Feb. 22, 2016 - The Joe Rogan Experience
04:02:49
Participants
| 
| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| And we're live! | ||
| The Dada 5000 fan club is here for its first big meeting. | ||
| Cowboy Cerrone fighting another cowboy, Cowboy Oliveira. | ||
| Olivera, we are live. | ||
| This is a fight companion. | ||
| If you've never heard one of these before, you're like, oh, I'm hoping a podcast is going to talk about space or maybe perhaps birth control. | ||
| No, this podcast is mostly bullshitting. | ||
| Like, we kind of talk about the fights that are happening, but maybe not. | ||
| Edgy Bra is here, a.k.a. | ||
| Eddie Bravo, a.k.a. | ||
| Master of Tenth Planet Jujitsu. | ||
| Holla. | ||
| Thank you for having me. | ||
| This is an honor to be here. | ||
| Ian motherfucking McCall. | ||
| Uncle Creepy in the house. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Holla. | |
| What up, bitches? | ||
| Holla. | ||
| I'm covered in fucking ham grease. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love it. | |
| Yeah, this stuff's good. | ||
| This is from Dr. Chris Ryan. | ||
| It is nice. | ||
| It's really good for you too. | ||
| It's a wild ham that they cure it. | ||
| And then, of course, Brendan Sharp. | ||
| He's here. | ||
| Big Daddy. | ||
| That's his new name. | ||
| Big Daddy. | ||
| Big Daddy. | ||
| That was a few hours ago. | ||
| Straight from the hospital. | ||
| Yeah, so we're for some fights. | ||
| Derek Brunson. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| Who's he fighting tonight? | ||
| He's fighting homeboy, the Brazilian cat. | ||
| Oh, that guy. | ||
| Oh, the one with the nose and the face? | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Oh, he's got good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Really good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| And he's been around for a long time. | ||
| Yeah, he took a long time off the UFC, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He got cut. | ||
| Yeah, I was down in Brazil. | ||
| It's his second stint. | ||
| Yeah, he fought. | ||
| Mark Munoz in his last outing. | ||
| Rear naked choked. | ||
| Marky Munoz. | ||
| It looks like Mark Munoz just does not want to do it anymore. | ||
| We retired. | ||
| Yeah, I'm glad he did. | ||
| Me too, man. | ||
| That guy took some horrible beatings. | ||
| That Machida one, really. | ||
| The wide man, the Machida one. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Mark's issue was, you know, Mark was the captain of our team. | ||
| Mark's issue was... | ||
| I mean, he blew the fuck up between fights. | ||
| He's a Pilipino. | ||
| I mean, we're talking, he was just, I mean, he fought at 185, he'd be 240, 250, but not like cool 240, 250. He was like butter bean. | ||
| What was he eating? | ||
| Everything. | ||
| His feelings. | ||
| His feelings. | ||
| He had depression issues, right? | ||
| It was like part of what was going on in between camps. | ||
| Yeah, like after the Weidman fight, he had super depression issues. | ||
| From the loss? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I mean, the nicest guy on earth. | ||
| There's the lost depression, and there's also the KO depression. | ||
| Very true. | ||
| Like, actual physical depression. | ||
| And the more they're looking into that shit, you know that dude Dave Mira committed suicide? | ||
| Yeah, the BMX guy. | ||
| Legend. | ||
| So sad. | ||
| Two kids. | ||
| Because those BMXers get a ton of concussions, right? | ||
| Slamming their head against the concrete and shit? | ||
| Horrible. | ||
| Horrible shit. | ||
| And they fall from, you know, 30 feet up in the sky, have all that momentum, just whack! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ugh. | |
| Ugh. | ||
| I've had some friends, I've watched people, I've had friends in all those sports and hurt themselves. | ||
| Yeah, they hurt themselves and they become a different person. | ||
| Totally. | ||
| Their brain gets so scrambled, they're just not the same again. | ||
| They get super depressed. | ||
| Yeah, that's a big part of head trauma, is depression. | ||
| Are those guys born without fear? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What is it? | |
| Like those dudes that do crazy BMX stuff and motocross tricks and flips and jumps? | ||
| You can't have any fear, right? | ||
| They think we're fucking crazy. | ||
| That's the fucked up part. | ||
| I've spent my whole life knowing a lot of these kids. | ||
| And one of my buddies, same as me, has a couple of kids, his wife, and won a couple of X-Game gold medals. | ||
| And he's like, how do you do that? | ||
| He's such a nice guy. | ||
| He's this tiny, frail, not frail, but he whips a bike around, but he's just smaller. | ||
| And he's like, how do you do that? | ||
| You're going to hurt somebody. | ||
| You're going to fucking hurt yourself, man. | ||
| You've got kids. | ||
| And I'm like, I saw you this morning, 50 feet above the ground, upside down with a fucking motorcycle. | ||
| What the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| Those dudes are nuts. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| Everybody's got their own idea of what's scary, though. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| For some people, the scariest thing in the world is public speaking. | ||
| Doing this. | ||
| Doing this would be terrifying. | ||
| But to us, this is like a hangout. | ||
| Love it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We have to remind ourselves. | |
| With headphones on. | ||
| No, it's nothing. | ||
| But to me, the idea of jumping, flipping through the air in a motorcycle, fuck all that. | ||
| Skydiving is fun, though. | ||
| Don't fucking knock it. | ||
| See, I would never do it. | ||
| I did a lot of stupid sports. | ||
| I put myself in the hospital snowboarding. | ||
| I'm tiny, but I've been good at just about everything I've done. | ||
| Yeah, I think I'm done skiing, man. | ||
| I haven't done it in a while. | ||
| I went skiing last week. | ||
| Did you really? | ||
| I fucking one-wipe hard. | ||
| You're showing snowboarding. | ||
| No, skiing. | ||
| I like skiing. | ||
| But it's not the problem. | ||
| The problem is just there's a lot of people on the fucking mountain. | ||
| You're coming down the mountain. | ||
| Where'd you go? | ||
| There's all these people. | ||
| Park City, Utah. | ||
| I love it there. | ||
| Love it. | ||
| Dude, snowboarding is so much fun. | ||
| It's always fun as fuck. | ||
| But you're coming down the mountain, and you're like, don't get hurt, don't get hurt, don't get hurt, don't get hurt. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| Ooh, I didn't get hurt. | ||
| Let's try it again. | ||
| Don't get hurt, don't get hurt, don't get hurt. | ||
| So there's all these people that are zipping and zagging. | ||
| There's people way better than you, and there's people that suck worse than you. | ||
| And, you know, you're managing all this stuff as you're going down. | ||
| There's so many people on the mountain, man, because it was, I guess, President's Day weekend? | ||
| What was last weekend? | ||
| That's President's Day. | ||
| So it was super crowded, man. | ||
| Do you fall multiple times every run? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| I only fell three times in two days. | ||
| That's fucking good. | ||
| One was hard. | ||
| I grew up doing it, man. | ||
| Fuck that noise. | ||
| I'm going fast, too, man. | ||
| Never go where? | ||
| Skiing, snowboarding. | ||
| I grew up snowboarding. | ||
| Man, I miss it. | ||
| I want to go before the snow melts. | ||
| You can't pay me enough to do it. | ||
| Dude, I'm an asshole. | ||
| Well, I try and do things I used to do when I was in high school. | ||
| Like, oh my god, I can rodeo that, or I can frontside five that, or do something over this jump, and then I end up... | ||
| What are these terms you're using? | ||
| Doing flips and spins and... | ||
| You do a rodeo? | ||
| You flip in the air? | ||
| I've been... | ||
| Look how fucking small I am. | ||
| I can flip over anything. | ||
| But you flip doing snowboarding? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You flip? | |
| I used to, yeah. | ||
| Oh my god, you're one of those guys. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| You hit your face? | ||
| You're one of those guys. | ||
| I'm totally fine. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But I was never that good. | |
| I would just try that stuff. | ||
| My brother, on the other hand, was really good. | ||
| But of course, he blew out his knee twice, two collarbone breaks... | ||
| Collarbone's always gone. | ||
| When you land wrong and you land face down, I've been with guys, friends that are crazy like that, and I would just slide down the mountain. | ||
| Collarbone is one of those moves that assholes think they could end a fight with. | ||
| Like, Jesse James was on Howard Stern. | ||
| He was talking about street fighting. | ||
| And he was like, what do I do? | ||
| I just hit people in the collarbone. | ||
| I'm like, fuck you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck you. | |
| Come hit my collarbone. | ||
| Come hit it. | ||
| Get close to my collarbone. | ||
| Come hit it. | ||
| All I have to do is this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Maybe if it's your first surprise move. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I've never even heard of a guy getting his collarbone broken like that. | |
| He's not going to get close enough. | ||
| He's not going to do shit. | ||
| If you have a pipe in your hand. | ||
| Like, if you make believe you don't want to fight, and you're like, dude, let's just talk this out. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| Okay, a straight punch to collarbone ain't doing jack shit. | ||
| It's not doing jack shit. | ||
| To the sternum, it's going to fuck you up. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| You think that guy can punch? | ||
| He's just so big. | ||
| Let's say his big ass. | ||
| Guarantee you that guy punches like a bitch. | ||
| Guarantee you. | ||
| One from downtown to the sternum? | ||
| From downtown if you're standing there waiting for it. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| You're talking to a girl and he's like, hey, boom! | ||
| His buddy distraction comes up and he's fucking cautious. | ||
| People talk tough guy stuff when they say, like, I'll hit a guy in the sternum or I'll hit a guy in the collarbone. | ||
| I'm like, just stop talking. | ||
| Are you talking about Steven Seagal 101? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's what you're talking about, son. | ||
| Generally, people say... | ||
| That's his life. | ||
| Well, Eddie Bravo and I had the worst guy ever. | ||
| There was a guy who told us he would grab your thumbnail. | ||
| He would pinch down your thumbnail. | ||
| Do you remember that fucking guy, Vinny? | ||
| Remember that guy Vinny from the Comedy Store? | ||
| Remember the fake jujitsu guy? | ||
| I do remember him, yeah. | ||
| Remember that guy? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He would grab your thumb and press down your thumbnail. | ||
| He was convinced that he... | ||
| I'll just grab you. | ||
| I'll grab you like this. | ||
| There's a pressure point on the tip of your thumb. | ||
| It's intolerable. | ||
| The pain is intolerable. | ||
| And I'm like, this motherfucker. | ||
| Like, you just want to hit him with a frying pan. | ||
| He grabbed my thumb. | ||
| He grabbed it. | ||
| He grabbed it. | ||
| He grabbed my thumb. | ||
| He squeezed the shit out of my dick. | ||
| Let me show you. | ||
| But it hurts. | ||
| It doesn't feel good. | ||
| But it doesn't even make you scream. | ||
| It doesn't make sense. | ||
| It doesn't make any sense. | ||
| First of all, good luck holding on to it. | ||
| It's just the tip of your thumb. | ||
| Dude, if I'm that guy and I'm selling that lie to chicks to get laid, and Joe Rogan comes around, I'm not saying shit. | ||
| Meanwhile, all you have to do is suck your thumbs before you fight him and he's doomed. | ||
| Get them all slippery. | ||
| Lube up your thumbs. | ||
| Just stop. | ||
| Is this James Krause? | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| He's good, dude. | ||
| I like that guy. | ||
| Fun fights tonight. | ||
| Who's he fighting? | ||
| Shane Campbell? | ||
| Is that who he's fighting? | ||
| The fight I wanted to see most was that... | ||
| What's his name? | ||
| Cody and that Linker. | ||
| Oh, Lineker? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Cody Goldberg. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That was the fight. | |
| Lineker pulled out. | ||
| He got sick. | ||
| Is that what happened? | ||
| The Brazilian, what's it called? | ||
| Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute. | ||
| He got Zika? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| No. | ||
| No, not Zika. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| You got something bad. | ||
| Malaria? | ||
| Nope, not malaria. | ||
| Something like... | ||
| AIDS? Nope. | ||
| Gonorrhea? | ||
| Man, that would be cool. | ||
| Leprosy? | ||
| No. | ||
| Steroids? | ||
| They allow you to fight with herpes, believe me. | ||
| Damn, son! | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Just kidding. | ||
| Wink. | ||
| Yeah, he got it. | ||
| It was gone. | ||
| You get it from mosquitoes out there. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| The guy who stepped in his place is Augusto Mendes, Taquino. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Correct. | |
| That guy beat Hoffa Mendes to win the world championship. | ||
| So the guy, Taquino, is fighting fucking tonight. | ||
| Cody hits like a tank, though. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This guy's a tank though. | ||
| He was preparing for a guy with no jiu-jitsu, and all of a sudden he's got a guy who's one of the best jiu-jitsu artists in the fucking world. | ||
| And he's big. | ||
| He didn't make weight either. | ||
| Takino is a fucking tank whose base... | ||
| He's not like a regular jiu-jitsu guy. | ||
| He's known for his ultimate balance and base. | ||
| He's gonna be on top of your head. | ||
| Damn, that sucks for Cody. | ||
| Sucks hard for Cody. | ||
| Hey, son. | ||
| I don't know anything about his striking. | ||
| Do you have a promising career? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Check this shit out. | |
| I don't know anything about his striking. | ||
| His striking could be garbage. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
| But, man. | ||
| Cody can wrestle, too. | ||
| He wrestled D1 or no? | ||
| No. | ||
| I hate saying this shit because I played basketball in high school, so I never called myself a basketball player. | ||
| But he wrestled in high school. | ||
| He's really good. | ||
| And he had all these boxing fights and kickboxing, amateur MMA. He definitely doesn't suck. | ||
| He's good, man. | ||
| Heavy hands. | ||
| Extra Little Fact Taquino used to date Mackenzie Dern. | ||
| Dude, I'm not mad at her at all. | ||
| Easy with the dirt boys. | ||
| Mackenzie? | ||
| She's a jiu-jitsu girl, right? | ||
| Yeah, she's the best jiu-jitsu girl on the planet. | ||
| And she's hot. | ||
| By far the hottest girl to ever grace a gi. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Kira Gracie? | ||
| She's pretty goddamn hot, too. | ||
| She's really hot. | ||
| I'd take McKenzie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Different bodies. | |
| Because then you've got to deal with all the Gracies if you date her. | ||
| You've got to think about that shit. | ||
| That's even better. | ||
| That's tough, man. | ||
| It's a lot of pressure. | ||
| Family functions. | ||
| Become one of the family. | ||
| Bring the show. | ||
| I've got to do the Gracie diet and shit all the time. | ||
| You've got to only watermelon by yourself. | ||
| Speaking of the Gracies, Big... | ||
| Mad props to Hoist Gracie, even though there was some crazy thing with Ken Shamrock. | ||
| Hoist went out there and did what he does and... | ||
| Did what he does? | ||
| Knee guys to the balls? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Oh, come on. | ||
| Was that really... | ||
| If he submitted him, you could say, did what he does. | ||
| He took him down and beat the shit out of him. | ||
| If Ken was just wearing... | ||
| Six straight strikes to the face. | ||
| Six solid... | ||
| You're just saying that because he doesn't like you. | ||
| You're trying to win him back. | ||
| You're trying to win him back. | ||
| Dad! | ||
| Maybe he'll forgive me. | ||
| Please love me. | ||
| Yeah, maybe he'll forgive me. | ||
| No, but I'll just call it like I see it. | ||
| He showed some serious K-1 or K-3 striking. | ||
| K-4? | ||
| Maybe K-5? | ||
| You didn't think his footwork was alright? | ||
| I thought Ken was really hesitant, standing on the outside. | ||
| I thought Ken would light him up. | ||
| I'm saying Ken, compared to Hoist's footwear, Hoist wasn't doing much. | ||
| There's no threat to his striking, so I was like super surprised that Ken wasn't lighting him up. | ||
| Because if you go back to like Ken that fought Fujita, Ken had some fucking legit leg kicks, some good power. | ||
| Yeah, but he... | ||
| 25 years ago. | ||
| He's not... | ||
| A cripple? | ||
| I mean, where did the body go? | ||
| He's got to have that power. | ||
| He's got to have that ability. | ||
| Those aren't the same joints, my man. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| I mean, I don't know what's going on with his body, but I would have thought Ken would have fucked his legs up. | ||
| If I was in Ken's corner, I would say, you're going to kick the shit out of this dude's legs. | ||
| He's no threat with punches. | ||
| It's not like he's going to drop you with one straight right hand. | ||
| So what you do is, you paw with the hands, and you come in and you throw bomb leg kicks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dengue fever. | |
| Ooh, that's no joke. | ||
| That's not fun. | ||
| That kills motherfuckers. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I would have thought Ken would have just lit those legs on fire. | ||
| But at the same time, Hoist's chance was on the ground. | ||
| He didn't want to get taken down. | ||
| He had dengue fever, too. | ||
| He might have got that, too. | ||
| He might have got everything. | ||
| If Hoist's number one strategy was to take a guy down, that would make you hesitant throwing leg kicks, right? | ||
| Not if you're You're Ken Shamrock with his wrestling background and his striking. | ||
| Fuck a takedown from Hoist Gracie. | ||
| Yeah, Hoist is not like a D1 wrestler who's 20 years old. | ||
| But he clenches up and trips. | ||
| He clenches up and trips. | ||
| He knows how to do that. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| James Krause with the... | ||
| I'm calling like I see it, Brendan. | ||
| Yeah, buddy. | ||
| He's got it. | ||
| He's snug as fuck. | ||
| He's got it. | ||
| Oh, that's a tap. | ||
| Is it a tap? | ||
| Nope. | ||
| End of the round. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| End of the round. | ||
| Hey, has there ever been a bigger shit show than that Bellator fight? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Never. | |
| I think it put our sport back seven years. | ||
| Nah. | ||
| Just put Bellator back. | ||
| Free agents now are going to go, Bellator? | ||
| Fuck, man. | ||
| Fuck that. | ||
| How about Dada? | ||
| Went to the hospital. | ||
| Yeah, his heart stopped. | ||
| Gotta die! | ||
| It was filled with cheeseburgers and fried chicken and orange soda. | ||
| Is there any way you could have trained for that fight? | ||
| Is there any way? | ||
| There's no way he trained. | ||
| No, no way. | ||
| He thought he was just... | ||
| I mean, he might have trained for a couple of days. | ||
| They said he lost 40 pounds. | ||
| Well, that's not good. | ||
| You should have lost 40 pounds before. | ||
| It's not like you didn't know you were going to do this. | ||
| You don't do that in the backyards. | ||
| Well, how about Kimbo? | ||
| What the fuck was going on with him? | ||
| That wasn't even amateur hours. | ||
| If it's an amateur fight, you'd be chomping at the bit to get at those guys. | ||
| But I hope they're in my bracket. | ||
| All you have to do is dance around for a few minutes. | ||
| These guys are toast. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| A low-level college wrestler would have fucked those dudes up. | ||
| Fuck the college wrestlers. | ||
| How about the one exchange where Dada just sort of laid down and Kimbo just rolled over on top of him? | ||
| He just laid down. | ||
| That hurt my soul. | ||
| They just laid down. | ||
| The fight hurt my soul. | ||
| There was no takedown. | ||
| It was like, let's just take this to the ground. | ||
| I wonder if they were talking to each other. | ||
| You want to take this to the ground, homie? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Is this a chill dog? | ||
| Can we chill? | ||
| How about Kimbo and Mal? | ||
| Dude, I felt like throwing up. | ||
| I got done, I was like, ah. | ||
| Early in the first round, though, it didn't look so bad. | ||
| I was like, okay, Kimbo's got some ground skills. | ||
| I thought, okay, this guy's going to get fucked up. | ||
| Kimbo's going to pound him out, but zero gas. | ||
| Have you seen the documentary that Dada comes from, Dog Fights? | ||
| Yeah, that's my friend Billy Corbin. | ||
| Yeah, Billy Corbin, yeah. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| He's the best. | ||
| You had him on your podcast, right? | ||
| We had him on your podcast, yeah. | ||
| Billy's great. | ||
| Billy's great. | ||
| And he's the guy who did Cooking Cowboys. | ||
| Yes, and the U. Yes. | ||
| He's great. | ||
| Billy's awesome. | ||
| But that's where I was like, damn, Dada has some hands, man. | ||
| This guy's kind of cool. | ||
| His haircut's cool. | ||
| He's got some hands. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, he was fighting. | ||
| Look, that's the thing about can crushers. | ||
| You look awesome if you're fighting nobody. | ||
| But he's 2-0. | ||
| You come from fighting on the back streets of Miami, and then you're fucking launched into Bellator. | ||
| Not only that, he's 2-0, and I think his last opponent, whoever was talking about it on the broadcast, was talking about the record of his last opponent. | ||
| It was like, you know, 0-16. | ||
| That was like a midget fight, you know what I mean? | ||
| It's like... | ||
| You know what that showed? | ||
| That showed that maybe Bellator just was a little too eager to try to do things that the UFC wasn't willing to do. | ||
| It's the pride thing, you know what I mean? | ||
| When you come out, you have Tyson commentating and he's drunk. | ||
| All the stuff that the UFC wouldn't do, Bellator's like, we're gonna do it. | ||
| You can't do that, man. | ||
| Do you think Tyson was drunk? | ||
| He was on something. | ||
| He was on some pills. | ||
| He was on some shit. | ||
| I think he might have been on a whole career of getting punched in the head. | ||
| You think? | ||
| Hopefully when I have brain trauma like that catches up, I hope I'm like that. | ||
| He was funny. | ||
| Mike Tyson commentating is hilarious. | ||
| He was funny. | ||
| Which way did he go? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Which way did he go? | |
| I'm totally for that. | ||
| When Melvin Gillard got knocked out, he's like, which way did he go? | ||
| Which way did he go? | ||
| He's ruthless. | ||
| Ruthless mocking dudes getting teed off on. | ||
| He's like, look where you're going to be eventually. | ||
| Look at me. | ||
| But just in the grand scheme of things like Bellator, they signed Ben Henderson, who's a fucking monster. | ||
| That's good. | ||
| And you want to get all these other guys to come over. | ||
| And Phil Davis. | ||
| So they're making momentum. | ||
| Then you put that product out. | ||
| If I'm a free agent, I'm like, fuck, man. | ||
| I don't want to be part of that. | ||
| I think they eventually got to let all that stuff go. | ||
| They can't keep doing those. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| They should stop. | ||
| This is the last one. | ||
| Stop the sideshow. | ||
| Because if they keep doing it, they're going to really lose credibility. | ||
| There's a lot of things they need to do. | ||
| That name, they're sticking with that stupid fucking name and they're calling it Bellator Kickboxing too. | ||
| Hey man, let's not do that. | ||
| Bellator is a dumb name. | ||
| Who runs the PR for fuck's sakes? | ||
| You rest assured, you're absolutely only going to get people that are fans of Bellator already. | ||
| They're going to take it seriously and look for it. | ||
| People that are flipping through the channels, when they see Bellator live, what does that mean? | ||
| What does that mean? | ||
| It doesn't mean anything. | ||
| But if you have MMA like, oh, Kraus got it again. | ||
| Damn, this dude knows how to turn away from chokes. | ||
| Yeah, he's nasty at getting out. | ||
| But Kraus is all over him. | ||
| He's nasty at surviving. | ||
| But I'm just thinking, if they just turned it into MMA, oh, look at this, Kraus hits an armbar. | ||
| Kraus is fucking ferocious on the ground. | ||
| This dude's got his back now. | ||
| If they just turned it into MMA, everybody knows what MMA is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I agree. | |
| It's Bellator MMA. Yeah, but it's Bellator. | ||
| It's a dumb name. | ||
| I don't think the name matters. | ||
| Ryzen. | ||
| I disagree. | ||
| Pride. | ||
| Yeah, Ryzen didn't mean shit. | ||
| You get used to it. | ||
| How's Ryzen and Pride doing, Eddie? | ||
| Huh? | ||
| How's Ryzen and Pride doing? | ||
| Oh, because of their name they failed? | ||
| It's details, my man. | ||
| It's details. | ||
| Well, it starts with a goddamn name. | ||
| I thought it was because of the Yakuza, but I guess it's... | ||
| Do you pay attention to the sneaky shit that the fucking Athletic Commission did to Vanderlei? | ||
| Sneaky ass shit. | ||
| Vanderlei signs a fight with Fedor. | ||
| The UFC lets him go, okay? | ||
| So Vanderlei finally can make some money. | ||
| The dude hasn't been able to make any money in over a year. | ||
| I saw his Instagram. | ||
| It's like 17 months. | ||
| He hasn't been able to make a dime, right? | ||
| So he's struggling. | ||
| And the Athletic Commission totally did him dirty. | ||
| They suspended him for his entire career. | ||
| The judge overrules it, says that you can't do that. | ||
| You can't just suspend a guy forever. | ||
| You can't just deny him a right to make a living. | ||
| Vandele gets a release from the UFC, signs to fight Fedor and Ryzen. | ||
| It's a big payday for him. | ||
| I'll watch that. | ||
| Finally, he's gonna get some money, right? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You know what the Athletic Commission does? | ||
| What? | ||
| They fucking suspend him for three years. | ||
| So they say, okay, we are going to change your suspension from a lifetime ban three years, so it's retroactive. | ||
| So he still has a year and a half to go, so he can't take this fight. | ||
| Hold up, but Ryzen's in where? | ||
| Japan? | ||
| It doesn't matter. | ||
| Why? | ||
| If he goes over there and takes that fight, they'll view it as a violation. | ||
| He won't be able to fight in the United States. | ||
| Fuck it! | ||
| But it doesn't matter. | ||
| He'll never be able to fight in the United States, so he's stuck over there. | ||
| Yeah, he should say fuck it. | ||
| But here's why he shouldn't. | ||
| Bellator will probably pay him some serious fucking money. | ||
| Some serious fucking money. | ||
| How old will he be in a year and a half? | ||
| Yeah, but he's not a year and a half older. | ||
| Bellator, let's take it international then. | ||
| Yeah, but Ryzen ain't gonna be around, son. | ||
| Ryzen doesn't have much time. | ||
| And what's he gonna do? | ||
| He's gonna fight for one FC? No one watches that. | ||
| You know, Ben Askren's been whooping Chinese dudes' asses over there for a year and a half. | ||
| No one sees shit. | ||
| And can't get a fucking write-up on anything. | ||
| No, he talks about it. | ||
| Ben Askren's ragdolling, beating the fuck out of dudes. | ||
| I like they allow him to do his knees on the ground. | ||
| Isn't Crone fighting in 1FC or is that Ryzen? | ||
| No, he's fighting in Ryzen too. | ||
| His last fight was Ryzen. | ||
| But before that was 1FC, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Correct. | |
| And Aoki's fighting in 1FC too? | ||
| I think his first fight was 1FC. I'm pretty sure. | ||
| It was in Asia. | ||
| Maybe it was another organization. | ||
| Yeah, his first fight was NFC. His last fight was Ryzen though. | ||
| But if I'm Wanderlei, what are you going to do, wait around? | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| The fight in the States? | ||
| I just think it's dirty what the Athletic Commission did. | ||
| They're fucked up. | ||
| They suspended him right after he takes his fight. | ||
| So by violating it, essentially they're playing little games. | ||
| Because by him violating that, they're really like... | ||
| They get what they want. | ||
| Yeah, they get what they want. | ||
| Wanderlei's bigger over there. | ||
| Yeah, but all they had to do, like how many months away is that fight? | ||
| Like it's in August, right? | ||
| Correct. | ||
| At least what he posted. | ||
| March, April, May, June, July, August. | ||
| If they just gave him two years, he would have been out. | ||
| He would have been done at the end of July, he would have been able to fight, and they gave him an extra year, so he's fucked. | ||
| You know what, man? | ||
| Two years is what you're supposed to get, because that's what you would have got if he tested positive. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| That's what Gleason did. | ||
| He ran. | ||
| Let's pretend he was positive. | ||
| Pretend he was positive, then he's two years, you fine him for whatever, and you let the guy have a goddamn fucking career. | ||
| This is a game. | ||
| I think it's a game. | ||
| He's also a legend. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You son of a bitch. | ||
| First of all, why is it three years when he didn't test positive if it's two years if he did test positive? | ||
| That doesn't make any sense. | ||
| Two years is the right amount. | ||
| If a guy runs from a test, assume he's positive. | ||
| He definitely shouldn't have ran. | ||
| He definitely should be penalized. | ||
| Every fighter who runs from a test should be penalized as if they tested positive. | ||
| So if that's the case, why three years? | ||
| Why not two? | ||
| Didn't ovary run from a test? | ||
| No. | ||
| He tested positive. | ||
| No, he tested positive. | ||
| Horsemeat. | ||
| Yeah, horsemeat. | ||
| I don't know why he did a German voice. | ||
| Is that what it was? | ||
| It's a mustache. | ||
| Dude, back to Bellator. | ||
| How about your boy Justin Wren wants to fight Kimbo Slice? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck yeah. | |
| Kimbo Slice is going night-night. | ||
| Because Justin Wren, you can hit that dude in the head with a rock. | ||
| He's a gorilla. | ||
| I don't think Justin knocks him out. | ||
| I think Justin takes him down and beats his beard in. | ||
| He beats the shit out of him. | ||
| He takes him down if he wants to, but if he's standing with him, all he has to do is keep moving. | ||
| But you know, the reason Justin wants to fight is because it's such a big fight so he can build wells in fucking Africa. | ||
| That's why he wants such a mainstream fight. | ||
| He's different than other dudes. | ||
| That's why he deserves it, too. | ||
| He deserves it. | ||
| He's awesome. | ||
| And if Bellator's smart, they should do it. | ||
| It's a good story, especially Kimbo's last fight. | ||
| Let's figure this out. | ||
| It might not be his last fight. | ||
| Well, no. | ||
| I'm just saying. | ||
| It should be his last fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| It's whatever. | ||
| You know Justin and Kimbo were supposed to fight on Ultimate Fighter 10? | ||
| It was lined up, and then the suits came in. | ||
| They were supposed to fight. | ||
| The week of the fight, the suits came in like, hey, Justin. | ||
| They sat Justin down like... | ||
| For ratings, we gotta do this, and then they put in Roy Nelson. | ||
| Well, that's even dumber, because Roy Nelson is very fucking skilled. | ||
| Well, no, they wanted Roy to beat him. | ||
| Yeah, they wanted Roy to beat him. | ||
| I mean, it's Roy Nelson. | ||
| Yeah, but nobody knew who Roy was back then. | ||
| Ah, man, Roy's... | ||
| I mean, he's pretty big. | ||
| I don't think they wanted Kimbo to do well, is what I'm trying to tell you. | ||
| Oh, like the UFC didn't want Kimbo to do well. | ||
| Because they knew he was going to lose, because, to be honest, anyone with a good... | ||
| Set of skills, we're going to beat Kimbo. | ||
| So whoever got that first crack at him, he was probably going to get fucked up. | ||
| So he fought Justin. | ||
| Justin would be and become a star. | ||
| Roy, you know. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So it's a big fight. | ||
| They didn't want him to do well. | ||
| Roy was by far the worst matchup. | ||
| Justin was supposed to fight him. | ||
| The coaches had it all matched up. | ||
| They yanked Justin. | ||
| Insert fucking Roy Nelson with 30 fights. | ||
| Enjoy that, Kimbo. | ||
| Yeah, enjoy getting crucifixed. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| So now Justin's like, yo, we're supposed to fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I'm trying to build some fucking wells. | ||
| Yeah, he's definitely got different motivation than everybody else. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| What a great guy he is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God, such a better guy than me. | |
| Because I would take that money and buy watches and cars and shit. | ||
| There's no wells. | ||
| There's no water. | ||
| Oh, yo, yo, yo. | ||
| We've got some bad news. | ||
| I can't get the well equipment to Africa. | ||
| What happened? | ||
| Some rims. | ||
| What's going on with your Instagram page? | ||
| How much does that watch cost? | ||
| Exactly the same amount as a well. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| Dude, I bought myself a gift from a charity. | ||
| I bought myself a gift for having a baby. | ||
| I guess you get the model. | ||
| What about me? | ||
| Bought myself a Rolex, son. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What about me? | |
| Yeah, I'm like, what about me? | ||
| I showed up. | ||
| My dad's like, what's that? | ||
| I'm like, I got a push gift, Ed. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Yeah, for reals. | ||
| A push gift. | ||
| Yeah, girls get push gifts. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| There's two dads. | ||
| Krause is back. | ||
| Deep. | ||
| Two hooks in. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Flattened out. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| Crouse escape! | ||
| Back to his back! | ||
| You can escape into an arm triangle right there. | ||
| As soon as he turns. | ||
| He's too smart for that son. | ||
| He's got one or the other. | ||
| He's going to have his back taken still. | ||
| Dude, that McGregor Dos Anjos makes my dick hard. | ||
| Even that fly right there. | ||
| It makes other people's dicks hard. | ||
| I'm going to say something crazy, Joe. | ||
| You ready for this? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I think the toughest matchup possible in the UFC for McGregor is Dos Anjos. | ||
| I think the easier fight is Robbie Lawler for him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Suck on that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I've been thinking about that a lot lately. | ||
| And it's... | ||
| God, I hate everyone fucking talking about this right now. | ||
| And I was just putting two and two together. | ||
| I'm like, well, if he does knock out Dasanio's... | ||
| I was like, wow. | ||
| Him and Robbie are going to fucking throw down. | ||
| No, they're not. | ||
| Robbie's not going to touch him. | ||
| You don't think so? | ||
| Not a chance. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You think he's just going to move around a while? | ||
| I think he fucks Robbie up. | ||
| And I love Robbie. | ||
| Style-wise, I think he fucks Robbie up. | ||
| Where does Conor stop? | ||
| At 170. He fucks everybody up at 170. Why wouldn't he go 185? | ||
| He's already stating publicly that he's not afraid of any weight class. | ||
| Here's what I have to say to everybody. | ||
| Everybody at 170, stay the fuck away from Wonderboy. | ||
| That dude's got the fucking glow right now. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| He's got the Bruce Leroy glow. | ||
| That's my motherfucker. | ||
| Just stay the fuck away. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| What he did to Johnny Hendrix should be against the law. | ||
| They should have shut the lights off. | ||
| They should have separated them and go, whoa, whoa, whoa, not tonight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Not tonight, bro. | |
| We need to stop this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hendrix came in shape, had all his fucking shit figured out. | |
| How big is karate right now? | ||
| Karate is strong as fuck right now. | ||
| It's been years that sport karate has this one element that no one knows how to fuck with. | ||
| These blitz guys. | ||
| These Raymond Daniels guys that jump in and attack and then jump out before you can do anything about it. | ||
| And if you don't have some serious Nicky Holtzkin style or Joseph Valtellini style Muay Thai skills where you can get hands up high and chop those legs. | ||
| No one has that right now. | ||
| No one has that. | ||
| No one in the UFC has it right now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Not at that level. | |
| Look at what Raymond Daniels does to everybody except Nicky Holtzkin and Joseph Valtellino in glory. | ||
| Valtellini was the first guy exposed it. | ||
| Chopped those legs down. | ||
| Hands up high. | ||
| Good guard. | ||
| Attack, attack, attack the legs. | ||
| And eventually chop them down. | ||
| And he head kicks him and stops him. | ||
| And the same thing with Nicky Holtzkin. | ||
| It's that super solid Muay Thai base. | ||
| But everybody else gets 360 wheel kicked in the head. | ||
| He hits you with that jumping side kick. | ||
| Touches you with the side kick and then spins the back kick to the face. | ||
| So I think Wonderboy right now beats everyone. | ||
| The worst matchup for him? | ||
| Roy McDonald. | ||
| He's too smart. | ||
| I think he grinds him out. | ||
| Guess who he's fighting next. | ||
| Fuck off. | ||
| Roy McDonald? | ||
| That's what I'm hearing. | ||
| I could see Roy throwing a real heavy boy tie. | ||
| I fucking hate that for him. | ||
| Let's let Wonderboy do his thing! | ||
| Why would you give him the worst matchup possible? | ||
| Why wouldn't you give Roy an opportunity to stop the hype train if he's believing it so strongly? | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Okay, what do you think Roy's gonna be able to do to him? | ||
|
unidentified
|
He just wants to wear his skin, that's all. | |
| I just want to, you know, carry him into the woods. | ||
| I don't think the UFC has announced that fight because I don't know if it's 100%. | ||
| It's a rumor. | ||
| I saw it was a rumor. | ||
| That's why I mentioned it. | ||
| I might have done a little fucking... | ||
| No, it's a rumor. | ||
| I saw it before. | ||
| I might have done a video where I hyped it up already. | ||
| That hasn't aired yet? | ||
| It might have happened. | ||
| I mean, I don't remember. | ||
| Might be breaking news. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Cheeto fingers. | ||
| Write that one. | ||
| Speaking of... | ||
| Advancing. | ||
| 15%. | ||
| I think Roy McDonald's too smart to fall into his traps. | ||
| Okay, so what does he do? | ||
| He's got to kickbox with them when they're on the outside. | ||
| And that's where you're fucked. | ||
| His jab is fucking nasty. | ||
| And then as soon as Roy gets comfortable... | ||
| But he fucks everybody. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| That's a giant one, dude. | ||
| That's the biggest battery I've ever seen on one of those things. | ||
| That thing is like a paper towel roll. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just put it in your mouth. | |
| Just put it in your mouth. | ||
| How long does that battery last? | ||
| At least it lasts a year. | ||
| A while, I don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I have no idea. | |
| You could go fucking hiking in the Alps with that battery. | ||
| I love this. | ||
| Like, Q asked earlier, do you smoke pot? | ||
| I was like, I smoke a lot of pot. | ||
| Smoked a lot. | ||
| No one ever knew. | ||
| I knew that about you. | ||
| I knew that about you. | ||
| You knew that, yeah. | ||
| Maybe I knew and I forgot. | ||
| I figured you didn't. | ||
| Oh, this is legit. | ||
| I'm good, man. | ||
| I have this thing. | ||
| I'll get fired from life. | ||
| I'll get fired from life. | ||
| I'll say some outrageous shit. | ||
| What a shitty dad! | ||
| That's good, dude. | ||
| That's good. | ||
| Roy Wonderboy. | ||
| That's interesting, man. | ||
| It may happen. | ||
| It may not. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| We'll find out soon. | ||
| Connor Wonderboy. | ||
| Shit. | ||
| Connor Wonderboy. | ||
| Here's the thing. | ||
| You got a kick with Wonderboy, and Connor's kicks are just nowhere near the level of Wonderboy's. | ||
| It's just not even in the same... | ||
| Are you sure about that? | ||
| I'm 100% sure about that. | ||
| His hands are better than Wonderboy's, I think. | ||
| Wonderboy's got some fucking vicious hands. | ||
| How tall is Wonderboy? | ||
| Knockout power. | ||
| What Connor has in that left hand is what, for us, a hobby likes to call the touch of death. | ||
| At 145, not 55 and 70. You're talking about bigger boys. | ||
| He was knocking motherfuckers dead at 155 with one punch. | ||
| He was doing it all throughout England. | ||
| I mean, I don't know if he could do that in the UFC at 155. Different level. | ||
| Dos Anjos is a big motherfucker. | ||
| You are right. | ||
| Dos Anjos is a beast. | ||
| But I believe the kind of power that Conor has, he just has that undeniable power. | ||
| Preach. | ||
| Because I hope he does. | ||
| Preach. | ||
| It's undeniable. | ||
| I just don't know if he's going to be able to do it. | ||
| Because here's the thing about Dos Anjos. | ||
| Dos Anjos is a gap closer. | ||
| That motherfucker closes gaps on you before you even realize he's on top of you. | ||
| He did it to Donald and he did it to Pettis. | ||
| Two guys who are pretty fucking skillful strikers. | ||
