All Episodes
Previous Next
March 8, 2014 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:00:01
20140308_The_Jimmy_Dore_Show_3-7-14
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program, the Jimmy Dore show.
Making the rounds recently is Bill Crystal, or as I like to call him, Smiley McKillkill.
If you don't know who Bill Crystal is, he's the editor of the Weekly Standard and a TV pundit.
If you look up the term warmonger in the dictionary, you'll find a photo of him smiling at you.
This fucker can't stop smiling, particularly when he's advocating to send your children to die in an unnecessary war.
Iraq, Afghanistan, Russia, Syria, North Korea, Iran.
Just name a country and Smiley McKillkill wants to go to war with it.
Crystal got everything about the Iraq war wrong, from WMDs to ties with Al-Qaeda to the occupation itself.
Crystal says we need to liberate Iran.
From what?
The Iranians?
And Bill Crystal is a big supporter of Don't Call Me a Quitter Sarah Palin.
This week, Crystal said we need to humiliate Vladimir Putin, and he welcomed re-microwaving the Cold War and those dirty Russian commies.
Except the right hasn't noticed that they're not communists anymore.
But if you are a communist nation with slave labor like China, right-wingers celebrate sending American jobs there.
Here's the point.
Crystal is brought onto the cable news shows as an expert, an expert in getting everything wrong, that is.
His entire career in political analysis discredits itself.
And yet, he continues to be legitimized by the cable news shows because he's a well-paid fixture with the Beltway think tanks.
There's nothing so stupid he could say and won't get welcome back.
He's never shamed by the mainstream media.
Instead, he's on TV again and again, advocating the spilling of blood with a smile.
And when he's not grinning, he has a look like my dog gives me when he's left his shit in the corner of the room.
Finally, the aggression in Ukraine has raised a question.
Vladimir Putin is a crony capitalist, anti-gay, anti-protest, religious man who runs a surveillance state that illegally invades sovereign nations.
So why doesn't the right wing love him?
It's the Jimmy Dore show.
the show for the kind of people It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say.
It's hard to talk on your TV.
And now, here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore!
Hey, everybody, welcome to this week's Jimmy Dore show.
I'm joined in the studio.
To my right, hilarious comedian.
You know him from the Rubin Report.
It's Dave Rubin.
Hey, Dave, how are you?
Jimmy, it is good to be back on the Jimmy Door show.
It's been about a year.
It's been about a year.
Last time I had you on, we were complaining about Chris Matthews and his anti-war stuff.
Guess what?
We almost did it again.
Now I can see all you hateful things about Chris Matthews.
Yes, yes.
But we're back, and maybe we can make a Chris Matthews joke one way.
I'm going to certainly do it.
Tweety.
All right, over to my left, my favorite host of Turner Classic Movies of the two hosts.
You are definitely my favorite.
Thank you, Brady.
It's Ben Makowitz, ladies and gentlemen.
Hi, Ben.
Touching.
That means a lot to me.
Thank you very much.
I'm an ageist.
Also in the studio with me across the desk is our host of Comedy to Everything Else and our resident Latina.
It's Steph Zamarano.
Hey, Steph, how are you?
Ola.
Oh, I loved when you say Ola.
And I'm a proud member of my union.
Yes, nice, very nice.
Next to her, a hilarious Japanese man from Team Yasamura.
It's Robert Yasamura.
Hey, Robert.
Ola.
All right.
He's also a proud member of my union.
Yeah.
And how do you, do you know how to say hello in Japanese?
Ohio.
Oh, Ohio?
All right.
That's very nice.
That is the extent of my Japanese.
That's actually where we got the name of the state, Ohio, from.
Oh, really?
It was founded by a group of Japanese settlers called the Kasichs.
17th century.
The Bonners, the Boehners.
The Boehners and the Kasichs.
Boehnerson, K-Well.
All right, let's do some jokes before we get to the jokes.
Shall we?
I'm sure you did, Ben, right?
Yes, did watch.
Oh, we were all watching it.
We watched it together.
I mean, it was just a few days ago.
That's right.
We were high that you were here.
I was a little high.
And I also love that everyone can get totally hammered at the Young Turks, but Smoking Pot is still frowned on.
Still, it's like, yeah, we talk, we say we're for it on this show, but not really in practice.
Okay.
So I have to go outside.
I leave every five minutes.
I have to go outside.
You have a peeing problem.
I do.
I do.
You might have one.
P stands for pot.
Okay.
I don't know if you saw it, but so 12 years a slave.
By the way, the birthers were right.
The birthers were right.
12 years of slave director Steve McQueen, not born in America.
Take that Oscar away.
Not allowed to win an Oscar.
Do you like how they had to make a point of saying he's not African American?
They had to keep reminding everybody.
Yes, you know.
We don't know what we're saying about those people.
They're upset about a black guy making a movie about slaves in America for some reason.
I don't know why.
They were upset.
But see, by the way, you know, some Americans say that we're apathetic in America.
But yet we all came together in collective outrage over John Travolta's mispronouncing a name.
One people, one cause.
That's not nothing.
And by the way, breaking news.
I just got some breaking news in my ear.
Ted Nugent, we all familiar?
He just shit himself to avoid serving in a hashtag war.
That's Ted Nugent.
Breaking news, Ben.
That's Ted Nugent.
And by the way, Scientology is a weird religious cult.
Had somebody come up to me today in the Ralphs right after they go, you know, Scientology is a weird religious cult.
That person also had some ashes smeared on their forehead.
I don't know what the hell that was about.
See?
I'm making fun of them.
Yeah.
You shot at the same Ralphs as Tom Cruise?
As Tom Cruise?
Yes, I do.
Pretty good.
Why do you say?
Oh, I got it.
He's a shot.
I got you.
No.
You know, I don't put together stuff very well.
It doesn't quite make sense anyway.
CPAC is happening.
If you don't know what CPAC is, you're missing the best.
It's the Comic-Con of Hate.
It's the Comic.
It is the Comic.
It's like Comic-Con, Robert, but different arguments.
Like the arguments you hear at CPAC are, who'd be better at avoiding military service, Dr. Doom or Lex Luther?
That's the kind of stuff.
Goes with the Ted Nugent joke I just did.
And by the way, Sarah Palin, everybody's making a big deal out of her getting the Ukraine thing, right?
Yeah, she's a regular Nostradamus, that one.
And, you know, taking advice from Sarah Palin on foreign policy is like taking advice on John Travolta on public speaking.
