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Jan. 22, 2023 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
01:19:02
GOML LIVE #179 - A MILLION A MONTH (part 1)

It appears to be Sylvia's last show as a slew of cops show up and turn the whole thing into pigs VS. perps.

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Time Text
Welcome to another episode of Jewem Alive.
That was Squeeze, Cool for Cats, wonderful band.
Blew up in the 70s.
Everyone thought they were going to be the new Beatles.
Heir to the Lennon and McCartney throne, they said.
And then nothing happened.
They faded away.
They were not the heir to any throne.
They pulled some muscles from a shell.
Was that them too?
Yeah, pulling muscles from a shell.
Oh, so they had two hits.
Are you sure, Ryan?
Yeah.
Black coffee in bed?
That one I think you're making up.
Maddie looks a little blurry.
He looks pretty sharp, but he looks 1% blurry.
You know, his arm is more in focus than his face, that's right.
We have a new guest tonight, John, boxing cop, Jim.
That's what he is in my phone.
So we have John the cop from the Bronx.
We'll get to see him soon.
Have faith, folks.
It's coming up.
And then we, of course, have Sylvia.
Sylvia doesn't seem thrilled about her chair.
Can we zoom in on the three of them?
Sure.
I don't like the shot there.
Yeah, that's better.
That's better.
Welcome, John.
John, you were a cop in the Bronx for how long?
20 years.
20 years.
Yeah, I guess everyone was a cop for 20 years, right?
Started in the Bronx, got promoted to the detector with Dynamo Manhattan, and I came back to the Bronx.
Why?
It was a transfer, so I took it closer to home.
They say that about American Indians.
They're the only group that returns to the Res.
Blacks get rich, they leave the hood forever.
Indians come back.
You came back to the Bronx.
It was my stomping ground.
It was good days back then.
But it was a violent hellhaul.
It was a war zone.
It was?
It was a war zone.
But I was there 86 to 2003.
Juliani was there.
So things were a lot different than it was today.
But a lot of your career was Dinkins.
Dinkins was there, but there was definitely when Dinkins was there, there was a lot of lawlessness.
They had the riots in Brooklyn and stuff.
And you liked it?
It was a lot of good times there.
We did have the support of everybody but the mayor.
Wow.
We were talking about housing cops because, Tim, you were a housing cop for a while.
Yes.
And I heard Keith the cop, the Anthony Coome guy, he goes, God, I miss being a housing cop.
He goes, it was like hunting people.
Well, housing cops, anytime a job would come over, I'd be like, where's housing?
They're never available.
Never available.
It's because there wasn't a lot of us.
We were elite.
I thought you were busy.
Time.
You're very busy.
Can you open some projects?
Throwing some jungle bunny.
Can you scooch closer to John, Tim?
Yeah, let's try not to.
No home owner.
Not a gay way, obviously.
And then, of course, we have our co-host, Maddie O'Dell.
What's going on, everybody?
Good to see you.
Good to be back.
Convicted felon, cop hater.
No, not a cop hater.
A man.
And lots of law enforcement in my family, believe it or not.
A man considering jumping to the other end of the room and just stabbing.
No.
Just stabbing.
I'm too old.
Too old to stab.
That's a t-shirt.
Huh?
That's a t-shirt.
Too old to stab.
Too old to stab.
It's funny, though, how cops and felons have so much in common.
And when I look at my texts from cops and felons, I see the exact same shit.
Almost indistinguishable.
Literally indistinguishable.
We kept saying we got to do a game show where you have to guess if it's a cop or a felon.
Yeah, we got to do that.
They love Trump.
They hate the trans shit.
And they also, my experience has been a lot of felons hate this sort of like getting released on bail with nothing when you stab someone.
Like, it's weird, but I think a lot of criminals like the law when it's fair.
Yeah, I always said, if you catch me, bingo, you got me.
But if you do something crooked or you plant something or you fabricate something, and it's like, now you just, you know, I know what you do for a living.
You know what I do for a living.
And if we, you know.
We're on the same page.
Yeah.
Like I said, if you got me, you got me.
The front page of the post said, we're not even trying and talked about how many people are released on bail.
I get mad when I see that because I just think of all my friends, Proud Boys who are in prison, and then I think of fucking Jan Sixers who were in jail.
And if everyone was getting released, I might be more open to it.
But it seems like certain demographics get released and certain political affiliations don't get released.
Selective prosecution.
Anyway, you know how the show goes.
We take calls.
We're raising money for Max and John in prison.
We're raising money for Joe Biggs, who's facing 25 years for meandering on January 6th.
We're free for as long as about an hour.
I usually forget and it goes two hours, but it should be a short amount of time.
And then we go behind the paywall.
We'll be taking calls.
Oh, shitballs.
I didn't really forget my computer.
It's in the car.
So I'll be getting my computer.
We'll be reading letters.
We've gone through them all, so it's only the cream of the crop.
But before we get to any of that, Beard Vet.
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Okay.
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They work in any Kerrig K-Cup machine.
I have personally seen Ryan Katsu-Rivera make a cup of coffee, probably for the first time ever, all by himself.
Even with his ridiculous hair in his eyes, he brewed these damn grunt cups with a plom.
That's how easy and convenient these beard vet grunt cups are to brew.
You're wearing a beard vet hat right now, right, Matt?
Yeah, no, I'm not.
Oh.
Yeah, I am.
Wait, what happened there with Brian?
I'm talking about me.
You thought you were wearing a beard vet hat?
I thought that you thought that I was wearing a beard vet hat.
No, you're wearing a green screen on your head.
Maddie, have you tried beard vet spice rubs?
Not yet.
So let's incorporate those into Maddie's shitty little kitchen.
I definitely will.
Ooh.
You could get money for that sponsorship because you asked me and, like a man, thought that would be a good idea.
Wright, on the other hand, started doing some celebrity mailbag live stream super chat where he's getting money.
Well, yes, I saw some other people taking advantage of that, and I think that that's cool, and that's how the world works these days.
You watch somebody stream.
And then here's the thing, too.
We have a chat on any live show, like right now.
Let's go check it out.
You'll see a chat.
But the problem is they're talking to Jungle Asian.
They're posting their Telegram chats.
So it's not something you could really interact with lest you just sit there and kind of read what's going on.
So in order to prioritize, in other words, we have 62 people and they're just kind of talking to each other.
But in order to kind of have a pipeline for them to talk to me so I can interact with them and read their stuff, that helps that.
That prioritizes that.
But you're asking for money at work.
It's like, do you have a Patreon?
Should you have a Patreon?
Should I?
I could do whatever I want.
Yeah, I could have a Patreon if I want.
Sure.
No, you can't.
I can't have a Patreon.
Well, I do.
Well, luckily you don't use it.
But this is bringing us to the Steven Crowder controversy, where they made it very clear to him that he can't have a Patreon and he can't have other fundraisers because they're employed by him.
But we'll get to that in a second.
But yeah, no, you can't be begging for money on the show.
I'm not begging.
You don't have to send it.
Don't send it.
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Maybe you even have beard dandruff.
Our ad guy, Sean, has a beard that goes down to his ankles.
What?
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That's the end of that.
I like that new little logo they got there posted up behind you.
The J Sixers.
Jay Sixers.
Yeah, it's taking the 76ers.
It was the Patriot.
That's a great logo.
1776.
Yeah, Nick Quested, we had him on the show.
That was the guy that I liked who followed Prowboys around for months, maybe a year before January 6th.
And then we were talking, I've had beers with the guy and everything.
And then we were talking after, I think this was on the phone.
And after January 6th, and he goes, yeah, well, I mean, no, that's it.
I saw him say that there was a lot of racists there.
So I called him.
I go, what did you just say on the news?
