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June 23, 2023 - Lionel Nation
33:24
Please Explain the OceanGate Titanic Sub Trip

Gallows "humour."

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*snap*
I want to ask you a very serious question.
And I don't want you to, in any way, take this the wrong way.
But I want to ask you this question.
Could you please explain to me the Ocean Gate Titanic sub-trip?
It's a terrible thing.
Human beings lost.
You don't need me to tell you that.
I think you understand that.
It goes without saying.
Who wants to go on this thing?
What are you seeing?
I heard you don't even...
You don't look at a...
You see a...
Like a camera or something.
You're in this tiny thing.
There's no room.
You're claustrophobic.
It takes two and a half hours.
You've got a glow stick.
Can you please explain this to me?
I'm not talking about the coverage.
Did you see, what was it, on News Nation?
They had a countdown.
They had that Ashley Banfield.
Remember Ashley Banfield?
Put your glasses back on.
That was the thing that you were known for.
Put your glasses on.
Anyway, she's on there.
They had a timer.
Countdown to the oxygen depletion.
Tacky!
But maybe somebody saw it.
I bet you more people saw that.
Because nobody knows it's there.
Can you believe this is a countdown to when they're expecting to lose the oxygen?
You know how tacky that is?
Does that word tacky mean anything to anybody anymore?
Does anybody recognize the word tacky?
Does it bother you?
Is there any class in the world?
Does that make any sense?
Who...
Why would you want to do it?
What are you seeing?
Forget the fact of it sounding very dangerous to me.
It's boring!
Two and a half hours to see what?
What am I seeing?
I don't understand it.
I'm going to go one step further.
Oh, I tell people this and they think I'm crazy.
Remember the scene from the Griswolds when they go see the Grand Canyon?
Like, well...
There it is.
There it is.
I'm going to say something, and I know you're going to think I'm crazy, but I'm going to say this.
People who go to see the Eiffel Tower, if you're going to go, go to Paris.
Go see stuff.
Go eat.
Do whatever you want.
That's great.
But the Eiffel Tower.
Yep.
That's it.
I'm not going to go up there.
No way.
That's it, alright.
Just like I expected it.
Yep.
Yep.
I don't get it.
I mean, you've got to take a picture of it.
Okay, I was there.
But you should say, I was in Paris.
That's one thing.
But taking a picture of that damn thing and saying, what is my version of it going to be different?
To prove that I went?
Nobody else went?
It doesn't exist until I take a picture of it?
Ooh la la, here I am.
There it is.
Okay.
Yep.
That's it, alright.
That's the Eiffel Tower.
Yep.
Huh?
How about Mount Rushmore?
You want to go see Mount Rushmore?
No.
I've seen Mount Rushmore.
Show me a picture of it.
Yep.
That's it.
That's Mount Rushmore.
You want to go there?
No.
No.
Not really.
What do you want to see?
I want to go to the cities, but I don't want to just go see something.
I don't want to just see...
Does this make any sense?
Am I the only one...
Before we get back to this sub-thing, which I don't...
You're billionaires?
Millionaires?
And they say, well, you don't understand.
The money that's...
They have so much money, they need to get...
They need new periods of excitement.
This is boring!
To be a little suppository and a drop?
What is the...
This is stupid!
Again, tragedy.
I understand it.
I don't understand why people...
I just...
What are you...
What is it?
What...
Why do people do this?
Now, I will tell you something.
If you want to do something, and I did this thing twice, if you do want to do something, and you really want to say...
Okay, I want to try something.
Do a tandem skydiving, free fall.
Do the tandem first.
I did the AFF level one solo, the second one.
Then I started realizing, oh, I see what can go wrong now.
Oh, I get it.
I didn't see it at first, but now I get it.
Okay, I did it.
Thank you.
I did it.
Let me tell you something.
If you want to really, really Really understand what your adrenaline can do.
You've never felt this before.
You've never.
And I probably never do it.
It's like a drug.
