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July 30, 2021 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:07:46

GOML LIVE #110 - COPS AND ROBBERS

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	That was grade two from the Isle of Wight, funny little island off the bottom of England.
	And they're like a kind of a cool oi band that a reader sent in.
	Reader.
	A viewer.
	High quality.
	Grade two is what we call second grade in Canada and Britain.
	You guys say second grade.
	And I've learned not to say that because people make fun of you when you use the wrong colloquialisms in this country.
	Cox bar shirts.
	Ben Sherman's.
	What's the Isle of Wight like?
	I've never been down there.
	Cool, I'd imagine.
	You're hop skipping a jump from France.
	Welcome back to the show.
	Welcome to GOML Live.
	This is the one that we make free as a podcast.
	We have our co-host, Maddie Odell.
	Good evening, everybody.
	How's your monitor working out?
	Can you see the right thing?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	And the audio sounds good, Brian.
	We're ready for Skype calls?
	Sound and butte.
	I got to get Maddie's...
	So right now, your lab is the only one working, and I'm just tinkering with these.
	So maybe it would make sense to solve that before we go live, no?
	You know, I think we hit a technological limit here because it could only understand one lab at a time, and we're feeding the computer two.
	But what about the directional mic that we had in front of him?
	That's if we go through the board.
	If we choose our audio through the board, then they'll hear that, but then they might get that echo.
	That dreaded.
	Dreaded echo.
	So they've been able to hear Maddie, and you can hear him, but he doesn't sound as crisp and good.
	We want crisp and good.
	Sounds like this is the kind of stuff that should be looked into before 9 p.m. on Thursday night.
	What do you think?
	To me?
	Yeah.
	Oh, I agree.
	Yeah.
	It's been a busy week, but you're right.
	It hasn't been a busy week.
	I've been gone.
	You've had, you've had, I left, what, Friday?
	You've had Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.
	Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.
	Five days.
	So I'm trying to see if I could blend these two into one.
	Send these two labs into the one.
	So it's not getting two different things.
	It's getting one stereo thing.
	Not stereo.
	A mixed down thing.
	You're a fucking retard.
	We'd like to thank our sponsors.
	Let's start with Tactical Walls.
	Tactical Walls are coming down soon.
	I'm all over the place in August.
	Cooperstown, I'm going on vacation.
	I do stuff, renovating the house, all kinds of shit.
	So I don't know when he's coming here, but he's going to Tactical Wallsify the office.
	So that'll be fun.
	But Tactical Walls is a sponsor that's been with us almost as long as our original sponsor, Johnny Apple CBD, who we'll get to in a second.
	But it's a fantastic way to display your guns.
	We just had a few subscribers send us pictures of their mod walls where they...
	If you're going to spend that much money on something, you want to display it nicely.
	You want to have easy access.
	Of course, it makes people like us here in shithole states like New York green with envy when we see the way you can display your things.
	We have to have them triple sealed in safes with the ammunition and a different safe and all this fucking horseshit.
	But Tactical Walls allows you to display your guns in a way where they get the beauty they deserve.
	And that's tacticalwalls.com.
	If you put in the promo code Gavin, you get 20% off all orders.
	We made fun of the ad copy guy's text so much that he no longer says anything in the ads.
	He just says, say whatever you want.
	So we're saying whatever we want.
	These guys have, you should go to their site, Ryan, rather than just...
	Yeah.
	All the different cool places they have to hide your guns to.
	Like we use one of them.
	We have the shelf you see on the left there where you shift something over and the shelf drops down and then you got your gun hidden behind mirrors, hidden behind wall panels.
	We have the issue box where it's hidden in a tissue box.
	It really is incredible the different places you can hide your guns.
	And guys who break into your house, usually not that smart.
	So it's not like you have to have some complicated French maze from 1836.
	The slightest subtle change of the environment is going to throw them for a loop.
	Look at all the different sh things they have.
	It's not just tactical walls.
	They have the hero wall.
	Also with the firing's setup.
	What's the hero wall?
	It's on their site.
	What is it?
	It's like right there on the left with the firefighter.
	Oh, I see.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, it's not just guns.
	If you're living in a state like New York, you can put up stuff that's not just guns.
	Anyway, tacticalwalls.com, promo code Gavin, 20% off.
	Go there now, whether you're displaying baseball equipment or just having stuff by your front door to hang your jackets and your motorcycle helmets and your baseball gear, or if you're lucky enough to be able to display guns.
	So you know how this goes, folks, right?
	Free till 9.30.
	Then we go behind the paywall.
	We take letters for the first hour.
	Then we take calls From 10 to 11.
	And what do we do?
	We just really just make fun of liberals.