Two Travolta jokes in the monologue.
You know, Travolta was on Letterman some years ago, not that long ago, and he talked about how he loves coming to New York and he'd gone to Yankee Stadium and he'd got great seats, like, you know, like the owner's box Seats, the Steinbrenner seats or something.
He was so close.
He was like, I could have a regular conversation, he said, with Derek Jedder.
It's a true story.
And because he's such a big star, like Letterman was like, you can't, you can't, nobody can say anything.
Like, the whole crowd, everyone knows he just made this horrible mistake.
And everyone's like, yeah.
Yeah.
But his other favorite Yankee, Alex Robert Guis.
It's a shame that guy's not coming back.
Yeah.
He was also my favorite golfer was Chai Chai Robert Guise.
Anyway, what's coming up by today's shows?
The right wing has a weird hatred for 12 years a slave.
We're going to take a look at it.
Also, John Kerry says something incredibly ironic about Ukraine and America.
Plus, Rudy Giuliani is still a piece of shit.
He weighs in.
Lindsey Graham, he knows the real cause of Ukraine and has something to do with Benghazi.
Plus, CPAC happened.
We're going to take some of our moments from today's CPAC speeches, Chris Christie, Paul Ryan, and Ted Cruz.
And the world's biggest douchebag, Donald Trump, also has something to say.
Plus, we got phone calls today from Chris Christie calls in.
We have Ted Cruz calling in.
We have, oh, Representative Peter King, he's going to call in.
Barack Obama calls in, plus a lot more.
Oh, Luke Russert, the world's most successful intern, gives us a call.
That's later on today on the Jimmy Dore Show.
*outro music*
Jimmy, Barry Obama.
Now, if you're listening, John McKing, I have a message for you.
Lick my asshole.
Get back there and start tossing my salad, old man.
And maybe that'll shut you up long enough for the real people to do some talking.
Loud-mouthed old man, smell a motherfucker.
Well, I want your opinion about Ukraine.
Tell you what.
I'll put you in a tiger cage and have an Asian guy get it.
I got some serious geopolitical shit going down.
And the last thing I need, Senator Flamethrower yapping in the background.
That's the last thing I need.
You know, that asshole called me feckless.
One thing about me, I have got thick.
I'm full of feck, man.
I can shoot back out my eyeballs like Superman.
Motherfucker called me feckless shit.
I'm facing down Vlad Putin here.
The bare-chested lunatic with nukes.
Seriously, I once saw this guy rape a puma.
Have you heard some of his rationalizations for invading Crimea?
Oh, we thought they wanted us to do that.
I thought that was our country.
We just forgot to be there.
We heard there were some bad kids there, and we were all like, hey, get out of here, you kid.
And it was this, who was my guy on this?
Terry.
John Pate, Drian Kerry.
Tell you, man, this guy missed his calling as a middle school principal.
Tell me you haven't thought that.
Like when he's giving a speech, aren't you all like, where's the assembly going to start?
You know what I'm saying?
Oh, okay, look, man.
I got to go.
I got some real Foreign Affairs people come by with some actual answers that don't include sending in Chuck Norris.
So, Mr. Door, tear down this phone call.
The Jimmy Door show is available as a podcast for free on iTunes.
Or for other ways to subscribe, go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
And while you're there, you can listen to past episodes and you can comment on them too.
Remember, Jimmy spells his last name, D-O-R-E, jimmydorecomedy.com.
Hi, now, if you're like me, you after watching the Academy Awards, you immediately went to Rush Limbaugh's website to get his take on things.
I certainly did.
And, you know, 12 Years a Slave won for Best Picture, and I was worried that Rush Limbaugh wouldn't take that opportunity to say something ridiculously racist.
Well, let's see his take on it.
Ready?
That movie didn't win.
There's no way that movie was not going to win.
If it was the only thing that movie won, it was going to win Best Picture.
There was no way.
It didn't matter if it was good or bad.
I haven't seen it.
It was worded in the title.
Slave.
So, you know, I guess Rush has built up a lot of anger over the years because, you know, he has to sit there and take it, you know, after all those slave movies have been keeping all those white movies down.
And so he's just exploding right now.
He can't hold it in.
I like that he hasn't seen the movie, but he's also pretty sure that it shouldn't have won.
His righteous indignation about something winning that he hasn't seen is incredible.
And why?
What is his hatred of the fact that it might have been a good movie?
You know what I mean?
He's making a point of telling you, I haven't seen this thing, but it is so awful.
And not only is it awful, but these left-wing socialists, they love it because they're playing to the slave crowd.
Like, what is he saying?
Well, it's like, like he said, I didn't even see it.
But believe me, it's shitty because it's got a lot of black people in it.
So it can't be good.
He is not good.
Isn't that what he says?
He's not a good man.
What do you need to do?
You're the movie guy.
Why does he why don't they take the parts of 12 years a slave that should be theirs, right?
Like, I mean, like, like you'd think they'd be like, why are we hearing that Lincoln's a Republican?
Right?
Yeah.
You know, that this was when America, like we all banded together.
A white guy came in, like, who helped him out?
A white guy, Brad Pitt, a handsome white guy.
Like, there's so many things he could do for that that I would, I'm just, I'm sort of surprised by.
And then the cluelessness about the part about him not seeing it.
Like, again, it's that moment of like he's proud.
Yeah.
Like, you know, I haven't seen it.
I'm not going to go see a movie about a bunch of blacks with a bunch of blacks playing a bunch of blacks.
It's just too black.
It's too black for me.
Yeah.
I'm a big fat white guy.
Yeah, but the reason why Rush Limbaugh hates it is because he is part of a crowd of people that have a vested interest in whitewashing history.
Yes.
And so he's, he, a lot of his constituency, they really need to believe that slavery was much more benign.
You know, they also need to believe that we didn't put Native Americans on reservations.
Right.
We didn't put Japanese people in internment camps.
We didn't kill Chinese people making our railroads.
I agree with you on all that, except the Japanese internment camp thing.
But I got to be honest, it was a love fest for my grandparents.
Well, they got the good songs, Don't Fence Me In.
They seemed happy.
And the reason why, Robert, they have to do that.
They have to pretend that those things didn't happen and slavery wasn't as horrible as it was, because then they Would have to examine everything the United States does with a critical eye.
And that's the last thing they want to do.
It makes them uncomfortable to look at the United States with a critical eye, right?
