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Jan. 14, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:07:31

GOML LIVE #131 - THE LYING EPISODE

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	Live from New York, it's Get Off My One with Devin McGuinness.
	That's a first.
	It's got great sound, even with the obstructions, the obstacles in its way.
	Yeah, you'd think it would sound muffled down there.
	Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to GOML Live.
	I was raped on the way here, and my voice is a little hoarse from screaming.
	Help!
	Help!
	No one came except the perpetrator.
	Don't interrupt me because you'd guessed the end of the day.
	No, because I knew it because you told me before.
	Welcome back, Maddie O'Dell.
	Huh, everybody.
	Haven't had him here in two weeks, right?
	Oh, New Year's Eve, I was there.
	Well, we had Jan 6.
	Just meandering.
	Right.
	Well, that's two weeks.
	Yeah.
	That's two.
	Two co-stars have corrected me now.
	No.
	Twice.
	I'm not good at math.
	I was always told don't do math in public.
	What the fuck?
	Where did we see that before?
	Where they said, I'm not doing two.
	Oh, yeah, I was watching a documentary about Agnostic Front, and the singer, Roger Murray Moret, was on the phone.
	He's like, I can't do that.
	No, I got a family now.
	I'm not doing two.
	I'm not doing three fucking weeks.
	No way.
	25 days, tops.
	He's not doing too well.
	Are you sure?
	Yeah, he's been in and out of hospitable cancer.
	Oh, right.
	Yeah.
	Like, he's unlike Joe.
	He's really going through it.
	I thought he had beat it, though.
	Can we get an update on that, Ryan?
	Joey Moretz?
	Roger Moret.
	Joey Moretz, he says.
	You got the sponsors there?
	What are they?
	I can just wing it.
	Let's see.
	Roger Moret.
	Like, check news.
	No, you spelt it wrong.
	M-I-R-E-T.
	Remember the other day we were trying to find some guy who was making fun of people at the gym, and he types in J-I-M.
	For gym.
	Yeah.
	G-Y-M.
	Shocking.
	At the gym.
	While we're shitting on you, Ryan, and you look up those two assignments, one is to find out the latest on Roger Moret, and the other is to find out the sponsors.
	I want to give you shit for this fucking mantis shrimp.
	Okay.
	Where the fuck is it?
	I don't know.
	Well, it was your assignment.
	Yeah.
	Okay, that's September 11th.
	September 11th?
	It's in remission, yeah.
	That's good.
	I mean, I follow him on social media, and he was actually in the hospital a couple times.
	Since September?
	Yeah.
	Fuck.
	Moment of silence.
	Yeah, we need you to get us a mantis shrimp.
	Okay.
	What is your deal?
	Okay.
	I don't know.
	I'll get a mantis shrimp.
	Get it now.
	Let's watch you do it.
	How do you do it anyway?
	Because when I looked it up, it was like, there's one in Arizona.
	What are we going to do?
	Ship it here in a fucking styrofoam container?
	Wait, I got forwarded the ad reads and I can't see the attachment.
	Okay, I'll handle that.
	I can't.
	Genie.
	I don't see the attachment.
	But like, how do you get a weird fish like that?
	I believe they send it to you.
	Okay, how?
	In like some sort of cooler.
	That's crazy, man.
	Yeah.
	That's crazy, Jamie.
	How the fuck does it survive?
	It doesn't.
	Okay, I got the live reads here.
	And the first one is tactical walls, of course.
	Tactical walls, they're here on our walls.
	And we're jealous that we can't have guns here in New York.
	We can have rifles and stuff, but the rest of America gets those cool handgun holders and stuff.
	And we can have long guns.
	That's about it.
	What's the rule?
	36 inches.
	How long does the barrel have to be?
	16 inches.
	16 inches.
	So basically me with the bonus.
	Two of my boners, head to head, is what it has to be.
	And that's not good enough.
	We want them to be even smaller than my dick.
	So like under 9 inches.
	TacticalWalls.com, you use the promo code, which will appear right here shortly.
	Gavin15, you get, what is it, 15% off?
	20% off.
	Yeah, enter the promo code Gavin, get 20% off all orders.
	Go to tacticalwalls.com.
	And I can't even begin to list the things.
	So initially, when we say tactical walls, you go, oh, that's cool.
	I can display my guns.
	That is the main thing they sell, but it's the tip of the iceberg.
	Cool doohickeys for your Jeep when you open it up and it's got all these holders and stuff?
	Workbench shit?
	Places to secretly hide your guns?
	I mean, the options are endless.
	This guy is an idiot savant when it comes to plastic.
	Unfortunately, occasionally we have to deal with the idiot part, but you don't.
	You just get the savant all the time.
	I'm just kidding, Tim.
	I'm just kidding.
	So TacticalWalls.com is a sponsor of today's show.
	We have no other sponsors.
	Maybe Johnny Apple CBD is mad at me because I talked about my wife getting way too high on the Delta 8.
	Sorry.
	I don't think that's bad, Johnny Appleseed.
	I mean, I'm saying that people can get really high on your shit.
	Isn't that good?
	Like, don't you want people to go, oh, good, I can get legal weed?
	I guess all weed is legal these days.
	You couldn't get arrested for pot these days, could you?
	Well, it's recreational in New York State now.
	What if we had, This desk was all weed.
	Well, on your person, you're allowed three ounces.
	And in your home, you're allowed up to five pounds.
	That's it.
	Five pounds?
	That wouldn't last me a night.
	So, what if you get caught in your house with six pounds?
	I guess you could get in trouble, I guess.
	They'd probably give you a five pounds.
	But you gotta understand, just because New York State made it legal, same in California, they made it legal years ago, medical and then recreational, it's still illegal federally.
	Oh, right.
	So anything could happen.
	Right.
	If fans want to come in and kick your door and arrest you for it, they could because it's not.
	Because you're in two places.
	You're in New York, but you're also in America.
	Yeah.
	And that's the problem with investing in all of these CBD places.
	Well, CBD is legal.
	What?
	CBD is illegal.
	Sorry.
	But investing in all these weed dispensaries is your money's not safe because it could get shut down at any moment.
	Well, for a long time, I mean, I was in the business for a little bit, and you couldn't get like the issues that you have, processor servers, banks.
	They didn't want anything to do with it.
	Like, you would have it for a few months and then they would find out and shut you down.
	And you'd have to keep going from bank to bank to bank, processing server, processing server.
	Yeah, actually, while we were having trouble with payment processors, that's what we ended up with.
	People who do porn and people who do CBD and weed dispensaries and all that.
	The banks didn't want anything to do with it.
	So this show is as dangerous as drugs.
	What does that tell you?
	This is your brain.
	This is your brain on drugs.
	That clock keeps fucking me up because it stopped.
	So did you get a Zymanta shrimp yet?
	I'm still on it.
	Look it up.
	Let's see you.
	Look for it.
	And one of our fans has a mantis shrimp that's famous on YouTube.
	Really?
	Now, some of them look kind of gray and green.
	I don't want that.
	I want the blinding one that's a rainbow.
	It's a rainbow.
	Let's see it.
	Peacock mantis shrimp.
	Oh, that's what it is.
	Yeah.
	Peacock mantis shrimp.
	How much is that?
	Fucking.
	$100?
	No bucks.
	No hundred bucks.
	I got that on me.
	I spend that on foreskins for my foreskin collection.
	Maybe in two weeks.
	I collect foreskins.
	I didn't know this.
	Yep.
	I have them pickled in brine.
	But let me see that.
	So what do you go back?
	We're finally making some progress on this.
	I think three-year endeavor.
	So your price, $100.
	And then, okay, so say you add to cart.
	Add to cart.
	Okay?
	Why do you keep body hiding?
	Proceed to checkout.
	I just don't want any of my personal info to be auto-filled.
	Oh, I see.
	So I'm trying to make sure we don't.
	Well, there's nothing there.
	But what does it say?
	Does it say like boxes and bags?
	Yeah.
	Eight bucks for that.
	That's fine.
	What are boxes and bags?
	Well, it's just going to be in a plastic bag filled with water, salt water.
	And they're going to put it in there.
	They're going to seal it.
	And they're going to put it in like a styrofoam box and send it to you.
	That's a tough little guy if he can survive on the FedEx truck.
	Let me see.
	Unboxing Manta Shrimp.
	I'm going to look this up.
	Hey, hold on a sec.
	I've got to throw you my credit card.
	Okay.
	Ready?
	Shit, I'm good at throwing credit cards.
	You don't have a saltwater tank, do you?
	No, it's a hard.
	It's so hard to maintain.
	The shrimp are the most finicky of the fish.
	You can handle it.
	That's tough.
	Unboxing mantis shrimp.
	Aren't they like an exoskeleton or something?
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, they're an insect.
	They're not really a fish.
	No.
	Jewish people can't eat them.
	That's why I want one.
	Because the past four fish we've had, we had a Hamulka fish.
	Jews broke in here and ate it.
	We had a koi fish.
	I saw there was two yamulkas on the ground.
	They must have fallen off when they were stealing it.
	One of them had his address in his.
	What's going on with your fucking shirt there, dude?
	Got a hole in it.
	I hate that.
	What the fuck is that for his thumb when it's extended?
	I hate the kids today.
	That's not an example of it, but they're thin, flimsy Darth Vader's boss sweatshirt hoods that are like thinner than sock material.
	Guess what?
	The thing we're putting in this tank cannot, the corals cannot be in there, bro.
	Look at that amazing coral.
	I got him.
	Look at that.
	Beautiful species.
	Ball tin anemone.
	As we're getting the rocks out, I'm going to attempt to get in there with my net that has a hair on it.
	Disgusting.
	Cool that is.
	I would get 100 of those and have them in the middle.
	Can we just see the fucking raccoon?
	I mean, look down at the bottom.
	What's in the blackout man?
	This generation really doesn't know how to get to the point, do they?
	This is how big he is.
	We're finging.
	Don't look at him.
	Really good backing.
	Don't look at him yet.
	Come on.
	Okay, here we go.
	Am I an old asshole or are these kids annoying the shit out of me?
	Maybe it's sick.
	So fucking cool.
	That thing wants to fing kill me.
	Holy shit.
	Punching the air already.
	I'm taking this bag out.
	It's time.
	Let's go, guys.
	Oh my god.
	Holy shit.
	We're gonna have...
	Our unboxing is gonna be way better.
	What they need to do is put the bag in the tank and let the water acclimate to the temperature of the tank.
	Oh my god.
	And then let them out.
	Because if you do that, you're gonna kill that motherfucker.
	Yeah.
	Are they not doing that for real?
	Well, they just put it in a box first.
	They didn't just pour it in the tank.
	Right, but you have to have the box.
	What he's saying is if they're gonna acclimate them into the box, put the box in the tank, but that doesn't work.
	You gotta put the bag in the tank so the temperature is the same.
	Oh, and then let the bag open in like into the tank.
	Yeah.
	Because what they just did, they took them out, put them in that.
	These guys, they can smash through an inch of glass.
	They can smash the subsquad.
	Oh, my God.
	I want that.
	I want, I want, I want, I need, I need, I need.
	And then you feed them fish, I think.
	I'll tell you what, been in the aquarium hobby for big tickets.
	And that's something they really just draw drops.
	I don't think they grow.
	You heard that?
	Yeah.
	You get to do that.
	Guys, we've had this thing overnight, and he is an absolute savage.
	We're going to try to feed him right now.
	Brooke, put her finger right here, charge the camera.
	We're not going to beat our mantis shrimp.
	Yeah, I swear to God.
	But I am going to put my dick in the tank.
	That's a good idea.
	Look at this beautiful piece of shrimp.
	We're going to try to feed the ship.
	If your dick can't take a smash with a mantis shrimp, you have a shitty dick.
	You have a less than shrimp dick.
	Let's go.
	That was it.
	Let's go.
	So a saltwater tank.
	How hard can that be?
	You get a tank.
	Oh, it's time consuming.
	It's terrible.
	It's terrible.
	What's the time consuming?
	Why are you such a fish expert?
	I knew Ryan was into it, but you know us?
	I knew guys that they had brackish water tanks.
	They had saltwater tanks.
	It's just a lot of upkeep.
	Like what?
	You got to empty it out every few days?
	Oh, pH balance, temperatures, species.
	It's a lot of involvement.
	The right subscribe.
	It's not like you get a win a goldfish at the fair and you've got a little bowl and you throw fish in there.
	But we're here every day.
	I mean, yeah, I mean.
	And I assume it can go two, three days over the weekend without.
	Right?
	Let's see.
	Sure.
	This is a video telling all about all about mantis shrimp, how to care for them, and I'm even going to tell you guys where I got mine and where you can get one yourself.
	Ow, ow, ow.
	So start off what a mantis shrimp is.
	It's actually not a type of shrimp.
	It is a stomatopod, which is an ancient group of marine predators that are distantly related to other crystals.
	What do you think?
	Like, this is my belief.
	I believe in God, but I also believe in evolution.
	I believe in the Big Bang.
	And my religious beliefs are, and I think the Pope is fine with this.
	Just like the movie Prometheus, when that guy ate the shit and he dissolved, and then he went into the ocean and became life.
	So God set up this first little domino with this little microchip in it, and he pushed that, and then everything evolved from that.
	So this is all part of the plan.
	Not that we don't have free will.
	You could blow your own head off right now.
	Of course.
	But he knew that there'd be a Maddie Odell.
	He knew some guys would have bad hearts.
	Some guys would have good hearts.