	I saw Amy Siskin is having a meltdown.
	My neighbor, she's a horrible cunt who is sort of the Pied Piper of the Karens of the suburbs.
	And she trains them to launch domestic terror campaigns on people she disagrees with.
	Under the auspices of tolerance, which is the funniest part of these Karens, they're out there to terrorize people that disagree with them in the name of diversity.
	Diversity of opinion doesn't matter.
	But I checked her Twitter feed, and she says she's on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
	And she wants people to leave her alone.
	And if you're going to be mean to her, don't go on her feed, which shows you the sort of IQ level of this silly cow.
	I would recommend if you've been trolling her and mocking her, I think it's a great time to ramp it up and point out her mistakes.
	And when I encourage harassment, I'm obviously not talking about doxing or saying, you're a bitch, you're a dyke.
	But it's fun to point out the hypocrisy and the glaring errors of all these people.
	They don't know what the fuck they're talking about.
	Like, we were talking about the Capitol the other day, and they go, you don't know how hard it was.
	You know the suit I had?
	The blue suit I had where I was picking up water bottles?
	Well, I donated it to the Smithsonian so people could see the pain we had.
	Remember there was that senator who was bawling his eyes out?
	I think that was like today, crying his eyes out about how scary it was.
	AOC still has PTSD.
	She wasn't even in the building.
	She was almost murdered.
	I was almost murdered.
	She was nearby and she was almost murdered.
	And then you go, wait a minute, when people were really trying to kill Trump and storming the White House, you made fun of him for going into a bunker.
	Remember all that?
	The limitless tweets from Ted Liu and Samuel Jackson, celebrities, everyone laughing at Trump for going to the bunker when people actually want him dead.
	And then when there's some trespassers meandering, it's ridiculous that they're not, everyone meandered, everyone who meandered isn't in jail.
	All right.
	I'm worried this show is going to suck already.
	Can you bring up the crybaby?
	What are you doing?
	I looked on Pesobic's.
	You saw it on Pesobic, right?
	No?
	I saw somebody crying about the thing, but it was two days ago.
	Was that a different one?
	A man.
	It was a man crying.
	He had an award in his hand.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That was from a couple days ago, so I'm finding it.
	Okay.
	On Poso.
	But don't look on one guy's Twitter feed, especially someone who posts every 30 seconds.
	Just look at that.
	My thought is, I don't know his name, neither do you.
	So what do I type in Senator Crying?
	Politician Crying, January 6th.
	Here, I'll do it.
	Let's see how fast I can do it.
	We're currently racing.
	So I'm going to Brave browser.
	Politician cries.
	Statement, maybe?
	Jan 6.
	And then I might even just jump to videos.
	Lawmakers tiered up.
	Here we go.
	Rep Krizinger.
	Kinzinger.
	So now I go back to the original thing.
	I have Kinzinger crying.
	That's all I have to put in.
	And here we have it.
	This dude.
	So.
	These are all cops.
	Here we go.
	They're going to have to run Doctor.
	At least it's not what we can defend.
	Oh, the humanity.
	We're going to have to run Doctor.
	At least it's not what we can defend.
	That reminds me of that mayor, the George Floyd mayor, who was sobbing at his casket.
	And he was doing this elbow, this shoulder thing.
	Sobbing uncontrollably.
	Yeah.
	Where was George Floyd killed?
	Was that Minneapolis?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, Minneapolis mayor, who looks like this weird gay Jew crying his ass off.
	Crying George Floyd.
	We should set up something where my computer can go to the feed so I can just do your job.
	Jacob Frey is his name.
	F-R-E-Y.
	This is from back in early June, but fuck is it funny?
	On its gold-plated casket.
	I want to see your tears.
	Remember when I was a kid, I was pretending to cry for some reason, I can't remember why, and I spat on my fingers and I put spit in my eyes, and I was like, Dad, it's just not fair.
	And my dad touches my eyes with his finger, tastes it, and he goes, that's spit.
	He caught me immediately.
	Maybe there was bubbles on it.
	But I just want to come up to those guys and go, there's no fucking tears there.
	Crocodile tears.
	Like Van Jones, who was drying them like this when he was crying on CNN.
	Fucking liar.
	All right, shall we jump into the letters?
	We ready to go?
	Should we start the show?
	We got a crier.
	What do you mean?
	It's in this clip where this man cries, this Kissinger.
	But I thought there was one with him holding like an award or something.
	Yeah, that was Photoshop, whatever, After Effects, meme stuff.
	He was holding an Oscar.
	The joke, Ryan, is that he's overacting.
	Great actor.
	Talked to a number of you and gotten to know you.
