| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Hard Choices, Precious Babies
00:15:31
|
|
| I'm overwhelmed. | |
| I'm overwhelmed. | |
| I'm overwhelmed with these ladies. | |
| I'm overwhelmed with these babies. | |
| I'm overwhelmed. | |
| It's just the most beautiful, precious thing ever. | |
| It's the greatest outreach we could ever do with our ministry. | |
| You know, maybe I shouldn't say this, but I do have a little thing where it's like, you know, you have a church, you have a, I come from an outreach church, over 200 outreaches at the church I was spiritually raised in. | |
| But I always said, you know, I kind of don't trust a church that doesn't do outreach. | |
| You know, you know, as foreign no more. | |
| Got to do something. | |
| This is the greatest outreach our ministry has. | |
| It's called Lori's House. | |
| It's not about me. | |
| It's about these precious babies, these precious children, and these precious moms. | |
| My name is Carrie Durbin. | |
| My name is Rose Verfirth. | |
| Veronica Cervantes. | |
| So my name is Leah Beard. | |
| My name is Tiffany Pearson. | |
| They didn't know where to go, what to do. | |
| Their stories are mind-boggling. | |
| They blow me away. | |
| They keep thanking me. | |
| But it's Jesus. | |
| It's Jesus. | |
| And it is him. | |
| And God does get all the glory. | |
| He gets all the glory. | |
| And he took exactly what it says in the word of God. | |
| Everything that Satan meant for evil, God will turn it for good. | |
| I was in jail, and I was facing 15 years in prison. | |
| So kind of took the chance, you know, to try to get out and have a healthy pregnancy. | |
| The judge let me out. | |
| I had a choice. | |
| I had a choice and I was scared. | |
| At the time, there was only one place to do it and that was in St. Louis, the abortion. | |
| And I knew I wasn't going to be able to make it there. | |
| And I was wondering whether or not I should even do it. | |
| I needed to get help because I was on drugs and I was pregnant. | |
| I'm not scared. | |
| And I didn't think I could have a baby. | |
| When I got here, I was five months pregnant and I had about a week off of drugs. | |
| And I remember sitting outside and looking up at the sky and I said, God, I can't do this. | |
| I can't have it. | |
| I can't have this baby. | |
| I can't. | |
| And God, I don't think I can raise this baby on my own. | |
| I think I'm going to have to give the baby up for adoption. | |
| I was homeless, pregnant, almost about to have Marley, my daughter, and I didn't know what I was going to do. | |
| I've been rejected from some maternity homes in Springfield. | |
| Family wasn't around. | |
| And I had a caseworker. | |
| She helped me find Lori's house and they took me in right away. | |
| I did have a son back in 2014. | |
| He ended up passing away. | |
| He was four months old. | |
| I lived in a few maternity homes here down in Lake of the Ozark area and St. Louis. | |
| I couldn't ask for a better place to have been to have my daughter because really if it wasn't for Lori's house, I probably would still be homeless with no daughter. | |
| The state probably would have had my daughter, probably still be in drugs with my baby daddy, just not caring about the world. | |
| He's my first kid, so I didn't really, you know, I wasn't very structured or prepared to be a first-time mother. | |
| I had made some really bad decisions and I really didn't know that I was pregnant at the time. | |
| So to find out that I was like 22 weeks and three days pregnant was like a shock to me. | |
| And as soon as she told me, yeah, you're pregnant, like I looked at her and I said, it's way too late for an abortion. | |
| I was not in a good place in my life pregnant and in an abusive relationship. | |
| Packing up and just walking away from it all to escape that abusive relationship was not an easy feat for me. | |
| It's hard to walk away from things. | |
| So many people know my story of my past, born and raised in church. | |
| I became so hard-hearted. | |
| I looked hard. | |
| All of a sudden, one day, it was Easter Sunday, that I was at the club the night before. | |
| I'm not at the nightclub, 1989. | |
| I'm out having a good time, checking the guys out, you know, the whole thing. | |
| But I was so hard-hearted because I had been through so much with men, from my dad to my ex-husband to all these other men in between. | |
| And I'm like, you know, men going to use women. | |
| We're just going to use them. | |
| I mean, I was hard-hearted, and I looked hard. | |
| I'm celebrating almost going on four years of sobriety. | |
| So coming to Lori's house really helped me set a strong foundation that I wouldn't have found anywhere else. | |
| What I have taken from Lori's house is what God gave me. | |
| And that was his love. | |
| That no matter how angry I was at him and blamed him for all the bad that happened, no matter how much I blamed God for that, he still loved me enough to bring me here. | |
| One of those favorite things that I love about Lori's house is just everything. | |
| Being able to just be me and not have to worry about what everyone else thinks and wants from me. | |
| I can just kind of enjoy myself and I get to meet a lot of new people and hear stories. | |
| I like to hear the history and how people have lived and people who have been here before me. | |
| Lori's house is very for the mothers. | |
| Let me put it this way. | |
| For the mothers, Lori's house is very all about the moms. | |
| It's all about the moms and the babies. | |
| So I can't really say that it was hard. | |