The first time you take a drug.
From what I've read, the first time it's like, wow!
Second time you're chasing it.
You know, you're trying to chase that first feeling.
I was in a place called Zephyr Hills, Florida.
And it was called Phoenix.
I think it was Phoenix.
I don't know where it was.
It was part of a radio promotion.
And I've got my picture with a South African dude.
And I was going to have a helmet with a microphone.
I was going to try to call.
Don't ask me.
And that wouldn't have worked because you can't talk.
You can't talk when you do this.
So we're in this DC-3.
I think it's DC-3.
The one that's on an angle.
And you're...
They have the regular, not even a door, it's just open.
And when you get into this, there's no seats, there's no nothing, and there's a painting in the back of it that says, check your gear.
And I said, what does that mean?
Check your gear.
And people are sticking their hand down their pants.
I said, what is this gear business?
Well, that's an expression.
Check your gear is to make sure you move your male accoutrement.
Move the boys over because you have two straps that are right there.
And if there's a little bit of a, you know, you might want to just, you know, make an adjustment.
You got that?
It's one thing to be trans folks.
Are you sure you want to do this now?
Sure you want to do this?
Okay.
Alright.
It's a whole other thing.
It's a whole other thing.
If you want, I guess you could have artificial.
Kulione added, but keep in mind.
Keep in mind.
And also remember one thing too.
If you really want to get authentic, make sure you get them when you're aged.
It has a whole other thing.
You know what I mean?
It takes on a whole new life with a little bit of gravity.
I'm not going to go into detail, but men, you know what I'm talking about.
You know what I'm talking about.
So I got into this thing and they said, Hi, how are you?
I got this South African guy.
So he's got his rig on.
He's got a big chute for two of us.
Makes sense, right?
Big!
So I had on a harness.
And I clip onto the back of him.
Actually, he clips onto me.
He's in my back.
I don't have anything.
So we're all sitting in this jet.
No, not a jet.
It's a plane with a prop in it.
Even when they started, the thing shakes and it blows off the oil and it's smoky.
It's really not feel good.
Anyway.
But I'm not going to back down.
We're on this thing.
And I'm with my fellow radio people and I'm not going to back down.
Because I'm going to go.
I'm going to do it.
And we're sitting there with our legs like this.
One guy in front of you like this.
So there I am.
And we have an altimeter.
Put it right there.
Put it on your wrist and put it on your finger.
Right there.
You look at it.
We went to 13,500 feet.
It took forever.
I was glad just to get out of this damn thing.
We're going 1,000.
Okay.
It's one of those things.
5, 10, 13,000.
And then I get this.
I say, yeah?
Can I help you?
Let's go.
And that's when it hits you.
Let's go.
We're going to do this.
Up until now, it's all been pretty much theoretical.
We're going to do this.
And people are just jumping.
They're running out.
They're just tumbling, the real pros, because this place, they had the best.
Oh my God, in Florida, the skydivers, they're great.
Golden Knights are one thing, but these guys are just, they do this all day long.
Pack their own shoots, do all this stuff.
They just all day long.
And there's no fancy.
They just do tumbles.
So there I am, moving up, teetering up.
I'm up to the door.
He's clicking on.
He's behind me.
He's on me.
I said, you sure you got this?
I said, yep.
Okay.
And we kind of waddle over to the door.
So he kind of pushes me out and I thought, hey!
And I thought, what am I going to do?
I'm going to fall?
It was so stupid.
I said, you know, I almost fell.
Fell?
You're going to fall, alright.
You see nothing.
Nothing.
And it's loud.
Even with this helmet thing on.
I'm wondering, what good is a helmet?
I can see if I'm in the, you know, the remains of my...
Whatever my smashed remains.
I said, you know what?
Had he only worn a helmet.
So anyway, I'm sticking my head out, and it is so loud.
Do you ever stick your head out of a plane?
Huh?
It's freezing.
And it's loud, and it's, you know, you're making a kind of Craig Breedlove phrase.
