Steven Hassan, a former Unification Church recruit and cult expert, reveals how the Moonies exploited his 1970s vulnerability—sleep deprivation, isolation, and "love bombing"—to implant false memories of childhood abuse, mirroring Scientology’s traumatic "auditing" tactics. His book Combating Cult Mind Control (1988) distinguishes destructive cults from benign ones, citing UN human rights standards while critiquing groups like ISIS and sex trafficking for similar psychological manipulation. Hassan argues cults thrive on disconnection and fear, yet cautions against blanket rejection of family, even after abuse, emphasizing neuroplasticity and ethical healing over rigid ideology. Rogan questions these approaches but praises Hassan’s expertise before pivoting to the next segment. [Automatically generated summary]
It was Sam the Butcher and Joe the Barber, and my great-grandfather was a chazan, which is a singer of holy songs, like a cantor would be the term now.
And when my grandfather came to Ellis Island, he didn't speak English, and they wrote it up as H-A-S-S-A-N. And so I've lived my life being thought of as an Arab, Being persecuted at times by Jews.
They would look at me, and then they'd say, you don't look Sephardic, I'm Ashkenazi, but anyway, you know, like, act with some dignity and compassion and kindness.
The first time I was actually physically assaulted was during the Six Day War back in the 60s when I was in elementary school on a stairwell in Queens, New York.
I got ahold of you because of my friend Nate Quarry, who used to fight for the UFC, and he is one who connected me to you, and he was a Jehovah's Witness for a while.
So first, let me just say that book first came out in 1988, and it had a fellow on the front cover who looked a little bit like you, but clean-shaven, and he had a padlock and a chain around his forehead.
And anyway, it's been out for 25, 27 years now in hardback, and I've finally bought the rights back, and I've updated it post-Internet, including terrorists and human trafficking, and including people born into cults like the Jehovah's Witnesses.
So that said...
I grew up in a conservative Jewish family, the youngest of three.
My mom was an art teacher.
My dad had a hardware store.
I was a musician before that and after that.
And I really didn't like the Judaism that I was taught, but I was very close to my mom and my maternal grandfather.
He was Orthodox.
And I grew up with a spiritual feeling and connection, and I still feel that connection.
And I'm actually part of an alternative Jewish community for the last 17 years.
But the point that I want to say is that there's a whole range, and I actually gave you a blow-up of a graphic.
I don't know if you're going to use it, but...
Of ethical influence and unethical influence.
And the idea is that one can look at specific behavioral components and determine whether or not it's a destructive cult or a benign cult or a constructive cult.
So the word cult in and of itself tends to be pejorative, but...
As someone who was quoted in the book called The Cult of Mac as a disciple, myself, in the book.
I do believe that people there are certain people that are in a cult of Mac a hundred percent I noticed it in the 90s when I was on news radio all the people on the staff all the people that work behind the scenes they would get so excited when a new OS operating system came out Apple OS and they would talk about it like we've got a new one now it's gonna be better than Windows it's gonna be amazing yeah there's a science as a social science to creating a cult but again I cite the byte model and cite that you know If there's
deception, so there's lack of informed consent, if there's extreme use of fear and guilt, if there's information control where people are being told you can't talk to critics or defectors or you need to cut off from family or friends who are questioning you, I'm concerned about human rights.
I think the easiest way to understand what I do as a former cult member myself, it's really in support of the United Nations Union.
Yeah, and I would actually blow the frame up a little bit bigger, since I've been doing this work for 39 years, and I would say I'm against undue influence.
It's a legal term for exploitative influence as compared to ethical influence where like a therapist is trying to help somebody to confront their fears or his influence of helping somebody who is addicted to something that's that's killing them.
I don't think I would be part of a spiritual community after everything I've been through that wasn't super healthy and giving me more than I was taking from me.
Some people in Boston call it a cult, and I'm a happily say I've been there for 17 years from the very beginning of his invitation to become a rabbi there.
And we've had our ups and downs, but it's healthy, it's accountable, the membership makes the agenda, it's not top-down, you know, a dictatorship-type thing, it's the membership.
And the key is, you know, if somebody calls you on your shit, That you step back and you listen and you reflect and you either correct your behavior or you don't.
And if you don't and if you're a part of a community like that in a leadership role, then they ask you to leave.
See, it's so weird to me that you're like an anti-cult guy, but this is clearly, at the very least, a very strong ideology with some pretty rigid sort of classifications of things.
For me, I just want to grow, and I like being part of a group that's bigger than myself, particularly one that's interested in Helping Boston where members of the Greater Boston Interfaith Organization where we're fighting for justice to raise minimum wage to help Get rid of egregious banking fees on immigrants.
We bring in pro-Palestinian peace activists to speak.
We bring in Steve Hassan to speak about cults.
We do all kinds of interesting programming.
And I love being part of a community.
And on a personal note, when I had cancer nine years ago, At Hodgkin's Lymphoma, people were offering to drive me to the hospital, make us meals, and it was just great to feel like we weren't alone facing that.
That's great, and that's what I always hear from people that are in Christian churches that really, really enjoy it.
They really enjoy the community, and they really enjoy the bond that they have with all these folks, and that it seems like coming together and sitting together on Sunday or whenever you do it and worshiping, That really, in fact, part of what's going on there is you're all making this sort of agreement to look at the possibility of there being a higher good for all of us and that you all join together in this.
And then you get this bonding, this feeling of community that we kind of don't really have that much in this world.
A lot of folks don't know their neighbors.
I have a buddy who lives in an apartment building.
It's like 50 floors.
He doesn't know a fucking single person until That's so crazy.
And that's part of what needs to be changed, in my opinion, to make the world a healthier place where people do know their neighbors and they do offer help if somebody needs help.
I also think that, you know, modern culture and civilization and technology has created a false construct of what's important and what's real, where beingness and being part of a family or a community or a tribe Mattered as a central theme of our identity.
Now it's consumerism and what status you have at your job or how much you're making or what car you're driving and where you're going on vacation.
And this information overload and sleep deprivation that is very troubling.
The Scientologist will tell you, oh, Joe, you just licked your lips or your knee quivered.
No, you've got to just freeze for 20 minutes.
It's creating an altered state of consciousness known as trance.
