Gabrielle Reece joins Joe Rogan to discuss her parenting philosophy—letting kids explore passions like horse riding or tennis without external validation—while contrasting it with Laird Hamilton’s disciplined, off-grid Kauai lifestyle and his rapid hip surgery recovery. They explore Hawaii’s isolation-driven extremes (e.g., crystal meth issues) and urban contrasts (like $9 cereal), debating generational struggles with social media objectification and mental health spikes tied to smartphones. Reece critiques combat sports’ forced retirements, citing MMA’s brutal risks vs. surfing’s longevity, and shares Laird Superfood’s accidental origins from ghee-coffee blends, now a performance-driven brand. Ultimately, they frame fitness and self-care as tools for deeper life goals, urging realistic yet joyful aging while rejecting oversimplified narratives. [Automatically generated summary]
two one and we're live hello gabby hello how are you joe good thanks for being here appreciate it thank you for having me you're looking well thank you you are as well i uh i really enjoy following you on instagram you have a very positive instagram page it's full of information it's beneficial it's great stuff thanks i uh You know, I feel like I'm trying to figure that out.
I try to be pretty honest, but sometimes you're always very aware that you just, I'm not interested in getting roasted or spending a lot of time and energy in a hassle with somebody.
So I think when I'm doing it, I'm as honest as I can be, but it's also, I'm aware of that.
I think for me it would just, maybe you'd just be more, even maybe more direct.
But you're, you know, I think When you sort of say, okay, I'm going to occupy this space professionally that feels good to me and I want it to be overall pretty positive.
If you're selling something, maybe I'd like to try to sell something positive, but hopefully towards the honest a little bit.
And sometimes...
When you're doing that, you're also aware that you're not as harsh as sometimes your inner voice is.
And so you go, well, am I not being as completely honest and transparent because I don't really want to deal with it?
One of the things that I've recognized from doing a podcast is that some of the frustration when people do lash out, and you're like, this is out of proportion.
Some of it is due to the fact that it's very frustrating to just not be a part of the conversation if you disagree.
When you're listening to just the fundamental, the act of listening to someone have a conversation, and something comes up, and you're like...
It's harder still if you don't allow them to, if you interject.
We all know that when you have something you're trying to say and someone talks over you, it's fucking frustrating.
And when you're trying to formulate these words and then someone butts in and then you lose it, It's hard.
So that's one of the key skills of learning how to communicate with people that I think a lot of people lose is the ability to listen.
And also you have to have a good enough memory so you can hold on to what you're going to say and then allow this person to elaborate on their thoughts and then when you give them the respect It's just, um...
The only way to find out how someone feels about something is to let them express themselves.
And if people get mad that I don't push back, that's not always the best way to find out how a person feels.
You've got to let them talk.
I want to know the whole thing.
I want to know as far into this as you can tell me why you think this.
Instead of me just saying, no, you're wrong, I want you to explain it to me.
I want to know whether or not I trust your process.
I'm serious, like sometimes, because I even see it with my own husband.
We have three daughters, but I mean, especially, you know, when you have a pretty masculine male, I'm always fascinated to watch them navigate their home when they're surrounded by women.
But if I didn't have this place, though, I don't know if I... Traditionally, men had pool halls they could hang out at or gyms that they would hang out in, and they would get their dose of toxic masculinity.
You know, I think it's nature or God's way of balancing it off.
They say if guys have elevated body temperature, so athletes, people who train a lot, that they statistically have a greater chance of having daughters, because I think they hot, we call it hot balls, basically, if it kills off the male sperm.
I always tell my girlfriends, too, it's unfair also to romanticize Like to your friends who either opted not to have children or whatever, met a partner too late or didn't or whatever.
Because I think it is a really rich...
I mean, there's nothing like it.
I mean, I love my children.
But I had one friend, she was like, got married later, and she's like, you know, we're going to adopt.
And she was also doing a new business and I was like, listen, I need to come.
I want to talk to you.
And she also liked to consider taking naps occasionally.
I was like, if you think you're going to adopt and you're going to have a 12-year-old that's like, hey, I really appreciate you guys.
Thank you so much.
I go, that's not what...
If you think you're going to have a kid and it's going to make you happier, that's not what having a kid is.
I think it makes you...
It makes you know yourself better in a different way, and you can adapt and do something different.
But I think when people sort of sell that bill of goods, like, oh, you've got to have kids.
She had this romantic idea of like, and I go, you know, first of all, you don't know where the kid is coming from, and then also you have a romantic, I think every parent going into it has a romantic idea.
I did, and I'm a pretty realistic person of like, I'm going to do all these things right, and we're going to be running in sunflower fields together, and my kids are never going to think my music sucks or I can't drive.
And then you realize, I had a friend tell me, everyone gets their turn in the barrel.
No matter what you do, you have to navigate stuff.
I think for me it's been a real surrender because I just think – you think you're in control of stuff and you think, oh, I've got some discipline and work ethic.
I can just work my way through it or power my way through it.
And then you realize, like, no, you have to surrender.
And also it's not just about solving it quickly and – Yeah, it is.
I know myself certainly better, but also it forces you, if you're willing to, to really expand.
Well, I've been really fascinated by the life that you guys live in Hawaii.
