Adam Carolla joins Joe Rogan to dissect the organic podcast network, where Rogan’s guests like Doug Benson and UFC’s Brock Lesnar (4.6-second 40-yard dash at 290 lbs) cross-pollinate audiences—unlike corporate radio. Rogan slams mainstream media for ignoring wars (e.g., Iraq’s million+ deaths) while obsessing over Lindsay Lohan or royal weddings, exposing propaganda like Hearst/DuPont’s 1930s anti-marijuana campaigns tied to racial violence. He mocks hypocrites like Alabama politician Robert Watson ("traitor" to humanity) and debates transgender inclusion in jiu-jitsu classes amid viral McDonald’s altercations. The episode ends with Rogan’s frustration over desensitization to online brutality, teasing Lesnar’s potential rematch and Duncan Trussell’s May 27 appearance—while promoting The Fleshlight as a "soul-crushing" (but effective) sex toy sponsor. [Automatically generated summary]
I've done Doug Benson's and Duncan Trussell's and Duncan will be on the show tomorrow at 3 o'clock.
You know, and I did Marc Marins, and I'm going to do Eddie F and Jim Jeffries.
It's like doing all these podcasts, it's like, you know, it's like there's this cool network of radio stations that's happening organically, you know, instead of like Bubba the Love Sponge and, you know, the Pharrell Show all being, you know, stuffed into one thing by a corporation, like everybody's kind of found themselves and become like this network sort of organically.
You know, it's cool, you know, like, Fans of one will hear about the other, you know, like Duncan Trussell got some fans when, you know, he came and did this podcast and I came and did his and, you know, we, you know, share each other's listeners and stuff.
It's really a fucking, a very unique thing, you know, this podcast thing.
And as we said, it probably wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for Adam, you know, him and also Anthony Cumia from Opie and Anthony.
Because Anthony was doing that live from the compound thing.
These fucking guys are running around with sandals on in the mountains.
And, you know, we got drones flying overhead, taking pictures of them, shooting missiles and...
Hundreds of thousands, who knows how many thousands of fucking soldiers over there.
Who's the bad guy?
I don't know.
It gets a little fucking blurry.
I don't know.
They're evil terrorists and they're attacking the Americans.
What are we doing over there?
You think you can just come into someone's neighborhood and they don't fucking shoot at you?
You can't just take over.
You know, when you take over, people fight back.
And when they fight back, well, who's the fucking bad guy?
Is it some kid who was born in Afghanistan and this is all he knows?
And this is the neighborhood he grew up in?
And all of a sudden he sees these fucking helicopters fly overhead and tanks rolling around the ground?
What would you think?
You think you're being invaded?
Who's the bad guy?
It's very, very tricky, man.
I mean, I obviously never would want anything bad to happen to any of our troops overseas.
But I also don't want them to do anything bad to all these fucking people either.
The whole thing's a clusterfuck.
Who knows how many people have become terrorists because of all the shit that we've done overseas?
Who knows how many people lost family members?
Who knows how many people who would have been sort of a moderate person who really wouldn't get into this kind of stuff got drawn into it because of tragedy, got drawn into it because of either someone they know or they get to watch video footage.
When you're dealing with shit like what's going on in Iraq, there's like a million dead people over there.
Over the course of the nine years of this war, whatever it's been, a million people have died.
That's an insane number of people.
I mean, if you stacked a million bodies up in the middle of Washington State Park and had everybody look, here's everyone that's died in Iraq.
Maybe then it would sink in.
Maybe then people would really kind of realize how crazy war is.
In fact, this is really how we have to do things in 2011. You know what's crazy is that I didn't know about that.
People love that shit, because people love gossip.
The news has become like People magazine.
I mean, when you're talking about two wars going on, plus Libya, plus actions in Pakistan with drones, there's a lot of crazy shit going on every fucking day of the week.
A lot of it.
If you're hearing anything at all about Lindsay Lohan, and she hasn't killed 50 people, I know.
Do you think that that is because the networks are trying to make the easiest to digest sort of program after people are tired from work and just give the dummies what they want?
Is it because the dummies want this or it's because that's the only thing that's on the air?
Do they have a mentality that people are dumb and in pushing all this Lindsay Lohan shit?
Look, here's the thing, man.