Racists?
And he goes, well, I mean, there was a lot of white guys there, you know, very angry white men.
Yes.
From the South.
Like, why do we allow British people in this country besides me?
It's not acceptable.
They're fucking retarded.
Large assumption.
A group of disproportionately southern men are mad and white.
Racism.
Ever been to a fucking NASCAR?
Ever been to a monster truck rally, you fucking shithead?
So we got to talk about this.
Steven Crowder, we talked about this yesterday before we knew all the deals of his term, but he was pissed off about a term sheet that he held up a bunch of times.
I called it a contract, and he was furious about this shitty deal he got from a mystery network.
Now, he left Blaze, so we knew the mystery network was Daily Wire.
What else is it going to be?
Who has that kind of money?
It's not going to be Newsmax or what's it called?
News Nation.
And it did sound terrible.
It was like, if you don't show up this month, you're busy, you lose a million dollars.
If you get banned from social media, you lose hundreds of thousands of dollars.
And we go, fuck them.
Fuck Daily Wire.
Those guys are dicks.
That's Ben Shapiro, right?
Yep.
Oh, I was wrong, by the way.
Yesterday I said Dan Bongino is part of Daily Wire.
In my car, New York Talk Radio does Ben Shapiro, Michael Knowles, Dan Bongino.
It's part of the same package.
I assume that means Daily Wire, but he's not.
He replaced Rush Limbaugh.
I'm not a big fan of his show.
The fucking commercials are relentless.
But then after we were finished shooting around 9 p.m. last night, The head of Daily Wire made a video and he explained how much he was offering.
Let's do some ballpark guesses.
Sylvia, how much do you think Steven Crowder was offered to do a show per month?
We can zoom in on them like crazy, right?
How much?
I don't know.
Half a mil.
A month?
Yeah.
Okay.
I'm surprised how close that was.
John Steven Crowder, successful conservative pundit.
Can you lean forward a little bit?
Talking to Michael and 250,000.
Okay.
And AI me.
Say $200,000.
$200,000.
I was in more of that ballpark with you guys.
I thought his deal would be like $3 million a year.
It's fucking $15 million a year.
Holy shit.
That's huge.
So now the fines.
No, wait a minute.
Sylvia was the closest.
I said $250,000.
She said $500,000.
He was getting, what, $1.5 million a month?
That's what he wanted.
He wanted about $1 million a month.
$65,000 an episode.
So when you hear about these fines, you're like, man, they're not so bad.
It's not so bad.
Dude, what are you thinking?
Someone offers you a million dollars a month?
The answer is yes.
I swear to God, if Media Matters said, Gavin, we're offering you a million dollars a month, but you got to shit on Trump and fucking proud boys and cops and the right, I'd try it.
I'd be like, so today that bastard Trump was up to his old tricks.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
I might make it a month, though.
But yeah, this dude, I don't know.
I don't think he's ever independently built a business.
He's incredibly successful.
Okay.
He's the Elvis of the right.
I'm not denying that.
He's from Canada.
Yep.
Montreal.
My alma mater.
I love the guy.
He doesn't like me, but I love the guy.
But when Anthony and I were just discussing this yesterday, we had no idea he was rejecting that kind of fucking money.
And then we find out that Blaze had offered him like, I don't know, 30 million or something.
No, Blaze didn't offer him that.
He demanded 30 million from Blaze over four years, I guess.
And then I might be getting these numbers wrong.
And then he got offered 50 million over four years.
So $13 million a year from Daily Wire.
What are you thinking?
What are you thinking?
Your other idea better be pretty good.
A million dollars a month.
Quarter of a million dollars a week.
Like with an athlete.
I read the Kansas City Chiefs have a cap at $13 million a year for their athletes.
When you hear $13 million a year, you go, okay, top athlete in the world.
You're in professional sports.
You're in the MLB.
You're in the NHL.
You're in the fucking NFL.
Not good enough?
So that million dollars a month, that's what they were starting at?
That was the starting point.
And then all the other stipulations, he'd get less if he was frank.
And so his thing is, what's with the framing on that shot?
It got worse again.
Yeah, there we go.
Yeah, the stipulation is if you, say you lose your Twitter, he's already lost his YouTube, but if you lose your Twitter, you get less money.
But their argument was, and you can find this video where the dude explains it.
It's way too long.
It's an hour.
The God King of Daily Wire.
Their deal is, if you get kicked off of social media, we can't advertise your show.
We lose money.
So don't fuck up.
Like, we need billboards to advertise your show.
If you put a swastika on a naked lady on a billboard and you get kicked off billboard rights, well, now we can't push the show.
So what do you think the worst case scenario for him?
Tons and tons of money.
Absolutely.
The fines were like 25 grand.
They were nothing.
So you get kicked off Twitter.
And I guarantee you he could have, this was just an offer.
So he could have said, I won't say the N-word on, there it is in the top left.
I won't say the N-word.
I won't say the Holocaust didn't happen.
But if I question the vaccine and I get shut down, I shouldn't be penalized for that.
And I'm sure God King here would say, okay, fine.
The fuck is he wearing, by the way?
A key.
He's got a broken, a bent key around his neck.
Lash key kid.
Some weird book no one likes.
And then a karate shirt.
This, I watched the whole thing.
You don't need to watch the whole thing.
Drop the needle anywhere in this thing and you get the point pretty quick.
Crowder came out with a new video as of like an hour ago.
Ooh.
And it sounds like he watched your video, you and Anthony talking about it.
He said he tried to provide an alternative source, just as you and Anthony said.
He'd be like, listen, I know the contract says this and that, but if you go in there with an alternate source for them to make money, they're going to listen to it.
And so he was like, yeah, I did that.
And maybe he did.
Who knows?
But this is brand new.
15 minutes long.
Daily Wire, you should probably know I'm available for a million dollars a month.
How much is a private jet?
A private plane to buy?
A couple million dollars.
Depending on what kind?
That's two months.
Everyone.
I think it's more than that.
Oh, absolutely.
I think it's like the Trump plane was $100 million, but like a cool little puddle jumper with like 15 seats.
A little doctor killer.
I don't want a jet.
I don't have that many friends.
I want like something with 15 seats.
Definitely not getting a G750.
No, I'm talking $7 million at least.
Okay.
And it's used, probably.
No problem.
That's seven months.
Nice.
Done.
Good way to look at it.
Then You got to maintain it.
Hop in, boys.
We're going to Puerto Vallarta for free.
Uh-oh, now I'm already thinking of the entourage, the hangers on.
I'm in that broadcast.
I'll be your friend then.
It's not you.
It's like your friend's friend.
What's he saying now?
He basically said he didn't do it.
It's not about the money for him.
He said he's doing it for all the people that come in and want to make something of themselves, and he doesn't want to pull the ladder in as he's getting on the boat or something, right?
So he's like, it's about these kids that don't know how to read contracts.
And it's basically enforcing YouTube's rights, basically.
Like YouTube's sensibilities.
Well, hey, Gav, he can do what you do.
And he probably knows how much money he can make on his own.
And he's just, he's comparing that to what they're offering.
Well, I think we both charge $10 a month.
Yeah, he has a crowd of money.
How many subs do you need to make a million?
$100,000?
I don't know.
Could you get that?
Don't do math in public, as Matty O'Dello says.
Never do math in public.
Well, $25,000 is $250,000.
$200,000?
Yep.
So you need $100,000.
But then you need sponsors, too.
No, you don't.
Everybody's paying for it.
Well, if you get the sponsors, that's where the money's at.
That's the other thing.
They said you need to do all these ad reads, and he's like, no, that's gay.
Okay.
He's a big 2A guy.
So I'm stunned.
But show me this new video.
Okay.
