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March 11, 2023 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:35:07

S4E226 - SPECIAL NEEDS

The mainstream left is finally realizing that Jan 6 was a hoax and antifa are the establishment but we've known all this for so long, we're like Ancien' Chinee Secreh.

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Time	Text
	I wrote the bill.
	Live from New York, here's the New York Times.
	It's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McKinnon.
	Sweat, baby, sweat, baby.
	Sex is a Texas drought.
	Me and you do that kind of stuff that only French would sing about.
	So put your hands down my pants, and I'll bet you'll feel nuts.
	Yes, I'm Joey.
	Yes, I'm Biden.
	And you're getting two thumbs up.
	You've had enough of two-hand cuffs.
	You want to rub your mouth about.
	I want you smothered.
	I want you covered.
	Like my Waffle House and Scrum Coming quicker than FedEx Never reach a apex Just like a cool stock You are the client Make me rise in power Early just like day Let's save his time Do it now You and me, baby They're nothing but mammals So let's do it like they do On this discovery channel Do it again You and me, baby That's the most coherent I've ever heard Joe Biden Me too
	I mean, he's so retarded, you press the stop button and he kept going, but... What an idiot.
	Besides that.
	What a stupid idiot retard.
	Yes.
	It's not a nice word.
	No.
	But, guys, when you take away words like the n-word, which was, it just had a great trigger sound to it, you can't replace it with people of color.
	Midgets are little people.
	What do you got for retard?
	Special needs?
	Mentally challenged.
	Special needs actually is pretty funny to say Biden is special needs.
	Sped.
	But then people started saying sped and now that's bad.
	Sped doesn't come from special needs.
	Special ed?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Today is a fun show.
	It's a free show.
	It's got sponsors.
	It's pretty much like the other shows.
	This is Get Off My Lawn.
	Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays are normal days.
	Friday's the free day with ads, but Monday and Tuesday are very normal.
	Wednesday, we're in the city with Anthony Cumia on Compound Censored.
	We're in the city now.
	We're in the Bronx, but this is the island of Manhattan.
	On Wednesdays and then Thursdays it's Cops and Robber where we have a panel of police and one criminal and we go through various cop videos and I insult female cops, they defend them.
	I insult criminals, criminals give their side of the story and they all seem to get along.
	That was last night's show.
	Last night's show, we had Vinnie Parko, who just got out of jail for framing a guy, sort of, who was using prostitutes, and the guy was attacking his client for sleeping with a 17-year-old.
	So he said, really?
	What about the time you got fucked with a strap-on?
	Here, I have it on tape.
	So that was considered soliciting prostitution.
	Vinnie's convinced it's because they were all Hasidic Jews, and they hold a lot of sway with the Brooklyn DA.
	They hold a lot of oive with the Brooklyn DA.
	Native Fashions is one of our sponsors.
	They made this wonderful suit.
	One of the best things about it, these suits, is it says your name in them.
	You kind of have to fantasize that when you die, your sons are going to be, you know, not happy, but they'll be honored to wear your old clothes.
	My son's already six feet.
	If he wears this, it looks like floods.
	That's a dumb thing.
	Don't live for your legacy.
	I mean, obviously you want to have kids and be Immortal in that sense, but don't live for how you'll be perceived in history live for the moment I started vice if you look at any sort of background advice.
	I'm completely written out of it I was the sort of progenitor of not just vice and hipsters, but that whole early odd scene in New York City Totally excluded Stalin airbrushed out of the photographs like Stalin would I don't give a shit Because I was there at the time and it was fucking fun.
	I So don't buy suits from Nita Fashions because your kids will want them one day.
	Wear them, buy them, because you want them today.
	And one of the funnest parts of Nita Fashions, you can contact them, direct message them from their Instagram, or you can find them on their website.
	What are those URLs, Ryan?
	NitaFashions.com, and they are Nita Fashions on Instagram, I'm pretty sure.
	Yeah, it's all pretty.
	You can get to their Instagram by their site too.
	So they're doing, they just finished Australia.
	We had a lot of people say thank you for hooking us up in Australia.
	When you go to these, they go to hotels around the world.
	You meet them, you give them your measurements.
	They show you a bunch of swatches.
	You feel like a monarch.
	You feel like the king of England.
	And then they go home to Hong Kong.
	They make the suit and they send it to you.
	It arrives in the mail and you got a cool wardrobe that fits perfectly.
	Like look how perfect this cut is.
	So, they'll be in New York, March 28th, 29th, 30th, 31st, April 1st, six days.
	They'll be at the Towers at the New York Lot Palace Hotel, 455 Madison Avenue.
	So book your appointment with them and then they'll give you the address and everything.
	Or you can call the main boss, Peter Daswani.
	His U.S.
	mobile is 662-422-1853.
	is 662-422-1853.
	They're in Boston, April 3rd to 5th.
	They're in Washington DC, April 6th to 8th.
	They're in Houston, Texas, April 10th to 12th.
	They're in Dallas, Texas, April 17th to 19.
	Chicago, Illinois, April 20 to 23.
	Denver, Colorado, April 24, 25.
	Denver, Colorado, April 24, 25, LA, 27, 28, 29, and then of course San Fran, April 30th to May 1st.
	That's three days.
	The hotels are listed here, but you can also, when you contact them, they'll make it clear where and when your appointment is.
	It's a fun appointment.
	I like to drag it out.
	I'll feel like 900 shirts.
	Put up a whole suit.
	Put a whole suit together with the buttons.
	What kind of buttons do you want?
	Or what do you want the inside lining to be?
	And then I might change my mind.
	No.
	And they'll also do crazy shit.
	Like I, you saw my Jesse James suit.
	I saw some old picture of Jesse James, you know, getting busted.
	I was like, that suit is a weird shape.
	I want that.
	No problem, Gavin.
	Here you are.
	All right.
	Let's get into some fun news.
	Now I yelled this across the studio, Ryan, but we're, we're separated by two walls.
	So I don't know if you heard me.
	Did we discuss this special needs comedian?
	Sped?
	Spaz?
	I don't know, we did not.
	We did not?
	I saw him on Kill Tony and I thought it was funny how women constantly complain that people don't laugh at their jokes because they see them as... We just can't handle a powerful woman like Roseanne Barr who's been doing comedy for 43 years, I believe.
	She started in 1980.
	Yeah, no one wants to hear her.
	She hasn't had an incredible career.
	Ladies, we're not laughing because you're not funny.
	So here's proof.
	This guy comes out, and he can't speak.
	You may have to scroll forward a bit to get to this.
	Fucking stupid.
	No, no, that's a little too far.
	Oh, okay, so he is... Oh, he can stand.
	That's good.
	Fucking sensation!
	I went...
	Canadian, of course.
	You're welcome, America, for all those funny guys.
	That's Scottish, by the way.
	The reason Canadians are funny is because it's Scottish.
	A goddamn sensation.
	I was drinking with this man for fucking five hours last night.
	That's not ethical.
	Having somehow the best conversations I've ever had with anyone.
	And how about one more time, ladies and gentlemen, this is A visitor from Canada, this is the great Aaron Belisle, everyone.
	Belisle, uh-oh.
	One of the devil's names.
	- One of the devil's names. - The most interesting thing about having cerebral palsy is that it makes other people fucking stupid.
	People come up to me and start gesturing at me yelling real slow like, "Hello, ooh, ooh." Can I pet your dog?
	Uh-oh.
	And I'm like, oh my, are you okay?
	Are you having a fucking stroke?
	A fucking stroke.
	That's the stroke you get when you're fucking.
	Yeah.
	Someone come help.
	Call 911.
	I can't do it.
	I think the funny thing there is the 900-11 part, right?
	No, the funny part is that he can't speak, so you can't call 9-1-1.
	I'll explain all crippled jokes to you, Ryan.
	Oh, the only funny part that I liked was the 9-1-1.
	Well, it's subjective.
	No, I think he's great.
	I mean, I guess I could.
	I sound a lot like someone who is having a stroke.
	Isn't it, when you see people that are mute, you're like, how are you mute?
	Can't you just talk?
	Doctors can go in and fix stuff.
	They do sex changes.
	Can't they go into your larynx and reboot it?
	You don't have the organs in there?
	Crippled people frustrate me.
	Unbreak his wrist there.
	Break it and set it again.
	Fix your shit, handicapped people.
	God, you're so lazy.
	I still sound less like an idiot than you do.
	He does a bunch of that stuff.
	He tells one great story about how he got an Airbnb, and the payment took a while to go through.
	So she shows up, she goes, get the fuck out of here, you scammer.
	She's scared of like squatters and shit.
	And then she sees him and she goes, oh my God, I'm so sorry.
	And then they got so scared of being sued, they gave him a free stay.
	Of course.
	He's like, this isn't a cane, it's a fucking magic wand.
	That's pretty funny.
	I have one suggestion for him though.
	So the way he's doing it on his phone, I'm sure he's got his reasons why, but it looks like it's in a text format and he's highlighting it and pressing speak.
	But now, if you were to record those ahead of time, then you could just shuffle through, know what the title is, and then just kind of press play on them, you know?
	Like a soundboard, instead of a text format.
	Because it takes them a long time and it kills... You're battling that deadline.
	He's not looking for tips, dude.
	He's fucking destroying... I'm pretty sure he could use some tips.
	Joe Rogan is talking about how amazing he is.
	Your stand-up at Guitar World is so embarrassing, I think you sued the company to make them take it down?
	No, it's still up.
	Let's see it.
	But I can talk.
	Let's see it.
	You'll notice that I'm speaking with my mouth.
	So this is Ryan.
	Ryan was just criticizing that handicapped person, saying he could be way better.
	So you go, oh, okay, you must be good.
	You'll notice this with almost all critics.