Because I've always had this idealized, like one day, move to the big island, just chill on the side of a mountain, stop fucking around, fly out to do gigs, but live out there where everything's just more relaxed.
And you're also talking about a warrior culture, right?
Polynesians.
So you have, like, this very intense love and, you know, when they talk about the aloha spirit, generosity, like this, and then they're very powerful people as well.
And sometimes, if they're not living in their most natural way that they were supposed to, and then you couple it with, you know, there's not a ton of opportunities there.
It's hard to live there.
It's far away.
It's expensive.
And sometimes, you know, it sounds cliche, but it's like we really do as human organisms either need to be busy.
So like, okay, working from sunup to sundown for our food, which is how it used to be.
And then you're just so tired, you just go to bed and it's pretty simple and let's just survive it.
Or in the world that we live in now, it's like, how do we get people doing things that are kind of productive?
And you think, oh, I just would sit on the beach and look at the mountain.
And it's like, yeah, and after a while you get bored.
And if you're a warrior, You're either going to go, you know, do something with that that is good for you, or you might not.
So, I think there's a lot of that there.
I've learned a lot from that culture.
But, I mean, they're a pretty powerful group.
Yeah.
You know, it can go the other way pretty quick, where it's, you know, if there's drugs and alcohol or, you know, beefing and, like, it's all that.
Think about when your kids have to stay home for one day.
And now we have all the internet and all this stuff, so now you sort of think, oh, the rest of the world has a perfect, they're all busy and doing fabulous, perfect things.
And it's hard.
You've got to find people that you're like, let's do something.
Let's go.
I mean, can you train alone every single time?
No.
So you'd have to have a tribe of people that are like, let's go do this activity.
Well, you know, just something, that's what I always think is...
Kind of natural is, at least for my experience, is, like, I don't know if you ever go through this when you go home.
Laird will go out and surf for many hours.
Like, he can go out for five hours at a time, if there's surf.
And he comes home, and I see how happy he is, like, to see us.
Like, he loves us.
He's like, oh, my girls, you know?
And then about, I don't know, seven and a half, eight minutes in, And he starts to get this look on his face like, oh yeah, I'm in the house with the family.
I wanted to do a book years ago called Death by Domestication because it's like, how does he manage both of those sides?
I need to go.
I need to be free.
I need to chase things.
Scare myself and do all this stuff and then comes home and is on the floor laying with one of my daughters and being attentive and a great husband and all these things.
But I always get amused a little bit by the push-pull.
Yeah, well, especially I think with the big wave surfer mindset, like a type of person, those are like some of the freest, wildest humans on the planet.
It's a very unusual group of people that rides giant waves of water on the top of the ocean.
I mean, that's a crazy thing to dedicate your time to.
I tried not to think too much about it because I did marry him, but there's some stuff.
And weirdly, he's been doing this so long that you realize he's actually even more different than some of the other guys.
Because if you think about it, he's sustained doing this for, right now, 40 years.
So he's a guy who...
He has both.
So what he wants to do is ride a huge wave during the day and then be with his family at night.
And sometimes, you know, it would take going, you know, halfway around the globe or whatever.
And so I think the pursuit and they have to wait a lot.
That's the other thing.
These things don't come around that often.
It's very interesting to live with because...
There's a little bit of suffering that goes on.
And sometimes Laird will say to me, because he's aware of time going by, he'll be like, you know, I have a lot more waves I need to ride.
And I'm like, I know.
Like, it's a pretty deep calling.
And now that, I mean, he's been foiling for 25 years, but now that they are getting that equipment better, it's sort of like, now we can ride places that we couldn't ride, that were not really attractive for riding on top of the surface of the water, even if you towed it.
So now it's opened up a whole other pursuit for him.
What has changed?
I don't know why you would go towards that, though.
Like, Laird has put me on a ski in front of a wave that's like 60 feet.
And like being on the back of a ski with him driving, there's a moment where you go, okay, I actually, and I'm sure you've experienced this with other friends that take you maybe on a flying or something.
He is, this is what he does, right?
So I'm like, okay, I trust him more than I'm afraid.
That's fine.
I can do that.
And I'm going to surrender to that.
I'm not going to torture myself the whole time.
I'm just going to trust him.
And you turn and there's a six story building behind you moving.
And you just think, how is that fun?
How is saying, I'm going to actively ride that?
But now with the foils, because they're actually catching the energy below the surface of the water, What are the foils?
So imagine if you did something, well you've dedicated yourself to martial arts, but then there's a new way to do it.
And so he's been doing the big stuff for 25 years, but now they're getting the equipment right that he can ride, ways that actually wouldn't be that great, but now they're super fun.
I mean, I know sharks don't have great vision, and I think Laird has hit a turtle, not done anything but grazed it or something, but those animals are pretty smart.
Instead of having to go seek it out and read articles about it and news reports, instead of that, they get to see it in a very digestible form.
You go, oh my god, this is chaos.
This is horrible.
This is an atrocity.
You're taking these incredible animals that are probably some of the most magnificent creatures that evolution has ever created, and you're putting them in a fish tank.
There's a crazy video that I just watched yesterday of one killing a beach seal.