And I know we're going to talk more about trance, I'm sure.
There's nothing wrong with trance states, but when you're in a trance state you're more suggestible to someone who has authority and who has an agenda to implant ideas in your head.
Because you're not in your critical analytic part of your mind.
They're desensitizing people from normal social cues and interactions, and they're cultivating a compliant, obedient, trans identity as a Scientologist.
Actually staring at a candle, staring at a spot on a wall, that's known in hypnosis language as an eye fixation technique, is a very, very common technique for inducing an altered state of consciousness.
Why?
Because the eyes are pretty wired to move and scan.
And I should also say hypnosis is not sleep.
It's an altered state of consciousness that's best characterized as concentration or absorption.
And I just want to say one more time, There's nothing wrong with that state.
I like that state.
I do self-hypnosis.
I do meditation.
I do many different altered states, techniques.
The point is I'm in control.
I'm deciding.
I don't have somebody who's alienating me from my own inner voice and my own self and trying to imprint me with a totalistic ideology that's black and white, us versus them, good versus evil.
Yeah, I was wanting an ideal world and looking around at what I saw in the media and the Russians were going to nuke us and already I was sensitized to global climate change way back then.
I was in the last draft lottery to go to Vietnam.
Anyway, I had been basically dumped by my girlfriends at 19. Chicks.
And I was kind of bummed, and I was sitting in the cafeteria waiting for the new semester to start, and three women, pretending to be students, dressed like students, carrying books like students, asked if they can share my table, and they started asking me about the books that I had for my course.
And not only that, but later when I got recruited into the group, I was told to drop out of Queens College from the cult sent back to Queens College to start a student group on campus to get people into the student group so they would drop out of Queens College.
They didn't say, by the way, masturbation is a sin, and Father's going to line us up with thousands of people in the sign who you're going to marry, and you have to wait four years to have sex with them.
It's all about saving the person's soul and step-by-step incremental recruitment, finding out as much as you can about the person, saying almost nothing about what you are about and what the group is about.
I was real vulnerable when I was like 18. So the reality is, as human beings, we have life cycle events where we're situationally vulnerable.
Death of a loved one, breakup of a relationship, you know, moving to a new city, state or country, illness.
There are things that every human being goes through.
And for me, it's an overwhelming ignorance of the public to kind of blame the victims.
Like, you were stupid for believing in this.
Like, what was wrong with you?
You were weak for falling for this.
As opposed to, tell me about your experience and tell me what happened.
You know, there's a principle in social psychology called the fundamental attribution error.
I know that's a lot of syllables, but it basically is the single most important principle of social psychology.
And what it means is, what I was basically saying before, when people try to understand why other people are doing what they do, they over-attribute individual variables and they under-attribute social environmental variables.
I think one of the things about a person being older and wiser, you always hear that expression, older and wiser.
But if you really look at it mathematically, well, what is it?
It's data.
It's accumulation of data and the understanding of the relationships between events, reactions, and consequences.
And when you're 18 years old, you don't have a lot of data.
You only have a few things that are going on.
And for me when I was 18, it was the breakup of me and this girl that I was dating and all of a sudden becoming a man, being responsible, having to go to college or get some sort of a job or some sort of a career and just the overwhelming possibilities of the future.
And not having any clue as to how it was all going to play out.
I was terrified.
And if someone came along right then, I feel like they could have got me.
I feel like I was real vulnerable around 18. When I met this hot Puerto Rican girl, I think I was about 20. And I was pretty determined at that time.
That's very important because there's a lot of different things that can lock you in and then start to control you and start to suck money off of you and start to really dictate your behavior in a very unhealthy way.
And that is so common.
There's so many different versions of it.
It almost seems to be like a pattern of human behavior and thinking, like a code that you can kind of crack, like a cheat code in people.
We've experienced a revolution in science and medicine and in psychology, and in particular social psychology.
There's been so many, you know, pivotal experiments in the last 50 to 100 years that give us windows into understanding our vulnerabilities.
So, for example, when I'm counseling someone who's involved with a destructive cult, I don't start out by saying, hey, you're in a cult, let me liberate you or something.
In fact, my whole approach is empowering people to think for themselves.
So I ask them questions with respect, because I really want them to think about it.
In any case, I show them the Ash Conformity Study, Solomon-Ash.
So the Solomon-Ash Conformity Study was framed to the people coming into it as a visual perception experiment.
Basically, they'd be brought into a room with several people in a semi-circle, and there'd be a person in the front with a card with four lines on it, a sample line, And then three other lines of different sizes.
Let's say a three inch sample line, a three inch, a four inch, and a five inch.
But everyone is in on the experiment except the person in seat six.
And after going around twice giving the correct answer, everyone confidently starts giving the wrong same answer.
And the test is how many people will start to conform To giving the wrong answer, even though they can see with their own eyes what the correct answer is.
And that study's been replicated thousands of times, and the answer is two-thirds start giving the wrong answer, even though they know intellectually that it's the wrong answer because it feels too uncomfortable to be in the room.
And I even show a Dateline, an old Dateline episode, where they asked Anthony Practicanis, who's one of the foremost social psychologists, to actually do the study so they could film it.
And they start out with this Asian woman who is the heroic resistor.
Who gives the correct answer, but she's grimacing as she's giving the wrong answer, even though she knows it's the right answer.
But because of the social forces, we have mirror neurons we want to fit into the people in the room.
So anyway, after the Ash Conformity Study, the Milgram Obedience Study, Stanley Milgram did a test.
At the time, the dominant theory in psychology for explaining how the Nazis could do what they did was called the Authoritarian Personality.
And Milgram said, I wonder if Americans would do the very same thing.
And he developed this ingenious shock box, which really was a set of switches that had no electricity at all, but it sounded electrical.
And he basically would bring people in, tell them they're doing a scientific experiment that's very important, that tests memory and punishment and learning.
And set people up into a situation where they thought they were giving an electrical shock to the person in the next room, and it was all tape recorded, and it would increase 15 volts from mild to moderate to severe to extreme to XXXX. And there'd be a guy in a white lab coat acting very proper who happened to be a high school teacher who was moonlighting for a few extra bucks.
