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Nov. 12, 2016 - Jimmy Dore Show
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Today's Jimmy Dore show is brought to you by Casper.
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show!
The Jimmy Dore Show!
Hello, this is Jimmy Dore.
Yes, hello.
This is Hillary supporter.
Oh, wow.
Hey, Hillary supporter.
Haven't heard from you in a while.
Yes, well, I had been busy campaigning for Hillary, primarily on Facebook and Twitter.
And I was just on the verge of figuring out Snapchat, but I ran out of time.
I feel terrible because I think that could have turned everything in her favor.
But point B, hashtag, I'm still with her.
Wow, even still, huh?
Even more than before.
Times a million.
Wow.
Well, I'm sorry she lost, you know, in a way.
Oh, she won, actually.
She won a moral victory, which is more important than winning the election itself.
You know, I'm not sure I agree with that.
Of course, you don't.
How could you with your rotten Bernie bro soul eating you from the inside out?
She won by losing.
I refuse to see this as a loss.
This is a victory, a true victory.
And I thank the goddess for it.
And I have burnt the sage and danced in the light and drank of the Earth's sacrament in gratitude.
And I did all of this in the courtyard of my apartment complex until that little bitch, Tiffany, from the office, came out and made me stop.
I'm sorry, Hillary supporter, but you're a Hillary supporter.
Didn't you want her to be president?
Yes, more than anything else I've ever wanted, ever.
But that's why her not getting to be president is so perfect.
Me not getting what I want as part of my identity.
And even more important, now her presidency is purely hypothetical.
A platonic ideal of a presidency where a wise woman would have fixed all our problems and gently nagged us towards a true utopia.
So all of the drone strikes and corporate disfavoritism will now have never happened.
So all these birdie idiots can't whine about it.
And instead of this verdant paradise, we have a nightmare scenario all because of straight white men.
You know, actually, white women helped Trump get elected bigly.
How dare you?
You shut up.
Sorry, but that's what the polls say.
You shut up.
You hush.
You just hush it.
I need this.
We need this.
Don't you see?
With Trump in office, I can blame literally everything on white men.
And I'm not going to let some straight white male like you take that away from me.
Well, what is Hillary going to do now?
I mean, how are you going to support her?
I don't really know the answer to that, actually, but I can tell you that I'm going to support her while living in this bizarro reality where she didn't win in 2016 by complaining about everything.
Even things that don't have to do with Hillary?
Everything and anything.
Like, for example, your aggressive tone.
It's very controlling and making me feel unsafe.
Okay, well, you know what we have to do then, right?
March in the streets and block traffic for people trying to get home to their families?
No.
Go to City Hall and yell about lentils?
No.
Well, then what?
We have to retire the Hillary supporter character.
You have to go back to being offended listener.
What?
No.
Yes.
I'm sorry, but the election is over.
Hillary is not running for anything anymore.
And if your complaints are going to be generalized, then we have to name the character accordingly.
Well, okay.
I guess that works.
I mean, I am offended perpetually.
I know.
All right, then.
Well, bud, you better know this.
I'm going to be the most offended I've ever been.
I'm going to be the most offended person ever.
I'm going to double down on my efforts.
And I'm going to be watching you in particular, Buster.
If you even so much as use a wrong pronoun, I'm going to rain holy hell down on you.
You piece of shit.
Okay.
Do you understand me?
Yes, I understand.
Try to make myself clear.
Yes, you do, offended listener.
Well, good.
All right, then.
Well, I have to go, and I'm going to go back to what I was doing before, which is posting pictures of me crying on Instagram.
That helps, right?
All right.
Well, I look forward to talking with you more in the future, offended listener.
Oh, goddess.
Oh, goddess.
It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for Nation.
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper save.
It's hard to talk to me, T.W. Here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore!
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to this week's Jimmy Dore show.
I'm joined in the studio right now by Abby Award-winning writer Jim Earl.
Hi, Jim.
How are you?
Yeah, I know.
That's how I am too.
Hey, hey, Thompson's here.
Hank, I hear you're a little worse than us.
Yeah, I have it.
Hey, horrible.
Hey, I feel like I'm about to throws up, but guess what happens after you throws up?
You feel better.
Diarrhea.
Oh, that's right.
And then a little diarrhea.
If you eat the throw.
Shouldn't have said that.
In two years, we're going to make a progressive killing.
Anyway, let's get to today's jokes before we get to the joke, shall we?
Whatever you take away from this election, my advice would be to start with canned goods and potable water.
That's how you pronounce it, right, potable?
Potable.
I appreciate you.
You were smiling as big as you've ever spotted, but you're keeping the laugh still inside, which is nice.
Potable water is still illegal.
I'm a tasteful comment.
You are tasteful.
You know, the Alemic State celebrated the news of Trump's victory, hoping his triumph would lead to a civil war or even worse, a spin-off of The Apprentice.
Oh, that would be a disaster.
That would be a disaster.
Country.
Jim, did you know plans are already being laid for the location of the Donald Trump presidential library?
No.
This is true.
It's a toss-up between two countries Trump can't name the leaders of.
That makes sense.
You know, it's a good thing neither of those candidates took a moral position on the Standing Rocks cause, because if they would have, I probably would have died of a fucking heart attack.
Then where would we be?
You know?
Then we'd be lost.
Hey, I don't know about you, but I voted with my penis.
Really?
Yeah, because it's the only part of my body with a working thumb.
That is the dumbest fucking joke.
Well, to be fair, it is tough to find something small enough to fit in that little punch hole.
Bam!