The one you just put up?
The only thing.
Oh, there's two playing here.
Hold on.
Demand was their word, and not even for me, but for other people coming up facing these kinds of things.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
And I'm sorry to disparage old Stevie, but this is like Celine Dion saying, I got to do this for all the other singers out there.
Like, you won the fucking lottery, dude.
We're not looking for tips.
There's not young YouTubers or conservative pundits going, I need Steven to fucking break the mold and pave the way.
Cash in your check, dude.
A million dollars a month.
Enjoy yourself.
Let's say it's a kid who comes in with 500,000 YouTube subscribers or something like that, 100,000.
Let's say it's some other kid, you're paying six figures to come in and do it.
there's not the penalty of the demonetization or if they're removed from iTunes.
Recording conversations and playing them kind of rows me the wrong way too, but I mean.
That's good.
But this, who's going to hire you now?
Apparently, he said that he didn't want to do this, but they got personal.
People at the Daily Wire and SpaceX.
I watched a whole hour video of this guy, and it's pedantic.
It's a tedious trope, a tedious trip through the contract.
Like he goes through every single fucking page, and you're like, no, I can tell it's a good deal.
Look, here's the advice I would like to give all young people.
There's things when you like your oasis and you know you have something amazing and you're young and you're like, you're not going to fuck me over.
If that's the case, do it yourself and go get rich.
Okay.
The other 99% is someone spots a talent in you, say yes, sign the contract, sign it all the way.
If you're so talented, then they can take all your shit and then you go make new shit because you're so incredibly talented.
When you get an offer like that, say yes.
I remember I had a fucking taco truck and we were making about 80 grand a year.
And that's a fine line between gross and net.
We got offered 80 grand for the taco truck and my buddy Curtis was like, no, I don't want to sell.
I can make 80 grand in one year.
And I'm like, yeah, but this is an offer.
And running a taco truck sucks.
So fucking take it.
And then if we're such great restaurateurs, then we'll start a new thing and make money with it.
But every time I watch Shark Tank, I'm just like, say yes.
Say yes.
Say yes.
And then I was like, what about 5% for another 100?
Shut the fuck up.
Say yes.
Get the ball moving.
Seal the deal.
Seal the fucking deal, boys.
So the deal's not sealed.
And you know what?
If I'm wrong, God bless Steven Crowder's cotton socks.
If he does a thing, a subscription thing, he sets up his own infrastructure, and he makes more than a million dollars a month, by all means, congratulations.
I said Crowder fucked up.
Oh yeah, McInnes, I'm fucking making $2 million a month.
Then I'm an idiot, and I'm sorry, and you rock.
I want to be wrong on this.
I would love to be wrong.
I'd love for him to fucking drive by in a gold car and give me the finger.
That would be cool.
But I'm not seeing it.
Jesus.
H. Trinito.
And here's something else.
I was also very measured.
I was painstakingly.
This is a man being offered a million dollars a month talking about how measured he is.
What?
Off the table because it wasn't going to be a right fit.
That happens in business all the time.
Thank you.
But that we weren't talking about me.
We were talking about the futures of other people who could potentially be in that position, that very disconcerting position.
Yeah, we've all been there.
We've all been offered a $50 million deal for four years.
And we don't know how to deal with it.
Finally, someone who's got the deal we've all received, a million dollars a month, and he's handling it.
There's communication.
I remember when I was offered a $10.
$50 million a month for four years, and I was like, I wish someone had paved the way and broken down the barriers.
So I wouldn't feel so confused and taken advantage of.
That's the worst part about being offered a million dollars a month.
You're like, I'm sick of being taken advantage of.
It's a fuck ton of money, folks.
I don't know if you know how money works.
Dude, $10,000 a month is insane.
That's a fucking great salary.
That's really good.
The average salary in America is $50,000.
Throw some zeros on the end of that, and you're doing real well.
No need to be a pioneer.
Take the money and run.
I don't think they would have made a profit on that offer.
Throwing some zeros at the end of it.
He did one better.
He turned them all into zeros.
Well, they had all the hand reach he had to do, so they were getting paid from the advertisers.
Dude, imagine you worked for Crowder right now, you'd be going...
You said no?
you You could have been paying me just like in jets.
I'd make four jets a week.
I feel like if you said, if you dropped an N-bomb on Daily Wire once, they'd fucking bury you alive and piss on you.
Why, is he known for that?
Wait, so you're taking Crowder's side?
No, I'm just saying it sounds like a hellish.
It would have to be a lot of money to work over there.
They're so established.
You know, they're safe.
They're too safe.
You know that.
No, no, no, no.
Just like Blaze.
Blaze is like, They're just too safe.
You had to bleep out shit when you worked with them.
Yeah, but...
Their thing was like, keep your shit behind the paywall.
So wait a minute.
Ryan's take is Crowder did the right thing.
No, it's not binary.
It's just saying, imagine working for Daily Wire, though.
It would kind of blow.
I listen to Daily Wire all the time.
Not for us, potty mouths.
If I was like a sweet girl with like conservative values, I'd be like, Daily Wire, it is.
I'd go there and, you know, we could never be at Daily Wire because we wouldn't be able to not swear.
I wonder what King Solomon is getting.
We're foul mouthed boys.
Yeah, I bet the other employees are like, you offered him what?
Yeah.
Yeah, that was really good.
How much?
I thought I was killing it at $180,000.
My name is God King.
I'm not getting paid that much.
Yeah, she was recently signed there.
Yeah, yeah.
Like it was a little edge.
It's 65 grand an episode.
So say you work there and you're really proud of yourself because you make 200 grand.
And you should be proud of yourself if you make 200 grand.
That's a ton of money.
But then you go, wait a minute, that's three Crowder episodes.
That's Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.
He just did my annual salary.
I'd be upset.
I'm upset.
I'm sorry.
People subscribe to Daily Wire?
Yeah.
And you get all that.
How much is the subscription?
And how many do they have?
I'm just going to say that.
I think it's the same as us.
I think it's $10 a month.
I'm not sure.
How much money do they bring in if they're offering that?
Must be huge.
A ton.
A ton And I suspect They'll give you a three-minute, what do you call it?
Segment or something?
And then you'll get two ads with it.
Right.
So they wanted all that revenue to make their money back, and that pissed him off.
Well, he was like, what if I get banned on Facebook?
Okay, well, don't get banned on Facebook.
I mean, it's hard to, he's kind of square, too.
Hold on a second.
Nice.
And that's why you'll never be on Daily Wire.
That's a lot, Tim.
I had to actually cinch that at the end because it was getting into the danger zone.
For every fart.
Was there a little water with that?
I could feel like people trying to escape.
I could feel like they were letting some convicts out of the prison and some other guys were like, oh, we're getting out.
And they were running towards the gate.
And I was like, no, not you.
Daily Wire is.
Only air is getting out.
Daily Wire is $16 a month for the lowest level.
What a bunch of...
That's the one.
Those are conservatives that are allowed to exist.
Are they bigger than Blaze?
Yes.
I'm not even going to look at that.
Yes.
Wow.
What do you think?
I mean, Shapiro.
I have no idea.
If you go on YouTube and you have a fresh account with no algorithms and you search like one conservative thing, you will not see as much Blaze stuff.
Glenn Beck has been doing this shit since he was 17.
That doesn't equate for a hoot.
I think Blaze might be bigger.
Anyway.
Okay, let's start taking some calls.
Michael knows.
We've got to get behind the paywall soon.
I have to run outside.
And by the way, if you're waiting outside the studio, you've finally figured out where in the South Bronx we are, and you want to kill me, this would be a perfect time to do an assassination.
I got to run out and get my computer, or as my daughter said when she was for my McPudy, so we can read some letters.