And the test was how many people would electrocute a fellow human being in an hour because an authority figure told them they had to because they had made a commitment to do a scientific experiment.
In fact, there's a movie that's coming out about it called The Experimenter.
And the next study that I'm about to mention, the movie just came out a week or two ago called The Stanford Prison Experiment of Philip Zimbardo, who is one of my mentors.
He taught a course at Stanford called The Psychology of Mind Control for 15 years and used two chapters of my original book in it.
And he was also president of the American Psychological Association.
But he...
So in his experiment, he randomly divided guys into guards and prisoners, and he did basically control behavior, information, thoughts, and emotions.
And people started having nervous breakdowns, and some of the guards started becoming sadistic.
And instead of saying, you know what, I don't want to do the experiment anymore, they had gotten so sucked into the experience that their only out was to have a nervous breakdown.
So when I'm helping people understand what happens in the Scientology cult, the Mooney cult, the TM cult, or any number of other destructive cults, I want them to first...
So, the answer is you don't need to be in a room with other people to be in a mind control cult, but it can get inside your head and create a new cult identity that suppresses your real identity and it's not healthy.
The point is that it's a tool for training consciousness.
And ultimately, depending on your level of training, you want to not be a victim of your thoughts or your feelings.
You want to not only develop a perspective and a wisdom approach, In consciousness, you want to also get out of the entire frame of self-dialogue and total beingness.
But any group that says you have to do it our way or else, or if you're having bad reactions, they say that's good, you're unstressing, keep doing it.
And Maharishi was saying if they didn't have 40,000 cities, which meant people were hopping around thinking they were levitating, that the world would blow up.
So he was using the whole fear trip thing to raise a lot of money to get people to be these devotees.
But the thing is, emotions, if you're having doubts or if you're having bad feelings, it's telling you to look at what's happening and maybe you need to make a change.
But if you're in the TM movement and you're having bad feelings about the group, you're told that you need to meditate to get rid of that.
And that's known as thought stopping.
That's one of the...
The techniques in the T of the Byte model to shut down any reality testing.
In the Moonies, we were taught to chant, crush Satan, crush Satan.
How can an intelligent person from an intact family who is gonna be a professional writer and be a college professor get sucked into a cult that wants to take over the world, make an automatic theocracy, abolish Satanic democracy.
Kill everyone that doesn't believe.
It was literally what we were pretty much told by Moon that, you know, we needed to reclaim the earth for God, not unlike ISIS and a few other cults out there.
I was told the Holocaust was necessary because the Jews didn't accept Jesus.
But my point being is, if they were not much older than you, if at all, and they were also victims of the same ideology, cult, whatever you want to call it, why would they be looking to manipulate you?
So members were taught to believe, as they still are, that the world is headlong into an Armageddon situation of any moment.
Judgment Day is happening and as much as you can to bring people into God and save their soul.
Saving a person in the moon is meant saving 10 generations of their father's ancestors that are in the spirit world and their mother's ancestors in the spirit world.
And they're all looking at you all the time Hoping you're going to make good decisions because if you do good things for God, you're going to make good vitality elements that will feed them in the spirit world.
And every cult has its own convoluted yet internally totalistic system.
But unlike Scientology, the Moonies are like, save others.
Scientology is like, you know, become a god and control everybody.
You were only in it for two years, so this had to be a very quick transition from you, Steve Hassan, normal college student, to boom, full-on fasting for Nixon.
Now, for some of my clients, they're literally at a vulnerable point in their life, maybe they're religious, and they're praying, Dear God, tell me what to do.
You know, should I leave my marriage?
You know, what should I do?
And the next thing they know, the doorbell is ringing, and it's the Jehovah's Witnesses who want to study the Bible, and they're like, Misattributing thinking God just rang the doorbell as opposed to these people are going ringing every single doorbell within a six block.
They're knocking on every door, and every now and then they get that one ball that's in the strike zone, and that's Steve Hassan sitting there with his pile of books.
Well, in my case, so I went to this three-day workshop.
I didn't want to stay.
I was a waiter on the weekends.
I was busy.
I can't go away on a weekend.
And they just kept saying, it's going to be so great.
I didn't even know it was a workshop.
And after two years of working at the Holiday Inn in Hempstead as a banquet waiter on the weekends, I call up to find out when I'm supposed to report in, and he says, Steve, you won't believe it, but the wedding was canceled, so take the weekend off.
And I had just had these women working on me all week, and I was like, well, maybe I'm meant to...
Well, I did give them my word, but I gave them my word thinking I was never going to have a weekend off.
And then I was kind of like, well, maybe I'm meant to go.
Maybe I should do this.
So I say, okay, I'm free for the weekend.
Let's go.
And we're driving up.
It's the middle of the winter through this palatial estate.
And they say, by the way, this weekend we're having a joint workshop with the Unification Church.
And I said, what?
Church?
Nobody said anything about church and workshop.
Nobody said anything about a workshop.
What's up with that?
And they did the typical turn-it-around-on-you technique of, Steve, do you have issues with Christians?
Are you biased against Christians?
And all of a sudden now I'm on the defensive.
But there were no cell phones back then in 1974. It's the middle of the night.
I have an option of getting out in the snow and trying to hitchhike.
I'm like, what am I... Well, just wait for the morning.
Just stay here and we'll drive you back in the morning.
So Moon himself was apparently in a cult in North Korea, and it turns out that most cult leaders were in a cult themselves, so they didn't learn the techniques out of thin air.
But the interesting thing about my former cult...
Was that the CIA set up the Korean CIA, because there had been two coups in South Korea to that point, and they were very worried about North Korean brainwashing, and they thought, you know, we need to do something to stabilize South Korea.
So they had this brilliant idea of creating a private group that would help to re-educate political dissonance.
It's called Victory Over Communism.
And I only know about this because there was a Koreagate investigation from 76 to 78 where the founder of the Korean CIA was interviewed and he said he, quote, organized and utilized the Unification Church for use as a political tool, unquote.
And two weeks in the hospital, sleeping, eating away from the group.
I missed my sister, Thea, who was the only person in my life.
My previous life that didn't say I was in a cult or brainwashed.
She was always just like, I love you and I don't understand.
This doesn't seem like you, Steve.