	Some people would die of lung cancer.
	But if they didn't smoke at all, some people could smoke their whole lives.
	That's all like programmed in.
	And there's checks and balances too.
	Like, I don't want you to fuck your sister.
	Okay, I'm going to make the kid retarded.
	Like, just don't do that.
	Or Middle Eastern.
	I don't want you to murder people.
	Okay, people who murder people are going to have nightmares.
	They're not going to be embraced into society.
	There's all kinds of checks and balances.
	He doesn't like socialism, even communism.
	Stalin plays God.
	He tries to feed millions of people.
	Everyone dies.
	The free market, nature, everything is natural.
	But while all this is happening, I think there was some like splash marks.
	So he like jizzed his magic and made human beings.
	But then there's all these losers, which are animals.
	Animals are losers.
	And he doesn't really care about them.
	He's like, eat them if you want.
	I don't know.
	I got some jizz on the wall and it made a thing.
	I was going for humans.
	That was my main thing.
	Humans and then a place for them.
	And I made some coral and some that shit happen naturally in the background.
	And then some animals ended up.
	They're like shitty humans.
	So he was, it's sort of like you're making a bomb, but then there were some other explosions over there.
	And some animals are pretty good.
	Dogs turned out great.
	Cats are all right.
	Fuck it.
	We were, you know, mice, little rodents for a while.
	But then there's stuff that is just off the wall, like hammerhead sharks.
	What the fuck is happening there?
	Yeah, some of the creatures in the ocean are.
	I think God sees hammerhead sharks and he goes, oh, whoa.
	And same with fucking peacock mantis shrimp.
	Like, that's just a boring mantis shrimp.
	But they were not part of the grand plan.
	The grand plan included crazy mistakes, and that's one of the mistakes.
	Oh, that's a mantis shrimp killing.
	Was that a crawfish?
	See, we can't see.
	It's killing another shrimp, it seems.
	That looks like a crawfish.
	Oh, a crawfish.
	Yeah, he just has this thing that comes out and bonks them.
	This is what you need to do and what you need to watch out for if you're going to keep a mantis shrimp in your aquarium.
	First thing is first, food.
	These guys are really thinner.
	No, that's not first thing.
	Mantis shrimp in particular will not accept freeze-dried krill or freeze-dried anything for that matter.
	It needs to either be frozen, as in frozen clams on the half shell.
	Every once in a while, he'll eat some frozen krill just as a little treat.
	But he's not the type of thing that will, or the type of animal that will eat the same meal over and over again.
	Because in the wild, they are opportunistic predators and they go for a lot of different things.
	So you need to vary their diet.
	That should be his name, opportunistic predator.
	Sounds a good name for a band.
	Not only that, you have to feed them live food.
	Hunting is like the biggest thing in the mantis shrimp world.
	Like, not only would you not get a mantis shrimp to not feed it live food, like that just wouldn't make sense, but these guys are not going to be happy unless they are going out and hunting and punching the shit out of their prey because that is what they love to do.
	They will literally go around and punch rocks and break off rocks just because they're bored and they have nothing to do.
	And of course, you would never want to keep anything with a mantis shrimp because it will eat it.
	Not only that, it will eat fish too.
	I know I said that clubbing or not clubbing, but punching mantis shrimp will not go for fish, but they will.
	Mine has eaten goldfish.
	You can click that link above.
	It's a video of him.
	Okay, goldfish is a good one.
	Here's the plan.
	Throw me my credit card back Or I'm going to forget to ask you for it.
	And by the way, you seem reluctant to want to do this because it's more work for you.
	It's your job.
	You're getting paid.
	It's not like I'm going to say, you know, come in here on a Sunday.
	No, it's not that.
	I don't want to let this guy down.
	I mean, because I've considered having saltwater fish and it's just so much...
	You don't want to let the shrimp down?
	Yeah.
	It's a fucking bug.
	See, that's where we differ.
	It's an expensive bug.
	It's a beautiful creature.
	How is it more valuable than a fruit fly?
	Oh, because fruit flies, you don't want to watch that.
	You could watch this guy all day.
	Show me a video of a fruit fly.
	You could make a shrimp fruit.
	So you'd value life by how aesthetically appealing the creature is.
	Well, when it comes to taking care of it, I mean, I can take, like, look how easy it is to take care of a fruit fly.
	That shows you the value.
	Like, nothing good comes of no work.
	And these guys are really good.
	So the more high maintenance a thing is, the higher value the life.
	No, more enjoyable it is.
	Okay, but that's not how you started this discussion.
	You said, I don't want to let this guy down.
	Now you're saying...
	He could die.
	Yeah.
	It's more precious than a fruit fly, in my eyes.
	Why?
	It's bigger.
	It does cooler stuff.
	Okay.
	Like an ant's life versus a dog's life, if you want to go really extreme.
	This thing is closer to a dog.
	Yeah, I understand, but you get into a logistical problem where the Buddhists, they just treat all animals the same.
	I'm not a Buddhist.
	Thank you.
	I'm a Biblist.
	A Christian.
	When you abandon the Buddhist logic of a fruit flies the same as me, or any other animal, I don't know if they go right up to human, then you have to develop this whole hierarchy of like, where is an elephant?
	Is it size related?
	Well, pretty much what it boils down to is every animal is here under the dominion of the human being because we are the sacred creation of God.
	And everything else is pretty much as weird up.
	You can do whatever to animals, but it's where your particular values lie and like where you respect some manual.
	Let's stop the philosophical discussion.
	So are you scared you're not good enough?
	Like, I don't think it's high maintenance.
	I've done a lot of research, and I know people that have had tanks.
	My friend's parents, I just visited them not too long ago.
	And they've had the 14-year tank, and they've had ups and downs with it.
	It's not easy.
	And they don't have, I think it might be brackish.
	Brackish, Maddie, is saltwater and freshwater.
	Yeah.
	And that's easier.
	Well, kind of, sort of.
	Yeah, I guess you're right.
	Because then you have to worry about the blend of the.
	The only thing that's going to be in the tank is the mantis shrimp.
	Because you can't put anything else in there.
	Except when you feed it.
	Yeah.
	Where we got to get this live food.
	Fucking pet stores.
	That's easy.
	That's what's holding you back?
	I'm just scared of the whole process.
	I've looked into saltwater fishing for angel fish and things like that.
	I would love to personally get way more in-depth with my aquarium stuff because I love fish.
	I've always had fish.
	You have a problem where...
	And it might be the fatherlessness where you can't close deals.
	Like, it goes back to the couch.
	I offered you an awesome couch.
	You kept your shitty couch because you don't like making decisions.
	That's why your room at the fag zone was four feet deep and closed because you can't throw out clothes.
	You just got to get into life.
	Buy that manta jumbo shrimp now on my credit card.
	Okay?
	Okay.
	And while it's being shipped, we're going to get a saltwater tank.
	You heard it here first, folks.
	I know this has been an odd show because we've been arguing about peacock manta shrimp the entire time, but you're going to tune in later and you're going to see it.
	Let me make one quick suggestion.
	What?
	Get the tank, set it up first.
	No, no.
	The shrimp's going to get overnighted.
	No, it will not.
	I think it will.
	It will not.
	Okay.
	It's going to take like 10 days.
	Guaranteed.
	No, they overnight it so it doesn't die in the bag.
	Right.
	Pretty strong point.
	Just saying.
	Pretty strong point.
	Get the tank, set it up first, and then.
	If you're watching, sir, because I know he watches the show.
	Wait, he's DM'd me.
	Peacock mantis shrimps watch this show?
	No, not the mantis shrimp itself.
	The owner, I believe it's this guy.
	What guy?
	Nick SBF.
	Yeah, I think this is the dude.
	Nick SBF.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Let's see if I could find him.
	Call him.
	Yeah, yeah, I'm going to try.
	Has he ever contacted you?
	Yeah, through DMs.
	Okay, but that was my right now.
	And then we can Venmo him money and he can send us all this shit, like for the tank and everything.
	Interesting.
	And then we'll have that set up.
	And then we'll have like his shot.
	Like he has his own.
	What do you do salt water?
	You get normal water and then you just add salt to it?
	Well, not like we need to get...
	Wait a minute.
	We can get salt water 10 feet from here.
	Aquarium salt, right?
	They call it instant ocean.
	My saltwater tank after six months, now a year in, somebody...
	Okay.
	But like, there's saltwater.
	Isn't the Hudson River saltwater?
	Yeah, no, it's brackish.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Because it's a...
	What if it's a river that flows south?
	It's freshwater and it intersects with the Atlantic.
	What if we went down to Staten Island?
	That's brackish.
	When does it turn into the ocean?
	Like, right past the Verizon Bridge and stuff.
	Staten Island's past the Verizon Bridge.
	Yeah, it's right there.
	Okay, so we go to Staten Island.
	It's a fucking 40-minute drive.
	Bring a bucket, and we got salt water.
	True.
	See?
	We're doing shit.
	I'm messaging people.
	We're going to get shit rolling this episode.
	I'm sick of waiting for a shrimp because we look like bullshitters.
	Like, the whole point of this show is like, hey, this is happening.
	We need to fight back.
	We're living under tyranny.
	These fucking mandates are nuts.
	Come on, let's rise up.
	You know, patriotism, liberty, venerate the housewife, glorify the entrepreneur.
	Come on, never stop fighting.
	And then I'm like, we're going to get a mantis shrimp.
	And then we're sitting here with no fucking shrimp.
	Sitting here with no shrimps.
	You're like, oh, Well, what else is bullshit?
	Now I get it.
	Never stop fighting.
	Never stop fighting unless it's saltwater and then give up.
	That's a good point.
	It's not a good message.
	I didn't see it like that before, but no, I get it now.
	Well, wait a minute.
	I don't like that that's how you see it now.
	Well, there's a symbolism there.
	Because I'm also doing it for you because I want you to be able to just fucking do shit.
	Just follow my dreams of...
	You know, I've always wanted a saltwater fish, so you're right.
	Salt brackish fish.
	I'm going to look this guy up.
	Like, I remember my dad wanted to knock down a supporting wall at his house, and he was like, oh, it's complicated and all that.
	Because if we knock down this wall, we've got to have beams, an I-beam across, and then two beams going down right to the basement.
	And then, well, they're just sitting in the basement.
	And I go, no, they probably need a, we're going to dig in to the cement of the foundation.
	And then the I-beams are going that, and then we'll use cement.
	And he goes, so you think we're just meant to dig a hole in cement?
	I go, yeah, let's do it.
	I just grabbed a sledgehammer and went, wham!
	And then we just started, wham, wham, wham.
	And we dug a huge hole in the foundation.
	Next thing you know, we get the, we didn't put in the I-beams, but the guys get in the I-beams, fill in the cement.
	He can look out into his backyard.
	Sporting wall is gone.
	Beautiful.
	Beautiful.
	He died in the collapse.
	Oh my God, I'm sorry.
	Yeah, two weeks later.
	Jim McGinnis died?
	Jimmy's done.
	Oh, fuck.
	Fuck.
	No, it's still going strong.
	Oh.
	That was a lie.
	This is the lying episode.
	I've told about 100 lies.
	We should open the phone lines, and if people know about fish, I mean, shrimp.
	Yeah, that's a good idea.
	Oh, I want to do a super chat tonight to raise money for Max and John.
	Dude, Max Hare called me from prison tonight.
	Oh, shit.
	And guess what he said?
	From, I mean, outside of cancer and other serious illnesses, what is hell on earth?
	It's prison.
	Okay.
	Right?
	Like, I guess being trapped under a car is worse, but it's a rough place to be.
	And he calls me.
	I'm at my son's birthday party at Five Guys.
	And which was in Palo Manor.
	And just a little side note here.
	That fucking area, it put me in such a bad mood.
	I'm in a good mood now, but it started when I arrived at Dave and Buster's, and we're at a red light.
	And the person facing me in the red light just has their fucking brights on.
	I don't know how many people in Palow Manor, which is just north of the Bronx, can hear me right now.
	I don't know how many of you are watching.
	Your brights are for an old country road, a windy road late at night.
	You're the only one for miles.
	And in the forest, you're worried about a deer popping out.
	Okay, put your brights on.
	But the second you even smell a hint of someone coming in the opposite direction, you fucking, oh my God, it's like being seen taking a shit and nude in the street.
	You whack off your, you whack off.
	You slam off your brights and go, sorry, sorry.
	It's a sin.
	And even that millisecond that they got flashed, like, I'm so sorry.
	Won't happen again.
	This guy's just sitting there like, I don't know.
	Maybe he's a Mexican and they don't know that.
	Or maybe it was some stupid bitch on welfare.
	It's just like, because when I flashed him, he turned them off.
	So that means they're aware.
	They didn't just go, fuck you.
	So it's not a complete asshole.
	It's just an idiot.
	And that just set me off for the rest of the fucking night.
	Fuck.
	People overindulging themselves and wearing pajamas and like everyone's waiting to get in and they're asking all these questions about the Dave and Buster's card.
	You don't have a Dave and Buster's card.
	This dude trying to get military, the military rate, I think because his dad was in the military.
	No, dude, you have to be active service, you fuck.
	Move it.
	Let's go.
	And by the way, why are you waiting here?
	The machines have the cards.
	Go to the machine, get the card, put in 20 bucks.
	What?
	You can't figure that out yourself?
	Or do you not even have a fucking credit card, you loser?
	I don't see what's so funny about that at all.
	Yeah, pretty good point there, Delaine.
	So anyway, Max calls me from Five Guys.
