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Sept. 13, 2023 - Lionel Nation
01:03:01
Gun Confiscation, WTC Acknowledged (Sorta) and Wishy-Washy GOP Still Won't Impeach Biden
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Good day, my friend.
Good day.
Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to this thing of ours.
Have a seat.
Pull up a chair.
Pull up a beanbag.
We have a lot to discuss and to go through.
In this, our inimitable way.
In this, I promise you one thing and one thing only.
I'm not going to lie to you.
I'm not going to BS you.
If I tell you something's good, it's good.
If I tell you something's bad, it's bad.
I'm not going to say something just to make you feel okie-dokie about something.
You got it?
You got it?
That's exactly how this works.
So let me first ask you, as usual, dear friend, to like this video.
I know you're tired of that.
I'm the same way.
I look at something, and the first thing they tell me is, like the video.
*clap* *clap* *clap* *clap*
I haven't even heard you yet.
What am I liking?
Subscribe?
I don't know you yet, but that's the way it goes.
But let me tell you something that's going on right now.
This is from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office of Human Services Emergency Preparedness and Response.
The United States observes National Preparedness Month each September to raise awareness about the importance of preparing for disasters and emergencies that could happen at any time.
ACF, which is the Office of Administration for Children and Families, emergency and disaster operations are led by the Office of Human Services, emergency preparedness and response.
There's so many stuff.
There's National Preparedness Month.
Social inequities are often exacerbated by disasters.
This is the government.
Telling you, get ready for disasters.
You get ready.
You get ready.
This is very interesting.
They're not saying, hey, don't worry about this.
It's like if the police were to say, hey, listen, don't go downtown.
You know what I mean?
What are you telling me there?
You're the police.
I know.
We're telling you, don't go downtown.
I was looking at a video.
On prepping.
And invariably, you should see this.
I don't know why they get Cousin Zeke or Fred Ziffel.
They always think that people who are ready to prepare for emergencies look like something from deliverance.
I don't know where this comes from.
I don't understand this.
I'm telling you right now, and I told you this before, Hint after hint, nudge after nudge, suggestion after suggestion, get ready.
It's coming.
It's big.
It's huge.
We don't know how.
We don't know what it's going to be.
We don't know the framework of it, if it's going to be weather or not.
I don't know.
You don't know.
And like I'm trying to tell you, this is the most important.
We're not saying.
When I say this, people think, are you saying there's no food?
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I can't, I can't, I can't say it enough.
You know what I mean?
You know what I'm talking about?
You know what I'm talking about?
Okay, alright, alright, that's enough of that.
Now!
Where do we start, dear friends?
Let's talk about the impeachment inquiry.
Isn't that great?
Right off the bat, how many people think that the impeachment inquiry amounts to anything?
Go ahead.
Knock yourself out.
Who thinks that the impeachment inquiry matters?
Please, tell me.
It's good, right?
It's good, isn't it?
Better than nothing?
Who thinks?
Anybody?
I mean, it's good news, isn't it?
It's Kevin McCarthy.
It's an inquiry or inquiry.
I think it's inquiry.
That's what I would say.
I think inquiry.
That's a cool way to say it.
So what are they going to do?
I don't know.
Why don't you think Kevin McCarthy, why don't you put it up for a vote in the House?
No!
What if it fails?
Then you've got Jordan and Comer saying, don't do that.
What are you doing?
What are you putting this inquiry?
No, no, we're doing this.
Let us keep doing our stuff.
Yeah, but we can get more information.
We can get more We have more subpoena power, more okay, but don't screw this up.
You know this thing's going to die, right?
I mean, you just know it's going to die.
You know it's just going to be...
Kevin McCarthy doesn't have his heart in this.
He's doing this to satisfy your girlfriend, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and your boyfriend, Matt Gaetz.
Matt Gaetz.
And they have nothing in common, these people.
Matt Gaetz, Tate, Portnoy, Tucker now, people who creep me out.
I'm getting creepy.
I get creepy feelings.
You know what I mean?
Some may write with these people.
Some may write.
It's really weird.
But let me go back to this.
So yes, you know, Kevin, By the way, those Republicans are really smart.
Those are the ones who didn't even let McCarthy at first.
They were going to withhold his speakership.
I mean, these Republicans.
But can we dream for a moment?
Can we dream?
I want to see Joe Biden impeached.
Don't you?
I want to see, Joe, if you ask the Republicans, hey, do you think it would be a good idea if we were to impeach Trump?
Yes.
You couldn't even get the question out.
They say, yes?
No, let me finish.
Do you think President Trump?
Yes.
Let me finish.
Do you think we should impeach?
Yes.
Yes.
Because they're vicious.
Republicans, they talk about it.
Let's have an inquiry.
Are you kidding?
They impeached him twice.
After he already left off?
I mean, what?
They're going to go after the emoluments clause.
I don't want to use this word.
Look, there's this terrible word.
Not terrible.
But it rhymes with wussy.
And that is the...
You see, that's the Republican.
You know, I want you to hear me out.
Everybody wants to talk about...
No masculinity.
We need more men.