	I'm not criticizing his comedy.
	Even like Roger and Ebert, you go say, what did you make?
	And then you see the movie they, I think it was Valley of the Dolls.
	Is that what Siskel, one of the Siskel's or the Ebert's made?
	And it's like, this is so bad.
	It's kitsch.
	Like it's awesome.
	It's a great, terrible B movie.
	How are we doing with your guitar world there?
	I'm looking for it.
	It was Imperial Guitar actually.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	But you're missing the point.
	I'm not criticizing his stand-up.
	I'm telling him on a technical... Well, he obviously did type that in in advance.
	He can barely move.
	Yeah, so there's no point in having it be a text document.
	Do you understand that?
	So what should, what kind of document should it be?
	It should be recordings that he could sift through.
	How does he record them?
	He, he takes, he takes that and then you could record it.
	You have a friend that has like a, on iMovie you could do that.
	You could screen record it.
	So wait, you have someone recite his things?
	No, there's plenty of ways to do it.
	So I could have my phone talk and then just screen record it and then you could chop that just right in, in photos.
	And then you would just scroll through and then you would title it, Joke 1 and Joke 2.
	How does he record it?
	Okay, look.
	Anything that I play on my phone, I can screen record it.
	Right, but how does he make his voice heard?
	No, no, he does the same thing he's doing, but instead of pressing the speak button over and over again and highlighting texts, Then you just push the button of the recording.
	This is what he's doing.
	He's highlighting, and then clicking speak.
	You can see him do it.
	And now if I screen record that, Yeah, that's like one second faster.
	Ahead of time.
	And you don't even know if you're right.
	He might be just clicking pre-records.
	How do you know?
	Because I saw his screen.
	I just showed you his screen.
	He's like this.
	I don't think he's selecting a paragraph and then clicking speak.
	I think he's just clicking a button.
	I think he's already doing what you're saying.
	Anyway, you're powerfully killing the momentum of the show.
	That's what I saw.
	And that's the point.
	Momentum is important, young man.
	Yeah, well you definitely made the point that awkwardness can kill the momentum of something and ruin everyone's fun.
	You did a fantastic job of that.
	I'll hand that to you.
	Speaking of crippled comedians, have you ever seen Two Less Legs?
	Number two, L.E.S.S.
	Legs.
	He is an Antifa activist who just got a black guy fired for being a white supremacist.
	You can do the math on your own.
	But I checked out his comedy recently and compared to the guy we just saw, it's pretty fucking bad.
	His comedy is basically, haha, crippled people suck.
	And then you laugh because he's crippled.
	Right?
	Look up Two Less Legs on YouTube.
	Gotcha.
	Today.
	Momentum, man.
	I was.
	Two less legs, Antifa.
	How did you spell it?
	Don't put in Antifa.
	One word, number two, L-E-S-S, L-E-G-S.
	We gotta start hooking up my computer to this fucking screen because this is insane.
	There we go!
	Yeah!
	Can we get a yeah?
	Yeah!
	Kevin Hart's finally crippled!
	Going for the home squad, baby!
	I don't get this.
	Kevin Hart is finally crippled?
	Does he mean Tracy Morgan?
	And then he says Christopher Reese.
	Isn't it Christopher Reeves?
	Three years ago.
	Kevin Hart's not crippled.
	He's fine.
	And Tracy Morgan was also fine.
	He just pretended to be in big fucked up so he could get, I don't know, 200 million?
	He had a severe spinal injury.
	He's alright.
	- I'm talking too.
	You know the crazy thing is?
	Out of all the people in the world, he cheated on his wife.
	Can you believe that shit?
	Can you believe he even got married?
	He has kids.
	- Yeah, didn't he make the kids to get married before he was crippled? - The way he ended up, which I fully don't understand.
	I've been around a lot of crippled motherfuckers, and I don't understand how he happened.
	It's an anomaly.
	He had them before he was crippled, I'm pretty sure.
	You assume we know each other.
	Anyway, this asshole, if you jump ahead to 1.9, you can see how I learned about two less legs.
	He's part of this cavalcade of losers.
	The only guy who's not a piece of shit in this montage, this collage of people, is Fred Meyers.
	Oh, sorry, that's the store.
	Daniel Ducombe.
	We've had him on the show before.
	He dared to say that he doesn't think the Confederate flag is racist.
	Symbol of rebellion, you know like Billy Idol had on his guitar and the Dukes of Hazzard had on their roof It means I'm a rebel and I'm not listening to what the northerners that the authorities have to say There's a very strong argument for that.
	It's something I believe, but it's at the very least controversial.
	Well, these three Antifa people who are all criminal miscreants just got him fired.
	So the woman on the bottom is an absolute mental patient who keeps suing people.
	She tried to sue Andy Ngo for retweeting her.
	The guy in the bottom left is a pedophile!
	He's been caught with child porn, and then the guy in the top left is a cripple who we just saw do stand-up comedy, and he seems to want everyone else to be crippled.
	The attitude with a lot of these people, and it's true of Jason Charter, the guy that attacked me at CPAC, a lot of these crippled Antifa guys are just like, I'm fucked up?
	I'm a freak?
	Well, I want to drag the world down with me.
	So, the woman there in the middle, I'm sure her attitude is, I'm a mental patient?
	Well, I want everyone else to suffer.
	And I want the world to be as shitty as my brain is.
	And then the pedophile is like, I want being a freak to be normal, so I can fuck kids, and it won't be unusual.
	And then the cripple, of course, is like, well, if I can't have a happy life and walk around like you, Mr. Security Guard, then I want everyone else to be handicapped in some way.
	So if you scroll down, there's White Rose of Willamette.
	That's the chick I just showed you in the middle.
	She's like, stop hiring this guy.
	He's a white supremacist.
	And then Kroger is like, done.
	He's gone.
	Thank you.
	This is just like my show in Rutherford, New Jersey.
	The cops canceled it because Antifa threatened them.
	And I said to the chief of police, I go, you realize you work for Antifa, right?
	And what's worse, you don't just work for Antifa, you work for one dumb bitch at Antifa.
	She decides who gets to hear what in Rutherford, New Jersey.
	She's your boss, I said.
	And he goes, well, we'll have to disagree, agree to disagree there.
	We're constantly get where we that case is about to be won, but we're just constantly working.
	We're presently negotiating the numbers Stop hiring Proud Boys as security.
	And then look at two less legs.
	I am truly beyond shook right now.
	I am beyond angry!
	You're always beyond.
	Proud Boy and far right, unite the right, Andrew Duncombe, Duncombe?
	Duncombe?
	He's known as Black Rebel, is working security this moment at Fred Meyer Providence Park.
	As soon as I saw him, my heart dropped and my PTSD, all within seconds, reminded me of every threat I've ever had in my life, I assume.
	And then you look at the video and you're like, so this cripples Petrified of Proud Boy, black, white supremacist.
	Why are you filming him then?
	Shouldn't you be running, screaming?
	It's just like the black dudes who filmed the cops laughing.
	Go play the video.
	He protected his tweets recently.
	I can play it.
	I guess I follow him.
	Anyway, in the video, you see Andrew Duncan.
	What's his name again?
	I thought it was Andrew Duncombe?
	Yeah, you see Andrew talking to a guy going, oh, I know where that is.
	Just follow me here.
	It's at the end of aisle four.
	And then you see that guy like, oh yeah?
	Not on my watch.
	Shutting it down.
	And then keep going down there.
	So that's two less legs.
	We've seen this crazy bitch.
	I just explained her suing everyone.
	And then this guy.
	That's the other dude who got him fired.
	This is who we're up against.
	They're not sending their best.
	And this is why I'm so mad at us.
	For instantly capitulating to these fucking losers.
	It would be one thing if it was like a formidable voting force like moms against guns All right, that's they determine elections.
	I can see being intimidated by them.
	They represent more than half the country but this pedophile is telling you who can do security at your store and He's telling you that black people are white supremacists and you are accepting that Zoom out Maybe it's up?
	Go up a bit.
	No, no.
	Far to black security guard, white supremacist, the criminal case is still ongoing.
	Oh yeah, oh yeah, sorry, other minor detail, that dude stabbed Andrew.
	Fucking stabbed him right here too, which is a really dangerous place to be stabbed.
	Go back.
	There's a video of the stabbing.
	So they get this guy fired after they stab him.
	That's him in the black.
	He goes, why are you following us, dude?
	And then, stab!
	Did you just stab him?
	Bro, he just stabbed him, dude!
	This is... I'm showing you endless evidence that Antifa is the paramilitary wing of the DNC.
	They represent the establishment.
	They are the government.
	That's why they constantly get away with no charges.
	That's why, by the way, in 1-8, you see that John Sullivan, who was there, stormed the Capitol, claimed he was there as a journalist, he disguised himself as a Proud Boy, and CNN bought his footage for something like $25,000.
	Then, CNN was in trouble because they were hiring Antifa to go storm the Capitol dressed as MAGA dudes.
	called domestic terrorism.
	That's called entrapment.
	That's called being the news, not reporting the news.
	So what they did was they started hiring him to report on other shit.
	So now it looks like he's a real journalist.
	There he is.
	And the left seems to be learning this since Tucker.
	We already knew this.
	We knew John Sullivan.
	We watched his fake reporting.
	It's like David Shortell, the dude CNN sent to stake out Roger Stone's house and see if the SWAT teams show up.
	He showed up at 5.
	The SWAT teams were there at 5.15.
	It was a 15-minute stakeout because obviously the Feds called CNN.
	So CNN is a joke, but they don't cover their tracks.
	And then we have these lefties, Naomi Wolf isn't very lefty, but she's not really mega, saying, oh, OK, I get it now.
	Well, I'm glad you get it now.