I think we're done with this topic of million dollars a month.
That might be a good name for this episode.
Million dollars a month.
And then we'll take calls and then we'll put up the super chats.
The net worth of Blaze is...
The net worth of Blaze is $239,000 a year.
Wait.
Or?
Wait, wait, that's what this says.
How old is it?
$230 million.
$239 million.
Yeah.
Blaze net worth.
Is that real?
This is what they make.
Oh, okay.
It says Daily Wire is a $100 million a year business, though.
Okay.
But how much does Blaze make?
The Blaze.
It's definitely in the several...
All right.
Anyway.
Why don't you do the thanks for calling?
Put up the number.
And I don't know, cut to yourself or Tim Dickman and John and Sylvia while I go and get my briefcase.
You are on the air.
This is a fucking loser.
You don't want me to learn, share.
Listen, you'll understand why.
Hey, why does everyone get two things?
You have one thing.
Thank you for calling.
It's great hearing from you.
Bye-bye.
All right, next call.
Home to mommy.
Hey, what's going on there, Pete?
Reminder: catch Maddie's little kitchen next Wednesday.
Wait till people see what you do.
Skirt steak and chimichurry sauce.
That's true.
Turned out rather well, I must say.
It's fantastic.
It's quick.
It's fantabulous.
And it's delicious.
It was very good.
Skirt steak and what?
Chimicherry.
And there's a couple of alterations to MSLK.
Oh, yeah.
So that's a teaser.
Let them wonder.
What's MSLK?
Mighty Shit Little Kitchen.
Oh, right.
Can we see the cops and Sylvia again?
The lighting is harsh.
It looks terrible.
There's three gorgeous people.
Send makeup over here again.
Wardrobe.
Makeup on Sylvia, please.
Oh, they don't need makeup.
Did you ever shoot anyone, John?
No.
Did you ever get in a shootout?
Ah, yes, that's been known to happen, yes.
Well, I didn't fire my gun, though.
You were in a shootout and you didn't fire your gun?
I actually went to, it's a long story.
I went to a, got a call of a, it's a long story.
At that time, worked with a female in the Bronx, Creston Avenue, right where she lived.
This was Trish DeDish.
She was a great cop.
And it was an EDP, 7.30 in the morning.
I was like, holy shit.
Emotionally this third person.
Mostly this third person.
It's fucking freezing out.
It snowed the night before.
We didn't even have breakfast yet.
We're driving out to the place.
There's another, what do you call it, cop, another female cop walking.
I said, let's pick her up.
And we drove over there.
And we walk up into the building.
It's like a fucking five-story walkup.
And all of a sudden, this fucking raving lunatic comes running out with a t-shirt on.
And it's freezing out.
I said, Trish, that's the fucking guy.
We got a call that he's trying to stab the mother and everything.
And we're going to the door.
And I yelled to the other female cop.
I said, listen, stop that fucking guy.
And she went to grab him.
And the fucking guy laid her right out.
Fucking knocked her out, broke her fucking nose right then and there.
We went down, we started fighting.
And, you know, the more you hit him, the more crazier he got.
And eventually, we're running around in the street and I started macing him.
And as I'm macing him, he's fucking swallowing it.
He's chewing it.
I'm like, this fucking guy's nuts.
And we start fighting again.
And I told you earlier, the garbage went out that day.
And this is the Bronx.
This is right by Crescent Ford.
There's garbage everywhere.
Right by St. James Park?
No, no.
Creston is the other side.
But it's near St. James.
It's walking distance.
So when you push the garbage up, all the garbage cans and everything was on that.
And there was a joint compound bucket.
And he picked it up over his head.
And that's when I pulled my gun.
I said, don't you fucking throw that at me.
And what does he do?
Throws it at you.
He throws it at me.
Fucking hits me.
And he fucking charged me.
He was smart, though.
He hit and charged me and started pulling at my gun.
And my partner, Trish, fucking shot him.
Dead?
No, not dead.
Fuck, I got a hold of my gun.
He shot.
He's still running around.
Finally, we're getting into fights and we're still fighting.
And he runs up the block and all his shirts turning red.
I said, listen, dude, you're fucking shot.
And then he looked down, he seen that, and he fucking dropped, and he died.
Was he on PCP?
He did die.
He did die.
But you know what's funny?
IED came out, the shooting team came out, and you always hear nothing but bad things about internal affairs.
And they actually went up to the roof and found homeless people.
There's elevator shafts in certain roofs.
And they heard the commotion.
And, you know, who likes, you know, it's early in the morning, they got nothing to do.
They come down there watching.
And they actually verified everything that we did.
Oh, cool.
There was a little body camera.
It was the same day that five Hasidic Jews were coming across the Brooklyn Bridge.
And they shot up those Hasidic Jews, an Arab.
I don't know if you remember that.
This was like 94, 95.
I forget the date.
And they wound up shooting up these Jewish people coming across the Brooklyn Bridge by the FDR.
And that dominated the newspapers the next couple of days.
So we only got a small article in it because the media has a lot to do with it.
But we wound up going to, they took my jacket, they verified like there was chemicals on my jacket, chemicals on his jacket, went down to the district.
I had to, you know, jump through all the hoops that, although I didn't do the shooting, my partner at that time, she was covered under the 48-hour rule where you do not have to say anything to the district attorney or the captains or anything.
But of course, I had to tell the story.
So I remember going into this small office in the 4-6 Freesin.
All these bosses are there.
All the white shirts.
Everybody's, they look like all the chiefs and everything.
And I was able to get in there.
And make a long story short, I'm the guy in the center, and they start shooting questions at me.
But it went down to the grand jury.
So wait, were you interrogated more because you're a man?
No, no, no, no.
I was interrogated more because my partner, because back then, if you were involved in a fatal shooting, you did not have to speak to the district attorney or anybody.
There was like a 48-hour rule.
Oh.
So they could get what the PBA law is.
I did have a PBA representative, but it was a justified shooting.
Were you under that rule?
Or because you didn't do the shooting, you had to speak?
Because I didn't do the shooting.
You had to speak.
I had to speak.
Oh.
Or they would have suspended me.
Okay.
I thought that rule was good for all cops.
No, no.
Just because you're involved in the shooting, once you peg around and you hit somebody, you're cup underneath that.
But I wound up, we went to the grand jury, we were fully exonerated.
So that was a rough time.
But, you know, I never shot anybody, but that girl, Trish, you never know.
If that guy could have got my gun, I could have been not here today.
How do you feel about female cops?
It's hit and miss.
It's like guys.
It's like guys.
There's some cops out there.
The female warriors, there's some.
The hit and miss ratio is a little different, though.
Six foot tall.
This is the cop.
I'll be honest with you.
I worked with a lot of female cops, and a lot of them were great, rugged cops.
They were smart.
What percentage?
Small percentage.
Until it gets physical.
They can't fight men.
I think that's your point.
No.
Well, that's a big fucking deal.
You're right.
Cops are fighters.
I'd like to say the same thing because I know so many great female cops that I don't want to say anything bad about, but yeah, when it comes to getting physical and shootout, there's, well, I mean, in his story, she shot a guy, but there's not a lot of adrenaline control sometimes.
It kind of there's that.
Also, you're not taking down a regular Joe.
This is not sparring at the ring, which, by the way, John and I did yesterday, and he broke my neck.
Well, you always go with that overhand left.
That's all I got.
That's good.
But you know something?
You keep nailing me with that.
And, you know, Coach Barnes is always saying, keep your hand up, keep your hand up.
But it gets heavy after a while.
Secretary fighting is to fight guys with heavy arms.
He's doing the Ali Foreman fight, but with your arms.
Their arms are too heavy to hold.
Just tire his arm out.
