Feb. 13, 2018 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:50:22
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
|
unidentified
|
3...2... | |
| Jamie with the quick count. | ||
| Jimmy, do her. | ||
| We're live. | ||
| Oh, fantastic. | ||
| Do you use headsets or no? | ||
| Oh, should I wear a headset? | ||
| I wear a headset, sure. | ||
| It's up to you. | ||
| I just feel lonely if I'm the only guy with headsets. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Is that better? | ||
| Oh, I got some. | ||
| I got the practice gear. | ||
| Hey, what time is it? | ||
| It's 1101, one minute after 11. 59 minutes from the top of 12 hours. | ||
| Did you ever do that? | ||
| Did you ever do a regular radio show? | ||
| In college, I had a radio show, but it wasn't real. | ||
| It just broadcast to no one, actually, it turned out. | ||
| To the campus? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Was it just to the campus? | ||
| It was supposed to be going out to the campus, and then we found out about three months in it wasn't going out to anybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I always had dreams of doing a radio show, but I always knew that I would fuck it up. | |
| You know, I'm like, I'd get fired or something. | ||
| And I never thought anybody would hire me, you know. | ||
| I got in trouble at that station for playing the same song three times in a row. | ||
| Because it was so good? | ||
| Yeah, I liked it. | ||
| What was the song? | ||
| I don't even remember. | ||
| It was like some off-brand, I never heard of them, like the Rabini Brothers. | ||
| I was like, that's a fun song. | ||
| They fired you from a college station for that? | ||
| They didn't fire me. | ||
| They came in and they yelled at me. | ||
| And I was like, this isn't even going out to anyone! | ||
| And if it was a nice day, and I had to do my radio shift, I would just come in and simulcast with the FM, because I was on AM, and simulcast with the FM station, because I wanted to go out in the quad. | ||
| I want to sit in that studio. | ||
| It was a nice day. | ||
| I wonder if anybody has done this. | ||
| I mean, I don't think you could do it and put ads on it, but you could do it as just a fun project, have your own radio show on a podcast where you just play songs. | ||
| Could you do that, Jamie? | ||
| No, I think because if you give people a download of a song, that's illegal. | ||
| Oh, right, okay. | ||
| Yeah, that's why, yeah. | ||
| So you could stream it, though, maybe? | ||
| Like, stream it on YouTube? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| Maybe, but not. | ||
| But you'd still have to pay some kind of royalties for those songs. | ||
| I don't know what. | ||
| Even if you weren't making any money off of it, you'd have to pay? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| If someone's streaming your jokes, they have to pay. | ||
| Yeah, but the thing is nobody wants to hear your jokes more than once. | ||
| That's the problem with jokes. | ||
| That's not true, Joe. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Alright, first of all, let me blow smoke up your ass a little bit. | ||
| I'm not actually, it's just sincere. | ||
| So I've seen you do comedy before. | ||
| I saw you, we did the 2004, I think it was the Aspen Festival. | ||
| We were on the opening night show at the Wheeler Opera House. | ||
| And then I saw you do sets at the Improv. | ||
| And I always thought you were funny, you know, but I never remembered any of your jokes. | ||
| And then I saw you at the Comedy Store a couple weeks ago, and I've been doing your act ever since. | ||
| laughter I've been telling your jokes everywhere I go to anybody who will listen, and everybody falls down laughing. | ||
| Those jokes that you have, first of all, the joke about Weinstein is just so goddamn funny. | ||
| And then the joke about the wrestling, goddammit! | ||
| And it's hard for me to not say them right in your face right now. | ||
| I know that would be not good if I did your jokes right to you. | ||
| But I can't not do... | ||
| Those are some of the funniest jokes I've heard in a long time. | ||
| And I know people are going to be saying, oh, he's such a kiss-ass. | ||
| I'm not kidding. | ||
| I love comedy, and I love jokes, and I can remember jokes that I like. | ||
| And... | ||
| That's so goddamn funny! | ||
| I'm in a rush to get that onto a Netflix special because I'm worried it's gonna get old. | ||
| Yeah, right. | ||
| Because right now, you know, it's like it happened a couple of months ago, it's still okay, and I'm recording in April, and I'm like, boy, April is like the wire. | ||
| That's like under the wire. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think it'll be okay because there's not gonna be a bigger... | ||
| Raper or whatever, then Harvey Weinstein could come. | ||
| He's the pinnacle, right? | ||
| Right, like if you had a Cosby joke today, it's still okay. | ||
| Because he's such a raper. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| I forgot Cosby. | ||
| How did you forget? | ||
| Did you see the recent shit where Cosby was at a barbershop? | ||
| There's videos of him hanging out at the barbershop talking about jazz trivia with all the barbershop guys in Philly. | ||
| No. | ||
| Yeah, he actually performed recently at a jazz club. | ||
| Yeah, he showed up at this jazz club and performed and then announced that he was going to perform at another place. | ||
| He's like, he's back. | ||
| While he's in between trials. | ||
| Wow! | ||
| So, see, that's the weird thing. | ||
| I always wondered, like, he was still selling tickets. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Like, people will still show up to see him. | ||
| Well, before anyone knew for sure what was going on, there was a couple of accusations and everybody was like, what is this? | ||
| Like, what is this really? | ||
| Is this real? | ||
| Is this someone doing a shakedown? | ||
| And then they started, just the fucking tsunami of accusations started piling in, which is really incredible when you think about how many years that guy was doing that. | ||
| It's unbelievable how he could get away with that for so long. | ||
| It's terrifying. | ||
| And then something, and then now it's like you just go on a bad date and you get into trouble. | ||
| Like Aziz Ansari? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| That's horrible, right? | ||
| Well, the pendulum swings. | ||
| I think it's kind of open season on men right now. | ||
| And it'll swing back around and it'll be normal again. | ||
| And it makes sense. | ||
| There's so many of these accusations that happen. | ||
| You know, after a while, they pile up, and then there's this, like, anti-male resentment, and then it'll swing back, and it'll normalize, and people are sort of reacting to the Aziz thing, and they say, well, that went a little too far. | ||
| And then the woman who was in charge of, the California woman who was a big Me Too supporter, she got busted. | ||
| Did you see that? | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Yeah, she was grabbing some dude's dick and grabbing his ass, and she was drunk, and she's... | ||
| Is she just a congresswoman? | ||
| No kidding! | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| You ever have a girl do that to you? | ||
| Yeah, I've been grabbed. | ||
| You know, like, Bill Burr said this famously, and he's 100% correct. | ||
| It's after shows, drunk women in their 40s, they get a little liquored up, they get crazy, and they just go for it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They get a little grabby. | |
| They grab that ass, they'll go for it. | ||
| And, you know, did you feel violated? | ||
| No. | ||
| You know, anybody who says it's not different for men is just a liar. | ||
| It's not physically scary. | ||
| It's like if my daughter comes and punches me and kicks me, you know, like she'll do that for fun, just as a joke. | ||
| It's not threatening. | ||
| Right? | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| It's silly. | ||
| But if you did it, I'd be like, hey, man, don't fucking hit me. | ||
| Like, a man hits you. | ||
| It's different. | ||
| Like, if a man is trying to grab a woman's ass, you're talking about someone larger grabbing someone smaller. | ||
| It's scary. | ||
| It's dangerous. | ||
| The real threat of rape is actually there. | ||
| No 40-year-old lady's going to rape me. | ||
| You know? | ||
| It's not going to happen. | ||
| Unless I want her to. | ||
| It's just not going to go down that way. | ||
| I'd have to be really sick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would like to... | |
| That'd be something really wrong with me. | ||
| Well, there was this guy, and see, this is how I like remembering jokes. | ||
| I haven't seen this guy probably tell jokes for 25 years. | ||
| His name is Paul Kelly, and it was right in the 80s, or at the end of the 80s, when women were in the workforce, and that was like one day at a time. | ||
| Remember that show? | ||
| It was all about women. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right, sure. | |
| And so things were weird in the workplace. | ||
| Men didn't know how to talk to women and how to act, and then they would go, oh, she's just like one of the guys. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| They would say that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Highest compliment you could give a woman. | ||
| She's like one of the guys. | ||
| We don't have to act weird around her. | ||
| And this guy, Paul Kelly, that's when people started to talk about sexual harassment. | ||
| And he said, see, men, we don't understand what that is. | ||
| It's like, wait a minute, you mean you're going to touch my dick while I type? | ||
| And I get insurance? | ||
| Well, we say that, but my friend TJ, do you know the amazing atheist? | ||
| Do you know who he is? | ||
| Oh, I do know who he is. | ||
| I've seen his show on YouTube. | ||
| Very funny guy. | ||
| He told me, and he's kind of an introvert, he told me that he was working in an office once and a woman who was his boss was sexually harassing him. | ||
| And it was completely unwanted and she would grab him and he would lock up and freeze and be uncomfortable. | ||
| And it was gross. | ||
| But he's a big guy. | ||
| I mean, he wasn't physically in danger. | ||
| I'm sure it felt super uncomfortable, but it's always going to be a notch, several notches, less scary. | ||
| Well, because she can't take out her dick and stick it in you. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| That's a big difference. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| The thing is the violation, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's like the fact that someone could physically hold you against your will and just stick something in you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And penetrate you. | |
| Get into your body. | ||
| Yes, inside of you. | ||
| Yeah, like a woman literally can't do that. | ||
| She can engulf you. | ||
| That could be scary. | ||
| Someone engulfing you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, Jesus. | |
| It just doesn't seem as scary, though. | ||
| It's just not the same violation. | ||
| What happened, officer? | ||
| Well, he said he was engulfed. | ||
| He engulfed my dick with his ass. | ||
| He just took it over. | ||
| Just tell your Weinstein joke. | ||
| Just tell it. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| Can't do it. | ||
| It'll be on... | ||
| I'm recording in April, so it's close. | ||
| We're only two months away. | ||
| Have you done that wrestling joke on a special? | ||
| No, all this stuff's new. | ||
| All this stuff is from my last special, which was last year, to now. | ||
| Well, you know, I have been... | ||
| What it was, what makes, I think, that set stick in my mind also is that it made me jealous, right? | ||
| Like, you know, when you... | ||
| I don't know if you get jealous. | ||
| I still get jealous when I see someone doing something better than me. | ||
| I want to do it. | ||
| And I'm like, God damn it! | ||
| It made me want to get out and... | ||
| I haven't been doing comedy as much, and you know, it's like a muscle. | ||
| I think Jerry Seinfeld said, if I don't do comedy... | ||
| For about four days, I notice a difference. | ||
| And if I don't do comedy for five days, they can notice. | ||
| So I haven't been... | ||
| Since I started my YouTube show, I haven't been doing stand-up as much as I should, and I stopped touring like I should, and I miss it. | ||
| I want to do another special. | ||
| And watching... | ||
| And that night of comedy at the Comedy Store made me go, God damn it. | ||
| I gotta get out here and stuff. | ||
| What the fuck am I doing? | ||
| That's the highest compliment. | ||
| You can pay a comic. | ||
| God damn it! | ||
| I felt that many times. | ||
| You know, that feeling of just being inspired. | ||
| I just want to go home and write. | ||
| Yeah, and I was, you know, I mean, my set went fine, but it wasn't, uh, I'm not on my game right now. | ||
| You know, I have to really start working it again, which I have started, and I'm going out, and it's, uh, it's my, I forgot, it's like, this is all I ever wanted to do in my life was stand-up comedy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And, like, being a stand-up comic to me was like being Ray Liotta in Goodfellas. | ||
| Like, you know, I didn't wait in line. | ||
| I fucking wanted something. | ||
| I took it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I stopped. | |
| You know, I don't fucking follow rules or listen to your bullshit. | ||
| I fucking do what I want, I say what I want, and they pay me for it. | ||
| I just fucking love that shit. | ||
| And then I started doing the YouTube show, and it becomes a job, right, for me? | ||
| And it's a grind, in a sense. | ||
| And doing comedy, I so miss sleeping till noon, and then getting up, working out, having... | ||
| All you had to do was figure out, who am I going to have lunch with today? | ||
| That was my big decision. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Who am I going to have lunch with? | ||
| Then I go home after the lunch. | ||
| I have a nap. | ||
| Then I go out and do a show. | ||
| It was the greatest life in the world. | ||
| Why did I fucking have that? | ||
| But you must enjoy doing your YouTube show, too, right? | ||
| I do, because it helps me to discover who I am more. | ||
| Because as a stand-up, I was like Bill Hicks was my favorite guy. | ||
| When I saw Bill Hicks in Chicago, I almost quit. | ||
| Because I was in comedy about three or four years, and I was like, I fucking know what I'm doing. | ||
| And before I got on stage, I'd be like, wait till they get a load of me. | ||
| I was like, that guy? | ||
| Oh, I'm the fucking baddest ass in Chicago. | ||
| And then everybody talked about this guy, Bill Hicks, right? | ||
| And I was like, I'm going to check this guy out. | ||
| So I sat down, and he starts his set, and about two minutes in, I started drinking. | ||
| And then about five minutes in, I started drinking more. | ||
| And about ten minutes in, I was convinced I was going to quit comedy. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You know, I always thought, like, George Carlin was my hero. | ||
| And I was like, you know, if I do everything right, I could maybe be like George Carlin for one special. | ||
| Like, maybe if I get everything right and I really work it. | ||
| And I saw Bill Hicks and I knew I was always going to be competing for second place. | ||
| And so when he died, it made me feel a lot better. | ||
| I was like, oh, fuck, I'm back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Oh, that's the worst. | ||
| Now, it was the saddest thing when he died, of course. | ||
| He was my hero, and, you know, I didn't really know him. | ||
| I knew him tangentially, and it was weird to feel that kind of sadness for someone who you don't know personally. | ||
| And so that was a big deal to me, watching Bill Hicks. | ||
| It totally changed my life, and I tried to be like him, of course, like an idiot. | ||
| I tried to be like him, and you can't, right? | ||
| And then one time I was dating this girl, and it might be my wife, I don't know who told me this, but she said, Like, where you come from? | ||
| Because I come from the south side of Chicago, grew up poor, 12 kids, drinking powdered milk, you know, and having the shit beat out of me from the fucking morning till night, right? | ||
| Because I went to Catholic school, a tough neighborhood. | ||
| And she's like, you can't be angry like Bill Hicks, because you look like you come from privilege, money, and you're dressed well. | ||
| I always like to dress nice, because I grew up poor. | ||
| I always wanted to be... | ||
| And so that's when I had to pull back on the anger on stage, and I was like, if you watch my specials on Comedy Central, I'm very nice. | ||
| And doing the YouTube show is what let me connect with my anger, which is always what drives me. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| And that is what has connected with people, and that's when I really started selling tickets and everything I wanted to get from comedy, in a sense, I got from this YouTube show. | ||
| So now I can go wherever I want and do a show, and just my fans will show up. | ||
| It's the greatest thing that ever happened in my life. | ||
| Well, you're very good on your YouTube show, and you're also very fair. | ||
| You know, one of the things that I really like about your show is you're obviously a left-leaning guy, but you're very balanced in your criticism of the left, in your criticism of criticism of the left. | ||
| Well, if you have to lie to make your point, you don't have a good point. | ||
| I agree with you a thousand percent. | ||
| It's such an important thing that's being missed today. | ||
| Yeah, and I don't know. | ||
| I've gone back and forth on issues. | ||
| Everybody, I think you can be allowed to go back and forth on issues. | ||
| You know, I was against gun control. | ||
| I was for gun control. | ||
| Then I was against it again. | ||
| I mean, you know, so... | ||
| The thing that people give me a lot of hard... | ||
| I get more of a hard time from people who consider themselves on the left than people who consider themselves on the right. | ||
| Today, right? | ||
| Today. | ||
| This is a new thing, though, isn't it? | ||
| Over the last decade? | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's because... | ||
| Maybe less than a decade. | ||
| Well, to me, it really started with Bill Clinton in 92, but it didn't get really ramped up until Barack Obama in, like, 2010, when it was clear... | ||
| That Barack Obama was a neoliberal corporatist who was going to do the bidding of the war machine and Wall Street and Big Pharma, which is why when the Democrats got control of government, they had the presidency, the Senate, filibuster-proof Senate for a few months, and they had the Congress and the House, and they didn't pass single-payer or even a public option. | ||
| What do we get? | ||
| We got a right-wing health care plan anyway, which is a giveaway to the pharma and health insurance companies that left out 28 million fucking people. | ||
| And infuriated small business owners, infuriated people that had a small practice, that there were doctors and all sorts of people that were... | ||
| It was better than what we had. | ||
| It was a bad solution. | ||
| It wasn't a solution. | ||
| What it was was a solution for the... | ||
| The pharmaceutical companies and the health insurance companies... | ||
| How is it better than what we had? | ||
| In what way? | ||
| Well, because before there was pre-existing conditions and you couldn't get coverage, so now you could always get coverage. | ||
| So that part was better. | ||
| The fact that you can get covered even if you had an issue. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| So then you could go on an exchange and stuff like that. | ||
| I never had to do that. | ||
| I always got through my wife's employer. | ||
| I always had my health insurance, right? | ||
| And by the way, having health insurance is... | ||
| It doesn't really mean that much. | ||
| I got really sick. | ||
| Well, you were talking about this before the podcast. | ||
| Well, this is a different thing, but I had an illness that they couldn't diagnose for a few years. | ||
| And it almost killed me, right? | ||
| What was it? | ||
| It was called hypophosphatemic osteomalacia. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| That should be on late night TV. Like one of those commercials? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you have osteopharmatriculitis? | |
| Side effects include death. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| It's a bone disease, so my bones were emitting... | ||
| The bottom line is my bones were having bone disintegration. | ||
| Yeah, I used to be much taller. | ||
| I know that sounds funny, right? | ||
| It's actually true. | ||
| Is that true? | ||
| When we met, I was taller than you. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| How tall were you? | ||
| I was around 5'10". | ||
| And you shrank to 5'8"? | ||
| I'm a little under 5'8". | ||
| Wow, that's crazy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So, I know, right? | ||
| And when that happened, I was going to kill myself. | ||
| Did you try to stretch yourself out? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Get one of those things they use, medieval torture devices. | ||
| Ah, the rack. | ||
| So I'm one of those guys who, if I want something, no matter what price I have to pay, physical, whatever, I'll pay it, and I'll get that thing I want, right? | ||
| Like, I'll get it. | ||
| But can you mind elaborating on this thing? | ||
| Yeah, so I couldn't fix it by stretching. | ||
| I couldn't fix it. | ||
| I was just joking about that, but... | ||
| So what does it do to your... | ||
| It's making your bones shrink? | ||
| Yeah, so it gives you osteoporosis, and then my bones got hollow like an old lady. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| And then my spine collapsed when I stepped off a curb and too hard. | ||
| And they didn't know what it was. | ||
| I don't like talking about it too much, but they told me all different kinds of things. | ||
| Oh, it's your muscles. | ||
| It's your nerves. | ||
| It's in your head. | ||
| It's in this. | ||
| And I was limping for a few years, and people were always like, how are you doing? | ||
| I'm like, I'll be all right. | ||
| And, you know, because no one likes to hear about anybody else's. | ||
| And then when that happened, they were like, oh, no, it's your bones. | ||
| I was like, you motherfuckers. | ||
| So everybody told me that you should go. | ||
| So I started going to bone doctors, and everybody told me I should go see this guy, Dr. Charles Sharp. | ||
| And I called him, and he was expensive, and he didn't take insurance. | ||
| And so I was like, well, I'll go to someone he trained. | ||
| So I'll go to someone he trained. | ||
| I wouldn't get any better after six months. | ||
| I go to someone else he trained. | ||
| He wouldn't get any better. | ||
| So finally I was just about to die. | ||
| And I went to see him. | ||
| I was going to pay the money and go see him. | ||
| And he figured out what it was like that. | ||
| Really? | ||
| And he says to me, he goes, you know, no one in the... | ||
| Nowhere you go, no one's going to know what this is. | ||
| I go, yeah, I know. | ||
| I've already been everywhere. | ||
| And he said, I only saw this once before in 1968. And he says, and you have it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holy shit. | |
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| What causes it? | ||
| It was just my own... | ||
| They didn't know at the time. | ||
| He thought it was a tumor, but they since figured out it was just my own bones leaching of hormone that makes your body leach the chemicals that I need to make bone. | ||
| So anyway, this is boring. | ||
| No, it's not boring at all. | ||
| So he fixed me, and I started... | ||
| How did he fix you? | ||
| He just diagnosed me what was wrong and what I needed, and so I need to take supplements, right, for my bones to make bones. | ||
| Like some people take calcium, so I take this thing called phosphorus, because you need phosphorus and calcium and vitamin D to make bone. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So we did that, and it was amazing. | ||
| You know, he's just an amazing doctor, and he's very right-wing, as far as I can tell, right? | ||
| He doesn't like to talk politics, but it comes up. | ||
| And he was in the military and all this stuff, and he's just a great guy. | ||
| I just love him. | ||
| He's so smart. | ||
| He's so smart. | ||
| And he fixed me. | ||
| So getting back to when I was going to kill myself. | ||
| So when I stepped off the curb and I shrunk, And I was shrunk even more. | ||
| They did an operation that gave me about an inch back. | ||
| I was even shorter, right? | ||
| So I'm like, holy fuck. | ||
| I'm like, this is hor- this is like I wanted to kill my- I was literally gonna kill myself. | ||
| What was the operation they did? | ||
| They had to put something in your spine? | ||
| Kyphoplasty, mm-hmm. | ||
| Like a bar or something like that? | ||
| They cement. | ||
| They puff it up and then they stick cement in it. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| Anyway, but I- so I was serious. | ||
| I was like, I cried one day. | ||
| I couldn't stop. | ||
| I didn't know how to stop. | ||
| And my eyes puffed up like I couldn't see almost. | ||
| And I was gonna do it. | ||
| I was like, I'll just kill myself. | ||
| And And the only thing that kept me from not killing myself was my manager called me and he said, hey, you got that hour special on Comedy Central. | ||
| And I was like, what? | ||
| I was like, what? | ||
| Talk about it was the best of times, it was the worst of times. | ||
| I could not believe. | ||
| I'm like, what? | ||
| And then I just knew I had to do this special because I couldn't let all those motherfuckers who said I shouldn't move to L.A. and be a comedian. | ||
| I couldn't let them win. | ||
| It was about that. | ||
| It was about, I'm going to show everybody who doubted me and said I was crazy, I'm going to show them, I'm going to do this goddamn special, it's going to be fucking awesome, and then I kill myself. | ||
| Jesus Christ, Jimmy. | ||
| And by the time, so I had to get this, anyway, long stories, I had to get this operation in my leg, it was the Bo Jackson surgery. | ||
| You got a hip replacement? | ||
| The thigh bone was dying. | ||
| And I went to, so my doctor sends me to this other doctor who vented the operation at USC, and I walk into the office, just like my doctor predicted, he's looking at my chart and he looks up and he goes, what? | ||
| I've only seen this in books, meaning what I have. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And I was like, that's what Dr. Sharp said. | ||
| And so he was going to give me this operation. | ||
| He goes, we're going to take this bone out from your shin. | ||
| We're going to put it in there. | ||
| And then you can't step on that foot for six months straight. | ||
| And I said, I have an hour special. | ||
| I'm taping in eight months. | ||
| I go, so I can't do this operation. | ||
| He goes, well, your thigh could just snap at any moment. | ||
| I go, I guess that's the chance I gotta take. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Because if I can't do this special, I'm gonna kill myself anyway. | ||
| I give a fuck, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| So, by the time we got to do the special eight months later, Dr. Sharp's treatment had kicked in, and they didn't know it was gonna fix it, but it fixed it. | ||
| They were like, it fixed it. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| You could have got that crazy operation for nothing? | ||
