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Sept. 22, 2023 - Lionel Nation
01:01:51
The End of Everything
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And this is the second attempt at this evening's live attempt.
And today it's been one of those days.
My apologies, dear friend.
I love, I gotta tell you something, I love doing a show when there appears to be something wrong, something going wrong with the, I don't know, and people will write in, ah, you might want to restart your computer.
You might want to, I think it's the Fisteris or the Gaben.
I think it's the Gaben.
The Gaben could be the Bifusual.
I think the Bifusual is acting up, and I think, you know what, kid, did you restart it?
Why don't you restart it?
I think it's an axe.
Are you doing coax?
Are you on Ethernet or Wi-Fi?
There is nothing.
I'm pretty good at this.
I can take a look at this one and give it a run through.
In any event, I hope everyone is back.
I hope you are back.
I hope all of us are back.
I don't even know where to begin today.
I just want to vent.
I just want to vent with you.
And I want to first make, because now I'm paranoid, I hope to God everybody's back.
Are you back?
Are we back?
Ladies, there we go.
Update your drivers.
Clear the caches.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Laura Floyd's there.
Tony Garrett.
Come on, everybody.
Get off your duff and let's go, go, go, go.
While we begin, I got to tell you something.
Mrs. L and I went to our grocery store.
Why do people say grocery?
Why do people say grosh?
G-R-O-S-H.
Grocery.
Grocery.
Washington.
Wash the car.
In any way.
*sniff*
So we want to get our stuff.
Have to buy our comestibles.
And first of all, I hate people who bring in dogs to the store.
How many people hate people bringing in dogs?
It's almost as much as I hate to see pictures of Fetterman.
Walking around in his beach gear.
You have no idea the internal rage I feel.
You have no idea.
Things.
If there was some type of plethysmograph or something I could connect, you have no...
When I see that, I lose my mind.
Okay?
I lose my mind.
Second of all, we're in the store.
A woman's got a dog.
She's at the grocery store.
There's food.
There's food.
Yes, Dick Fork, everything is over.
Hang on a minute.
And then, standing in front of us, there's a woman in a wheelchair and she's got a mask on.
Okay?
She's got a mask and she's in a wheelchair.
And I want so much to say, what?
I wish I could take the mask sometimes, pull it back as far as I can and then let her go.
Pow!
And say, what do you think is happening?
Why are you wearing a mask?
You're demented.
You're not going to get any...
What is the matter of you?
But she's in a wheelchair.
And you figure, okay.
All right.
What are you going to do?
And she's a pain in the ass.
She was letting people go.
I thought she was looking at the frozen foods.
So we go around and go, hey!
I'm waiting.
I'm in line.
I say, why are you waiting?
Why are you waiting 100 feet?
COVID's over!
Remember the old days you would wait so far?
Next!
You'd go to the guy with the plastic.
Remember the guy at the checkout?
He'd have that plastic thing and say, hello!
How are you?
COVID's here!
And you would wait forever.
Alright, next customer.
Customer, next, next, next guest.
They give you these euphemisms for what you are.
Basically, you're just a rube.
And I thought this woman, she's like, what are you standing so far away from me?
I thought you were looking at...
I'm waiting.
You're a pain in the ass.
So anyway, the good news is, sort of, she runs over the dog's foot in front of her with a wheelchair.
Now, why?
I can't...
She was a nightmare.
She was like just a bitch.
But she's in a wheelchair.
Now, am I supposed to like her because she's in a wheelchair?
Am I supposed to say, oh, you're a nice person?
No, you're a bitch!
Remind me of the flashbacks.
These flashbacks of the COVID days.
Remember, you have to wait so far?
And you would think, there was this...
I remember a couple of times, you go, hey, there's nobody here.
Oh, no, no, no.
They're around the corner.
They're all the way in the back.
All the way in the back.
In any event.
So food store shopping, I love.
It's one of these incredibly great, wonderful people.
I love to go to little places.
I like to go to places where there's like Wonderful.
Why have I said this?
See, I am not a xenophobe.
I'm a xenophile.
There's a place not too far from us.
It's a little bodega.
It's called United We Stand.
Flags.
Red, white, and blue.
I don't know where they're from.
I could be.
I have no idea.
Jordan?
Who knows?
But united we stand.
I love this place.
And they try so hard to have a little thing where you can get the...
You know what a cheese, a chopped cheese is?
And they have all these little things that people get, these New York delicacies.
And I love that.
I just whole love the...
I love the experience.
Went to a CVS, reeked of weed.
Absolutely...
Reeked of weed inside.
Then you go into CVS and you got the guy who says hello to you.
Excuse me, what was that?
It's not a guy who's ever said hello to anybody in his life.
But they make them do that.
But Mrs. L, she is the coupon queen.
Put her this.
Put this in.
And I'm like the dog.
Alright?
Use this.
I got him on my...
Put in my number.
Put the card.
Okay.
And all of a sudden, it comes off like you cannot believe.
Then, in the pharmacy section, it looks like the UN.
Headscarves and things I've never seen before.
Hats, veils, a spear.
I'm kidding.
It's like, what is this?
Weed and...
Doctari or something.
It looks like Scheherazade.
And then they have a list of all of the languages.