	How long has Joe Biggs been in solitary confinement, rotting in jail with Ethan Nordean and Zach Reale, totally abandoned, no bail possible?
	They've been sitting rotting while you've been going, oh, maybe it wasn't an insurrection.
	Yeah.
	People don't insurrect and then have plans for lunch.
	They don't insurrect with no guns.
	But 1-7, you can see Naomi Wolf is finally ready to apologize to us.
	Move it over to the left so I can read it.
	It's tempting to sweep this confrontation with my own gullibility and move on without ever acknowledging that I was duped.
	Yeah, it's still in the way of the middle.
	Everything has to be past the middle mark for me to read it.
	These mistakes multiplied by the tens of millions of people just like me.
	I can't read it, Ryan.
	See where thousands is?
	That's my most right point.
	There you go.
	Keep going down.
	That erasure blah blah blah.
	I owe you a full-throated apology.
	Am I the only guy that thinks of intense blowjobs when a woman owes us a full-throated apology?
	Is she aware of that or am I just a very horny dude?
	I believed a farrago of lies and as a result of these lies and my credulity and the credulity of people similarly situated to me, many conservatives' reputations are being tarnished on false bases.
	The proximate cause of this letter of apology is the airing two nights ago of excerpts from tens of thousands of hours of security camera footage from the United States Capitol.
	Taken on January 6th, the footage was released by Kevin McCarthy to Tucker Carlson.
	While fact checkers stated it is misinformation to claim that Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi was in charge of Capitol Police that day, the fact is that the USCP is under the oversight of Congress, according to the United States Capitol Police.
	So thank you, Naomi, for apologizing to us.
	It's kind of late.
	And speaking of being patsies for a random Antifa complaint and altering someone's future because an Antifa pedophile is in a bad mood, the Feds themselves, 1-6, have done a terrible fucking job of
	their own domestic terrorism so we know that the feds do things like get online and say to dummies we should kidnap the governor and two or three of them will catch on so you have what eight people arrested or eight people involved in a plan to kidnap the governor when five of them were feds and three of them were us and that means the feds are out to frame us to trick us to get us thrown in prison which to me is Terrorism.
	So how is the FBI not a terrorist organization?
	And apparently they were involved with Proud Boys on January 6th, jinning them up and getting them going.
	And these retards didn't cover their tracks.
	So now we have after FBI agent caught lying on the stand and concealing evidence from defense attorneys.
	Motion filed this morning from Nick Smith, attorney representing Ethan Nordin.
	And Julie Kelly's fantastic, by the way.
	She goes on to explain that these agents hid messages going back and forth to Proud Boys, where God knows how involved they were with this shit.
	And they haven't covered their tracks.
	Which brings us to Jump Medic.
	Second sponsor of today's show, if you are going to take over the government, or go to a riot, or a biker rally, or any kind of road trip, you should have this Jump Medic pack.
	We've got two packs.
	There's a small pack, the black one, but this is the super deluxe pack, and if you've got a problem, something is going wrong, pull the tab here, and zoop!
	Look at that, it all opens up beautifully.
	Oh, sweet!
	We've got sutures and bandages and disinfectants and glasses, stethoscopes, blankets, bandages.
	This is everything you'd need for an emergency.
	There's even this thing.
	Oh, these are gloves.
	Ready to rock.
	It really is the kind of thing where if you don't have it you are kicking yourself for the rest of your life.
	Especially in this day and age where the country seems to be falling apart and you'd want to have...
	A backup plan.
	So it's great that you have a generator, it's great that you have some food supplies, some extra water in case the shit hits the fan, but if someone gets cut or someone gets hurt, you're going to want to have this.
	You buy it once, it's there forever.
	You can buy replacements for it.
	Where have I got it here?
	We'll get to Purple Works in a second.
	It's created by a paramedic who's a baby monster.
	The premier product is the JumpMedic Pro, which I just showed you.
	It comes in red or black.
	It contains a world-class first aid bag.
	So when you buy the JumpMedic, you get two things.
	There's a large first aid kit and then a smaller first aid kit, which you can load with supplies and keep in your car or boat or RV.
	The larger first aid bag comes stocked with nine pounds of first aid equipment.
	Absolutely everything you would need in a first aid kit, from bandages, To sutures, to medications, a flashlight, medical tape, blood pressure cuff, glucose meter, shears.
	You really just have to see their website to see the list of everything this kit comes with.
	It's quite extensive.
	I didn't know this, but bikers always have medic kits with them.
	Makes sense.
	If there's a shootout or something.
	So you should have it there.
	You should have it for a hunting trip in case there's an accident.
	If I ever respond to the text from the ad guy and give him my brother's address, I'm going to have one sent up there to my brother.
	He's a hunter.
	This is a fantastic kit for hunters, gun enthusiasts, police officers, nurses, paramedics, families, proud boys, model train enthusiasts, top G's, scrapbookers, Yelp reviewers, what?
	Even Antifa members who are watching the show and paying $10 a month to be insulted by me.
	Point being, this is a great product for absolutely everyone.
	This is an awesome company that I like more than a friend.
	Folks, it's the wild, wild west out there nowadays.
	The wild, wild west.
	Everything is dangerous.
	If you don't have a first aid kit, you need to get one yesterday.
	You don't want to be unprepared for a difficult situation.
	Well, it is a very unfortunate situation.
	Following through an old and out-of-date first aid kit, looking through expired medications, and asking yourself, does this do anything?
	Shit.
	Don't be caught bearing the brunt of a scenario you were unprepared for, like Ryan.
	Especially if you're the type that goes to political rallies, you need to get this first aid kit.
	Hey, let's get that Chinaman on the show today.
	Oh yeah.
	And Trump.
	Oh yeah?
	Both of the incredibly durable bags allow for flat access while in use, which you can see here.
	Just do anything?
	Which makes it quicker and easier to- that's a little late there.
	Jump Medic also sells refills for these kits, which I mentioned.
	You can get a refill subscription for $99 a year, and the ad man, just to bother me, has spelled it $99 sign.
	Because he knows that puts me in a bad mood for the rest of the day.
	I have a collection on my phone of maybe a hundred different people putting the dollar sign on the wrong side of the number.
	Ooh, that's a hate crime right there, bro.
	And it keeps getting worse and worse.
	It's becoming the norm.
	I'm only... I hate this fucking shit!
	I'm only 99% sure that he did this to fuck with me.
	Maybe he thinks that the dollar sign goes there.
	Sometimes the complaints will be false.
	Exposure, refill, medication refill, etc.
	If you don't have a first aid kit in your home, or even if you do, this is a great product, possibly the most comprehensive first aid kit at this price that is currently on the market.
	Go to jumpmedic.com, enter promo code RyanSucks, all one word, for 10% off.
	If you would never dare to type out the words RyanSucks, promo code Gavin also works.
	Oh, that's good.
	It's not a joke.
	Some people don't hate Ryan, and they might not want to type that.
	I mean, look at him.
	He's pimping.
	You have two promo codes there.
	I dropped this blanket in all the hullabaloo.
	Little tiny thing, warms you right up once you unravel it.
	Blanket boy!
	All right, that was kind of heavy of an intro.
	Let's have some fun here.
	How about some, this new movie Ghosted that came out.
	So, super hot chick, she's Cuban, actually Spanish, but her father was such a moron that he, and a socialist, that he moved from lovely Spain, probably Bartholona, to Cuba.
	They're all running to get out there.
	He moves to Cuba to support socialism.
	So she has a miserable fucking life.
	Her brother's an artist.
	In Cuba now, this is a recent law, if you want to have an art show, you have to ask the government permission and they look at your art and decide whether you're allowed to have an art show.
	That's Cuba.
	That's socialism.
	Way to go.
	And by the way, all you flunky, Antifa, lefty types who love socialism, I'll be the last to go.
	You'll be the first to go.
	Bye bye!
	Home to mommy!
	Nobody... Dictators don't like artists.
	They're not in the mood.
	Especially homosexual artists.
	What did Che Guevara do the second Cuba was liberated?
	Started shooting gays in the head.
	Don't like them.
	He's also very racist.
	He wasn't a fan of the Negro.
	So she escapes Cuba, gets fucked by a bunch of Hollywood stars, blows her way to the top of Hollywood.
	And now she's, I think, a 35-year-old spinster, no hope of ever getting married.
	And she does action movies.
	She's a 5'2", I believe.
	And this is a guy, Chris Evans.
	Now, Chris Evans, we've tried on his Captain America mask over at Beck's studio.
	It's this big.
	So he must be a midget too.
	And I've heard tale that he's such a left-wing cuck that even the leftists in Hollywood, the chicks, can't stand him because getting rammed by a tiny penis who's crying because he's a male feminist doesn't turn on any chicks.
	So I'm spending a long time to describe the personal lives of these two actors to say that this movie is even more ridiculous than it initially appears.
	I was just wondering if you wanted to, um, you know, go out sometime.
	You wanna get a coffee?
	Now?
	Yes, now.
	I'll just hang on.
	Dare they use Glaswegian performers or Scottish?
	I mean, I know this sounds crazy, but I think she might be the one.
	I think she likes me.
	She really is great.
	Be the man who goes along with you.
	She really is great.
	You'll see.
	Any word?
	Get your logos in there.
	Amy Sedaris!
	Amy Sedaris, another spinster who let her eggs dry up.
	She was in love with the Paul, what's his name?
	Danello?
	From Strangers with Candy and now The Colbert Show.
	He dumped her at 32.
	Now the world's greatest mom.
	She would have been such a good mom.
	Nothing.
	This is gonna be a horror, isn't it?
	Horror suspense.
	It's already a horror.
	See, you get it.
	It's a grand romantic gesture.
	Yeah, that is amazing, mate.
