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Dec. 31, 2020 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:05:49
20201231_TJDS_12312020_Podcast
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy Dore.
This is Joe Biden.
Oh, hey there, Mr. President-elect.
How the hell are you?
That's my line.
How the hell are you?
I'm doing well.
Thanks for asking.
How are you?
I'm doing great.
Seriously, I'm ACES.
And I am looking forward to a great 2020.
Yeah, let's hope.
Do you have any New Year's resolutions?
Nah, not really.
I usually don't do that sort of thing.
But I guess you could say that I'm resolved that on January 20th, Tomorrow Harris and I are going to take the oath of office and get to work immediately on healing the divide in this nation.
Bringing the two halves back together again.
Fusing them with the blowtorch of liberty.
The soldering iron of justice.
So that they are again one.
I see.
Okay.
That and to stop eating paper.
What?
That's just an old nervous habit of mine.
I tear off his old piece of paper and I roll them into a ball and I chew on them until they're all pulpy.
And then I swallow them.
Oh, that's weird.
Yeah, it's sort of bizarre.
You know, a little bit's fine, but lately it's been sort of ramped up.
And I branch out into colored paper because at this point, my palate is so developed that I can taste differences.
Apparently, the dyes are, you know, for the coloring, you know, it can be toxic, Jimmy.
Yeah, stop doing that, please.
And I go to my doctor and he says, my doctor says, stop eating paper.
Right.
He says, damn it, Joe, you're going to die from eating paper.
So I've tried to cut down.
Oh, that's good.
But Kamala, you know, she's such a card.
She's so funny.
We'll be in a transition meeting.
A meeting for the transition.
And so she'll quietly tear off a piece of paper and roll it into a little ball.
And then she'll roll the ball over to me.
As if to say, here, Joe, eat some paper.
And I do.
This is insane.
Yeah.
I know.
So I'm going to go cold turkey the first year.
She really is a card.
She says to me, Kamala says to me, Joe, your administration is going to be the best two years this country has seen in a long time.
And then she points her finger right at my heart.
Jesus Christ.
So the joke there is, you know, the presidential administration is four years, not two.
And she says it was such a straight face.
Her delivery is so deadban.
Joe.
Joe, you need to tell the Secret Service that she's trying to poison you.
Yeah, they're too busy trying to figure out who cut the brake line on my town car.
Excuse me?
We almost crashed into a Chipotle.
It was wild, Jack.
Mr. Biden, I'm getting the sense that you may be in danger.
Jimmy, I can't afford to live my life in fear.
And I am not afraid.
Do you know why?
No, no, why?
Because I have lost cognitive function to the point where I can no longer perceive danger.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
Mr. Biden, please.
I gotta go, Jimmy.
Someone anonymously left me an assortment of chocolates here in my office.
And I'm gonna go take a bite out of each one until I get to the Marzipan.
Joe, no!
Establishment media sets of artists fighting.
So good luck.
Watch and see as a jack-off comedian who speeds and jumps the medium and hits him head-on.
It's the Jimmy Door show.
Hey, welcome to this week's Jimmy Door show.
Let's get to the jokes before we get to the joke, shall we?
Did you know, Gallant?
California Governor Gavin Newsom just announced plans for reopening the state schools in February.
Great, just in time for the deadly post Groundhog's Day surge.
I predict Wonder Woman will do for women what Wonder Bread did for our digestion.
Hey, we're going to lose anyway, so why try?
Isn't a strategy.
It's a suicide note.
Buy more Bitcoin today.
Hey, due to the dramatic rise in COVID cases, the Department of Public Health is requiring anyone returning to Los Angeles County to quarantine for 10 days and write a screenplay about it.
Los Angeles hospitals are so crowded, they're now turning away ambulances.
Remember the good old days when they used to turn away ambulances because people couldn't pay?
If I had a dime for every time I've been gaslighted and ghosted by not the right timers, I would have had enough money to afford a health care plan that they're paying for.
Hey, what's coming up on today's show?
Forcing a vote for Medicare for All is what the progressive movement needs to do in this moment.
Will they do it?
The answer just may surprise you.
Or will it?
Ludicrous arguments against force the vote.
We take down some of the more ludicrous of the ludicrous arguments.
Plus, Washington Post journalists confronted by the Jimmy Dore show over their dishonest smears of the Jimmy Door show.
Plus, DNC election interference has been exposed in the new revelations over the Iowa primary.
We talked to the investigative journalists from the intercept, Jordan Sheraton.
Plus, phone calls from Joe Biden, Bernie Sanders, and George Clooney.
A lot lot more.
That's today on the Jimmy Door Show.
You know what I say?
If not now, when?
Getting a vote for Medicare for All is not performative.
Getting a vote for Medicare for All is not symbolism.
Getting a vote for Medicare for All is not destined to fail.
And right now, Democrats have a tiny margin in the House around six to seven seats.
The small margin of votes the progressive members have gives them an extraordinary amount of leverage.
The Speaker of the House is who decides what legislation gets voted on.
That's who decides.
The vote for House speakership is happening January 3rd.
Nancy Pelosi is preventing Medicare for All from getting a vote.
Medicare for All has a majority approval in the nation.
Medicare for All has an 80% approval rating among Democrats.
Progressives now have the leverage to get health care for Americans during a pandemic and beyond.
No vote for Nancy Pelosi as speaker unless she promises to put Medicare for all on the House floor for a vote.
What would grow the Medicare for All movement more than an actual debate in Congress?
What would galvanize more support for Medicare for All than having a vote on the national stage?
What would mobilize the American people to fight for their own interests more than fighting their health care providers in the middle of a pandemic?
More than 15 million people have lost their health care during this crisis.
That is 15 million more people added to the 80 million people who were already uninsured or underinsured.
It's like a third of the country now.
This is no longer a political question.
The politics are set.
This is a moral question.
I'm not asking people to cancel AOC or the squad.
I'm saying that if they don't do everything possible to make this Medicare for all vote happen, they are canceling us.
Millions of our fellow Americans are suffering without health care right now.