I reached out to her, not because I wanted to leave, but because I missed her.
And she was like, you have two nephews.
I want them to know they're Uncle Steve.
Come and visit.
And I'm like, if you promise not to tell the parents, I can arrange it because I'm a leader.
And she promised and fortunately she broke her promise and she told my parents and they hired some ex-members and they did a deprogramming intervention with me.
But at the point that I said I want to leave and they wouldn't let me leave, I could have been something about false imprisonment.
But the long and the short of it is I was so confident that what I was doing was correct and that I wasn't brainwashed.
And at a critical juncture where they were moving locations because the cult was coming after me to rescue me, my father weeped.
He just started crying and said, what would you do if it was your son who dropped out of school, quit his job and donated his bank account and got involved with a controversial group?
How would you feel?
And he was crying.
And I never saw my father cry.
And it just touched the real me.
And my cult self thought he was brainwashed by the communist media against father.
But the real me was like, Dad really loves me.
And I want to prove to him that I'm not brainwashed.
So I said, what do you want me to do?
He said, I just want you to talk with them for another four days.
Like, have an open mind.
And if you want to go back, at least your mother and I will be able to sleep at night knowing we did the responsible thing.
And I agreed.
And I had this four days where they were teaching me about thought reform and the psychology of totalism, which was a book by Robert J. Lifton about Chinese Communist brainwashing of the 50s.
I had all of these experiences that were starting to surface that had been suppressed during my leadership.
It's the same mechanism that allows people to be inspired, the same mechanism that allows people to be manipulated.
You know, that mechanism being you see something, there's something about it that makes you excited.
Like a great performance, a great concert, or an athletic performance where you get out of there, you just feel inspired.
A great book that inspires you, it manipulates your brainwaves, it manipulates your consciousness.
And it steers you in a certain direction.
Is that same sort of mechanism that allows people to be influenced by others what allows people to be manipulated by others in this form, where you can actually literally change the way they think and view the world?
Well, I think you need to have the analytic part of your mind and a consciousness that just because it sounds great and looks great doesn't mean that it isn't great.
What I'm trying to get at is when you see things and when information and data gets into your mind, it influences you in this very strange way that can be positive and it can be inspirational, like whether it's seeing Michael Jordan put on an incredible performance or Ronda Rousey beating someone.
Those moments where someone does something truly great and it's fuel for you.
It's fuel.
Is that the same sort of mechanism that they kind of tap into to change your mind?
I talk about, in the book, like a virus that gets in and corrupts your operating system.
You still have your original one, but now this malware has been inserted, and now you're working.
You think that it's you, and I thought it was Steve, just the true Steve.
And that the old Steve was the fallen Steve.
But stepping back and getting perspective and seeing the patterns of mind control and manipulation in other groups and then reflecting back on your own experience is one of the basic tenets of what I do in my work, helping family members to rescue loved ones or helping people who were either born in a cult or recruited into a cult.
It wasn't that someone stood over me and told me, but it was part of the whole indoctrination system, listening to other people talking about abuses in their families, etc.
But I literally, when I first got out of the group, I thought I was miserable, depressed, that my father was physically abusive.
And when I said to my sister, well, dad was physically abusive, she went, what?
So I had one real memory that everything else was built off of, and it was an actual event that happened.
I think I was 11 or 12. My father wanted to know where the change was for lunch, and I had bought baseball cards or something, and I lied, and my father slapped my face.
That was the one time my father hit me.
But I really believed it.
And my sisters were like, Dad never hit us because his father beat the crap out of him.
Dad's issue wasn't he didn't want to hug us or hold us, but Dad was not physically abusive.
Just formed false memories based on that right and what what Scientology does is they have you go back and and and remember abuse from the past But then once you're done remembering whatever happened then you go into your past lives to remember all the abuse.
That's where it's really And it keeps going on and on.
Qualitative difference between desensitization around a word or something and actually trauma processing.
Harvard was using a very old model of catharsis, that you have to remember the abuse and you have to re-experience the abuse over and over and over again.
And that's been thrown out by the mental health profession decades ago.
Why?
Because you're re-victimizing people.
Having them suffer the experience over and over and over again.
If I want to help someone who's been abused, I tell them you have to be in your body, in the here and now, and you have a window or a TV screen seeing the younger you.
But you're safe.
You're here.
The abuse happened over there.
And I don't want them to have associated memories.
I want them to know that they're safe, that that did happen, but it's just incorrect to think the brain and the emotions are a battery and all you need to do is drain it and then it's gone.
We opened this up by talking about different types of cults.
And if any ideology that's black and white and that you're trying to compress human experience into the ideology is worrisome because no model is true.
But the goal as a therapist is do no harm and empower the person to be functional.
Right?
The goal isn't to trauma process.
So in the last few years I've been trained in a form of attachment therapy where People who have personality disorders, which were hitherto believed to be permanent, can actually be cured in two to three years.
And the technique is basically using hypnotherapy technique where you're asking the person to go back to a key traumatic moment in their childhood and asking them to imagine if they had the ideal mother or the ideal father that was uniquely suited to them.
And they did exactly what you wanted them to do in that situation.
And ask their imagination to fill in the scene.
The person literally can create a positive reference point of safety Of security, of love, of connection, all the things that children need to experience to have a healthy sense of self.
And people know that they were abused.
But they're reparenting, to use another term.
They're internally using their imagination.
They're reparenting themselves.
And what is now proven neuroscientifically is there's neurogenesis and neuroplasticity to the point where people can know that they were abused, remember it, but they can act as if they had that healthy mother and their healthy father and a healthy childhood.
But they're no longer walking around Bleeding all over the place, afraid to trust somebody, having self-doubt, unable to touch and have sexual contact that feels good, because they've created these reference experiential states for themselves.
Now these reference experiential states that they create, these theories and these practices of therapy, someone has to invent these.
Like someone has to look at the problems, they have to figure out what's the best way to approach these things and come up with an idea and hope that it works.
And as you said, there's like the L. Ron Hubbard methods that he was using that were really ancient.
They thought that was going to work and it didn't work.
Yeah, and he was never a mental health professional, but he was arrested for practicing medicine without a license, and they did call it a religion to try to...