	He's like, hey, man, are you okay?
	I'm eating the best fries on earth.
	And I'd already had a burger, so I was having a delicious bacon cheese dog.
	And I'm like, I'm doing pretty good here.
	I'm literally at a party.
	Why?
	And he goes, oh, it just said on Fox in the, what's it called?
	The mess hall?
	What's the area you can watch TV in pretty much?
	The common area.
	I just saw in the common area that you were arrested.
	You're in trouble for JN6.
	So I guess they've been doing more arrests for the meandering with Proud Boys.
	And they also arrested oath keepers.
	Yeah, like the head guy.
	The head guy.
	Seditious conspiracy or something like that.
	Right, which according to Max is 20 years.
	He goes, it's the kind of sentence you see in here for like burning down a residential building.
	And I'm like, well, that would be pretty weird for me to go to jail for that, considering I have plenty of video evidence two weeks before saying, don't go, don't go.
	Bad news.
	What does seditious mean?
	I'm not familiar with the word.
	It means to overthrow the government.
	Oh.
	Yeah.
	But as we said, we won't go back into the meandering, but as we said last week's episode, surely insurrection, being arrested for it, involves times and places.
	And I was saying this to Max.
	Be here at four.
	We'll meet here.
	We'll flank down the side.
	Right.
	Not just on Telegram going, fuck the government, fuck this election.
	Nah.
	And did you see all this shit with Ray Epps?
	Now I'm going back into it.
	Where they go, he's not with the FBI.
	Sure.
	And simply saying storm the Capitol isn't a crime.
	That's free speech.
	And you go, well, I agree with you, but you kind of opened a Pandora's box here because that's what you're basically throwing everyone in for.
	And that's why you want Trump to never be able to run again because, according to you, he said storm the Capitol, which he obviously didn't.
	He said peaceful protests, et cetera, et cetera.
	Anyway, so I go, Yeah, I'm doing okay, Max.
	Thanks for calling me from prison to see if I'm having a bad day.
	And that was that.
	So that's why I want to have a fundraiser.
	That's not why, but I want to have a fundraiser for them because I like this super chat stuff, but it feels weird for me, a financially sound human being, to be accepting $5 here and $2 there to say happy birthday, Veronica.
	So if it's going to charity, I can live with it.
	Paychats.
	Paychats.
	So what do we have to tell people?
	Oh, is it already happening?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Oh, okay.
	So these people have paid?
	Yes.
	I know I sound like a boomer.
	Okay, and we'll tell everyone the total at the end.
	And then to make sure I'm not ripping anyone off, you can contact...
	I'll give it to Zenoa Kinsman.
	She's been the one that's been handling John and Max's bank account.
	You can talk to her.
	You can contact them in prison.
	They're easy to find.
	You can say, is Gavin scamming anyone?
	Yo, G-Dog, can you tell a quick story about being on Red Eye with Nick Mullen or your thoughts on Comtown?
	Sherlock Shitty, can you do a sneaker pimp impression?
	Well, we don't usually do two things, but this is a super chat.
	I don't, yeah, Nick Mullen, I got a weird vibe from him.
	It's sort of like Scott Greer, where I was like, you don't seem to like me very much, but we're the same dude.
	Like we have the same interests and everything.
	We should be totally vibing.
	I don't know.
	I'm a very aggressive human being, and I think a lot of people sort of go, calm down.
	He admits that he's autistic.
	And so that could be kind of an introvert, but very smart, very funny guy.
	And good at impressions, too.
	Donate a message to read on there.
	So if you go to the live thing, you see where live.
	This is on censor.tv.
	Censor.tv, right under.
	You know what's crazy?
	You want to hear fucking nuts, PTSD?
	I just said in my head, I was like, ooh, can we say that?
	Whoa.
	Or are they going to shut it down?
	Wow.
	Remember on Steve?
	That would be funny if...
	Hey, tech guy, if you're watching, we got to do that.
	If you say censor.tv in the comments, it doesn't show up.
	It's like, sorry, it seems like you've used a term that we don't agree with.
	Yeah, we got to do that.
	That's funny.
	And then, but it has to come up that you can't from now on, starting tonight.
	Lots of big events tonight.
	Starting tonight, we're getting a peacock manta shrimp, and you cannot say censored.tv on our site.
	It's banned.
	It's censored.
	Motherfuckers.
	So yeah, Nick Mullen, he was weird.
	I could tell he was a funny dude.
	I always want to bond with guys like that when we have stuff in common.
	Scott Greer, same thing.
	I was like, what's the matter?
	That's the one I said, let's do a bump.
	Name the shrimp Maddie Meat Missile.
	Maddie's Meat Missile.
	Maddie's Meat Missile.
	I guess we have to do that.
	There you go.
	We have to ask his permission.
	I don't want to.
	Is that okay with you?
	What about me?
	I don't think we have to ask him permission for that.
	$50 for Max.
	Oh, nice.
	South Cal G. You know what John is doing now?
	I sent him these books on how to do comic books after I heard he was doing this, but he's going to do autobiographical comics of prison.
	Awesome.
	Now, don't say shit like, there was this fucking bitch who thought he was the toughest guy in the prison, and I always laughed in his face.
	Not that John is like a mouse over there, but you don't want to be like pissing anyone off in your comics because someone's going to see them.
	Yeah.
	You'll pass them around.
	It'll go.
	When he told me that, I got super excited.
	Like, who the fuck does it, even if it's so mundane?
	Like, Chester Brown is the king of the mundane autobiographical comics.
	And I have, it's a tough sell to a lot of people, which contradicts exactly what I'm saying now.
	But I fucking love it.
	Like, he'll wake up, he'll go get a sandwich.
	Even his art is really sort of meek with paintbrushes and stuff.
	And you're just like, I'm in someone else's brain.
	I'm going to get a sandwich in Toronto.
	Are you digging up Chester Brown?
	I'm doing a couple things right now.
	Okay.
	Chester Brown.
	Yeah.
	I don't need the guy.
	Look how fucking ugly he is.
	Poor bastard.
	Just do Chester Brown comics.
	He's an alarmingly unattractive man.
	Oh, he's been doing the Bible recently page by page.
	But go back, see if you can find just him just petering around Toronto, getting a coffee.
	Is him sitting on his couch?
	No, that's Joe Matt drawing Chester Brown sitting on his couch.
	Yeah, he's been doing more fiction recently.
	Keep going down.
	He did a big thing on Louis Riel, which was a fascinating book.
	It should be taught in schools.
	Anyway, maybe that's it.
	No, that's weird stuff.
	But wouldn't it be awesome just seeing a guy like going doing his average day in prison, drawing all the dudes there?
	And he's getting good at drawing.
	The only way he could fuck it up is if he doesn't adhere to the strict rules of cartooning with the nine panels per page or the 2468.
	In this case, the consistent number.
	There we go.
	Yeah.
	That's called love something, where he decides that love is a myth and I just want to, I'll fuck a prostitute and then I'll have female friends.
	And love is a myth.
	I don't need love.
	Go back to that?
	And it's all true.
	That's the crucial part.
	It has to be 100% true.
	Don't change anything.
	And you have to be really heartfelt too.
	Like, oh, I was really scared.
	Or I thought this guy was an idiot, but it was advantageous to be his friend.
	That has to be in there too, in the thought bubbles.
	But in this story, I forget the name of this series, but he goes, Love doesn't exist.
	You just need friends.
	And then when you're horny, you get a prostitute.
	And then he realizes, I'm just going to get a prostitute, but she can stay with me.
	I keep getting the same one and spending the money.
	Why doesn't she just stay here?
	It's like living at a hotel.
	Yeah.
	So then she moves in with him.
	And then he doesn't fuck other prostitutes.
	And she doesn't have any other clients.
	So they're married.
	You're married, Chester.
	Congratulations.
	Holy shit.
	You beat the system.
	I love when that happens.
	And you got to spend money on your wife anyway, right?
	You pay either way.
	That's what we just said.
	You left the punchline and went backwards into this.
	Oh, look at PayChat.
	From Greg.
	Should we not say their names?
	Do they want their names?
	I don't know.
	Well, that's their username, so it's public on the site.
	I have two things I want to say.
	One, shout out to Lotus and Seoul for being the only censored.tv creators that aren't hungry for BBC, which is Big Black Cock, I guess.
	Yes.
	Or the British Broadcasting.
	I'm not hungry for...
	I don't like Big Black Cocks or the British Broadcasting Service.
	I'm hungry for Zero Cocks.
	Even if I was hungry for Cox, I don't think I'd be hungry for Black Cocks.
	Yeah.
	Black Cocks down.
	Two, 10 years of debauchery might deprive you of the love of your life.
	There are exceptions to every rule.
	Whoa.
	That's a fortune cookie.
	Yeah, that's the little riddle he sent us.
	Damn, that's Daniel.
	That's crazy.
	I was talking to the bartender across from the studio at Anthony's studio, and she's Irish, and they've got an Irish pub there.
	And she was quoting her brothers because they own a pub.
	And the dad says, maybe we should just shut down.
	I mean, it's getting strict here.
	And I don't want us to lose our license.
	And his son, who's really the owner, says, no fucking way.
	Let the riddles run free and the feared can stay at home.
	Let the riddles run free.
	Isn't that awesome?
	Nice.
	I want to let the riddles run free.
	Oh, we should go behind the paywall.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, you're just going to clip it, right?
	Yeah, let's just clip it.
	Yeah, let's just clip it.
	Sorry, guys.
	You want to put your mics on so that we can take some cameras?
	Oh, so sorry.
	Oh, so sorry about it.
	What a weird piece of digital equipment.
	You need to hold the on button for eight seconds.
	It's flawed.
	It should be a triple click or something.
	Yeah, I've never come across that in the modern world.
	Shtinks.
	This chain is not really working in this particular neckline.
	Yeah, so we'll see how much we raise for them tonight.
	We got this.
	$5 from Jason.
	The Tim, which is the bald pool.
	That's great.
	Thank you.
	Why aren't you making those rectangles?
	You know, I could.
	You have a strange sense of design.
	It's my design.
	Yeah, it's not a good look.
	So, like, here's this, right?
	You see more of you than if you were to go like this.
	It's not aesthetically pleasing, Ryan.
	It's hard to explain to you graphic design, but a broken shard of glass is not appealing to the eyes.
	It should be a symmetrical rectangle.
	Here we go.
	Internationale Quebin.
	And then just make it smaller.
	Yeah.
	And what about all this space up here?
	Well, your head will get cut off if we keep it at like a readable.
	You know what I mean?
	And can't you crop it a little bit?
	Some people's messages.
	That's the thing I'm trying to avoid, because we have a lot.
	Avoid resizing this all the time.
	So some people's message will be a little longer, so it'll be like okay.
	So it's a pin in my so I guess go across the bottom.
	Hey, Gav.
	I'm live in Las Vegas.
	How do I join a local Proud Boys chapter?
	You know, the beauty of the Proud Boys is if you're tenacious enough to figure it out, then you can figure it out.
	It's not the Boy Scouts.
	I'm not going to sit here and go, well, you should call Mark Norrell.
	And he's over at the strip every Thursday with his pamphlets.
	Like, figure it out, dude.
	Secondly, don't fuck around, Kebin, because when you fuck around, you get abuse.
	See?
	Why do people love that story so much?
	It's a funny quote.
	I've been threatened a million times, but everyone, that happened in 1999.
	That happened 22 years ago, and people keep asking me about it.
	Kevin.
	He was short, too.
	It's not like, don't think it was like Mutabaruka, this six-foot-tall Rasta man going, don't fuck around, Kabin.
	I don't want to ruin the story for you, but he was not an intimidating guy.
	He was a little weird.
	He looked like the bad guy from Ghost, but five feet tall and skinny.
	And he didn't have dreads.
	His head was just an afro.
	So, I mean, I was scared that he was going to like attack me like a crazy cat and poke my eyes out or something, but it wasn't like, you know, wagwan kind of a thing.
	We got somebody on the loin here.
	It's Carlos, I believe.
	I believe, Carlos.
	Hello.
	What's up, Carlos?
	Hey, I am a couple episodes behind, so I don't know.
	Also, there's a crazy echo.
	Just putting that out there.
	Okay.
	We don't want the echo.
	If you're going to talk about the ABBO translator, we've covered it.
	Oh, no, no, no.
	I'm a couple episodes behind.
	And I know back in this day, you were talking about your water heater and why people would come pick it up.
	Yes.
	And I wanted to shed some light on that.
	Okay.
	First of all, stop talking about shedding light.
	When I bring things up on this show, I'm not a retard.
	So I've spoken to plumbers.
	I've spoken to junk guys.
	A lot of people in the field are also very perplexed about this.
	So what you're going to offer now is a theory, but you're not teaching us About the water heaters, okay, young man?
	No, shedding light, you're just putting some more light on it.
	You're not like saying this is what it is, you know what I mean?
	Well, sure, okay, sure.
	So, my dad is a heavy equipment mechanic, and he works in junkyards and stuff.
	And he says cat, like scrap metal is an all-cash business.
	So, the reason people go get the stuff is because they have like child support, or like their garnishes are, their wages are being garnished, and they're probably on welfare.
	So, it's an all-cash business.
	It doesn't count against their welfare, and it doesn't get sent off to the baby mom or anything.
	So, they just kind of like you were saying about beavers, like they're just kind of beavers that get everything, and they're just collecting beer money for the day.
	So, they just drive around, and as long as they have enough for beer money for the day, but outside of the cash thing, it's from the call to the water heater to wherever it's going.