So you're fighting a dude who is like, I don't want to go to jail.
And I'm on PCP.
Do you want to know something?
And I just killed someone.
My adrenaline is coursing through my veins.
I'm Superman.
The family was with us.
He had gone and tried to kill his sister and his mother.
They were in the bathroom holding the door and he was stabbing through the bathroom door.
Oh, geez.
Oh, my God.
And they were like calling 911 at that time.
But of course, about a month later, when the lawsuits came, they were like, oh, my poor son, my loving brother.
You can't have to do that.
But when they initially were interviewed, from what I understood, they basically stood up for us for what we'd done.
He was definitely nuts.
I'm glad you brought up what you, the family saying you shouldn't have done that because Biden was recently talking about police brutality and how dangerous cops are.
And he said, we have to retrain cops as to why should you always use shoot for that with deadly force?
The fact is, if you need to use your weapon, you don't have to do that.
That's verbatim.
Now I'll read it in a normal voice so you can hear how insane it is.
We have to retrain cops as to why.
What?
As to why.
That's not how English works.
We have to retrain cops as to why.
And then he goes like, why should you always shoot for that with deadly force?
Shoot for that.
Like he drips into Shakespeare sometimes.
Fact is, if you need to use your weapon, you don't have to do that.
So I'll translate for you because not everyone speaks Biden.
He means shoot him in the kneecap.
Shoot off his earlobe.
So you're trained to shoot center mass.
Well, he's saying don't do that anymore.
That's done.
It's hard enough to hit center mass.
Yes, sometimes he's not.
And now he wants us to wing them.
But, you know, now at least everybody has a taser so you could taser them, but that doesn't all exist.
Tasers suck.
In the wintertime, when everybody in the hood is wearing fucking three, four jackets.
It's not going to work.
And even the whole like shooting in the leg, you're not hitting his femoral artery.
Like, he's going to get up.
He's going to fuck you up.
Absolutely.
People are not...
You shoot some fucking six foot eight maniac who's on drugs in the calf.
He doesn't even feel it.
What about you, Maddie?
Have you ever been chased or arrested by a female cop?
I don't think so.
They're all male.
Not FBI.
No, uniform.
No, uniform cop.
Like, it was always, I've had female state troopers and stuff stop me and female officers when I lived in Earth.
Like, of course I came across them.
But if you're thinking of running or even fighting a cop and you see it's a woman who looks like Sylvia, you're going to be like, I'm going to go for this.
Or even just run.
Yeah, I mean, if they already know who you are, there's no point in it.
See, nowadays, it's great to be a cop because you don't have to do anything.
Years ago, when I was in narcotics, we had quotas.
If they were going to give us overtime, hey, you better bring some bodies in that van.
You know, we used to lock up people for smoking Refer.
Was that TV?
That's a misdemeanor.
I was in, yeah, Bronx narcotics.
You're smoking a joint.
Hey, hopefully you'll pass it to somebody else.
We're taking both of you.
And we got a number.
It was four hours of body.
At one time, it was five hours, five hours overtime of body.
That's the truth.
So if you get five bodies times four, you got 20 hours of overtime to whack up amongst your troops.
Nice.
With the paperwork, bring them down to central booking.
And that time, now the cops don't have to do anything.
With all the riots going on, they had plenty of overtime.
You took them down to Central Books or was Bronx House still open?
Bronx Central Booking, 161st.
We used to bring them down there.
You used to be by the motel over there.
The academic?
No, it was by the Grand Concourse.
Okay.
161st and Grand Concourse.
That hotel you're thinking about.
That's the 4-4 Priestin over there.
Oh, Right off the Deegan?
Yeah.
Okay, okay.
That's now actually that place that you're talking off the Deegan.
That used to be Bronx Task Force.
Okay.
Now they call it CRT.
They're a response unit now.
The old Bronx Task Force with his rights.
That's where they come out of.
Oh, okay.
It's more dangerous now to be a cop.
My granddaughter went to college to be one.
Anyway, I called up because I was going to try to scrape together money if she became a cop for body armor.
Well, when I called up, the police told me every cop in New York wears body armor that they provided.
So if that's the case, I think it's worse to be policed nowadays.
There's no respect for them, okay?
No fear of them.
And the criminals are more dangerous.
You guys have to wear body armor.
Yeah, everybody, we had a vest.
There's a lot of old timers when I got on, I'm sure when you got on, they wouldn't wear a vest.
They were just uncomfortable with it.
But what you're saying, Sylvia, I understand what you're saying.
But now when you think about it, if there's five guys hanging out by Valdega, we used to roll up there and we used to toss them.
Hey, what are you doing here?
We'd toss them.
See if they got anything on him.
Stop questioning Frisk.
Now, if you see five guys or ten guys hanging out in front of a bodega, you just keep going.
And you wait till somebody fires a shot, and you come back and say, oh, you guys.
It was you.
Have you ever been arrested, Sylvia?
No.
You got up to some naughty stuff over the years.
You never got caught?
No.
Okay.
Which is pretty slick.
This is a crime intervention.
Cuffer.
Well, yeah, it's sort of like this is your life, but it's cops who are here to arrest you.
You did this crime in 1975.
All right, let's put up the number to call in.
Feel free to call in with questions for Maddie O'Dell, John the Cop, Dick Mann, and Sylvia.
The number's 718-400-6959.
If you're just listening.
Grab me a bug.
And Gab, if you could turn on your mic.
That would be great.
Frankly, it would be great, right?
Thanks.
Turn that on.
And we got our first caller, 206.
And I'll take a shot, too.
All right, let's do some shots.
Maddie's cousin got some fancy maker's mark.
Might as well get him a bug, too.
Oh, hold on.
fancy maker's mark that is like 100 proof, so we've been sipping off of that, which is why our grammar is not amazing.
Go ahead, caller.
Okay.
One second.
Yes, 206.
Hey, man.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello, hello.
Hello, hello.
you hear me maddie if there's a gatorade there should be gatorade in the cases under the Can you hear me, buddy?
Buddy, our system is...
Hello, Gavin.
Hello, can you hear me?
Hey, I can hear you.
Uru.
Uru.
Hey, Gavin, I got a question for you as well as the rest of the gang.
It's a hypothetical.
So, pegging, right?
Thanks, man.
So say you're in a loving marriage, right?
Long marriage.
Your wife tells you that she's going to leave you unless you let her peg you.
Do you do it?
I'd do it absolutely.
I might get into it.
I don't know.
Now, here's the problem.
What if her taste is that pegging is the majority of the intercourse?
That's when you're like, I was willing to give it a whirl on New Year's Eve, but now you want to fuck me up the ass every Wednesday?
Hold on, I'm coming.
I don't know.
I would definitely try it.
But yeah, if you tried it and you don't like it, then it's bad news if she wants it to be regular that wants it to be a regular thing.
And if you tried it and you did like it, you're a fag.
Sorry.
So you would let pegging save your marriage?
Yes, a certain number of times.
If my wife was really, really into pegging, I would let her peg me once a year.
New Year's Eve.
He's so move.
We don't know what he's planning.
All right.
Well, thanks for calling.
Thanks for calling.
You turn around and walk away.
Yes.
Here's a letter we got.
Hey guys, can we please get a Joe Tonelli update?
It's been too long since we've heard about his untruthful exploits.
Also, please, please bring Linda back to the live show.
Linda's never coming back.
I don't know why.
I begged her on my hands and knees.
So Joe Tonelli is a compulsive liar who was at our local that we go to after the show.
What are you guys on your fucking phones?
Caught you.
I thought police obey the laws.
You guys are in big trouble.
Who's on your phone?
Joe Tonelli is an absolute imbecile, compulsive liar.
