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July 28, 2023 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:51:00
Joe Rogan Experience #2014 - Jim Gaffigan
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jim gaffigan
01:20:45
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joe rogan
01:26:44
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b-real
00:03
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jamie vernon
00:20
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unidentified
Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day!
Yeah, I know, I just saw that clip of Jordan.
jim gaffigan
I don't miss it either.
joe rogan
Yeah, he's got weird autoimmune issues.
So for him, there was like an elimination diet, and he found out there was just a bunch of things that his body was reacting to in a very negative way, and one of them apparently was vegetables.
A lot of it is like just complex carbohydrates.
You know, a lot of it is bread and pasta and stuff like that.
A lot of people get really inflamed eating that, and it causes a host of issues.
jim gaffigan
Isn't that crazy?
I mean, it's...
Well, eventually, isn't there, you know, like, even the problem with chemo, you know, I'm a guy who tells diarrhea jokes, so I know a lot about this.
Isn't the expectation that if they could kind of concierge your cancer treatment to your specific type of cancer for your type of body or your type of cells, that that's why people are going to be able to live to 100?
Rich people are going to be able to live to 100?
joe rogan
I think there's definitely a lot of research that's done in that way, but I also think that there's so many factors when it comes to cancer.
There's environmental factors, there's lifestyle factors, like what you're eating, like how much stress you're under.
There's a lot of genetic issues.
There's a lot going on when it comes to cancer.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
I mean, there is like, I mean, you just hear about, you know, people from the Philippines, like an entire family, everyone died of cancer at 40. And you're like, eh.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
What's going on there?
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know?
joe rogan
Unfortunately, some of it is genetic.
Some people just have a shit roll of the dice.
Genetically.
jim gaffigan
Are you saying that because I have all recessive genes?
joe rogan
Do you?
jim gaffigan
I mean, I am literally...
I'm like, everything's recessive.
I literally went into the dermatologist and he's like, you know what, we're just gonna...
I don't know if you ever get the cancer stuff, the basal cells.
He's like, we should probably just chop off your arms.
Because they're just all basal cells.
So it's like, I am...
You know, all recessive genes.
Blonde hair, blue eyes, pale skin.
joe rogan
How did really white people deal with the sun back in the day before sunscreen?
jim gaffigan
Well, I think some of it is, you know, if they're in Northern Ireland or Scotland, I think it's all right.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
And they're also not living past 40, right?
Yeah.
Right?
I mean, they're kind of...
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
They're like, look at this thing called alcohol.
And then they're like, let's do this for the rest of the time we're on Earth.
joe rogan
Well, back then, like in the early, early days, they drank it because a lot of water was tainted.
jim gaffigan
Right.
Oh, yeah.
During Jesus' time...
joe rogan
Everyone drank wine and beer.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, that's why the apostles fell asleep, is because they weren't drinking water.
It was cheaper to drink wine.
And it was more of a party atmosphere.
joe rogan
And probably better for you than getting horrible toxins in your water.
Viruses and bacteria and whatever the fuck is in still water that's sitting around for a while.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
Is there any difference between any of these waters?
Because there's, oh, this water.
I mean, I like Fiji water.
Hopefully they'll send me a case now.
joe rogan
It's supposed to be pretty good.
jim gaffigan
But is there...
And that's got to be very good for the environment to have water shipped from an island in the North Atlantic.
joe rogan
Sure, as long as they're using fossil fuels to get it here.
jim gaffigan
I mean, there's water 10 feet from me, but I'd like to get mine from this Nordic country that's really far away.
No, but is there any difference between these waters?
Yeah.
Except for the Poland Springs.
joe rogan
There's a guy that Tom Segura and Christina Pazitzki have had on their show.
What's his name?
Martin Rintz?
I forget what his name is.
He's an actual water connoisseur, like a water expert.
jim gaffigan
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
And he rates the different mineral content in waters.
jim gaffigan
So he's like a sommelier for water.
joe rogan
Yeah, a sommelier of water.
jim gaffigan
Oh, that's so interesting.
joe rogan
What is his name?
Martin Rees.
Martin Rees, yeah.
Interesting guy.
And he talks to them about water.
He brought a bunch of different kinds of water and tells them what's good and what's bad.
You really ideally want water in a glass bottle.
You don't really want it in plastic.
There's a lot of issues with plastic, with leaching.
You don't know what's happening between the time it gets bottled and how it gets shipped to you.
It could be sitting in the sun.
It could be sitting in a hot warehouse and plastic bottles leach these chemicals into the water, which are endocrine disruptors.
Not good.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
No, that's scary.
joe rogan
Even water.
jim gaffigan
Even water.
Well, I remember I watched this thing about, I don't know, all the plastic that's in the ocean and then the fish eat the plastic.
And I just was like, I'm so relieved I don't like fish.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Because you're always like, oh, fish is so good for you.
And I'm like, well, now I'm going to stick to burgers.
joe rogan
There's mercury, too.
Mercury is a big one.
jim gaffigan
There's a lot of plastics in there that some of these fish, they can't mate or whatever.
I don't know.
I know I sound scientific.
joe rogan
You're so specific.
Did you do a lot of research?
jim gaffigan
They can't do things?
joe rogan
They can't mate or something?
jim gaffigan
They can't mate?
joe rogan
They're not interested?
jim gaffigan
They're not interested.
joe rogan
Yeah, not good.
And a lot of people think that when you recycle plastic bottles that they get recycled, but they don't.
I think it's something around the neighborhood of 90% of all plastic single-use bottles get put into landfills.
Or they get shipped to other countries, and other countries wind up polluting with them.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
So what's the solution?
joe rogan
Well, really, there are biodegradable plastics, and biodegradable plastics that are made out of hemp fiber.
That's a real thing.
They can make plastic made out of things other than petrochemical products.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, but isn't it a little bit like the fake sugar?
I had a joke about it.
When we were growing up, there was saccharin, and they're like, oh no, it causes cancer.
And they're like, oh, here's a new fake sugar.
And then two years later, that one causes cancer.
It's like everything causes cancer.
joe rogan
They're just coming out now about aspartame.
They're talking about aspartame, which everyone's been saying, that's the one that's okay.
I'm like, no, that's not good for you either.
jim gaffigan
It's just sugar is the great Satan, right?
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's just not good in the form that we have it, mostly.
You know, mostly it's added sugar to things.
And sugar from fruit is fine, because it comes in a digestible way.
It's connected to fiber, it's connected to the material of the fruit.
It's good for you.
It's actually, it's okay.
I mean, it has sugar, but the way your body digests it, it processes the fiber, it's a slower release.
What's really bad is drinking sugar.
When you're drinking Coca-Cola, that is alien to your body.
Your body is like, how is this here?
There's nothing in nature that gives you sugar in that form.
jim gaffigan
Did you ever see that video of the evolution of the...
Because Coca-Cola in the 20s or 30s used to be something that...
You would go down to the soda shop and you would get a tiny bottle of Coke and you'd kind of have a tiny...
And then just the size is growing over decades.
It's just your thing.
joe rogan
Yeah!
jim gaffigan
And then the 7-Eleven slushie is just bananas.
joe rogan
You're mainlining sugar just right into your blood.
jim gaffigan
Alright, so I think that everyone understands that, like, sodas...
Because I want you to get sued by the Coca-Cola company and the Pepsi company.
But that is something that is obviously...
But I think most...
Even people that do drink Diet Cokes are like, I know this is bad.
You know what I mean?
But I do think that we as a society have embraced the fact that social media is one of the worst things that has happened to human beings ever.
Ever.
joe rogan
For sure, for health.
For, like, mental health?
jim gaffigan
Mental health.
joe rogan
Yeah, for sure.
It's terrible.
There's documentation.
There's a great book called the...
What is it?
The American Mind, the Jonathan Haidt book.
What is it called?
Coddling of the American Mind.
And it documents the self-harm and suicide rates of young kids, particularly girls.
It's real bad.
It's a lot of online bullying between each other, like hate and vitriol, and just the comparing themselves to other people unfavorably.
And now with filters, and you're essentially comparing yourself to fiction.
jim gaffigan
It's interesting when you consider for generation upon generation, people would look at their parents and their parents would say, you know, I had to walk five miles to school.
I had to walk uphill both ways and all that.
And I look at my teenagers and I'm like, oh, they have it harder.
They definitely have it harder.
Like, you know, like...
In high school, dealing with, you know, you were compared to people in your high school.
Now these kids are compared to everyone on the internet.
It's like the, just the, you know, the, the acts, you know, like the, you know, like we used to, when we were kids, you're like, hey, Tommy's dad who's divorced has a Playboy.
We're going to go over there and we're going to look at it in a field.
Like we did that when we were like 13. Yep.
And now it's like the porn is thrown at you.
And so, like, I look at, you know, I think kids got it much harder.
joe rogan
They definitely have it much harder psychologically.
Yeah, no doubt.
And just the online bullying and the way they tweet to each other and leave Instagram messages and Snapchats, it's just, it's evil.
And they do it to each other on a daily basis and it's a normal thing for kids to just be real shitty to each other online.
jim gaffigan
And they don't have to see the reactions.
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah.
jim gaffigan
And it is strange, because among, you know, there is this kind of the banter of the, you know, the greatest form of affection you can give another comedian is to give them shit, right?
But that's also...
You also can get a temperature of how they're truly responding to it.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
You guys pick on Bert and everything, but if you got a sense that it was truly hurting his feelings, you would be more constructive about it.
joe rogan
Yes, for sure.
jim gaffigan
You know what I mean?
joe rogan
For a little bit, and then go right back to it.
jim gaffigan
Then you go back to it.
And then he would be like, excuse me, I have to go sit on my pile of Jimmy Buffett-like money.
unidentified
LAUGHTER Because he is the- Margaritaville.
jim gaffigan
He's going to have the machine restaurants.
It's just inevitable.
joe rogan
Yeah, he has to have them.
They'll be in Florida.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But they will be, and there will be, it is, it's just inevitable.
joe rogan
The worst food for you.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
For sure.
Yeah.
It'll be great.
jim gaffigan
And by the way, he's going to outlive everyone.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
That's the great irony.
He's going to be crying at your funeral.
joe rogan
He's having so much fun, and yet he's so unhealthy.
But yet he's always laughing and having fun.
There's got to be a balance in there that's being achieved.
jim gaffigan
He's so unhealthy, but you see him snowboarding.
He's not like somebody...
Like, there is...
joe rogan
It's not ambulatory.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And, you know, like, when I think of how my dad used to drink, like, my dad would come home, he would have a vodka, and then at one point he would switch to scotch.
I thought that was normal.
I'm like, you know when your dad has two vodkas and then he switches...
But he would wake up the next morning and be fine.
And I kind of look at Bert the same way.
It's like he has a stamina.
I mean, some of it's for show, obviously.
But he has a stamina that is...
Unusual.
He really is the machine.
joe rogan
Yeah, he's got a very unusual tolerance for alcohol.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
And he's accustomed to feeling like shit and recovering.
He does a lot of stuff like saunas and cold plunges and he gets IVs and he does a lot of stuff to try to mitigate the effects.
But yeah, he's going hard.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
It's crazy.
I'm jealous.
I'm jealous.
Yeah, you know, I have like, yesterday was our anniversary and I had a glass of champagne with my wife and halfway through dinner I was starting to get the headache.
I'm like, what the hell's happening to me?
I just can't.
My body's like, whoa, whoa.
joe rogan
Yeah, when I take time off of drinking, like we do Sober October every year, and then I'll have a day when we go back, we get fucked up, and the next day I'm like, I'm not doing this anymore.
This is over.
jim gaffigan
And so how is your drinking change?
Like, all right, so on an average week, how often do, you know, like, because alcohol is different from, like, consuming, like, getting high in other ways.
Because alcohol seems kind of counter to the Joe Rogan lifestyle thing of, like, or are you sitting there going, oh, this special cumin-enlaced vodka has zero calories.
unidentified
No.
jim gaffigan
So how often during the week do you get wasted?
joe rogan
Well, because I own a club, and because I'm in my club all the time, I very rarely drink drink.
I'll have a drink.
Before a show, like last night, I had a half of a drink.
Ron White was there and he had his tequila and he was pouring drinks for everybody.
So I had a sip of his tequila.
I had a little bit.
But when I smoke pot or anything else, it's just no big deal.
The next day I feel fine.
It's not wrecking me.
jim gaffigan
But you're inhaling, and now I sound like the Puritan, you're inhaling your lungs.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But you're doing it in a way where it's not damaging the lungs?
joe rogan
Well, it's probably not good for your lungs to just inhale burnt plant fiber.
It's probably not good.
But it doesn't show cancer on the levels that you see from people that are cigarette smokers.
You also don't smoke as much.
You take a couple of hits before a show.
It's not like you're sitting there with a pack of cigarettes and you're doing it every day.
jim gaffigan
Right, right.
joe rogan
It's different.
jim gaffigan
Right.
Or you're not living next to a chemical plant.
joe rogan
You know, environmental fact, you're like working in a chemical plant.
Like, people that have to work with chemicals, like, that's fucking horrible.
People paint cars and shit like that, like...
That's rough.
jim gaffigan
Do you ever look at the Europeans, the way that some of our foods have genetic modified things, and then the Europeans are like, no, we're not going to do that.
I'm like, are we doing it wrong?
joe rogan
We're definitely doing it wrong.
jim gaffigan
And so why isn't there...
This groundswell, I mean outside of the obvious thing of financial interests of major corporations corrupting our political system, but like why is there not kind of people saying this is insane?
joe rogan
Because of the financial issue.
It's 100% because of that.
Because they've co-opted the media and the media doesn't report on all these things.
You know, the media doesn't report on so many things that are bad for you, because it's bad for their interests.
jim gaffigan
Well, let me ask you this, and we'll be right back to the Jim Gaffigan show in a minute.
I'm here with Joseph Reagan?
Rogan.
No, let me ask you this.
So, alright, so, Sam Bankman-Fried.
unidentified
Just got off of all charges.
joe rogan
That's totally not corrupt.
By the way, he deserves to be free.
jim gaffigan
You think he deserves to be free?
joe rogan
Yeah, go back to doing meth and hanging out with that little floozy in that house that you had with 40 other people and banging each other.
jim gaffigan
Occasionally, when he would be in court in a suit, I would be like, oh, that's so cute, he's got a suit on.
It's kind of like, you know, a boy at a bar mitzvah's confirmation.
It's just like, aw, look at him in his suit.
joe rogan
Like a real man.
jim gaffigan
But, alright, let me ask you this.
joe rogan
Feds drop campaign contributions charged against Sam Bankman-Fried.
b-real
But is that all his charges about everything?
joe rogan
Are there other charges that are still available, or is he a free man now?
jim gaffigan
I think they said he had to get a haircut, which is really weird.
joe rogan
Okay, federal prosecutors are dropping campaign finance violation charges against alleged crypto crook Sam Bankman-Fried over a legal snafu in his extradition from the Bahamas to the US. Still faces 12 other charges in the case.
Five more of those counts are still in question because they were added after he was extradited.
It seems to me like the fix is in.
jim gaffigan
Well, let me ask you this.
Any comedian would look at that and go, alright, so somebody in the Justice Department was like, he donated a lot to our people, let's make this go away.
But here's...
Here's a question I have.
So, there is that level of corruption, but do you look at that level of corruption and see it as equal to what Trump has been repeatedly busted as?
Do you see those as equal, or do you see like...
That as...
Because, you know, like, I wonder if...
Like, to me, it's like, you know, like, the indictments against Trump, I'm like, it's gonna keep going, right?
There's gonna be more things.
Whereas, like, this is...
Vague corruption.
I'm not justifying it, but like I feel like some people see this as totally equal.
You think both sides are equally bad.
joe rogan
You would have to go over the case, right?
Because the way it's been described to me and the way the CEO was looking at it, he was saying that this is fraud.
This is like straight-out fraud.
It's financial fraud and they were They were taking clients' money and using it in a way that they were not supposed to.
They were funneling it off to Almeida.
He was not being honest about his connections to that.
I don't know all the absolute specifics of the case, but the way it's been described to me is that there is not enough regulation in cryptocurrency and that these people are allowed to do some really shady shit and that these people took it to the far end of this. but the way it's been described to me is that And they were making insane amounts of money and they were doing amphetamines and they were hanging out and having this polyamorous lifestyle with these bunch of super nerds banging each other.
jim gaffigan
You shouldn't go to jail for that.
Not yet.
joe rogan
Not for banging each other.
No, I think that's fun.
I'm happy that they get to live like that.
Like these socially awkward weirdos, all of a sudden they're super rich.
If they were doing it above ground, everything was cool, I would be celebrating them.
I'd be like, yay, look at these.
They won.
But a lot of people lost a lot of money.
And, you know, there was also, they were being exposed by competitors, by Binance, and then it turns out that Binance is fucked too, and they're up their ass with a microscope, and they might have...
All sorts of problems and fraud and all sorts of other things that are being lobbied against them or leveled against them.
I don't know.
It's a lot of complicated financial stuff that's outside of my realm of understanding.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, it is interesting because the basic premise—again, I know nothing about crypto—but isn't the basic premise of crypto is, like, there's no regulations?
This currency is outside of—it's not tied to the dollar.
There's an independence there.
So you can't compare that to Martha Stewart going to jail for insider trading.
joe rogan
Well, yeah.
I mean, the Martha Stewart thing is interesting because Congress does what she did all the time.
