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Aug. 23, 2019 - Louder with Crowder
01:03:07
#532 | NYT RACIST FAKE NEWS EXPOSED! | Bryan Callen Guests | Louder with Crowder
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Louder with Crowder Studios.
Protected exclusively by Walther.
And Hopper.
Now for a trip inside Trump World's... Hey Steven, heads up.
We're gonna need you in 15 for the TRP tape.
Okay, thanks Quarter Black.
Oh yeah, and I put some extra mushrooms on that Swiss there for you.
I know you like them so.
Oh thanks man, I appreciate it.
It made me wonder, at the end of a long week, was this a lie too?
But this, now, the Trump presidency, this is what a crisis of leadership looks and feels like.
Every week, another scandal.
Every week, another coup.
This week, it involves Rudy Giuliani.
You see him there on Anity. This week, I have for you some of the headlines. Some of the most incredible things right
now. Let me know if you have anything you'd like to say.
When I hit rock bottom, I go back to the top of the slide.
Where I stop and I take all my beats for a ride. Then I hit rock bottom and I see you again. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
Do you, don't you want me to screw you?
I'm making up crap that I can't tell you Tell me, tell me, tell me, come on, tell me the answer
Well, I may be alive, but I ain't no reporter Have this doctor
Have this doctor Have this doctor
Fabricating fake news Waiting for the axe to come
you Corporation subsured, fate was bloody lackeyed.
Man, I've been a naughty boy, I got my saucers rolled.
I am the Eggman.
I look like an Eggman.
I am a walrus!
Cuckoo, ca-choo!
Sitting in an English garden, waiting for a school.
you If the scoop don't come, I'll fabricate one and make it up and claim it's snooze.
I am an Eggman.
My head is an Eggman.
Who claims history?
I am who all rise C-c-c-c-choo, c-c-c-c-c-choo
I'm in here, you won't, you won't be, screw you I'm making up crap, but don't let me fool you
you Tell me, tell me, tell me!
Come on, tell me the answer!
You can be my lover, but I'm a chubby dancer!
Half the standard!
Half the standard!
Stephen!
Stephen!
Yeah?
You ready?
Uh... Yeah, I was just... And you were, um... No, yeah, I'm good.
Are you feeling alright?
Oh, oh my god!
Have the scare talk!
You ready? Yeah, I was just... and you were um... no, yeah, I'm good. Are you feeling alright? Oh my god!
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
Have the scarecrow!
Have the scarecrow!
You're a strange animal That's what I know
I know You're a strange animal
I come to follow I'm speedy
to scare you This is all I can do today because I had a back spasm in
the morning and I could barely move and or walk.
So I do this, but it looks like a more active dance with my chair.
I do this.
He's actually in a wheelchair.
Actually, Cordoblack Garrett sits in a wheelchair at his edit bay.
He chooses to sit in a wheelchair.
Why is that?
They made it for comfort.
It's long lasting sitting.
He's not wrong.
Quick escape.
I think that's a gross violation of the special needs labor laws.
We have Brian Callan on the show today.
We're going to be talking about the New York Times' new 1619 project, and Spike Lee, and the idea that the United States was built on slavery, racism, and genocide.
But first, there's this.
Donald Trump, don't trust China!
China is an a**hole!
God, true words.
Never spoken.
Did you like my flag there?
Can we show it one more time?
Just one more time.
Hit it again!
Donald Trump, don't trust China!
China is an a**hole!
That's what I've been saying!
You get me.
You understand me, Ming.
I want the unbelief version.
I really do.
So anyway, question of the day.
The left is obviously pivoting from Russian collusion now to Trump racism slavery because election cycle's heating up.
Here's a genuine question.
Do you think Donald Trump is a racist or do you think there's actually been a rise in racism under Trump?
I think he's a lot of things.
I think there are a lot of valid criticisms.
I don't think he's a racist.
I just don't buy it.
My half-Asian lawyer Bill Richman is with me.
How are you, sir?
Wonderful.
Glad to be here.
The guy who helped me light up Rashid Tlaib's Twitter, but not in a terrorist way, Quarterback Garrett, show him your hood pass.
What's up, dawgs?
And G. Morgan Jr., what's up?
How you doing, man?
You don't have a wine of the day?
I don't have a wine of the day, I know, it's weird.
Today's wine of the day is Percocet.
He's going in for surgery, so you won't be with us next week.
No, I know, I'm gonna be on my back.
As much of a hard time.
Stop it.
Yeah, I know.
We're not going to go right away.
We started off with the Chinese guy.
I don't think we need to go right to dirty jokes.
We'll let him take the brunt.
But I wish you the best.
I really do hope that you recover quickly.
I do too.
And that you, maybe afterwards, you won't be weak as a kitten.
Leading the news!
I'd like to be able to feel my right leg, that's all I want.
Alyssa Milano opened up about two abortions that she had in 1993, and that's two more in the same year than someone who had no abortions.
If you're doing the math.
The former actress, this comes to us from people, so you know it's reliable, the former actress stated she had not had the two abortions had she not, sorry, life would be completely lacking all its great joys, and she, quote, would never have been able To be free to be myself.
Wow.
I've never been free to be myself.
Wow.
By herself, she means angry whore.
By the way.
In her defense, she understood pregnancy to be impossible from a casting couch.
How do you get- Oh my god.
She said she was using birth control two pregnancies in a year.
What was your diaphragm a powdered donut?
The negative space of the donut.
Yes!
What is she talking about?
Charmed?
She never would have been able to film that show, Charmed.
It just shows a complete lack of... Not worth it.
Yeah.
What was it?
Gone Overboard with Ray Liotta?
Oh my gosh.
So many bad ones.
I mean, like, it shows a complete lack of compassion.
And has she never met someone with a child who's just like, I can't believe every day is a new adventure and I'm overjoyed.
Like, there's no joy possible.
Yeah.
Like, if she would have had the baby, and it was a baby, she would have melted and loved it.
I mean, look, there's a silver lining here, which is that there's no baby Alyssa Milano walking around, right?
I mean, you know... DON'T TRUST BABY ALYSSA MILANO!
BABY ALYSSA IS A S***HOLE!
Does she have kids?
Now?
I have no idea.
I hope not.
If she does, they're probably going to need some serious therapy.
Yeah.
Another tough... But mom, you said you would have never been fulfilled or been able to be yourself.
No, no, but I didn't mean about you.
Mommy's crazy!
I tell you, your mom is a**hole!
Another top story, by the way, it appears that President Trump, this was all over the news, he's growing increasingly frustrated with Fox News.
This comes from Politico after some critical coverage, unfavorable poll numbers from what used to be his preferred network.
The president said, there's something going on.
Fox has changed and I'm not happy with it.
So it's gotten worse over the week, with a source actually telling us that, I think an aide, with a source it's usually just an aide.
Yeah, an unnamed source.
An unnamed aide, but apparently an aide did tell President Trump that if you want something done right, and he took the advice, do it yourself.