| Yeah, for nothing. | ||
| Fuck, man. | ||
| So his treatment is just supplements? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| And do you take that to this day? | ||
| Every day. | ||
| Every time I eat, I have to take two phosphorus. | ||
| Did you alter your diet? | ||
| No, he tells me to make sure I eat meat because I need whatever it's in it I need. | ||
| The stuff? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Whatever the good stuff is. | ||
| He'll look at me like, he goes, you're from Chicago, right? | ||
| And I go, yeah, eat meat. | ||
| Like that. | ||
|
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Like, you're not one of those fucking plant-eating assholes. | |
| Like, you're not one of those, are you? | ||
| Right. | ||
| And it's sad that I'm turning into one of those now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| Damn it! | ||
| What, a plant-eating asshole? | ||
| Well, I saw this fucking video about cows. | ||
| I've seen those too. | ||
| No, no, not those. | ||
| So in, I don't know, Norway or Denmark, I don't know where, somewhere over there, they have a law that you have to let the cows out of the barn in the spring by this one day. | ||
| Oh, you're talking about the one when the cow jumps out and starts bouncing around? | ||
| Like a dog. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, I've seen that. | ||
| And so they all come out and they start jumping around like dogs! | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| And I was like, oh my god! | ||
| I couldn't eat my dog! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You know? | ||
| And that was the first, like, oh, Jesus. | ||
| And then I accidentally saw this video about a pig, and I can't eat pigs anymore. | ||
| I can't eat porks. | ||
| I can't. | ||
| And I'm that close to not eating meat, but I eat a lot of pasta. | ||
| You know, I like to cook. | ||
| But your doctor said, but pasta's terrible for you. | ||
| Yeah, I know, right? | ||
| I eat whole wheat pasta. | ||
| Oh, that's not any better for you. | ||
| That's not better? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, it's terrible for you. | ||
| Whole wheat pasta has the same amount of gluten in it. | ||
| It's the same amount of sugars in it. | ||
| It's maybe slightly better than refined pasta. | ||
| Like, wheat bread is slightly better than white bread, but it's all bullshit. | ||
| It's all just filler. | ||
| There's not very few nutrients. | ||
| But seven grain bread is better. | ||
| It's all horseshit, man. | ||
| Bread is horseshit. | ||
| It's not good for you. | ||
| Don't do this to me. | ||
| It just is. | ||
| Wheat is just not a good food. | ||
| It's a good filler. | ||
| I mean, if you're starving, it'll keep you alive. | ||
| I mean, that's literally what they invented it for. | ||
| They ground up wheat and figured out a way to cook it. | ||
| And the wheat that we're eating today is not heirloom wheat. | ||
| It's all wheat that's been adjusted and genetically modified so that it has higher yield in smaller areas. | ||
| There's a documentary called What's With Wheat. | ||
| It's really fascinating. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, and they go over the details of what happened with wheat, but it's somewhere in the early 19th century, or 20th century, rather. | ||
| In the early 1900s, they started altering wheat. | ||
| And they did it so that they can get higher yield in a smaller area. | ||
| But by doing that, you increase the amount of complex glutens in the wheat. | ||
| It makes it much more difficult for people to digest. | ||
| And that's where you see the elevation of all these gluten sensitivity issues. | ||
| And people are like, when I was a kid, there was no gluten sensitivity. | ||
| First of all, nobody knew what the fuck happened. | ||
| You got fat, you had a heart attack, and you died. | ||
| They really didn't know. | ||
| They were much less aware of why people were fat. | ||
| But sugars, wheat, Those are two of the biggest problems we have. | ||
| No kidding! | ||
| Yeah, it's terrible for you. | ||
| So when I went to this Chinese medicine doctor, it was back when I was feeling sick, and so I went to, somebody recommended, you should go to this Chinese medicine. | ||
| I'm like, I'll try whatever. | ||
| So what he did was he changed my diet. | ||
| So he got me off of white sugar, dairy. | ||
| Even brown sugar is terrible for you. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| And carbs, basically. | ||
| And he told me not to drink soda. | ||
| And I said, well, I drink diet. | ||
| He goes, that's worse. | ||
| Because of the chemicals in it. | ||
| And so I was like, holy shit. | ||
| I was like, okay. | ||
| So then he sells you these herbs for $800, and they're a month's supply. | ||
| So I realized that's all I ate. | ||
| When I got out of his office, every time I eat, I'm eating white flour, I'm eating bread, or a pizza, or a pasta, or a cheese, or everything. | ||
| Everything he told me not to eat, that's all I ate. | ||
| So I was like, I remember my girlfriend said, how long are you going to do this? | ||
| I go, at least for a month, because that's how much these herbs are in the $800. | ||
| I don't want to... | ||
| So by day three, I was leaping out of bed. | ||
| I could not get over how much energy I had. | ||
| Yeah, it's because you don't have that big insulin crash. | ||
| When you're eating all that sugar and all that bread, your body's just fighting that shit off all the time, trying to process it, and then there's this big crash. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then you have to take a nap. | ||
| What do you eat? | ||
| I eat mostly meat and avocados and healthy fats and vegetables. | ||
| But I hunt, so everything I eat is wild. | ||
| So when I'm eating meat, I'm eating elk or deer or something along those lines. | ||
| You don't feel bad when you see the deer you just shot? | ||
| I do feel a sense of loss, but I do also know that this is a wild animal that had no idea what was going on until an arrow hit it. | ||
| It's not like something that's living in some pen and being tortured and genetically modified and filled with antibiotics and hormones. | ||
| It's a wild animal. | ||
| And their life expectancy is very short. | ||
| They get taken out by bears and wolves and coyotes and pumas. | ||
| They're not making it. | ||
| None of them are making it. | ||
| Zero. | ||
| Zero percent. | ||
| They're starving to death. | ||
| They're freezing to death. | ||
| What you're doing is just dipping your foot in the wild world. | ||
| You are taking part in the cycle of life. | ||
| So you're against factory farming and stuff? | ||
|
unidentified
|
100%. | |
| That's why I became a hunter. | ||
| I was either going to become a vegetarian or I was going to hunt. | ||
| Those were my two options. | ||
| I had to figure out what I was going to do. | ||
| And I experimented with vegetarian back when I was fighting to try to make a weight class. | ||
| I didn't like it. | ||
| I just didn't feel good. | ||
| And then when I started eating meat, I did it for like six months. | ||
| And then when I started eating meat, I got way better. | ||
| Like instantly. | ||
| Like instantly started gaining muscle. | ||
| Instantly was fighting better. | ||
| Instantly competed better. | ||
| And I moved up a weight class. | ||
| And that's when I became my very best. | ||
| What's your weight class? | ||
| What did you fight at? | ||
| 154 is what I moved up to. | ||
| I was trying to stay at 140. I fought at 140 only for a year when I was 18. I just couldn't do it. | ||
| Now, did you bring your power with you, Joe, when you went up to 154? | ||
| Yes, I did. | ||
| Well, you know, I was 18. I was still growing. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| I was still thickening up. | ||
| Oh, that's young. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So I was artificially keeping my body very, very thin. | ||
| I was very lean. | ||
| But my point is that I knew that there... | ||
| When I watched too many of those videos, factory farming videos... | ||
| Factory farming should be... | ||
| I mean, fuck insider trading and all the other problems that we have in the world. | ||
| That's all terrible stuff, right? | ||
| Terrible stuff. | ||
| Factory farming is a goddamn crime. | ||
| It's a horrible crime against life. | ||
| And the fact that we just do it and that we have ag-gag laws... | ||
| Yes, that's what's... | ||
| They're insane. | ||
| Those laws are fucking criminal. | ||
| They're insane. | ||
| It's not America. | ||
| It's not the America I thought of. | ||
| I thought we were supposed to have a free press. | ||
| That's the equalizer. | ||
| That's what's different about us. | ||
| And now they gag the press. | ||
| You can't talk about crime. | ||
| They could sue you. | ||
| They could put you in jail if you film the tortured animals. | ||
| If you film a crime. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| So there's some famous saying, when exposing a crime is a crime you're ruled by criminals. | ||
| I don't know if that's the quote, but... | ||
| By the way, we're living in a lawless time, right? | ||
| So the law only applies to the poor. | ||
| It does not apply to war criminals. | ||
| It doesn't apply to Wall Street. | ||
| It doesn't apply to anybody. | ||
| Giant corporations have figured out a way to skirt the law with money. | ||
| If you steal from rich people, they will get upset, like Bernie Madoff. | ||
| He stole from rich people. | ||
| That was wrong. | ||
| He fucked up. | ||
| But if you're Jamie Dimon or if you're Goldman Sachs and you steal from poor people or veterans or old ladies, that's fine. | ||
| That's fine. | ||
| Then you become Secretary of the Treasury, like Steve Mnuchin. | ||
| Mnuchin is one of my favorite evil characters of the 21st century. | ||
| When you see him... | ||
| With his wife, and his wife has gloves on, and they're holding the money, and she's smiling, and when she fucking tags, like, Gucci and Cartier and all these different, like, big-time companies in her Instagram posts, when she's stepping off of a fucking private jet, like, holy shit! | ||
| Look at that picture! | ||
| I love that picture! | ||
| First of all, the fact that she would fuck him, that's a crime. | ||
| That woman is a thief. | ||
| That's the power of money. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, but it's also prostitution. | ||
| That's a crime. | ||
| You don't think she's hot for him? | ||
| No. | ||
| I do not. | ||
| I'm going to be honest with you. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I think if you were there, I'd say, okay. | ||
| He's got a funny personality. | ||
| He's a good guy. | ||
| She probably enjoys it. | ||
| You know, it doesn't make any sense. | ||
| But let me just say this. | ||
| Steve Mnuchin is horrible. | ||
| And he should probably be in jail. | ||
| But guess what? | ||
| He's not in jail. | ||
| Because why? | ||
| Because the Democrat didn't prosecute him when she was supposed to. | ||
| That's Kamala Harris. | ||
| So she's corrupted by Wall Street, too. | ||
| So you point your finger at him. | ||
| You're like, well, the reason why he's there is because the Democratic Party is corrupted. | ||
| That's why he's there. | ||
| What did he do that he should have got put? | ||
| Well, Kamala Harris is... | ||
| So he ran One West Bank, and they investigated his bank, and they found a thousand instances of criminality. | ||
| It's only a thousand, though. | ||
| That's what I said. | ||
| It's a thousand. | ||
| Anything less than a million instances. | ||
| Like, what the fuck? | ||
| It's water under the bridge. | ||
| You can't be picky. | ||
| A little this, a little that. | ||
| Yeah, you gotta break a few eggs. | ||
| Come on! | ||
| Make omelets! | ||
| So they said, and if we investigated, we would find a thousand more instances of criminality. | ||
| She said, don't. | ||
| And that was that, and she never had an answer for it. | ||
| And now she's the darling of the corporate class. | ||
| The same people who anointed Barack Obama and Bill Clinton are the same people who are anointing her. | ||
| So that's the problem. | ||
| Barack Obama's entire cabinet came from an email from Citigroup. | ||
| So people trying to say that somehow corruption started on January 2017 are fooling themselves. | ||
| And that's what I'm fighting against. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You are, and you're one of the only people that are doing that. | ||
| You're one of the only people that are online that you're not obligated to shill for the left. | ||
| You're not doing it. | ||
| But everybody else seems to be. | ||
| I don't mean everybody else, if you're one of the people that are not. | ||
| Thank you, Joe Rogan. | ||
| There's just a handful of people who are not, Joe. | ||
| There's so few. | ||
| There's so few that are calling out people in the Democratic Party for what really is going on. | ||
| Like, I was infuriated when people that I knew that I was friends with were trying to tell me that Hillary Clinton was a good choice. | ||
| That's the same choice. | ||
| I'm like, look, I don't know if she's murdered people, but I know that I worry that she's murdered people. | ||
| That's a real... | ||
| I really wonder. | ||
| Like, this Seth Rich shit? | ||
| I know. | ||
| First of all, you don't even need to go there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You don't. | |
| There's so many other things. | ||
| There's so many other things that we'd know for a fact. | ||
| The Clinton Foundation, for instance. | ||
| So, the Iraq War. | ||
| I'm old enough, Joe, to remember when being for the Iraq War was a disqualifier in a Democratic primary. | ||
| I That's where I'm from. | ||
| That's why she lost to Barack Obama the first goddamn time she ran. | ||
| And all of a sudden, we're supposed to... | ||
| Now people, like Joy Behar says, that was a long time ago. | ||
| Forget about it. | ||
| Why don't you go tell that to a mother who's got a dead soldier? | ||
| Why don't you go tell them that they just died in an illegal war? | ||
| Why don't you go tell that to a couple hundred thousand Iraqis who are dead? | ||
| Get over it. | ||
| It was a long time ago. | ||
| You fuck... | ||
| Anyway, so I remember when that, also, the Bill Clinton was no friend to the working men. | ||
| In fact, he was this demise, starting of the demise of this country. | ||
| So, you know, Ronald Reagan scared the shit out of the Democrats so much that he decided to become like them. | ||
| And so what Bill Clinton did was he got in bed with Wall Street, the military industrial complex, big pharma, health insurance, and the Koch brothers. | ||
| He started a thing called the Democratic Leadership Council with Al Gore. | ||
| They had executives from the Koch brothers on the Democratic Leadership Council. | ||
| They completely turned their back on the working man. | ||
| And what happens when you have two parties that are in bed with management? | ||
| You get Donald Trump. | ||
| And that's exactly what happened. | ||
| They gutted welfare at the same time they explored the prison population, called black kids super predators, at the same time they did NAFTA. And then they deregulated Wall Street, which crashed the economy within 10 years. | ||
| That's what Democrats did. | ||
| Democrats did shit that Ronald Reagan could only fucking dream about in his wet dreams. | ||
| They couldn't pass NAFTA. George Bush couldn't pass NAFTA. It took Bill Clinton to do it. | ||
| Bill Clinton gave the cover to the other corporate Democrats to go along with it. | ||
| So that was the beginning of the end for the working class in America. | ||
| In fact, now, you know, I wouldn't vote for Hillary Clinton, and that's why a lot of people on the left came after me, and they still do. | ||
| Well, it was confusing to me that you were saying, hey, if you want to vote for a real progressive, what about Jill Stein? | ||
| Yeah, if you vote for a party... | ||
| Here's a program you actually agree with, the Green New Deal. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But everybody's like, no, you're throwing away your vote. | ||
| How are you throwing away your vote? | ||
| So we all know for a fact... | ||
| Because of the WikiLeaks emails that Hillary Clinton had a thing called the Pied Piper strategy, which was, she told her minions in the press, please prop up Donald Trump. | ||
| Prop him up. | ||
| Why did she want Donald Trump to be propped up? | ||
| Because she wanted to run against Donald Trump, because she knew that she was so repulsive to most of the country, she needed someone who was more repulsive than her. | ||
| Turns out, that was a bad calculation. | ||
| That's a terrible calculation. | ||
| So that's called the Pied Piper strategy. | ||
| That's why you turn on Chris Hayes and he would show Donald Trump's empty podium for an hour instead of a Bernie Sanders. | ||
| And then he wags his finger at people with no money and no power for not voting for a corporatist warmonger like Hillary Clinton. | ||
| Why do you think the people in Michigan wouldn't vote for Hillary Clinton? | ||
| Maybe because she put half of them in fucking prison? | ||
| Maybe because she passed NAFTA and Barack Obama was trying to sell TPP at the top of his lungs at the same time she was trying to get working people to vote for her? | ||
| They know what the fuck was going on. | ||
| And that's why half the country doesn't vote. | ||
| But you're going to wag your finger at the people who actually do vote? | ||
| Who come out and vote their conscience? | ||
| And they don't fucking prop up evil? | ||
| You know what the voting for lesser of two evil gets you? | ||
| Donald fucking Trump! | ||
| Well, there's also a really sneaky thing that happens where you have two parties, and one of them you think of as this conservative, warmongering party, which automatically makes the other party the enemy of that. | ||
| Yeah, but they're not. | ||
| They're not. | ||
| We have two pro-war parties, and there's not an opposition party. | ||
| They oppose Trump on the most ridiculous bullshit. | ||
| They just voted for an extra $160 billion to go to the war machine. | ||
| $160 billion. | ||
| Let's remember, Bernie Sanders wanted to pay for free college, which was somewhere around $65 billion. | ||
| And everybody said, he's fucking crazy. | ||
| How are you going to pay for that? | ||
| They just did that in a blink of an eye. | ||
| They passed $160 billion to a war machine that we don't have an enemy to fight. | ||
| You know, Russia spends $65 billion a year on their military. | ||
| They're a paper tiger. | ||
| We've got no fucking enemies out there. | ||
| We have to keep inventing them. | ||
| The last enemy they invented was ISIS. ISIS, I don't know, we're supposed to shit our pants over them, Joe, because they have kitchen knives. | ||
| They'll cut your head off with a kitchen knife. | ||
| That's what I'm supposed to be afraid of? | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| It's amazing how they can keep us scared so they can keep perpetual war going. | ||
| This is an Orwellian nightmare, and the Democrats right now should be screaming about the Pentagon budget, but they're not screaming about it because they're complicit! | ||
| They're in it! | ||
| And that's what's wrong with this country. | ||
| That's why we can't have nice things. | ||
| So when they tell you that we're broke and we can't afford stuff, they don't mean we can't afford trillion-dollar wars, trillion-dollar bank bailouts, billion-dollar oil subsidies, and prison construction. | ||
| That's not what they mean. | ||
| They mean we can't afford shit like healthcare, or education, or roads, or bridges, or firemen, or libraries, or anything that makes your fucking life better. | ||
| Because whenever they need bombs, they got it. | ||
| Hey, we're broke for Social Security. | ||
| We're broke for Medicare. | ||
| How about for bombs? | ||
| Oh, we got bomb money. | ||
| We keep it right through our fucking drinking money. | ||
| That is true because we're not really in a war in the sense of like World War II or World War I. We're in this weird war of... | ||
| It's like a calculated war. | ||
| They're all economic wars, Joe. | ||
| So we went into Iraq for the oil. | ||
| Libya is because he wanted to go off the petrodollar. | ||
| But it is stunning how much funding this kind of war gets versus all the different social programs that we need in this country. | ||
| Yes! | ||
| Infrastructure programs. | ||
| Yes, and people always think like, well, how are you going to pay for that? | ||
| We don't have to spend any more money. | ||
| We can actually spend less money. | ||
| We don't have to spend $750 billion a year on a military that's bloated. | ||
| We have 1,000 bases around the world. | ||
| We don't even know how many bases there are because lots of them are secret. | ||
| So what do you say to the argument that we need them in order to stay safe? | ||
| That's not true. | ||
| That's the big argument, right? | ||
| The big argument is this is the way we've destroyed ISIS because ISIS was on their way to building up and becoming a real threat. | ||
| We invented ISIS. We invented Al-Qaeda, and then we invented ISIS. We certainly aided in their... | ||
| Development. | ||
| Their development. | ||
| And then we directly funded them. | ||
| For people that don't know, the whole Mujahideen story, which Osama Bin Laden was our guy. | ||
| That's our guy. | ||
| He was our guy fighting against the Soviets. | ||
| He was an anti-Russian freedom fighter, is what they called Osama Bin Laden. | ||
| And then all of a sudden they didn't need him anymore. | ||
| And we're still in Afghanistan 17 years later. | ||
| Three more years, that war gets a gold watch. | ||
|
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|
Pfft! | |
| What do they do? | ||
| I mean, what do they do to get us out of there? | ||
| I mean, literally, what is the exit strategy? | ||
| There is none. | ||
| There is no exit strategy. | ||
| There never was an exit strategy. | ||
| There's no exit strategy from the Mideast. | ||
| In fact, they just announced we're going to be permanently in Syria. | ||
| And by the way, the Syrian war is complete bullshit. | ||
| Those gas attacks now have been completely debunked. | ||
| I didn't believe them the first time. | ||
| So what happened during those gas attacks? | ||
| So that's called a false flag. | ||
| So what happens is they wanted the United States to come in on their side to bomb Assad, to overthrow him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And so what they would do is they would do a gas attack on their own people and then blame it on Assad. | ||
| Has this been proven that they did it? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| And the first time was in, I think, 2013, and Barack Obama wanted to bomb. | ||
| And I knew it was bullshit then. | ||
| Do you remember when everybody freaked out about that? | ||
| Yes, and then he didn't bomb them. | ||
| Remember he didn't get to bomb them? | ||
| Everybody was like, fuck you. | ||
| Yes, he goes, let's put it to a vote in the Congress. | ||
| And the people don't want war, Joe. | ||
| So the people said, fuck you. | ||
| And he was like, hmm, we're going to do it anyway. | ||
| Guess what? | ||
| They did it anyway. | ||
| They dropped so many bombs on Syria, they ran out of bombs. | ||
| That's a fact, right? | ||
| So the Air Force was out of bombs. | ||
| Which year was this? | ||
| So, was it 2015? | ||
| They dropped so many bombs in the Mideast, they ran out of bombs. | ||
| That's just a fucking fact. | ||
| Look it up. | ||
| Well, if you buy all these bombs, you have to use them. | ||
| I mean, what are you going to do with them? | ||
| They're just going to sit around, and what if somebody accidentally sets one off while they're in American soil? | ||
| We don't want that. | ||
| We can't have that happen. | ||
| And here's the weird thing that the left is doing right now. | ||
| They're attacking Donald Trump from the right. | ||
| And what do I mean by that? | ||
| So they say Donald Trump is a Putin puppet. | ||
| And the only way you can prove you're not a Putin puppet is you gotta bomb somebody. | ||
| You gotta bomb Syria. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| They were like, oh, he's president today because he bombed Syria. | ||
| Remember that fucking Brian Williams almost nutting in his pants? | ||
| Well, all he bombed was airstrips. | ||
| So that's what they're saying. | ||
| So they go, oh, oh, they bombed airstrips. | ||
| Oh, you bombed the old planes and not the new planes. | ||
| So what that is, you're attacking Donald Trump from the right. | ||
| Because left people are supposed to be for detente, and you're supposed to be anti-war and anti-war. | ||
| Anti-empire, right? | ||
| So when you attack Donald Trump, you're going, oh, you didn't really bomb them. | ||
| You're attacking them from the right. | ||
| You're saying he should be more militaristic, which is fucked up. | ||
| Well, it supports the argument that everything is circular, right? | ||
| That as far right as you get, as far left as you get, you really come to some sort of strange ideological point, like zero point. | ||
| That can be true, but not in this instance. | ||
| Because what's happening there is corporate right-wing Democrats are attacking Trump for not being right enough. | ||
| What you're talking about is where I'm at, where I'm anti-war, and then there's also anti-war, anti-interventionist people on the right. | ||
| So a lot of people voted for Donald Trump because of that. | ||
| Because he always said he was an anti-interventionist. | ||
| He was going to get us out of the Middle East. | ||
| It was crazy to be there and bring our boys home and all. | ||
| And that's why a lot of people did vote for Trump because of that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And that's why a lot of people said they felt more comfortable voting for Trump, because Hillary actually promised more war in Syria than he did. | ||
| And that's turning out to be true, because she wanted a no-fly zone, which means we're going to shoot down a Russian jet? | ||
| Are you fucking crazy? | ||
| Right. | ||
| So... | ||
| I'm on the left anti-war. | ||
| There's no anti-war movement in the country that's represented by a political party right now. | ||
| Do you think that this right, though, the way the left is attacking Donald Trump from the right, as you say it, don't you think it's just because they see an opening there to criticize and to point out his vulnerabilities? | ||
| What they're doing, this whole Russian narrative... | ||
| Is the establishment not wanting to examine the system that gave us Donald Trump? | ||
| And so they want to distract you with Russia until we get to the next election. | ||
| And it's working. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| That's a very good way of putting it. | ||
| Distract you from a system that's archaic and outdated and doesn't work. | ||
| They're not asking that question anymore. | ||
| Why do people vote for Donald Trump? | ||
| In fact, the only time they asked it, they took the shittiest answer was because of racism. | ||
| Really, the same country that voted for Barack Obama twice. | ||
| Well, somebody just doubled down on that the other day. | ||
| That's just so fucking... | ||
| Someone was saying... | ||
| Are there racists who voted for Donald Trump? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| Of course. | ||
| Alonzo Bowden said it best. | ||
| He said, not all Trump supporters are racists, but all racists are Trump supporters. | ||
| Fucking Alonzo. | ||
| That's a great line. | ||
| And, you know, I went to a Trump rally, and it was disgusting and scary. | ||
| And it was all xenophobia, and it was all race. | ||
| It was worse than I thought it was going to be. | ||
| Well, he found he tapped into that. | ||