He used to be at our local.
He was a bartender there.
He got a $100 tip on Memorial Day for saying he's a Marine.
He's not a Marine.
He said he went to high school in Scotland.
Maddie goes, Maddie, both our parents are from Scotland.
His mother grew up like an hour.
Four miles.
Four miles from my mother.
And Maddie goes, hey, so you grew up in Scotland.
What are some, you know, they got a very thick culture there, a lot of vernacular.
What are some of the terms you heard growing up in Glasgow in high school?
He's like, well, I don't know.
Like, what about Akai the New?
Or it's got a pink coat?
Or is your jumper deer?
Yeah.
Spots and jumpers on it.
Is it related to a Congressman Sotos?
Santos?
Yeah, yeah.
So then my favorite part of Joe Tonelli is he goes, actually, I got some good news.
I've been talking to a therapist who's going to help me with my compulsive line.
And was it you who said, Boy, me and Jose.
Yeah, you and Jose are like, Wait a minute, you're here at 11 a.m.
And don't leave until 11 midnight.
Don't leave till 11 p.m.
Does this therapist do night shifts?
You're fucking lying about a therapist to help you with your compulsive lying, you fucking liar.
It's terrible.
So the last I heard of him, he got a new job and he started saying he was a Marine again.
And I think the owner of the bar was a Marine.
Fired him.
Was that Duns?
No, that was something Italian steakhouse or something.
There he is.
So the owner was like, I'm going to say this.
You know how Marines are about being Marines.
So the owner was like, I'm going to say this once, but don't fucking say you're a Marine ever again.
Or you're toast.
He's like, I got it.
What?
Seriously?
Seriously?
Okay, I got it.
And then a day later, yeah, I was in the shit in Afghanistan.
You know, that's us Marines.
So he was sent away.
But then he not inherited.
He got money from a car accident.
And he got money.
He's on disability from his neck.
So he got a four-year back pay.
For that, didn't he get 80 grand?
Yeah, but then he got like another 36 or 40 grand from disability.
What is he, Stephen Crowder?
So now he moved out of that little closet.
He lived in that old lady's house.
He lived in a woman's house, yeah.
In like the attic.
So he moved out of there.
He's got a new girlfriend.
From what I hear, he sits in the bar up there in White Plains and spends between $200 to $300 a day.
Moved into a new apartment.
He's probably going to be a little bit more than a hundred.50 cents left.
This is what's going to happen with reparations, by the way.
It's not going to be a lot of college funds.
And I heard he's been lending out money.
Oh.
Remember when he just sent an email about $6 million that has to be sent to him?
I got to give him a good update.
Oh, good.
Everybody in the town I live in and where he went to high school have there's someone put this on YouTube.
Oh, this?
Yeah.
And they're playing it in all the bars.
Really?
Seriously?
Yeah.
Yeah.
From like Kelly's and from in Rye and all that to everywhere.
I was in the station the other day and everyone's like, what's going on?
What are you guys doing, Joe Tonelli?
I was like, oh, God.
They're like, we've seen some videos.
Really?
Yeah, really?
I think he blocked my number.
I tried to call him.
Me and Jose were going to go find him today.
What a moment.
Just to break his balls.
What a meathead.
I might go do that tomorrow.
That's gold.
Remember when he pretended he worked at FedEx and he went on eBay and bought a bunch of FedEx clothes?
Yeah.
And then we go, take a picture of you at work.
We might believe you.
So he takes a picture of himself at like a FedEx place, but he's in front of the counter.
Yeah, he actually went to the lengths of buying like a FedEx shirt.
And they're not cheap.
They're like terrible $40.
Because I went to the FedEx where he said he was working in Elmsford.
I was like, is the guy Joe Tennelly working?
They're like, who?
There's like new new hire here.
Yeah, we criticized him, of course, but hanging out at the bar, it was like 50% of our conversations.
Joe Tennelly's latest lies, how implausible they are, why they don't make sense, why Arnold Schwarzenegger doesn't have a dojo.
There's no way he could have invited you there.
Well, he was in eight dudes in county jail, eight black dudes.
But the best was when he was a trauma flight nurse.
Yes.
Landing helicopters on the highway.
You're a liar.
He was trying to think, he was telling these guys this story.
Like he was in combat.
Like the helicopter swooped down and he jumped out of the helicopter.
And as he's running back to the helicopter with this kid that's been in this devastated car, I go, Joe, that's not how it's not how it goes.
He's watching too much man.
So then, he goes, the best part, not even the best part yet.
As he's running up to the chopper, he's handing off the child, a drunk driver hits him and the helicopter.
It's like an episode of Chips.
Oh, God.
So I go, Joe, first of all, when they call in life flight on the highway, they shut everything down.
I'm like, there's an ambulance on scene that's treating the patient already who says that it says, we need life flight.
They roll up there with the gurney.
And then I'm like, you're not running around.
Don't just land helicopters on a highway.
Sometimes the complaints will be false.
Yeah.
It's like, it doesn't work that way, Joe.
My buddy landed helicopter.
They are retarded.
One time, I swear to God.
He landed helicopters on a highway.
But were cars zipping by?
No, they were all, we hit a pursuit.
I swear to God, the whole time you guys are saying this, I'm thinking about this.
Pursuit starts in Middletown, goes south on 17.
Hit the Woodbury Tolls, south on the New York State Thruway.
So, I don't know, maybe 10 miles south of the New York State Thruway.
So it's got to be like by the Palisades.
Not quite that far.
Okay.
Orangeville.
Floatsburg, yeah.
Yep.
Floatsburgh, yeah.
Exit 15.
Right.
We finally get the guy stopped.
Aviation was put up because of the pursuit.
Jim Torhan was the pilot.
He literally, because traffic was already stopped, because we stopped him right in the middle of the highway, we pulled the guy out of the car, and I look, and Jim's standing there with all his flight gear on his helmet, and he's tuning the guy up with us.
Sport a guy.
But for him to land on that highway with that helicopter, there's no cars allowed.
No, no, no.
Everybody was stopped.
Traffic was completely stopped.
I love that terminology, tune up.
I worked with actually, I actually grew up with him.
We went to St. Phillips in the Bronx.
I worked with Bernie Ferrale.
He was called the mechanic in the 4-6 precinct.
And he went at the Mowing Commission.
They called him the mechanic because he used to tune people up.
Damn!
Great guy growing up.
You were at Fort Apache, the Bronx, weren't you?
Fort Apache is in the South Bronx.
I was in the 4-6.
The 4-6 was a lot busier in the 80s and the 90s because everything in the South Bronx burned down.
The 4-6, it was.
Well, that's considered South Bronx, though.
Yeah, because that falls under PSA 7.
Yes, right?
How far did it go down in the Concourse?
About 185.
It started at Fordham Road and went down to 175 in the Concourse.
Oh, so you had 188.
From the river to Webster and then the 4-4 precinct.
The Yankee Stadium precinct took over then.
All right, we should get behind the paywall soon.
Let's talk about Nita Fashions before we do.
Nita Fashions, I think they've left London now.
Nita Fashions is for cheap rich guys where you go there and get a custom suit for basically nothing.
Shirts, everything you need.
They are, what are we, 4th February?
Oh yeah.
So they're in London right now at the Intercontinental London Park Lane from the 31st.
Oh, sorry, not right now.
They're starting from the 31st of January to the 4th of February.
You go in there, you get all souped up.
They measure your neck, your inseam.
It's a male version of a spa.
And then they have your blueprint.
It's like Prince.
I heard Prince had like a room where all these seamstresses were making outfits for him because they had his bust.
So he'd come down and put on a little purple pantsuit.
Is there a lot of seam in there?
So it's the same.
You have your own Prince room.