You set yourself up for that.
Punchline tagging.
Look at these tiny hands.
Hey, what's the worst?
I got to tell you, in all seriousness, people are overlooking this, but the worst part of Trump's presidency is that Chuck Willery's tweeting again.
I got him to laugh.
I got Hank to laugh.
Mr. Depression is laughing at the joke about Chuck Willery.
That guy will not go away.
That guy will go away.
He'll be back in 2-2.
Two and two.
Two years.
Two years.
Hey, well, whatever happens in the next four years, I just hope Wall Street doesn't suffer.
They'll be fine.
Hillary's speaking fees are plummeting, by the way, guys.
Oh, you're kidding.
All the way down to $100 a speech.
Hey, on a sadder note, in the midst of this, of all of this, Janet Reno, Hank, Janet Reno passed away.
Hey, unfriend me if you must, but I never thought Janet Reno 911 was funny.
Oh, man.
Hey, what's coming up on today's show?
I don't know yet.
We're going to talk about the election.
What really happened?
Why did she lose?
Where did she lose?
And we all don't know what the hell the hell the Democrats were thinking.
We're going to talk about it.
Plus, what are we going to do going forward?
Plus, how are you supposed to react like Bernie Sanders?
How you're not supposed to react.
Plus, we got phone calls.
Well, you already heard one of them, but we're going to have a phone call today from Chris Christie.
Our final call from Hillary supporter.
That's today on The Jimmy Dore Show.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
The Democrats, I think, are already learning the wrong lesson from the Donald Trump presidency.
Certainly the media is.
What happened?
What happened was the Democrats, and this is just as simple as I can put it.
The Democrats became Republicans.
Bill Clinton got in bed with Wall Street, Big Pharma, Fossil Fuels, and Silicon Valley.
And they turned their back on the workers.
And this is the effect.
Hillary Clinton went after Republicans.
She didn't go after unions.
She didn't go after progressives.
She didn't go after us at all.
This is from a story I did on August 10th of this year.
And I was talking about the horrible strategies that the Democrats are.
Now they're full-fledged Republicans.
So this is from August 10th.
Chuck Schumer was saying this.
This is their strategy wasn't to go after progressives.
Their strategy wasn't to go after workers or unions or whatever.
This was their strategy was to go after Republicans.
Chuck Schumer said for every blue-collar Democrat we lose in Western Pennsylvania, we will pick up two or three moderate Republicans in the suburbs of Philadelphia.
That's their plan.
Their plan was to get more Republicans to vote for them.
Well, why not just run in the Republican Party?
He goes on: the voters who are most out there figuring out what to do are not blue-collar Democrats because they got nowhere to go.
Is that what you thought, Chuck?
They are the college-educated Republicans or independents who lead Republican in the suburbs.
That's who Chuck Schumer likes.
That's who he's most comfortable around.
That's who the Democrats are comfortable around now.
They're the party of Wall Street and Silicon Valley.
And this is the result.
I'll give you one more thing.
This is from Washington's blog.
And it says, here's the stat I really want to get to.
38% of all American workers made less than $20,000 last year.
That's almost four out of 10 workers.
Made less than $20,000.
Almost four out of 10 workers in America, richest country face of the earth has ever seen.
51% of all American workers made less than $30,000 last year.
51%.
62% of all American workers made less than $40,000 last year.
And 71% of all American workers made less than $50,000 last year.
And so what does that mean?
Well, how did Hillary Clinton really lose?
So this is the problem.
And Hillary Clinton didn't have a message to those people.
Her message was Trump's in Russia.
He's a Russian.
He's in bed with Putin.
Trump, Russia.
What?
Oh, he's deplorable.
He's bad.
He's sexist.
He's what?
That's, yeah, I get it.
So this, this was never addressed.
And how did she realize, so how did she lose Michigan and Wisconsin?
First of all, 7 million less voters this year.
Exactly as I predicted, not to pack myself in the back.
But I was like, I'm pretty sure this will be the lowest voter turnout in a while.
It was.
Barack Obama had less voters in 2012 than he had in 2008 because a lot of people got hip to his corporatism.
And in 2016, less voters than in 2012.
Donald Trump got less votes than Mitt Romney, and he still beat Hillary Clinton.
Here's what happened in Wisconsin and Michigan.
Michigan, Wayne County, Detroit, basically, Obama got 596,000 votes.
Hillary Clinton got 467,000 votes.
That was 129,000 less votes in Detroit.
Hillary Clinton got them Barack Obama.
They didn't come out for her.
They didn't come out.
That was the statewide margin when I put this together at 3 a.m. was 61,000.
In Wisconsin, Obama in 2012 had three.
And by the way, in 2012, his votes were suppressed.
They weren't as big as they were in 2008.
In 2012, Obama got 332,000 votes in Milwaukee.
Clinton in this year got almost 100,000 less votes, almost a third less votes in Milwaukee.
The statewide margin in Wisconsin was 73,000.
There you go, right there.
The people in the cities, I'm going to say probably African Americans weren't going to vote for her.
So 13,225 votes that Trump beat.
That's the margin of victory for him in Michigan.
And look at that.
129,000 less votes in Detroit.
There you go.
There's your victory.
How about Wisconsin?
What's the final tally?
What's his final margin of victory in Wisconsin?
27,000 votes in Wisconsin.
Trump won by.
She was down 95,000 votes just in Milwaukee alone.
The turnout in 2012 for Obama, 65.9 million people.
2016, Clinton got 59.1 million.
That's 6.8 million less votes than Barack Obama.
That's a lot of less votes.