It injured the seal, and the seal tried to make it over, and it literally beached itself, smashed this seal, and there was just blood everywhere, and these bunch of people were standing around watching it going, holy shit.
That she was setting it up, like, showing, like, you can make them slide.
Like, watch this.
Look, slide.
Well, I was listening to my friend Steven Ranella's podcast, and he was talking about the difference in the orcas in the Puget Sound, and that there are local orcas, which are essentially salmon specialists, and they don't eat animals, they don't eat marine mammals, but then there are other ones that travel into the area, and they are marine mammal specialists.
So all they eat is like seals and things along those lines, and they have a totally different...
Most of it is people seeing shadows in the trees and they want to believe it's Bigfoot and they're seeing bears that are walking on two legs.
But if there was a thing, what's really interesting is that's where it would be.
Because if it did come across the bearing land bridge like they believe humans did...
If that did happen, the many animals navigated from there to here that way, that's where Alaska and the Pacific Northwest, that would be the natural path.
And then if you think about how densely wooded that area is, that would be a natural habitat for something that's hiding from people.
The problem is you can't really hide from shit anymore.
Yeah, well, yeah, it's just one sort of step, just a deeper step when you do a little bit intermittent fasting is if you don't start the digestive process, so if you just had, you can have water and caffeine, you can't have fats and things like that.
Yeah.
The theory is that whatever cell dysfunction you have, you kind of can rinse out kind of three times the amount, the process of when you do intermittent fasting.
So it can be a really effective way when you're intermittent fasting to say, okay, I'm going to pick this four-hour window.
For most people, it would probably be between like three and seven or two and six.
And I'm going to eat, and then the rest of the time, I'm not going to.
So it's very close.
It's just sort of one more twist they can put on it.
Well, they say that for people that are in, like, competitive eating competitions, too, that, like, you can still eat fries, because fries are, you don't like fries?
You know, if you have any, like, thing out on the counter that's snackish, like, you have it for the kids, right?
And you have friends that come to visit and say hi, and they're kind of fidgety, and all of a sudden they're just, like, eating everything, and you just look at them like, bro, like, you're in a constant food thing, like, trance, snack it, like, don't have snacky, you know, anything around.
You know, he, you know, he says that everything he does, like his relationships, what he reads, what he eats, what he spends time doing is all to enhance him to perform.
And his, you know, a ton of people like this, his ability to deal with discomfort, he has a very good relationship with discomfort.
Yeah, so that was sort of, I think that's what's interesting about being, when these people go, oh, I'm an athlete.
And then it's like, and some days, I'm sure you feel this way.
way it's like I feel so unathletic or so banged up or you know like I have friends that came into training late and everything all their joints are like all perfect and you know they work perfectly and and Sometimes I've felt a little bit beat up.
Laird's been beat up a lot, but he kind of trains his way out of it big time.
But don't you think, like, when I go to New York City with Laird, he looks there and he looks at the buildings and he's like, why do people do this to themselves?
Like, we've gotten twisted around, like, you're like, Kauai, what a weird place to live.
I mean, you know, they navigated there and they said that the water sea level was lower so that they could see more land when the Polynesians sailed there, but it's a pretty interesting contrast to living in Malibu, let's say.
But then in a way not, because you're surrounded by nature.
It's got to be better for you in terms of like the amount of stress that you experience and the beauty of nature is very calming and soothing and probably therapeutic and beneficial.
It's like, you could have all that at your access, but if you haven't dealt with yourself, or if you feel miserable, it sort of doesn't really matter.
And I think that that kind of place points it out really quick.
Where when you live in a busy place, you can distract yourself from yourself, and you can be like, oh, there's traffic, and I have stuff to do, and I'm busy.
I'm a busy person.
I'm at an office.
I do all this stuff.
And when you're there...
You can't blame really the traffic.
You sort of have to go, oh, that's right.
So it's an interesting thing of when we talk about health or beautiful places and things like that, it still always comes back to yourself.
And like, have I made myself happy?
Am I doing things that make me feel good?
Things like that.
So I think what's really great about that place is that gets clear real quick.
They say that they give more, they volunteer more.
I think the tricky thing for them is going to be connection and being able to be connected and being able to have real conversation and even be able to concentrate long enough to be with somebody.
Like, at least if I had a hard time at school, I could go home and have a reprieve from it at least overnight.
I think for me, that's been a thing with my kids is like...
Especially daughters.
I understand that gaming is different for boys and pornography and things like that and that whole trip of rewiring their brain.
But I think with girls, it's like How do you get them to hear their own voice?
I don't know how they're going to get to a place where they...
It's like this weird mishmash of like, me too, and then never before have people objectified themselves more because they get that positive affirmation.
I always say, if I put out really smart ideas, if I'm a young woman, Oh, I have a thousand followers.
Every shot is of my butt.
I have 10 million followers.
So we have this mixed message going on, which is like...
I'm angry, me too, treat me equal simultaneously to I'm going to objectify myself in the most hardcore way more than in any time in history.
And it's really, for me as a female who understands both those sides a little bit, it kind of trips me out.
Because I don't think, like, those girls, you know, playing that card and no violence should be done to you, and I agree with all of that, and no is no, and all of that.