| There's nothing really that was hard about it, but just adapting to the fact that there are actually people out there that want it to be about you and your expecting mother or you and the child, that was one of the things that it was hard for me to grasp because I didn't realize that there are actually people out there that actually cared. | |
| This beautiful home, it's like a mansion here and way more than I deserved, but it's so peaceful. | |
| You have this beautiful creek here. | |
| You can go for walks. | |
| You have the support of the church and of God. | |
| It's just, this place is anointed. | |
| And we just, I was able to spend that first three months bonding with my daughter and not having to worry about anybody coming here because it's safe looking for us. | |
| There was the peace. | |
| It's just the peace. | |
| And I never actually had that with my other two children, my oldest, to be able to just have that time with them, to mother and daughter bond, mother and child bond, and just focus on God and our lives and prayer. | |
| And so, you know, with my other two, I had to go back to work right away. | |
| And this place offered that such important, it's so important, that bonding time. | |
| And my daughter is a special girl. | |
| And so she knows that she knows about God. | |
| The favorite thing is the support. | |
| I really didn't have that growing up. | |
| It was a struggle. | |
| I did have both my parents, but they were in their addiction until I was 12. | |
| I didn't have any family in the state. | |
| So to have the support that the family offered me and Mama Lori and just the whole community, not just one specific person, it was, it takes a village. | |
| And being a single mom of two toddlers going through what I was trying to fix from my past and to remake myself, they really helped me do that. | |
| I never in a million years thought that I would have a home that we would build for women who were unwed, pregnant, found themselves pregnant, and have them come and live in this beautiful home to save these babies and these women, both, both of them. | |
| But to save the babies, because of my five abortions, because of me not being able to have kids after them, after making so many wrong Choices. | |
| It was my heart's desire to be able to help others some way, shape, or form. | |
| Whether you want the baby or whether you don't want the baby right now, place their, I mean, I can't just say just Lori's house. | |
| I'm not. | |
| I'm not familiar with the other names of some of the places like Lori's house, but I know that being a mother, that I spent the full amount of time that we were invited to stay here. | |
| I spent the full time here, and I never once one day woke up and thought, oh, this is something I wouldn't want to do because there's so much love and there's just so much care that they have here. | |
| Especially, I mean, it is very, it will definitely open your eyes to what the Lord has for you. | |
| So, if there's anything else, I mean, it does matter, and you as a mother matter, and so does your baby. | |
| It's hard. | |
| It's going to be really hard. | |
| It was hard for me throughout my entire life. | |
| And it's still hard for some of the things that I've done and have done. | |
| And I still continue to do that I need to fix. | |
| But you are important. | |
| You're important to yourself, your family, and your children, child. | |
| And your children are important to you and your family. | |
| And there shouldn't be anything else that's as important as your child and you in the world. | |
| And that's how I took it. | |
| Was no one's going to be there for me. | |
| No one was going to be there for my daughter but me. | |
| So I had to take steps and take precautions and choices that were going to be really hard and that I didn't want to do, but I had to. | |
| And they were for the best. | |
| And just pray and have hope and faith and give Lori's house a chance. | |
| Just don't think that they're trying to keep you from the world, from the family. | |
| They want to help you and your child have a better life. | |
| You know, it's hard to have something taken and given to you in a different way. | |
| But sometimes different ways are better than the ways that you've been living. | |
| And that's how I am today: if I wasn't here at Lori's house and if they didn't help me and change my life, I probably wouldn't even be here today. | |
| And it's scary. | |
| It's scary to think about. | |
| But we're strong women of God. | |
| And He wouldn't have been able, He wouldn't have given us this blessing to carry children if He didn't know that we can do it. | |
| We can do it together as moms, sisters, grandmas. | |
| I mean, anyone, really adoptive moms, adoptive sisters, aunts and uncles. | |
| And children are the future, and we love them, and we are the only thing that they have and see and need. | |
| So just keep strong, and everything will be all right as long as we just take care of each other as moms and our babies. | |
| Because we love babies. | |
| And so I was contemplating whether or not I should give the baby up because I knew I shouldn't kill the baby, but I didn't think I could raise the baby on my own. | |
| So I was going to give the baby up for adoption. | |
| But when I said out to God, God, I can't do this. | |
| I can't do this on my own. | |
| I can't raise this baby. | |
| God said, and he didn't say in a voice, but he gave me this peace. | |
| He said, but you're not going to raise this baby alone. | |
| I am your father and I am your provider. | |
| And that's why I kept Adam, was because God gave me that peace. | |
| And it's been three years. | |
| And there's been times where I was crying my eyes out. | |