Hi, President Trump, and welcome to the real no-spin zone.
Okay, frankly, I have not been very happy with this network.
They've said that it's no-spin, but there has honestly been so much spin.
It's crazy.
Okay, not here, though.
No spin.
No.
Now, if you want fake news, go watch that lying melty face, Chris Wallace, okay?
But here's just the real news, with no spit.
You hear me?
None.
Now, some people want to talk about the economy, but the lying fake news wants to claim we're in a recession.
They don't want you to talk about China and...
Knock it off.
Okay, frankly, there is to be zero spin on this show.
None.
And what you're doing, truthfully, okay, is not that.
No, as it relates to the economy of China and trade.
Cut it out, okay?
No.
Cut it out, okay?
This is a zone with not even some spitting.
Okay, none.
Now, I think we have Bret Baier standing by.
Where's Bret?
Oh.
I see what's going on here.
It's a spin mutiny.
Okay, real funny.
Frankly, so funny.
Frankly, I forgot to laugh.
Because I was never going to laugh anyway.
You like jokes?
Everyone here likes jokes?
Okay, here's one.
You're fired.
You.
It definitely you.
That was expected.
Uhh... this.
You do get sick spinning.
Half-Asian Bill seems unsettlingly... No, no, I mean job security, you know?
This is sad.
In other words, the inventor of the computer password actually has died at age 93.
For his request, his epitaph will include at least one number, one capital letter, and one special character.
Oh my gosh.
Is this the same guy who makes us change our password every 90 days?
I'm a little bit pissed off.
I can only come up with so many good ones.
They go in threes because another happened this week.
The inventor of the pocket calculator died as well.
Age of 60, sorry, 86.
Heart and kidney failure.
And Lotto with Crowder has obtained a picture of his headstone in question.
When it's upside down, there are so many possibilities.
It's a classic.
Namely ones that revolve around boobs.
That's pretty much the only possibility.
Switching gears now to the race for the White House, Elizabeth Warren addressed a Native American forum talking about her past transgressions, admitting that she had made some mistakes.
I know that I have made mistakes.
I am sorry for harm I have caused.
Can someone get this broad a smallpox blanket?
It is just... If you ever needed one... She's so whispery in that... She's like... That's how you know it's sincere.
Yeah.
For her, that's pillow talk.
Don't trust 1,064 Native Americans!
She a**hole!
Hey, the Native Americans, you know, bearing straight, they're Haitians.
They're our second cousins.
That's true.
That's true.
By the way, to prove her mettle, after the speech, Warren smoked a peace pipe, cleaned up at the craps table, and scalped Cory Booker.
So it seems like she's... That's a silver lining, really.
And she said Indian, like, five times in her speech.
Did she really?
Yeah.
I'm like, what?
I thought that was... Maybe those in the 1,164th Native American community can say Indian.
Oh, really?
It's like that?
I'm ready.
I'm ready for the counter protest.
Let's go.
Right, and by the way, she's the most viable Democratic candidate in the place?
Really?
She's about as viable as Alitha Milano's baby.
D.O.A.!
Asshole!
Well, at least you don't have to deal with Cory Booker anymore, I guess.
That's fine.
So, another news of the state of California is, and by the way, we're going to be talking about New York Times, slavery, genocide, Spike Lee, notorious anti-Semite, but we're going to California here.
This is the beauty of your imagination, is we can whisk you to faraway lands.
Like California.
Reportedly, they're planning to build a bridge over a major freeway so wildlife has room to roam.
This comes from HuffPo.
The plan is so big cats, deer, lizards, other creatures, including cougars, have a safe route to open space and better access to food and potential mates.
Officials in California are hoping this will fix both their endangered species problem, as well as their annoying cyclist pandemic.
So that seems like a way to dig yourself out of your financial hole, California.
You have people shitting That's how you solve it.
I love it.
That sounds like a meal right there.
It's brilliant.
By the way, so you remember watching the West Wing?
The West Wing actually did this as part of one of their episodes.
It was like the Wolves Only Highway from Pluie, right?
Or whatever it was.
They did it as parody and they're Dems and they were laughing at it.
Now this is California going, yeah, that actually sounds like a good idea.
We should do that.
By the way, have you been watching Billions?
So, in international news, a waiter in France was shot dead for being too slow.
Comes from The Guardian.
Witness said the gunman lost his temper as his sandwich wasn't prepared quickly enough and fled the scene.
This happened in France.
Any description of the assailant was completely omitted from the reporting, which made it difficult for the police sketch artist, but he gave it the old college try.
So it seems like that's a safe Mmm.
I could find that guy.
In the attacker's defense, the French attacker's defense, he had enough time to head over to the mosque, buy a gun,
get back to the restaurant, and the sandwich still wasn't ready.
To be fair, he had a leg up because he picked the gun up at the mosque.
So the old mosque show loophole strikes again.
Just like the tortoise.
Look, I'm sorry, but if you've been to France, that might be a justifiable homicide.
They're incredibly slow.
You mean just all of France?
Yes.
They're incredibly slow.
The service is like, you've got to just be crazy slow.
You went to France on your honeymoon?
Yes.
Slow!
Yeah, I don't know why.
Well, yeah.
The counterbalance, the honeymoon, which was too quick.
Have you been to France?
I have not been to France.
Nope.
That is not true.
Ask my wife.
Don't ask my wife.
Speaking of Europe, finally a town in Wales.
I'll ask Lyle later.
A town in Wales is installing $200,000 anti-sex toilets.
This comes from Barstool Sports because We just want to use them as a source to throw them a little bit of support these days.
The public toilets have weight sensors that can determine if more than one person has entered, and additional sensors are designed to pick up activity described as violent.
So if this plan fails to stop bathroom intercourse, plan B is to roll out the Brian Stelter sex scare pro.
I am not having sex in that stall.
Nothing will dry you up and make you limp like Ryan Stelter's scarecrow.
Oh, I could wonder why I have a primetime show.
So, describing silence.
Totally straight, by the way.
By the way, Mexican food can sometimes make me have a **** experience in a bathroom.
This is just disgusting.
I mean, come on, that's true of everybody.
This is a family show.
I don't need to think about this.
What does **** mean?
Hey, what's this thing next to my mug?
That's a cigar button.
I'm gonna hit it.
Billable hours, Bill.
Billable hours.
Billable hours, Bill.
Billable hours.
That's what we're doing.
This is me.
That's the slappy slap maneuver.
That's ancient Chinese technique right there, the Slappy Slap Maneuver.
He was the first, I was the first to have a dojo in Japan.
You stole it!
From someone who had it.
He married a woman whose father had a dojo and was retiring, and then he married Kelly LeBrock while he was married to this Japanese woman.
Oh wow.
Yeah, yeah.
That's thinking ahead.
Trivia, he said, I don't think That's true.
Yeah, it is, Steven.
I'd watch my tongue.
Bad things happen.
Really?
What are you going to do?
Run through my north wall like you did to the guy who was having cock fighting?
And then Steven Seagal and that episode?