Their suffering is not performative.
Their suffering is not symbolic.
There's not going to be a better time to address their suffering.
You dismiss Medicare for All as performative.
You're allowing this to be defeated before it even happens.
You don't win the war if you never go into battle.
Yes, I want progressive politicians to put their careers on the line.
Yes, I want them to put their lives on the line.
I want them to fight for the lives of the people that put faith, blood, sweat, money, and hope into them, getting them power in the first place.
We want them to use the power we gave them.
FDR said this needs to happen.
Now make me do it.
Right now, we're going through that phase where people are making this fight about me.
I get it.
Get past this phase and make it about the people suffering without health care.
We got to put our egos aside, including me.
Fight for what is bigger than us.
Millions of Americans are counting on us.
Millions of Americans are counting on us.
The corporate overlords and oligarchs understand turning crisis into opportunity.
They do it every time.
They did it this time, too.
This is an opportunity handed to us on a silver platter.
Medicare for all is low-hanging fruit, the most popular policy in the nation, the most needed policy in the nation.
This is no time to be docile.
This is a moral crisis.
I understand people feel protective of their favorite politicians, politicians that we have invested our hope into.
But now we are becoming a movement that follows politicians instead of a movement that makes politicians follow the people.
We got to make the politicians follow us.
The progressives who rightly mocked Hillary Clinton for calling Medicare for all a pony have now become Hillary Clinton.
You got, you ain't going to have it for 15 years.
You can't do it that way.
We got to wait.
To the eggheads trying to deflate this momentum, this is not an either-or thing.
Yes, you can demand chair assignments too.
Yes, demand more.
Yes, this is the time to demand stuff.
All I'm asking of House Representatives and the progressive movement is to have courage.
If the progressive caucus simply took down Nancy Pelosi from her speakership, that's exercising power.
And when you exercise a muscle, it grows stronger.
Power is also a muscle.
Exercise it.
Don't let them tell you that you're powerless.
You're not powerless.
We are not powerless.
We are powerful right now.
We have all the power.
No vote for Nancy Pelosi as speaker unless we get the Medicare for all vote on the floor.
And then, guess what?
That's only the beginning of the battle.
We get the vote on the floor and then we fight like hell.
Hashtag force the vote, force the vote.org.
Go to force the vote.org and sign that petition.
We had a breaking news story.
I'm going to bring on our guest.
You guys know everybody knows him.
Our next guest, investigative reporter, formerly of MSNBC.
What?
I didn't know that.
I knew he was and the young jerks.
He is host of his YouTube channel, The Status Coup.
He has written a revealing article for the intercept about the corruption of the DNC and how it affected the 2020 primary.
It is Jordan Sheritan.
Hey, Jordan.
Hey, Jimmy, thanks for having me.
All right.
So we cut when this happened, when they were trying to count the vote in Iowa, we covered it, right?
And we said this is DNC messing around.
And we got flagged.
If you tried to share that story on Facebook, this is what Facebook would tell you.
This is a false information in this post.
Independent fact checkers at lead stories say this post has false information.
And they said the false information was that the DNC had anything to do with the voting and the screw-up in Iowa.
And so we exposed that the guy who fact-checked this worked for CNN.
And so, you know, it was garbage.
Remember, Facebook can tell you what is and what isn't news.
Okay.
Also, if you need relationship advice, call the geek squad.
Anyway, Pete, here it is.
By the way, the chief communications person for Facebook used to be with the Driple C. Of course.
It's a big club and you ain't in it.
So, Pete, here it is.
So you remember Pete Budega.
He claimed victory in Iowa before the results were in.
That was a hell of a routine he did, that claiming victory.
But here it is.
Investigator DNC was directly involved in Iowa caucus app development, countering The DNC denial.
So they had this app.
They developed an app.
All of a sudden, they need an app to count the votes.
They've been counting the votes since 1776, but all of a sudden, now we need an app.
We needed to develop an app before this primary specifically.
And, well, Pete, well, here it is.
First of all, Pete was the first candidate to do shady things in 2020.
He's like the hipster of cheating.
So in a closed session, Iowa State Democrats meeting, members pushed for the answers of the DNC's role in the caucus debacle.
And that's, this is your article.
So from the article, it says the Democratic National Committee refused to cooperate with investigators and was directly involved in the development process of the shadow app ahead of the 2020 cut.
Isn't it amazing, Jordan, that the DNC can just not cooperate with investigators?
Hey, can we see your servers?
No.
Hey, can we look into this app?
No, fuck off.
Isn't that kind of amazing?
Well, when the chief attorney investigating was a former U.S. prosecutor appointed by President Obama, yeah, they could easily not respond.
I mean, most people don't realize, Jimmy, the DNC is a private corporation.
It's not a governmental body.
So they don't have any regulations that would mandate them to cooperate.
But it's quite interesting to have an investigation where you're investigating possible fraud by the DNC and you don't talk to the DNC.
You don't get their emails, text messages, phone calls, quite the investigation.
Wow.
So the person investigating was an Obama appointee?
Correct.
Oh, well, that guy's not going to be biased at all.
Okay, well, here it is.
The DNC was directly involved in the development process, the development of the app.
That's what that's what that said.
Nicholas Klinfelt, Kleinfeldt, a former federal attorney appointed by President Obama in a meeting.
Kleinfeld's revelation about the committee's involvement counters the DNC's claim it made immediately after the Iowa caucuses.
Back then, the DNC claimed it had absolutely no involvement in the development or coding of the shadow app, which was supposed to record and report caucus results.
And they also had no involvement in the 2016 primary either, just so you know.
The DNC mandated several, as mandated several-day delay in reporting results, led Buddha gig to infamously declare victory without any actual results released, despite Sanders winning the popular vote.
The mainstream media elevated the former South Bend Indiana mayor's victory narrative, boosting him in the polls for the New Hampshire primary where Bernie still won.
Now, attorneys looked at financial records and contacts between Shadow Inc.