I mean, they get access to information.
jim gaffigan
Oh, yeah.
That happened during the pandemic.
Tons of times.
joe rogan
I mean, and it's not just a Democrat thing.
Everybody points to Nancy Pelosi.
It's like literally 100% black and white.
I mean, excuse me, red and blue.
It's like across the board.
They're all doing it.
And it's just something that I think everyone does that's there.
They understand bills that are going to be passed, and then they immediately start buying stocks.
And they've always done that.
And it's one of the reasons why they want to be congressmen in the first place.
jim gaffigan
It's one of the reasons why they go in with a certain income and leave millionaires.
joe rogan
Not just millionaires, like insanely rich, hundreds of millions of dollars for six-figure salaries.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah, look, Nancy Pelosi is a better stock trader than both Warren Buffett and George Soros.
jim gaffigan
Her husband is an investment guy, right?
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Or he was an investment guy.
joe rogan
Well, he is when he works with her.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
Like, she knows things.
He bets.
You know, he places the stock options and whee!
jim gaffigan
Right.
And then he gets hit in the head with a hammer.
I remember all the senators that pulled out Richard Byrd and Kelly Loeffler and all these guys right when the pandemic.
And they sold their stocks and then they said everything's fine.
Right?
So it's like some of it is selling stocks.
It's not necessarily even buying.
joe rogan
Sure.
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But yeah.
joe rogan
It's having information that would allow you to make not just an educated guess.
But you know what's going to happen.
You know what's going to happen and you know that because of these decisions that are being passed that these companies are going to become far more valuable because they've got certain deals and then you bet on that.
And that's what it is.
It's insider trading.
We all know it is.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
It's, you know, there's the corruption, but it's also like that, because I have a 19-year-old daughter, and she's amazing, and she is not, like, if I brought up the idea of her pursuing a career based on financial security, she would be offended.
And I say that with a little bit of a joke, because I also remember, like, comedians, people that go into comedy are not like, you know, we didn't know it was going to be this type of business.
We went into it because it was, you know, creatively fulfilling to get on stage and make strangers laugh.
But, like, there is something, at least for me, having five kids, it's like, I really didn't care about money.
You know, in my 30s, I remember my parents died and people were, you know, like, all my siblings came around and we were getting stuff and I was like, I'll take the immigration papers, you guys can have the rest.
And so, like, I was the youngest, but, like, the point I'm getting to, as you get older...
Once you get a taste for comfort, it's, you know, because I've tried to articulate to my children, you know, money is about freedom.
You know, it's like the freedom to, like, afford to go on a date, you know, the freedom of independence.
Like, I don't have to ask mom and dad for my help, for help.
And so, but there is, you know, the perspective that changes.
And I'm not saying all people, but, like, when you're 20...
All right, do I have enough money to get beer?
You know what I mean?
As opposed to like when you're 40, you're like, all right, I might need knee replacement surgery.
Do you know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
And like there is some, you know, comforts.
You like comforts.
Yeah.
joe rogan
You don't want to struggle.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
And you don't want to be scared as to where your next paycheck's coming from.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
I mean, I fly commercial, and I fly business class, and it's amazing.
And if I have a gig and they're like, I would have to fly and coach, I'm like, I don't know if I want to do it.
Do you know what I mean?
Like, I'm kind of a...
You know, it's like, is it worth being really uncomfortable for a bunch of hours?
Like, I have...
Like, I live in New York and I work at...
Wynn has...
Wynn's a great casino, right?
And they have this theater, and it's a great thing.
And so there used to be all these direct flights from New York that, I mean, there's tons, but there were some live flat things.
And they were like...
joe rogan
Live flat?
jim gaffigan
Yeah, so like where you, you know, it's like the seat turns into a bed.
joe rogan
Oh, live flat.
jim gaffigan
And so from New York, it's like a five-hour flight.
And so they essentially started getting rid of those things, and I'm like, I don't know if I want to perform in Vegas anymore.
It's like, I'm such a baby.
I'm like, LA? Yeah, there's Lifeline.
I'll do that.
Anyway, I'm just trying to impress everyone with my toughness, my mental grit.
A baby can't be uncomfortable for a couple hours.
joe rogan
You can definitely get used to comfort.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
But it's probably not good for kids to grow up that comfortable.
jim gaffigan
No.
joe rogan
It's interesting.
You know, it's like we all...
Everyone that I know that's interesting had a pretty shitty childhood and rough and difficult and a lot of problems and...
But none of those people want that for their children.
Even though it made them the most interesting people that I know.
Because they got through some hard times and difficult childhoods and struggle.
And they developed discipline and character and the ability to overcome adversity.
jim gaffigan
I mean, parenting is terrifying.
joe rogan
It is.
jim gaffigan
It's terrifying.
joe rogan
It's a complicated world.
jim gaffigan
Because you know you're going to suck at it, but it's like, how much damage can you do?
Yeah.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
And how much damage does the world do?
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's not just you.
It's like, what are your children getting exposed to at school?
What are your children getting exposed to on the streets?
jim gaffigan
Yeah, because when they reach a certain age where you can hear them actively not listening to you, and you're like, oh, I hope your peer group is communicating some of this stuff.
Because I've said it six times, and you're obviously not hearing it.
You know what I mean?
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
It's really...
And it's when you have young kids, you think, oh...
Because I think our society, we kind of portray...
unidentified
You know, babies.
jim gaffigan
Oh, I couldn't sleep last night.
My baby was crying.
I had to change poopy diapers.
And that's the easy part.
That's the easy part.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's just lack of sleep.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
But, like, when it's Saturday night and they're out, and you're like, what?
Where are they?
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
Going to parties.
jim gaffigan
It's terrifying.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And who knows what's happening at these parties.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And again, it's also...
I mean, there is, you know...
There has been, you know, again, going back to like these teenage kids, I would say like 13 to 19. I mean, you know, up, you know, some of them missed graduation from high school.
Some, you know, some of it was just a year.
Some people it was two years.
But it is...
social media it's like also you know you know the generation of our comedians you know we were I mean how many benefits did you do about legalizing pot decriminalizing pot let's get rid of all these rules and then so what happens in Manhattan is it's decriminalized right so like every bodega Is selling weed.
But since it's decriminalized, the police are like, we got enough on our hands.
And it's decriminalized.
joe rogan
I think it's legal in New York now.
jim gaffigan
But here's what happens.
Is that like...
My barber opens a weed shop.
Everyone has a weed shop.
But unlike LA, where it feels organized, in New York, it's a little bit of the Wild Wild West.
And so there's these two stores.
And again, there's no supervision.
So one store starts selling mushrooms, you know, kind of like discreetly.
Some of them starts, you know, they'll sell it to a kid that's 13.
Whereas in L.A. and Colorado, I don't think that happens.
And so as a result, what's happening in New York is that there's kids that like are getting stuff that since it's not regulated, they're getting stuff that's laced with stuff.
And so instead of smoking, you know, spending your age of 16 years old smoking oregano for three months, these kids are smoking some of the most powerful stuff that's laced with shit.
And then there's kids that are like, you know, there's kids jumping off buildings.
You know what I mean?
And the thing is, is like it's not talked about because it's, you know, some of these wealthy parents, there's so much shame about – I mean, I have no idea.
I can't even contemplate what it would be like.
But it's not in the news.
It's not like where I grew up in Indiana.
It's like, oh, that town, there's meth there.
You know what I mean?
It's not like that.
It's like...
There's a cover-up.
Like, this kid was going to go to this great college, and he got stoned off of a vape pen that was laced with, you know, whatever that stuff that they get from China.
unidentified
Fentanyl?
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And he jumped off a building.
And the kid wasn't suicidal.
The kid wasn't a total fuck-up.
It was...
And so instead of that being in the news, the family's like, you know, it's brutal.
And again, it's very similar to, you know, just the mental health crisis.
It's a tsunami what these kids are facing.
joe rogan
Yeah, there's a lot going on.
The fentanyl thing is a giant issue.
It's killing 100,000 people every year in this country.
Fentanyl overdoses.
Young people.
jim gaffigan
And why is...
I mean...
You know, that's a lot of people.
joe rogan
That's a lot of people.
jim gaffigan
And is there...
Now, have you ever heard of how this is in response to the Opium Wars?
Did you ever hear about that?
joe rogan
That it's in response to the Opium Wars?
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
How so?
So, you know, I've performed in China a couple times.
Now I'm never going to be able to perform there after saying this.
But, like, essentially...
During the Opium Wars, it's like the British were trying to take over China, and they were trying to trade, and essentially nothing was working.
So what they essentially did is they got an entire generation of Chinese addicted to opium, and they destabilized, and then they could take it over.
And the British did a lot of nice things in India and all over the world, but...
This is like one of the things that, you know, among the expats that were performing stand-up in China would tell me about, is that like, oh yeah, this fentanyl is all kind of like revenge for that.
And that, so they make it, they sell it to the cartels of Mexico, and it's just going to get in.
But like, so what is the, because the question is, what is the motivation behind them doing this?
It's kind of like, you hold a grudge.
You know, it's like, you literally, you know, this great nation that has, you know, Thousands-year-more history than most Western countries was essentially the British came in and they drugged them.
And I can just see my comments right now.
You know nothing.
And by the way, I do know nothing.
But this is what...
It's an interesting explanation, right?
joe rogan
Well, the Opium War is a historical fact.
jim gaffigan
Yes.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's true.
jim gaffigan
But, like, that's the reasoning behind fentanyl being kind of sold to the cartels.
joe rogan
I think it probably has a factor.
And I think another factor is just financial interest.
jim gaffigan
It's just so cheap, right?
joe rogan
It's so cheap.
They make the precursors.
They bring them over to Mexico.
They sell them to the cartels.
And they produce fentanyl.
The United States has a massive appetite for illegal drugs and it's also part of the war on drugs because of the fact that it's illegal.
It's very difficult to get and you have to get it from criminals.
So it pumps up the criminals.
So the cartels make insane amounts of money and they have a business in bringing stuff across the border into America.
There's also a financial interest in the fact that fentanyl is very cheap and it's very potent.
So you don't need a lot of it.
And you can lace things with fentanyl.
So when people are buying like street Xanax or street MDMA, a lot of it is laced.
A lot of it is laced to provide additional effects.
So that it's effective, even though it's watered down and cut down like the cocaine.
You know, they cut it and they add fentanyl to it.
And a lot of people are dying from the fentanyl.
jim gaffigan
That's insane.
joe rogan
It's insane.
I mean...
jim gaffigan
And we lived through the crack era.
joe rogan
Yeah, which is nothing.
jim gaffigan
Where like, crack was like, crack is like, there's the devastating effects of it.
And so...
joe rogan
It's nothing compared to fentanyl.
jim gaffigan
And meth.
We lived through meth.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know, meth's really got to pick up their game.
joe rogan
Well, Adderall took their fucking throne.
Now everyone's on Adderall.
You can get it from a doctor.
jim gaffigan
It's...
Oh, here, let me...
Here's something I wanted to ask.
So, like, energy...
And I could just ask Segura and Bert this, but are they on, like, testosterone?
joe rogan
Bert?
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, definitely.
jim gaffigan
But, you know, like, how is that...
How can I get that?
joe rogan
You can.
You go to a doctor.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
Do you want it?
Well, I don't know.
joe rogan
I'll get you hooked up.
jim gaffigan
I'm not going to murder my family, are you?
unidentified
No.
joe rogan
No, no, no.
jim gaffigan
You didn't murder your family when you were 30, did you?
Then I don't want it.
No, but energy-wise, stamina...
I've never been an energetic person.
I know people are listening like, no.
Jim, you?
He's being humble.
But, yeah, so that would be...
joe rogan
You would have more energy, for sure.
jim gaffigan
I'd have more energy.
joe rogan
Sure.
Your immune system would work better.
Everything would work better.
jim gaffigan
So why isn't everyone just on it?
joe rogan
Well, a lot of people are.
There's a lot more people on testosterone replacement.
jim gaffigan
Besides Sylvester Stallone.
Who else is...
joe rogan
Robert Kennedy Jr. Oh, really?
Yeah, he's on it.
jim gaffigan
So, yeah, he does seem like he's...
joe rogan
He's really fit.
He's impressively fit.
jim gaffigan
He's 69?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah, he works out every day.
Goes to Gold's Gym in Venice.
Works out with jeans on.
jim gaffigan
Is that why he talks like this?
joe rogan
No.
He talks like that because of an illness.
jim gaffigan
Oh, yeah, so I shouldn't make light of it.
joe rogan
Yeah, look at him.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
He's buff!
jim gaffigan
That's crazy.
He's, oh my god!
joe rogan
69 out there doing push-ups and shit with jeans on.
I don't know why the jeans on.
That seems calculated.
Seems like they would get in the way.
jim gaffigan
I think it's a you thing.
joe rogan
Yeah?
Wear the jeans?
jim gaffigan
I would never look at him and think he's 69. He's in great shape.
Right?
joe rogan
But he also takes very good care of himself.
Eats right.
jim gaffigan
How important is the plunge pool?
Or is that just a trend?
Is that Zumba for today?
joe rogan
No, it's real.
It has, without a doubt, it has great physiological and mental benefits.
I do it every day.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
It sucks.
Today was hard.
unidentified
It was hard.
joe rogan
I was up late last night, hanging out at the club, got home, the alarm clock went off, I'm like, fuck.
jim gaffigan
And it's like in a room.
joe rogan
No, it's outside.
Which is nice because it's hot out, so at least I got some sun on my face while my body's freezing.
jim gaffigan
And it is just...
joe rogan
It's hard.
jim gaffigan
And how long are you in there?
joe rogan
Three minutes.
jim gaffigan
But you get out and you're like, this is amazing.
joe rogan
You get out and immediately you get this rush of endorphins, this rush of norepinephrine and dopamine, and it lasts for hours.
They say it's a 200% increase in dopamine that lasts for four to six hours.
jim gaffigan
And it's not just like your body saying, thank you for getting her out of there.
joe rogan
That probably has something to do with it.
It's cold shock proteins.
It's your body responding to this imminent threat of death.
So it produces these anti-inflammatory proteins.
jim gaffigan
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
It's really good for you.
And it's great for your endocrine system.
It increases your testosterone when you do that and then work out.
There's studies that show that.
But it's great for your mental health.
A lot of people that have anxiety and suffer from depression, they've gotten off meds because they've started doing daily cold plunges.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
I would totally be open as long as it wasn't cold.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's a fucking struggle, man.
But it's only three minutes.
The thing is, it's like three minutes passes in normal time so easy.
When you're comfortable right now, like we can go through three minutes and it's nothing.
You just gotta just go through it.
Just go through the three minutes.
It's only three minutes.
It sucks.
But while it sucks, you just deal with it.
You just breathe and deal with it.
And then after three minutes you get out and immediately you feel amazing.
Like, Wow!
Like, if there was a drug that you could take that gives you the feeling that you get right out of the cold plunge, it would be insanely popular.
If there was like a mint that you could pop in your mouth that you get from the fucking gas station, everybody would be taking it.
You know, all these kids are on vape pens because they get a little lightheaded and get a little high.
You would take that pill, the post-cold plunge pill, every day.
You'd feel great.
It would be great for everybody.
But it's not a pill.
It's a fucking arduous, difficult routine.
It sucks.
But it's only three minutes.
It's not that big a deal.
Just get in there.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Say fuck, you know, 360 times.
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
Take a bunch of breaths.
jim gaffigan
And so, yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But then you've got to get an ice maker.
joe rogan
Sauna is great for you, too.
Well, you don't have to get an ice maker.
You get one of these machines that just keeps it cold all the time.
jim gaffigan
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
Yeah, they have these cold plunge machines.
Like, we have one here.
It's called a Blue Cube.
We have one at home.
It's called a Morosco Forge.
And it's 34 degrees.
The water is just above freezing.
You get in there and you just fucking suffer for three minutes and you feel great.
All aches and pains and everything sort of feels better.
jim gaffigan
And so some of it is physical and some of it is, you know, the physical that leads to mental, you know, so you feel, you know, because I'm sure that I speak for you also.
It's like I feel mentally balanced after I do stand-up.
Like it's not just a high.
It's not a low.
It's like if I'm really high before I do a set, I'm kind of even keel if I'm kind of...
Exhausted.
It gives me a boost.
And so when I think about things that are for mental health, and for me it sounds kind of corny, but during the pandemic I started gardening, and it is amazing.
It sounds, and I know I'm You know, people are like, my grandma gardens.
But it is...
I mean, some of it is I wanted to be a farmer, you know, when I was in eighth grade.
But, like, farmers are happy.
Like, there's something about their...
about...
The meditative nature, there's also, you plant something and you come out and there's, sometimes there's a huge amount of peppers.
It's like Christmas morning and sometimes it's a disaster, but it's amazing.
joe rogan
It's a complicated task.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Interesting.
Yeah, it engages you.
jim gaffigan
And it's, and there is something about, because I see the, you know, that the happiest people are farmers and I'm like, That makes perfect sense.
joe rogan
Is that real?
I think so.
The happiest people are farmers?
I would imagine that providing people with food also feels good.
Being a provider and just the whole...
I think there's probably a genetic component to it.
There's a long history of human beings farming.
And so I think there's also built-in human reward systems based on certain behavior that you know leads to success and survival.
And I would imagine that farming is on that list.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, I think it's just amazing.
joe rogan
It's just cool anyway.
unidentified
It is.
joe rogan
You plant some seeds, you see the sprouts grow up.
