Ep. 203 – Panic on the Right dissects the 2016 election’s chaos: Trump’s leaked comments spark Republican backlash, with NBC hiding the tape for 11 years while Clinton dismisses outrage as trivial. Polls show him at 11%, yet media declares the race over unless a "miracle" occurs—ignoring WikiLeaks’ revelations of her elitism. Clavin mocks moral hypocrisy, framing the election as a flawed binary choice where infighting dooms Republicans, while tangents on The Exorcist and horror film openings (like Horror Hotel’s 40-minute witchy prologue) derail into absurdist detours. The episode ends with Yom Kippur wishes and a sign-off under the pseudonym "Neil Desperanda." [Automatically generated summary]
Donald Trump's campaign is in trouble as his foul-mouthed talk about women continues to send shockwaves through the political sphere.
Republicans are shocked to find that the loudmouthed, abusive Vulgarian they endorsed is a loudmouthed, abusive Vulgarian with a videotape that makes them look bad for endorsing him.
It was one thing for me to degrade myself and throw away all my principles to support Trump, said Senator John McCain.
But if Trump is going to make me look like I'm degrading myself and throwing away all my principles, then count me out.
McCain said he was withdrawing his support for Trump and shifting it to Peewee Herman, who has more dignity and acts more like an adult.
Trump voters who for years have been complaining that Republicans didn't know how to get down into the gutter to defeat Democrats are also shocked to discover that when they get down into the gutter to defeat Democrats, there's actually no longer any point in defeating Democrats because they are Democrats.
And of course, women who dress like sluts and allow famous rich men to treat them like dirt are shocked to find that famous rich men oggle them and feel free to treat them like dirt.
Feminists, on the other hand, who have demanded to be treated exactly like men, are shocked to find out that now men have no respect for them.
Feminist leader Hildegard Banshee said, quote, men are pigs and we want to be equal with them and then have men respect us for being women who are like men who are pigs.
When reporters mentioned that she was being irrational, Ms. Banshee complained that they were privileging the male trait of rationality over the female trait of blithering in a shrill voice and hoping men will give you what you want just to get some bloody peace and quiet.
Executives at NBC who were in possession of the Trump tape for 11 years before it was released said they were shocked to discover that they had known about the tape all the while they were making millions off Donald Trump's television show.
The executives swore that if they had only known they knew, they would have fired themselves.
As it is, they'll look sternly at themselves in the mirror and then forget the whole thing.
And of course, no one could be more shocked than the news media.
Former Clinton aide and now totally objective ABC News director George Sukhalubakis said in a statement, quote, I got so used to romanticizing the adulteries of John Kennedy and ignoring the adulteries of Ted Kennedy and disguising the adulteries of Bill Clinton and rationalizing the abuse of women by Hillary Clinton that I'm totally shocked to be shocked at how shockingly shocked I'm shocked, unquote.
Hillary Clinton said she hadn't been so shocked since last week when they used the defibrillation paddles to restart her heart.
And as for Donald Trump, he said he was utterly shocked to find out how despicable he was and said he would now be voting for Hillary Clinton, like everyone else in America.
Trigger warning, I'm Andrew Clavin and this is the Andrew Clavin Show.
I'm a hunky-dunky.
Life is tickety boom.
Birds are winging, also singing hunky-dunkity.
Ship-shaped ipsy-topsy, the world is a bitty zing.
It's a wonderful day.
Hoorah, hooray!
It makes me want to sing.
Oh, hurrah, hooray!
Oh, hooray, hurrah.
Panic running around, Republicans running around back and forth, shooting themselves in the foot, shooting each other in the back, stabbing each other in the back.
Oh, so it's October in an election year.
It's basically your typical Republican October in a presidential election year.
All right, we're on a little early today because I have to leave early.
And tomorrow is Yom Kippur, so no one will be here.
Yesterday, you know, I forgot yesterday was Columbus Day.
California, we don't really do a lot of Columbus Day stuff because everybody picks on him, you know, because he conquered the indigenous people, thereby violating Western values, which we wouldn't have except for Columbus Day.
So it's kind of like an infinite circle, but anyway, I forgot about Columbus Day.
But Yom Kippur is here.
I have to mention, since it is Yom Kippur, on Ricochet, this Orthodox Jewish writer, Gil Reich, wrote the nicest piece about my book, The Great Good Thing, a Secular Jew Comes to Faith in Christ.