Because they're immature, they have a juvenile worldview, and anything that contradicts that the United States is the greatest thing ever, they don't know how to deal, they can't process it.
Am I wrong about this?
I think you're right, but I would add to that that a lot of it has to do with their bullshit.
That everything they do is based on the Constitution and the Constitutional Loan.
And so what they have to be able to say is that the Constitution was perfect at its birth and has always been perfect.
Which is insane.
Yes.
But what they, so they have to whitewash slavery because it's included in the Constitution and had to be amended in order to get rid of slavery.
And so it's part of that entire nonsense because they have nothing.
They have nothing.
But they know that their constituency will go, yeah, we can get behind the Constitution.
Whatever's in the Constitution is by necessity good.
Well, here's my problem with the whole thing.
It's like, it just seems so childishly racist.
Like, it's not even a good point.
It's not even a good point.
That's what I mean.
It's like, like, like, just, I imagine the smart conservative would steal it.
Yeah, well, you know who freed the slave?
Lincoln.
He's a Republican.
Right.
You know, because he knew that people deserve the right to go out there on their own and forage in an open market and succeed.
Yeah, the party of ending slavery is the Republic.
He didn't do any of that.
He's just like, yeah, there's blacks in this movie, so it's got to suck.
It's got to suck.
And it's a threat to the things that I love.
You know, it was a good movie that had blacks.
A birth of a nation.
I like that movie.
That should have won.
That predated the Academy Awards.
They wouldn't vote for that now, though.
Liberals.
So here is, I mean, to me, I just don't know.
Yes, exactly, Ben.
What do you get out of having such childish racism?
But here's the part that might even be weirder.
This might even be the weirder clip where he just decides to hate Hollywood in general.
Play the next clip, Gilbert, and you'll see what I'm talking about.
Very subtle for the most part.
There were exceptions where it was in your face, but mostly very subtle political night.
It always is.
Everything to the left is political.
And it was filled with self-satisfaction and pats on the back and how important they all are and how compassionate, giving, caring, all of the adjectives they reserve exclusively to themselves and their goodness and their kindness and their decency.
And all of that.
And it was hokey in parts with Ellen DeGeneres passing out pizza to the first three rows and taking selfies and so forth and all that.
But I think they were.
There was no demonstrable political preaching from anybody, even so you got Zip Zero.
So who?
He's literally choking on his own bullshit.
It's bubbling out of him.
It's coming out of him and he's forcing it down.
It almost feels like there's like a rational human being, a thin, rational man inside.
A thin liberal is inside him trying to burst through his frog-like fat fucking neck.
What a disgusting.
He's such a disgusting piece.
It's so easy to say it's Holly.
There was nothing political about the night.
There really was nothing.
Ellen political.
Ellen is the most apolitical comedian on the planet.
She couldn't say anything controversial if she tried.
So to make it seem like Ellen.
But they were patting themselves on the back.
You know what it was?
It was an award show.
Gentlemen took their turn.
Gentlemen, there's an award show up there and they get awards.
They all vote for awards for each other and then give one.
Yeah, here.
Congratulations.
That's what you do.
That's the whole point.
Yeah, he did a John Elway, too.
If you notice, his whole point was there's the subtle political point.
There always is.
And then we fast forward 30 seconds later.
Really, you never know.
There's no politics in it at all.
The whole point was that there were politics in it.
You really contradicted himself immediately in the same way.
Whereas Elway did it instantly.
The next word is he took 30 seconds.
For him, if you say anything about slavery, that's political.
If you say anything about trans people or gay people, that's political, but that's not political.
Those are issues.
You know what I mean?
They're issues by themselves.
You can then argue about them politically, but there was none of that.
There was nothing political.
As I'm wondering.
The Ukraine thing that I guess what's his name said?
Jared Leto.
But that's barely.
That could have been conservative.
And anyone could have said it.
And I like that Jared Leto referred to it as the Ukraine, which is how we're supposed to say it.
Even though they say you're not.
I like saying that.
What's the word?
It's not the United States.
They go, oh, you're supposed to say Ukraine.
Well, I was in Ukraine.
Because you don't say the England, right?
But you do say the United States.
I don't know.
We're not supposed to say the.
You're not supposed to say the.
You're just supposed to say Ukraine.
But I like saying the.
So does Jared Leto.
It's kind of, it makes it its own.
Yeah.
It's their special thing because they don't have Crimea anymore.
Yeah, it's not the Crimea, that's for sure.
It's just Crimea.
We should start calling him the Rush Limbaugh because he's an entity of his own.
He's got his own gravity.
I think he has his own orbit.
That's for sure.
Some things that orbit him.
Yeah, I think it was like don't the words that the left has taken for themselves, giving, caring, kind, decent, the words they think will apply.
Like, well, maybe, maybe once do something kind, kind, giving, and decent, and then you can have it too.
But even words are free.
Even the way he said it, Ellen brought out pizza.
I think people like that.
He's just feeding you morons pizza because you all like pizza.
Like everything.
It's all such.
I thought he was going to go, and then Ellen brought on pizza.
That was the one bright spot.
Yeah, I prefer deep dishes.
I actually was surprised to just say outright, like, oh, it's so political and self-congratulatory.
I won't be here because I'm going to CPAC where we will be very political and self-congratulatory.
Yeah, yeah.
And you know, as I was listening to him rant like that about Hollywood, I'm like, so who are the listeners that he's appealing to with this anti-who listening to him in America doesn't like movies and movie stars, right?
Everybody likes movies and movies.
Hey, why not mock Victoria's Secret models next?
Oh, and those bitches on the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.
I'm sick of them.
Is there anything cool that you right-wing ass enjoy?
And no, smoking cigars and fucking third world prostitutes on an oxytocin high does not constitute cool behavior.
Oh, well, then nothing.
I didn't realize.
I felt like he came in Monday morning and his producer said, so you're going to do something on the Oscars?
And he was like, ah, crap.
I didn't write anything.
I got nothing.
I'll just talk about the thing.
You know, I was on a few years ago.
I was on Geraldo Rivera's show on the weekend, which still exists.
Jerry Rivers.
Joe's on Jerry Rivers show on the Fox News.
And I was debating John Gibson.
Oh, and what's the point of that guy?
He's crazy John Gibson.
He's on Fox Radio.
He's on Fox Radio.
Yeah.
And it was about the war on Hollywood.
And I was their guest to defend the war in Hollywood.
And it was Hollywood's disconnect with America.
And I was like, I don't know.
It's made more money than it ever has.