Romney got 60 million point nine votes, and Trump got less votes than him and still won.
He got almost 2 million less votes.
So the vote was suppressed.
People did not get off the couch to go vote for Hillary Clinton.
And that's what happens.
You know, Howard Dean in 2003, you want to know why half the country doesn't vote?
Because you have to give them something to vote for.
Here's a little bit more.
White men, 35% for Obama, 31% for Clinton.
So actually, more white guys voted for a black guy than voted for a white woman.
Clinton got just 37% of the white vote.
Obama got 39% of the white vote.
And here's David Axelrod, who's the campaign genius of Barack Obama's.
This is what he said in February.
When the exact same problems crop up in separate campaigns with different staff, at what point did the principals say, hey, maybe it's us?
So it's not, it doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened.
She's possibly the worst politician in the history of our country.
She first lost in 2008, and then she lost to Donald Trump eight years later.
It's no secret what happened.
We was told you this over and over.
She wasn't coming for our vote.
She's going for Republicans.
And when American people are given the choice between a Republican and a Republican, they choose to be Republican every time.
She suppressed the vote of her own people.
She did it in the primary.
The people who were most enthused just let it go.
By the way, same thing Barack Obama did when he won the first time, 2008, he had this huge coalition, all these people ready to do something, and he just disbanded them.
He didn't do anything with them.
And a lot of people talked about it at the time.
Not a lot of people, but some people.
Okay, so here's a guy who writes I like.
His name is Sam Chris.
He says, she decided it was her turn and it was hers by right.
She knew that she was electoral poison, that vast swaths of the country hated her and for good reason, that she was compromised by a miserable record spotted with sleas and criminality, that she alienated the left, inflamed the right, and appealed mostly to a small coterie.
She appealed mostly to a small coterie of sexually repressed and pathologically centrist think tank nerds.
That her entire constituency was made of limp cardboard and backlogged semen.
That her candidacy raised the serious possibility of a Republican victory when anyone else would have beaten that divided and frothing party into insignificance with one head tied behind their back.
But she ran anyway.
She knew all that, and she ran anyway.
But it's not enough, he goes on.
If only the problem was too many bigots, the whole election collapses into a question of tribes and demographics.
And you don't have to think about why Clinton lost.
Because that's what people are doing now.
They're going, oh, it's racism.
So if you do that, you don't have to really look at the real reasons why Hillary Clinton rocked.
Trump won among voters who ticked the box for Obama in 2008 and 2012.
So people who voted for Obama, a lot of them voted for Trump.
Whoa, isn't that wild?
He won decisively among white women.
Trump did.
He picked up far bigger share of ethnic minority voters than anyone would have reasonably expected.
He won because the standard formula of American liberalism, which is eternal war abroad, coupled with rationally administered dispossession at home and an ethic centered on where people should be allowed to piss and shit, is a toxic and unlovable ideology.
And his candidacy turned it from an invisible consensus to one option among others.
Clinton decided as a vast country, as the vast country fumed bitterly for something different, anything, that she would actively court the approval of a few hundred policy wonks.
Clinton all but outrightly told vast swaths of the American working classes that they were irrelevant, that she didn't need them and they would be left behind by history and then expected them to come out and vote for her anyway.
Clinton was playing at politics.
It was big.
It was a big and important game, but it could be fun too.
It was entertainment.
It was a play of personalities.
They forgot the trashy reality show always gets the highest ratings.
So here's one more thing I'll read to you.
It says the fascisms of Europe in the 20s, 30s, or East Asia in the 50s and 60s, or Latin America in the 70s and 80s were all the response of a capitalist order to the terrifying potency of the organized working class.
Fascism is what capitalism does when it's under threat.
Something always latent, but extending in clause when it's time to fight.
It imitates mass movements while never really having the support of the masses.
So fascism is what capitalism does when it's under threat.
Look what's happening in North Dakota.
Look what they did to occupy Wall Street.
And here's what our friend Thomas Frank, who wrote, Listen Liberal, says.
She was the Democratic candidate because it was her turn and because a Clinton victory would have moved every Democrat in Washington up one notch.
Whether or not she would win was always a secondary matter, something that was taken for granted.
Had winning been the party's number one concern, several more suitable candidates were ready to go.
There's Joe Biden with his powerful, plain spoken style, and there was Bernie Sanders, an inspiring and largely scandal-free figure.
Each of them would probably have beaten Trump, but neither of them would really have served the interests of the party insider.
The American white-collar class just spent the year.
So anyway, he ends by saying the even larger problem is that there is a kind of chronic complacency that has been rotting American liberalism for years.
A hubris that tells Democrats they need to do nothing different.
They need deliver nothing really to anyone except their friends on the Google Jet and those nice people at Goldman Sachs.
The rest of us are treated as though we have nowhere else to go and no role to play except to vote enthusiastically on the grounds that these Democrats are the last thing standing between us and the end of the world.
It is a liberalism of the rich.
It has failed the middle class and now it has failed on its own terms of electability.
Meaning, the whole reason Al Gore and Bill Clinton moved the party to the right and then Barack Obama kept it going on Hillary Clinton is that they wanted to be electable.
That's the whole point.
We got to move to the right to be elected.
That's what Democrats always say and do.
We got to move to the right.
We got to reach out.
We got to be more conservative so we can get elected.
So now they're 100% Republican and the whole reason for doing that has been upended.
It's been disproven by this election.
It has failed on its own terms of electability.
So what happens?
Where do we go from here?
Now, you know that I had a theory.