Once these guys make your measurements, they live in Hong Kong.
They send you swatches.
But when you go to these particular things, they show you the swatches, show you the shirts, and you get custom suits.
A suit could be as cheap as $800.
A shirt could be as cheap as $50.
At the other end of the spectrum, you could do like a $2,000 suit, $100 shirt.
But here in America, if you have a custom suit made, you're looking at five grand.
It's just untenable.
And it's no fun.
But these suits are so comfortable, so perfect.
It's like you're wearing pajamas.
You go to the wedding, you're the only guy that's not uncomfortable.
You go to a funeral, and we all love funerals.
You're the only guy not suffering.
You go to a job interview, you're just better off.
You're more you because you're more relaxed.
It literally feels like pajamas.
I'm not exaggerating, and I hate the word literally.
So what you do is you contact these guys on their Instagram.
That seems to be the best way to contact them.
You DM them and ideally you can set up a meeting when they're in your town.
And when I say your town, they're in Glasgow, London, Toronto, New York, Singapore.
Like they toured the world doing these measurements and showing swatches.
And then they go back to Hong Kong and make the suits.
You see me wearing suits on this show 90% of the time and all of my suits are Nita Fashions.
A couple Ted Baker blazers, but mostly Nita Fashions.
So set up an appointment with them.
You can do it online too.
You can do a FaceTime thing or whatever is a Zoom call and they'll measure you there.
Your wife sort of holds the tape measure around your neck and considers strangling you.
And then you get your blueprint there.
I love it in person.
It's a lot more fun in person.
Oh, there's me hanging out with these dudes.
So the reason I look so incredibly gorgeous on this show all the time is because of Nita Fashions.
Gavin McGinnis.
Check them out.
Tell you, the suit you were wearing Tuesday was pretty sharp.
That what?
The black suit you wear on Tuesday?
The Jesse James one?
Oh.
I started look like a preacher, like a priest kind of outfit?
No, no, no, no, the blue skin.
That was actually blue.
Dark blue?
Sometimes the colors don't convey here with very dark blue and black.
Yeah, that's pretty sharp.
That's neat of fashion.
You know, it comes in handy, too, especially with the colors, they have these cool swatch stickers.
And you can kind of like carry them around and put them on, you could put it against your thing.
So like, what would the tie look like with this?
And you have this awesome, I kind of put it on my arm.
And I have like a just on my arm, like an awesome swatch sticker.
And I like to cover my room too, just a room full of swatch stickers.
And they're really convenient.
Yet again, you could match and kind of party with them.
And these different swatches, you can even make a flag if you want.
And you could just be marching around proud of this print that you have.
You could work on them with some designs.
Yeah, the suit he's wearing Tuesday.
Right.
And then you have this awesome flag that you're just marching around with with a huge swatch sticker on it.
And it's a lot of fun for the whole family, too.
You can get kids' suits, women's suits.
They make like pants suits for women.
But yeah, these swatch stickers.
Very cool, very powerful, strong invention that they came up with there.
By the way, Maddie.
Yes.
You survived.
Just a teaser now.
You sent me a picture.
You had a health crisis in the upcoming Maddie Should Be Life.
Well, whatever that last night I ate when we left the supermarket almost killed me.
Anaphylactic shock.
Yeah.
Thank God for Benadryl.
That was fucking crazy.
So we thought Maddie was going to die.
Did you just do a swastika joke during an ad read?
No, right after.
No, I think the company was still up.
Swatch sticker, I said.
Yeah.
Who's on first?
Okay, so we apologize, City of Fashions, for an inappropriate Nazi joke during a fucking ad read, but please go to them.
All right, let's, are the super chats up or have they been shut down?
I think they're back.
We'll check up on those.
They must be there.
I know my accountant was getting nervous that we're giving money to Jan Sixers, but we did the research.
As long as when you get charity, if you spend it all on the guy, you're good.
Hey, policeman John, call white men whiskey mics.
What would you call it?
Cops call white men whiskey mics.
What would you call Ryan?
Oh, I see.
I never heard a whiskey mic before.
What do you call it?
Phonetic alphabet, I think they're saying.
White man?
I would say white male.
Oh, okay.
That's not a New York phonetic alpha.
That's a military phonetic alphabet.
Yeah, it's not when a...
Is M Mike?
M is Mike, I guess, huh?
Yeah.
Did you just ask if the word Mike starts with M?
No, no, I asked if that was the phonetical alphabet.
Mary, Mary is acting for the police department.
Right.
Oh, so he goes, Sector Mary, where you at?
Sector is a police car.
Because when you get a precinct, think of it as a pizzeria, a slice of, you know, a pizza pie.
You cut it into slices, and you'd have sector Adam, boy, Charlie, David.
And then certain areas where you got a lot of area to cover, you might be Ida John.
And whatever 911 calls come in, we'll go, hey, Sector 46 Charlie, you have a job here.
Are there cool names for different races?
No.
Promise.
Well, I will tell you, you know, this is my first time meeting him.
And again, we had a case, I was telling you earlier, we went all the way up upstate New York.
And we're doing a narcotics case out of Washington Heights.
They're selling, of course, all the heroin's coming from Queens.
It goes to Washington Heights.
It goes all the way upstate.
And we didn't know where we were driving around up there.
It was all the way up there.
And we didn't have a clue.
So they partnered up with another state trooper.
So I'm with this other state trooper.
He says, all the Canadians live over here.
Yeah.
I know.
I was like, fucking Canadians.
We're fucking 20 miles from the border.
What are you doing down here?
Then they didn't realize what Canadians stood for.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Well, in parts of Westchester, it means Jew.
In Austin, it means black.
And here it means black.
It means like the thing you're not supposed to say.
But if you're in an area where there's no blacks, then like wasps will call Jews Canadians.
It's the bad word.
And it hurts me as a Canadian because it means no one's talking about us.
So if someone talks about us, people go, well, it can't be Canadians because no one talks about them.
The Jersey State Troopers, they used to call all the New Yorkers going down to the New Jersey show all the Bennys.
I pulled over a couple of Bennys.
I gave them a ticket.
Why Bennys?
That was their slang.
I don't understand that.
We used to call them Mondays sometimes.
What does Mondays mean?
Everybody hates them.
Isn't it true that?
There you go.
Isn't it true you used to call cops, like upstate cops cupcakes?
Cupcakes.
Well, they live in East Cupcake.
He lives in East Cupcake.
I heard that from Larry Barnes.
He says that all the time.
Coach Barnes, you cupcake.
Well, some of the people that Larry Barnes calls cupcakes are actually really good people and have been misunderstood.
So far, it's been one for one.
No, I think the word has been bastardized.
And I think if you'd look into a lot of people that he calls cupcakes, you'd realize that they're actually pretty tough.
Pretty tough.
You get all these people from East Cupcake Long Island.
They're coming on the NYPD.
They've never been on a train before.
And now they're transit cops.
And they're like, what the fuck?
This thing's fast.
Yeah.
All right.
Let's get no money pays away to get on.
Let's get behind the paywall, but let's do some live chats, super chats before we do.
Raising money for Max and John who fought Antifa.
We got one.
These are on all of them here.
So here's the bottom.
Here's the most recent is in the bottom.
The one right after that is from last week.
So we are completely careful.
I don't care about $5 ones.
We already showed it.
I'd be really curious to see how that offer compares to Matt Walsh's current contract.
Yeah, me too.
I bet Matt is still under contract they gave him when he moved to Nashville.
He used to film his podcast for DW in his car.
And he exploded this year.
Yeah, he did a groundbreaking movie, What is a Woman?
So I bet his current contract is way behind.
I bet the most Matt Walsh's contract could possibly be is a million dollars a year.