The men, we're losing the men.
We're not losing the men.
And the testosterone and the men!
We're going to have men.
All these people writing books about being a man.
Let me tell you what we need, okay?
We need, and I don't know what you want to call this, people, men and women, this goes for both, With elephantine, gargantuan, brass steel balls.
Absolutely brutal.
A real savagery.
A real sense of...
We just go for the throat.
And it's nothing personal.
In fact, it's a detached cool.
It's a dangerous anger.
It's furious, but there's no yelling and screaming.
I don't need to worry.
It's no UFC.
We're not going to do a rear neck.
No, no, no.
This is like one of these.
No.
Let me give you an example.
I'll never forget this.
You don't have a buddy today once.
Remember when Zuckerberg said, I'm gonna...
How much do you want to bet he and Elon said, okay, listen.
Elon said, I'll call it off.
I don't want to fight.
Yeah, me neither.
Okay, good.
Do you think Zuckerberg really wants to get in there?
That's the most stupid thing in the world.
That's the most stupid thing in the world.
But I gotta tell you something.
On the subject, there's boxing, and there's jiu-jitsu, and there's Brazilian this, and there's, you know, UFC, and all this, and there's a cap out.
You know, hey, there's a tap out.
There's a tap out.
We're going to tap out.
Okay.
We're going to tap out.
Great.
Wonderful.
We're going to tap out.
Okay.
Well, here's what's happening.
And this is a very interesting thing.
You know what's really interesting about all this stuff?
And I think it's fascinating to note.
When the people who are involved in The real nasty stuff.
The people who are involved in combat fighting.
The real serious combat.
You know, hand-to-hand stuff.
The ones who are like in trenches and in foxholes.
You know those people?
You know those people?
Yeah.
You know those people, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they don't know anything about tapping out and rear naked choke.
No, they choke you.
They kill you.
They take a pencil.
They're not into this.
That's the kind of combat I think is interesting.
The stuff that they can't even show you.
That's what I'd like to know.
Not this other stuff.
That's the way to do it.
You want to fight these people or you want to kill these people?
What do you want to do?
You want to go in there and prepare?
You want to dance around the room?
You want to take off your shirt and rub around some guy you don't know?
No thanks.
But I would like to know, not that I ever wanted, but I would like to know if you ever had to really finish somebody off.
That's what I'd like to know.
Where do you go learn that?
Well, we don't really teach that, but that's what I'd like to learn.
Where do you finish somebody off?
Do you understand this?
That's what I'd like to know.
And when it comes to politics, I want to finish the guy off.
The greatest of them all, the most vicious politician of them all.
Two.
Number one and number two.
Number one in modern times is LBJ.
Number two, RFK.
Bobby Kennedy.
Oh, but Linden?
Ask about...
Josepha, ask about his sister.
Ask about Mac Wallace.
Ask about what they did.
Nobody, nobody, nobody was as brutal and as vicious as LBJ.
And the GOP doesn't have it.
And there were people, there were people, there were centurions and there were people in battle.
Brave, brave military folks who were the nicest people in the world.
They were wonderful.
They had families and kids.
Who was it?
George Marshall grew tomatoes with his wife.
They were killers.
They would go out there and they would say, we're going to take out this entire...
But the GOP doesn't have that.
They don't have that.
And I can't say enough.
Why do I say it?
You know who's got that?
Well, who might have it now?
This guy.
You see, this guy, you, you, you had the chance to get Hillary, but you didn't.
Because you said, well, I don't think I want to do that.
Mm-hmm.
No.
No.
So what's going to happen?
Well, it's going to be an inquiry.
And that's going to go on forever.
And they're going to stonewall.
And they're going to block it.
And the Democratic media are going to go crazy pointing this out.
What are you doing?
And then Joe's going to start doing the...
I mean, he's going to really get back.
Really get back.
Oh, you ain't seen nothing yet.
How are they doing with Vietnam?
Did they buy that thing?
Do I look crazy enough?
I think they're buying it, Joe.
I'm getting tired of acting crazy.
I got that crazy to help the kid.
Because he does, I think he wants, you know that Joe wants to protect Hunter.
Not because he cares about Hunter, but because Hunter will give up everything.
Hunter will bring down the whole family.
The brother, the mother, I mean that whole family.
Do you know how many LLCs they had?
Oh my god, they had more shell companies?
Hunter will bring the whole crew down.
Do you understand this?
Hunter will bring everybody down.
Everybody.
You dig?
You dig what I'm saying?
Everybody.
I'm telling you.
I'm warning you.
I'm telling you.
I am telling you.
Let me also tell you something.
Some other new information here.
Keep an eye.
Be very afraid of something I'm going to tell you which scares the hell out of me.
Mrs. L and I were talking and I thought, oh boy.
You know who's going to be really big?
Big, big, big in promoting the Gavin Newsom?
The Gettys.
Watch.
Oh yeah.
California?
Gavin Newsom?
Oh yeah.
And they love Carmelita Harris.
Uh-oh.
Now, does it matter?
Not really.
I mean, do you think she'd do round two again?