	5,000 miles to surprise a girl you've only met once.
	Especially if she's the one who ghosted ya.
	No, no, she didn't ghost me.
	She just doesn't have an international calling plan.
	Oh, right!
	Where am I?
	Oh, God!
	In a cave.
	You know how bad guys are with their caves?
	In children's comic books?
	Yeah, she's not your average gal, boys!
	Look at that!
	Oh my god!
	You shouldn't have followed me here!
	I am one of the world's most deadliest private eye mercenaries!
	I'm James Bond!
	I beat up all the bad guys with my roundhouse kicks.
	Look at her, she can't even run? - - - I saw the rock!
	I didn't know running was so masculine.
	They're really good at driving school buses backwards over cliffs.
	As men go... I'm scared!
	You know what I want to do?
	I want to sit with Nick DiPaolo and make... I want to strap him into a chair like the one Chris Evans was just strapped into and make him watch this movie.
	Hold his eyelids open, Clockwork Orange style.
	I can't do it anymore, Gavin.
	My suspension of disbelief cannot handle Charlize Theron kicking the shit out of the nine Russian mobsters.
	The hunter on the continent.
	I want her.
	Oh, Adrian Brody is a fuckin' foreign bad guy.
	Wait, so she's American CIA?
	With an accent?
	We trust her?
	Okay.
	She's from Cuba.
	I don't trust her.
	Wait, so she's American CIA with an accent?
	We trust her?
	Okay.
	She's from Cuba.
	I don't trust her.
	Who the hell are you?
	I'm the boyfriend.
	Ew, Helvetica?
	Gross, dude, more like.
	If I heard that girl wanted to beat me up, I'd said, she's hated that movie review.
	I would go, oh, that's weird.
	Yeah.
	She knows where your studio is in the Bronx.
	Oh, okay.
	She's going to come and kick the shit out of you.
	All right.
	Tell her, I guess we'll, we'll do it during lunch.
	Can I bring a magazine during the beating?
	In other news, actually, you know what?
	That might bring us to feminism.
	Yeah, I think that was a good segue into the subject known as feminism.
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	We are the storm.
	The very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
	You said I was too pretty to fight.
	That's toxic masculinity.
	You don't realize how your behavior is hurtful.
	So, we're in a bit of a pickle here, as a society.
	And, uh, men... When I was young, men would go out and try to get laid.
	They would eventually find someone they really liked fucking, and they got along with, and then they would marry her, and they would make babies.
	I shit on the baby boomers all the time.
	They did invent divorce.
	But as far as the first part goes, they did have the balls to put a ring on it and start making babies.
	Even when they were broke, they didn't say, I'm waiting to be able to afford a child.
	No, we, us Gen Xers, we lived in a bassinet in the bedroom.
	They had friends over on a Wednesday.
	They were pretty cool in their early years.
	Gen X, Gen X!
	Didn't do as good of a job.
	We were sort of traumatized by divorce.
	So when I look up my old high school buddies on Facebook, when I use someone else's Facebook, because I'm banned, I see about 50% of them having kids.
	I see none of them with six kids, but they usually have two and 50% of them have none, male and female.
	And I think they were hurt by divorce.
	So, uh, what's happening here?
	So, um, then we, we cut to millennials and zoomers.
	I'll lump them all together.
	So the problem with millennials is they didn't see their big brothers get married and, uh, they don't feel like doing it either.
	Having a baby is just not happening.
	So they live in a state of perpetual adolescence.
	And what the men do is they play video games.
	They try to fuck some chicks, but the chicks started talking about rape and saying that they're doing it wrong.
	And eventually, after people like Mattress Girl, destroying a man because he put it in the poop chute by accident, and she carried her on a mattress for several years, it was on the front page of New York Magazine, A lot of guys either killed themselves or said, I'm just going to become an incel.
	I'm just going to masturbate to porn and avoid women entirely.
	It's not worth the headache.
	And women weren't doing a very good job of making themselves appealing.
	They were cutting their hair short.
	We saw the intro, what feminists do to their bodies and how hideous they make themselves.
	And then here's the other thing.
	This birth control shit, these birth control pills, they make women repulsed by masculinity.
	That's one of the ways that a woman doesn't get pregnant, she doesn't like penises.
	So the only guys she's attracted to are total fucking pussies.
	And of course we see the proof of this after they get married.
	They stopped the hormones and they start becoming normal woman again, and they say their boyfriend smells different.
	They smell like not your boyfriend.
	Like our buddy Elle, what's her name, has a whole stand-up bit about that where she talks to the audience about who stopped taking birth control.
	No, it wasn't Elle, it was that religious chick, I forget her name.
	But they all start hooting and hollering in the audience talking about after they stopped taking birth control, they dumped their boyfriend because they weren't attracted to him.
	So anyway, that's what guys have to face.
	And then women have this like, where'd all the guys go?
	I can't tell you how many like old, I don't have a lot of female friends, but occasionally we'll get to talking like a barmaid or something and they're like, why didn't that guy hit on me?
	Doesn't this guy want to fuck me?
	And you're talking like what I would consider a late 7, 7.8, 7.9.
	And they're just like, where's the male libido?
	And I go, it's in a sock.
	After checking out RedTube.
	Anyway, I want to green screen this video of a woman basically saying what I just said, and because women are agreeable and the glass is always half full with them, they managed to take this apocalyptic end of civilization and say, things are going great!
	Let's check it out.
	You're about to hear bad news in a positive way, which is why women make great moms.
	Yes.
	Because they can take a shitty situation, a little crying kid, and make him feel good.
	We're not good at that, us men.
	And a child needs both.
	As I've said many times, I overheard a child who shat his pants.
	I was with him at the airport.
	He's in the stall next to mine.
	The dad was furious at the kid.
	You shit your pants?
	What's the matter with you?
	Cleaning shit off his legs.
	And then the kid went, I was almost going to intervene because the guy was being really mean.
	And then the kid goes out and is hugging his mom and his mom's like, it's okay.
	They were both right.
	You shouldn't shit your pants.
	You should be able to control your own fucking bowels.
	You shouldn't have your father wiping shit off your legs, you moron.
	At the same time, shit literally happens.
	I almost shit my pants today.
	Sometimes you shit your pants.
	And it sucks.
	So, mom should be there to make you feel better about the fact that you shit your pants.
	And dad should be there to say, don't shit your pants.
	And then as you grow up as an adult, you like, you feel a fart and you're like, uh oh, that made it to the undies.
	And you run to the bathroom and then you're like, Gavin, get your shit together, you fucking loser.
	But also, don't beat yourself up too much.
	It's called a well-rounded individual.
	Anyway, this woman probably had two parents, because she seems very well-rounded, but a little too well-rounded, because she's turning the end of the world into a good thing.
	There's never been a better time to be a single, straight woman.
	Well, it depends what age, my dear, especially in New York City.
	In New York City, if you're 30-year-old, and no 29-year-olds want to get married, because they're too young.
	In other words, this city is an elephant's graveyard for ovaries.
	Ladies, don't come here.
	You want to get married?
	Move to Kansas.
	I think there has never been a better time to be a single woman in the dating space seriously looking for a partner than ever before.
	And I want to talk about it.
	If you don't know me, my name is Simone.
	I'm a professional matchmaker with almost six years of experience.
	See, six years for a young single woman is a fucking lifetime.
	26 is very young, and if you get married at that age, you're probably gonna have five beautiful kids, and you'll die a very happy old lady.
	Six years later, you're 32.
	Everything's over.
	You might squeeze one out.
	It'll probably be autistic.
	Boots on the ground on how single people are thinking, how they're feeling, and how they're dating.
	I also work almost exclusively with men, so I have real insight into how modern men are thinking about dating and approaching dating dynamics.
	But let's get into it.
	Wait, stop.
	Is she a therapist for men?
	Hi, I want to date, so you pay her?
	Meanwhile, they all just want to fuck her.
	They all want a deep-throated apology from her.
	More single men in America looking for partnerships than women.
	That's bad.
	Why are there more single men than women?
	Am I dumb?
	Aren't there like 60% of the population or 55% is female?
	Who are all these women dating?
	Are they in polygamous relationships?
	Are they sister wives?
	I guess that really made America looking for partnerships than women.
	Oh, there are more single men looking for them.
	Oh, I see.
	I get what's going on.
	So this is catastrophic because these career gals are like, I don't want a relationship.
	I'm just focused on my career right now.
	Ladies, you're not a boss bitch.
	That's cringe, as our hot blonde friend pointed out.
	Stop it with your career.
	If you're an oncologist, you might have an argument.
	I don't know what you do.
	You're never doing that.
	You're doing marketing.
	You're doing bullshit we don't need.
	You're doing retail therapy.
	You're doing things that moms do.
	You're a real estate agent?
	Okay.
	When you go to someone's house and the woman takes you on a tour and shows you the new kitchen they just did?
	That's a real estate agent.
	You're just being a mom.
	Oh, you organize your boss's appointments?
	That's what moms do.
	They organize shit all day.
	Yesterday my wife went into the city for a class she's taking and it was absolute chaos.
	I had to take work off and go drive this kid there and then I had to drop him off at a babysitter and do 50 things.
	She was only gone for like five hours and it was the apocalypse.
	She's needed at home.
	What does that say?
	More than one in ten Millennials would consider becoming a sugar baby when desperate for some quick cash and men are like, oh so maybe they're just mistresses of old rich guys.
	That's great.
	You're a whore.
	A lot of single guys out there since whoredom became cool.
	I'm not a sex worker.
	I'm a sugar baby.
	This is a screenshot from an article in August that really made waves about how there are increasing numbers of men that are single and unhappily so, meaning that they are desirous of looking for long-term relationships and struggling to do so.
	So this is her saying, there's lots of lonely men out there is awesome.