And it's always difficult for Jews to read these books, but I've noticed that the more Orthodox they are, the more religious they are, the more understanding and sympathetic to the book they are.
And he points out, he just says a lot of nice things about it.
You can go and see it on Ricochet.
It's a very touching piece, I thought, and I was moved by it.
All right, so the GOP is falling apart, basically.
Trump's poll numbers are tanking.
A little tough to tell at the moment because he did seem to have won the debate.
And of course, the sex tape thing is everybody's going crazy over the sex tape thing, and I'm sure there are more to come.
The Wall Street Journal had a poll that had him 11%, 11 points behind Hillary Clinton.
The poll was a very small sample, taken at a very weird time.
It was almost like a poll in the making.
But the RCP, the Real Clear Politics average, has her up between 5% and 6%, which I'm probably pretty close to it.
And that's huge in October.
So things look bad for the Donald, you know?
The thing about Donald, he always reminds me of that old joke.
There used to be this old joke about a cartoonist who was a drunk, and he wrote this adventure cartoon.
So it was a serial, and every day the hero would get in trouble, and then the guy would get out of trouble.
And so he had this thing where the guy was in a pit, and he's surrounded by snakes, and the walls are closing in with spiked walls, and lions are pacing around, and he went off in a tear, and he got drunk, and nobody knew how to get this guy, to get the hero out of this, you know, out of the pit.
So they went searching for him all over town, finally found him, pumped him full of coffee, brought him into the cartoonist place, and he wrote, in a single leap, John was free.
It's like, that's Donald Trump.
Cheryl Atkins, the great former, the great investigative reporter at CBS, who had to leave because they wouldn't let her report on Obama.
So she actually quit so she could do investigative reporting.
She wrote, she sent out the abbreviated version of election coverage.
It went like this.
This is Trump announces his candidacy.
The coverage is this.
Trump is a clown.
Trump isn't serious.
He's secretly trying to get Hillary elected.
We, the media, refuse to cover his campaign.
We cover his campaign 24-7.
The polls are abysmal.
He'll never last.
He'll get crushed.
He should apologize.
He should withdraw.
He's had his worst week ever.
Republicans are bailing on him.
He's too offensive.
His polls are dreadful.
Trump's campaign is over.
Trump is finished.
He should apologize.
He doesn't really want to win.
Republicans will fix the convention.
So he doesn't win.
Trump has zero chance of getting the nomination.
Trump wins the nomination.
That was the coverage.
And it just goes on.
And she says it's basically the same with Hillary.
Just to stop for a moment and talk about these WikiLeaks letters from John Podesta.
You know, nothing has come out that is dreadfully corrupt about Hillary Clinton and this latest dump.
It's so many, this guy, you know, Wikileaks doesn't really know what it's doing if it wants to manipulate the American press.
They just throw out thousands of emails.
And you have to go.
But these are the emails from John Podesta, the campaign manager, the one that just got me, though.
Podesta says, yes, Hillary does hate everyday Americans.
She has come to hate everyday Americans.
It's like, you know, I don't know.
Is that disqualifying?
You know, you're going to be president and you hate us?
You know, like, I mean, that's not so.
All right.
But, you know, so the media is continuing in this Cheryl Atkinson vein.
They are declaring this over.
Here is Morning Joe, Joe Scarborough, polling his very intelligent trio of campaign watchers.
John Heilman, is this race over?
Is Hillary Clinton the next president of the United States?
Absent some dramatic, exogenous event.
Yes, I love it.
Exactly.
By the way, I love it.
You know, I mean, things can happen.
You know, I mean, one of them can get Hillary Clinton get hit by a bus.
Okay.
Well, that's how you're exactly.
All right.
Absent absent of being hit by a bus, Hillary Clinton would give it a break.
Metaphorically, I mean, we're still seeing, you know, I mean, I don't think it's a lot of people.
There could be something in one of these WikiLeaks dumps that turns out to be genuinely incriminating.
I mean, I'm not saying absence in October surprise.
Huge thing.
A huge thing.
A huge thing.
Hillary Clinton's a president.
The electoral dynamics are locked in.
Mark Calprin.
Just to be clear, I didn't say it was over last time you polled everybody.
I said it was not over, even when he was down.
Is it over now?
It is over.
Barring some intervening event.
And also, barring Donald Trump.