In my case, I was out of the cult for four years when I first saw a formal hypnotist do a trance on somebody, and my reaction was, I used to do that when I was doing lectures.
Like, I had no awareness that I had been taught to do hypnotic methods.
I was told to model the older brothers, and it was kind of a behavioral modeling kind of thing.
And I started wanting to learn hypnosis.
I wanted to understand what it was, what it wasn't, how to do it ethically.
And essentially, there has been a lot of trial and error and a lot of people have gotten hurt by the misuse of it.
But if you're in a professional organization where there's a strict code of ethics...
Where there are clear boundaries and people can trust that you're there just to help them.
It's not about keeping you as a client forever.
It's like the faster you can get out of treatment and just live your life, the happier the therapist is.
And the more you can teach the person about how And how to know themselves and how to control their feelings or control their thoughts, etc., the better.
What is happening right now in Europe, because of socialized medicine, is they really are testing a lot of these approaches and demonstrating that people, for example, with narcissistic personality disorder actually get cured after two to three years.
Well, it's like if your real life is this storyline, and you create an alternate one that you use as a default, where instead of a parent beating you when you're asking for help, or saying you're being a sissy, but you have someone saying, tell me what's wrong, you know, do you need a hug?
And they're visualizing that and feeling like there's someone who's really there for them, that's an anchor, that's a good role model for them.
It really can enable them at the point that they're parenting their children to not just reenact the modeling that they learned and beat the crap out of their kid, but actually behave like a healthy person would want to act. but actually behave like a healthy person would want to It's beautiful that all these theories are being developed and tested and applied.
I think we're at a very low level of evolution in terms of our understanding of things.
People are able to get out of the most horrendous abuse of childhoods and be functional and not just commit suicide or be drug addicts or be psychotic in a mental ward, but they're able to function.
And what we're learning about the brain is just wonderful.
I'm excited about the future in terms of that.
That said, There's a huge potential for abuse of the techniques.
Yeah, I mean, we can all sort of empathize with that.
Of course, anybody who has children will look at, if you love your children, you look at people who were abused as children or abused especially by their parents, and it's just this unbelievably painful thing to hear.
Forget about witness or be a part of, but to hear about someone being beaten by their parents or abused in some sort of a way.
I had my friend Barry Crimmins on the podcast yesterday.
Great stand-up comedian from Boston, and he has a new movie that's out today.
It's called Call Me Lucky that Bob Goldthwait directed.
And it's about his...
He was raped when he was four by his babysitter's boyfriend.
Multiple times.
It's this horrible, horrible, horrible traumatic story.
And a big part of his life is his...
His perseverance and overcoming this thing that happened to him when he was four.
You know, I mean, this trauma has sort of like defined him in some ways and strengthened him in other ways that his ability to overcome it, showing his perseverance.
Because that would be someone who'd be vulnerable for someone who, you know, would have some reaching for a utopian view of the world or some better way, because you know the horror of the abuse, right?
So when you saw Going Clear, were you happy that...
I'm in the middle of the book right now.
It's goddamn amazing.
It's amazing when you go over L. Ron Hubbard's past and how absolutely ridiculous it was.
How many times he lied about things, all the nonsense that he said, and all the different times he was caught lying, and all the different people in his life that he would just make up crazy stories about being this World War II hero.
So Larry Wright and HBO did a documentary based on that book.
Larry Wright, Janet Reitman.
They all took their material from my friend John A. Tech, who was a former member, OT5, who wrote a book called A Piece of Blue Sky.
And John put together this conference in Toronto called Getting Clear.
The website is gettingclear.co.
And we debunked not only Hubbard, but the entire policies inside the organization.
I was explaining mind control, and it's going to be made live on the internet that people can watch.
The reason that he did this and why I encouraged him to do this was people were leaving David Miscavige's Church of Scientology but starting their own splinter group of Scientology where they were still idolizing Hubbard and still doing the tech and we wanted to debunk the whole thing from start to finish and I think it was done very masterfully.
So, for example, the number two man and number three man, Marty Rathbun and Mike Rinder, had left the group and were spilling all the secrets of what, you know, all the criminal activities that were being done.
They were creating independent Scientologists and trying to keep doing auditing and keep doing the processing.
If anyone listening wants to know about Scientology, it's TonyOrtega.org.
He wrote a book called The Unbreakable Miss Lovely about Paulette Cooper, who was a friend of mine when I left the Moonies in 1976. She wrote a book called The Scandal of Scientology.
And the book is all about her life story and how this group harassed the hell out of her.
They do all the bite model, the behavior control, information control, thought control, emotional control, make people over into a new identity and they are dependent and obedient.
And I've co-developed a curriculum to help survivors to end the game to understand because that's what pimps call what they do, the game.
So to basically understand that they don't love You know, the women in their stable, that they're products for exploitation, and the only way to win the game is to end it and get out and have a life.
So, if you read some of the manuals online by pimps, how to brainwash the hose, is their terminology for women, I actually tell the story in Chapter 6 of Rachel Thomas who was recruited while she was a junior at Emory College.
She's a beautiful black woman and she was recruited by a pimp Who basically said, you're beautiful.
You should be a model.
I want to take your picture, put you in some rap music videos, which he did.
And then he started beating her up and farming her out for sex and threatening to kill her family if she told anybody.
Fortunately, she turned to the FBI. He's in jail.
She's doing a project to help young girls, and we've co-developed this because she read my book.
She said that this really helps me to understand how he did it to me.
Well, and the cult that I was most experienced with helping victims of was a cult called the Children of God, which the leader was Moses David Berg.
And he was a pedophile and he had to leave the U.S. because he was going to be arrested.
And in his cult, he had women be happy hookers for Jesus, and he basically told people they had to have sex with two-year-olds, three-year-olds, four-year-olds.
So it was a sex cult.
And when people would be either kicked out of that cult or run away, my theory is that pimps found them on the streets and started learning from them, the religious terminology, the family, etc., And so sex trafficking.
And then the other thing that is occupying a lot of people's consciousness is terrorist cults like ISIS, Boko Haram, which are trafficking women, by the way.
And they're taking not just weak, stupid people, but, for example, one of the architects of ISIS's social media recruiting network was the Son of an endocrinologist at Mass General Hospital, someone who was raised in Boston, went to a Catholic high school, and unfortunately or fortunately he was killed by a drone strike a few months ago, this kid.