I think I was a terrible guest.
But I did what you would have liked.
I'm like, there's no war on Hollywood.
They love the movies.
Not everyone likes them, but as many as always did.
Like, when I liberal disconnect the movie, why don't people go see the line is always the movies that people really love, those aren't nominated for an Oscar.
To which the always response is, hey, man, we're not giving Jackie Collins a friggin Pulitzer.
Right?
John Grisham does it every year.
The people who sold the most books here.
Like, we talk about it.
Madonna's book sold $40 million worth.
It wasn't a great book.
Right.
It's not a great book.
You didn't win a prize.
You win the Booker Award.
Yeah, yeah.
The Promise-Driven Life or whatever.
The purpose of it.
The purpose of it, like best-selling book of all time, Outsold the Bible.
So Rick Warren.
I'm sure it's a great book, and I'm sure Rick Warren is full of wisdom.
His implication that you don't get morals from Hollywood.
You know what I mean?
You actually get bad morals from Hollywood is insane.
It was reminding me of the speech in Network when what's his name?
When Peter Finch goes crazy, and he says that this is just bullshit.
Hollywood will sell you anything as long as they're selling it to you.
So they're not selling you morals and they're not selling you immorality.
They'll sell you any piece of shit that you're willing to watch.
That's the truth of it.
So his whole premise is just makes no sense.
I'm with you.
Dave Ruben, you get the last word on this, unless you have something funny to say or back there.
He's not going to take it anymore.
You can't hear another last word.
I already had the last word.
I was giving that to you.
Hey, guess who called me?
It's a failed presidential candidate, Mitt Romney, gave me a call this week, and here it is.
Hello.
Hello.
Oh, yeah.
Jimmy, it's I, Mitt Romney, almost president of the United States.
Oh, hi, Governor.
I'm also the secret king of the Mormon Empire.
I didn't know that was a thing.
Jimmy, I wanted to call you and say for the record, I am so glad I am not president today.
Really?
What makes you say that, buddy?
Well, this whole Ukraine business is really scary.
True.
I didn't know things like that could still happen.
I thought Reagan had made the Ruskies our bitch.
Well, obviously not, Mitt.
I know.
And I gotta be honest, Jimmy, I'm not real great with confrontation.
Hello?
I don't know why that's so funny to me.
probably because of the way I said it.
Well, then, what made you think you'd be a good president, Mitt?
I don't know.
I mean, I am the product of a secret Mormon breeding program to create a president.
And of course, I was always told I was a living God who would someday be president and then bring about the end times.
So I just assumed I would be good at it.
Listen, can we go back to the breeding program?
But it turns out I am not a living God after all.
I'm just a man, an incredibly handsome man who gets his own planet when he dies.
Yes.
I've had a lot of time to reflect since losing the election, and I got to say, I am a happier man for it.
Well, that's great, Governor.
For instance, Jimmy, did you know I am incredibly wealthy?
I did know that, Governor.
Didn't you?
Honestly, I had never thought about it.
I mean, I always knew we had money, but what I didn't know was that other people don't.
Have you heard about these poor people?
I have, Governor.
Oh, it's terrible.
When they want to buy stuff, they can't because they're all poor and stuff.
Yeah, it's really terrible.
But I'm crazy rich.
Like, I could do anything I want.
That's kind of true.
I could kill a guy just to see what it's like, and I've got the money to cover that up.
That's probably not something you want to say out loud, Governor.
Oh, I could do some real Bond villain type stuff.
Like build a space laser and hold the world hostage.
I'm not sure that.
But I'll tell you one thing I can't do, Jimmy.
What's that?
Have a Coca-Cola.
You know, Governor, you could just try it, Coke.
Can't do it, Slim Jim.
It's not even like a big sin in the LDS church, is it?
It's a gateway drug, Jimmy.
I've seen it.
My great uncle Shem.
You had an uncle named Shem.
One day, yeah.
Well, one day it was hot out, and the only thing to drink was that Coca-Cola devil juice.
Well, he drank it all right.
And the next thing you know, he's drinking it once a week.
All of a sudden, he's not wearing the sacred garment, and he's watching sinful TV movies.
And then he was struck dead by a falling anvil.
Wade, an anvil?
Yes, or cancer.
The point is, I don't want to find myself all strung out in some cola den in Thailand.
Okay, then don't have the Coke, man.
I won't, Jimmy.
No matter how you tempt me with that beautiful, sweating red jam, I will remain strong and sip this delicious tap water.
Okay.
I think we're done here, Jimmy.
Okay, well, thanks for calling, Governor.
Get yourself to a deuce, you walking.
Okay, it was Mitt Romney.
Robby Collin.
Hey, how about Mike McRae already getting it done on today's show, huh?
If there's a better telephone comedian in all of America, I challenge you to find him.
Okay, right now I have to address an issue.
You probably noticed there's like a hiss in the background of some of the audio or most of the audio.
And again, another audio problem.
We're recording in the TV studio, a lot of bugs to work out.
I brought in a new microphone for myself.
So we're doing things.
And then we have, anyway, so that was a little bit of a problem.
It won't happen again.
The hiss, I apologize.
Maybe a lot of you won't even notice it, but I'm sure there's going to be some people who do.
So I wanted you to know that we acknowledge it and we apologize.
And we're working diligently to make everything sound better and better.
And I promise you, next week, we're going to be doing the show inside the KPFK studios so it will sound perfect again.
So I don't know how many people care about this, but there it is.
And God bless everybody for putting up with all the changes we're going through.
I really appreciate it.
And a big thanks to everybody who uses whatever way you find easiest to help support the show.
There's lots of ways to help support the show.
The easiest way is the Amazon.com box.
The next time you buy something from Amazon, if you swing by JimmyDoorComedy.com and you click on our Amazon box, when you buy something, they'll send us some money so it doesn't cost you anything.
And it doesn't change the way you shop at Amazon, but it sure does help support the show.
And thanks to everybody who already does that.
There's two other ways to help support the show.
One of them is to become a premium member.
I'll let you know about that at the end of this show.
It's $5 a month.
That's nothing.
Price of a cup of coffee.
Another way is if you're going to send flowers or strawberries.
If you're going to send somebody a nice gift, you always think people are always looking for a nice gift to send people.
I know I am.
What I used to send people all the time, even before they started advertising on the show, was Sherry's Berries.
They're huge, gigantic strawberries.
You get a great deal.
You get a half a dozen of these chocolate-covered huge strawberries for $19.95.