| He closes that distance on you in a surprising way. | ||
| And there's no hesitation. | ||
| No hesitation. | ||
| His grappling is outstanding. | ||
| And there's no hesitation in his game. | ||
| And with that Nick Curzon dude training him, man, he's got 15 gas tanks. | ||
| They're all ready. | ||
| They're all ready to go. | ||
| Does he have a movement coach, though? | ||
| He's the movement coach. | ||
| They're doing all these crazy plyometric drills. | ||
| Everything is plyometrics. | ||
| And then you've got, you know, you've got fucking, he's got King's MMA, right? | ||
| Oh, with Cordero? | ||
| Yeah, Rafael Cordero is one of the greatest striking instructors in the world. | ||
| He's got Fabrizio Verdum there. | ||
| He's got a shitload of animals to train with. | ||
| No, he's a complete animal. | ||
| Honestly, as far as match-up-wise, you break the fight down, I can't think of a worse match-up for Conor. | ||
| It's a great match-up. | ||
| They're both in their prime. | ||
| If he beats him, he goes right to Robbie Lawler for UFC 200. And the world explodes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, if he beats him, he'd be the greatest UFC fighter of all time. | |
| Yes! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of all time! | |
| Yes, ever. | ||
| Alright, here's an argument that I was having with somebody. | ||
| This is a discussion. | ||
| This is a legit question. | ||
| Mighty Mouse right now, do you agree he's the best pound-for-pound guy? | ||
| No, too small. | ||
| Sorry, brother. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| But that's what pound for pound is. | ||
| Because the risk, the reward, he can make mistakes. | ||
| He's destroying the competition. | ||
| But he couldn't make mistakes with Dotson. | ||
| Dotson could knock you dead with one shot. | ||
| Different. | ||
| Different than Jon Jones, Gustafson, DC. Different than Rumble. | ||
| Rumble. | ||
| I disagree with Gustafson. | ||
| I don't think Gustafson knocks you dead with one punch any easier than Dotson does. | ||
| Matter of fact, I think Dotson offers more danger on the feet. | ||
| I disagree. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| But we're allowed to. | ||
| Yeah, that's what we're here for. | ||
| You can be wrong, that's fine. | ||
| Okay, so at the very least, he's number two pound for pound best in the world. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Alright, I think he's number one. | ||
| A lot of other people think he's number one, including Boss Rootin, but what the fuck's he now, right? | ||
| So, Joe Rogan Boss Rootin. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It makes sense. | |
| So, if Cejudo beats him... | ||
| He's an Olympic gold medalist in wrestling. | ||
| So he becomes the first Olympic gold medalist in wrestling that wins a flyweight title. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And he beats arguably the best guy ever. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| If Demetrius Mighty Mouse Johnson is the best guy right now, and you've fought him before. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I know you look at him like today, and you look at what he's been able to do over his last few fights, it's hard to argue a more dominant champion. | ||
| He doesn't get hit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Doesn't get hit by the best guys in the world. | ||
| Don McCruz beat him. | ||
| Yes, a long time ago at 135. He's a different fighter then. | ||
| I'm just saying. | ||
| Ian arguably won as well. | ||
| I'll tell you that. | ||
| That's why he's not my pound for pound number one. | ||
| But that's a long time ago. | ||
| So Del Sanchez got choked out by Clay Guida. | ||
| Who's Jon Jones lost to? | ||
| It's true. | ||
| He lost to a shitty rule. | ||
| He lost to a shitty rule. | ||
| He didn't even lose to Matt Hamill. | ||
| He fucked him up. | ||
| He lost to a shitty rule. | ||
| The rule beat him. | ||
| He was crushing Matt Hamill. | ||
| Didn't he separate his clavicle or something off that fucking dump he did on Matt Hamill? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| No, he separated his fucking elbow driving into his orbital. | ||
| That was brutal. | ||
| Beat the fuck at him. | ||
| But a total dominant performance, you can never call that a loss. | ||
| And I don't give a fuck what planet you're on. | ||
| I mean, everybody agrees with that. | ||
| We haven't seen John lose like DJ. Never lost. | ||
| We haven't seen John get, it was so close like a fight with Ian McCall. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| It's a good argument. | ||
| Not really. | ||
| I think John's the best, but DJ's definitely out there. | ||
| DJ's a fucking machine. | ||
| Here's my question. | ||
| If Cejudo beats him, is he like the best combat sport athlete ever? | ||
| No, he has work to do. | ||
| He has work to do, for sure. | ||
| But if he can beat the best guy ever, is it a Styles? | ||
| I mean, arguably, if you're looking at someone who's an Olympic gold medalist and then becomes a world champion in the UFC, that's one of the greatest... | ||
| That's a massive... | ||
| Resume like as far as like accomplishments on paper the only thing that comes close is Alistair winning the k1 Grand Prix if he won the UFC title if Alistair won the k1 Grand Prix He won Strike Force. | ||
| He was a Strike Force heavyweight champion He was a dream heavyweight champion and like arguably in MMA Alistair is one of if not the most one of the most decorated guys in all sports, right? | ||
| K1 Grand Prix is the pinnacle the pinnacle of heavyweight kickboxing. | ||
| So if Cejudo Wins a gold fucking medal in the Olympic Games, and then goes on to win UFC gold. | ||
| He's right up there with one of the most accomplished mixed martial arts athletes ever. | ||
| He definitely could be, and they should be marketing the fuck of him to Mexico. | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| I hope they are. | ||
| I think it fucking better be. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's hard to sell. | |
| CM Punk's taking all the money. | ||
| It's fucking tough. | ||
| Stop it. | ||
| It's hard to sell. | ||
| Why is it hard to sell the flyweights? | ||
| Ian, why is it hard to sell your weight class? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| People are... | ||
| But yet Rhonda's the... | ||
| She's 135 too. | ||
| Small isn't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I know. | |
| She's bigger than us, but she makes more money. | ||
| He's 125. 125. 135. He's smaller than Rhonda. | ||
| Any problem doesn't even know what weight you fight in. | ||
| That's why me and Rhonda will never fight. | ||
| It's because she weighs more than me. | ||
| That's rude. | ||
| It's a strange phenomenon because in boxing, it's the same thing. | ||
| In boxing, you get like the Chocolito. | ||
| Chocolatito? | ||
| Yeah, Chocolatito. | ||
| That motherfucker is so fucking bad. | ||
| He's a bad motherfucker. | ||
| He's knocking bitches out. | ||
| He's one of my favorite fans to watch. | ||
| Nonito Donair never really caught. | ||
| He was just a little too small. | ||
| They're too small. | ||
| He was a bad motherfucker. | ||
| People just don't buy into it, right? | ||
| They just don't buy into it. | ||
| Nonito had some sting, man. | ||
| When he was in his prime, Nonito Donaire can crack. | ||
| Is it because you want, when you think of fighters, think of like heroes, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| You want a guy to be able to beat your ass. | ||
| You want a guy to be big, yeah. | ||
| Because people look at you and they're like, Ian McCall, you would rip their dick off. | ||
| Yeah, you would rip their fucking face off. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Well, in the real world. | ||
| But the problem is, when people are watching this shit, everybody thinks that they can kick ass when they watch this stuff. | ||
| Chris Camozzi, Joe Riggs. | ||
| Joe Riggs. | ||
| Just doing the damn thing forever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Doesn't give a fuck. | |
| Doesn't give a fuck. | ||
| Tell you what, you want to talk about a world beater in the gym? | ||
| I've heard stories about Joe Riggs back when Rich Franken was a champion, and people were saying if Joe Riggs could fight in the octagon the way he spars sometimes, like he catches these rhythms, where, I mean, back then especially, he's had a rough career, you know, he's been in a lot of fights, and he's had a long, long time. | ||
| Up and down. | ||
| Inside the Octagon and other organizations. | ||
| He's been around. | ||
| Joe Ruggs is a fucking real veteran. | ||
| He used to be 300 pounds. | ||
| Yes, but when he was on fire, like when he was at his best, they were saying he was like hell on wheels in the gym. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I've heard that. | |
| People were like, if he could just get it together, he's a fucking world champion. | ||
| Dude, Chris Camozzi's a motherfucker. | ||
| Tough as shit. | ||
| In the Denver scene, he was like the guy coming up. | ||
| He was like the man, like the journeyman. | ||
| And I never trained with him, and he was a southpaw. | ||
| We couldn't find any southpaws when I was getting ready to fight Crow Cop. | ||
| So they bring Camozzi in, the nicest guy ever, and his coach goes, hey, listen, man, you're a lot bigger than Chris, but he moves and you need a southpaw so your coach calls, we're going to bring him down, but he has a fight. | ||
| It's his first UFC fight. | ||
| I think he was fighting in Australia on a two-week notice. | ||
| They go, make sure you don't hurt him. | ||
| I've never hurt anyone really in my life. | ||
| I'm like, yeah, no problem, man. | ||
| For whatever reason, 30 seconds into it, I go to throw a hook and he charges into it, break his nose. | ||
| Literally 30 seconds. | ||
| So his first UFC fight, he had a broken nose. | ||
| I don't know if he won, but he went through, I think, a decision. | ||
| He's a tough motherfucker, man. | ||
| Yeah, he's very tough. | ||
| He's very tough. | ||
| That's a hard thing in camp, right? | ||
| How hard is it for guys like you where you have to work with lighter guys or guys like you who have to work with heavier guys? | ||
| We always say that the jujitsu guys that have the best technique are the guys who are the smaller guys. | ||
| That's every sport. | ||
| Yeah, that's every sport. | ||
| Eddie's style, your style was based a lot on when you didn't lift weights. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Based on weakness. | ||
| But you think about guys like Barrett Yoshida, you think about Hoyler, like the smaller guys are known to have like this razor razor, the Mendez brothers, razor sharp technique, right? | ||
| And you know, those guys... | ||
| They have to. | ||
| Yeah, if you're trained for an MMA fight, how often did you have to spar guys that were like way heavier than you? | ||
| Oh, we've been... | ||
| I've been manicured for so long that it's been a while. | ||
| Do you get anything out of it, though? | ||
| You know, when you're going with a real big guy, you're so small. | ||
| No, that's what I'm saying. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hold on a second. | |
| What are you saying by manicure? | ||
| You mean, like, they take care of your camp much more efficiently? | ||
| Yeah, we have so many... | ||
| Because it's me and Carla. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Aspar's under one roof. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, gotcha. | |
| And Colin Oyama's... | ||
| He was Tito's coach. | ||
| He's been around forever. | ||
| Very respected. | ||
| Yeah, and then Jason House, my agent, always has guys in the gym. | ||
| There's just tons of guys. | ||
| Small guys. | ||
| Small guys. | ||
| We have 50 people that can fight amateur level to pro, and they're all under 150. That's the advantage of being small. | ||
| That's the advantage. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| In his camp, it's an advantage. | ||
| In everyone's camp. | ||
| Small guys are everywhere. | ||
| Small guys are everywhere. | ||
| My school's filled with small guys. | ||
| It's filled with small guys. | ||
| If you're a heavyweight... | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| In MMA and boxing, we were talking about earlier, we want to watch bigger guys. | ||
| I think maybe we want to watch bigger guys because bigger guys hit harder and bigger guys get knocked out easier. | ||
| And little guys, it's hard to knock out little guys. | ||
| Because in jiu-jitsu, we'd rather watch the little guys. | ||
| I disagree. | ||
| Well, the little guys can choke out. | ||
| They're generally more technical. | ||
| And you see more submissions with the little guys. | ||
| The big guys, you see a bunch of dudes just holding and shitting. | ||
| Is it possible that like... | ||
| Okay, how about when Demetrius Mighty Mouse Johnson knocked out Benavidez with one punch? | ||
| I think if we saw that more often, I think if little guys got knocked out... | ||
| I don't think it still works. | ||
| I think if little guys got knocked out easier than big guys or more than big guys, we would like the little guys. | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| It's just not that. | ||
| It's the pure mass. | ||
| When's the last time you saw a small guy in a porno? | ||
| Even in everything. | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| Even in pornos, they're fucking big. | ||
| Like, bigger dudes! | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| This is what I'm thinking, psychologically. | ||
| I thought they were smaller with regular dicks so that the dick looked bigger than... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Maybe. | |
| No, they're big boys, man. | ||
| They're big boys. | ||
| But psychologically, if you watch someone, and even if he beats up someone who's smaller than you, if you can say in your head, even if you're wrong, if you can say in your head, couldn't do that to me, then you're not as It's like when you watch Rumble, put someone in orbit. | ||
| You see Rumble hit people and put them in orbit and you just go, oh fuck, I gotta get out of this room. | ||
| Yeah, it's a totally different appeal because he's so fucking powerful at 205 that you're like, well that would definitely work on me. | ||
| They go 125, he weighs less than my girlfriend. | ||
| Is there a 125er that has heavy Conner hands? | ||
| Is there anybody like that just dropping? | ||
| Lineker, but he couldn't make the weight. | ||
| Oh my god, Lineker's a murderer. | ||
| Lineker hits fucking home. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That would have been the best fight on this card. | |
| He fought him. | ||
| He could blow the division up. | ||
| In boxing, Chiquita Gonzalez, remember Chiquita against Michael Carball back in the day in the 80s? | ||
| Those were huge pay-per-view matches. | ||
| Those guys were 115 pounds. | ||
| Because they were throwing bombs, those guys. | ||
| That was also like... | ||
| On TV, they put him on like regular TV, like ABC Wide World of Sports and shit like that. | ||
| It was pay-per-view. | ||
| No, it was pay-per-view. | ||
| Yeah, but to build him up. | ||
| Didn't Carbohol fight on all that stuff? | ||
| Did he fight on TV? They used to do a lot more of that back then, for sure. | ||
| They're going back to it now. | ||
| Carbohol also had a huge following. | ||
| He was a Phoenix guy, right? | ||
| Didn't he have a gigantic following in Phoenix? | ||
| Phoenix or New Mexico? | ||
| It's weird how Manny Pacquiao... | ||
| Carvalho is a Chicano. | ||
| Well, think about Manny Pacquiao. | ||
| He had three big fights. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| Manny Pacquiao fights at 47, right? | ||
| But he started his career eight weight classes lower. | ||
| 18? | ||
| He was like a flyweight. | ||
| If you're knocking people out, people want to see. | ||
| It doesn't matter what you weigh. | ||
| We just need dudes. | ||
| We need a dude to come in. | ||
| You know, Jose Aldo, small guy, I mean, considering. | ||
| He knocks the fuck out of people. | ||
| That's what people want to see. | ||
| He still didn't get respect, though. | ||
| That motherfucker didn't lose in nine years and they had to sell him to us against Conor. | ||
| That's just the way the world is. | ||
| In America. | ||
| The world is wacky, dude. | ||
| It don't make any sense. | ||
| Well, there's a lot more to being a star than just knocking people out. | ||
| And just winning. | ||
| Look, Conor's got it all. | ||
| He's winning... | ||
| He's knocking everybody out with one punch. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He talks good. | |
| He looks good. | ||
| And he wears suits. | ||
| He's got the fucking crazy hips and shoes on. | ||
| Shit, I was crunk for Dada because his fat ass was fine. | ||
| Oh shit, Kamozi cracked Joe Riggs. | ||
| Oh shit, it's over. | ||
| It's over. | ||
| Nobody can take that. | ||
| Nobody can take that. | ||
| Dude, stop the fight. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Damn, Kamozi with the crushing. | ||
| Dude, he's crushing knees. | ||
| He's been in and out of the UFC too. | ||
| Damn, that was brutal. | ||
| Who did Ben Saunders do that to? | ||
| Remember that back in the day? | ||
| Oh my god, that was nasty. | ||
| Ben's was even more brutal. | ||
| The guy blocked it all with his face. | ||
| Ben had an actual tie clinch. | ||
| The guy wasn't just covering up. | ||
| He was just getting... | ||
| The dude was a real tough Marine, I remember, I think. | ||
| I think he was in the military. | ||
| The dude was tough as fuck and just ate those shots. | ||
| I remember that, like, yesterday. | ||
| Fucked him up with those knees. | ||
| That dude was fucking tough. | ||
| And that was one of the things I was gonna say, man. | ||
| If it wasn't for, like, in your last fight with, uh, um, what's his name? | ||
| Uh, Lineker. | ||
| When Lineker didn't make weight. | ||
| Dude, you took some fucking shots in that fight that the guys that are not as tough as you I was like holy shit like as a friend That was a hard one to watch because like in the second round I think is when he hit you with some fucking vicious body shots He hit you with some really hard bombs was it the second or the third? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| There was a moment in that fight where I was like, oh Jesus. | ||
| How long ago was that? | ||
| Ray Rock me in the third. | ||
| Is it the third? | ||
| How hard does that motherfucker hit? | ||
| Really hard. | ||
| Like, creepy hard, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, weird. | ||
| I got a... | ||
| I don't know if it's... | ||
| My coach says it's because, you know, it's because I died. | ||
| But same with me and my other training partner and coach, Romeo Danza, he died getting shot. | ||
| So we both kind of had a weird tolerance to pain. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| And not getting knocked out. | ||
| And, uh... | ||
| Wham! | ||
| And I just remember going like, holy shit, man. | ||
| Everything went, whoa! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't come after me! | |
| Don't come after me, please! | ||
| When Francisco Rivera just decided to stand and bang with him, and he's another dude I really like. | ||
| That's my good friend. | ||
| Good friend. | ||
| I love that dude. | ||
| And I think he got a raw deal in the Uriah Federer fight. | ||
| The referee should have stopped that when the eye poke happened. | ||
| It was an obvious eye poke. | ||
| But I never thought he would do that. | ||
| I thought he would move and use his skills and light him up. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| Maybe he just got hit and he just wanted to hit him back. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| When you train with Cisco in the gym, all of a sudden he starts kicking and you're like, what the fuck? | ||
| He has a sick, diverse, super technical, open, beautiful hip rotation, everything on all kinds of kicks. | ||
| Spin kicks, jump kicks. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And then all of a sudden you crack him and he's just fucking plants there in one seat. | ||
| Punch you in the face. | ||
| He's fun though, man. | ||
| I love watching that dude fight, but I felt like, man, he got a raw deal in the Faber fight, you know, and then to stand right in front of Lineker like that and just throw down in his next fight, like, this is crazy. | ||
| I wonder if he just thought that he could get him. | ||
| I think he did. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think that's what it came down to. | ||
| Dude, Lineker's spooky. | ||
| He's spooky. | ||
| That was my favorite fight on this card. | ||
| Cody vs Lineker? | ||
| That's a fucking bar burner. | ||
| That mosquito said, not on my watch, son. | ||
| He seems to be just as heavy-handed at 135, which made this fight so fucking interesting. | ||
| Still a great match, though. | ||
| Cody knocks dudes out. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Average guy from Illinois. | ||
| This guy beat Hafa Mendez. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Although, like, by an advantage or something like that, but still, just to even tie with Hafa Mendes, to keep Hafa Mendes from tapping you is huge. | ||
| Like, you survived? | ||
| No, it's cool, but I don't see someone get punched in the face. | ||
| But that was in the gi, and he's, you know, so I don't know if all his jiu-jitsu is going to translate to MMA. We're going to see. | ||
| You know, but... | ||
| Fucking poor Joe Riggs, man. | ||
| I hate seeing that. | ||
| Well, man, you know what? | ||
| Camozzi did what he wanted to do and Riggs didn't get a chance to do it. | ||
| Look, his arm is fucked up, man. | ||
| He's holding his arm. | ||
| Think about how many knees he took that he blocked on that arm. | ||
| What are the odds that arm is broken? | ||
| Pretty high, right? | ||
| I would say 85%. | ||
| Man, 26 seconds. | ||
| He got hit with some bombs there. | ||
| He got hit with some bombs. | ||
| I hate seeing those pets like that, man. | ||
| It's a rough sport, my man. | ||
| Yes, it is. | ||
| I definitely don't have to tell you. | ||
| How's your shoulder, brother? | ||
| It's fucked up. | ||
| Is it? | ||
| I probably shouldn't say anything, but my arm popped again this week. | ||
| How long are you out for? | ||
| What does that mean? | ||
| Hold on a second. | ||
| My bad. | ||
| I had surgery eight months ago. | ||
| I had a fully torn bicep tendon, two labral tears, and a fully torn rotator cuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| So they redid the whole thing. | ||
| Carla actually had her labrum done a week before me. | ||
| My doctor's like, oh yeah, we'll have it done, just like her, same shit. | ||
| And after, I remember I'm sitting there, he called me a couple days later, he's like, so how you doing? | ||
| I'm like, dude, did you fucking tap dance on my shoulder? | ||
| Like, what the fuck? | ||
| And then he told me everything he had to do, and then I had stem cell put in it. | ||
| Thank you, Dr. Thermos. | ||
| And it's really fucking strong. | ||
| My arm is strong, but all of a sudden I'll be moving, and I'll throw it, and it'll just boom. | ||
| I'm like, fucking, that'll hurt. | ||
| It won't feel good, and I'll kind of just keep shadowboxing. | ||
| Well, it's been eight months. | ||
| You know, I throw a punch the other day doing like movement drills around this ball and it just popped and I just fell to the ground holding it. | ||
| So it popped like it came out of socket? | ||
| No, no, I just felt the pop somewhere in my bicep to the middle of my arm region. | ||
| Did you get it checked out yet? | ||
| Yeah, and they can't feel them. | ||
| No bruising. | ||
| No MRI? I mean, did you get an MRI? Not yet. | ||
| They're gonna wait. | ||
| See, but I fractured and dislocated this elbow wrestling. | ||
| I've had three surgeries on this hand, two breaks, I've had a bad infection in this arm. | ||
| I got, you know, two bulging discs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Doing well. | |
| So this side of my body- Right now you have two bulging discs? | ||
| Yeah, this side of my body's kind of fucked up. | ||
| So they're totally probably related. | ||
| The bulging discs are in your neck then? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Three and four, four and five. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's right where the ulna nerve was. | ||
| For me, my issues with my neck went all the way down to my fingers. | ||
| Do you get any numbing in your fingers? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| I see doctors... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hey, man! | |
| I see doctors... | ||
| But, uh, yeah, now, like I told my mom a fucking month ago, she's like, are you gonna keep doing this? | ||
| I'm like, no, uh, yes. | ||
| Cody. | ||
| Is that his girl? | ||
| Is that his girl? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That might be his mom. | ||
| His sister? | ||
| His sister? | ||
| No, he's young as fuck. | ||
| That's his mom. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| It could be. | ||
| What a handsome fella. | ||
| He needs a new haircut. | ||
| He really needs a new haircut. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why? | |
| It's like Don Kings. | ||
| It's a white, young Don Kings. | ||
| If he's really a male model, he would have a different haircut. | ||
| The MMA community is so connected. | ||
| Like, everybody into MMA knows, okay, Sage lost, and everyone's making fun of him now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| That's like the general consensus. | ||
| Ah, fuck him. | ||
| You know, it's crazy. | ||
| He's a good guy. | ||
| He seems like a real good guy. | ||
| I may make fun of anyone anyways, but... | ||
| I didn't make fun of him. | ||
| It's not even making fun of him. | ||
| I didn't think he tapped quick. | ||
| I thought the guy put a good choke on him. | ||
| I tap people with their arm like that all the time. | ||
| It's like, I don't think it was a quick tap. | ||
| It was legit. | ||
| That guy had a good squeeze on him. | ||
| His hate comes from he got so much hype and he got paid so much more than other vets. | ||
| So other fighters are kind of like, what the fuck, man? | ||
| But think if you're him. | ||
| If you're him, you're like, dude, I didn't ask for this. | ||
| Dana was like, here's your contract. | ||
| I was like, fuck yeah. | ||
| It's not my fault I'm shredded. | ||
| Are people really concerned that the other fighters are like jealous? | ||
| I don't think the fighters are. | ||
| So when the fighters put that out, like your boy Tony Ferguson, right? | ||
| Like when the fighters put that out, then the fans go, yeah, fuck that guy. | ||
| Well, it's a natural reaction. | ||
| When someone's that beautiful, they have so many advantages, it's not nice. | ||
| It doesn't feel good. | ||
| When a guy who's got... | ||
| I mean, all due respect, but Brian Barbarina, his body don't look nothing like that. | ||
| He has like a regular athlete's body. | ||
| So with a regular guy's body... | ||
| Worse than a regular athlete. | ||
| How dare you! | ||
| I'm trying not to say dad bod. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But how about Tony Ferguson vs. | |
| Magomedov? | ||
| He whooped his ass. | ||
| He whooped his ass. | ||
| And, you know, they were all telling me after the fight, I said, does he tap guys like that all the time? | ||
| And they're like, yeah, his squeeze is ridiculous. | ||
| They say he has a sick squeeze. | ||
| Yeah, you could tap. | ||
| Kavanaugh was telling me he gets guys in that position and just taps everybody. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He apparently has this insane head and arm closure. | ||
| Some guys get that. | ||
| Some guys just have that nasty... | ||
| He didn't even try to pass the guards. | ||
| He wasn't trying to pass or improve his body position on that choke. | ||
| When you see that, and you stay in sub positions where you don't get the ultimate squeeze, but you do control their body, that's when you know a guy knows what he's doing. | ||
| If he's got to get all the way side control and lay on his stomach and start twisting, you've got to do all that to squeeze that, to get a tap out of that? | ||
| To me, that's amateur. | ||
| What he did, that was pro. | ||
| He stayed in the mount. | ||
| He stayed in half guard. | ||
| He didn't even try to pass. | ||
| I'm going to stay right here and tap you. | ||
| And the Sage kid, he really did legitimately, 100% have strep throat, and he was in the hospital two days before that fight. | ||
| So just imagine that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And antibiotics. | |
| And I'm not an antibiotic, but just imagine having strep throat and having someone clamp down on your neck. | ||
| I mean, you're already inflamed and fucked up. | ||
| That explains the quick tap. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| And you know what, Matt? | ||
| He's a kid. | ||
| He's 19 years old. | ||
| He's 19 years old, and he's in there kicking ass. | ||
| And... | ||
| How much pussy's coming his way? | ||
| Is it even measurable at any point? | ||
| He jacks off to the Bible though. | ||
| He doesn't touch him. | ||
| You're fucking up, son. | ||
| Because in 10 years he's like, God damn it. | ||
| How long is that going to fucking last? | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Me and Big Brown will teach you the slang dick. | ||
| That can't last. | ||
| Come on out, brother. | ||
| That really can't last. | ||
| So what do you think of that Tony Ferguson versus Magomedov? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| That's fucking monstrous. | ||
| You know what I said when I did the countdown show? | ||
| I said this easily could be a world championship fight. | ||
| Easy. | ||
| One of these guys, either guy can be the champion, either guy can be the challenger. | ||
| This is a legit world championship caliber fight. | ||
| The X-Factor's, uh, how, uh, Habib's body, whether he's healthy. | ||
| How's he gonna perform, taking all this time off, and Tony's a motherfucker to fight for. | ||
| And Tony, Tony's hard to manhandle, like, uh, Magomedov is used to manhandle. | ||
| Tony rolls with shit. | ||
| And Tony's striking has gotten so goddamn good. | ||
| Magomedov, If he gets a hold of Tony, Tony's going for a ride. | ||
| But that's not going to faze Tony. | ||
| You know Tony wrestled in college. | ||
| He's all funk. | ||
| He's all funk when it comes to wrestling. | ||
| You have a perfect, symmetrical wrestler who does everything correct over and over and over and over again. | ||
| All of a sudden you have Tony. | ||
| Who has great fucking basics, but he's also hitting that wild ass Grammy roll from every position. | ||
| I wrestled like that guy. | ||
| And it was fucking boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. | ||
| So, you know, what wheels can catch on faster? | ||
| I think it's going to be because they both have- Called wild cards. | ||
| Well, what Nurmagomedov loves to do is control. | ||
| He gets you on top and he beats the fuck out of you and holds you in place. | ||
| But Tony's so dynamic, I don't know if he's going to be able to hold him down the way he's going to be able to hold other people down. | ||
| And not be in trouble. | ||
| And you can see guys when they fight Habib where they break. | ||
| You can see where they're just like, this motherfucker's going to do this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How about those same shows? | |
| Yes. | ||
| He ragdolled the world champ. | ||
| Wait, he beat those angles? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Oh, beat the fuck up. | ||
| He beat them. | ||
| Ragdolled them. | ||
| Ragdolled them. | ||
| Granted, it was a few years back. | ||
| I did not remember that. | ||
| Ragdolled them. | ||
| That's huge. | ||
| He gets a hold of you. | ||
| You're going for a ride. | ||
| He's got the best grappling in the division. | ||
| He's a monster. | ||
| Did you know about his dad? | ||
| Yeah, his dad's a serious fucking Sambo coach. | ||
| Long article about how awesome his fucking dad is and family is and just... | ||
| I was like, I fucking... | ||
| I knew I liked these guys. | ||
| Technical as fuck. | ||
| Everything's perfect. | ||
| But he's had so many injuries. | ||
| Horrible injuries, too. | ||
| How horrible. | ||
| ACL, MCL, knees. | ||
| He's blown his knees out. | ||
| He blew his back out. | ||
| That changes everything when you come back from that. | ||
| Like you're shot. | ||
| Especially when you fight a guy like Tony. | ||
|
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Right? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Because in football, when you come back from one knee surgery, you may never be the same. | ||
| If you're a running back or a quarterback that scrambles, that's what happens to all the quarterbacks that scramble. | ||
| They're doing great in college and they survive. | ||
| But as soon as they get hurt in the pros, man, now they've got to stay in the pocket. | ||
| Their knees are shot and that's where they fucking close. | ||
| And MMA is way more demanding than that on your knees. | ||
| Yeah, especially when you're avoiding things. | ||
| Someone's throwing head kicks your way, or you're trying to stuff a takedown, and you're sprawling and trying to turn while someone's driving towards you. | ||
| That's why if you have a body that's prone to injury, especially if you've wrestled your whole life, and it starts to build up, like it came, man. | ||
| That motherfucker can't stay healthy for nothing. | ||
| That's exactly what I was going to say. | ||
| But I think Nurmagomedov, it's not a coincidence. | ||
| They're all in the same camp. | ||
| And it's also not a coincidence. | ||
| They have... | ||
| At least three champions out of that fucking gym and two current. | ||
| I mean, AKA is a monster house. | ||
| It's a monster house. | ||
| But they're also getting guys with a lot of miles on them. | ||
| Like DC has miles. | ||
| Kane has some motherfucking miles. | ||
| Naga Madoff has crazy miles. | ||
| Luke Rockhold's got a nice, sweet odometer, though, baby. | ||
| Full taggy cast. | ||
| That motherfucker's young. | ||
| He's the new Tesla. | ||
| Yeah, he's a Tesla. | ||
| I was gonna call him a Prius, but he's not a Prius. | ||
| No, he's a Tesla. | ||
| He's a muscle car. | ||
| No, he's the newest thing. | ||
| He's like a dope Mach 1 Mustang. | ||
| With a surfboard rack on top? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, I think that a guy like him is the future, you know? | ||
| Especially, like, he's in that division. | ||
| He's so unusual because he's a wrestler. | ||
| He's got really good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| His top game's insane. | ||
| He's tall. | ||
| He kicks hard, but he's got a good balance between being strong and being long. | ||
| Like, some long guys, they're just not as strong. | ||
| Anderson was always a long guy, but not a strong guy. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like, Anderson's never manhandled anybody the way Rockhold can manhandle you. | ||
| We'll see what he did to Lyoto. | ||
| We'll see what he did to Wyman when he gets him on the ground. | ||
| Those long guys that are strong like that, Jon Jones is the poster boy. | ||
| Yes, he's the mask. | ||
| Because people say how long he is, you get in the clinch with him, and I've wrestled with Jon, and it's like, what planet is this dude from? | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| You can totally see. | ||
| It's embarrassing. | ||
| When DC was fighting him, and he took DC down that first round, DC was like, oh shit. | ||
| DC's face was like, ah, fuck, son. | ||
| He was like, fuck. | ||
| He's strong as fuck. | ||
| He threw me across the room one time. | ||
| Jesus. | ||
| The one night I've hung out with John. | ||
| Hey, I haven't hung out with John since. | ||
| John threw me across the phone in October. | ||
| You know me, I'm the number one fan of John, but I love how everyone's like, no, he's changed. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Because on Instagram he's posting videos of working out and shit? | ||
| Let's buy the narrative, Mr. Schaub. | ||
| Dude, I'm buying he's the baddest motherfucker on the planet and he's swole now. | ||
| Good luck beating that, dude. | ||
| Yeah, fuck me. | ||
| That's all I'm buying. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What was that Subman he was taking? | ||
| I really want some of that. | ||
|
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|
Mmm. | |
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's good stuff. | ||
| There's something in the magazine. | ||
| Something. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Bermudez versus Kawajiri. | ||
|
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|
Ooh! | |
| Good fight. | ||
|
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|
Kawajiri. | |
| This is actually a very good fight. | ||
| Kawajiri was a motherfucker in Japan, man. | ||
| Legend. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Remember, Bermudez was on, I think, a seven or eight fight win streak? | ||
| Well, Kawajiri's had some tough fights in MMA period because the first big one he had was with Melendez and it was back when Zufa had purchased Strikeforce and they reinstated elbows. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| Oh, he got fucked up. | ||
| Gilbert took him down and it was the first time that Gilbert... | ||
| I was there. | ||
| That was in San Diego. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was there ringside. | ||
| Was San Diego? | ||
| It was the first time, I think, in Strikeforce where they allowed elbows on the ground. | ||
| Because when Gilbert had been fighting before, even though he's a wrestler, he couldn't use elbows on the ground. | ||
| They had like a Pride similar rule set before the UFC bought it. | ||
| Was that San Diego or San Jose? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't remember. | ||
| I watched it on TV, I'm pretty sure. | ||
| Yeah, I remember watching it. | ||
| It was awesome. | ||
| I think it was San Diego. | ||
| Was it? | ||
| You realize how important elbows are. | ||
| Oh, game changer. | ||
| And when guys fought their whole career without elbows, and then all of a sudden they use elbows, they get more... | ||
| A guy like Gilbert, it's a huge weapon for him because he's wrestling so good. | ||
| He's so strong. | ||
| He's on top of you. | ||
| He's smashing with elbows. | ||
| It's way better than punching you, right? | ||
| And so it goes from that to... | ||
| He had a couple tough fights after that, and he just... | ||
| When you have a beatdown like that Gilbert Melendez fight. | ||
| Dude, look at Junior Dos Santos. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's just never the same. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's fighting Rothwell. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Dude, the heavyweights have some fucking fights. | ||
| We haven't even talked about it. | ||
| Orlowski, Overeem. | ||
|
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|
Jesus, yeah. | |
| They train at the same camp. | ||
| These motherfuckers said, no, neither of us are going anywhere. | ||
| We're going to train at the same camp and fight each other. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Terrible idea, fellas. | ||
| But I guess you're just coming at different times. | ||
| How do they work that? | ||
| How do you game plan it? | ||
| How's Greg Jackson game plan that? | ||
| How do you? | ||
| You've got to game plan a draw. | ||
| Yeah, what do you do? | ||
| Do you, like, each guy... | ||
| Does each guy have, like, one member of the crew he takes as his corner guy? | ||
| Training partners? | ||
| How does it work? | ||
| How does it work? | ||
| Especially heavyweights at Jackson's, you know? | ||
|
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|
Oh, shit. | |
| You're all kind of a crew. | ||
| What if they sparred? | ||
| Like, every day leading up to it? | ||
| What if they sparred to help each other get sharp to fight each other? | ||
| It'd be brilliant. | ||
| The nerves wouldn't be there as much. | ||
| Right, but who would say yes to that? | ||
| Who would say no to that? | ||
| Who would say no to that? | ||
| Overeem would probably say no to that, right? | ||
| Overeem for sure. | ||
| He's a serial killer, yeah. | ||
| But do you think Arlovsky would say no to that? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's that Russian fucking assassin. | ||
| They're both so prideful. | ||
| That's a crazy fight. | ||
| I thought Arlowski hated me forever when we traded together, but no, he's just kind of quiet. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| That's a good fight. | ||
| If they train together, how long do you think they've trained together? | ||
| How many years now? | ||
| Shit. | ||
| What, three? | ||
| Three years? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So they had to have done a lot of sports. | ||
| But if anyone's going to leave, it's going to be over because Arlowski's been there way longer. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because Overham came from the Black Zillions. | ||
| Orlowski was there four years before that. | ||
| Orlowski was there when I was there. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| And Orlowski, back when they first started working with him, everybody thought he was done. | ||
| Yeah, and this motherfucker was about to fight for a title before he fought Stipe. | ||
|
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|
So crazy. | |
| So crazy. | ||
| And then what else? | ||
| Oh, and then they're doing Verdum Stipe in Brazil. | ||
| Is what I heard. | ||
|
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This fucking show looks so bad, it looks like it's fake. | |
| Blindspot? | ||
| It really looks like it's fake. | ||
| Are you watching Better Call Saul? | ||
| No. | ||
| Is it awesome? | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| What's that on? | ||
| It's a prequel of Breaking Bad. | ||
| It's Breaking Bad, but the story of the lawyer. | ||
| I can't get into Breaking Bad. | ||
| Yeah, I don't like tweakers, man. | ||
| Oh, what was that? | ||
| I don't like tweakers. | ||
| Tweakers? | ||
| Meth heads. | ||
| Meth people who do fucking meth. | ||
| Yeah, that's what the show's about. | ||
| Did you watch all of Breaking Bad? | ||
| Did you watch all of that? | ||
| Yeah, no, I didn't watch the whole thing. | ||
| I didn't watch the end. | ||
| The end of Breaking Bad? | ||
| No, the last couple seasons. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| I can't get into it. | ||
| I watched the first two and a half. | ||
| Same thing for me. | ||
| I watched the first one and didn't start watching it for another five years. | ||