Anyway, sorry, we've gotten off track.
Wow.
He's just a horrible person.
But I digress.
Trivia contest winner, by the way, before we get to the $69,000 is Regina C, I don't have her last name, who correctly identified that her former office used to be a massage parlor.
Congrats.
That is 100% true.
We found out because our neighboring businesses, they came in like, what are you guys doing?
And they saw the green screen.
Guarantee you they thought we were shooting hardcore pornography.
I was wondering what the smell was.
That was you.
That was General Tso's chicken.
All right, Spike Lee.
There was an interview.
I want to sort of set up this clip first.
There's a little bit of context that needs to be understood.
And I really want to know, do you genuinely think that Donald Trump could be a racist?
Do you think racism has been on the rise since Donald Trump?
I don't buy it.
I've talked about this, but it seems like now the rhetoric is heating up even more, where they're trying to paint him as a racist.
So the 1619 Project.
It's a project from the New York Times, and it's designed to write a series of pieces showing that everything, basically the basis of America, is the result of slavery, genocide, all of it.
Everything bad.
And they've got a number of high-profile celebrities, from Spike Lee to Oprah, trying to promote it.
Now, some leaked internal discussions actually show the decision was made to shift the narrative away from the failed Russia story.
So now they're going, Russia didn't work, let's pivot back to racist.
After Mueller failed to find any collusion, the editor-in-chief, New York Times, supposedly at a loss how to cover Trump, so he decided, all right, let's just paint all of America's history as racist and say it's more racist now than ever.
It's more racist now than slavery because Trump.
Couldn't possibly be honest.
Right.
I don't know.
So it's not really about slavery.
I want to be clear about this.
That's how they're trying to sort of frame this.
They just need something to make President Trump look bad, by their own admission.
Right.
And they're asking this question, like, why are we even asking anymore if he's a white supremacist?
They're just saying it.
They're not trying to paint him as a racist.
They're saying he is.
That's what they're doing.
What do you think, Half-Asian Bill?
Do you feel like you've been marginalized more?
My white part has been more marginalized, yes, that's for sure.
Look, there's no question that slavery is a part of our history as a country.
Whether it defines the nation, and to say that is to say that every person who was a part of it... Oh, did you fight as part of the Union Army?
You must have also been part of slavery as well.
Right?
I mean, there's no nuance to it, other than just to say, hey, I don't want you to forget, every one of you is a piece of s**t. I mean, that's essentially, that's this tagline of 1619, right?
Everything you enjoy should taste like a**hole!
Judge Washington, don't trust a**hole!
You can use that argument for everything, right?
There's a sore spot, you still can't ride the Amtrak.
Yeah, but it makes the assumption that the United States would not have been a great country without slavery.
So we had all the natural resources, we had great navigable rivers, which turns out to be very important, and we had a great system of government that was growing while... Actually, Matt, we could do a whole segment on this if people go back through the archives, where actually the South was hindered by slavery.
If you look at the economic developments that happened in the North, it didn't happen in the South, and that's because slave labor doesn't tend to put in... they're not burning the candle at both ends, and they're not necessarily doing an honest job.
And I'm not saying that This is important to you.
It's very important to me.
Because so much, we're not taught this in school.
should have sabotaged and a lot of them did but if you look at the developments
they were hampered by slavery. All right so this is just I just want to make sure
that we set this up so you understand why Spike Lee is making the rounds and
is it on Anderson Cooper's 360 to plug this 1619 project you'll be hearing a
lot about it let's start this off. This is important it's very important to me
because so much we're not taught this in school right you know we're still dealing
Christopher Columbus and all that other stuff.
What?
Yes we are.
Everyone is taught about slavery in school.
I'm sorry, wait, is Christopher Columbus not real?
It's not a real thing.
He didn't land on Plymouth Rock!
Wait, so there was American slavery in 1492, that's what was happening?
How history works, it's how you teach it.
One thing, and then the next thing, and then the next thing.
I think the Indians were enslaving other Indians.
It's almost as though it's linear.
Wow, I must... Spike Lee, tell me more.
Is it my meds, or does that sound... Well, the good thing is he's going to be telling you a whole lot more.
Question number two today, who did not learn about slavery in school?
I think a lot of people aren't taught that we are uniquely responsible for ending slavery in a lot of ways in the modern world, but let's go to the next clip.
This country, United States of America, was built upon the genocide of Native people and slavery.
I mean, that's a fact.
Well, you can say that.
You can say that!
That's a fact!
That's going to be a no from me.
That's a fact.
And by the way, no one wants to minimize here the atrocities that were committed against Native Americans back then.
We called them Indians, and as Elizabeth Warren says, Redskins.
But she's 1,164th, so it's okay.
She can say that.
Native Americans, one thing people don't understand, They were mostly wiped, we've talked about this so many times, I'm sorry I have to repeat it, they were wiped out through diseases that the settlers brought, inadvertently, because these people had not developed an immunity to them.
Out of the, I think, 250,000 natives, Columbus' first stop, right, in one of the Americas, Hispaniola, I should do the, uh, Brian Calano, teach me how to pronounce that later.
New diseases wiped out over 230,000 of the indigenous people by 1517.
That's nearly 95% of their population.
A big part of that, by the way, they hadn't domesticated the horse.
Right?
This idea, if you're coming into contact with a domesticated horse for the first time, this whole idea of bow and arrow, horseback culture, it's a lie.
They hadn't domesticated the horse and they didn't use the wheel.
Yeah.
And by the way, when we come and like accidentally killed 95% of you just by shaking your hand, it's our bad.
Sorry.
We didn't even know what germs were.
My bad.
I mean part of it is like this is the part where again we've talked about this before where there's there's just a lack of nuance when you go to the 1619 project and all you want to focus on is one part of history that involves slavery to use that to push a political agenda today right yeah then then you've ignored the fact that sure was slavery part of our history did slavery You know, set certain things in motion in this country and some would argue it still has some reverberating effects to this point.
I think we just disagree on how much effect it still has today and what needs to be dealt with it.
Same with the Native American population.
I mean, there's unquestionably atrocities occurred, but to say it's only atrocities is to ignore the rest of the history.
What I have a problem with is the term genocide.
This is a problem.
Elizabeth Warren is a perfect example.
More people with a percentage of Native American than ever.
And that's because most of it was due to interbreeding.
We didn't want to kill all of them.
No.
We wanted to marry them.
We wanted to have population.
But let's look through the most bloody battles.
These certainly did happen.
Wounded knee you probably know about because you learned about it in school.
It's not taught.
150 to 350 Native Americans killed or wounded.
There were also 25 American soldiers killed, 39 wounded.
Listen, it's a little different from a genocide.
If you're talking about the Holocaust, like, well, you know what?
The Jews got their licks in too.
That's not what a genocide is.
Like, well, you know, they took out six million, but I tell you what, those Jews, they pulled off a couple of million.
You know, there was a give and take.
No, that's what genocide is.
It's a complete extermination.