	And I know you don't do it, you don't go sell it immediately, but the whole process from soup to nuts has got to be an hour, an hour, 20 minutes.
	You're getting 20 bucks for these things.
	I mean, 20 bucks an hour is all you need, really, if you're just, if you're not trying to pay rent, you're living on welfare and you're just trying to get enough money to buy your drinks or your whatever powders you want to put in your nose, whatever you want.
	You know what I mean?
	Yeah, I guess.
	It seems like there's a lot better things you could do.
	Construction's a cash business if you're doing it, you know, under the table.
	You're going to do a lot better.
	Like the fucking illegals at Home Depot, they all get 20 bucks an hour.
	Go stand with the Mexicans at Home Depot.
	I'm just saying, I don't know.
	I'm not saying they're smart or if it's a good business decision.
	I'm just saying the light you have shed is not even the flashlight on an iPhone.
	It's just looking at a picture that's kind of bright and using that as a light.
	So, we are ahead, but not much.
	Thanks for calling.
	Thanks.
	Love you.
	Oh, we didn't do the thanks for calling thing.
	We certainly did not.
	What an odd show.
	But that's what I like about this show.
	You never know what you're going to get.
	You are on air.
	This is a fucking loser.
	You want me to learn, share, listen, understand why.
	Hey, why does everyone get two things?
	You have one thing.
	Thank you for calling.
	It was great hearing from you.
	Bye-bye.
	All right, next call.
	By the way, is it super chat?
	Is that the term the kids are using?
	Paychats.
	The paychat.
	So in the paychat, you...
	Thank you, sir.
	You don't need one thing.
	Calls only get one thing.
	But paychats get...
	You can sneak in as much as you want.
	Really?
	No.
	You can sneak in as much as you want.
	If it's 50 bucks, you can have fucking 100 things.
	Yeah.
	But anything over $5 can be two things.
	Joe lawyer, but can you call me Dave?
	Where the fuck is Andrew WK?
	Don't get me started on it.
	He just married that super hot chick from two broke girls.
	The blonde?
	Or the chubby one?
	No, the hotter one.
	The Jew with the fucking tits from heaven.
	Yeah, the chubby one.
	Yeah.
	What's her name again?
	I forget.
	Katie Girl.
	He was already married, though.
	He married his aerobics instructor or whatever.
	No, he married a girl from the gym who was also an aerobics instructor.
	They had a baby.
	Kat Dennings.
	And then I guess he married Kat Dennings, who she fucking photographs real well.
	Now, you know, when she has no makeup on, blah, blah, blah, you're sort of like, you get buyer's remorse, but he's doing well.
	The thing about Andrew WK people don't understand is he looks like this big hulking metal dude.
	He's a nerd and like a pop culture nerd.
	He used to work at Kim's Video on St. Mark's.
	Do you remember Kim's video?
	It was like three floors of VHS tapes and no Star Wars or You Got Mail.
	It was all weird shit like Godzilla porn and fucking some guy who Bud Dwyer videos.
	So that's who he is.
	And then he started working out and getting fit.
	So he doesn't look like what he is.
	By the way, I fucking love the guy.
	Great guy, but you know, he's more like the pot awful dude on the inside.
	Jesse, yeah.
	Like he smokes weed all night.
	Well, Jesse is sober.
	He does never, he never smoked weed, never drank.
	Yeah, I don't care, right?
	I'm talking about the sort of pop culture nerd.
	Copper Cab got married?
	He sure did.
	To his sister, I believe.
	Yeah, see, we don't know anything with Copper Cab.
	We don't know what's real or not.
	Yeah!
	Hey, ooh.
	Yeah, he got married.
	You know what I should do while we're doing all this is also get mail.
	Let's have three different ways to talk to the peoples.
	Interestante.
	Big Dick Johnson.
	Hey, Gavin, let's get a Joker face.
	Can you also rub your balls on Ryan's forehead?
	That's yes to both.
	Let's do.
	Do you want to do the music for Joker face?
	Yes.
	Okay.
	That part I'll do.
	Let's see your Joker face.
	Oh, who me?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	I mean, it's one thing to catch a guy, catch a Korean, or whatever he is, and then to actually get your balls out at the same time.
	Yeah.
	You have to be over him.
	I am over him.
	We broke up years ago.
	No, you're not.
	You still yearn For me, you're in love.
	Oh, I had a Maddie question earlier.
	Uh-oh.
	I can still jump through the window.
	It wouldn't be safe.
	It'd be dangerous.
	Here's a question for Maddie Odell.
	It's me.
	Oh, this is weird.
	This has your address.
	It calls you a bitch and says he's going to be there tonight waiting for you.
	Nice.
	I love those.
	I'll be ready.
	No, that was not true.
	This is the lying episode, if you recall.
	In Hunter S. Thompson's book on the Hell's Angels, he describes how the initiation requires being covered in the shit and piss of the other members and then having to wear those shit-stained clothes until they rot.
	What?
	No.
	He also says that new members might be forced to give head to more senior members, not because they're gay, but as the ultimate gesture of loyalty.
	I have always wondered how much of this is truth and how much is bullshit.
	I wonder if Mandy has any thoughts on this.
	And if he can't talk directly about certain organizations, what thoughts does he have about different initiation rituals and different ways that people can express their loyalty?
	And then he includes pics of shit and piss covered bikers in this link.
	And the subject is, Ryan, is letter for Maddie.
	I do see Hell's Angels pissing on each other.
	Sort of.
	Okay.
	Yeah, someone seems to be peed on.
	And then someone seems to be covered in blood or something?
	No.
	If somebody tried to pee on me, it would be a big fucking problem.
	See, that's old because if you look at their cuts, they're wearing the original death head, and those are Purdue members, which is the first charter.
	Right, but Hunter Thompson's book was very old.
	He's talking about Hunter Thompson's allegation.
	Yeah.
	If that's what they did back then, you know, I can't really speak about it because I wasn't there.
	Like, that, I don't believe it's a Hell's Angel.
	I don't see any flash on the front or anything like that.
	You know, some guy's fucking a chicken.
	Okay.
	I mean, I can't see what that patch was, but the guy's going down on some girl.
	That's a rough initiation.
	Straight Satan's?
	Straight Satan's?
	Yeah, there's a club out in California.
	All right, you want to be in this club?
	You have to eat out this chick.
	Oh, man.
	Can't you just cover me in pieces of chicken?
	It's different, but yeah, like somebody shitting on me or pissing on me, and I have to...
	No, I wouldn't tolerate that.
	So I guess the book came out in 67.
	I guess he was doing all the research in 65 or so.
	I mean, even back then, I mean, guys were about like, I'm a fucking alpha male.
	Like, I'm not going to let someone piss and shit on me to be subservient.
	Like, that's totally against the character of what the membership that you're looking for.
	Yeah, yeah, good point.
	Like, I wouldn't.
	If you have a slave, you could shit and piss.
	I might drink my own piss or throw shit at a wall, but the idea of lying down while someone defecates on you, you're like, this is not a good idea.
	Maybe in the beginning, years of the, like, for a year, I mean, the club started in 48, you know, then there was San Francisco was the second charter, and then Oakland was the third, and they weren't affiliated.
	They were just independent people that had a club that used the name Hell's Angels until they started running into each other, and they said, hey, we should kind of link up and be one.
	And like, that's how it gets, like, so.
	Oh, and they were all called Hell's Angels.
	Right.
	Right.
	You know, Purdue was in 48.
	Frisco was in sometimes in the 50s.
	And then Oakland was in 57.
	Those were the first three.
	And then that started.
	Once they started running into each other on the streets and riding by, you know, Oakland and Frisco were stone's throw apart.
	You go over to Bay Bridge and you're right there.
	I mean, Purdue is a trip down, you know, five, six hours down state.
	Yeah, you think San Francisco and Oakland, I mean, it's the same place, really.
	Pretty much.
	Yeah, you go over to Bay Bridge or the Golden, you're right there.
	I mean, you literally go on the opposite side of the water to the bay and you're there.
	That's Oakland.
	This is Frisco.
	And you got Daly City, San Jose, you know, in the surrounding Bay Area.
	But San Francisco opened up a charter.
	They said it was the Hells Angels and Sonny Barger came home and he started one in 57, Oakland Charter.
	But Purdue was the original.
	Otto Friedley started in March 15th or 17th, 1948.
	And then, you know, into the 50s, you know, Frisco came around, I think, 53 or 54.
	Then Oakland started in 57.
	And like I said, when they started running into each other, and like, you used to have what they call Oakland Frisco Wars.
	Like, we're the real Hells Angels.
	You're the real Hells Angels.
	You know, they used to have all crazy rules of war with each other and stuff.
	I wish not just the Hells Angels would emerge, but all biker clubs would merge.
	If they did, if they all became one under one flag, and it would probably never ever happen, but that would be the biggest fuck you to the government because they wouldn't know what to do.
	I wouldn't know what to do.
	But I can't speak about people back in the 50s and what their ritual was.
	I mean, guys used to kiss each other just for shock value.
	Right.
	Like for photographers and stuff like that.
	I can't confirm or deny what they did back then for their initiation.
	I used to do that.
	We used to do that at parties just to make everyone uncomfortable.
	If somebody tried to piss and shit out, it'd be a big problem.
	Dude, I was thinking I was watching this video, Maddie, and I was like, you know, this guy's really playing a dangerous game.
	It's Jack something TV in Britain, and this is what he does.
	Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
	Jickle, wiggle, wiggle.
	Dude, I was like, you are playing a game with your life.
	What?
	She's doing it to the black people of white people, which is the Irish.
	Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
	Jickle, wiggle, wiggle.
	I've seen a few of these, like, the shock video, like, people go out and try to do stuff and have had guns pulled on them.
	Oh, yeah.
	And they're like, no, no, no, it's just a video chip.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I saw that.
	There was the guy in the hood dressed as a clown, scaring people.
	And then he goes, it's just a joke.
	They go, I don't give a fuck what a joke is, motherfucker.
	Yeah, this is a joke, too.
	Don't get fucking twisted.
	This is great.
	Wait.
	Nickel wiggle.
	What the hell are you doing and who are you?
	He's just like a nerd.
	This guy, though, he wants to fucking beat this shit.
	No, I think he's in Britain.
	Nickel wiggle.
	Do you know who this mother is?
	No, I don't.
	That's a sure way to get hurt.
	Dude, I was like nervous.
	Every new one of these.
	I could see if it was a hot chick.
	He gets beat up in some of them.
	Here, look.
	Let's see.
	God bless him.
	We want him to get beat up.
	Oh, wait, he did it with a tranny?
	I wonder what that thing's response was.
	He liked the attention, obviously.
	Tickle wickle wickle.
	Fancier, what's going on?
	He doesn't mind.
	So this is annoying.
	That's going to show us him getting beat up.
	This bloke, he turned Muslim.
	So fucking cut.
	Because his girlfriend's.
	Wait, the tickle wickle guy's Muslim now?
	Yeah, he's a white dude who looks like an in-shape.
	Who's the fat guy that we don't like?
	Matt?
	Matty?
	O'Donnell?
	No, no, no.
	Santoro?
	Matt Santoro or Needle Drop Podcast Guy?
	Ew.
	He married a fucking Schwarma queen.
	I know her.
	That's Norma.
	I used to date her.
	No.
	Yeah, I wrote a song about her.
	It goes, I wrap my baby in pita and cheese and I call her Norma the Schwarma.
	She's not as tacky as a Greek souvlaki.
	She's not as sweet as Donair.
	But she's my bear.
	I forget.
	You're forgetting it.
	I forgot it.
	We broke up a long time ago.
	Oh, good.
	Finally a black guy.
	He's wearing a black coat with a hood on.
	The fuck you're talking to, mate?
	I'm talking about you at all, mate.
	Fuck you better not be.
	Fucking spark you out.
	I'm not talking about you at all, mate.
	Yeah, yeah, Stephanie in.
	Are you serious?
	Smoke is bad for your health.
	It was just a joke.
	That was my fucking last cigarette, alright?
	That was fake.
	Get out of, brother.
	Yeah, some of these are fake.
	That's fake accent.
	And a lot of them are a fake accent.
	That's his English.
	Some of the hits are real.
	Here's how you know it's fake.
	The girls always say the same thing.
	Something, something, dickhead, blah, blah, blah.
	Asian wife.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	She's biased.
	They say bruv and dickhead.
	Yes, the one with the white t-shirt.
	She stood right next to me now.
	Like, who the fuck do you think you're talking to, bruv?
	What?
	What do you mean, what?
	Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?
	I don't fucking dickhead, bruv.
	Calm down.
	I'm not talking about you at all.
	Calm down.
	Cat shit get banged up.
	It's such a perfectly delivered slap.
	That was a waste of time.
	Let's take a call.
	Alrighty.
	Here we go.
	Eric.
	Eric.
	Hey.
	Oh, shit, that's me.
	It's you, Mike.
	Hey, question for Maddie.
	What's up?
	What was your favorite prison in New York State, and which other ones were you went to?
	I did most of my time in downstate.
	You know, maximum security and fish kill.
	What did you just ask after that caller?
	Yeah, Ryan, I can't hear the monitor.
	Yeah, you know, Governor Hokul's closing downstate.
	Governor?
	No, Governor Hobicol is closing downstate.
	I'll aim this.
	Oh, yeah, they're closing it.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I saw the well, they have Ulster, which was a reception, and Downstate's a reception, but you also have what they call a cadre.