Do you think maybe they'd make her president?
Joe steps down.
She goes in for a little bit.
Just that.
Just that.
Just to make you think like, oh no.
Because watch the Getty.
You're going to see a whole new group of people here right now.
A whole group of people.
A whole new, a new configuration.
Not necessarily the same, folks.
See, this is what I was trying to tell you the other day.
Nobody's listening because they're stuck in this thing.
Obama is done.
He's finished.
He's old.
That was 2000.
That was then.
Obama is another story.
Obama, you know, thanks a lot.
But it's over with.
Okay?
This was 2009 to 17. That was then.
Light years away.
Light years away.
And what they want to do right now is the people, the stuff that he even cared about.
When Barack Obama was president, we had the NDAA, the National Defense Authorization Act, where they would actually, and this is important, they would actually sell, reposition, retrofit, refit military-type equipment for cities, for police.
We don't do that anymore!
Obama was a badass comparison.
Obama was serious business.
Obama was tough.
Obama was in the...
He was not...
Joe is a different story.
This is a new...
It's not Joe.
It's the new...
It's this globalist Klaus Schwab group.
Whoever these people are.
It's a different world.
It's a different world.
So issue number one.
Are they going to impeach him?
But would it be great if they impeach Biden, they convict Biden, they throw him out, and they indict him.
And they indict him, his brother, Jill, the dog, Hunter over, Hunter over and over.
And then Hunter will say, but I didn't know what I was doing.
I was on drugs.
Okay.
Bring down the whole family.
That never happened.
But wouldn't you love that?
Oh my God.
I wouldn't even know what to do.
He makes...
Listen to what I'm saying.
Lyndon Johnson was the most...
He was corrupt.
He had more...
Lyndon Johnson, when he left office, was worth a fortune.
He had WLBJ, the only radio station.
And anytime you had to do anything with him, you had to buy time on that radio station.
And it was, of course, it was Lady Bird's, not his.
You know how that is.
You see, when you're in office, like in the case of Nancy Pelosi, you always say, is your husband?
Oh, he's the genius.
He's the financial genius.
He's not the financial genius.
But we never got the story.
I think we know what's happening with this little hammer frame.
You know what I mean?
If I had a hammer, I think we know about Paul Pelosi.
Paul Pelosi, remember that?
Paul's got a lot of issues.
Paul's got a lot of issues.
And Paul is, ah, nobody cares.
Paul Pelosi can do whatever he wants.
But he was the genius.
They got some IPO they know about?
Paul takes care of it.
And the insider trading?
Paul takes care of it.
Same thing with, remember, oh God.
What was her name?
The African American Congresswoman, real loud.
You should call her the Whig.
What's your call?
The wig.
I don't know.
She says, I want you to go outside and anytime you see a Trump person, if you get in the film station, anyway.
Remember that one?
You know who she is.
What's her name?
Quick, somebody tell me.
With a Whig.
Real loud mouth.
No, the hat was a purple hat.
She wore a purple hat.
Who am I talking about?
Come on, help me out.
Maxine Waters.
Thank you, Irish Princess.
Maxine Waters.
Maximum Maxine Waters.
Maxine Waters.
Remember Maxine?
Oh, it's her daughter.
Come on!
He's a millionaire!
Millionaire!
Maxine's as dumb as rocks!
Millionaire!
Issue number three.
It's on with John McLaughlin.
You see what they're doing with this Grisham in New Mexico?
Oh, God.
They get this dumbass and they say, you're going to be the point person for anti-gun stuff.
Really?
Really.
Oh, that's great.
Yeah, it sure is.
You're going to be the point person.
Isn't that wonderful?
And you're going to basically do something which is so bloody unconstitutional.
But you're going to be the front line of this.
Go ahead and do it.
Oh, and by the way, when you do this, we're going to ignore you.
We're going to forget you.
Like you never existed.
Like you never lived.
Just like we did with Muriel Bowser.
Remember her?
The mayor of D.C.?
Come on, Muriel.
Go ahead and do this stuff.
Be a sanctuary city and all this stuff.
And when she says, help me!
Help me with it!
No, I can't help you with that one.
Sorry.
Lori Lightfoot.
Remember Lori Lightfoot?
Lori!
Destroying Chicago!
Lori!
That despicable!
That horrible!
Where's your name?
Gone.
Oh, she's teaching at Harvard.
That's what everybody gets.
Who in the hell would ever take a class from Lori Lightfoot?
Then there was Kathy Hochul.
Come on, Kathy!
Ruin this.
Oh, ruin it.
I mean, just ruin it.
She's the worst.
And by the way, this isn't their own it's not their own their own stuff.
It's their it's not their own behavior, their own desire.
It's what they're told to do.
Then Eric Adams.
Oh, the biggest judge rule of them all.
Oh my God!
Oh, Eric Adams.
Oh, the worst.
Dummy, dumbass, has no clue as to anything.
He is the worst.
Absolutely, positively, the worst.
You hear me?
The worst.
And you know what else is interesting about him?
You're going to love this.
He got sucked into this too.