| But what's interesting about him tapping into that is this is not something that he had been chiming on about for years. | ||
| He was a Democrat for the longest time. | ||
| He's not an ideologue, which is, you know, I heard when he got into office, he was like, why don't we just give everybody Medicare? | ||
| Which is, of course, the answer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You just give everybody Medicare. | ||
| Because it saves its money. | ||
| Instead of food stamps, let's give them food. | ||
| He's like, we have this issue with people where they buy cigarettes and booze and stuff with food stamps. | ||
| Let's just give them food. | ||
| It's not a bad idea. | ||
| That's not a bad idea. | ||
| I mean, if it's healthy, good food, I mean, have places where people can go and pick up healthy, good food. | ||
| That might be a very good idea. | ||
| You know, we need an infrastructure plan in the United States. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| And FDR did that, right? | ||
| He gave old people retirement. | ||
| He gave young people a job. | ||
| He gave people dignity. | ||
| He gave them a job. | ||
| And he said, if you're willing to work, you'll have a job. | ||
| Remember the old saying when I grew up was, there's going to be a chicken in every pot and a car in every garage or something like that? | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| And they don't say that shit anymore, right? | ||
| Because the government is not there to help you anymore. | ||
| But the government does pretend that they are. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| One of the things that Trump is going on about is how many more people are working today than before. | ||
| African-American unemployment is at the lowest point in 40 years. | ||
| The economy is booming, all these different things. | ||
| When they say the economy is booming, they mean Wall Street is booming. | ||
| But there's no correlation between Wall Street and regular people's lives. | ||
| There's not? | ||
| Well, the stock market has been booming. | ||
| I remember I got called into CNN to do a thing when the stock market crossed $13,000. | ||
| Now it's up $25,000. | ||
| That was a big watershed moment. | ||
| That was just like eight years ago I got called in to do that at CNN. That was like, oh my god. | ||
| So we've doubled the stock market. | ||
| People's paychecks haven't doubled. | ||
| People's lives have gotten worse, actually. | ||
| But I have a problem with saying that, because there's just too many people you're dealing with. | ||
| When you say people's lives have gotten worse, like, what people? | ||
| There's too many people. | ||
| Well, I'll tell you, so 63% of the country can't afford a $1,000 emergency. | ||
| Half the country right now is either poor or low income. | ||
| 50% of all wage earners earn less than $30,000 a year in the richest country in the world. | ||
| Jack Ma, who is the Jeff Bezos of Asia, he runs the Amazon of Asia, and he said, you know, the problem with the United States isn't making money, it's that you guys don't distribute it right. | ||
| Well, that's some communist shit coming over from China. | ||
| You're going to let that slide by, Jimmy Dore? | ||
| Well, it's called those communist billionaires are buying up all our real estate. | ||
| How the fuck did a socialist country produce all those billionaires? | ||
| Well, go to, well... | ||
| As soon as they got into communism, or into capitalism rather, they did it in a very ruthless way. | ||
| I mean, you look at what, it's really kind of fucked up, like what's going on with some of the places where we buy our goods, like Foxconn, where they make iPhones, they have nets around the building to keep people from fucking jumping off. | ||
| But when Trump has been in office for only a year, he can't expect all those things to change, but his argument has been that those things are improving. | ||
| You think it's all horseshit? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| So why is African American unemployment at the lowest rate that it's been in 40 years? | ||
| Is that because it's unreported? | ||
| Like, when people stop looking for jobs, they stop counting those as being unemployed. | ||
| So there's that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They stop taking unemployment and they stop looking for jobs. | ||
| So they don't count them. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They don't count them, but they're still unemployed. | ||
| It's a real sneaky statistic. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Also... | ||
| I would really like it if someone was honest about that. | ||
| I would like it, too. | ||
| Like, what's the real unemployment rate? | ||
| That's what we want to know. | ||
| What's the real unemployment rate? | ||
| How would we find that out, though? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Maybe... | ||
| I noticed a guy named Mark Blythe. | ||
| He would probably know what it is. | ||
| He's an economist. | ||
| He coined the term global Trumpism. | ||
| And he has a great line. | ||
| And he tells the elites about how they're running the economy. | ||
| Of course, I'm going to butcher it, but he says, you know, the Hamptons aren't a defensible position. | ||
| It's a low-lying area. | ||
| He's got a Scottish accent. | ||
| The Hamptons are a low-lying area. | ||
| That's a very bad area to be in. | ||
| Not a defensible position, meaning when the fucking people come for you, you're dead. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's not like there's a military base in the Hamptons. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You're not up on a hill. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good fishing, though. | |
| People can get to you. | ||
| A lot of gold diggers. | ||
| So the jobs suck. | ||
| Everybody's jobs sucks. | ||
| And we hollowed out the unions. | ||
| NAFTA was the crushing blow to the unions in this country. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| Unions is one of the things that actually cushions the blow of the brutalities of a free market, right? | ||
| So you have unions, you have social programs, because capitalism fucks everybody, and so you have to have all these things in place to kind of cushion the blow of it. | ||
| And we got rid of them, right? | ||
| Bill Clinton gutted welfare at the same time he did NAFTA. I mean, and then he exploded the prison population. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| But people that I know that were in unions, particularly some friends that I have that were in the auto union, were saying that it was getting completely bloated. | ||
| They were having two people doing a job that was only for one person, and there was all this... | ||
| There was all this real, wanton, purposeful waste. | ||
| And this was all designed into certain contracts. | ||
| This is a buddy of mine that was an auto worker in Detroit. | ||
| He said, we had shifts where there was supposed to be two people on the job, but everybody knew it was a real simple thing. | ||
| You work a machine. | ||
| So I would work four hours, and he would work four hours. | ||
| Or I would work a day, and he would work a day. | ||
| But we both punched in. | ||
| And it was just common, and there were several of those. | ||
| And he goes, and you were getting $100,000 a year, $200,000 a year for some jobs, just ridiculous amounts of money for jobs that really didn't warrant that kind of income. | ||
| And he said this was all negotiated into the contract. | ||
| He's like, it's a good thing to give fair wages and healthy wages and health insurance and all these different things. | ||
| He said, but it was unquestionably bloated, which opened the door to all these factories going to Mexico and all these other places. | ||
| Well, what opened the door for those factories? | ||
| I would say two things to that. | ||
| First of all, it's kind of anti-logical to think that the union would say, no, we're not going to negotiate on this and go ahead and take our jobs, both of those jobs, to Mexico. | ||
| I don't think they had a chance. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Number two is, if you look at the strongest economies, you look at Germany, they have strong unions. | ||
| Japan, they have strong unions. | ||
| And by the way, the unions sit on their boards. | ||
| Well, there's also a real problem in the 1980s, and I guess a little bit in the late 70s when the oil crisis happened. | ||
| America was making dogshit cars. | ||
| They were just making terrible cars, and then Japanese were making these cars that were goddamn bulletproof. | ||
| You'd buy a Toyota Corolla, and that fucking thing would go 400,000, 500,000 miles without a single problem. | ||
| You know, you buy an Oldsmobile. | ||
| And that thing would shit the bed inside of a month and a half, and you'd be fucking furious. | ||
| And everybody was like, buy American, buy American. | ||
| And a lot of people were like, well, fuck you, man. | ||
| You're making shitty cars. | ||
| I bought a Dodge Daytona. | ||
| I had it for maybe three months, and the handle fell off in my hand. | ||
| I went to open the door, and it came off in my hand. | ||
| I was like, motherfucker! | ||
| And that was, I think, the first car I ever bought. | ||
| Well, I was a road comic. | ||
| I'm like, I have to buy a Honda. | ||
| I'm a road comic. | ||
| I can't. | ||
| This has been the early 90s. | ||
| I'm like, I have to buy a car that I can rely on in the winter. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| I had an Accord. | ||
| I had a Civic. | ||
| They're the best. | ||
| They never break. | ||
| They never broke. | ||
| So I would look at that. | ||
| Unions, it's not the problem. | ||
| The unions aren't the problem. | ||
| In fact, unions are an answer to the problem. | ||
| And if you look at the economies everyone wants to be like, look at Germany. | ||
| By the way, the German unions just won the right to work 28 hours a week, and they got a 4% pay raise. | ||
| I would say that's 8 hours too much. | ||
| I would agree with you. | ||
| I was talking about this yesterday with Johan Hari who wrote a book on depression and one of the major causes being the way people live their lives without control, doing things they don't want to do. | ||
| And he was saying that somewhere in the neighborhood of 87% of the people are doing things they don't want to be doing most of the time. | ||
| For a job. | ||
| And I was making the argument that we've set up this structure that's just completely ridiculous and we've stuck with it because it's just the way we've always done things. | ||
| It's 40 hour work week plus overtime. | ||
| It's chaos. | ||
| You're losing your life. | ||
| And by the way, we'd be working more if it wasn't for unions. | ||
| We have a weekend because of unions, right? | ||
| Back to the Foxconn thing. | ||
| They don't have unions, and they have fucking nets around their building and dormitories where they work. | ||
| So that's what people say about Amazon, too. | ||
| And my whole thing is, like, people are like, why do you still, you know, you can't use Amazon, you can't. | ||
| I'm like, you know, it's so hard to live off the grid. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| It's like, I drive a car, so I'm going to have to buy gas from Exxon or Shell. | ||
| All right, so does that make me a bad lefty because I'm supporting an oil company? | ||
| You're supposed to get a Prius, bro. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I mean, you still put gas in a Prius. | ||
| Oh, that's right. | ||
| You've got to get a Tesla. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| But then you're rich. | ||
| You're a rich piece of shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, the Tesla 3 is a cheaper one, right? | ||
| It's like $50,000 or something? | ||
| But if you get the shit you want on it, it's still going to cost more. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You want AC. You want electric wind. | ||
| Right. | ||
| What you got to do is you got to get an old car, like an old Civic, and then rebuild it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, I lease now. | ||
| I don't buy cars. | ||
| That's a scam, I think, buying cars. | ||
| But anyway... | ||
| It is for the most part, but not if you buy classic cars. | ||
| Oh, no, that's different. | ||
| Definitely. | ||
| If you're Jay Leno. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You have to stick your chin out when you do that. | ||
| Boy, his new show is fantastic. | ||
| It's really good. | ||
| That car show is... | ||
| That's the show I wish he would have been doing all along. | ||
| I said the exact same thing. | ||
| Are you kidding me? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I couldn't believe how much I liked it. | ||
| I like him. | ||
| I like him on that show. | ||
| Well, you know why? | ||
| It's because he's passionate. | ||
| I like him! | ||
| It's like, that's who he really is. | ||
| You know, when you would watch him interview someone, you could tell he didn't give a fuck about the question he was asking. | ||
| Do you remember the Bill Hicks bit? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Bill Hicks bit about him interviewing... | ||
| Hey, Joey. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hey, Joey Lawrence. | |
| That's right. | ||
| You got a car now, you driving? | ||
| You driving? | ||
| You got a girlfriend? | ||
| You got a girlfriend? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, yeah. | |
| And then Bill Hex would have Jay Leno reach into his drawer and pull out an Uzi and stick it in his mouth. | ||
| I used to be a fucking real comic! | ||
| And he blows his brains out and it forms an NBC peacock on the wall. | ||
| On the wall behind him. | ||
| Because he's a company man to the bitter end. | ||
| That was the bit. | ||
| And he had him reloading. | ||
| Oh my god, what has it become? | ||
| Well, that's the weirdest thing. | ||
| Jay Leno was, again, one of my inspirations to become a comedian. | ||
| Back in the early day. | ||
| Yeah, and I would tell people that, and they were like, huh? | ||
| Because they only knew him from The Tonight Show. | ||
| And I'm like, I don't know what he's doing on that show, but he's the funniest guy in the world. | ||
| It would be like if Dave Chappelle, before he did Chappelle's show, decided to host a talk show and then completely stopped anything controversial and completely stopped having an opinion on anything. | ||
| If you look at that, when Jay Leno used to go on David Letterman... | ||
| He was the guy. | ||
| He was the guy. | ||
| He was edgy and dangerous. | ||
| Super edgy. | ||
| Super edgy. | ||
| He made fun of corporate America like nobody's business. | ||
| He was a sharp comic. | ||
| I'm the best comic. | ||
| So that's why it was funny. | ||
| When he got The Tonight Show, I just didn't think he showed off his talents. | ||
| No. | ||
| But for him, that was making it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He made it. | |
| Yeah, that was in his head. | ||
| In his head. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| In our heads, we were like, what? | ||
| Did you miss everything? | ||
| Like, what the fuck are you doing? | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I was on The Tonight Show. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| And a couple times, one time I was on, and during the break, I sat there with Jay, and I said, I think it was the first time I was on, I said, hey, man. | ||
| I go, what was up with that Bill Hicks bit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I go, what was that about? | |
| No! | ||
| Shit! | ||
| I had to. | ||
| I had to ask. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ugh! | |
| Because I was like, what are the odds I want to be on the show again? | ||
| I'm like, I'm on once. | ||
| I think it was... | ||
| The Fear Factor days, which is like, in the early Fear Factor days, I was 100% convinced that show was canceled at any second now. | ||
| So I'm like, this is my one chance to get on the Jay Leno show. | ||
| Let me ask him some questions. | ||
| So he's like, do you like doing that joke? | ||
| And I go, yeah, yeah, it's not bad. | ||
| I go, hey man, let me ask you this. | ||
| I go, what was up with that Bill Hicks thing, right? | ||
| And his take on it was, you know, well, I wanted to do jokes for everybody. | ||
| I wanted to do comedy for everybody, and Bill just didn't believe in doing comedy for everybody. | ||
| I thought it was interesting. | ||
| I don't think he expected me to ask it to him. | ||
| I had him on the podcast, and he was fucking fantastic. | ||
| Because after he'd retired, he told some stories about doing stand-up for mob people, and about this guy fucking screaming at a priest, you fucking motherfucker, put the fucking... | ||
| And it was a hilarious thing to watch Jay Leno telling hilarious stories... | ||
| And swearing like a fucking longshoreman. | ||
| And I was like, wow, this is crazy. | ||
| You're a regular guy. | ||
| You've always been a regular guy. | ||
| You were just doing the Tonight Show thing. | ||
| And I heard stories about Jay that he loved to watch hacky comedy. | ||
| And the reason why this stuck in my head was because I used to do that, too, with Todd Glass. | ||
| We would... | ||
| We would, if the worse the comedian, the better. | ||
| We'd have three specials lined up for a night. | ||
| We'd be like, fuck, this is going to be great! | ||
| And we found out after, I found out that Jay Leno used to do the same thing. | ||
| When he would see a comic that he didn't think, you know, he thought was horrible, he would hunt down a tape of it and then everyone would have to come over to his house and they'd watch it. | ||
| This is a story I heard, so maybe this isn't. | ||
| I'm sure it's true. | ||
| And I'm like, holy fuck! | ||
| That's what we do. | ||
| Well, he just turned everything mild. | ||
| You know, he turned everything mild for many, many years. | ||
| It just wasn't who he was or what made me like him. | ||
| And it confused me. | ||
| And I felt personally let down by him. | ||
| I felt like he let down comedy. | ||
| Because now he was supposed to show the old people what the new people were doing in comedy, and then he just kind of didn't. | ||
| But now you see him, and he's a very likable person. | ||
| He's fun. | ||
| His show is fun. | ||
| That show, it's because exactly he's talking about shit he cares about. | ||
| That show was not made for him, the Tonight Show. | ||
| Even though he was the number one show, so what do we know, right? | ||
| It was still the number one show, so maybe I'm wrong. | ||
| Well, it was a different thing, you know, because Letterman... | ||
| He seemed passionate. | ||
| He seemed to be enjoying it. | ||
| And when he would say witty things and sharp things to people, you could tell he was getting a little bit of a thrill out of it. | ||
| There was some excitement to Letterman's position that you didn't sense with Jay Leno. | ||
| Jay Leno was just like, well, you know, making everybody happy. | ||
| So the thing I liked about late night shows when I was younger was that there was a sense of danger, that anything could happen. | ||
| You didn't know it was going to happen, right? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Burt Reynolds is going to come out drunk. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| You know, shit like that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| And they used to smoke. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah! | |
| And they would talk about things. | ||
| They would talk show. | ||
| They would actually talk about things. | ||
| And, you know, watch Dick Cavett. | ||
| And I remember he had Mort Sahl come out with Jane Fonda and Peter Fonda right after the Easy Rider came out. | ||
| And they're all talking. | ||
| Like, this is a fucking... | ||
| And that's counterculture. | ||
| And it's right on... | ||
| And so it was really good. | ||
| That's when shows were... | ||
| That's dead. | ||
| Now they're all fluff. | ||
| It's all fucking bubblegum bullshit. | ||
| Well, there was an outlet for that, though, and it was filled by comedy in podcasts. | ||
| Yeah, so now podcasts are doing that, and those late-night shows, I have no idea what they're doing or why they even exist. | ||
| They're weird. | ||
| Even Stephen Colbert, like Stephen Colbert's show on Comedy Central, just a brilliant, brilliant show. | ||
| And now he quit to get way more money to do a more popular show that is way less relevant, interesting, or creative. | ||
| But it is funny when he fucking mocks Trump. | ||
| It's funny how hard he goes. | ||
| The fact that he said that Trump's mouth, but that he uses his mouth as Putin's cock holster, the fact that they said that on CBS, I was like, wow, this is what happens when you have to compete with the internet. | ||
| Who the fuck could have imagined ever in your wildest dream? | ||
| That lefty comedians would be doing McCarthy smears? | ||
| Who the fucking thought, huh? | ||
| Right on national TV. But a joke like that. | ||
| I get the McCarthyism thing, but the joke of a cockholster, the president's mouth being used as Putin's cockholster, that that would be on CBS. I get that you're applauding that he broke a boundary. | ||
| Well, I'm not applauding it. | ||
| I'm just saying it's fascinating that we've changed what's the bar, what you're allowed to do. | ||
| And because it's Trump, if they said that about Hillary Clinton, if he said, because look at all this Russia dossier memo shit that's coming out. | ||
| I mean, it turns out that a lot of this stuff is horseshit. | ||
| So a lot of people who weren't around for the first McCarthy shit, they're getting to experience it now. | ||
| This is what it's like. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This is what it's like. | ||
| And you're like, what? | ||
| Even the media is? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And the media goes along. | ||
| Yeah, this is what it's like. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| I don't want to spend any amount of time talking about it, but it's so unbelievable. | ||
| They forgot. | ||
| You're talking to a wall when you tell people, just go, well, you mean there was collusion? | ||
| I go, what's collusion? | ||
| What does that mean, collusion? | ||
| That Trump colluded with the Russians hacked into John Podesta's emails, and somehow they needed Trump to help them? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| What the fuck? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because that's what they're saying. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| And that there's some kind of quid pro quo, and that now Trump is a Manchurian candidate, and that he's Putin's puppet. | ||
| But you notice they're moving the goalposts every day. | ||
| So now it's, oh no, now he's in bed with Russian oligarchs doing money laundering. | ||
| Well, you don't know. | ||
| There's a sale of a home. | ||
| A Russian bought it! | ||
| Russian! | ||
| So they've totally moved the goalposts from being treason to now he's just regular corrupt like everybody else. | ||
| Because let me tell you something. | ||
| Everybody else is regular corrupt like Trump. | ||
| But I don't even know if it's regular corrupt because we're talking about a sale of a house from quite a few years ago. | ||
| Well, there's more. | ||
| That's one thing, but they're talking about lots of other things, right? | ||
| And I say, you want to talk about collusion? | ||
| He opened up eight businesses in Saudi Arabia during the goddamn campaign. | ||
| There's your fucking collusion. | ||
| But nobody talks about that because Saudi Arabia is supposed to be on our side, even with a repressive theocracy that beheads people in the streets. | ||
| But we like them because of the petrodollar, which no one ever talks about the petrodollar. | ||
| It's dirty. | ||
| Well, that's what props up our dollar right now, the economy. | ||
| So what people don't know is that in the early 70s, Richard Nixon took our country off the gold standard, and we went on the petrodollar. | ||
| And what was that? | ||
| We promised Saudi Arabia the use of our military anywhere they wanted, as long as they would convert every dollar of oil that someone bought for them in American dollars. | ||
| So if you want to buy oil from Saudi Arabia, you first have to convert your currency into American dollars. | ||
| Which is the real reason why we invaded Iraq the first time. | ||
| Well, it has a lot to do with it. | ||
| It's why we're in Yemen right now. | ||
| We're doing siege warfare in Yemen, which is a war crime. | ||
| That guy just got convicted of it at The Hague. | ||
| So we're doing that in conjunction with Saudi Arabia. | ||
| And why are we doing that? | ||
| Because of the petrodollar. | ||
| And it's all about why are we in Africa? | ||
| It's Everything comes down to money, and why are we in Syria? | ||
| They wanted to put a natural gas pipeline through Syria, and Russia doesn't want it because they want to sell the natural gas to Europe. | ||
| That's what this is about. | ||
| It's not about babies. | ||
| It's not about freedom. | ||
| It's not about liberty. | ||
| You clearly don't like country music. | ||
| I like real country music. | ||
| What is real country music? | ||
| I like country like the Outlaw comedian. | ||
| Merle Haggard? | ||
| Yeah, I like that guy. | ||
| Waylon Jennings? | ||
| Yeah, I like Willie Nelson. | ||
| Yeah, not these fucking pussies who want to be Boy Scouts and my mama and all that shit. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| What? | ||
| Pussies. | ||
| I'm not supposed to say pussies? | ||
| Well, it's going to be a time when we can't say pussies anymore. | ||
| Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. | ||
| George Carlin. | ||
| So a lot of people are trying to use hashtag MeToo for puritanical reasons, and that's not what it's about. | ||
| Hashtag MeToo is about fucking stopping men who use their power and station in life. | ||
| To hold it over women for sexual purposes. | ||
| That's what that's about. | ||
| It's not about being a Puritan. | ||
| It's not about being anti-porn. | ||
| It's nothing wrong with lusting after a woman's tits and a woman's ass. | ||
| There's nothing wrong with that. | ||
| And there's nothing wrong with a woman wanting to be fucked by a man. | ||
| Those are normal things. | ||
| That's okay. | ||
| And don't let people hijack that movement and try to use it for Puritanism. | ||
| This is what a lot of people are doing. | ||
| Shit, piss, fuck, on, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. | ||
| I'm triggered. | ||
| I hope you're triggered, too. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, absolutely. | ||
| I mean, I think that what we're dealing with is an exposure of sexual assault, exposure of sexual harassment, sexual assault, particularly in the workplace. | ||
| You know, and this is a giant issue for people that have to work alongside men and women, and they develop these little communities inside these little boxes that we call offices, and things get really fucking weird. | ||
| And if you have a boss that's a piece of shit, And he's constantly harassing the women that work there, and it becomes a living hell with them. | ||
| There's stress, they're going through... | ||
| I mean, it is a crime. | ||
| You're doing something to those people that work there. | ||
| You're putting this pressure on them. | ||
| You're fucking up their life. | ||
| Could you imagine doing... | ||
| The last thing I would ever want to do was impose myself sexually on a woman who didn't want it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Right? | ||
| Well, you're a healthy person. | ||
| For some people, it's just about getting to the end goal. | ||
| We've all been drunk. | ||
| Right? | ||