It's cool.
jim gaffigan
It's amazing.
And all the different plants and what you do to help the plant.
I mean, it's just insane.
joe rogan
And it's a great way to get food.
jim gaffigan
And it encourages you to eat healthier.
Because if you grow something, you're like, we're going to eat this celery.
And it's like, besides that time, I've never eaten celery.
Do you know what I mean?
joe rogan
It's also, you know, there's no pesticides on it.
There's no herbicides.
You're just getting organic vegetables.
jim gaffigan
And then it's like this math puzzle where you sit there and you go, all right, so you did the companion plants and, you know, this deters this pest.
And so all the answers are there.
It's like we just kind of – like I think even like celery as an example, like there's no reason why – You can grow your own celery.
You should never have to buy celery.
If you chop it off and come back, it'll grow back.
So the fact that we go and buy a huge thing of celery is so foreign to...
Our great grandparents.
joe rogan
Right.
jim gaffigan
You would never buy celery.
You could just easily grow it.
joe rogan
My grandparents in New Jersey, my grandfather had a big garden in his backyard.
Most of his backyard was fenced in and he was growing tomato plants and squash and zucchini and all these different things.
And my grandmother always made tomato sauce from the tomatoes from my grandfather's garden and it was amazing.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Just the tomatoes themselves, those New Jersey beefsteak tomatoes, they were all organic, and they were like a fruit.
It was so much different than the pale supermarket tomatoes that last for months on the shelf.
Those things are bastardized.
jim gaffigan
It's crazy.
joe rogan
Like heirloom tomatoes.
That's what a tomato's supposed to be like, those delicious, sweet, succulent tomatoes.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And you're like, this is actually good.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
I could see eating.
It's like even kale.
You know, I have material on kale and I've grown kale and I'm like, all right, you know, this is better than the, you know, because of course the time I had kale 10 or 15 years ago, it was just bitter.
It was probably old kale, you know what I mean, that had bolted or whatever.
Yeah.
joe rogan
Well, kale has a lot of oxalates in it.
So I used to drink kale smoothies every morning, and then I started reading up on kidney stones and problems with oxalates when you eat raw vegetables in high quantities.
There's a lot of people that drink a lot of those veggie shakes in the morning, ground-up vegetables that wind up getting problems with oxalates.
Really?
Yeah, they say it's actually, for some vegetables, it's actually better to cook them.
jim gaffigan
Really?
Yeah.
Isn't celery supposed to decrease inflammation?
joe rogan
Celery is supposed to clean you out.
There's like properties in celery that are supposed to be really good for digestive issues and to clean you out.
Celery juice is great.
It's a good thing in the morning too.
It kind of gets your whole fucking bowel system moving.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And so do you have one cheat day?
Because, you know, we've talked about Italian food.
joe rogan
That's my fucking Italian food and Mexican food.
Those are my vice.
jim gaffigan
And is it once a week?
Or is it...
joe rogan
Yeah, once a week I'll have something.
Every now and again.
We were in the Bronx.
I was in New York a couple weeks ago, and we went to this sandwich shop in the Bronx, G&R Deli.
We had these massive Italian subs.
It was fucking incredible.
And I'm like, when I'm eating that, I'm not thinking at all about health.
It's manja.
It's like hanging out with these wild Italians eating their fucking incredible food.
jim gaffigan
And do you feel the consequences of, you know, eating bread when you don't normally...
joe rogan
Come on, look at that.
unidentified
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
That's the spot.
What I felt like afterwards, yeah, I felt like I ate a brick.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
But it was so good.
You know, I just think there's also pleasure in food that I really enjoy.
And that's one of the things that I really enjoy about Italian food.
I really enjoy about Mexican food.
I just love the pleasure of eating these delicious meals.
And I know they're not good for you.
You know, if I'm eating linguine with clams, I'm under no illusion that I'm eating health food.
jim gaffigan
It is fascinating how different cultures excel at cooking, right?
So, like, the Italians, amazing.
But, like, right above Italy is Austria.
I'm not saying Austria has horrible food.
But, like, you know, I've been to Vienna.
I did a show there.
It's like you get deep-fried, you know, whatever that dish is.
But, like...
Some of it is like the, you know, you go to Mexico, it's like that's the home of, you know, the people of the sun and all those fruits and peppers, and there's a pepper for every kind of state in Mexico.
And some of it is geography, but some of it is just like they really care, right?
And they've taken the time to figure out how to eat good stuff.
joe rogan
Eating good stuff and being together with the family when you all sit around and enjoy a great meal together.
There's a lot to that.
I mean, eating boring, healthy food and just sitting around not enjoying it There's no benefit to that other than health.
But the benefit when you're eating delicious food, you're having a glass of wine and a great lasagna.
It's like, oh, this is enjoyment.
This is like a celebration of life and of pleasure.
There's something to that for sure.
unidentified
It is.
jim gaffigan
I mean, why is, like, so Thailand, the food's amazing.
joe rogan
Amazing, yeah.
jim gaffigan
Amazing.
Like, you never hear someone go, you know what, we gotta get this Laotian food.
I mean, it's right there.
Do you know what I mean?
It's like, but some of that's the influence of, you know, the spices that are probably in Thailand, you know, but I don't know.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's history.
It's a history of great chefs and great cuisine, you know, and there's pride in that history, and it's passed down from generation to generation.
There's that, too.
There's a lot, you know, but the celebration of food and of eating, it's, you know, it's an art form.
Food is an art form, and chefs are artists, and when you have a great meal, you're not just consuming nutrients.
You're also, like, taking in this flavor art.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, so I eat mostly healthy, but if I'm going to go to Los Angeles, and I'm only there for one night, and I have a chance to go to a great Italian restaurant, I'm going to eat.
jim gaffigan
You'll treat yourself.
joe rogan
I'm going to eat.
jim gaffigan
But wait a minute, so if you have some drinks...
During the week or whatever.
But you have the willpower because isn't that the problem is that you make the bad decisions.
It's also when you eat.
joe rogan
And then you keep going.
Then you go out for burgers at 2 o'clock in the morning.
Yeah.
Yeah, you definitely can do that.
The most important thing is like what is the majority of your diet and the majority of your time.
Is the majority of your time spent doing healthy activities and being physically fit and eating right and taking vitamins and doing the sauna, a cold plunge and all this other stuff?
Or is the majority of your time spent eating burgers and cheese and fucking drinking beer and fucking off?
Then you're going to have negative consequences.
I think as long as the absolute majority of your time is spent doing healthy things, then you just enjoy yourself on these ones.
Like The Rock has this cheat day he does, and it's legendary.
He takes photos and videos of it, giant stacks of pancakes, maple syrup.
jim gaffigan
Four chefs.
joe rogan
Huge trays of sushi.
But, you know, obviously you look at him, he's doing something right.
He's very lean, he's very healthy, and he just has one day where he goes off the rails.
And that is like, for him, it's like a mental health break from the rigor of just sheer discipline that he exhibits every day.
You know, getting up in the morning, hours of cardio and weightlifting and all this stuff that he does.
So then the one day he just goes ham.
I think there's nothing wrong with that.
And I think your body can absolutely recover from that.
Your body knows what to do with that.
It just burns through all that shit, and then you're back on the grind the next day.
jim gaffigan
And so when you consider...
So you enjoy being busy, right?
You enjoy...
I mean, you've got a lot of hats, right?
And some of that...
I feel like in some ways I'm very similar.
I love stand-up.
I love acting.
I love doing different things.
Obviously my family is kind of important.
Do you ever have a moment where you look at the mania And that's kind of unfair to characterize it as mania, but the pacing.
So, like, even last night, I was telling my wife, I'm like, yeah, I gotta get up at four so I can get on this flight to go to Austin.
She's like, why do you need to do that?
Why do you need to, like...
And I'm like, because it's a terrific opportunity.
And, you know, some of it is like, you know, I have this new special, and it's like, you know, when we started stand-up...
You know, there was...
It was a different world, but like this...
This process of stand-up is so rewarding, but like, do you ever have a perspective where you're like, what am I doing?
Do you know what I'm saying?
Maybe I'm not making sense.
joe rogan
I know what you're saying.
unidentified
But it's just like, why 10 specials?
jim gaffigan
Why?
Because it's fulfilling.
The work is gratifying in itself.
The journey is the thing that's important.
But is there something of...
Also, you don't want to not take advantage of an opportunity.
And I also know that coming up with a new line or a new topic, even for jokes, is so rewarding and it feeds itself.
But do you ever look at the pace of your life and think, why am I going so hard?
unidentified
Occasionally.
joe rogan
Yeah, but not most of the time.
Most of the time I'm enjoying it.
It is fun.
It's way better to be busy doing something you love than to wish you were busy doing something that you love.
jim gaffigan
Oh, my gosh, yeah.
And also having gone through decades of not having the opportunity to do what you love.
Yeah.
Or doing it under certain parameters.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And, you know, really struggling.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
And not being financially secure.
Not knowing when you will be.
Not knowing if you ever will be.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
And then, you know, getting recognition for it.
Becoming famous for it.
Having a great fan base like you have.
And now you get to tour.
You go, ladies and gentlemen, Jim Gaffigan.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, it's amazing.
joe rogan
And then you get to provide these people with an amazing experience of fun and joy and laughter and they walk out of there and he's talking about that.
They're driving home laughing about it.
It's amazing.
It's an amazing job.
It's an amazing job.
jim gaffigan
It's incredible.
joe rogan
It's the best.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's the best.
And having a club now and being able to do it in town, I do six hours of stand-up a week.
Two shows on Tuesday, two shows on Wednesday, two shows on Thursday.
I do it all the time.
But for me, it's a balance because then on the weekend, I can work if I want to or I can just hang out with my family.
I can be at home.
I can get stuff done.
I can just relax.
Yeah.
I get all the work that I need to do in, but I also...
And podcasting for me is...
I want to say it's easy, but it's the easiest.
It's fun.
You're having conversations with people.
jim gaffigan
You're having conversations, so you're getting the fulfillment.
Because you're talking to friends, you're talking to...
You're talking to peers.
You're talking to people that you're seeing develop their careers in MMA. And then you're also talking to fascinating people that you're curious about.
joe rogan
Yes.
jim gaffigan
I mean, that's what was...
That's how brilliant you've curated this, too.
It's not like, ah, I gotta talk to...
Someone I'm not interested in.
joe rogan
Right.
That's the key, I think, to podcast success.
Only talk to people that you want to talk to.
I book it all myself.
I don't have anyone who tells me who has to be on.
That never happens.
I'm even reluctant when people are like, you should get this person on.
I'm like, now I don't really want to.
jim gaffigan
Well, by the way, that's very common.
There's movies that I want to meet that director, and they'll be like, well, you should find a way, because if an agent proposes someone, that director's not interested in that person.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
jim gaffigan
And I'm like, oh, wow.
joe rogan
When they feel like they're being pushed.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, especially artists.
When they have, like, vision, they have an idea of a thing, and they're trying to put it together in their head and trying to plan it all out, and then someone's like, you should do this.
You should be like, ugh.
That's the last thing I want to do now.
Now you've fucked with my vision.
jim gaffigan
And I think that, you know, that's some of, you know, not getting caught up in other people's expectations is...
And that's like the lesson that I personally have to keep relearning.
Not like from scratch, but it's like, I guess I would call it like a relapse where I'm like, oh, wait a minute, I only did this because they told me to do it and I didn't even want to do this.
Do you know what I mean?
Whereas, you know, when I was in my late 20s, I'd be like, what do I do?
joe rogan
You know what I mean?
jim gaffigan
Should I do that?
Okay, I'll do that, you know?
Yeah.
You know, often when you follow your own path, you know, and you're doing things you really care about, then it's not work.
joe rogan
It's not work.
It's enjoyment.
Yeah, it's just, it's difficult.
Like, you have to work.
You have to do some work.
Like, with stand-up, you have to write.
You have to perform.
You have to really think about it.
You have to edit your act and put it together.
But it's still enjoyable.
It's fun.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I mean, there's a giant percentage of our population that does things they don't want to do all day, every day.
And that's one of the reasons why people drink so much.
They come home and they just want a break.
Like, they just don't want to be there anymore.
They want to change their state.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
They're escaping.
jim gaffigan
Brutal.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I mean, that is the life that a lot of people choose when they choose security.
They choose something like, oh, if I do this, I can make that.
And I do this, then I can buy a house.
And if I do that, I can buy a boat.
I do this, and then I can get that.
And they're all day long watching that clock, wanting to get the fuck out of there.
And then they get out of there, they go home, and they're just, oh, give me a drink.
And the family's complaining, and the wife is pissed because the gardener fucked something up, and you're just like, give me a fucking drink.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
And then you just sit there watching TV and yelling at Fox News.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
And there is something about...
I mean, I don't think we even...
There's probably people that understand this, but, like, this outrage machine...
It serves such a purpose.
And I'm talking about both sides.
Like, you know, fucking Trump.
Fucking Biden.
There is this thing that serves something in us that is probably not healthy.
joe rogan
Definitely not healthy.
jim gaffigan
Right?
And it's certainly not constructive.
Right?
Do you know what I mean?
Like, I feel as though, you know, with comedians, we are so used to being around people of different points of view and different sensibilities that we grow to love that...
It's not completely foreign to...
I remember at 4th of July, I had a friend that was at Occupy Wall Street, and then I had a friend who works at Fox News.
And they were there, and they've known each other for 30 years.
And it was nothing.
It was not an issue.
It was interesting.
I mean, I was asking them questions.
I'm like, alright, so what's going on here?
But...
There is something – maybe it's because comedians are misfits because I say that also and I sometimes think like – sometimes people in the entertainment industry are like, you know, my business is so weird when the reality is, you know, in a bank, in a construction site, there's – People have dramatically different opinions, too, and they gotta go along to get along, right?
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But I don't know.
joe rogan
Well, people like being in opposition of other people, and they like thinking that those people on that other side are keeping them from living the dream.
Or keeping, you know, this country from being great.
Or keeping, you know, people from prospering and keeping democracy alive.
And if we don't defeat them, we're fucked.
And they like having this, like, wild cause.
And there's some validity to it.
I mean, there's a lot of real challenging issues in this country.
Real dangerous, scary issues.
And there's a lot of financial interests that are tied up in these dangerous, scary issues.
And they will avoid solutions because they're profiting off of the problem itself.
There's a lot of that going on.
That's a lot of the homeless problem.
There's a lot of issues in this country that you could pick one side or another and just decide those people are the problem.
It's insanely complicated.
It's insanely interwoven and complex.
And to just reduce it down to the right versus the left and we're the good guys and they're the bad guys, it's like...
That's such a stupid perspective.
And you're being played.
You're being played by the media.
You're being played by politicians.
It's like manufactured outrage, recreational outrage, and it's just a giant distraction.
It's constantly going on.
And then there's UFOs.
jim gaffigan
Why is it that the UFO thing comes up every couple months where people are like, there's UFOs, and then a half hour later people are like, did you see the new Colts uniform?
We're so easily distracted by really unimportant things from stuff that is the theme of every sci-fi movie.
You know, the aliens thing, in the pandemic, they're like, well, here's the aliens info, and people are like, that's unbelievable.
Did you see what Trump said to that female reporter?
You know what I mean?
Like, we are so easily distracted by...
But, I mean, I don't think it's a conspiracy, necessarily.
I think it's just that human beings are just like goldfish.
I think we forget.
unidentified
For sure.
jim gaffigan
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Oh, that's right.
joe rogan
We definitely are, but then there's also people that take advantage of that.
And I think there's definitely calculated news releases and leaks that they put out to distract us from other complicated things that are also going on simultaneously.
The fascinating thing about the UFO thing is because if this had happened in like the 1980s, it would be front page of every newspaper.
Everyone would be talking about it at work.
Everyone would be talking about it on the street.
Like, oh my god.
They had congressional hearings where they said, we've recovered multiple crashed vehicles from other planets.
We have alien biological entities that are in freezers.
That they have right now.
The government has been doing this for 80 years and keeping it secret.
There's a crash retrieval program.
There's a back engineering program.
This is all in the congressional hearings yesterday.
And everybody's like, eh, whatever.
jim gaffigan
But Elon Musk changed it to an ex.
joe rogan
Why is it an ex?
He's a Nazi.
jim gaffigan
Here's what I don't understand.
Like, because you talk to him, you're probably friendly with him, but like, he reminds me of a comedian.
He reminds me of like the comedian that, because there's the comedians where they'll be like, hey, do us a favor, whatever you do, don't bring up that person with the blue shirt.
And the comedian's like, I'm bringing up that person with the blue shirt.
He is that, like, the X thing, and I haven't done a deep dive, I know people are upset about it, and But I'm sitting there, and I know that people are like, but my takeaway is like, oh, he's just doing that for fun, right?
That's just him like, alright, the Russians did a Z on their trucks, what could I do on Twitter that would freak people out?
And that's kind of...
Or is it a distraction?
What he's doing?
Here's my conspiracy.
My conspiracy is Twitter threads.
It's still in development, but Twitter is really struggling, right?
Let's say it's struggling.
joe rogan
Financially, yeah.
jim gaffigan
How do you distract from that?
How do you introduce a new conversation piece?
So if you're going to be like, which comedians, point of view, wouldn't you sit there and go, maybe?
What is the reason for the ex?
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
Well, he has an affinity.
jim gaffigan
Except for us talking about it.
joe rogan
He loves the letter X. Okay.