So Shadow Inc.
is this organization that developed this app, but the Shadow Inc.
is populated by a bunch of ex-like Clinton workers, right?
Go ahead.
Veterans of Hillary Clinton's 2016 campaign created Shadow, and they were the primary drivers behind the app being used for the Iowa caucus.
That's just, that just doesn't seem right that the Shadow app would be developed by Hillary Clinton cronies.
That just, especially after 2016, was revealed to be completely fraudulent toward the primary because Hillary Clinton was against the rules.
I don't know if it was illegal, but it certainly was against the charter of the DNC that she was running the DNC, why Debbie Washerman Shields was saying that they were neutral, when in fact, Hillary Clinton's staff and her campaign was running the DNC, meaning they were making all the decisions about what press releases got released, when the debates were, all that stuff as Hillary Clinton campaign was made.
And then we've got that got revealed.
And so you would think they wouldn't let the people who worked with Hillary Clinton take over the counting for the next primary, but they did.
Well, if you remember, Jimmy, it was so bad in 2016 that even Politico called it money laundering, this Hillary victory fund between Hillary Clinton's campaign, the DNC, that they were basically bending the rules to take money that was meant for the state Democratic parties and to funnel it back to Hillary Clinton's campaign.
And then fast forward to 2020, I think you made the first point.
Why the need for an app?
Why didn't we just do it like the good old days when they just called in the results without an issue?
And as my reporting indicated, the DNC basically, in this private meeting that I got details of in the Iowa State Party, the Iowa State Party members said, wait a minute to the attorneys, your report indicates that we actually had the results on caucus night right.
There was no need for a delay.
It could have been reported.
The results were basically essentially a tie.
That's a whole nother discussion, whether you believe those numbers, but basically the results were Buddha Judge like ahead of Bernie by like one tenth of a point, a tie.
But Tom Perez stepped in to block the state party from reporting the results because Tom Perez and the DNC mandated this shadow group to create a special software two weeks before the Iowa caucus that would allow the DNC access to the real-time raw numbers.
You know who else gets access to the real-time raw numbers of elections?
The mafia.
Seriously.
Mexican drug cartels.
Like why James Zogby, who's a longtime DNC member, said to me for the story, why did the DNC need the numbers?
The state parties are supposed to run the elections.
Why is the DNC involved with shooting the numbers?
Why do they need to bless the numbers before they could go out to the public?
So there's a lot of beyond shady things.
And that's to add in, Jimmy.
Remember, this wasn't in my story, but crazily, for the first time, the Des Moines Register poll, the holy grail of Iowa caucus polling gets spiked at the last minute before the caucus when the results were leaked.
Bernie's in first place, Buddha judges in third place.
There's a lot of really shady things.
Frankly, the investigation from my findings was kind of a joke.
I don't know how you investigate anything without speaking with the DNC.
The other thing is in this private meeting, the attorneys said, yeah, we didn't actually use any legally compulsory processes.
We didn't try to obtain documents from the DNC.
We didn't try to compel them for anything.
This would be the equivalent of like Flint, Michigan, which I've covered a lot.
Former Governor Rick Snyder telling investigators, yeah, I'm good.
I'm busy.
I can't speak.
Yeah.
So it's laughable.
And yeah, I mean, there's other things that I reported in the story, but bottom line, you know, we just had a ridiculous investigation into Russia for four and a half years, criminal investigation.
I think we need to have an actual criminal investigation of this because this is a state, this is the national political party basically actually meddling.
I get Russia and the boogeyman.
The DNC actually meddled and it had a downstream effect.
Remember, I went to New Hampshire after Iowa.
We were covering a status coup.
Buda Judge got a 10-point bump because of this delay in reporting the results and the media propping him up as the winner of Iowa.
Frankly, Bernie, as per usual, I mean, I was asking Bernie's campaign, why aren't you in court right now?
Why aren't you in court challenging this?
Why are you just saying, oh, we won the popular vote?
Let's move on.
And what was the answer?
Well, we have the momentum.
We won the popular vote.
I'm like, Bernie, the media doesn't give a damn about the popular vote.
We don't have a democracy.
They're framing, I didn't say it to Bernie.
I said it to his campaign.
They're framing it as Pete won, and he's getting a huge polling bounce.
This is the same thing they did in 2016.
I was on the ground covering the New York primary purge.
Like, at the time, we knew 100,000 voters had been purged.
It came out later, 200,000.
And I asked Bernie's campaign, like, why aren't you in court?
There's like these election justice groups in court, but you're not in court.
Like, 100,000 voters were purged in Brooklyn.
Happens to be one of the most progressive places in America.
You'd get a lot of votes there.
And I was told, you know, we don't want to look like sore losers.
They'll make us into sore losers.
We got to look onto Pennsylvania.
You know who would be in court if either of these things happen right away?
Somebody who wanted to win.
Donald Trump would be in court.
Donald Trump would be.
Joe Biden would be.
George Bush would be.
Yep.
Certainly not Bernie Sanders.
I don't know if you know the people who worked inside his campaign.
I do.
Some of them are very nice people.
None of them were fighters.
I mean, we can litigate that, but I think the ultimate problem was Bernie.
He had a lot of people in his ear telling him to fight, including Nina Turner, by the way.
Nina Turner did tell him to fight.
Yes.
And Bernie did the Bernie.
Bernie did the bernie.
It could only go up to a certain line.
No, you're right.
It falls on.
It definitely falls on Bernie.
You're right.
No doubt about it.
Well, just, and here's the thing about this shadow app.
Okay, I just want to show people.
So this shadow app invented by Hillary Clinton Cabal, right?
So to count the votes in Iowa, right?
The most important.
So Pete Budegig campaign gave Shadow Inc.
a bunch of money so they could work for them.
So Shadow Inc., who developed the app that's going to be counting the votes, they're also getting a shit ton of money from Pete Budegig.
That seems like a conflict of interest.
Because it is.
That doesn't seem like it is because it is a conflict of business.
So Pete Budegig was giving the app developer a shit ton of money to run their text messaging software.
And I don't know if you remember this.