He was told, no, you go ahead and do this.
No, no, do the sanctuary city.
Are you sure?
Oh, we'll cover you.
Remember, he wanted to make New York a magnet city or something.
He didn't know what he was doing.
Because he thought, I'm going to be...
I'm going to be, you know, I'm going to be Mr. Cool.
They love me.
I'm going to, look, they're bringing me to Rayo's.
Hey, I'm with Bo Deedle.
He's my friend.
Yes, Eric.
Yes, we're your friend.
I'm at Rayo's.
They like me.
Oh, yeah, they do.
And they're going to set you at the Hamptons.
Isn't this great?
Yeah.
The Hamptons.
The Hamptons.
Oh, boy.
Okay.
All right.
Okie dokie.
Mm-hmm.
If they're going to drop you, they won't know who you are.
They hate you.
They hate this city.
All they want you for is so that you can get deals with them if they've got a Brooklyn waterfront or whatever it is.
They want a pushover.
You and your entire administration of, oh, looks like Hooterville.
But that's what they do.
And then they use you and they toss you aside.
And you're nothing to these people.
Ask Muriel Bowser.
Ask soon.
Ask Kathy Hochul.
Ask Laurie Leff.
I go down the list.
They use you.
And now we've got Grisham.
This idiot who says, well, I'm going to do this.
I mean, nobody, nobody even understands what it means.
Now, I told you this yesterday.
I'm going to say it again.
This is about gun confiscation.
This is about gun confiscation.
You understand what I'm saying?
This was gone confiscation.
Do you understand this?
Gun confiscation.
I can't say it enough.
I can't say it enough.
I can't put it into words enough.
I can't go out of my war.
I can't say it.
They want everything.
They hate guns.
They want to take everything.
Not just assault weapons.
Not just AR-15s.
They want everything.
You know that, though.
I know you know that.
You know this.
So that's that.
Second, this is the most amazing thing.
For the first time, And I mentioned this today.
There's a video I did.
For the first time, the World Trade Center, for the first time, WTC7 has been acknowledged.
I can't believe it.
It's acknowledged.
They actually said, and I couldn't believe this.
This is the New York Post.
They even mentioned it.
By name.
Oh my God!
Could this be for years?
Nobody would dare say its name.
You never meant.
Here it is right now.
Watch this.
Watch it.
Amazing!
I'm thinking, oh my God!
Something.
Maybe what may happen.
Little by little we've been talking about.
Oh, and there's an internecine fight, by the way, going in between the climate folks.
You ready for this?
The anti-climate folks who are fighting, they won't acknowledge geoengineering.
There's a fight.
Okay?
Not the climate freaks, but the ones who are claiming...
That the climate freaks are climate freaks.
There's a battle going on.
A battle.
One of these days, you're going to hear the entire story of geoengineering laid out.
It is being...
Dane Wigington and others have been chronicling this brilliantly.
And it's there, right in front of you.
And the people who are worried about...
Penguins and this and polar bears aren't mentioning it at all.
Now, here's the bottom line.
What's happening?
Gavin Newsom is going to be the nominee.
I don't know how it's going to happen and the Gettys and others and the big, big money in California are behind him.
They have been waiting for this for the longest time.
This is the California Mafia.
Okay?
And he has promised he will sign off on whatever they throw at him.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
Whatever they throw at him.
You got it?
And they're not even close to it.
Now, how's Trump doing?
Trump's doing incredible.
Doing fantastic.
His numbers are going up.
His popularity is going up with every indictment.
Doesn't make any sense.
But it's true.
It's going up, going up.
Let me ask you something.
Have you seen Bobby Kennedy?
Where is he?
Biggest, wishy-washy, boring, oh my god.
You know what show I like?
I like that Sagar and Crystal.
Breaking Point or Point Break or whatever the hell it's called.
I like their stuff.
And I'll tell you what else I like, depending on who the hosts are.
I like the hill.
What's it called?
Oh, for the love of God.
The morning show.
It's The Hill.
This is real good.
Let me see.
Morning.
What is the name of this show?
You know The Hill, for God's sakes.
Anyway, you know their name.
I can't remember.
These names mean nothing to me.
The happening, the yawning, the dawning, whatever the hell it's called.
Anyway.
This one group is very, very good.
Very good.
And I like them a lot.
Hang on a minute.
Let me give you this name.
Oh, by the way, the new iPhone came out tonight.
Are you kidding?
Did you see these babies?
Oh, the new iPhone.
Would you turn that off?
It's an appliance.
It's...
I...
Anyway.
Okay, this is called...
Oh, The Rising.
The Rising.
Excellent.
And The Rising that I really like a lot is...
You know who I'm talking about.
Hang on.
What is her name?
I can never...
Just a minute.
Let me turn this down.
It's called...
Okay, it is...
Oh, Brianna Joy Gray and Robbie Suave.
Excellent.
Excellent.
And what Brianna does, Joy Gray, which I like, is there will be a...
I don't want to say left, but a kind of a progressive take, but rational.
Absolutely rational.
Now, sometimes they'll have people sitting in for them.
They're horrible.