If you need help, if you need help, and you speak Malaysian, Burmese, they have a list of all of these languages.
And they will get somebody to come assist you.
And I'm thinking to myself, now?
Next week, let's say you want to buy some rectal itch cream.
Rectal itch cream is, remember that it was, what was it, Tegrin years ago?
I think it was, I remember this thing called rectal itch.
I thought it was like, wow, this must be, out of all the particular, not just lana cane, but rectal itch.
Here's one for you, friends.
Are you getting older?
I love the names of stuff.
Listen to this.
When you get older, one day you wake up and you see, what is this stuff?
And you look and you see to yourself, ah, and you say, all of a sudden, when you get older, you get these lines here.
See those two lines?
Who has those?
Anybody?
Tux, pre-moisten, pal, look at Liz, Preparation H. Preparation H, by the way, Used to actually be good on eyes because it was vasoconstrictive for people with puffy eyes.
Anyway, you know when you get older, you get these lines.
Who's got those lines?
Isn't Ben Gay for rectal itch?
I don't think so.
I don't think that's a good idea to be using any kind of perianal, something with eucalyptus.
Anyway, these things here, these two lines.
See these things when you get older?
You know what those things are called?
Chicken, knack, whatever.
But it's not a double chin, it's this.
In most individuals, the thin midline cervical fascia tends to attenuate with age.
This explains the fascial dehiscence of the platysma.
Platysmal dehiscence on each side of the midline.
And the platysma The platysma, rather, is this neck area, this weird muscle that actually is underneath the skin that is used, and horses use it to get rid of flies.
Anyway, all mammals have this.
But isn't that great?
Platysmal dehiscence, this attenuation from the fascia where the muscle stretches apart.
Isn't that something?
Just want to tell you.
Because when you get older, you go, what is that?
And everything you saw.
I like bingo wings.
Some people have that.
Sometimes it's just one of those things.
Be ready, dear friends.
But platysmal dehiscence.
Okay.
Just want to let you know.
Listen, I got no problem with the age thing.
Just so that you know this.
Just so that you understand it.
I'm very, very, very...
I don't feel at all at any kind of senescence like Joe Biden, but I do like what's going on.
I do like, for example, remember when you were a kid, remember how some kids' faces, they were covered in acne and oily, the sebaceous?
It was just, that wasn't age with anything.
I'm not going to talk about this anymore.
Platysmal dehiscence, there will be a test.
Now, something is happening, and Joe Biden is so bad today.
Did you hear him give the same speech twice about...
Where was it?
Not Lawrenceville.
Where was his...
He gave this speech...
About how he got, why he ran because of Trump and the Nazis and somebody said, Dad, you gotta do something!
A cop.
Where was the number?
Pop.
Right.
Bo has a son named Hunter?
There's two hunters?
There's the uncle of the Hunter and the nephew of the Hunter.
It's weird.
But what is it?
Not Lawrenceville, Fayetteville, the name of the play.
Anyway, the point is, irrespective.
Huh?
Right.
The thing is, he does it, tells the story, and tells it again immediately.
Not five seconds later.
Did you ever talk about to a drunk?
You know how drunks repeat themselves?
This is like immediately.
And people are thinking, holy shit.
My gosh, this is worse than ever!
And Camille Jean-Pierre is doubling down on the Peter Ducey.
Well, why does he go, I don't want to talk about this?
What do you mean you don't want to talk about this?
They're coming, was it 10,000 across the border?
They have razor wire they're cutting?
Don't cut the razor wire!
I'm going crazy.
I'm thinking alligators?
This is...
Terrible.
I'm thinking things.
You've got to understand something.
What is happening?
It's falling apart.
This is the end of everything.
Everything.
The Megyn Kelly Trump interview, I never saw that.
I don't care about her.
I don't care.
I want to tell you a couple of things, okay?
Listen to me carefully.
Listen to me.
Number one.
While we're on this subject, I'm just going to throw some things at you.
Michelle Obama is not going to run for president.
Now, I don't know what genius came up with this.
Michelle Obama is not going to run for president.
Do I make myself clear?
Is there anyone who is perpetuating this in...
Sanity.
Michelle Obama has no interest in running for president.
Do I make myself clear?
Anybody have any doubts about this?
Anybody want me to remind you of this?
I don't know.
Would you like me to...
I don't know what the word is.
Would you like me to explain this again to you?
Maybe.
I mean, I could.
I could.
Maybe, sort of.
It's not going to happen.
And yet these morons, these morons are repeating this.
I've got to tell you something.
This drives me nuts.
I think people say stuff just to say stuff.
She is through with this.
She wants to be in Martha's Vineyard.
She wants to be Oprah.
She wants to be better than Oprah.
She wants to be loved.
She wants to be sexy.
The last thing she wants to go about is that dingy prison called the White House.
The White House is not a fun place.
There is not any warmth in the White House.
If you've ever been there, it's horrid.
Mausolea are more inviting than the White House.
She did eight years there with her husband.
Eight years of living under the surveillance of the service.
And they're making the mic jokes.
She's tired of that stuff.
And what is with her daughter constantly taking pictures?
Here she is at the gas station.
Here she is smoking a cigarette.
Here she is at the Costco.
Here she is getting air in her times.