	Yeah, so you're at Downstate for Cadre or as Reception?
	Cadre.
	Oh, you had a cake bid then.
	That's great.
	Were you incarcerated some?
	In the federal system, I was in, I went from local holding cells in Virginia.
	I was in Alexander City.
	Then I was in CVRJ, Central Virginia Regional Jail.
	I went from there.
	I went to the airlift in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.
	I went from there to Lewisburg.
	Oh, yeah.
	So we're all in Dockery at?
	That's it.
	I didn't do much time in the state.
	I did most of my time in feds.
	Oh, okay.
	Yeah.
	That's all.
	Thanks.
	Oh, wait, hold on.
	Gavin, what was your favorite bullpen?
	You only get one thing, I'm afraid.
	You're a caller.
	Oh.
	Can you do that Asian face or does that take a long time to set up?
	I have an Asian face.
	Does that count?
	Didn't take your dad long to set up.
	He just fucking banged a hairdresser and walked away.
	How dare you?
	You're not focused again.
	Okay, so number one, Rue.
	Wait, wait, wait.
	A, your tchotchkis are in focus, not you.
	Okay.
	B, can you get that guy, the Asian guy, the Snapchat guy?
	Oh, okay.
	Yeah.
	So, sir, we're going to get you your sneaker pimp.
	Yeah, you're going to really see me on my bullshit.
	Okay, I think this show is taking shape now.
	Thursdays is just going to be calls, super chats, letters.
	It's a town hall, a meeting with the public.
	And I guess I don't have to read these if they're appearing on the screen, right?
	You need to invest move to Surf City, North Carolina.
	You'll thank me later.
	Hold strong, John and Max.
	Cool.
	That's true.
	Do you know anything about Surf City?
	Surf City, North Carolina?
	Surf City?
	Was that like near the Outer Banks?
	I'm not a beach guy.
	Everyone's like, oh man, you got to come to Florida right near the beach.
	I'm going to Florida.
	Get Sunday.
	Dude, I was supposed to go this weekend.
	I'm going Sunday morning.
	Why?
	Just to get the fuck out of here for the snowstorm.
	You fucker.
	I'll be back Thursday.
	Where are you going to be?
	Miami Beach.
	Oh, yeah.
	I'm so retarded.
	I was like, I was going to go to Florida this weekend.
	We could have hung out.
	Yeah, I'll be in Orlando.
	You'll be in Miami Beach.
	We'll meet in the middle.
	I might, you know, I've rent a car and stuff like that, so I might just jump in a car and go see my buddy up in Tampa.
	It's about four hours from Miami Beach.
	North?
	It's northwest.
	It's on the Gulf Coast.
	But if you're there, let me know.
	I'll swing by.
	Is that near Orlando?
	I don't know Florida at all.
	It's about an hour and a half from Orlando.
	Okay.
	My son's there today.
	He left today.
	Oh, really?
	South Dayton.
	Well, he's got a place down there.
	And is that who you're going to hang out with him down there?
	No, no, no.
	I'm going to Miami Beach.
	South Pim.
	I won't pry.
	South Beach.
	Okay, ladies and gentlemen, time for what's it called?
	Oh, like a sneaker film.
	Okay.
	Smash and subscribe.
	How about that?
	Okay.
	So today we're going to look at different types of sneaker, okay?
	First of all, if you want to be super hot, obviously put on easy, put on something like a really, like a mountain boost.
	But if you're going to do something like go gym or something, get straight, get real big, you're going to have to smash the weight and you have to wear something flat on your feet.
	Otherwise, you're going to have back problem.
	So have to, you know, stay hot fire.
	Also responsible.
	Back together.
	Did you ever say smash the subscribe?
	Smash the subscribe.
	Yeah.
	Those eyebrows were like Nancy Pelosi's.
	Fucking.
	Boy, that Tucker Carlson joke about Michael Jackson is still alive, that fucking went viral.
	You know what we're talking about, Ryan?
	Oh, yeah, I do.
	I could pull that up.
	Matt, did you want me to show that picture?
	Yeah, you can show that.
	Yeah.
	Like, you can show the whole thing.
	Yeah, that last caller had a slight stolen valor vibe.
	Like, so, Matty, you're incarcerated, right?
	What was your favorite prisoner?
	Corrections and community supervision, downstate correctional facility, release identification.
	There's Mr. Odell on there in my greens.
	As a civilian, when I look at that ID and I see that picture, I'm like, yeah, that guy deserves to be aware of that.
	Well, he's got a little hologram there.
	Well, like, a couple weeks ago, the guy was like, yo, in your release in the New York State criminal investigation newsletter, you look terrifying in that fucking picture.
	I'm like, it's just a fucking picture.
	No, he's right.
	And that person looks like they belong in there, doesn't he?
	Well, I was impressed him.
	Like, as a taxpayer, I'm not like, free him.
	He was a passion on my side.
	What's tap?
	You could tap it for some different effects.
	You could put shades on the dude.
	My name's Rick James, bitch.
	I'm a real cool cat.
	I don't know what that guy is, but...
	Fine.
	You got to talk about a fine, foxy mama.
	You're an informant.
	I mean some real foxy things.
	Yeah, you're a CIA.
	He's like, nah, nah, man.
	You got to get away from me.
	I got too much heat.
	He's like, look, we're taking you in right now unless you tell us what happened with Fuzzy Bear.
	They ask him about purse, but he keeps coming back to like fine ladies.
	Well, I was hanging out with him, right?
	He was dumping some info on me.
	Then that was a different delivery coming in.
	So I said, ooh, what are you doing with that?
	And then this fox, I mean, she was a seven out of nine, came around and I said, hello, hello, knock, knock.
	I don't think a CI would be that.
	They're supposed to be reluctant to give the cops information.
	Yeah.
	He's not like, all right, the cops are here.
	All right, here's what's going down at the port on Thursday night.
	It's going to be crazy.
	I'm a ladies' man.
	Dear Gavin, Rygai and Maddie, I saw you talk about bare knuckle boxing yesterday on Compound Censored.
	A fun fact I figured you'd find interesting, if you didn't already know, is that when boxing switched from bare knuckle to gloves, deaths from boxing increased roughly 100 times.
	I'm not surprised.
	People hit harder when they have gloves on.
	Right.
	Because, you know, it's basic physics.
	So every action is equal and opposite reaction.
	So as hard as you're hitting someone's skull or face, it's the same pressure and force that's hitting your fucking hand.
	Well, that is probably why MMA people tend to be more mentally sound over years, although MMA is relatively new.
	I don't think you're going to get as many Muhammad Ali's from MMA.
	Well, they use a significantly smaller glove.
	They use a four-ounce glove.
	I mean, pros in boxing use eight-ounce gloves.
	Right.
	Like practice and stuff like that, they're 16-ounce gloves.
	But, you know, when you have padding on your hands and your hands are wrapped, you hit, you swing a lot and you intend to hit a lot harder because you feel that you have the protection of saving.
	Like people still break their hands in the gloves, even in boxing.
	But when you're bare knuckle fighting, like I've broke my hands and knuckles a gazillion times.
	Same thing with helmets, too.
	I remember this being.
	Yeah, we saw your link.
	But plus, this isn't your first rodeo.
	So when you're bare knuckle boxing, these bones have been broken, I assume, like dozens of times.
	Remember, Conor McGregor, when he broke his ankle, it's not like there was any kind of impact.
	It was just it was a jigsaw puzzle of fractures.
	So he had fractured it in training up to the fight.
	And then, you know, when he stepped back and put weight on it, because obviously you're planting your feet to create power and force to hit somebody, it just snapped.
	Like, you know, you're training, you're going hard in training.
	So you're...
	Yeah, but that's what I'm saying.
	He had a million little tiny fractures.
	Right.
	Gavin, are you still friends with Faith Goldie?
	She's 8.1.
	She got married.
	She has a kid.
	And yeah, I'm still friends with her.
	She's a wonderful human being.
	But you got to understand, Toronto is fucking pariah central when it comes to all this right-wing shit.
	Like, my brother was with her at a bar in Toronto.
	And One person recognized her and said, Oh my God, there's a racist here.
	That there's a racist.
	And he started going over to the bartender.
	They were all immediately kicked out, by the way.
	No questions asked.
	But the craziest part of this was: some woman who didn't recognize faith heard that there's a racist in the bar.
	She collapsed.
	This sounds like a lie, but until you've hung out with like liberal Torontonians and Westchesterians, you don't understand their level of fucking insane paranoia.
	She goes, what?
	Where?
	What?
	No.
	She collapses on the ground and starts convulsing.
	Not because there's a racist there per se, but because someone said there was.
	This isn't faith.
	This is, you understand what I'm saying?
	Yeah, yeah.
	A random stranger.
	Like, have you seen that viral video?
	It had a rebirth recently where someone's filming this woman.
	She's like, she's filming me.
	And she's on the ground.
	And the woman's like, just get the fuck away from me.
	Like, stop filming me.
	And she keeps falling.
	And that was what this woman was doing because faith was there.
	Sounds like Chrissy.
	Yeah.
	The reason is you aren't wearing gloves.
	You can easily hear her break your hand.
	Oh, we already solved that.
	Bare knuckle boxers had to focus more on punches to the body.
	Oh, God.
	Body shots are underrated.
	But once gloves were introduced, the quantity and intensity of punches.
	Yeah, that's why I don't wear a seatbelt.
	People think I'm fucking nuts.
	When seatbelts came out, accidents went down, but fatal accidents actually went up because people felt invincible.
	What is this?
	Pasta, us, again, process, about.
	Oh, I see what they're doing.
	Puabu?
	They're testing.
	No, they're testing your Canadian-ness.
	Oh, okay.
	Pasta, us.
	Pasta, us, again, process, about.
	I think I've pretty much lost my Canadian accent.
	No, that's very...
	It's pasta.
	I know us is bad.
	I consciously say us.
	You should also add buried there.
	But I consciously say buried, just because I, not because I don't want to be known as Canadian, but when you say buried, people go, what?
	And then it slows down whatever you're talking about.
	So I say buried.
	I think my about is pretty normal.
	Yeah, but the process.
	You say process.
	Process.
	I don't feel...
	Okay, I'll try to say process.
	No, don't change.
	Again.
	What do you say?
	Again?
	Again.
	Again.
	Oh, we say again, I guess?
	Yeah.
	Uz took, it was a long time.
	It took me to stop saying us.
	And my kids go nuts when I say pasta.
	Dr. Zeus, you'll say us.
	But pasta has two A's.
	Same with NASA.
	I used to get for NASA.
	They're like, NASA?
	Yeah, it's two A's.
	You guys are all NASA.
	And they also make fun of me when I say Mario.
	It's an A. Mario.
	Dr. Zeus is my favorite.
	What do you guys say?
	It's not a consonant and not a vowel.
	It's usually like the not predominant A would be ah.
	That's true.
	Oh, wait.
	Yeah, yeah.
	So 50 bucks here for this gentleman.
	Sending this vlog down because I missed out on the doodles for charity.
	Fatherless Son is pretty trippy, man.
	Much love, Gav, Maddie, and Ryan.
	Please keep crushing.
	Fatherless Son is pretty trippy.
	What's he talking about?
	I don't know.
	Did we say that it should be a band name?
	Oh, this is a good question.
	What is the minimum age to watch a show?
	Oh, that's a good question.
	You talk about pussy a lot and fucking...
	I'm going to go with 13.
	Yeah.
	But, like, hide it.
	Isn't he 13?
	That's about right.
	Like, I was thinking about the pressure.
	I mean, I'm Scottish, though.
	Like, I think a 13-year-old should drink.
	A 13-year-old boy should drink a beer.
	13-year-old boy.
	Porn is a lot for a 13-year-old.
	They shouldn't watch porn.
	We don't show porn on the show, but we talk about tits and constant stuff.
	I think 13 is a very mature 13-year-old.
	But the whole sexual attitude in Scotland and stuff like that, it's kind of just like it is what it is.
	The page 3 girl and the sun and stuff like that is naked on every page 3.
	Yeah, your dad has the paper, the sun, and he leaves it open.
	There's a woman with her tits out, and you see that when you're one.
	Yeah, the sun.
	And for years, he had like BBC1, BBC Two, what was it, Channel 3 or whatever.
	And there was no.
	So there was nudity and cursing and everything just on regular television.
	Yeah.
	Like there was no...
	Like, I can remember one time my mother was doing a joke and stuff like that.
	And it was mostly American couples and stuff like that.
	And she had to, like, she wanted to grab someone's crotch.
	And in Scotland, that wouldn't have been like a big...
	Like, you could have went up to any man in the room, no matter whose husband it was or whatever.
	And we're like, okay, this is it.
	And you grab his cry, and it would have been like.
	And it was like the punchline of the joke.
	And then he came along and said, here's your nods.
	But over there, my mother was like, she didn't know whose crotch.
	It was fucking hilarious.
	Because I seen her struggling with it.
	I was like, oh, God, it's not going to translate well at all.
	They tried to ruin Trump for wanting to do that.
	Oh, yeah.
	If you remember, the tenants' laggard cans would have naked women on them.
	Yeah.
	Like, not naked with their cunts, but they'd be like, their shirts would be undone.
	Their tits would be hanging out.
	Yeah.
	It's just a totally different.
	They're just funnier, really.
	Yeah.
	I remember I was at the pub in Lead Hills, and there was when you would buy a pint, they had a little guy that you could put money in, like in his head for the poor.
	He was like, give a pound coin to Scotland's poor children.