I'm going to play it again.
But Pete Budegig declared victory.
And then after he declared victory, you think you would want to go out to the media and pump it up and talk about how great your victory was.
And now we're on the New Hampshire and let's win there.
And this is the great, the people really spoke.
But he started, but he knows he's going to face reporters who are going to have actual questions about the fuckery that's happening.
And so this, watch this guy's face when he walks out of here.
I have never seen anything like this.
People like to say that Michelle Bachman does crazy stuff or Louis Gohmert or Sarah Palin does weird creative.
This is the all-time craziest thing I've ever seen in politics.
A guy just won the Iowa primary.
He walks out to face the press and this is what he does.
Sure to declare a victory.
How do you feel about Iowa?
How do you feel?
You said Victorius last night.
It goes too early.
feel like your numbers are going well.
Thank you.
What?
It's like a purpoke.
It's like, yeah.
And if you look right back here, if you look at the back of his head, that's where they see that dent?
That's where the on-off switch is for his autonomy, this autonomous.
That's where they put the on-off switch.
You didn't know it?
They forgot to click in him to talk.
And so he just walked.
That is the weirdest thing.
If you're wondering why he would do this, if you're wondering why he would do this.
How do you feel?
You said Victorius last night.
It goes too early.
You feel like the Liberty members are going well.
So that's the look of a guy.
That's how you act when you know that the establishment is cheating on your behalf.
That's what that is.
No one's ever did a walk like that in the history of politics after they won a primary.
And he didn't want to say anything, do anything because he knows they just cheated for him.
And they told him, keep your fucking mouth shut and go to New Hampshire.
We're going to have the press report it that you won.
We're going to pump you up and we're going to get you in New Hampshire.
And they did.
That all happened.
And they did pump him up a 10-point bump, like you said.
So that's what that is.
You're like, why would he do that?
He's doing that because that's how he looks when he knows he's pulling a scam.
That's the look of a guy who knows he's pulling a scam.
And that's what he was doing.
Biden selects Pete Budegig as transportation secretary.
So now you know what he got for dropping out of the race before Super Tuesday and throwing his weight behind Joe Biden.
Barack Obama engineered this to happen.
And that's what he got for doing that.
So is that, go ahead.
By the way, I mean, I was in South Bend.
I actually saw what this man did to this community.
I mean, he was a horrible beer.
It literally, he bulldozed a thousand homes in a thousand days in black and brown communities.
It's a sea of vacant lots.
And I also found out that he actually, his administration paid black-owned businesses to go down the street outside of South Bend to get rid of black-owned businesses.
Wow.
And this is the Cub scout that Joe Biden did a press conference with saying he reminds me of my son Bo.
He's a bad, bad, bad guy.
And as early as 2011, by the way, when Obama was in there, they were already grooming Buddha Judge.
But I think to me, what my story shows is the bigger issue.
Listen, we could talk about a lot of things.
I'm all for forced to vote.
I'm with you.
I'm all for a lot of these other things.
But if you can't actually guarantee free and fair elections, then all of this other stuff is kind of moot.
I mean, what's going to happen in 2024?
Let's just throw out a name, Nina Turner, against incumbent Kamala Harris.
If the DNC is still involved, which by all counts, they will be, we are allowing, literally, I was in Iowa for 2020.
You had thousands and thousands of people in January descend from all over the country and the world.
I met volunteers from other countries that came in to knock on doors for Bernie Sanders in Iowa.
Not to mention how many hardworking working class people gave their money.
So this is election fraud.
I found the election fraud.
This is it.
And if you can't, the DNC should not be involved with elections.
Frankly, we should have one uniform federal election standard, not this Mishmash state to state.
But the Democratic Party, frankly, I mean, they said in court there was a DNC fraud lawsuit.
Their lawyer said, yeah, technically, we're allowed to go in the back room, smoke cigars, and pick the winner.
So people are being defrauded, whether it's progressives who have volunteered, Even the other candidates.
Can you imagine?
Can you just imagine for a second if the RNC would have stopped Iowa from reporting the results and there was a weeks-long delay, how the media would have pummeled them.
But because it was the Democratic Party and it hurt Bernie, they didn't care.
So it's extremely...
I think this is criminal because this is a private corporation, the DNC, defrauding donors, defrauding volunteers.
And yeah, I don't think you're going to have, I don't want to tell people not to participate, not to volunteer, not to donate, but this is now two elections, two primaries.
It wasn't just Iowa.
There was other shenanigans going on in other states.
Super Tuesday, California.
They did a whole lot of fuckery to shrink Bernie's lead.
And not just the actual fraud, but this investigation was a farce.
You have a U.S. attorney appointed by Obama doing it.
They don't talk to the DNC.
The DNC gets to basically stonewall them.
My report also indicates that the Iowa State Party, literally, it was leaked to Politico by the DNC before they could even read the report.
The DNC got it before the Iowa State Party got it.
So it's all very fraudulent.
And yeah, I think progressives have a lot on their plate, but I think we need to really focus on accountability, not just for the DNC, but the whole Democratic party.
Well, you know, Jordan, people now, even didn't I just see somebody, who did I see a prominent lefty tweet out that no, Bernie wasn't cheated in 2016?
I just saw somebody tweet that out.
I'm like, what the fuck?
Was it Jank Uger?
I think it was.
Was that who it was?
I don't know.
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
But I'm like, what is going on?
What is this revisionist history?
Donna Brazil wrote a freaking, I saw the article in the whatever, Politico.
I don't know where she wrote the big article about how she found the contract and Hillary Clinton and the DNC.
She was running it.
It was illegal.
Well, it was against the rules.
I don't know.
I guess not illegal, but it's against the freaking rules.
There's certainly fraud against the donors to the DN, the Democratic National Committee of Democratic Party.
So what that is just nuts that people.
So the weird thing is, is that Bernie never made them do anything about that.
Once that got revealed, Bernie didn't want to be seen as a, again, he's just weak.
He's just a weak, feckless, he's not a leader.