	Cause you'll have your pick of the tribe.
	The grass is always greener.
	There's always a silver lining with this woman.
	Stop.
	So there's a massive wave of men committing suicide in this country, especially white men for some reason, probably because they're told they suck from kindergarten on.
	My youngest boy is doing a school project for Women's History Month.
	and talk about quality over quantity.
	There is a happy growing trend of men in therapy. - Stop.
	So there's a massive wave of men committing suicide in this country, especially white men for some reason, probably because they're told they suck from kindergarten on.
	My youngest boy is doing a school project for Women's History Month.
	I didn't know it was a month, I thought it was a day.
	And he's got that chick who was the first black girl to go to school.
	And I'm like, I don't know, man.
	All that girl did was go to school.
	She became a civil rights activist, but it was all the people that got her into school and defended her that are the real heroes in that story.
	I guess she became a civil rights activist after.
	That's great, I guess.
	I go, what about the Indian who showed Lewis and Clark how to explore the West without dying?
	She sounds pretty cool.
	So we're currently working on that.
	But, um, this woman thinks that men being lonely and suicidal is awesome.
	Lonely men is good because you can, you have more men to choose from because they want you so bad.
	And then the fact that they're so depressed, they have to go to a doctor to prevent suicide is good because men who go to therapy are better?
	What?
	They've been therapized?
	No.
	100% more likely to go to therapy than they were 10 years ago.
	And that number is steadily increasing.
	It's great.
	Therapy is great.
	By the way, Howard Stern goes every day and he's gone from a nervous Nelly in the eighties who had trouble talking to people to a man who has not left his home in three years.
	So it looks to me like therapy makes things a whole lot worse.
	and intuitive partners, men that are more communicative and have more emotional regulation tools.
	That's why they're in therapy, because they don't have those tools, because you took them away.
	Trying to improve their mental health and emotional quotient.
	They're trying not to die.
	There are more women with college degrees that are entering the labor force.
	This is terrible.
	Women have agency over their lives.
	Okay, stop.
	You know why there's more women with education?
	Because education has gone gay.
	And it's super easy to get a degree now.
	If you have 250 grand, you can barely show up for work and you'll get a degree in speech pathology.
	And then you can go out there into the labor force and make $40,000 a year trying to pay off your $250,000 forever.
	The quality of secondary education in this country is at an all-time low.
	It's never been worse in history.
	And we did that because, unfortunately, capitalism said, we can dilute our brand a bit here and make a lot of money by making college degrees fucking useless garbage.
	So, women got them.
	And then, women have brainwashed themselves into thinking, I'm a speech pathologist.
	I'm kicking ass, taking names, and saving the world.
	Yay for me!
	No.
	You want to impress us?
	Create and shape human life.
	That's a little more impressive than your stupid degree.
	- I agree.
	- For stability, significantly more career opportunities.
	- Women have more agency than ever before.
	- Finally and most importantly-- - So women don't need men anymore, she's saying.
	And that's good because women are empowered, But wait, there's a bunch of lonely dudes that want to help them.
	That's good too!
	Because now women have more men to choose from.
	All of these things are good.
	You would make a great mom because you can make even someone shitting their pants seem awesome.
	...women have access to and are deciding to freeze their eggs.
	Yeah!
	It's so exciting because this is leveling the playing field... That's exciting!
	...in the dating dynamics between straight men and women who want to eventually have families.
	Women no longer have to rush to make hasty decisions in their 30s if they want to have a family.
	They no longer have to be forced to... Whoa!
	So, wow, so you freeze your eggs in your 30s and when do you have a kid?
	In your 40s?
	That's no fun.
	Look, I'm an old parent.
	It's one of the reasons I tell people to get a ring on it and get moving.
	It's not easy getting no sleep in your 40s.
	In your 20s, I remember getting hangovers.
	I'd drink all night.
	I'd go to work having not slept a wink.
	And my hangover would start around lunch.
	It would be done in an hour.
	That's the kind of body God made for babies.
	The 40, 50 year old man, we're tired.
	We just want to watch Death Wish when we come home from work in our home bar.
	We're useless parents.
	So ladies, and here's another thing too, you're freezing your eggs.
	Your maternal instinct is still there.
	This is all based on the assumption that there's no yearning for babies.
	And I'm telling you, I've said this 1,000 times, almost every female parent I know, especially ones that I sort of grew up with, we'll look at each other while our kids are running around the house and we'll go, what the fuck were we waiting for?
	Why did we wait so fucking long?
	I managed to eke out three.
	Amongst my peers, I'm basically an Irish Catholic.
	Well, I guess I am an Irish Catholic.
	I have the equivalent of 12 kids in my house.
	And I look at my three kids and I go, fuck you, me.
	Why couldn't you have done five, you loser?
	And now that ship has sailed.
	And my kids are gone soon.
	I got one little one left.
	The others are teens.
	Teenagers just use your house as a hotel.
	They don't care.
	So, I fucked up.
	And I don't want you to listen to bitches like this and make the same mistakes.
	What career?
	Like, running a dating site?
	Helping men find women?
	That's the only good thing about this pathetic existence that young people have today and their total inability to hook up is you get people like her who can try to help them.
	We've created an industry.
	See?
	It's catching on.
	I can be positive too.
	allows them to take their time to seriously vet whether or not they want to have a family with a potential partner without running out of time.
	Biological clock is a bad thing, according to this woman.
	You shouldn't... What about youth?
	Should that even be a thing?
	You can get plastic surgery.
	Why not be a teenager when you're 45?
	Freezing their eggs.
	50% increase in women freezing their eggs in 2019.
	So exciting.
	So yeah, these are just a few happy trends that I'm noticing that I think are really exciting.
	So if you're ingesting a lot of negative content that feels disheartening about the dating scene right now, I just want to offer some important counterpoints.
	I'd say otherwise. - Wow, it's so meta.
	With that attitude, she'd be a great mom.
	Instead, she sits there looking at the death of moms and smiling through it going, that's a good thing.
	She should be looking at a shitty drawing going, that's a good drawing of a horse.
	Instead, she's watching the world end and going, that's a good drawing of the apocalypse.
	She's going to be old and lonely, and so will you, if you listen to bullshit like that.
	Music Purple Works pre-workout.
	I'm addicted to it now.
	My wife's addicted to what the dick did after I had it.
	Oh!
	Final sponsor today.
	Nice catch, McInnis.
	Purple Works pre-workout.
	I'm addicted to it now.
	My wife's addicted to what the dick did after I had it.
	Oh.
	Take it easy. - I'm not sure.
	I'm 53 years old.
	You're probably different to me.
	You probably work out longer.
	When it's weights day, I do half an hour.
	When it's boxing, I'll do like an hour.
	But I don't do a scoop.
	I do about a third of a scoop.
	Within minutes, I get these, I told you, I get these prickles in my hands.
	My hands and feet feel prickly, and now I'm excited because it means it's time to work out.
	Taking this and not working out, I would imagine would be very bad.
	And you'd be sketched out all day from the caffeine.
	But I take it, I go work out, and the other day we had this crazy workout, it was like, The bicycle, just legs.
	The bicycle, just arms.
	You know, one of those bikes with arms.
	And then all three for 45 seconds.
	And then, what was it?
	Two 25-pound weights.
	This for 45 seconds.
	I'm still feeling it, actually, right here.
	Too much.
	You think?
	Slow down.
	Too much.
	Well the great thing is I compete with the gym owner and he's always like, did Gavin do this?
	And I don't tell him that I was on Purple Works.
	Oh, it's like a little secret.
	So we're both murdering ourselves to compete with each other.
	And getting ripped in the process.
	Do you work out there, Billy Wong?
	Oh yeah, like a little.
	Like a yoga pose.
	Yoga's great, but it's just stretching.
	Like a lift weight.
	- Sometime? - Okay, so you do weights.
	- Five pound weight. - Then there was holding weights and stepping up on the box and stepping down.
	One right leg, 45 left, 45 both.
	Then it was lying down on your back and doing this thing, then standing up and doing that thing, Everything is 45 seconds each.
	And then, um, there was, I think, push-ups for 45 seconds.
	And then at the end it was a reverse, what do you call it, pull?
	And then, what are these called again?
	What?
	What do you have in your hand?
	A bar.
	Oh, yeah, that's for the shoulders.
	It's like a pull-up?
	Or not a pull-up.
	It's a... I forget what you call it.
	Fuck.
	Thanks for helping out.
	And then there's this one.
	I forget what they're called.
	45 seconds.
	And we'd used up the half hour.
	And the owner of the gym had come in and started my old, what I just told you, with the bike.
	And I was like, no, no, I don't want to leave.
	Can I stay and finish it?
	He's like, okay, you're free to go, but then I did the shoop and the shoop.
	So there was 45 seconds of these, 45 seconds of these, and then 45 seconds of this.
	It's killing me, what the hell?
	And it was the purple works.
	I just plowed right through it.
	And the funny thing too is like, I said, if you take it and you don't work out, you feel kind of sketchy.
	When you do work out, it's like you used up the purple works and now there's no sketchiness anymore.
	You used all the sketchiness went into the workout.
	And your hands don't feel prickly anymore either.
	That's like a high pull.
	Nope.
	Does it look like this?
	No.
	It's just normal weights, dude.
	Yeah, like this.
	You go... Maybe it wasn't reversed like that.
	Maybe it was normal.
	What is this called?
	That's a curl.
	Oh yeah, curl.
	And then what's this called?
	A press?
	Let me see you.
	You bring them up like that?
	Well, yeah.
	Maybe it was this?
	You probably, yeah, there you go.
	That's what you probably do.
	I mean, you could also do this.
	You do this and then put them up.
	No, it's a bar.