Donald Trump has to start talking about what he would do to make the lives of Americans better.
Donald Trump's not going to change.
You're going to win.
I'm saying, if that's the way he behaves, even with some intervening event, he can't win.
Really?
You think Hillary Clinton's next president of the United States?
If he keeps talking about this and not about how he'd make the lives of Americans better, yes.
Mike Barnacle.
It's over.
So there you have it.
You know, you don't even have to vote.
It's great.
And of course, the thing that's really dramatic at this point is this civil war that's opening up in the Republican Party.
Paul Ryan came out, and what he said was basically, I'm not going to campaign with this guy anymore, but I don't withdraw my endorsement.
So he's walking this fine line.
You have to remember, look, there's now a real possibility, a real possibility that the GOP could lose either the House or the Senate or both, which would be pretty disastrous.
If these guys, these down-ticket guys, you know, congressmen, senators, come out and they say, well, we hate Trump now, then the Trump voters turn up.
Now, remember, there's 45% of the electorate.
The Trump voters turn up, or whatever it is now, 38.
The Trump voters turn up and they'll vote for Trump, but they won't vote for the down-ticket guys.
Meanwhile, if you say, no, we still support Trump, then the people who just find Trump appalling show up and they won't show up.
They won't vote for you or Trump, and the Senate is gone.
And that's really, really a problem.
Because, you know, by the way, Trump, of course, with his usual restraint and class and sense of, you know, joie de V, is tweeting all these attacks on Ryan, saying, you know, you ought to do something about the country, the problems in the country, instead of attacking me.
And today, he tweeted, I think it was this morning he tweeted, I'm glad the shackles are off and I can finally fight for America.
And I was like, you know, put the shackles back.
If this is you with the shackles off, put the shackles back on, dude.
It's like a rumbay, you know.
Thank God we tranquilized him down.
So here's the W, the Wall Street Journal editorial.
One irony of this election is that as Mrs. Clinton has focused on disqualifying Mr. Trump's character and temperament, she has also released about 112,000 odd words of little notice policy proposals that a majority leader, Chuck Schumer, and Speaker Nancy Pelosi would be only too happy to rubber stamp.
See, this is the thing about the way the press covers elections: it's all, you know, he grabs crotches and she has these emails, but it's like, what do these people stand for?
What will they do?
The journal goes on, a new burst of liberal legislation could include a public option for Obamacare that would be one more giant leap toward government-run health care.
Energy from fossil fuels would become stranded assets.
That is, we wouldn't be able to frack and get the energy we need.
Government by and for the regulatory state would accelerate and the Supreme Court would be lost to judicial conservatives for a generation.
A final irony is that a Pelosi-Schumer Congress would readily pass the amnesty immigration bill that has animated Mr. Trump's campaign.
So, in other words, by Trump blowing this election so badly, more immigration would have the open borders that Hillary Clinton in these WikiLeaks says she wants.
I want, in one of her speeches, says she wants open borders.
That's her dream.
This prospect ought to concentrate Republican minds because House and Senate races are becoming more competitive as Mr. Trump slips.
But of course, we can't focus on that because we have to focus on Donald Trump talking about women's organs, okay?
And I got like a lot of flack yesterday for basically saying I didn't care about this.
And I have to tell you, I don't care about this.
I do not care.
This is not to condone it.
This is not to condone it.
I have a real problem with these scandals.
Let me read you something Dennis Prager wrote this morning.
And I'm sure, you know, I have this feeling we should probably do a debate show this week between me and Ben because I think Ben feels very differently about this.
And I really respect him.
I really respect what he feels, but I just don't care.
I do not care about politicians' sexualities.
I don't have that much respect for them to begin with, most, many of them.
And I just want to know how they're going to run the government.
You know, that's what's important to me.
Okay, so Dennis Prager says, regarding Donald Trump's private sexual comments, we are living through a national hysteria.
To understand how and why, it is necessary to understand the indispensable role hysteria plays on the left.
The left is always in major crisis mode.
And in nearly every case, the crisis is either wildly exaggerated or simply false.
You know, this is true because nothing the left does works.
The only way they can take the power that they want, take the power that they desire, is to get you so hysterical that you're looking the other way or you think it's a crisis and they have to be given that power to save us all.
For example, Prager goes on, few people deny that the earth is warming.
To assert that it is not is hysteria.