He's weak and feckless, and he doesn't fight when he's supposed to, because if he would have fought then, then maybe this wouldn't have happened in 2020.
But again, they were not made to pay a price for their cheating in 2016, and they didn't change the process at all.
And there was no transparency.
Bernie didn't demand transparency.
He didn't demand anything.
And so consequently, they cheated again in 2016.
And so if you don't have a leader willing to fight, you're not going to get anything.
Hey, George Clooney's calling me.
I wonder if he has any thoughts on President-elect Joe Biden.
Hello?
Hey, Sport.
You got to trim those eyebrows, not cut, trim.
I repeat, I'm not talking about cutting.
Just give them a trim.
Got me.
The what?
Trim not cut?
Is that all you call me about?
Not all, pal.
What's that about anyway?
Are you telling me you don't get the dramatic weight of brow dynamics?
You have to keep the brows tight.
A lot of people think the brow is there just to keep debris and shit from falling into your eye sockets.
They couldn't be more wrong.
That's not you, is it?
Don't be like that, Jack.
This is from yours truly, to J to the D Door.
We're in this together, the show business thing.
I'll give it to you straight.
You know that, bro, dude, right?
Of course.
Great.
Two words.
Midnight and sky.
What do they mean to you?
The sky at midnight?
Midnight sky.
The cloak's latest flick.
It's tight.
It's slow.
It's murky, dystopian, confined.
It's space.
Deathly quiet.
Weightless.
What's that?
It's a fat fire in the shuttle kitchen.
Cut 50 miles per hour wind in the Arctic Circle.
Crackling ice, a doomed landscape.
Don't go home.
It's not there anymore.
Your only choice is a distant moon of Jupiter.
Is this our future or our past?
Jesus.
It's all in the face.
the brows.
Ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
The eyebrows?
Precisely.
Right.
Okay.
Brows are the gateway to your eyes.
Yes, they are.
Yes.
The windows to your soul.
Right.
Jimmy, I'm throwing you a bone here.
Look at my 8x10s.
Study them.
Absorb them.
What do you see?
George Clooney?
Correct.
DeMundo.
Star quality all the way.
Top-notch representation of the craft.
You don't want some seedy weed patch covering over your big browns yelling, hey, watch out.
Don't step in this shit.
He'll twist an ankle.
And that's why my character is stranded alone in the Arctic, awaiting his death in that of his planet.
Has perfectly manicured eyebrows.
No distractions from the moneymaker.
Understand?
just a tip.
laughter laughter laughter laughter laughter The arch.
The architect.
Not to be confused with his opposite, the anti-couldn't be further apart.
Could be further apart.
So when you made this movie, did you discover any parallels between the plot of a dying planet and what's happening now?
Take this and wrap it up.
Joe Biden is the man for this moment.
He's a compassionate, smart, kind, wise man.
I predict he's going to have a very effective president.
Hey, why did you take a trip to London when everybody's supposed to stay put there in the pandemic?
Because I had to take the family to the premiere of my dystopian movie about the end of the world.
And I got a private jet.
Did you take the whole family?
Well, not the dog.
I didn't bring the dog.
She's a 200-pound horse.
You can't have a 200-pound horse in your house that thinks it's a lapdog.
That with the twins who eat like they're mooses.
And the wife of Mal, who's like a goddamn gazelle.
It's just too much.
How is Amal?
My wife, Amal.
She can do amazing things like get journalists out of jail in Myanmar or Azerbaijan.
It's capital of Bake and the thing in the Caspian Sea, the Caucasus Mountains.
But don't let her near the kitchen.
It's devastating.
That's my territory.
Fantastical.
I got the surprise with the twins.
Two completely different human beings.
Basically, it's my job to point them to the North Star and keep them alive, if you know what I mean.
How old are you?
Yeah, I don't have any kids.
So you get where I'm coming from.
It's humbling.
It's such a fascinating process of watching these kids become human.
Human moose.
The gazelle and the 200-pound horse at the dinner table.
The responsibility is tremendous.
We got to do it.
It's like Joel Schumacher.
He'd always use a megaphone to direct and always go, okay, George, remember, your parents are dead.
You have nothing to live for.
And action.
Life is like that.
Well, thanks for the advice on the eyebrows, George.
You heard me on the brow, bro.
Less salt, more pepper.
Got me.
Ciao.
And say hi to the kids for me.
So, Trump, question to Trump.
Do you want to give Edward Snowden a pardon and bring him back, President Trump?
I'm going to look at it.
Gonna look at it?
Still waiting for you to start looking at that, Donald Trump, you big liar.
Go ahead.
But do you want to give Edward Snowden a pardon and bring him back?
You once suggested it.
Well, I'm going to look at it.
I mean, I'm not that aware of the Snowden situation, but I'm going to start looking at it.
There are many, many people.
It seems to be a split decision.
Many people think that he should be somehow treated differently, and other people think he did very bad things.
And I'm going to take a very good look at it, okay?
I mean, I've seen people that are very conservative and very liberal, and they agree on the same issue.
They agree both ways.
I'm going to take a look at that very strongly, Edward Snowden.
Yeah, please.
Yeah, I agree.
It's a sad topic that it's even open for debate.
Snowden should be pardoned and Assange should be free.
Oh, wait.
That's not what he said.
Susan Rice tweeted, congratulations, GOP.
This is who you are now.
I just can't.
Yes.
This is who this is who Joe Biden just appointed, someone who wants to prosecute journalists.
And Trump is the bad guy.
That's what she's saying.
She wants to prosecute journalists and whistleblowers.
That's what Susan Rice is saying.
Just appoint.
Susan Rice is the domestic policy advisor designate for the president-elect.
She's a national security advisor and a U.N. ambassador and a mom who likes prosecuting journalists.
Susan Rice, I'm pretty sure she's a war criminal, too, and a mom.
I like when moms are war criminals.
You like to kill other people's kids while you're a mom.
Isn't she a war criminal?
Pretty sure, Susan Rice.
Pretty sure.
I just can't.
Congratulations, corporate Democrats.
This is who you are now.
