people try to loot, right?
And then the cop showed up and just blew him away.
Would Randy Klein be in there being like, great job, nailed it.
This is what we wanted.
Yeah, I don't know.
That's a good quote.
Yeah.
Randy would be like, shoot more!
Keep doing it!
Wait, you didn't do headshots to everybody.
You think he's just a naysayer?
You think he's a little troll?
Wait, I think that you're assigning an interesting gender to Randy because of the name.
I think if you look at that picture, that's a lady.
I think it's a guy.
I think it's a guy who looks like they're in Dazed and Confused.
Oh, dang.
I think it's a guy who's deciding whether to stick with the basketball team or pursue the hobby of smoking weed.
Oh, man.
Remember that one time when I was, like, trying to, like, call you out for being, like, uh, heteronormative and then in turn I ended up doing it myself?
Yeah, dude.
Today we learned something.
Well, remember that movie It's Randy?
Nope.
That like predicted this whole confusion.
It's a Pat joke.
Okay.
Joshua Melvin.
No confusion about this name.
We can tell that Joshua is a male name.
Also white.
White.
Joshua Melvin.
Very cool last name.
Melvin.
They should get double the charges for looting during a time of crisis.
Yep.
Big brain take, right here.
Ooh, shouldn't have done that during a hurricane!
Damn!
That's when people need stuff the most!
Sorry, yeah, what the fuck is that?
Yeah.
Yeah, no.
Well, I think I just figured it out because thanks to capitalism, the system under which we currently live, crises provide an invaluable opportunity to raise prices.
That's not wrong.
So that water is worth twice as much to the store owner, to the business owner during a crisis.
So when you steal it, you're stealing twice as much out of that owner's pocket.
So although they were stealing from the dollar store, They're walking out with items, and Josh is saying, let's see here, we got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, that's 7 items, that's $14 worth of damage to the dollar store.
$14, twice as much.
Yeah, $14, people don't know, that is actually a felony.
Like, once it gets over $13, $14 becomes a felony.
- Over $13, $14 becomes a felony. - We haven't even worked in the tax. - No, that's definitely what Joshua Melvin means.
I couldn't figure it out at first.
I was like, what the fuck is this stupid person saying?
No, totally.
Yeah, that was worth more to Dollar... Supply and Demand!
So the third rung in this ladder of, well it's a ladder but we're going down.
It's a negative ladder.
The third item in this episode is the Wilmington, North Carolina Police Department posting about this incident on Facebook.
Which I love.
I love when we get actual Facebook news.
You know, not like, oh, this local news affiliate with actual cameras and, like, a microphone and stuff.
We're reporting on Facebook.
I like it when just, like, people are posting and, like, that's the news.
Wilming, this police department, says, News alert!
We're aware of the looting occurring at the Family Dollar Store on 13th and Greenfield Streets.
Unfortunately, store management has asked us not to intervene at this time.
We have the live feed and are monitoring the situation.
Thank you for your calls and posts.
So, a lot going on in this post.
I love the unfortunately, which you highlighted when you sent me the tweet version of this post.
It's, it's... Now, this police department should be like, I'm sorry we couldn't have been there at the dollar store to help distribute the water and goods.
That's what it should have said.
Yes!
Unfortunately, we could not help the people.
But it's like, instead we could not crack skulls.
Yeah, no, unfortunately we couldn't arrest thirsty poor people.
Um... I also like, uh...
Store management has asked us not to intervene at this time, so they didn't.
Yeah.
That's an interesting facet of this.
That's a really illuminating aspect of this.
No, the police, they work for us.
They work for us, the citizens, except when store owners, business people, give direct orders to the cops to tell them how to behave.
I wonder what that says about our judicial system.
It's interesting, for sure.
I wonder if that's just like reaffirming the 25-year-old Simpsons quote that Lisa says to Marge when she becomes a cop.
Aren't police just the foot soldiers of capitalism?
I mean, maybe.
Yes.