SpaceX, his kid's name X. I think the original company that he developed with PayPal was X. Like, he's got an affinity for that letter.
For whatever reason.
He's a super nerd.
He made the shape of the rocket different because he likes the movie Spaceballs.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
I mean, that's why he called...
jim gaffigan
No, he put a Tesla in a satellite.
There's that, but then there's also...
The knowledge...
I mean, I have a 17-year-old son who I know says things to push buttons.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
jim gaffigan
And so he's a little bit like, you know, I'm going to do this and it's going to make some people upset.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
In a way, it's part of the outrage machine.
Sure.
It's like, I got to feed the outrage machine.
Yeah.
joe rogan
Well, it's a fun thing for a kid, too, to fuck with you.
Say something to your dad.
jim gaffigan
Feel some power.
unidentified
Yeah.
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Right?
joe rogan
Just put a little push.
Hey, Dad, do you ever think that maybe you're wrong?
Hey, Dad.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Do you ever think that maybe the other side is on the right path and you're the enemy of history?
jim gaffigan
Yes.
Yes.
And, you know, I've got five kids with five different opinions, and it's just...
joe rogan
It's crazy how different their opinions are, isn't it?
jim gaffigan
There is...
joe rogan
Out of the box.
Same house.
jim gaffigan
There is no...
I mean, just one's a social justice warrior, one's like, all right, I got to make sure he doesn't turn into a troll.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
One who's a terrific athlete.
One who's either going to be a fashion designer or a serial killer.
It's just bananas.
But, you know, there is part of me as a comedian, I'm like, you know what?
You don't want the easy life.
Because the easy life, it's hard to come up with material.
You want to live in chaos.
Right?
unidentified
Right?
joe rogan
Well, you know, you want a life with problems that are solvable.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You don't want problems that are insurmountable, like you live in a war-torn country and there's no food.
Those are horrible problems.
But you want problems like, I'm in a difficult occupation, there's a lot of competition, it's fascinating, intellectually challenging, but I have to be on my fucking game.
And I have to get up and I have to put in the work, and the more work I put in, the better the results will be.
That's what you want.
And you want that feeling of satisfaction.
Complex problem solving.
We require things that we have to accomplish and do in order to feel good.
Like we've got some, we've made some headway, made some ground, we made some progress.
We're doing the right thing.
There's like a built-in thing that I think that's from our evolution and our development.
That we had to develop the proper tools and figure out how to hunt and gather and all those different things.
There's a lot to that.
There's a lot to that.
That it's like it's wired into the psychology of being a human being.
The most miserable people I know have nothing to do.
They're bored and lazy and they're sedentary and they distract themselves with drugs and alcohol and whatever and pharmaceuticals and those are the people that are struggling the most because they don't struggle with the thing that they do where there's this thing that they have to be on top of.
They have to be focused and really dedicated to it.
And then you see the results of those, whether you're working in a team, an office that's trying to accomplish a goal, and you get it.
You're like, yeah!
And then everybody can go out and celebrate.
There's a real feeling of accomplishment when you do something.
When you don't do anything, anything at all, I just think people get really depressed.
I think it's really bad for you to not do anything.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
Well, that's also like, you know, that success can kind of cripple people, right?
joe rogan
Right.
You get soft.
unidentified
All right.
jim gaffigan
Let me ask you this.
joe rogan
Okay.
jim gaffigan
What are the chances of Biden and Trump being the nominees?
joe rogan
I think the chance of Trump is very high.
I think the chance of Biden is entirely dependent on whether or not they can do something to turn his health around because it seems like his mental health is deteriorating so rapidly and so publicly that it's a narrative now and it's an inescapable narrative.
He just said they cured cancer the other day.
Did you see that?
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
I mean, I didn't see it.
joe rogan
I mean, he just says things and he doesn't know what he's saying.
He clearly is compromised mentally.
There's something wrong.
jim gaffigan
There is something about the age of everyone.
unidentified
Yes.
jim gaffigan
You probably saw the Mitch McConnell thing.
unidentified
Amazing.
jim gaffigan
Dianne Feinstein, you know.
joe rogan
He just rebooted in front of everybody.
jim gaffigan
And, you know, like the Chuck Grassley.
There is...
And I tried to write about this...
But it's also, like, our perception of it, because part of you is like, okay, Mick Jagger is 80. He's killing it.
He's probably, you know, he's probably got two more wives in him.
You know what I mean?
And then you got...
You got Harrison Ford did Raiders of the Lost Ark.
I saw the movie.
I brought it with my kids.
It's an action movie.
He's still an action star.
Age of 80. Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, kicking ass.
They're in their 80s.
And then...
You sit there and you look at, you know, Nancy Pelosi was 84. Yeah.
You know, Dianne Feinstein.
joe rogan
Well, Feinstein's compromised.
They actually hid that she's compromised.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, and then also, like, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, you know, should have...
Should have left.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Right?
Earlier.
joe rogan
Yeah.
They could have left during the Obama administration and they would have gotten a liberal judge.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
But here's the thing.
joe rogan
My son gets confused in Senate Appropriations hearings and has to be prodded to vote.
Oh, boy.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's not fair.
It's not fair to the constituents.
It's not fair to her.
jim gaffigan
But when I was a kid, I didn't...
You know, the understanding...
You know, I'm in my 50s.
I know I look like I'm 60. You look great.
Oh, thanks.
No, but like...
When I was growing up, people turned 65, they retired, and they either went to Florida or Arizona, and they retired or they got a different kind of job, but they kind of disappeared.
Then they went to the blue plates, they dyed their hair blue, and then they started sending their kids two bucks in a birthday card.
I didn't even know 80-year-olds existed.
I mean, now there's so many 80-year-olds.
Like, there used to be, like, people that were 65 that moved to Florida, and then there was, like, Willard Scott would announce one or two hundred-year-olds.
joe rogan
Right, right.
jim gaffigan
But there was no 80-year-olds.
I mean, the 80-year-olds are everywhere.
unidentified
I think the 80-year-olds are multiplying.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
Well, there's better medicine and health now.
People are way better at nutrition and taking care of themselves.
They have good doctors and they're getting the right supplements.
They can live longer.
People are going to live a lot longer.
I think within our lifetime, we're going to see people that live to be 150 years old.
I think that's a fact.
jim gaffigan
I mean, when we were kids...
Reagan was president.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
He was probably 72 or something like that, and people were like, he's, you know...
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know, it's like he's...
joe rogan
Now he would be a spring chicken.
jim gaffigan
Now, yeah.
Are you kidding?
He would be, like, lifting weights with RFK Jr. Yeah, that's three years old in RFK Jr. Yeah.
joe rogan
Right.
Look at him.
It's 69. That's nuts.
jim gaffigan
It's amazing.
joe rogan
Yeah.
When you see guys like...
Well, Biden is a particularly bad example because he's also had two brain surgeries.
He had a serious brain surgery where they literally remove the top of your skull and deal with aneurysms.
He's got real problems and they know it, but they also know that he's the president of the United States and they can't address that or they'll lose power.
And they also know that he's stated that he wants to run again.
Whether they can talk him out of that, or whether he decides not to do that, or whether the health complications get more severe.
Like, you don't get better when you get 80, and you're in the most insane, high-pressure job.
unidentified
I don't know.
jim gaffigan
Did you see the movie Cocoon?
I mean, they...
But here's the thing.
You know, I think that the Biden thing is, you know, I'm probably on the other side of this, but I view Biden as like...
You know, his foot and mouth disease has disappeared.
So in other words, he used to say stuff, like even when he was with Obama, they would be like, we got to get Biden out of here.
And I don't think he does that.
And some of it is...
joe rogan
What do you mean you don't think he does that?
He does it all the time.
jim gaffigan
Well, I mean, you know, but now they're calling him senior moments.
But like before he used to be like, he would say things and people were like, ixnay on the talking Biden.
joe rogan
Well, when you're a liar and an idiot as a young man— So you're pro-Biden.
jim gaffigan
I'm joking.
joe rogan
Well, he's clearly a liar.
I mean, there's videos of him lying when he was younger about his education record.
jim gaffigan
And, you know, he lifted the coal miner speech from the guy.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Well, we used to do Joe Biden Night at Stitches in Boston in the 80s, because when he was running for president in 1988, he got caught plagiarizing.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, a whole speech.
joe rogan
Not just one.
I think it was more than one.
jim gaffigan
Oh, really?
joe rogan
And also, I think there was some other evidence of plagiarism in his past.
So, we used to do a night at Stitches where, like, you would do my act, I would do your act.
We would go up and do our friend's acts.
jim gaffigan
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It was Joe Biden night.
jim gaffigan
No way.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And this is in 1988. But I don't know.
jim gaffigan
Maybe this...
All right.
This is what I think.
I think that if Trump...
I think that if Trump goes away, I think Biden's going to go, see ya.
You guys take over.
That's what I naively think.
joe rogan
Well, Trump's not going to go away.
I mean, they would have to put him in jail.
And it doesn't seem like they're able to do that.
What are the charges now?
What are the most egregious, most difficult to defend charges?
Because there's the top secret document stuff, but the problem with that is Biden has multiple instances of these top secret documents.
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know, yeah.
joe rogan
Had him in his fucking Corvette in his garage.
unidentified
There's a couple cases according to the Politico website.
joe rogan
Criminal cases.
Definitive guide to the key players and legal risks in the four criminal probes of Donald Trump.
So for 234 years in the nation's history, no American president, former president was indicted.
That changed in March of 2023. Charged with 34 felony counts in connection with hush money payments to a porn star.
See, that one's a weird one.
Because it's like, that's not a big deal.
jim gaffigan
Well, that's, you know...
joe rogan
Hush money payments?
jim gaffigan
I mean, I don't know if our wives would agree.
joe rogan
No, definitely.
It's not, like, morally.
jim gaffigan
No, but it is...
But, yeah, that's like, you know, in the era of JFK, that would be like, how dare you bring that up?
joe rogan
Yeah.
So 37 felony counts for mishandling classified documents and impending investigations.
Now, what I've heard about this is these counts are inflated.
So there's a bunch of counts, but they multiply those accounts based on the amount of documents.
So it becomes all these different counts.
I'm talking on my ass here.
jim gaffigan
I know exactly what I'm saying.
joe rogan
No, I know.
But some of it is like – but that's – So two other ongoing criminal probes, both related to 2020 election interference, those are serious.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, I think the January 6th thing is pretty bad.
joe rogan
Well, the January 6th thing is bad, but also the intelligence agencies were involved in provoking people to go into the Capitol building.
That's a fact.
jim gaffigan
So wait a minute.
You're saying that that guy, what's his name?
joe rogan
Ray Epps.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, you really think that he was- I don't know.
joe rogan
I don't know.
But I do know that every other- I think that's pretty apparent.
jim gaffigan
I think he's going to sue Fox.
joe rogan
I think every other person who was involved in January 6th, who was involved in coordinating a break-in into the Capitol and in instigating people break-in, they were all arrested.
This guy wasn't.
Not only that, they were defending him in the New York Times, the Washington Post, those different things, saying that Fox News has unjustly accused him of instigating.
Well, he clearly instigated.
He did it on camera.
I don't know if he was a Fed.
I know a lot of people think he was a Fed.
The people that were there were calling him a Fed.
What I do know is when they asked the FBI, the FBI said, we can't tell you whether or not there were people that were there, that were doing that.
Now, there's been reports that there's hundreds, I don't know if that's true either.
But I do know that they do use agent provocateurs to disrupt peaceful protests.
It's a common tactic.
What they do is, say if there's a—like the World Trade Organization is a great example.
That was in, I think, the 90s in Seattle.
And so what they did was they were protesting the World Trade Organization.
They were doing it peacefully.
It was a big problem.
So what they did is they sent in, allegedly, agent provocateurs.
They started smashing buildings and lighting things on fire.
Now it's not a peaceful protest.
Now they can bring in the police.
Now they can start arresting people, and then they created a no protest zone, where literally if you had a pin on your jacket that was the WTO with a red line through it, they would not let you cross.
You could not cross with a pin that was against the WTO and go to work.
There was a no protest zone.
So they silenced protest, which is a part of our freedom of speech.
So this is a tactic that some government agencies use to stop peaceful protest.
jim gaffigan
That this event that obviously Trump organized...
Forget about the Giuliani stuff and whether they thought that it was stolen.
joe rogan
He definitely encouraged people to protest.
jim gaffigan
Yes.
But, alright, so you're saying that the FBI and Nancy Pelosi...
joe rogan
I'm not saying Nancy Pelosi.
jim gaffigan
No, but you're saying that they're like, you know...
We'll make this, instead of an awkward protest, we'll encourage it so that it'll backfire on Trump rather than being this rising of people that believe that there was election corruption.
joe rogan
I think it's certainly possible.
jim gaffigan
I think that would be hard.
You think it's possible?
I think it's possible!
joe rogan
Wait a minute.
You think it's hard to do?
jim gaffigan
I think that, you know, that the FBI or the CIA saying, hey, you know, Trump lost this election.
Because here's what you're kind of implying.
Trump lost the election.
He is such an amazing communicator and he's convinced this loyal base that there was election interference.
We don't want them to protest how we can end this Is if we encourage people to go beyond protesting to essentially go into the Capitol and take a shit in the hallway.
I mean I'm exaggerating a little bit.
But like I don't see why that would be – Like, I'm more suspicious why Trump didn't call for backup when, you know, for the Capitol Police.
You know what I mean?
It's like, there was...
And that, like, Michael Flynn's brother was...
You know what I mean?
Like, there's way more conspiracy stuff against...
Trump.
And, you know, then I think the slim likelihood that people were like, oh, Trump's a problem.
Let's just get these people that are loyal to Trump to run into the Capitol so that we can arrest 300 people.
Does that make sense?
joe rogan
No.
No, it doesn't make sense.
No, I think it's a standard tactic, especially when someone is the enemy of the intelligence agencies.
With Trump, that's absolutely the case.
Trump set himself up against the intelligence agencies.
He did it openly, and he did it brazenly.
And a lot of people think it's very dangerous.
Like, the intelligence agencies are very important.
You know, you want to find out what's going on in other countries.
You want to find out what the threats to America are.
You want to find out what terrorist activities are going to be taking place and stop them before...
jim gaffigan
And, you know, JFK had his problem with the intelligence agencies.
joe rogan
Yeah, well, yeah.
I mean, look, it's unchecked power, right?
That's the deep state.
It's unchecked power.
And I think Trump was very open about his disdain for the intelligence agencies.
He created enemies in the intelligence agencies.
It's standard for intelligence agencies in this country to encourage agent provocateurs or to employ agent provocateurs.
jim gaffigan
And so you're saying when he was in Helsinki and he was saying, I believe Putin more than my intelligence community, that was something the intelligence community was like, we're going to get him.
joe rogan
Well, I think they were going to get him in any way that they could because he's an enemy of the intelligence agencies.
And he was openly...
Talking about them being incompetent and being corrupt and he you know he fired Comey and you know he was against the FBI and You know look it's a very dangerous thing you talk to people that are intelligence agencies like it's a very dangerous thing for a president to be at war with the intelligence agencies and to do it so publicly and I think it's Without a doubt,
when you have a gigantic, massive protest that a lot of people think is a threat to democracy, you have these people that are saying the election was rigged and they're on the Capitol lawn, they're screaming and yelling.
I don't think it's outside the realm of possibility that they would encourage people to do things that were unlawful.
Instead of peacefully protesting, which is what everybody was doing on the outside, which is totally legal, to take that and escalate it to entering into the Capitol.
Now you can lock things down, and now you have real clear evidence that this president is responsible for this insurrection attempt, and this is dangerous, this is a threat to our democracy, and He's never gonna be president again.
We're gonna indict him.
We're gonna go after him.
We're gonna do all these different things I think it's not it's not like it's there's a lot of shenanigans going on on both sides It's not like a clear-cut like he shouldn't have done that and they should have done this It's like there's a lot of fuckery and there's a lot that's been going on Throughout history, whenever people have unchecked power and unchecked influence, and they have enemies.
And Trump was their enemy.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, but I just...
And I'm not saying that there isn't, you know, it's kind of like...
joe rogan
Did you see the hearings when they were grilling the FBI as to whether or not they had intelligence agencies there?
jim gaffigan
I probably saw some of it.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's crazy.
Because instead of saying, no, we don't do that, that's illegal, they said we can't answer that.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, but I think even, you know, and again, I'm not saying that there isn't corruption on both sides, but, like, in the end, for me personally, it's like when people complain about Biden's, you know, age or his cognitive decline or whatever, I'm like, the alternative to me is Is not acceptable.
joe rogan
The alternative being Donald Trump.
jim gaffigan
Yes.
joe rogan
And what's least acceptable about that as opposed to Hunter Biden and Joe Biden and all the corruption that we know for sure happened with them?
jim gaffigan
Well, I think, look, you know, Joe Biden's relationship with his son or, you know, who obviously struggles with addiction.
I mean, look, half of our friends struggle with addiction.
It's like...
You know, he's a compassionate father.
Is there some of that, like, some, you know, let's make some money with our influence after we left office or even when we were senator or stuff like that.
Is there some of that?
Yeah.
joe rogan
It seems like there's a lot of that.
jim gaffigan
But compared to Trump, compared to, like, Jared getting a $2 billion contract, compared to, like, You know, like even the documents, like the documents that like Biden had or Pence had versus like Trump literally showing the documents, some of them being of, I think we're going to find out, Being really inconsequential.
I'm not saying he was selling them.