| I need a show to watch, but I need Breaking Bad. | ||
| No, but it's good. | ||
| It's really fucking good. | ||
| You're going to get addicted. | ||
| I did the same thing. | ||
| I watched the first episode, and I walked away. | ||
| I'm all set. | ||
| Teach yourselves, drugs are all set. | ||
|
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|
I'm all set. | |
| It does nothing for me, man. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| I've been bald deep in documentaries. | ||
| You know what's a great documentary that I just passed up? | ||
| There was a new release on Netflix called Cartel Land, and I thought, oh, it sounds like a cheat. | ||
| Come on, son, that's been out forever. | ||
| Dude, have you seen it? | ||
|
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|
Yes. | |
| Of course. | ||
| Goddamn American. | ||
| I almost didn't watch it because of Cartel Land. | ||
| That sounded like some B movie about some... | ||
|
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|
This isn't a spoiler alert. | |
| There's a one guy who represents the people. | ||
| He's like, we're not letting these cartel people come and take our fucking villages. | ||
| So all the civilians, he joins them. | ||
| He's like this dude with a mustache. | ||
| They leave this motherfucker mic'd up, and he's going to give a speech. | ||
| He's like, I gotta make a stop. | ||
| He goes to the side piece house, and he goes, yeah, bueno, bueno. | ||
| And this bitch just sucking his dick. | ||
| Just sucking his dick. | ||
| He comes out, he's like, alright, ready to go. | ||
| And they've been showing his wife and kids. | ||
| It's like, hey man, let's edit that shit out! | ||
| Hey, but it's the best part of the movie. | ||
| But him just going... | ||
| What is he doing? | ||
| He's not doing Gandhi shit. | ||
| He's telling everybody, everybody, we all need machine guns. | ||
| We're going to drive the cartel out of our city. | ||
| So they decided to all fucking, they got strapped. | ||
| He's a cowboy. | ||
| Is this a spoiler alert? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no, no. | |
| This is the beginning. | ||
| It's a long, dude, there's a lot of shit that happens. | ||
| This is definitely a spoiler. | ||
| It's life though, you know? | ||
| It's a guy. | ||
| He's fighting cartels. | ||
| I'm just saying he had a side piece. | ||
| They show his wife and kids the whole time. | ||
| I want to watch this thing. | ||
| I want to watch this. | ||
| Oh, it's incredible. | ||
| The basis of it, a lot of shit happens. | ||
| Did you see it? | ||
| No. | ||
| Yes, I did. | ||
| I don't want to ruin it for him completely. | ||
| No, this is the beginning. | ||
| I'm talking about the end. | ||
| It's about a guy. | ||
| It's about a guy... | ||
| Someone to get the middle for me. | ||
|
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|
...who gets his staff to fill in the middle for Joe, because you skip the beginning, the end. | |
| Bermudas and Cowiches. | ||
| The hero hooks up with his side piece at the end. | ||
| So five stars by Eddie Bravo? | ||
| How many stars? | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| One of the greatest documentaries of all goddamn time. | ||
|
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|
Eddie. | |
| That's aggressive. | ||
| It's incredible. | ||
| I give it a four out of five. | ||
| I give it a fucking nine. | ||
| Goddamn, you're crunk right now. | ||
| You're also the guy that loved the Hoist Gracie fight, though. | ||
| Yeah, let's figure that was just about to ask that. | ||
| What was Dada? | ||
| What is Dada and Kimbo? | ||
| He did everything right. | ||
| Dada and Kimbo, what was that? | ||
| Oh, that was like, they should have called it a special street match or something. | ||
| That's a strong no for me. | ||
| They should have said, okay, we're going to show this for pure entertainment value, but it's not MMA. It's just two dudes, just brawl. | ||
| You know what I say you do? | ||
| I think you put Dada and Kimbo and let Justin Redd fight both at the same time. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| If they're going to do shit shows, let's get real here. | ||
| Well, I don't think they thought that was going to be as bad as it was. | ||
| No, they thought Kimbo was going to knock me on the first round. | ||
| Well, I don't think anybody anticipated those guys would gas like that. | ||
| That was the worst gassing in the history of gassing. | ||
| If you trained some of Justin's pygmies, they would beat the show. | ||
| Rothwell, Mark Hunt's pretty bad in Denver. | ||
| Yeah, but they had a little bit of an excuse because they were fighting. | ||
| And they have better technique at least. | ||
| Yeah, they're two really high-level fighters. | ||
| Dada's titties were all over the place. | ||
| Well, Dada swung some bombs, but he just had zero in the early parts of the round before Kimbo took him down. | ||
| He just doesn't have enough gas. | ||
| Bermuda's got his back hair. | ||
| He just doesn't have any gas. | ||
| You know, I mean, who knows how he's really training? | ||
| I mean, let's be honest. | ||
| He's just not very good. | ||
| Well, you know, I mean, that's never been what he's doing, right? | ||
| He's been doing these street fights. | ||
| That's what he's been doing. | ||
| Yeah, get your paper, Doug. | ||
| I mean, I kind of get that he wants to fight and fight legitimate. | ||
| I kind of get that he's got to take that paycheck. | ||
| But I just wish he had like a real strength and conditioning coach or a real trainer. | ||
| You don't become dotted 5,000 by hiring a real strength and conditioning coach. | ||
| You don't get that haircut. | ||
| You don't get that warrior haircut. | ||
| But we're here talking about him. | ||
| He got that. | ||
| He made some money. | ||
| I'm sure he made some money. | ||
| That's all he cares about. | ||
| I think if he could fight in the backyard for the same amount of money, he's doing it. | ||
| I just wonder. | ||
| You know, you take a guy like that, and you bring him to a legit place. | ||
| How much did he make? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I kind of think he made some good money, though. | ||
| But if you take a guy like that, and you brought him to a Greg Jackson. | ||
| It's not going to be a fun story. | ||
| Or you brought him to a Mark Henry. | ||
| You don't think so? | ||
| No. | ||
| I think he gets fucking wrecked. | ||
| Maybe he just changes his attitude completely after this fight. | ||
| He gets ate up like Kobayashi. | ||
| That motherfucker gets tore the fuck up. | ||
| Yeah, but maybe he learns. | ||
| Maybe he learns how to fight. | ||
| We're not talking about him going in there and sparring with an in-prime Shane Carwin and getting fucking night night every day. | ||
| I pay good money for that. | ||
| Are you talking about the Brendan Shaw program? | ||
| The Brendan Shaw, of course. | ||
| Look at this dude. | ||
| Kawajiri's got him in a cradle. | ||
| He'll do what CM Punk has done and he'll finally realize that this isn't a fucking good idea. | ||
| This is fucking Kawajiri? | ||
| How am I missing this? | ||
| Kawajiri, he's on top here. | ||
| Especially a vet like you, right? | ||
| He was giving Dennis Bermudez a little bit of a knee to the back. | ||
| Kawajiri has some good passing. | ||
| If he gets on top, he has very solid passing. | ||
| You're talking about a pro's pro. | ||
| Are you allowed a knee in the back? | ||
| How does that work? | ||
| Not to the spine. | ||
| Yeah, the sides you can. | ||
| Yes, the sides you can, just not directly on the spine. | ||
| Hard to take down. | ||
| This guy's hard to take down. | ||
| Bermudez is a motherfucker. | ||
| So you can hit a person, like, right next to the spine. | ||
| You can hit him right next to the spine with your knees. | ||
| And when someone's on the ground, you can knee them right next to the spine. | ||
| He's got 100% on him right there. | ||
| He can flip them over easy. | ||
| Phenomenal takedown. | ||
| Oh, he let it go. | ||
| He's going to keep scrambling. | ||
| Good luck getting Brimia's down. | ||
| See that 100%? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| Damn. | ||
|
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|
You pray for those positions right there. | |
| Vampire fangs. | ||
| I was going to say, where do you get that? | ||
| Pretty badass. | ||
| Fancy. | ||
| Oh, there it is. | ||
| Yeah, see? | ||
| But some referees will warn you if you get too close to the spine. | ||
| We can't go 12 to 6 on the spine. | ||
| You can't go 12 to 6 anywhere. | ||
| Even on the thighs, they warn you about that. | ||
| But it's weird because you can if you're on the bottom of guard. | ||
| Yes, but it's not because it's going 6 to 12. Yes. | ||
|
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|
You're going in this motion instead of this motion. | |
| It's so fucking stupid. | ||
| It's like if you jerk off knuckles up, is it really jerking off? | ||
| Who does that? | ||
| Not in my book. | ||
| Who's jerking off like that? | ||
| I've tried it. | ||
| It's very rare. | ||
| When you're trying to lube it up, I guess you do it. | ||
| Damn, Kawajiri's relentless with his takedowns here. | ||
| But not during the actual process. | ||
| The climax process. | ||
| Dude, how hard is Bermuda to get down? | ||
| There's only one way. | ||
| That's why our hands are shaped this way. | ||
| Can you imagine during the climax part, you're going like this? | ||
| Imagine the only way to get yourself to come, you gotta hit it. | ||
| Just smack it. | ||
| You don't have to? | ||
| You've seen the fucking B&E Pain Olympics and stuff, right? | ||
| I'm just checking. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, I have. | ||
| Some people love pain, man. | ||
| I don't like pain at all. | ||
| Don't fucking touch me. | ||
| I don't understand that. | ||
| In any facet. | ||
| Tattoos, I suck at that. | ||
| You know, you meet people that are into pain. | ||
| There's people that like to get suspended. | ||
| You ever see that shit? | ||
| They put hooks in their back? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| They hang him like fish. | ||
| Do you think that maybe they feel pain in a different way? | ||
| Like maybe what you feel, what they feel is different? | ||
| Releases in different endorphins? | ||
| I've always wondered that because, you know, people talk about like pain tolerance. | ||
| Like, oh, this guy's got a really high pain tolerance and she's got a really high, you know, he loves pain. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What are they feeling? | ||
| We assume... | ||
| I assume that when someone does something to you, it feels the same as it is to me, but it's clearly different. | ||
| Yeah, there's no way. | ||
| There's no way. | ||
| Otherwise, why do girls like getting spanked? | ||
| How come some girls... | ||
| That's a dominant thing, though, right? | ||
| Some girls love it. | ||
| I think that's leftover caveman shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| They love it. | ||
| They like to get spanked. | ||
| Spanked, choked. | ||
| Thanks, 50 shades of hair. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A little hair pull. | |
| That's what that shit is. | ||
| Generally, right? | ||
| Or gagging with a good spit... | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| They like it a little bit. | ||
| That's leftover kid man shit. | ||
| But let's be real about this shit. | ||
| If a girl spanks you, it's going to be a fucking real problem. | ||
| Yeah, you should have died. | ||
| If a girl spanks you the way she's asking you to spank her, if she starts spanking you that way, you'd be like, hey, hey, hey, what the fuck are you doing? | ||
| Yeah, that's embarrassing. | ||
| Slow down. | ||
| Slow down. | ||
| Don't shit me. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| My reaction to... | ||
| I tell them free enough. | ||
| I go, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| There's not going to be any of that right away. | ||
| It depends how hot they are. | ||
| It depends how hot they are. | ||
| Right there. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| Nah, I gotta go full Delahoya, man. | ||
| If they're really hot, I'll put on some stockings and shit, whatever they want. | ||
| It's very important that you nip that right in the bud. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Full Delahoya. | |
| It's not gonna be scratching. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay, fine. | |
| He was in stockings and fucking shoes. | ||
| He had the high heels on and shit. | ||
| Cocaine's a hell of a drug. | ||
| Cocaine is a hell of a drug. | ||
| How about the girls that like to scratch? | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| You better stop that shit right now. | ||
| Don't you think that a lot of that is marking you? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Marking you? | ||
| What the fuck are you doing? | ||
| To let everybody know that she fucked you, you know, to mark her territory, scratch you, leave marks on you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Like a hickey? | |
| Did you ever give hickeys? | ||
| Oh yeah, high school. | ||
| Everybody gave hickeys in high school. | ||
| You come to school, wow, you just got a hickey. | ||
| Hey, that was a great idea if you think about it. | ||
| Always give hickeys. | ||
| It's gone though, right? | ||
| When's the last time you saw someone with a hickey? | ||
| Yeah, that's gone away. | ||
| People don't do that shit anymore. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's gross. | |
| It's gross. | ||
| Hey, but it is a good way to keep... | ||
| Kids are like, I'm gonna get in fucking trouble for this. | ||
| Why would I do this? | ||
| Yeah, why are you bruising up my neck? | ||
| I guess it's embarrassing now. | ||
| Yo, oh shit. | ||
| Kawajiri is tired as fuck. | ||
| Kawajiri trying to spin. | ||
| A lot of work trying to get him to the ground, man. | ||
| Yeah, he's exhausted. | ||
| He's a big dude, too. | ||
| Look at that, though. | ||
| That's hard. | ||
| Get out of here, son. | ||
| Oh, and back in there. | ||
| Man, he is so hard to take down. | ||
| How about you, Kawajiri gets TKO'd? | ||
| He looks very tired here, I'll tell you that. | ||
| You gotta wonder also, with a guy like Kawajiri, how old is he now? | ||
| Between the two of them, don't they have like 60 fights or 70 fights or something like that? | ||
| He's only 29? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, he's every bit of 44. Jamie, find out how old Kawajiri is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
In fighting years, he's 67. Yeah, he's older. | |
| Asians, you can't tell? | ||
| Let me guess before you tell me. | ||
| 35. I see. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'll say 37. 39. Okay. | |
| Drum roll, please. | ||
| Ian? | ||
| 36. 37. I'm going to say 36 and 39. I'm going to say 36 and 39. 36 and 39. It's either a 6 or a 9. Asians, you can't tell. | ||
| Asians or black guys, you cannot tell. | ||
| It's like that Jimi Hendrix song. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| 37! | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Oh, so between 36 and 39. I was off. | ||
| Yeah, but you were in the wheelhouse. | ||
| Yeah, whatever. | ||
| 39. He'd been fighting for a long time, too. | ||
| A long, long time. | ||
| It's hard, man. | ||
| A few of those brutal KOs like this guy's experienced, like especially the Melendez fight. | ||
| How many other times has he KO'd? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Who wins a fight like this? | ||
| If it goes like this all three rounds, a dude... | ||
| Cow Jerry. | ||
| He wins because he's pressing forward? | ||
| He's aggressive. | ||
| Yeah, maybe. | ||
| Or is that aggressive? | ||
| It depends on the judging. | ||
| He's getting fucked up here. | ||
| He's getting the fucking shit elbowed out of him here. | ||
| So we didn't consider a takedown when Bermudez was on his hip getting up? | ||
| Some of the fucking idiot refs do. | ||
| Yeah, but Bermudez is controlling him here. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Bermudez is on top, and he's landing strikes, and Kawagiri literally can't do shit. | ||
| He's in the shot. | ||
| He's in the shot. | ||
| Yeah, but that's no good. | ||
| He's on his knees. | ||
| He's getting fucked up. | ||
| But he's going into him. | ||
| Right, but look how Bermudez is controlling that right arm. | ||
| They're there because Kawagiri is making that happen. | ||
| Yes, but he's stuck. | ||
| Look, Bermudez is controlling that right arm with that wrap. | ||
| Bermudez is so progressive. | ||
| They're beating the fuck out of him here. | ||
| I'm definitely giving these exchanges right here to Bermudez because Kawagiri is only holding on and it ain't working. | ||
| Take his back? | ||
| And now he's about to get fucked up. | ||
| Ready for that TKO, son? | ||
| See, I get that you're saying that Kawagiri is moving forward, but the way Dennis was countering was so much more powerful than what Kawagiri was doing. | ||
| I agree with you. | ||
| I'm saying in the first round, Joe. | ||
| That's why I brought it up. | ||
| He is pushing him, but he's getting fucked up at the same time. | ||
| Who do you give that to? | ||
| The first round, Kawagiri. | ||
| Even though he didn't... | ||
| Get the successful takedown. | ||
| Yeah, I see it as, yeah, he's pushing forward. | ||
| It's not effective. | ||
| And the reason he's pushing forward is he doesn't want none of the stand-up. | ||
| But even when he's pushing forward, though, he was underneath. | ||
| He was underneath the leg. | ||
| He had his arm tied up like this. | ||
| See how Bermudez loves to tie that wrist up on the far side? | ||
| That's Ryan Parsons. | ||
| That's all Ryan Parsons. | ||
| And he is just beating the shit out of him here. | ||
| I mean, there's a number of unanswered shots. | ||
| Oh, Twister. | ||
| That'd be sick. | ||
| No, that's not going to happen. | ||
| What? | ||
| I'm trying. | ||
| What does he do? | ||
| He just wants to take the back. | ||
| Bermuda's just dominating right now. | ||
| He's got his back. | ||
| He's going to flatten him out. | ||
| Bermuda looks awesome. | ||
| Did Kawajiri beat Gomi? | ||
| Or no, Gomi beat him in Pride, right? | ||
| That's how there was Sakurai. | ||
| Sakurai? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's what I'm thinking of. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's Ron Parsons. | ||
| He's screaming at him. | ||
| He's screaming at him. | ||
| Ryan Parsons, he's all about wrist control. | ||
| Him and Pat Cummins. | ||
| Smart. | ||
| That's all he does, man. | ||
| Well, especially from those positions, you see, like, as he's moving in for that shot, controlling that right wrist, he was able to land so many hard shots. | ||
| Just gives you so much control. | ||
| How many hard elbows did he land from that position? | ||
| It had to be, like, ten, right? | ||
| At least. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| At least. | ||
| Ten hard ones. | ||
| So when you think about that, like, just the impact of that as he goes back to his round, he's definitely diminished from that, big time. | ||
| What's his corner tone? | ||
| That was a bad scene. | ||
| Yeah, whatever. | ||
| May I go in there, brother? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You want one? | |
| No, no, I'm good. | ||
| I'm good. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I'll take one. | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
| Brendan Schaub had a baby. | ||
| We'll have a beer. | ||
| Celebration beer. | ||
| We'll celebrate. | ||
| This is a celebration, bitches. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Yeah, Jamie can drink. | ||
| Let me ask you this, Joe. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| If you're Cowboy Olivia's corner man and the fight's five rounds, you know what I'm saying, Joe? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And the fight's five rounds. | ||
| You're not going to have a game plan for five rounds, right? | ||
| You're going to say, the first round, give it hell, man. | ||
| Then after that, it's whatever. | ||
| I would assume they would try to do that because that's where Cowboy's had problems in the past. | ||
| Guys jump on him and he's taking the fight on short donors. | ||
| Don't let Cowboy get into rhythm because he's going to fuck you up. | ||
| You blitz his ass. | ||
| How many weeks did Oliveira have to prepare for this? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Two weeks. | |
| That's it. | ||
| He just fought not too long ago, though. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Well, there you go. | ||
| That could be... | ||
| Still, five-round fight. | ||
| I'm gonna fuck who you are. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Two weeks ain't ready. | |
| This fight's still going on. | ||
| Kawajiri, and look at this. | ||
| Bermudez is attacking now. | ||
| Can I get one of the other ones? | ||
| Yo, dude, how badass was that Jeremy Stephens? | ||
| I'll drink that. | ||
| I like that stuff. | ||
| Give me the Guinness. | ||
| That's a grown-ass man drink. | ||
| I'm not ready for it. | ||
| Even though I'm a dad now. | ||
| This is probably bad for my low-carbohydrate diet. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| Probably not supposed to drink these. | ||
| How's that work? | ||
| Cheers, brother. | ||
| You can't drink a beer. | ||
| You gotta get off that fucking diet. | ||
| Hey, bro. | ||
| Can I have a... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can't drink beer. | |
| How long is that gonna last? | ||
| I have a penis, so I can drink it. | ||
| I'm only trying to do it. | ||
| I'm not trying to live on it. | ||
| I'm trying to do it for 60 days. | ||
| Salute, my brother. | ||
| How many days are you in, Joe? | ||
| Hey, congratulations on that day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thanks, fellas. | |
| It's gonna fuck. | ||
| Every day gets better and better, dude. | ||
| Hopefully. | ||
| It just gets better and better. | ||
| Hopefully. | ||
| Yeah, no, it's gonna be better. | ||
| If I can do it, you can do it. | ||
| That's your creation right there. | ||
| That's the most important thing in your life. | ||
| No, I watch 16 and pregnant. | ||
| If those fucking morons can do it, I'm gonna be fine. | ||
| Well, for sure, don't let those be your role models. | ||
| No, I'm just saying, that's the standard. | ||
| And I'm like, I'm way cooler than them. | ||
| You can read books on it. | ||
| You got a mother-in-law that's huge. | ||
| That's that Latin family, son. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Huge. | |
| But it's only hard for two years, two and a half years. | ||
| After that, you talk to them. | ||
| That's a really long time. | ||
| That's like... | ||
| No, listen, man. | ||
| It's not a long time for your legacy, dude. | ||
| Even then, it's awesome. | ||
| Trust me. | ||
| Oh, no, I can't wait. | ||
| I love kids. | ||
| It's not like you have to suffer for two and a half years before they become awesome. | ||
| I want to be like Sean Camp, man. | ||
| Just a ton of kids. | ||
| It makes you a better person. | ||
| It really does. | ||
| I'm hoping it chills me out. | ||
| I can't relax with the work. | ||
| I shouldn't say it makes you a better person, but it makes a lot of people a better person because they become way more considerate. | ||
| And they start looking at the world differently. | ||
| We all know intellectually what it's like. | ||
| You have a baby, the baby becomes a person, and there it goes. | ||
| But when you actually see it happen, then you start to piece it together. | ||
| Everything this person is, really, is because of all the interactions that he's experienced while I've been his dad. | ||
| And that's what you're going to start doing. | ||
| You're a great guy already, man. | ||
| It's going to make you even more awesome. | ||
| I guarantee you. | ||
| Yeah, I'm excited. | ||
| Yeah, you're going to be great at this, man. | ||
| You're going to love it. | ||
| I know you will. | ||
| I can't wait. | ||
| You're going to love it. | ||
| When you live your life, now all of a sudden there's someone that you'll die for and you'll kill for. | ||
| It's different. | ||
| All of a sudden, you're not number one no more. | ||
| That kid's number one. | ||
| He's worth more to you than you are. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Now that changes your life. | ||
| Now all of a sudden you're number two. | ||
| You got a number one that you got to protect. | ||
| You know what it really changes? | ||
| It changes your feeling of compassion too. | ||
| You have more compassion for people because you see people that are grown up and you go, oh, somewhere along the line this fucking dude was a baby and someone did a terrible job of raising this fucking kid and now here he is 25 and drunk and stupid and in my face. | ||
| Explains a lot, yeah. | ||
| It puts it together to you in a way that it never did before. | ||
| Before I would meet people and I'd go, oh, this guy's an asshole. | ||
| You know, oh, she's a bitch. | ||
| But now I go, oh, those were babies. | ||
| This is a baby that just got railroaded the wrong way. | ||
| The whole deal. | ||
| And then you meet someone who's a really cool person. | ||
| And you go, oh, well, you must have had a cool ride. | ||
| Yeah, what was your childhood like? | ||
| You always want to know, like, where'd you grow up? | ||
| How did you get through it? | ||
| What do your parents do? | ||
| My girl's family being Latin, man, there's so much love. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Don't get me wrong, my parents love the shit out of me, but, you know, the Latin family's just different. | ||
| Yeah, Donald Trump. | ||
| Trying to keep that out? | ||
| Trying to keep love out? | ||
| Yeah, Donald. | ||
| That's so stupid. | ||
| Shit, he won South Carolina. | ||
| Did he? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Of course he did. | ||
| Look who he's against. | ||
| He's against nothing. | ||
| Dude, how crazy. | ||
| It's going to be him versus Hillary. | ||
| Oh, 100%. | ||
| You think Hillary's going to beat Ben Sanders? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bernie's in trouble. | |
| Bernie won New Hampshire, but New Hampshire is a very small state in the New England area. | ||
| They're very liberal. | ||
| New England's liberal in general, and he's like You know, he's a radical socialist. | ||
| He's got this socialist, democratic socialist agenda that a lot of people are like, hey, let's try that. | ||
| It's better than what we're dealing with now, these capitalist cunts that are stealing, just looking at the stock market, just looking at the financial district, just looking at the way they're moving numbers around and the fucking Wall Street crash of 2008. Obviously, there's a bunch of criminals that are running things. | ||
| And they're just extracting money from this goofy, abstract system that hardly anybody understands. | ||
| So having a guy like him come along, a lot of people, including me, go, it's probably the best thing to happen. | ||
| So you throw a little mix-me-up in there. | ||
| See what the fuck happens. | ||
| I'm not mad at the Trump curveball. | ||
| I'm not talking about Trump. | ||
| I'm talking about Bernie Sanders. | ||
| Yeah, Bernie Sanders or Trump curveball is interesting, too. | ||
| Super interesting. | ||
| You're talking about a complete wild card. | ||
| You're telling me those are the two best America has to offer? | ||
| The smart people don't run for it. | ||
| Fuck that noise. | ||
| I don't want that bullshit. | ||
| Too much side pussy going on. | ||
| Too much bueno. | ||
| Real quick. | ||
| You're going to want that part. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude! | |
| Another documentary. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's a hero. | |
| He gets his dick sucked. | ||
| He's like going to this protest. | ||
| He's like, hold on, let me pull off real quick. | ||
| I was like, what's up, girl? | ||
| Yeah, it's the best. | ||
| He does it in the most suave Latin guy thing. | ||
| He's like, hola, over the fence. | ||
| You know, he's talking to her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We talked about running away with her and shit, leaving his family? | |
| Maybe. | ||
| I'd be right back. | ||
| It's the best. | ||
| We need Chael to run for president because Chael would fight any other president and beat him up. | ||
| Putin would be a good fight. | ||
| You know who would be a real president, who really could be a president? | ||
| Stan. | ||
| Brian Stan. | ||
| I knew you were going to say that. | ||
| He really could do it. | ||
| He really could do it. | ||
| Vice President Tim Kennedy. | ||
| For reals. | ||
| Enjoy that ISIS. Break glass in case of war. | ||
| For real. | ||
| For real. | ||
| I'll fucking vote for that in a heartbeat. | ||
| Anything Tim does, I'm on board. | ||
| You know what the real problem of being a president is? | ||
| Nobody can do it. | ||
| That's the real problem. | ||
| It's a stupid job that no one can do. | ||
| No one should have the job. | ||
| It shouldn't exist anymore. | ||
| It's antiquated. | ||
| And the only way we're going to realize that is there's going to be no one running. | ||
| It's going to be like 20, 30 years from now, no one's going to run for president. | ||
| It's not going to make a difference. | ||
| Some homeless guy in a goat? | ||
| You know, real quick documentary. | ||
| This is one that I've watched over and over. | ||
| It's really, really good. | ||
| If you say it's the best of all time, I'm going to freak out. | ||
| No, it's not. | ||
| It's not. | ||
| But it's really, really good. | ||
| Especially for conspiracy theorist type. | ||
| It's called How Big Oil Conquered the World. | ||
| It's how it all started back in the mid-1800s. | ||
| How it all started with John D. Rockefeller. | ||
| And you always hear about the Rockefellers. | ||
| Oh, they own everything. | ||
| Or the Rothschilds. | ||
| Oh, they're the bankers. | ||
| They own everything. | ||
| But to actually find out how he was raised, John Rockefeller, and how evil his dad was, and this is all like, you know, public knowledge. | ||
| It's fucking amazing how the birth of oil in the United States, this documentary is called about the birth of oil, and how it came in and infected all our lives, and how John Rockefeller monopolized Dude, I got another one for you, and it's your boy, that Prescription Thugs. | ||
| That's a good doc. | ||
| Some crazy shit. | ||
| That's all John Rockefeller. | ||
| Dude, he controlled big pharma, he controlled our educational system, everything. | ||
| One dude, the first billionaire, one dude controlled everything. | ||
| This Prescription Thugs is some shit. | ||
| Yeah, I've heard. | ||
| I can't wait. | ||
| Same guy, he did Trophy Kids. | ||
| Have you seen Trophy Kids? | ||
| I have not. | ||
| Watch that. | ||
| That's the way he did it. | ||
| Bigger, Faster, Stronger, too. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He does really good stuff. | ||
| What's it called again? | ||
| Prescription Thugs. | ||
| That sounds fucking scary as shit. | ||
| I've seen Trophy Kids and Bigger, Faster, Stronger. | ||
| Netflix? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| It just came out. | ||
| Oh, I know. | ||
| Dude, there's one. | ||
| I know I'm all over the place. | ||
| But there's one. | ||
| Vice had a thing on people taking their own lives. | ||
| And I think there's eight states in the United States. | ||
| Fucking vice. | ||
| I don't know how this journalist got this job. | ||
| This old bitch is like, yeah, I'm trying to go, man. | ||
| They film it. | ||
| I was in bed 10 o'clock at night. | ||
| I gotta watch this bitch die. | ||
| It was nuts, man. | ||
| Did you freak out? | ||
| I was in a weird space, man. | ||
| I was in a weird space because her whole family's there, and she has this disease where it's not going to get better. | ||
| She's going to forget everyone. | ||
| There's no cure. | ||
| It's done-zo. | ||
| And so she talked to this lady, gets approved. | ||
| Lady comes over. | ||
| She's like, yeah, that's my coffin there. | ||
| You guys want coffee? | ||
| She's all happy. | ||
| And then her family comes. | ||
| They all hug her and they all, have a safe trip. | ||
| She's like, thanks. | ||
| Danka. | ||
| She keeps going, Danka, Danka. | ||
| Lays down and everyone's like, see you soon. | ||
| She's like, yes. | ||
| Injector and done. | ||
| It's like, hey, HBO, I'm not ready for this shit, man. | ||
| Fucked my whole night up. | ||
| Check it out, though. | ||
| It's the new Vice. | ||
| Pretty dope. | ||
| Vice is a crazy fucking show. | ||
| I watched one episode. | ||
| I don't remember what country they were in, but they were all wearing bulletproof vests, and they were moving from one set of broken-down, rocket-shelled buildings to the next, and they're moving around somewhere in the Middle East. | ||
| And I'm watching this, and I'm like, fuck this. | ||
| This job. | ||
| If you're over there and then one guy would come to the camera trying to explain, well, the rebels are about three kilometers away and we have to stay down because they have been shooting. | ||
| Like, what the fuck are you talking about, man? | ||
| The balls do that job. | ||
| Dude, that's like the James Foley documentary on HBO. You know the guy, Jim Foley, the guy who got caught by ISIS? He's a prisoner of war, and he got... | ||
| Jim. | ||
| Jim, who got decapitated on... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a documentary on him, and he's a frontline journalist. | ||
| It's fucking nuts, man. | ||
| He already got caught and got out and then went back, and then ISIS was like, yo, Doug, it's just too easy. | ||
| One of our biggest fears is the end of the world. | ||
| The end of the world for us. | ||
| The end of civilization. | ||
| There's countries out there where it is already the end of civilization. | ||
| It's already over. | ||
| You go to Liberia, it's done. | ||
| If the world economy collapses and its fucking zombies come out and all that shit, nothing changes in Liberia. | ||
| It's the same fucking shit. | ||
| It's already the end of the world. | ||
| Have you seen the documentaries on Liberia from Vice? | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| Captain Butt Naked. | ||
| Yeah, that's the greatest. | ||
| Dude, I can't get enough of them. | ||
| General butt naked. | ||
| It's the end of the goddamn world over there. | ||
| Nothing changes there. | ||
| How about when he caught people eating human flesh on the corner and the reason why he knew the guy was selling human flesh because he knew what it tasted like. | ||
| He didn't eat it before. | ||
| Mark Coleman. | ||
| The world is some crazy shit, man. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Because I'll get done watching that shit like in Syria and Kenya, all that stuff, and then you're in this cushy home in LA. It's like, what the fuck? | ||
| How long would it take if all the power went out? | ||
| Like, how long would it take before some people started killing and eating people? | ||
| Six months? | ||
| It wouldn't even take that long. | ||
| You don't think six months? | ||
| No. | ||
| You don't think we'd rob all the 7-Elevens first? | ||
| If we all ran out of food and you had this one asshole that you really fucking hated, you'd love to eat his leg. | ||
| Yes, the more you hate a guy, the tastier he looks. | ||
| Make some chili. | ||
| Keep talking, motherfucker. | ||
| Talking about some zombie shit now. | ||
| They definitely did that back in the day, man. | ||
| I mean, they definitely did that back in the day to intimidate the enemy in various cultures. | ||
| They would kill you and eat. | ||
| On islands and shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, the Samoans and Tongans. | ||
| I don't think... | ||
| Did Vikings cannibalize? | ||
| I think it was like a thing back in the day. | ||
| How about Kevin Randall? | ||
| That's fucking sad. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I was with him on Saturday. | ||
| I was at the Super Bowl party with him, and then I looked online the next day. | ||
| I was like, fuck. | ||
| And he was all good at the Super Bowl party? | ||
| Yeah, he was just coughing a lot, which obviously was a pneumonia. | ||
| Dude, he had the most potential ever. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| His wrestling, I mean, Chuck Liddell said he was the best, in his opinion, he said, best wrestler in college history. | ||
| That's what Chuck Liddell said. | ||
| That was his opinion. | ||
| He was so happy. | ||
| And I've known him for maybe, we're not like good friends, but I've known him for 10 years and I see him once a year. | ||
| It's one of those things you have mutual respect because he's fucking Kevin Randleman. | ||
| Talking to him and then he's talking about his queen, his wife, how awesome she was. | ||
| I mean, I met my girlfriend and then he's talking about his four-year-old son. | ||
| What a freak, though. | ||
| Athletically, they say he's like the best athlete to come to the UFC. No, he knocked out Krokop. | ||
| Man, if he would've just got good at passing guard and mounting and taking backs. | ||
| Can you imagine that? | ||
| Kevin Roundman, if he would've got obsessed, and I've had several talks with him, say, get good at passing the guard and mounting and taking backs. | ||
| You'll be un-fucking-stoppable. | ||
| He was jacked. | ||
| He was the first guy that flatlined Krokop in pride. | ||
| From across the ring. | ||
| Super nice guy, man. | ||
| The speed and power that guy had. | ||
| He was a real nice guy. | ||
| He was fun to be around, too. | ||
| He was real jovial. | ||
| Young Mark Coleman. | ||
| So not a dick. | ||
| So not a dick. | ||
| He was never a dick. | ||
| Ever. | ||
| So cool. | ||
| He was on my podcast this week. | ||
| He was talking about being in a hotel elevator with him the day before they fought. | ||
| And he said, good luck. | ||
| And Kevin said, good luck back to him. | ||
| And Kevin said, I'll make you a deal. | ||
| If you don't kick me, I promise to keep this on the feet. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Damn, that's nuts. | ||
| And Boss broke it, like, immediately. | ||
| He said Randallman started slapping his leg. | ||
| And he felt like he was saying, like, kick me and I'll take you down. | ||
| You know, like, he was trying to figure out what it is. | ||
| So he said, and then I faked through the leg and go with the front kick to the face. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then he took him down a lot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| He's a great guy, man. | ||
| It'd be good to get a CT scan of Randleman's brain, because we don't have a lot of knowledge on that, on MMA fighters' brains, huh? | ||
| That's a really good point. | ||
| I wonder if they were interested in doing that, because his family should. | ||
| Is it too late? | ||
| Probably. | ||
| I don't know how it works, but there's not a... | ||
| You know, MMA's so young, a lot of them don't die, and he's a legend. | ||
| He has a lot of fights, so it'd be good to get just to see what's going on with a lot of guys' brains. | ||
| I wonder if anybody's brought that up, because it's hard without being disrespectful or perceiving... | ||
| That you are disrespectful, saying something like that. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| You think that's disrespectful? | ||
| No, I definitely don't. | ||
| Oh, I'm not trying to be disrespectful at all. | ||
| I don't think you are at all. | ||
| We're in the know that we understand. | ||
| Asking that question would be hard. | ||
| Some people might have a hard time with their kid just dying. | ||
| Or their husband just dying. | ||
| Because like Junior Seau, the guy who was literally my hero growing up as a kid, shot himself in the chest. | ||
| And the reason he shot himself in the chest, he was like, you guys need to study my brain, man. | ||
| I've had so many concussions. | ||
| They just said he wasn't the same guy. | ||
| Did he kill himself? | ||
| Yeah, shot himself in the chest. | ||
| I didn't know that. | ||
| When was that? | ||
| Three, four years ago, buddy? | ||
| Junior Seau? | ||
| Favorite athlete of all time. | ||
| Fucking shit, I didn't know that. | ||
| They said from so many concussions, like, his getaway was the ocean. | ||
| Like, he would get in the ocean, he was the happiest guy ever, had a great family, lived on the beach in Oceanside, and then he said all of a sudden, something kicked in and he wasn't happy anywhere. | ||
| Anywhere. | ||
| He'd fake it everywhere. | ||
| Then he'd go home, couldn't sleep, super depressed. | ||
| Bummer, man. | ||
| But again, the NFL's been around for so long, he gave his brain, right? | ||
| And they're like, yeah, CT, like a motherfucker. | ||
| So I'm not saying Roman has anything, but he's one of the legends with all these fights, who find pride, UFC, who we can actually see what the brain looks like. | ||
| Step in the right direction. | ||
| It's a good start. | ||
| Heavy combo, fellas, sorry. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's important, though. | ||
| What you're saying is important. | ||
| It's important to think about, and it probably would have been a good idea. | ||
| I mean, who knows? | ||
| We don't know. | ||
| Maybe somebody else had brought that up. | ||
| But I don't know. | ||
| I hadn't thought about it. | ||
| All I had thought about was like, wow, the guy was only like, I think he was 44. 44. You know what's crazy? | ||
| That's the first thing I thought about. | ||
| Yeah, it wasn't that old, man. | ||
| But like you said, it might be disrespectful. | ||
| Heart failure? | ||
| You had pneumonia and then, right, you had complications and we went to the hospital. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Fuck. | ||
| Who brought the bad news beer? | ||
| A lot of people are fucking dying, right? | ||
| It doesn't seem like... | ||
| Dude, in music, people, they're starting to drop off. | ||
| Rock stars are starting to drop off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Lemmy for Motorhead, David Bowie. | ||
| You can't party that hard. | ||
| And miscellaneous guys, too, like guys that weren't that famous, like Jimmy Bane, the bass player for Dio. | ||
| They're slowly, boom. | ||
| Dude, I forgot. | ||
| It's that time. | ||
| All those years of partying in the 70s and 80s, You're starting to pay right now. | ||
| It's going to get you. | ||
| They're going to start dropping. | ||
| But it's kind of worth it, isn't it? | ||
| To live those glory years for about 15 years. | ||
| Are you kidding? | ||
| You know what's crazy? | ||
| It's all fucked up. | ||
| You know, that metal was huge in the 80s. | ||
| Hair metal and all that shit. | ||
| Guns N' Roses and Motley Crue. | ||
| And then died a horrible vanilla ice type death in the 90s and shit. | ||
| And in the 2000s. | ||