It would be easier to pose bad things by a Republican than oppose bad things like a Democrat.
Well, House and Senate is Republican.
So we'll see what happens.
But Trump definitely puts the ugly face on ugly policies.
Right now, we got cops cracking the heads of peaceful protesters in North Dakota At the behest of corporations, here's what I'm going to tell people.
Don't freak out.
It's not as bad as people think.
And there are some silver linings.
Here, what can we do?
Well, first of all, in two years, we try to take back, you know, we make a dent in the House, in the Senate.
In two years, the off-year election, always bad for the incumbents, always bad for the sitting president, off-year elections.
If the suppressed vote this year, 7 million less votes than last election, 2012, which was lower than 2008, 2012 was.
People want to be inspired.
So I think we do a progressive coalition.
Look, Pramila Jayapel won.
She's a progressive.
We had some Tammy Duckworth.
So we had progressive wins, even in a year when 7 million Democrats didn't show up or 7 million less people showed up to vote.
Hillary had zero coattails.
But the weird thing is she won the popular vote just like Al Gore did.
And we're giving the election to the person who lost the popular vote.
A system set up by slave-owning white men to keep power in the hands of land-owning white men.
Still with us today for no reason, except, and here it is, twice this century, 40% of the elections this century, the guy who won the election doesn't get to be president.
40%.
So we've had five elections, right?
Five elections.
One in 2000, 2004, 2008, 2012, and in 2016.
That's five.
Two of them overturned.
What is that percentage-wise?
Two of five.
According to my math computer, that's 40%.
That's 40%.
Use my brain.
So I say we got to so we have to organize now.
So progressives have to organize even more, right?
And we have to try to build up unions.
We have to build up the Occupy movement.
We have to build up Black Lives Matter.
We have to have an anti-war movement in America.
Why do I say these things?
Because if you remember, when Richard Nixon was president, we got that guy to give us OSHA, the EPA.
He proposed a healthcare plan that was better than Obamacare.
That was Nixon.
Nixon.
He did lots of stuff like that.
The good thing is that Trump does put an ugly face on the exact policies that Obama and the Dems have been pushing since Bill Clinton.
The policies that have hollowed out the middle class and left half the country poor in poverty.
That's right.
Half the population of the United States is poor in poverty.
United States, the richest country in the world.
And half of us are poor.
So it's time for progressive resurgence.
I think it's coming.
I think progressive organizations are going to be speaking up louder.
And now we don't have half the people on the left working against us.
That's what happens with Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.
Half the people on the left will work against the left.
Well, if Barack Obama is for TPP, maybe I'll bring a TPP.
Hey, if Hillary Clinton's for gutten welfare, maybe we should gut welfare.
Hey, if we should deregulate Wall Street, that's going to be good for our economy.
If Barack Obama says we should pass TPP, maybe we can't.
Maybe we got to do these kind of trade deals.
Maybe we have to.
So at least we don't have that anymore.
So that's a good.
That's also a positive.
So don't freak out.
Start organizing.
We'll see what happens.
Other people have predicted that Trump will fracture the Republican Party as president.
We're going to find out if that happens.
We'll see if he can govern.
He showed no evidence that he was able to even get along with people in his own party at all.
He alienates, pushes them away.
So we'll see what happens.
I'm saying don't freak out.
Start organizing.
In two years, the progressives show up at the polls and off-year elections.
And then in two more years, we get a real progressive.
Maybe we have maybe Elizabeth Warren runs in four years.
There's going to be a lot of ugliness, but there was a lot of ugliness already, meaning they already took away habeas corpus, meaning we already have half the people in the country poor, meaning that we're already cracking the heads of peaceful protesters, meaning that Wall Street is not going to be re-regulated.
It will crash again.
So now the Republicans own everything.
So now if people are angry, they only have one party to be angry at, and that's the Republicans.
Now they have to deliver.
Now they can't just obstruct.
Now they have to actually legislate.
They have to actually make people's lives better.
And you know they're not going to, and I know they're not going to.
So now it is time for progressives to come together.
Now it is time.
The one good thing is we don't have half the left working against us.
We don't have half the left trying to get us to accept right-wing corporatist policies.
Now we can all stand up together against Donald Trump and all the stuff he's going to try to pass or push.
The power has always been in the people's hands.
You know, we keep voting for Democrats.
And look what they did.
Look what Bill Clinton did.
What has Barack Obama done?
Every four years, they go to the African-American community and say, we're going to make your lives better.
And every four years, it gets a little worse.
And that's why people in Wisconsin, Detroit, and Milwaukee didn't come out for Hillary Clinton.
It's time for progressives.
We're all going to be united going forward.
There's an ugly face on the neoliberalism and neocon policies.
There's an ugly face.
It's easier to oppose now.
Those are the positives.
Lots of negatives.
Those are the positives.
What's happening next Saturday, November 19th?
There's a live Jimmy Dore show at the Hollywood Improv.
Get your tickets over at JimmyDoorComedy.com.
We're going to have a special guest, super fun.
That's next Saturday, November 19th, 8 p.m. show.
It's at the Improv Lab right there on Melrose and Crescent Heights in Hollywood.
Some people say it's West Hollywood.
Where does West Hollywood really start?
La Brea?
Who knows?
Maybe it's West Hollywood.
It's at the world famous improv.
Next Saturday, November 19th, 8 p.m.
Tickets are 10 bucks.
Go over to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
We're going to have a blast.
See you then.
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*Bell rings*
Hello, this is Jimmy.
Hey, this is Chris Christie.
Oh, hey, so listen, I wanted to talk to you, Chris, because I don't know.