An extra $10, you double the order.
It's a great deal.
And how do you do it?
If you go to berries.com, B-E-R-R-I-E-S dot com, you click the microphone in the upper right-hand corner, you type in Jimmy D. That'll get you the deal, and that'll help support the show, okay?
So thanks, everybody who uses our Amazon box or uses Sherry's Berries, B-E-R-R-I-E-S dot com.
And also to our premium subscribers, which we'll talk more about.
But right now, let's get back to the second.
So I got a call this week from Rick Perry.
And here it is.
Jimmy.
Hey there, dollface.
It's me, Rick Perry, governor of Texas, ergo leader of the free world.
Old Texan humor for you.
I see your girlfriend Wendy Davis won the Democrat primary for governor.
Let me tell you, when she appeared at a political function wearing the same color suit as me, I was like, back off, bitch.
If there's someone showing up wearing a jasmine mob suit with a mint sunburst in LA and magenta shoes, that person is me.
It's going to be me.
Hey, Jimbo, are you watching what's happening with Russia and the Ukraine and stuff?
First off, I thought Ukraine was a construction rental service.
I originally didn't understand what was going on.
It just looked like white-on-white violence to me.
At least with white-on-black violence, I know who to root for.
But now people are telling me this is like World War III stuff.
So are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Nuclear annihilation, the rapture.
Jesus comes back.
It's time to get another prayer rally going.
Make that money.
Oh, yeah.
What do you think if I became Reverend Ricky in charge of my own super church?
Super fabulous church, that is.
When the apocalypse happens, we true believers float up and dance forever under the giant disco ball in heaven.
All this stuff on earth just doesn't matter.
I got all these liberal Austin farians getting on my ass about environmental regulations as if climate change is a bad thing.
Usually this time of year, my boogers drop into jagged rocks that cut into my nasal membrane.
When I spend time at Black Thughead Ranch, I'm trying to be a little more racially sensitive here.
I'm worried about what my legacy will be.
If I was president now, it would just be me and Vladimir Puntang in a room together, seeing who is the more dominant.
I'd be teaching him how to play Texas Holden.
Speaking of which, I'm going to go play Russian roulette with some prescription drugs.
Sometimes I wake up in the backyard naked.
Sometimes I wake up in a dress and high heels in the back seat of a strange car.
Guess which one I prefer?
Okay, Sugar Butt, give your little Ricky call back.
All right, that was Rick Perry.
Yeah.
So let's talk a little bit about the Ukraine.
And I just want to say a few things about the Ukraine right up top.
I am upset not only at the Eastern European Union, I am upset at the Ukraine, the Russians, the United States, everybody for making me have to find out shit about the Ukraine.
Because I don't know anything about it, and I don't want to know anything about it.
And I couldn't care less about Crimea and the Black Sea and Kiev and all.
Hey, by the way, that's where Chernobyl is.
It's inside.
All you need to know is Chicken Kiev, which is delicious.
It is.
It's like the fresh enough gum of chicken.
It's like a delicious, bursty, buttery surprise inside the chicken breast.
And then there was also tens of thousands dead at Chernobyl.
Chicken Kiev is the freshen-up of chicken disciples.
I was watching.
You're the fresh enough gum.
Oh, that's your freshman.
I thought that was a spice or something.
No, fresh enough.
I don't know like a foreign spice.
No, that's the little burst of cum that you get when you bite into Fresh Enough gum.
Yeah.
Are they the new sponsor, I assume?
Yes, the fresh enough's our new sponsor.
Are they still around?
I don't know.
Wait, that's the way you bite into it and you like squash it.
Oh, squirt your mouth.
Whatever happened to that.
I guess people wouldn't like that sensation.
I know some people like that.
You would think there'd be enough people to keep that brand going.
I'm going to bring that back to West Holly.
So I just hate everybody for making me learn about the Ukraine, which I have now learned about the Ukraine.
And I mean, I've even gone so far as to read the Wikipedia page.
So I know a lot more about the Ukraine than I ever thought I would know.
So here is Secretary of State, John Kerry.
He weighed in on the Ukraine.
And by the way, John Kerry, Secretary of State.
Bless you.
John Kerry, Secretary of State.
Exactly how the F did that happen, right?
After Susan Rice's nomination got scuttled, everyone just assumed Kerry was next on the list to be Secretary of State.
And I say, why?
The guy who couldn't rally enough Democrats to beat George W. Bush, for Christ's sake, that guy, you do know there was literally anybody else to pick from, but they picked John Kerry.
I guess it's some kind of a deal in the Democratic Party where you get to be in the cabinet if you kill a water buffalo or something.
I don't know exactly what he did, but here.
Want to know why John Kerry isn't president?
Do you want to know why he's not president?
I'm going to say it's his total lack of circumspection and irony.
And here is my evidence.
Play the clip.
Well, it's an incredible act of aggression.
It is really a stunning, willful choice by President Putin to invade another country.
You just don't, in the 21st century, behave in 19th century fashion by invading another country on completely trumped up pretext.
*laughter*
Okay, so I put a little sound effect in there.
Oh, that was you.
John Kerry went on to say the next on Kerry's list of things to say is telling, he's going to tell Australia how wrong it is to put your native Aboriginal people on reservations.
And then he's off to China where he's going to tell them the conditions for construction of their railroad are very dangerous to their Chinamen.
Do you get the irony there?
I'm doing a little.
We all get what I'm doing.
Not quite being fair because I believe John Kerry was for the Russian troops going into the Ukraine before he was.
He was against him.
Yes.
What is he talking about?
You just don't do it.
What is he saying?
Well, first off, we do do it.
We do do it when we want to do it.
But we did it in the 21st century.
We've done it plenty of times.
But also, we don't show it.
Well, if Putin did it, then he did it.
You know what I mean?
You're not saying, that's not saying anything.
You're really just not saying anything.
And then, you know, Obama followed up the same day with his thing about, well, I guess Putin was sitting around with his lawyers and didn't come up with the same decisions that we came up with with ours about invading a country.
I don't think Putin's sitting there with lawyers.
I don't think he has Crane Poole and Schmidt sitting in there going, guys, can we do this?
Is this legal?
They're doing what they want to do, and they know we won't do anything.
I'm not saying we should do anything.
I have no idea what we should do.
We're not even playing on the same field with these guys.
Yeah, I don't understand why we need to do anything.
I don't understand.
Yeah, I'm not saying we should.
