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Dec. 11, 2020 - Hodgetwins
11:19
The Worst Santa EVER!!
# white privilege spongebob sellout anti asian hate chinese virus christmas sales gun control holiday traditions liberal santa monkey brains nerf gun political satire racism

Hodgetwins host promotes a racist Christmas sale where white customers get 25% off while Black patrons face escalating discounts until receiving nothing under the "sellout" code. He condemns a Santa figure for refusing a child's Nerf gun request, labeling him a "Liberal Santa," before expressing homophobia and xenophobia by wishing the real Santa contracts the "Chinese virus" in China. The segment concludes with the host arguing against gun control while promoting merchandise using the slur as a discount code, illustrating extreme bigotry disguised as holiday humor. [Automatically generated summary]

Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Time Text
White Privilege Discount Code 00:02:24
Yeah, I got a new show for y'all.
Yeah, we got a damn good show.
Damn good show.
Good show.
But you know it's Christmas time and it's still time to get those Christmas gifts.
Yeah, we throw in a sale and if you order them by Sunday, yeah, we can guarantee Santa Claus is gonna ham at your house before Christmas.
Ho ho ho ho.
Use discount code white privilege if you're white.
Yeah.
If you black, you better not use that damn discount code.
Yeah.
There's rules in this country you need to follow.
Yeah, this is for white people.
Where would this country be without white people?
Let's just be honest.
I'm just joking.
We believe in equality.
You ain't joking.
We believe in equality.
White people did a lot of good in this country.
That's why I'm giving you 25% off.
Yeah, but hey, we're giving you a discount too.
Let's give the black people 20% off.
Stop playing.
Y'all get 25% off.
Y'all give them 20%, man.
They're black.
Kevin, come on.
Dude, we're too good to these black folks.
Give them 15% off.
Kevin, stop.
Keep talking.
I give them five.
Look, 3%.
Now you get 3%.
Look.
Two?
What?
You ain't getting nothing.
Look, we believe in equality over here.
We got y'all 25% off.
Your discount code is sellout.
Because you're watching us, you're a damn race traitor.
Yeah, that's what y'all.
It's a damn shame.
They took our black card.
And when they find out about you, you'll lose yours too.
But you know what?
Since I gave up my black card, Weddie took it.
Yeah, Weddie took it.
That's a good thing, you know.
Suddenly, my life improved.
Yeah, my credit score went up 100 points.
I was free now.
Make good decisions.
Break hard.
Hold yourself accountable.
Stop blame other people for your problems.
There you go.
You go a long way in this world, man.
All right, let's get serious on this.
Let's get serious on this.
Yeah.
Santa Claus.
Yeah.
The cornerstone of Christmas.
Yeah.
Even though he's not really the cornerstone, Christmas is about other things, but he's a big part of it, man.
When I was a little boy, when I thought of Christmas, first thing that popped in my head was this big fat white man bringing me a gift.
Sellout And The Black Card 00:07:53
Right?
And this kid was just destroyed by this.
Shooting the video, man.
Man, look at the video.
No.
No, I don't, no guns.
Nerf guns.
Nope, not even a nerf gun.
Nope.
If your dad wants to get it for you, that's fine, but I can't bring it to you.
But what else would you like?
Lots of other choice.
There's Legos, bicycles, there's pirates and trucks.
What do you think?
What do you think?
It's okay, Dad.
I'm telling you, man.
If that was my little boy, you mean my little boy cry?
It's time for Santa to cry.
I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
And I'm a Christian.
Oh, you're gonna cry.
You're gonna cry three times as loud.
Nah, nobody does that to my little boy.
You'd be lucky Kev Hodge wouldn't stand in line with his little boy.
Oh man, that would have been real bad for you.
And you know, he's not the only kid to ask for some kind of toy gun.
He's probably doing that all day because little boys, what they want, a water gun.
Yeah.
I mean, Santa acts like he went up there and asked him for a Glock.
Let me get a 40 cal.
He asked for a damn Nerf gun.
Said your daddy can get it.
No shit, Santa.
Your job is to just go along with the lie.
He's going to bring it anyway.
But you really think your fat ass is going to go to his house and give him a Nerf gun?
Yeah, that's not the, that's not your job description.
You're not actually going to deliver these toys.
Did you understand the job application?
You didn't have to actually take the toys to the kids' houses.
Did you know that?
You just had to say, ask him a question.
What do you want for Christmas?
Say, yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Ho, ho, ho.
That's all you had to do.
This kid is already more man than you are, Santa.
He already wants a gun.
He wants to protect his family, his loved ones.
He's no sissy like you.
Hey, look, and then Santa starts throwing out, well, you can get a bicycle, some Legos.
I'm like, look here, Santa.
He didn't ask you what you play with.
He wanted his damn Nerf gun.
And you couldn't fulfill it.
Liberal Santa, man.
Well, look at it like this.
When I was a kid, you know what?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Go ahead.