Horrible.
And the other one that I like, Mr. Sagar, I call him Sugar.
His name is...
Hang on.
These names.
They just don't...
Breaking points.
That's it.
Sagar and...
Crystal.
Crystal Balls or whatever her name is.
Crystal.
Excellent.
Excellent.
There is such a good, good feeling I get from these young people, smart people.
And here's the thing.
Let me explain something to you.
And you may not like this.
Because you know why?
Because you're demented.
And that's why you're listening to me.
Because you're demented and you're a bunch of right-wing fossils.
You're a bunch of right-wingers and you're some Trump lunatic and that's the way it is!
I want to hear, I love to hear, tell me a rational progressive person.
Now you're going to say there's no such thing.
Yes, there are.
Absolutely.
I want to hear what they have to say.
I want to hear everything.
See, you may not like that.
You may say, I want to hear the same drum.
No, no, no, no.
I like shows.
I like perspectives.
When I will find something that is so interesting, I'm thinking, this is interesting.
All of a sudden, I'm finding and with YouTube, it'll be what am I trying to say?
Police video stuff.
There's a group, one of the funniest groups, I'm telling you, you can't do regular TV, you could do cable.
Three, I don't know, they're sisters, or they know each other, but there are three lesbians.
I guess they're called gay women.
Absolutely.
Biting sense of humor, no pun intended.
And it's not...
It's, for some reason, it works.
Sometimes, anytime somebody says to me, or I see somebody says, this is gay humor, black humor, female humor, anytime they hit you over the head, certain things work.
And all I know is this.
I would say, that's good, that's not.
That team works, that one doesn't.
He's good, she's good, he's got it, she doesn't.
I don't know what it is.
Let me also tell you something.
I cannot believe, and I don't know what happened to me, but I think that comedy, I don't know if I lost the ability to like it, but Dave Chappelle I thought was so good, and now he talks, so he's getting kind of older, and he's just, I don't know.
I'm not hearing it.
The other one, too, is Ron White.
You know, one of the Redneck series?
This is a guy who...
I think he's finally...
I think he's retiring.
And they're going to Joe Rogan's comedy club.
He's a guy who talks like this.
He said, you know, you can...
If you're...
If you're...
I'm trying to be...
Family show.
Hang down to the ground.
You can go to a doctor and get it fixed.
If your belly's hanging down on the floor, you can get a tummy tuck.
See?
And look like a washboard abs of a cheerleader.
If you can't see, they got that LASIK and that laser surgery.
They can actually transplant a lens.
If you can't hear, they can do a cochlear implant.
But there's no cure for stupid.
Excuse me.
Am I...
Did I miss something?
Where is this great comedy?
It's the...
I don't know where it is.
You know who I actually kind of like?
Amy Schumer when she busts the balls of...
Did you see when she went after...
Who's the one married to Keith Urban?
The Brit married to Tom Cruise, the Australian?
Nicole Kidman.
I kind of like it, but she's brutal.
And in a weird way, in a weird way, kind of funny.
I know what I like.
I know what's good.
If you told me right now, what would be the worst thing you could do?
Go to a football game?
You want to go to Giants Stadium or whatever it is, or go up into this?
I don't care if it's a box.
I don't care if it's a suite.
I don't care what it is.
No things.
No things.
No, no, no.
How about go to a comedy club?
Oh, God, no.
Oh, my God.
I don't get it.
I don't understand what it is.
I'm not a big laugher, but sometimes I'll say, that is brilliant.
Dimitri Martin was great.
When Pryor first started, I shouldn't say first started, but I grew up with Richard Pryor when he was starting off.
I remember seeing him on Steve Allen.
Steve Martin, when he first was so...
Just very unique.
There were some other...
I love people who are just...
Mitch...
What's his name?
Mitch...
You know what I'm talking about.
Mitch Hedberg.
I think Mitch Hedberg was a genius.
And Mitch Hedberg, if I went to see Mitch Hedberg, I probably wouldn't laugh one time.
I'd say, that's me.
That's my ultimate compliment.
That's good.
That was good.
Do I laugh?
No.
The last time I ever laughed at a comedian was Robert Klein, who...
He despises me because of my politics, but he was my hero going, I thought Child of the 50s was the greatest thing I've ever heard in my life.
It killed me.
Killed me that it was the funniest thing I've ever actually laughed.
Bill Cosby was mesmerizing the storytelling.
Bill Cosby could tell stories.
Richard Pryor could tell stories with accents and new voices.
Dave Chappelle when he started.
Dave Chappelle.
Dave Chappelle was genius.
Genius.
And it was, yes, it was race and stuff, but it was clever.
And there was something to this.
And I remember that.
I thought there were just these really...
Have you heard this woman now?
She's to talk like that.
She says, I came home and my daughter said, I'm pregnant again!
And there are people that are laughing.
I don't know what the hell her name is.
She is this corn bone.
Oh my God.
Have you ever seen comedians who sit around and laugh at each other and just laugh to the point where they're going to throw up?
And you're thinking, am I missing something here?
Do they just do this?