Here she is arguing about the points in her CVS customer service card.
What does she pick people up?
Does she call Daily Mail?
I'm going to be at the Texaco on Van Ness.
But noon.
Right.
I'll be there.
Thanks.
What is this?
What is this?
Please tell me Joe Jonas.
Who the hell Who cares?
There are people who care about this.
How about this?
The divorce of the fellow from Yellowstone?
What?
I don't understand this.
Can I tell you another one too?
This is a favorite story.
And I want you to listen to me.
And I want you to listen to me real good.
Promise you're going to listen to me.
Whenever you're at an event and it's of something that the other party is involved in, Vietnam rallies and all this other kind of stuff, listen to me.
Are you listening?
There is going to be FBI, federal agents in the crowd.
I'm going to say this one more time.
I want you to hear me.
First of all, you got the Michelle Obama.
She's not going to run.
She's not going to run.
Oh, by the way, number two, Barack Obama is in control of anything.
Nothing.
You understand this?
Nothing.
If you think Barack Obama...
Is in charge of...
He's the political mastermind.
You're out of your mind.
He says, whatever you say, I'll pass it on.
I did my time.
He is a dutiful soldier, if you will, of the shadow government.
Joe Biden kind of was the thought.
Gavin Newsom is going to be...
The general marshal of soldiers.
So let me just tell you right now.
He is not calling the shots.
He might know a few things.
So just forget this because people start repeating themselves.
Because something sounds good and they repeat themselves.
So he's not going to run.
She's not going to run.
I mean, he's not going to.
He's not in charge of anything.
Let me go back to this other thing too.
With all of this talk about January 6th, Owen Schroyer, various sentences.
Ray Epps was finally charged.
He was charged with a misdemeanor.
And all these people are talking.
I've got to tell you something right now.
Apparently, there's this word called no...
It sounds like ship, like ship in a bottle, but it's not.
It's scatological.
It deals with adjusted.
It sounds like no ship, but it's not.
And these people will say, you know, at events like January 6th, there are...
Federal agents posing very poorly as members of the whatever.
Now, I don't know how to break this to you.
But when you have an event at the White House that they have been praying for, that they have wanted to use to bring Trump down, they thought, is Trump stupid enough?
Stupid enough to be behind this.
Is Trump Stupid enough to actually bring this.
Is he?
Yes, he was.
We're going to be there.
They did not cause it.
They are not agents provocateurs.
They were there to observe.
Now, they can help along.
They can do a lot of other stuff.
But let's just get this out of the way.
Years ago, there was a group called the Lackawanna Six was one of them.
There was another group, too.
Somewhere upstate, somewhere in New York, these folks went.
There was a Holiday Inn Express.
And these poor jadrools, four or five of them, went.
And they had a...
Oh, they had an FBI agent who was posing as some kind of a...
Al-Qaeda, not Al-Qaeda, something whatever.
And this one guy, the leader, said, we need artillery.
Actually he said this.
He had this, we need artillery.
These people are out of their minds.
Do you remember a person named the Times Square Bomber?
The Times Square Bomber was a guy in a van who left his van there with a propane tank and an M-80, I swear to God, and left his bank book and everything and took off and they called him the Times Square Bomber.
They don't know if he had any kind of a FBI connection.
Since the beginning, anybody involved in or know what's done with the mafia or the LCN or any of these people?
Do you have any idea of what's going on?
Do you have any idea?
Snitches, undercover rats, people working off charges, agents.
If you're in a Hells Angels group, you can count the ATF people in that group.
You, if you are, if you hire a hitman, I promise you, the person is a cop.
I promise you.
So let me just say something to a lot of our friends who think, hey, I got to the, you know, I think these J6 people, I think there's a lot of feds there.
You're going to get laughed at.
No ship.
We know this.
We understand this.
Now, that's not to say that anybody January 6th was even in any way warranting any of this.
We have to just once and for all put that notion to bed.
Number three, or whatever it is, the Biden administration is telling everybody, fine rule.
They're telling Eric Adams, New York Governor Kathy Hochul, we don't want to talk to you.
Kathy Hochul right now is saying, hey, Hey!
Don't come here!
Wait a minute, excuse me, what?
What did I hear?
This is Kathy Hochul, you said that?
Hey, hey, hey, don't come here.
Don't come here?
You were the one who, Eric Adams, this is a, this is a sanctuary city.
Now he's like, we're going to buy a part!
And Biden will have nothing to do with him.
It's amazing.
Somebody said, Zelensky, it's done!
The P5, permanent security council, Biden was the only one who showed up at the UN.
They weren't even there.
Half of them are in France, party with Macron and his mom.
Why doesn't he come clean?
Come on, seriously.
Just stop it.
In any minute.
It's over!
We are at a turning point.
You understand that, right?
We're at a turning point.
And when I see that ghoul, that monster, that Shrek ogre Fetterman walking around in shorts, please explain to me the shorts.
I don't care how many strokes you've had.
Put on a suit.
Wear a tie.
I don't understand this.
Well, he's...
No, he's what?
What's the matter?
Well, he's...
Who gives it?
Put...
You can't wear that on the floor of the Senate.
This is ridiculous.
Now, in the old days, remember sometimes it would have somebody like at the UN wearing tribal headgear.