So he must see fucking Crowder get offered 13 as a first offer, by the way.
That means that's your base.
Well, what does Crowder have as a base on YouTube?
He can't monetize YouTube.
No, but he's bringing a fan base.
A huge fan base.
For like 10 years, yeah, to be fair.
Yeah, massive fan base.
But all the eggs are in that basket.
Yeah.
Right, if they do pay to go over.
You're banking on that.
And I've heard that like the people who watch you for free, 7% of them are willing to pay.
Huh.
That's one of the numbers.
Fight me.
Ryan Gavin, you are too old and gay.
I'm 32 and had my first boxing match a couple months ago.
I see Ryan is starting to spar.
Since we are close in age and experience, he should fight me.
I'm 0-1.
So Ryan shouldn't be too scared.
Don't be a pussy.
Accept my challenge.
I'll fly out to you.
I'll buy five one-year-long subscriptions.
Blah, blah, blah.
If you win, you will advertise for me on five episodes.
What?
What does that mean?
We could discuss the product to be determined.
I can fight you between the months of April and June.
What's your weight?
That's all I want to know.
What if it's some fucking beast?
What if it's a little guy?
I need at least two months to get in shape.
You know what I saw recently?
I saw Andrew Tate fighting some male feminist who decided he wanted to kick his ass.
And don't challenge professional.
I'm not saying Ryan is a professional fighter, but don't challenge professional fighters to fights.
How many times have we seen this happen?
Andrew Tate was a four-time world champ.
Yeah.
They're like, I was a street fighter.
I've been to jail.
I want to fight the owner of this gym.
The guy's like, okay.
I got a good video of me and you sparring, actually, the one that Doc videotaped us.
Well, if I'm not losing, I'd love to show it.
And if I am losing, please delete it.
It's 50-50.
Oh, good.
When was that?
Was that when I was doing a lot of the low Larry Barnesian things?
A lot of times when coach tells us to get into the ring, Ryan will cause her to say, hey, don't hit me.
Just, you know, pretend.
Wait, what?
Oh, really?
No.
I'm just.
Oh, okay.
I was like, dude, what?
That'd be crazy.
I just sent you the Andrew Tate thing, though.
Oh, I?
The guy goes to some dude's gym and says, I want to fight Andrew Tate because he's sexist.
What?
Oh, Jesus.
What are you thinking?
How do you fight a woman and prove that they're equal?
Yeah, that would be better.
No, that's boring.
Is that what I sent you?
This is the last thing that you just sent me.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
I didn't mean to send you that.
He's okay.
Gay's raping kids.
He's recognizing that.
I'm really uncomfortable.
You want to take one call while we do that?
Yes.
We have 615.
You're on the live.
Go ahead, 615.
Hey, what's going on, y'all?
What's hey, man?
What's up, bro?
Hey, so as far as your tour for this year, I was wondering what...
I don't know offhand, but red cities, like Coeur d'Alene, would be a good one.
Fucking Denver or near Denver.
Fucking basically all of Florida.
Nashville.
Nashville?
Nashville would be good.
Nashville's kind of woke, though.
Yeah.
From what I hear, at least.
Yeah, you're right.
It's getting woker, but there's a lot of venues, though.
Yeah, I was just there.
I got these incredible jeans there.
Nice.
They're the best pants I've ever had.
Do you live in Nashville?
I do.
Have you ever been to see the name?
Amo Jean and Willie?
No.
I've never heard of that.
Yeah, it's fucking quality.
Pretty expensive, but the jeans.
Wait, wait, is it like on Broadway and shit?
Maybe, yeah, that sounds right.
Main strip?
Was it on the main?
Well, they got a bunch of main strips.
Nashville, I took pictures from the plane.
It goes on for a hundred years.
Yeah, but they got the one main drag with all the country boys.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It's not on that main drag.
No, no.
You said it's quality?
Well, can't be more quality than this.
Finally, a good joke from Ryan.
Jesus Christ spinning.
How it?
An hour.
I understand swatch stickers aren't the chillest thing to joke about, but swatch sticker, that's very good.
Yeah.
What do you think?
All right, thanks for calling.
Let's watch a male feminist challenge Andrew Tate to a fight to the death.
They're just, they're not even in a ring.
Damn, the blood on that.
What are you thinking?
One overhand.
Look at those giant gloves, too.
They're like 16-ounce gloves.
50 seconds.
Good.
Good, good, good, good.
Good, good.
Dude, that's a duff.
Did you see the body?
My favorite part of that video is the body shots in the middle.
You can't breathe.
He can't fight.
Yeah.
I like that.
Not that one.
It's in the middle.
He's just playing with him, and he likes to because he wants him to punch.
He wants to duck.
It's an actual four-time world champion kickboxer.
Yeah, yeah.
He's clearly having fun just, you know.
A left hook.
You know those drills?
The drills where you missed the uppercut on purpose, you think he missed the uppercut on purpose to get to mention for a left hook?
Yeah, maybe.
That uppercut would be so painful.
Yeah.
If he lands on the bottom, John's worst fear is right here.
The one he knocks him down with.
Oh, it's clear.
See, I like those body shots.
They're not glamorous.
Well, that's a liver shot right there.
Yeah, yeah.
That left hook to the right side of his body's right.
And you can kind of see the guy go, I don't feel so good.
Yeah, you see that face?
It's probably going to piss blood.
What were you thinking?
Did you think Andrew Tate was fake and he's never been in a fight?
It was all an act?
Yeah, that overhand right there?
The word for that is just a duff.
That's just a duff.
Duff.
And then to collapse on a weight, like a treadmill is funny also.
Okay, I want to go behind the paywall now.
Are we all caught up on the super chats?
No, I think there was a $100 one that we still.
Okay, let's do it.
All right.
All right.
Bam.
Oh, no.
That was the $100 one.
So we have a 50, 10, and 25.
Okay, so that guy who wants to fight you, I mean, we're open to that, right?
Same weight class.
I'd love to know your weight class, and that's about it.
Maddie, have you been bitten by a tick lately?
They cause the mammalian meat.
Yeah, that is true.
If you get certain types of lime, you can't eat red meat.
Huh.
But no, I wasn't eating red meat at the time.
I ate red meat later on after that.
It was nuts.
It was nuts.
You were eating nuts.
It was some kind of Brazilian nut.
It was nuts.
Yeah.
It was crazy.
You had nut allergies?
I didn't know until yesterday.
Apparently.
Your whole life you've been eating nuts and never had a problem.
Well, I never had this one particular nut yesterday.
I've been swallowing nuts my whole life.
Is that something you can eat?
These nuts?
These nuts.
These nuts are here when I close my eyes.
Yeah, I mean, it affected my...
It was crazy.
It was weird, dude.
It felt like somebody was strangling me.
I'm going to get you an EpiPen for these nuts.
I know.
Next chat thing in my doodle.
Why can't women grasp where North, West, East, and South is without a compass?
I guess they've never had to.
I heard that the other day.
Go down a bit.
Is that Steven Crowder?
What are your thoughts on dating a girl who flip-flops on the relationship?
I've dated this girl, and we'll reconnect every year or so, and she always ends it.
That's just a friends with benefits.
Because we have a lot in common.
Yeah, she's done.
Yeah.
It's done.
Keep banging her, though.
Bang her if you're bored.
That's a FWB.
Friends with benefits.
Friends with benefits.
Friendly with Benny.
All right, guys, we're going behind the paywall now.
We'll continue taking calls, reading letters, talking to the cops, the felons, and Sylvia.
But as far as you freeloaders go, you're done.
So you're kicked out of here.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
Be brave and never stop fighting.
Shake up at the disco when I think I've got a ball.
I ask her lots of questions as she hangs onto the wall.
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