Neoliberal authoritarians who oppose whistleblowers who reveal that our own government is spying on us, which is a violation of our privacy and Fourth Amendment rights.
Snowden is a patriot.
You're correct, Ryan.
Trump pardoned for Julian Assange would secure presidential legacy as a defender of free speech, says Nobel laureates.
Five Nobel Prize winners have urged Donald Trump to put a defining stamp on his presidency by offering a pardon to Wikileaks founder Julian Assange.
Assange's supporters say he is being persecuted as a journalist, claiming the case against him poses a threat that the First Amendment protection of free speech poses a threat to the First Amendment protection of free speech in the U.S. Constitution.
We write to request that you put a defining stamp on your presidential legacy by pardoning Julian Assange or stopping his extradition, the five Nobel Prize laureates said.
Assange has fought for truth and justice.
His work with WikiLeaks has pioneered accountability in the media and exposed corruption, civil liberties violations in the United States and around the world, and the true cost of war.
The Nobel Prize laureates say the case against Assange threatens the constitutional protections that Americans hold dear, suggesting to Trump by offering a pardon to put a stop to the prosecution of Assange, your presidency will be remembered for having saved First Amendment protections for all Americans.
Trump could have pardoned whistleblower Julian Assange, Chelsea Manning, and Edward Snowden.
Instead, he chose to pardon four Blackwater mercenaries who murdered 17 Iraqi civilians, including two boys 8 and 11, in an unprovoked attack on a crowd of unarmed people.
Disgusting.
Hey, shock and dismay after Trump pardons Blackwater guards who killed 14 Iraqi civilians.
This is what he had time to look at instead of Edward Snowden and Julian Assange.
This is what your hero Trump had time to look at.
Didn't have time to look at Snowden or Assange, but he had time to do that.
You still don't think he's a con man?
Never did a fucking thing he said he was gonna?
Never gave you health care, never gave you an infrastructure bill, never pulled the troops out from the Middle East, never did anything.
He gave a tax cut to the richest people in the world.
He gave $5 trillion to the richest people in the world while still denying you health care or a UBI or pardoning anybody except actual war criminals.
Yeah, they're okay.
They're all fucking murderers.
Pardoning the Blackwater contractor is an affront to justice and to victims of the Nassau Square massacre and their families, said the chair of the UN.
This is your non-interventionist.
If you're a Trumper, this is your non-interventionist pardoning people who committed massacres in other countries.
The Geneva Convention obliged states to hold war criminals accountable for their crimes, even when they act as private security contractors, the U.N. experts said.
It would seem, especially if they're private contracts.
It would seem especially.
These pardons violate U.S. obligations under international law and more broadly undermine humanitarian law and human rights at a global level.
Kushner pardoned Revives Lotham tale of tax evasion and sex.
After Charles Kushner discovered his brother-in-law was cooperating With federal authorities, the wealthy real estate executive and father of President Donald Trump's son-in-law, Jared Kushner, hatched a scheme for revenge and intimidation.
Kushner hired a prostitute to lure his brother-in-law, then arranged to have an encounter in a New Jersey hotel room recorded with a hidden camera and the recording sent to his own sister, the man's wife.
The scheme didn't work.
Charles Kushner later pleaded guilty to tax evasion and making illegal campaign donations in a case Taylor made for tabloid headlines.
The White House, in its announcement, cited Kushner's charitable work since he completed his sentence in 2006 as the reason he deserved clemency.
See, these are the people who Trump is pardoning instead of Edward Snowden, instead of Chelsea Manning, instead of Julian Assange.
And he's still your hero.
You're a fucking chump.
Donald Trump is the swamp.
Thank you to everyone asking President Trump to pardon my son Julian.
I still hold out hope that he yet may do so.
It would indeed be an historical act of mercy, courage, and presidential power.
And if he doesn't do it, you know exactly who he is.
I mean, we all know who he is.
He just has to now just keep doing it.
Jeremy Scahill, who doesn't know how to ask follow-up questions, says this.
Jeremy Scahill, if you want to know how to ask follow-up, a YouTube host could show you.
I can show you how to do a follow-up question if you need help.
Jeremy Scahill says people can debate many things about Julian Assange, but let's be clear.
The reason Assange is being subjected to inhumane treatment and the threat of extradition to the U.S. is about punishment for exposing U.S. war crimes and dirty deeds.
It is a threat to all journalists.
But censorship isn't, Jeremy?
That's interesting.
Bill Binney, you know him from our show, the NSA's top code breaker than they tried to frame and put in jail because he blew the whistle on the NSA.
He says, Mr. President, freeing Julian Assange and pardoning Edward Snowden would send a message to the world that you value truth and honesty.
You certainly haven't got that from all the swamp creatures around you.
Government has real problems they don't want to face, so don't protect them.
He is, Bill.
Sorry to say.
Don't extradite Julian Assange.
I would say free Julian Assange.
So that's Sunday, January 5th at the British Embassy, 3,100 Massachusetts Avenue, Northwest.
Monday, January 4th, the Department of Justice.
So they're going to have some actions.
So on Sunday, January 3rd at the British Embassy and Monday, January 4th at the Department of Justice.
Americans for Assange.
Publishing the truth is not a crime.
Torturing a journalist is free Julian Assange.
So there you go.
And all you sycophants of Donald Trump, maybe you'd want to tweet at him because he reads his Twitter.
Maybe tweet at him to pardon Julian Assange and Edward Snowden and Chelsea Manning while he's at it.
But you know, he won't.
So that's why you probably won't tweet at him because you just want a fake hero.
I get it.
Everybody wants a hero.
I wanted Bernie.
Bernie was my hero in 2015, 16.
I know what that's like.
But you got to face the music when you see who they really are.
Bernie has proved over and over again he won't actually cross the establishment.
So does Donald Trump go tell Donald Trump what you think of him if he doesn't do this?
Hey, Senator Bernie Sanders is calling me.
Hello.
Let's get to the point, and I want to make myself very clear on this.
It's no secret that I would like to see Joe Biden's cabinet move further to the left.