	And it was a little boy who had like a cane and he was like, thanks.
	Made of plastic, you know what I mean?
	Like a piggy bank.
	And someone had made a Hitler mustache on him and then with a marker made a whole Nazi uniform with a swastika and everything.
	So you're putting money into Hitler's head every time you want to donate.
	I remember we used to have this fucking one thing, kind of like that.
	I don't know why the fuck we, you would put money in it and the fucking kid would, he was holding his dick.
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	And he'd fucking pee.
	Yeah, yeah.
	It's like, what?
	So romantic for pedophiles.
	Oh, yeah.
	I remember we had a milk content back in the day, right?
	But my family, we weren't too well off.
	So the milkman would come like every other, like, three weeks.
	And there was like a missing kid on there.
	We said, oh my god, like where'd that missing kid go, right?
	And we're walking around town, we see a guy, and it's him, but he's like 30 years old.
	We had this milk sitting around for a long time.
	Could have used your ice cream soup from milk.
	Yeah, we could use ice cream soup.
	Hey, Jesse, did you ever have city water?
	Oh, yeah, city water.
	But here's the thing, we didn't have sugar.
	So we would take like little scrumptious berries from grown on the trees for us, right?
	You build a tree for it out of cardboard.
	And then so when you go up the ladder, it's just a ladder.
	And you see little berries there.
	You squish the berries, put it in the water.
	What is city water, though?
	A city water is usually like you take domino sugar and water and you just mix it up.
	But if you can't afford it, you can go to Dunkin' Donuts and you can get little packets.
	But we didn't have that either.
	So you were pretty poor?
	Well, we were resourceful.
	Lots of fluoride.
	Lots of fluoride.
	That's why my teas look so amazing.
	Lots of fluoride in the water over there in the city.
	That's right.
	Oh, this guy's paying $100 for this.
	Whoa.
	High roller.
	A cool guy and Gavin thought this would be interesting.
	A Canadian journalist named John Ibbotson.
	I knew a gay dude named David Ibbotson at the Earl of March High School where I went to high school.
	And he was clearly gay.
	All his friends were girls.
	No one gave a shit.
	We didn't know what gay was really when you were a teenager back then.
	But you were like, that guy seems fruity.
	It's not like you think of him going like, oh, but you're like, he's not normal like us.
	But it was like being an albino or having Down syndrome or, you know, being Muslim or something.
	You're just like, you're different.
	Yeah.
	And no one fucking cared.
	It wasn't like we're going to beat him up.
	And then he killed himself.
	Yeah.
	It's the easy way out.
	Anyway, John Ibbotson believes that Canada may have to step in militarily to prevent the U.S. from falling off a cliff and into the abyss.
	Here's a link to some commentary on it because I'm too cheap to pay for the subscription to the original article found here.
	Canada's going to come save America's ass?
	No.
	Like Canada doesn't have its own problems?
	Is Canada kicking ass with Justin Trudeau saying that if you're against the vaccine, you're racist and sexist?
	This is the prime minister of the country saying that.
	Damn.
	That president reveals hurling toward possible violence?
	No, no.
	Oh, wait.
	He's saying if Trump or DeSantis wins, we're going to have to go in and save the day?
	Wow.
	Okay.
	Yeah, all right.
	Save us from fucking Trump.
	They're going to have to throw balls across the border.
	Maddie is the greatest thing to happen to the show recently.
	Hot shit.
	Hot shit.
	Hot shit.
	It's my birthday.
	I hope Gary isn't dead.
	True.
	We all hope.
	We all pray.
	This guy, 25 minutes.
	Darkquarius.
	Hey, Gav, I'm a few years younger than you, but I'm trying to follow your example in regards to growing older.
	So how do I shit my pants gracefully in public?
	You have a top hat on and a monocle, and you go, top of the morning to you, gentlemen.
	And the rest of the day to yourself.
	I am working a double tomorrow, so I'd like to try it.
	Don't want it to catch me off guard one day.
	I don't know.
	You politely say, excuse me.
	I mean, where is he working?
	There's no bathroom?
	Yeah, every time I shit my pants, everyone is very interested.
	I'm usually around dudes.
	I'm like, shit my pants, shit my pants.
	Oh, I'm fucking...
	The last time I think I shit my pants, I was in a car.
	I was driving down, going towards the duck, and I had somebody in the car with me.
	And I fucking farted, and I was like, oh, shit.
	I just had a fucking...
	It went through my pants, through my underwear, and left a wet stain on the scene.
	I took a picture of it, and I called my cousin Miles.
	I was like, yo, dude, I just shit myself in the car.
	He was fucking dying.
	Fucking dying.
	Yeah, you got to go home.
	You turn around.
	Yeah, I dropped the guy off at our local, and I said, I'll be back.
	I did that one time on a motorcycle.
	That was no fun.
	No bueno.
	I've never really been inconvenienced by it.
	I was coming down from Boston on 95.
	I had just come out of Rhode Island into Connecticut.
	And usually I stop at exit 93 or 90 something.
	Like there's a little gas station there.
	And boy, the bubble guts came.
	It was like that horse when you had to throw up.
	You thought you were going to beat it back?
	Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	No.
	Hold on, hold on.
	The door was open and the horses were running.
	Oh, that's the worst when you're having shit cramps.
	Or like you're on a plane and it's about to take off or it's landing and you know, you can't get up to use the bathroom.
	I was once in a plane where I was pushing my elbows to get my ass off the seat and going, because it's coming in bathroom.
	I'm like, what are they going to do?
	Fucking drag me to my seat?
	But I've never had a problem with it as far as like, you shit your pants, whether you're at work or at home or even at a shopping mall.
	You go into the stall, you take your underwear off, you wipe what's left with what's left of your underwear.
	Socks, cut t-shirts?
	No, no, the underwear.
	You can fold it such that the shit, and it's not going to be a log, it's usually like a little squirt of yellow shit.
	But I find I can use the underwear, the non-used parts, to clean the rest of my ass, throw that in the garbage, and then take the toilet paper, make a big ball, dip it in the toilet, and then wash my ass there.
	Do you ever do that?
	Use toilet water to wash your ass?
	When I was on the bike, I was on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere.
	There was like a little stream, a little bit of water on the...
	Oh, that was a lucky break.
	I had to hide behind my bike, take my pants off, soak my pants in the fucking water to clean them out.
	And then cut my t-shirt to dry myself.
	Oh, it was a fucking disaster.
	So wait, a disaster.
	Are you wearing a half T as you get back on your bike?
	Like the bottom, like, you know, socks.
	It was just like, oh my God.
	It was such a panic state.
	Like, I was standing up on the bike, clinching my ass.
	Like, I'm like, this is not happening.
	And it happened.
	And it was just.
	I don't mind that.
	pants felt her right i went just like this she's got to get on the escalator because water uh dear g Queen and Fag Daddy, I was catching up on my missed shows from December.
	During an episode, you and Maddie were discussing ghosts.
	Oh, wait, we've already discussed this, haven't we?
	Yeah, yeah, we already showed that.
	I got to remember to put flags on things we've already discussed.
	What was that Friday show?
	Gavin, when you said there'd be broads on the Friday show, I thought you were bringing in porn stars.
	That was because I saw you had been on Compound and had that one guest.
	But then those hideous creatures at your and Ryan's desks, and we got the duck.
	Ew, next time we'll ban you and Ryan.
	We don't want to see those bitches anymore, blah, blah, blah.
	I think that's kind of sexist.
	That is sexist.
	What we were trying to do was what Barstool Sports does, where they bring in chicks.
	And Isabella Reilly and Isabella DeLuca were unavailable.
	So we got women that were, I'd say, as attractive or slightly less.
	Spicer in Cincinnati is the coolest guy ever.
	We were best friends and hang out all the time.
	He also has doubles of all the muscle cars, triples of the Barracuda, the Roadrunner, and the Nova.
	There we said it.
	Damn, damn.
	Kevin, I like your take on tattoos.
	Would you do a definitive green screen on your tattoos complete with backstory or lack of artist date and pain level?
	Maybe throw Maddie and Rye guys in there too?
	That's not a bad idea if we all do it.
	I've had a few.
	I've had a few.
	Dude, that would be like a two-hour show.
	If you broke down every single one of your tattoos.
	Damn.
	Do you have any on your legs?
	Yeah.
	I got both calves and one side of the calf.
	What's down there?
	I have a Pearl Jam stick figure.
	I have a friend of mine drew a thing on a bar coaster, so I had that done.
	A good friend of mine, Paula.
	And then I have a naked Mexican lady on my outside.
	And then, you know, I've got my back done, my chest, my stomach, my ribs, both arms.
	Sound like a piece of trash.
	Yeah, you know.
	I'm a single father with five child.
	Do you think there's any point to be getting married again?
	Or should I continue to date around until I'm super old and die alone?
	Please say Elijah's hair smells like pea.
	I've never smelled Elijah's hair.
	You have five children, dude?
	I mean, you want to get those kids a mom.
	I would keep trying to date.
	Well, do they live with him?
	I guess the older ones.
	Oh, but you wouldn't say I'm a single father if there was a mom in the picture, would you?
	Uh-oh, someone wants to bone you, Maddie.
	Ooh.
	Is Maddie single?
	Asking for a friend.
	Who's that?
	Okay.
	You know, I...
	As a matter of fact, I am.
	If it's okay, I know who this is.
	She's on Twitter.
	Maybe I should pull up a picture.
	She's not a private person.
	Okay.
	Ah, Ab.
	Okay, Maddie.
	I don't want this to sound offensive, but as Maddie's friend, I don't want him to get hurt.
	Before we take this any farther, Danielle, we need to see a picture of your cunt.
	That's very Louis C.K. is.
	We're going to need to see a picture of your cunt.
	We're going to need to see your cunt.
	If I don't see the cunt, then it's not real.
	Okay.
	Sold, that's a yes.
	We're in.
	Yeah, yeah.
	But we're blocking out a pretty important feature here.
	Oh, she's stacked.
	Nice.
	I like that first picture better.
	Great stuff.
	Sold.
	Let's take a call.
	Oh, she's asking for a friend.
	Yeah, that's true.
	Maybe her friend left hit and right tair tomorrow.
	Hey.
	Those are two tails.
	If you're local, let me know.
	If you're local, let me know.
	Yeah, you're crazy.
	Okay.
	312, you're on the line.
	What's up, Gab?
	What's up, Maddie?
	Hey, man.
	What's going on?
	What am I fucking chopped shit?
	Yes.
	Oh.
	Right.
	Well, that's.
	I wanted to ask, what's going to happen when this shrimp inevitably dies from Ryan's ineptitude?
	How dare you?
	We're going to get cocktail sushi.
	I'm going to shrug.
	I'm going to shrug and buy another one.
	As a Japanese person, my heart goes out to aquatic life of all sorts.
	Really?
	Creators of sushi.
	Yeah.
	All you guys do is eat them.
	Don't you, like, also just take a shark's dorsal fin and leave it to die?
	Yeah, shark's soup.
	All right, I'll be honest.
	The real reason is I don't want to be tempted every day to slaughter and cause pain towards the creature.
	And I know that I would fail at that.
	I would flense it.
	You ever see a fucking whale flendsing?
	It's the most brutal thing.
	I've never heard that term before.
	I don't know what you're talking about.
	Flendsing?
	Flendsing.
	Is that when you clean out their anal glands?
	That's like when you break down a fish, when you butcher a fish, but for a whale.
	A whale can get butchered by the Japanese.
	The whale man.
	The white whale.
	You would be appalled by the amount of diversity in modern society.
	Notice the white whale doesn't commit violence like the black whale, shamu.
	You gotta work on your Jared Taylor, dude.
	He's doing Jared Taylor so badly, I have to say he's doing Jared Taylor.
	It's literally called a killer whale.
	Have a great night, boys.
	Bye.
	Yeah, we forgot to hang up on him.
	Hey, Gavron and Maddie, love the show.
	Could use some advice right about now.
	Right about now.
	After the birth of our son, my wife went a little bat shit crazy, which I expected.
	But now, 14 months later, after the birth of our son, and constant ER visits, it was apparent she had OCD and health anxiety.
	I've tried to be supportive by finding her a therapist, rearranging my work schedule, getting grandparents more involved, but nothing seems to help calm her nerves, and she always finds something to complain about.
	After listening to her complain about being home with her son and how it's not as mentally satisfying as working, what was her job?
	Solving Rubik's Cubes?
	I almost lost my shit.
	It's not even the ER visits that bother me.
	It's her saying she didn't think being a mother was going to be this difficult.
	Wait, it can't be difficult and not mentally satisfying at the same time.
	What's more mentally satisfying than something difficult?
	Well, at 14 months, it's relatively young in the experience.
	I mean, I can remember times as an infant, my son would uncontrollably cry, and it would be mentally taxing for both my wife and I. Like, you know, he would scream throughout the, like, I remember one time I was living in a house with my in-laws.
	It was a two-family house.
	I rented the top floor.
	They lived on the first floor.
	And our son was in the bassinet at the bottom of the bed.
	And both of us were sound asleep, unconscious.
	And my mother-in-law hears him screaming from upstairs.
	She comes upstairs, and she picks him up out of the bassinet, and she turns the light on and starts scolding.
	Like, you don't hear, like, we were unconscious.
	Like, just from the routine.
	There was no booze involved?
	No.
	It was.
	It was just the constant abuse.
	Oh.
	Listen, I understand.
	And, you know, I was the breadwinner, so I had to go out and make the living and everything.