But at a certain point, you know, like, you've had Jordan Peterson on here many times, it's like, biological signaling, it's like, play a side, at least.
And also...
That one side is super short-lived.
That's what I try to tell my girls.
I'm like, yo, listen.
If you're pretty girls, it's great.
But if that's the card you're playing, your card's done.
By the time you're 30, 35, it's done.
It's over.
Unless you're like 40 and you marry a 70-year-old.
I know, but it's getting them to understand, how do you get a 13-year-old to talk about the long game?
I mean, everything's immediate.
But for me, it's like, culturally, I feel like I'm this weird mix of like the most, I came through at the most modern time, like women went to school and on scholarships and like we, there was no thought to being like strong, not really.
And then, but then weirdly, it's like I feel so kind of old-fashioned when I see kind of this next thing.
Because I'm like, well, strong for me was something else.
Strong was like you were really physically strong, trying to have a strong mind, you know, strong basis of a person.
And then, okay, then there was this other side, like your femininity, your sexuality, all this other stuff.
Are you trying to accurately express how you feel and work it out through communicating with people and figure out how they react to what you're saying and how you feel about how other people say similar things and how it does good things for you and you want to do good things for them?
Well, I guess we'd have to ask men of that generation if, let's say they had two groups of women and one that was like perfectly coiffed with the lip injection.
If you have a great ass and you like working out anyway and you just want to take pictures of it and all of a sudden you have 25 million followers, like, damn.
And so I guess that is the conversation because we always have this thing, this obvious thing of like success is it either is notoriety, it's power, it's money, and then we forget those other communications about like the pursuit of something that really genuinely turns you on.
Well, I think people get short-sighted, and you definitely can get success where you just have money, and you just have objects, and you have notoriety, and people will view it as success.
But if you're not doing what you love, it's not pure success.
It's a different kind of success.
Like, if you really find something that you enjoy doing, and then you take that, like Laird has with surfing, or many people have with their passions, and then you become successful through that, it's a different existence, because it's a pure existence.
When I do stand-up comedy or if I do commentary for the UFC, it's a pure enthusiasm.
And I think that, I guess for me, that's maybe when I see the thing with the girls, and like I said, feeling sensitive to it because I have daughters, or just young people in general, it's that conversation of like, you know, just keeping that definition of success open.
And by the way, this other path...
Taking it like following your own instincts or desires or passions, there's elements to that that are harder, for sure.
It's more unknown.
You can feel insecure, like, is this the right thing to do?
I mean, in our house, we've gone through that 50 different times.
It's like, I'm going to do this because I really want to.
I don't know what's going to happen, and I don't know if it's going to be successful.
I might even lose money.
Who knows?
But that once you start to do it, or you do it once or twice, then you go, oh, but it's so worth trying.
We've pursued 10 businesses and one is really thriving, two are doing well, and the rest, we ate it.
We ate it in cash, we ate it in time, we did.
So I think that's the other thing that's important is like, hey...
It's like sports.
How many times do you lose, too?
You lose a lot in order to win.
And I think that's something that, for me, with my girls, it's like, hey, just try to work really hard and hear your own voice and follow that if you can.
You're also a person who's had that opinion reinforced through vigorous work over the years.
I mean, you're a super successful competitive athlete, which is one of the most difficult things for a person to do, to force your body to perform better than everybody else's, figure a way to win, figure a way to get points scored, figure a way where all these other people who are also high-level athletes are trying to stop you from doing it.
Figure out a way to succeed.
And you're going to fucking fail.
There's no way around it.
You're going to have ups and downs, but you're going to understand the value of pursuit, of dedication and discipline.
There's times, not my youngest and less my oldest, but my middle went through a phase where it was like she was almost like, I'm going to knock her off her...
So I go, okay, Laird was telling me this story years ago.
He went down a river and went down the rapid and got pinned against a rock, okay?
And it was breaking on his back.
And he said he was pushing on the rock and pushing, couldn't get off properly.
Okay?
And he said he had this image of like a skeleton like on the rock, you know, like with the water just pounding on it, you know, like the clothes all messed up.
And he said he moved his foot and wiggled his foot and his whole body slipped out.
And so I said, when I see my youngest daughter, I'm going to wiggle my foot.
Because I keep pushing and prodding and she's just coming.
She's a hydraulic.
It's not stopping.
It's non-ceasing.
She's younger than me.
She has more energy.
She's faster.
And so I go, I'm just going to wiggle my foot.
Literally to the point where even if I need the physical cue.
Like, if she's standing there doing some of her weird bullshit, I'll just be like, move my foot, just to give a trigger.
Like, I've got to trigger myself.
I'm a parent.
I'm, like, against the ropes like everybody else.
And I have a partner who supports me, and sometimes he looks at me like, phew, not that strong of a game, Gab.
And so...
So, you know, we'll get into it and I'll go to pick her up.
And my whole thing is when I talk to my kids in the morning, like first thing I always say, hey, good morning.
Like I try really hard to be the adult and to be the parent, right?
So then I'm like, all right, well, another strategy.
So I go, oh, that's cool.
I can be self-contained.
Like, I'm cool.
I don't need to be like, oh, sweetie.
I don't care.