Remember Ava...
Not Morales.
Ava...
Somebody from Bolivia.
Sometimes you see people with those great hats, you know, with the colorful...
Maybe.
Sometimes there'll be some aboriginal people or somebody might be wearing an actual...
I mean, if the Saudis can wear their headgear, there's nothing like seeing somebody who's wearing basically a loincloth and a spear from some, he's the king, worth a couple of billion.
That's groovy.
That's okay.
But that's part of their culture.
Fetterman is not a part of any culture.
It is a disgrace.
And it makes me sick.
Next, for the first time in my life.
For the first time, I felt like going up to people that I know, and you know, they're driving around.
When they come here, the first thing you do is, where are you from?
Venezuela.
Venezuela, okay.
Pick a scooter.
Can you drive?
No.
Good.
Red means go.
Rojo, avante.
Me entiende?
Rojo.
They're telling people, Just go through the lights.
Don't worry about anything.
So not only you used to, when you step off a curb in New York, you have to worry about the delivery people with these e-bikes going a million miles an hour, wearing chains around their necks for loaded weight and momentum, with this big food container in their back, flying through the lights, doing their thing.
And people are stepping off the curb, and I'm just freaking out, thinking I'm going to be killed.
Now we've got these people.
I don't know who they are.
So what they're doing is, we have things like DoorDash and others.
These folks are being handed, they're being undercut, and the regular drivers, who are from other countries, who did the right thing, who went and got all these permits, and said, hey, wait a minute, and they're getting fired.
In lieu of, or not in lieu of, but versus these people who don't know where the hell they're going.
It's one thing when you're saying, listen, you got to know the city a little bit.
You got to go to Lexington, whatever.
You got it?
Okay, now here's the food.
Here's the sushi.
They're handing it to some guy from...
He finds it.
I guess he has a GPS.
It's wild.
And for the first time, I found myself wanting to say, you, get the hell out of here.
And you know who would join me?
A lot of the foreign folks who were here legally.
We went before.
There's a man who is in one of our...
We have these little stores.
It's just wonderful.
And I just know this guy.
I don't know his name.
I see him all the time.
Hi, how are you?
I don't know what South American country is.
If he's Mexican, I have no idea.
He's busting his ass.
You know he's sending money back to his...
And he's...
He's being supplanted by these people.
They want nothing but chaos.
And the best part about it is that the people, the judge rules, who said, hey, wait a minute.
And I told you, Muriel Bowser in D.C., Laurie Lightfoot, Kathy Hogle, Eric Adams, they're like, you're on your own.
Wait a minute.
What do I get out of this?
Nothing.
Are you going to help me?
Nope.
We have a new one today.
Eric Adams said, no prison sentences over 20 years.
Alvin Braith.
Alvin Braith.
No prison sentences over 20 years.
This is a restorative justice thing.
It's crazy.
And Trump is going to be the nominee within the party.
They don't know what the hell is going on.
Please, dear God, I will believe if Bobby Kennedy goes third party, I will believe If Bobby Kennedy goes third party and goes in and just kills, whittles away that vote, whittles away that vote from Gavin Newsom.
Do you see Eric Clapton?
I like Eric Clapton so much.
There's a guy on YouTube.
I don't know his name.
Let me give you his name.
He's this...
Seems like a good egg.
I don't know his...
Hang on.
Let me see here.
He's...
Hang on a minute.
I want to tell you about this guy.
He's really good.
Eric Clapton.
This guy does a...
He does an interview.
Eric Clapton.
Here we go.
He's on with the Real Music Observer.
Real Music Observer.
And this guy does a good job.
I kind of like this guy.
He's, you know, does his thing.
He has some things about Chicago I like and Steve Perry.
He does all this stuff.
Anyway, anyway.
So I'll make a long story short.
Eric Clapton's on his show.
And Eric Clapton lives in Columbus.
I guess with his wife and he's doing his thing.
So this guy...
He's got Eric on for 47 minutes.
And he keeps saying, I can't believe you.
Why me?
And Eric says, that's okay.
And he's talking about Robbie Robertson and RFK.
And this is, I love this.
When all of a sudden somebody says, I'm your pal.
Me, Eric Clapton.
I'm on your show.
I'm your pal.
Okay.
That's the way it is.
We're just buds.
And there is something that Eric Clapton does.
There is a...
I don't know what the word is.
I don't know what the phrase is.
I don't know what it is.
But there's a real sense of humanity.
I like him.
I like him.
He's been through a lot and he's wise.
Some people I thought...
We're not as nice as you thought they were.
Here's one guy I thought could not possibly be as nice as he said.
Jimmy Buffett could not have been as nice as he appeared.
Hey!
Margarita!
And I said that happened just.
That was a loss.
He was incredible.
But he was too nice.
I thought, no way.
No way.
But Eric Clapton, I think he is what he is.
I'm finding...
Mick Jagger to be completely unintelligible now.
And I want to know one thing.
Why can't they write the great music anymore?
What is this?
They ask Bob Dylan, I can't write this anymore.
Paul McCartney.
I mean, they'll put some music together.
You want to put a song together, get David Foster.
That's the guy.
Give him two notes and he'll make a hit.
That's not my song.
It isn't now.