	She was home with a child.
	Like, I'm fortunate she never complained or, you know, said, I can't do this, but I, you know, because I would work, come home and take over, and she would get her some time off.
	But once you get through all the feed it every four hours and all that, like the first 24 months until like the child starts to have this personality and can function, like you're relating to the child.
	You're not just caring for a bundle of joy.
	Yeah, good point.
	It becomes more.
	Right.
	It's just a screaming thing at the beginning.
	You don't know.
	You're trying to figure out what's wrong.
	I'm remembering it all.
	Once it recognizes you and goes, oh, it's like sees mama.
	Like 14 months in, that's...
	14 months is a long time.
	It is, but it is.
	Why does it recognize you?
	I keep forgetting, and I'm saying it because we're talking about males and females.
	The first couple of months, they don't see anything but what?
	Red, black, in a couple of colors, and then, you know, all the...
	Well, they say that babies are born a trimester early because their heads are too big.
	And like a horse comes out and walks down the street.
	Ours come out and it needs another term before it's like a person.
	At what age did you start having like cognitive memories?
	I think I don't remember.
	Five?
	Yeah, five.
	I have like a fucking pube of England and we left when I was turning five.
	Right.
	I hear stories of like I was in France when I was like five.
	Like, you know, because my mother and father would go back and forth to Scotland and England.
	So he would bring, my father would bring his sisters and brother and they would go to Europe.
	They'd go through France, England, Ireland.
	They would do the whole thing.
	And there's pictures of me there.
	I don't remember a fucking thing of that.
	No.
	And how old was that?
	I'd say between three and five.
	Yeah, they say you got to empty your hard drive.
	Like my first passport, my mother, you can see her hands holding my torso in the picture.
	It's not even the ER visits that bother me.
	It's her saying that she didn't think being a mother was going to be so difficult.
	In the same breath, saying it's not rewarding.
	What do I do?
	How can I straighten this situation out without kicking her ass to the curb?
	P.S. I work over in Yonkers in Manhattan as a video technician.
	If you have a send that over to fucking Rye Guy.
	Hello.
	I mean, you have to communicate.
	You got to ask her what's what's not like what where are you feeling shorted?
	Like, why aren't you enjoying our child?
	Why aren't you, what turns you off from being a mother?
	What?
	Maybe discipline is in order.
	I don't mean slapping her around.
	I don't know how old she is.
	For fuck's sakes.
	I mean, come on.
	Is she 25?
	Is she 30?
	Maybe not placating her would be the solution.
	And not going to ER for her panic attacks.
	Saying, you've got to figure this out.
	Give her C-bands.
	This is around the time, up to two months.
	Yeah, this is 14.
	So they'll recognize images and shapes and the sound of your voice and stuff like that.
	She smiles when she sees me and my wife.
	So it's pretty cool.
	Definitely.
	So she'll look at us and if we smile, she smiles.
	Oh, really?
	And if we, yeah, there's around the age they could recognize facial patterns and things like that.
	You know what would be a funny prank, Maddie?
	If we find a baby that's like multiracial Asian and the same age and we go by and we switch them out, I would notice right away.
	And then they're like, I don't know what's going on.
	And then we switch it back.
	It's like a zebra.
	That wouldn't be cool at all.
	That would be hilarious.
	All right, let's take a call.
	We only got 20 minutes left.
	I don't think we helped that guy, but Jesus Christ, who the fuck are we?
	Just communicate between each other.
	Matt.
	If she's feeling stressed, you know, take over.
	Let her have a break.
	Let Rover take over.
	I will say, when my neighbor started attacking my kids, my wife had a nervous breakdown, and it could have ruined our marriage.
	She went away to a retreat in Canyon-something in Arizona and came, she was gone for like 10 days, maybe two weeks, getting up at dawn, going on hikes.
	And I'm sure the poor equivalent of this is like your mother-in-law's farm or whatever, you know, any relative that has a rural thing.
	And we didn't nag her and call her.
	I don't think she FaceTimed once.
	I had the kids.
	She came back a fucking rock, unshakable.
	You could shoot her.
	She'd Matrix out of the way.
	Like she's 100% cured.
	So I guess that's my answer is you take the baby.
	14 months, you're probably not breastfeeding anymore.
	So you take the baby.
	I know you work.
	Figure that out.
	I don't know.
	Have someone come by.
	You can bring her here.
	And give her like a break.
	I bet you could do as little as a week, maybe even five days.
	And she can just like sleep in, be lazy.
	You know, when you're working out and you have to do 15 of these and you're like, I'm going to fucking die.
	And then you give yourself even like three seconds, one, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand.
	That gives you like enough for three or four more.
	You don't need to stop and take a one minute break.
	Just the tiniest breather sort of, I think it tells your brain that there's an escape.
	There's there's an out.
	And what really freaks you out is that what really freaks you out is you think there's no break here.
	At least that's the way my brain works, and clearly it's the way my wife's brain works.
	When we were in a sweat lodge when I was courting her, they said, we're going to open the doors to the sweat lodge when we're done a song.
	And as a white man, I feel like if we know that there's a break coming, we can survive anything.
	But their fucking stupid songs are, hi, no, ho, yo, hi, ho, hi, you know.
	Did you jump in water right away when you came out?
	No, we walked in snow barefoot.
	There was no water around, but it was freezing cold.
	And it was heaven, the cold.
	They do that in federal.
	You get the Native Americans in federal prison, they do the foot lodge.
	You should just say you're Native.
	Dave, didn't you say that?
	Yeah, I changed my religion in federal prison.
	So I could wear a bandana around my head when I jog.
	Religious headgear.
	Because, you know, the Rastafarians had their big popcorn hat, chief pop hat.
	And then like, you know, Jews had their yellow and stuff like that.
	You know, the Muslims had their Kufis.
	So the Native Americans, they get to wear a bandana.
	So when I started running when I was, you know, I was a young man at the time and I would run and run five miles three times a week.
	And so I wanted a bandana, so I had to go to the chapel and change my religion from Roman Catholic to fucking Native American.
	And is that the only thing about you that was Native American?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	Yeah.
	I mean, you were allowed to get like a peace pipe, a medicine bag.
	They would give you non-nicotine tobacco because in the feds at the time, I went in in 2004.
	In 2005, they stopped smoking across the whole, the FBOP, the Federal Bureau of Prisons.
	So the Indians would get no nicotine tobacco for their ceremonies and stuff like that.
	But that became the biggest contraband on compounds.
	Someone's asking to hear the dehydrated daddy story.
	So my buddy Shane upstate, he's got lots and lots of kids, like from different women and taking and adopting kids.
	Is someone on the line?
	Yeah.
	Who?
	I think his name's Matt.
	What's up, Matt?
	Hey, Matt.
	Hey, what's up?
	I need you to do a censored presents watching the 355, and if you don't, I'm canceling my subscription.
	355.
	Oh, shit.
	We better get to work.
	What's the 355?
	Oh, is that that story about the corrupt cops?
	It's badass chicks saving the world.
	Oh, shit.
	Yeah, I heard about this.
	Okay, thanks for calling.
	It's this retarded fucking movie.
	What is it?
	The 355?
	Yeah, 35ths rule.
	Is that no, Ryan?
	That's not the three-fifths rule.
	Because they didn't want the world to know her real name.
	That's Richie Cunningham's daughter.
	Really?
	Miss Howard.
	Oh, shit!
	Ow!
	Who?
	The proud boys?
	Wait, no, that's not the daughter.
	Oh, she looks just like her now.
	I can't believe we're gonna have to beat up 30 cops.
	I'll handle the guns.
	Are you in therapy?
	I should be.
	You're the best in the world at what you do.
	You're the best in the world at what you do.
	Babbling?
	What?
	Be black?
	The target is on the move.
	You're not going in there alone.
	We'll go together.
	I have a family.
	I cannot do this anymore.
	The bad guys are out there right now.
	You go home.
	You bring them with you.
	Are you under control?
	Are you?
	No.
	Black cars.
	Black cars.
	Everything.
	Black bitches out on the street.
	I counted six, but thanks for the tip.
	Okay, you know what all of this shit is?
	I've had enough.
	Nerds who have never fucked women or fucked one woman, the fat chick from their chemistry class, they see girls as this daunting magical force.
	And they're like, what the fuck is that?
	It's just like Tomb Raider.
	Like that we see a pretty girl and we're like, wow, what a hot chick.
	She'll never fuck me.
	I'm old.
	But man, I would have had her one day.
	Anyway, bye.
	They see a hot chick and they're like, they're looking at a fucking monster, right?
	And they also, they feel the same way about violence.
	Like, fighting is like the craziest, most magical, weird thing ever.
	It's something they'll never understand or be a part of.
	So they combine these two crazy things.
	Women and their incredible power and fighting and its unfathomable mystery.
	And they combine them.
	Sex and pistols.
	Sex and pistols.
	And normal men are just going, oh, for fuck's sakes.
	Like Nick DiPaulo going, I don't think my suspension of disbelief can take Charles Lee the Ron beating up 13 Russian mobsters anymore.
	I'm done with movies.
	But nerds and beta males and young Gen Zs are like, yeah, all my shit together.
	Fantasy.
	I'm like watching Raiders of the Lost Dark, the scene where the guy's face melts.
	Like I'm right in the eye of the storm.
	It's not normal.
	How could they complain about being underestimated, but at the same time, that's like the basis for their tactics?
	They're like, they walk in with a dress.
	It's like, it works to their advantage.
	You know what would be funny if we did a movie like that, but it was realistic.
	So there's these agents that show up in like these gowns, and then they go up to the Russian guy to steal his papers.
	And she's like, oops, sorry, I tripped.
	And then she goes to grab the papers.
	She goes, what are you doing?
	She goes, ah!
	And her nose just starts bleeding.
	Lisa, are you okay?
	Picks her up and slams her on her head.
	Call the police.
	You just punched her.
	You didn't encrypt the radio that you used.
	You know that?
	I don't know.
	That's what would happen.
	Fuck you.
	Somebody, yeah, we're getting a lot of people saying, why are we supporting Getter?
	Because they banned.
	Oh, yeah, because they banned Nick Fundez.
	And they banned our boy over here.
	What's his name?
	Fucking John Miller.
	John Miller.
	Well, John Miller had nigger in his profile, and they don't like the word nick.
	They banned that word.
	That's a pain.
	Should I not cut on Getter because they did that?
	I tried Gab.
	I didn't like it.
	I couldn't figure it out.
	Sorry.
	I think it's a good place in the meantime until we find a place that does let us use the M-word.
	Yeah, but like if I until we find, that's our goal.
	We want to find a place where we can just say nigger.
	It rhymes with getter, but it starts with a different letter.
	Yeah, we're starting a new social media platform called nigger.
	But there's no E at the end of the day.
	It's not nigger free, but it is free niggers.
	But if I boycotted everything that banned Nick Fuentes, I'd have to ban planes.
	Is that the best retaliation?
	He's on the no-files?
	Yeah.
	So should we, I don't know.
	I think it's a good way to get my message across.
	I like my message.
	I don't find it to be selling out.
	At least because it's the only thing I'm allowed on.
	Yeah.
	I don't think Nick would want me to if he called me crying and said, dude, you got to do this.
	Actually, let's talk to him right now.
	I think he is on the line.
	Okay, good.
	He's been waiting for a while.
	He's been waiting for a whale of a time.
	Waiting for a whale.
	Yeah, I couldn't show that footage.
	It was actually very, very brutal.
	There's something about a whale.
	Not if you don't give a fuck about whales.
	No, dude.
	I think you'd chop them up.
	You would see it and you'd say, that's a bit rich.
	No, when are you cutting it into the future?
	Show me the fucking whale.
	You want to see it?
	Yeah.
	All right.
	All right.
	You've asked me.
	Like I had a hot dog for dinner and a cheeseburger for lunch.
	That's a cow getting slaughtered.
	You're going to puke dash eat up when you see it.
	So you see whales as above cows and mantis shrimp are above flies.
	I don't think I'd like to see a cow having this done to them.
	Well, you should if you eat them.
	You're morally obligated to see what they're doing.
	I just don't want to see how the sausage is made.
	You got to see how the sausage is made.
	The only time you don't see the sausage being made is when your wife is putting on lingerie.
	Ah.
	Yay.
	Oh, God.
	Thanks for the warning, Rye Guy.
	Dismantling of a whale.
	Oh god.
	They cut a dead whale open.
	You're a fucking pussy.
	I could watch cataract surgery.
	No problems.
	Where they take the little tool and they go inside.
	I'm not worried about the eye, per se.
	Like, what's your problem with this?
	Wait till it gets bloody.
	Oh, no.
	Blood.
	First of all, it's not like it gets too bloody because it's already dead.
	The heart's not beating.
	So it's not like blood's going to be squirting out everywhere.
	It's just resisting blood that's in the body.
	100% collected.
	It's exactly what I imagined taking apart a whale look like.
	What?
	That part's softcore.
	Now they get to this stuff.
	Ouch.
	Oh, no.
	Ouch.
	Ouch.
	Ouch.
	You should come hunting.
	I would go hunting.
	Yeah, when you shoot the deer, what do you think you got to do?
	You got to break her down.
	Exactly.
	No, I've seen that happen.
	My friend Nick DeVino's dad owned a restaurant.
	I don't understand what you're talking about.
	What about this is freaky?
	I don't know.
	It's getting bloody.
	It looks too gross.
	Gross?
	There's very minimal blood because it's dead.
	Yeah.