By the way, sometimes massacres went the other way.
1622, is it pronounced?
I don't know.
Indians.
They had no casualties in this battle.
They slaughtered 347 English settlers.
Again, that's not the way genocide usually goes.
And don't forget, this is something people don't remember.
We don't teach this in history.
Native American tribes were warring with each other before we got here.
Lots and lots.
They were incredibly violent.
To go south, how do you think Cortes defeated 500 conquistadors?
No!
He enlisted the help of other native tribes.
We tossed them some fire water and said, listen, These guys have been enslaving you to collect their gold for centuries.
How about you try the guys with the metal hats?
Well, and when we show up and we have kind of peaceful relationships with some tribes and then we start to move, you guys were already warring.
What you're really doing is basically saying we're really pissed off that when you came in, you were better at war than we were.
Yeah.
We were already trying to take each other's land and I was succeeding and now you kicked my butt and I'm really pissed about that.
Here's what I will have to say is that if you jump in and you ask the question of, did we have a right to come in and take this land?
I don't necessarily know that there's any particular more or less right between The people who are already here, is it a first mover's right?
I mean, that's the part where the narrative falls apart when you hear people say, well, these were the indigenous people.
Oh, okay, so we don't care about the indigenous species that were here before those indigenous people came here.
Are they important?
Oh, well, yeah, sure, they are more important.
And then you're just saying, okay, great, well, so we should just get rid of all people.
Every single person should leave this country.
It just falls apart if you follow that logic.
Is it something people don't understand?
Contact will be made at some point.
So let's say we never did back then.
Today, a chopper or a plane goes overhead.
Guess what?
Now it's been made.
There's going to have to be a clash of civilizations.
When there's a more advanced civilization, they meet, either they adapt, either they become a part of this news, or They get wiped out.
That's what has happened always.
We're in a unique time in history in that we don't go take over countries that are inferior, like Canada.
We don't do that because we've advanced beyond it.
But this is the way it worked throughout the globe for all time.
Yeah, atrocities, but the idea that America is uniquely responsible for it, that's the problem I have.
But again, this is all a thin veil to get to the real reason, which is the 1619 Project.
Is Donald Trump a white supremacist?
Why are we still asking, is this guy a white supremacist?
I mean, like... To you, that is a... It's not even a question anymore.
Oh!
Oh, he's just said okay.
I mean, the Muslim man... I thought the clip froze.
...all Mexicans are rapists, murderers, drug dealers.
I mean, it's... That guy... Did he go... Before going to Anderson Cooper, was he talking to his wife?
Spike Lee froze.
He's like, no, listen, I need my heroin and Daymanda glasses.
Why are we even asking if he's a white supremacist?
Because most people aren't.
Cooper I could fit you in my back pocket what are those glasses?
Why are we even asking if he's a white supremacist?
Because most people aren't.
Only you are.
And you're answering your own question by the way.
And then he talks about, how can you have so many inaccuracies in one sentence?
It's tough.
The Muslim ban, all Mexicans are racist.
OK, let's just go through this.
And then he goes on to talk about the good people on both sides.
Listen, there was no Muslim ban.
There was never a Muslim ban.
All Muslims were never banned from the United States.
What you're talking about is an immigration ban on seven countries that were identified as countries of concern from Barack Obama, and they were put on a temporary ban.
By the way, Trump enforced it for 90 days.
Obama enforced it for six months with Iraq.
There's no Muslim ban.
There's never been a Muslim ban.
Stop it.
Okay?
And this is what bothers me.
I mean, you know this as a lawyer.
They teach this to politicians, too.
Like, obviously he's being disingenuous a little bit here, but he could have at least just sort of curbed his language by just saying, you know, he said that Mexicans are rapists.
Instead, he said, saying all Mexicans are rapists.
You're just making it too easy, sweetheart.
I know.
All Mexicans are rapists.
Really?
Did he say that?
That's the first thing to tell a politician is don't use words like all, absolutely, completely, totally.
And that's why when we do it on this show, we do it by design.
If we're 100% certain, like making sure that half-Asian Bill Richman gets me unblocked from Rashida Tlaib's personal account.
All Mexicans are rapists.
Donald Trump was talking about MS-13.
People who rape and kill women and children, that's what they do!
It's crazy.
That's their calling card.
They're the killing women and children bandits.
By the way, did you see Anderson Cooper push back on that?
Did we not?
Oh, he didn't have that.
Yeah, no, we have it next.
So this is the next one.
Now he goes on to the one that they paired a lot, that Donald Trump, his justification, along with all Mexicans are rapists and the Muslim ban, is that he praised neo-Nazis, to hear Spike Lee tell it.
He can't make a decision between What's white and wrong?
What's love and hate?
There's both people.
I mean, that's kind of behind this.
I mean, that quote, that's going to be attached to him.
He's going to be on the wrong side of history.
And that's the first thing they're going to say, that quote.
It's interesting because there's a lot, there's now a movement among some Republicans to kind of rewrite the history of what the president said.
What?
Rewrite history?
Yes, we are attempting to rewrite history by simply showing a clip of Donald Trump condemning neo-Nazis in his own words.
And you had people, and I'm not talking about the neo-Nazis and the white nationalists, because they should be condemned totally, but you had many people in that group other than neo-Nazis and white nationalists.
You said it twice.
Wow, it's like all those times when I hear on CNN that Donald Trump has never called out neo-Nazis or white supremacists.
It's like this video doesn't exist!
Look at the amazing made-up videos that people are able to create in the Korean industry.
He condemned neo-Nazis the same amount of times in one phrase as Spike Lee was wrong.
Well, but here's the thing.
So Anderson Cooper didn't push back on the Mexicans' comment.
He's a journalist, I thought.
I thought he was trying to get to the truth.
Didn't push back on that.
And then carried his water on this comment and said, yeah, they're trying to rewrite history.
Right, Spike?
Right?
I'm cool, right?
I like your glasses.
I don't think he said that, but I'm sure he did.
He probably tried to lift him.
He winked.
I saw him wink.
There was a wink.
There was a wink.
That pisses me off!
He's a journalist!
It was a wink between guys with glasses.
G. Morgan Jr.
was there too.
Is this a genre of wink?
Son of a gun!
I don't know.
I don't know. I don't understand what's going on.
All right.
So, by the way, oh, I forgot.
Hit the notification bell if you're subscribed because subscriptions don't mean a whole lot.
Subscribe on iTunes, leave us a rating, and most importantly, do join Mug Club.
Not only do you get the full daily show, like hours and hours of content that we can never air on YouTube, but my half-Asian lawyer, Bill Richman, is very expensive.
So when we're doing our legal stuff with big tech or even representatives like Rashida Tlaib, just understand MugClub supports that, especially since we've been demonetized.
And it's a show.
You'll get to see it too.
You know what, just one thing to that point is people only really see like the tip of the iceberg of all the things that we have to fight with on the back end of things.
It's a constant, it's a constant battle.
So Mug Club is what allows us to continue.