And then Marge grabs a McGruff the Crime Dog hand puppet and distracts Lisa with it.
And then hits her at the club.
Yeah.
No, Marge was one of the good ones, that's why she had to quit.
Oh, true, true.
Marge is literally a good cop because she fucking quit.
Yep, that's the only way to be a good cop, is to quit.
Retired at cop.
Yeah.
Okay.
Thank you for your calls and posts.
Thank you for tattling.
Thank you for all the posts you've been doing about the scary people you saw.
Like, where were they seeing?
They were probably seeing that on that local affiliate and they were like posting.
They were like posting on the Wilmington North Carolina Police Department's Facebook page.
They were like in their next door app, you know, they were like, oh, urgent.
Urgent!
People getting away with free goods!
By the way, if you have the Nextdoor app and you're not just a troll, go fuck yourself.
Just saying.
A-N-A-B?
Yeah.
Jason Anderson says, in response, so this is a post about how the cops are not going to intervene because the store owners asked them not to, which I guess we should say is, like, cool?
Yeah.
For a store owner?
It's not necessarily woke or anything.
It's just logical.
It's not malicious.
It's not worth the paperwork to them.
Insurance is covering all the products.
Insurance is already covering it.
I wish they would have gone about it.
I wish they would have gone about it a different way.
They should have tweeted, the family dollar in this area will be donating all of its products on the shelves to the local community at this time.
Totally.
First come, first serve.
That's the big brain take right there.
By the way, I am for hire still.
If you guys need me, you know where to find me.
Fuck, dude.
I don't think we can afford to lose you at Main Death Club with those PR skills.
I got my priorities correct, don't worry.
What was I gonna say?
Yeah, somebody in the Street Fighters Facebook group was like, This is just good business.
They don't want the cops to shoot potential clients.
Totally.
These are the people from the neighborhood.
These are my consumers.
This is who comes here.
Jason Anderson says, to these cops who have the audacity to let criminals free with their water.
Jason Anderson, on this post, in reply to the cops, Am I allowed?
Can I do this one?
Hold on real quick.
Quick disclaimer.
Quick disclaimer.
We are going to say a word that we hate.
But we're going to say the word, quoting somebody else, calling somebody we hate more than the word, that word.
I don't want to say it.
Okay, we can say the word.
It's funnier if I say it, but I don't want to say it.
We love people too much.
We love people more than we hate cops, and we really hate cops.
So let's go for that.
Maybe if I don't say it in anger the way he's saying it.
He calls the cops retards.
Yeah, yeah, yep.
We're in a state of emergency, you f- you fucking R-words.
And fucking is, yeah, censored.
It's F, asterisk, asterisk, etc.
We're in a state of emergency, you fucking R-words.
They are looting.
Doesn't matter what the store manager says, you fucking idiots.
I just like the part where they, yeah, they're calling cops idiots, in our words here.
For not being violent enough.
Yeah.
Calling the cops cucks.
Yeah.
For not bashing skulls in.
This is white privilege, folks.
Yeah.
Imagine getting up at a cop's face for not arresting the looters.
You should've tried harder!
Why didn't you, why didn't you not, why is there not blood?
We need blood.
I love this.
Calling the cops the R word.
Because they're not authoritarian enough.
Like I said, I dream to have the confidence of a white man one day.
Of a conservative white man.
I want that confidence.
If you guys can give me a pill that would give me that, I'll take it.
Yeah, it's called... The red pill?
Yeah.
I was gonna do a Viagra joke.
Or like a Cialis, one of those.
I co-signed both of those things, they're pretty cool.
If you guys ever get the resource and have a weekend with a loved one, go for it.
It's a good time.
Ken Gunnett says, If this happened where I lived, I would do an 8 hour shift inside the store with a shotgun.
Yep.
Okay.
There's a hurricane in your town, in your community.
People are low on water, other supplies, and you're going to defend the merchandise of a family dollar with your life and your shotgun.