No problem.
I just click over a little bit into my mail.
Like, okay, if I can drive this car and maybe I'm going to drive a little faster and like, let's go.
And within three minutes, somehow, all the things I said I wasn't going to get lured into, nothing, I'm going to wiggle my foot, all this like philosophical stuff.
I've been reading books.
She gets me.
And she's like 95 pounds.
And she gets me.
She's my only kid that gets me like this.
And it's literally like if you went into a restaurant and you said, okay, I'm not going to order the lasagna and the hamburger and the double fries with the chili sauce.
And you walk in and you go, I'll take the lasagna, the hamburger.
It's like the one thing I said I wasn't going to do.
Parents don't think it's cute to take six-year-olds and think, oh, it's so sweet, we'll get them.
Well, they'll ride horses, because then they fall in love with horses, and then they want better horses, and then they want pretty horse pants, and then the boots.
And then the other thing I've tried is, doesn't it irritate you if you were on a horse and you were more talented as an athlete or you had trained harder but your horse wasn't as good so you couldn't win?
And she just looks at me like, I'm going to ride this out.
She doesn't care.
Nothing impacts her.
Because that's what frustrates me.
Imagine if it was like, I had a better gi than you, so I could kick your ass in, you know, jujitsu.
I have – as much as I used to think I was so in charge of so many things – I think being in a long relationship, I've been with Laird almost 24 years, it's like you start to learn like, oh, okay, I can impact you, I can influence you, I can support you, I can love you, I could try to inspire you, but I'm not here to...
It's like, even as a parent, like, I'm not here to control anyone.
And that's a hard thing, because when you get a little baby, you control it.
You're in charge.
That's what you need to be.
And then all of a sudden, it's like, oh, yeah, no.
And that shift is...
They don't...
I wish...
People need to talk more about, like, the shift of...
So if I have my middle daughter, who's a teenager, not on Kauai, she looks 18 or 19, and there's not a lot to do.
so that's tricky there here like she she basically lives at a tennis house and she goes she's homeschooled and she does five to seven hours of tennis her choice as of in the last couple of months so it's easier because there's just more productive things to do What I like is when they're little, Kauai's great because it's so simple.
The life is simple.
So what kids are thinking about is like playing and being in nature and like developing also a toughness to them that maybe like city kids have it different, you know, because like they're barefoot and they're like climbing trees and they're throwing rocks at each other and it's just like a little more rough and tumble.
So when they're little, Kauai is certainly easier.
And then as they get older, that's where we're sort of at now.
It's like you've got to adapt and put these kids...
Give them a launching pad, if you will.
Because the problem is, like, and I went through this growing up on an island, it's like, you don't know all that's out there to dream to do.
And it's, even if it's, you know, everything in life, it's so true about, like, being, like, the alchemist.
Like, I even see it with Laird.
It's like, he went out into the world, he's done all this stuff, and there's certain things we're doing and projects right back onto Kauai, And so there's always going to be that element probably of I went and I did all these things.
I expressed myself all these ways.
And then there's some basic parts about where I exactly started that are still really important to me.
But I think it's important for kids to see like...
It doesn't matter where you're from or how you grew up.
Like, certainly Laird and I both the same way.
It's like, you really could try to do anything and pursue that if it's in you.
If it's genuinely in you and calling you.
And I want that for my kids.
And I don't care what that is.
But just that they have something that they get up each day and they're like, yo, I'm turned on.
And I think that's what I was talking about, success, is sometimes we have all this, you know, kind of bells and whistles and attention around getting attention.
And I think people don't realize that getting attention, I mean, you know this for yourself, it's like, yeah, it's great, but what is it, like, what is it really, and when you close the doors and you're hanging with your people that you're close to, it's like, You know, what's making you excited for real?
And who loves you for real in that way of like, it's great if people appreciate your work, that always feels good.
But if you're doing it for your real reasons, then I already think that is a real success.
And we spend a lot of time working.
So why not have something that we're fired up on?
And that's the thing, because it's like, you know...
I think that's the other thing is also we get to find like, okay, you were doing this one job and then it's like, okay, but that job is over.
It's like being an athlete or a competing competitive athlete on an organized platform.
That has it a day and a time.
And then when that's over, do you want to...
Look back and keep talking about that?
Or do you want to look and see who you are now and who you'd like to be?
And I think that that's always kind of an important thing to teach people, especially people that have...
Well, I'm a comedian.
I was a professional athlete.
It's like, okay, that's cool.
I had some guy come up to me once and say, hey...
I was at the golf course and one of my kids were hitting golf balls and he goes, weren't you that volleyball player, Gabby?
And I was like, well, no, I'm still Gabby.
But one of the things I've done is play volleyball.
And I think that actually, if we can get to that, that's even better.
It's like...
Who am I? And then off of this, as far as whether you're older or younger or in one part of your career or not, you still can always be the essence of yourself.
And then it's like, oh, and now right now I'm doing this.
But I'm not for all time just a volleyball player.
They identify as being fighters so much that once they retire, almost all of them, except for a small percentage, almost all of them come back because they miss it so much.
They miss the excitement and the thrill, and they don't know who they are without that pursuit.
The pursuit is the next fight.