Move further to the left, Bernie?
Okay, tilt further in that direction, perhaps.
How is it even tilting?
Okay, just lean to the left a little bit more, kind of.
A little more?
Okay, just give the appearance of leading to the left.
You know, like when you take a photo or something and then angle the viewfinder to the right.
Well, what good is that?
It makes everything look like it's leaning to the left.
They could at least do that with the goddamn cabinet.
It's a simple optical illusion.
Like at the Circus Front House with the squiggly mirrors that make your head three times bigger than yours.
They could do that.
They have the technology.
Is that too much to ask?
So you're not too happy with the Biden's cabinet.
How it's shaping up?
Look, I respect Joe Biden's cabinet.
Joe Biden's cabinet is a friend of mine.
But I'm going to be blunt.
I would like to see progressive seats in that cabinet.
And that has not yet happened in that cabinet.
Hey, do you really think that'll ever happen?
Look, there comes a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious and that you're so sick at heart that you can no longer take part.
And you've got to put your body on the gears, on the levers, and upon the wheels of the apparatus.
And you've got to make it stop.
So you're saying the right time is now?
Yeah, we could still work within the system.
Now's not the right time for that.
Then when is the right time for that, Bernie?
Right times are hard to come by, Jimmy.
The average layperson doesn't understand them.
You can't go about putting your body on the gears of the apparatus willy-nilly.
You have to wait for the right time for the right time.
How can we tell when the right time has arrived?
Somebody in charge will tell you.
Most likely, you'll get a fundraising email from a grassroots organization funded by venture capitalists and Buddy Roma.
You know, the usual process.
Yeah, gee, Bernie, I always thought the right time was all the time.
Noam Chomsky calls that real politics.
Well, Noam Chomsky doesn't have a fucking committee assignment.
The right time will appear magically to the gatekeeper people, like those funded by billionaires, sons, or stockbrokers.
For instance, now is the right time for me to stop talking to your annoying ass.
I have important work to do to attend right now.
I'm filibustering on the Senate floor for $2,000 relief checks.
Well, that sounds great, Bernie.
How come you couldn't do that months ago, like 10 months ago?
Now's not the right time to ask that.
Call me in 10 months.
Hey, guess what?
What?
Your time is up.
Glenn Greenwald tweeted out in 2018 when AOC was running against Joe Crowley.
I interviewed her and I asked whether she thought Nancy Pelosi and Stenny Hoyer should continue in their leadership roles or be replaced and whether she'd agitate for replacements.
Here's what she said.
Are you ready?
Very deep level.
So we just have a little bit of time left.
Let me just ask you a couple of what I hope are quick questions.
Your opponent, Congressman Crowley, has been pretty upfront about his hopes to replace Nancy Pelosi and Stenny Hoyer in the Democratic top wing of the Democratic leadership once they retire or maybe even before that.
For as long as I can remember, the Democratic Party in the House has been led by Nancy Pelosi and Stenny Hoyer.
So if you are elected, will you agitate for different leaders leading the Democratic Party in the House caucus?
Or do you think That Pelosi and Hoyer should continue to be in those leadership positions.
No, I think that we need new leadership.
I think the idea that we should have the same leadership for more than one generation is probably a mistake in American politics in general.
You know, when I think about my opponent trying to take Nancy Pelosi's seat, it's like, why?
Like, what has he done?
And I think that what we need to really look at and value, and, you know, it goes back down to the idea of valuing fundraising and equating fundraising with leadership.
And they're not the same thing.
I think that we really need to start kind of changing our standards for leadership and what we define and what we respect as a party.
And it's not to say that, you know, it's not to speak to Pelosi's leadership, but it's to say, you know, what company oftentimes has the same CEO for 20 years?
Or, you know, it's very rare that that happens.
And what government has a president for the same president for 20 years?
And the idea that the third most powerful seat in the country should just be rotated in and out by the same two people for generations, I think is a mistake in our government.
Government isn't that something.
Well, I never criticized her for quickly voting for Pelosi because she had a cogent rationale.
The alternative, Tim Ryan, was worse.
The problem is this is her reward for supporting Pelosi is losing a key committee seat to a rival who opposed Pelosi.
So she didn't lose that committee seat because she opposed Pelosi, as a lot of people are reporting erroneously.
She lost that committee seat because the person who did oppose her vowed to vote against her got rewarded because Nancy Pelosi needed her to vote for her.
And she knows that AOC is going to vote for her anyway.
AOC is going to vote for Nancy Pelosi as speaker.
You know what you mean?
It's almost like Kathleen Rice used that as leverage.
As leverage.
She used her vote as leverage to get that committee assignment.
And that's what AOC said she was doing.
She said they were using their committee assignments as they're using their leverage to get committee assignments.
And then she got kicked off her committee.
So you know she wasn't even doing that.
So AOC, the next time, are you going to try to get something for your vote for Nancy Pelosi?
Something up front.
Are you going to be fooled again in January?
Are you going to make demands for your vote?
Ultimately, the Democratic Party will ignore you and take you for granted if you play the good soldier and lend your support unconditionally.
You only have power and leverage if you show you're willing to subvert them.
And the DC DNC structures reward the corrupt.
So show your loyalty, and then they'll at least be nice to you, but they're not even nice to you.
They screw you.
Here she is again.
This is her own words.
Don't people realize that the most powerful position you can be in is when you are not materially attached to a position of power.
If you're a one-term Congress member, so what?
You can make 10 years worth of change in one term if you're not afraid.
People.
What's.
But somehow I'm the one who's a meanie because I just want her to do what she's been saying.
And she's not going to do it.
Ocasio-Cortez takes direct shot at Pelosi and Schumer.
The progressive star bluntly stated, we need new leadership in the Democratic Party.
That's a head fake.
That's a head fake.
She doesn't mean that.
Pelosi's caucus unanimously nominated her last month unanimously.
So that means AOC, the squad, everybody voted for Nancy Pelosi to be speaker again.
Unanimous.
That's what unanimous means, I'm pretty sure.