I can get into it, too.
I understand it.
I mean, I don't judge people.
Mrs. Rogan likes the gossip magazine sometimes.
She likes reading about things every now and then.
And I make fun of it.
I make fun of it.
But if I'm taking a shit, I'll start reading it.
And I'll start reading it.
Damn, he just left her like that?
And what is she doing?
Oh man, she's fucking that guy now?
Whoa, this is crazy.
And now she's got a baby, I bet he's mad.
It's easy.
We have instincts to gossip and we have instincts to follow silly fucking stories in the news, whether it's about the princess or especially when it's royalty.
That's when it's so squirrely.
It's like that prince, that guy doesn't do shit.
He doesn't do shit.
He's a prince.
I mean, he hasn't done anything.
He hasn't been elected.
He hasn't written some awesome books that everybody loves.
This guy's only famous because he's a prince.
I mean, that's just fucking completely insane.
When you get into royalty, it's the ultimate form of celebrity.
Yeah, but she's now making millions and millions and millions of dollars, and then you have these girls working like Jenna Hayes that's not making millions and millions and millions of dollars, and she pretty much does the same shit, but even better.
But it is a weird thing, though, that you're allowed to do it as long as you at least claim that you did it on accident, that it got released on accident.
But if we suspect that you put it out on purpose, you actually made your own sex video and released it?
I think it's pretty easy to get a video out nowadays because I've been realizing how many recordings now I've made of myself that I just accidentally tweet.
The other day, I accidentally tweeted something that I thought was a direct message out to everybody.
And then there was one point where she went to stand up and she fell and did like a back So wait a minute, you've known this chick for a while, man, and that's the only time you've ever talked to her about molestation?
And the idea that you're going to have this crazy running drama every day and what's going to happen and she comes home and finds him with her and every day there's drama and crazy music and What a weird way to live, man.
It seems like there's a lot of shit going on there and electricity and it's heat.
And anytime there's heat, I say you got to get the best thing because you don't want things burning through the fucking cord and blowing up in your house or whatever some cheap piece of shit would do.
Yeah.
Just get the stuff that's going to work.
That volcano thing...
What we're talking about is a vaporizer.
And what vaporizing is, ladies and gentlemen, is for the health-conscious amongst us, the stoners that don't want any of those bad, nasty bits that you take in from burning smoke, which apparently is not nearly as bad for you as tobacco smoke, but it's got to be somewhat bad for you.
It's just smoke.
I mean, I don't know.
It has some health benefits.
It's an expectorant, and apparently it's very good for people when they have asthma.
People who have asthma, at least some of them, have reported that they have a benefit from smoking the pot.
But what the vaporizer does is, it cuts out all the health problems.
It heats it up, but doesn't burn it.
And it blows air through it, and it releases this THC mist.
And that is collected...
In one of these.
And what this is, you hear it, iTunes folks, it's a plastic bag.
At the end of it, it has this little nozzle.
And you just suck out the pure THC. And if you suck out enough, you can see aliens.
And by the way, the Volcano, I've tried every single kind of vaporizer known to man, and the Volcano is the only one that I recommend.
If you're going to get one, get the Volcano, because that shit works.
Where the other ones, you're trying to adjust the temperature right, and sometimes it feels like you're not getting anything, then other times it's like you've got too much dark smoke for some reason.
You know, the only reason why all this shit costs so much is because it's illegal.
It's the only reason.
The only reason everything costs so much is because it's illegal.
Marijuana should be cheap as fuck.
It's a plant.
It's easy to grow.
It's a goddamn weed.
It doesn't even get sick.
It doesn't rot.
You know, you ever look at some trees and there's all these bugs fucking them up?
Bugs don't fuck up, reefer.
Step back, bitch!
You don't even have a chance.
Bugs don't have a chance.
Reefer doesn't need pesticides.
People always say, what happened if they put pesticides in your weed, man?
You can get DDT poisoning, bro.
That's what's wrong with weed.
No, you don't need it.
It doesn't need pesticides.
It doesn't get sick.
It's not like all these pussy-ass plants.
It's one of the toughest plants that's ever existed.
It's the best fiber.
The fiber that you make out of hemp, like when you make hemp jeans or clothes or...
It's like so much more sturdy than cotton.