I'm not saying...
I don't know if he was, you know, it was like a big swinging dick move.
I think that's different than, you know, Pence having some documents in his house that he shouldn't have.
But...
joe rogan
You mean Pence or Biden?
jim gaffigan
Pence had documents.
joe rogan
Yeah, but I don't think anybody's really concentrating on Pence.
jim gaffigan
By the way, I do want to make clear that I do have the approach of like, I could find something out and be like, alright.
But like, there is part of me that's like, it's very little doubt in my mind that Trump is the most corrupt and, you know...
You know, was, you know, like just the, you know, it's not, you know, like Andrew Jackson was like, you know, did horrible things, but like, I don't begrudge someone having kind of like kick ass and take no prisoners kind of attitude.
It's not the style, it's just I think that there's repeated corruption.
joe rogan
But there's repeated corruption with the Biden administration.
The corruption with his son, first of all, his son struggling with addiction, that's not my concern.
I mean, it sucks.
It sucks if you have a kid that's hooked on crack and is a fucking complete disaster, and he pulls himself out of it, congratulations for him.
That's not what I... It's the corruption.
It's the clear influence by foreign agents.
jim gaffigan
You don't think Trump has more corruption?
joe rogan
I don't think there's evidence the same way there's evidence right now because of the laptop and because of the recorded conversations.
There's real evidence that they were getting money from other countries.
jim gaffigan
What about Trump University?
joe rogan
I'm not saying that he's clean.
I'm not saying that he's clean.
But I'm saying to dismiss the Biden corruption.
jim gaffigan
But you think that Biden's way more guilty of corruption than Trump.
joe rogan
I'm not saying that.
jim gaffigan
You're saying they're equal.
joe rogan
I'm saying they're both corrupt.
And I'm saying that to say that Biden is like the good, that was like what everybody thought when he got into office.
Finally, the adults are in the room now.
But that's not really true.
And nothing really changed that much once they got in there.
It's not what, it's not like what everybody would like.
There's a good guy and a bad guy.
I think there's two bad guys.
And I think there's corruption that exists in big business and in government that is on a scale that we probably would get violently ill if we found out the actual numbers and what really is going on in terms of influence and how decisions get made and about how certain people become immune to prosecution and certain people become...
jim gaffigan
Jeffrey Epstein.
joe rogan
There's a lot.
There's a lot.
The Epstein thing is fucking nuts.
It's nuts that they put that woman in jail for sex trafficking to no one.
Who are the people?
There's no list.
You have no idea.
There's no disclosure.
But the fact that no one's asking for that and the people that were involved in these crimes have never been brought to justice or even discussed And it's just something that just gets swept under the table.
There's no outcry.
There's no people demanding an investigation to find out what the fuck happened.
There's real clear evidence that he was murdered.
And everyone's trying to say, oh, it was just suicide.
No big deal.
And they're like, oh, the cameras didn't work.
No big deal.
Whatever.
It's over.
Let's not talk about it anymore.
That's nuts.
That's crazy.
There's clear evidence that they did that in front of everybody's face.
They killed that guy.
He knew too much.
jim gaffigan
Who do you think killed him?
As you step right into a library.
joe rogan
Who fucking knows?
Who fucking knows?
I mean, the cameras were off.
Who knows?
They probably sat in an assassin who fucking strangled him.
And then made it look like it was some kind of a suicide attempt.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
Wow.
joe rogan
I mean, it's pretty obvious that that's what they did.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I mean, Michael Badden, the autopsy doctor from the HBO series, he investigated the autopsy and he said the contusions, the ligature marks on his neck were indicative of someone being strangled.
He also said the break of the bones or the type of break that happens when someone's being strangled, not when someone's being hung.
When you're hung, it's your body weight.
That is hanging you, right?
So it's usually on the upper side of your neck because your weight is hanging you down.
But this was down on the bottom of his neck where he's getting fucking strangled by somebody.
And the bones in his neck were broken, which is what happens when you get strangled and doesn't happen when you get hung.
jim gaffigan
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's just, like, physical evidence that shows that he was murdered.
There's also, like, all the circumstantial evidence, like the cameras being off is fucking ridiculous.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, and he was left with—he was on Suicide Watch and he didn't have a roommate and stuff like that.
joe rogan
There's a lot.
There's a lot going on with that.
jim gaffigan
Why do you suppose that— Because there's some situations that can lead to conspiracy, but that one's pretty flat-footed, right?
Where it's obviously dirty.
Why do you think that we do not have, as a society, an appetite for wanting to see...
Clarity around that.
joe rogan
I think it's the same thing why no one's paying attention to the UFO thing.
I think we're inundated with so much information.
There's so much going on.
There's the Ukraine war.
There's climate change.
There's this, there's that.
There's wildfires.
There's fucking pollution in the ocean.
It's like it's constant.
There's always something to be freaked out about.
Oh, people are dropping like flies, and myocarditis, and how much of it is climate change, and how much of it is vaccine injury, and how much of it is this, and then there's new medications that are coming out to deal with this and that, and what are the side effects of those, and there's new corruption here, and new there, and crypto, and financial, and Sam Bankman-Fried's release.
We're just overwhelmed with information.
And I think we're just like, bah!
News cycle is like three seconds.
It's in and out, and then there's a new football player.
jim gaffigan
And then, yeah, there's like, occasionally there's an interesting take on it.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
And then people are like, wow, that was a great article.
So Epstein didn't kill himself.
Anyway, what else?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Well, there's so much debate about the lab leak theory, and that keeps people occupied.
There's so much debate about funding gain-of-function research, whether or not Fauci lied to Congress, which it appears he did.
There's so much.
There's so much to freak out about.
Unless you're one of those people, like you're a climate change guy and you concentrate on one specific thing and that's all you focus on all the time, you're overwhelmed.
You're overwhelmed by constant new threats, constant new distractions and dangers and things to freak out about, and you're overwhelmed with anxiety and existential angst.
It's hard.
We're not designed to deal with the information that comes from 8 billion people.
We're designed to deal with local stuff.
Like, what's going on in my town?
What's happening in the country?
That's the big local.
The big community is the country.
And then the rest of the world is like, what's happening in Argentina?
Like, what's going on in Nicaragua?
But when it's just fucking thrown at you all day long, constantly, the cartels, the borders porous, fentanyl's coming in!
unidentified
It's...
joe rogan
Title 42!
jim gaffigan
Jesus Christ!
joe rogan
You can't get a break unless you disconnect and unless you're off of social media and unless you're not reading the news and just trying to exist with the minimum amount of information coming at you possible.
You're overwhelmed.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You're overwhelmed.
jim gaffigan
I'm totally a news junkie.
joe rogan
Me too.
jim gaffigan
And there is, and it was one of the, because I used to just watch ESPN every night, and then my wife was like, I hate ESPN. So I'm like, alright.
So then we'll watch news.
joe rogan
You have to watch stuff together.
jim gaffigan
And now, she's like, full Dateline, right?
You know, like...
Which is like the history channel for women, right?
And so, but like the news, and I also know that like consuming too much news is not healthy, right?
Because that's some of my outrage machine, right?
And it's understanding different kind of things that don't line up, right?
Yeah.
But I do feel like we almost, you and I both have this same suspicion, but like we're coming from two different sides, which is fascinating.
joe rogan
What side do you think I'm coming from?
jim gaffigan
I think you are more likely to think that Biden is Satan, and I'm more likely to think that Trump is Satan.
joe rogan
I think Biden is a product of a very corrupt business that has been corrupt for a long time.
And he's just not that good at being discreet about it, not that good at covering it.
I also think, you know, when he bragged about getting the prosecutor fired in Ukraine, I think he's just a guy that has a lot of like, I'll fucking show them.
I'll show them.
And it's dumb.
And I think that's why a lot of his stuff gets exposed.
I don't think he's evil incarnate.
I think he's one of those people that is in charge of government and has been in that business, entrenched in that business forever.
I think it's a deeply corrupting business because it's so overwhelmingly corrupted by financial interests and by business and contracts and military industrial complex and the pharmaceutical industrial complex and there's so much influence.
There's so many lobbyists.
There's so much going on.
There's so many deals being brokered.
I think he's a product of that.
I think Trump is a businessman who, for sure, has been involved in some shady shit.
You know, the Trump University thing is a good one.
But he's also a guy that was a Democrat most of his life, and he's also a guy that knows how gross that system is.
And he was a part of it until he became a president.
And then he's an outsider.
jim gaffigan
And I don't think that— He's a master entertainer.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's hilarious, dude.
jim gaffigan
A master at it.
Like, that debate where he brought in Paula Jones after him on the bus for Access Hollywood...
I mean, there's very few people that have walked this earth that would be able to navigate that situation the way he did.
That was...
And some of it's, you know, having ice in your blood.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know what I mean?
joe rogan
And being this larger-than-life character.
jim gaffigan
It's just like, wow, just everyone who watched that, we're like, what did we just see?
What, he's winning now?
unidentified
Yeah.
He was just down by 20 points two seconds ago.
Right.
jim gaffigan
Right.
And so there is—because I think that Trump and Biden will not be the nominees.
I think it's a long way off.
I think that—I do think that, you know, what do I know?
But I'm just—some of it is just kind of like, you know, it's the sport of politics.
But I don't think that— That it's, I think, I think if Trump goes down, I think Biden's like, I'm out.
joe rogan
And so who takes his place?
jim gaffigan
Well, I mean, I don't think he quits, but I think he goes, I'm not, I think then someone's like, we don't need you to run.
I think that's why he's running is because he's the only one that could beat Trump.
joe rogan
Man, I wonder.
jim gaffigan
On the Democratic side.
Well, by the way, it's like – or the Republican side.
None of these Republicans is as well-liked as they are or how well they kind of work the outrage machine.
They can't compete with him.
joe rogan
Well, I think Ron DeSantis is finding that out, that he can't compete with them.
I think he was so successful and so loved as the governor of Florida that pulled everybody through the COVID crisis that he was going to take this no-nonsense, conservative approach and then run the country in a good way, and everyone's going to get back to the way America used to be.
jim gaffigan
He's going to be the strict dad.
joe rogan
Yeah, right.
Right, but it doesn't seem like he can compete against the Trump machine, and people are angry at him now.
Republicans are angry at him now for going against Trump.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
And so that's not a good spot to be in.
You don't want to be on the opposite side of that Trump machine if you're a Republican.
Oh, that poor fuck.
What'd you see, that interview that he did with Tucker Carlson?
He was talking about the demise of the cities in America and all the problems that we have in America, and he said, that's not my concern.
And they're like, you're done.
You just fucked up.
That's it.
No one cares about you now.
He literally killed his campaign with that one conversation with Tucker Carlson.
jim gaffigan
Well, it would have been a miracle for him to...
I mean, I just think as someone...
You know, like in the entertainment industry, you eat a lot of shit.
You know, comedy clubs getting on stage, you know, the owner just being a dick to you.
But, like, Mike Pence, seeing those gallows, his kids were visiting.
He was, like, running.
His life was in danger.
He knew, like, I can't get in that car.
And he's...
joe rogan
What are you talking about?
jim gaffigan
Mike Pence, when they were taking him away from the Capitol, they were like, he refused to get in the car because there was an expectation that the Secret Service was going to take him away from the Capitol so that they couldn't complete what he was supervising on January 6th.
joe rogan
Well, there was people that were looking for him.
They wanted to attack him.
jim gaffigan
There was tons of those.
So essentially Nancy Pelosi and the head of Congress and the Senate, they were taken away from the Capitol.
And Mike Pence, there was a car downstairs and they're like, we're going to take you away.
And he's like, I'm not getting in that car.
Because if he got in that car and they took him to, I don't know, Pennsylvania, then they couldn't complete it.
One of the tactics was not certifying the votes.
That was the tactic.
So that's where he had the self-discipline to go, I'm not getting in that car, I need to certify the votes.
But the fact that he was almost killed and that people were sicked on him and then he's like, you know, I don't know if Trump should be indicted.
That's where I'm kind of like, I've eaten so much shit and I've kissed so much ass, but I have not come close to what Mike Pence is...
That's where ambition was more important than...
Certain self-dignity.
joe rogan
Yeah, I'm not aware of that.
I'm not aware of the facts behind that at all.
But I don't think that anyone's going to vote for him for president.
jim gaffigan
No.
joe rogan
He's just not a presidential guy.
He's not a guy that you think of as a leader.
He just seemed very weird.
jim gaffigan
Well, it's just he was—they put him on the ticket because he was going to get the evangelicals.
joe rogan
Yes.
Right?
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
I mean, I think he is a man of faith, but he's also...
I mean, they're all politicians.
It's like, you know, when you talk about any politician, Barack, you know, Clinton, it's like, people are like, yeah, they're politicians.
I'm like, yeah!
joe rogan
That's what they do.
jim gaffigan
That's what they do.
Do you know what I mean?
It's like...
joe rogan
It's not like encouraging.
jim gaffigan
It's like saying an agent takes 10%.
I'm like, yeah, they're an agent.
They help you get jobs and they get 10%.
joe rogan
That's why they do it.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
joe rogan
That's their job.
jim gaffigan
They want their cut.
joe rogan
Yeah, it helps you.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's a business.
Yeah, that's how it works.
All those things work together.
Yeah.
If you have a bad agent, you think your agent's just taking money and not doing any work, well, then you got an argument.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
But, yeah, I think that...
There's no one that stands out other than RFK. He stands out to me as being very unique.
And who's that gentleman, Vivek, how do you say his last name?
The Indian guy who's running as a Republican.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
The young guy.
Very smart.
Very interesting.
jim gaffigan
Have you had him on the show?
joe rogan
No, I haven't.
I haven't talked to him.
But I'm impressed with his ability to talk about complex situations.
unidentified
Right.
jim gaffigan
Ramaswamy.
Ramaswamy.
joe rogan
Vivek Ramaswamy.
Very very smart guy.
jim gaffigan
He's young.
joe rogan
He's a very young guy.
I mean, how old is he?
37. Yeah, very young.
Like, only two years older than you, like, the cutoff.
Like, it's 35, right?
You can't be younger than 35?
unidentified
I don't know if I want a 37-year-old guy running the country.
joe rogan
Seems a little young.
But he's super intelligent and very interesting.
And he could perhaps be a guy that would bring hope to rational conservatives in the future.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, it's interesting because we are in this age where he's kind of rising above some of that cultural stuff, right?
Or he's intending to.
joe rogan
Yeah, the cultural stuff is fucking crazy.
And it's also, you know, that's exacerbated by social media, too.
And it's also exacerbated by trolls, like people that are hired to stir up shit and hired to get people at each other's throats.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
And we're all being manipulated, all of us, everyone, constantly, all day long.
There's so many pieces of evidence of...
Of interference, where it's not just discourse where people are just discussing things online.
There's people that are hired to take egregious, ridiculous positions and fight against other people and say horrible things and attack people.
They're doing it on purpose.
They're doing it to try to disrupt rational conversation and rational disagreements where people could possibly come to some sort of a reasonable conclusion.
jim gaffigan
Alright, how is the Russian-Ukraine conflict going to end?
Since we are unqualified to talk about all of this.
joe rogan
Yes, let's talk about more things we're unqualified to talk about.
jim gaffigan
What is going to happen?
Besides the end of the world.
joe rogan
The end of the world is the scary one, right?
It's like when the Wagner group was marching towards Russia, I was like, holy shit.
jim gaffigan
I know.
Well, by the way, that guy was, whatever his name is, he's in Russia, and he's like, I thought he'd be dead by now.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
He's like in Russia.
There was like a photograph of him.
And so like...
joe rogan
He's got his own army.
jim gaffigan
I know, but like...
Wild.
I don't know, I just think...
unidentified
There he is?
jim gaffigan
Yeah, he was...
joe rogan
Purgosian?
jim gaffigan
Purgosian, yeah, he was...
There was a photograph of him.
Yeah, right there.
joe rogan
Wow.
Appears on the sidelines of Russia-Africa summer in St. Petersburg.
jim gaffigan
Wow.
joe rogan
Paramilitary Group's founder has continued being seen at events in Russia despite supposedly agreeing exile in Belarus.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah, I mean, there's a power struggle going on there.
And that guy is a billionaire with his own private army, which is wild.
jim gaffigan
You know, he seems like a Simpsons storyline.
joe rogan
Right.
jim gaffigan
Do you know what I mean?
Like, I work for the president, I cater his meals.
Then I pitch.
I run my own army.
Because I think the Wagner Group, essentially in all of Africa, it's the Wagner Group.
It's not even the Russian army.
joe rogan
Really?
jim gaffigan
You know that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like...
Because they did all the stuff in Syria and stuff like that.
So it's this mercenary army, which is, by the way, not that unique.
So when I worked on Peter Pan, you get into the pirate thing, and the British Navy...
The reason they ended up with this great navy is because they hired a bunch of pirates, too.
They were like, hey, we're fighting the French.
You want to work for us?
And they're like, yeah, all right.
You can have some of Jamaica.
Hey, we're fighting Spain.
Do you want to?
And they're like, yeah, all right.
And they're like, all right, you can have some of, you know, we'll make you a lord.
You know what I mean?
It's a very American thing, too.
You see this with billionaires, and I'm not applying this to Musk, but all these billionaires, they achieve incredible success, right?
And you know that they're kind of like squashing other companies.
And then they're kind of like, all right, now I've got to redeem myself.
You know, like Carnegie did it, Getty did it, you know.
joe rogan
Philanthropy.
jim gaffigan
You know, it's like, let's scrub up that perception.