| But guess fucking what, dude? | ||
| Guess what? | ||
| It's back. | ||
| It's coming back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's back, motherfucker. | |
| Clems and Roses doing... | ||
| Tours. | ||
| Selling out tours. | ||
| First of all, Motley Crue playing a couple nights at the Staples Center. | ||
| Come on, that's fucking incredible. | ||
| They couldn't do that 10 years ago. | ||
| But Kiss is still doing the damn thing too. | ||
| Kiss is beyond all that. | ||
| They've been doing that shit forever. | ||
| Yeah, Kiss is different. | ||
| That's a whole different thing. | ||
| Dude, Rolling Stones though. | ||
| No, Rolling Stones never went down. | ||
| They never went down. | ||
| I'm talking about metal. | ||
| Guns N' Roses went fucking down. | ||
| Now, they're putting together that. | ||
| Finally! | ||
| They're putting together. | ||
| You know how big that Guns N' Roses reunion tour is going to be? | ||
| It's going to finally Slash and Axl made up and they said, let's do this. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That's going to be fucking neat. | ||
| All that shit's coming back. | ||
| Hopefully. | ||
| For them, for Cousin and Rose. | ||
| I've never seen you take a piss during a podcast ever. | ||
| Yeah, that's why I figured everybody's here. | ||
| Why not? | ||
| A lot of people talking. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's a good time. | |
| It's the diet, bro. | ||
| I could hold it. | ||
| Oh shit, here we go. | ||
| Cody and Ta King-ho. | ||
| Yeah, I could totally hold it if I wanted to. | ||
| I've never seen it. | ||
| I know how to do it. | ||
| You're like a little camel, you know? | ||
| I do have a weird bladder now. | ||
| But I think I trained it over six years of doing podcasts. | ||
| I got the bladder. | ||
| It's all stretched out. | ||
| Yeah, it must be. | ||
| It's like an old hooker's pussy. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| It's just super pliable. | ||
| What's up, James? | ||
| I saw a trailer for John Travolta's new movie because this Arnold Schwarzenegger thing just made me think of it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, it looks so bad. | |
| Oh, really? | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's like the Punisher, kind of. | |
| Oh, fuck off. | ||
| It's called I Am Wrath. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, no. | |
| Bro, but do you see him? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| I heard he's awesome in the OJ show. | ||
| That's what I was going to say. | ||
| John Travolta and OJ as Shapiro is the shit. | ||
| They were playing the OJ show at the Comedy Store yesterday and everybody was raving about it. | ||
| I was like, really? | ||
| It's good, but it's like Law and Order, but nothing happens. | ||
| I heard Cuba Gooding Jr. is the shit. | ||
| Oh, see, he's my only problem. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, he's not that good. | ||
| Everyone else is the Bond. | ||
| Everyone else is spot on. | ||
| And then Cuban Union Jr. looks nothing like O.J. Well, he looks nothing like him, but I heard his acting... | ||
| Well, you kind of get a good actor, though. | ||
| And what good actor looks exactly like O.J.? None. | ||
| So you're going to take another guy and put him in prosthetics? | ||
| My boy who did... | ||
| Whoa, that would be kind of creepy, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
That would be fucking weird. | |
| That would be creepy as fuck. | ||
| Robert Downey Jr. did it! | ||
| Idris Elba, they couldn't get him, because he's too big in the movies. | ||
| I mean, he's James Bond now. | ||
| But someone of that ilk, who's that good, and then you give him some crazy prosthetics. | ||
| He goes blackface? | ||
| No, he's black already. | ||
| But you let him do a fucking Daniel Day-Lewis, where he just lives like that guy for a year, and he puts on the prosthetic, and like, is OJ? That would freak people the fuck out. | ||
| Bro, I'm saying, you get Robert Downey Jr. does blackface as OJ Simpson. | ||
| He's already done in Tropic Thunder, and he's so good. | ||
| He's like one of the only white guys who's ever pulled off blackface in a comedy. | ||
| What movie was funnier than Tropic Thunder? | ||
| Name one movie funnier than Tropic Thunder. | ||
| I don't think there's ever been a movie that was funnier, but that was about as funny as a movie. | ||
| Dude, come on! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Scene after, scene after, scene after, scene after, scene after, scene after. | |
| Come on! | ||
| That was the funniest shit ever! | ||
| I'm black. | ||
| He went full retard? | ||
| Come on, that scene? | ||
| You never go full retard. | ||
| You never go full retard. | ||
| That's like one of the greatest internet memes of all time. | ||
| That may be one of the funniest scenes. | ||
| It's his best acting job of all time. | ||
| He played a black guy in... | ||
| Come on. | ||
| But a solid black guy. | ||
| It was fucking money. | ||
| God damn, that was a good movie. | ||
| How about the scene where Jack Black was tied to... | ||
| He told everyone, tie me to a fucking tree. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And don't let me talk you into letting me out. | |
| That scene where he's offering to suck the dude's dick. | ||
| He goes, come on. | ||
| Let me swallow the gravy. | ||
| Let me swallow the gravy. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Just bring it over here. | ||
| Swallow the gravy. | ||
| And then that gay black guy goes, I told you, man. | ||
| I'm into pussy. | ||
| I love that movie, man. | ||
| Come on! | ||
| I love it. | ||
| Al Pacino, baby! | ||
| One thing I'll never forget about that movie, the impression left on me when I'm like, okay, you hear it's good, and you go to the movies, I'm at the movie theater, I'm watching it, and in the beginning, when they blow that fucking director's head off, and you see, right there, I thought, oh, shit! | ||
| You're in some shit. | ||
| Yes! | ||
|
unidentified
|
They blew that guy's head off! | |
| They blew his head off! | ||
| I'm like, this is going to be an amazing movie. | ||
| Dude, how good was Tom Cruise as the fat agent? | ||
| Oh my god, it was amazing. | ||
| The dancing and all that? | ||
| It was amazing. | ||
| It might be the best movie of all time. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| It might be the best movie of all time. | ||
| You know the craziest thing about that movie is every character, I think the only movie ever, where every character was a douchebag. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nobody was cool! | |
| Nobody! | ||
| Everybody was a douchebag! | ||
| There was no cool people. | ||
| It was making fun of the Simple Jacks. | ||
| Can you find that scene where Jack Black is tied to a tree? | ||
| He's tied to a tree begging for a blowjob. | ||
| Simple Jack! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Simple Jack! | |
| Dude, Ben Stiller, his character was the ultimate douchebag. | ||
| Oh, the best. | ||
| He was like the... | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Here's your boy. | ||
| Here's your jiu-jitsu boy. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Takino. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| This is Takino, and then Hussimar Paul Harris is Tokino. | ||
| Very similar. | ||
| Yeah, what is the difference? | ||
| One is Tankino at Little Tank, I think. | ||
| And the other one is Tokino, like Twister. | ||
| I thought it was Tree Stump. | ||
| Yeah, it's a Tree Stump. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Okay, that's what I said. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Well, fuck, man. | ||
| You're just telling us. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm guessing. | |
| I'm telling you, I'm guessing. | ||
| It's a pretty educated guess. | ||
| I feel better because of it. | ||
| I think Torquino. | ||
| You know what I love when they say in the corner, when they go, Tranquilo, Tranquilo. | ||
| When they're telling you to relax. | ||
| That's a Mexican. | ||
| Tranquilo. | ||
| Well, it's Portuguese, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Tranquilo. | |
| I'm pretty sure. | ||
| This is going to be a good fight. | ||
| In Portuguese, it's at least a similar sounding word, because I've heard guys in Brazilian dudes' corners calling it. | ||
| You see her in her face? | ||
| She's like, I made this up. | ||
| Eddie, is he still with Mackenzie? | ||
| Is he still with Mackenzie? | ||
| Not him. | ||
| He's with Paige, right? | ||
| No, they're both not with anybody. | ||
| They're both single now. | ||
| No, I think Cody's with Paige. | ||
| They're both dick-slingers. | ||
| And Cody, who is a murderous puncher. | ||
| And a dime piece. | ||
| We don't have any idea... | ||
| How do you say it? | ||
| Taquinos? | ||
| Ooh, he's trying to swing for the fences. | ||
| I'm going to say Tank, Tank, Keenho. | ||
| Tank, Keenho. | ||
| That's my guess. | ||
| How many times has he fought MMA, eh? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Five. | |
| He's 5-0. | ||
| 5-0, but all outside the UFC? Yes. | ||
| What a tough first time. | ||
| First time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And Cody's 7-0, but he doesn't have a ton of experience. | ||
| I mean, his stand-up doesn't look that bad, right? | ||
| You know what? | ||
| Cody has a ton of amateur fights. | ||
| He's winging punches from the outside. | ||
| He's going to get countered. | ||
| He's going to be super careful. | ||
| Cody's going to knock this guy out. | ||
| Oh, you never know, man. | ||
| He might just decide, okay, it's time to go on a defensive shell and hit that double. | ||
| Good luck taking Cody down. | ||
| Hard to take down for sure? | ||
| It's good. | ||
| Did he wrestle in high school and shit? | ||
| No, no, that's what I mean. | ||
| I mean the jiu-jitsu guy. | ||
| What kind of wrestling he has. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| All his greatest work has been done with the gi, so I don't know how it's going to translate. | ||
| I'm not sure. | ||
| Where did Cody wrestle? | ||
| Just in high school. | ||
| But he's real good? | ||
| Really, really good. | ||
| And that Team Alpha Male, they said he sets the standard as far as intensity. | ||
| He's a motherfucker. | ||
| His footwork looks great, right? | ||
| Yeah, he's definitely got some nasty power. | ||
| Oh, look at that. | ||
| He's hurt. | ||
| He's hurt. | ||
| And he has a gun in his back pocket. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Is that a gun in your pants? | ||
| Dude, that's an amazing tattoo. | ||
| How do you get through that? | ||
| Through the weigh-in. | ||
| That's the hardest tramp stamp ever. | ||
| Goes right to his butthole. | ||
| Dude. | ||
| And he has wings on his stomach. | ||
| Shot through the heart. | ||
| And you're to blame. | ||
| You give love. | ||
| Dude, so no one knows if he's still with Paige? | ||
| Is that not a thing anymore? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nah, I got it. | |
| I'm just curious! | ||
| Oh, Cody took him down! | ||
| Let's see how much control he had. | ||
| None. | ||
| Didn't like it. | ||
| He's gonna say, stand up. | ||
| Cody should not go to the ground with this. | ||
| Hell no. | ||
| Yeah, I don't think he'd probably like that. | ||
| But meanwhile, no controls. | ||
| Hey, Jibra, what would you have liked to have seen from him in that position? | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| I mean, that's Tonkino. | ||
| He can do whatever he wants. | ||
| Right, but what would you like when you're seeing a guy who's trying to go for that long part time? | ||
| I think he's not going to be able to take him down, and I think he's going to lose the fight if he stays on his feet. | ||
| So if he can't take him down, and you can't... | ||
| Survive on your feet. | ||
| What else is left? | ||
| Jump to guard. | ||
| I mean, that's all you got left. | ||
| Jump to half guard. | ||
| Pull half guard from the cage. | ||
| It's been done successfully many times. | ||
| Many times. | ||
| I wish Frank Mayer would do that. | ||
| It's not some fantasy. | ||
| It works. | ||
| And if you're good on your back. | ||
| If you got sweeps. | ||
| If you got fire off your back. | ||
| He's a world champ. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But I've never really seen him on his back. | ||
| He's the destroyer on top. | ||
| He destroys people going through him on top. | ||
| I bet he's pretty good, though. | ||
| I bet his jiu-jitsu's better on his back than Cody's is on top. | ||
| His stand-up is not that bad. | ||
| He's definitely outgunned by Cody, but he's moving well. | ||
| He's getting out of the way of shit well. | ||
| He's landing some decent leg kicks. | ||
| Especially for 5-0 in the jiu-jitsu background. | ||
| His stand-up's not bad at all. | ||
| It's not that bad. | ||
| See, he's moving, he's trying to use that check hook as he's stepping back. | ||
| He's not running in a straight line with his hands down. | ||
| He's not doing anything dumb. | ||
| He's not being reckless, that's for sure. | ||
| No, he's taking his time. | ||
| He's smart. | ||
| He's very smart. | ||
| Anybody that gets that good at jiu-jitsu, man, when you're hitting that super mastery level where you're beating the best guys in the world, Well, those guys, all they have to do is just focus on the new thing, and they start picking up the new thing with the same sort of clarity that they pick up, as long as they don't have any physical issues. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Especially jiu-jitsu guys, though. | ||
| They're so cerebral. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They're so smart. | ||
| They bring you into the octagon, I feel like. | ||
| There's a difference in the way you move, though, and the problem is that some guys who are grapplers, they never seem to figure out how to develop that explosive snap. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Bro, I'm talking like you were saying the world-class world champions like Jacare, Damian Maia, like those motherfuckers, when they bring that same mindset to MMA, dude, they're fucking nightmares. | ||
| Yeah, Jacare right now. | ||
| Oh, he got hurt? | ||
| Oh, look at that! | ||
| Oh, shit! | ||
| Takino got some stand-up. | ||
| It's scary to have someone with that sort of mastery even. | ||
| You got that good at something. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Cody just dropped it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mario, stop the fight. | |
| Go ahead and hate on that stoppage, Eddie. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| I hate that shit. | ||
| I hate that shit. | ||
| Anyone see brain trauma? | ||
| Safety! | ||
| Safety on three! | ||
| One, two, three! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Safety! | |
| It's a fight! | ||
| He just got fucked up! | ||
| That was over, dude. | ||
| That fight was legit. | ||
| No, they couldn't let it go. | ||
| No, Eddie. | ||
| He got in the way. | ||
| Let's look at it again. | ||
| I was happy with it. | ||
| I felt like Cody scrambled his brain. | ||
| Cody would've won. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| 100% Cody would've won. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You missed it? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I was looking at you. | ||
| We want to see a little... | ||
| Here he is. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| We want to see violence. | ||
| He's out on his feet. | ||
| Look at this, Eddie. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| Bam! | ||
| Oh, right, left, and a right. | ||
| Look, he's out there. | ||
| No, he's fine there. | ||
| Not really. | ||
| Mario Yamasaki in the way. | ||
| That was terrible positioning by Mario Yamasaki. | ||
| Don't tell me that was a good stoppage. | ||
| It was a good stoppage. | ||
| Okay, it's a little suspect. | ||
| Look, he's rough there. | ||
| Look at that! | ||
| He's in his way! | ||
| And then what? | ||
| I don't know what's going on there. | ||
| Now I'm agreeing with Eddie. | ||
| First of all, the positioning by Mario Yamasaki was terrible. | ||
| You're not supposed to do that. | ||
| You're not supposed to step in between unless you're stopping the fight. | ||
| So he stepped in between, then he stepped out. | ||
| Like, he got in between the action, and then he let the action go on. | ||
| I don't think you're ever really supposed to do that. | ||
| That was a moment of indecision, or he wanted to get a better look at him, and that was the only way he could do it. | ||
| But it's a mistake to go between the two fighters, because, at least in my opinion, it makes the fighters think that the fight stops, so a guy backs off, where he could have landed shots in that To really end it? | ||
| If Mario hadn't been in his way. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| I mean, he drops him. | ||
| He's hurt. | ||
| He's on top of him. | ||
| Those couple seconds sometimes is all you need to get enough clarity to grab a leg or to try to scramble back up to your feet or to clench. | ||
| So that second or so where Mario walks in front of him, that interfered. | ||
| Mario really fucked up, right? | ||
| You didn't hear what he just said? | ||
| No, I heard what he said. | ||
| No, Mario fucked up. | ||
| Whether Mario jumped in or not, Cody's winning that fight right there. | ||
| Whether he got more head trauma or not, that fight was over. | ||
| But do you understand that the fans want definitive closure? | ||
| Yes, and I do not give a fuck. | ||
| You don't care about the fans? | ||
| No, not when it comes to that guy's safety. | ||
| His first fight in the UFC, he was out on his feet. | ||
| Okay, it's all about safety. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| Speaking of head trauma... | ||
| I think Eddie's being passive-aggressive. | ||
| No, you know what? | ||
| I get it. | ||
| Mario fucked us. | ||
| Mario's the real loser here. | ||
| He really fucked us. | ||
| Oh, how dare you. | ||
| Well, no, I'm saying if there's a loser in the fight, it's Mario. | ||
| Mario, if you're out there. | ||
| No, Mario, I love you the heart. | ||
| By the way, Brendan, you know I love you. | ||
| I'm not trying to talk shit. | ||
| I know, brother. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is just like... | |
| What? | ||
| Don't ever apologize on a fight campaign. | ||
| Your opinion is super valid. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| We gotta argue. | ||
| I love to argue. | ||
| As long as we're clear with that. | ||
| Eddie's always been of the mind that you should let guys take a few more hits on the ground rather than a few less. | ||
| That's the majority. | ||
| And I'm saying I've been in there. | ||
| It's arguable. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| With the head trauma and I see how it affects friends. | ||
| And I'm just like, man, I wish you'd stop it a little earlier. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because the odds are homeboy's not going to win that fight. | ||
| So might as well stop the fight another day. | ||
| Yeah, but you don't know that. | ||
| Frankie Edgar. | ||
| There have been plenty of fights. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| There have been plenty of fights. | ||
| I love the exceptions, though. | ||
| That's the exception. | ||
| I'm talking about in general. | ||
| There would be more of those exceptions if there would have been more referees letting it go. | ||
| Like, how about Weidman? | ||
| Maybe Weidman's not the same. | ||
| Or Junior Dos Santos. | ||
| Maybe he's not the same. | ||
| Weidman fight without a doubt should have been stopped at the end of the fight. | ||
| You need to start a fund. | ||
| Some kind of fund. | ||
| You don't think the Weidman fight should have been stopped at the end of the third? | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I would be lying if I said I didn't like the violence. | ||
| I like dudes getting fucking smashed. | ||
| That's the majority. | ||
| People enjoy that. | ||
| Because that's what they pay to watch. | ||
| I like that. | ||
| From my point of view as the ex-fighter, it's like, dude, let him fight another day. | ||
| He has a long career, man. | ||
| Let's just stop it. | ||
| You're going to get way more fights out of him. | ||
| That's why it's so glorious when Chuck After he wins, he's like a fucking viking. | ||
| It's like, that's why? | ||
| Because it's so dangerous. | ||
| You could get shut off, but I didn't get shut off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You got shut off. | |
| I know, that's great. | ||
| And then in 20 years, you see these boys and they're drooling and they don't know where the fuck they're at. | ||
| You know what they knew? | ||
| They know the risk. | ||
| Alright? | ||
| I know, but we can prevent some of it, is all I'm saying. | ||
| Start a prevention fund. | ||
| Come on, start a prevention fund. | ||
| I like both of your attitudes about this. | ||
| You know what my attitude right now is? | ||
| I hope that science hits some point where medical science will figure out some way to just revive the brain. | ||
| That'd be so dope. | ||
| I mean, why can't they? | ||
| If they could do all this different stuff to make your muscle tissue repair, and they can fix all kinds of stuff. | ||
| Like, who knows what they could do with, like, maybe one day they're going to be able to shoot stem cells into your brain. | ||
| That's the ticket. | ||
| If you do that, we're all... | ||
| Hell yeah, let's go out on... | ||
| Do you imagine? | ||
| You got a bunch of Leonard Garcias now. | ||
| Fuck this noise. | ||
| Meanwhile, what are the side effects? | ||
| It would be just like... | ||
| Imagine the side effects. | ||
| Fucking nightmares every night. | ||
| I'll take it. | ||
| I'll take it. | ||
| Every night, would you take it? | ||
| Maybe it's awesome. | ||
| Maybe it's going to be like steroids for the brain. | ||
| That'd be so sick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Maybe we're going to get like... | |
| You know how you see bodybuilders? | ||
| They're fucking ridiculously oversized. | ||
| You're going to get people with giant Mars attacks brains. | ||
| Like Peaky and the brains? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mars attacks. | |
| That's a great reference. | ||
| They're just going to run the stock market and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're just going to continue to run the world. | |
| And everybody's going to say, there's fucking juicers out there running the world. | ||
| We're going to get mad that people are brain juicing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The problem is, it's the elite. | |
| That's such a great reference. | ||
| Martin's attacking forever. | ||
| Another classic movie, son. | ||
| We did a great job in science. | ||
| All sorts of science and haters be going like, motherfucker brain juice. | ||
| Yeah, he's juicy. | ||
| He's super smart. | ||
| Yeah, he read your mind, bitch, because he's on steroids. | ||
| Try reading minds without steroids. | ||
| I don't care. | ||
| He read my mind. | ||
| He made me cum. | ||
| He's cheating! | ||
| You know, that's like when you see a giant bodybuilder do, that's the first thing that every guy says. | ||
| Boy, he under-committed to that kick. | ||
| He backed off that kick. | ||
| Yeah, he didn't commit. | ||
| And Cody caught him with a beautiful counter. | ||
| Imagine Jeopardy, where they test for steroids. | ||
| is this on is this on yes well I'm gonna take a piss on that yeah that was that was a big fuck up That's a big fuck-up right there. | ||
| I mean look, I don't want to do that job. | ||
| That's a way harder job than doing commentary. | ||
| My job doing commentary is the easiest one out of all the jobs in the UFC. Slightly harder than Ariane's job. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| It's slightly harder than Arianna's job. | ||
| Until someday you go away and they have to replace you. | ||
| Everyone's like, God, who's the last? | ||
| Who's the last? | ||
| Brian Stan's doing it. | ||
| We're here. | ||
| We're here in Woodland Hills partying it up. | ||
| And more people are listening to you talk about Mars Attacks than Brian Stan break down the fights. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just the way it is. | |
| Motherfucker brain juicing. | ||
| Dude. | ||
| Ain't that reference of the night? | ||
| Nobody can be that smart, okay? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bullshit! | |
| Is he brain juicing? | ||
| Dude, he's talking about physics and shit. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| He's juicing. | ||
| He's gotta be juicing. | ||
| He's got to have his skull removed. | ||
| They put his brain to fish tank. | ||
| He's a fucking juicer. | ||
| He knows about physics. | ||
| He got popped twice. | ||
| He can cook. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He got popped twice on pop quizzes. | |
| He's got like 10 degrees. | ||
| What's the host of Jeopardy? | ||
| What's that guy's name? | ||
| Alex Trebek. | ||
| Alex Trebek. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's going to be like Dana White doing press conferences and shit. | ||
| We got the most stringent tests of all game shows. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| That's going to be dudes way smarter than Einstein. | ||
| If you think about that, man, that's going to happen for sure. | ||
| Brain juice. | ||
| They already have things like Modafinil, which they've outlawed in the Olympics. | ||
| You can't have that in the Olympics anymore. | ||
| And that started out as a smart drug. | ||
| That was a drug that they created. | ||
| They had to say that they made it for people who had narcolepsy. | ||
| It made me angry. | ||
| They originally didn't... | ||
| Modafinil makes you angry? | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I took it for an extended period of time. | ||
| Because you're so smart and you get angry at how dumb people are. | ||
| How stupid everyone is. | ||
| Here's a funny thing out of you like this. | ||
| They came up with it just for performance enhancing reasons. | ||
| It was created for that. | ||
| But then because it's a prescription drug, they had to have a reason to prescribe it, like an illness. | ||
| That's how drugs are set up. | ||
| You can't say, hey, you need a prescription to be more awesome. | ||
| I'm going to take awesome pills. | ||
| No, you have to have something wrong with you. | ||
| I'm not awesome. | ||
| I got diagnosed as unawesome. | ||
| So then once you're diagnosed as unawesome, you can take modafinil. | ||
| So you have to say, like, I'm experiencing fatigue or I drive and I need to stay awake when I drive. | ||
| It has to be something like that. | ||
| I get narcolepsy. | ||
| So they have this drug that's used through Silicon Valley. | ||
| Silicone? | ||
| How do they say it? | ||
| Silicone. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| There's already brain juice? | ||
| Listen, these guys that are running these tech companies, they're all taking modafinil. | ||
| It is the drug of silicone valve. | ||
| Is this the limitless pill you're talking about? | ||
| This is real? | ||
| Where do I get it? | ||
| Yes, modafinil. | ||
| I'll get you a prescription. | ||
| This is real? | ||
| It's New Vigil. | ||
| Have you heard about this, Jamie? | ||
| Pro Vigil or New Vigil? | ||
| Are you on it? | ||
| I have it. | ||
| I have a prescription for it. | ||
| I want it. | ||
| I'll give you some. | ||
| No wonder you're so fucking smart. | ||
| I knew it was bullshit! | ||
| Pretty sure I just witnessed a crime. | ||
| What it does... | ||
| No, I'm going to get it in my prescription. | ||
| What it does is... | ||
| Cheater. | ||
| I very rarely take it. | ||
| This is when I take it. | ||
| I'll take it if I know I'm tired and I've got to drive or if I've got to do something and I really want to be sharp or if I don't feel. | ||
| But I don't take it before podcasts anymore. | ||
| I've taken it before like four or five podcasts ever. | ||
| That would be the time to take it. | ||
| Yeah, no, not necessarily. | ||
| Because sometimes you want a conversation to be as... | ||
| You don't want it to be too ramped up. | ||
| You gotta know when to be casual. | ||
| You wanna be able to be casual effortlessly, as well as be amped up. | ||
| See, I think Modafinil is really good if I want to be amped up, but I don't necessarily think it would be good if I wanted to be casual. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| You take it like Viagra on the first date, you're like, I'm gonna fucking... | ||
| Dazzle this bitch with science. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You start talking about some shit you don't know nothing about. | |
| This shit's just coming to me. | ||
| I don't know what it is. | ||
| You're like breaking down fucking molecules and shit. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It doesn't work anymore because all she has to do is go into her phone. | ||
| I just Googled what you said and it's nonsense. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| It's the closest thing to Limitless. | ||
| What does that sound? | ||
| You googled what? | ||
| You're the one that's talking about it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What are you talking about? | |
| It's the closest thing to Limitless pills, right? | ||
| I thought I kept hearing noises this whole fucking time you guys been talking about it. | ||
| Yeah, I thought I heard some shit too. | ||
| What was going on over there, Jamie? | ||
| Were you fucking with it? | ||
| I was like, wait a second. | ||
| Acid beer. | ||
| Can you imagine if they put acid in beer? | ||
| Oh, Jamie was playing the Mars Attacks thing. | ||
| You should have Tropic Thunder on that bitch, not fucking Mars Attacks. | ||
| Mars Attacks is like top 200 maybe. | ||
| So don't sleep on Mars Attacks. | ||
| Is Mars Attacks good? | ||
| I never saw it. | ||
| Jack Nicholson? | ||
| It's fucking amazing. | ||
| Mars Attacks? | ||
| Hilarious. | ||
| It's hilarious. | ||
| It still holds up. | ||
| I watched it a year ago. | ||
| It's funny. | ||
| Dude, I just watched probably six months ago. | ||
| It's really funny. | ||
| It's Tim Burton. | ||
| Yeah, it's a classic. | ||
| Yeah, it's a classic. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alright, alright. | |
| I'm skeptical. | ||
| No, you know, I don't dare you. | ||
| Dude, when you tell me to watch something, I watch it. | ||
| Game of Thrones. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alright. | |
| I resisted Game of Thrones for years! | ||
| I've never seen it. | ||
| He said, bro, just fucking watch it. | ||
| Do you like it? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| Who doesn't like Game of Thrones? | ||
| I've never seen it. | ||
| If you don't like Game of Thrones, they should arrest you. | ||
| Natasha Leggero doesn't like it. | ||
| Hold up. | ||
| Is there dragons in it? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I'm not going to watch it. | ||
| You don't believe in dragons? | ||
| You don't believe in dragons! | ||
| You don't believe in dragons! | ||
| Eddie, I'm 32 years old. | ||
| He's a father. | ||
| He's a father. | ||
| I'm a grown man. | ||
| I can't even get in a conversation with someone that doesn't believe in dragons. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| Come on! | ||
| Listen here, Santa Claus. | ||
| Time to fucking grow up, Peter Pan. | ||
| Hey, Santa Claus, that's another story. | ||
| There's not enough evidence for Santa Claus. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You don't believe in dragons? | |
| Have you seen Vikings? | ||
| Speaking of... | ||
| It's supposed to be factual. | ||
| No. | ||
| Is that bad? | ||
| No, it's fucking awesome. | ||
| The show? | ||
| Yeah, Vikings is bad. | ||
| It's all about Ragnar, Lothbrok. | ||
| Is it based on reality? | ||
| Yes, it's based on reality and it's Vikings. | ||
| Vikings just fucking ruin everything. | ||
| It's awesome. | ||
| They just... | ||
| They were horrible. | ||
| Were they the first terrorists? | ||
| That's what I heard. | ||
| Fuck yeah, they were. | ||
| Well, they were conquerors. | ||
| There was a bad time when someone... | ||
| It wasn't like... | ||
| You know, but a few hundred years ago, where a ship showed up at your shore, you got a real fucking problem. | ||
| Yeah, they're gonna fuck your girl bad. | ||
| Oh, they're fucking everybody. | ||
| They're killing everybody. | ||
| You better have catapults with fucking balls of fire ready to go. | ||
| Yeah, there's no technology drones. | ||
| You're gonna have to battle that shit with your hands. | ||
| Can you imagine living back then? | ||
| You would get nothing done. | ||
| How about those motherfuckers that were on the front line? | ||
| Because all you're doing is like shaping swords, getting ready for the invasion. | ||
| And fucking. | ||
| Every brave heart beat. | ||
| And killing battle is the same. | ||
| Making arrows. | ||
| Trying not to die. | ||
| Trying to live past 25. Dude, come on. | ||
| When there's a rugby team of a thousand people here, a thousand people there, and they just rush each other, how the fuck do you... | ||
| The only way you can convince a guy to do that is you gotta make sure he believes in Jesus, and you gotta make sure he believes in God, because you're doing it for God. | ||
| I was too sure about that shit. | ||
| But that was Odin back then. | ||
| Whatever. | ||
| Whatever it is. | ||
| If they didn't believe in that shit... | ||
| Bro, that's like the suicide bombers now. | ||
| The only reason they can convince them is because they think they're going to heaven. | ||
| How about that bit you had, man? | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| How about, I don't even know how it goes, but it was something about, what if the guys that got sent over here to blow up America just started partying at the skybox? | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then they get angry phone calls and they go, Allah, why are you still alive? | |
| And I'm like, oh! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you remember that one? | |
| Yeah, that was from Shiny Happy Jihad. | ||
| Why are you still alive? | ||
| Because you're supposed to blow yourself a week. | ||
| You're supposed to blow yourself up a week ago. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| They were on to us. | ||
| We had to hide out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And they're partying at the sky bar with their Mercedes. | |
| Ish, ish, ish, ish, ish. | ||
| Because why are you still alive? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's so stupid. | |
| That's the greatest line ever. | ||
| Why are you still alive? | ||
| They get angry phone calls. | ||
| That's so funny. | ||
| That would be a great animated little series about some dudes that came over to the States that were supposed to blow themselves up, but they just started partying, and they said, fuck that shit. | ||
| They realize it's awesome here. | ||
| You're never going to see a suicide bomber from Beverly Hills. | ||
| They have to come from somewhere that sucks. | ||
| The idea of death. | ||
| It's more appealing than staying alive. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You can't send them to Newport Coast and think they're going to kill people. | |
| The guys that are organizing this shit in the Middle East, they got to make sure they send them to Minnesota or some shit. | ||
| They can't send them on a one-way ticket to LA. It never works. | ||
| They realize that doesn't work. | ||
| They can't fuck with LA. They got to send them to Illinois or some shit like that. | ||
| Minnesota. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Minnesota. | ||
| Wyoming. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Oh, they'll go through with the plans. | ||
| They're like, okay, let's do it. | ||
| After like a week, they go, let's fucking do it. | ||
| Fuck these people. | ||
| We do it for our... | ||
| Yeah, you send them to Miami. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Remember, there's no seven Remember, there's got to be some guy convincing dudes in the Middle East that are looking for the dumbest motherfuckers to hypnotize. | ||
| There's got to be some guy looking to convince them to blow themselves up. | ||
| You've got to throw pussy at them, right? | ||
| Remember, 72 virgins. | ||
| Well, their IQ levels are lower than everyone else's. | ||
| Part of your bit was, how did they get to 72? | ||
| They must have offered 12 at first. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm like, I ain't blowing myself up. | |
| He's going to be like, dude, I'll go through 12 bitches in one night. | ||
| I've talked to God. | ||
| He's final offer, 72. You know what? | ||
| If that was real, if you could prove that shit, if you killed yourself and you got 72 virgins for the eternity, I know dudes personally that would do that shit. | ||
| That's a good deal. | ||
| You just gotta convince them that it's real. | ||
| That's a good deal. | ||
| 72. Rotate one every week. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| You could go forever. | ||
| Yeah, but what if it all burns out when they all die? | ||
| Because if you're talking about eternity, like, you might be eternal, but if they're really 72 virgins, that means they're only, like, 20, and so they've got, like, 80 years of life left if they eat vegetables and take all their vitamins. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no, no, no. | |
| If you're in heaven... | ||
| You're going to die, but you're going to stay alive, and there will be old ladies. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| So you only want to fuck them for the first 40 years. | ||
| That's not like that. | ||
| Once they get into 50 and 60, it's like charity work. | ||
| Then you're jacking out for the rest of the time. | ||
| Then it's the Twilight Zone. | ||
| They're begging you not to break their hips. | ||
| Please don't. | ||
| Zombies, fuck me. | ||
| The dealership and the guy breaks out the calculator. | ||
| He's like, well, you know, if I can give you this many, bro, I think... | ||
| The negotiations. | ||
| Imagine the negotiations for 72. They decided on 72. They knew 50 wouldn't be enough. | ||
| You're not going to get anybody for 50. And you could do it like the lottery where you take like a little bit every month. | ||
| So listen, my friend, you want to keep this rolling? | ||
| You don't want all the bitches at once. | ||
| And then they will die and grow old. | ||
| This is what you want. | ||
| You want one virgin. | ||
| You killed 100 people. | ||
| You killed 100 people in the bombing. | ||
| 72 virgins, one for every 40, 50 years. | ||
| And you're good. | ||
| Can you imagine the guys that are on the fence? | ||
| They're on the fence, and then they decide no, and then something bad. | ||
| The car breaks down, and the fucking transmission falls out, and they're like, or they... | ||
| They're saying a lot of them are... | ||
| They're saying a lot of them, they're convincing their girls to do them. | ||
| They're forcing girls to do it now. | ||
| They talked them into it. | ||
| That was part of my bit. | ||
| How are you going to fuck? | ||
| What was that? | ||
| That was part of my bit. | ||
| I was like, you're never going to see female suicide bombers. | ||
| Now you are. | ||
| Because dick is just not worth that much. | ||
| It's worth like that flyer. | ||
| Dick is way too accessible. | ||
| A lot of them are slaves and they turn them into the suicide bombers. | ||
| Take me a downer. | ||
| You said on your bit, dick is worth like that flyer you find after you leave a club and there's a flyer. | ||
| Dick is worth... | ||
| That much. | ||
| Dude, you had some fucking great suicide bomber shit. | ||
| That was when I was obsessed. | ||
| I was obsessed with suicide bombers. | ||
| That was right after 9-11. | ||
| Yeah, from 9-11 to... | ||
| That was like 2001 to 2005 material. | ||
| That's when I put that on Shiny Happy Jihad. | ||
| Oh man, that could have easily been like some fucking animated series about these guys that got talked into blowing themselves up. | ||
| I forgot about a lot of my bits, man. | ||
| 72 Virgins. | ||
| That's all you gotta discuss. | ||
| 72 Virgins. | ||
| I forgot about the Sky Bar. | ||
| We had talked about doing that. | ||
| We had talked about making a bit out of that. | ||
| Like a thing out of that. | ||
| But you decide, you're like, you know what? | ||
| I don't need no crazy motherfuckers coming after me. | ||
| That was disgust. | ||
| While we were on the man show, that was actually disgust. | ||
| 17 Kennedy's number. | ||
| I think it's time now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
15 years later. | |
| Move him into the house? | ||
| Juan Connero, very good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Very good jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Very strong. | ||
| Do you remember when Brunson took down fucking your boy? | ||
| Yeah, he did. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Multiple times. | |
| And he head-kicked him, too. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| Romero, yeah. | ||
| He hit Yoel Romero with that switch kick off the left leg. | ||
| Kept taking him down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's a stud. | |
| He's a stud. | ||
| Derek Brunson is a stud. | ||
| He just needs like a breakout fight. | ||
| Yep, he's getting better every time. | ||
| But he's like knocking on the door of potential, you know? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Greg Jackson in his Kona... | ||
| I'd love to figure out how Greg's going to do the... | ||
| Has anybody been watching Paul Daly in Bellator? | ||
| How's he been looking? | ||
| He just knocked out a dude. | ||
| He mocks out everybody. | ||
| Just with that left hook. | ||
| He just finished a cat. | ||
| His left hand is retarded strong. | ||
| He was fun to watch, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, man. | |
| I was so bummed out when he got kicked out. | ||
| The whole thing was... | ||
| So unnecessary, man. | ||
| I don't know what horrible, nasty shit Koscheck was saying to him. | ||
| Josh is a dick. | ||
| He probably deserved it, but you shouldn't do that stuff, man. | ||
| I mean, what was he saying? | ||
| You definitely should never, ever, ever do that. | ||
| But man, and he didn't land the punch. | ||
| He should have apologized. | ||
| You know, it's like if cooler heads prevailed, if I was his friend, man, I would have pulled him aside and I would have said, Liz, make a public apology. | ||
| You lost your fucking Yeah, PR like a motherfucker. | ||
| Kudos to Josh Koscheck because he got inside my head so hard. | ||
| I got completely out of character. | ||
| I'm embarrassed. | ||
| I'm ashamed. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's not me. | |