I'm a little worried in a sense that it seems like you and Rudy Giuliani are in line for the Attorney General to head this country's NSA surveillance state.
Is that true?
I am not at liberty at this time to say anything on that matter, but I've been hearing things.
You've been hearing things?
What kind of things you've been hearing?
Yeah, things.
Specifically, that you're late on a cop payment and your account at JCPenneys is delinquent.
Oh, and how's that rash?
Are you nuts?
Whoa.
Hey, wait a minute.
I don't have an account at JCPenney's.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Rash?
Yeah, left-nut.
Stage left-nut, to be exact.
That's an NSA term.
Too many times when you spy on a guy's bare nutsack, the transcriber gets left and right wrong.
It's like when you look at your eyes in a mirror, is that my left one or my right one?
And why aren't they pointed in the same direction?
Things like that happen a lot.
That's why we have a specific nutsack shot at every cubicle with our outsourced surveillance technicians.
That's an invasion of privacy, Chris, and I'm sure it's illegal in most democracies.
Look, you ain't got nothing to worry about if you're innocent.
Whoa, that's not innocent of what, by the way, having a skin rash?
On your left nut.
This is disgusting.
Are you watching my wife, too?
No.
But I do have three cameras on your refrigerator.
I'm a big man with a healthy, healthy appetite.
We need to be everywhere, Jimmy.
11-8 changed everything.
Where were you when you first heard about 11-8?
I was searching in your closet for your passport?
Yeah, I saw you.
Can't keep no secrets in an open society, Jimmy.
It's unlawful.
No, no, it isn't.
Okay, but so what?
We have prisons to fill up again.
That Mexican wall ain't gonna fund itself.
Oops.
I didn't say that.
Don't tell Donald.
I'll remove your bidet cam as a favor.
But I knew it.
What makes you think you'll get appointed Attorney General, Chris?
I mean, what about Bridgegate?
Witnesses get the flu a lot this time of year.
Why are they so careless with their health?
I don't know.
It's a mystery.
He has not confirmed.
Donald didn't want to make any cabinet choices without first talking to the Russians and Monsanto and Goldman Sachs and BP and GE and AT ⁇ T and Time Warner, now known as Spectrum.
It's a lot of things to check on.
I'd like to thank Hillary Clinton, however, and also Barack Obama.
What?
You want to thank them for all of us?
What kind of Hillary Clinton voted for the Patriot Act, which allowed us to set up a surveillance state to begin with?
And if Barack Obama comes in and then he repeals ape's purpose to make it easier for us to put people in jail who didn't without a trial.
So believe me, we wouldn't be able to do any of this stuff.
If me and Giuliani and Donald Trump have seen further, it's because we've been standing on the shoulders of giants.
And believe me, you've got to be a giant for me to stand on your shoulders.
Oh, that's right.
I remember people warned everybody.
Yeah, it's okay if Barack Obama has this power, but who's going to be the next guy?
And now the next guy is you and Donald Trump.
Yeah, you never saw that coming, did you?
No.
It's okay for Barack Obama to do it because his wife is so elegant.
And listen to me, Jimmy.
You just go out there and try to protest.
You try it, and you see how fast we throw your fucking ass in jail.
Without a trial.
Anyway, I gotta go.
Donald Trump, he's meeting with the president right now, and he wants me and Giuliani kind of out of the way to not to dub up to work.
So he put a plate of goba ghoul in the back of his limo to keep us out of the way.
I gotta get there before Giuliani eats it all.
All right, Chris.
Thanks for talking.
Chris, thanks.
We know we're thinking of you.
Oh, don't worry, Jimmy.
We know what you're thinking.
No!
*Mario plays*
So there's lots to blame to go around for what happened.
Of course, I think most of the blame lies with the establishment Democrats who decided to choose a corporatist who was one of the most unpopular politicians in history over a populist.
Look what happened.
The Republican Party nominated and ran a populist, and the Democrats ran a corporatist establishment figure.
Supposed to be the other way.
So I also want to talk about the media.
I don't want to let them off the hook.
We did a story with Tavis Smiley recently where he said he's not letting the media off the hook because they elevated Trump and they normalized him.
They're so clueless, the media.
Here's Keith Ellison from last year, 2015.
He was on with George Snuffalopagus and a panel of people.
All I want to say is that anybody from the Democratic side of the fence who thinks that who's terrified of the possibility of President Trump better vote, better get active, better get involved because this man has got some momentum.
And we better be ready for the fact that he might be leading the Republican ticket next.
I know you don't believe that, but I want to go on.
Sorry to laugh.
Next week.
You know what I mean?
Those are the people who are informing us.
Those are the people who are informing us.
Those are millionaires who hang out with the people they're supposed to be exposing and investigating.
Completely out of touch with what's really happening.
Don't really know what's wrong with globalization and outsourcing of Jobs don't really get what's wrong with neoliberalism.
Remember that there he is last year sounding the alarm about Trump.
I know you don't really believe that.
Sorry, George.
We had Jesse Ventura in Minnesota, win the governorship.
Nobody thought he was going to win.
I'm telling you, stranger things have happened.
Keith Ellison letting you know.
Everybody, we're going to talk one more time about the election results.
And I'm just going to show you the numbers, our raw numbers, okay?
So Donnie Tynahan's got 59 million votes.
Hillary Clinton got 60 million votes.
She got more votes than the guy who's going to be president.
Why?
Because 400 years ago.
Because 200 years ago, when we started this government, we let a bunch of sophilitic white slave owners write into the Constitution that we wouldn't have direct elections of our president.