Because when you're a comedian, you have to, and you have a comedian.
So then I walked out, and he pooped.
I'm thinking, am I missing?
Why are you laughing this much?
You're a comedian.
Jerry Seinfeld, comedians in cars driving coffee, whatever the hell.
What is this?
And I'm going to say something to you, and I have no idea how I got on this subject.
Don't ask me.
I don't know how I got on this, but I don't know.
I just ended up on this.
Life's like that.
The most overrated, he was funny, had his moments.
Norm MacDonald, I don't know who they're talking about.
They talk about Norm MacDonald like the funniest.
Wait a minute.
Is there another Norm MacDonald?
I mean, he was good, but what are you talking about?
Oh, no, no, no, no.
In the pantheon, Norm MacDonald is the funniest.
Gilbert Godfrey.
Oh, my God.
What are you...
I don't get it.
And, of course, if you die, well, forget it.
Remember when...
Who was the guy that died in Orlando with that funny thing with the headboard?
What was his name?
Bob Saget.
When Bob Saget...
Oh, my God!
Bob Saget!
No words!
Oh my god!
Who?
Bob Saget?
Wait a minute.
Have I been in a coma?
What is the matter with you?
Everything's over the top.
People are so they've lost.
They think that funny is filthy or a gimmick or an attitude or...
I don't know.
I swear to god, I don't know.
So, suffice it to say, You can take all of them.
I don't know who's good.
I have no interest in listening to somebody tell me, oh, you know who's very good?
And I've been saying this, Brett Ernst.
You know why?
It's the subject matter.
And I gave him one of those.
You know who makes me sick?
What's his name?
Sebastian Maniska.
Oh, God.
His name is Sebastian, right?
Sebastian Maniska.
Oh, my God.
Being a wordsmith yourself, what do you think of Carlin?
I think there was never anything like him ever in the...
I have heard, and I'm telling you right now, I never liked, by the way, thank you, Fox.
I never cared for his comment.
I know what you're saying.
When I was in high school, everybody remembered the seven dirty words.
Memorize.
We loved to memorize things.
We would memorize.
And we'd go around and say, can you say that?
Yes, I can say that.
Remember, are you old enough to remember the...
Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onion on a sesame seed bite.
Whoa!
You know the McDonald's one?
What is the matter with you?
Can you recite Shakespeare?
No, but I can do the McDonald's commercial and we would want to remember that.
His story, the best thing he ever did was when he tells his story about how he came about.
How Danny Kaye affected him and how he just...
Changed his life.
There were people who are...
There was a...
Let me see.
There was a wonderful piece.
Where was this?
I'm trying to think.
I was listening to some great...
I was doing some...
Private channel.
And I was doing some great music that I wish I could go back and I wish people would pay attention to.
It was too late right now.
Earl Thomas Conley.
Earl Thomas Conley sang like nobody else.
Have you heard Eva or Ava Cassidy?
Incredible.
Absolutely.
Positively.
Incredible.
Incredible.
Died tragically, 33 years old.
Nick Drake.
Nick Drake is, I think, the greatest.
I mean, so good.
It's not even...
I mean, he was just phenomenally incredible.
And there were these people that I thought never really got their say, so to speak.
They never got their say.
They just never really...
Jimmy Buffett was loved, but for the wrong reason.
But did anybody ever hear Tom Lehrer poisoning pigeons in the park and elements and the elements?
Check out Tom.
I did a piece today.
I did a tribute to Tom Lehrer.
This guy, I think he's alive today.
He is so brilliant that when you hear what he sings and hear what he did, You're overwhelmed.
You're just like this.
Brilliant.
I've never...
I'm from a different planet.
If I could just...
Thank God there aren't people like me in an audience.
If Tom Lehrer were in his prime now, I would just be sitting staring.
I can't believe it.
I hear sometimes people do things and I'm so moved by how genius they are.
Johnny Mercer, his lyrics, I can't believe anybody wrote that.
They're brilliant.
I watched them.
I watched Spencer Tracy act.
I'm thinking, are you watching this?
I've never seen anything like this.
That's my idea of greatness.
But for me to sit and go, oh.
Do you remember when Steve Allen created the Tonight Show, created that format?
Do you remember that?
He invented the couch, and this, and the routines, and the man on the street.
Steve Allen was a genius.
They say he wrote 3,000 songs, but he didn't.
Remember that?
Do you remember?
Do you remember what Jack Parr did?
Where would they be today?
Where is this?
I don't want to bring up names.
Because anybody who's doing a podcast, God bless them.
But there are some people I simply cannot watch.
And they're very popular.
I just can't.
And then I'll come across somebody that is so seemingly bad, but brilliant.
There's some kind of a connection.
I don't know what it is.
I can't explain it.
And I don't know if we have anybody out there.
Truly, truly.
Let me ask you a question.
What is it that makes Joe Rogan great?
Joe Rogan is without a doubt today the number one, the preeminent podcaster.
Why do you think that is?
Number one, because they tell you who he is.
Mass begets mass.
A million, 15 million whatever views will pull in 15 million views.
Just will.