I don't understand why people say, hey, he took over Crimea.
Uh-oh.
How about sleep?
I don't understand.
The Russians are now controlling Crimea, which they kind of controlled anyway because they're not.
Which is 60% Russian.
Which is 60% Russian, and they already had the fleet.
All right, their naval fleet was already stationed in the United States.
Yeah, like at least until 23rd century.
So I don't understand what people want us to do.
And let me just say this about what John Kerry said.
As always, I'd like to know, he could have said something else.
He could have said anything else.
Like, there's a million things you can say about Crimea and Ukraine without saying what he said.
But he chose those certain words in that certain sequence.
I mean, you have to be really at the top of your incompetence game to choose those words, right?
You do, but like, I mean, you know, look, this is international diplomacy, and it matters what you say, and you have to be careful.
And, of course, yeah.
There literally was a, there was a rim shot at the end of what he said, man.
I don't know if you heard that.
And he didn't even react to it.
He didn't even react.
He was like, oh, boy, they got me in the control room.
These guys are out of my bullshit.
They didn't do this shit.
Hillary never got a rim shot.
I mean, what he was saying, it's not like we're saying, you don't do this in the 21st century.
What he should have said was, we don't do this in the 20 oughts.
Right?
Because we did it in 2002.
We invaded Iraq.
But we just, we've learned a lot in the 11 years since.
I think that's what he meant to say.
And you know what's funny?
We've admitted our trumped-up pretext.
We have fully admitted it as the United States that we had a trumped-up pretext.
So him saying that you shouldn't do it is complete nonsense.
But also, we've got to remember, this is the guy that was comparing Assad to Hitler six months ago.
And we really haven't done anything there.
Apparently we let Hitler just stay in power.
Right, Hitler's killing more than he was even back then.
Maybe 5% of the chemical weapons got out.
So, you know, he just says things.
That's the problem.
He could just put these strong men up there to say things.
But I don't think it matters too much catch.
It just matters that he says something.
Like, you can't, obviously, I don't think whether we think the Crimea, the Crimean Peninsula, Crimea, the Crimea, is important.
Like, you can't obviously just send troops in and not have the rest of the world.
We have rules, right?
We break the rules when we see fit.
When it serves our purpose.
When it serves our purpose.
At the time, if you take George Bush and Dick Cheney at their word, they thought that because we'd been hit, that that was a legitimate threat.
I don't really think that.
And these guys were ultimately against that.
Not super strongly against it, just like kind of against it.
And then, so I think he's being very consistent because we were kind of against the Iraqi war, and now we're kind of against him going into the Ukraine.
so this is this is what we do but you can just like you and Like, I think he's crazy.
I think something's wrong with him.
Well, he is a dictator.
Right, he's a dictator.
And he likes to take his shirt off and look at bears.
Yeah, so he's a crazy person.
Like, something's not firing right in there.
Because he literally, like, they were, until a couple days ago, at least maybe they still are, they're denying those are Russian troops.
He's like, oh, they don't have an insignia.
I don't know who they're from.
I don't know.
They could be anybody.
Yes, I don't know.
I mean, that's insane.
You could go to a store and get that uniform.
You could buy it at that cheap trick store.
Right, that's because, I mean, to make your Hitler comparison, that's what Hitler did to start World War II.
He's like, we're going to send in a bunch of Germans and we're going to dress them up in Polish uniforms.
And we're going to pretend that they took over this radio station.
And that's going to give us a pretext to roll into a country that defends itself with horses.
It sounds like a Mel Brooks movie.
Right, right, totally.
And that was 1939.
And nobody, everybody was like, dude, those were your guts.
Like, we know it.
They were your guts.
And Hillary Clinton pointed that out the other day, and she caught hell for it, by the way.
She was comparing what Putin did to what Hitler did.
And did you see that?
No, but she said it was not a comparison.
She did it.
And then she compares them to, but I'm not comparing them.
But you just compared them.
For two paragraphs, she said that.
She said the same thing.
This is exactly what you just said.
Oh, really?
She said she wanted, look at you knowing a history, Ben.
Son of a gun.
But you didn't know that Hitler.
She said that because you have a kid.
I only know things that were taught to me when I was 19.
So I don't know what else to say about the Ukraine except that I don't want to care.
I don't know why we care so much about it.
It must be important.
Can you figure out why we care?
We care because we get to focus on Russia the way we focused on them when they were the Soviet Union.
And that's why Rudy Giuliani loves it.
The people we're about to hear from, that's why Bill Kristol loves it.
Because it's like, look, this was the kind of thing.
This is Brezhnev.
This is Khrushchev.
This is Chernyenko and Dropoff.
Nobody's going to talk about those guys.
How about Popovich?
He's got a great offensive system down in San Antonio.
He's like, that's what that, it's like a, for the right, it's like a, oh, great, an enemy we can identify with.
I'm sorry, but the Crimea is actually strategically, incredibly important.
It sits on the Black Sea.
It's the major naval port for that area.
It's very important.
And the situation with Ukraine is that Ukraine makes all of the food for that region.
That is incredibly strategically important.
And one of the things that he's doing is he's making sure that if Ukraine decides to join the European Union, that at the very least he'll still have this strategic plan.
I mean, these are not lightweight issues.
This is really important.
And the thing is, is that it is a very aggressive move that has to do with Liebenshraum.
It has to do with creating a border of security back around the former Soviet Union.
So this is not, you know, you should care.
Okay, so you shouldn't care about Crimea necessarily.
Like, that's you should care.
Like, for global politics, it matters an enormous deal.
And as soon as they threw out the previous guy, what was his name?
Yanukovych.
As soon as Yanukovych gets tossed in the Ukraine and it appears that the tilt is going to go to the West and that they're going to align with the European Union, I mean, in a sense, that was leadership.
Then at that point, it took him like 24 hours.
Like, nope, I may not be, I don't want to start a war with the Ukraine, right?
But maybe I can just secure this and I can secure our naval base and I'll secure our access to food in that area.
And the way that I can make my claim to it is by saying, legitimately, most of the people there are Russian anyway, and we gave it away rather arbitrarily in 1954.
Jimmy, don't you, in a way, kind of miss the Cold War?
Do I?
Yeah, don't you?
I do, you know what?
It's like, well, the problem is, since we haven't had the Russians as our major Cold War enemy, it seems like the United States didn't really know what to do with all its anger and hatred, and we turned it on ourselves, right?