Why?
Because they didn't want democracy.
They wanted white landowners to pick our leaders.
And we still hang on to that today.
And there's a good reason for it.
It's because Americans are fucking stupid.
And they let shit happen to them and they roll over and take it.
They're going to take this.
Hillary Clinton got more.
This is the second time.
And it's the first time this happened this century in 2000.
We got the Iraq war.
Now I wonder where we're.
And nobody's saying shit about it again, Jim.
No one's upset about the Electoral College.
No one is saying shit about it.
It's crazy.
It's a crazy system.
The guy who gets, the person who gets more votes loses.
And if that was another country, do you know how much we would be laughing at them?
Do you know how much you're like, could you imagine, yeah, Russia, Putin got less votes, but somehow he's still president.
What?
That's not a democracy.
That's what we would be saying.
But no, it's here in the land of the free and the brave, except we still have a holdover, a fucking electoral system from when half the country was slaves.
We still have that.
I don't know.
I think North Dakota should have almost as much influence as California.
Yeah, as far as, and then the Senate, it's the same thing.
We have this crazy thing called the Senate, which is really the House of Lords.
Because North Dakota, South Dakota, Nebraska, Montana, they have about 15 people living in those states.
They get just as many representatives in the Senate as California.
How many millions of people live in California?
How many people live in Montana?
There's less people in Montana than in my congressional district that somehow they get two senators.
That's why the country's fucked up.
That's why Mitch McConnell can oppose Barack Obama for eight years straight because it's not real representation.
That's just white power.
That's what that is, the Senate, white power.
And some people still to this day argue.
I was on a podcast where there was a Hillary supporter arguing for the Electoral College the day before the election.
I wonder how he feels now.
And the reasons they gave were just stupid.
The same old bullshit reasons.
Well, then if we don't have the Electoral College, then no one would go campaign in rural states.
You mean they wouldn't go campaign where no one lives?
They wouldn't go campaign where no one lives.
So now what we have is they only campaign in like six states, six swing states or so.
They still only go to a handful of states because of the Electoral College.
And then guess what else?
One of the bonuses of the Electoral College is we don't get to directly elect the president.
One-third of the government, by the way, we don't get to do that.
That's one of the bonuses.
One of the bigger bonuses that the guy who gets less votes gets to become president.
That's not democracy.
I don't know what the hell that is.
That's not democracy when the person who gets less votes gets to be the winner.
Newt Gingrich was against the Electoral College.
Well, I bet he's for it now.
Yeah.
I mean, whoever wins with the Electoral College, they're for it.
And when they lose with it, they're against it.
We've had five elections since 2000.
In this century, we've had five elections, two of them, 40%.
The guy who got less votes is the president.
And everybody's like, get rid of third parties.
Rachel Maddow, get rid of third parties.
Get rid of third party.
Less voices, just the corporate voices, just the pro-war, pro-corporate voices.
That's all we need.
Because I'm a super duper.
How much money do you think Rachel Maddow has?
$50 million in the bank?
I bet I bet $50 million.
I don't know.
I think it was $17.
Well, she's got to get at least $6 or $7 million a year.
Yeah.
So she's been doing that show since 2008, right?
At least.
Yeah, I believe so.
So that's eight years, seven times eight, $56 million.
Maybe your point is she's more than rich enough to be comfortable.
Way, way, way more than rich enough.
She's so rich she could pretend that Jill Stein had an influence on this fucking election with a straight face.
So one of the big failings of this electoral cycle was the news media.
And they propped up Trump.
They put on his speeches.
Half the lefty journals were writing puff pieces for Hillary Clinton.
So this is from Columbia Journalism Review.
They say, hey, here's the return of journalism as malcontent.
They go, we need to embrace, even relish our legacy as malcontents and troublemakers, people who are willing to say things that make everyone else uncomfortable.
Yeah, that's not what corporate journalism is all about.
It's all about access.
It's all about being nice to people so they'll come on your show.
And then when they come on your show, you're nice to them again.
You don't try to humiliate them or expose them so they'll come back on your show again.
That's what access journalism is.
And he's saying, now it's time that we go back to making people uncomfortable.
He says that kind of reporting needs to be accompanied by a return to journalism's oppositional roots.
It has done reporters no good to think of themselves as part of the establishment or a megaphone for the conventional wisdom.
They are part of the establishment.
That's the whole thing.
They are part of the establishment.
And we saw in the WikiLeaks emails, right, that they all get, they go to these parties off the record, news people with powerful politicians.
They just go to cocktail party, hang out.
I'm not going to say anything.
I'm just going to hang out.
Those people are supposed to be afraid of you.
They're not supposed to want to hang out with you, especially the most powerful people.
So hopefully that's what happens.
I don't see that coming.
That was from the Ben Mackowicz's Columbia School of Journalism.
I hope that happens.
I hope we get some malcontents.
I hope we get some people in corporate media.
That's not happening.
That's not happening.
It's not happening.
But it would be nice.
But it happens here.
That's just what this is about, right?
We're not bought.
We're not owned by the six major media companies.
We have independents.
Thanks for being a member.
Thanks for being a subscriber.
And that's what this is all about.
So we're going to do that.
We're going to be the opposition.
We're going to go back to journalism's oppositional roots.
We've been there the whole time.
And no, we do not see my, I do not see myself as part of the establishment.
No, I see myself as an outsider, even with journalism.
I see myself as an outsider.
I'm not one of them.
I don't want to be one of them.
I don't want to go to their parties.
I don't want to be in with them.