Hey, how about a terrific acting school?
How about the most beautiful building on 50th Street in Manhattan?
How about a museum?
It cleans up some tactics that were probably questionable.
joe rogan
There's definitely a lot of that.
jim gaffigan
Right?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah, so there's a lot of shitty things going on, all simultaneously happening.
And, you know, we're supposed to be the beacon of democracy for the world.
We're supposed to be the greatest example of the experiment of self-government the world has ever known.
And we're being influenced and manipulated left and right constantly.
jim gaffigan
I mean, there's this one group that is pretty...
Jennifer Lawrence does this thing.
It's like some kind of...
I worked with Ed Helms.
And there's this...
It's this nonpartisan group that is all about...
You know, like, for instance, getting rid of gerrymandering, you know, rank choice voting, you know, some of the Andrew Yang stuff.
It's like all this nonpartisan things that conservatives and liberals and moderates essentially all, you know, because essentially what's happening now is that 70% of the American public will want one thing to happen.
And our government officials will not do it because they're so beholden to special interests.
And so it's like we really don't have a representative democracy.
It's pretty scary.
joe rogan
It is scary.
Yeah.
It's money.
You have to take money out of politics.
And how do you do that?
Like imagine trying to go in there and untangle that bag of wires.
jim gaffigan
Right.
Or saying, you know, next presidential election is only going to be six weeks.
And then the TV places are going to be like, but there's commercials.
We make all our money.
You know, it's...
So it's kind of two sides of it.
It's like...
It's also like the pharmaceutical commercials, you know, they're...
I think they're only legal in the U.S. and New Zealand.
joe rogan
Yeah.
New Zealand's far more restrictive than the U.S. too.
jim gaffigan
But if they got rid of them...
You know, alright, I guess we gotta get rid of half our channels.
joe rogan
Well, they probably would, and that probably would be good.
And then it would be the rise of independent news sources and real journalism, which you're seeing more on the internet now than you're seeing in mainstream media.
Independent news sources on the internet are far more reliable in my opinion than what you're seeing on Fox News or on MSNBC. What you get on those is sanctioned propaganda.
And what you get on independent channels is people that don't have a vested interest.
They're not being controlled by corporate interest.
And they have the ability to, whether it's guys like Jimmy Dore or whether it's Breaking Points, they have the ability to talk about things in a complex way and look at them on both sides and find out what the influence is and where the corruption is and talk about it publicly and openly.
And because of that, because these are the only sources that are available now, is independent sources where people are individuals that you can trust because you know they don't lie.
They might have their biases, but they're not being influenced by corporations.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, but I do sit there, and I think the lesson of Fox News is...
I remember when Fox News kind of rose, and they started with the mainstream media kind of language, is that what I learned is, oh, it's impossible for a human being, whether it be Walter Cronkite or Jesse Waters...
To deliver a sentence of news information without kind of having their personality.
It's impossible for it to be completely objective.
Do you know what I mean?
Even the most boring newscaster, it's like, well, now they're downplaying this riot.
You know what I mean?
There was a riot.
Because CNN used to be like that.
It used to be very talky head, right?
And...
But I don't know.
It's weird, because I think it's hard for something to be completely objective.
joe rogan
It's very hard.
It's almost impossible.
Well, one of the things about breaking points with Crystal and Sager is that Sager is conservative and Crystal is liberal.
And the two of them have differing opinions, but respectfully and educated.
And they talk about things from a fact-based perspective.
When has that existed on mainstream news?
You just have crossing points.
There's a few of those shows.
jim gaffigan
The McLaughlin Group.
joe rogan
Yeah, there's a few of those shows where they'd have one dorky conservative or one dorky liberal.
jim gaffigan
But also then they'd have to do the quips, right?
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Crossing.
There's the problem with those shows, too, is that they're very limited in time, right?
So if you have a guest on and you have one segment with that guest, you have seven minutes to discuss the complications of NATO encroaching on Russia and how much of an influence that had on Putin invading Ukraine.
It's complicated.
You'd have to go into the coup, the organized coup that was probably funded by the United States in 2014. You'd have to go into the fact that we've been delivering arms to them.
A lot of shit that you would have to unwrap.
The influence and the amount of time that you would need to do that is hours and hours and probably multiple episodes.
Instead, they have to jam it all into five minutes and then we'll be right back with cute cats.
We'll be right back with, you know, here's a new thing that you should take.
Here's a new study that shows that, you know, obesity could be conquered by this.
jim gaffigan
Are carrots bad for you?
It's always something like...
You're like, I gotta find out if carrots are bad for me.
unidentified
I always had a feeling carrots were bad.
joe rogan
Carrot juice is supposed to be not that great for you.
jim gaffigan
Really?
joe rogan
Yeah, it's supposed to be...
Juice.
That's the problem with...
Carrot juice is very high in sugar.
jim gaffigan
Juice is bad.
joe rogan
It's delicious.
But carrot juice is fucking delicious.
jim gaffigan
Oh, it's amazing.
joe rogan
Like organic carrot juice...
unidentified
And ginger.
joe rogan
Right out of the thing.
unidentified
Ginger.
joe rogan
Oh, it's so lovely.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
What is...
So, like, why...
Given that, like, we know that juice is, like, orange juice.
I like grapefruit juice.
It's so funny.
I do material on something, and then I end up liking it.
Like, I like hiking now, and now I like grapefruit juice.
It's, like, so annoying.
But, like, orange juice and grapefruit juice, tomato juice, it's all...
You're just drinking sugar, right?
So it's, like, why is there, when you go...
To, you know, breakfast.
It's still there.
Do you know what I mean?
And by the way, you know, I like a glass of orange juice.
joe rogan
Well, it's the same reason why pancakes are there.
Pancakes are there because people like them.
jim gaffigan
And the fact that cereal still exists when we know that's the worst thing to feed a child.
joe rogan
Right?
Just sugar and shitty carbohydrates.
jim gaffigan
Right?
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
I always feel like such a hero when I get my kids to eat eggs and bacon and there's no bread or anything.
I'm like, I did it.
They just had protein.
joe rogan
They had healthy fats.
jim gaffigan
And then they go and they just probably eat candy.
joe rogan
Yeah, orange juice.
Like a big 16-ounce glass of orange juice.
That's so alien.
Like there's no other time when you're eating food naturally that you get that kind of a dose of sugar.
Like how much sugar is in...
Let's Google this.
How much sugar is in a 16-ounce glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice?
I bet it's extraordinary.
I bet the amount of oranges you would have to eat to get that sugar.
And again, when you're eating an orange, you're eating it with the pulp and the fiber and it digests more slowly.
It's more natural.
It's normal.
It's the way...
Your body likes fruit because fruit is delicious because it tricks your body into eating it and then you eat the seeds, you shit them out, and then the seeds grow and then plants grow.
That's the whole nature hustle.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That's why fruit's so good for you.
It's filled with vitamins.
unidentified
I got two answers, unfortunately.
jamie vernon
First answer says 16-ounce glasses, 37 grams.
But then right below it, I see 24 grams per 8 ounces.
joe rogan
Oh, so it could be 50, 48. It's a lot.
That's a shit ton of sugar.
jim gaffigan
So, like, if you saw that on the back of...
A can of SpaghettiOs, you'd be like, well, I'm not...
Right.
That's not good.
joe rogan
It's all sugar.
But you would never be that much sugar in a can of SpaghettiOs.
That's a shit ton of sugar.
That's like more...
What is...
Okay.
jim gaffigan
What is it in a Coke?
joe rogan
How much sugar is in a Coca-Cola?
Yeah.
That's about what it is.
It's the same as orange juice.
So your body, other than getting vitamin C, is getting the same kind of sugar dose that you get from a glass of soda.
unidentified
Wow.
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's not good.
It's not good.
It's delicious.
Not bad every now and again.
There's a can of spaghettios.
11 grams in a can of spaghettios.
Wow, that's a lot.
But that's not 48. It's also not 12 ounces.
Yeah, right.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Oh, it's only four ounces?
unidentified
Oh, now it's 15.8 ounces.
joe rogan
Oh, 15 ounces.
Okay.
So yeah, so 11 ounces in the same basic volume.
jim gaffigan
So it's healthier to eat SpaghettiOs than to drink a glass of orange juice.
joe rogan
Isn't that wild?
Isn't that wild?
Well, then you're also getting the sugar from the wheat that's getting processed, the pasta in your body.
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
What about gluten-free pasta?
Because during the pandemic, you were like, get rid of bread and sugar and see what you're doing.
And so when I would cheat and I would have gluten-free pizza, and by the way, you bring that up to an Italian, they're like, we don't do gluten-free pizza.
But if you have gluten-free pizza or gluten-free pasta, is that better or am I just kidding myself?
unidentified
No.
joe rogan
It really depends on what it's made out of.
Now, if you have a gluten sensitivity, like two of my kids have gluten sensitivities.
One of them really has a problem with gluten.
It just gets swollen, so it just feels like shit, like bad stomach aches.
If you do that, yeah, gluten-free pasta is better because they can eat gluten-free pasta and they don't have any problems.
But it's also what's interesting is, and many people talk about this, when you go to Italy and you eat pasta over there, you don't have the same reaction because they don't have the same bread.
They don't have the same wheat.
They have...
They have heirloom wheat.
So their wheat has never been genetically modified.
They have the same wheat they've had for hundreds of years.
So when you eat bread and pasta, it's not the best thing in the world for you, but it does not have the same effect on your body.
I don't have this overwhelming feeling of, like, inflammation and grossness that I have when I eat American pasta.
Because American pasta, what they've done is modified the wheat for higher yield with smaller ground.
jim gaffigan
So you're saying you don't love your country.
joe rogan
That's what I'm saying.
jim gaffigan
No, but it's like, why?
But we could go around so many different things.
And I'm not talking about, you know, in World War II, you know, they had to make cheese slices in a large quantity so that they could give them to all the soldiers.
That's why we have sliced American cheese and stuff like that.
But, like, why does it seem with every food item that America is...
The worst.
By the way, if Americans care about money, it's like you're going to pay at the end.
joe rogan
But not the same people pay.
The same people don't pay at the end.
So it's all money.
It's all money.
There's higher yield.
There's more money.
jim gaffigan
But we're going to have to pay for medical costs.
joe rogan
Right, but they're not paying.
Other people are paying.
So the people that are involved in the industry that makes wheat, makes corn, makes these different things, all they're thinking about is maximizing profits.
So in the pursuit of maximizing profits, they create an item that's worse for your health.
And they don't care.
So it's up to you.
So as long as there's other options, as long as other options are readily available, it's up to you to decide to only eat things that aren't modified and aren't bad for you and aren't filled with pesticides, eating organic, eating healthier stuff.
But if it's a corporation, a corporation's obligation is to their shareholders.
So they have to continue to make more money and they make decisions that would maximize profit.
And in doing so, a lot of times they're making a product that's worse for your health than the original product.
But it lasts on the shelf longer.
You get higher yield for acreage.
And that's what they do.
It's all money.
Now there's certain people that have recognized that and have changed their farms.
Like I had Will Harris from White Oaks Pastures on the podcast.
A fascinating guy.
And he had an industrial farm that his family was running forever.
And over the course of 20 years converted it to a regenerative farm and a natural farm where it's all organic and no pesticides, no herbicides.
When they have a problem with some sort of invasive insect, they bring in another insect that kills those insects.
jim gaffigan
That's not the guy who did Biggest Little Farm documentary.
That's an amazing documentary.
joe rogan
Is that Joel Salatin?
Is Joel Salatin the Biggest Little Farm?
That's a guy from Polyface Farms, who's also a regenerative agricultural expert, who I've also...
jim gaffigan
Because this guy who did this, I think he was like a DP and his wife.
They lived in LA. By the way, it's really fascinating because that's the whole thing of like, okay, you've got a snail problem.
Buy some ducks and let the ducks in there.
Okay, you've got a wolf problem.
Well, don't kill the wolves because if you don't kill the wolves, then you're going to have all these gophers.
You know what I mean?
So it's like...
It's a full circle of life thing on the farm.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Well, the way Will Harris describes it, he's like essentially you're reproducing nature in a controlled environment.
So instead of applying pesticides and herbicides and chemicals and toxins, which leads to horrific runoff.
One of the things that we've showed on this podcast multiple times is they documented how their farm is connected to industrialized farms.
There's an industrialized farm right next to it.
And the river runs through both properties.
But there is a clear line where the runoff from this industrial farm is just this brown pollutants that's going into the river because it's industrial fertilizer.
And on his side, the water's clear.
Because on his side, he doesn't use any of that stuff.
And they have fertile topsoil.
Because during the regenerative farming practices of using manure, the cows only eat grass, and this all creates its own natural fertilizer.
And then you have the pigs, which are roaming and foraging, and you have the chickens that are roaming and foraging.
And then you grow the vegetables with that manure as fertilizer.
And then everything sort of has its place.
And it recreates what a natural environment would be.
It's just contained.
It's just fenced in and many, many, many acres.
And it's all like this recreation of nature, a natural method.
That's what people should eat.
jim gaffigan
The soil is living.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's what we're supposed to be eating.
And, you know, Russia has banned GMO foods.
jim gaffigan
Well, I feel like Europe has done that too, right?
unidentified
They should.
joe rogan
And we should probably do it here.
And then, by the way, genetically modified doesn't necessarily mean bad.
You know, there's been genetic modifications that have led to superior nutrition, and I think that's the case with, I believe it's golden rice, or it's more nutritious, more protein-rich rice, and it led to many more people not dying of famine and starvation.
There's different things that can be done to foods that make them superior.
You know, it's not all negative, but pesticides and herbicides, like on whole, like pretty much, are terrible.
And they're terrible because they're poison.
They kill weeds.
They kill bugs.
jim gaffigan
They're also, you know, and I just know this just from my limited experience in gardening.
It's just the quick fix.
It's not even the fix.
So it's like if you have aphids, you should just get ladybugs.
joe rogan
Right.
But that brings us back to money.
Because what is the cheapest way to do this is going to get the highest yield.
Well, the highest yield is genetically modified organisms, pesticides, and herbicides.
And then you just get massive amounts of crops, monocrop agriculture, which is totally unnatural.
It's totally unnatural to have a thousand acres of just corn growing in a place.
It doesn't happen in the wild.
jim gaffigan
Well, I think it was also the sapiens.
There was something also about farming that, you know, all right, so you could feed a lot of people where we had the corn and we had the potatoes, but all they ate was the potatoes.
They didn't eat anything else, whereas, like, before that, before farming, people would forage, and there was a variety to the diet, and there was more nutrition.
joe rogan
If you had food, you also had a lot of starvation, because sometimes you weren't successful.
And then, you know, they would have climate issues or issues with crops dying, and then you're fucked.
jim gaffigan
Well, by the way, so, like, you're only supposed to have one meal a day, right?
joe rogan
Well, only supposed to.
jim gaffigan
Isn't, like, breakfast the most important meal?
That's all BS. That's all BS. And, like, the food pyramid, that's all kind of, uh, how do we sell some milk?
joe rogan
The food pyramid's definitely horseshit.
Well, the food pyramid's horseshit because the bottom of it is all green.
You know, that's just bullshit.
But that's what they thought at one point in time, that that was like the staple of a good diet.
It's not a conspiracy.
They thought that that was the way to do it, you know?
And they were taught that in school, that that was the way to do it.
They got bad information.
And now we understand that's probably not the way to do it.
And the right way to do it is to eat real food, to eat real organic vegetables, real organic meat and fish.
And then the fish thing, it's like, how much mercury poisoning is in the fish?
How much heavy metal toxins are in the fish?
What kind of environment were these fish growing up in?
If you eat a lot of fish, you can get sick.
There's people that have gotten sick from eating too much sushi.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's just crazy.
jim gaffigan
It's just, and there's just also just so much, there used to be so many fish, and I don't know if you've seen that map of like just the Gulf of Mexico.
joe rogan
It's like brutal.
Oh, it's devastated.
We've, I don't know what the numbers are.
Let's find out.
What percentage of fish have been removed from the ocean over the last 50 years?
Let's find that out.
I bet it's nuts.
jim gaffigan
When I wrote this book about...
I had all these jokes on oysters and how they were...
Because you know that Long Island, Oyster Bay...
It was called Oyster Bay because there were oysters everywhere.
And so when people would come to New York City...
When people would go to Boston, they'd get lobster.
When they'd come to New York City, they'd get clams and oysters.
And now it's like...
But we just gobbled through all the oysters on Long Island.
And I think that like worldwide we've eaten through 90% of the clams and oysters that existed.
Isn't that unbelievable?
joe rogan
It's insane because it happened so quickly.
We think humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years.
And over the last few decades, we ate all the clams.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
Just like all of them.
joe rogan
All the lobster.
jim gaffigan
And also all the fish.
You know, I played this character that worked at a fish refiner.
I didn't realize it.
All the streams, all the lakes, they're just farmed fish.
Because we destroyed the ecosystems in these things, or we gobbled up all the fish, so then we have to put, like, bass into these lakes that, I don't even know if they were there.
joe rogan
2048, no more fish.
jim gaffigan
Oh my god.
joe rogan
The current state of overfishing continues.
The world's oceans will be emptied for fish by 2048. What?
jim gaffigan
Wow.
joe rogan
Is that real?
Oceans are massively overfished.
Only 15% of the world's fisheries are in a relatively good condition.