What is hysteria is the left's position is not hysteria.
I'm sorry, to assert that it is is not hysteria.
What is hysteria is the left's position that carbon emissions will destroy life on earth.
That is absolutely correct.
The world is warming.
It does this from time to time.
Many of our lakes used to be glaciers.
You know, many will be glaciers again.
We're on a rock circling into the sun, spiraling into the sun.
It gets colder and it gets warmer.
The widespread protests against the name Washington Redskins, pure left-wing hysteria.
They were ended only by the revelation through polling, that the vast majority of American Indians couldn't care less about the name.
The examples are endless, from the alleged epidemic of heterosexual AIDS in America and preschool molestation scares in the 80s to the wildly exaggerated dangers of secondhand smoke and the baseless fears about electronic cigarettes.
We are regularly forced to endure a new left-wing manufactured media supercharged hysteria.
The latest is the tsunami of horror in reaction to Donald Trump's gross and juvenile comments made in private 11 years ago.
The tsunami of condemnation of his remarks is quintessential left-wing hysteria that more than a few Republicans and conservatives have joined in is a testament to the power of mass media and hysteria to influence normally sensible people.
This is hysteria first and foremost because the comments were made in private.
They also need to ask themselves if it is worth giving the left wing, giving the left the White House over such trivia.
And then he goes on to say all the stuff that the Wall Street Journal says about what will happen if they win the House and Senate and the presidency.
Mainstream Media Hysteria00:13:25
And is it worth losing all that to condemn Trump's sloppy behavior?
I got to say goodbye to the folks on Facebook and YouTube.
Come on over to the Daily Wire.
There's more to come.
Here's my problem.
Okay.
Here's my problem with scandalmongering, especially sexual scandalmongering.
All yesterday, all I heard, because I said, you know, basically Trump was taught, was saying things that a lot of people say.
Now, by the way, I don't read what Trump said as saying that he actually commits sexual assault, which he may well do.
The guy's a reptile.
I'm not defending Donald Trump.
That has nothing to do with this.
He may well do that, but I didn't hear him saying that.
What I heard him say was, when I see women, I have to kiss them.
And boy, they'll let you do anything when you're a celebrity, even grab them by the crotch.
He also talked about committing adultery.
Do I approve of committing adultery?
Absolutely not.
I think it's a fool's game.
I've seen people do it.
It's a tragic, tragic thing to do, especially if you have little kids.
It's a horrible way to betray the partner of your life.
But he already bragged in his books that he committed adultery.
We knew he was an adulterer when we nominated him.
This sudden shock that just only means that the people who are suddenly shocked, so shocked, are the people who've now been caught endorsing somebody that they already knew was an adulterer.
I don't know if they just thought nobody would notice or what, but we already knew this about the guy.
My problem with scandal is the underlying appeal of scandal is the sense that it gives you that you are morally superior.
That's why people love scandal.
All those people saying to me, well, I've been in locker rooms and I have never said such a thing.
Good for you.
Good for you.
Let me quote to you my old friend, Uncle Jesus, okay?
Let's talk about Jesus.
You know, he said, you have heard that it was said, do not commit adultery, but I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman with lust in his heart has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
All right.
Now, did Jesus mean like, you know, it's just as bad to think lustfully as it is to commit adultery?
Of course he didn't mean that.
What he meant was, you're not kidding anybody.
You're not kidding anybody about who you really are.
And what scandal does is it gives all of us a chance to parade our virtue in front of each other.
It is just, it's just a lie.
It's a lie about who you really are.
When you acknowledge what you really are, what all of us, what all of us are, every one of us, men and women both, by the way, I mean, men have this sexual thing going on because they're so electrified by it all the time.
But, you know, none of us, you know, women have the gossip thing and the backbiting thing, and it's happening in their minds, even when they're not saying it out loud.
When you realize who you are, you're a little slower to judge.
Look, I don't, I keep saying this over and over again.
I don't like Donald Trump.
I think he's a terrible candidate.
I think we were totally, totally bamboozled by him.
And I'll get back to that in just a minute.
We were bamboozled when we nominated him.
I think it's a fool's game.
I think he could well not only lose the election, but lose us the Congress and all this stuff.
I don't care.
I already factored all my feelings about this in.
I don't care that he's now been caught saying ugly things.
That doesn't mean I condone it.
It just means that I don't feel morally superior.