I'm no Daniel Webster.
But it's not absolutely certain she can win the speaker's gavel in the House floor vote on January 3rd because House Democrats unexpectedly under Nancy Pelosi, again, lost more than a dozen seats in the November election.
Their majority is now down to just single digits, meaning a handful of Democratic defectors could deny Pelosi another term leading the party.
In other words, she did so painfully shitty, Nancy Pelosi, so painfully shitty and constantly loses.
She really shouldn't be leading anyone anywhere.
But the Democrats don't care all that much about winning.
So if Nancy Pelosi was an actress, she would be referred to as box office poison.
Ocasio-Cortez, however, gave no indication that she will vote against Pelosi on the floor, even as other moderate Democrats have, and then got seats on committees because they said they weren't going to vote for her.
Ocasio-Cortez, I'm voting for Mama Bear.
She says, oh, we need new leadership, but I'm, but then she says, but there's no one.
Well, I think it's in the show.
The hesitancy I have is that I want to make sure that if we're pointing people in a direction that we have a plan, Ocasio-Cortez says.
And my concern, and this I acknowledge as a failing as someone that we need to sort, something that we need to sort out, is that there isn't a plan.
How do we fill the vacuum?
She's admitting they have no plan to use their leverage.
She's admitting that the people with the power have not strategized and have no strategy, none.
She's admitting it.
I have a strategy.
Leverage your vote to get a better care for all vote on the floor in the middle of a deadly pandemic.
That is a strategy that a lot of people agree with.
Thank you.
The actual sad state of affairs is that there are folks more conservative that are willing to.
So she's afraid that there's going to be someone more conservative becomes speaker.
So it's lesser of two evil voting, even for speaker.
So who doesn't matter who becomes speaker?
You don't have to vote for them until they meet your demands.
That's the part she's leaving out.
She's like, well, if I don't vote for Nancy Pelosi, we'll get someone even further right.
Who cares?
I want the same demand of no matter who is the speaker or they don't get your vote and they can't become speaker.
Do you understand that?
The squad has all the power.
Nobody can become speaker without the squad's votes.
Now, there's a lot of people bending themselves in the pretzels not to understand this because they're trying to kneecap this moment like Jenk Uger is.
He needs another round of corporate funding, so he's trying to kneecap this moment and tell you lies like that, just like AOC is telling.
They got the same email.
Jenk got it from the same donor class.
He got the email that said, We can't vote for, we have to vote for Nancy because someone even more conservative.
It doesn't matter who the speaker is.
You make the same demand.
You make the same demand.
Does it matter?
No one can become speaker without the squad's votes.
No one can become speaker without the squad's votes.
Congressional Progressive Caucus.
What is the Progressive Congressional Caucus?
Well, it's a nice idea that I wish we actually had.
That's what the Progressive Congressional Caucus is.
It's a nice idea.
I wish we had.
There's supposed to be 100 members of the Progressive Caucus.
They should really add maybe to that description.
Maybe a Congressional Progressive Caucus.
Hey, AOC, Nancy Pelosi needs to go, but there's nobody to replace her yet.
There's that lie.
There's that lie I heard from Jenk Uger.
And I heard it from AOC.
Isn't that weird?
They both have the same talking points.
Isn't that weird?
Isn't it weird when Jenk Uger sounds just like a politician?
Isn't that weird?
They have the same talking points.
It is weird.
But completely expected, isn't it?
after you take $20 million in Clinton donor cash, and now you're sabotaging the progressive movement.
Thank you.
Pelosi needs to go, but there's nobody to replace her yet, says AOC.
Check my notes.
Really?
Well, there's Pramila J. Appell, Rasheed Talib, Bill Hon Omar, Katie Porter, Roe Conna, Mark Polk.
a lot of people.
Yet is the battle cry of the Democrats: we need health care, but not yet.
Is that their battle cry?
We need health care, but not yet.
Is that their battle cry?
We need health care, but not yet.
I just got another email from the Young Turks begging me for money.
I swear to God.
They're very close to their goal.
That's the Young Turks' high-pressure campaign to get poor people to give them money.
Not pressuring the government to give us health care, but to get poor people to give the Young Turks money.
That's their high-pressure campaign that Jenk Uger is currently running.
I'm getting four to five emails a week from them.
That's their high-pressure campaign.
My high-pressure campaign is trying to make the progressives that we elected get us Medicare for all.
I guess the young Turks want to say we got to demand Medicare for all, but not now.
Let's not demand it now.
Not until we get some more cash.
We need to do something about climate change, but not yet.
We need living wages, but not yet.
We need to end the wars, but not yet.
You should be able to go to college without going into debt, but not yet.
We have to keep waiting.
No more waiting.
There's their numbers.
Pramila J. Appell, go to force the vote.org and sign the petition.
Please do that.
Go to force the vote.org, sign the petition.
There's their numbers.
Pramila J. Appell.
Mark Pokhad, 202-225-3106.
Mark Pokhad, 202-225-2906.
Rashid Talib, 202-225-5126.
Ayana Presley, 202-225-5111.
Ilhan Omar, 202-225-4755.
ForceThevote.org.
Go there and sign.
Call your legislators.
Make sure they know you want Medicare for all as a vote.
Hello, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy.
It's my Fateo.
Ah, Secretary Pompeo.
It's so good to hear from you.
How are things?
The Trump administration is going very well.
We have no problems whatsoever to speak of.
And we are really playing some 3D chess here.
Jimmy, we are doing math in hexadecimal over here.
Hey, you know, there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDorrickComedy.com, sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Today's show was written by Ron Placone, Mark Van Landuit, Steph Zamarano, Jim Earl, Mike McRae, and Roger Rittenhouse.
All the voices performed today by the one and the only of the inimitable, Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
you be the best you can be and I'll keep being me.
Don't freak out!
I'm not kidding!
Don't freak out!
Don't freak out!
Do not freak.
Don't freak out.
Do not, do not.
Do not not freak.
Do not freak.
Do not freak out.
Don't bring out.
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