	How am I twisting my wrists in the middle of it?
	Oh, so then you probably did it pronated.
	I told you it was a bar.
	You said regular weights.
	Plural.
	No, I didn't.
	And when I showed you this and you said no, dude.
	Yeah, well, I guess it was that.
	Yeah.
	So high pull and then a press.
	Let's talk to the trainer.
	See if he's there.
	Little does he know he's in a commercial.
	Barbell Hypo.
	I've never called him before.
	In a press.
	Hello?
	This is a first.
	What if he starts yelling at you?
	Get down, give me 20!
	What if he just went, hello, what can I do for you?
	Your call has been forwarded to a... He's probably, come in.
	I'll text him a...
	Would you like to text his email?
	No, his number.
	Thanks for the options.
	What was that last exercise with the bar?
	Anyway, sorry.
	I bet I covered everything here, right?
	No.
	Purpleworks.
	Purpleworks?
	No, I don't think you even covered the half of it.
	It's a pre-workout.
	It enhances your strength, energy, and focus to get you ready for even the most strenuous workouts.
	Some other nefarious pre-workouts on the market have 700 billion and a trillion, 300 million, billion, million ingredients.
	Not Purpleworks.
	No artificial dyes, no sweeteners.
	It's simply an expertly crafted blend of high-quality creatine, caffeine, carnosine, beta-alanine, vitamin D and C, green tea extract, and not much more than that.
	Um, before I used Purpleworks, I felt ugly, I felt gay, but look at me now.
	I felt ugly, I felt gay.
	The packaging says it's something like 30 servings, but in fact, you can easily double that.
	It's probably a good two months or more.
	If you're a female cop who needs a boost when you're failing to cuff a large man, or if you're a male who has big fucking tits, you need to go to purpleworksnutrition.com right away.
	They also have a shaker for sale, I use that too, for a great price, just under $10 if you use promo code GAVIN.
	Uh, finally the ad guy wants me to read this.
	You ready?
	Some people say, hey Gavin, isn't purple a gay color?
	And to that I say, that's not true.
	It doesn't say that.
	You're a liar.
	Purple is a regal color that represents rarity, royalty, knowledge, and quality.
	Purple was the favorite color of Prince, who was basically royalty.
	And you'd have to be ridiculously stupid to ever think that Prince was gay.
	That means you're gay.
	The founder of Purpleworks is a longtime paramedic and baby monster with a great sense of humor.
	I'm rooting for his company and I'm happy.
	I've been happy using his products.
	Good spelling and grammar in an ad.
	Is baby monster capitalized?
	I don't know, but all I know is we have to go to court.
	Why?
	Um... I have bad news.
	There's a... There's a K-pop band called Baby Monster.
	Oh, great.
	The last evaluation.
	Or is this a show?
	What the fuck is this?
	Maybe that's our fans.
	Don't assume that this isn't us.
	That's Jungle Asian right there.
	I didn't hear Annyeonghaseyo Gavin or Annyeonghaseyo Ryan.
	Yeah, they want to say they're not fans.
	They're just people who support the show.
	What the fuck is going on with him?
	Is that the choreographer?
	I didn't hear Ryan Pego Pajucata.
	Right?
	Because they're not our bitches.
	They're their own thing.
	But they are.
	But they didn't mention the bird which is the bald eagle?
	Yes they did.
	They said it in Korean.
	We like hip.
	This is the last evaluation.
	You could fuck that guy and it would be totally straight.
	Nobody would say you're a fag.
	Alright, we're running out of time here.
	I don't recommend that, by the way.
	You don't recommend what?
	Fucking that guy.
	I'm just saying you could.
	You don't recommend fucking that guy?
	No.
	Why not?
	Because I don't think it would be consensual because Koreans have different laws.
	Okay.
	It's true.
	Let's jump to racism just a little bit before we go.
	I did a massive racist marathon where I caught up on 111 stories and I stuck it in one.
	How long is that episode?
	Oh my god, probably like three and a half or four and a half hours, I forget.
	I thought it was more like eight.
	Two, four, six... It could be anywhere from four to six, but I don't think it goes to eight.
	Okay.
	Small racism, small bumper.
	Let's talk about racism.
	That was racist, guys.
	Remember that one?
	Here is a lady who could not take it anymore.
	No, here is a lady who just spontaneously has decided to shit on white people at her school and make everyone feel uncomfortable because she's black, very black, and everyone else sucks.
	Let's see this bitch.
	Okay, I'm in.
	Excuse me!
	If y'all didn't know, this is the MSC, and frankly, there's just too many white people in here, and this is a space for people of color.
	So just be really cognizant of the space that you're taking up, because it does make some of us POCs uncomfortable when we see too many white people in here.
	It's only been open for four days, and frankly, there's the whole university for a lot of y'all to be at, and there's very few spaces for us.
	So keep that in mind.
	Thank you.
	She proceeds to sit on her ass and do nothing.
	Now wouldn't it be funny if they really push that?
	So this is self-segregation of course.
	I don't understand why you need this space.
	The implication is that when black people, Indians, gays, whatever, I don't know if gays are of color these days, they're definitely rainbow inclined, that when they walk through campus people are like, well, well, well, looky here.
	Some negro thinks she's gonna read a book, boys!
	Hey, guys!
	We got a black scholar over here!
	And she's like, guys, just fuck off, please.
	And then she finally gets a space where there's no tough guys going, well, well.
	Which is... retarded.
	I'm calling this show Special Needs.
	That is beyond movie.
	If that was in a movie, you'd go, this movie's stupid.
	I'm not watching this.
	This is dumb.
	Things that never ever happen for 500 Alex?
	Dairy double.
	Yeah.
	Or not.
	Like, you're in a shitty, you're in The Wild Ones, basically.
	With Marlon Brando.
	Who I named my son after, by the way, Johnny.
	Um, you're in like a cheesy 1950 black and white movie.
	That's not what your campus is like.
	In fact, you're probably at that campus because you're black.
	You're probably a recipient of affirmative action.
	But anyway, it would be cool if they kept pushing that.
	Yeah, they're there.
	and they said, "The people that are maintaining this "are seen to be white, and we wanted only people of color "to be not just involved in hanging out here, "but maintaining the furniture and the heating "and everything else.
	"We want it to be a truly safe space." Yeah, they're there.
	Hey, what are you doing at this university, you black person?
	I don't know.
	I'm not in the mood for you.
	You should be in your own space.
	I'm gonna play some screwdriver on the jukebox just to make you feel uncomfortable.
	- Du, du hast, du hast mich. - He's playing jazz because he's a rebel and it makes people uncomfortable.
	We're still using African-American culture to make our fellow whites uncomfortable.
	That's why N.W.A.
	was so popular, by the way.
	That was white people trying to freak out their fellow white people.
	Mostly their parents.
	Most of American leftist culture is, fuck you, dad.
	Including this movie.
	This movie started it, actually.
	This and Rebel Without a Cause started cool.
	And a big part of cool is like, I'm down with the Negro and you're not.
	You know what's crazy is counterculture would be niggas without attitude right now.
	Like, hello, how are you?
	Everything's fine.
	Yeah, well that's black conservatives.
	Or niggas without anime.
	That would be really something.
	What are you doing there, Tim?
	Taking the thing off the front?
	That's called the arm breaker because it would so often spin out of control and snap your arm.
	A buddy of mine just bought one of those Model T Fords.
	He's got it for like seven grand.
	He's going to fix it up.
	You know what they're worth in the market?
	Yes.
	$2,000.
	No, that's fucking retarded.
	No, it's not.
	$1,400.
	$14,000.
	$14,000.
	So he's going to bust his ass, put in another $3,000, and make $4,000.
	Did I see that the other day at his shop?
	Yeah.
	Wow.
	It looks cool as shit.
	It's not a good investment.
	You'd think you'd want one.
	Whatever.
	You know that that that rare car insurance I tried to get it for the Jag you have to only drive it like ten times a year Like the Jay Leno insurance or something.
	Yeah Anyway, so they make it that their space and then there's a so whites go Okay, we're gonna have a whites only space and then within five years.
	It's like South Africa and the blacks only space is fucking destroyed.
	Oh Furniture's falling apart, and the whites-only space is like Wakanda.
	And then the blacks get mad that they're not invited to the whites-only space, and they call it apartheid.
	And then they have a mini-space inside that space.
	Oh, wow.
	Yeah, they get one section, and then they slowly take it over, and then it turns to shit, too.
	And then they complain, like, they forced us here.
	We didn't want to come here.
	This space landed on us.
	Whatever.
	I thought this was funny.
	Jack Posobiec sent this to me today.
	Jared Holt was just called out by Glenn Greenwald.
	Again, the theme of this show is like all of these mainstream people going, oh, fuck, I was wrong.
	Yeah, Gavin was there before any of you.
	Like I was attacking Jared Holt years ago, screaming at him that he looks like a glass of water with one drop of milk in it.
	I go, you're nothing.
	All you do is acquiesce.
	And the Jared Holt's of the world, the Christopher Mattias, the fucking, uh, Will Summers, these hate watch clowns, they've devoted their lives to combing through the behavior of the white right and trying to find examples of them being prejudiced, bigoted.
	Now, no one told them that this group is the least racist group in the world.
	We're all based on meritocracy.
	The best guy for the job is a blind black Chinese guy.
	Then get him in there.
	If a blind black Chinese guy sucks, but it's good for your quotas, well, then fuck my quotas.
	I don't want him here.
	He's not good at it.
	So when someone is based on meritocracy, when they're sort of a libertarian conservative who wants good borders, you're not going to find a ton of racism.
	But because, I don't know, secular Jews told them that this has to be done to prevent World War Three, they think they're preventing the Fourth Reich and a new wave of Nazis.