The pursuit is training camp, getting ready.
And when they don't have that for a long time, it just starts really chipping away at them.
Well, and I think, too, the amount of focus it takes to be really good at that kind of stuff, or to run a company or anything, it makes sense why it's so hard to try to diversify while you're doing that.
It is really hard, but I think it's important to quietly keep that voice inside your head going, yeah, but who are you beyond that expression of yourself?
Who are you?
How do you feel about things?
And also the opportunity to kind of grow up.
There's so many opportunities, like 30, 40, 50, to try to – and I don't mean grow up in the notion of like – You're so responsible now.
I mean, like, grow up in a way that, like, maybe you change your ideas and the way you do things.
And, you know, I was telling Laird I was in this situation this week where Something had gone down and I didn't like the way it had gone down.
It wasn't to do with him.
And I was like, you know what?
I'm not going to attach to this.
I know better.
So now I'm just going to notice that it kind of bugs me and I'm not going to attach all the way to that feeling and to that experience.
And for me, that's more what I mean about growing up, not like, Being, you know, grown up.
Because I actually think the more grown up we are also means we could probably be more childlike, too.
Well, I think ultimately for a person who's experienced athletic highs and the highs of accomplishments but also understands real personal struggle, that's when, like a person like you, you've experienced so many different things that you can understand what's actually beneficial towards you.
Like, how do I get the highest ideas, the biggest ideas, you know, whether it's like dealing with ego or whatever, get the biggest ideas and then get everything else pretty stripped down, pretty simple.
Because otherwise, I feel like you're running around.
Yeah.
I love the days I'm running around and I'm like, what am I reacting to?
What is going on?
I'm like a crazy person.
And then it's like, okay, you got to back it up.
And listen, with kids it's hard because you're only as good as whatever your kids are going through.
And then there's elements of it like they're going through things and you go, it's probably pretty natural.
Even if it's super hard.
It's like, and that's okay, too.
And you don't want that for them, but I think, you know, that's something I've really learned, is like, God, it's a bummer that you have to go through that, and it's hard to watch, and I don't want you to, and that's okay, too, because that's part of...
You'd think in a way Laird and I could be sort of maybe imposing parents in some way, and I'm telling you, they are not, they don't, it doesn't, they look at us like, what do you got?
Like, come on, it's your move.
So I've just learned, like, it's your choice.
Like, this is what I'm serving for dinner.
I don't have pop in the house, obviously.
But if, like, we went someplace, you know, I showed them a picture when they were little.
Remember the guy who did, like, eat this, not that?
Dave with the Z from Men's Healthy Editor.
Anyway, it was like seven or eight chocolate chip cookies and a sun-kissed soda opposite each other.
And I'm like, do you want two cookies or do you want that soda?
And they got it.
It's like, oh, okay.
Because it showed how much sugar was in both.
So it's just that kind of stuff.
But it's not like we live so healthy and they listen.
It's easier than Coca-Cola and Cheetos, though, in a different kind of way.
I'm just saying, like, predator's very straightforward.
It's like, it's a predator.
Don't go out there.
It's like, well, you know, this food, it's in a bag, it's not that good for you, your self-function.
It's like, okay, what?
What do my friends do it?
It's like, you know, predator.
So I just think, I don't know, I just think, I think I've surrendered to the idea of them listening, and I've just tried to show them the best example.
And they are intelligent people that I have faith in will arrive at their own conclusion.
So I think he's always, and I think, you know, listen, when people do things in nature like rock climbers or big wave surfers or whatever, they're more in tune with the fact that like stuff does go wrong.
And so they're not assuming that it's always going to be as it always is.
What are you, like, the ninth largest economy in the world?
Yeah, I told them when we had this whole thing with all the Mexican, you know, the Mexican, you know, whatever, non-illegal, whatever, I said, I have a friend of mine who, he's from here, but he's from Mexico, and I said, you should band together.
You have the ninth largest economy in the world.
And get together and have demands because you're helping run the ninth largest economy in the world.
Yeah, but if you're just an American citizen at fucking Home Depot, you're not supposed to get harassed by some guy who thinks you might be Mexican because you're brown.
Well, if you're really used to that environment, too, where everybody is accountable, and then you see these just assholes beeping and sticking the finger at people.
Well, because it's a fighting, it's a warrior culture.
So, you know, like, uncles slap boys' heads, and it's also now, because of the Brazilian influence coming in, now you've got, you know, jiu-jitsu, and also, think about this, they're pretty strong, right?
And so, contact, they don't mind little contact.
Like, they even joke about, like, Polynesian rugby players, like, Like, it's like, oh, fun.
Some girls are brash and outrageous and they get in other girls' faces and put their knuckles on their nose and they're at the stare down and other girls bow and they hug and they take selfies together.
It's like everyone has their own sort of approach to it.
Fighting intrigues me in that I think it's interesting that you're trying to be offensive and defensive at the same time, dealing with fear, like all these things happening simultaneously.
And I then take it, I look at it one step further with a female because...
I don't know.
I'm interested to know if a female can fight from not a non-emotional place, but without her emotion.
Like, just like, okay, I'm in my male, I'm in my athlete, and I'm not going to be like, oh, she didn't just kick me in the ear, you know, and like freak out, you know what I mean?