I like the idea of them leaving their family.
Sorry babe, I have to go do what's right.
This is bigger than us, you understand that right?
I love you, but we have to defend the family dollar.
This dude is just like, he's like the close range version of American Sniper.
The close range version?
Yeah, you have the shotgun so it spreads, you know.
The buckshot version of American Sniper.
American Sawed-Off.
Can you come a little closer?
I don't want to miss.
I don't want to damage any product.
I have over 2,000 confirmed kills.
Yes, they were from within a one foot distance.
All knife kills.
Wow, hey.
Yeah, if this happened where I live, I would do an eight-hour shift.
Like, forget the whole killing, forget the whole, like, threatening people, uh, potentially losing your own life.
Just the idea that you would spend eight unpaid hours doing anything to help a department store.
You're fucking insane.
What's wrong with you?
What's wrong with you?
The store doesn't even care, dude!
No, but if this really happened, Ken would hit him with the invoice.
You don't have to pay it, but here it is.
No, he would do it out of the derangement of his own heart.
No, he would go into that same dollar store and be like, do you offer a military discount?
We do, sir.
Are you in the military?
No, but I did defend this store during a time of need.
They'll never sing songs about me.
Basically the National Guard.
No, this is that same guy that we had who volunteered to keep Sandy Hook safe.
And he was gonna bring his own bullets.
I will provide my own bullets!
He said that because he makes them.
That's a cheap way to do it.
It's also untraceable.
Manfred Mueller, who had a really good band in the 70s that covered a Bruce Springsteen song and got much more fame than Bruce Springsteen ever did by that, says, and I'll be covering year six.
Also be covering Blinded by the Light.
Because when herds of animals are storming in, you need help.
Fuck.
Fuck.
When herds of animals... This is not like that scene in the dystopian movie when like... This is not the scene from Jumanji when a herd of animals is storming through the neighborhood.
This is just people trying to get fucking water.
You're also mixing your metaphors because like when you say animals like I'm assuming you mean like predatory animals like thugs and which don't... They're not like a herd animal.
That's true.
You see a pack of bears, you're fucked.
Yeah, you're kind of fucking stupid, dude.
Yeah, and I'll be covering your sex!
That's my favorite shit.
When, like, regular-ass people want to use, like, military terms, it's my favorite shit.
At work, we have, like, we have people go to the iPad and write down item numbers, and they come back and tell me item numbers, and I'll get the item for them.
People will come up and be like, um, uh, yes, I need item number, uh, Rambo!
Alpha!
Charlie!
And I'm like, what the fuck are you saying, dude?
Just say the letter, dude.
All the time.
If they get to say Alpha, they're so stoked.
Oh, yeah.
Can I get a Charlie Alpha Sixer?
And then you look at them and you're like, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.
Which, by the way, I did enjoy that movie.
Oh, is it good?
Yeah, it's actually pretty good.
Shout out Tina Fey.
I like that Whiskey gets to be one.
That's kind of cool.
Yeah.
That's like the coolest one, right?
Yeah, I think so.
Yeah.
Like, Foxtrot is like a stupid dance.
Foxtrot is like a stupid hokey dance from the 30s.
Hey, listen.
Listen.
No, no.
The Foxtrot... So is the Tango!
The Foxtrot... Are they all dances?
They used to be dances of rebellion.
That's my white side speaking right there, if that wasn't clear.
Okay.
We used to Foxtrot right in their fucking faces.
Uh, Bravo.
That's a defeminate one too.
Whiskey, Tanko, Bravo, Encore!
Entertainment!
The military just loves show business, like I didn't even realize.
They're all doing like show hands like the whole time.
The S is for Showtime!
It's for Shine!
This is weird.
This is something we're gonna have to delve further into, I think.
Jazz!
Sorry, huh?
Yeah.
And I'll be covering your sit- You watch the detergent!
I'll be watching the- the sponges!
Just fucking nonsense.
Just pig brain people, dude.