It just does.
Because of the metrics and because of this...
Number two, he's very good because what he does, better than anybody, is he has this incredible sense of awe.
When he's interested in something, nobody is more interested than Joe Rogan.
And I love that.
It can be the most obscure thing.
When it's filthy, it's filthy his base.
But the thing about it, and I'm telling you right now, the number one, because I was watching him the other day, I'm saying, what does this guy have?
What is it?
You believe him.
There's something you connect and say, you know what?
I just like this guy.
I don't know why.
I just like him.
I like him.
He's...
You wouldn't mind talking to him.
If you were sitting and you were waiting to get your car fixed and you were in the service bay and Joe Rogan, you know who he was and he was sitting next to him.
You probably...
And you were...
He'd probably be like a nice guy.
There's something human about him.
Imagine sitting next to Ben Shapiro.
Oh, God.
Candace Owens.
Oh, no.
I don't know why.
Oh, no, no.
Other people are very nice.
Theo Vaughn.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's the thing.
I can't explain it to you.
Johnny Carson.
Can you figure out Johnny Carson?
I watched it today.
It was the most stupid show anybody's ever seen.
What did we watch?
Johnny Carson died in the UK because they didn't understand that he laughed.
They laughed.
We laughed when his jokes bottom.
He did the T for two.
They didn't understand that.
Graham Norton show?
It's good for five minutes, then I get bored.
Oh, he laughs all the time.
He excessively laughs.
I got it.
Boring!
But they love it.
I don't...
Jack Parr, genius.
Jack Parr, genius.
A tribute, tribute, tribute, tribute, tribute, tribute that I'm so sorry I never got the chance to meet him was Jack Parr.
When I first came to New York, Jack Parr, Regis Philbin, and Charles Grodin.
I think they were in Connecticut or Greenwich or something, but they listened to me and they all liked what I did.
I thought that was the greatest compliment in the world.
Greatest compliment.
Jack Parr?
Jack Parr?
Nobody liked Jack Parr.
Nobody.
So what I'm trying to tell you, my friends, who are the great...
You know what, Bob Dennison?
Bob Dennison talks about Bill Hicks.
You know, Bill Hicks was wonderful by virtue of his message.
But did Bill Hicks ever make you laugh?
Was Bill Hicks funny?
He was angry.
He was poignant.
Lenny Bruce...
When Lenny Bruce was Lenny Bruce, when he was just doing straight-up comedy, absolutely great.
Really great.
Let me tell you something.
I saw a guy one time, I was at the Friars Club, two people that I thought, you've got to see.
Our dear friend who passed away, and I mean, we talked to him almost, almost to the day before he died.
Pat Cooper.
Pat Cooper was...
Pat Cooper was Pat Cooper.
There was only one person like that.
Pat Cooper, Freddie Roman, was a master.
And Dick Capri.
Dick Capri could tell a joke like nobody's business.
He had a...
It was like an artist.
You know who was a great joke teller?
Phoebe Snow.
Could do it perfectly.
And she was a woman.
It's very rare.
Tell a joke.
The beginning, set it up.
You gotta act.
You gotta act a little bit.
You know when you tell the joke?
So the doctor walks in and says, well what the?
You just can't go on and say it.
The storytelling?
Dead.
Gone.
Finished.
Jackie Vernon killed me.
Jackie Vernon told a joke when I was a kid.
Miles Bergo.
I saw it on Merv Griffin, and I was a kid, and I thought it was the funniest thing because I never saw it coming.
I never saw it coming.
I'm not going to tell you this.
I'm from another planet.
I recognize the fact.
I know what you're saying.
You're going to say, this poor guy, he's...
I don't fit in here.
I don't fit in.
I was listening to a...
Firing line with William F. Buckley and Steve Allen debating the death penalty.
I loved it.
And Steve Allen felt so outranked.
You could see it.
He wasn't comfortable.
Steve Allen always said...
I interviewed Steve Allen one time on the air.
He wrote a book called Dumpf.
It was horrible.
It was just because he was Steve Allen.
And he was so smart.
And I wanted to hear Steve Allen.
And instead I got this other guy.
Anyway.
Greatest guy in the world.
Nicest man.
Best interview I ever did in my life.
Seriously?
Ed McMahon.
We talked over an hour.
Never mentioned Johnny Carson one time.
I never brought his name up one time.
One of the nicest people.
Interesting about being in the Marines.
With Marilyn Monroe and how he broke in.
So many people are fascinating.
Did you ever watch David Susskind?
Watch that show.
Watch that show.
If you want to hear something, go back and listen to any old Bob Grant.
Bob Grant was one of these.
He was horrible.
He would say things.
How he got away with this for that long.
I have no idea.
He's one of the kings of conservative talk, where you want to call it that.
And he, I mean, he would say stuff that's just, where are you from?
What?
Where are you from?
Why don't you wash my car?
I'm like, oh my god!
He would just...
He would call David Dinkins the men's room attendant.
I mean, he would be indicted.
And then one day, the world, they said, that's it.
And I remember the moment, I remember when they, it was about the Ron Brown joke.