But I thought that was so terrific.
So he is siding with Bobby Kennedy.
I think Bobby Kennedy is great.
And I want somebody to do this.
I want to say hashtag so what.
That's my thing.
It's my legacy.
Hashtag so what.
You know, Bobby Kennedy says he doesn't believe in vaccines.
So what?
No, you don't understand.
Bobby Kennedy said that actual aquarium gravel introduced rectally can ward off Variants of Omicron.
So what?
No, you don't understand.
It's wrong.
So what?
Well, Bobby Kennedy used the N-word.
I'm just saying.
So what?
He said some terrible things about...
So what?
Well, we can't allow him on YouTube or stream.
Why not?
That'd be why not the second subsidiary to so what?
Have you ever been offended?
I'm serious.
Not pissed off, not angered.
Somebody says, hey, hey, hey, that makes me upset.
Offended.
Have you ever been offended other than Fetterman walking around looking like a judrool?
Have you ever?
Have you ever been offended?
Ever?
If you hear the N-word, I'm thinking, well, that's not a good idea.
Am I offended?
No.
Now, of course, you can say, but it's not directly at you.
Okay.
Direct something at me.
Give me some epithet about being white or wearing glasses.
No, I'm not offended.
I can be mad because you're showing disrespect, but offended?
No.
What does that mean?
I don't even know what that word means.
I'm dead serious.
I don't know.
I have no idea what that word means.
I want to live in a world where you can say whatever you want.
So what?
Turn it off.
Somebody mentioned Megyn Kelly.
I couldn't care less about Megyn Kelly.
So what I do, I turn it off.
I'm not going to tell her you can't say anything.
I don't care what you...
I don't care.
I can go down a list of people I do not care what they have to say.
And it's nothing personal, and I'm not being mean.
I just don't care.
I honestly, I don't care.
This morning, early, early, early, I'm listening to lectures on the beginning of World War I. I never understood World War I. I don't get it!
I still don't get it.
What the hell was that all about?
That's fascinating.
That I'll listen to.
And I like having, this is East McKeesport Junior College, and I guess, you know, I find that fascinating.
I'm not going to hear Ben Shapiro.
Ever.
I don't care.
Remember those stupid things people would do?
They would go to a college and they would get some 20-year-olds and say, Ivan, you're a communist!
Do you know what communism is?
No!
I don't know!
And then it's, ah-ha-ha.
And of course, they would drop those glasses and the gangsters.
Remember that meme for the glasses and drop them?
Because you pick that one up.
I'm not picking on Ben, but I mean, whoever.
Whoever it was.
And you pick this thing.
You know who had a damn good show the other day?
Great morning show.
I thought it was terrific.
I thought it was very funny.
Crowder.
Steven Crowder.
Louder or Crowder.
The Mug Club or whatever it was.
Funny.
Very, very funny.
Some morning shows just don't.
Just don't do it.
I was watching...
Max Blumenthal.
Excellent.
Excellent.
And he's an example of this political mind that I don't know where it fits in.
I thought he was terrific.
Wonderful.
I'll listen to that.
I like that.
That's a unique take.
Nobody gets upset.
Certain things I like.
Like food.
Certain foods I like.
Certain things I just don't particularly care for.
But, so that's me.
And if you want to hear it, so what?
I had a big problem with people doing things like shutting TikTok down.
Even though that isn't, I don't get, I don't want to get near that.
In China, you can only watch, how many minutes a day can you kids watch TikTok?
40 minutes a day, that's it.
I don't want to shut it down.
I don't want to shut it down.
If we had kids right now, I'm going to say, I'm going to tell you something right now, and I want you to listen to me.
We love you.
I'm your father.
I don't want you to watch this.
I'm not going to buy it.
I'm going to tell you something right now.
You've got to understand something.
I'm going to beat you.
Not physically, but I'm going to win.
I'm going to win.
If you challenge me, I'm going to win.
I just am.
And you've got to understand that when I tell you something, it's for your own good.
That's what a parent should do.
Everybody shut down TikTok because it's...
Well, that's because I don't want people to shut things down.
I'm very allergic to things like that.
So what?
Don't watch it.
Don't listen to it.
Big deal.
So what?
Russell Brand is...
I don't like Russell Brand.
I don't like Russell Brand.
I don't like him.
Would you let your daughter go to Russell Brand?
No.
But to de-platform the guy?
Why?
If you don't like him, so what?
You know who I think is a real jerk?
Bill Maher.
So I don't watch him.
Kathy Griffin.
I don't watch her.
I was watching that, oh, this one vowel.
Remember the one with the mouth?
The comedian?
I just, I hear her.
I don't watch her.
I elect...
What is the matter with us?
When do we become so tolerant over somebody saying something?
Well, you know, that's not true.
So?
There was a guy, remember the juice man years ago?
Remember the juice man?
He was a guy who did this thing, he said, and beets are the closest thing to blood.
What?
What are you talking about?
And he sold these juicers.
I had a friend of mine.
I've got to clean the story up.
I had a friend of mine.
A little well known, but I'm not going to bless his heart.
He's no longer with us.
And he's dead as well.
And he went to this thing at a holiday and it was a lecture on beet juice.
No, no, no.
On juicing.
It was called the juice man.
Remember him?