Carolyn Johansson-Wood, and I think this is her last comment.
Carol, sorry.
Carol Johansson-Wood says, Who cares what the owner says?
Fucking 11 exclamation points.
All caps.
NEVER STAND DOWN!
All 11 exclamation points again.
So many.
OMG!
Only two exclamation points.
Police, DO NOT STAND DOWN!
Four exclamation points.
Arrest them!
Ellipses, period.
ALL OF THEM!
Ellipses, two-thirds of an ellipses.
So for some reason, I read the entire Caps part as like, gang vocals in a hardcore song?
Yeah, dude.
Couldn't start to never stand down?
NEVER BACK DOWN!
NEVER STAND DOWN!
OH MY GOD!
JUST LET THOSE FUCKING BASTARDS LOOT THEMSELVES IN!
Shoot him in the head!
My dollar, my pride!
Dollar!
dollar family hey listen if you're not dollar now you would never dollar Uh, yeah.
And I just love that, like, no, this is a Benghazi thing.
This is like a total, I love this shit, man.
I don't know if like this is apparent to the listener or if it's just us because we've been inundated with this shit.
This is Benghazi.
Never stand down.
The manager gave the stand down order and that's why I'm not voting for them for president.
Yeah, yeah.
Never stand down.
OMG.
It's happening again.
It's all happening again.
Remember that one episode of The Office where Michael Scott was all staying down, but Jim was all like, no way, I'm killing all of them.
And then he pulled his assault rifle out of the jello mold that he had left on Dwight's desk for a joke.
Hey, but RIP Dwight.
They took Dwight out with that one.
God, it was really crazy how they just blasted those pictures of Dwight's corpse all over the internet.
Yeah, no, I love this.
Arrest him before Benghazi happens again!
We should have learned the first time.
Oh boy, what an episode.
Alright, that's it.
Thank you so much for listening, folks.
Thank you for watching.
If you're on YouTube, remember to please like, subscribe.
Go to YouTube right now and subscribe, even if you're not going to watch.
We need a hundred.
We need six more.
Six more listeners to go to YouTube and subscribe, and then we can get our own URL, which helps us.
Also, a bit of an announcement.
I'm going on vacation for two weeks because my job is, like, really bad and it sucks and I need a break before we enter peak season, which is coming up, and I'll be working those 14-hour days that, you know, justify murder, apparently.
Which makes me really nervous, but I'm still gonna show up.
Yeah, well, um... I just hope I don't beat you to your house.
I'll just leave my door ajar, so you know.
I was gonna say something about the door being ajar earlier.
I don't remember.
You can't, because Tony.
You can't let Tony out.
That's true.
Ergies.
Yeah, so for the next two weeks, we're probably gonna do, like, special stuff for the main feed listeners.
We'll maybe release some older Patreon episodes.
No Patreon episodes for these two weeks.
Sorry, folks.
But, yeah.
Daddy needs his vacation time.
If you enjoy the show, please rate and review in your podcast app, your iPhone.
We would greatly appreciate it.
It helps us look good.
Thank you to everybody who's already done so.
As always, you can listen to the show at MinionDeathCult.com.
We have that domain.
And, at that domain, you can also pre-order the shirts, which we are printing this week.
We're getting the graphics sent off to the printer this week, tomorrow.
If you're listening on Monday, today, when you're hearing this now, today, please let us know.
Do a pre-order.
If you have a size you think we need to print, holler at us.
Please pre-order.
It's going to help us be efficient and get you the right shirt you guys want.
It's going to be a really limited run.
We're talking like 25 of these shirts.
We're talking really prized, really like Grail-level shit.
These are awesome shirts though.
You can see them at MinionDeathCult.com.
They feature a blue star boy that we haven't covered audibly on the show yet, but boy is he a sight to behold.
Exceptional.
Yeah, Tony made these graphics.
They fucking rule.
The front is somebody's actual likeness, so don't tag that person or they'll sue us.