The remaining 85% are fully or overexploited, depleted, or in a fragile state of recovery from exploitation.
There are no signs of things improving.
The planet's fishing fleet is two to three times larger than what oceans can support.
Wow, 97.4% of Pacific bluefin tuna gone.
Holy shit!
The bluefin tuna are at just 2.6% of its historic population.
Holy fuck!
By 2050, there could be more plastic than fish in the world's ocean, measured by weight.
jim gaffigan
Wow!
Yeah, I mean, it's the fish eating the plastic.
joe rogan
Well, it's also the pollution.
We've had Boyan Slott on the podcast.
He's a young man who created an invention to siphon the plastic out of the water, to filter the plastic out of the water.
And then they take that plastic and make things out of it.
They make like eyeglasses and stuff like that out of it.
It's pretty interesting because he's got this machine that goes over the Pacific garbage patch, that giant fucking enormous size of the state of Texas.
And they just scoop up This plastic, and then they carry it out, and then they take that plastic and convert it into usable goods.
jim gaffigan
I mean, that's where...
I don't understand the American...
unidentified
There it is.
joe rogan
There's this ocean cleanup thing.
So he has this machine that they...
He's a really young guy.
I mean, I think he made this invention when he was 19 years old.
Brilliant, brilliant guy.
We've had him on twice, right?
Yeah.
But salute to him.
So this machine, and they've refined it over the years, they've employed multiple ones of it now, and they're using them to clean up oceans and rivers, and they just scoop up the plastic, and they take that plastic and recycle it.
jim gaffigan
There is a certain cynicism because, like, as somebody who's like, and then we're going to find out, you know, and then that...
What they're doing is they're creating a...
Accidentally creating a monster.
That's...
Because they're...
But, like, there is so much human ingenuity.
I can't figure...
I can't...
I can't understand why...
Because there's also a water shortage.
Why we can't...
You know, the three-fourths of the planet is, or maybe, I don't know, five-eighths or whatever, is water, but it's salt water, right?
So how, and like the water rights thing, it's like we can't figure out how to get the salt out of the water?
joe rogan
Well, we certainly can.
jim gaffigan
But it's too expensive, right?
joe rogan
I don't know.
I don't know why they haven't done that.
I know that California was working on desalination plants, and that was something that was discussed.
I mean, if anybody needs water, it's fucking California.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
I mean, what about Phoenix?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah.
I mean, if they could figure that out, we'd probably drain the water out of the ocean within 50 years.
And they'd be like, there's no more water left in the ocean.
And they'd be like, giant fucking water parks in Kansas.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Interior oceans or, we want to see whales in Nebraska!
And they'd have a fucking whale park.
jim gaffigan
Well, no, some of it is if we could, you know, like, fresh water is so key.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But I guess, do you think that there is something of the environmental crisis that people have an attitude of like, eh, we'll figure it out?
Yeah, we'll figure it out at the end.
joe rogan
I think it's like what we were talking about earlier with so many things to think about.
There's so much going on and there's a few people that concentrate on one issue in particular.
And then for the vast majority of us, there's just this fucking menu of things to freak out about.
jim gaffigan
Right.
joe rogan
And you just get overwhelmed.
And you have your own problems.
And you have your own life.
And you have, you know, a husband or a wife and kids and a mortgage and a job and this and that.
And family problems.
And fucking, you like to play bingo on Friday night.
Whatever the fuck it is.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You got a lot going on.
Like, how much can you really pay attention to?
jim gaffigan
It's just...
joe rogan
Boy, we're a real Debbie Downer on this show, aren't we?
jim gaffigan
No.
Today?
I think it's fascinating.
Somebody's like cleaning their garage.
They're listening to this.
joe rogan
It's definitely fascinating.
It's fascinating that we find ourselves in this very unusual time in human history.
It's a very unusual time where we're overwhelmed by information.
We're overwhelmed by problems, but also overwhelmed by innovation and things seem to be changing.
Insanely rapid pace.
We have more access to information than it's ever been available before.
People know more about more things than they ever have before.
And if you choose to really concentrate on things to enrich your intelligence and your acquiring of information, you could really have a pretty fascinating life today.
But we're also overwhelmed by fear and anxiety and social media and health problems and this and that and poor diet.
Environmental concerns and are we leaving behind a world for our kids?
There's so much.
There's so much to freak out about.
But there's also so much beauty and joy.
There's more art and music and comedy than ever before.
The movie industry is fucked.
They seem to be in a bad situation now.
And now that there's a strike going on with the...
The actors and the writers, it's like, fuck.
That's a bad situation.
But in terms of content, in terms of the amount of things that people produce, the amount of art that people produce, it's unprecedented.
jim gaffigan
Right.
It's the amount of- The variety compared to what we consumed as a child.
unidentified
Incredible.
jim gaffigan
There were Happy Days episodes that didn't make sense.
They didn't make sense and you're like, oh, I guess that's good enough, right?
joe rogan
Yeah.
To jump the shark.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
There was tons that was just absolute garbage and you're like, but you know what?
I love that Henry Winkler.
joe rogan
Well, the standards were far lower.
You ever go back and watch like an old television show today?
They seem so preposterous.
Go watch Leave It to Beaver.
You're like, what the fuck is this?
jim gaffigan
Well, that was fantasy stuff, right?
That was fantasy stuff.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Or just like, my three sons and stuff like that.
That was crazy.
joe rogan
Crazy.
Just no one lived like that.
And to set that standard, the people to aspire to that ridiculous fake life, that's also a problem with media depictions of reality, is that people start comparing themselves, just like kids are getting fucked up by social media, comparing themselves to filters and fake people.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, I mean, 15-year-old boys are looking at porn.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
You know what I mean?
joe rogan
Yeah, it's completely confusing reality.
But media depictions of reality, whether it's through television or movies or songs, it gives people an idea of how their life is supposed to go based on these heroic adventures of these people, based on all these people that are doing the right thing.
And then when you have a movie that's a realistic movie, a movie that realistically explains people in a way that you know to be true, like that movie's gritty.
That's a crazy, dark movie.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
You feel like there's indie movies like Nomadland.
It's like where she lived in a van.
That's rich people.
unidentified
They're like, what would it be like to live in a van?
jim gaffigan
Whereas everyone else who might live in a van...
They want to know what it would be like if they could turn into an ant.
You know what I mean?
They want to watch Ant-Man.
You know what I mean?
So it's just like...
But there's also...
And you touched a little bit on the strike, but there is this ongoing thing for decades we've been hearing about the wealth disparity.
You know what I mean?
It's like...
It goes beyond...
Bernie Sanders bring it up every four years.
It's one of those things.
And by the way, you and I have done well, and we donate all our money.
But the whole thing is, there is something about...
What a CEO made in 1983 versus what a CEO makes in 2023 is pretty ridiculously different.
joe rogan
It is pretty ridiculously different, but again, it goes back to what a corporation is.
If you want someone that's going to run a corporation, and that corporation is going to ruthlessly try to acquire wealth for their shareholders, You want someone who's willing to do a lot of shit to do that.
So you want someone who's gonna get...
They're gonna benefit from that.
They're gonna financially benefit from that in an extraordinary way.
So they're gonna be the most driven, the most psychotic about it, and in turn...
They're going to generate the most wealth for their shareholders.
And because of the way structures are created, these corporate structures, they have an obligation to make more money every year, more money every quarter.
If they don't do that, they'll get kicked out and they'll find someone new.
And by the way, there's no one who's running those giant corporations that's over 65. They get to a certain age, they get rid of them.
All those Fortune 500 companies, you don't see people running CEOs of those companies that are 80 years old.
No, they fucking funnel them out and get some new guys on Adderall.
And that guy goes fucking ham and, you know, funds some fucking Fugazi studies and shows that this product is totally safe and effective and free!
And now the money's flowing in.
And then the politicians are paid off, and they're using the money for advertising for corporate media, and they've got this kind of nice balance going along where they're just racking up numbers.
Ching, ching, ching, ching, ching, ching.
And that's what they do.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, but it's just some of the...
There used to be the board of directors that would be like, hey, can you not pay yourself $50 million?
And I think that now the board of directors is like, so I get $250 for coming to three meetings.
There isn't a certain amount of responsibility.
I think it would have been considered icky for a CEO to pay themselves that.
Do you know what I mean?
Was it?
joe rogan
I'm not aware.
Was it?
jim gaffigan
I don't know!
I don't know.
And by the way, I'm also saying, like, I mean, I have friends that are like, anyone who's made a billion dollars is stolen from someone.
unidentified
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
jim gaffigan
I'm not saying that.
joe rogan
Those people are conveniently always poor.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, you know what I mean?
But I'm saying that, like, there is something about, you know, and that's something that's, you know, there's just, you know, it's also how much...
Does someone need?
And I'm not saying that...
Look, I'm a capitalist.
I totally am.
But I'm just like...
I don't know.
unidentified
Maybe...
joe rogan
Yeah, you're a capitalist, but you're a capitalist artist.
That's the difference.
You're providing something that's greatly beneficial to the people that consume it.
There's a great exchange.
It's a great exchange.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You're creating art.
You're creating comedy.
b-real
You're thinking about things.
joe rogan
You're coming up with unique perspectives.
You're crafting it and editing it to the point where it gets into someone's head, like surprise, sneak punchlines, and pop.
It's a beautiful exchange.
The money that you get is well-earned and deserved, and you're creating joy.
It's a net benefit.
But if you were creating pesticides, you know, if you were creating something that might be killing some kids, but for the most part it's just killing bugs, Yeah.
Yeah, that's when things get sketchy.
And then when you've been making $15, $20 million a year doing that, you're going to keep doing that, especially if you can shield yourself with politicians and laws.
jim gaffigan
And surround yourself with people that are saying, you know what, you made $20 last year, you should make $20 this year.
joe rogan
Not only that, you're funding studies, so you're controlling these scientists that are the ones that are supposed to be coming up with these peer-reviewed studies that show whether something is effective or good or bad.
And that's how fucking glyphosate gets into all of our food supply.
That's how 94% of the population in America tests positive for glyphosate, which is dangerous.
It's a dangerous chemical.
Yeah, and 94% of us have it in our body from food because it's sprayed on everything.
And, you know, they'll say, oh, it's just a minimal amount.
A small amount.
jim gaffigan
Wait a minute.
Was that on the RFK episode?
joe rogan
Well, we might have discussed it on that, but that's something that I read before that.
It's dangerous stuff, man.
Atrazine is what he was talking about, which is another pesticide, which is an endocrine disruptor.
That's the one that Alex Jones said turns the frogs gay.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Because it really does.
It turns the frogs into hermaphrodites.
It causes some frogs to switch genders.
They turn female.
They actually produce viable eggs.
Yeah, it's a weird, creepy chemical.
And then there's also phthalates, which exist in microplastics that all of us have in our body.
There's a direct correlation.
There's a woman named Dr. Shanna Swan from Harvard.
She wrote a book called Countdown.
She's from Harvard, right?
She shows that from the introduction of petrochemical products, plastics in society, there's been a direct correlation between that introduction and a decrease in sperm count, an increase in miscarriages, a decrease in penis and testicle sizes based in Mount Sinai.
Okay.
So this woman's amazing.
She's really fun, too.
She published more than 200 scientific papers and featured in extensive media coverage around the world.
Her appearance is...
She's an environmental and reproductive epidemiologist.
And so her work is all about how these microplastics are affecting children and they're affecting the development of kids in the womb.
So in mammals, when they do studies with mammals, they introduce phthalates into the mammals.
When the mammals are pregnant, the babies of the mammals become affected by this and the reproductive systems are affected.
And we're seeing the direct results of that with human populations as well.
And she's showing through all these studies that people are eating so much microplastic.
You eat like, what is it, a credit card size piece of plastic every week?
Everyone does.
That's what it was, right?
It was a week?
jamie vernon
Yeah, but you remember I found out that they studied, like, some penguin or something like that and found, like, the penguin had a mount, and then they were like, well, that's probably close.
They did some math equation to figure out that's how much humans had.
jim gaffigan
Also, that penguin worked at MasterCard, which is weird.
joe rogan
Penguins are eating cards.
I'm trying to get rich.
jim gaffigan
It is just, like...
There's a lot of bad news.
But I also think that, like, that is one of those things where you can swim in this chaos.
And it can be like, alright, let me just stuff a bunch of fries in my mouth to numb this.
joe rogan
Or you can isolate yourself from that kind of news and meditate and concentrate on positive things and just go take yoga classes and go for hikes and be around all the positive things.
In the world.
Because there's still a lot of that.
Like if you go for a hike in Wyoming and you go through the mountains, it's a beautiful experience.
And you are removed from all the bullshit.
It's like you get to see nature.
You get to see deer and eagles.
This is nice.
This is beautiful.
jim gaffigan
Do you ever feel like...
So there's the greatest generation, right?
And there's the boomers.
But like...
And I'm not bagging on the boomers.
And I'm barely Gen X. But like, do you sit there and go, shit, our generation, are we the ones fucking this up?
joe rogan
Well, some of us are.
Yeah.
I mean, humans are.
jim gaffigan
Well, because there's some of the leadership, right?
Because, like, even, you know, when we use the CEO example, like, there was – I just – you know, I'm sure there was corruption back then.
But, like, there was this greater sense of civics and, you know, like, helping – you know, like, just – The drive during World War II, people were sacrificing things and now it's like, you know, there's a little poison.
People are eating a credit card a week.
Anyway, what's going on?
Do you know what I mean?
Like there is, is there, and I don't want to blame a certain generation, but like, do you sit there and you go, People our age, it's like, we should be stepping up.
And some of it is like, why are these 80-year-olds in charge?
You know, Vivek is, he's 37?
It's like, where's our generation?
joe rogan
Well, yeah, our generation.
Yeah.
Where are they?
Well, they're hiding.
First of all, they don't want to run for president because they have skeletons in their closet.
They don't want their life to be picked apart.
And they don't want lies printed about them, which is also part of the dirty thing of politics.
It's not just things you actually did.
It's like gross distortions of things you did to have the least charitable view of you so that the world, oh, that guy's a monster.
We've got to cut him out.
We've got to put this good guy in.
We don't have a lot of shining choices.
When it comes to politicians, I mean, Obama was a shining choice for a lot of people, but then when he got into power, a lot of the policies were very similar to George Bush's policies, particularly with drone bombings and the protection of whistleblowers.
There's so much that you could point to and say, well, this is not what we wanted.
This is not what we thought we were getting.
And there's no one that really stands out other than the outsiders, other than the RFKs and the Viveks and these people that are just different from the established politicians.
And those people, they're fighting against those people with fucking tooth and claw because they don't want them to get into power and they don't want that kind of change because that change disrupts this business that they're running.
jim gaffigan
But there's part of me that feels like when you talk about RFK Jr. or Vivek, I'm like, they're human.
There are skeletons.
Maybe I don't know about Vivek, but there are human failures.
joe rogan
RFK, he was addicted to heroin.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, no, but there are like...
You know, some of it is not...
I think it's easy for us to characterize, oh, it's the quality of the people that go into politics, but some of it is the occupation.
And the inability for them to even embrace a sense of compromise.
So I think that with Obama, there was...
You know, a lot of people on left and right would say that he compromised too much on things when he had this kind of, you know, particularly the first time he had, like, 60 senators, you know?
But, like, you know, I'm not saying Vivek or any politician.
You're going to be corrupted.
Eventually, you're going to be...
You know, like, Bill Clinton, I think, you know, I'm going to lose everyone, but, like, I think he wasn't a well-intended guy.
You think so?
Well, it's hard to know, right?
joe rogan
First of all, because the media back then was very different than the media today.
You know, I mean, the only thing they caught him on was getting his dick sucked in the White House, which is like, oh!
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Outrageous.
jim gaffigan
Well, he also, like, we knew when he was like, I feel your pain.
I mean, I smelled only bullshit.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
But that's not to say that I didn't think, I mean, Reagan was bullshitting us.
unidentified
Sure.
jim gaffigan
You know what I mean?
Obviously, Nixon was.
joe rogan
Read my lips.
jim gaffigan
Do you know what I mean?
joe rogan
No new taxes.
jim gaffigan
That was bullshit.
And as sincere as Carter was, you're like, you know what, maybe we need someone with a little edge.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
He seemed to be the last of the really sincere guys that ran for president and was president.
Did you ever read Hunter S. Thompson's work on being on the campaign trail with Carter?
jim gaffigan
No.
joe rogan
Hunter went to see Carter speak, and I remember reading about it that he was just not impressed, not interested in going.
I thought it was one more fucking bullshit politician.
And in the middle of the speech, it was so good that he went out and got a tape recorder and brought a tape recorder back to record the rest of it and remembered thinking, like, this guy's quoting Bob Dylan and he's talking about the future of this country in a way that he hadn't heard any politician talk about in a long time.
jim gaffigan
I mean, he's like somebody that walks the walk and talks the talk of these Christian values.
joe rogan
Yes, and still does.
jim gaffigan
Which is like, America's like, loves that stuff.
But after that, we were like, all right, we need a little dirtier than this.
joe rogan
Well, there was the thing with the Iranian hostage crisis, right?
Where they actively made sure that the hostages weren't released until Reagan got into office.
They did that on purpose to show that Reagan was in, you know, that was a better choice.
jim gaffigan
Power.
joe rogan
He's going to get it taken care of.
You know, it's a dirty fucking business.
And when you have that much money involved, it's going to stay dirty.