| We've all been on a date where a woman didn't want to have sex, and we did, and we pushed the issue, but... | ||
| You know, I just can't imagine... | ||
| Like, I just never... | ||
| I just can't... | ||
| I don't get that. | ||
| She doesn't like you. | ||
| Oh, I'm gonna make her go feel uncomfortable? | ||
| Like, what the fuck do you get out of that? | ||
| That's just weird. | ||
| Well, there's people that hate the opposite sex. | ||
| I mean, and I say the opposite sex. | ||
| I don't mean just men who hate women. | ||
| There's women who hate men. | ||
| There's people who have associated the opposite sex with rejection and pain and frustration all of their life. | ||
| You look at a guy like Harvey Weinstein. | ||
| That is an ugly, fat guy, right? | ||
| Right? | ||
| There's no women who are lusting after him. | ||
| It was his power and his money that got him into a position where he could get some pussy. | ||
| And then having power over all these actresses and then hearing whether it's Uma Thurman or whatever famous actress, Salma Hayek, all these superstars. | ||
| We're fighting this guy off in hotel rooms. | ||
| I mean, it's fucking crazy. | ||
| I mean, he's a maniac, but he's a disgusting guy who has no shot at getting someone to appreciate him physically. | ||
| They might like his personality, but for someone to be physically attracted to him is almost impossible. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I mean, he's eating himself into this disgusting shape. | ||
| Unless you have a fetish or whatever. | ||
| Yeah, you might be just into getting fucked by Jabba the Hutt. | ||
| Just big fat guy with pockmarked skin shooting loads all over you. | ||
| There's no way it makes any sense, right? | ||
| But if he was going to put you in Ocean's Eleven... | ||
| You gotta do what you gotta do. | ||
| Well, you know, Matt Damon, what did Matt Damon say that they were trying to get him out of that new Oceans movie? | ||
| Well, didn't he say something about there's a continuum or something, that everything is Harvey Weinstein? | ||
| Wasn't that it? | ||
| I don't remember the exact quote, but it was something along the lines of, we have to make a differentiation between sexual assault and men hitting on women. | ||
| What's really interesting is seeing how they're acting about this in France and in Europe. | ||
| A lot of women, especially older actors. | ||
| Did you see that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Did you see? | ||
| That's wild. | ||
| They want men to be men. | ||
| And in France, I mean, they're just France, pardon. | ||
| They're just different over there. | ||
| They have a different attitude. | ||
| The same as Brazil. | ||
| My friend Tiago from Brazil told me once, he's like, man, he goes, if you're in Brazil and he goes, if you're with a girl, you don't try to fuck her. | ||
| She's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? | ||
| Like, you're not even trying to fuck me? | ||
| What the fuck is wrong with this? | ||
| They'll get mad at you. | ||
| Brazil is a very sexually aggressive place. | ||
| I'll never forget, I was working at a comedy club and there was a girl there who was beautiful. | ||
| She flirted with me, and, well, I didn't know if she was flirting with me, because she was just beautiful. | ||
| And she talked to me, so I'm like, oh. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But I wasn't going to make a move at her, because I'm considering every comedian who comes in this club makes a move on this girl, because she's the prettiest girl around. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| So I didn't do anything, because I didn't want to be that guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And then, I'll never forget, by the end of the week, it was the last night, and she's like, hey, there's a party at my house tonight. | ||
| Are you going to come? | ||
| And I was like, oh, sure. | ||
| Right? | ||
| So I went to there, whatever. | ||
| Cut to... | ||
| I'm leaving, and she goes, are you fucking kidding me? | ||
| And I go, what? | ||
| She goes, I threw a party just to get you to my apartment, and you're going to leave? | ||
| And I was like, oh, really? | ||
| You want to? | ||
| And so we had sex. | ||
| Damn, she had to beat you over the head with it. | ||
| Yeah, so there was a woman who was... | ||
| But you didn't want to be the guy that was super aggressive against a girl that was like, hey, I just like you. | ||
| You're just a fun guy to hang out with. | ||
| Does everything have to be sex? | ||
| And I know every guy in the world hit on her. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I honestly... | ||
| I mean, I don't want to say this because... | ||
| It's almost like in this day and age, you've got to get to know someone forever before you fuck them. | ||
| I mean, literally forever. | ||
| I tried to fuck my wife the first night we went out. | ||
| Good. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| And she wouldn't, which has probably worked out because we're still together. | ||
| But I did it in a charming way, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| I would say, honey... | ||
| Let me ask you this. | ||
| Why did you try to fuck her on the first night, but it took you five nights for the waitress? | ||
| Because I didn't want to be that guy at the club. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| That makes sense. | ||
| Because it's a work environment. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| So you're the opposite of a sexual harasser. | ||
| I guess so. | ||
| I guess not that I look at it that way. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The opposite. | ||
| You're sensitive. | ||
| Not that you weren't attracted to her. | ||
| You just didn't want to be a dick. | ||
| Yeah, I didn't want to have that reputation of that guy. | ||
| And plus, there's plenty of women in the audience. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's plenty of women. | ||
| So I would tell her, I remember the first night we were together, I was like, hey, I know you're going to say you want me to go home, but you're going to worry that I'm too tired to drive and that I might get in an accident, so you don't have to say that, I'll just stay. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| And she's like, no, it's okay. | ||
| I go, it's nice of you to say that. | ||
| You're strong. | ||
| You're brave. | ||
| But I know you're going to worry, so I'm just staying. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| I think I did end up staying, but we didn't have sex. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And probably two more times like that. | ||
| But also, you don't really know someone's personality for a long time. | ||
| I mean, that's part of the problem. | ||
| The problem is people have physical needs, and they get attracted to each other, and the next thing you know, look, there's been many times in my life where I wind up having sex with somebody who turned out to be crazy. | ||
| And then, you know, you're one, two dates in, and you're like, yeah, she seems cool, and next thing you know, you're hanging out, and a week or two later, and she does something completely fucking insane, and then the crazy just starts leaking out of her pores, and you're like, oh, well, now what have I done? | ||
| I've entangled myself with some person who knows where I live and expects me to call them every day and we're going to get together and I have to figure out a way to back out of this. | ||
| And then you try to back out of it and they get fucking angry at you. | ||
| This is back in the old days when people would actually call you up angry too. | ||
| There was no text messaging back then. | ||
| You'd just pick up the phone and someone starts yelling at you. | ||
| Yeah, or I would just duck them for a while until they found some new guy. | ||
| Remember when people used to answer their phone? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Remember those days? | ||
| I don't ever answer my phone. | ||
| No one ever answers their phone now. | ||
| Well, I get too many phone calls from people I don't know. | ||
| I just get phone calls from numbers I don't know. | ||
| I'm like, where's this guy get my fucking number from? | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
| I just look at it, I'm like, eh. | ||
| Do you ever have, I answered a call, because I didn't, because, you know, you're like, oh, maybe it's that business I just called or calling. | ||
| You don't know, right? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| So I took one one time, and it was just a number. | ||
| It didn't come up, and it was someone asking me for money, to borrow them money. | ||
| It was just a person you know? | ||
| I knew tangentially in comedy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| And I didn't say this, and I was like, do you know that your name is not even in my fucking phone book? | ||
| And you're asking for money. | ||
| And you're asking me for money. | ||
| That's a desperate move. | ||
| That must be a person who's like a gambling addict or something. | ||
| That's what I thought right away. | ||
| But getting back to this thing about the women, you know, one time I had a woman, when I first moved to LA, I was dating her, and... | ||
| I went to her house, and she was really creative, and she was cute, and she wrote songs, and she would sing them for me. | ||
| I love that shit. | ||
| And I remember we were going to go have sex, and she goes, hang on, and she took a drink. | ||
| And I go, what? | ||
| She goes, do you want a drink? | ||
| I go, no. | ||
| And she goes, hold on. | ||
| And she's like, drinking. | ||
| And I go, what are you doing? | ||
| She goes, I have to have a couple drinks before. | ||
| And then it made me not want to have sex with her. | ||
| Isn't that fucked up? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| I was like, wow, you have to have, you have to drink so you can feel comfortable. | ||
| I took it personal, which of course it was just her, it was, she needed to relax. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because she had fucked up, she had, or not, she had issues or whatever. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And so, that was it. | ||
| I was, I'm like, I can't be with a girl who has to drink to have sex. | ||
| Well, isn't it a thing, too, though, especially when you're young and single, it's like you don't want to get stuck in a bad situation. | ||
| I'd seen a lot of bad situations when I was young. | ||
| My own parents and other people's parents. | ||
| So I'd see anything fucking sketchy and be like, I know where this is going. | ||
| I don't want to deal with your problems. | ||
| I don't have those kind of problems, so see ya! | ||
| Yeah, I was the same way. | ||
| I had a lot of bad examples of people. | ||
| I have no idea why these people would be with the spouse they're with. | ||
| Like, why would you do that? | ||
| Like, well, maybe that's going to happen to me because it's unconscious. | ||
| So I started reading self-help books and watching John Bradshaw videos. | ||
| I don't know if you knew who that is. | ||
| Who's John Bradshaw? | ||
| He invented that term inner child and all that inner child work and all that stuff. | ||
| That guy fucked up a lot of people's heads. | ||
| I'm getting to do it with your child. | ||
| Bitch, you're 40. But it was helpful to me because he broke up the family dynamic, and he talked about how people act, and I come from a big family, 12 kids, and that, you know, how it's, like, it all balances out. | ||
| You'll have a bad kid and an angel. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Right. | ||
| And everything in between. | ||
| And so it helped me understand myself a lot. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So I wanted to understand my motivations so I didn't make bad choices in my life like I had seen people around me making. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because it's unconscious, right? | ||
| So you just do what's in habit. | ||
| You don't even know why you're doing what you're doing half the time. | ||
| You're not conscious of why you're acting the way you're acting or why you like what you like. | ||
| You just go, I like that. | ||
| Why? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Well, when I was struggling as a comic, one thing that I definitely did is I only gave a certain amount of room to relationships. | ||
| Because I knew that I really had to concentrate on my career. | ||
| Yes! | ||
| I'm like, if I don't, it will fall apart. | ||
| There was a kid that I started out with. | ||
| We both started out together, and he was a pretty funny guy. | ||
| And he got this girlfriend that was just very demanding, and he stopped doing stand-up less and less. | ||
| He was doing less and less sets, and then eventually he dropped out. | ||
| And then I ran into his son many years later. | ||
| And his son, you know, they wound up having a baby, and his son was saying that his dad just really regretted not getting into comedy. | ||
| I'm sure he's happy he has a nice son and all that stuff, and he had a family, but it just, it tanked him. | ||
| You know, there's a saying, I think it might have been Carl Jung, who said, nothing affects a child more than the unlived life of its parent. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oof. | |
| So, imagine being a father, and you went after your dream, and you gave it everything you can. | ||
| Now you can impart that to your kid, and your kid just absorbs it, being around you. | ||
| Now you didn't do that, you have all that... | ||
| On your resentment or whatever you feel because you didn't live what your life you were supposed to, and then you can't pass that off, and your kid absorbs that, too. | ||
| Well, I knew it was so hard to do anyway. | ||
| It was going to be so hard to make it, and the odds are stacked against you. | ||
| You're seeing everybody else drop off like flies. | ||
| You see guys can't get gigs. | ||
| They wind up quitting. | ||
| They get a day job. | ||
| They work less and less, and the next thing you know, they just completely stop doing stand-up. | ||
| It's so common. | ||
| And so when I would see, when I have relationships and I'd see those signs where girls are just demanding more and more of my time, why do you have to go up tonight? | ||
| I'm like, I have to go up four or five nights a week. | ||
| I have to. | ||
| You're kidding. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm like, you can come with me. | ||
| I've seen your act a hundred times. | ||
| Well, this is what I do. | ||
| This is what I do. | ||
| You know, I can't, I don't know what to tell you. | ||
| I meet guys who their spouses, their significant others aren't into their comedy. | ||
| And I'm like, how the fuck? | ||
| It's awful. | ||
| It's awful. | ||
| That's the thing that's... | ||
| What do you like about me? | ||
| My wife is... | ||
| I would say she's a fan of comedy, but she's been around me for a long time, and she's hard. | ||
| Like, if she watches stand-up and it's not good, she's like, this sucks. | ||
| Well, there's nothing wrong with that. | ||
| No, it's good. | ||
| It's a good thing. | ||
| You know, she's... | ||
| She's got an eye for it. | ||
| She understands it. | ||
| But I have friends whose wives hate comedy. | ||
| And they do stand-up. | ||
| That's crazy! | ||
| And they associate comedy with, like, taking their boyfriend away or taking their husband away. | ||
| Like, this is that thing that takes away my time, you know, from me with him. | ||
| Now he's off doing these joke things. | ||
| Fucking bullshit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| People get super selfish. | ||
| You need a better woman. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Someone who's deeper. | ||
| Well, you just... | ||
| People fucking settle. | ||
| They just settle. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Settle. | |
| They settle. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| My... | ||
| Anyway, there's so many... | ||
| I have to... | ||
| I forget we're on a show sometimes. | ||
| And I don't want to say shit. | ||
| I know. | ||
| He'll probably hear this. | ||
| So... | ||
| When I started comedy, I was dating this girl, sweet, sweet girl. | ||
| And she wanted to get married like you would expect, right? | ||
| So I was 24 at the time. | ||
| I was six years to get out of college. | ||
| And so she bought me a suit so I could go on interviews and get a job. | ||
| She wanted me to get a job. | ||
| She bought me a suit. | ||
| And I had started doing comedy that, right then. | ||
| And so about six months into doing comedy, I started getting Saturday Night Spots at a real club. | ||
| They would let me come up, do 10 minutes. | ||
| Not paid, but I could do it on the regular show, guest set. | ||
| That's huge at the time, right? | ||
| That's everything. | ||
| Oh my God, are you kidding me? | ||
| That's a godsend. | ||
| So we go out... | ||
| Clouds part. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| So on a Saturday night, I take her with me. | ||
| We're going to this comedy cottage. | ||
| And I do my set. | ||
| And there was lots of other new comics like me. | ||
| And they were like, oh, Jimmy, that was great. | ||
| It was a big deal. | ||
| It was a big deal for us. | ||
| One of our own got on. | ||
| And in the car ride home, she's not saying anything. | ||
| And finally, she just turns to me and she goes, you're really going to do this, aren't you? | ||
| And I go, fuck yes! | ||
| Did you just see what happened? | ||
| Of course I'm doing this! | ||
| What does that mean? | ||
| She knew that I was going to be a comedian and not married to her. | ||
| And that's what that meant. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow! | |
| You couldn't be both? | ||
| Not then. | ||
| I couldn't get married. | ||
| Jim Brewer is married to the same girl he's with when I met him. | ||
| I met Jim in 1991 or 1992. Happy kids, the whole deal. | ||
| Super happy. | ||
| She's super nice. | ||
| So the problem with stand-up comedy is you don't know where you're going to end up. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| So when you start, you don't know, can I even do five minutes? | ||
| And then you're like, well, can I do 15? | ||
| Can I get paid? | ||
| Can I do an MC? Can I be consistent? | ||
| Can I middle? | ||
| Can I head? | ||
| You don't know. | ||
| Can I work in a room? | ||
| Can I get on TV? You don't know! | ||
| You don't know. | ||
| Like, if you go to any other job, you go, well, if you do this, this, and this, then you'll get the promotion, and then you'll get that. | ||
| You have to meet your number, and then you get, oh, okay, I can meet my number. | ||
| There's no handbook. | ||
| Well, not only that, to this day, like, my agent called me to schedule something in New York for November, and I said, I can't. | ||
| And I said, I'm doing my special in April. | ||
| I don't know if I'm going to have an hour by November. | ||
| I assume I will, but I don't know. | ||
| I go, I'm not going to fuck people over at some big fucking theater and not have an hour yet. | ||
| I go, I'm going to do my best. | ||
| But May, June, July, August, September, October, November, seven months. | ||
| Most likely, I'll have a new hour. | ||
| Most likely. | ||
| But what if I only have a half hour? | ||
| What if I only have a half hour and I fucking bomb? | ||
| What if I do a half an hour of good comedy, but not the best, and then have nothing? | ||
| I can't take that risk! | ||
| Like, when I'm ready, I'll call ya. | ||
| So, when April rolls around, after I'm done and I chuck everything aside, I'm on a fucking rampage for like three, four months of just doing 10, 15 minute spots, writing a bunch of new shit, and trying to piece together an hour. | ||
| Then, it's going to take me a month or two to try to sort that hour out. | ||
| Try to figure out where everything goes and what the punchlines are. | ||
| Listening to recordings, writing things down, burning the midnight oil late at night. | ||
| I don't know if I can do it. | ||
| I mean, I'm assuming I can do it, but once I chuck my act aside, once the act that you saw that you thought was funny, that fucking thing's going in the toilet. | ||
| It's over. | ||
| Solver, baby! | ||
| I'm lucky in the sense that no one saw my last special, so I get to do those jokes. | ||
| I get to keep doing those jokes. | ||
| But what about your fans? | ||
| No, so I did... | ||
| This is funny, right? | ||
| So I did two Comedy Central specials, then I did my last one was for Hulu, and it was in, I think, 2015, maybe, or 14, 15? | ||
| And so because of my YouTube show, I sell tickets now, so people come out. | ||
| And so I was doing a show maybe six months ago, and I do the opening joke from my special. | ||
| And it kills. | ||
| And I go, you motherfuckers, none of you saw my special! | ||
| And then I was upset for a second, and then I was like, I get to do those jokes again! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, that's hilarious. | |
| So I'm going to do my own special and put it on my own thing, because I don't know where that even, like that Hulu special, it lives on Hulu somewhere. | ||
| Is Hulu still a thing? | ||
| It's still a thing, right? | ||
| Hulu's still a thing. | ||
| Right, I'm thinking of CISO. CISO's not a thing anymore. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know. | ||
| CISO went under. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's where Stan Hope had a special, Diaz had a special. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah, a bunch of guys who were really funny people had specials on CISO, and now CISO is not, it doesn't exist. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| I've heard about that going under. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They've tried it a bunch. | ||
| The CISO was a Sony thing, right? | ||
| Wasn't it? | ||
| Or was it NBC? I thought it was NBC. NBC. I think you're right. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now, like, Sony had Crackle, right? | ||
| That's just such a funny... | ||
| Remember they had Crackle? | ||
| I was thinking that Paul F. Tompkins bit about Crackle. | ||
| What did they call Crackle? | ||
| I can't remember how it went, but it was... | ||
| Oh, if they called Crackle? | ||
| Crackle, it would be... | ||
| That'd be cute. | ||
| It's so funny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I can't remember how it goes, but it's so funny. | |
| Yeah, well, there's not enough venues. | ||
| Are you happier now? | ||
| I've got to tell you, I was happier before. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| I was happier when my whole life was ahead of me, and when I first started hanging out at Largo and doing sets at the Improv and meeting all my heroes in comedy, to me, that was... | ||
| Ahead of your time. | ||
| Now it's like I feel pressure to stay where I'm at or be successful. | ||
| I don't know what it is I feel, but I feel like I'm working too hard and I'm not able to enjoy what I've accomplished. | ||
| And that's why I've been trying to, like I told you, you showed me that tank. | ||
| I've been trying to figure out how to stop my thoughts. | ||
| You can come in the tank anytime you want. | ||
| No, don't come in the tank. | ||
| Because people do do that. | ||
| There's a tank center out near Pasadena. | ||
| You told me in Pasadena. | ||
| I'll go ahead. | ||
| A giant place. | ||
| Find out the name of that place. | ||
| Give them a shout out. | ||
| The Float Lab in Venice is my spot. | ||
| That's the spot that built my tank. | ||
| They have a place in Westwood, and they are the best in the world. | ||
| And they actually supply the tanks to the place in Pasadena. | ||
| The guy who put this, my friend Crash, who put it in our studio... | ||
| Just Float. | ||
| Just Float is the place in Pasadena and I'm pretty sure it's the largest float center in the world. | ||
| So does that help you stop thinking? | ||
| No, the opposite. | ||
| I think in there, but I relax. | ||
| It's very relaxing physically because the water is warm and you float and you can do it after the show if you want. | ||
| I got another show that goes till 2 if you want. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| You totally can. | ||
| Thank you for the offer. | ||
| Let me think about it. | ||
| You would be the second person outside of me to be in there. | ||
| Dan Harris from ABC Good Morning America is the only other guy that's been in there. | ||
| Dan is a big meditation proponent. | ||
| So I try meditating and it just hurts my back and... | ||
| Oh, well that will be really good for your back because you become weightless. | ||
| You just float in there. | ||
| And the water's the same temperature as the surface of your skin so you don't feel the water after a while. | ||
| And you're in total darkness and total silence and you just chill out in there, man. | ||
| It feels good. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I gotta do it. | ||
| I gotta do something. | ||
| You know... | ||
| I heard this thing by Alan Watts, and he talked about how we know how to prepare for life. | ||
| We don't know how to enjoy life once it gets here. | ||
| You've got to get good at that, man. | ||
| That's something that you really need to concentrate on. | ||
| I know you're doing really well right now, and I'm a fan of yours, so when you say you're not happy, that bums me out. | ||
| I'm stressed. | ||
| Yeah, well, you've got to figure out a way to enjoy this thing. | ||
| I know, that's why I'm stressed. | ||
| You've got to be more silly. | ||
| Do you smoke weed? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Yeah, we'll smoke a little bit more. | ||
| Just enjoy it a little bit more. | ||
| I like smoking weed in the morning and now I can't because I have to fucking do stuff all day. | ||
| Oh, you definitely can. | ||
| Yeah, you definitely trust me. | ||
| It can be done. | ||
| But then I can't do anything. | ||
| You can. | ||
| No, you can. | ||
| Do you exercise? | ||
| No, I can't exercise. | ||
| That's my problem. | ||
| I used to be athletic. | ||
| I used to love sports. | ||
| You can't at all because of your gallbladder? | ||
| No, because of my bones. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Because of your bones? | |
| Every once in a while I'll forget. | ||
| Could you do yoga or anything? | ||
| No. | ||
| My doctor told me don't. | ||
| Don't do anything, your doctor said. | ||
| He told me to swim. | ||
| Oh, that's nice. | ||
| Swimming's great. | ||
| So he said I could swim. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| So, I like swimming, man. | ||
| I like getting high in swimming. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Yeah, it feels good. | ||
| But you can't ever exercise, like lifting weights or anything along those lines, because of your bone issue? | ||
| But I would think that lifting weights would enhance your bone density. | ||
| It just hurts. | ||
| That's why I can't. | ||
| I can't even pick up a suitcase, really. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Fuck, man. | ||
| I forget often, and I will, and then fuck, and then my back hurts for the whole day. | ||
| Your back. | ||
| So, yeah, because anyway, but it's about becoming present. | ||
| And let me listen to this guy, Eckhart Tolle. | ||
| Do you know who he is? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Power of Now. | ||
| I read that book. | ||
| Oh, did you? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that is really getting me... | ||
| Is he still alive? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that's really getting me... | ||
| You know, when things frustrate you... | ||
| I love what he says. | ||
| He goes, the world isn't here to make you happy. | ||
| It's here to frustrate you so you wake up. | ||
| Oh, I'm like, oh, so now you can use your frustrations as reminders to wake up. | ||