I mean, how many tens of thousands just in basic paperwork last year of people making false claims?
I mean, there were, well, between people stealing content, between people accusing us of stealing content, just this week there was 14.
Yeah.
Wow.
You know, just having to deal with that.
I mean, it's, it's... Glad we're keeping you busy, buddy.
A big part of before the show, if Bill Richman, half-Asian Bill Tries to come to my office and say, no, no, it's only gonna make me mad.
Today, you're being sued by an angry tranny who thinks that you're guilty of hate speech and claims the socialism shirt is actually her face.
I know it's not true, but it might just be worth it to pay this crazy person to go away.
I'm like, ah, right.
Mug clubbers made it happen.
All right, let's go out to the thank you mug club.
Otherwise we would just be, we would be crossing the finish line.
Like in the movie, was it Small Soldiers?
With the gorgles or whatever it was.
And the guys trying to walk and they're all jumping on.
That would be us just with just hundreds of angry trannies and Vox employees trying to do this show if it were not for Happy and Bill Richmond looking over our shoulder.
Next clip talking, now we go directly to the KKK with Damon and Spike Lee.
They're not even hiding is You know, at least the KKK people are too cowards to actually show their face.
Because the guy in the White House gave him the dog whistles, like, come on out!
So, our guys in the White House, so we're good!
I don't think that's how a dog whistle works.
It's more like, come on out!
It's a silent whistle.
Only dogs can hear it.
I know, he thinks they're handing the whistles.
Here, let's... Silly.
Sometimes I like to have a laugh.
President Trump is telling the KKK to go for it, as you say.
Any examples?
Any examples of dog whistles?
You know what?
Any pictures of Donald Trump even with an actual whistle?
I'll take that!
I think what we should know is remember from that clip with Trump where he was condemning the neo-nazis and the white nationalists and then it wasn't just enough to do it once but he did it again and so after doing it twice I definitely got the read between the lines is I love neo-nazis and white nationalists.
That was what I mean that's what I got.
Hey hey I had my fingers crossed.
Anderson 360, more like 160.
What?
Epic.
It's going over your head.
That seems like a kind of insult.
Actually, it's almost turning all the way around.
All of these examples can be easily debunked with a quick Google search or a clip just as quickly as the 77 cents on the dollar pay gap myth.
So if it's so obvious, why is this even a question anymore?
Well, because you've brought no evidence.
How about you show me a clip?
Like, even just one picture.
One picture.
Anyone, one picture of Donald Trump with a loud whistle.
I'll allow that.
And apologize.
All right.
We have another clip, I think, to get to more... It's in the dossier.
The whistle.
What do you hope people are kind of reflecting on in terms of the impact of, you know, enslaved people... Yeah, the 1619 Project.
It's about 1619.
A lot of these people getting behind this guy, digging me in the wrong side of history with him.
Oh, so the project is not so much about American history as it is... Don't vote for Donald Trump, my possums!
What happened to the 16... He's there to plug the 1619 project, right?
That's why he's there.
This is supposed to be a project that teaches people, educates... Because we wasn't taught it in school, right?
So why aren't you teaching us now?
And instead it's, don't vote for Trump?
Can you imagine any other scenario where someone is there to specifically plug a particular project?
Like, well, tell us about your...
New film, Pineapple Express 2.
I have ass warts, yeah.
What does that have to do?
That has nothing to do with the topic at hand here.
No, but you know what I do appreciate about it, though?
Is it's honest.
Because they could have continued to say, no, no, no, this is just an educational project.
Here we are educating.
And it would have been a little bit more, you know, circumstantial to be able to say, oh, you know, this is actually an attack on uh... trying to change voting minds away from the president because the upcoming election and coincidentally just at the timing of everything we couldn't have done it any other time between now and sixteen nineteen but this was the year we were going to do it at this very moment in history but that is the part that i appreciate is that uh... the glasses lay low for four centuries and then bring out the guy who did do the right thing!
I mean, that's the part where you go, hey, yeah, thank you, I appreciate you letting us know that this is just a thinly veiled political move.
Everything that we believe the left to be, that they kind of veiled for a long time, you know, kind of like, okay, you know what, a little bit of sleight of hand, now they're just doing out in the open.
Yeah.
And I think there is a silver lining there, because now people, like for the longest time, really up until Donald Trump, people thought CNN was legitimate news.
Yeah.
And I had been shouting this from the rooftop like the Ricola guys, where I was saying, like, no, listen, it's not a misunderstanding.
Your problem is CNN, because they present it as though it's actually unbiased.
And now we know through these interactions with people like Spike Lee and Anderson Cooper.
And you had a good point before the show.
Yeah, exactly.
So by these standards, we'd actually have to say that President Barack Obama was also a racist, right?
Against white people, right?
OK, so just hear me out for a second.
I don't know if I want to.
You got to give me just a second.
Don't hear him out!
Is there a legal liability here?
Just follow me, right?
So if I had a son, he would look like Trayvon Martin, right?
And then we had hands up, don't shoot.
And we had, all right, we're going to send A.G.
down there to take a look at this.
We're going to go through all this stuff.
And so Black Lives Matter comes out of this movement, right?
And so you have this huge, this massive overreach of Black Lives Matter, trying to make people think that every white person in America doesn't think that your life matters, especially police officers, even though it was black police officers involved in some of these incidents, right?
And so there's this massive overreach.
What happens typically when there's a massive overreach by one side in one of these things, right?
So you have people on this side.
There's a big push by people on the other side.
I think, I would make the argument that Donald Trump is not what has brought white supremacists kind of out into the open.
It's a huge overreach by Black Lives Matter that has allowed that.
I'm not saying it's the sole cause.
I'm saying it has allowed that to happen because all of a sudden, all these guys who are kind of hiding in the shadows are like, what the hell's going on over here?
These guys are out overreaching and now public sentiment is against that.
And by the way, Barack Obama certainly did not condemn Black Lives Matter as emphatically as Donald Trump has condemned neo-Nazis, white supremacists.
Exactly, he never did that.
So by these same standards, Barack Obama, by the way, you know, newsflash, it's possible to be racist and be black.
Yeah.
Okay?
I'm not saying he was.
I'm saying that if we use these same standards, we have to look at him in the same lens you're looking at Trump, he would be looked at as potentially being a racist person against black people.
Well, the idea, though, is that you cannot—maybe black people can be discriminatory, but they can't be racist because they're not in a position of the systemic powers that be, like the presidential office.
Yeah.
Yeah.
One real quick point is I don't want this to be a message where because Spike Lee and some of the folks who are at the top of the 1619 project That there's a denial of slavery and its impact on those people, or even people in the generations afterwards.
And this is the important part, is that if you're out there trying to think about how to intelligently talk to someone, either who's confused about what it is, or someone on the other side that's trying to say, oh, you know, this is what the project is, don't bury your head.
Go look at the project.
Just take it with a grain of salt.
Just recognize when there's facts and history versus political message.
If you want to talk about What today is and how different it is and how we've come as a country and what we are today versus in 1619?