So, the right wing and the left-wing and the libertarians and the Ron Paul crazies and the racists, and everybody's shooting at ourselves over here in America.
And I just say, can't we just all go back to the old days where we all liked each other and just hated those goddamn Russians?
Those are the old but that's why Rocky IV was such a good move, yes, and that's why John Kerry keeps bringing it up because you know who the good guy is and you know who the bad guy is, and it's very obvious.
And the bad guy's doing steroids, and steroids are very bad too.
So, now that we don't have that anymore, people don't know who they are because they don't know who to hate.
I never stopped hating the Russians, Dave.
Even after, even after he beat Drago in the speech, you didn't, the whole speech was about to be a matter of time.
The whole thing, even that, even after Boris Yelson was drinking, I didn't still in a party or I still didn't like the Russian sneaky.
I get that.
I get why Russia wanted to take over Crimea.
I get that all you have to do is look at a map and you see the strategic position of Crimea in the Black Sea.
He also centralizes his power.
He can say, I am a military power.
Okay.
It has to do.
He is coming up on really the end of his potential tenure.
And that is why you saw.
So he wants a legacy.
You think?
No, no, no, no.
He's centralizing his power to make a very, very big power move to keep himself in there as a legacy person.
But that's why you saw the gay laws coming in when they did.
And that's why you saw this move into Crimea.
Is that they have to do with him staying where he is.
And what he's doing is he's appeasing the right.
He's appeasing.
Okay.
He's appeasing the hillbillies in his own country.
Yes.
Okay.
Well, now we know why we should care about Crimea.
And by the way, I can't believe I'm saying this, but the piece that Henry Kissinger wrote today.
Yeah.
Very thoughtful.
Really?
Very thoughtful.
Like, hey, we're wondering who wrote it for him.
We're looking at this all wrong.
Like, Ukraine has always, it always has been a bridge.
It will have to continue to be a bridge.
It can't go all the way to West.
Like, it's too much for Russia to give up.
It can't.
So we're going to have to find some solution where it's this literal bridge between East and West, which is probably what it ought to be.
Okay.
Again, this is thousands of years of stuff.
This has always been the problem with Russia.
Russia has always had a rough relationship with Europe because they're half Asian and they're half European.
There are big linguistic and cultural gaps, but there are also economic and geographical issues that are hundreds and hundreds of years old.
So we're learning about the Ukraine, and I can't, I got to be honest, I still resent it.
I resent having to learn all this stuff, but it is interesting.
Okay.
And we'll be back with some jokes.
Everybody, so we got a phone call this week from Luke Russert.
Luke Russer was.
So here's what the world's most successful intern had to say.
If you want to be on the phone today, it's MSNBC congressional correspondent Luke Russert.
Jimmy, what's up, bro?
Did you have a rock and ass Wednesday?
Luke, I don't really participate in Catholic stuff these days.
And it's not just the whole child molesting thing.
My disenchantment started way before that, buddy.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, who hold up, dude.
I thought we were talking about the Catholic Church.
Why are you bringing up Woody Allen?
My sources tell me he's Jewish.
I'm talking about the Catholic priest molestation scandal.
Hmm.
I'm not familiar with that.
I guess I don't surf the obscure left-wing websites that you read.
It was a big story.
It was in all the papers.
Jimmy, I'm a Washington journalist, so if it isn't in Mike Allen's early morning email, it's not worth knowing.
Speaking of Woody Allen, how are you getting along with your new MSNBC colleague, Ronan Farrell?
He seems like a nice up guy, but Jimmy, I hate to say this, but I think it's kind of wrong when people get hired for a gig just because of who their father is.
Actually, Ronan Farrell may be young, but for a kid his age, he's got quite a bit of experience in the worlds of diplomacy and international politics.
Yeah, but how is any of that supposed to be helpful in this line of work?
Not to blow my own horn, but while Ronan Faro has been gallivanting all over the globe, being an envoy for the International House of Pancakes, or whatever the heck you just said he was up to, I was here on Capitol Hill in the trenches doing real journalist stuff.
Such as kissing up to John Boehner.
He and I have a great relationship, you know.
I know, I've heard you say it on the air.
Yeah, and I'll have you know that whenever the speaker puts out a press release stating a GOP talking point that will have no effect on the lives of everyday Americans, I'm one of the first people he sends it to.
Wow, that is impressive, Luke.
But listen, back to the subject of Ronan Faro.
There's some question about who his real father is.
Do you think it's Woody Allen or Frank Sinatra?
Who?
Frank Sinatra.
Never heard of him.
You never heard of Frank Sinatra.
He's one of the great musical icons of the 20th century, Luke.
20th century?
I'm not into that old people crap.
When I listen to music, it's modern, cutting-edge stuff like Josh Groven.
You really have your finger on the pulse of the youth today, don't you?
Got that right.
Say, Jimmy, you know what I'm giving up for Lent?
What?
Follow-up questions.
That's not exactly a sacrifice on your part.
You've never asked one follow-up question since you started your job.
Jimmy, I'd inquire as to why you feel that way, but that would feel like a follow-up question, so forget it.
And here's another thing I'm giving up for Lent: false equivalencies.
Luke, I have to say, I'd be quite impressed if you did that.
Look, Jimmy Deepdown, we're all the same.
We're all God's children.
Deserters who are trying to destroy the Affordable Care Act and are willing to let the poor children starve and hate Obama because he's black are every bit as spiritual as progressives who believe in equality and social justice.
And that's why I'm giving up false equivalency for Lent.
With all due respect, Luke, what you just said is insane.
Jimmy Both says, do it.
Both of us do it.
Oh, crap.
Look what you did.
You maybe fought the Lentwagon.
Luke Russert, thanks for joining us, buddy.
Rotten hell, Heathen.
You know that both sides do.
Both sides do it.
Yes, A.J. Luke.
He's the one they do.
He's the Louisian Juliet.
Both sides do do it.
Both sides do do it.
All right.
That's Luke Russard, ladies and gentlemen.
Thanks to Luke for calling in.
Hey, we're talking about the C-SPAC, C-PAN.
I don't know why I can't say it.
Because you keep saying C-SPAN in your head.
Yes, it's the CPAC, right?
CPAC.
So CPAC, they were giving their speeches today, were tabled at March 5th.
Today's March 5th or 6th.
Today's the I don't know what day it is, but today they gave speeches.
Ted Cruz, right?
So the ideas they were saying that the Republicans have better ideas than the Democrats.
And here's some of the better ideas.