| And it's hard, because I have a temper, and that's the weird thing. | ||
| Now I hid my temper and my anger through my stand-up, and I was successful. | ||
| I had specials and everything, but now I don't hide it, and now I'm selling tickets, right? | ||
| Because that's their ultimate goal, is if you can sell tickets, then you don't need anybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| But I don't know why, it seems like there's some sort of internal conflict between you getting angry and ranting and talking about things that are very important to you and then going on stage and doing stand-up. | ||
| I don't think that they should be mutually exclusive. | ||
| No, I'm trying to bring them together now. | ||
| My wife would always tell me, you gotta rant on your stand-up set. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You gotta rant. | |
| You gotta get angry. | ||
| And I was like, okay, and I would never really do it. | ||
| Well, you just got to balance it out. | ||
| Just got to find out a way to make that rant funny, and then, you know, find perspectives that are relatable, where you go into this rant, but then bring it to these people in a digestible way, you know? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| What's happening is I'm showing videos now at my live shows, and those get me into that groove. | ||
| And I just dropped a video... | ||
| What kind of videos? | ||
| Like, I just dropped a video about... | ||
| I did a live show at the Flappers in Burbank and I showed a video of Keith Olbermann apologizing to John McCain and George Bush on The View. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| He was talking to Meghan McCain. | ||
| Is this recently? | ||
| This was a couple months ago. | ||
| Is he going crazy? | ||
| Because he retired from that show that he was doing in a basement. | ||
| So Trump excites the lizard brain of a certain kind of neoliberal, and Olbermann's certainly one of those guys. | ||
| He pretends all the problems in our country started on January 2017, and that's certainly not it. | ||
| Like, he was great. | ||
| He could deconstruct what was wrong with Hillary Clinton back in 2008 when she was running against Barack Obama. | ||
| And he could deconstruct what was wrong with the Iraq war and what was wrong with Bush and Cheney. | ||
| But I don't know, somehow, all of a sudden now, it's like, again, Trump excites his lizard brain, and all his critical thinking skills go out the window, and he pretends that Trump is the problem and not a symptom of the problem. | ||
| Well, it was like a scene in a movie when he was doing that. | ||
| It looked like he was doing a show in the basement somewhere with this weird background. | ||
| It was called The Resistance. | ||
| This is The Resistance. | ||
| But he was also, he didn't, wasn't making connections. | ||
| Like, was that really pretty conservative girl, Tammy Lauren, is that her name? | ||
| She did a thing where she was covered in the American flag and he was talking about how hypocritical it is to be standing there holding and draping yourself in the American flag and then Donald Trump Jr. posts a picture of Tammy Lauren right next to him doing the same thing and Donald Trump Jr. says it must be painful to be so stupid. | ||
| Well, I don't even understand how he could have not known he took that picture to be saying that. | ||
| He's draped in it. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Like, how could he not know that he took that picture? | ||
| So he admitted on... | ||
| He's so smart! | ||
| Well, that's the thing... | ||
| When you listen to him, he's incredibly articulate. | ||
| I love the skill in which he writes and performs things. | ||
| He's a great broadcaster? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| I mean, I was just... | ||
| Keith Orman, that's the whole thing. | ||
| I was a huge fan! | ||
| Yeah, and he's great with sports. | ||
| I mean, he's got this sort of old-schooly type delivery that I enjoy. | ||
| He's a great broadcaster, and you always hear stories about his idiosyncrasies like he's a prick to work with and stuff, and you go, well, fuck, what are you going to do? | ||
| So who cares? | ||
| I don't work with him. | ||
| I want to watch him. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Well, that's the truth with a lot of people that are... | ||
| Apparently, one of the things about being great at something is a lot of it, you're fucking fanatical about it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You get crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| You get completely obsessed. | ||
| And something is imbalanced. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And you're rigid. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Your people skills are out the window because you're so completely concentrated on something else. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| So he apologized. | ||
| He said that Donald Trump was worse than 9-11, and Meghan McCain said, do you really believe that? | ||
| And his big comeback to that was, your father was my favorite political figure of the 21st century. | ||
| And I'm like, really? | ||
| Who was the second? | ||
| Bernie Madoff? | ||
| Are you fucking kidding me? | ||
| John McCain's a warmonger who thrust Sarah Palin on us? | ||
| Who was playing poker while they were trying to decide the fate of lives. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No. | ||
| Do you remember that thing? | ||
| Where John McCain, they were in the middle of... | ||
| What was the exact scenario? | ||
| They were in the middle of some meeting in the Senate, and they were deciding something incredibly important, and they busted McCain playing poker on Syria. | ||
| No fault. | ||
| Syria. | ||
| Yeah, it was about bombing Syria. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Because he's four. | ||
| He doesn't need to hear... | ||
| But look. | ||
| There he is. | ||
| Playing poker. | ||
| War games. | ||
| McCain caught playing poker on iPhone during Syria debate. | ||
| Just fucking imagine... | ||
| The type of person that could do that. | ||
| You're in the middle of talking about dropping bombs. | ||
| That are going to kill people. | ||
| Yeah, they're absolutely going to kill people. | ||
| They're going to come flying out of fucking high-speed jets. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And he's there playing poker. | ||
| This is boring. | ||
| I need to find out if I can get another ace! | ||
| Ace in the hole, baby! | ||
| Up my sleeve! | ||
| Suck on it! | ||
| So this is what I'm... | ||
| And he called Rand Paul a Putin puppet because he was against Ukraine joining NATO. I mean, that's what John... | ||
| That kind of shit John McCain... | ||
| John McCain, you know, there might be... | ||
| I said this at a live show. | ||
| I go, I don't disrespect his service. | ||
| Nobody disrespects his service except the President of the United States. | ||
| Except Trump. | ||
| Which was the craziest thing ever. | ||
| I like people who don't get caught. | ||
| I was like, how the fuck can you say that? | ||
| So much of the shit that he has said just bounces off of him. | ||
| I was at the comedy store the other night, and somebody was trying to say that that Stormy Weathers chick, is that her name? | ||
| Stormy Weathers? | ||
| Stormy Daniels. | ||
| Sorry, sorry, Stormy. | ||
| I thought it was Weathers, too. | ||
| Who the fuck was saying it? | ||
| Who the fuck was saying it? | ||
| I forget who said it. | ||
| But they were saying, oh, she's our Monica Lewinsky. | ||
| And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| Who's our Monica Lewinsky? | ||
| That Stormy Daniels is gonna tank Donald Trump. | ||
| I'm like, you're out of your fucking mind. | ||
| I go, it's gonna go right off his skin like a water on a duck. | ||
| It's not even going to affect him. | ||
| At all! | ||
| He's going to say, fake news, never happened. | ||
| He's going to keep moving, and that's going to be the end of it. | ||
| And he's like, no fucking way. | ||
| He's going to get in trouble for that. | ||
| I'm like, no, he's not. | ||
| It's not going to be anything. | ||
| You don't understand all the things that he's done so far. | ||
| Grab him by the pussy, all these different things. | ||
| It's like Charlie Sheen. | ||
| I read an article once that said, when is the Me Too movement going to hit Charlie Sheen? | ||
| I'll answer that. | ||
| Fucking never. | ||
| You know why? | ||
| Because you can't shame someone who doesn't have any shame. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It doesn't work. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| If someone's not embarrassed, you cannot embarrass them. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I mean, if someone says to you, hey, Jimmy Dore, what are you, a fucking comedian? | ||
| You're like, yeah, I'm a comedian. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| People call me dumb. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm like, I call myself dumb. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's not going to get me. | ||
| That doesn't bother me. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You need something more than that. | ||
| Charlie Shun, what are you, a fucking whoremonger? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, that's what I do. | ||
| It's well documented. | ||
| I smoke crack and I bang whores. | ||
| Any other questions? | ||
| I gotta go bang whores and smoke crack. | ||
| I don't have time for this. | ||
| I have HIV. Gotta go. | ||
| It's not gonna work. | ||
| You know, Charlie Sheen is out there doing terrible things to women. | ||
| Yeah, he pays them. | ||
| That's what he does with all that fucking two and a half men money. | ||
| That's how I always felt about being a comedian. | ||
| Like, I don't play by... | ||
| You don't get to judge me. | ||
| I fucking judge you. | ||
| Whoa, you're very aggressive. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Pointing and shit? | ||
| I never advocated for a war like the Washington Post, New York Times, MSNBC, and CNN. You're going to judge me over some fucking thing I said or did? | ||
| I never advocated for a war. | ||
| I never fired a guy who was speaking out against a war like MSNBC did in the New York Times. | ||
| Who did MSNBC fire? | ||
| Phil Donahue. | ||
| Phil Downey had the number one show on the network at the time, and they fired him because he was against the Iraq war. | ||
| That's your MSNBC. Is that really why they fired him? | ||
| And the first time Rachel Maddow or Chris Hayes says anything that costs MSNBC a nickel, they will be fucking fired. | ||
| Just like, and that's why they don't. | ||
| They don't. | ||
| And they're paid $30,000 a workday. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's what she gets? | ||
| A workday. | ||
| Powerful Rachel Maddow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Do you like her? | ||
| I used to think she was just like Heath Olbermann. | ||
| They were fantastic. | ||
| And then Trump excites their lizard brain and she's lost her mind. | ||
| She's pushing a fucking red scare and McCarthyism. | ||
| And she should be ashamed. | ||
| She should be shunned. | ||
| Do you think that she's doing that rationally? | ||
| Do you think that she is confused? | ||
| I've seen her completely... | ||
| Or do you think that she is being coerced and pushed into that certain direction? | ||
| I think she's being coerced and pushed, but I think she goes along willingly and... | ||
| Because she's getting that 30k a day. | ||
| She's not going to talk out against... | ||
| Just make a t-shirt. | ||
| 30k a day. | ||
| 30k a day, I will. | ||
| And you can have your way. | ||
| I mention it all the time on my show. | ||
| Can I steal that phrase? | ||
| Yeah, it's a good phrase. | ||
| Okay, I think I may make... | ||
| 30k a day and you can have your way. | ||
| The real problem is neoliberalism, Joe. | ||
| The real problem is the system, and they'll never talk about that. | ||
| Well, it's also tribalism, right? | ||
| Anything that opposes the other side must be good, right? | ||
| And anything you can use on them must be good. | ||
| Well, that's what's happening right now with Trump. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And it's disgusting. | ||
| It's like there's a way to oppose Trump, and it's not the way you're doing it. | ||
| In fact, the way they're doing it enhances Trump. | ||
| It makes him more powerful. | ||
| You keep coming at him that, oh, his guy with the battered wife, he gives a... | ||
| Meanwhile, they're spending $160 billion more on bombs that nobody wants. | ||
| Meanwhile, half the country's poor or low-income, 63% of Americans can't afford a $1,000 emergency in the richest country the face of the earth has ever seen. | ||
| All the benefits of this recovery has gone to the upper 1%. | ||
| People haven't had a raise. | ||
| You know, I just saw the AFL-CIO, you know, so like I was telling you, people give me shit because I wouldn't vote for Hillary Clinton, right? | ||
| And I just saw the... | ||
| The AFL-CIO tweeted out last week that the unions have helped give Democrats complete control of government four times in the last three decades, and they have done nothing to help unions. | ||
| And they're saying vote third party. | ||
| They got together with the teachers union and the postal union, and they're like, hey, lesser of evil voting isn't working. | ||
| We have to somehow come up with a third party. | ||
| So they're talking about it now. | ||
| So people who are wagging their finger at me, I go, hey, even the unions agree with me now that we've got to have a third party. | ||
| And if Bernie Sanders would have went with a third party instead of propping up that corporatist warmonger like he did, he could have really changed politics in America. | ||
| If Jill Stein and the Green Party would have got 10 or 15 percent of the vote or even 5 percent of the vote, it would have completely changed politics in America because now the Democrats, they wag their finger at their base and then they move to the right. | ||
| Like Hillary Clinton wagged her finger at the base and then picked Tim Kaine, who was to the right of her. | ||
| Right? | ||
| And so if Bernie Sanders would have went with the Greens and they would have made a showing, now they can't do that. | ||
| They can't dismiss them anymore. | ||
| Now they have to come together in a coalition. | ||
| But she was doing it in a calculated manner to try to get some Republicans that thought that Donald Trump was repulsive. | ||
| Oh no, Hillary Clinton, their whole strategy was, we're fuck over working people and we're going to try to get white-collar Republicans. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's not what your party is. | ||
| There's already a party for those people. | ||
| There's a party that's called the Republican Party. | ||
| You're supposed to be the party of fucking workers. | ||
| And that's why we don't have an opposition party in this country, Joe. | ||
| And we have two parties that are pro-management. | ||
| You know that Nissan? | ||
| Nissan has 49 plants around the world. | ||
| Three of them are not union. | ||
| You know where those three plants are? | ||
|
unidentified
|
United States. | |
| In the United fucking states. | ||
| So we got a broken system, right? | ||
| The problem is the Democrats are bought by the same people. | ||
| They're just a little, you know, and people go, why did the Democrats keep caving? | ||
| Why didn't they stand up against Trump for DACA? They're not caving. | ||
| They're standing up to you, the voter, and they're standing up to their donors. | ||
| Their donors don't want the government shut down for one minute, and that's what they're standing up for. | ||
| They could have stood up for the voters and stood up for DACA, but they didn't. | ||
| They stood up for their donors. | ||
| So it's not like they're spineless. | ||
| They appear spineless because it looks like they're not doing what they're supposed to or they're not, and they're not doing what they said they would do, which is stand up for the people, but they're secretly standing up for their donors. | ||
| They have a steel spine when it comes to their donors, which is why they just gave Trump $160 billion. | ||
| Can I make one last point about Donald Trump? | ||
| So this shows you how they're full of shit. | ||
| When you say Donald Trump is an existential threat to our country and a maniac and he has his finger on the button, and then you vote to give him $160 billion more in bombs, I think you're full of shit when you say he's an existential maniac. | ||
| If you say that this guy is unhinged and you can't be trusted, and then you vote to expand his warrantless wiretapping and spying powers on his own enemies in the country, that's what I know and you're full of shit. | ||
| Because if they really wanted to check Trump, they would check him on the military, the Pentagon budget, and his spying powers. | ||
| They've expanded all that stuff. | ||
| So if he's really a maniac, those motherfuckers are the most irresponsible people in the world giving him all this extra power for the Pentagon and spying. | ||
| But they'd know. | ||
| The only reason they hate Trump is because he ain't part of their fucking club. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh, Jimmy Dore just laid it down. | |
| Now, you're going to get hate mail from people that are Hillary Clinton supporters. | ||
| It's going to come. | ||
| I hope you're ready. | ||
| Yeah, but getting it since 2016. The thing that always killed me about Hillary Clinton more when I would talk to super Democrats, like people that were just completely tribal, they're on the Democratic side no matter what, I'd go, you know, she didn't support gay marriage until 2013. She was the last one! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, there was a sexual harasser on her campaign in 2008, and she didn't fire the fucking guy. | ||
| In fact, she covered for him, and then he went on to sexually harass again in another organization tied to Hillary Clinton, correct the record. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, the problem is, I think, when you're close to her, you find out all the dirty details, what's going on behind the scenes, and it's just a creepy, creepy organization. | ||
| She was such a flawed person for feminists to wrap their flag around. | ||
| She's not the person. | ||
| There was another woman running in that race, and it was Jill Stein. | ||
| I voted for her. | ||
| Nobody cared about her, though. | ||
| It was a weird one. | ||
| It was because Trump, it was exactly what Hillary Clinton wanted, the Pied Piper strategy. | ||
| You can't even entertain not voting for Hillary Clinton because of this existential threat of Trump, and he's such an existential threat, we're going to vote to expand his spying powers and give him a below the military budget. | ||
| Well, it was all this hashtag I'm with her stuff, too, where they wanted to have one female president. | ||
| It would be a historical victory. | ||
| That's why so many people were crying on television. | ||
| I get that. | ||
| Because they were watching an Avengers movie. | ||
| They weren't really involved in the actual political process itself. | ||
| They didn't understand what was happening, and they didn't understand who she really was. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| I mean, from the beginning to the end, if you go and there's just so much evidence. | ||
| You remember that off-camera interview where she was talking about Gaddafi? | ||
| We came, we saw, he died! | ||
| Ha ha ha! | ||
| She's laughing. | ||
| That's a psychopath. | ||
| What kind of a person is that? | ||
| That's a crazy person. | ||
| And now Libya is a failed state. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It's a failed state. | ||
| It's a failed state. | ||
| It's a haven. | ||
| Terrifying place. | ||
| Haven for terrorists. | ||
| Slavery is back. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Did you see that shit? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| On YouTube, you can watch slave trade in Libya. | ||
| That's her success story. | ||
| Yeah, it's horrific. | ||
| But let me ask you a question, Joe. | ||
| One of my big things is the reason why I have a show is because mainstream news media sucks so bad, and the reason why you have this show is because late-night talk shows suck so bad, right? | ||
| Well, they're stuck. | ||
| They have commercials. | ||
| You know, they have these things that they do, and they have tied in production. | ||
| But they would never have this conversation. | ||
| No. | ||
| Someone would come in, Jimmy, Joe, listen, you can't. | ||
| This is not the time for this. | ||
| You guys want to talk about this in your own time? | ||
| It's not the time. | ||
| There's a lot of Hillary supporters on staff, and they're very upset right now, and they feel that you guys are misogynists. | ||
| Did you see Jimmy Fallon? | ||
| No. | ||
| I don't know Jimmy Fallon, and I've only bumped into him, and he's always been a gentleman. | ||
| He's a very nice guy. | ||
| A gentleman and a nice guy, and nothing bad to say about Jimmy Fallon. | ||
| But they did a segment where they had Hillary Clinton on and his writers came out and they all wrote thank you notes. | ||
| And they read them to Hillary Clinton. | ||
| And at first I'm like, this is going to be hilarious. | ||
| And then it wasn't. | ||
| It was actually, sincerely, they were thanking her. | ||
| For what? | ||
| For being a woman and running for fucking bread. | ||
| The fact you guys shot him and left his wallet and his watch there, that was amazing. | ||
| That was a botched robbery, Joe. | ||
| Oh yeah, sure. | ||
| Four o'clock in the morning. | ||
| No one took anything from him. | ||
| He just happened to leak. | ||
| Yeah, she called him a fucking hero. | ||
| Donna Brazile said that that scared her to death. | ||
| She started pulling the blinds in her office. | ||
| She should. | ||
| So now the Washington Post, that's what I wanted to ask you. | ||
| They wrote a whole thing about how anybody who questions Seth Rich is crazy. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| They do that. | ||
| They make you look like you're a fool because it's a conspiracy theory. | ||
| And you say conspiracy theory, conspiracy theorist, and you're a whack job. | ||
| But the Russia thing is one big conspiracy theory. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But just put it down on paper. | ||
| Let's just look at real hard facts. | ||
| Seth Rich was a Bernie Sanders supporter. | ||
| Seth Rich was a patriot. | ||
| Seth Rich, according to Julian Assange and WikiLeaks, which have not been proven to be liars... | ||
| Never had to retract anything they printed. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They've never had to do that. | ||
| He's saying that he leaked stuff to him. | ||
| There are consequences leaking stuff to WikiLeaks. | ||
| Seth Rich was murdered at 4 o'clock in the morning, shot in the back. | ||
| They said it was a boss robbery, but no one took anything from him, and there's never been anyone that's charged with it, and there's no suspects. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know what happened to him. | ||
| But that looks very suspicious. | ||
| Well, you're not even allowed to ask questions because I covered that story one day. | ||
| I covered it one day because that guy Wheeler came out and he was saying he saw the computer and all this stuff. | ||
| So I covered that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And you're a piece of shit. | ||
| You're a conspiracy theorist. | ||
| In that video I did, I literally said... | ||
| I don't know if this is true. | ||
| We're waiting for evidence. | ||
| Unlike the mainstream news media with their Russia bullshit, we're going to wait for evidence. | ||
| I literally said that inside that. | ||
| And then the next day I did another video which debunked that guy Wheeler who was pushing that story because he turned out he was full of shit. | ||
| So what was the response though? | ||
| People still to this day. | ||
| Fuckin' smear me with that. | ||
| They go, oh, you pushed the... | ||
| I go, I covered... | ||
| I would do a new show. | ||
| I covered a new show. | ||
| By the way, why aren't you allowed to ask questions about an open murder investigation? | ||
| Well, not only that, this is a real... | ||
| Look, this is a guy who is a real Bernie Sanders supporter. | ||
| Open Bernie Sanders supporter who worked for the DNC. The DNC absolutely rigged the primary against Bernie Sanders. | ||
| He was aware of this. | ||
| He was there while this was all going down. | ||
| So was Donna Brazile. | ||
| Everyone was aware of it. | ||
| The guy got fucking murdered, After he leaked information to WikiLeaks. | ||
| If you don't think that's a little weird, what are you looking at? | ||
| What delusional rose-colored glasses are you looking at your party from? | ||
| You think you're in some Julia Roberts movie from 1990? | ||
| This is real shit. | ||
| Some guy got killed. | ||
| He was 24 years old. | ||
| He was a young guy who was very optimistic and had this... | ||
| View of the world where he... | ||
| I mean, the guy fucking wore American flag pants and shirt. | ||
| There's a famous picture of him with a beer on. | ||
| He's a patriot in a lot of ways. | ||
| He wanted to be involved in the political process. | ||
| He was very idealistic. | ||
| He was probably shattered by finding out that the party that he was working for was corrupting the democratic process. | ||
| And because I've said this before, you know, I've been accused of helping Donald Trump win by really wacky people online. | ||
| Like, by pointing out all the flaws of Hillary Clinton. | ||
| Like, look, man, you can't ignore that shit because you want one side to win. | ||
| I've talked about all of his flaws, too. | ||
| There's a lot of flawed human beings who run for president, pretty much all of them. | ||
| I mean, it's very rare you have someone who's not flawed, extremely flawed, we're all flawed, but extremely flawed, who wants to be the fucking king of the world. | ||
| It's very rare. | ||
| Well, you know, not to change subjects, but Barack Obama, everyone thinks is the greatest guy in the world, you know, in contrast to Donald Trump, because he was polite. | ||
| He's a statesman. | ||
| He's a very good speaker. | ||
| He was polite. | ||
| At the same time, he let cops crack the heads of peaceful protesters that occupy Wall Street all across the country. | ||
| He said he put on a soft shoe to stand up for unions. | ||
| He fucked over unions in Wisconsin when they took a teacher's union away. | ||
| He opened the Arctic to drilling twice. | ||
| Whenever Shell Oil wanted, he said okay. | ||
| And he only closed it when they didn't want to do it anymore. | ||
| He took us from two wars to seven. | ||
| He cooked out 5.1 million families out of their homes instead of helping them. | ||
| And he made Wall Street whole while fucking over everybody else. | ||
| And he made the Bush tax cuts permanent. | ||
| So what they say is that it looked like it was change on the outside, continuity on the inside. | ||
| Well, the Hope and Change website had to be altered because there was all these things in there about whistleblowers. | ||
| And then he prosecuted them. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But he took it out of the website. | ||
| Right. | ||
| He had all these sections in the website about offering protection for whistleblowers. | ||
| And also, they were like the worst when it came to the press. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Yes, when it came to the press and freedom of the press and people getting in trouble for leaking information, they were the worst. | ||
| The worst, much worse than Bruch. | ||
| They used the Espionage Act to prosecute journalists. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And that's a fact. | ||