I'm not going to parade my moral superiority at the cost of the House and Senate.
My sense of moral superiority is not worth the House and the Senate to me.
It's not worth, in fact, my sense of moral superiority is worth exactly buckets because I have no sense of moral superiority.
I understand that we are all, all of us, steeped in sin all the time.
The things that are going through in our mind.
When you tweet me and say, oh, I never heard a tale, I never heard such things.
I never said such things.
I know what you're thinking, pal.
Guess what?
You're not fooling anybody.
You're not fooling anybody.
So it's the hysteria that bothers me.
It's the preening that bothers me.
You don't cheat on your wife.
Good for you.
Neither do I.
I think it's despicable.
But is it my business?
Is it my business as he cheats on it?
You know, I'm sorry.
I don't really think that it is, especially in this world as it is.
And this is the other thing.
This is the other thing.
You know, you can't have this both ways.
Heather McDonald wrote about this today in City Journal.
She wrote about it yesterday.
Let me see if I can find her thing.
Yes.
She said, why might it be that men regard women as sex objects?
Surely the ravenous purchase by females of stiletto heels, push-up bras, butt-hugging mini skirts, plunging necklines, false eyelashes, hair extensions, breast implants, butt implants, lip implants, and mascara, rouge, and lipstick to the tune of billions a year has nothing to do with that.
Females would never ever exploit their sexuality to seek attention from men.
The sudden onset of Victorian vapors among the liberal intelligentsian political class at the revelation of Trump's locker room talk is part and parcel of the left's hypocrisy when it comes to feminism and sexual liberation.
But the feminists can't have it both ways, declaring that women should be equal to men in all things, and then still demand a chivalric deference to females' delicate sensibilities.
Either women are the same as men or they're not.
It is particularly galling to see the selective resurrection of Victorian values from the same crowd that has been pushing transgender locker rooms on the world in an effort to destroy the last shred of girls' innate sexual modesty.
My problem is not a moral problem.
I'm not talking about morals.
I live my life.
I try really hard to live my life by my lights.
I hope that everybody who knows me feels that my word is good, whether it's my word to stay faithful to my wife or my word to show up for dinner at 6 o'clock.
I mean, all those things matter to me a great deal.
Donald Trump is not that guy.
He was never that guy.
You could trust him when he said, you know, if you've been listening to this show, who's been telling you this stuff?
You know, I feel so much that we got gamed by the mainstream media even as we hated them.
You know, we hate the mainstream media and we hate them with good reason.
They're terrible.
They lie.
They are totally one-sided.
They just say over and over again, you know, they slant the news in favor of people like Hillary Clinton and against people like Ted Cruz, let alone Donald Trump.
They're terrible.
But at the same time, Donald Trump is their creation.
He is a creation of the mainstream media.
When you thought that he was a big, successful guy, when you thought that he was strong, when you thought that he was a good boss, all that stuff was a television show.
It wasn't real.
It was never real.
It was the mainstream media selling it to you.
You bought it.
Now you got him.
Now you got him.
This is the situation.
The situation is here he is, and he is exactly that.
There is not one word in that videotape.
There's not one word in that videotape that changes who you knew he was when you voted for him.
Or if you didn't vote for him, there's no difference.
The situation hasn't changed one bit.
I guess that's the point.
That's the bottom line.
The situation hasn't changed a single bit.
It hasn't changed at all.
So we're all still left with the same question.
And here's one more thing when you're judging, when you're trying to figure out what to do in this election, which is a very difficult, it's a very difficult decision when you have two bad people.
You're not the only person with a conscience.
This is the other thing that drives me nuts.
It drives me nuts about the commentariat.
They talk as if everybody else is out for themselves, but they are acting on principle.
All of these people, so many of these people, are acting on principle.
And in fact, even though I say a lot of nasty things about politicians, a lot of these politicians, you know, are they worried about their career?
Do they think about getting elected?
Of course they do.
Of course they do.
You know, when I write something, I want people to read it.
But that doesn't stop me from trying to write the truth.
It doesn't stop me from trying to write things that sometimes offend people.
It doesn't stop me from trying to write good things that people like.
I don't try to write bad things because, listen, I look at the bestseller list.
I know people can write bad things and make a lot of money.
I don't care.
That's not what I want to do.
I want to write good things, but I also want them to sell.
I want people to read them.
Politicians are the same way.