	It's like the least gross animal preparation I've ever seen.
	You sure you're ready?
	Are you kidding?
	Really?
	Hey, Gavin, Maddie, and Rye Guy.
	I've been enjoying your men porn segments, and I want to introduce to you the feminist version.
	There's a recent YouTube trend of women in their mid-30s showcasing their independence and autonomy.
	By the way, this is called feminist porn.
	Behold the ideal modern feminists, former NFL cheerleader, now living out of a Prius in her mid-30s, alone, childless, raising a dog.
	And I'm like, oh my gosh.
	Always presenting a smile to the camera.
	You can see the emptiness and desperation to appear happy to others.
	He's like, you can't sleep here.
	And as the comments are pointing out, notice how independent and free she is.
	Oh, it's an interesting twist on the male porn we watch.
	Seeing feminists destroy themselves.
	I am a car dweller or van lifer, right?
	There's like four things that have to happen to be like officially initiated.
	Maybe you go a few days on end without a shower.
	You eat a meal with a fork you got off the floor that you never washed.
	Somebody tried to give you their spare change.
	All these have happened.
	And finally, the knock.
	Wow, that was crazy.
	So needless to say, we left Walmart and we're going to avoid that security guard at all costs.
	So now Cracker Barrel is here to save the day.
	Love Cracker Barrel.
	All right, we're going to try this again.
	After setting up yet again, it was finally time to go to bed.
	Stay tuned for next week as we accidentally end up in some amazing places and some pretty sticky situations.
	Thanks for watching.
	Don't forget to like, comment, subscribe, share with your friends.
	Is this kind of fake though?
	There's one other chick who does shit like that.
	It's called Unstoppable Morgan.
	She lives in like a Ford Bronco.
	Like she goes, she's a severe alcoholic and she tries to stay off the wagon, but always falls off and fucks up.
	They do this by choice.
	They're making...
	Yeah, if she's making like $40,000 to $50,000 a month off YouTube.
	Fuck off.
	You're not homeless.
	You're not poor.
	They're not making that much.
	With 160,000 subscribers, it's not that much at all.
	Well, she's making money.
	If I had a video that made 13 million, had 13 million hits, and it made like 30 grand.
	So how much of her videos?
	That's unstoppable Morgan.
	41,000.
	She makes tons of money off this fucking shit.
	And it's just like the biggest pity party.
	But if I was single, I'd just be like, you can stay at my house.
	Oh, she stops every now and then and does a couple, some work on our trucks and, you know.
	Gets banged.
	And then she fucking, I got to run.
	You know, she runs from everything.
	She's a runner.
	Joe Aloya, when are we going to see Michael Mouse and Gavin McInnis spelled wrong debate?
	I don't like Michael Mouse.
	He talks shit about me.
	I helped discover him.
	I was always nothing but nice to him.
	And then I found out he's been constantly talking shit about me.
	This is before I allegedly shoved him.
	Okay, I shoved him.
	That's why I shoved him.
	Because I was like, fuck you, dude.
	I've been nothing but cool to you, and you're talking shit all the time.
	So he's dead to me.
	Are you going to have Tommy on?
	Yeah.
	He has a doc coming on the 29th.
	Yes, we should definitely get to that.
	And I keep saying all these journalists who constantly, obsessively monitor the Proud Boys and make spreadsheets about what they did on Thursday and what they ate.
	And then you look at Tommy Robinson and he's making spreadsheets on all the different groomers and who they've raped and what are the patterns here and who are the leaders and who are the soldiers.
	I mean, he has the whole structure of these grooming gangs mapped out.
	This is an amateur journalist who's just figuring it out as he goes along and he's preventing children from being raped.
	And what are you guys doing?
	I think someone was friends with someone who was talking about possibly being at the insurrection.
	Okay.
	Good work.
	Here's someone who's anti-mandate.
	Okay.
	Wonderful.
	This is a pretty good either or.
	What's more gay?
	Dreading to have to do a prostate exam but ending up loving it?
	Or really looking forward to a prostate exam but ending up hating it?
	Hmm.
	I guess the second one's more gay.
	Yeah.
	You're allowed to have nerve endings in your butthole.
	I mean, what guy hasn't had a girl suck his dick and stick her finger up your head?
	I don't mind it.
	What kind of amateurs are out there?
	It's not the kind of thing your wife does.
	No, I mean, married women are not anal players.
	There has to be at least a few girls who blew you and stuck her finger up your head.
	Oh, yeah.
	I remember one time when I lived in Greenpoint.
	Brooklyn.
	This girl was sucking me off, and then she goes, licks the balls.
	Okay, great.
	Then she goes south of the balls and starts eating my ass like I'm a chick.
	And I'm like, oh, maybe if I'd had a warning, I could have got some Clorox bleaches Down there, but I don't know if you want to go there.
	We love it.
	Hey, dudes, I'm 24.
	Generally, don't see a future in this country.
	Straight white men, especially straight white libertarian man, are being demonized more and more each and every day.
	I don't want to raise my future children in a country that despises them.
	I've been fighting this bullshit for years, but I don't have hopes it will get better.
	Am I just a pussy?
	Yes, you're a pussy.
	Just fuck a chick, knock her up.
	Yes, New York is bad.
	There's plenty of places where America is still America.
	The vast majority, I would say.
	Los Angeles, New York, Baltimore, Philadelphia, Chicago.
	They're all done.
	But those are just a bunch of red cities.
	All right, we've got to wrap it up here.
	How we've been doing, have you seen Sam Hyde's documentary gaslighting YouTube cuck and iDubbs?
	Who's iDubbs?
	I keep hearing about Sam Hyde and iDubbbbbs.
	Some YouTuber guy who did it, he was planning to do a documentary and then he won't release the footage.
	And it looks fucking awesome.
	So Sam, you know, he's like, no hard feelings, but I'm going to release the footage because we fucking set up a whole, we made our whole world interesting and insane.
	So when you come here, it's like Charlie's Chocolate Factory.
	Oh, I saw some of the things they were setting up.
	Like they'll keep wrestling each other, but they're going to call it boxing.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Dude, they did so many fun things.
	They went to go shoot guns.
	They fucking had a sit-down interview part.
	Then they had the whole office, each playing a different role.
	They hired a chick to shave her head, act like she was Sam's girlfriend, and she was like on meth.
	She was like cracked out, or maybe crack.
	And she was like, hey, man.
	But she wasn't.
	She was an actor.
	Mikey.
	But she did such a good job.
	So is iDubbs a lefty?
	I actually did a little research, but I couldn't find anything overtly political.
	But they had, here's the thing that iDubbs brought up as if it was a smoking gun.
	That they had an interaction in the past that was lightly rude.
	I don't want to spoil it, but you should.
	He's the guy on crazy shit.com that appears and says, you're a whore.
	Huh.
	Oh, they want to know if in hot water parents.
	That's a good sign that we've run out of things to say.
	So how much money did we raise for Max and John?
	That I would have to go into the things and check it out.
	Our tech guys have more of a back end.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Okay, that we have.
	So can you ask him?
	Shall I ask him?
	What?
	Yeah, I'm going to clear these out if you could ask him that.
	Will there be another episode of Girl Talk tomorrow?
	Also, can we get a Miss Maddie as a guest sometime?
	Tomorrow we will not be doing Girl Talk.
	It's really hard to get those girls talking about.
	Judging by Maddie's face, I'm going to guess that's a no.
	Yeah.
	We'll get the gals together again at some point.
	Jesse Lee, I have a problem with my mom.
	She used to be mean to me as a kid, losing my virginity at 22.
	I think it's hurting my relationships.
	Could I be a baiter?
	Well, yeah, you do have to forgive your mother because if you live without forgiveness.
	I just texted our guy and said, what's the total?
	I think that's important for people.
	You know, you don't want to just throw money into a big fucking hole in Kazakhstan that's on fire.
	That's right.
	In fact, I'd like it if we had a toll here.
	Chessee Boudin, pronounced Boudin, not Baudin.
	Also, where did Jesse Lee Peterson go?
	I'd love to hear his opinion.
	Well, he's been here all night, dude.
	Yeah.
	It's as long as you've been off the South.
	Well, for Lent, I go whatever that is, 40 days.
	I drink beer, but that's not coming up in March, right?
	Shit, yeah.
	It's always right during vacation time.
	So I'm in like fucking Barbados having a bud light.
	One time I just shifted it.
	I don't know how God feels about that, but I just went like after vacation.
	You nudged.
	I just don't let anyone offer you a shot.
	It's a temptation.
	If somebody offers you a shot, you can't say no.
	You have to do it.
	Yeah.
	George Brett's face with the word water would be a good shirt.
	Yeah, we got to make more shirts.
	That's on my to-do list.
	Are you adding them all up?
	No.
	Okay.
	We should show George Brett in this Pine Tar fight, though.
	You can't show George Brett.
	Killie Martin?
	Yeah.
	He goes...
	That was great.
	Like, Pine Tar can be...
	You can have Pine Tar on your bat about as wide as home plate.
	It can't be longer than Home Plate.
	But his was like six inches over.
	And they go in because it was over.
	And George Brett goes, if they fucking kill our win because of a quarter inch of Pine Tar, I'm going to fucking lose it.
	Billy Martin was the best.
	That's when men played baseball.
	He loses it.
	That was clearly the golden years of baseball.
	Oh, yeah.
	Like NFL, too.
	Back then, you'd like to.
	Doc Ellis pitching a no-hitter on LSD.
	I mean, come on.
	It's hard to compete.
	The book about the Mets winning the World Series is called When the Bad Guys Won.
	They're conceding that they were the bad guys.
	Exactly.
	Okay, quickly, Ryan.
	Win at all costs.
	We're in overtime here.
	OT, baby.
	Someone's asking if your dad is Jack McGee.
	No.
	That's stupid.
	Yeah, there we go.
	Pine Tar incident.
	You may have to jump ahead.
	We don't need that.
	Oh, he hits the home run.
	Uh-oh.
	Canada there, baby.
	That's the old Yankee Stadium.
	Who cares if the Pine Tar is going a quarter inch too high?
	It's just a technicality.
	And Nettles is leaving the field as if the game is over.
	Greg Nettles.
	I'm not sure.
	They might have a legitimate bribe.
	And the umpires are going to get together.
	George Bretton looking around and wanting to know what's going on.
	And the umpires are going to get together and talk about this thing.
	I swear to God.
	Kansas City was a cool team, too, because in the old days, a lot of the people were from Kansas City.
	Yeah.
	Well, Kansas City, Kansas is Kansas City, Missouri.
	Missouri, I believe.
	It's Two Kansas cities.
	Right.
	But this is Kansas City Royals, right?
	Are they from Missouri?
	I'm not 100%.
	To be honest with you, I've never really thought about it.
	Whose idea was it to have two Kansas cities?
	So, right now, George Brown is like, I swear to fucking God.
	God help me.
	If they pull this pine tar bullshit.
	The issue is if you have pine tar up above that length of it, it's on the barrel of the bat.
	Because the ball adheres to the bat more.
	That would be worse for you.
	No, instead of the ball, if safety you're high on the bat, the ball would flip up high in the air.
	It would be like a pop-up.
	But with that, it's going to not let it flip.
	It gives it more adhesive for the ball to make contact with the barrel of the bat.
	Oh, they were playing the Yankees.
	Yeah, that's the Yankees.
	It's the Yankees who are probably pushing this shit.
	Billy Martin, right?
	Number one.
	That's the manager.
	He's a guy who's famous for kicking fucking dirt across all the plate and everything.
	He would get in the fucking um Billy Martin was the best.
	I mean, he was a player, too.
	I mean, he looks like such a snitch, right?
	He's going to go tell the mom.
	Now they're going to measure it across home plate.
	I've never seen this.
	I never have either.
	I never have either.
	Can we just see George Brett lose his shit?
	I want to go home.
	He's going to lose it.
	Forcibly restrained.
	God, Brian.
	Look at that face.
	You guys see him come off the bench.
	That's the man who shits his pants.
	He's got tobacco in his mouth.
	And Demon Matt.
	He is out.
	And having to be forcibly restrained from hitting playoff by Tim McClellan.
	Best man alive.
	Like I said, I have seen this before, Frank.
	And Game Hard Parents.
	Great stuff.
	Nice.
	You know, we have an update.
	Okay.
	$930.
	Fuck you.
	Beautiful, baby.
	Ryan, you're wrong, by the way.
	Not only he put the dollar sign on the wrong side.
	Thank you.
	It's a little dig to the boss, man.
	Ryan, you're 100% off.
	Somebody, they said $600 worth has been paid, but now it's $940.
	It's $1,501.
	Okay, well, I'm getting from our other tech guy.
	Who?
	$740.
	I'm getting it from our main tech guy.
	Oh, okay.
	Who are you?
	Who's our other tech guy?
	It's a guy.
	I'm getting it from the guy who has similar genetics to my wife.
	I see.
	Okay.
	Who are you getting it from?
	A guy that helps that guy when, let's say, he may be.
	Fuck that guy.
	We're at the top here.
	FTG.
	Fuck that guy.
	You're talking to his assistant.
	I'm talking to the guy.
	Okay.
	1501.
	Nice.
	And furthermore, I'm personally liable if it's not 1501.
	So if Ryan's right, which he isn't, I will close the gap.
	The number is 1501.
	Stop doing that.
	We raised $1,500 for Max and John tonight.
	That's $750 each to them.
	Thank you so much for contributing.
	I didn't like super chats.
	I do when it's for those guys.
	Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	Music.

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