You're sticking your head out.
And he's behind me, and he's pushing me, and I'm just dangling.
He's got this thing, and I'm just, I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm kind of on an angle, but I'm out the plane.
I can see the propellers, and I can see the whole thing.
I'm out of the plane.
I said, this is, and you're not thinking.
That's the best part.
You're not processing anything.
It's just, you're watching it.
Sort of.
Maybe.
And then he goes, ready?
One!
I can hear him count.
True!
It's going to...
And then out we go.
Now, I got to tell you, I remember that.
Because you're kind of processing it.
I'm now flying.
You're not falling.
You're flying.
You don't feel falling.
The ground isn't coming up.
You're just...
So he's behind you, and you're...
You're like this.
Now the idea is that you want to bend the part of your umbilicus right there.
You want to bend it like a nose cone versus a leaf where you'll just...
So you want to have the first part maybe almost like a missile, like a nose cone.
You want to bend and you're falling.
But you don't feel like you're falling.
You're just...
I don't know what you are.
Flying?
Now, there's a guy who's following me down.
This is the guy with the camera.
Somewhere, there's this video of this, but this guy flies down and he's in front of me and he's catching.
This guy's the best.
They have these trackers, these folks who, in case you, let's say you do one of these two ways, three ways, you get hit.
Somebody's knocked out and you're falling.
A couple of things are interesting.
One, you have an altimeter here.
Not an altimeter, but this little...
Gauge.
It realizes barometric pressure.
If you're falling too fast, it realizes you're knocked out or something, so it will activate the chute for you.
You have a reserve in the front, one here, and you...
Big orange, big, big, big orange...
Well, for yours.
For the first time, it's this big orange handle.
You can't throw it away.
If you throw it away, you've got to buy a case of beer or something.
You've got to stick it in your...
Whatever.
It's flying.
It is...
There's no...
I don't know what.
I'm flying.
I'm processing.
I've got goggles on.
I'm just like this.
It's not saying anything.
It's too loud.
Then when he realizes, okay, now we're at the thing.
He pulls the ripcord.
Not the ripcord, but the...
It opens up.
You look up.
There's different cells.
The cells are the individual little pockets that fill with air.
You grab the toggles.
A couple of flares.
Good!
We're doing great.
It's open.
Looks healthy.
Now we're directional.
It's like an aileron.
We're going about 25 miles an hour.
Here's the best part.
It is so quiet.
I'm like talking to them like this.
It's about making known there's no noise.
No, nothing.
No noise.
We're just talking.
You could come behind somebody.
They wouldn't be able to, they wouldn't hear you.
But here's the feeling.
As I looked through, as I looked down, and thank God I checked my gear, as I looked down, and I see the two straps, see my feet.
I swear I'm going to slide through this.
I felt like I'm just going to slip through this.
But I'm not.
But I just looked at it.
It's the weirdest feeling.
I said, am I going to?
Don't ask me more.
I'm not even talking.
I can't even talk.
I'm saying nothing.
Yeah, right.
Adrenaline hasn't really hit me yet.
He says, okay, now we're getting near.
He's explaining it to me.
He says, now remember.
Remember where we took off?
Okay.
Now, they have a lot of phosphate.
Around Zephyr Hills, they have phosphate, these big phosphate plants.
So you look for the wind.
You say, where's the wind going?
You want to go against the wind.
So you look for signs of smoke.
You'll see that smoke over there?
I said, I'm doing it!
Yeah, there is.
So he's trying to figure it.
And we land.
He says, now, when you land, he says, don't look down.
Because it throws you off.
Look at the horizon.
Because you want to flare at the last moment.
Right before you hit, you want to flare.
So you kind of raise up a little bit, and you land just like stepping off a curb.
Except for me, my legs are just paralyzed.
I can't even move.
I'm just a glob of nothing.
But it's very interesting, because if you look down, you swear, like, I'm going to hit.
You're like 50 feet above, but you can't tell.