And the paper, like hemp paper, is so superior to cotton.
It all became illegal.
Most people don't even know this, but it became illegal back when they figured out a more effective way to process the hemp fiber.
It was legal forever, but it became like something that people stopped using because cotton became so much more easy to process.
They came up with the cotton gin.
And instead of just having slaves pick the cotton, which was a huge pain in the ass, then they could run it through this fucking machine and it made it way easier.
And so people were like, fuck this hemp.
Because hemp fiber is like really tough stuff.
And you got to break it down.
Have you ever watched like manual breaking down of hemp fiber?
It's a laborious process, man.
Because the fucking stalk of this plant...
This is like an animal...
Or an alien plant, rather.
It's an incredible plant.
The fiber is super fucking tough and strong.
You make the best rope out of it.
The best cloth out of it.
It's so superior.
But it takes a long time to turn that fiber into cloth or paper.
It's really difficult to break down.
And then, in the early 1930s...
A guy came out with a machine called a decorticator.
And what the decorticator did...
Was allow them to process it just like the cotton gin processes cotton, allows it to smash it down into this pulp and make it much more usable, like almost immediately.
And then that's when they said, fuck this.
And that's when pot became illegal.
Pot became illegal entirely because of hemp, which has nothing to do with the psychoactive properties.
It became illegal because of William Randolph Hearst, who was running newspapers, and he also had paper mills, and they were going to make people start using hemp paper.
That was going to be the shit because you could take a forest full of trees and you chop them down.
Well, you're fucked because you don't have any more trees.
It takes a long-ass time for those trees to grow back.
But hemp?
You grow it every four months.
You'd have a new fucking crop.
I mean, you could use the same property over and over and over again.
It's renewable.
You get much more paper.
So this motherfucker was going to have to spend millions of dollars.
So them and DuPont, William Randolph Hearst and DuPont, they got together and they said, hey, we'll fucking say that pot makes blacks and Mexicans rape white chicks.
And that's all they did.
That's what they did.
That's literally what they did.
They started printing stories, William Randolph Hearst did in the paper, of this new drug called marijuana.
And what marijuana was had nothing even to do with pot.
The original name for marijuana was a slang for a wild Mexican tobacco.
So they call it marijuana and then say blacks and Mexicans are smoking marijuana.
So when Congress made hemp illegal, when they made marijuana illegal, they didn't even know they were making hemp illegal as well.
They fucked everybody.
And they did it in 19-fucking-30-something.
It's amazing that that shit is still going on.
It's still illegal in the age of the internet, where all the information is at your disposal.
Everything.
You can Google search every fucking study ever done on pot, and you can see right away that most people want it legal.
Who's stopping it?
Oh, people with money.
Why are they stopping it?
Well, because they're making money on marijuana being illegal.
And they're using that money, they're bribbing politicians, and that's how they keep it in place.
Fuck, really?
In 2011, you can be that open, it's that open, where you can see so clearly?
It's so sick, man.
It's sick.
It's sick that we live like this.
It's sick that you can put people in jail for wanting to smoke a joint and kick back and listen to some good music and Eat some food and have some great conversation with friends and not hurt anybody.
And yet cops can come and lock you up in a fucking cage for that.
It's ridiculous.
We know what drugs are bad, folks.
We know.
We have to stop letting people tell you that the drugs that are good are bad because they're fucking wrong.
There's ones that are bad.
Don't do meth.
Don't do heroin.
Or if you do, you gotta be a musician or something.
He flew through the air and landed on his head, and he was still conscious.
And he climbed on top of the guy and still got the pin.
And you watch it, if you watch it, you watch him do that, and you go, that's supposed to kill people.
How did that not kill him?
Like, who is this guy?
How the fuck did that guy survive that?
It's supposed to snap your neck and break every fucking bone in your spinal column.
It's supposed to be just chaos for you after that.
Meanwhile, he finishes the match.
It's ridiculous.
So he was already this guy where people were like, this Brock Lesnar guy, man.
You ain't never seen a heavyweight move like that guy.
You know, we had heard about his fucking times and that was like one of the things they talked about during his wrestling days was his times in the NFL Combine.
You know, the NFL Combine is, you know, it's like, I actually can pull up the numbers because it's so ridiculous.