Because I think about myself and I'd be like, ugh.
You know, like, I've only been in one fight my whole life, and the girl hit me in the face, and when I saw my blood, I was like, oh, no, she did not just hit me in the face, you know, and then went crazy.
But if these girls could be like, because they're so well trained as an athlete, how that can supersede, like, or override, actually, like, this feminine impulse of, like...
That's a terrible emotion though because you can get completely knocked unconscious doing that.
Happens all the time.
It's just the smart thing to do is to fight with correct technique and with a correct strategy, meaning you have an understanding of how to execute best.
I think it's interesting, though, those sports where there is that.
I mean, listen, versions of it is football.
Living with Laird, obviously, he always says he appreciates Mother Nature because it's like you make good decisions, you're rewarded.
you make bad decisions, you pay a price.
But I think it is very interesting when you have two humans strategically trying to deconstruct one another.
The chess, the physical chess that goes on, like looking at it from another athlete's point of view, I think it's a unique person that wants to put themselves in that situation.
I understand almost like a surfer and a wave and a rock climber and a mountain.
I get that.
I'm going to be a part of that.
But I find it really interesting.
I'm even more curious about women who say, yeah, this is going to be my sport.
Like, there's certain heavyweights and they hit guys and they get knocked unconscious, whether it's Francis Ngannou or Stipe Miocic or these big guys and they slam someone.
I talked to Larry about that because we have tons of friends in organized sports.
So if you have to be drafted or the team has to pick you up or whatever.
And I say to him, how fortunate are you that you're in a sport...
Like other athletes, like a snowboarder or whatever, that you can go.
You can go out.
You want to ride?
You can go ride.
Nobody's dictating to you.
And if you're really smart and you're managing yourself and your health and your well-being and your melon and everything else, you could ride a really long time.
Because I feel like Laird is, like, I, in this way of, like, when you live with somebody that's sort of, you know, it's like, I mean, you have a partner.
It's like, in ways, they're a reference to you, in certain ways.
And so, like, living with him and you're referencing him as an athlete, you're just like, oh, man, I gotta get busy.
I gotta get training.
I gotta get moving.
You know, it's just like, because he's...
He's non-stop, that guy.
Because he has to.
That's a different type.
A lot of times I'll train because I'm like, hey, I know how good I feel when I'm done and it's important and I have other stuff I need to do, but I'm going to get it in.
And for a guy like that, it's just like...
What would it be like if I took an 80-pound dumbbell and sat at the bottom of the pool for a minute and then tried to do 15?
You know, it's just like he also has a creative approach.
I'm more linear.
And it's like for time and for this.
And he's like, let's just go until we can't anymore.
I mean, we started originally, it was like, we'd wear weight vests.
And Laird's like, just go tread as long as you can.
And it's like, okay.
I think I'm good now.
Like, I cannot swim anymore.
You know, I can't tread anymore.
And then, it was actually one of my daughters, she might have been like six or seven at the time, maybe younger, and she would swim to the surface with a dumbbell.
And Laird's like, oh, what if we made, you had reps?
And you do sequencing where you're on an exhale or on an inhale or whatever.
He'll go from like a...
You know, a VersaClimber or a bike and have your heart rate way up and then go, okay, now you're going to do the set.
So it's like there's all these ways to adapt.
It's pretty cool.
I think for people who train, that's the whole thing is how do you keep modifying?
Do you get locked in on your training or do you keep going, okay, I've heard you talk about like, oh, I've added yoga and all these things.
That's the other thing is you get pretty good at something, but now how do you keep kind of adding?
Doing things that you're sort of unsure, you're uncomfortable, you're not good at.
I think that that's always been easier for Laird than me.
I've always sort of been like, well, no, I'm good over here.
I do this good.
It's like, okay, change it up.
So I think that's a thing.
So that has everything.
We do a lot of breathing, heat and ice.
Because his other thing is like active recovery.
People go, oh, I have a day off.
It's like, okay, so what are you going to do to actively recover, not just take the day off?
Or I'm going to do multiple series of heat and ice.
Like some days he'll go and just do three rounds in the sauna and three rounds on the ice.
Or I'm going to do 35 or 45 minutes of breathing, you know, recovery breathing, things like that to really oxygenate the tissue in the cells and things like that.
So I think it's just kind of...
Looking at what a day off looks like and making that something that you participate in supporting the recovery, not just I laid around.
Now, having said that, there are days where after you're done with that, yeah, great, lay around.
Like, go to sleep early, eat extra, more calories, whatever you need to do.
But I think active recovery, even riding a bike, you know, flushing the system, the tissue, things like that.
I think people...
I think off means nothing.
Or for certain athletes, maybe get a massage that day.
Laird uses an oximeter, like if he does breathing, to see if he can get himself up to altitude.
So he'll use that to measure and things like that.
But I think once you do something a really, really long time...
You sort of go, am I on the edge or aren't I? He'll use electronics more for speed and distance.
He'll put it on his boards and be like, okay, we went X miles and the peak speed was, whatever, 50 miles an hour.
So he'll use it more for that to measure distance on how many miles he rode each day on the water, but not necessarily micromanaging electronically all the metrics.