You gotta know the facts.
So go look at the facts.
The problem, unfortunately, is obviously the incredible bias.
Like, Spike Lee, he's sort of the spearhead, or at least seen that way, of the modern black rights movement.
Where the hell that is?
You know what?
Can someone answer this?
What rights are they fighting for now?
I'm not talking about discrimination.
I'm talking about individual races.
What rights are they fighting for now when they talk about black rights movement, when they talk about white privilege?
I don't know.
Genuine.
This could just be me being tone deaf.
It could be a blind spot.
I don't know.
I have a car that does have some blind spots.
Yeah.
Korean.
So... No, it's a Korean car.
A whole lot of blind spots.
Oh, I thought you had a Korean one.
No, I wouldn't do that in front of my half-Asian lawyer.
But let's look at... He's Chinese.
Half-Chinese.
Can you tell the difference, like, if you see someone and you say, he's Korean, instead of Chinese?
Anyway.
I can't with white people.
Spike Lee.
Black Klansman.
Malcolm X. Do the right thing.
Yeah.
There's a reason he's on the show.
There's a reason he's been chosen as a spokesperson for 1619.
It's because he's seen as a figurehead.
He's clearly presented as an authoritative figure on this topic.
And he's either demonstrably, completely misinformed, or he's deliberately misinforming everybody else.
There are only two options.
All Mexicans are rapists.
The Muslim ban.
He said there were fine people on both sides.
He supported white supremacists.
Either Spike Lee, you're too stupid to be representative of this movement and this project, or you are lying in order to leverage this to don't vote for Donald Trump.
There is no third option.
And I think a part of these people being misinformed is, it's idiot bubbles.
Like Spike Lee goes out and says, oh, he said all Mexicans are rapists.
He said that he likes white supremacists.
He said he didn't like my glasses.
Tom Hanks said World War II, I remember at one point, was based on racism and fear mongering.
They're surrounded by people in this entertainment industry, and by the way, that includes the media, where no one just says, Huh?
Exactly.
What?
There's no checks and balances.
Spike Lee wouldn't go out and spout this if Anderson Cooper, before he went on it, like, anytime we talk about this before the show, we go through a show map and one of us has a point that we're not quite sure, we go, ooh, I don't think that's the strongest point.
Anderson Cooper could have at least done Spike Lee a favor and went, you know, like, I'm gonna talk about how he said all Mexicans are rapists.
Anderson Cooper could have said, oh, wait, wait, wait, he didn't say all.
Remove the word all, but instead he's like, yes, absolutely!
No jump in, no real quick, hey, you know, we should stick to facts here.
Right.
By the way, Warby Parker?
I don't know.
Spike Lee and the people at the New York Times, let me simplify this for you.
They are either misinformed or they are misinforming.
Period.
Neither option is a good look for a legitimate news outlet.
That's why Americans don't trust legacy media.
All right, Brian Callan coming up.
After this, thank you, Dean Morgan Jr. and have a nice night at Bill Lynchman!
🎵 🎵Jill Kahn, all powerful, Jill Kahn's son🎵
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I'm dicey, dicey, zoo, zoo, pop, pop, new.
Zoo, zoo, dicey, dicey, zoo, zoo, zoo, pop, pop, new.
Hey, Quarter Black, because you're ethnic, what constitutes the popping and the locking?
At which point?
You pop it out, right?
So you start from a position, you pop it out, and then you lock it into another position.
So either way, it should just be lock and lock.
You've got to pop out of the lock.
So you go from one lock.
I'm just a man, my friend.
I'm just a man.
another lock.
This sounds like a very white description.
This is the other three quarters of you.
I'm just trying to be clear.
Our next guest, very happy to have him in.
He sees he's popping it and he's locking it.
I don't know, maybe he can answer this for us.
One of my favorites, I think he's one of the funniest guys out there, his new special
Complicated Apes is streaming on Amazon.
You know him as Coach Meller, of course, on the Goldbergs, and now the very popular show
Schooled.
You can follow him on the Twitter at Brian Callen.
Mr. Callen, how are you, sir?
I'm just a man, my friend.
I'm just a man.
Thank you for having me on.
I'd rather.
Do you know what the popping and locking is?
Well, I'm obsessed with the less twins.
They are, they are...
They do these dances, I don't even know what to say about it.
I'll never be truly happy because I'm not a popper or a locker, nor am I a Spanish dancer.
I want to speak the language of salsa and merengue and samba fluently, but I don't.
I don't live in Barcelona.
I want to eat paella and drink wine in the middle of the afternoon, take a siesta and then dance the night away.
And I also want to grow a goatee.
I grew a goatee.
My dad, Marine, Midwestern, American guy.
I had a goatee.
I had a little mustache and a little patch here.
I went to Italy.
Oh, yeah.
There's no need to... I don't know why you're saying mustache.
They're like, I gotta get merengue de samba.
But now you're just throwing an affectation for no reason.
But go ahead.
My other languages seep in.
I'm sorry.
I studied in Europe.
But the point is... He's a cultured man.
I'm a cultured man.
And I go to my dad and my dad goes, How long are you going to keep that stuff on your face?
And I immediately got embarrassed.
And I went, well, no, I mean, my friends tell me it looks good.
My father just whispered.
He goes, it's not you.
And I ran to the bathroom and shaved that scratch off my face because it was subversive.
It is.
When it doesn't work, it really, really doesn't work.
Hey, what is your ethnicity there?
You know, I'm Italian.
My mother, Is 100% Sicilian, and my father's Irish-German, you know, just a big Midwestern kid who grew up on the farm.
Okay, so 100% Sicilian, your mom said, so you probably have more black in you than Elizabeth Warren has Native American.
There's probably a good amount.
Well, yes, I have a lot of fast-twitch muscle, that's all I'm gonna say.
Don't kid yourself.
I got some hand speed, I got some foot speed.
I know what that means.
That won't make air.
I got a high tight rope and I insert some caps.
That will not make air.
Just because I want you to still have a career after this and everyone's on guard after the Carlos Maza Vox.
What's going to be said?
Hey, so we were talking about this before the break.
Different things we wanted to get into.
Obviously your friend Joe Rogan just had Dan Crenshaw on.
He's been on the show quite a bit.
But before that, you know, I know you've talked with a lot of people on air, sort of conspiracy theorists, and you've been somewhat the voice of reason.
I'm not, I don't want to say somewhat, you've been the voice of reason.
I don't know why I was giving myself an out there to give you some kind of a day man and a backhanded insult.
I have no idea why.
You were reasonable.
But I'm not a conspiratorial guy.
I do think the Clintons have had people whacked.
Your thoughts?
Do you really?
Yes.
My thing is, my only The problem with conspiracies is you're giving people way more credit for being that organized, that gutsy, and for being able to keep their mouth shut.
I mean, in Washington, trying to keep a secret is impossible because everybody's got their own agenda.
And it's just like putting a bunch of people in a room.
Nobody agrees with each other.
