Face It, What You Knew As Fox News Is Dead, Through and Over
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I don't watch Fox News.
I don't care about Fox News.
Whatever they want to do is fine with me.
I haven't watched Fox News or any cable news show other than for...
A minimal amount of time just to see really nothing.
Cable news is dead.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
I don't care.
Left, right, middle, it doesn't matter.
It's dead.
But Fox News is the ultimate casualty.
And it's not just about Fox News.
It's the alleged, the so-called, the putative conservative message also, which has been lost.
Lost in the crossfire.
Let me explain what this means.
But first, you know the drill.
I have to do this.
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And I appreciate it immensely.
Look, it goes something like this.
I remember when Roger Ailes created Fox News and it was genius.
But it wasn't just Fox News.
It was the platform.
The official statement of the conservative Republican Party, if you will.
I came along during the time of Rush Limbaugh.
That's when I got my bones.
I worked with Rush at WABC.
I was there from the beginning when talk radio was it and nobody, but nobody before or after or since even came close to Rush Limbaugh.
Period.
Period.
With all due respect, Howard Stern was okay, but that's not necessarily political talk radio, but he was very big too.
So, whatever he is now, whatever this shell of a relic he is today, that's a different story.
But, but, but, but, let me explain to you what I'm talking about now.
Fox News was the voice, the spirit, the heart, the message, the platform.
Of what was the conservative Republican movement, GOP.
Before CPAC, before all this other stuff, it was solidified.
It was constant.
It was consistent.
Today, it is complete and total...
I don't know what you want to call it.
And I can't blame Murdoch and the boys.
I can't blame them.
Murdoch's probably thinking, no, these are different times.
I'm a billionaire today because I move with the flow.
I'm making more money on NASCAR or this or football.
I don't need this.
It's a different time.
The shadow government's in charge.
They got rid of, they bounced Tucker because Tucker just, Tucker thought, Tucker thought he was Tucker.
Tucker thought, I can say whatever I want.
He was kind of like, Glenn Beck did that.
Remember that?
Glenn Beck, when he was pulling off these phony iterations and versions of Alex Jones.
Remember when Glenn was doing his chalkboard?
I mean, it was good, but it was a rip-off of AJ.
We all know this.
Tucker started to get off into this thing where I'm different and I'm going to interview Orban.
I'm going to go to Hungary.
What?
What?
I'm against the war.
You're what?
And as far as vaccine goes, okay, that's enough.
Now we're doing it.
So remember the old expression, pick the hill you want to die on.
Tucker did it.
He picked the hill and he died on it.
It's that simple.
We're not going to spend our time because we don't know anything about what happened with Dominion.
But all I know is everybody's happy now that he's gone and Tucker's doing whatever he is.
And that's why Fox News is this watered down, milquetoast, nonsense.
It's just this.
Oh, we don't even bother.
I saw a shot the other day of one of their...
Somebody sent it to me.
I don't know what it was.
They're five or the four or whatever the hell this thing is called.
It looked like outtakes from the Barbie movie.
What is this?
What are you doing?
Are you going what?
You're not going into the bimbet league, are you?
I can't tell, but I'm looking at this because this does not look like a serious conservative Republican GOP stronghold.
This sounds like nonsense.
And it's this play it safe stuff.
You know who's a genius?
I've got to tell you something right now.
The genius on Fox News always has been Sean Hannity.
Hannity, anybody lucky enough to follow Rush and follow O 'Reilly?
That's the luckiest guy.
In the whole USA, as Donna Fargo may intone.
Or might intone.
I mean, this guy is beautiful.
And he's still there.
You know why?
Because he stays in his lane.
No hits, no runs, no errors.
He's a genius.
He never gets caught up in anything other than playing the safe, easy, usual Hillary bleach bit.
By the way, when he gets on that bleach bit thing, oh dear God.
He might not do this.
I haven't seen this in years.
He would get on this thing where he'd say bleach bit like $75,000.
I think he was...
Doing endorsements for a police, but every time he says it.
But that's in the past.