It's worth reading.
But the NFL combine is when they take athletes and they, you know, they run them through these tests like the 40 yard and you know, see how fat Let me find it real quick here I was gonna say something I am completely stoned now Brock and Shane, here it is Yeah, let me read this to you right here This is his crazy fucking numbers The 40-yard sprint.
4.6 seconds.
He's 290-something pounds, okay?
4.6 seconds.
That's like eight times faster than you can do.
I mean, stop and think about that.
40 yards, 4.6 seconds.
That's a fast 40. 225-pound bench press, 43 repetitions.
43 of 225. What the fuck?
His vertical jump, 35 inches.
His broad jump, 10 feet.
He hurls 300 pounds, 10 feet through the fucking air.
That's ridiculous shit, dude.
That's a freak.
So we had heard about that shit when he was around.
We'd heard about that long ago.
And so when I heard that he was going to go into MMA, I was like, holy...
I was there for his first fight.
I saw his first fight live.
It was at LA at the Coliseum.
It was for K-1.
Took this fucking dude down and just smashed him.
And I remember looking at that going, who's going to fuck with that?
Like, that's a dangerous motherfucker.
Some freaky guy who can get on top of you and just punch your brains in.
And try stomping it.
Good luck.
Of course, you know, Cain Velasquez eventually did stop it, but he was another freak specimen.
Meaning like Alabama, but it is back then in time as well.
That's really what it is.
I'm saying back then because I'm thinking of it as being in the 50s.
I should have said back there, but back then is more appropriate.
They live in a fucking time warp.
Stupid ass place where you can get fucking arrested.
Oh, do you hear about the Rhode Island guy?
Here's another one.
I love hearing about politicians who get fucked up.
This guy who was a anti-marijuana House Minority Leader Robert Watson, he was arrested for alcohol and drug charges.
They pull homeboy over and he failed the field sobriety test.
So then they grabbed him and they searched his pockets and they find out he's got a plastic bag filled with pot and a wooden pipe.
So this fucking dummy, who is this anti-pot guy, It gets busted with pot.
And that, to me, that's like a gay guy who's secretly gay who votes against gay marriage.
They should be locked up.
You're like a traitor.
You're like a traitor for humanity.
You're a bad person.
If you really want to lock people in jail for pot and yet you enjoy pot...
You're a shitty human being.
You're willing to put your own personal gain ahead of the betterment of the people.
You're willing to take something that you know is not right and push it because you think more people are going to agree with you because it's the contemporary opinion.
You know?
That's a really shitty human being.
That guy, you know, I hope that guy is ostracized from the political community for life.
I hope they never allow him back.
And it's sad, but they probably will.
He'll probably eventually show up somewhere else and apologize or become a Christian or something stupid and they'll suck him right back in.
Enough people will believe in him that he'll get some shitty job in some shitty little fucking community where they won't bother Google searching what a douchebag he is.
How much I've gotten over the impact of those things.
It used to be, I would watch that and it would haunt my dreams.
Like the first time I ever saw Faces of Death, and I realized these are really bodies.
Like Faces of Death, some of the Faces of Death were, I don't know if it was exactly Faces of Death, but one of those type of videos, I remember one of them was super disturbing.
It was in some Middle Eastern country where they were killing a guy by tying him in between two trucks and pulling him apart.
I think the best movie for you ever is if they made a horror movie, kind of like a Friday the 13th, but it was Friday the 13th, but the porn mixed in with it.
Brian, you're going to give me a bad reputation with these lies.
I don't think that's cool, man.
Poor friends.
You can't just fucking put shit like this.
And next thing you know, be on my Wikipedia page.
That's the next thing on the Wikipedia page.
I'm not saying that you should put in that during the Twilight days, Joe Rogan often said that he was a werewolf.
I'm not saying you should put that on there.
But if it's on there, I ain't hating.
You know what I'm saying?
I ain't mad at you.
I'm already on some man shit, you know, because when Daryl Wright said that, you're on some man shit, I somehow or another said something about putting it on Wikipedia, and apparently it's up there, man.
Yeah, I might be doing a show at a pot shop in Toronto on Thursday night too, Tripoli and I. There's apparently some underground pot thing going on in Toronto and they have shows there.