If you look straight up, you see, oh, now you see.
Now I see where I am.
And we landed and I just, my legs were like, remember those little toys where you would push the bottom of them and they would kind of fall over and then snap to?
It looked like me when you pushed down, depressed the bottom.
I was just...
I'm speaking a language.
I have so much adrenaline.
So much...
Adrenaline.
I'm high.
I can't even talk.
I can't even talk.
I feel like I could fight Tyson or break doors down.
I'm serious.
It was weird.
Later on, I said, do women feel like this?
Is this a testosterone thing?
What is this?
I don't know.
It was wild.
We went to a place.
Afterwards called the Proud Lion on Bush Boulevard.
No, no.
What am I saying?
I think.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And we were pounding them just to calm down.
I mean, pounding.
Nothing worked.
I swear to you, it was hours before that came down.
This must be what?
I don't want to compare it to war.
I don't want to compare it to war, but I will say It was...
I've never felt anything like that in my life.
Absolutely the most incredible thing.
They say, hey, you punched the clouds, like all this stuff.
I got my picture.
Remind me next time I'll show you a picture of it.
I'm the guy from the...
the guy who was following us.
I did it the second time and I had a...
A walkie-talkie here in the flight suit.
So they went out with me to make sure I was okay.
And they look at you just to make sure.
They want you to look at the altimeter when you do your solo to make sure you don't geek because you'll geek out.
You'll just freak.
A lot of times people will not pull a cord.
They just won't do anything.
They just...
That's the best.
So as I'm going out, there's a guy who's grabbing me.
And he's looking at me and he's like...
You know, he does this.
I do this.
He's asking me, you know, how high are we?
And I'm giving him the thing.
Okay, you realize.
And he pushes me away.
This is the second time now.
That was crazy.
That was crazy.
I don't even want to think about that.
So I'm like this.
I'm thinking, where the hell am I?
I remember when we first took off, there was a little picture of the airport.
There's like airports all over the place.
I never realized this.
Which one's mine?
Where am I going?
They go, turn right, hard right.
Thank God for this walkie-talkie.
I had no idea where I was going.
I thought we were going to the airport.
No!
We're all here.
Does it matter?
I'm landing.
There's nothing you can do.
You're dropping.
Second one was...
I don't know about that.
I don't know about that.
Let me tell you the best one.
That was okay.
That was good.
I realized I know what people a little bit...
Adrenaline junkies, I kind of get it.
I kind of get it.
Even though that was sort of...
But let me tell you the best one.
This was even better.
It was called Top Gun USA.
And we flew a Marchetti single prop.
And we had two guys with us that would fly.
This is what the...
16, whatever the hell the pilots are.
They learn there's just maneuverability.
So he's over here and he says, you got a nickname yet?
I said, nope.
He said, well, we'll give you a nickname.
I said, okay.
He said, but you just can't pick it.
We have to give it to you.
We have to.
I said, okay, fine.
So we put on the suit and he's showing me this.
He has this stick with a plane on it and he's doing all this stuff.
I don't know what the hell he's talking about.
We're going to go up and down like this.
We're going to turn.
That's great.
What are you talking about?
I don't know what he's talking about.
We're going to go around.
We're going to turn.
Okay, thanks.
Thank you very much.
That was our briefing.
I said, but you're going to be here with me, right?
He goes, oh yeah, I'll be there.
I said, good.
So we get in it.
Everything's fine.
It's got a bubble top.
And you just slide this thing back.
He says, now.
He grabs down and gets a bunch of these bags.
Clear plastic bag.
He goes, here.
Stick them here.
He goes, this is when you throw up.
I said, I'm not going to throw up.
He says, oh, you're going to throw up.
You will.
But it's not, he said, it's not a retching kind of a, you know, abdominal cramping.
It's just whatever's in your stomach just comes up.
You don't even, it's nothing.
You won't get sick.
But just.
He says, and remember, when you get sick, I'm not going to get sick.