And he gets Tulsi Gabbard, who does, you know, the Yvonne DeCarlo, the Lily Munster.
And I believe that freedom.
Thank you very much.
You know, there's no, no scheisse obviousness.
Thank you very much.
And the usual suspects.
And you bring on Newt Gingrich?
Oh, my God.
Dust off the usual suspects.
And Kevin McCarthy, I know, I know, I know.
You got the laptop.
I know.
You're going to impeach him.
And there's a double standard.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nothing happens.
It's just...
And when Greg Gutbucket is leading the show and Jesse Watt, look.
Listen, God bless him.
It's a new era.
But hard-hitting.
Hard, rough and tumble, really good, exciting, dangerous conservative or right-wing or political talk.
That's over with.
I mean, it is so over, it's not even funny.
It's just the same.
Studio audiences, anything we can please.
That's over.
Look, everything has its day.
And the reason why it can't go on is because Murdoch doesn't want it the same way that he had it with Alec, with Ailes.
Ailes was a genius.
Ailes was a bona fide genius.
One time Ailes purportedly says, I don't know if it's true, but I love this line.
And I always attribute it to him.
They said, do you need a license to be a broadcaster or to be a journalist?
He says, you only need a license to cut hair.
I love that.
That's over with.
Sayonara.
Adios.
See you later.
Gone.
Done.
Finished.
It's through.
It's done.
This iteration of this once exciting talk.
Too much trouble.
Now here's the news.
Where do you go?
Here!
The most exciting, the most invigorating, the most scintillating, the most absolute, the greatest Talk and conversation and analysis ever.
Where is it?
It's being streamed.
It's citizen, civilian, alternative, and foreign media with names and websites and people you don't know.
Some people sitting there interviewing somebody in their bedroom with an unmade bed behind them is more compelling, more interesting, more raw, more true, more legitimate, more limpid, pellucid, more vibrant, and accurate.
Accurate and dangerous and excoriating.
And it's wonderful.
That's where it is.
This cable is done.
Look, I'm old enough in my generation.
I've been through every...
I remember when we went, when eight tracks were considered interesting.
And then that went away.
And then there was 45 before that.
And then there was LPs.
And then there was CDs.
And DVDs.
And the computer.
I went through all this stuff.
And it was a wonderful time to live and to grow up because I could see so many iterations of change.
But what I'm really good at is I can see when things are dying, when they're morbid, when there's morbidity and mortality and there's that feculent, putrid, putrescent scent of death and rotting.
And that's what this is.
And what's interesting is they still...
Keep it up!
They still...
Let me tell you something.
You can say what you want about Tucker.
Tucker's a spoiled brat.
He's stuck up.
You know, whatever.
But man, he made Fox exciting.
And two last things, Sparky, too.
Tucker is bringing people from the right towards the middle.
And I'm using these directional references because they seem to resonate.
Or resignate, as somebody once said.
He's pulling people from the right, and Bobby Kennedy's pulling people from the left.
And my dream, if there is a God, which I doubt, if there is an interventionist, loving, good God, which I doubt, because I tend to be religious, there will be a third-party movement.
And the ultimate, which would completely destroy everything, is Bobby Kennedy and Tucker Carlson.
You can say goodbye to it.
I don't care who it is because right now, as it stands, Gavin Newsom is going to be the next president because they're going to yank Pops.
They're going to get rid of Carmelita and they're going to put in Gavin and Gretchen Whitmer.
Watch how this is done.
But with a Bobby third party, look at what Cornel West is doing.
Cornel West is making more sense than he's ever made.
I don't know what the hell he's talking about.
My brother!
I love him.
But it makes sense!
Ron Paul makes sense!
Bernie Sanders made sense!
Oh yes!
It's a new world!
So look, Fox News, thank you.
It was great when it was there, but it's done.
It's finished.
You are vaudeville.
You are disco.
You are flared pants and bell bottoms.
You are Rula Lenska.
It's done, baby!
Stick a fork in it.
Say goodnight, Gracie.
All right, kids.
Thank you so much for watching.
Have a great and glorious day.
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