The guy who had that big furry eyebrows.
He was the juice man.
He was the juice man.
And my friend went with his wife, and this was a juicer.
Not like the ones you got on your counter, no.
This thing had like a Briggs& Stratton, like an eight horsepower.
This thing was huge, with a big plunger and this long device.
You had the glass, and here's ten pairs.
Here's a carrot.
Here, you want some?
No.
It had this weird film on it from all the cellulose.
Here's some kale and some parsley and mint.
And he got into this juicing because he went to see this guy and he was on TV.
And my friend had told me, I said, if you mention that thing with the beets being the closest chemical to blood, I'm going to kill you.
I'm going to put your head in that device and stop it.
Stop talking about juicing.
For the love of God, stop talking about juicing.
Alright.
Now I'm going to clean this up.
I'm going to do the best I can.
I happened to be in the men's room and he came in.
I was there.
And all of a sudden the door was up and he flies in to a stall.
I mean like runs.
I thought, ooh, this is not a good sign.
You don't normally run.
So I'm finishing up there and I heard noises.
Imagine Well, first of all, it just sounded like somebody taking a bucket of something.
It's a little thicker than water and just pouring it, standing about six or seven feet on top of a toilet.
That sound.
And I'm thinking, oh my God.
And he's in there saying, yo!
Whoa!
And I've never heard this.
I said, I'm going to wait.
And he comes out and he's like perspiring.
He said, whew, man.
I said, are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
I said, listen, I'm no expert here, but I...
And please, I hope you don't mind me saying it, because I couldn't help but overhear this noise here, but I don't think...
I said, are you still drinking that juice?
I said, you know, I think that...
And he says, don't you understand?
The beats I know are the closest thing to blood.
So he goes to a doctor.
And he says, Doc, I've got some loose.
He goes, what are you eating?
He says, wow, in the morning I have about nine carrots, four, a dozen apples, celery.
He goes, what?
He goes, well, I juice them.
He says, stop doing that.
That's what, you can't do this.
I one time had a thing in my fridge.
It was pear juice.
I had a little juicer, but it was pear.
My friend saw this, thought it was apple juice.
So he just takes it, throws it back, goes to court.
He's halfway through something, and it hit him.
Okay, why do I say this?
Why am I talking about loose, egesta, and this?
While I believe that juicing is a very good thing, these people would go nuts.
And they would say, it cures cancer.
It can reverse schizophrenia, depression, alcoholism, name it.
And I said, that is irresponsible.
That is not going to shrink a glioma.
That is not going to do anything with some stage 4 metastatic.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
It couldn't hurt, but it's not going to reverse or cure cancer.
Don't say that.
Sure enough, on TV, and there's leading up to why I'm telling you this, on TV, there's, of course, this move that one says, I had cancer, and I fought back, and I am, you know, using this stuff.
Okay.
Let me try to tell you this again in my own inimitable way.
And listen very carefully.
That is irresponsible for you to go on TV or anything and tell somebody that they can reverse cancer by prayer, By beet juice or anything else.
If you want to pray, you pray.
But you better go to a physician.
You better look at this thing.
You need oncology.
And I'm sorry, it may be the worst thing in the world for you, but don't tell people that.
Now, that being said, would I ban that from TV?
No.
Would I ban it from radio?
Would I deplatform somebody if they said that cancer can be cured with beet juice?
No.
Because this is America.
And you're able to say the most stupid thing in the world, and it's okay.
And if you want to forego treatments because of this guy, the juice man, or whatever, then that's up to you.
You're an idiot, but that's free.
Free speech is a bitch.
It really is.
It's tough.
And we have lost all sense of this.
We have become so complacent.
We have become so accepting of this.
So what?
He says this, so what?
I've got a friend of mine who goes on different platforms.
He tells people, oh yeah, if you're gay, you can change.
You can't change.
You can stop doing certain external behaviors, but you are not.
Whatever your heart is, you're not going to change.
Should I let him say that?
Of course.
It's a free country.
So what?
It's stupid.
It's not true.
So what?
We've lost our way.
This is the end of everything.
Free speech.
You know the problem of free speech?
Let me tell you.
The problem of free speech is when, not when the government tells you to shut up, but when your relatives and your friends do.
Like that Karen I saw sitting in there with her damn wheelchair running over the dog's paw.
She reminded me.
of those people I had to do to.
You know who she reminds me of?
What?
I don't know why.
Oh, yeah!
Anne Ramsey.
Here we go.
Why did you, YouTube, take down your hilarious video regarding courtroom names?
Is that story on your personal website?
No, they didn't do that.
I did that.
Oh, no, no, no.
I did that.
I got rid of so much stuff, it's just meaningless.
Let me also tell you something, what you should do.
Listen to me carefully.
And by the way, Glenn Hughes, thank you, Glenn, if that's your real name.
You should go back and use these programs and clean up everything from your Twitter, like, three years ago.
Just get rid of it.
What is it there for?
I look at all this stuff.
I got rid of stuff.
I don't want to see it.
I don't want to be out there.
It's irrelevant.
It doesn't work.
I look at my prior stuff now as a liability.
I don't mean it.
And it's because it'll be taken out of context.
Oh, I can't say what I...
Oh, God.