| It'll never happen again. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| I'm so sorry. | ||
| I disrespect the sport. | ||
| I fully expect you to be fined and suspended for a period of time, but I will make reparations and I'm very disappointed in myself. | ||
| Go talk to kids, do whatever you have to. | ||
| And then they would have all been under the water right now and he would have had some insane fights with Condit, insane fights with Lawler, insane fights with so many guys. | ||
| We were robbed of some insane fights from Paul Daly. | ||
| He is one of the best 170-pound strikers on planet Earth in MMA. I'm so excited. | ||
| In MMA, his fucking left hook is over. | ||
| His left hand. | ||
| His left hook is a piston. | ||
| He's one of the best in MMA. I love when he fights still. | ||
| How about when he fights Scott Smith? | ||
| So exciting. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Jesus Christ! | ||
| Remember when he fought Dwayne? | ||
| Yes! | ||
| Our brother Dwayne? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude! | |
| Dude! | ||
| He's terrifying! | ||
| Mark Campman! | ||
| Look at Roan throwing down now! | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| He's stuck with it! | ||
| Well, he's American Top Team. | ||
| He's their head jiu-jitsu coach. | ||
| A lot of those guys retired, you know what I mean? | ||
| He's stuck with it. | ||
| A lot of experience. | ||
| It takes so long to get good at striking. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| He gets you down, you're gonna be in trouble. | ||
| Yeah, but you've got to get Derrick Brunson down. | ||
| Derrick Brunson, look at that takedown defense. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Derrick's got a nasty left kick, too. | ||
| He throws it from southpaw, or he can throw it real good off the switch. | ||
| I'm pretty sure he hit Romero with it off the switch, but he didn't do it from anywhere. | ||
| Oh, big shot from Brunson. | ||
| Oh, what's going to happen here? | ||
| I felt like he wanted to go down there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| I felt like he might have, but he's got a good roll. | ||
| Oh, he's getting teed off. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| What do you have to do to be defensive here? | ||
| You've got to push him away. | ||
| It's hard to do anything against that. | ||
| How do you get the referee to not stop it? | ||
| You've got to see that he's limp. | ||
| He's not limp. | ||
| They tell you that. | ||
| How about Cowboy and Dos Anjos? | ||
| He never went limp there either. | ||
| He's fine. | ||
| He didn't move. | ||
| That was a bad call. | ||
| He didn't move, Joe. | ||
| But he couldn't move. | ||
| He could have moved. | ||
| He could have rolled to guard. | ||
| Oh, it's over now. | ||
| Good point. | ||
| Alright, that's it. | ||
| It's over now. | ||
| I wonder how many punches he just threw. | ||
| It's hard to do anything against that fence. | ||
| No matter what guard you're playing against the fence, it's fucking... | ||
| You gotta get off the fence. | ||
| You gotta get off the fence. | ||
| No guard works against the fence. | ||
| You have to work. | ||
| If you're not working, you're gonna stop it. | ||
| Derrick Brunson... | ||
| Brunson's a mother... | ||
| He needs a breakout fight. | ||
| That ain't it. | ||
| He needs a big-name breakout fight. | ||
| Well, that was a step towards a breakout fight for sure. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Somebody top ten. | ||
| That's the best Ron Carnaro, you know, at this point. | ||
| His striking never looked better. | ||
| I mean, his footwork. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Derrick Brunson's legit. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| He's for real. | ||
| He's a bitch to beat. | ||
| And he's getting better and better all the time. | ||
| What if he fell on his head? | ||
| And broke his neck and died. | ||
| And then that was it. | ||
| Then they gave Ron the win. | ||
| They gave Ron the win. | ||
| I just had all these flashes. | ||
| It's an asterisk. | ||
| Did you ever see Paul Williams fight in boxing? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Great fighter. | ||
| You know, lost that crazy knockout to Sergio Martinez. | ||
| He got hit with that left hand from hell. | ||
| Right here, you've got to put feet on the hips and push them away. | ||
| People forget Paul Williams before that fight was like the shit. | ||
| He did that a little bit. | ||
| Yeah, Paul Williams was awesome, but what I was going to say is a motorcycle accident. | ||
| He got hit by a car. | ||
| Some guy going through an intersection or something like that nailed him. | ||
| I mean, that's some serious... | ||
| He's paralyzed, right? | ||
| Yeah, paralyzed from the waist down. | ||
| He went flying through the air, apparently. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Powerful Derek Brunsford. | ||
| Dun, dun, dun, dun. | ||
| Oh, we got Cowboy next. | ||
| Very impressive. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| If you think about Bellator now, think about that. | ||
| You got Benson over there. | ||
| He's fighting 170. And Benson's got a good fight against that Russian cat. | ||
| Dude. | ||
| Who's that Russian caddy's fighting? | ||
| I can't even entertain this Bellator talk after what I saw the other day. | ||
| What's happening with Yoel? | ||
| Yeah, but it's just the vast two fights, man. | ||
| Oh, Yoel Romero's fucked. | ||
| What's going on with that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| They're appealing. | ||
| Can't be doing steroids. | ||
| Can't you still say he has the best body in MMA? 100%. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| You can still say it? | ||
| No, my boy Woodley does now. | ||
| No. | ||
| Yoel Romero. | ||
| Woodley has a fantastic body. | ||
| Woodley's never failed a steroid test. | ||
| There's no doubt about it, but it doesn't matter. | ||
| Yes, it does. | ||
| We're just talking about result. | ||
| We're not talking about, like, the what got you for the care. | ||
| No, it doesn't matter. | ||
| It may matter. | ||
| My boy Alan Joban has, you know, he has something to say. | ||
| Listen, listen. | ||
| Alan Joban isn't a very, he's got a very good body, but it cannot fuck with the freak show. | ||
| That's what Yoel Romero is. | ||
| Well, the freak show's on some freak shit. | ||
| Allegedly. | ||
| Now think if Alan Joban had his shit. | ||
| He's under investigation. | ||
| Think if Alan Joban took his shit. | ||
| But we're not saying that. | ||
| We're not talking about faces, okay? | ||
| We're not talking about faces. | ||
| You're talking pound for pound bodies right now? | ||
| No, we're not talking about how they got there. | ||
| We're talking about what results were achieved. | ||
| I'm gonna have to go with Uber Eam then, when he fought Brock Lesnar. | ||
| Yes, that's the best. | ||
| Now where does Sage come into this? | ||
| If you're talking about Yo-Yo Romero. | ||
| He's 19, get on my face. | ||
| He's 19 and white. | ||
| Get on my face. | ||
| What is he even eating? | ||
| Get on my face, son. | ||
| Fucking white people. | ||
| He's 19 and white, get on my face. | ||
| You don't like white people? | ||
| I mean, we're tired of white people. | ||
| He's talking about best bodies, though. | ||
| He's tired of them. | ||
| Tired of white people. | ||
| Tired of them. | ||
| Breathing all our ear. | ||
| Wide nose having. | ||
| Yeah, but as far as the guys that I've seen step into the octagon where I was like, what in the fuck? | ||
| Yoel Romero's the number one what in the fuck body of all time. | ||
| That's a skinny Woodley, too. | ||
| Look at Woodley now, though. | ||
| Dude, Woodley has something to say. | ||
| Woodley has that apple bottom out the back, too. | ||
| I gotta see their ass. | ||
| I can't really comment until I see their ass. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Here's where Yoel Romero disappears from the pack. | ||
| Traps. | ||
| His traps are literally from another planet. | ||
| They start at the top of his head. | ||
| They go all the way down the back of his neck. | ||
| They're the biggest fucking traps. | ||
| Like, when you see him, he just looks like he could throw you to the moon. | ||
| Alright, let's say just... | ||
| As far as best body... | ||
| Dude, as far as best body, let's say you have a product, you want to hire a model. | ||
| I'm not hiring him. | ||
| We're talking about fucking him. | ||
| I'm talking about hiring models, too. | ||
| We're talking about fucking? | ||
| Yeah, we're not talking about hiring him. | ||
| I'm still picking Woodley or Joban, because they're fazed. | ||
| Look at that picture. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Alright, he's fucking jacked. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Look at the trap to shoulder ratio off the charts. | ||
| Dude, show Overeem when he fought Lesnar. | ||
| Wait, he's on drugs? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| No, peptides. | ||
| It's up for... | ||
| He was a freak, man. | ||
| Dude, Overeem when he fought Lesnar was a better body. | ||
| Well, Overeem when he fought Lesnar was also a hundred pounds heavier when he weighs in. | ||
| He made me want to retire then. | ||
| Just remember what I just said. | ||
| He's a hundred pounds heavier when he weighed in. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're taking pictures. | |
| Look at Joe. | ||
| Joe's taking video. | ||
| I have my phone out. | ||
| I have my phone out taking pictures of his ass. | ||
| Wait, he's a hundred pounds heavier than what? | ||
| He's a hundred pounds heavier than Yoel Romero when Yoel weighs in. | ||
| I thought you were saying he gained a hundred pounds heavier. | ||
| I mean, it's only really 80, but think about the difference between a 185 and a 265. 265 with world-class striking. | ||
| I mean, it's only 80 pounds. | ||
| I'm exaggerating by saying 100, but not by much. | ||
| You wouldn't really be able to tell the difference if he was 20 pounds heavier than that. | ||
| Oh, come on, son. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Best body in the MMA. Look at that. | ||
| When he fought Brock, I bet, oh my god. | ||
| Yeah, I bet that's as big as a man can get. | ||
| And still be functional, yeah. | ||
| He was amazing. | ||
| I don't think you guys are giving white guys love enough. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Amazing. | |
| I think you guys are... | ||
| He's a freak. | ||
| There we go, yeah! | ||
| I'm just saying that beautiful mocha skin, man. | ||
| That's sex right there. | ||
| Big country. | ||
| Big country. | ||
| Last fight with Rochelt. | ||
| That guy has a lot of fucking Twitter followers. | ||
| A lot of Facebook love. | ||
| Yeah, he does, man. | ||
| People love him some more. | ||
| It just seems like it's not capitalized on enough. | ||
| Dude, you know what's crazy? | ||
| I agree. | ||
| America loves him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, it seems like someone, somehow, should have taken advantage. | ||
| Some company should have scooped him up for commercials or something like that. | ||
| A reality show. | ||
| Well, just a commercial. | ||
| Like, getting him a gig. | ||
| Burger King or something. | ||
| He was close signed with Burger King, I think. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was he? | |
| Dude, I haven't talked to Roy in a while, right? | ||
| We did the Ultimate Fighter together. | ||
| We did our live fire and the kid in Vegas out there. | ||
| I get a text like 10 minutes before the show goes, Love you, brother. | ||
| You can do great tonight. | ||
| Can't wait to see it. | ||
| I'm like, who the fuck is this? | ||
| I go, who is this? | ||
| It's Roy, man. | ||
| I'm in the crowd. | ||
| I was like, dude, he's that dude. | ||
| He's such a nice guy. | ||
| His wife is very cool, too. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, he's one of those guys that I feel like if he had someone who understood how to market him better to sponsors and stuff, I could see that dude doing a ton of commercials. | ||
| He had his wife doing his management. | ||
| Well, you need someone who knows how to sell you to a motor oil company. | ||
| You're talking about CAA. Yeah, remember when Chuck was doing those, what were they? | ||
| Some car. | ||
| Duralast. | ||
| Duralast. | ||
| What is the Duralast? | ||
| Battery. | ||
| Battery. | ||
| Remember the battering wrecking ball hits him in the face and all that kind of shit? | ||
| Chuck was also world champ, though. | ||
| Yeah, true. | ||
| I feel like Roy could be in some humor. | ||
| He could have the Larry the Camper guy shtick. | ||
| Bass fishing type stuff. | ||
| You know, bass fishing equipment, like the boats and shit and the swamps. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| What? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| He would be perfect. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| There's trillions in that. | ||
| If you want to sell money to people in the bass fishing world, you have to have a bass fishing star. | ||
| They have stars. | ||
| You don't think those guys watch the UFC? Oh, they definitely do. | ||
| But you know who they watch even more? | ||
| The Bill Dance fishing show. | ||
| For real. | ||
| There's a whole world where those people live in. | ||
| I watched it the other day for two hours. | ||
| I watched professional bass fishing on TV. You didn't have nothing to do or what? | ||
| I had plenty to do. | ||
| I'm watching psychology. | ||
| No wonder. | ||
| Have you watched Making a Murderer yet? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Oh, fine. | ||
| You watched it all? | ||
| No, I started it. | ||
| How many have you seen? | ||
| Just the first one. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| And I was like, whoa. | ||
| At first, I was like, fuck this guy. | ||
| He's guilty. | ||
| He's guilty. | ||
| The guy's a dirtbag. | ||
| He's guilty. | ||
| His family doesn't want to admit it. | ||
| I see what's going on here. | ||
| And then you find out about the other guy, and you go, oh. | ||
| And then you find out about how they knew about the other guy, and they ignored the evidence. | ||
| I don't want to spoil it. | ||
| Dude, it gets 10 times crazier. | ||
| No, it's pretty fun. | ||
| It lasted two episodes too long for me. | ||
| Is there nine? | ||
| Okay, spoiler alert. | ||
| That's not a spoiler alert! | ||
| Don't listen to him. | ||
| You mean that I stopped watching at the right part? | ||
| Because I don't remember. | ||
| You're fine. | ||
| Nothing else happens. | ||
| What were we talking about right before that? | ||
| How about Narcos? | ||
| Branding Big Country as a superstar. | ||
| Bass fishing. | ||
| Oh yeah, bass fishing people that I watched it for two hours. | ||
| Yeah, I was asking what we had to do. | ||
| And then we said psychology. | ||
| They catch the fish, they weigh them, and they have like a recording, like a digital thing that they weigh them on so they know exactly how much they weigh, and then they throw them back in the water. | ||
| They used to keep them. | ||
| I don't know if they still keep them. | ||
| Maybe it was just what tournaments that I was watching. | ||
| They used to keep them in what they call a live well. | ||
| So this tank, this aerated tank in the pool, in the hull of the boat. | ||
| They throw the fish in there, and then they'd show them to everybody, and then allegedly let them go. | ||
| But that fucking fish has been tortured for hours now. | ||
| So now they throw them back immediately. | ||
| And they just keep catching the same fucking fish? | ||
| Yeah, there's a big problem with fish that have mouth problems and fucking fucked up Yeah, they get hooks, and then they get massive injuries. | ||
| But because we don't think they're screwed, it's all good. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Nobody gives a fuck. | ||
| Can you imagine if you were catching squirrels with hooks? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I was gonna say, no one gives a fuck about bass with hooks in their mouths. | |
| Save bass mouths. | ||
| Imagine if it was like a puppy fishing contest. | ||
| Where you threw bones attached to hooks, and you were pulling them up the hill, and the puppies come and run over, and the puppies grab the hooks, and you're trying to get the biggest puppy. | ||
| That makes me sad. | ||
| Smash it with a stick. | ||
| But a bass, a small bass. | ||
| If you watch those guys catch a small bass, that's like a year-old bass, a two-year-old bass. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If Disney made a movie about a bass, a cute bass. | |
| They don't know who gets a There's no people standing for fish rights and shit. | ||
| Fish is like, okay, you can eat that shit. | ||
| I only like dolphins. | ||
| Tuna. | ||
| There was an organization called the Lobster Liberation Organization. | ||
| I'm not bullshitting. | ||
| They'd break into restaurants and seafood places, and they would free the lobsters and send them loose back into the ocean again. | ||
| That's awesome. | ||
| I have cockroaches in my garage if you want to get those, too. | ||
| That's awesome. | ||
| Take them back to Madagascar or wherever the fuck they came from. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| Isn't that hilarious? | ||
| Breed them in your house. | ||
| That's fine. | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| I'd be down for something like that. | ||
| But you're getting arrested for a lobster. | ||
| There's people that save goldfish. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But then you get out right away. | ||
| No, I don't know. | ||
| Well, they have. | ||
| That's a problem. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| But it's a problem when people take those fish, like goldfish, and they release them in a lake. | ||
| Well, all kinds of fish. | ||
| Goldfish alone. | ||
| You release them in a lake and they're an invasive species. | ||
| They fuck with the whole ecosystem. | ||
| Asian carp, a lot of that. | ||
| There's a lot of different fish that somehow or another through either people releasing them, like they had them, they're like snakeheads, like people who've let snakehead fish. | ||
| They'll kill every fish in a fucking lake to save it from snakeheads. | ||
| And it'll come after you. | ||
| Nothing wrong with that. | ||
| A snakehead will bite you. | ||
| It'll climb on land and bite you. | ||
| I don't know what a snakehead is. | ||
| They walk across the land to find a new... | ||
| You got a picture of a snakehead for me? | ||
| What? | ||
| A snakehead. | ||
| A snakehead fish is from Africa. | ||
| And people used to keep them as pets because they're cool. | ||
| What are we talking about? | ||
| And what they would do is, these fucking fish, they would get sick of them. | ||
| Are they cute? | ||
| No. | ||
| Pull up a snakehead, Jamie. | ||
| They're monsters. | ||
| They're dinosaurs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, sick. | |
| And they walk on land. | ||
| Well, you don't understand. | ||
| They get fucking big, too. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Oh, no, no. | ||
| Wait, wait. | ||
| I'm going to freak you out. | ||
| That's a barracuda, son. | ||
| Jamie, pull-up snakehead in the Congo walks on land in the video. | ||
| Hold up. | ||
| Those things walk on, like, in their house? | ||
| They walk from one pond to another pond across the ground. | ||
| Those things are awesome. | ||
| Like, they come out of the water and they walk. | ||
| They're not very popular, though, huh? | ||
| They're monsters. | ||
| This is a snakehead in Thailand. | ||
| Okay, here it is in Thailand. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Peace! | |
| Oh, this is scary. | ||
| I don't know if this is... | ||
| The guy has a bandana on. | ||
| No, this is not it, Jamie. | ||
| We want to see the one in the Congo. | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| This is one he caught. | ||
| I don't think it's going to show it walking. | ||
| Maybe snakehead fish walking. | ||
| Are they dangerous at all? | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| Oh, they're not dangerous? | ||
| Oh, if it's not dangerous, I'll get it. | ||
| I mean, they'll probably bite you. | ||
| Nah, I need something to attack people. | ||
| But the really big ones, you have to worry about sharks. | ||
| Also in the Congo, remember those spiders that attack in swarms? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's different. | ||
| They're usually solitary in the States, but in the Congo, they fucking swarm you. | ||
| Spiders, giant spiders. | ||
| People, humans swarm. | ||
| They make these giant animals. | ||
| Not people. | ||
| There's no people in the Yeah, they catch, like, squirrels and shit. | ||
| Spiders do. | ||
| I've seen the ones that are big enough to catch birds, but I don't know. | ||
| I love a cute squirrel, though, man. | ||
| What's worse than fucking spiders swarming on you? | ||
| Yeah, Jamie, just look for it in the Congo, because this is not it. | ||
| It's a BBC documentary in the Congo. | ||
| Maybe it's not exactly listed as snakehead. | ||
| Maybe I'm saying the wrong name. | ||
| But I know snakehead is a similar fish. | ||
| It's an invasive species from other countries that just takes over. | ||
| Sounds dope. | ||
| Dude, how about they're trying to one-up each other cowboying right now? | ||
| They're just walking on the land. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look at this thing walking on the land. | ||
| They're walking until they find another lake. | ||
| Well, unless they're eating people... | ||
| But these are little ones? | ||
| They'll bite the fuck out of you. | ||
| I know that. | ||
| Not step on that fucking thing. | ||
| Well, what's crazy in the Congo... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Here's the way you find it. | |
| Shoebill bird eats snakehead fish in the Congo. | ||
| Shoehill bird eats prehistoric fish. | ||
| It's the craziest shit because it's a shoehill? | ||
| Shoebill? | ||
| Shoebill's five feet tall and has a beak that's about the size of my torso. | ||
| This gigantic hatchet growing out of its face. | ||
| Pterodactyl. | ||
| And it looks evil as fuck. | ||
| That's a shoebill. | ||
| Look at that thing. | ||
| It's smaller than the ones with the pterobird and shit? | ||
| Yeah, smaller than the pterobirds by a couple of feet, but they're still five feet fucking tall. | ||
| You don't get a sense of perspective in this photo. | ||
| It looks like a duck on steroids. | ||
| Yeah, but if you were standing next to it, you would get a sense of perspective. | ||
| You would be terrified by that thing. | ||
| Because imagine standing next to that thing, and you're only a foot taller than it. | ||
| You'd be shit in your pants. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| That thing's monstrous. | ||
| Is that the thing we saw in that Congo? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| That's the same documentary. | ||
| It's like ostriches are fucking huge, right? | ||
| Oh yeah, but they don't have the creepy eyes that these things have. | ||
| They have small faces, so they don't look dangerous. | ||
| Ostriches, they'll fuck you up, though. | ||
| Yeah, don't they kick you or some shit? | ||
| Yeah, they kick the shit out of you. | ||
| Look at that shit out of you. | ||
| God, dog, that thing is... | ||
| That's a fat-ass duck. | ||
| That'll eat babies. | ||
| That's every one of my nightmares right there. | ||
| A giant bird. | ||
| This thing walks through the swamp, and then it's going to jack a shoebill. | ||
| I mean, a snakehead. | ||
| Jack us? | ||
| That bird's my size. | ||
| Yeah, it's a big ass bird. | ||
| It's the size of me almost. | ||
| I think they only weigh like 50 or 60 pounds. | ||
| Yeah, I can get down with that bird. | ||
| You wish. | ||
| But it's a five foot bird, man. | ||
| I'd fucking run. | ||
| Is it really five foot? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, the big ones, they can get five foot. | ||
| See if you can find another better. | ||
| See if you find a shoebill bird in the Congo. | ||
| Look at that thing. | ||
| Yeah, look, it's eating that fish whole. | ||
| It's a little dinosaur. | ||
| Powerful main event. | ||
| Cowboy versus cowboy. | ||
| Cowboy, cowboy. | ||
| About to go down. | ||
| Cowboy on cowboy crime. | ||
| This cowboy looks really calm. | ||
| They say he's super relaxed because of the shit he went through in Brazil, so finding him is just fun. | ||
| He doesn't get the same nerves. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| Isn't that interesting? | ||
| What did he go through in Brazil? | ||
| I'm not sure. | ||
| He grew up really poor on a farm. | ||
| Really poor on a farm. | ||
| Yeah, he looks super relaxed. | ||
| The whole montage before this was just them trying to out-cowboy each other. | ||
| Like, who's more a cowboy? | ||
| Do you see it? | ||
| This dude looks super. | ||
| Yeah, showed cowboy on a ranch, showed him on a Brazilian ranch. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| Well, it's a good move for marketing. | ||
| The two best cowboys in the world are American and Brazilian. | ||
| Two cowboys. | ||
| There's a lot of cowboys in Brazil. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I didn't realize that. | |
| I just, I would like to see him, I want to see a good fighter get a real camp. | ||
| You know, I don't like anybody fighting on two weeks notice. | ||
| He's dangerous for Cerrone, though. | ||
| Yeah, he's dangerous. | ||
| Super dangerous. | ||
| He's dangerous, period. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Hugging people. | ||
| A guy that's going to come forward on Cerrone. | ||
| This motherfucker's taking selfies before he fights. | ||
| Look how happy he is, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I'll tell you he's got to do some shit. | ||
| When this is your pleasure? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| This is going to be fun. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| I can't wait for this. | ||
| Relaxed, dancing. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| He must think this is his time. | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| He looks so relaxed. | ||
| There's no pressure on him. | ||
| Look how relaxed he is. | ||
| Pump those hips. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| What is the ass? | ||
| Bomba? | ||
| No. | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| Ceuta bunda. | ||
| Bunda? | ||
| That's it? | ||
| Eddie, what's the word for butt in Portuguese? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bunda. | |
| You've seen that, right? | ||
| You've seen chicks do that, right? | ||
| A guy will sit down and grab their legs around them and fucking... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No one's seen that. | ||
| I'm not doing that, though. | ||
| It's like a Jeff Glover donkey guard. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She jumps back at a Jeff Glover guard and just works that ass. | |
| There it is. | ||
| That'll break your nose, son. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| He's just... | ||
| Nose to asshole. | ||
| And she's jamming, jamming his nose in her asshole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What UFC fight was it when you called Donkey Guard? | |
| It was like years ago. | ||
| It was like eight years ago. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, this position is what we call Donkey Guard. | |
| Look at this. | ||
| This girl is hurting his face with her ass. | ||
| That's not sexy. | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| But when she was ramming that nose into that asshole, that ain't for me. | ||
| How do you think this relationship ends? | ||
| Do you think she feels connected to him after this ride? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| He 100% got his dick sucked out. | ||
| Do you think he's got a chance to fuck her because of this? | ||
| Where is this? | ||
| In Mexico? | ||
| Somewhere where it's hot. | ||
| It's Brazil. | ||
| Somewhere where it's hot. | ||
| So far I don't see anything. | ||
| It's really warm out. | ||
| They have no AC. Is there something wrong with this? | ||
| Zero AC. Oh, they're singing too. | ||
| This is a whole performance. | ||
| I guarantee you the song is probably not your favorite. | ||
| That old man's about to blow his fucking neck out. | ||
| They're going to fucking bust. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| See how she spins? | ||
| And boom. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Shit! | ||
| I have a problem with that. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| It's not for me, bro. | ||
| I would stop the dance. | ||
| Is he wearing some religious outfit? | ||
| No way! | ||
| Look at that! | ||
| Like he's a cleric. | ||
| I thought they were in Brazil and now it looks more like Africa. | ||
| This is like Pakistan or something. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Might be Dubai. | ||
| You think this would happen with that? | ||
| He's happy. | ||
| Definitely not happen in fucking Africa. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| He screams. | ||
| And what's up with the guys that like getting kneed in the balls by chicks? | ||
| They pay for that. | ||
| Have you ever watched that shit? | ||
| Someone sent me a funny... | ||
| Graphic of that the other day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's horrible. | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| I just got sent in a group message about... | ||
| They want their balls smashed. | ||
| It's point of view, so it's a guy sitting there, and he's videotaping his legs open, and he has two midgets in little outfits run up and start kicking him and stomping on the sticking balls. | ||
| How did he not die? | ||
| Hey, Eddie, that thing you sent me today, the ultimate sack fighting thing... | ||
| That's so crazy. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| They did exactly what we came up with. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They did it twice. | |
| Twice. | ||
| College Humor did two of our sketches for Man Show. | ||
| There must be a writer that worked for the Man Show. | ||
| There has to be, because they did extreme sack fighting. | ||
| Or maybe they heard us talking about it. | ||
| And the Jesus cross trainer. | ||
| They did that one, too. | ||
| They did that, too? | ||
| They did that one, too. | ||
| Okay, but it is possible that someone came up with it on their own. | ||
| It is totally possible. | ||
| Did you guys talk about it on here? | ||
| We've talked about it. | ||
| I've talked about it on my podcast. | ||
| Have you talked about it on my podcast? | ||
| How long ago? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Extreme... | |
| We talked about, I think, on mine, too, way back in the day, I think. | ||
| We were talking about different sketches that we did that were ridiculous. | ||
| We had to have Bobby Lee and Joey Diaz, and Joey Diaz kept losing because his balls were too big. | ||
| So he became a trainer. | ||
| Bobby Lee won. | ||
| We were going to give him some fake balls that were that big. | ||
| Yeah, Bobby Lee was the master, and everybody would go to visit him. | ||
| He was like, he's on an island somewhere, and he'd teach you how to sack fight correctly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's funny. | |
| He just couldn't touch his nuts. | ||
| They were so small. | ||
| The future of MMA. Eventually, state by state, they're going to legalize ball hitting. | ||
| When the balls are in play, the game changes. | ||
| We had a whole fucking sketch movie. | ||
| They totally ripped us off. | ||
| And then someone made it. | ||
| I don't know if they ripped us off. | ||
| I am giving them the benefit of the doubt. | ||
| That's what I do from now on. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| We know when people are bullshit artists and rip-off artists. | ||
| It always comes to surface. | ||
| That thing, the internet, it's kind of a... | ||
| It's going to get you. | ||
| But, you know, these guys, it could have easily been that they came up with it on their own, or it could have been like, these guys had great ideas, they didn't even do it, so fuck them. | ||
| And there may have been a podcast where I went through all our sketches that got... | ||
| I talked about him and I think once or twice I may have said you know what if someone out there wants to run with it run with it Well you would never get away with it anyway That was never even a thought I'm just saying that that was our shit yeah because if you 12 years If you come up with an idea but you don't do anything about it, you talk about the idea and then someone else does something with it, that's so much different than you having already done the sketch and then someone ripping off the sketch. | ||
| True. | ||
| Completely. | ||
| Meanwhile, this shit's about to go down. | ||
| I'm excited for this fight. | ||
| Cowboys. | ||
| I'm excited to see, how do you think Donald's going to fight at 170? | ||
| Good, man. | ||
| No weight cut. | ||
| I think his gas is going to be better. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He's a motherfucker. | ||
| It's just, how does Donald feel after that loss, is the X Factor, after getting dismantled by Dos Anjos? | ||
| That's a good point. | ||
| How's he going to respond? | ||
| And he's fighting a bigger person. | ||
| When is someone usually taller than him at 55s? | ||
| Never at 55s. | ||
| This guy's taller, has a longer reach. | ||
| And loves to stand. | ||
| He looks good, though. | ||
| Good hands. | ||
| Yes, he looks way better. | ||
| Yeah, he looks thick. | ||
| Yeah, Donald's a huge 55er, man. | ||
| Well, I think he's had issues in the past, too. | ||
| This is the first time he's got crazy shredded. | ||
| He looks good to me, man. | ||
| He looks really good to me. | ||
| I mean, it's not crazy shredded. | ||
| It's healthy shredded. | ||
| Yeah, it's different. | ||
| It's like there's a level of shredded where you go, man, this guy might be a little bit too lean. | ||
| Alan Javon good or not? | ||
| We're talking different league. | ||
| How would you rate him? | ||
| No, Alan Javon's another league. | ||
| Another level. | ||
| And Alan? | ||
| He has a Versace deal for fuck's sake. | ||
| Okay, so we got Dada 5000 on one hand. | ||
| No, Aki Bono. | ||
| Aki Bono on one hand. | ||
| And then Prime Cowboy. | ||
| Like, who's the leanest guy ever that fought in MMA? The leanest guy ever. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| The most shredded? | ||
|
unidentified
|
The leanest? | |
| The most shredded ever? | ||
| Yeah, most shredded. | ||
| Gleason Tebow? | ||
| Yeah, probably. | ||
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's close. | |
| Come on, he'd walk around at 195 and fight at 55. Anthony Johnson at 170. Yeah, you got a point. | ||
| You got a point. | ||
| That might be it. | ||
| Okay, here we go. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| Looking for the right hand. | ||
| This is what you gotta do to beat Cowboy. | ||
| You gotta really turn it on early, man. | ||
| Cowboy takes a while to warm up. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| Cowboy's a guy that recovers very well from a loss. | ||
| But already we're seeing a big difference in... | ||
| Physical strength. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| He's on on him. | ||
| We're seeing that early. | ||
| That's not a fluke. | ||
| There's something to say about that. | ||
| Unless he gasses out, we're going to see a lot of this. | ||
| He puts him against the fence pretty easily. | ||
| I mean, Donald, I'm so used to seeing Donald just a bigger, taller dude. | ||
| This is interesting, man. | ||
| Oh, that's a hard knee to the body, dude. | ||
| Yo, these are hard knees to the body, man. | ||
| You can't take too many of these. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| That looked like it hurt him. | ||
| That looked like a Hoist Gracie knee. | ||
| That's what I'm going to call him from now on. | ||
| What's Gracie need? | ||
| Oh shit, another knee to the body. | ||
| If Donald gets him going backwards, homeboy's fucked. | ||
| Brazilian cowboy's spitting. | ||
| He's telegraphing this. | ||
| Come on, Troni. | ||
| Look at where his hips are. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He does like Bruce Lee Droney's haircut's interesting What? | |
| Oof. | ||
| God, he is winging him. | ||
| Yeah, Donald's got to drag this guy into some deeper water, huh? | ||
| Dude, he's just way bigger. | ||
| Donald's in shape, though. | ||
| Donald's in shape, and this dude's fading. | ||
| He's fading a little bit. | ||
| Took a big, deep breath right there. | ||
| Yeah, he's fading a little bit. | ||
| Dude, if I'm Brazilian Cowboy, do it, bro. | ||
| You only got two rounds max. | ||
| Yeah, but what if he goes after him here and gasses himself out with a minute left? | ||
| He might not be able to make it. | ||
| You're going to get your ass whooped anyways. | ||
| We really have no idea what kind of conditioning he has, right? | ||
| We're just guessing. | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Cowboy! | ||
| I like that, son! | ||
| Look at that! | ||
| Cowboy's jiu-jitsu is very underrated, man. | ||
| He's a motherfucker. | ||
| Right there, it could be over. | ||
| It could be over just right with that. | ||
| With that, it could be over. | ||
| Just don't remove your head from the ground and inch by inch set that up. | ||
| It could be over. | ||
| It's so hard to find out when a guy is coming in on two weeks notice. | ||
| It's so hard to find out what he had been doing before he got that call. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Armbar. | |
| Good control by Cowboy. | ||
| Good mount. | ||
| Oh, triangle. | ||
| It's over. | ||
| Yeah, Cowboy! | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's over. | |
| Yeah, son! | ||
| It's over. | ||
| He's got it locked up. | ||
| He's tapping. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's tapping. | |
| Oh, yeah! | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| That's a big fucking win, baby. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He triangled him. | |
| Oh, my goodness. | ||
| Fuck yeah, Cowboy. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| He mounted, triangled him and rolled him over. | ||
| That was some serious jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Nasty jiu-jitsu, man. | ||
| I'm telling you, jiu-jitsu's underrated. | ||
| Dude, that was some shit. | ||
| That being said, I don't like Cowboy at 170 after seeing that. | ||
| What are you talking about? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You don't? | |
| No, I don't. | ||
| Why not? | ||
| Because I think he got out-muscled. | ||
| I think if he fought the top echelon guy... | ||
| He can get stronger. | ||
| He can get stronger. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| I think he won. | ||
| This is like... | ||
| He did, for sure. | ||
| But he did, you're right. | ||
| He did get thrown around, but I think he could fix that. | ||
| Brendan is a glass is half empty sort of fella. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, not at all. | |
| The guy just wins a beautiful fucking triangle victory. | ||
| I don't like him at 170. No, he's my boy. | ||
| He's not strong. | ||
| He can't take him down. | ||
| He's not strong enough. | ||
| Oh, he did take him down. | ||
| Strong. | ||
| Strong jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Strong jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Look at this recovery here, too. | ||
| I like this, man. | ||
| Good stabilization. | ||
| Not only that, but he steps right over into the triangle. | ||
| That is fucking beautiful, man. | ||
| That must be a clamping lockdown of a triangle. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Super nasty. | ||
| Look how he gets it over the ankle nice. | ||
| He tapped early. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| He tapped quick. | ||
| And he held it. | ||
| He's like, is this good? | ||
| Are we good here? | ||
| Is that Mario? | ||
| I don't know who it was. | ||
| Dude, that was a quick triangle. | ||
| There was no fight. | ||
| There was no struggle. | ||
| There was a lot of defensive things he could have did. | ||
| There's things he could have went to. | ||
| He just tapped. | ||
| That's beautiful. | ||
| Cowboy's such a star. | ||
| People love that dude. | ||
| He needed to win. | ||
| Man, he's happy. | ||
| Yeah, Oliveira seems like a real nice guy. | ||
| I would just like to have seen Oliveira with a real camp. | ||
| It's like when you see a real talented guy like that, it's nice to come in and step in on two weeks' notice. | ||
| It's a win-win camp. | ||
| I would like to see him in a camp with Tyron Woodley's suit. | ||
| What a handsome fellow. | ||
| Dude, Woodley on this show, I've never watched him as the analyst. | ||
| He's a beast, man. | ||
| He's very, very good. | ||
| They won't let you on that show anymore. | ||
| Is that what I hear? | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| Talk a little too much shit. | ||
| Talk a little too much shit, Joe. | ||
| Would you want to do it, Ian? | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| You'd be great at that shit. | ||
| I can't fight for very much longer with all this shit. | ||
| I think. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We'll see. | |
| I'm going to keep trying. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I'm not brain dead yet, but my body sucks. | ||
| Yeah, but you're a good analyst. | ||
| You're very good at breaking down fights and talking about shit. | ||
| You're smart, dude. | ||
| I would love to do it. | ||
| I'd love to do it somewhere. | ||
| Why don't you ask for UFC to fucking sneak in there? | ||
| I think I have. | ||
| Uncle Creepy and they said no? | ||
| I'm pretty sure. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's tough. | ||
| It's a tough rotation, Joe, to get in there. | ||
| A lot of guys waiting. | ||
| A lot of guys trying to get in. | ||
| Because they should have more than one of those fucking things. | ||
| They only have one. | ||
| What do you mean they only have one? | ||
| They should have a gang of these UFC shows. | ||
| Shows? | ||
| With a bunch of different people running them. | ||
| Just like podcasts. | ||
| Let people figure out what they like. | ||
| You can have a hundred of those fucking things. | ||
| Well, Ian, do you have a podcast? | ||
| No, not really. | ||
| Stop waiting for a fox to pull their head out of their ass and get your own shit going. | ||
| You should totally do a podcast, and if you did a podcast like Uncle Creepy's MMA picks, just a week of the fights. | ||
| Creepy MMA. That's it. | ||
| You could get it ready for the week of the fights, and you could talk mad shit, you could suck on your vaporizer, you could do it all on YouTube. | ||