Of course, they have to calculate the odds.
They don't want to get thrown out of office where they can't do any good for anybody.
But a lot of them are people of conscience who are trying to figure out what's best for their constituents.
And remember, a congressman's constituents are like the six guys in his district.
They're not you.
They're not everybody.
And a senator's constituents are the people in his state.
And they're all trying to think of what's best for them.
These guys, you know, Paul Ryan, he's not being a bad guy.
He's wrestling with a difficult, difficult situation.
If he lets, if the House slips from his fingers, if it becomes, belongs to Nancy Pelosi again, you ain't going to like it.
So Paul Ryan is trying to figure out what is the best thing he can do while keeping his integrity to go forward and win that thing.
You know, you may disagree with him.
You may disagree with him.
I get it.
I get it.
You know, I disagree with a lot of people on this, and I've been really, really disturbed to watch them on the right tearing each other apart.
And there's more to come.
If this goes on this way and Trump loses, there is more civil war to come.
And when we are at civil war, when the right is at civil war, the left rejoices.
The left is in their element.
They love this.
Why shouldn't they?
If we tear each other apart, they're going to thrive.
Hillary Clinton's going to win.
They may lose the House.
They may lose the Senate while we tear each other apart.
My calculation right this minute, my calculation right this minute is it's a binary election.
One of these people is going to win.
I can't calculate.
Human events are too complex for me, with my little mind, to calculate what's going to happen six months in the future.
Could be war, could be plague, could be earthquakes in diverse places.
I don't know.
Jesus could come again.
We do not know what's going to happen that far in advance.
So I'm looking at this and thinking it's going to be Trump or Hillary.
As far as I'm concerned, I'm voting in the lizard world.
These are the lizards.
They are.
I have no affection for either person.
She is a corrupt, soulless woman, driven wholly by ambition at this point.
She lies when she doesn't have to.
I've never seen, that's not true.
I have seen it before.
I've seen people who lie when they don't have to.
I've never seen somebody this prominent who just lies.
You know, William Sapphire wrote this column many, many years ago.
He was the one conservative on the old New York Times, which actually was still a newspaper at the time.
You know, he said she's a congenital liar.
There's something about her.
I have known people like this.
Trump, you know, he's an ignoramus.
He's just blundering around.
He's not going to make America great again.
Believe me, the only people who are going to make America great again, and I've been saying this since I went on the air, the only people who are going to make America great again are you and me.
And we're only going to be able to do it if these clowns get out of our way and neither of these people is set to get out of our way.
Trump's not going to get out of your way.
He doesn't want to cut back on all the entitlements that are strapping the government down and getting in your way.
He's not going to, he says he'll cut back on regulation.
I buy that.
I could see that.
A businessman, he might cut back on regulation.
That would be a good thing.
There it is.
There's one good thing I can say about Donald Trump.
You know, I just feel like you have to accept this.
You know, I don't want to call it a tragedy, but when I say tragedy, I mean in the theatrical sense, that there are no good choices here.
There are no good choices here.
But sitting around letting yourself be manipulated by these clowns, these mainstream media clowns who have supported Teddy Kennedy, who have hidden away Bill Clinton, who never would have exposed his affair with Monica Lewinsky if Drudge hadn't put it up on his site.
These people are lying to you and releasing, they release this thing and they scream and yell and their hair's on fire and it's all about women.
It's all about this.
It's about nothing.
It's about nothing.
We knew what Donald Trump was before we nominated him.
Now we know it again.
Congratulations.
It's the same thing with WikiLeaks, by the way.
So far, what do we learn?
Hillary Clinton says things that are untrue and she hates the American people.
Is that new information?
I don't think so.
I don't think so.
I always knew that.
All I'm saying is that the situation remains exactly the same and the stakes remain exactly the same.
And you have to decide in your own conscience and on your own time what it means at this moment to fight for America.
I don't care about the Republican Party.
I care about this country.
I care about the principles that this country embodies, which are the principles of liberty, the principle of small government, so people can do whatever the hell they want and build a country from the bottom up.
You know, I mean, that's what I care about.
Nobody represents that in this election, so all I can do is calculate how I can best use my little vote in a state where it's not going to matter that much anyway to do the best things.
But to get hysterical about this stuff is to be played for a fool.
To get hysterical about Donald Trump's vulgarity and his attitude toward women, whether you're a woman or a man, is to be played for a fool.