Like when I was a kid, seeing Santa, that was.
That was, I had a lot of anxiety, man.
I was actually scared.
I was scared because Santa, just look at him.
He looks crazy as hell.
I'm like, I've never been in that line.
I have my mama.
And I keep hearing this man, ho, ho, ho, ho.
Yeah.
You won't little boy for about two hours, man.
Yeah.
And when I got up to the lineup, man, I started freaking out.
And I mean, as a little boy, I was like, just look at it from a little boy's standpoint.
This is a yeah, it's a fat dude, right?
He got on this crazy red, red suede velvet suit with white plush all over it with them beady eyes.
Yeah, that white, that white beard, and he's fat, right?
And supposedly, he lives in the North Pole with a bunch of elves who's creating toys all day, all day throughout the year.
And on Christmas night, he gets his big fat ass in a sleigh with this bag of toys meant for the entire world wearing about 30 megatons.
And his damn deer is flying him through the sky.
He lands on your roof.
He squeezes his big ass into Kimley.
I mean, it's just crazy.
Yeah.
Just think of it from that little kid, man.
This is a really majestic experience.
A what experience?
Majestic.
What the hell does that mean?
It's like fairy tale, man.
Okay.
Yeah.
I learned a new word.
I hope that's the definition.
Majestic.
I like you be like making up words during the show.
What you say the other day?
What'd he say?
The words ambiguous.
What'd he say?
Ambiguous.
Well, that's what the word looks like to me.
Ambiguous.
But anyway.
But yeah, this is a real special occasion, man.
He's like, you know, on Cloud Nine, he's very anxious, very, a lot of anxiety.
I know I was.
Yeah.
And then for you to just say, no, your dad can bring it.
And this kid is not liberal.
He's not conservative.
He's just a little boy.
Yeah.
And you're supposed to be Santa Claus.
Not liberal Santa Claus.
And I just.
I think it's a possibility that Santa might have been gay.
What makes you say that?
Well, he sounds like SpongeBob.
Everybody knows he's gay.
Yeah, he's got to be.
Not that it's anything wrong with being a gay Santa.
Okay, let's get off the subject.
Hey, if you are gay, you set gay people back by 400 years, man.
Hey, look here.
All right, this is the thing.
I mean, when I saw this.
Yeah.
I mean, this is supposed to be a great time of year, you know.
Yeah.
But this put evil in my heart.
Yeah.
I was like, man, I wish you was the real Santa.
Yeah.
You know, I hope your ass fly to China.
Yeah.
Rudolph goes to sleep at the wood and just drags the whole damn sleigh down.
You fall and some Chinese man come up to you and right in your fat ass face.
Hope you get Chinese virus.
Hope you get quarantined in China.
I hope they put you on a strict diet because you fat as hell.
I hope they put you on bats.
No, wait a minute.
I hope they give you cats, dogs, and some bat soup.
And for dessert, I hope they give your fat ass some monkey brains.
Man, because that was that was so stupid.
It ain't about being liberal, conservative.
This is Christmas.
It's a holiday.
You don't bring those type of beliefs and put them on a little boy at that age.
He don't know what's going on.
He thinks you're Santa.
Yeah, you just crushed him.
He asked for a nerf gun.
Nerf.
No, your daddy can bring it, but I ain't bringing that.
You ain't bringing it.
Yeah.
It's supposed to be, man.
Man, you beating that dead horse.
Where did this happen?
This got to be in some suburb of Chicago.
He's probably going to get an award from Mayor Lightfoot.
Yeah, liberal shithole.
Yeah.
I'm telling you, man, I'm telling you, man, some of these, these liberals, man, they got half a brain.
No, they got a brain.
This is the problem with liberals.
They don't think with their brain.
They think with their heart.
They see guns and like, they look at it.
It's like, a gun doesn't have a heartbeat, doesn't have legs or arms.
It just doesn't go around shooting people.
Yeah, it doesn't have a hate in its heart.
Yeah.
Even though this Santa's got hate in his heart.
It's evil people that use that for things that wasn't meant to be used for.
It's just used for protection.
Like car accidents, drunk drivers.
Liberals And Gun Protection 00:01:00
Yeah.
I don't talk about banning cars or banning alcohol.
You know why?
Because everybody loves that car and they love alcohol.
Yeah.
Those kill far more people than guns.
You know, it's just they got bad logic.
Yeah, it's just stupid, man.
I mean, if that was me, man, Santa, man, that would, man.
Time to cry, Santa.
Damn, nerf gun.
Set up and boo hoo and all the way back to the North Pole, South Pole, or wherever the hell you from.
Anyway, Merry Christmas, everybody.
Ho, ho, ho!
That was a damn good show.
Yeah.
Go to officialharshtwins.com and pick you out a patriotic t-shirt today.
Hell, I'm even giving you a 20% off.
Just type in this time code, Chinese virus.
We call it Chinese because it's from China.
We making t-shirts great again.
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