You're never going to get a completely pure, like, ethical, moral, enlightened structure that's running a capitalist society that is so overwhelmingly influenced by money.
And special interest groups.
It's a matter of mitigating all those things to the maximum amount possible while exposing fraud as much as possible.
And then putting checks and balances in place to make sure that fraud and that corruption can't get to the place where it's at now in the future.
How do you do that?
Well, you have to take money out of politics.
Good fucking luck.
You have to take money out of advertisements in terms of pharmaceutical drug companies being able to advertise on television.
People are vastly over-medicated and not being given the information that a lot of their medical issues could be mitigated by exercise and diet.
A lot of them.
A large percentage of them.
With diet and nutrition and vitamin supplementation and healthy lifestyle.
And meditation and the mitigation of stress, you can do something to make your life far better and you won't need as much medication.
But there's no profit in that.
So they don't say that.
They don't tell you.
jim gaffigan
I agree with you, but is there also something of every generation of humans looks at the previous generation and says, those idiots.
joe rogan
Of course.
jim gaffigan
They were putting leeches on people?
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Come on, we've got to figure it out.
Just take these bag of pills.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Do you know what I mean?
joe rogan
But in some cases, those bag of pills are good for you.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, I know, but we don't have the humility, I think, to admit...
You know, even the COVID coming from the lab...
The lab leak theory.
I think that it wasn't some conspiracy.
It was kind of like we have our narrative and people defend the narrative.
It's not like even one side or the other side.
It's like, look!
joe rogan
What do you mean?
jim gaffigan
meaning like it's a human trait to sit there and go okay well all right so we don't want World War III so it wasn't China it's just like look it's it's a I don't think that's the case with the lab leak theory I I think there's real clear evidence that they knew it was responsible.
And you think that Fauci covered it up because he had given money?
joe rogan
Well, there's emails.
jim gaffigan
There's emails where they're talking about- Did China leak it on purpose?
joe rogan
No, I don't think so.
Well, that lab had safety violations.
The people in the lab got sick.
jim gaffigan
It's a beautiful lab.
joe rogan
Is it?
jim gaffigan
Have you seen the photos?
Yeah, they built it on like an island.
Yeah, they spent a lot of money.
China invests in their infrastructure.
joe rogan
Yeah, well, whatever they were doing, we were partly funding it.
jim gaffigan
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And they were doing gain-of-function research on coronaviruses.
And I think people in that lab got sick, and I think they spread it out to the world.
And I think Fauci covered it up.
And I think there's real clear evidence.
There's real clear evidence in terms of email chain where the original doctors who had the scientists that examined it said it appears to have leaked from a lab.
These appear to be manipulated viruses.
And then they get emails from Fauci, and then within days they change their tune, and then they get funded.
jim gaffigan
But I'm not even disagreeing with that approach.
What I'm saying is that, like, the general resistance...
It doesn't exist right now, the lab leak theory, resistance.
But the general resistance to that is a very human kind of reaction to something.
Where it's like, well, obviously...
It's kind of like the...
And America's hesitation to looking at some of its hard facts about our, you know, this experiment that we've undertaken, which is, you know, understanding, like being able to look yourself in the mirror.
Like, the lab leak theory is...
Is in a way the most logical solution, right?
But also like the, you know, and I'm drawing this comparison.
So like America lived after World War II under this belief system that, hey, we're a country of immigrants.
All these immigrants came over.
We're a melting pot.
Isn't it great?
Anyway, end of story.
Of course, that's not the reality.
The reality is that the wealth of this nation was built off of slavery and about, you know, many, you know, stealing land from Native Americans.
And so, like, there is like a resistance to embracing that knowledge.
So similar to the lab leak theory, whether Fauci caused it or whatever, there is a general tendency to not want to look at a hard fact that might not be comfortable.
joe rogan
Definitely for people that were involved.
Definitely for people that were responsible for it.
And it also makes you feel like you're on the right side of things.
Even if you don't believe in them.
If you can say some facts and some statistics that seem to point to the fact that it probably was some sort of a natural spillover.
Yeah.
I mean, it also eliminates this fucking horrible fear that this could happen again.
You know, that this is a product of this monkeying around with viruses and fucking around with things and making them more contagious for human beings, which is just a dangerous practice that Obama had stopped.
jim gaffigan
And that was...
Some of it was...
Was it to weaponize it or to kind of...
joe rogan
Who knows?
I think there's a lot going on.
There's also just pure financial interests, right?
There's a lot of funding involved.
If you get billions of dollars from organizations to fund this research, and then you have a business involved in funding this research.
Look, if their way of doing that was to come up with some sort of a cure for coronaviruses when they came around, well, they failed fucking miserably at that.
Because the mitigation efforts were very unsuccessful.
They weren't prepared.
They didn't know what to do.
And they likely did create something that was way more contagious and wound up killing a shitload of people because it got out.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's hard for people to think about and deal with.
The fact that the scientific community that was involved in that is responsible for the direct deaths of who knows how many fucking people worldwide.
That's a terrifying thought.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, I mean, that's probably worse than bombing in a comedy club.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
No.
Imagine if you're one of the guys that was involved in that research and you realize that now.
jim gaffigan
Oh my gosh.
joe rogan
Like, holy shit, maybe your mom died of it.
And directly because of stuff that you were working on.
Yeah.
It's terrifying.
jim gaffigan
And people just kind of, well, I think, you know, people kind of sit there and go, well, this is my job.
This is research.
I don't necessarily understand it, but I'm doing this.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And there's also money in the cure.
There's money in the treatment and an insane amount of money that gets pushed around.
That's when people get real crazy and think that it was leaked on purpose so that they can make money off the treatment, which is the most evil way to look at it.
And that scares the shit out of me.
jim gaffigan
Well, it is just amazing.
I mean, but like the advancements we've made, the fact that we're sitting there complaining about all these 80-year-olds running the world is because we've advanced to a point.
joe rogan
Yeah, because hygiene and nutrition and science and medicine has got us to a point where people can live.
jim gaffigan
Eisenhower, you know how old, you know he was bald?
He was 21 years old.
unidentified
He was a general when he was 20. He was a general when he was 12. And he was 21 when he was bald.
jim gaffigan
But he was probably, like, if you found out that Eisenhower was president, he looks like he's 80. How old was Eisenhower when he was president?
Let's find out.
I'm gonna guess 59. Yeah, that's probably about right.
But he looked like he was 70. He looked older.
He looked like Khrushchev.
joe rogan
He was 63. He was 63. Close enough.
jim gaffigan
All right, so that was...
joe rogan
He also had the weight of the world on his shoulders.
jim gaffigan
Right?
joe rogan
Yeah.
I mean, that's the thing about being a president, that when you see a guy like Biden who's already struggling and old, yeah.
That guy looks like he's seen some shit.
jim gaffigan
But he also planned movements in World War II that he knew would kill 200,000 men.
200,000 Americans are going to die.
joe rogan
Just imagine that way.
jim gaffigan
But we've got to get in there.
You know what I mean?
It's like you look at the Korean War.
It's like when they invaded in Busan.
It's like, it was, if you look, I don't know if you can, like, the invasion, where they landed in the Korean War, where the North Koreans had taken over, and, like, there was, like, down here, and then they came in in Pusan.
It was this...
Wild gamble.
We're like, it was just sheer death.
But like D-Day was insane.
joe rogan
Insane.
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Insane.
joe rogan
Storming the beach in Normandy.
Imagine you're one of those guys in that boat.
And you got to get on that beach and just live rounds are like firing straight towards you.
And you got to rush the beach.
jim gaffigan
I mean, Saving Private Ryan.
joe rogan
Fuck, that movie's wild.
jim gaffigan
Think about, like, how that educated an entire generation.
Like, that's one of 50 brilliant things Spielberg's done.
unidentified
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Like, you know, Saving Private Ryan.
Independent of the movie, he educated...
The sacrifice of D-Day to an entire generation.
Or two.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And then people will go after him because he's got a $250 million yacht.
Well, I thought you were about climate change.
You're flying around in a private jet on a giant yacht.
jim gaffigan
You fucking piece of shit.
joe rogan
Yeah, that movie has a rough movie, man.
Yeah, we don't have to see this.
We got it.
Anybody who hasn't seen it should see it.
It's probably one of the most realistic depictions of war.
jim gaffigan
By the way, The Sacrifice, I mean, those World War I guys just...
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
If you haven't seen Alkwright on the Western Front...
joe rogan
I haven't, but everybody tells me I have to see it.
jim gaffigan
It's amazing.
joe rogan
When I'm watching TV, I want to be entertained.
I want to be taken away.
I want to watch Stranger Things or something silly.
I know.
I'm so overwhelmed.
unidentified
I know.
jim gaffigan
My wife's like that.
A lot of women like to...
joe rogan
I'm like a woman?
jim gaffigan
No, I'm joking.
unidentified
I am like a woman.
I'm joking.
jim gaffigan
No, it is like one of those things where you're like, baby just needs to escape.
joe rogan
I need my story.
Most of the time when I get home from the club, I watch professional pool.
jim gaffigan
You do?
joe rogan
Yeah, I watch professional pool matches.
Because there's no weight on the world.
There's no nothing.
There's just skillful manipulation of the ball and moving it around the table.
That's what I like to watch.
jim gaffigan
There's some attractive female pool players, right?
joe rogan
Yeah, there's quite a few.
But that's not why I watch it.
I watch the men.
They play better.
Sorry.
Sorry, ladies.
Some ladies play a lot better than me, but the best players, for some reason, are male.
jim gaffigan
That's so interesting.
So your kids are like, Dad's watching pool.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, they think I'm an idiot.
jim gaffigan
He's watching billiards.
joe rogan
Yeah, I watch pool and I watch funny things.
jim gaffigan
Are there commentaries?
joe rogan
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
jim gaffigan
I think he's going to go for the eight ball.
joe rogan
Shout out to Jeremy Jones, the best.
Yeah, they comment on what's the correct approach, like what path the player should take, what kind of English he has to put on this ball, what are the problem balls that he has to knock out, how he has to maneuver around the table.
jim gaffigan
And so you consume that.
Do you watch the NFL or no?
joe rogan
No.
jim gaffigan
Not at all?
joe rogan
No.
jim gaffigan
I mean, so you're in the MMA thing is that you're like, I got to keep track of that.
That's my passion.
Do you look at other sports like baseball or basketball?
Or do you like, I mean, you appreciate the event if you went to a game, but like...
Is there a certain thing that, like, what's holding you back from that?
joe rogan
Time.
I'm sure I would love football if I really got into it.
It's an amazing game.
I'm sure I'd love basketball.
I'm sure I'd love hockey.
I don't have time.
And I don't play those games.
I'm not that interested.
And I've always been interested in martial arts.
And I think martial arts is the most challenging and dangerous of all the sports.
And I like it the most.
And, you know, there's so much to watch that I have more than enough to consume.
Too much, really.
Like, there's a big event this weekend in Salt Lake City that I'm going to, a big UFC. And are you working at that one?
Yeah, I'm working.
jim gaffigan
And if you're not working at it, you wouldn't go?
joe rogan
No.
I would if I could, if I have time off.
I'd love to go and watch, but I would watch it at home most likely.
But there's certain matches that I'm going to have to watch over the next few days and just get prepped up.
And also, as an analyst, I have to think about what could possibly happen in these fights and what I think the likely scenarios are.
I always call martial arts high-level problem-solving with dire physical consequences.
And it's a very complex, dangerous game that requires intense dedication and focus and discipline.
And it's so hard to do, and you can only do it for so long.
The elite athletes have a nine-year period where they can perform at their very best until their body starts to fail.
jim gaffigan
Wow.
joe rogan
Yeah, so when I watch it, I'm just overwhelmed by that, and I just don't have the time to be watching golf or, you know, baseball.
jim gaffigan
And is there a certain country that is rising out of MMA where you're like, wow, I didn't know that...
I mean, I know jiu-jitsu in Brazil, but, like, is there a certain country where you're like, you know, Russia's kicking ass?
joe rogan
Russia is kicking ass.
A lot of the guys from Dagestan are fucking incredible, but it's...
It's a function of, like, what do they start out training?
They start out training in sambo, which is a Russian martial art, and jiu-jitsu and boxing and wrestling at a very early age.
And they're also encouraged to do it.
There's a lot of competition there.
And it's also a hard life.
It's a hard part of the world, like, dangerous part of the world.
jim gaffigan
So, like, is it parts of Russia that is...
A minority group within the Russian Federation?
Because it wasn't the...
I think there was a Muslim guy that, you know...
joe rogan
Well, there's quite a few Muslim guys.
I think you are...
jim gaffigan
From Russian.
joe rogan
Yeah, there's quite a few.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Khabib Nurmagomedov, who was one of the greatest of all times.
He's a guy from Dagestan who's a Muslim.
A very devout religious guy.
And I think that discipline from being very...
jim gaffigan
Because that's in that chaotic area of Armenia, right?
joe rogan
Right.
Is it Dagestan?
It's in Russia.
jim gaffigan
Or is it near where they had the Winter Olympics and where the Caucasus is?
See, there's Armenia.
Dagestan is right there.
I think that's a war-torn area.
I think that's debated.
Is it Georgia or is it Azerbaijan, right?
joe rogan
Mm-hmm.
Now, is that technically Russia, or is it its own?
It used to be part of the Soviet Union.
jim gaffigan
I think that, like, well, it's...
joe rogan
Dagestan is officially, the Republic of Dagestan is a Republic of Russia situated in the North Caucus of Eastern Europe along the Caspian Sea.
Hard people.
Hard people.
Some of the greatest come out of Dagestan.
And some of the most interesting and exciting prospects come out of that part of the world.
jim gaffigan
So fast.
I mean, Armenia is fast.
joe rogan
Armenia has a ton of great fighters.
jim gaffigan
Well, Armenia, you go to, like, Jerusalem, right?
There's, like, the Jewish quarter, the Muslim quarter.
And then there's the Armenian Quarter.
Like, the Armenians are so fascinating.
Like, they were, like, the first to embrace Christianity and just, like, they were, like, all in.
It's really, I mean, it's just fascinating because, like, they, and then the history of, like, them dealing with the Turks and it's just amazing.
unidentified
Mm-hmm.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And there's been a lot of great Armenian fighters that have fought in MMA. And in kickboxing as well.
jim gaffigan
They're voracious readers too.
They're big readers.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
Anyway, I'm pro-Armenian.
joe rogan
I am too.
I love Armenians.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I just love Armenians in LA. They were refreshingly masculine.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You know, I was just like open about it.
I loved it.
It's because LA is so, you know, for lack of a better term.
I don't want to say feminized because I don't think feminine is negative.
But, you know, there's so many men that are just bitches.
jim gaffigan
No, I remember going to LA during pilot season with my wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, and we had a thing.
Is that guy gay or from LA? Yeah.
And you know, obviously we have tons of friends that are gay, but I was like, I don't know if he's gay or if he's just from LA. You know what I mean?
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah.
Metro.
jim gaffigan
But that was probably like in the 2000s, so I don't know if that's...
joe rogan
It takes all kinds of people to run this crazy world, Jim Gaffman.
jim gaffigan
I love it.
joe rogan
I do too.
We should probably wrap this up.
You're special.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Look at that.
jim gaffigan
Dark pale.
joe rogan
How many have you done now?
jim gaffigan
This is my 10th.
joe rogan
Fuck yeah.
And where'd you film this one?
jim gaffigan
In Tampa.
Nice.
joe rogan
Amazon Prime.
You've done more than one on Amazon Prime.
You like doing it over there?
jim gaffigan
You know, some of it is just where the...
You know, the offer, some of it was the timing that Netflix wanted to do, and then, honestly, you know, Prime offered me more money, but, like, I also think it's good to mix it up.
joe rogan
I think so, too.
jim gaffigan
I mean, I totally learned that out of necessity, but, you know, the landscape is changing so much.
I don't know, and, you know, I was talking to Marin, and he loves, you And so it is good to mix it up.
I mean, I love Netflix.
joe rogan
I think it's good for a guy like you, too, that can go wherever you want.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
joe rogan
So for a guy like you, it's kind of a standard setter.
You can just do whatever you want.
And if you go there, I think it's good for comedy in general.
jim gaffigan
Yeah, and I think it's fascinating to see how big these platforms are.
joe rogan
Well, Amazon, everyone has Amazon on their phone.
jim gaffigan
Anyone who gets a box delivered, they can watch it.
joe rogan
You got Amazon Prime, you can watch it.
It's just a matter of letting people know.
And then when you have great shows like Mrs. Maisel, where people start watching it because of that, and then a terminal list.
Amazon has a lot of great shows now.
jim gaffigan
Yeah.
There's just, again, you were talking about this, there's so much content.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
And sometimes you find out about it later on and you're like, oh, I didn't even realize.
joe rogan
Yeah.
jim gaffigan
And then sometimes the first season's amazing and the second season's garbage.
joe rogan
Yep.
jim gaffigan
Because it's hard.
joe rogan
It's hard.
jim gaffigan
It's really hard.
joe rogan
Yeah, it is.
Listen, we're going to have some fun tonight.
jim gaffigan
Thanks, buddy.
joe rogan
I'm excited that you're going to come to the mothership.
jim gaffigan
I'm very excited.
joe rogan
Yeehaw!
jim gaffigan
I'm excited.
joe rogan
Good to see you, my friend.
unidentified
Thank you.
Thank you.
joe rogan
Always appreciate you.
My pleasure.
unidentified
All right.
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