And I was listening.
I said, that's it.
And they got him.
They got him.
It was just, history caught up with him and there he was.
It just didn't work anymore.
One of the nicest people you've ever met.
You can't believe how nice he was.
Can't believe how nice he was.
But one of the pioneers.
You see what I'm saying?
Ed Aruda says, I listened to Bob Grant up to his retirement.
Bob Grant was, I'm telling you, he was just in terms of his history.
Out of respect for his memory, I could tell you some idiosyncrasies Bob had that I don't think would be appropriate now, but I think are...
He was just incredible.
Rush Limbaugh, nicest person you've ever met.
Shy.
But most people...
Do you know I've never listened to a Rush Limbaugh show?
Never listened to a Sean Hannity show.
Never heard a Howard Stern show.
Never heard a...
I love my friend Opie.
I mean Opie.
Anthony.
Oh my god.
Strike that.
Anthony Cumia.
I never heard his show one time.
Never.
I don't like radio shows.
I don't like them.
Never liked them.
Never liked listening to radio shows.
But I loved anything on the weekends.
And I loved anything of people who were sitting on the weekends trying to sell something or some bad...
There was a show right now.
There was a station that was off the...
It just went off the air fairly recently.
Had some of the worst program you've ever heard.
Some good stuff, but some really bad.
And it was so good because it was local.
People who really shouldn't be together.
I wish I could tell you something.
I can't.
But I wish I could.
Because you would...
I don't know if you think they were funny, but you, like me, would be...
If you like weird behavior, because some of the strangest people I've ever met in my life are in radio.
And remember what I'm saying.
The strangest of the strange.
The strangest are radio engineers.
Anybody who works in the engineering department?
Remember, if there's any serial killer, first place, bring in all the engineers of every radio station.
They are from another planet.
Take a quick story.
We had a guy, I'm not going to mention his name, but...
He was at a big station.
And there's one thing that you never want.
In a radio station, if you hear dead air, because the speaker's on all the time.
And believe it or not, it's to make sure you're on the air.
It's not so that people can say, hey, we can listen.
It's almost like to listen.
To listen to.
And for whatever it's worth, we...
I forget what it was.
It just went dead.
And people said, and they went to the engineer and go, Bill!
We're off the air!
That is the, that's DEFCON 1. And Bill said, you know, it's probably, and he does this radio, you know, it's the Fisteris modulator.
Fix it!
I'll tell you one last story.
We had a radio station where you could pick up this phone.
You dial nine pound, and you can say, Jerry, call me.
You know, whatever.
You could do a speaker.
So let's say there's a guy named Ed Page, let's just say.
I would pick up the phone and say, Ed Page, pick up, and hang up.
And Ed Page would say, pick up what?
I'd wait a little bit, maybe a day later.
Ed Page, pick up.
And I could hear this in the way down the hall.
Pick up what?
Then I said, Ed Page, line five.
There's no line.
This went on.
And I finally heard him yell.
And people knew it was me.
But he yelled, who is this?
This went on.
Anyway, I thought that was funny.
You may not think that's funny.
I like to torment people.
I one time had a sign on my door.
Apartment door.
There was a little people.
There was a sign that said, do not knock.
My friend was coming over.
I said, do not knock.
So he's like this.
Or ring the bell.
And I'm looking through it.
And he said, hey!
He starts yelling.
Hey!
People, doors open up.
Why is this guy yelling?
And he said, there's a sign that says...
And I started laughing.
I said, why'd you do that?
He says, I have no idea.
He didn't see the joke right away.
I thought it was hysterically funny.
But that's me.
I've had enough of you.
I've had enough of all this today.
I'm done.
Are you done?
I'm done.
Okay?
You're good people, you know that?
You mean well.
We enjoy our time together.
I don't know what to say about the impeachment other than I'm not getting my hopes up, but it's okay.
It's something.
I don't have much faith for this country at all, but I'm trying.
I'm doing the best I can.
By the way, can I just say, you know, Christmas is around the corner, did I tell you that?
And there's no better way to say I love you to somebody you love, especially this Yuletide season.
They're going to mypillow.com promo code Lionel.
Every day is Christmas.
Call up.
Call 800-645-4965.
Give your credit card number.
Buy everything they have.
And just hand out pillows to people you know.
You'll make friends.
Give them a nice, you know, a duvet.
Maybe a quilt.
Something to be nice.
Pillows, slippers.
Friends.
You'll make friends for life.
MyPillow.com, promo code Lionel.
MyPillow.com, promo code Lionel.
All right, dear friends, have a great and glorious day.
Thank you so much for your kindness.
Thank you so much.
And who was kind today?
Well, that was simple.
That was Silver Fox.
Silver Fox was kind to me.
The rest of you, you can rot in hell as far as I'm concerned.
I am kidding, of course.
I'm kidding.
Silver, thank you so much for this.
Alright, dear friends, have a great and glorious day.
See you tomorrow.
Same bad time, same bad channel.
8 a.m.
Please be there.
And don't forget these words.
The monkey's dead.
The show's over.
Sue ya.
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