| And everyone turned their head. | ||
| You know, Glenn Greenwald used to be a hero on the left until he started telling the truth about Barack Obama, and now he's a pariah. | ||
| So, to the people on, you know, Thomas Frank, I don't know if you know, you would love that guy if you ever met him. | ||
| He wrote that book called What's the Matter with Kansas, which is examining what's wrong with conservatives, and then he wrote a book called Listen Liberal. | ||
| Which came out, I think, two years ago. | ||
| And he is persona non grata on MSNBC, CNN. Nobody will talk to him, because he critiqued the left. | ||
| He stepped out of line. | ||
| There's no room for discourse. | ||
| He can't even get a job in the United States. | ||
| He has to write for The Guardian in England. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| That's a true story. | ||
| So I've had him on my show. | ||
| People love him. | ||
| And he comes out and he tells the truth about the left. | ||
| Thomas Frank? | ||
| Thomas Frank. | ||
| And he's got a great sense of humor, too. | ||
| And he's real personable. | ||
| And he's an academic, but he doesn't talk like one. | ||
| And his book is, Listen Liberal is what radicalized me to not be able to vote for Hillary Clinton. | ||
| It opened my eyes to all the, you know, people still fucking blame Ralph Nader. | ||
| It's just unbelievable. | ||
| Like, you're allowed to participate in fucking democracy. | ||
| And Hillary Clinton was the only candidate in the history of politics who wasn't expected to garner votes by campaigning. | ||
| You just were supposed to owe her your fucking votes. | ||
| If she doesn't have the votes, you're supposed to go get the fucking votes. | ||
| That's how it works. | ||
| It's the first time ever I've ever seen people... | ||
| She was of poor health. | ||
| It's voter shame. | ||
| She was having a really hard time doing what she was doing. | ||
| Donna Brazile almost wanted to replace her. | ||
| She said in the book, Donna Brazile said her health was so bad, they wanted to replace her. | ||
| That was another thing that I got in trouble for. | ||
| Me too. | ||
| Not in trouble for, but people were saying, like, why do you keep talking about her health? | ||
| Because it's a huge issue. | ||
| And also, I happen to know a lot about brain trauma. | ||
| She had brain trauma, and she passes out. | ||
| They said she was hot. | ||
| She didn't take her coat off. | ||
| Listen, I've been hot many times. | ||
| I go in the sauna all the time. | ||
| I never faint, okay? | ||
| And I don't want to run for president. | ||
| Listen, you can't just fall asleep while you're standing up and be president. | ||
| That's not in the books. | ||
| I have a joke about it in my act. | ||
| I was like, if that was my mom, I'd be like, Mom, you can't be president. | ||
| You can't stand up fast. | ||
| I mean, it's true. | ||
| If Hillary couldn't stood up fast, her eyes would roll back behind her head and she'd fucking crack her head off the linoleum. | ||
| That's just a fact. | ||
| But if you say that, you're a misogynist, you're alt-right, I've been called alt-right for that, like you're helping Donald Trump win. | ||
| You're helping Trump. | ||
| This Seth Rich thing is a real symptom, and the ignoring of that case is a real symptom of what is wrong with this toxic tribalism. | ||
| You can't discuss it. | ||
| Listen, that's crazy that you're even talking about it. | ||
| I can't believe that you talk about it so openly. | ||
| People don't try to discredit you because of this? | ||
| It doesn't matter. | ||
| You can't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do I do? | |
| I'm a cage-fighting commentator. | ||
| Go ahead. | ||
| I'm a pot addict. | ||
| I smoke the pot. | ||
| I got problems. | ||
| Listen, man, I'm not a fucking reputable person when it comes to my political ideologies. | ||
| I mean, I'm just not. | ||
| I'm not that well-read when it comes to politics. | ||
| I have my opinions on things. | ||
| But when it comes to things that are rock solid and clear, like that Seth Rich was murdered and people want to ignore it, I'm like, what the fuck do you think happened? | ||
| There has to be some sort of a disconnect here. | ||
| When a person is giving information to WikiLeaks that exposes corruption inside the very organization that's responsible for the fucking Democratic Party, and he gets murdered, and you're like, oh, the conspiracy theories. | ||
| No, he got murdered. | ||
| There's no conspiracy. | ||
| It was a botched robbery. | ||
| Says who? | ||
| Says who? | ||
| How come his wallet was there? | ||
| How come his watch was there? | ||
| How come they didn't take his phone? | ||
| What the fuck are you talking about that I'm a conspiracy theorist when I just tell you the facts? | ||
| And this WikiLeaks thing with Julian Assange is the craziest shit ever when he said there's consequences to sharing information with us. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And everybody's like, he works for Russia now. | |
| He works for Russia. | ||
| He was the darling of the left when Obama was in office. | ||
| So isn't that amazing? | ||
| So Julian Assange, he's just a great news guy who's tough as nails. | ||
| Who dances creepy and might have fucked some girl while she was asleep. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whatever, whatever. | |
| He can't leave! | ||
| He's stuck in the Ecuador Embassy forever! | ||
| By the way, that case was so fucked. | ||
| So fucked! | ||
| So fucked! | ||
| He's been so fucked, and it's because the CIA wants him so bad, and they control everybody, and now they have influence over Ecuador, and they're trying to fuck, they're trying to get a Halliburton guy to be their new, anyway. | ||
| They might just blow up that place. | ||
| Oh, it was a gas leak! | ||
| No doubt, right? | ||
| I wouldn't be surprised if shit like that happened. | ||
| If more stuff comes out, like the Seth Rich stuff, the amount of people, and this is where I leak any conspiracy theories, the amount of people connected to the Hillary Clinton organization, to the Clinton Foundation, to Bill Clinton, the amount of people that have been iced is stunning. | ||
| Some of them are bullshit and coincidental, and you know people, and they're in a weird job, and people get killed. | ||
| There's a lot of people that have been killed. | ||
| A lot. | ||
| But don't you think, what I love when they talk about the Uranium One story like it's debunked. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Bill Clinton got a half a million dollars put directly in his pocket from a Kremlin bank. | ||
| Directly. | ||
| And then $142 million flowed into the Clinton Foundation. | ||
| And it was a bunch of motherfuckers surrounding a nuclear deal because they wanted to do charity. | ||
| So what's the argument that it was debunked? | ||
| They say, oh no, she was only one of nine things that had to sign off. | ||
| There was all these other agencies that had to sign off on it, and this and that. | ||
| It's all bullshit. | ||
| That was all influence. | ||
| Someone gave your Clinton Foundation $142 million. | ||
| That's to buy influence, and a half a million dollars in the Bill Clinton's pocket directly. | ||
| It's because they like how he talks pretty English in Russia? | ||
| Are you fucking kidding me? | ||
| So it's all bullshit. | ||
| So people go, oh, it's debunked. | ||
| It's not debunked. | ||
| It's not fucking... | ||
| You tell me why they gave $142 million anonymously to a fucking Clinton foundation. | ||
| That is such bullshit. | ||
| They're so corrupt. | ||
| If you believe Trump is corrupt by doing deals with oligarchs, this is Dylan Radigan talking. | ||
| You also have to believe that Hillary Clinton did arms deals around the country while personally enriching herself, and Barack Obama is paid off by the... | ||
| Wall Street and the health insurance companies and Big Pharma, so we don't have a functioning money sector or a healthcare sector. | ||
| It's hard to believe one and not believe the other two. | ||
| That's what Dylan Rattigan says, and I believe that fucking guy. | ||
| He's an award-winning journalist, and he said, if you believe Trump is corrupt in this, and he goes, and it's easy to believe, it's all no fucking problem, but you also have to believe this. | ||
| You have to believe Hillary Clinton did arms deals all around the world, enriching herself to the tunes of millions of dollars. | ||
| The same thing with Barack Obama. | ||
| You can't believe one and not the other. | ||
| So my whole point is, when people try to pretend that Trump is the problem, they're missing the problem. | ||
| The problem is the neoliberal system that gave us Trump, that renders 63% of the population without enough funds to handle a $1,000 emergency in the richest country in the world. | ||
| That's the problem, Joe. | ||
| And that's what people are... | ||
| If you think it's Trump, Trump is a symptom of a bigger problem. | ||
| I don't even think that guy wants to be president. | ||
| He doesn't. | ||
| I think he fucked up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think he was running to build up his brand and like, shit, I'm biting tires now. | |
| Bumpers taste like shit. | ||
| These people hate him so much, they want to impeach him. | ||
| One of my favorite parts of the election process was when he was saying, I gave you money, I gave you money, I gave you money. | ||
| So again, I would say stuff... | ||
| I was like, God, who would have thought it would be Trump to fucking out these people? | ||
| I know. | ||
| Because he did. | ||
| Well, you know, when Obama was mocking him at that press junket thing, what is that thing? | ||
| Yeah, it was at the war correspondence dinner. | ||
| Yeah, the correspondence dinner. | ||
| When he was mocking him, he said, one thing that I am that you'll never be? | ||
| President of the United States. | ||
| And you see Trump sitting there going, oh yeah, motherfucker? | ||
| And like, that very well could have been like, he was talking about running for president in the 80s, right? | ||
| But he never did. | ||
| Never did. | ||
| Thought about it in the 2004 election, never did. | ||
| But that fucking straw snapped. | ||
| And he did it! | ||
| And we're on! | ||
| He did it! | ||
| Now he's in. | ||
| Do you think that it's a good thing to have someone as fucked up as he is, like, in terms of, like, how we view a president? | ||
| In terms of, like, all the grabbing by the pussy and the paying off a hundred women, all the crazy shit and all the lies. | ||
| Like, he gets caught in lies all the time. | ||
| So you tell me what's worse. | ||
| Donald Trump says, grab him by the pussy, or Barack Obama says, I'm going to fix everything for you, and then he kicks your family out of your house, 5.1 million families out of their house, while making Wall Street whole. | ||
| And then when he comes back into public life after retiring, the first thing he does is give half a million dollar speeches to banks. | ||
| You fucking tell me what's worse. | ||
| Is that what he's doing now? | ||
| That's what he did, yeah. | ||
| When he first went windsurfing with Branson, and then he came back and he gave speeches to the Carlyle Group and some other people. | ||
| I had half a million bucks a crack. | ||
| Well, he needs to buy shit. | ||
| And Chris Hedges says, which is why I love Chris Hedges. | ||
| He was a guy who told the truth about the Iraq War, and the New York Times fired him for it. | ||
| Which is why the New York Times, you can't fucking believe that. | ||
| You can't listen to these establishment newspapers when they talk about war. | ||
| Right? | ||
| So, no, I fucking forgot what I was saying. | ||
| God damn it. | ||
| Obama coming back into office. | ||
| So Chris Hedges says they steal right out in the open now. | ||
| They don't even try to hide it. | ||
| And that's what that is. | ||
| Well, that was one of the funniest things about the Bernie Sanders-Hillary Clinton debates. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's like... | |
| Why don't you release the transcripts? | ||
| Release the transcripts! | ||
| That must have been some kind of a speech. | ||
| $600,000. | ||
| I'd love to hear what you had to say. | ||
| That fucking Debbie Wasserman Schultz. | ||
| Yeah, brilliant stuff. | ||
| We're so fucked up in this country, Joe, that we nominate the most repulsive neoliberal corporatist warmonger in the history of the Democratic Party. | ||
| The most unpopular nominee ever. | ||
| She loses to a fucking game show host that doesn't even want to be president. | ||
| And what do we do? | ||
| We blame another country. | ||
| We blame another country! | ||
| Talk about not wanting to examine the system that gave us. | ||
| And that's all they'll talk about is blaming another country. | ||
| And what is the big news of the week that we really concentrate on? | ||
| His hair flopping off in the breeze in France. | ||
| His hair opens up and you see the back of his head. | ||
| I admit I did a video on that. | ||
| Look at the comb over. | ||
| Look at the comb-over. | ||
| Look at it! | ||
| It's right there. | ||
| Well, we all knew. | ||
| But it was dramatic the way it blew. | ||
| It was dramatic the way it blew open. | ||
| It was like a wing opened, right? | ||
| It was like you seeing something you're not supposed to see. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Like up a skirt. | ||
| It was like his head had an ass. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I heard someone say that, yes. | ||
| That's a good way of looking at it. | ||
| Like, his head was mooning us. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| And by the way, people are going to mistake everything I'm saying for defending Trump. | ||
| Why wouldn't he shave his head? | ||
| Take it from a guy who's got his head shaved. | ||
| Donald. | ||
| Now, how long ago did you shave your head? | ||
| Because I don't remember you having... | ||
| It's like you in my head. | ||
| 2011, maybe, I think? | ||
| So, like, when I met you in 2004, whenever that was... | ||
| I just remember you as being bald, even though you weren't, obviously. | ||
| Now, in my head, that memory is... | ||
| Yeah, I do, too. | ||
| I look at pictures of me from Fear Factor, and I'm like, oh, I had hair. | ||
| I don't remember you ever having hair. | ||
| Isn't that funny? | ||
| It was hanging on, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was starting to go. | |
| But you're one of those guys who can pull it. | ||
| I couldn't pull it off. | ||
| You could pull it off. | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| You think you couldn't until you do it, and then you realize. | ||
| It's nonsense. | ||
| And some guys can do gray hair, too. | ||
| I can't do gray. | ||
| I fucking look. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Can't do it? | ||
| I have to dye my hair all the time. | ||
| But when you let your hair grow gray, you have that aura of, you know, distinguishedness. | ||
| You're a distinguished gentleman. | ||
| You've aged and learned. | ||
| Yeah, I don't need it. | ||
| No, you don't want to die. | ||
| Fuck that. | ||
| I don't want to die, and I don't need to be distinguished. | ||
| I want everyone to think I'm the... | ||
| You know, Jerry Seinfeld, when he was getting an award... | ||
| He said, I don't like doing this. | ||
| I don't like getting awards. | ||
| I'd rather be standing in the corner making fun of the guy getting an award. | ||
| And that's exactly how I feel. | ||
| Yeah, that's me too. | ||
| I don't want an award. | ||
| I don't want to be in your club. | ||
| I don't want to, you know. | ||
| So what do you think about the Washington Post is owned by Jeff Bezos, the richest guy in the world. | ||
| He's fascinating to me. | ||
| And he sits on a Pentagon board, and he has a $600 million deal with the CIA, and he runs the paper of notes. | ||
| Wait, wait, wait. | ||
|
unidentified
|
$600 million deal with the CIA? Yeah, which is like something twice as what his papers were. | |
| Is that what Amazon Alexa's doing? | ||
| Amazon Alexa's just gathering up information on everything you do? | ||
| Yes, it is. | ||
| That fucking thing bothers the shit out of me, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, it's not good. | ||
| Jamie and I were just talking about that new Apple Home thing, which has the most amazing microphones. | ||
| Jamie was saying that while the music is blaring, you can say, hey Siri... | ||
| Just real quiet. | ||
| Hey Siri, why don't you suck my dick? | ||
| Siri's like, I can't do that, sir. | ||
| Details about the CIA's deal with Amazon. | ||
| $600 million computing cloud built by an outside company is a radical departure from the risk-averse intelligence community. | ||
| So now they're in bed with the Washington Post, or Jeff Bezos, and now he also sits on a Pentagon board. | ||
| He's got so much money. | ||
| He's fascinating to me, because how do you keep going when you have $105 billion? | ||
| What's getting you up in the morning? | ||
| So he's a megalomaniac. | ||
| Yeah, it must be. | ||
| How do you accumulate more wealth than any person in the history of the world? | ||
| That means kings, queens? | ||
| That's not necessarily true. | ||
| The reason why is we don't count the same kind of money that the oligarchs have. | ||
| Like, especially people that, first of all, people have said that it's very possible that Putin is the richest man alive. | ||
| Because they're not counting how much money Putin has stolen from all the various companies that he's just sort of absorbed. | ||
| And that he owns all that stuff. | ||
| But also we don't count all these kings and these princes in the Middle East. | ||
| They're not public people. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So let's say of all the people we can count, he's the richest guy. | ||
| A billionaire friend of mine, who's a legitimate billionaire, Told me that it's entirely possible that some of these guys are trillionaires. | ||
| Some of these Middle Eastern guys. | ||
| He's like, you've never seen wealth like this. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Do you know in the United Arab Emirates, they make it rain every week? | ||
| Once a week, they make it rain. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| They seed the clouds. | ||
| Really? | ||
| They make it rain. | ||
| Yeah, because they're in the desert. | ||
| And they're like, eh, I don't like this. | ||
| I like it to rain. | ||
| So they fucking put all that shit that they have to put into the sky to make it rain, which they've been doing forever, cloud seeding, but insanely expensive. | ||
| But they do it... | ||
| Once a week. | ||
| 52 times a year it rains there. | ||
| So do you see a problem with the richest guy in the world owning the political paper of note and being in bed with the CIA and he's on a Pentagon board? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, it's all spooky. | ||
| It's like some kind of Orwellian fucking nightmare. | ||
| Well, he's got so much money. | ||
| And you can't criticize them in the paper. | ||
| The people who write for that paper aren't going to fucking criticize them. | ||
| The Washington Post can't write anything bad about it. | ||
| I couldn't imagine they would even dare. | ||
| One guy wrote something bad about Amazon in the Huffington Post. | ||
| He got disciplined. | ||
| There was a guy who was a writer for the Washington Post, wrote something in the Huffington Post that was critical of Amazon, and he got disciplined at the Washington Post for doing that. | ||
| So that's the world we live in. | ||
| And then we have the government. | ||
| If you ever try to tell about a crime inside the government, then the government will use the Espionage Act to crack down on you. | ||
| So again, we live in an oligarchy, Joe. | ||
| Our democracy has already been taken from us. | ||
| So you know that this isn't a democracy. | ||
| They've done studies. | ||
| This is provable. | ||
| Was the thing about, from the Huffington Post, but was it valid? | ||
| Was it a valid criticism? | ||
| What was it about? | ||
| He criticized about how Jeff Bezos treats his workers. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| That has been an open area of discussion. | ||
| I've talked to someone who actually worked there, and they were saying that they get a countdown. | ||
| So say an order comes in. | ||
| They literally have a countdown on their tablet. | ||
| And the countdown says, you know, like, I don't know what the amount of time is, but you have to run and find that fucking product and get it in the box and get it shipped out inside a very small window of time. | ||
| He goes, so I'm literally running. | ||
| I go, you run? | ||
| He goes, yeah, you literally run, because if you don't meet your countdown, he goes, you can only, like, get away with that for a certain amount of times, then you get in real trouble. | ||
| So they also have these new things, the wrists, the bands that they've just developed. | ||
| They shock you like a dog. | ||
| They shock you. | ||
| No, were you serious? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was joking. | ||
| Oh my god, I'm sorry. | ||
| They fucking shock you? | ||
| He'll pull it up. | ||
| They'll vibrate, and if you're moving the wrong way, it'll shock you back. | ||
| It'll shock you back to the right way. | ||
| Yeah, but does it hurt, or is it like, have you ever driven a new Cadillac? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The new Cadillacs, if you go too close to the side, it gives you like, zub, zub, zub, zub, zub. | ||
| It gives you like a little feeling. | ||
| Amazon Patton's wristbands designed to track and steer employees' movements. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| So, Jeff Bezos, it's been reported, which is true, is that he would rather... | ||
| That guy's not running. | ||
| Run! | ||
| I won't get my shit in a day! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Run! | |
| So now there's a couple different fixes for this, the problem of this. | ||
| Robots. | ||
| One of them would be unions, right? | ||
| So I'm like, my whole thing is, you know, why can't we unionize Amazon? | ||
| Why can't we unionize Walmart? | ||
| I know they make it hard. | ||
| Walmart literally shut down their meatpacking in Texas because the meatpacking group, they unionized in Texas. | ||
| They, fuck it, we're not going to sell meat anymore in Texas. | ||
| That's how we'll fuck over the union. | ||
| So, but we got to figure out a way to get unions in there. | ||
| There's another thing, you know, Teddy Roosevelt was a trust buster, which was, he was a monopoly buster. | ||
| You know, 50% of all online purchases go through Amazon.com in the United States. | ||
| 50%? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, 51% of households in America have Amazon Prime. | ||
| Only 49% have a landline. | ||
| So more people have Amazon Prime in the United States than have a fucking landline. | ||
| What? | ||
| Is that real? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| So Teddy Roosevelt would come along and go, we've got to break this company up. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| He would say, this is... | ||
| But first of all, Jeff Bezos, because he owns the paper, he got the... | ||
| Trump was right when he said he's there to get the tax in his favor, because he was able to go around and hollow out economies of Main Street, little small towns all around, because he didn't have to pay taxes, the income tax, for Amazon. | ||
| And so the brick-and-mortar places did. | ||
| He closed them down by undercutting them, right? | ||
| And now he's opening up brick-and-mortar stores. | ||
| He closed out all the Barnes and Nobles and the Borders books, and now he's opening up Amazon bookstores. | ||
| Did you know that? | ||
| No! | ||
| Yes! | ||
| Amazon bookstores, 64%. | ||
| 64! | ||
| There you go. | ||
| 64! | ||
| It's even up higher than from what I looked. | ||
| I have Amazon Prime. | ||
| Now, how many of those people use it for television? | ||
| This is my question, because I know that Amazon started to make, apparently, some very good shows, but I don't hear anybody talking about watching them. | ||
| Like, apparently, Billy Bob Thornton has a really good show on Amazon. | ||
| And I know there was that Jeffrey Tambor show that got tanked. | ||
| Do you know that's an interesting Me Too story? | ||
| The Jeffrey Tambor one? | ||
| Because he was playing a transvestite or transgender person. | ||
| And there was people, and he's not transgender, and there was people on the show apparently that were very upset that a non-transgender person was playing a transgender person. | ||
| Well, it's acting. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, they didn't like that. | ||
| And there was a lot of internal... | ||
| Dispute because of that, which may or may not have led to the accusations. | ||
| I used to be much harder on transgender. | ||
| When I say harder on transgender, I mean a boner. | ||
| No, I mean... | ||
| I used to make jokes about them because I didn't understand. | ||
| I didn't understand it was a real thing. | ||
| I thought it was just guys fucking having fun. | ||
| Well, some of it is. | ||
| We all like to fucking feel a little weird or whatever. | ||
| I go, but, you know, I don't go out in public. | ||
| But then I realized this is an actual thing with a lot of people that they're actually born to have the different feeling than their outside. | ||
| Then I realized it was a thing, and so now I don't do that anymore. | ||
| It's gender dysmorphia. | ||
| There's definitely people that have issues in their mind where they wish that they were a different thing than what they are. | ||
| I think the thing that concerns me more about transgender people than anything is this acceptance of using hormone blockers for young children. | ||
| And I just think that is fucking insane. | ||
| And this is something that the liberal progressives are pushing at an alarming rate. | ||
| It's a terrifying idea. | ||
| You know, there's plenty of discussion about this online. | ||
| There's plenty of people that think that age six is a fine year to start this. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| We've had people on the podcast who infiltrated this transgender group, and we're talking about their kid. | ||
| Their kid identifies with a girl. | ||
| But the kid is six, is too young to start. | ||
| My knee-jerk is it's too young. | ||
| They were saying, no, it's not. | ||
| Studies show that that's a good time. | ||
| They're just horse-shitting. | ||
| They want more people to do it so that they feel better. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| You ever met a married guy that wants you to get married? | ||
| Because they're fucking miserable as shit. | ||
| I don't want to call anybody out, but famous guy. | ||
| Have a conversation with a famous guy. | ||
| He's telling me how great it is to be married. | ||
| Mel Gibson. | ||
| Because his wife yells at him, tells him what to do, and all this shit, and he gets things done this way. | ||
| And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| He's now divorced. | ||
| I'm married. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| This is many years ago. | ||
| This guy was fucking miserable, but he was trying to tell me that it's a good thing to be married because when you're married, you have to answer to someone and that someone tells you what to do. | ||
| I go, what? | ||
| He was telling me that his wife calls him a fucking asshole and it makes him... | ||
| I go... | ||
| I go, no, my friends don't call me an asshole. | ||
| If one of my friends calls me a fucking asshole, I made a huge mistake. | ||
| That's like living married to your football coach. | ||
| Who wants to do that? | ||
| Fucking throwing buckets of Gatorade on your head. | ||
| The whole thing was ridiculous, but it was literally, there's a misery loves company thing that happens. | ||