| God, you said you were going to provide. | |
|
A Safe Place to Grow
00:09:06
|
|
| You said you were going to provide. | |
| And following my eyes out on the front porch of my apartment in Hollister. | |
| And every single time God pulls through. | |
| And he provides every single time. | |
| Every single time. | |
| When I got pregnant with my daughter, because I was, I had that separation of my other two children, my pregnancy was definitely, despite the fact that I was in a terrible place in my life and I thought, God, this is not a good idea. | |
| This is a terrible idea. | |
| But he knows better than anybody. | |
| He had a plan and she was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. | |
| But abortion for me was never an option. | |
| And I just would like to express that because Lori's house is a place not just for girls who are considering abortion, but also for girls like myself who are escaping a terrible place in their life. | |
| So, you know, abusive relationships, drugs, and they just need someplace safe. | |
| So if you're looking for someplace safe, if you're looking for a true change in your life, this is a wonderful place to come. | |
| It's not always easy. | |
| It's very quiet here. | |
| So a lot of your past might come back to talk to you, you know, but there's so much anointing here. | |
| This place is prayed over. | |
| And God's protection is definitely here. | |
| So come here if you're looking for something in your life and you're looking for a safe place for you and your new baby. | |
| Join us and be part of the Lori's House alumni. | |
| Change your lives. | |
| In the beginning of my pregnancy, I tried to commit suicide. | |
| I didn't want to bring another baby into this world and lose him or her. | |
| So God has blessed me with an opportunity to be the mom that I never thought I could be. | |
| And I just want you to know that there are people out there that really want to see you succeed and that will help you and walk with you and fight those battles with you, that you're not alone and that you have a place to go. | |
| I know for a fact there are so many women who find themselves pregnant and unwanted pregnancy. | |
| It wasn't, they didn't plan it. | |
| They didn't have anywhere to go. | |
| They didn't know what to do. | |
| They're on the streets. | |
| They're doing drugs. | |
| They're old men, as we would say in the 70s, which would mean like a boyfriend or a guy, just somebody that, just somebody you had sex with. | |
| Literally. | |
| And you find yourself pregnant. | |
| And the easy thing to do is go and have an abortion, you think. | |
| Just get rid of. | |
| The problem is what Satan says to you, because how are you going to support a child, how are you going to take care of a child? | |
| I'm a single mom, or maybe you might be married and the dad, like I was, and and he's like you know, it's either me or we're going down to the clinic, And I know there's, I know you're there. | |
| I know who you are in my spirit. | |
| I know that you need a place. | |
| And this is a place to come. | |
| It's a safe place. | |
| It's a place of refuge. | |
| It's a place of restitution for sure and restoration. | |
| It's a place to come that is peaceful. | |
| Well, we have a lot of little kids running around right now, but it's peaceful. | |
| The love of God is here. | |
| You grow. | |
| I'm so amazed at these ladies. | |
| I'm so proud of them because I remember each one of them when they came to Lori's house for the first time. | |
| And they weren't the same women that they are today. | |
| They have grown up so much in the things of the Lord. | |
| And being a good mother, taking care of their child, making sure this Lori's house is a place to make sure we don't kill our children. | |
| Jesus said to the disciples, when the disciples were trying to push, take the children, keep the children away from Jesus, Jesus said, no, let the little children come unto me. | |
| That's how important this is. | |
| It's the most important thing. | |
| And this is the most amazing place of love, of restoration, safety. | |
| We have an amazing team that takes care and leads Pastor Job back. | |
| This team takes care of you, the mom, the woman that finds herself on the streets, finds herself homeless, finds herself in a bad situation, needs to get out of it actually, because God has a greater plan for your life. | |
| So I would say, if you ever need a place to come, this is the place to come. | |
| And now, more than ever, ever since Roe was overturned, I'm talking about Roe versus Wade. | |
| You know, the Supreme Court, this all just happened. | |
| Never in my lifetime. | |
| 1973, the Supreme Court makes the decision, abortion legal in the United States of America. | |
| So every woman was having abortions in the mid-70s. | |
| I mean, everyone in my circle, this is just what you did. | |
| And all of a sudden, Roe is overturned just recently, meaning that now there's a lot of mothers that find themselves pregnant and they are maybe in a state where abortion is not legal anymore. | |
| You can't. | |
| But here is a place to come right here. | |
| And we want you to come. | |
| We want to help you. | |
| We love you. | |
| But most importantly, the Lord loves you. | |
| Yeshua, Jesus loves you. | |
| He has a plan and a purpose for your life and for your baby's life that will grow up. | |
| This is the next generation. | |
| We need to train them up in the ways of the Lord. | |
| Now is the time. | |
|
Dining in the Sky
00:00:32
|
|
| I wonder what you are. | |
| Up by the rolls so high, like the dining in the sky. | |
| Jingle, jinkle, little star. | |
| I wonder what you are. | |