But my heart goes out to them, you know, people who get deceptively recruited and mind-controlled because it happened to me.
And if I hadn't been deprogrammed, I could have done horrible acts of violence.
My gripe about his book and the documentary is that it didn't deal at all with mind control or brainwashing.
It didn't give anyone who was watching the documentary or reading the book tools for how to protect themselves or if they were in a cult to self-reflect and analyze what was happening.
So my rant, Joe, when Wright's book first came out, I did a short video rant.
I said, saying Going Clear is the definitive book on Scientology is like saying you've written a definitive book on cars and leaving out gas combustion engines.
That was what I said.
So I was frustrated, in other words, because you have brilliant people like Paul Haggis, who has an incredible Hollywood career, saying, I was stupid for believing this for 30 years and giving so much money to them.
The group has changed dramatically because of former leaders coming out and speaking out.
The group Anonymous helped a lot initially by wearing masks and saying, come on, let's protest.
It scared them and it created a culture where people were more empowered to speak out against them.
Right now we want the tax exemption to be stripped.
There's no reason in the world we should be subsidizing a group that's paying millions of dollars to harass former members.
That was one of the most disturbing aspects of the movie, when you find out how they achieve tax-exempt status by a litany of lawsuits they propelled against the IRS. And also hiring PIs to dig up dirt on the IRS commissioners, and hiring powerful lobbyists, and it's dirty.
The bottom line is that if there's a totalist group that has a black and white, us versus them, good versus evil, simplistic ideology that says that we have the vision for how the world has to be,
or we have the tools for how to be the best person you can be, One needs to operate with some consumer awareness and say, who is this person?
What is his background?
Is he trustworthy?
And whatever it is, seek critics and ex-members and know that if it's true, it will stand up to scrutiny.
And if it isn't, You know, if it isn't true, why would you want to invest your time and your energy and your money in something that's not real?
Page 111. How can you have more job satisfaction in 1989?
Page 227. Yeah, this was the commercial.
So I bought the book.
I ordered it online.
I don't even remember how I paid.
I guess I had a credit card.
And these fucking people would not stop sending me things.
Right.
I mean, for years, like every week or so, every month or so, whatever it was, I would get something in the mail inviting me to this, inviting me to that.
I mean, it was just amazing how persistent they were.
But it helped a lot of members wake up because they respect you and they got to listen to their divine leader lie.
And it was powerful to hear him say, oh no, I don't tell people to defoo, or I always tell people to go to therapists before they cut off from all their family and friends.
And people knew that that was a blatant lie, and it took a chink out of the mysticism of people who were true believers.
Because you held your own with him.
You know, he didn't, you know, wrap you around his finger as he's used to doing with the followers and their respect for you.
My intention was just to have a conversation with him and trying to figure out what he's doing or what his thought process is.
He's got some really good ideas about things.
It's fascinating.
He's a very eloquent guy and he's very smart, obviously, and he has some really interesting concepts, but he's very firm in his belief about certain things as well to the point where One of the things that I talked to him about, we played a video of him yelling about someone, if you believe in the state, that you want him killed.
You want me killed.
And that you should get rid of all of your friends that believe in the state.
And the idea of anarcho-capitalism or anarchism, like you don't want any government whatsoever.
Who's going to fix the streets?
And there was no answers to those.
Who's going to pay for anything?
Who's going to organize?
This is not a well-thought-out thing.
Someone said it best that he's an incredibly eloquent man that is screaming north while pretending to be holding a compass.
Well, he's another one of those, you know, anti-corporations while he's owning a corporation type people and, you know, saying that he's liberating people and he's in fact enslaving people into a totalistic belief system.
I was hired by a family to consult to help a young man who was getting sucked in, and they were worried that he would try to cut off contact.
And fortunately, he's okay.
So it was a relatively new phenomenon for me, but what was particularly interesting about this particular cult was that he was recruiting over the Internet.
And that's how ISIS is largely recruiting as well.
It's one of the things that I questioned him on because he said that he believed that Robin Williams...
He made a video where saying that Robin Williams killed himself because of all the women that were addicted to free shit, I think is the way he described it.
That these women who were addicted to getting money from him, they sucked him dry.
Robin and I had the same agent.
He was worth millions of dollars when he died.
He was not broke in any way, shape, or form.
He certainly was diminishing in his ability or his ability to earn money was diminishing as he was getting older, but that's just normal for actors.
He had real depression, and he also had Parkinson's, and the Parkinson's medication that he was on, one of the side effects was severe depression.
Also, there's a good friend of mine, Dr. Mark Gordon, who he's done a lot of work with people with traumatic brain injuries.
He wrote a paper on surgery and how people who have undergone large, very traumatic surgeries like Robin had open heart surgery oftentimes experience post-surgery depression.
And that it's a physiological response to your body being under anesthesia for long periods of time.
Plus the physical trauma of the actual surgery itself, the injury and your body's healing.
Especially as you're older, that is a massive task to heal a heart that has been cut open and stitched up and your chest plate has been spread apart.
It's very traumatic.
Physically traumatic and that oftentimes can lead to a diminished state of consciousness and then depression sets in.
Also the reality of mortality sets in on a lot of people.
So I was upset at that because I just didn't understand why he would do that.
But I didn't have that conversation with him.
Like trying to expose him.
I had that conversation with him just to ask him questions.
And then after it was over, that's when all these videos started coming out and that's when I realized that he was deceptive about a few things in the conversation.
Yeah, I was initially fantasizing that you would invite him back and I would be here and then some families who've been cut off from their loved one would be here and we could be like...
You know, dude, tell all your followers to get a therapist and reconnect with their families.
I would say most cult leaders are not cold, calculating con artists.
They're delusional.
They often were victims of mind control themselves and are kind of playing out of...
An identification with the aggressor type scenario.
I don't know enough about him to comment intelligently, but for me it's about wanting people to reclaim their personal power.
And I want to say to anyone who's involved with Molyneux who may be listening to this is...
Take time out.
Step back.
Learn about mind control.
Learn about cults.
Talk to former leaders.
Talk to former members.