And that's all I'm saying.
And it's working.
It is working.
Congratulations.
You know, congratulations to my mainstream media friends.
You're despicable.
Congratulations.
All right, stuff I like.
I want to just catch up on a couple of things.
I started watching stuff on network TV, and I don't watch a lot of network TV.
It doesn't work for me somehow.
It just doesn't have the kind of depth and insight that a lot of the cable stuff has.
Occasionally, that's untrue.
Occasionally, something good will come up on network TV, but I was just sampling stuff and I watched Lethal Weapon, and I just continued to watch these things a little bit.
Lethal Weapon, you know, it's like, I have to admire it.
Spooky Movie Openings00:04:25
It's a little action movie every week.
But I'm getting tired of that.
The whole point of an action movie is every now and again the wife goes away for the evening and I pour myself a scotch and I watch an action movie.
I don't want to see one every week.
It's just a little mindless, but good acting, a lot of fun.
You know, I'm now tired of it.
The Exorcist has gotten better.
The Exorcist started out really dull, but now it's gotten pretty spooky and really kind of interesting.
And I'm actually, it's actually getting better each time.
Westworld I saw again last night.
I gotta say, I'm finding this so slow.
Are you watching this?
Have you guys watched it?
I really like it.
You love it.
You love it.
Austin loves it, so you know it's lousy.
No, I just find it really slow, you know.
But it has got some interesting ideas.
My stuff I like for Halloween, you've never heard this before.
Three bad movies with spectacularly great openings, okay?
The three scariest openings in bad movies ever.
And one of them is not only an opening, it's actually the first 40 minutes of an hour and a half film.
So it's almost like half the film.
The first one is a 1960s Christopher Lee film called Horror Hotel.
The British name for it was City of the Dead.
And it's a story of a young woman researcher played by Venetia Stevens.
I think it's the only thing she ever did.
But she goes off to investigate this Salem town.
And she picks up a guy, gives a lift to a guy on the way in, and she's looking around this old-fashioned town.
Here's a clip from it.
Just like a picture out of a history book.
I feel as though I were in the 17th century.
Why hasn't Whitewood been written about?
If I have a beaten path, you tourists come here.
For Whitewood, time stands still.
Look at that church.
Must have been beautiful.
What a shame they let it get so run down.
Straight on?
Yes, follow the road around.
Oh, there it is.
A lovely old building.
17th century at least.
How picturesque can you get?
Right by the graveyard.
Yes, it has not been used for more than 200 years.
Any witches buried there?
There are indeed.
All in a section of unconsecrated ground.
Spooky, isn't it?
Well, keep your fingers crossed for me, Mr. Keene.
I hope Mrs. News has that run.
And she turns around and he's gone.
So the first 40 minutes of this film are one of some of the most spooky, frightening stuff I've ever had.
I saw it when I was 10 years old.
I was awake for days.
I don't think I slept for the next week after I saw this.
The rest of the picture, you know, by then it's almost over.
You'll watch the second half of the picture, but it's just not that good.
Another one, 2001, Jeepers Creepers, the first 20 minutes of this film, which is one of the worst horror movies I've ever seen.
This is one of the worst horror movies I've ever seen.
The first 20 minutes are so frightening, I thought I was watching a classic.
It was like watching a toy fall off the end of a desk.
You know, it was going along like, wow, it's marching right along, you know, and it's really, really frightening after the first 20 minutes.
And you'll know when it's over, in both of these cases, you'll know, you know, when the opening is over.
It's awful.
I mean, it's awful, but the first 20 minutes, absolutely terrifying.
Finally, the Twilight Zone movie from 1983 opens with a five, six-minute thing between Albert Brooks and Roger, and Dan Aykroyd.
And Roger Aykroyd was the Agatha Christie character.
Dan Aykroyd and Albert Brooks do a little bit in a car for the first six minutes.
Really spooky, really fun.
The rest of the movie stinks.
So those are three things you can actually watch in one evening.
It all makes one, you know, 40 minutes, 20 minutes, and six minutes.
That makes like one movie.
You can just watch the openings of these three pictures.
Really, really scary openings to really, really bad movies.
All right.
Have a wonderful Yom Kippur if you're celebrating Yoam Kipper.
If you're not, we're going to miss the mailbag this week, I'm afraid, but we will be back on Thursday.