| Where's that thing at? | ||
| I agree. | ||
| Especially if you really feel like your body's telling you, hey, this is the last go-around. | ||
| Get ready for something new, and that's a good way to do it. | ||
| And that way, you could use the vape pen, and you're like, what are you going to do? | ||
| Are you going to test me? | ||
| What are you going to do? | ||
| Tell me I can't do this anymore? | ||
| I'm not doing it anymore anyway. | ||
| I'll do something. | ||
| I'll figure it out. | ||
| Because I'm just saying that doing it through Fox, you've got to get sanctioned if you're going to do it through a production company or any of those. | ||
| And it's hard. | ||
| A bunch of steps, yeah. | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| Big Brown's been through the hoops. | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| You know what it is? | ||
| I've had a lot of people promise me they're going to help me do it and help me figure it out because I'm kind of retarded. | ||
| With the podcast? | ||
| With podcasts and all that stuff and then it's just never happened and I guess I'm too lazy on my own so I haven't done it. | ||
| That's a problem. | ||
| You can't be lazy. | ||
| You've got to make shit happen. | ||
| Well, I mean, now it's getting to the point where I have to. | ||
| I don't have a choice. | ||
| You've got to make it happen, man. | ||
| You can do it. | ||
| You've got a great personality. | ||
| You talk a lot of shit. | ||
| You've been in the cage. | ||
| A lot of experience. | ||
| You've been in super fucking crazy matches. | ||
| Dude, personality. | ||
| You got it. | ||
| Dude, talk to Boy McCarty. | ||
| Unless you got another... | ||
| You got another idea. | ||
| I mean, if you got something else that you're thinking, that's perfect for you. | ||
| But you're a great personality, and outside of MMA, you have great opinions on all kinds of shit. | ||
| Like, you could talk shit about everything. | ||
| You know, and Brendan, and Brian, and I, and Eddie, and all of us have proven, you don't have to be an expert in things to talk about them. | ||
| We've talked about everything from fucking genetics to rocket travel. | ||
| 9-11 inside job? | ||
| 9-11 inside job or not? | ||
| Do I want an inside job? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| 9-11, inside job or not? | ||
| Don't do it. | ||
| That's a no. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| Don't answer that. | ||
| See? | ||
| You're already smart. | ||
| Get Eddie another beer. | ||
| Let's go down the rabbit hole. | ||
| Real quick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Real quick. | |
| Chemtrails, yes or no. | ||
| Vaccines, a killer or an aide? | ||
| How many towers went down on 9-11? | ||
| Two or three. | ||
| We don't want to go down here, brother. | ||
| Three, right? | ||
| No, he knows. | ||
| My brother's crazy like you are, so I hear some of this stuff. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Donald Cerrone, very happy. | ||
| The fact that he knows that three towers went down means that you know your shit. | ||
| Kind of everybody knows. | ||
| No, most people don't know. | ||
| They'll say two. | ||
| Most people don't know. | ||
| Most people do not know three towers went down. | ||
| Look at Jamie trying to save the show by turning up Donald's interview. | ||
| Way to go in the background Starts showing towers falling Is there a button that you press Underneath the tape That's what he does He puts chemtrails on the background That's how he gets you That's Southwest right there Cowboy's such a fucking beast He took a fight against me on short notice. | ||
| That's a strong, strong try. | ||
| Who's he supposed to fight? | ||
| You're supposed to fight the dirty bird. | ||
| Tim Means. | ||
| Tim Means. | ||
| Test positive. | ||
| Tim Means to this day denies he took anything wrong. | ||
| He said he took a supplement. | ||
| Everyone does that though, you know? | ||
| Well, yeah. | ||
| Has anybody ever said, okay, fuck, I was trying to get yolk, yo. | ||
| Here's what I was going to say. | ||
| I regret it. | ||
| Here's what I was going to say. | ||
| The USADA people tell us that everything, all that shit that you're buying at fucking GNC, everything is suspect. | ||
| They have a list on the USADA page where you should go. | ||
| Anybody that's thinking about competing in anything where you get tested, go to that list. | ||
| It's insane how big it is. | ||
| Well, if you're buying testosterone boosters from GNC, yeah, you're an idiot. | ||
| Dude, I've been taking supplements all my life. | ||
| I've been tested all my life. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Never once. | |
| But you haven't been tested under the USADA guidelines. | ||
| NCAA? I got tested the other day. | ||
| I mean, like a motherfucker. | ||
| The only thing I've been taking is Onnit stuff. | ||
| And I was doing Daniele Bolelli's podcast. | ||
| They want to outlaw Onnit, by the way. | ||
| They called me and they're like, hey, where are you? | ||
| In LA? Like, well, we went by your house. | ||
| You're not there. | ||
| I'm like, yeah, I'm in LA. Went by your gym. | ||
| You're not there. | ||
| I'm like, yes, I'm in LA. Here's my address. | ||
| Meet me here. | ||
| So after... | ||
| So you have to drop whatever you're doing. | ||
| What if you had tickets to the most awesome show? | ||
| Like you're going to go to a play or something like that with your lady? | ||
| How long does it take to do this? | ||
| Once they contact you, it has to be within an hour. | ||
| So they drove. | ||
| I was literally parking. | ||
| That's so annoying. | ||
| I know. | ||
| So why don't you dickholes meet me at like 6 o'clock in the morning when I'm waking up? | ||
| If you don't make it happen, positive test. | ||
| Or you get three strikes, right? | ||
| That happened to Cowboy. | ||
| Cowboy was in fucking Vegas for the UFC. They showed up as a ranch. | ||
| He's like, where are you at? | ||
| He's like, I'm in Vegas. | ||
| You have to tell us, I'm working for the UFC. I'm in Vegas. | ||
| And they gave him a failure to notify... | ||
| Oh, fuck off. | ||
| Bunch of squares, man. | ||
| I got one of those for not filling out my... | ||
| Am I going to get in trouble for even talking about this? | ||
| I don't care. | ||
| We'll figure it out. | ||
| But for not filling out my whereabouts in time. | ||
| And they sent me a letter, and I was like, Dad, look. | ||
| It's like the fucking principal sent me a letter. | ||
| Well, you know, it all is with good intentions. | ||
| They're trying to catch more people. | ||
| I think it's good, but you know. | ||
| They're catching a lot of people. | ||
| Which is pretty fucking funny. | ||
| Catch a lot of people. | ||
| If it was up to you, a lot of fighters aren't fighting the same. | ||
| If it was up to you, would you legalize PEDs? | ||
| If it was up to you. | ||
| That's a slippery slope. | ||
| That's a tough fucking slope. | ||
| I mean, it was legal in Pride. | ||
| Look what happened there. | ||
| What's going to happen? | ||
| Well, Pride would happen. | ||
| It's tough, man. | ||
| What do you think, Joe? | ||
| It won't be mainstream if you do that. | ||
| Here's a problem. | ||
| What we're trying to do is stop progress. | ||
| The reason why steroids are awesome is because they work really good at changing your body, making you perform better. | ||
| Ultimately, when we're watching fighting, what are we trying to see? | ||
| We're trying to see people perform at their best. | ||
| So we're keeping them from the knowledge that we're currently aware of. | ||
| What are we currently aware of when it comes to performing handsome drugs? | ||
| If you use them, your body will work better. | ||
| Your body will be stronger, it'll move quicker, you have more endurance, you'll be able to perform tasks with much more veracity and intensity for longer periods of time. | ||
| So how come they can't do it? | ||
| Because using that knowledge right now is forbidden. | ||
| But it's going to come a point in time, whether it's a year from now or 20 years from now or 30 years from now, where they're going to have some undeniable shit that everybody's taking. | ||
| That people are just normally taking because it keeps you from getting sick. | ||
| It changes the way your body works. | ||
| A regular person's body looks like Yoel Romero's body. | ||
| We're all going to take it. | ||
| Everyone's going to take it. | ||
| Athletes would be taken. | ||
| Right, but then it's going to get real super weird. | ||
| It's like, well, what happened all those years when you couldn't take it or you had a high that you were taking it? | ||
| Because now they're going to have stuff that makes you... | ||
| There's not going to be people anymore. | ||
| We're going to come a time when 30 or 40 years where genetic engineering has reached a point where we're engineering human beings. | ||
| Nah, I don't want to be around that. | ||
| You're going to have a designer. | ||
| Why? | ||
| It's going to be awesome. | ||
| I'm going to be the Hulk. | ||
| Fuck off. | ||
| I'm going to jump over buildings. | ||
| Joe, you're going to be 110. We're all going to be 110. But you're going to be 110 with the science that comes from surviving till then. | ||
| They say that if you can live today, if you're like a 30-year-old guy today, and you could live to be 50, you could probably live to be 200. Fuck off, for reals. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes, for reals. | |
| That's the best news I've heard all day. | ||
| They're talking about, within our lifetime, some groundbreaking, life-changing shit in life extension and how long you can live and how healthy you can be. | ||
| That's awesome, man. | ||
| That Dr. Peter Welling, whatever his name is, the Regenicene doctor, they're that close to some new thing they're going to do with collagen. | ||
| I don't know how it works, but apparently the breakthrough, if they can prove what they believe they can prove and do what they think they can do, they're going to be able to regenerate collagen in people. | ||
| Like what makes someone an old person is your collagen sort of falls apart. | ||
| Your face gets all droopy. | ||
| You lose the elasticity. | ||
| Well, they're going to be able to regenerate that. | ||
| How much is that shit going to cost before it goes through masses? | ||
| Why is the glass half full with this fucking guy? | ||
| Hey, Joe, half full or am I a realist? | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Half full is actually meaning... | ||
| Oh, gotcha. | ||
| I thought you called me a hater again. | ||
| Okay, gotcha. | ||
| I was joking. | ||
| Gotcha. | ||
| I actually said it wrong. | ||
| I meant to say half empty. | ||
| But that is what you're doing. | ||
| He's trying to help you, Brandon. | ||
| You're gonna you're gonna have to accept science Brandon Chubb Say if you were a kid if you were a kid and you got polio, you know back in the day it was over And then they had to come up with the vaccines and then all of a sudden, no polio. | ||
| I mean, this thing about all the different things that they figured out today. | ||
| You used to break your leg three, four hundred years ago. | ||
| You're fucked! | ||
| Now you break your leg, they fucking screw some plates in that bitch, stitch you all up, and you're good to go. | ||
| I mean, Uncle Creepy's had how many fucking surgeries? | ||
| Think about that. | ||
| All the stuff that you had done to you, if you lived 500 years ago, you'd be a dead man. | ||
| I'd be fucked, yeah. | ||
| You'd be dead. | ||
| And I would be too, and you'd be all fucked up, and you would be fucked up, because you've had hernia surgery. | ||
| I don't know about that. | ||
| I think I'd be alive. | ||
| Yeah, you'd be fine, but you'd have big holes where you're... | ||
| But I got hernias for screaming and yelling, and I wouldn't be screaming and yelling in 17 AD. You might. | ||
| You would definitely be screaming and yelling, Don't eat me! | ||
| You'd be running for these fucking zombie hordes. | ||
| But my point is that... | ||
| These guys are going to keep innovating. | ||
| Every new invention opens the door for other new inventions. | ||
| Every new technology opens the door for a whole branch of new technologies that are going to come from it. | ||
| And so they're on their way to figuring out how to regenerate tissue, the stem cell shit that they're doing today. | ||
| You know, I mean, they're doing some really insane... | ||
| Boss Rootin was telling me about how they shot stem cells in them intravenously. | ||
| That's the day with me. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Intervenous stem cell and then spot injection. | ||
| Where do they get the stem cells? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Are you sure it wasn't PRP? I was both. | |
| No. | ||
| But I had both of them done. | ||
| But stem cells is stem cells. | ||
| They are doing stem cells now. | ||
| The one that I did in Vegas was from a woman's placenta from young women that gets a Syrian section to take the placenta and they converted stem cells. | ||
| When they did it to you, what did it feel like when they shot it intravenously? | ||
| I didn't feel anything. | ||
| Nothing? | ||
| I was sitting there and, you know, we got it done. | ||
| Did it work? | ||
| Did you feel, like, amazing? | ||
| Well, I mean, it's all here, but my shoulder is healed up. | ||
| This arm's still smaller than this one. | ||
| But it just keeps coming out of socket? | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| I had torn all four of those parts, you know? | ||
| And now this thing just popped. | ||
| I felt the pop down here in, like, the muscle tendon tissue. | ||
| Oh, so it had nothing to do with the... | ||
| Well, I tore down here a little bit when I tore my shoulder, and now this is kind of where it popped. | ||
| So it tore again, so there's issues with the whole chain. | ||
| Yeah, just the whole chain. | ||
| I've been fighting with one arm for one hand at least for a couple years now. | ||
| Doing work, though. | ||
| One arm. | ||
| Punching people with this thing sucks. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| God damn, you can't make a fist either? | ||
| Yeah, he can't make a fist, no. | ||
| Or the one finger. | ||
| That's incredible. | ||
| You can fire up that podcast. | ||
| You've had that operated on a few times, right? | ||
|
unidentified
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What? | |
| Two and a half times. | ||
| You better get on that. | ||
| Let's go and fire that podcast up, son. | ||
| Who wants to start a podcast? | ||
| But yeah, I've had my hand broken twice, three operations, and then one bad MRSA infection. | ||
| That was fun. | ||
| MRSA's scary shit, huh? | ||
| Super scary. | ||
| Having MRSA, because I ended up in Brazil with a blood infection. | ||
| I don't know if it was MRSA or not, but it was in my blood. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| I had this infection. | ||
| In Brazil? | ||
| Remember when I went to fight Lineker the first time and I made Wayans? | ||
| That's what happened? | ||
| I walked in the back and I took one bite of fruit and then just... | ||
| And you know Isabella? | ||
| Isabella? | ||
| Yeah, the girl that runs the shows down there. | ||
| Probably know of our face. | ||
| She was just like, everyone get out. | ||
| Everyone out. | ||
| And they just hooked me up with IVs. | ||
| So what kind of blood infection was it, did they say? | ||
| I didn't ask. | ||
| How about Denny's knee? | ||
| Nobody knew. | ||
| Denny, he did the last EBI, EBI 5. He looked good, too. | ||
| He looked good, but he didn't train at all for that. | ||
| Nobody knew. | ||
| No, he wasn't going to do it. | ||
| He had MRSA inside his knee the whole training camp. | ||
| Yeah, I didn't tell people who it was, but I put the picture of his knee up on my Instagram. | ||
| Put it, see if you can find it, Jamie. | ||
| It's from a few months ago. | ||
| Yeah, he was right in the middle of EBI 5 training camp, and I gave him, I said, you know what, I'm not going to pull you. | ||
| And he goes, let's wait until two weeks before the show and we'll see where we're at. | ||
| And that two week mark, that's when he started, he was able to roll light. | ||
| So we're like, you want to go for it? | ||
| There was so many times where it was 100% that he was out, but I wouldn't, I just said, let's wait, let's see what happens. | ||
| Those fucking pictures of his knee, no one knew who the fuck that was. | ||
| No, I didn't say who it was. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I put the pictures up on Instagram because I wanted to alert people to the dangers of staph infection. | ||
| Because a lot of jujitsu places, they don't tell people about staph. | ||
| And so you get like a bump on your knee and you don't know what the fuck it is. | ||
| And then it gets worse and then you ignore it. | ||
| And then it gets to the point where it's systemic. | ||
| If you think you have a pimple or a spider bite and you keep itching something and it keeps getting bigger and bigger, you might have staph. | ||
| You might have MRSA. If you think there was a spider bite on you, on your leg or your arm, or a pimple that just got infected, run to the hospital. | ||
| That's what I thought. | ||
| Denny could have died, man. | ||
| I thought it was a spider bite in my armpit. | ||
| I was wrestling and... | ||
| I sent a picture of my coaches, a big ass thing. | ||
| I go, hey man, I think I got a spider bite. | ||
| And he goes, have you been to fucking Africa lately? | ||
| What spider would do that? | ||
| That's staph. | ||
| It was like huge, two white bubbles out of my armpit. | ||
| Nasty, man. | ||
| Where'd you go, Africa? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Where the fuck you been, Africa? | ||
| The first time I had it was in my knee. | ||
| Fucking a decade ago. | ||
| Right when Mercer first came out. | ||
| And Mike Guymon had it. | ||
| And he goes, hey, get to the hospital. | ||
| God damn. | ||
| There's something fucking wrong with you. | ||
| That's Denny's knee. | ||
| That was like... | ||
| Three weeks before EBI. What a badass. | ||
| He did it. | ||
| He did it. | ||
| I just had to put that up there. | ||
| That's Denny Procopo's knee. | ||
| He's such a nice guy too, man. | ||
| He was in the hospital for a week. | ||
| He was in the hospital for a week. | ||
| They had a suction machine on his knee all day, every day. | ||
| A machine that sucked shit out of his knee. | ||
| That's a bummer. | ||
| I think Joe Riggs went down from a broken arm. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah? | |
| Yeah, he went down and immediately grabbed his arm when he went down. | ||
| He tried blocking the knee with his forearm? | ||
| Yeah, he blocked those ruthless, Kamosi knees. | ||
| I think he might have broken his arm. | ||
| Good for Kamosi, man. | ||
| Good for him. | ||
| Kenny's back! | ||
| First time Kenny's back, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, that whole situation. | ||
| I'm glad he didn't completely lose his job, because it's not like Kenny doesn't know a lot about MMA. But you've got to give credit where credit's deserved. | ||
| Yeah, he can't do that. | ||
| And now he'll know, and he'll never do it again, you know? | ||
| I'm a fan of a guy getting a second chance. | ||
| Four, five, six. | ||
| Oh my god, six hard, full power hits. | ||
| That's how many times Hoyce hit Ken Shamrock. | ||
| Six hits. | ||
| And the side of the face. | ||
| Bah, bah, bah! | ||
| I think, first of all, Ken needs a fucking diamond MMA cup. | ||
| You know, he needs one of them compression cups. | ||
| I wish we had gotten them. | ||
| And you know when they say wrestlers, no matter what the strategy is, like if a wrestler wants to stand, you know, his strategy is to stand in bag. | ||
| People say that when the chaos sets in, wrestlers revert to their wrestling, and in the chaos, they're going to shoot. | ||
| They're going to shoot, right? | ||
| I think, I swear, I think Ken reverts to pro wrestling or something. | ||
| It's just how many times against the soccer robber fight, he goes down, he's complaining, he's always complaining. | ||
| There's always some kind of complaint at the end. | ||
| That's like wrestling and shit. | ||
| To me, isn't that what they do in pro wrestling? | ||
| Wow, yeah. | ||
| It's like he's reverting to that act. | ||
| He's like a showman. | ||
| Yeah, he's reverting to that showmanism. | ||
| Because I've seen guys get kicked in the nuts horribly and they didn't, you know what I'm saying? | ||
|
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|
I'm not saying he purposely stopped, but that delay was interesting. | |
| Do you think it's possible that he got hit in the nuts and he's like, this is my way out? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I'm not saying that happened, but that's an option. | ||
| I didn't think that at all. | ||
| I'm not saying I think that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What did you think? | |
| I thought, well, I had to see the replay to see that he got kicked in the nuts because Jimmy Smith seemed to be incredulous at first. | ||
| He was saying that it was a shot to the head and that maybe Ken had gotten knocked out maybe and thought he got hit in the nuts or something. | ||
| But when they showed it again, they went one step before. | ||
| You see it's clear. | ||
| It definitely goes right to the nuts. | ||
| And the way he's adjusting it... | ||
| That sounds to me like you didn't have a good cup, you know? | ||
| If you have a Thai steel cup, or if you have a real good, like a Diamond MMA compression insurance cup, it wouldn't affect you that bad. | ||
| Because it wasn't like Melvin Manhoof was needing him. | ||
| It wasn't that low. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| I'm just saying I've seen worse nut shots where guys are like, damn, bro. | ||
| I'm like, hold up. | ||
| Back, hold up. | ||
| And then you get five minutes. | ||
| He's 52. He's 50. Those nuts hang low. | ||
| It might have been real bad. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm not saying that. | ||
| What about the delay, though? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What about the delay, though? | |
| What about the delay? | ||
| They were actually under the cuff. | ||
| Have we ever seen a delay like that? | ||
| They were hanging on the outside. | ||
| That's what I'm thinking. | ||
| Have we ever seen a delay like that, though? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| A guy get in the balls, and then there's a delay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's a delay. | |
| There's always a delay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| There's always a delay. | ||
| Okay, so that wasn't odd. | ||
| See, I thought that was odd, but if you don't think that was odd, I believe you guys. | ||
| You guys are the encyclopedia. | ||
| Why is that? | ||
| The delay is automatic. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Why is that? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| The brain's like, ah, fuck. | ||
| But in MMA, though, in MMA, when a guy gets hit in the balls and there's a break, it's the hit in the balls and he goes, boom, in the break. | ||
| There's never a hit in the balls. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wait a while. | |
| You know what? | ||
| That's the longest delay I've ever seen. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Eddie has a good point. | ||
| Watch it again. | ||
| We never see that in MMA. Well, when you watch it again, let's take a look at it again, because it's kind of a crazy... | ||
| The delay is long. | ||
| Yeah, we never see that. | ||
| You get hit in the balls and the guy goes, okay, fall! | ||
| Joe has a good point. | ||
| We've never seen a 50-year-old get hit in the nuts, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| And they're exchanging shots. | ||
| Okay, there was a nut shot right there. | ||
| And Hoist hit him good on the chin, though. | ||
| The one on the chin was good. | ||
| The takedown's good. | ||
| Hammer fist is good. | ||
| Oh, wait a minute. | ||
| Now, from that angle, maybe he was holding his balls. | ||
| He was definitely holding his balls. | ||
| He was holding his balls. | ||
| But that's a legit knockdown. | ||
| The knee to the face is legit. | ||
| The knee is before... | ||
| See, this is what you're talking about. | ||
| This seems kind of... | ||
| Acted out. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| Okay, ball shot. | ||
| But watch this right to the chin. | ||
| Look how long it takes. | ||
| Okay, we need to see the whole thing. | ||
| They didn't show the knee to the chin. | ||
| Back it up again, Jamie. | ||
| When he did take him down, now that I see, it did look like he was complaining about the balls. | ||
| Once the fight got to the ground. | ||
| Go way back, Jamie. | ||
| I'm starting to look at things differently now. | ||
| If you know it's going to be over, you're going to try and sell it. | ||
| But watch it here. | ||
| But why would he think it was over just because it got taken down? | ||
| Here, we're going to watch the whole fight. | ||
| Here it goes. | ||
| Okay, where's the ball shot? | ||
| Right there. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| Right there. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| Look how long it is. | ||
| That's the one that landed the balls, and that's the one on the chin. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| The right knee. | ||
| Is he holding his balls? | ||
| Is he hurt right there? | ||
| Yes, he's holding his balls. | ||
| But was it from the face shot? | ||
| Well, he definitely got dropped from a hard knee to the face. | ||
| Those are some solid shots, though. | ||
| In the nuts and face. | ||
| But he did yell and say, you hit me in the balls. | ||
| There should be a rematch, then. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh no, we don't need to do that. | |
| There's enough controversy in this to have an immediate rematch. | ||
| Or a GoFundMe, where everybody donates a dollar to make sure Bellator never does this again. | ||
| I'll text Rich Cho tonight after this. | ||
| And Ken, he sort of recovered his composure. | ||
| I have nothing against 50-year-old fighting. | ||
| You guys have something against that? | ||
| What's wrong with a guy that's 55 fighting? | ||
| I don't enjoy it. | ||
| As long as they're both 50, I don't have a problem with it. | ||
| Who cares? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't enjoy it. | |
| As long as they're both the same age where you know you're not dealing with one guy. | ||
| There's badass 55-year-olds out there. | ||
| Chuck Norris at 55 was the shit. | ||
| I'm not watching it. | ||
| You don't want to see Chuck Norris at 55 fight in Rumble. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| I don't see 55-year-olds fight, man. | ||
| It's not my cup of tea. | ||
| And why not? | ||
| It's very reasonable. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why not? | |
| Very reasonable. | ||
| Especially two legends. | ||
| I like to remember them as the legends. | ||
| I don't like seeing six-year-old fights either. | ||
| No, me neither, bro. | ||
| What about an eight-year-old? | ||
| Six-year-old Taekwondo kids head-kicking each other. | ||
| Yeah, I don't see that. | ||
| That counts. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't see that. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I run the kids' program at Oyama's. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| I don't let them spar. | ||
| Like, I don't want to see Larry Bird. | ||
| Do you let them light spar? | ||
| Do they go through the movements? | ||
| Yeah, to the body. | ||
| They kind of touch. | ||
| I let them play like Taekwondo kids. | ||
| They just touch. | ||
| Makes sense. | ||
| But Tyrone Woodley, what a strong beard game. | ||
| No respect for the internal organs. | ||
| He's in a weird spot, huh? | ||
| Woodley's in a weird spot. | ||
| He deserves a title shot, sort of, but no one wants to see it. | ||
| Wonderboy outshined him. | ||
| Oh my god, did he? | ||
| So now everyone's demanding Wonderboy, and the way the UFC works, but I think Woodley's still getting the title shot. | ||
| Is he? | ||
| Well, if it's going to go Rory and... | ||
| It might not. | ||
| I'm not saying it is, but let's say they do Rory vs. | ||
| Wonderboy, Woodley would have to get the title shot. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Or, dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, Conor wins quick against Dos Anjos and says, Robbie Loder, if you've got any fucking courage. | ||
| Oh, he trumps all. | ||
| He trumps all. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He trumps all. | |
| Then that's the fight. | ||
| Then we're all fucked, because that's the fight. | ||
| If he beats Dos Anjos and challenges Lawler, the world ends. | ||
| No one watches anything. | ||
| Everything goes down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Except for Conor. | |
| Every show on television says, we're just going to take the night off. | ||
| There's no need for anything other than this. | ||
| We'll throw some children's shows on Nickelodeon. | ||
| Where would they have it? | ||
| Oh, they'd have to have it on the moon. | ||
| Crow Park? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Richard Branson would be shuttling motherfuckers up to the moon. | |
| Every channel would have reruns on Killigan's Island. | ||
| So if he beat Dos Anjos and then he beats Robbie Lawler, is he the greatest fighter of all time? | ||
| He's the greatest ever. | ||
| If he beats Dos Anjos, he's in the running to be the greatest ever. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| He's in the running. | ||
| Look, I say the greatest ever a little bit too liberally. | ||
| I'll be honest. | ||
| I know I do. | ||
| But it's tough to find a guy who's even close to as exciting in what he's attempting to accomplish. | ||
| It's easy when you go back after the dust has settled and say, well, you've got to look at Fedor like Fedor was the greatest ever. | ||
| Yes, he was one of the greatest ever, for sure. | ||
| At that time, for sure. | ||
| I think Anderson, if I look at movements and what he's doing, I kind of give the edge to Anderson, but I can see the argument. | ||
| But if Conor can beat Dos Anjos and he starches him... | ||
| I don't see any argument. | ||
| Especially with the level the game's at right now. | ||
| Especially since we've already seen Fedor go down and get knocked the fuck out a few times. | ||
| Same thing with Anderson. | ||
| We've already seen them go down. | ||
| We haven't seen Conor go down, so you've got to give the edge to Conor so far. | ||
| Sort of, but we haven't seen Conor fight the kind of guys that Fedor fought in his prime, walked down Crow Cop, remember that? | ||
| You know, the Randleman one. | ||
| Again, one-dimensional guys. | ||
| A lot of one-dimensional guys. | ||
| Conor's fighting the best of the best, and they're all good at everything. | ||
| It was just a different time back then. | ||
| No, it's not their fault. | ||
| I'm just saying, if Conor were to win three belts, he's by far the best. | ||
| Oh, hands down. | ||
| That's like Mackenzie Dern versus Paige Van Zandt right there. | ||
| Well, it's a guy who really didn't... | ||
| We're looking at Cody Garbrandt, and what's the guy's name? | ||
| Taquino? | ||
| Augusto Mendez. | ||
| He just doesn't have the stand-up to stand with a vicious, nasty boxer. | ||
| For a long time, yeah. | ||
| Garbrandt can crack. | ||
| He's got really good timing. | ||
| He's real confident with his striking, and he's just out showing up. | ||
| What do you guys think of Anderson Silva-Bisby? | ||
| Is that next week? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Who's in town? | ||
| I'm out of town, unfortunately. | ||
| Son of a bitch. | ||
| I'll be here. | ||
| I'm out of town. | ||
| How dare you have another life? | ||
| I so wish I didn't. | ||
| What day is that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Saturday? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| That's an interesting fight, though, at this point in Anderson's life. | ||
| Because, you know... | ||
| What do you think's gonna happen, though? | ||
| Depends what Anderson comes. | ||
| It depends on how much Bisping can get in his head. | ||
| Bisping talks mad shit. | ||
| He's already been mocking him about Viagra and all that. | ||
| That's not gonna work, I don't think. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Look, Anderson had a hard time pulling the trigger against Nick Diaz. | ||
| I think Bisping beats him. | ||
| Do you really? | ||
| In a decision. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| And he started crying after. | ||
| He broke down crying after. | ||
| And then with all this shit that's gone on, I mean... | ||
| You know what the X factor is here? | ||
| Fucking Bisping's left eye. | ||
| And against Southpaw's, he gets fucking kicks. | ||
| It's his right eye. | ||
| It's his right eye, sorry. | ||
| And against Southpaw's, he eats fucking left kicks and left hands. | ||
| That could be a factor for sure. | ||
| Huge factor. | ||
| You know, another factor could be he's fighting in England. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| He's never lost in England. | ||
| Dude, he's an animal in England. | ||
| They fucking love him. | ||
| There's very few places where he goes where he gets that kind of round of applause. | ||
| When he goes to America, he gets booed all the time. | ||
| He's never been a fan favorite here. | ||
| No, but in England, man, I've called his fights in Manchester. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That's his shit, son. | ||
| When he gets out there, man, they go fucking bananas. | ||
| It's a good fight. | ||
| I think Bisping wins, though. | ||
| They go bananas. | ||
| Look, you gotta give that guy his props because Mike Bisping is fucking... | ||
| He is lasting. | ||
| Dude, he's fought everybody. | ||
| He's only lost a few guys. | ||
| And most are PD users. | ||
| And he doesn't lose his enthusiasm. | ||
| He keeps getting better and better, little by little, each fight. | ||
| And his mental toughness. | ||
| Unbelievable. | ||
| I've never trained with anyone like him. | ||
| When he fights, he says the best shit. | ||
| In what way? | ||
| When he drills, he's going full speed, drilling, boom, just nonstop, moving, nonstop. | ||
| Crazy cardio. | ||
| His cardio is resting heart rate. | ||
| It's 34 beats a minute. | ||
| Dude, he's like a hummingbird. | ||
| I've never seen anything like it. | ||
| It's incredible. | ||
| Wearing guys out just drilling. | ||
| So what do you think it is that kept him from beating all the best guys? | ||
| There's just something. | ||
| It's that it factor. | ||
| Knockout power. | ||
| He doesn't have any knockout power. | ||
| He's good at everything, but he's not great at anything. | ||
| Jason Perillo told me he hits hard. | ||
| He said he holds the pad for him. | ||
| He goes, don't let anybody tell you this guy doesn't hit hard. | ||
| Well, no, that's great. | ||
| His coach said that. | ||
| I'm going based off his 30 fights. | ||
| Well, yeah. | ||
| The guys he stopped, he stopped like Kung Lee from like a barrage of shots. | ||
| Kung Lee stopped fucking... | ||
| Jorge Rivera. | ||
| Yes, Jorge. | ||
| Jason Miller. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Like straight KO power. | ||
| No. | ||
| No. | ||
| There's just something there. | ||
| Not that kind of fighter. | ||
| Different kind of fighter. | ||
| Just a great middleweight, though, man. | ||
| You don't want to fight that guy. | ||
| He's beat some of the best. | ||
| He's lost some of the best. | ||
| He's an animal. | ||
| That's one of the reasons why it was so impressive that Rockhold handled him. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, Jesus. | |
| One of the very few one-armed guillotines ever in the UFC, too. | ||
| Think what set it up. | ||
| That kick. | ||
| Huge. | ||
| That head kick. | ||
| His left side is very powerful. | ||
| And he's so long that you have to kind of stay in his kicking range in order to try to close the distance and get to punching range. | ||
| And that left kick is so powerful. | ||
| You don't want to hold pads for Rockhold when he's throwing that left kick. | ||
| If I'm Anderson Silva, though, man, that's what I'm southpaw and I'm fucking attacking that right eye. | ||
| Talk to Javier Mendez about holding pads for Rockhold. | ||
| It's gotta be horrible. | ||
| Oh my god, you ever see videos of him kicking the pads? | ||
| He's terrifying. | ||
| See if you can find Luke Rockhold kicking the tie pads. | ||
| Dude, he has so much length and torque. | ||
| I think the scariest guy I ever saw kick the pads is Manhoof. | ||
| Manhoof to this day is the scariest guy. | ||
| Pedro Izzo? | ||
| Well, Pedro Izzo hits a bag. | ||
| I've seen him hit a bag really hard, but Manhoof is way faster, more explosive. | ||
| Let me check Rockhold out. | ||
| Give me some volume on this. | ||
| Some fucking power in that leg, son. | ||
| He walks you down and slams that fucking thing in over and over again. | ||
| Rockhold both kicks hard, man. | ||
| He kicks very hard. | ||
| I got to watch Pedro, Peter Ayurts, and Marco Huas. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| Wait, is that Rockhold at the Mayweather gym next? | ||
| Is that what that said? | ||
| Put that up. | ||
| Let me see that. | ||
| At Marco's gym in Laguna Niguel fucking over a decade ago. | ||
| And just seeing these fucking monsters, I was like a little kid like, what the fuck? | ||
| Just doing work. | ||
| How genius is the viral aspect of these YouTube videos where one will show you the next one in the little play thing. | ||
| It starts spinning. | ||
| Like, why don't you stick around? | ||
| Oh, I know. | ||
| You think that's cool? | ||
| Check this out. | ||
| They have it queued up for you. | ||
| That's brilliant. | ||
| YouTube rules. | ||
| Look how Rockhold is fighting with Barefoot here. | ||
| Smart. | ||
| Do you ever go on YouTube and just say, I don't have nothing to watch, but I'm gonna go on YouTube and find something? | ||
| Do you ever do that? | ||
| He's in Mayweather's Gym. | ||
| All the fucking time. | ||
| He's in Mayweather's Gym. | ||
| I go with their suggestions. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I go to my homepage and they have all the shit suggested and I'm like, let's watch some of this shit. | |
| Very entertaining. | ||
| Rockhold's showing some fairly decent boxing. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Those guys get so much power out of their shoes, too. | ||
| Their shoes are so flat and strong. | ||
| The grim. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It definitely helps. | ||
| It's not smart to go with shoes all the time. | ||
| Ooh, it's sneaky. | ||
| Sneaky shoes. | ||
| You've got to go with what you're going to fight. | ||
| You've got to go. | ||
| Yes, I agree. | ||
| Same thing, because side control with wrestling shoes is death. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Death. | |
| Oh, man. | ||
| Dude, you could just drive into them. | ||
| You could weigh 500 pounds on a guy. | ||
| You take the shoes off, it's a little different. | ||
| That's why I was interested in... | ||
| A lot of that pressure's gone. | ||
| Josh Barnett fought Huron. | ||
| And showed up with those wrestling shoes on. | ||
|
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|
And the tights. | |
| And Dean Lister, same thing. | ||
| There's always cons, too. | ||
| You can get foot locks a lot easier. | ||
| It's hard to pull that foot out. | ||
| How gangster is he, then, that he did it with Dean Lister? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| That's Barnett, though. | ||
| He's like, dude, this is what got me to the party. | ||
| Check this shit out. | ||
| Submitted both of them. | ||
| Not only that, he's dressing like an old carny wrestler. | ||
| I mean, he did. | ||
| He had, like, old tight shorts on. | ||
| Not even a Speedo. | ||
| He had, like, a high-waisted... | ||
| He's single-handedly bringing back Kent Wrestling. | ||
| Can you believe he got submitted by Rothwell? | ||
| Anybody can get submitted. | ||
| It doesn't diminish him at all. | ||
| I got submitted five times. | ||
| Barnett's one of the best of all time. | ||
| I love that guy. | ||
| He got cracked, didn't he? | ||
| I can't remember, right? | ||
| No, he shot in. | ||
| I don't remember exactly what the transition was, but that is apparently Rothwell's shit. | ||
| If Rothwell gets a hold of your neck from that ten-finger guillotine position, he just tucks that bitch in tight and chokes the fuck out of you. | ||
| I'm saying if you gave me a hundred guesses, Rothwell's cementum would not be in there. | ||
| I would say the same. | ||
| Do you know the grip he's using? | ||
| What is the grip he's using? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's hidden. | ||
| And you have him and you're stuck to the fence. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's almost like a fence. | |
| Because it's under. | ||
| Rothwell's huge. | ||
| Yeah, he's calling it a go-go choke, right? | ||
| So what that means to me is that he's sticking something into your neck. | ||
| Because he's doing it like a go-go plata where it goes into your windpipe. | ||
| So I'm thinking he's holding his knuckles in some way that he's driving the knuckles. | ||
| But then he also goes to the side with it. | ||
| He's one of Hickson's black belts. | ||
| They called Hickson up the night before, apparently. | ||
| Krohn's really good at that. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Oh, is he really? | ||
| Krohn's has crazy guillotines. | ||
| But this is not exactly like a guillotine. | ||
| Well, it's a form of a guillotine. | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| It's a form of a guillotine. | ||
| It's fucking nasty, though. | ||
| What they're saying is, yeah, the knuckles are here. | ||
| You can kind of see it. | ||
| The knuckles are going deep into the neck as opposed to the regular guillotine where you're cutting off the windpipe or cutting off, rather, the blood on the sides. | ||
| Well, a Marcelotine, same thing. | ||
| High elbow guillotine. | ||
| It's a trachea smash. | ||
| I like Rothwell over Junior Dos Santos. | ||
| I keep picking against him. | ||
| I got to stop. | ||
| That trachea smash is nasty. | ||
| Those are quick taps. | ||
| If it's good or it's right, it's immediate. | ||
| You know who's got a nasty one of those? | ||
| Amal Easton. | ||
| He's got a nasty one of those. | ||
| Super nasty. | ||
| He demonstrated it on me, man. | ||
| I couldn't tap quick enough. | ||
| It's one of those... | ||
| Certain guys man like I would I don't want Uriah to strangle me But I would like to know what's going on with that because he's one of those motherfuckers and Benavidez is another one Gets a hold of your neck man. | ||