Reflect over your own experience.
Ask yourself, when you were first getting involved with Molyneux, what did you think you were getting into?
When you were first getting involved, did you believe you were going to be cutting off from your family, your friends, your life, dropping out of school, turning over your trust funds?
But my impression from him when I first met him is that he's very intelligent.
And oftentimes very intelligent people are frustrated by really stupid people that are around them.
And when he has solutions for a particular...
Yeah.
or particular behavior patterns, he speaks about them very confidently and people become enthralled with that.
And then I think that's a very addictive process, the addictive process of offering solutions, having people praise you for those solutions, and then having people come to you for advice.
And sometimes you get ahead of yourself.
There's momentum in that.
And sometimes you get in front of the wheel and you can't stop it.
And then you're just spouting off about everything.
Like you would do these videos, the truth about this or the truth about that, the truth about people that died.
And you're talking about people that had very complex lives.
They lived a hundred years or whatever the fuck they lived.
And you can't just boil that down into one video.
With very little research, especially when you're doing a hundred other videos a week and you're doing all these interviews and doing podcasts and doing all these things, you're talking about someone's life, man.
You can't say the truth about Lincoln unless you fucking study Lincoln for a long period of time.
And even then, like...
Dan Carlin is my favorite historian.
He doesn't even call himself an historian, but as a podcaster.
He's brilliant in his podcast, Hardcore History.
One of the best things about it, he will offer opposing points of view.
He will say, some people believe that this is what happens.
There's some dispute about this, because it seems to be that certain schools have thought about why this took place.
I think that's super important.
So whenever you start saying the truth about something, like, man, you're just...
You just can't do that, you know?
And that's why the truth about Robin Williams, as a professional stand-up comedian, was particularly offensive to me.
Because I'm like, come on, man.
You know, you're talking about this beloved guy who had this incredibly complex relationship, not just with his ex-wives, but with show business, with life, with depression, with drugs.
Like, this is not something you can just boil down to a one-hour podcast or a one-hour YouTube video and just call the truth about someone.
So I want to mention there's a retired child protective agency social worker named David Coopersen, who wrote a book about corporal punishment, because that's one of Molyneux's claims, etc.
And Coopersen has studied a number of Molyneux videos and the whole ideology.
And he's written a great book, by the way.
It's on StopLegalChildAbuse.com is David's website.
And he just more or less says, as someone who's worked with children who've been traumatized, whether it was beaten by their parents or their foster parents or sexually abused, the best thing is not to cut off contact with the abusive family.
It's to have therapists and to have a healthy frame to work within it and not just to impose from the outside or by some authority figure who says that they know what's better.
For them.
Because even kids who are being abused still have feelings towards their mother or father that are positive because of the way we're wired.
So anyway, I wanted to get a plug-in for his book and the fact that...
And then I wanted to mention Molly Koch.
Molly B. Koch, K-O-C-H dot com, wrote a book on parenting called 27 Secrets to Raising Amazing Children.
And she, too, when I asked her to comment as an expert on parenting about What Molyneux was saying, was saying this is not going to help people to be healthier human beings, to cut off contact from family and friends, no matter what happened in their childhood.
But the best thing is with therapy, and ideally with a family therapist, To approach it to the extent that people are protected so they're not further abused by their family of origin.
Well, this seems very black and white to me because if you're coming from an incredibly abusive family and your family was brutal and they beat you and they did horrible things to you, which I know people have come from, I think cutting them off is a great idea.
So you think if your father sexually abused you, rapes you, beats you up, comes home in an alcoholic rage and breaks your skull, you should still call that guy?
So what I'm trying to say, Joe, as a therapist, and I've seen these situations, I'm also involved with parental alienation cases where there's a divorce and the custodial parent brainwashes the children against the father or against the mother, which is horrendous.
People can grow.
People can change.
People can evolve.
Whatever is, also there's false memory syndrome where people were getting with not good therapists or using hypnosis or getting into cults and being like I was, believing I had this horrible childhood.
Just cutting off and saying I can't ever talk with them again is not a healthy choice in my opinion.
Being with an ethical therapist and finding a way to evaluate what's happening with them and getting them into treatment and then potentially to have some type of family therapy situation.
If it's not going to be helpful ultimately, then of course, don't revictimize yourself.
Don't allow yourself to continue to be abused.
But this kind of This notion of lopping off your father, your mother, your sister, your brother because they were shitty to you 20 years ago or 40 years ago I think is a mistake as a therapist.
But there are gotta be scenarios where you shouldn't be hanging out with your brother because your brother used to rape you or your brother used to beat you up.
Why have any contact with someone who horribly abused you?
Just because they're family?
Would you do that to a friend?
So this idea that blood and DNA somehow or another make you inexorably connected to some person that was horribly abusive to you.
If you had a friend that you grew up with and your friend used to rape you and beat the fuck out of you, are you supposed to still contact them because they were your friend and they'll always be in your life?
So, for example, I mean, when they were in, for example, a cult like the Children of God, they weren't thinking that their father and mother were raping them and their aunt and their uncle were raping them, but they were having abusive sex.
That was not something that they were ready for or wanted to have and it hurt, etc.
Now they're out.
And for me to just say, look, you know, cut off all contact and assume there's no possibility that they could grow, they can change, they could evolve, they could apologize, they could make it up to you.
For me, that's not the ideal.
It's not what my position as a healer, as someone who's worked with so many other people.
Now what I'm not saying is, If you've been hurt by someone, to just call them up and then have them hurt you.
I'm not saying that.
I'm saying use professionals as mediators to see what's possible in terms of constructive, healthy change.
I guess I'm not meaning to sound so absolute, and every case should be evaluated individually, but I do have, I guess I've had too many cases where it was this kind of total cutoff.
Maybe the person really, you know, got great therapy and they are incredibly remorseful and they want to apologize and they're a decent human being.
You can keep carrying the pain and the judgment and say, no, I'll never talk with you again, or try to accept them for where they are now and see whether or not they're going to be beneficial to your ongoing therapy.
I think everyone ultimately has to take responsibility for their own lives and their own actions.
I mean, I felt terrible for a lot of the things that I did in the Moonies, and I did my best to reach out to people I had recruited who I Whose lives I had interfered with.
