| Time | Text |
|---|---|
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The Best Story Today
00:07:57
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|
| Out and about. | |
| Rather than me wasting my time staring at you and invariably getting the wrong side of the camera. | |
| Let me invert. | |
| Let's go back. | |
| There we go. | |
| That's what you want. | |
| I'm on my way to record a piece that I do every week with the former governor of New York. | |
| David Patterson, a fine, fine chap. | |
| And I figured, rather than take another lift in, I figure I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to drive about or walk about and tell you what's on my mind. | |
| The best story today that I can explain to you, the best story is this fellow that they caught, this illegal... | |
| And what he was doing with a cadaver. | |
| Uh-oh, look at that. | |
| There's a traffic guy. | |
| Used to call him the Brownies years ago. | |
| Anyway, I can't tell you in fear of the algorithms that I'll be a force to deal with, but I can't say it. | |
| Just go to New York Post, nypost.com, Read what this illegal did to a corpse on a subway. | |
| You're not going to believe it. | |
| I can't say it. | |
| This morning I was on ABC and we were talking up a storm. | |
| Talking up a storm. | |
| Mentioning it in all of its glory. | |
| I almost said by the by, but I won't. | |
| Do you remember, have you ever watched Rick Beato? | |
| Rick Beato. | |
| Rick Beato has recorded from here so many times. | |
| This is the power station. | |
| The famous power station. | |
| Where he has recorded with all of the... | |
| Various luminary sting. | |
| Anyway, he does a great job. | |
| It's right here in the hood. | |
| So going back to what I was saying, the story is so horrible. | |
| I can't tell you. | |
| This is the part about YouTube that drives me crazy. | |
| This is a story. | |
| I'm not waxing salacious. | |
| I'm trying to explain what happened. | |
| And I can't. | |
| Because of the algorithms. | |
| That's the part which if I... | |
| Good morning, sir. | |
| Good morning. | |
| I'm very nice to people. | |
| I'm very nice. | |
| This is the world of New York scaffolding, by the way. | |
| If you want to make money, go into scaffolding. | |
| Everything is scaffolded for reasons I shan't understand. | |
| Anyway, ah, Liz Solak. | |
| No, Liz, they didn't bring it on the subway. | |
| This man apparently expired. | |
| Liz, conjuring ideas of lugging some stiff on your, over your shoulder. | |
| No, Liz, he met his maker on one train. | |
| Let me see if I can say this. | |
| He was the subject of a rather demented form of affection by another patron who was, you guessed it, an illegal alien. | |
| Huh? | |
| Isn't that great? | |
| So, read the story. | |
| You can't... | |
| Believe what he did. | |
| You can't. | |
| There's just no, there are no words. | |
| No words to put it into effect what happened. | |
| By the by, I think I got my 5G taken care of. | |
| Are you noticing a better quality of upload? | |
| Wonderful pizza joint, by the way, Norma. | |
| This is a Sicilian pizza joint. | |
| Very, very nice. | |
| I told you I called up my carrier, and my antenna wasn't working. | |
| I couldn't access 5G. | |
| Now, let me warn you, I'm not looking in my rangefinder, so I could be filming the ground for all I know. | |
| But you'll get used to it. | |
| Let me see, how am I doing? | |
| It's not too bad. | |
| 144 people. | |
| Guess what this place serves. | |
| Guess. | |
| That's right. | |
| Sushi. | |
| How's everyone today? | |
| Everybody good? | |
| Come on, let's do a check-in. | |
| Who's in? | |
| With a roll call. | |
| Where's everybody from? | |
| Give me an idea where you're from. | |
| Preferably city and state. | |
| That Ohio stuff doesn't do much for me. | |
| I love the variability of where people are from. | |
| I appreciate that immensely. | |
| It's still pretty fascinating to me. | |
| Look at this. | |
| Here they come. | |
| There we go. | |
| Can't read the trolls. | |
| I'll let you folks take care of that for me. | |
| It's a place called Lumiere, which in French means the cattle are dying. | |
| Big plans this weekend, my friends? | |
| I'm in that weird form of a weird state. | |
| I told you last night. | |
| Maybe I didn't. | |
| I don't eat at night. | |
| I have a... | |
| I eat in the morning. | |
| And maybe noon at the latest, I call it quits until the next morning. | |