| So people who are married want you to be married, too. | ||
| Now, I'm not saying that's absolutely what's going on with people who are transgender, but they're most certainly in support of more people doing it. | ||
| And I don't know if that is why they would lean towards having six-year-olds take hormone blockers, but if you criticize that in any way, you are thought to be transphobic. | ||
| And this is a real issue today, where people are bringing this up over and over again. | ||
| I don't know why anyone would think that it's a good idea to take a six-year-old and put them on hormone blockers when they don't know what the fuck is going on with the world. | ||
| Their body is changing. | ||
| They're going through all this growth and development and for you to chemically hijack that for an ideology seems to me as an outsider to be fucking insane. | ||
| But to talk about it, you run the risk of being thought of as being transphobic. | ||
| It's a very strange time to discuss things. | ||
| Because you can't have an opinion about it because, oh, you're a cisgendered white man with all sorts of privilege. | ||
| Look at you, you macho piece of shit. | ||
| Yeah, people like to, oh, they'll say you're mansplaining. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It's like, well, I'm a guy and I have an opinion, so I'm not allowed to have that opinion ever. | ||
| I mean, I understand there's a time and a place to say mansplaining. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| But I don't think there is. | ||
| There's a time and a place to say that someone is talking down to people. | ||
| If they happen to be a man, that's fine. | ||
| But the problem with the term mansplaining is anytime a man is correct, if a woman is saying something that's incorrect and a man corrects her, he's mansplaining. | ||
| Well, that's ridiculous. | ||
| Too often it's turned into that. | ||
| Just like I said, the hashtag MeToo, we're all against sexual harassment at work, but we're not for puritanism. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| So it's people hijacking certain things. | ||
| I think that what's going on with hashtag MeToo and a lot of things in this society is we're undergoing a radical cultural change, and it's brought about by information. | ||
| I think we are way more aware of each other's feelings, way more aware of what's okay, way more aware of what we're willing to tolerate and what we're not willing to tolerate. | ||
| And if you go back to the 1930s and the 1940s and watch old films where people would smack the shit out of women and rape them and do all kinds of crazy stuff, and it was thought to be normal. | ||
| Those are the heroes. | ||
| The heroes would backhand a woman right across the face. | ||
|
unidentified
|
John Wayne! | |
| Yes! | ||
| John Wayne would do that. | ||
| Remember when he... | ||
| How about... | ||
| What's the guy? | ||
| I forget his name. | ||
| But he took the grapefruit right in her face. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Normal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What was that guy? | |
| Was that John Wayne or was that... | ||
| No, that's the short guy. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| Oh. | ||
| I can't think of it. | ||
| Mickey Rooney. | ||
| No, the other short guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was it? | |
| No, Jim Cagney. | ||
| James Cagney. | ||
| Cagney, yes. | ||
| I can't believe I couldn't think of his name. | ||
| Yeah, I couldn't either. | ||
| Yeah, you did, though. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Oh, here it comes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Give me some volume, see? | ||
| Let me hear some volume. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What a dick. | |
| She doesn't even say anything. | ||
| She says that and he ticks the grapefruit right in her face. | ||
| Wow, that is kind of a... | ||
| That's a dick move. | ||
| It's a ruthless fucking scene. | ||
| Horrible. | ||
| Now try to do that today. | ||
| Maybe, you know, have some... | ||
| You know, name a guy who's a... | ||
| Ryan Gosling. | ||
| Bradley Cooper. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| One of those guys. | ||
| One of them handsome fellas. | ||
| Do it to some beautiful, young... | ||
| Name a girl who's a good... | ||
| Emma Stone. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| Sucks a grapefruit in her face. | ||
| People be like, what the fuck movie is this? | ||
| And then she just kind of cries. | ||
| She doesn't even react. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Oh! | ||
| Men beat the fuck out of women back then. | ||
| It was normal. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Horrible. | ||
| So I think what those things represent, obviously it's fiction, right? | ||
| But what it also represents is what was acceptable culturally to witness in a film. | ||
| That is not acceptable culturally to witness in a film now, especially from the fucking hero of the show. | ||
| I think today we're more aware than ever before of how people feel, of how people think, of what's acceptable, what's not, and what was wrong with the way people used to behave. | ||
| Whereas it was just, we were operating on momentum in the 30s and 40s and 50s and 60s and 70s. | ||
| The internet came along and people were just sharing information at this unprecedented pace. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I just found out about John Lennon. | ||
| What about him? | ||
| That he admitted to beating his girls, girlfriends. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Maybe he heard Yogo Arno sing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You gotta give him a break. | |
| But it was when he was younger and he said, you know, I have to make up for the things. | ||
| I can't deny what I did. | ||
| I have to make up for it. | ||
| I was like, wow, you don't want to hear that, right? | ||
| I heard that about Hendrix, too. | ||
| No! | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| See if you can find that. | ||
| Dude, the Hendrix story is very disturbing because Hendrix might have been murdered. | ||
| It's very possible that Hendrix was murdered. | ||
| You don't have to imagine John Lennon beat women and children. | ||
| It was just a fact. | ||
| Beat children? | ||
| Who did he beat? | ||
| What children? | ||
| Terrible things the famous asshole did during his life. | ||
| Is that written by a woman? | ||
| Hashtag me too. | ||
| Yeah, it was a different time. | ||
| I bet a lot of people did terrible things back then. | ||
| I guess one of his kids he wasn't nice to. | ||
| I forget which one, Julian or the other. | ||
| Anyway, you know Steve Martin's dad. | ||
| Did you ever read his book? | ||
| He talked about how his dad hit him a little too hard one time when they were never friends after that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| And did you get hit as a kid growing up? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, I didn't get hit, but my mother did. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Your mother got hit? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Yeah, my mother got hit by my dad, but then she left my dad. | ||
| Oh, and your dad didn't hit you? | ||
| Yeah, completely made up. | ||
| Jimi Hendrix, Australian girlfriend, Savage's new film, which shows Rockstar beating up her character. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| All my side's inaccuracy has been criticized by Hendrix's friends, his former girlfriend, disgusted by scenes depicting domestic violence, never consulted her about her portrayal. | ||
| Okay, so that might not be true. | ||
| But there was another... | ||
| Someone had said that there was a situation where Jimi was in the other room and he hit his girlfriend. | ||
| Like someone was talking about it from a first-person perspective. | ||
| I don't know if that was the girlfriend. | ||
| The fascinating thing about Jimmy was that he had this gangster manager who had him kidnapped. | ||
| His manager had him kidnapped so that he could release him, so that he could rescue him, so that he could keep Jimmy on as a client. | ||
| And this is all that came from a really recent book that was one of the gangster guy's bodyguards, like one of the people that worked for him. | ||
| Very fascinating. | ||
| So he was afraid that Jimmy was going to get rid of him as a manager, so he engineered a kidnapping that he could solve, and then Jimmy would feel indebted and bring him on as his manager. | ||
| And this guy who wrote this book, I don't know how much of this is real and how much of it's bullshit, but thinks that they murdered Jimi Hendrix, and then right after that, the girlfriend of Jimi Hendrix was thrown off of a roof. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, and they said she committed suicide, but he says they threw her off a roof, and she knew about Jimmy's murder. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Stranger things have happened than that, Joe. | ||
| Well, that whole business, in many ways, look at Suge Knight, right? | ||
| That whole business, the music business, has been run by gangsters for a long fucking time. | ||
| Look at Phil Spector, right? | ||
| The guy who shot that woman in the face. | ||
| Like, he used to put guns in people's mouths all the time. | ||
| That business was run by gangsters forever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's crazy. | |
| So, the idea of Jimi Hendrix's manager being a gangster is not outside the realm of possibility. | ||
| You go back to the Ciro's nightclub days, where the Comedy Store is today. | ||
| That was run by Bugsy Siegel. | ||
| It was a fucking gangster joint. | ||
| That's where they had musicians play, and fucking Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin play there. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| That was run by fucking murderers. | ||
| That was the one reason why everybody was willing to believe that the Comedy Store was haunted. | ||
| If you look at the haunted dictionary of places or the directory of places, the comedy store is one of the top places on the list in Hollywood. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| I'm pretty sure it's haunted. | ||
| That's the fucking main room, man. | ||
| I perform there. | ||
| I'm going there tonight. | ||
| I'll be standing right there where that guy is. | ||
| I mean, it's crazy that the store is essentially the same fucking place as it was then. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I believe it's haunted. | ||
| Dude, they killed a shitload of people in that place. | ||
| And that's the front door. | ||
| Oh, look how nice that looks. | ||
| Isn't it amazing? | ||
| Yeah, that's really... | ||
| Now it's all dark and evil. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Meanwhile, I was evil-er then. | ||
| Now we're just telling jokes. | ||
| That was fun that night. | ||
| I haven't done many sets at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles. | ||
| Oh, it's the best. | ||
| It was a blast. | ||
| I really enjoyed that. | ||
| Sam Tripoli, thanks for him bringing me on that show. | ||
| I'm doing his show tonight. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| It's the show tonight. | ||
| It's in the main room. | ||
| The place is the best. | ||
| It's just... | ||
| It's soaked with history. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I smacked my girlfriend in the face with a grapefruit. | |
| Look at them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Cigarettes. | |
| Smoking cigarettes. | ||
| Nobody worked out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nobody worked out. | |
| Everybody looked like shit. | ||
| Look at Ronald Reagan. | ||
| Oh, there's Ronald Reagan! | ||
| Who's the girl? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That's Dean Martin, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nancy Reagan. | |
| That's Nancy? | ||
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's what the picture says. | |
| Really? | ||
| It says Nancy and Ronald Reagan. | ||
| Wow, she got weird looking. | ||
| Jeanie Beeger, Martin. | ||
| Jeanie Beeger? | ||
| That's Dean Martin, right? | ||
| Dean Martin. | ||
| Wow, Dean Martin looked weird, too. | ||
| It's just a weird angle. | ||
| He's probably hammered. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Couldn't keep his eyes open. | |
| So, like, I always wanted to be those guys. | ||
| Like, I wanted to be Dean Martin. | ||
| I wanted to be the Rat Pack. | ||
| I wanted to be Ray Liotta. | ||
| Why don't you be Jimmy Dore? | ||
| You have a good chance of being Jimmy Dore. | ||
| Well, it's hard to find out who that guy is. | ||
| Oh, I see. | ||
| But if you're on the outside, maybe there's a kid right now listening going, God damn it, Jimmy Dore. | ||
| I want to be you. | ||
| And you don't even know who the fuck you are. | ||
| Well, you know, have you ever thought about this? | ||
| I've thought about it like this. | ||
| If somebody would have whispered in my ear when I was 18 years old, you know how I had a lot of anxiety as a kid, like, what am I going to do with my life? | ||
| I had no role models to do anything. | ||
| I grew up in this blue-collar neighborhood. | ||
| I didn't want to do anything anybody fucking did there. | ||
| Me too. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| Same story. | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy, right? | ||
| That's how you become a comic. | ||
| Yeah, and that's how I became a comic. | ||
| If somebody would have whispered in my ear when I was younger, like, hey, this is how it's going to work out, I'd have been a lot more relaxed. | ||
| Yeah, but then you would have made it. | ||
| Probably not. | ||
| You wouldn't have made it. | ||
| No, that anxiety is important. | ||
| The horrible feeling of insecurity, it all pans out because that makes you work. | ||
| Like, you don't want to be comfortable. | ||
| That's one of the things that I... I like to do things that I'm not good at. | ||
| It's one of the reasons why I like to do yoga. | ||
| It's one of the reasons why I like to run hills. | ||
| It's one of the reasons why I do things like archery and bow hunting and stuff like that. | ||
| It's fucking hard to do. | ||
| So it's humbling. | ||
| Jiu-jitsu. | ||
| It's very humbling. | ||
| And in doing these humbling things, you're always insecure. | ||
| You're always struggling. | ||
| You have to somehow or another constantly be in a state of struggle. | ||
| But that doesn't mean you have to be in a state of struggle all day, all your life. | ||
| But you have to understand what that feeling is. | ||
| Because that feeling is the only way you progress. | ||
| It's the only way you advance. | ||
| It's the only way you get better at things. | ||
| You get better at yourself. | ||
| You get better at life. | ||
| You have to go through that all the time. | ||
| It's a muscle that has to constantly be exercised. | ||
| It's like you're talking about doing stand-up, like Jerry Seinfeld saying, take four days off, and you feel it, take five days off, people know it. | ||
| Yeah, that's the same thing with struggle. | ||
| You've got to constantly be engaged in improvement and trying to figure out how to improve things. | ||
| That's how you advance. | ||
| That's how you advance technique. | ||
| That's how you advance thought. | ||
| That's how you advance ideas and bits. | ||
| That's how they progress. | ||
| You have to feel that fucking uncomfortable feeling that everybody wants to avoid. | ||
| Everybody wants to feel comfortable. | ||
| Fuck all that. | ||
| So when I was on the road, you know, when you were talking about how putting together your next special and how you're going to do it. | ||
| Terrified. | ||
| And all you have to go through. | ||
| You know, when I was on the road, I remember, like, even in El Tassel, Texas, I'd be working and I would do two shows and I would go home afterwards to the condo and I would listen to both shows. | ||
| Before I went to sleep. | ||
| Now, I know most guys didn't do that. | ||
| But I just had to do it. | ||
| And it was almost like I was embarrassed to let the other comics know I was listening to my set. | ||
| But it was just like that. | ||
| It's like, I don't want to be stuck here. | ||
| I have some place I want to be. | ||
| And I got to get there. | ||
| And if this helps me get there, I want to get there. | ||
| I want to figure out, how do I get to be like that guy? | ||
| How do I get to be like Jerry Seinfeld? | ||
| How do I get to be like Brian Regan? | ||
| How do I get to be like those people I want to be like? | ||
| And, you know, I just studied them, and I just... | ||
| So it's that whole thing of you have to have a desire to be somewhere that you're not. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that's one way to look at it, but for me, I feel like that takes care of itself if you continue to improve. | ||
| So my thought has always been on the thing itself, like the craft, the bits, the chunks. | ||
| And there's some material from my past I'm embarrassed as fuck about. | ||
| I can't go... | ||
| Like, if I go on YouTube and I see some old thing from 1999 or something like... | ||
| It's fucking death. | ||
| I can't look at that. | ||
| But what I'm concerned with is like what I'm doing right now. | ||
| How do I get that better? | ||
| How do I tighten that up? | ||
| I'm not thinking one day I want to perform at this place and then I'll truly made it. | ||
| That's a trap. | ||
| But what's not a trap is making the work better. | ||
| Like constantly improving the work. | ||
| And since I've been focusing on that, the more I focused on that, the better my act has gotten. | ||
| Oh, yeah, definitely. | ||
| You're right about that's a trap. | ||
| Because, well, why do you think it's a trap when you say, oh, I want to play theater? | ||
| Because you're still you somewhere else with that same stupid act. | ||
| Yes, that's right. | ||
| And then it still bugs you. | ||
| And you think everything's going to be different. | ||
| And what I think fucks people up when they make it is they're like, I feel exactly the same. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And they don't know what to do with them. | ||
| So that's kind of like where I got, right? | ||
| Like, oh, I can do whatever I want, go wherever I want, see... | ||
| And I still feel the same. | ||
| And that's when I started listening to Eckhart Tolle, and I started to try to be present, try to learn how to enjoy the moment more, and the doing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right? | ||
| So when I'm on stage... | ||
|
unidentified
|
The doing. | |
| I'm never more present than when I'm on stage. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Whatever that magic is to be present, it's like when people say they meditate, they have energy. | ||
| I have so much energy after I get off stage, even if it's a shitty show. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because I'm just being present the whole time. | ||
| I'm not thinking about my bills or what happened yesterday. | ||
| I'm just thinking about right this fucking moment. | ||
| And it fuels me. | ||
| And that's why I just want to go back. | ||
| I want to figure out how I can go back to being a comedian. | ||
| Well, you can be. | ||
| I mean, you definitely did it the other night, so you just gotta do it more. | ||
| I'm just pushing myself to get out there more. | ||
| It happens to people where they get a television show, and it happened to me when I got news radio. | ||
| I was doing very little comedy, and I wasn't writing at all, and my acts started to suck. | ||
| I had the same old stupid act that I had for years. | ||
| There was a period of like two years where I didn't write a fucking single joke. | ||
| I would just go up and do the same set. | ||
| I wasn't doing any TV sets, and I just kept bombing. | ||
| And one time I bombed in front of some writers. | ||
| And I realized, like, oh my god, I have to get back to work. | ||
| And then I really started dedicating myself and really started paying attention again. | ||
| I bought a recorder so I could record all my sets. | ||
| I even installed a DAT machine at the Comedy Store. | ||
| I bought it. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Installed it. | ||
| Installed microphones. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I changed the microphone. | ||
| I bought a whole new sound system for the Comedy Store. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So I could start recording my sets and listening to all of them. | ||
| Fantastic. | ||
| That's awesome. | ||
| And now I just use my phone. | ||
| With iPhones, it's amazing. | ||
| But you gotta fucking, you gotta be concentrating on the work. | ||
| That's the thing, man. | ||
| And the more you concentrate on getting it better, and the more you tighten it up, and that's where the real happiness in performing is, is in doing a great job. | ||
| It's not in like the places that you go. | ||
| I still get nervous, like in some places I'll get nervous. | ||
| You know, like I did the theater at Madison Square Garden, that made me nervous. | ||
| I was like, holy shit, I'm performing at the fucking garden. | ||
| But then after the show was over, I was like, well, that was a show. | ||
| It was a normal show. | ||
| It was great. | ||
| Everything was great. | ||
| It went well. | ||
| But it was fucking weird, man. | ||
| Isn't it funny? | ||
| Because you're just mind-fucking yourself. | ||
| It's the same jokes as the same people. | ||
| It's just a different venue. | ||
| So I used to work this club in Chicago called The Funny Firm, which was a 400-seat room right downtown Chicago. | ||
| It was a great room. | ||
| And around the corner was the improv. | ||
| And they made it really hard to play the improv if you lived in Chicago. | ||
| And so I remember I got a shot... | ||
| To do a set there, and I was freaked out. | ||
| I didn't have a good set. | ||
| Of course, so much pressure! | ||
| I came off, and my friend Steve Segrin goes, he goes, it's the same fucking people that are around the corner, Jimmy. | ||
| They're right here. | ||
| It's the same fucking people. | ||
| And I was like, I know he's right. | ||
| I know he's right. | ||
| But I still fall into that. | ||
| But if you went up a week later, you'd probably be fine. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| You did it more often. | ||
| Again, it's the newness of the situation. | ||
| Don't you feel like that's the problem with filming a special? | ||
| You film a special, it's like, here it is, ready, go! | ||
| Ah, the camera's on! | ||
| Oh my god, I gotta get it right! | ||
| Gotta be relaxed. | ||
| Gotta be normal. | ||
| I had one, when I did my hour special for Comedy Central, I thought we'd shoot two, and then we put it together. | ||
| Well, for whatever reason, we only had enough money to shoot one, and I was like, what? | ||
| I shoot four. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| I shoot four, but I could have used the first one. | ||
| You know why? | ||
| Because I knew I had four barrels. | ||
| I knew I had four shots. | ||
| But I did it before when I had two. | ||
| I did Denver, I had two. | ||
| And the first one, a lady heckled me. | ||
| And I was like, oh, no, now I only have one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| Now I only have one. | ||
| It's terrible, right? | ||
| So I'm like, you gotta have four. | ||
| And, you know, four, I was relaxed. | ||
| Like, I did the Fillmore in San Francisco for my last one, and it felt like regular comedy. | ||
| It was normal. | ||
| That's a great place. | ||
| Yeah, that's why I did my hour special, was at the Fillmore. | ||
| It was a really great place. | ||
| Great place. | ||
| But I'd done I've known that place before. | ||
| I was comfortable. | ||
| I love San Francisco. | ||
| I work there all the time. | ||
| So everything just sat right in. | ||
| But I knew I had four shows. | ||
| Like, I feel like too many people put too much pressure on themselves to do one. | ||
| And I always remember about Hicks, when Hicks did Relentless. | ||
| He did it in the UK. And he did one big show. | ||
| And it just was flat. | ||
| It just seemed flat. | ||
| He didn't seem loose. | ||
| It was like he was just going through these motions that he had done before that were funny, but he wasn't connected to it. | ||
| You could feel the tension of doing one show. | ||
| And I had seen him many, many times. | ||
| And I remember I watched it with this girl that I was dating, and she goes, he's really interesting, but he's not funny. | ||
| That's what she said. | ||
| I was like, damn, bitch. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You know, it's tough. | ||
| He's dead, don't you know that? | ||
| How about you shut the fuck up? | ||
| Did you rub a grapefruit in her face? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, a kiwi. | |
| I always thought it was that Bill Hicks, it's hard to capture someone on film as a stand-up. | ||
| It's hard to capture that. | ||
| Like Dennis Miller's Black and White, that was, I think, the greatest example of capturing that. | ||
| But Bill, I just thought it was like, well, Bill's funny in person, but he doesn't transfer to TV that well, because his specials didn't come anywhere close to being how funny he was in real life. | ||
| I think he just never, they never got it right. | ||
| I think they needed to get him at a club. | ||
| Yeah, like Sane Man? | ||
| You ever see Sane Man? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| That captured him. | ||
| Exactly, yeah. | ||
| He did that at the Houston Laugh Stop. | ||
| He did it himself, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| See, that's... | ||
| But when you do that, then you're getting, you know, a bunch of different sets. | ||
| You find the right one. | ||
| And you do it at a comedy club where he's comfortable. | ||
| I think more people should do sets at comedy clubs and film specials at comedy clubs. | ||
| I have a couple of different theories for why, but one of the big ones is when you're at home, you're in a living room. | ||
| It's intimate. | ||
| Your couch, TV's just right there. | ||
| It's not fucking a million miles away on a giant, big-ass screen. | ||
| So it feels weird to watch something on, you know, the big-ass, giant place, 50,000 people, like Kevin Hart did his special. | ||
| I think that it's funny. | ||
| You know, obviously the material's great, great delivery and everything like that, but I think everything is enhanced more with an intimate environment. | ||
| One of my favorite specials that I did, I did at the Comedy Works in Denver. | ||
| It's like, I think it's... | ||
| What is that place? | ||
| It's not even 300 people, I don't think. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| It might be 300. I just saw Judah Friedlanders, and he did his all in the Comedy Cellar, I think. | ||
| Bam! | ||
| Perfect. | ||
| And it was all a bunch of different, over like a couple months. | ||
| So he would just put his camera in the room. | ||
| Oh, great move. | ||
| And he did it in black and white. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| See, if you do that, man, you get it. | ||
| You get the right show. | ||
| Yeah, he did. | ||
| It's like when you're trying to capture one moment, one night, what are the odds that it's going to be perfect? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| There's too much pressure on you. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| I never thought about that, that you're in this big, huge thing and people are watching it in their little room and it makes sense. | ||
| Yeah, I definitely want to do my next special in a club. | ||
| Did you see Dave Chappelle's new Netflix special, the one that he did at the Comedy Store, Belly Room? | ||
| He did two of them. | ||