I want to be here in my studio making fun of them.
So, everybody, we're talking about the president's reaction to Donnie Tanahan's becoming president.
And here's what our current president had to say.
And this is what he had to say.
I'll just play a little bit of it.
People here in the United States and all around the world.
Now, everybody is sad when their side loses an election.
But the day after, we have to remember that we're actually all on one team.
This is an intramural scrimmage.
We're not Democrats first.
We're not Republicans.
Okay, I'm going to stop it.
This is just garbage.
I mean, whatever.
I know he's got to come out and calm people and what have you.
But, you know, there was a guy who just ran around calling you not a citizen, race-baiting you for eight years.
He's threatened Muslims.
He's told people to get punched out at his own thing.
He's threatened everybody with physical violence.
He's normalizing sexual predators.
This is a tough time.
So don't act like it's just any other goddamn election because it's not just any other goddamn election.
Something just fucking happened that is scaring the shit out of people.
And please don't use sports metaphors.
Oh, this is an intramural.
What do you, again, again, pay no attention?
I don't know.
You know, whatever.
I understand he's got to do things to calm the country down.
But here's what I think you should do.
It's what Bernie Sanders said.
And here's what Bernie Sanders said.
He said, to the degree that Mr. Trump is serious about pursuing policies that improve the lives of working families in this country, I and other progressives are prepared to work with him.
Okay, that's a pretty good message.
To the degree that he pursues racist, sexist, xenophobic, and anti-environment policies, we will vigorously oppose him.
That's all you got to say.
Yeah.
That's all you got to say.
That's all you got to say.
Hey, if he's going to do things that help the country, we're on board.
If he's going to bring that crap into the White House, we're going to oppose him as hard as we can.
That's what Barack Obama should have said to people.
And people will be like, oh, thank God we're going to have the president on our side instead of the president pretending like he doesn't understand what the fuck is going on, which is what he's doing.
Jim, am I?
I don't know.
Am I misreading his speech?
Was he not?
Was he?
I understand he's trying to not excite people and make sure because there was people out in the streets last night and what have.
But this is before that.
He said all this stuff.
And then people went out in the streets.
Why?
Because I don't think Barack Obama spoke to anything.
What do you think?
I think he's being more.
He's being.
Both sides do it.
Obama the doormat again.
Yeah.
Obama the doormat.
And it's not working here because that's not reassuring.
What Bernie just said is reassuring.
That's reassuring.
Yeah.
That's reassuring.
Hey, we're not going to roll over for this guy.
Just because he won doesn't mean we're not going away.
When Barack Obama was like, hey, come on, folks.
It's okay.
Everything's all pretend.
Remember all that shit I said last week?
Remember all the stuff Hillary Clinton said?
Remember how we scared everybody about nuclear war and him being with the Russians and him the end of everything?
That the only thing standing between you and the end of the fucking world was Hillary Clinton?
Remember how we said all that?
Forget it.
And comparing it to intermobile sports is like comparing it to both sides have.
are playing with the same instruments and the same motivations for fair play.
No, that's bullshit.
One side wants to annihilate the other side.
Yes.
Exactly.
One wants to throw the other side in prison.
And never have to play again.
You know?
Yes.
So, again, Bernie Sanders nails it.
Barack Obama's a mealy-mouthed fucking doormat.
Exactly.
Now go push the TPP, Barack.
Now go try to push it in your lame duck.
And then scratch your head.
Why corporate Democrats keep getting their fucking ass handed to them.
Die, die.
You just got your ass handed.
Your legacy is wiped out.
Because you handed the presidency over to a fucking racist.
Wiped out.
You.
Because you're such a goddamn corporatist.
Because you didn't do a fucking thing when you had the House and the Senate.
You had both.
And instead of fucking going over to Ben Nelson and saying, look, I need your vote.
I'm your president.
I need your vote.
Lyndon Johnson got Southern Democrats to vote for the Civil Rights Bill.
And they knew that that was the end of their political career.
And Lyndon Johnson said, I'm your president.
I need your vote.
I'm going to need it.
And I know what this means.
But you're doing the right thing.
And you're on the right side of history.
And those people voted for the Civil Rights Act.
And the Democrats have been wiped out in the South ever since.
And those motherfuckers did it anyway.
They did the right thing.
You know who did it?
Barack Obama.
He didn't go to Ben Nelson.
He didn't make him pass the public option.
He didn't even offer a single payer.
Whatever you guys will let me have.
Whatever the corporations will let me have.
That's what we're going to give the people.
And right now, people's Obamacare premiums are going up 24% across the board this year.
You wonder why people didn't get off their ass to vote for more corporatism bullshit.
Especially when Hillary Clinton stands on her tippy toes and screams at the top of her lungs that universal health care will never happen.
And that myth, that line that they always slap back at you.
Well, you just, you know, you're unicorn dust.
You're just fairy dust.
Guess who was it?
It was Hillary Clinton supporters.
Because she'll never be fucking elected.
She's the worst politician in 100 years.
You just want perfection and purity.
That's impossible.
No, I don't want perfection and purity.
I want somebody who will fight for it, though.
Yes.
Because when you fight for it, then you tend to get better things.
Yes.
Start from your position and then negotiate.
Yeah.
You know, there's a quote, and I forget who said this.
They said, I don't fight fascists because I think I'm going to win.
I fight fascists because they're fascists.
And that's what Bernie Sanders is saying.
To that degree, he pursues these policies.
We are vigorously opposing him.
Barack Obama didn't have any of that.
I understand.
Again, I get people are going to.