	I think it's important to tell you right now, though.
	You guys may individually feel a little broken.
	You guys all talk about the effects you have to deal with, and you talk about the impact of that day.
	But you guys won.
	You guys held?
	Held?
	You know, democracies are not defined by our bad days.
	We're defined by how we come back from bad days.
	We want to take accountability for that.
	And for all the overheated rhetoric surrounding this committee, our mission is very simple.
	Let's define the truth.
	I don't see any actual tears.
	I want to see tears.
	Like most Americans, I'm frustrated.
	That's six months.
	Just getting the choked up.
	You guys all talk about the effects you have to deal with.
	You know, you talk about that day.
	I mean, the banner is.
	Look at how good that is.
	Yeah, it's so good it fooled a retard like you.
	You don't think there's Oscar CNN moments?
	You guys help.
	Now I can't tell if you're fucking with me.
	You know, Tamak, you guys all talk about the effects you have to deal with.
	No real tears.
	What a pussy.
	So I've been through all of the mailbag, but I stopped at around 7.20, and we have new ones since 7.20.
	So let's just live life on the edge and jump into ones I haven't even seen yet.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Mr. Show, hey homos, hilarious sketch, but man, this could cancel Bob Odenkirk.
	I want Bob Odenkirk to be canceled.
	He almost died over the weekend.
	Yeah, good.
	Just kidding, God.
	Just kidding.
	I think he's lying about his home invasions.
	I've had three home invasions.
	Really?
	What a coincidence you're talking about them right now while promoting a film about home invasions.
	Home invasion.
	Have you ever heard of a home invasion?
	Yes.
	Well, it's basically a burglary.
	I understand, but anyone you know, can you talk about it on air?
	I was actually arrested once for a home invasion.
	Oh, yeah.
	What was that one now?
	I knocked on the door to talk to somebody, and because I actually stepped inside the door, it was a home invasion.
	Because I was on the property without permission.
	I love criminals talking about their crimes in a sanitized way.
	I accidentally knocked a door down because I wanted to have a meeting with someone and discuss some things that we had had some time.
	Yeah, we already sorted out a few issues, but the actual.
	The female who answered the door was a little reluctant to testify, so she moved to Kentucky and refused to come back to court.
	So the case was dismissed.
	I wonder what made her reluctant to testify.
	I don't know.
	Maybe she was suffering from PTSD.
	But the concept of a, and that's like, you're probably dealing with criminals and someone called someone a snitch or something or someone was a snitch.
	Well, it's actually somebody who actually kidnapped somebody.
	Oh, yeah.
	They kidnapped.
	I know they killed him.
	They forced their car off the road and then like forced them to drive to the home that I went to and then basically had him sit in a chair and they smacked him around.
	A few things like that.
	Yeah, I remember this story.
	And I had done time with the guy who had smacked the person around, so I went to get the straight deal from like what was up.
	And that guy who was kidnapped had a million chances to escape.
	Him and his girlfriend, yeah.
	That's the strange part of the story.
	Yeah, but you figure about it, the guy the day before forces someone off the highway, forces them to come to their house, then smacks him around and humiliates him in front of his girlfriend, and then I go there to find out what's going on, and then they call the police.
	Doesn't make sense.
	It's not hard to stop a bully.
	But yeah.
	Any burglary of a home, which I think is like a C felony because it used to be at night it was more dangerous, like an invasion, because it had more of a chance of people being home in bed sleeping.
	Oh, I see.
	Yeah.
	And like commercials are a B it's not as bad as a home invasion because it's commercial property at night.
	If there's not a chance of running into people in the store.
	Oh, right.
	If you go into a home invasion.
	In the IRA, they would bomb buildings when they knew people wouldn't be there.
	Yeah.
	There's a difference between commercial and residential.
	The residential becomes a home invasion.
	But the home invasions you're talking about are criminals getting back at criminals, and that's normal stuff.
	But the idea of like a Bob Odenkirk family with his nerdy wife, who's a talent agent, I believe, and their five kids.
	He's been doing very well for a while now.
	Better call Saul.
	Even before that, he was on Breaking Bad.
	So the guys, I know someone who was at his house like five years ago, big pizza oven in the kitchen.
	Like, he's upper middle class at the very least.
	Yeah.
	So that's Westchester.
	So someone comes into your home in Westchester, I mean, it would be international news.
	Yeah, it would be.
	It would definitely be.
	It would be on the news in Germany.
	Definitely on the local news circuit.
	Yeah.
	And this happened four, or no, sorry, three times?
	And he was home all three times?
	I don't know if he was home all three times.
	I call fucking bullshit.
	Also, yeah, we talked about this before on the show.