He said, when you get sick, just go like that.
And I'll say, fights off, and we stop.
Because we're fighting this other guy.
Okay?
Good.
So we take off.
We're in Kissimmee, near Orlando at the time.
And it's great.
He goes, now, a couple things.
We're going to pull some G's.
Okay, ready?
You ever pulled a G before?
Yeah, I never pulled a G. He goes, well, let me show you.
This is one G. I went, whoa!
Hey!
Hey!
Okay, good.
It's the coming up part.
Going down parts easy.
It was like, hmm.
It was now, I think we pulled the maximum.
Don't get me wrong.
Four, five.
I don't know.
Towards the end, it was tough.
But you pull a G for the first time and it may not seem like much to you.
And you're in no pressure suit.
You've never done this before.
You've never felt a G. It feels like a lot.
So the first time we did it, whoop!
I'm going like that.
Anyway, he fights off.
I deposit it in the bag.
He pulls back the bubble tap.
He goes, here you go, Chinese food.
I said, Chinese food?
He goes, that's an expression.
Okay.
So he closes it.
He goes, you ready?
He goes, okay, good.
Now, we're going to first be the aggressor.
Okay?
I said, now listen to what I'm saying.
He's ready?
Fight on.
Now we're going this way.
He says, now the other guy is coming this way.
He says, you see him?
Now I've got floaters.
I never realized this, but when you're looking in the sky and you've never looked like, you know, you've got sunglasses on, but you've never really looked at the sun.
I'm seeing worms and wiggles and I've got, it's like protozoa in my eyes.
What the hell is this?
You see him?
No!
I'm seeing a lot of Curlicues and Spirogyra, and all of a sudden, right by it.
He goes, hard left.
He's going this way.
We came down, and then up, behind him like that.
Down, and then right behind him.
And then I went, whoa!
That was my thing.
I'm like, I mean, I'm doing a Gene Cooper.
Anyway, fights off.
Toss it.
Let's keep going.
Let's do it again.
He says, you got that?
That's how you come up behind him.
I thought, that's interesting.
I said, what about coming down?
He goes, no.
Let him go this way.
You dive in and come up.
Okay, great.
Now, he's going to come after us.
This is evasive.
This is fun.
I said, okay, great.
Ready?
Fights on!
And again, I'm looking.
I'm seeing worms and wiggles.
And all of a sudden, right by us.
He says, what do I do?
He said, Keep going.
He's coming behind.
He's behind us.
Now go hard left.
I'm going like this.
Barrel rolls.
That wasn't too bad.
It's that coming up part.
But then we went down and it came up.
I went through more bags.
Guess what my nickname was?
Ziploc.
Here comes Frank.
Frank says, as a certified scuba diver, I went max 150 feet before getting Narcosis.
The Russian Kursk sub-disaster in 2000 got stuck in 300 feet below and all 118 personnel dead.
12,500 feet below?
I don't trust this story.
Thank you, Frank.
See, I need it.
1111, my favorite.
It's my favorite number.
1111, whenever I see 1111, I go crazy.
I love 1111.
Thank you for that.
Anyway, so we're doing this stuff, and it was about maybe an hour.
I was so exhausted.
He said, let us fly.
I said, yeah, please, you do it.
I mean, it was.
I was just beat.
I'm thinking, what am I tired from?
Just the up and the down and all this stuff.
These two guys were great.
One guy's name was Toast.
Maybe Mike and the other guy.
Toast.
We went out and had drinks after.
He was a great, wonderful guy.
Ex-Air Force retired.
They opened this thing up.
They're flying now.
Now we're doing this precision stuff.
And this guy's next to me, and they are, I mean, we can touch wings.
It's beautiful.
I mean, I've never seen anything like this.
I've never been in really a plane like this.
I mean, I've been in a single engine, but not aerobatic and all that.
He says, oh, I forgot to tell you, every time we shoot somebody, they have this canister, they push this button, it looks like there's smoke.