Here's Ted Cruz with a better idea.
We need to repeal every single word of Obamacare.
Yes.
Yes.
Fresh ideas.
That's what I like about it.
Can we play that again?
And just the way he approaches it.
Yeah, my goodness.
Play it again, Gilbert.
I love it.
I love everything about Ted Cruz.
It's beautiful.
We need to repeal every single word of Obamacare.
That was his whole speech.
Ladies and gentlemen, Texas Senator Chapter.
Everybody.
And we need to reveal every single word of Obamacare.
That is the political equivalent of having a gig as a stand-up and a frat and just walk on stage going, who likes pussy?
Who's drinking?
I'm going to fuck the shit out of this teleprompter right now.
And you're like the smug.
And that's not an idea.
And also, we didn't edit it.
That was his whole speech.
That's his whole speech.
We need to reveal every single word of Obamacare.
Yay!
Good night.
Drops the mic.
Six-hour standing ovation.
He drops the mic.
I'm out of here.
So Chris Christie gave a speech.
And I'm going to play a little clip of it right here.
And you tell me if you can pick up the hypocritical irony.
You remember when they set up this whole super committee thing, right?
Way back when they were trying to resolve the budget problems and all the rest.
They set up a super committee.
And after the super committee got nothing done, what did the White House say?
The White House said the president never met with the super committee or got involved with them because he knew they were doomed to failure.
Man, that's leadership, isn't it?
You're the leader of the government.
You see something getting ready to go off the rails.
And what you decide to do is stay as far away from it as possible.
Well, my question then is the same.
My question now is the same question I had then.
If that's your attitude, Mr. President, what the hell are we paying you for?
Where are you going to go with this, Jimmy?
I think I know.
I guess I should have put a rim shot on that one, too, with a little huh.
And that's pretty amazing, right?
He's like, oh, you're the biggest scandal of your administration.
You're going to try and run away from it.
Chris Christie, for the last two months, has been walking around going, I don't know nothing.
I don't know nothing.
These guys, I don't know nothing about what they did.
I don't know nothing about nothing.
I don't know.
I delegate huge responsibility.
I don't know nothing.
I mean, this is just how bad politics has become.
Even the point that he's making that super committees never do anything.
And then even if what he said was true, I don't know if it's true.
But even it is true that Obama refused to even meet them.
Well, you do the same thing.
So we can't.
There's just nothing insane about any of this.
They're all liars.
So, I mean, I'm not saying that the Democrats are good or better.
I mean, they are better because they're not as crazy.
They're not as in the alternative reality bubble.
It just doesn't seem to be popping, right?
And it seems when Barack Obama got elected, it just got bigger and bigger and bigger.
I understood why the Republicans were full of it when George Bush was president and Dick Cheney because they had to stay in line.
So they had to push the lie, whatever the lie was that day.
And so they did it.
But I don't understand.
They just can't stop.
Like, it's, are they all just, did they all just revel in self-delusion?
It's cognitive dissonance Olympic sport to the right wing.
It's unbelievable.
I mean, that there, it's funny on its face.
You don't even, I don't, you don't need me to make that funny.
It's already funny.
Yeah, first of all, you had me at hippo.
God, Chris Christie, hippo crit.
Hippo Chris.
Also, you know, from a landing with the audience point of view, the super committee, from like when you have to tell them the thing that you're making your big point about, they're like, I didn't even know.
I don't even know what you're talking about.
I don't remember which super committee.
Obama didn't meet with them.
People are like, yeah, that's leadership.
All right.
Yeah.
Okay, you got him.
Yeah, yeah.
Yes, the guy who just got done saying, I don't know what goes on in Mike State.
Things that the people as my deputy secretary ordered it.
I fired.
I didn't ask her what happened.
Anyway, this guy, though, it's worse than me.
This guy's worse than me.
It's a guy.
I've been friends with this guy for 20 years.
Then I gave him a job.
I don't even know what he's doing.
Mine was about Elaine.
His was about a super committee.
Super.
Super.
That's pretty good.
The word super is in it.
I gave a guy a job to run the port authority who had some nefarious reports when he was in social studies in high school.
Hey, guess what's coming up in the premium content this week?
We got a phone call with Representative Peter King from New York.
Okay, hello.
Is this Congressman Peter King?
Yes, Peter King.
What's this?
This is Jimmy Dore.
Oh, God.
You're one of those liberals going to watch me to make wedding cake for the quiz.
So that is what is coming up in the premium content this week.
And how do you get the premium content?
It costs $5 a month.
Isn't that nice?
You make a $5 donation a month and you get all the premium content.
And how do you do that?
You go to JimmyDoorComedy.com.
You click on premium.
You make your donation.
You get a passcode.
Hey, if you don't have the passcode, if you've made your donation, you didn't get it, send me an email at jimmydoor at earthlink.net, my old-timey email, and I'll get it to you right away, okay?
Hey, the app is here.
We finalized the stuff today.
Okay, I know I feel like a tease, but it's here.
Hey, if you'd like to be an audience member when we do the Jimmy Door show live, you can send me an email at the old timey email, Jimmy Door at Earthlink, and put audience in the subject line.
And we'll let you know when that happens.
Right now, we're planning on recording the shows, doing the live shows Thursday nights or Saturdays.
So send us an email.
We'll put you on the list.
We'll send you the info on how to become a member, an audience member, for a live taping of the Jimmy Door show.
If that interests you, let us know.
Also, we always have the hotline, the Jimmy Dore Show hotline, which is 323-375-4170.
And if you missed that number, rewind and you'll hear it again.
So that's the hotline number.
Okay, and you can leave us your name and email.
We'll send you an email back with all the info on how to come be a member in the audience to see the Jimmy Dore show tape live.
Okay, so it's coming.
Today's show was written.
That's right.
It was written by Mike McRae, Steph Zamorano, Robert Yasamura, Mark Van Landewitt, and Frank Conniff.
All the voices performed by the one and the only the inimitable, Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
And a big shout out to Sean James, who if you have a problem with your Macintosh computer, he'll fix it for you right over the internet.
You don't even have to leave your house.
Isn't that nice?
And how do you get a hold of him?
You send him an email at machelp at seanjames.com.
That's machelp at seanjames.com.
And he'll take care of your computer for you.
Fix it for you.
He's did it for me again this week.
I had the passcode problems.
Hey, listen, his phone number is 347-695-0601 if you want to give him a call.
That's Sean James.
Okay, that's it for this week.
▲
Export Selection