| Remember when Benavidez fought Tim Elliott and he had a tap with his feet Dude. | ||
| Some shit, son. | ||
| Benavidez has got some scoweeze. | ||
| He's got some scoweeze. | ||
| There's a lot going on with that neck. | ||
| A lot of different ways to squeeze it. | ||
| Just because you're good at one way doesn't mean you're going to be good at any other way. | ||
| You've got to spend time on each way. | ||
| People don't realize how big he is either. | ||
|
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|
I remember when I found him, I was like, you're a giant. | |
| He's a gorilla. | ||
| You're a gorilla. | ||
| He's a gorilla of gorillas. | ||
| I'm not really a gorilla. | ||
| You're a gorilla. | ||
| Just look at you, you're sitting next to Ian. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hey, buddy! | |
| Look at this! | ||
| Look at this picture of Benavidez with almost like a mount guard, which I love. | ||
| Skydiving. | ||
| That's the most nasty control. | ||
| Skydiving, I love it, Eddie. | ||
| And then on top of that, he's just fucking skumushing him. | ||
| I'm going to tap with his feet. | ||
| Yeah, both hands trapped. | ||
| Can't even say tap because he's eating some oblique. | ||
| That's humiliating. | ||
| That's not tapping your feet. | ||
| God, man. | ||
| He taps so hard with his feet, too. | ||
| It wasn't even like a... | ||
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The second you see that, the second you see that image, you're like, oh, that guy knows what he's doing. | |
| Like, as soon as you see that, you're like, no beginner gets in positions like that. | ||
| And one of the best, nicest guys of all time. | ||
| Benavidez is a motherfucker. | ||
| The salt of the earth. | ||
| He is an awesome... | ||
| Oh, is there a video that actually shows it? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Benefine is a monster, man. | ||
| His grappling is so strong. | ||
| Really underrated because you always see him moving well and punching and footwork and kicks and stuff. | ||
| You see him just being an overall fighter. | ||
| But his ground game, Elliott was a wrestler. | ||
| Elliott's a tough guy. | ||
| Yeah, good wrestler. | ||
| When he got Elliott to the ground and I saw him just immediately advancing and just clamping down, I was like, ooh, this is a high-level fucking position for him. | ||
| Love it. | ||
| But he's another guy where... | ||
| You know how badass this was? | ||
| As he mounted, he hit it. | ||
| I mean, do you know how badass that is? | ||
|
unidentified
|
You never see that in MMA. Never see that. | |
| That's just like classic shit. | ||
| You see it in class. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You see shit in class all the time, but it doesn't quite make it over to the UFC. High-level competition. | ||
| Benavidez has the Misha Tate syndrome, where if there's no Ronda, there's no DJ, he's the motherfucker. | ||
| But just that during the time they're there, you're second best. | ||
| Sucks, man. | ||
| Well, also, the second fight they had, he tried to... | ||
| Are we out of time? | ||
| What's going on, Jamie? | ||
| What happens? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| Let's keep going. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| What happens? | ||
| People stop listening. | ||
| We just keep talking. | ||
| Three hours was a big issue with YouTube or Ustream, but now we're on YouTube. | ||
| We were having problems with both feeds. | ||
| No more Ustream? | ||
| No, we've been on YouTube for a while because we were having problems with both feeds on Ustream. | ||
| And YouTube is so good, it's like it's the best way to do it because you can, in the middle of it, you can rewind it, you can pause it, you can do shit to it. | ||
| Couldn't really do that with Ustream, so we decided to just keep doing them on YouTube. | ||
| But Benavidez, like, the second fight with Mighty Mouse was like a pivotal moment because he decided to, like, try to get flat-fitted. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| He just decided, like, his benefit or his pro on his corner is the power. | ||
| He's like, I'm just gonna dig my heels in and fuck this dude up. | ||
| You peeing again? | ||
| How dare you. | ||
| How many beers have you drank over there? | ||
| Drank, drunk? | ||
| He's only three in. | ||
| He's three deep. | ||
| I could use another. | ||
| I'm not going to lie to you guys. | ||
| Are they in there? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| You want one another? | ||
| No, I'm good, man. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| You're on that crazy diet. | ||
| Yeah, I probably shouldn't even drink this one. | ||
| I only drank half of it. | ||
| Well, you drank one for the new Little Brown. | ||
| Little Brown. | ||
| You made a Little Brown, Big Brown. | ||
| He's brown as shit, dude. | ||
| He's half Mexican. | ||
| What is he? | ||
| Brown? | ||
| Big brown? | ||
| He's not black. | ||
| Kimbo had to find that out the hard way. | ||
| Kimbo thought he was black. | ||
| It's a hilarious story. | ||
| There was somebody that was saying racist shit, they thought, and that story of Kimbo thinking you're black. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| He's like, dude, I'm not black. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What are you? | |
| That's what we love about him. | ||
| What did he say? | ||
| Because that's what I love, bro. | ||
| You don't know what the fuck he is. | ||
| I love Kimbo, man. | ||
| He's one of my favorite people. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| I wish him success, man. | ||
| Me too. | ||
| I love him. | ||
| You should have him on your show, Joe. | ||
| I would love to have him on. | ||
| You would fall in love with the dude. | ||
| I love him anyway. | ||
| I met him. | ||
| Once you talk to him, you're like, damn, man. | ||
| Just a good family, dude. | ||
| And just taking advantage of it. | ||
| I understand. | ||
| But if he's going to fight on TV, he's got to be in better shape than that. | ||
| You just gotta be in a better shape than that. | ||
| At the end of the day, there's no excuse either one of them have for being in that piss-poor shape. | ||
| It's one thing if they don't have the cardio... | ||
| Where's the bottle opener? | ||
| Bottle opener up in his bitch. | ||
| Where'd he go? | ||
| Where'd he go? | ||
| You know, I think he thought he was just gonna knock Dada out, so he said, fuck it, let's go back to the Miami days. | ||
| We can't do that. | ||
| Yeah, it doesn't work anymore. | ||
| Nah, you get embarrassed. | ||
| You want another beer? | ||
| No, no, I'm good. | ||
| We're just looking for the bottle opener. | ||
| What the hell do we do with it? | ||
| How'd you open these, Eddie? | ||
| We had a bottle opener. | ||
| I swear we used it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Over here. | |
| What were we just talking about? | ||
| That'd be an epic podcast for you to have. | ||
| And Kimbo. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Look, I love Kimbo. | ||
| I think his story is awesome. | ||
| Dude, I just feel like at this point in time when you got guys like Will Brooks, when you got guys like, you know, now we just got over Benson Henderson. | ||
| You got guys like Paul Daly. | ||
| You got Michael Page. | ||
| Bad motherfucker. | ||
| You got some good talent over there. | ||
| Some real good talent. | ||
| Yeah, all the Russian guys. | ||
| Kimbo's a draw, though, man. | ||
| And he's old. | ||
| I don't... | ||
| And he's old. | ||
| Not as a headliner, folks. | ||
| You don't need that. | ||
| He wasn't a headliner, though. | ||
| He was the co-headliner. | ||
| That's a circus act. | ||
| It's a circus act. | ||
| You don't need that. | ||
| You could get away without that. | ||
| If you want to have that, have that on before you have a legit fight. | ||
| So you have that fight. | ||
| Unless there's numbers. | ||
| Unless there's these crazy numbers. | ||
| Kimball fights. | ||
| 17 million people. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I bet you their numbers were better than you. | |
| I bet you Bellator's numbers were better than this cowboy card. | ||
| Yeah, probably. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| I have nothing... | ||
| That's not a good thing, by the way. | ||
| I have no problem with Gracie Shamrock fucking 4. I have no problem with that. | ||
| I do. | ||
| I have no problem with that. | ||
| Eddie Bravo wants to get back in with the Klan. | ||
| As I'm wearing the Hoist Gracie shirt. | ||
| Yeah, he does. | ||
| You're doing anything you can. | ||
| I should be wearing that shirt. | ||
| Why'd you guys switch shirts? | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| He can't fit in that shirt, first of all. | ||
| That shit's tight on you. | ||
| Why won't you just love me, Dad? | ||
| Why won't you hire, Daddy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hire! | |
| Push me! | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm just saying, Kimbo is fun to watch if he has the right matchup. | |
| Wait a minute, you're defending Kimbo, but not Hoist? | ||
| And you're wearing a Hoist shirt? | ||
| No, I love Hoist, but Hoist is 50! | ||
| Listen, he's probably healthier than Kimbo. | ||
| I kind of like his chances versus Kimbo. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| How about we just go Hoist versus Kimbo? | ||
| What's wrong with that? | ||
| Hoist at least looks like a 50-year-old guy. | ||
| I just came up with the best fight of all time. | ||
| That's the fight. | ||
| That's the fucking fight. | ||
| He's already beat Ken Shamrock. | ||
| And we do it in Oklahoma on an Indian reservation where both of them can get their supplements. | ||
| Just juice to the gills? | ||
| That'd be sick. | ||
| Come on, fucking do it. | ||
| Why not, Bellator? | ||
| Hey, Bellator, you're welcome. | ||
| Yeah, you're welcome. | ||
| Get back in there. | ||
| Here you go. | ||
| And then Dada vs. | ||
| Ken Shamrock. | ||
| That's exactly what I was going to say. | ||
| Let me just keep the Dada show going. | ||
| I think Dada's done, son. | ||
| All Ken has to do is dance around for the first 30 seconds and Dada's out of gas. | ||
| Hey, you know how you know fighting's not for you, Professor, when you have a heart attack after the fight? | ||
| It might not be for you. | ||
| He almost died. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Straight up. | |
| Isn't that a sign of his courage, though, that he was able to push through when his cardio was completely failed? | ||
| You think courage or stupidity? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| How rude. | ||
| People will do anything for a paycheck. | ||
|
unidentified
|
My lord, you guys, tonight, I can't say shit! | |
| I said that his body was filled with mashed potatoes and fried chicken, and then you say something, and I'm like, well, you said it's racist. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| I just said how stupid he went in there. | ||
| Meatloaf, fried chicken. | ||
| I mean, you hate Dada, you hate Hoyce. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who do you like? | |
| Oh, hell no. | ||
| I love Hoyce. | ||
| I love Hoyce. | ||
| Donald Cerrone. | ||
| That's who he loves. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love Donald. | |
| And Magny. | ||
| Neil Magny. | ||
| You love him. | ||
| I'm a fan of Magny. | ||
| It's because he's awesome. | ||
| Dude, Magny has Hector next. | ||
| Neil Magny's awesome. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love him. | |
| Okay, let's be real about that. | ||
| Hector's 37, 38. He's coming off of a suspension for quite a long time for steroids, right? | ||
| How long is the suspension? | ||
| I think it was a long time. | ||
| It's been a while. | ||
| It's more than a year. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| So, what do you think about that fight? | ||
| When they first told me that Neil was fighting, I told him, I said, I don't like it, because Neil doesn't use his range. | ||
| Jesus Christ, look at this fucking... | ||
| Who's that? | ||
| Who's that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| I don't know. | ||
| That was on Fight Pass, I guess. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| What a bloody war these two chicks had. | ||
| On Twitter, they said this was Fight of the Night, I heard. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Oh, look at that guy. | ||
| That guy had some kung fu. | ||
| Did you see that? | ||
| That is the thickest torso I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| Wow, that guy looks good. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| He's African. | ||
| Who is that dude? | ||
| Bam Goosey. | ||
| God damn. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That guy looks good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Bam Goosey. | ||
| Damn, people are just getting fucked up tonight. | ||
| Stinky leg. | ||
| Who is that? | ||
| White boy got hands. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
| For fuck's sake. | ||
| Sean Strickland. | ||
| Oh, he knocked down Alex Garcia? | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| I like Alex Garcia. | ||
| Alex Garcia is a tank. | ||
| And he kissed the ground. | ||
| Who's going to get stabbed from kissing the ground? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Yeah, he is. | ||
| He's got a staff on your lips, son. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Merce on that bottom lip. | ||
| Chris Camosi, performance of the night. | ||
| That's so weird to me. | ||
| I feel like I'm watching some fucking Hunger Games shit. | ||
| Performance bonus. | ||
| 50 grand. | ||
| Fatality. | ||
| Extra money. | ||
| Finish him. | ||
| For maiming. | ||
| Career ender. | ||
| Plus 500. Do you know why they call it performance of the night and not submission of the night anymore? | ||
| Yeah, because sometimes they have no submissions. | ||
| And sometimes it sounds too violent. | ||
| Knockout of the night sounds like it's promoting violence. | ||
| Oh, who said that? | ||
| I can't say. | ||
| Did you just make that up, Eddie? | ||
| No, no, no, I can't say. | ||
| Is this a conspiracy? | ||
| No, that's true. | ||
| They were saying it sounded like it's promoting the most violent knockout, so let's just call it performance. | ||
| Well, they definitely tend to shy away from blood on these shows. | ||
| Oh, on Fox, yes. | ||
| I was kind of shocked that they showed that one in the replay, with those two gals. | ||
| Is that sexist? | ||
| Gals? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is there any truth to Fox trying to acquire a UFC? Why the fuck can't you say gals? | |
| I've been scared to ask. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Rumors. | |
| Not to say bitches. | ||
| I've been scared to ask. | ||
| You say those bitches can fight? | ||
| If the Fertittas leave, though, and Dana leaves, look, this thing... | ||
| The ship is sinking. | ||
| This thing is not entirely, like... | ||
| Oh, there's Ashley. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who's that? | |
| It's not permanent. | ||
| My friend Ashley. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Ashley Evans-Smith. | ||
| Jesus Christ, she looks awesome. | ||
| No, that's the girl getting... | ||
| No, your friend's the one that was getting her ass kicked. | ||
| Yeah, she got her ass kicked. | ||
| Damn, Ashley Smith got whooped by that girl like that? | ||
| What's this girl's name? | ||
| Split decision. | ||
| Renaud. | ||
| Oh, Marion Renaud? | ||
| Is that Marion Renaud? | ||
| What happened there? | ||
| Why are they showing that? | ||
| There's a serious controversy going on. | ||
| What happened there? | ||
| 29-28, Renault for me. | ||
| They're just talking about the decision. | ||
| I guess it was a decision. | ||
| And who won? | ||
| 29-28, Renault. | ||
| Sounds like the other girl won. | ||
| It sounds like Ashley Smith won? | ||
| I mean, they're showing score gone. | ||
| Something really happened. | ||
| One judge scored a 30-27. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| We don't know. | ||
| How can we comment on a fight we didn't even watch? | ||
| I love it. | ||
| That's why we do these things. | ||
| How much one click? | ||
| Let's get to the bottom of that. | ||
| Let's see what happened there. | ||
| Get to the bottom. | ||
| More Connors, son. | ||
| They want to go right to the money generator. | ||
| This is the money generator. | ||
| Oh, Ashley Evans-Smith won. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| So they're saying it's a bad decision or something. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Oh, that's what it is. | ||
| I like Ashley. | ||
| I've known her for a long time. | ||
| She's a nice girl. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| She's a girl that beat Fallon Fox. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Correct. | |
| She's the one girl that beat that transgender MMA fighter that used to be a dude. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| And she's BFF with Carla. | ||
| Is she? | ||
| Oh, that's cool. | ||
| I gotta fucking deal with all of them because now, you know, Carla's at my gym. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| How's she doing? | ||
| She's doing good. | ||
| When is she getting back in there? | ||
| I don't know yet. | ||
| I mean, she's trained hard down though. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| She decided to take some time off and like really work on her game? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Her striking? | ||
| And just, yeah, just revamp everything, get her head straight, and you know, she got her fucking ass kicked. | ||
| Well, she fought a murderer. | ||
| A little Polish murderer. | ||
| And she went into it mentally flat. | ||
| I mean, I'm there every day with her, so I saw weeks in advance, I was like, oh, she's fucked. | ||
| Do you think she was flat because of the pressure, or do you think she was flat because of overtraining? | ||
| Or do you think Johanna's a fucking murderer? | ||
| It's a mixture of all of it. | ||
| You get in with a murder. | ||
| More Johanna, though. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay, so we're sitting backstage, and we can hear Johanna warming up, looking right next door. | ||
| Smack! | ||
| And Carlos's sitting there going, and I just looked at her, and I was like, fuck. | ||
| Come here. | ||
| Let's start. | ||
| Let's warm up. | ||
| Let's warm up. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Ioana was just fucking screaming in there the whole time. | ||
| For like two hours. | ||
| I think she's doing it there to fuck with these heads. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That makes me love her more. | ||
| That makes me love her more. | ||
| She's probably not even hitting pads. | ||
| She probably has someone smacking things and she's just yelling. | ||
| It's on a ghetto box. | ||
| It's on a ghetto box. | ||
| It was fucking scary, you know? | ||
| It was fucking... | ||
| It's an MP3. Like, my grandpa sat back in the World War, whatever war he was in, sitting, the Japanese were hitting the trees with swords, and middle of the night, all night long, whack, whack, whack, and just screaming in the jungle. | ||
| Trying to keep you awake? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I think everyone when they saw Ioana just fucking murk girls was like, I'm gonna take some time off and work on my stand-up. | ||
| Yeah, the Juliana Pena fight was the worst. | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| Not Juliana Pena, Jessica Pena. | ||
| Jessica Pena. | ||
| And that's another girl I've known for a long time. | ||
| Dude, she murked her. | ||
| She gave her a nose job full free. | ||
| She smashed her whole face in. | ||
| Smashed her face. | ||
| She's so scary with her striking, man. | ||
| She's a motherfucker. | ||
| But she breaks her hands all the time. | ||
| She's got Uncle Creepy disease. | ||
| And still wins. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, she guts it out, yeah. | ||
| She's fucking... | ||
| It got to the point where she was fucking with Carla, and then with all the noise, I walked out to that fight fucking staring at her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Like, fuck you. | ||
| Don't get head kicked, son. | ||
| Oh, yeah, I'm looking at her, because, you know, my basic little sister is about to fight you, and then she's fucking... | ||
| If you loved her, why'd you let her fight her? | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you really loved her, and you see Johanna... | |
| You know what it's like? | ||
| It's like kickbox her. | ||
| You pull her aside and go listen. | ||
| It's like kickbox your Van Damme. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't do it. | |
| Let's go fishing. | ||
| Let's get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Get on one of them Wonderland cruises and go see the killer whales in Alaska. | ||
| Let's just get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Let's get the fuck out of here. | ||
| We don't need to be doing this, baby. | ||
| Because she didn't take me on shit. | ||
| She takes her best friends. | ||
| Oh, you let her. | ||
| I had the sibling rivalry, maybe. | ||
| You better get marked. | ||
| No, that was fucking... | ||
| That broke my heart. | ||
| Well, she's the champ. | ||
| She had to defend her title. | ||
| There's no way around it. | ||
| You know, unless she vacates the title and says, look, I'm going to take some time off. | ||
| You know who did that in Glory? | ||
| Valtellini. | ||
| He had a concussion. | ||
| He said, I'm going to vacate the title. | ||
| I'm going to walk away. | ||
| I'm going to, you know, rest my fucking brain up. | ||
| Dude, good luck beating Carla. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that division is just... | ||
| How about Claudia Gedalia? | ||
| There's a good argument that Claudia Gedalia won the first fight with Juana. | ||
| I thought she did. | ||
| A lot of people did. | ||
| It was close. | ||
| It's very close. | ||
| I bet you this next one isn't. | ||
| You think so? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep, you guys can call me a hater, glass half empty. | |
| I just think Johanna's gonna fuck her world up. | ||
| I feel the same way. | ||
| Okay, well... | ||
| It's a different... | ||
| She could, or we could see... | ||
| I mean, we don't know until they get after her, because... | ||
| I'm just saying, with my educated opinion, what I think. | ||
| Yeah, I agree, she looked great. | ||
| Clotch is a beast, man. | ||
| Super beast. | ||
| Nasty ground game, too. | ||
| She looks like a little Thiago Alves. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| The last girl that fought Ioana is Valerie, right? | ||
| When she took her down, I was like, oh, your ground kind of sucks. | ||
| Well, Valerie is tough as fuck, dude. | ||
| She's tough as fuck. | ||
| She always looks the same after every fight. | ||
| She's like, oh, fucked up, swollen eye. | ||
| But that girl's tough. | ||
| They say Ioana gets in their NAMP stand and goes with the dudes. | ||
| Just does work. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Good luck meeting that. | ||
| She's tiny. | ||
| She's got a stylist too. | ||
| They're like, hey, those white polos? | ||
| Uh-uh. | ||
| Let's mix this up. | ||
| That's her style, bro. | ||
| No, she makes it up. | ||
| Oh, she's a new stylist? | ||
| Yeah, she got a little money and she's like, fuck this. | ||
| Ah, interesting. | ||
| Stepped her game up. | ||
| Got some of those Kanye shoes? | ||
| Nah, she's not that famous. | ||
| What the fuck was the Kanye shit? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I still don't know. | |
| Oh, me and Jamie stayed up all night. | ||
| We pulled an all-nighter and we didn't get him. | ||
| You know, there's a really big fight at 170. What is he saying here? | ||
| I'd like to hear this. | ||
| He's saying all kinds of crazy shit. | ||
| He's just mind-fucking him. | ||
| Can we hear this? | ||
| Yeah, turn it up. | ||
| Can we rewind it just a bit? | ||
| You can't rewind it? | ||
| Why can't we rewind it? | ||
| It's just a montage of his shit-talking. | ||
| Isn't this DirecTV? | ||
| We could rewind it. | ||
| What, do we cave people? | ||
| You know, like, you see people sitting there watching a commercial, like, you know, you don't have to do this. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's pause this bitch and go get something to eat. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| What the fuck are we doing? | ||
| Fucking hate commercials. | ||
| Crank it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Now, what does Mystic Mac have to say about 2016? | |
| 2016, well, the end of 2015 means the end of the Federalweight Division. | ||
| They are all dead in the water. | ||
| It's done. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But I have my eye on that 155 Division, and I see them all stuck in the moat in there. | |
| The division will be killed, like I predicted. | ||
| And then it's on to the 155 stuck in the moat division. | ||
| This motherfucker. | ||
| Goddamn. | ||
| Oh shit. | ||
| And nothing's ever the same. | ||
| He's always different. | ||
| Religious people are going crazy. | ||
| They're crazy mad at him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I keep trying to go to the place that, or the guy that makes his suits, I work out with him, but it's a little too expensive. | ||
| David August? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, he makes his suits for the UFC. Yeah. | ||
| All those monkey suits that you see me wearing now. | ||
| They're all David August? | ||
| He makes fucking great suits, man. | ||
| Oh, they fit great. | ||
| And I don't have to bring clothes. | ||
| That's what I like. | ||
| I can dress normal. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I just show up and change now. | ||
| You have it in your locker room now? | ||
| Yeah, I used to have to bring my own clothes. | ||
| That's why I always wore the same exact shit. | ||
| Black shirt, jeans, black shoes, that's it. | ||
| That's all I wore. | ||
| Have you ever seen all the chain dragging that I do? | ||
| I'll put like one of those anchor harnesses on and put 100 or 200 pounds of chains and drag it for like a mile. | ||
| Give me a suit or five. | ||
| That all fits my little short troll body perfectly. | ||
| See, it's hard to find suits. | ||
| Luckily I used to work in the fashion industry, so I know what the fuck I'm buying. | ||
| Imagine being Yoel Romero. | ||
| Oh God. | ||
| He should. | ||
| Try to find a suit for one of those guys, or Dan Bobish. | ||
| Remember him? | ||
| Round and bald. | ||
| Yeah, remember Dan Bobish? | ||
| I'm built like a fucking brick shithouse, man. | ||
| That guy was gigantic. | ||
| Suits aren't for everyone. | ||
| They're not for you, are they? | ||
| Oh, I love a suit. | ||
| A suit? | ||
| Tell us. | ||
| I love a suit. | ||
| How many suits you got? | ||
| A couple, for sure. | ||
| You gonna buy yourself a suit when your kid turns one? | ||
| Probably. | ||
| Or another watch. | ||
| Or another push. | ||
| We should get matching suits. | ||
| I had to have like three or four suits when I commented for King of the Cage and Pride. | ||
| I wore the suits. | ||
| There's Bobish. | ||
| Oh, jeez. | ||
| King of the Cage. | ||
| I forgot about that guy. | ||
| Remember when Mark Kerr submitted him with a chin in the eyeball? | ||
| Good God, yes I do. | ||
| Mounted him, shoved his chin in his eyeball and forced it in there until he tapped. | ||
| That shit was nasty. | ||
| I remember that fight. | ||
| Look at those boys. | ||
| He fought Mark Kerr the fucking Smashing Machine. | ||
| That's back when Mark was the specimen before he even became the Smashing Machine. | ||
| He was the specimen first. | ||
| He might have one of the best bodies in MMA. The Brazilians called him the Smashing Machine when he went to Brazil and he went to Brazil before the UFC. Well, who called him a specimen then? | ||
| I thought that was his. | ||
| Dude, look at Mark Kerr in that picture. | ||
| White people call him that. | ||
| But the Brazilians call him a smashing machine. | ||
| The Brazilians call him a smashing machine. | ||
| Best white man body. | ||
| Look at that fucking neck. | ||
| Good lord. | ||
| First of all, is he totally white? | ||
| Because I would say no. | ||
| I think so. | ||
| First team all body right now. | ||
| He's got my pick. | ||
| He had definitely the roundest ass of all time. | ||
| Is that real? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When he was at his best, he was fucking terrifying. | ||
| But the thing is, no one can sustain that level of juice for more than a few years. | ||
| And other intravenous drugs. | ||
| Is that Butterbean right there? | ||
| That's Bobish. | ||
| Yeah, that's Butterbean. | ||
| The Smashing Machine. | ||
| It's best body and worst body ever in MMA. The Smashing Machine was a crazy documentary. | ||
| If you haven't seen it, folks, pause this podcast. | ||
| I've never seen it. | ||
| You've never seen The Smashing Machine? | ||
| And I love me some docs. | ||
| They caught it so good. | ||
| That's a crazy doc, dude. | ||
| They caught him right when he was falling apart. | ||
| They went to him to film a documentary when Kerr was on top of the world, smashing people. | ||
| And what they found is a guy who was just about to lose it. | ||
| Like, right when they came along and started filming it, and he didn't give a fuck. | ||
| He was, like, shooting up in front of them. | ||
| He was doing drugs in front of them. | ||
| Wasn't he gay, too? | ||
| Not that it matters, but wasn't he gay? | ||
| That's never been shown. | ||
| I don't know if that's true or not true. | ||
| He had a weird relationship with some woman, and then... | ||
| Yeah, he was shooting up, like... | ||
| Actual painkillers, like pharmaceuticals. | ||
| Goddamn. | ||
| Dude, it was hardcore. | ||
| Where can I find it, Doc? | ||
| Is it on Netflix? | ||
| Everywhere. | ||
| It's on everything. | ||
| Smashing Machines on everything. | ||
| It's probably on iTunes, too. | ||
| It's really good. | ||
| How do you think this guy like Woodley feels? | ||
| Like, sit on the outside, knowing that they want Wonderboy to fight for the title, and knowing the reality is, if he doesn't secure that fight with Robbie Law or before UFC 200, and Conor knocks out Dos Anjos. | ||
| He's fucked. | ||
| You're in third place. | ||
| He's in third place right now. | ||
| He's in third place. | ||
| And he deserves it. | ||
| Well, he's in second place. | ||
| Because, like, public-wise, he's not in first place, but, like, the UFC does own one, right? | ||
| So they think he's going to fight for the title next. | ||
| If he does fight for the title next, that's all well and good unless Conor smashes Dos Anjos. | ||
| Then all bets are off. | ||
| Everything's off. | ||
| Who would you put your money on, Conor or Tyrone? | ||
| That would be crazy, right? | ||
| What could Conor do to that guy? | ||
| Punch him in the face. | ||
| You think somebody's so fast that it would be so hard to hit? | ||
| Yeah, well, Tyron is a beast, and he's really good at closing the distance. | ||
| He's always had cardio issues. | ||
| He might be able to take Conor down at will, maybe. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| But for how long? | ||
| At 170? | ||
| For five rounds, though. | ||
| He'd take him down at will, right? | ||
| He could hit an outside double. | ||
| Or even if he grabbed that really wide leg... | ||
| You know, it's just getting in there because Conor is so fast and moves so fluidly. | ||
| But if he got a hold of him, he would throw him on his head and hold him there for a long time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Damn, Holly Holm and Misha Tate's coming up. | ||
| That's an interesting fight, huh? | ||
| Very interesting. | ||
| Misha Tate turns out into a dogfight. | ||
| She's not going to charge forward like Ronda did. | ||
| She's too smart. | ||
| Yeah, she's going to turn into a totally different kind of fight. | ||
| Misha hasn't fought forever. | ||
| Kat Zingano. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| She had a hard time. | ||
| Before the Ronda fight, that crazy war that she had with... | ||
| She knocked out Misha before that. | ||
| No. | ||
| No, she knocked out Misha, then she hurt her knee, and then she had that Amanda Nunes fight. | ||
| The Amanda Nunes fight was chaos in the first round. | ||
| She got hurt bad in the first round. | ||
| Really bad. | ||
| And after that fight, she took a long time to recover. | ||
| Like, she had a bunch of issues. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, mental issues after that fight. | ||
| Her husband was getting suicide. | ||
| Well, not just that. | ||
| That was, for sure, a huge thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But, I mean, physical mental... | ||
| From head trauma. | ||
| From getting rattled. | ||
| You know, she had to take some time off. | ||
| She's taking a lot of time off. | ||
| She had fun of... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Well, she fought Ronda and jumped at her and got caught. | ||
| 16-second fight. | ||
| And did she fight after that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Since then? | ||
| No. | ||
| Not that I know of. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| But, I mean, she's so good, but... | ||
| You're going to fight it often enough. | ||
| What are they doing showing us racing cars? | ||
| Don't ever show me that in my face again. | ||
| Stop. | ||
| How dare you, Fox Sports. | ||
| What are you doing? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Teledega. | |
| Is this still the UFC on Fox? | ||
| Not ended. | ||
| They only do it for the first half an hour. | ||
| Then they go to regular sports. | ||
| This is a crazy fucking thing to do with your life. | ||
| Have you ever tried riding one of those cars? | ||
| Have you ever been in a NASCAR? I haven't. | ||
| And I don't give a fuck. | ||
| Anything with horsepower is fun. | ||
| Is that 300? | ||
| Yeah, it's 300. Damn, he's still going off that, huh? | ||
| Yeah, that's all he's got. | ||
|
unidentified
|
FREEDOM! We got a new movie coming out that looks just like Spartan. | |
| Gods of Egypt or something like that? | ||
| When everybody found out his body wasn't really like it was in that show, we were like, hey. | ||
| You robbed us. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Those abs were CGI. Yeah, CGI abs. | |
| We thought you were yoked, yo. | ||
| Yeah, he ain't shit. | ||
| These cars must be so fun to drive. | ||
| Yeah, I bet they're really fun. | ||
| Oh my god, could you imagine? | ||
| I can't get in a NASCAR though. | ||
| They go around the track 500 times, it just does nothing for me. | ||
| Have you ever been to an event? | ||
| No. | ||
| Let me guess, cars like this? | ||
| Fuck the cars. | ||
| You just walk around infield or walk around. | ||
| My family's always owned a Toyota dealership forever. | ||
| They used to. | ||
| So we would always get tickets to races and stuff. | ||
| It's just entertaining as fuck. | ||
| You've got 100,000 people show up to... | ||
| Dude, people love it and they're diehard fans so I'm missing something. | ||
| Formula One is the shit. | ||
| Oh, that's the best shit on the planet. | ||
| That's wild to watch. | ||
| Or MotoGP. | ||
| You ever watch MotoGP? | ||
| Formula One's badass. | ||
| You want to see a good documentary? | ||
| Watch the documentary on Ayrton Senna. | ||
| It's called Senna. | ||
| Oh my god, it's amazing. | ||
| He's a Brazilian Formula One driver in like the heyday. | ||
| He was a bad motherfucker, just a wild, crazy, reckless dude. | ||
| He took some mad chances, man. | ||
| It is a great fucking... | ||
| I like it already. | ||
| You ever see it, Jamie? | ||
| Hey, how about that, speaking of... | ||
| What are you laughing at, Jamie? | ||
| Remember that one sketch that the Asian NASCAR driver who started hiring or promoting Asian NASCAR drivers because they would wreck. | ||
| You know, people really want to watch wrecks. | ||
| So they'd be like a famous Asian guy that they know they're going to get epic wrecks. | ||
| Look what happens when you fucking lose control of your car. | ||
| Jesus Christ, man. | ||
| Damn, for sure put on the brakes. | ||
| We can't. | ||
| Well, that's Danica Patrick. | ||
| Oh, it's a chick. | ||
| Of course that's what happens. | ||
| Well, watch that again. | ||
| Watch what she did. | ||
| Watch where her car goes flying through the air, man. | ||
| Dude, they make bank. | ||
| Before that, though, before when she gets clipped, it just gives you an idea of how fast they're going. | ||
| Look, he catches the corner, and look at her car's airborne sideways, son. | ||
| I like when they yell at each other. | ||
| Heading towards the concrete, man, and she pulled it out. | ||
| Dude, she recovered. | ||
| What a recovery. | ||
| Finish dead last. | ||
| How often do they practice maneuvering out of bad spots like that? | ||
| I mean, that's gotta be part of their training, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Shouldn't that be part of their training? | ||
| I'm sure it is. | ||
| Oh, I'm sure. | ||
| It saved their fucking life. | ||
| Well, they have to learn how to turn things so you don't hit things head-on. | ||
| In that sense, she recovered perfectly. | ||
| But when you're flying through the air sideways like that, you really can't control it. | ||
| When that happens, if you're too close to a wall, you're gonna hit. | ||
| You can downshift out of it, you can pull your e-brake, you can gasp, whatever you're trying to do. | ||
| She was in the air sideways. | ||
| Damn, look how close that was, though. | ||
| I'm just saying that because I slid out in the rain in my old built Subaru. | ||
| Well, that's the same thing. | ||
| And slid out and just fucking... | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know, you fucking head towards something. | |
| You can't do anything. | ||
| She's going 100 miles an hour faster, or 150 miles an hour faster. | ||
| I grew up driving in snow. | ||
| Look at Chevrolet on the bottom, Toyota on the top, Chevrolet on the bottom. | ||
| What does that tell you? | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| Ford right there in the middle. | ||
| Chevy wins. | ||
| Dude, Toyota is the shit. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Depends what era we're in here. | ||
| Daytona and Toyota's winning? | ||
| How... | ||
| Isn't... | ||
| What? | ||
| It is kind of crazy. | ||
| It's bullshit. | ||
| Hey, Japan won best whiskey in the world last year. | ||
| And also, apparently, best fucking NASCAR. But they're not Asian drivers. | ||
| Well, Japan has one of the most incredible cars ever built right now. | ||
| The Nissan GT-R. That's a motherfucker. | ||
| They have the new one that's out now. | ||
| Godzilla. | ||
| Well, they have the new one, the Nismo Nissan GT-R. It's 600 horsepower. | ||
| They're having issues, though, with it. | ||
| What issues? | ||
| It's too fast? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| No, with the old ones, with the launch button. | ||
| How fast? | ||
| Oh, the old ones, yeah. | ||
| The first generation, right? | ||
| The first generation, there was just too much power there to beef up the transmission. | ||
| Launch control would blow the training out if they did it more than a couple of times. | ||
| But the new ones, the Nismo one, they say that you're taking turns like defy physics. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because it's all-wheel drive. | ||
| It's insanely balanced. | ||
| It's 600 horsepower. | ||
| I love them. | ||
| Massive downforce on this huge wing. | ||
| And you know what's way faster than that? | ||
| The new Viper ACR. Viper just went all the way. | ||
| Have you seen that thing? | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| I watched five videos on it yesterday. | ||
| I watched five different videos where they were driving around. | ||
| Jamie, pull that up. | ||
| You want to see the most gangster car? | ||
| I want to buy an old Viper. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| Stop that! | ||
| Get the new one. | ||
| Listen, the new one is broken every single track record. | ||
| Every single track they've raced this thing on for time, it's broken the record on. | ||
| Do you understand how insane that is? | ||
| When does that stop? | ||
| When does it go 0 to 60 in one second? | ||
| When does that happen? | ||
| Well, there's 0 to 60. This is just over two. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at this fucking car! | |
| Everywhere it goes, it should be the fucking Team America song. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| It's faster than a motorcycle. | ||
| Just swallowing people. | ||
| The handling on this thing is fucking bananas. | ||
| It's more than 600 horsepower. | ||
| I think it's like 650 horsepower. | ||
| That was always the issue, right? | ||
| The handling. | ||
| Yeah, the handling is off the charts and it has the most downforce of any production car. | ||
| Look at that hood. | ||
| Look at the louvers and the hood and the vents. | ||
| And for what it is, they're usually not that expensive for the supercar. | ||
| It makes my dick hard. | ||
| And if you watch the videos on it, it seems just glorious. | ||
| God, they look fucking sweet. | ||
| The guys are driving these things around. | ||
| I don't like that giant fan on the back. | ||
| That's the only thing that keeps you on the road, bro. | ||
| Yeah, I'm going to have to get rid of it, though. | ||
|
unidentified
|
LAUGHTER He's all style. | |
| I go for looks. | ||
| I love the wing. | ||
| That thing is so fast. | ||
| Just put your groceries in it and push it around. | ||
| Ah, fuck that. | ||
| They say it's the fastest American race car ever for sure that you could just go to a store and buy, and the only cars that beat it cost over a million dollars. | ||
| Like McLaren, Bugatti or something? | ||
| Yeah, the Spyder 918. Oh, I love that car. | ||
| That's the prettiest car ever. | ||
| That's a monster car. | ||
| But this thing is like hot on its heels, and it costs $160,000. | ||
| We're talking about something that loses track time by like a tenth of a second. | ||
| That logo is pretty awesome, too. | ||
| Look at that! | ||
| Look at that fucking thing! | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That is the coolest looking car. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| That appeals so strong to the 14-year-old boy in me. | ||
| Me too, man. | ||
| It's like seeing a hot chick. | ||
| Can you get it without the stripes? | ||
| No! | ||
| Stripes. | ||
| Take the stripes. | ||
| How dare you. | ||
| Be a man. | ||
| Fuck a stripe. | ||
| That color's sick. | ||
| I feel like I want to get rid of my Porsche and get one of those. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hey, hey. | |