Can't say whatever it was.
I recognize this fact, but I can't...
Being profane is one thing, but I...
Somebody will come along and find fault with what you were saying.
And that's just the way it is.
And unfortunately, that's the way we are.
But I want to live in a country where you can say whatever you want.
Period.
And I mean whatever you want.
Maybe a little warning, maybe something for parental advisory.
Something like that.
That's it.
That's all.
I think you should tell people, by the way, I curse or I'm blue or whatever, just in case kids are listening.
That's it.
Other than that, whatever you want.
I am so...
It's not that I'm tolerant.
So what?
I told somebody one day, I said, you know, I don't...
I said, if your son or daughter marry somebody of a different race, Would you go along with it?
I said, I don't care.
I said, what do you mean?
I said, I don't care.
It doesn't matter to me.
I was pretty open-minded.
No, you don't understand.
It's like if you told me, well, you know, he's left-handed.
I don't care.
Certain things just don't, it doesn't matter to me.
Sometimes you might say, well, you know, this is a weird world, you might have people don't understand, but I don't care.
There's no group of people that I care about.
I don't care.
People ask this question, and you really shouldn't ask yourself.
If your son or daughter came to you and said, like in the old days, they said, I'm gay.
Okay.
It's alright.
I don't care.
I still love you.
Why?
I don't care.
What am I going to do?
Change it?
No.
I don't care.
So, it seems like I'm open-minded.
I'm not.
I don't care.
It doesn't mean anything.
So what?
I'm interested in stuff where people are hurt.
That's what bothers me when I see my country falling apart.
Not because somebody espouses something which makes no sense or something that is demented.
I understand, to me, the stuff that I cannot believe or people believe is religion.
It fascinates me.
So what?
But I have my opinion.
I think a lot of it's nuts.
But so what?
It's a freak.
It's free.
Do whatever you want.
But it's crazy.
So you can think, you know, whatever you want.
I want to live in a world where I can say what I want, where you can say what you want.
That's it.
Is that too much to ask?
Is that wrong?
I forget who that old joke was.
You know what I'm saying?
It doesn't matter.
I'm going to get back to the rudiments of this.
Our good friend White Monkey says I'm not going to read this.
I'm not going to read this out loud, but I don't know what to tell you, but thank you.
I don't know if White Monkey is a good idea, but that's another thing too.
Do you remember when All in the family came and they would use the N word.
Remember the N word?
I never heard the N word in Florida.
Florida.
I heard it here.
And a lot of times from people who were using it as a form of affection who were African American.
I never really heard it used as apathy.
I never did.
Never did.
And I always said, you know, that when you insist upon calling it the N-word, you're holding it up.
You are perpetuating its pain.
You are perpetuating the sting of it.
You are elevating it.
This is an apotheosis.
This is a canonization of the word.
You're ensuring that it will always be there to hurt.
And when you call it the N-word, it insults my intelligence because I know what you're saying and that doesn't sanitize anything.
When I watch The Sopranos, which they didn't do, but sometimes you go, hey, no flipping way.
Hold it, Tony Soprano.
Never said that.
They did one thing.
In Living Color, where they took all the A&E presents The Sopranos, and they took all the cussing out, and they don't say anything.
But when we hold that word up, elevate it, and ensure that for generations to come, we'll have it as well, because we've enshrined it in the N-word.
It will go away if you just let it bore people.
You want to say it?
Go ahead.
Good luck, but go ahead.
It doesn't matter to me.
I don't care.
I don't care.
So what?
That's what you want to do.
Go ahead.
Knock yourself up.
Say it again.
Tell me when you're done.
Pretty soon.
Okay.
I did a thing one time on IATA.com.
IATA was the first internet radio station, but it was before broadband.
And the very first day we were on, we said, you can say whatever you want.
You can say whatever you want.
Doesn't matter.
And we were like, I mean, we were all these ex-radio people and we're just spewing this.
Oh my God.
One woman, it was like, and people use the word Tourette's.
That's caprolalia.
That's the rarest symptom of Tourette's.
A lot of times, blinking in ticks, that's Tourette's.
It sounded like it was weird.
People were like, I know what?
And after like 20 minutes, they go, this is stupid.
And they stopped.
When Howard Stern, by the way, he doesn't know where he is.
He has just lost it.
He is so off the trajectory.
Are you making fun of my wife?
Getting mad at Bill Moore?
What happened to him?
He's now talking about making fun of...
Who was it?
Russell Brand?
This guy used to make fun of mentally retarded people.
What they used to be called?
Beetlejuice?
Remember that?
Oh, I know.
He's making fun of Lauren Boebert.
After what he did?
You hypocritical bastard.
How do you do that?
How do you do that?
In any event, in the old days, when he and I get from what I heard, because I never heard one of his shows, but he would get real close to saying something, but didn't.
Did you hear what Howard said?
He almost said it.
That's when it was exciting.
Do you know when sexy was sexy?
Before nudity.
Nudity.
Ta-da!
All right.
Okay.
Here you go.
I will say that forever.
When you want to see real, real, real sexy stuff, look at romance, look at seduction, look at the old movies.
Nobody's taking their clothes off.
They're such, I mean, it is like they're rabid passion and nobody's doing anything.
This wouldn't convert today.