Everybody is more ambitious than the next person.
And if you can kind of expose, but Johnson was so angry at not being able to keep a secret, You know, some of the Johnson tapes, he's like, I'm gonna put a one eyed, I'm gonna put a blind or a one eyed farmer in charge of my defense, the Secretary of Defense, because I can't keep a secret.
And I'm calling the editor of the Chicago Sun and begging him not to run an article because I've been, we had this whole cabinet meeting, and you guys are leaking information.
So in terms of a conspiracy Gun to your head.
Gun to your head.
Your life depends on it, right?
Your family.
They're going to be saying, oh, we're so glad you're with us.
Or, oh, he was too young.
You know, he went too young.
So this is, I want to present the finality.
Bang, bang, you're not coming back, Brian Cowan.
I can disarm you very quickly, but keep going.
Yes.
You know what?
I'll romance you.
You've got a gun to my head.
Let's say I'm a regular civilian, but keep going.
That's fair.
Do you think they've played a role in someone maybe disappearing inconveniently?
I think if it was politically expedient for Bill Clinton or Hillary Clinton, I do think that they have a rather fluid moral compass, if you will.
Right.
I suppose they'd be, I mean, look, the guy's not cooperating.
I mean, what happened?
What?
He had a heart attack?
But now you've got to tell me.
Why does Bill Clinton sound like Miss Maisel?
What is this?
What?
And they cover their mouth.
Whenever you kill someone and you know you did it, but you have to feign surprise, you go, what?
Right.
Steven was so young.
Yeah.
And the other dead giveaway is a candelabra.
I've played Clue.
Yes, indeed.
But I think I had people waxed.
Who did it?
Who did it?
How'd they pay them?
And why?
It'd be difficult.
It'd be difficult to get people to sustain that loyalty, take that kind of a risk.
I think in Washington, but when we're talking about a lot of it, you know, we're talking about local politics in Arkansas before Washington, and sometimes it's not necessarily directly involved.
But listen, I just, I ask because, okay, so I'm not crazy.
I'm not a conspiracy guy.
That's the one thing where I look at the evidence, I go, I'm not saying, listen, that Bill Clinton made a phone call to Redbird Flies Tonight and Epstein all of a sudden breaks his neck on a paper bed sheet.
That's not what I'm saying.
But the totality of evidence makes me... Well, here's a conspiracy theory.
I think in today's world it's much easier to destroy someone's reputation.
You don't need to go through the process of killing somebody.
What you want to do is figure out a way to destroy their reputation.
Dig up old tweets, dig up things they've said, start a rumor, and you can very easily erase them from the competition. That's all you need to do. So it used
to be in a Machiavellian sort of sense, you figure out a way to get your hit squad to take that guy
out. Don't need to do that so much. A little too messy. Nowadays, it's all about, you know,
reputation, you know, just erasing someone's reputation, just destroying somebody. That's true. And that
means the Epstein thing, I have a theory on the Epstein. You want to hear a conspiracy theory on the
Epstein thing? Sure. I'm not entirely sure. We had Alex Jones on the show, you know, for
Mug Club members who talked about the Alex Epstein, so I'm a little bit shell-shocked, but
yes.
I got you.
No, no, the only thing I would say is it would make sense if you said he was a Mossad agent.
And that he had this island in this plane and the idea was to get very powerful men in compromising situations where they were having sex with young women.
Now you got videotape and you can get some leverage.
So a foreign government would find interest in getting people, whoever they might be, different dignitaries and things and getting political leverage.
I guess that's something I could I could maybe get on board with.
As far as like breaking his neck, no.
He hung himself because he had nowhere else to go.
Right, yeah, maybe.
I think you're right.
I think that goes to kind of what you're speaking about as far as reputation, right, in that case.
It's not so much about the sexual relationship with minors, it's about the reputation destruction that would ensue after that.
And that's a good example right there.
We know there was a pedophile island.
We know there was an island where people were going, where there was sex with underage people.
This man was charged with these crimes.
We know that's the case.
We know a lot of powerful people went there.
It just comes down to what were they doing there and what was going to be done with this information afterward.
That's not a conspiracy.
But everyone is filling in the gaps with, okay, now... And by the way, there's nothing to fill in the gaps with that isn't fishy.
I mean, it's basic.
You're filling in the gaps with Starkist at that point.
Yes, but now again, by the way, the one thing I know of being around fairly, you know, as you get older, your friends, people get successful, you meet successful people with a lot of money.
You don't get less of a degenerate.
When you get a billion dollars in the bank, it's not like now I'm going to not be a degenerate.
What you can do is ramp it up and control your environment.
So if you want to get powerful men to just do business with you or whatever, what do you do?
You just parade a bunch of beautiful women in the room That's what happens.
That's how men operate.
So, you know, I mean, it might just be that.
It might be the guy likes young girls because he's a perv or whatever.
And so do a lot of others.
Wait, what's the or whatever?
Why are you giving yourself a backdoor there?
He's a perv or whatever.
Bro, if you're 17, 18, depending, some of that stuff could be legal.
I think actually in Vegas, 17 is legal.
I don't know.
No, you know exactly.
You know exactly.
That's what's so unsettling about this.
In Quebec, where I'm from, it's 14.
And the Liberal Party, I think the Liberals and the NDP, and by the way, I don't mean like Liberals, man, the Liberal Party in Canada.
In Quebec, we don't really have a conservative voice at all.
We have Liberals and then Liberal Separatists and there's NDP.
And several of those platforms, they wanted to do away with the age of consent at all.
And it's 14 in Quebec.
What?
They want to get rid of the age of consent totally?
Yeah, there were quite a few people.
It was mainstream, yeah.
And I understand some arguments on that side in the sense that, like, I've known people who've gone to... I shouldn't say, no, but I've had people... known people who've known people who've gone to jail because they're 19 and their girlfriend was 17, and then they break up.
Like, that's a whole different thing.
Someone to be tarred and feathered as a sex offender for life, tossed in the same place.
Yeah, that's a hard case.
Yeah, as Epstein.
All right.
We don't have a... You know what?
Here.
Here's what I want to do, because I said I was going to throw you a curveball.
Now this whole thing has been about conspiracies.
What we're going to do is go to a web extended for people who have not joined up at Mug Club, and we're going to get into a little bit more about firearms and Dan Gable and wrestling.
That is Brian Callen, at Brian Callen.
And for people watching on YouTube right now, go on over to the Mug Club.
Woo.
Uh.
You must choose.
It's cold outside.
Bimbo, bimbo.
My name is Mr. Susan.
You must choose.
And now it is time for you to do the choosing.
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Brian Stelter, there it is.
Oh my god.
I see you, enemy.
I see you, enemy!
Enemy!
Enemy!
You are my enemy!
You will pay.
Yeah, you think I don't see your face, scum?
You don't think I don't see you, stelter?
Yeah, stelter.
You will fall!
You will not bring humanity down!
God is going to destroy you!
you next time.
Bye for now.