| Laguna Seca Blue. | ||
| Don't get rid of your Porsche. | ||
| Hey, Scrooge. | ||
| Let's just get both. | ||
| I like the way you think. | ||
| I like the way you think. | ||
| I gotta get a warehouse. | ||
| I've got to build more wells in Africa first so I don't feel bad about it. | ||
| We'll just donate to Justin Dead and then we'll get this car. | ||
| I'm calling him tomorrow. | ||
| I was going to call him anyway. | ||
| I've got to throw some more money in there. | ||
| I throw money in there every year. | ||
| He's trying to hype this. | ||
| You want to help him? | ||
| We've got to hype this Kimbo fight for him. | ||
| Yeah, well, I'll definitely do that. | ||
| But I think I would like to just get a bunch of people to do it. | ||
| Oh, is this the new Raptor? | ||
| The new Raptor's badass. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Goddammit. | |
| This is the new one? | ||
| Ooh, this is the all aluminum one. | ||
| People get mad when we talk about cars. | ||
| Do you know that? | ||
| Really? | ||
| People get mad. | ||
| Yeah, they go, you got fucking money? | ||
| You want to talk some shit, bro? | ||
| The guy got mad because I was saying that a Mustang is a great bargain at $35,000. | ||
| And he's like, dude, $35,000 is not fucking cheap. | ||
| A lot of us out here in the real world are real jobs. | ||
| God damn it. | ||
| The new GT? Well, whatever you do, sir, don't ever watch those Motor Trend videos because they'll bum you out every week. | ||
| Because I can't afford most of those cars, so you definitely can't afford those cars either if you're complaining about a $35,000 Mustang. | ||
| And I get it. | ||
| You know, if you only make like $50,000 a year, that's a lot of money. | ||
| But you got to look at what a Mustang is. | ||
| Like, realistically, don't put yourself into it and how much money people make. | ||
| You look at a Mustang for $35,000, that is a fucking... | ||
| Steel, the new GT. In the grand scheme of things, like on the price scale of Mustangs. | ||
| And the new ones actually look good. | ||
| This is the first generation of Mustangs I've been finally, since, you know, I grew up with my dad having a 64 and a half or 65 convertible with a Boss 302 put in there. | ||
| You know, fucking car people. | ||
| And Mustangs were so ugly until now. | ||
| They were pretty. | ||
| Since the 60s. | ||
| They were pretty goofy looking until like the most recent Shelby GT500. I'm in love with the new one. | ||
| Those are pretty sweet, but the new ones are off the charts cool looking. | ||
| Off the charts. | ||
| They're so good. | ||
| Fuck all that noise. | ||
| I'm trying to get that Viper. | ||
| That Viper's a monster. | ||
| Viper's a monster. | ||
| But you can't put a baby seat in the Viper. | ||
| You can't put a baby seat in my Porsche. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's why my girl's SUV. You let me do my thing, man. | |
| You let me fly. | ||
| Yeah, and there's no AC, no radio. | ||
| There's the Nismo. | ||
| Look at that thing. | ||
| Look at this fucking rocket ship, man. | ||
| That thing looks like a turd with eyes compared to that Viper. | ||
| I think it's so ugly. | ||
| Oh, it definitely doesn't look as good. | ||
| That Viper shits on everything we've seen so much. | ||
| It looks cool from the side, though. | ||
| From the side, it looks cool. | ||
| What the GT-R looks like is a spaceship. | ||
| What the Viper looks like is sex. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| Looks like hot tits. | ||
| It looks like a girl with a 13-inch waist and tits as big as the sun. | ||
| I want to drive that. | ||
| It makes you want to drive it, doesn't it? | ||
| That's why you want to drive it. | ||
| A big, ridiculous, bulbous ass that did no shorts in the world. | ||
| Clown tits. | ||
| Meanwhile, the GTR is fucking Foxy Betty, but just fast as fuck. | ||
| Who said that? | ||
| Forget about camel toe. | ||
| Forget about moose knuckle. | ||
| The GTR is a little Japanese girl. | ||
| We're talking about elephant armpit. | ||
| That's what her pussy looks like. | ||
| Her pussy, the way her Daisy Dukes are wedged up in her vagina, it's elephant armpit. | ||
| That's what the viper is. | ||
| Do moose knuckles generally... | ||
| Is that a turn-on for guys when they see a moose knuckle? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| You know the pussy's definitely there. | ||
| I assume it's a joke. | ||
| It must have been a joke, but on Instagram or something, I saw, like, there's a thing that you could... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fake moose knuckle? | |
| Like, it's a fake moose knuckle. | ||
| I've seen fake nipples before. | ||
| I'm sure that's fake, but why is that fake? | ||
| Why is that a joke? | ||
| Well, because people try anything to get an edge. | ||
| They'll try... | ||
| Dudes will load up their pants with a sock. | ||
| I mean, that's happening. | ||
| You can't be my friend if you do that. | ||
| If you put a sock in your pants? | ||
| Yeah, you can't do that, man. | ||
| I'll be right back. | ||
| What about fake moose knuckles? | ||
| Well, girls do fake wedgies. | ||
| You know that? | ||
| Fake asses for sure. | ||
| There's wedgie genes now. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Yeah, so they ride up in that asshole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| So it looks like your ass is better. | ||
| Imagine smelling the crack of those things after a long day in Mexican food. | ||
| It's tough. | ||
| And Chipotle. | ||
| It's tough. | ||
| Yeah, there's wedgie jeans. | ||
| Why do you want to shove jeans in an asshole? | ||
| Guys or girls? | ||
| Don't press up. | ||
| There they are, wedgie jeans. | ||
| Look at that ass. | ||
| Oh, I see. | ||
| That makes asses look disgusting. | ||
| It makes your ass look a bit better. | ||
| No, it highlights the ass. | ||
| It makes your ass look like shit. | ||
| That looks like shit. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| Eddie. | ||
| Well, those are flat asses. | ||
| You're so negative tonight. | ||
| That looks like shit. | ||
| No offense. | ||
| Eddie, you're so negative tonight. | ||
| Better ass than those pants. | ||
| The girls are pulling up their jeans nowadays. | ||
| They've been doing that for like two years now. | ||
| I'm not used to it yet. | ||
| You don't like the high waist pants? | ||
| I like the low cut. | ||
| I'm still with the low cut. | ||
| You're pulling jeans up your ass and you're fucking up... | ||
| I don't know, dude. | ||
| Don't get angry, Eddie. | ||
| They're just pants? | ||
| Either way, they're going to end up on the floor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Either way, they're going to end up on the floor. | |
| It's fine. | ||
| Bro, chill. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a good point. | |
| That's a good point. | ||
| Nothing beats yoga pants still, though. | ||
| Just chill, bro. | ||
| Who decides on these fucking trends? | ||
| Let's pull up our fucking pants apart. | ||
| Who cares? | ||
| Any girl that wears anything other than yoga pants is an asshole. | ||
| Yeah, fuck that's a good point. | ||
| You know that you can wear them everywhere. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| We'll take it. | ||
| We'll accept it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| How dare you? | ||
| Please just continue to wear those everywhere. | ||
| We'll wear them to the theater. | ||
| We'll call them leggings. | ||
| We're going to call them leggings. | ||
| Just pretend you do yoga. | ||
| Just say you do yoga until you took a couple classes. | ||
| Oh, it's just like working out. | ||
| I like to keep myself. | ||
| It's a form of meditation. | ||
| You have your daytime workout gear and then you have your nighttime workout gear. | ||
| That's what girls do now. | ||
| I like to be like sleek and move through the air easy. | ||
| Aerodynamic. | ||
| Yeah, it's amazing it took so long to figure out yoga pants. | ||
| La la lulu pants. | ||
| Whatever, whatever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whatever they are, keep going. | |
| Keep going with that shit. | ||
| La la lulu pants. | ||
| How funny is that shit? | ||
| Those are huge. | ||
| Damn, they're making a fucking killing with that fucking... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, they know how to make them, man. | |
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| They know how to jam those bitches in. | ||
| They look good. | ||
| They straighten out all the cellulite and shit. | ||
| You can't even see none of that. | ||
| They're packing in tight. | ||
| And if the cloth is just thick enough... | ||
| It can hide a lot of flaws. | ||
| They hate to be a downer here, but they'll honeydick you, because it's like sausage, it's packaged. | ||
| You release that shit? | ||
| No, no, you're right, you're right. | ||
| They get sloppy. | ||
| You're right, you're right. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| They need to make La La Lulu's work with holes in them. | ||
| With holes in them, so you have to take them out? | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| There's a little Velcro, you just go like that, bam, you don't ever have to take them off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Lululemon. | |
| Yeah, there's something about those fucking yoga pants, man. | ||
| It's amazing how dumb they were in the 60s and the 70s. | ||
| They never figured out any of this shit. | ||
| Until the Dukes of Hazzard came along, they never even figured out cut-off jeans. | ||
| Daisy, what was her name? | ||
| Who the fuck would have cut their jeans off? | ||
| As soon as they figured out that, oh, you could basically just have your vagina a slight tug away. | ||
| Because all you have to do if you want to fuck a girl who's wearing Daisy Dukes, she bends over and you go like this. | ||
| Those jeans are pretty tight. | ||
| Here's the move. | ||
| It's not that easy. | ||
| Here's the move. | ||
| The jeans, maybe with underwear, yes. | ||
| But with the jeans, that's hard. | ||
| You unbutton that button, one button, and you push that bitch over the side. | ||
| See, but then... | ||
| It's science, Eddie. | ||
| The dirty ones. | ||
| Eddie, but she's hurt. | ||
| You see, Daisy Duke had the right thing. | ||
| See, the girls today, they wear Daisy Dukes, but they're so tight you can't even get them off. | ||
| Daisy Dukes were not that tight. | ||
| They were falling off. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| See, see, see, see? | ||
| Dog, dog. | ||
| Look at her. | ||
| Told you. | ||
| Those things are kind of loose. | ||
| One pop of that brass button, and that cooter's flying into the breeze. | ||
| It's ready for action. | ||
| Did you see Jessica Simpson in the remake? | ||
| She has something to say, too. | ||
| She don't have no ass. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| Eddie, you're so negative. | ||
| Oh, she does! | ||
| That's a cartoon! | ||
| That's a cartoon! | ||
| That's her ass! | ||
| That's Jessica Simpson. | ||
| Yes, it is. | ||
| No way. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Dude, her ass looks great. | ||
| What's that over there in the pink? | ||
| Jessica Simpson is a voluptuous young lady. | ||
| What's that? | ||
| Is that Jessica Simpson? | ||
| No, that's a hoe. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Whatever that is. | ||
| It's a good time. | ||
| She's a good kid. | ||
| Google Jessica Simpson's ass, please. | ||
| Yes, yes. | ||
| Jessica Simpson's one of the top of all time. | ||
| Jessica Simpson? | ||
| As my grandmother would say, she has a lovely figure. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Your grandma's right. | ||
| Wow, I missed that one. | ||
| I never knew that. | ||
| She got real big. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at that baby. | |
| She's naked and pregnant. | ||
| Yeah, get a good one, Jamie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, she has babies. | |
| Don't just click on anyone. | ||
| That's hard to tell. | ||
| Is that her ass? | ||
| She was so fine. | ||
| That's hard to tell. | ||
| That's not her. | ||
| You can't tell. | ||
| That's her? | ||
| You can't tell. | ||
| Is that a Jessica Simpson? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You really can't tell that. | ||
| There's no proof. | ||
| The angles aren't done. | ||
| The low left I'm very impressed with. | ||
| Dude, she is a banger. | ||
| Low left looks very good. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| That could be the angle. | ||
| Her and her prime, man, she's top ten for me. | ||
| What about the pregnant one? | ||
| Ooh, that's pretty good. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Stretch that bitch out, Jamie. | ||
| I don't think that's her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| That is her. | ||
| Seems like an angel, too. | ||
| That is her. | ||
| Is that her? | ||
| Oh, she does have a little booty. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, that's her, bro. | |
| That's her. | ||
| No, no, that's not. | ||
| That's that swimsuit model. | ||
| But! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, that's not her. | |
| That's not her? | ||
| That's her! | ||
| That's the one from Santa Cruz. | ||
| Stop ruining everything that's good in the world. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who's the pregnant girl on time? | |
| Sarah? | ||
| That's her? | ||
| I wouldn't have any problems with that booty. | ||
| That's a good booty. | ||
| How about right there with the blue pants? | ||
| Who's got the best ass ever? | ||
| Has that ever been established? | ||
| Vida Guerrero. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude. | |
| How many people know that? | ||
| She used to be the booty girl before the Instagram days. | ||
| She was during MySpace, she crushed it. | ||
| Does she still have an Instagram? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| She's 42 now, but still dime-pieced out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
42? | |
| 42. Look at her booty. | ||
| Oh, good lord. | ||
| Okay, she wins. | ||
| She just won. | ||
| You weren't ready for that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| You boys weren't ready. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Isn't it amazing that the shape is worth so much more? | ||
| She lives in L.A. too. | ||
| Like having a big ass and having shape like that to your ass. | ||
| Now they all have fake asses. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| No, fake asses I will not accept. | ||
| See, I'm not bad at a fake ass. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Not at all. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm angry at fake asses. | |
| You're like, I gotta take this wing off. | ||
| I don't care if it protects me. | ||
| This shit don't make me look good, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No way. | |
| Look at that ass. | ||
| I don't want the implants, but when they put the cellulite injects into the ass... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Still. | |
| Have you felt one? | ||
| I saw what they look like. | ||
| It looks horrible. | ||
| Nah. | ||
| The ass has to be natural. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| You've been out of the game too long, Eddie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no. | |
| You know what? | ||
| It's really simple. | ||
| You just stick with athletes. | ||
| You boys are out of the game. | ||
| You stick with athletic chicks. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| If you're not athletic... | ||
| It's like two backup quarterbacks. | ||
| I'm out of play. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That's not a fake ass. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| That's all real. | ||
| Yeah, you know what? | ||
| You're out of your mind. | ||
| You're out of your mind, Schwab. | ||
| Fake is not as good. | ||
| No need to fake it. | ||
| All you have to do is squat. | ||
| Tits, you have to fake it sometimes. | ||
| There's nothing you can do. | ||
| But asses! | ||
| You can build. | ||
| You just squat! | ||
| That's your new lifestyle. | ||
| It doesn't matter. | ||
| It's your new lifestyle. | ||
| Squat and ice skate. | ||
| And carbs. | ||
| And ice skate. | ||
| Ice skate. | ||
| Go ice skating! | ||
| Bitches love ice skating! | ||
| How easy is that? | ||
| Go ice skate! | ||
| That's a new meme! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bitches love ice skating! | |
| You should have a t-shirt that you sell. | ||
| It says Eddie Bravo like this. | ||
| With your mouth open, eyes blazing. | ||
| Bitches love ice skating. | ||
| It's easy. | ||
| Ice skate and squat. | ||
| Squat is hard, but once a week, no big deal. | ||
| That is all genetics, my man. | ||
| It is, it is, but you can change it. | ||
| You can improve upon it. | ||
| You can tighten it. | ||
| You can tighten it. | ||
| And you can make it rounder. | ||
| You take any chick, any flat ass chick who skipped PE class, who had ditching notes and never went, you take her at 23. Whatever that is. | ||
| You take her at 25. She realized she fucked up by fucking skipping PE class. | ||
| She realized, shit! | ||
| All them nerdy chicks that were playing soccer, now they're getting all the dudes. | ||
| But if they go to fucking Colorado, find the Olympic squat team, go do some squats for fucking two years, it'll make a big difference, trust me. | ||
| Right, but it ain't beat Vita Guerra. | ||
| You gotta be kissed by God. | ||
| It's not being a Latin girl that's like, what? | ||
| You might have to inject some steroids into that ass. | ||
| Right into the ass. | ||
| Right into the ass. | ||
| Right into both cheeks every day. | ||
| And then squat, squat, squat. | ||
| Squat, squat, squat. | ||
| Squat, squat, squat. | ||
| Three years, you're going to see a big difference. | ||
| And she's going to have a dick that she can drop on your forehead while she rides your face. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a different problem. | |
| Let me just rest this right here. | ||
| That's a different problem. | ||
| It's called surgery. | ||
| Go to Brazil. | ||
| It's in the water, man. | ||
| They have to walk up and touch guards. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Pamela Anderson right now. | |
| She's in this new short film that just showed up online the other day. | ||
| That's Pamela Anderson? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| What is it? | ||
| She's playing a character or something, but that's what she looks like now. | ||
| Oh, this is that new film that's supposed to be really strange. | ||
| They did a piece on it. | ||
| Was it one of those online things that a piece on it? | ||
| A lot of it is her wearing no makeup, and it's pretty gritty and real. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Damn. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a hard world, man. | ||
| It's interesting what these girls become, like, because they go from being the hottest thing in the world where everybody wants to fuck them to being, like, you know, an older lady. | ||
| Look what they can do to you. | ||
| Everybody goes through it, dude. | ||
| No, but women especially. | ||
| Women especially, man. | ||
| In entertainment, it's a motherfucker. | ||
| Especially Pamela Anderson, for sure. | ||
| Karma Electra, all All these beautiful actresses. | ||
| I remember when I moved from Orange County to Hollywood, I thought, what am I going to bring? | ||
| And I brought a couple porno mags. | ||
| I was 21, and I didn't know who Pamela Anderson was. | ||
| I didn't know who she was. | ||
| It was 1991. She was on the cover of Playboy. | ||
| I'm like, I'm bringing this motherfucking one. | ||
| I don't know who that girl is. | ||
| I never looked her name up. | ||
| Turns out she was Pamela Anderson. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| She's like walking along the beach. | ||
| Dude, that's Venice, son. | ||
| Hot young girls in their little skimpy things, and they've got her like... | ||
| Very little makeup on. | ||
| And she had a great life. | ||
| How old is she now? | ||
| She had a great life. | ||
| Yeah, but look at the big sigh. | ||
| She's looking at these girls. | ||
| Dude, and she's drinking juices and shit to look young? | ||
| This is bumming me out, Jamie. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Incense. | ||
| Incense and trying to get her mind right. | ||
| Yoga. | ||
| Namaste. | ||
| She's still got good hair. | ||
| She's a pretty girl. | ||
| But it's just... | ||
| When that's your whole world. | ||
| Never had kids, no cats. | ||
| Smoking. | ||
| No, she has two sons. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I like how when they show her smoking weed. | |
| They're like 22 and shit. | ||
| I'm still not mad at them. | ||
| They party with Tommy Lee. | ||
| Tommy Lee parties with them. | ||
| I like how when they show her smoking weed, she's like sitting down. | ||
| Like it's over. | ||
| She's like crumpled. | ||
| Dude, that was a bummer. | ||
| Dude, you know what? | ||
| I met Pam Anderson once. | ||
| Her brother's an old friend of mine, and we were doing some work together, whatever. | ||
| She lived in Malibu at the height of Pam Anderson. | ||
| She was dating... | ||
| It was after Tommy Lee, but she was dating Marcus Schenkenberg. | ||
| He was a supermodel, 6'5", and me and her brother were in the back smoking weed, and he comes back and goes, Hey, do you mind if I have a couple tokes of that weed? | ||
| So we're sitting back, and I'll never forget thinking... | ||
| This guy, I would never have my girl around this motherfucker. | ||
| I was so blown away. | ||
| I'm like, holy shit. | ||
| He's a dime piece? | ||
| Dude, 6'5". | ||
| Alan Juban would be scared of this motherfucker. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Easy. | |
| 6'5". | ||
| Alan can fight, though. | ||
| Marcus Schenkenberg. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude, I was intimidated. | |
| When you bust out that speed of shots, that's the gayest picture that anybody's ever taken without a dick in their mouth. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I smoked weed with that guy and I was like, holy shit, this guy is intimidating. | |
| It's tough. | ||
| No, no, he's too gay looking. | ||
| Yeah, he's too pretty. | ||
| One of the gays. | ||
| Alan fucks that dude up. | ||
| No, come on! | ||
|
unidentified
|
No way! | |
| The gold underwear, bro. | ||
| I love Alan to death. | ||
| You know that. | ||
| Dude, modeling for me. | ||
| Modeling shot? | ||
| Alan beats him. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| He's a handsome guy, no doubt about it. | ||
| That's 6'5". | ||
| Nah, he looks too like... | ||
| He's a handsome fella. | ||
| He just got his top with the gold underwear. | ||
| He looks like too big. | ||
| Think about this. | ||
| He got Pamela Anderson in her prime. | ||
| Welcome to the club. | ||
| Congratulations. | ||
| Welcome to the club. | ||
| You also probably got a lot of things that she was carrying along with her. | ||
| Tommy Lee gave her. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Tommy Lee said, here's the list. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| How old is she? | ||
| 50-something now? | ||
| Nah, she's probably like close to 50. You seen Cindy Crawford? | ||
| Hot as fuck. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's see what Cindy Crawford looks like right now. | ||
| I saw her in person at a party less than a year ago. | ||
| She's beautiful. | ||
| I saw her six months ago at Santa Monica. | ||
| I can't remember the last time I looked at a girl and was like, she takes care of herself. | ||
| She takes care of herself. | ||
| She's not self-destructive. | ||
| You know, and she's been smart. | ||
| National treasure. | ||
| She's been smart about her health. | ||
| She got that skim cream. | ||
| That shit got me. | ||
| Dude, Christy Brinkley's 60 fucking two years old. | ||
| That's a far shot. | ||
| We need a close shot. | ||
| Listen to me, man. | ||
| I met her. | ||
| I was talking to her for a long time. | ||
| I've seen her in person. | ||
| It was a dark party. | ||
| No, she's outside in the daytime. | ||
| I saw her in daytime, Santa Monica. | ||
| What the fuck you're talking about, bitch? | ||
| Show me some proof. | ||
| It was in light, light, light time. | ||
| Look at that one right there. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| Dude, she's 50, Eddie. | ||
| Well, you know what? | ||
| You know what? | ||
| Christy Brinkley's just as hot. | ||
| She's a decade older. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| I used to have a picture of Cindy Crawford, a poster of Cindy Crawford up in my room. | ||
| That was like my inspiration. | ||
| I was like, fuck! | ||
| Inspiration. | ||
| Yeah, like, I'm like... | ||
| That's why it all didn't work out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly! | |
| Inspiration! | ||
| You mean you just wanted to fuck her? | ||
| It's gotta work out. | ||
| One day I will fuck her. | ||
| One day I will get her. | ||
| It never worked out. | ||
| It never worked out. | ||
| Didn't work out. | ||
| That's the girl, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I gotta get her. | |
| But it kept me on my toes. | ||
| That's the one. | ||
| Well, that's one thing. | ||
| But you look at Christie Brinkley. | ||
| They took a picture of her recently. | ||
| She was 62 in New York. | ||
| And she looks like she's a really hot 34-year-old. | ||
| She might have found that shit you're talking about, that technology. | ||
| She's a dying piece. | ||
| She's probably doing every trick in the book, but the right way. | ||
| Papaya juice, she puts it in her fucking skin cream. | ||
| Look into her skin cream. | ||
| She's trying to tell everybody. | ||
| She's telling everybody, this is how I stay young. | ||
| I put some papaya juice on my face. | ||
| She's not going to tell those young bitches how she's doing it. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| She has infomercials. | ||
| She sells the shit. | ||
| Cindy Crawford skin cream. | ||
| She's 62. That's not a good picture. | ||
| There's a better picture between me. | ||
| That's a pretty good one. | ||
| That's her when she's dirty. | ||
| There's a picture of her on her 62nd birthday. | ||
| That's from Instagram when she's old as fuck. | ||
| There's a really recent picture. | ||
| It's like Christy Brinkley on her 62nd birthday and she's like in a car. | ||
| And you look at her and you go, what? | ||
| How is that possible? | ||
| I mean, there's a lot of them. | ||
| Either way, they all look good. | ||
| You're not going to find one where she looks bad, which is really crazy. | ||
| But that's her, you know... | ||
| Sixty-two! | ||
| Damn! | ||
| She's hot as fuck, look. | ||
| Sixty-fucking-two! | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| She must work out all day. | ||
| Or not. | ||
| Or something. | ||
| Could be genes. | ||
| It could be... | ||
| She knows how to keep it together. | ||
| She's the right doctor. | ||
| Crazy doc. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| What do you think it is? | ||
| She would call this bitch? | ||
| Exercise? | ||
| Let's call this bitch. | ||
| Veganism? | ||
| Is it... | ||
| Definitely not that. | ||
| No, it's genetics. | ||
| Genetics. | ||
| Maybe there's something to veganism. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I've never seen that anyone looks really good at a late age that's saying that that's the only way to do it. | ||
| There's nobody out there? | ||
| The thing that a healthy, balanced diet is certainly the way to stay at least in a reasonably good condition, but then you've got to find the right... | ||
| Amount of amino acids and the right amount of vitamins. | ||
| Would it depend on the person? | ||
| Was Helio a vegan? | ||
| Each body's different. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you know that? | |
| Was he a vegan? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| Vegetarian? | ||
| No. | ||
| Helio? | ||
| No. | ||
| He ate fish. | ||
| He ate meat. | ||
| He ate red meat? | ||
| He had his own farm. | ||
| He made his own cheese. | ||
| He lived in his 90s and he was healthy. | ||
| He was doing arm bars to 93. See, I don't know. | ||
| I heard a conspiracy about them doing Weekend at Bernie's with him. | ||
| No way. | ||
| Come on, man. | ||
| I was like, damn, bro. | ||
| Come on, man. | ||
| How dare you. | ||
| How dare you. | ||
| Gotcha. | ||
| Sorry, Gracie. | ||
| He ate really healthy, though. | ||
| No, dude, he died in his 90s, which is way above average. | ||
| The average age of Americans is 75. He also worked out nonstop. | ||
| He lived 20 years past the average, and he was still like, you know, you see him in interviews, he's old. | ||
| It's got to be physical exertion. | ||
| It looked like his brain was still intact, you know? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's something to that Gracie diet, man. | ||
| Well, it's certainly always smart to watch what you're eating and making sure you get a lot of healthy foods. | ||
| And he wasn't into anything processed, any bullshit. | ||
| No alcohol. | ||
| And the Gracie diet, yeah, no alcohol. | ||
| The Gracie diet's real interesting because the idea behind it is that you make different enzymes for different things. | ||
| Like you would never eat meat with like watermelon. | ||
| You don't mix certain foods. | ||
| You don't mix certain foods. | ||
| And apparently it makes a lot of sense. | ||
| I don't know who came up with it, though. | ||
| I don't know who was the originator of that diet. | ||
| Was it Carlos? | ||
| Maybe it was Carlos. | ||
| Carlos was super into spiritual channeling and all sorts of astrology. | ||
| Heron and Hedder follow it to a team. | ||
| They're way into it, yeah. | ||
| There's something to that. | ||
| Hedder eats acai every single night for dinner. | ||
| They're doing something every single night. | ||
| Like a big-ass bowl of acai. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| With like granola and flax seed and all sorts of stuff. | ||
| Well, those videos that he used to make about how to make juices and all these different things. | ||
| That energy sandwich. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, eating healthy is fucking super important. | ||
| I mean, that's that stupid old cliche that everybody hates, but you are what you eat. | ||
| You are literally what you eat. | ||
| Your body's made out of all the nutrients that you put in it, all the food that you take in. | ||
| If you eat shitty food, your body has shitty materials to work with. | ||
| It's really that simple. | ||
| If you're not healthy and you're eating shitty food, the first thing you should do is stop eating shitty food. | ||
| It tastes so good though, doesn't it? | ||
| So good. | ||
| Motherfucker. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Dude. | |
| And two weeks into no shit, I've had no shit at all. | ||
| You feel good? | ||
| How's that going? | ||
| It changes your appetite. | ||
| Your face looks skinnier. | ||
| Do you feel like it? | ||
| Yeah, I'm losing weight. | ||
| I lost eight pounds. | ||
| What do you weigh now? | ||
| 194. Is it like 198? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, 194 for real. | ||
| No, I lost eight pounds. | ||
| I lost four pounds a week. | ||
| What was the most you've weighed recently? | ||
| I got... | ||
| 205? | ||
| When I hurt my back, I got up to like 205. Maybe even a little heavier than that. | ||
| I got pretty fat, though. | ||
| I had a good belly. | ||
| A good, like, side belly. | ||
| There's nothing worse. | ||
| I felt gross. | ||
| I would catch myself in the mirror and go, Ew, no more eating for you, you fuck. | ||
| You know, it got to... | ||
| Well, when my back was really hurt and it was really tough to work out, there was definitely some... | ||
| Some time to pack on the weight. | ||
| But as soon as I start working out again, your body's got muscle memory. | ||
| If you don't, torture it with shitty food. | ||
| But this diet's different, man, because the idea behind it is that your body starts going into fat-burning mode instead of glucose-burning mode. | ||
| And if you can do that, what happens is, what's weird, this is one of the weirdest parts about it, is in between meals, I don't get really that hungry. | ||
| I don't get the same kind of hungry. | ||
| When you're on glucose, your body crashes, your sugar gets low. | ||
| Ups and downs. | ||
| Yeah, and that crash, you get fucking starving. | ||
| You get desperado for food. | ||
| How long did that take you to get there, though? | ||
| Took a while. | ||
| Like 10 days? | ||
| Six weeks. | ||
| The workouts suck some fat dicks. | ||
| For like the first week. | ||
| I told you who's been doing that diet for literally three or four years is Tebow. | ||
| He's shredded. | ||
| He swears by it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Big. | |
| Kyle Kingsbury's on it. | ||
| Denver quarterback guy? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Kyle Kingsbury was raving about it, and he's one of the guys that got me convinced that this is definitely the way to go. | ||
| Do you think it's only for certain people? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Kingsbury is super shredded. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shredded. | |
| He's a smart motherfucker, man. | ||
| I've always liked that guy. | ||
| He's a great guy. | ||
| Kingsbury can easily do his own podcast, and I hope he does. | ||
| Did he ever get a hold of you, Jamie? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah? | ||
| You guys working it out? | ||
| He married the ring card girl, right? | ||
| Yeah, Natasha. | ||
| They have babies? | ||
| Beautiful family. | ||
| He's doing the damn thing. | ||
| He's an awesome dude. | ||
| He couldn't have been a nicer guy. | ||
| And he knows a lot about health and nutrition. | ||
| He knows a lot about a lot of shit. | ||
| Kyle Kingsbury's a smart dude. | ||
| Got that little ketone meter and everything. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| He did it with me, but it didn't work that way. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| He's up there for top ten most shredded UFC fighters. | ||
| Especially for how big he was. | ||
| He was... | ||
| Jacked. | ||
| Well, he's only been on that ketogenic diet, I think, for this past year, some months, but he's always been super healthy, always a real good athlete. | ||
| He just played football at ASU, that's right. | ||
| Got into MMA way, way late. | ||
| How old? | ||
| I think 26, is that what he said, Jamie? | ||
| I don't remember. | ||
| Late enough to be like... | ||
| Around the same time as I got it at 24. Yeah. | ||
| You know what's also interesting about him? | ||
| I don't want to talk about it. | ||
| I don't want to discuss it. | ||
| I want to move on. | ||
| It's beautiful. | ||
| But what's interesting about him is he's anti-vaccine. | ||
| Let's move on. | ||
| Let's move on. | ||
| Alright, please. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let's move on. | |
| Let's go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Vaccines. | |
| Let's move on. | ||
| My kid just got vaccines. | ||
| All of them? | ||
| Not all of them. | ||
| Yeah, be careful. | ||
| Did he get the Hep B one? | ||
| You definitely want to get your kid vaccinated, 100%. | ||
| There's many different doctors that prescribe many what they believe are more conservative protocols. | ||
| And there's a lot of doctors, again, doctors, who are leaning towards that because they feel like it gives your baby time to recover from the vaccines. | ||
| It's not... | ||
| Questioning the efficacy of vaccines, it's saying that there might be some debate as to how many you stack, like how many you put together. | ||
| They just gave them one shot. | ||
| So you're saying there's a possibility that if you crunch them in together that there could be problems because there's too much of the baby to take? | ||
| There's a vaccine court, okay? | ||
| And if you Google it, Find out how much money has been paid off by people that took vaccines and got injured or ill. | ||
| Kids, babies that had issues because of vaccines. | ||
| Shit. | ||
| It definitely has existed. | ||
| Is that low percent though? | ||
| It's also, you have to deal with how many numbers of people. | ||
| You're talking about 300 million people. | ||
| And you know how many of those people are allergic to walnuts? | ||
| How many of those people, if they get around cats, they could die? | ||
| Yeah, they're the exception, yeah. | ||
| But that is the exception also. | ||
| Biodiversity is a real thing. | ||
| The same medicine that they give you and you'd be fine, they could give me and I could get deathly ill. | ||
| That's a natural fact of being a human being. | ||
| And that's something that people don't exactly factor in when they start talking about vaccines. | ||
| Everybody thinks that it's either some crazy government conspiracy to make everybody retarded, or it's something that you have to do or we're all going to die. | ||
| Well, what about the CDC study from 2004 that they had to do a study, the CDC, to make sure that the MMR vaccine didn't, there wasn't autism links. | ||
| There was three doctors that were in charge of that study. | ||
| So when the results showed initially that there were no links to autism. | ||
| With the MMR vaccine. | ||
| But years later, and it's happening right now, one of the doctors, Dr. William Thompson, he still works for the CDC. This is not a conspiracy theory. | ||
| He said, we were told to put all links to autism from the MMR vaccine into the garbage. | ||
| Word for word, verbatim, into the garbage. | ||
| So this is actually happening right now. | ||
| So the studies... | ||
| Let's find that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| Watch that. | ||
| Dr. William S. Thompson, MMR vaccine. | ||
| Is this a YouTube video? | ||
| No, this is real, dude. | ||
| This is not fake. | ||
| YouTube videos are real. | ||
| I'm not lying here. | ||
| It's on a YouTube video that I can watch. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You're saying he said that, so there's a video of him? | ||
| Oh, there's mad videos and mad literature. | ||
| I don't know about vaccinations. | ||
| No, that's actually true. | ||
| That's not a conspiracy theory. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How about circumcision? | |
| You know, circumcision, they asked me today, do you want to circumcise your baby? | ||
| I said, yeah, I don't want to have that anteater dick. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| $400. | ||
| Dude, baby's dicks, when you cut them like that, first of all, sometimes kids lose their dick. | ||
| Sometimes they get infections. | ||
| It's dangerous. | ||
| It doesn't always happen. | ||
| Are you circumcised, too? | ||
| Yeah, but I didn't have a choice. | ||
| But if I had to choose today, I would say no. | ||
| I'm on the fence. | ||
| Is your kid circumcised or not? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| We have like three days to decide. | ||
| Don't do it. | ||
| Don't do it. | ||
| It's fucking mutilation. | ||
| It's a cultural thing, and people like the way it looks better. | ||
| You know, whatever, man. | ||
| You're mutilating your kid's dick. | ||
| The idea behind it is barbaric. | ||
| It's archaic. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| It's unnecessary surgery. | ||
| It's trauma. | ||
| You're cutting the kid's skin. | ||
| You have an ant either? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| If he decides when he gets older to get circumcised, it's not hard to do. | ||
| People have done it like deep into their 30s. | ||
| You can do whatever you want. | ||
| They tried telling me it's unhealthy. | ||
| He doesn't have the chance. | ||
| It's not true. | ||
| It's bullshit. | ||
| I said God gave you that hood for a reason. | ||
| Congressman, a CDC whistleblower, and an autism tempest in a trash can. | ||
| Damn, that's Forbes, son. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| I found a site that didn't seem like a legit one, so I tried to find something. | ||
| And is this saying what Eddie Ruther was saying? | ||
| Let's just pretend we forgot. | ||
| Let's talk about something else. | ||
| Figure out vaccines. | ||
| Yeah, we gotta switch up the subject. | ||
| What else can we change? | ||
| If we go deep into the... | ||
| Take that down! | ||
| Quick, take it down. | ||
| If we go deep into conspiracy theory rabbit hole, we're going to need to show booties. | ||
| The whole podcast is fucked. | ||
| Or maybe like feet porn. | ||
| Bring up Throatzilla. | ||
| Bring up Throatzilla. | ||
| We should get out of here. | ||
| I ain't going to. | ||
| I gotta get up early in the morning. | ||
| Me too, brother. | ||
| Let's wrap this motherfucker up. | ||
| This was the most non-fight-oriented podcast ever. | ||
| No, we covered some fight. | ||
| We barely covered the cowboy fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
True. | |
| Finally Kid coming to Denver and Irvine, live. | ||
| Oh, hey, look at that plug. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| Where are you going? | ||
| Denver and Irvine. | ||
| Denver and Irvine. | ||
| Yes, sir. | ||
| What are you guys doing in Denver? | ||
| March 18th and 19th. | ||
| What club? | ||
| What place? | ||
| Comedy Works. | ||
| Comedy Works, beautiful. | ||
| Tech Center. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| And then we're at the Irvine Improv, March 16th. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Fighterandthekid.com. | ||
| tfatk.com. | ||
| tfatk.com. | ||
| Eddie Bravo on Twitter. | ||
| Uncle Creepy. | ||
| Uncle Creepy? | ||
| Uncle Creepy. | ||
| Creepy now with a shoulder problem. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uncle Creepy MMA. I'm helping open a cryotherapy place. | |
| We're going to have cryotherapy and hyperbaric chambers in Lake Forest. | ||
| Well, there you go. | ||
| Fuck the podcast. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Let's fire it up. | ||
| Let's fire that podcast up. | ||
| March 15th in Lake Forest, California. | ||
| It's a therapy cryo salon. | ||
| Let us know. | ||
| We'll tweet the shit out of that. | ||
| Yeah, definitely you need to have your own podcast. | ||
| Who wants to listen to me talk too much? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I do. | |
| I like it. | ||
| Alright, that's it. | ||
| Goodnight, everybody. | ||
| Oh, Jamie Vernon. | ||
| Shout out to Jamie Vernon on Twitter. | ||
| The best. | ||
| Powerful, powerful young Jamie. | ||
| Someone get me and Jamie some Yeezys. | ||
| We'll be back tomorrow with Action Bronson. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| No way! | ||
| Yeah, that's right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| What's Action Bronson? |
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