I know what people are going to say in the comments.
He can't say that.
He could have said a lot of different shit.
And again, he walks away and everyone just felt.
I felt empty after his speech.
Like, just emptiness.
This election, you refer to it as, you diminish it as an intramural game?
And somehow we're all supposed to, oh, I guess we'll all feel better.
I don't know.
I'm sorry.
Again, I know people are going to get on me about this.
But there's just no end to this.
And now he's going to go push the TPP.
Did he scream about how we don't have a Supreme Court justice?
Did he scream about how, no, now they're going to have to govern.
I've just you know it's just it's it's anyway there it is again bernie's getting it done in two years we gotta we gotta get rid of these corporate democrats we have bernie sanders tulsi gabbard we have elizabeth warren and we start real progressives we had we had some progressive wins uh in the House and the Senate.
We did.
We had some progressive wins in the House and Senate.
We did.
And that's this year when Hillary Clinton got six million fewer votes than Barack Obama did in 2012.
Six million fewer.
Six million fewer fucking people showed up to vote for Hillary Clinton than showed up for Barack Obama.
And people are saying that she lost because of racism.
We elected Barack Obama twice.
A lot of those people who voted for Barack didn't vote for Hillary Clinton.
It's not fucking racism.
You goddamn assholes.
It's not just like Brexit.
Oh, it's right.
It's such an easy way to dismiss all of this.
Just sexism and racism.
Stick head in the sand.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Stupid assholes, the same assholes we told that Hillary was a loser last year are saying stupid shit again now.
The same stupid fucking idiots.
It's mind-blowing to me.
Is it mind-blowing to you, Jim, to see those people saying that stuff?
I kind of expect it.
I guess we should expect it.
Rachel Maddow tweeting out, Jill Stein was her fault.
Literally.
Yeah.
I mean, this speaks to what he's going to be like after he leaves office.
Barack Obama?
Yeah.
He'll be mealy mouthed after he leaves office.
I'm not supposed to get involved.
Of anybody in the world who has more potential positive benefit to fixing money in politics and make it's a guy like him with a long life ahead of him and his personal characteristics.
But he's going to be one of the, he's going to be the same quiet, sleepy guy that talked about the Dakota thing.
Yeah.
Trump is, you know, the folks put him in office and he's going to, you know, shoot some nukes at Europe.
Just the way he promised.
The American people voted America.
So I think we give him a track.
I think we have to give him his due.
How do we give him a track tonight?
So we let him do his ridiculous.
It's badminton and both sides have a record.
Both sides have a record and we hit the badminton.
We hit the shuttle cock.
The shuttle cock over the over the fence.
The net.
So it's time to get rid of these.
Barack Obama.
The reason why Trump is president, a big reason is because eight years of you helped people zero as far as income inequality.
Zero.
By the way, you're a Peace Prize winner.
We're bombing seven different countries.
We're bombing Afghanistan for 15 years straight.
Five more years we get a gold watch, Jim.
We're bombing Yemen now at the behest of Saudi Arabia.
We're helping with genocide of the Houthis in freaking Yemen.
Income inequality is greater.
This is like medieval times as far as income inequality in the United States.
It's worse now than during the Gilded Age.
And you remember what happened?
Teddy Roosevelt came along and broke up all the monopolies.
So we need somebody to break up all the media companies, break up all the fossil fuel companies.
We need somebody to break up all the telecommunication companies.
We need somebody to break up all the banks.
That's what we need.
So we need real revolution because in 2009, when Barack Obama became president, it was a turning point in America.
And as the book, Listen Liberals says, as Thomas Frank says, we came to a turning point in America in 2009 and America failed to turn.
Barack Obama literally went to Wall Street and says, I'm going to protect you.
I'm the one standing between you and the mob with the pitchforks.
And he did protect them.
And he never did a jobs bailout.
And he let the cops crack the heads of peaceful protesters on Occupy Wall Street.
And how did they respond to Occupy Wall Street with a jobs program?
No.
He let them take the union away from teachers in Wisconsin and they cut unemployment benefits.
This is the result.
This is the result.
And Hillary Clinton calling the nurses union a fringe group.
The nurses union.
A fringe group.
Good word.
This is the death.
Hillary was just exposed the rot inside the left.
Barack Obama covered it up with his pretty face and his likable personality.
He covered it up.
You didn't see the rot inside.
He's pushing the TPP still like, I still kind of like him, even though he's fucking me as hard as he possibly can.
I still kind of like him.
So now that's gone.
Now that the pretty face on the rot inside the Democratic Party is gone, and all you see is the fucking rot.
Wow.
Ending the show on a heavy note there.
Hey, guess what?
Next week, Saturday, November 19th, make sure you come get your tickets at jimmydoorcomedy.com.
We're doing a live show.
I don't know why I'm talking like my morning DJ voice right now, but I am.
We're doing a live show next Saturday, November 19th at the Hollywood Improv.
You know about it.
Go to jimmydoorcomedy.com, come get your tickets.
10 bucks.
Hey, and by the way, get the premium of the Jimmy Dore show.
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We did.
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There was an election this week.
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Thanks, everybody who does that, who is a premium member and helps support the show.
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Hey, if guess that today's show was written, that's right.
It was written by Mike McRae, Jim Earl, Mark Van Landuit, Steph Samarano.
All the voices today performed by the one and the only, the inimitable, Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
Until next week, this is Jimmy Dorst saying you be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Don't freak out.
I'm not kidding.
Don't freak out.
Do not do not and do not not freak out.
Do not freak out.
I'm not kidding.
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