	Now, if you want to find racism, you should look everywhere but white males.
	White male conservatives are the least racist people in the world.
	You want to find racism, check in with Asians, check in with blacks.
	Especially anti-Semitism.
	Check in with basically every other group.
	Students, for fuck's sakes.
	Students of color.
	We just saw examples of them being racist.
	So these guys are, they're basically the equivalent of Ghostbusters.
	You know these morons that would go from, oh there he is.
	That's Will Sommer.
	- Hey Will, you piece of shit.
	You tattletale. - Why did they kick us out?
	What the fuck? - That's your career.
	You're a tattletale.
	Nice job.
	Nice legacy.
	You know what?
	I hope you are a fed, 'cause at least that'll be interesting.
	What are you, security? - That's Zachary Pizzoletto or whatever, standing in front of Will Summer like you're gonna protect him. - He's the cunt squad.
	Look at these fucking horrible, weak losers.
	Look at these shitty human beings.
	Their whole job is being a tattletale.
	What a bunch of fucking losers.
	Why are they at CPAC?
	You'd be amazed at who they let in this year.
	Just like, media madness or something?
	Bad one.
	It's literally at the Gaylord Center.
	Are you ready for a Neutron Bombo, Jared Holt?
	He's straight.
	Wow.
	What?
	That birth control really is fucking with women's taste in men.
	They're dating homos now.
	Um, so, uh, they're like the guys who go to the old houses.
	Let me see him.
	What about the Aryan Brotherhood?
	Do you investigate them?
	That sounds like some bonafide white nationalist.
	You look like milk.
	You look so weak.
	You know what you look like?
	Someone has a glass of water and they just put in like four drops of milk.
	You just seem to have this sort of sad acquiescence to you.
	You just look like you could just spill all over the ground.
	Are you gay?
	I used to know this.
	I'm so un-homophobic that I forgot.
	How was that line of coke that you did?
	Oh, I know you!
	How you doing?
	That's Jason Charter.
	How was that line of coke you did?
	People don't realize that he can barely walk.
	He looks like he's in the Addams Family.
	And just like the guy we started with, less two legs, these cripples, they want everyone else to be somehow handicapped.
	So he wants to ruin everything.
	He must have not a long life ahead of him.
	I mean, look at him.
	And the guy walks like he's being raped up the ass.
	Like he's like...
	So I think that and then I forget who it was it was maybe it was Jacob Wall who goes it's possible that some of these cripples like they're in pain so much it becomes part of their vocabulary and they want to be beat up like they want more abuse it becomes like part of their vocabulary.
	Is that Glenn Greenwald right there?
	I don't know, but is this an update?
	This came out January... Oh, no.
	This is... I think this is new to us.
	Yeah, I saw this.
	We did?
	Okay.
	Is that a Brooks Brothers tie?
	Look at him.
	What disease do you have, dudes?
	Dudes?
	You make AIDS look like the common cold.
	to share after receiving it while appearing in court virtually.
	Okay.
	So Jason, you were just, I saw this.
	We did.
	Okay.
	Is that a Brooks Brothers tie?
	Look at him.
	What disease do you have?
	Dudes, dudes, you make AIDS look like the common cold.
	Look at him.
	That's bad, yeah.
	That's when he was attacking me saying I was doing cocaine on the podium when the previous night at Alex Jones' thing I was pretending to do cocaine on the podium.
	Right.
	I had to explain to him it's not coke, it's a joke.
	I think that's Glenn Greenwald.
	Anyway, let's get back to Glenn.
	Oh, sorry, let me finish my analogy.
	So these Mythbuster guys, right?
	Not Mythbusters, Ghost Hunter guys.
	You've seen the old shows where they go in and one fucking tech guy goes and pushes a chair downstairs and they go, did you hear that?
	And they got some dumb meter.
	It's all fake.
	I don't believe that these people believe that they're catching ghosts.
	It's all a scam.
	But just like tarot cards, people like it.
	They think it makes them feel better.
	But their dead aunt and their dead Grammy and maybe she can see me and she's haunting the room.
	All right.
	But imagine that was your entire life.
	That was your entire career.
	And the only thing you did was hunt ghosts.
	Because that's what racists are in the white male conservative biosphere.
	They are ghosts.
	They don't exist.
	They're silly.
	You might find, like I said to Jared right there, maybe join like the Biker Club Aryan Brotherhood.
	You might find them.
	There's probably four Klansmen in the Deep South somewhere.
	They're all 75 years old.
	Yes, there's five.
	They exist.
	But you've dedicated your life on the assumption that it's me, Proud Boys, Roger Stone, Donald Trump, fucking Glenn Greenwald, Elon Musk.
	All of these guys are secretly Nazis.
	And it's embarrassing, because that's your legacy.
	Like, you're going to be on your deathbed going, wait a minute, I chased ghosts my whole life?
	And the irony about all this is, they're doing it on the auspice of, well, we have to root out Nazis before they get big.
	So Proud Boys are like the brown shirts when they just started.
	And if we can nip this in the bud, we won't have World War III, right?
	They're preventing, they're saving the world.
	And I think it was Jack who pointed out, he goes, yeah, so you went from doing listicles at BuzzFeed to saving the world the next day?
	Does that sound unusual to you?
	That's like I was playing Madden on PlayStation, and then the next day I'm deciding who goes in the NFL.
	No, dude, you're not.
	Yes, you're helping get people fired and canceled, but that's because we live in a weak culture.
	You didn't prevent the Fourth Reich, you just fucked up with, you fucked with someone's life.
	You're not playing football, you're not in the NFL, you're playing fantasy football.
	You dork.
	So you look at what these people are doing and you go, wait a minute, you're working for some big fake globalist think tank that has all of these globalist companies pouring millions into it and your job is to fuck with people like me.
	So you are the baddies.
	So your assumption, and I think a lot of them truly believe this, is that they're saving the world by getting rid of Nazis, but they're the Nazis.
	They're the ones working with globalists and They are the ones who want to destroy the world.
	So you think you're saving the world, but you're on the side of the globalists.
	What do globalists want to do?
	Destroy the world.
	You're on the side of the manufactured pandemics.
	You're on the side of the obliterating the poor.
	You're on the side of let them eat bugs and live in pods.
	That's your team, you fucking loser.
	So that's what Glenn was saying in that brief thing.
	Pull it up again.
	That's Jason Charter retweeting Hasan Piker.
	Okay, I don't care.
	So he goes, I guess Jared Holt isn't at the Atlantic Council, he hasn't been there for a few months, now he's with ISD Global.
	It's all the same shit, these dumb think tanks.
	And let's look at who funds ISD Global.
	We've got the Ministry of Justice and Security in the Netherlands, right by the EU, New Zealand Department of Internal Affairs, we've got all these EU globalists, Australia, Sweden.
	Keep going?
	U.S.
	Department of Homeland Security.
	Oh, look at this rebel working for the state in our new Soviet culture, where you tattletale on people you think are bad.
	And of course, we've got Bill and Melinda Gates, who are buying up all the farmland in the country.
	Oh, and ADL, Anti-Defamation League.
	Great.
	The only thing you can do with these people, by the way, is keep hammering them.
	Stay on them.
	I mean, I was able to raise $250,000 to sue the SBLC.
	I don't think it'll ever end up in court, but I consider that a victory.
	We got rid of the founder, Morris Dees.
	We got rid of the president.
	What was his name?
	Morris Dees, Richard Schluckelberg, the head of legal, the top researcher.
	We decapitated the organization.
	And then they got Tina Tchen to come in.
	She's a woman of color.
	Unfortunately, she was so steeped in the Juicy Small A controversy, they had to dump her the next day.
	But who was the president guy?
	Richard Cohen?
	Let me see his face.
	Does that sound familiar?
	President of the SPLC, speaks to the meter after... Yeah, that's a very old picture of him, I think.
	Richard Cohen is the one who said, ha ha, his lawsuit means nothing to us.
	And the fact that he wants to sue us is a great example of who we're after, and it shows we're over the target.
	Because that's exactly the kind of person we want to be pissed off at us.
	Next day, I'm quitting!
	You can't get my emails in Discovery.
	Oh, and he fired Morris Dees himself, and then he quit.
	Victory.
	Morris Dees and the time.
	And finally, before we get to the mailbag, here is a random British comedian who was in that movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
	A random funny hippie dude who moved to LA, a bit of a starling as far as his survival abilities here in America, doing way better journalism than all of these ghost chasers combined.
	This is my idea of good information.
	A new take on something that's right in your face and no one is talking about.
	Pipeline, which, you know, was blown up mysteriously.
	Guess what's happened?
	Since it's been blown up, the U.S.
	has done a load of gas deals with European nations.
	Wow!
	What an extraordinary coincidence!
	The U.S.
	is set to double its gas exports to the U.K.
	under plans to clamp down on rising living costs by weaning Britain of Russian energy.
	That was always the intention, to just take over gas exports from Russia.
	Why take my word for it?
	You simply want to change the structure of energy dependence.
	You want to change that structure by blowing it up.
	For years we've tried to get the Europeans to be interested in different pipeline routes.
	It's time to do that.
	You want to depend more on the North American energy platform.
	Have pipelines that don't go through Ukraine and Russia.
	But there is a pipeline going through Ukraine and Russia.
	Not anymore there isn't!
	If Russia invades, there will be no longer a Nord Stream 2.
	We will bring an end to it.
	How will you do that?
	I promise you we'll be able to do it.
	So, nothing to worry about here then.
	Oh, that's tricky he's got.
	You know what's crazy?
	It's a very risky thing to, it's an act of war to destroy Russia's pipeline, but it seems to have worked.
	I guess.
	It's kind of badass.
	I'm kind of with Condoleezza Rice and Joe Biden here.