He says, we got some smoke left.
Why don't we smoke up that Wesley Miller?
Frank, for you too.
Can you believe this?
Hand forage, please.
This is how far they've fallen.
Thank you, Wesley.
Ooh, nice and good tackiness of it.
Well, anyway, he said, look, there's a lake.
Let's empty this.
Let's show them how we do it.
So we're treetop flying, like Stephen Stills would sing, right above.
I mean, it was beautiful.
And all of a sudden, he dips down, kind of tips it up, empties everything, fills this lake with, I don't know whether to smoke, whatever it was, and then takes off.
We found out later, we didn't realize, there was this guy fishing, and he's, you know, inside this little lake, and he's just, he has a little cane pole in his boat, and he probably looks over, and he thinks, now God forbid he's a veteran, he wouldn't be old enough, remember, like zeros coming out of them, like precision flyers, dipping down, filling the entire lake with smoke, and then up, and it was great.
Loved it.
Loved it.
Enjoyed it?
Look at this.
J.P. Morgan sank the Titanic to create the Federal Reserve to control the world.
You know, Marshmazz, I want to party with you.
I love that.
I love that.
You might think that's daft, but I love that way of thinking.
I think that is terrific.
I don't know if it's true.
We don't even know.
But the fact that you would say that, you're my kind of guy or gal or whatever.
Thank you for that.
That's the extent of my...
It was fun for a while, you know.
You know.
Thrill-seeking, sort of.
Kind of, maybe.
That's it.
Not interested anymore.
Not going to go skydiving.
One of the things that scares me, but the free fall, when you're doing it, you go into a spin or a tumble.
I saw this guy one time, because I thought, oh, you can start spinning like this.
You don't necessarily take on this perfect flying.
There was a guy one time, I think it was Navy SEALs or Delta Force or something, they were trying to get qualified, and this guy, who was at the top of his game, Physically fit, supreme warrior.
He went on.
He failed.
He was spinning.
He couldn't control.
I mean, that's when I said no.
No.
But let me tell you something.
If somebody ever tells you that you can sneak up with somebody on a...
You might hear that little air through the...
Vents through the cells, but you don't hear anything.
You can come right behind somebody.
You don't hear anything.
It is the greatest feeling.
Let me tell you something.
If you can do this before you die, do a tandem.
Just do that one time.
You will never...
It's like if I said, okay, I'm going to turn up your colors.
What do you mean?
Well, here's how you normally see it.
I'm going to do this one time now.
But I'm going to show you the way the colors really look.
He goes, oh my god!
Wow!
And you'll remember it.
You'll realize, this is...
Because right now, everything that I felt was natural.
My body did it.
Cortisol, adrenals, everything.
It was a symphony of fight or flight, limbic...
It was wonderful.
Just wonderful to be that scared.
Please do that.
Again, I'm sorry for these poor people who died in this.
Again, it's tragic.
I don't know how anybody would ever even want to do that.
I don't understand any of it.
If it makes any sense to you...
Anyway, that's it.
I don't want to talk about Durham.
I don't want to talk about Hunter Biden.
I don't want to talk about any of that stuff.
I kind of had it today.
And I want to tell you one thing.
Why do people walk around still with their mask below their nose?
I don't understand that.
I don't understand that.
I'm going to stop people and ask, you're driving me crazy.
Why?
Why are you doing that?
Anyway, thank you, my friends.
Hey, Frank, thank you.
Wesley Miller, thank you.
Scuba diver, I've never had any interest in that.
Isn't that something?
People tell me it's the most beautiful thing in the world, and it's great, and it's great.
I just don't.
I'm not a water person.
Don't ask me why.
Don't ask me why.
As you can tell, I'm very easily bored and unimaginative.
What I find interesting, most people don't.
All right, dear friends, you have a great night.
Thanks for being with us.
See you tomorrow morning, 8 a.m.
Until then, remember, the monkey's dead.
The show's over.
Sue ya.
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