That is something that is lost.
Think about it.
We are so demented.
Why?
Because Fetterman's walking around in his underwear on the floor of the Senate.
There you go.
I say things not because I'm old-fashioned, but because they're true.
I've always said this.
I've always said this.
There are some things that are just so perfect, you don't understand the essence of it.
Want to play guitar?
Play acoustic.
Start with that.
Everything else is just...
Play the real thing.
That's the guitar.
That's it.
I hope today kids have crushes.
I hope they have like girlfriends.
Remember when you were a kid, they would have these around Valentine's Day.
Remember those hearts?
Those little hearts?
And you were just blushing into this courting and you didn't know what it was, but you knew that girls were different than boys and you kind of liked them.
And you didn't understand, what the hell is this?
But yeah, she's different than her.
Nobody knew.
And it was this evolving of the romance where you just knew something.
And I'm sure gay people do the same thing, but still.
Do kids do that anymore?
I don't think so.
It's so sad.
Why?
Because this is the end of everything.
Now my friends, a couple of things here.
You know and I know, as I've been telling you for the longest time, That someday, some event will happen.
I don't know what it is.
A meteor?
UFOs?
Chain?
Distribution chain?
Something will go wrong and it will close stores.
And you're going to say, God!
It happened!
We didn't do this.
That's okay, honey.
We've got stuff in the cupboard.
And you look and you go to your larder and you say, what do we have?
Nothing.
We have some...
Dry spaghetti, and we got a lot of pop tart, a lot of things wrapping, and you've got kids.
Can you go a week?
No.
Can you do 2,000 calories a day?
No.
If you have 31 varieties of this?
No.
If you open it and reseal it and use it again?
No.
Do you have 120 pounds of food?
No.
Does it have a 25-year shelf life?
No.
You don't have it.
You don't.
Because you didn't listen.
Or you thought, well...
I don't have to worry about that.
All bets are off in this world we live in.
Why?
Because this is the end of everything.
So my friends, I want you to go to preparewithlionel.com preparewithlionel.com for the love of God.
This is so...
This is not an extravagance, I should say.
Or an extravaganza.
And one more thing.
You know who's still standing?
Mike Lindell.
Still standing.
Still standing.
MyPillow.com.
Don't you love that guy?
You're the nicest.
Do you see him in the deposition?
He's still doing it.
He's like Trump.
He's just still doing it.
They tried it.
Oh, that's it.
He's going out of business.
No, he's not.
No, he's not.
MyPillow.com, promo code Lionel.
We are a MyPillow family, and I'm telling you.
They are the best.
MyPillow.com, promo code LINO.
Go there and get a free gift.
Tautological?
Perhaps.
I want to thank my wife tonight for giving her to try.
We had this damn echo.
I don't know what the hell that was about.
We tried.
I want to try some different because she has a perspective that most people do not have, which is unfortunate.
I want to also one day take you around I'm going to take you, I'm going to video kind of walking around the area.
I'll get one of those.
You don't see those anymore.
You know those sticks?
People walk around, you know, with the...
Yeah, no.
They put your video on and they take pictures of themselves.
No, not a GoPro.
It was those extendable sticks.
You put your...
And you walk around and you can...
I don't see them.
They just hold it out.
Remember that stick?
That extendable thing?
That's passe.
Also, why do people walk around talking on their phones now?
The Kardashians started it.
Uh-huh.
So anyway, so I went to the...
Yeah.
So the rectal itch was acting...
You got a problem, buddy?
The rectal itch was really getting bad.
It was fungating.
And the pustules were really bad.
So I tried Tegrin.
I lanced it.
Did a sitz bath.
Don't make me come up with it, buddy.
I got a right to talk.
Okay?
So anyway, so I used the Epsom sauce, packed it in ice, and lanced them.
Yeah, like a pilonidal cyst.
You could drive a truck through it.
There's no...
There's no respect.
There's no...
Look at this.
Curious Carly says, my pillow is 10 years old and still has that little perfect lumps in it.
You get sometimes a pillow that's just perfect.
If it's too hard to, you want to get just that perfect.
And sometimes you want to make sure where the pillowcases smell right.
And there's nothing better when you have fresh sheets.
You know what I'm talking about?
Okay.
Enough of this.
I'm rambling.
I'm a rambling kind of guy.
Alright, dear friends.
Have a great and glorious day.
Thank you so much.
Please Follow Mrs. L at Lin's Warriors.
Lin's Warriors, please, we expect you to sign up.
And also, did you see the interview I did with Judge Napolitano?
He's so good.
Such a good egg.
He really is.
We talked about the Constitution.
We talked about law.
We talked about First Amendment.
We talked about stuff that I love talking about.
That's my stuff.
And that's, by the way, that's the link right there for it.
So please watch it.
Tell him what you think.
Thank him for it.
He's very good.
I've always liked him immensely.
I've listened to his lectures.
I love...
He's so profound.
We need him so, so much.
All right, dear friends.
Have a great and glorious day.
See you tomorrow at 8 a.m.
Thank you for...
Well, just thank you for being here.
All right?
Isn't that nice?
Sweet, too.
See you tomorrow at 8 a.m.
Don't forget, the monkey's dead.
The show's over.
Sue you.
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