Now, having said that, if you were an athlete where little seconds here and there made a difference, maybe you would.
Yeah, I would think that like things like heart rate variability, finding out if you're recovering correctly, whether or not your heart rate varies in the morning, day to day.
But yeah, that makes a big difference if you're doing something like Michael Phelps or something like that.
I could train for an hour and I could hang out with Brody 13 minutes in the car and she's the victor.
Her foot's on my hip and she's standing in the pose.
And that's one of my many lessons, ongoing lessons, is like...
You cannot go at everything head on.
And I've learned that certainly being in a marriage.
I developed a little bit of finesse.
And as a parent, just kind of going like, I'm here to love you, I'm here to support you, and I'm also going to recognize that you're probably not going to always do it, hardly ever actually, the way I think you should or I want you to.
What happened is Laird, as long as I've known him, he's had coffee come from all around.
He's a coffee freak.
And then what happened is Paul Cech...
I don't know, 16 years ago, gave him ghee in his coffee.
And the two of those animals would be like down in the coffee well, getting all jacked up on caffeine.
And I'd be standing in the gym waiting for them being like, oh, my God, like hanging out with these two, you know, for the next two hours.
Ramped up on fat and coffee, which is basically the Dave Asprey concept of like yak butter tea and, you know, fat and things like that.
So the Bulletproof concept.
So Laird used to start to mess around with elements to add to the caffeine for the performance.
And then we had a guy that we work with, I think for about three years, we'd have guys come over and they'd be like, hey, can you make me one of those coffees?
And after a while, they'd start sending me emails like, well, how much coconut and how much this and how much that did he put in?
And our friend Paul was like, do you mind if I try to put it together in a formula?
And I was like, yeah, whatever.
And it wasn't with the intention of having a business.
And then before you know it, it came out.
And so then we have like original creamer with unsweetened, there's turmeric, there's hydrate products.
You know, it's all based on things that Laird really eats and uses.
And, you know, mushroom blends that I actually put, that's how I do my coffee in the morning is I put that in and do that.
So, you know, that's another good example of like, if you're doing something because you really believe in it and really, and that business has, we're really fortunate.
It's, we have a factory in Sisters, Oregon, and they built another one and Oh, wow.
Yeah, no, it's, we have no, like, they do everything, like, no co-packing partners, we do it, and now we're looking into farming ingredients and doing a drying factory so we can do that and put that into the product and things like that, so...
I don't know.
I think it started from a genuine passion and came into that.
I always say, too, I was playing volleyball in college at 17, and then I started working and was doing other jobs by 18 or 19. But Laird, his path has been really different.
And really, he didn't get...
In surfing, people maybe knew who Laird was.
He was sort of always on the outside.
But then it's really he was like 35 years old when someone from the outside went, oh, that's kind of cool.
So 35 would be considered old, I think, for an athlete.
And I think it's somebody who thought, I have something inside me telling me to go forward.
And I think that I feel that same way.
Like, people said to me, like, well, why did you do this or that?
I go, because I could feel it inside.
It's like, you know that from what you do, because you've done a lot of different things.
And just kind of, not only trying to develop that, but try to trust it.
And say, even though I've...
I don't see it all clearly right now.
I feel it, and I'm going to just keep following that feeling.
And it doesn't always lead to some grand destination, but maybe those lessons and that place lead you to the next, which could be a place that brings you other things.
So, yeah, these businesses are just a natural byproduct of our lifestyle, but it's pretty great.
But if you couple it with ice, you're sort of grateful for the 220. So I would turn it, I'd try to turn it down to like 120. And inevitably, the next day, when it was our real life saunaing, Laird's like, who's been messing with the dial in my sauna?
You know, it's like this whole thing.
And I'm like, well, we were shooting.
We can't sit in there for an hour.
You see people, they're like, can I go out?
And they jump in the pool and then come back in.
It was really fun.
I liked it because there's something like you just get right to it.
Yeah, no, and I get that too, but I think it's just knowing, I think this is important in all things in life, because we like something, not maybe for me because I do really like this, is just because we like something doesn't mean we have to do that too.
Like, I think it's still, like, drilling down on, you know, what do you want to do?
Like, because when I hear you, you go from a comedian to, like, a scientist, a physicist to, you know, it's like, it shows your genuine passions in all these areas.
And that's what's interesting.
I mean, I always want to talk about, like, how do you get it done?
I think so, and I think especially when you've had the opportunity also to do a lot of really cool stuff, I almost think it becomes a responsibility because you're not fighting certain fights.
Like, certain battles, you don't even have, like, I don't have to, I have three jobs, but I chose three jobs.
It's not like you're just trying to survive.
Like, those people, it's like, hey, I get it.
But I feel like if you go like, hey, I got to do that and this and this, it's like, yeah, cool, what are you doing?
This is what my ultimate hope would be, is that somehow, and this is, I think, why I love your show, because I hear it over and over, and you don't say it per se of saying it, but it's there always in an underlying way.
It's like power and love, always.
Be your most badass self all the time that you can.
Have fun, kick ass, and maybe be kind.
For me, those are the ultimate.
Because all the people that I see where I'm like, oh, they could kick your ass and love you.