It's called the Disloyal Synchronized Swimmer.
Oh, man.
Not a team player, that synchronized swimmer.
Yeah, you just left me.
How did that make the Olympics?
Yeah, that seems really superfluous.
Whenever I hear that they want to remove wrestling from the Olympics, and I go, what?
But you have synchronized swimming and dressage.
That's horse dancing.
You're not even the one doing the sport.
They still have the one with the gymnastics, with the little... Yeah, with the little ribbons.
Tassels and stuff?
Not tassels, they're ribbons.
Oh, tassels are like on... What?
Like on a jacket.
You're thinking of a strip club!
No.
I am.
You're thinking of Evel Knievel or Liberace.
What are you talking about?
Tassels!
Tassels!
Gymnastics.
Thank you so much to Brian Cowen.
Web extended, by the way.
We had to pre-tape because he's in California time.
There's an extra 30 minutes for those who are Mug Club members.
He's a good guy.
He's a really fun guy.
Really smart, too.
A lot of people don't give him the credit that he deserves.
Introspective guy.
And we have some super videos coming up here soon.
As a matter of fact, after taping this show, we're going to be traveling to do something quite spectacular, we hope.
Or it could be nothing, and if that's the case, we'll never see it.
That's the chance.
Oh, right.
So, okay.
Something that I guess I would like to talk about, because it comes up quite a bit when we're At live shows, or we do the Life Advice Behind the Paywall.
First off, let me preface this.
I've talked about this.
I kind of have, what I need to work on myself, is I have two gears.
My wife has always said it's turbo and off.
And it's been a real struggle to sort of find that, that what we call sort of third gear.
In other words, I'm going, going, going.
I live life at extremes, and then I'm just off, and I don't want to do a whole lot.
And finding that energy to kind of still be moving, but not in a sprint, is tough.
That's my personality type.
But the worst part of anything, is, for me I realize about myself, is waiting on the tarmac.
Is that anticipation of the event, the nerves, the anxiety.
Just let you know how I've been.
And I think most people are this way, and you may not necessarily notice it.
And I did notice a pattern when I went back, all the way back to being a kid with auditions,
to stand-up shows, to before this show, before every time before we do a live show,
or even here in the studio, I'm always just a little bit, little bit antsy,
a little bit nervous, especially before live shows.
It's kind of an unwritten rule, like, just don't really talk to me because I won't remember it.
I get really, really anxious.
And I get really anxious, for example, if we're supposed to do a show and something gets delayed.
Or I'm sitting there, I'm sitting in a chair going, okay, are we going?
Are we not going?
Are we going?
Are we not going?
Big thing too was the Christmas show example comes to mind, where we were doing this big live stream, CNN, 16 hours.
I didn't sleep for days.
I actually punched a hole through a wall.
I didn't really mean to.
To be fair, it was a very old, brittle wall.
It was just like this.
I was like, damn it!
And it broke, so it sounds more impressive.
But it was because things got delayed, and I was sitting there in that holding pattern.
And I think a lot of people live their life in that holding pattern, thinking that the event or what they need to accomplish, what you need to accomplish, is scarier than it is.
This is something I've learned about myself, and you let me know if you've experienced this.
Prepare, set a plan, pull the trigger.
Do it.
Your mind is really your own worst enemy when it comes to these things.
Usually what you fear, what you build up in your mind, sitting in the tarmac, waiting, the anticipation is far worse than what actually happens.
I've just felt things really deeply this way.
When I was a kid, I would get dizzy Christmas Eve before Christmas morning.
I would go absolutely nuts because I would anticipate it in a positive way.
On the flip side of that coin, before every show was the exact same.
Before every single competition, I would feel like I was going to throw up.
I still often do.
But I have realized that usually it's not so bad.
I walk out on the stage, and then things fall into place.
And even if you bomb, it's not as bad as it is in your mind.
Usually what you fear and what you build up is a lot worse.
And it's one thing to tell people, or I could tell you right now, just do it.
Do the Shia LaBeouf.
Just do it!
All right?
Doesn't help.
Doesn't help you if you fear legitimate harm may come to you if you fail.
Right?
And I need to be honest.
Sometimes that's the case.
Most of the time, though, almost all of the time, aside from those extreme examples, it's just an ouchie.
You get an ouchie.
And that's an important thing.
Another difference between injuries, between things that you need to take, you need to take inventory of this and understand, okay, pull it back, and an ouchie.
That's another reason, by the way, in itself to get off of the tarmac, to get out of the holding pattern.
Ouchies are actually kind of a good thing.
Nicks and bruises, those are good things because those experiences, they toughen you up so you don't get a serious injury.
It's the same reason you go to the gym and you're sore right when you start working out and you're getting stronger, but oh my gosh, it's miserable, but you're doing that so that you don't throw your back out when you lift your kid up.
You're trying to get stronger in the gym, in a controlled environment where you can challenge yourself and just pull that Trigger.
Do it.
Start doing it.
It's never as bad as you anticipate.
Let me ask you, what would you rather have?
Ten scrapes and bruises, cuts, nicks, or one broken femur?
Because those scrapes, those bruises, they represent engagement, repetitions, training, practice.
In and of itself, it makes you less prone to serious injury or maiming.
And let's be honest, a life without any skinned knees... Think of a childhood.
Think of any kid you know who never skinned a knee, never had a few stitches.
That's a crappy childhood.
It's not a life worth living.
If you just played, for example, in the big game, and you come out without a scratch, what does that mean?
That usually means that someone else was moving up the field.
Someone else was making the big scores or the big saves.
And most of the time, not always, I know someone's going to say, well, I thought so when I got cancer.
I understand.
Extreme example.
Most of the time, they lived to play another game.
So I want you to do something for me, a little exercise.
I want you to think about something that you've been wanting to do, but feels maybe insurmountable.
Maybe not even insurmountable, just overwhelming.
We all get that feeling sometimes, being overwhelmed, right?
I get it daily.
Maybe it's a project.
Maybe it's a family issue that needs resolving.
Maybe it's getting in shape.
Maybe it's work.
Maybe it's cleaning your room on serotonin reuptake inhibitors.
You're a lobster, for all I know, and you've read your... I have no idea.
Just something that's been lingering on your to-do list that you know is important for you to do, but you haven't gotten to it yet.
Okay?
I want you to take a second.
I want you to think of something.
You got it?
Now, ask yourself honestly, why haven't you done it?
Why are you still sitting on the tarmac?
Get off of it!
The tarmac is the worst part.
It's loud, it's hot, it's sweaty, and you're not moving anywhere!
What do you have to do right now to get off of the tarmac?
Hit your pilot checklist and do it.
Set a plan, and at some point, good enough is good enough, just pull the trigger.
Go.
What you fear, the unknown, just like a monster movie, the unknown, living in that holding pattern, it's undoubtedly worse than what is most likely to happen, even in a worst case scenario.
And that's no way to live.
Make a plan.
Pull the trigger.
Get off the tarmac.
Let me know how it works out.
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