| They call it intermittent fasting, but I don't like that name. | |
| I like the 18-6. | |
| You wait for six hours and just fast for 18. It's not even fasting, it's just called not eating. | |
| Here's a question for you. | |
| When you give up meat, What do you call that? | |
| Do you call it sobriety? | |
| And you say, like, when was your last drink? | |
| You know, I've been sober for... | |
| What do you call it when you give up something, like, say, meat or dairy? | |
| What do you call that? | |
| Talk amongst yourself. | |
| This is the Center for Justice Innovation. | |
|
NYPD Stars at Studio 54
00:05:04
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|
| I have no idea what the hell that even means. | |
| It's a nice little courtyard. | |
| Always. | |
| Always working. | |
| The company, the moving company, I'm just telling you that I love. | |
| I don't know if you have them in your neck of the woods. | |
| Piece of cake. | |
| We had to move somebody at the time. | |
| They are everywhere. | |
| Everywhere. | |
| Great, great group of people. | |
| Great customer service. | |
| I'm not getting anything from this, but they are all over the place. | |
| all over the place. | |
| This is where Jerry Orbach used to live. | |
| Remember him from NYPD? | |
| Not NYPD. | |
| No, what was it? | |
| What was that show he was on? | |
| NYPD Blue, I think. | |
| This is Jerry Orbach. | |
| Way. | |
| You see that right there? | |
| He was, uh... | |
| Can you read that? | |
| What was the show he was on? | |
| With, uh... | |
| Look at this. | |
| See this? | |
| This is what will kill you. | |
| If you come to New York... | |
| I swear. | |
| Look at this. | |
| See this? | |
| This is what will kill you. | |
| These e-bikes. | |
| Cross the Gate Avenue, ladies and gentlemen. | |
| We're going to be going up a dink past the Letterman building. | |
| Coming up. | |
| Eventually, I guess. | |
| What show was he on? | |
| I'm looking. | |
| Who was the Jerry Orbach show? | |
| With Christopher Noth. | |
| Not NYPD Blue, was it? | |
| No. | |
| When was it? | |
| Somebody help me. | |
| A little sleep deprived. | |
| So if I maunder... | |
| Studio 54, the original, is one street over. | |
| Did you know that? | |
| The Studio 54. In fact, this, I think, might have been the back door of Studio 54. Coming up, it's Letterman, or what used to be called Letterman. | |
| This was Roseland. | |
| You probably don't remember that one, but that was it. | |
| A groovy place. | |
| When Letterman always had the guests come in the side door, it was right over here. | |
| Anybody watch Colbert? | |
| Anybody even care about that? | |
| This was where all the action appeared. | |
| This is the side, the back door of the Ed Sullivan Theater. | |
| Hello Deli is up here. | |
| Remember that dude Rupert? | |
| Remember Rupert? | |
| Wasn't that fun? | |
| Letterman was really something when he started. | |
| See the Asians? | |
| Always with the masks. | |
| Maybe they know something. | |
| Maybe they know something. | |
| I'm a few blocks away from the garden. | |
| There you go. | |
| This is where they used to come in. | |
| Here's Hello Deli. | |
| This is where... | |
| Look at this grand opening special. | |
| How can you have a grand opening special of a place that's been there forever? | |
| I guess he's not there anymore. | |
| Anybody know the correct pronunciation of Asaya? | |
| I bumped into Epstein at Studio 54. He was quite the bon vivant. | |
| I was on with my friend Curtis Lee this morning and Curtis was asking yet again about the files. | |
| I've given up telling people we don't care about the files. | |
| There's the late show with the Colbert, huh? | |
| Angela's Pizza is very good. | |
| Let me go this way. | |
| Down here, Broadway. | |
| Can you see where the falls? | |
| Now, you see here how the street, you have pedestrian, you have, here's shitty bikes, which I despise. | |
| So you've got bikes, pedestrians, taking up valuable, driving real estate. | |
|
Lionel Nation Update
00:00:35
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|
| The subway, my friends. | |
| Pret a manger. | |
| Here's the subway, my friends. | |
| This is the... | |
| This is the 7th Avenue station, the BD&E, uptown and downtown. | |
| I have not been on a subway in years. | |
| Here's something a lot of my Lionel Nation members will know. | |
| Here's the short bus. | |
| By the way, this goes out to my sister who will be watching later tonight. | |