| He did one at a good-sized place in D.C., which I think was like a couple thousand people, and then he did another one at the Belly Room, which was like 70 people. | ||
| I was there for that one. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was like, wow, this is interesting, man. | ||
| It's so conversational, but when you're at home, it's great. | ||
| Because it's like, he's right there. | ||
| You see the people are literally as close to him as you are to me. | ||
| And then you're right there, too. | ||
| You're in the room with them. | ||
| I'll check that out. | ||
| Intimate. | ||
| You feel it. | ||
| Is it funny? | ||
| It's fucking hilarious. | ||
| The one in DC is genius. | ||
| And then the one in the belly room is great too, but in a different way because it's more like really current event stuff. | ||
| Like he's talking about Louis C.K. There he is up there. | ||
| So it's like Louis C.K. and Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey, who's a big part of the material that he was talking about. | ||
| And it was right after it happened. | ||
| He filmed this in November. | ||
| So it was just a couple of months ago. | ||
| And it was out in New Year's Day. | ||
| I'll check it out. | ||
| Definitely. | ||
| I have Amazon Prime. | ||
| I don't like to brag. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| You and 65 fucking million... | ||
| What is it? | ||
| 64%? | ||
| 64% of the country. | ||
| I wonder how many of those people are watching it on TV, though. | ||
| That's the interesting thing. | ||
| They're using Amazon Prime just for the TV part? | ||
| I mean, how many of them are using the TV part of Amazon Prime? | ||
| Like, how many of them are watching? | ||
| Because I have Amazon Prime. | ||
| I never remember. | ||
| I never used it for TV. I've never. | ||
| Do you still have old-time cable? | ||
| I have DirecTV. | ||
| Oh, so that's old-time cable. | ||
| Sort of, yeah. | ||
| I still have it. | ||
| I like to flip through. | ||
| I like cooking shows, and I like watching boxing. | ||
| Yeah, but sports. | ||
| It's great for live sports. | ||
| Yeah, but I don't watch the footballs too much anymore. | ||
| I did watch the Super Bowl. | ||
| Even though I loved watching New England lose... | ||
| I didn't really... | ||
| The game just doesn't excite me anymore. | ||
| It's just a bunch of fucking millionaires and that kind of... | ||
| You know, once they get younger than you two, it's hard to get excited. | ||
| It was all these different things. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Is that stupid? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I mean, it's only stupid if it's stupid to you. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I mean, it just was a lot of... | ||
| And when I moved out from Chicago to LA, sports just seemed so much less interesting. | ||
| Now, I like watching sports like... | ||
| I like boxing because it's very much like stand-up comedy. | ||
| There's no hiding. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know, you reveal who you are in the ring, right? | ||
| And just like as a stand-up. | ||
| There's no hiding. | ||
| There's no fucking light show or music underneath the fucking dancing girls. | ||
| It's just fucking you and your ideas. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And so that's why I like boxing. | ||
| And I realized, again, it's people that think I'm blowing smoke up your ass, but I don't like to watch. | ||
| I like to watch UFC. I like to watch the fighting. | ||
| But only if you're announcing it, because I like the backstories and all that shit that you give to it that no one else seems to be able to do. | ||
| It just kind of rolls it off of you. | ||
| It just falls out of your mouth. | ||
| Other people, announcers, it's just boring, so I don't watch. | ||
| Well, that's very nice of you, but it's just because I care about it. | ||
| That's all it is. | ||
| Yeah, you can sell. | ||
| It's been a part of my life since I was a little kid, and so for me, it's very important when I'm watching this and explaining what's happening, like, physically. | ||
| Like, to understand the Gracie brothers and what they did. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, that's interesting. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Right. | ||
| That's what heightens everything, you know, when you're watching, and that's why I like to watch boxing, because those guys' stories are always these unbelievable, his mother abandoned him when he was 80, he walked Brazil for three years, and then he started boxing, like, holy fuck! | ||
| You know, so that's like, that's the, and it's a do or die, and it's one-on-one, and that's why I love boxing. | ||
| Well, it's what we were talking about earlier when we were talking about Jay Leno's new show, is that he's actually passionate about it. | ||
| When someone's passionate about something, it comes through. | ||
| When it's real, when it's genuine. | ||
| And if they can articulate it, it comes through. | ||
| And I think if you're not doing something you're passionate about, understand that from watching someone who is doing something like the Jay Leno show or anything along those lines. | ||
| When you see someone, you go, oh, that's that feeling. | ||
| That's that magic. | ||
| That's that thing where someone's like really excited about it. | ||
| Like it's legit. | ||
| Like it's in their bones. | ||
| And if it's not in your bones, man, you better find what is. | ||
| Because you're missing out on, you know, you're only getting to seven. | ||
| Life goes to ten. | ||
| And you're not ever hitting the high spots. | ||
| You know, you might be fine staying at seven forever. | ||
| I've been to ten too many times. | ||
| I like being at ten. | ||
| That's the problem. | ||
| Most people never get to five. | ||
| It's amazing, most people. | ||
| Most people I grew up with and stuff. | ||
| Comedy opened my... | ||
| I grew up on the south side of Chicago. | ||
| I could see the Sears Tower and the John Hancock building, which are the two biggest buildings in Chicago. | ||
| You could see downtown from where I live. | ||
| Nobody ever went there. | ||
| I guess if you grew up in the Bronx, you could see Manhattan, you never went. | ||
| And then comedy kind of opened that up for me. | ||
| I went into those neighborhoods, and I was like, this is awesome! | ||
| I fucking love this city! | ||
| The whole thing, as I said, it was such a heady experience for me, and my whole life was ahead of me. | ||
| No matter who you are, if you kill, if you're a stand-up and you kill, I don't care if you kill at Zany's, it's 150 people, or if you kill at Madison Square Garden, it's still killing. | ||
| It's the same feeling. | ||
| It's 10. It's 10. You hit 10. You hit a joke and boom, and you hear the roar like, that's 10. And there's nothing, you know, my brother, I remember the first time I got a paid gig. | ||
| It was in Wheaton, or Wheeling, Illinois. | ||
| Anyway, it was $50, and I was telling him I had to drive 50 miles to go make $50 to do comedy, which to me was a victory, right? | ||
| Right, yeah. | ||
| And he worked for the power company in Chicago, Commonwealth, and he goes, pfft! | ||
| They'd have to pay me $50 just to drive there, right? | ||
| And I'm like, yeah, but when you get there, you have to go to fucking work. | ||
| When I get there, I'm the center of attention. | ||
| There's a party happening, and I'm the guest of honor, and I'm going to get a blowjob afterwards, which I did that night in the church parking lot. | ||
| It was fantastic. | ||
| Wow, a church parking lot? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| I was like, we're in a parking lot of a church. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Anyway, so that's why I love stand-up comedy. | ||
| It's like there's nothing like it. | ||
| Everywhere you go, you're the guest of honor at a party. | ||
| That's another thing that people probably never totally understand about stand-up that haven't done it, is you become attractive. | ||
| Whereas you're just a guy. | ||
| Oh, right. | ||
| Before. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You're just a guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just a guy. | |
| A normal guy. | ||
| Now you're a guy, and girls are going after you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| And you're like, what is happening here? | ||
| I remember the first time that happened, I was stunned. | ||
| Like, I'd come off stage, I killed, and this girl came right up to me, and she wanted to talk to me. | ||
| I'm like, is this a trick? | ||
| Like some girl in Connecticut, I'll never forget it. | ||
| She put her hand on my chest and she was talking to me. | ||
| You are so funny. | ||
| How long have you been doing this? | ||
| Oh my god, you're hilarious. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're kidding. | |
| And I was like, what is going on here? | ||
| Is this fake? | ||
| Is this girl, what is she going to do to me? | ||
| Is there someone around going to rob me? | ||
| Like what's happening? | ||
| It was so weird. | ||
| Even when afterwards her and I had sex, I was like, this seems fake. | ||
| It doesn't even seem real. | ||
| First time that happened to me, I was working at Zany's. | ||
| Maybe I should. | ||
| Too late. | ||
| And I come off stage, and this woman came up to me, and she says, where are you going? | ||
| I go, I'm going to the bathroom. | ||
| And she says, do you need any help? | ||
| And at that club, there's just one... | ||
| It's not a big bathroom. | ||
| It's one stall, right? | ||
| So you get your own room. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I go, I don't know if my boss would appreciate that or something like that. | ||
| And she says, well, I'm here with the boss's wife, which I don't know if she was or not. | ||
| And so she follows me into the bathroom and gave me a blowjob. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I was like, I just got to, and I had to go up and bring up the middle. | ||
| It was fucking awesome. | ||
| It was, I was, I'm like, this is, I love comedy. - Yeah, it's a weird shifting of roles, you know? | ||
| Yeah, it was. | ||
| And I remember my back hurt at the time. | ||
| I used to have a bad back when I was starting comedy. | ||
| And I remember I had to, like, sit on the sink because I go, my back, and I sit on the sink and she's blowing. | ||
| It was so funny. | ||
| Girls don't get that thing from comedy, though. | ||
| It's a funny thing that Allie Wong has. | ||
| She's like, road pussy is amazing. | ||
| She goes, road dick is... | ||
| I don't want to do her bit. | ||
| I don't want to ruin her bit. | ||
| Yeah, I hear you. | ||
| Essentially, she's... | ||
| Yeah, it's not the same. | ||
| Yeah, I don't want to ruin her material, but yeah, essentially that's what she's saying. | ||
| It's like, it's not a good deal for gals. | ||
| It must be different. | ||
| You know, one time I remember, I have a big mouth and everything, and so when I started comedy, there was this girl, and she was pretty, and I guess I must have told people I'd like to get on, I can't wait to work the road with her so I can fuck her, right? | ||
| That's horrible. | ||
| So people hearing that now today, they're like, Jimmy, you're a piece of shit. | ||
| So I don't even know how I said it or whatever, but I get confronted by her at a comedy club. | ||
| This girl comes up to me, and I didn't know she was going to say it. | ||
| She goes, Hi, Jimmy. | ||
| And I go, Hi, how are you doing? | ||
| She goes, I heard you said you can't wait to work the road with me because you wanted to fuck me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| She goes, did you say that? | ||
| I go, sounds like something I would say. | ||
| And she goes, don't you want to know who told me? | ||
| I go, could be anybody. | ||
| Don't you want to know who told me? | ||
| It's like she ran out of things to say. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| And then she goes, well, why did you say that? | ||
| I go, because you're really pretty and I'm attracted to you. | ||
| And she totally changed. | ||
| She was like, oh, well, that's okay. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Totally changed! | ||
| Yeah, but this is a different era. | ||
| And we're friends till this day. | ||
| But if this happened today, she would write an article for some one of them online rags. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| I would get in trouble for that. | ||
| You'd be a piece of shit. | ||
| But I was a kid. | ||
| I was just starting comedy. | ||
| I didn't know my asshole from a hole in the ground. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I didn't know anything about that. | ||
| And when she said, she goes, why did you say that? | ||
| And I just decided to be honest. | ||
| And I go, because you're pretty and I'm attracted to you. | ||
| She's like, oh, that's okay. | ||
| I think she thought I was saying she was a slut. | ||
| And that's not what I was saying. | ||
| That's not what I was saying. | ||
| And I was saying she's fucking beautiful. | ||
| I would like a chance with her. | ||
| I would like a chance with her. | ||
| That's what I was saying. | ||
| And she took it. | ||
| I was saying she was a whore. | ||
| So that's not what I was saying. | ||
| So she totally... | ||
| That's the only experience I have like that. | ||
| Yeah, it's going to be a weird time if we remove flirting and clumsy attempts at sex. | ||
| There's a lot of that stuff that turns out to be fun. | ||
| It's funny, too, that one thing that you could say to one person is highly offensive, and you could say it to another person is exactly what they wanted to hear. | ||
| It's like, and you really don't know until you say it. | ||
| Until you say it or do it. | ||
| Then you read it written on paper, like, yeah, it sounds terrible, but in the right circumstance, that's the thing to say. | ||
| Nobody wants to admit that. | ||
| Like, I dated this girl once. | ||
| I'll never forget this. | ||
| When it's read back to you in court, it sounds horrible. | ||
| But in the moment... | ||
| Go ahead. | ||
| There was a girl that I dated once, and we were making out, and we were getting into it hot and heavy. | ||
| She grabs my dick, and I said, I want you to get on your knees and suck my cock. | ||
| She goes, I've always wanted someone to tell you that to me. | ||
| No kidding! | ||
| And she drops down to her knees, and she's fucking going at it. | ||
| But when she looked at me, she goes, I've always wanted someone to say that to me. | ||
| I'm like, what? | ||
| I hit the jackpot, baby! | ||
| Come on, seven! | ||
| But if you could say that to some girls, she'd be like, no. | ||
| Like, all right. | ||
| That's the whole thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What are you going to say? | |
| Like, you don't know. | ||
| In the moment, like, I just, like, it was hot and heavy and crazy quick, and I was like, I'm just going to roll the dice. | ||
| Let's just see. | ||
| Let's pull the, let's go for three lemons. | ||
| See what the fuck happens! | ||
| You never know. | ||
| If you don't make any calls, you don't make any sales. | ||
| But this is 1993. Try doing that in 2018. You can get in real trouble. | ||
| I just talked to a guy, and he owns a bar. | ||
| We're talking about Hashtag Me Too, and he says, you know, the thing is that women don't have to hit on men. | ||
| Men are always the aggressor, right? | ||
| And so that causes a lot of problems, you know? | ||
| Like, I'll see a guy with his group of friends, and he'll slink over to try to talk to this girl, and he's nervous, and he says, hey, you want to dance? | ||
| And she'll shut him down, and he'll walk back over, and like, oh, that fucking bitch, you know? | ||
| And that's what's... | ||
| because he's got a saved face, and women don't know what that's like. | ||
| Well, unattractive women do, though. | ||
| I mean, one of the things that you see from the same people, whether it's men or women, is people that are constantly shut down and ridiculed and mocked by the opposite sex become very bitter and angry. | ||
| You see it sometimes from unattractive women who have been shit on by men, and you see it from unattractive men who have been shit on by women. | ||
| They develop this animosity towards the opposite sex, and it's very unfortunate. | ||
| And a lot of it comes from that feeling that you just get from someone. | ||
| When you make it advance, you become vulnerable. | ||
| And look, if you're a guy, not a good-looking guy, and you take a chance at some girl, she's with her friends at a bar, she might mock you openly in front of her friends, and it's ruthlessly painful. | ||
| And she's just not attracted to you. | ||
| She wants to shut down any possibility that you might have in your head. | ||
| You go back over there. | ||
| And this happens time and time again. | ||
| You could easily develop animosity towards women, or develop a very bad association with the opposite sex. | ||
| You see that from women. | ||
| There's a lot of women that I know that have real issues with men, and they're very unattractive. | ||
| And they'll say really gross generalizing things about men. | ||
| They will make these gross... | ||
| Men are this, and men suck, and men aren't funny, and men aren't this, and men are that. | ||
| And then you look at them, and you're like, oh, well, you're obese. | ||
| You're unattractive and your experiences with men have probably largely been of rejection and bad things. | ||
| On top of all the realities of what men are capable of and the horrible things that men absolutely do. | ||
| No denying that. | ||
| But to have this gross generalization about an entire gender. | ||
| Based on what? | ||
| Well, a lot of it is based on their own life experiences. | ||
| Meanwhile, you go to some really attractive girl who's like, go to, you know, fill in the blank, some really attractive girl who's always had men hit on her. | ||
| She might be, oh, men are gross, men are disgusting, I'm just waiting for the right guy. | ||
| She's not... | ||
| Lumping all men into this group, but many women that are unattractive and have a hard time with men have the same response towards men that many unattractive men have towards women. | ||
| It's a real... | ||
| It's a fucking hard roll of the dice to be born in a way that's just without any... | ||
| Doing of your own, completely outside of your control. | ||
| You're just not sexually attractive to the opposite sex. | ||
| So, you know what? | ||
| I didn't realize that men had this kind of anger towards women. | ||
| I didn't realize women had it towards men. | ||
| But porn, it turns me off a lot. | ||
| Most of it is like this anger. | ||
| Oh, like slapping and shit. | ||
| Yeah, like enforcing and jamming the cock and all this and spitting in there. | ||
| I'm like... | ||
| What the fuck is going on? | ||
| I don't know what that is. | ||
| When I have sex, I like to please a woman. | ||
| I like her to be happy and comfortable. | ||
| So that's when I realized, oh, there's a bunch of fucking dudes who hate women and angry, and they get off on humiliating them. | ||
| I don't get off on that. | ||
| Yeah, there's definitely that. | ||
| You know, I had a friend, and he was an unattractive guy, and I watched him go from being, sort of having these idealistic ideas about the one day, he had a girlfriend at the time, and it turned out his girlfriend was cheating on him, and then, you know, he had other girls, and they were trying to get his money, and then he just became this bitter fucking guy. | ||
| Like, over the time that I knew him, he just became a woman hater. | ||
| I mean, straight up woman hater. | ||
| He'd hit on girls, and they would turn him down, and be like, fucking dykes. | ||
| He'd just be angry. | ||
| Like angry at women. | ||
| He associated, and I watched it from afar, he associated women with negative feelings. | ||
| He associated them with rejection. | ||
| He associated them with callousness. | ||
| And I have a friend who's overweight and she feels like that about men sometimes. | ||
| Like men are shit and they're insulting and they're this and that. | ||
| Some. | ||
| Some are. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Some people are terrible. | ||
| Some males and females are terrible. | ||
| But when you're picking, I'm on team penis and you're on team vagina, we've all lost. | ||
| Because you're crazy. | ||
| You're going to align yourself with 150 million people that you... | ||
| How many do you know? | ||
| Do you know 150 of those 150 million people? | ||
| Because that's a lot. | ||
| You probably don't even have an intimate relationship with 150 men. | ||
| So you're going to lump all 150 million into the same group that you're against and 150 million women into the group that you're with? | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| We're humans. | ||
| We're supposed to be on team human. | ||
| And we're supposed to all figure out how to get along. | ||
| But along the way, we're trying to find mates and we're trying to find companionship. | ||
| The reality of that is it is a messy proposition. | ||
| And some people get left out. | ||
| And some people get shoved aside. | ||
| And some people get attacked. | ||
| And some people get diminished. | ||
| And some people feel terrible about the experience. | ||
| And some people aren't good at it. | ||
| And some people are better at it than others. | ||
| And some people use money and influence. | ||
| And some people use their looks. | ||
| And the whole thing is just... | ||
| It's not perfect. | ||
| This is not some... | ||
| Egalitarian adventure. | ||
| So, I never watched Sex and the City, but my wife did. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| She talks about... | ||
| I watched it once because Brian Callen was on. | ||
| I was like, Jesus, Brian. | ||
| Don't give up your days. | ||
| It's definitely a show for women. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| What are you saying? | ||
| Are you a sexist? | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| But my wife says about that show, because it was an honor when she's watching, she's like, you know, these women all got laid and it was all about them wanting to get laid and they had resiliency and they weren't snowflakes and they were... | ||
| Right. | ||
| And these women could fucking run in heels and, you know, all this... | ||
| They were... | ||
| They had grit. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And she's like... | ||
| She doesn't feel that that's what's happening today. | ||
| Well, there's certainly no role models like that, but you know what's really interesting? | ||
| Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall fucking hated each other. | ||
| No kidding? | ||
| Yeah, there was a thing yesterday with Kim Cattrall saying she's not my friend. | ||
| She's never been, I don't want your sympathy. | ||
| Because Kim Cattrall's, was her brother died? | ||
| Someone in her family died? | ||
| And she sent her best wishes, and she's like, she's not my friend. | ||
| She's never been my friend. | ||
| I don't like her. | ||
| And apparently they were just... | ||
| Yeah, and she said, you know, she's a shitty person, and she said all this fucked up stuff about her, like, right after her brother died. | ||
| I was like, Jesus. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| That's what it was? | ||
| Her brother? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, like, the whole thing is just like, oh, so this whole thing about this camaraderie and this union of women all together and fighting against odds. | ||
| Guess not. | ||
| Horseshit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Horseshit. | ||
| People hated each other. | ||
| It's like The Rock and Tyrese in Fast and the Furious. | ||
| They didn't really like each other. | ||
| It's a scam. | ||
| That's fascinating. | ||
| She's married to that Matthew Broderick, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I don't follow that stuff, but whatever. | ||
| That's a good point I think my wife made. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It was a good point that women with grit, yeah. | ||
| I mean, you don't get, what are the role models today? | ||
| You have the Kardashians, you have sex in the city, I mean, what is that, housewives, real housewives? | ||
| How did Kim Kardashian get famous? | ||
| Sucking dick. | ||
| It was a porn tape, right? | ||
| Yeah, she released a sex tape that apparently was engineered by her family. | ||
| That's what I heard too. | ||
| Is that crazy? | ||
| It's not. | ||
| If you see what that lady's done, like how she's organized it, look, and it's been very successful. | ||
| She had a plan? | ||
| Yeah, if you look at it in terms of a financial venture, it's been a windfall. | ||
| It's unbelievable. | ||
| Unbelievable. | ||
| Amazingly successful. | ||
| But chaos, in a sense, they're a type of royalty in a lot of ways. | ||
| No doubt. | ||
| It's like modern plastic royalty. | ||
| Yes, it's the culture of nothing. | ||
| Yeah, culture of fake asses and nonsense. | ||
| But they're talented, I'm sure. | ||
| No. | ||
| No. | ||
| They're talented at doing that. | ||
| I mean, it's not a talent, but they've been wise strategically in keeping themselves out in the public eye. | ||
| I mean, I'm not a Kim Kardashian or Kardashian family hater by any stretch of the imagination. | ||
| I've had a couple of bits about them where I kind of mocked them, but I don't... | ||
| I don't hate them. | ||
| I mean, there's nothing wrong with what they're doing. | ||
| I know a lot of people that are way dumber than them that I don't hate. | ||
| Why don't I hate them because they're famous? | ||
| Like, that doesn't make any sense. | ||
| No, I don't hate them at all. | ||
| I mean, I don't even know them or watch their shows. | ||
| I think Kim is really pretty. | ||
| But I just think what it says about the culture, right? | ||
| So it makes you like, it reminds you, hey, your culture is vapid. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Well, part of our culture is that. | ||
| And I think they came along at an amazing time, the time of social media, where it's just all about likes and butt pictures that have been doctored up by Photoshop. | ||
| The whole thing is really fascinating. | ||
| And then, you know, the father is like, well, I'm not getting enough attention as a guy. | ||
| Fuck it, I'm going to be a chick. | ||
| And then he gets amazing amounts of attention. | ||
| I mean, you could say that I'm being callous, but that's what happened. | ||
| That's what happened. | ||
| That's so funny. | ||
| I never thought of it like that. | ||
| Oh, it's 100%. | ||
| He's a male Kardashian. | ||
| He became a Kardashian. | ||
| That's an amazing way to look at it. | ||
| Dude, I had a bit about it in my last special. | ||
| My last special. | ||
| Oh yeah? | ||
| Did you get in trouble? | ||
| No, I didn't. | ||
| I covered all my bases. | ||
| But it was basically about... | ||
| I can't do the bit, but I'll tell you about it afterwards. | ||
| It's on Triggered on Netflix. | ||
| Go watch it, fuckers. | ||
| Let's wrap this up, Jimmy Dore. | ||
| Hey, listen, man. | ||
| I'm glad we finally got a chance to do this. | ||
| This was really fun. | ||
| Yeah, this was great. | ||
| I'm really glad you invited me. | ||
| Let's do it more often. | ||
| I'm a big fan of your comedy, and I would love to do it again, and hopefully if you could ever come out to Pasadena, check out my show. | ||
| Listen, I'm out in Pasadena all the time, so let's make it happen. | ||
| All right, will do. | ||
| Jimmy Dora, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Jimmy underscore Dora on Twitter. | ||
| You got Instagram, or no? | ||
| No. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| He doesn't need it. | ||
| Grapefruit in your face. | ||
| Bye, everybody. |
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