	Our economy needs a boost.
	Why should Europe be giving money to Russia when we can have it?
	You know I wanted to invade Greenland.
	So though it is corrupt and evil and incredibly dangerous, unlike Russell, I think I'm for this.
	But at least it's fucking... This is news.
	That story that just came up, that's real news.
	It's actually relevant.
	It exists.
	Working for a hate watch globalist company?
	That's all about destroying free speech.
	That's really what you're doing.
	You ruin people's lives because someone paid you to.
	You're a shithead.
	And the only time I'll excuse it is if the person doing it is so severely crippled that I understand their malevolence.
	Anyway, speaking of anger, I think it's time we checked out the mail B. Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	So my trainer texted me back, you did three with it.
	Clean, overhead press, clean and press.
	Okay.
	So I guess this is clean.
	A clean is in one fell swoop, you do that.
	Like this.
	No, that's a clean and press.
	A clean, to my knowledge, is that full movement.
	No.
	Clean, and then overhead press.
	Overhead press is that.
	And then clean and press.
	A clean is just, according to him, is just the one thing.
	Huh.
	So it stops at the shoulders then?
	Do you do it?
	And then you press, oh I see.
	Yeah.
	When in doubt, just say the opposite of what Ryan says and you will be right.
	Okay, first letter here.
	I think people have figured out when I do the letters page because from when I send you the show notes to when I go to check the mail, there's a hundred letters.
	So the answer is no.
	Okay, fuck.
	I saw a compliment and I'm a sucker for attention.
	Gavin, cops and robbers the best thing you've ever done.
	I like your banter with the guys.
	I like John busting Maddie's chops.
	I like how Ryan is more careful to insert any input because he's in a room full of alphas.
	That is not true.
	It's a great show, and I really hope you do whatever it takes to keep those guys coming back on Thursdays.
	Thank you for your letter, Chris.
	You don't need a comma before and unless you're doing a list, in which case it's called an Oxford comma.
	And it beautifully splits a sentence on its own.
	We don't need you.
	Um... Hey guys, this movie seems pretty interesting.
	This guy sent us this email twice.
	Where are we here?
	It's the top one.
	Interesting movie trailer.
	I gotcha.
	This movie does look really cool.
	It's kind of got favorite movie vibes.
	Hebs, although it's in French.
	Nice kick.
	Ooh, that's gotta hurt.
	Then he blasts him with cigarette smoke.
	Sucks.
	why are you wearing weird outfits oh got him Coolest Avengers in the world.
	I would activate the Vince.
	Superhero movie for idiots.
	We're trying to destroy a small planet.
	We're going to finish.
	We're going to go.
	It looks like a higher IQ space ball.
	Oh, man.
	I dream.
	Your mamelles have still got volume.
	And it's called "Smoking Causes Coughing." - With this glass that cools out of his mouth.
	I didn't think that until then, in fact. - Zonked out nonsense?
	Okay.
	Kind of sketched out by the fact that that guy sent it in twice.
	Oh, I see what happened there. - Yeah.
	I live in Kansas City.
	It's called Antifa License Plate.
	I live in Kansas City.
	There's a black car running on the city.
	The license plate literally says Antifa on it.
	I thought Antifa was a domestic terror organization.
	Yeah, you could have Antifa on your license plate because they are part of the state.
	They are mainstream.
	That is the boss.
	They decide who works security.
	They decide everything.
	Oh, here's a funny video someone sent in, a woman sent in, Faye sent in, about a gay man coming to terms with the fact that he fucked too much.
	Now, I think we're all mature and we can admit that HIV comes from not just being a homosexual and minding your own business.
	It comes from rampant butt-fucking, insane over-the-top orgies, doing crystal meth, fucking for three days at a circuit party.
	It's not easy to get AIDS.
	You really gotta split an ass.
	So when you see a gay with HIV, know that this guy has been fucking in ways that if you saw, you would vomit.
	Instantly.
	He's had like nine-sums.
	It's like this much jizz at the bottom of the jacuzzi.
	The jizz-coozy.
	- Excuse me. - Completely correct.
	I really do need some more time to process this because once I post this, I'm going to be known for having HIV.
	And I'm not sure if that's what I want to be known for right now.
	Like I'm scared it's gonna overshadow everything else that I've done.
	With a change of subject, my first doctor's appointment related Women are freezing their ovaries!
	He's like, I got AIDS!
	I just applied to become the cotton candy at a carnival.
	They're gonna tell me how many white blood cells I still have and I'm gonna get medicated I fly back tomorrow and I have so wait a minute This is just like that chick cuz I've got great news women are freezing their ovaries He's like I got AIDS.
	I just applied to become the cotton candy at a carnival Catch up on it's crazy.
	I've just been like like cotton candy hair That depressed but I don't know school doesn't stop for shit It's gonna be really scary for me flying back is only my friends here It's gonna be scary for the person sitting next to you also He's scary for anyone who wants to buttfuck you from now on.
	Everyone who's ever buttfucked him is going, uh, when did this diagnosis go down?
	Oh boy.
	World's worst dad.
	I don't really have that many people to talk to.
	Wow.
	Except for my parents, of course.
	My mom's...
	Oh, boy.
	...to me to San Diego to make sure everything...
	World's worst dad.
	Wow.
	World's most Jewish mom.
	Wow.
	Thanks for the nose, mom.
	She looks like if Israel and Palestine got along and had a baby.
	People in my life for this process.
	Ooh.
	Ooh.
	Fuck, dude.
	Nice work, dad.
	Thanks, devil.
	Way to go, pops.
	This is Christine.
	Oh, wait.
	No, I think we already covered that.
	Yeah.
	I stole her letter and put it in the notes.
	Here's someone who wants to show us gay porn.
	Gay for men porn.
	Is that what we call it?
	I think so.
	Or do we call it man porn?
	Maybe we just call it gay porn.
	I think we just call it gay for men.
	We call it Gay For Men.
	That's my brother.
	All right, what do you got?
	Let's see.
	Strip thread repairs using Helicoli inserts, pair of Brembo brake calipers for a Subaru WRX, three stripped holes, one broken bolt.
	All right, so the bolt seems to have trouble getting in there because the threads are toast and they're going to fix it.
	But we'll see.
	We will see.
	Two videos about stripped holes in a row.
	That's wobbling all over the place.
	Those threads suck.
	So, you just take a little off the top.
	Okay, I understand that, I guess.
	Wait, you got a drill?
	How are we gonna replenish threads that are completely gone?
	I thought they were gonna take stronger threads and just sort of redo them.
	Okay, now you have no threads.
	So you fucked up.
	Wait, what's this?
	Why didn't you do that the first time?
	Okay, so now they're carving new threads in, but dumbass.
	The bigger diameter?
	It's bigger diameter.
	The threads just, the bolt is just gonna wobble around in there.
	You might, you might have nice threads, but you don't got nothing to bolt it into.
	What are you gonna do now, dummy?
	What's that?
	Oh my gee.
	Oh, he put an adapter on it.
	The new set of threads goes in the new set of threads and that brings it back to the original size.
	Look how perfect that is.
	Knock out a few loose pieces and perfection.
	That is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
	Wow.
	And unlike that other guy, completely fixed.
	You're awesome, dude.
	You're the opposite of AIDS.
	All right, let's get to the final vid.
	Sure.
	You may have noticed that I'm looking at you more this episode.
	I adjusted the camera.
	I was watching my own show, which sounds vain, but you should always do that.
	If you're a writer, you should always be reading what you wrote.
	If you do this, you should be watching what you made.
	If you're a podcaster, you should be listening to your own show!
	And I noticed I was looking off like a few degrees and it, it looks duplicitous.
	That's what people do when they're lying.
	They look over to the left.
	Duplicitous.
	So now I'm looking, I'm looking over to the left right now.
	I'm looking at the video, but now I'm looking at the camera and that should be your eyes.
	So I hope this helps with our relationship and it's, you see my sincerity more clearly.
	Anyway, this is Friday.
	We're off for the weekend, about to have some fun.
	Tomorrow is the Gavin McInnes Show.
	It's this show seven years ago, eight years ago now, I guess.
	We do that every Saturday.
	There's also tons of new shows, new content every single day, building on a daily basis.
	Hope to get Tommy Sotomayor in here soon.
	His studio was completely flooded and he's having to rebuild it from scratch.
	But anyway, here's a guy on a hammock and a lady lying next to him.
	Look, he doesn't jump in to get her.
	He's caused all this.
	Shouldn't he be in there?
	And what's that green light down there?
	Is it a swimming pool?
	It looks like a dock.
	I hope she's okay.
	Alright folks, that's it.
	Have a fun weekend.
	Try to stay off your goddamn phone.
	Spend some time with your kids.
	And if you're single, don't end up like that woman trying to make a happy mountain out of a shitty molehill.
	Try to get married.
	Put a ring on it.
	Be yourself.
	Be who you are.
	Get out there.
	Have some interests.
	If you want to attract a lady, have some shit going on in your life.
	Don't need her.
	Accept her.
	She should be something that you're perfectly happy to include in your life, not something you need to live.
	Don't be desperate, dude.
	Have your own shit going on.
	And in the interim, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	Sweat, baby.
	Baby sex is a Texas drought.
	Me and you do that kind of stuff that only French would sing about.
	So put your hands down my pants, and I'll bet you'll feel nuts.
	Yes, I'm Joey.
	Yes, I'm Biden.
	And you're getting two thumbs up.
	You've had enough of two hand tugs.
	You want a rub?
	You're out of bounds.
	I want you smothered.
	I want you covered.
	Like my Waffle House has grounds.
	Coming quicker than FedEx.
	Never meet your paychecks.
	Just like Coca-Cola stock.
	You are declining.
	Make me rise in power.

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