And it was a burden for many, many years as long as they continue to be in the group.
And they're all out now, but virtually no one wants to talk with me.
I think they still harbor really bad feelings towards me.
Wow, that's got to be so strange for you to be in the position that you're in now, to have these people that look at you as someone who victimized them in the very way you're trying to shield people from today.
I am too, but I also believe there's some people that are just beyond fucked up, and there's nothing you can do about them.
It's not a bad idea to cut them off.
I know a lot of people have cut their parents off, and they're very happy because of it, because their parents were evil, and their parents are fucked up.
I mean, and every time they would be with them or communicate with them would just be incredibly damaging, and they would have to deal with it for months on end, and the stress and the pain were just not worth it.
And ultimately, they felt better to forgive that person, but not communicate with them.
I guess I have more of the Jewish angle on forgiveness.
Like, I don't believe in forgiving people who don't apologize and don't offer compensation and don't promise never to do it again and then never do it again.
That's kind of the Jewish formula.
Only then is the person who is wrong in a position to forgive.
But I'm not of the thing of just forgive.
But I guess I think ultimately the more sense of fullness, of wholeness, of knowing that we do everything that's within our power, our sphere of influence to do, to be a good person, to bring goodness to the planet, is the way to operate.
And I think that For me, with my father, he didn't beat me, but he didn't hug me.
He didn't, you know, give me a lot of praise when I was growing up, because his father never gave him that.
And instead of, when I was in therapy, instead of being angry at him, me stepping into his shoes as a child, realizing he was doing the best that he could.
And at 30, I just, when I saw him, I just started Hugging him and he'd be like a board.
And I'd just say, stand there because I need a hug.
And by the time he was in his 80s, he was actually wanting the hug.
Took 50 years?
Yeah.
Yeah, it took 50 years.
He actually said, I love you and I'm proud of you.
And I had a relatively normal, boring in many ways, because they didn't smoke, they didn't drink, they didn't have affairs.
I lived in the same house.
I wasn't moving all over.
I wasn't a child of divorce.
But I guess I want to just come back to everyone needs to kind of be in touch with their inner voice, their inner intuition.
And instead of holding a frozen frame in their mind of what happened 30 years ago and just keeping that, I can't be with him because of that, find out what's going on.
And I'm not saying put yourself in a position where you can be harmed, but you can use third parties to find out what's going on there.
And there could be some really radical positive changes that happen that could be a really good thing.
There's a certain degree of abuse that I think some parents have enacted on their children.
There was a story that someone told me recently about this brother that was raping his sister, and this went on for years, and then the dad found out about it, and the dad joined in.
And this went on for more years.
Those people can both go fuck themselves.
If I was that girl, and if I knew that girl, I would tell them to never contact them.
Never talk to them.
There's no need.
Just because they're your blood, that doesn't mean anything.
That's nonsense.
You know, you can have family that's not related to you, the people that you love and trust, and if you treat them like their family, they'll treat you like family, too.
I think you choose the people that you can be in contact with, and that's the problem that a lot of people have with this whole idea of family, is that you're born into them.
It's like you just get a random hand of cards.
You know, and that's your family.
And you just have to accept that for the rest of your life.
And then when they fuck up, you have to keep trying to forgive them or help them or bring them together.
Or not.
I say not.
I say with certain people like that girl whose brother and dad raped her, there's no fucking need to bring those people into your life.
If you can get away from them, stay away from them.
Hopefully they're in jail now.
I don't know what happened in that particular situation, but...
I grew up with a father that beat the fuck out of my mother, and I saw it a bunch of times when I was little.
I was five years old and my mom left, so these images are very old and they're very distorted, but they're 100% real.
There's certain things that were undeniable about the physical abuse.
And I have had no desire to talk to that person ever since.
And I don't ever want to.
I don't need it.
You know, this idea of blood, that this person had sex with my mom and made me, that I have to forgive this dummy and spend time with him and try to work out why he beat the fuck out of my mom in front of me.
My point of view as a therapist who's seen literally hundreds and hundreds of different cases and people can change.
I also want to come back to the false memory point because there's a lot of people who went into therapy or they got into a cult and they came to have the belief that they were in a satanic cult or they were beaten and tortured by By their family and it's not true,
but they're still acting as if it is and there's no effort to reality test, to actually talk to the siblings or talk with the neighbors or Most sexual predators have multiple victims.
They're usually not just enacting on one particular person.
And what I've been saying from the beginning is, you know, find a good therapist who's experienced with trauma and sexual abuse and such and do your process and consider I think there are hundreds.
It was one of the more disturbing parts of going clear was seeing the people that were just emotionally devastated by the fact their family wouldn't talk to them anymore because they had been excommunicated.
Right, so this disconnection, the JWs call it disfellowshipping, it's a common mind control technique to manipulate people to cut them off from family and friends if people are breaking rules or questioning the authority, etc.
It's not something that should be done by any legitimate religion, certainly not any legitimate organization, telling people you can't talk to your sister, your brother, your mother, your father, because some authority figure says God doesn't want it or that you've violated the rules.
And in the mind of Scientologists, if you leave, you're going to go insane, you're going to commit suicide, you're going to become a drug addict.
And they put phobias in members' minds against any mental health professional.
So if you're feeling suicidal, if you're having major migraines, only do auditing, only do Scientology techniques.
And at the point that, I think it was Paul Haggis that refused to refute his gay daughter when he learned that Scientology came out against the bill in California.
That was his wake-up call because his love for his daughter trumped the cult ideology.
But the speculation is that they have some dirt on him.
The speculation is that through the auditing process or the files that they keep on you, that was what they implied in the documentary, that they have these stacks of files on weird massages.
They said that in the Time Magazine cover story in 1990. There's a huge amount of fear and threat that if you leave the group or speak out against the group, they're going to come after you and ruin your life.
Unfortunately, a lot of people have fear.
For me and other people who've left, you kind of have to rise above it and say, screw you.
I'm not going to live like that.
Go and tell whatever you want to tell, but screw you.
That's programmed into the Scientology identity that you have this higher truth, that you understand the nature of reality, that a certain technique is going to work.
But what we know from the placebo effect, the power of authority and the power of suggestion is what's happening here.