	My house would be beyond Fort Knox.
	It would be razor-wired top to bottom.
	Private security, whatever you need.
	Yeah.
	Anyway, someone sent us a Mr. Show sketch called Operation Hell on Earth.
	Mr. Show was probably one of the greatest shows ever made.
	We can return America to her God-given glory.
	America first!
	America!
	Okay.
	This is how people see Proud Boys.
	Now here's what this is what America is going to look like after the mandatory relocation is enforced.
	New York City Will become known as Little Israel.
	I figure all the Jews will love that.
	Is that okay, Mr. Pierre?
	That's fine, Ken.
	Okay.
	Now, down here is gonna be your new Africa.
	See, your colors keep to that.
	They get up.
	I don't see a Virginia there.
	Oh, well, Chris, that was gonna be part of Homo Arabia, which is over.
	You know, see, them homos get to sodomizing.
	Yeah, I'd kind of like to be by the beach.
	Well, okay, I guess the colored's gonna have Virginia, too.
	We'll annex that.
	Can, can.
	Yeah, can.
	That's SpongeBob SquarePants.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, that's his voiceover?
	That's his voice?
	Yeah.
	Where's Homerabia now?
	Well, Josie, I was gonna...
	Kind of a one-trick pony.
	That's fucking SpongeBob's voice.
	Yeah, he's not got a lot of range.
	I think it's called his voice.
	Anyway, we get the joke.
	But you know what's funny about that sketch?
	I did an article a long time ago called 13 Things, Mr. Show Sketches That Became Real.
	And it's up to like 25 now.
	That is real.
	In DC, blacks are talking about having black neighborhoods, but black counties with black mayors and black politicians, they are self-segregating.
	We are getting Homo Arab and little Israel.
	I mean, Americans are naturally, and I blame social media.
	I think social media has created these bubbles where we go, I don't want to talk to anyone who disagrees with me.
	And we no longer correspond with each other.
	So now you have people that are saying, I'm done, with their own families, too, X-ing their own families.
	I'm surprised your families stayed so close with them being in law enforcement and you being in the opposite.
	Well, there was about 20 years we were estranged.
	Oh, really?
	Yeah, yeah.
	So were any of them your friends?
	My brothers and sisters?
	What about like Thanksgiving and stuff?
	No, pretty much non-existent.
	For 20 years?
	Close to it.
	I mean, I would go to my mother.
	I mean, I would go and then I would stop going out.
	I would be like, ah, I don't want to sit across the table from someone I have to be phony or who's going to be phony to me.
	Huh.
	Like, I'll go to see my mother.
	You know, my mother was, you know, I loved her.
	It was my mom.
	Right.
	But my sister was always close with me.
	My younger brother was okay.
	I mean, my brother, my older brother, because he was law enforcement, you know, conflict of interest.
	Oh, see, I love corruption.
	I wish you guys were pals like Whitey Bulger.
	Oh, my brother was by the book.
	Which is not a bad, you know, that was his career.
	And he's still in law enforcement.
	Yeah, but you guys could have been a great team where he tells you when busts are coming.
	The relationship I have with all of my family members now are okay.
	Yeah.
	This is from Pizza Machine.
	G Moi, you're gorgeous.
	Check out this band from Canada, Mets.
	Well, I like the sound of the name.
	We have to get through an ad, of course.
	Oh, are you on a better YouTube than me?
	You don't get ads?
	I have premium.
	Yes.
	I got to sign in, Mom.
	Top left corner there, premium.
	Doing big things for this.
	Hey, this is boring.
	Boring.
	Hey, jump in the middle.
	How many times have you heard this fucking boring Foo Fighters modern rock hardcore?
	Just the guy in the band saying, check out this band I discovered called Me.
	There's no lyrics, but...
	Just jump in the middle there.
	Is that the middle?
	This is...
	Yeah, this is fucking...
	Fuck off.
	He moved like three times and there was never any lyrics.
	It's, you know, something.
	Sounds like a guitar riff on Luke.
	How did Maddie and his brother go in such different directions?
	That's from a Japanese name.
	Okay.
	I'm not too sure.
	I mean, my brother worked a normal job.
	I think he became law enforcement at an early age, maybe 23, somewhere around there.
	When did you become a bad boy?
	Well, I've been getting in trouble since I was like eight.
	Well, weren't you babysat by some bad boys?
	Oh, yeah.
	Yes, yes.
	Yeah.
	Very, very, very good.
	I mean, in my eyes, you know, they're great casts, but they have a very sinister reputation.
	Yes, I know.
	When their names come up at my gym, everyone shits their pants.
	And these guys are professional fighters.
	My brother, my sister, and my younger brother all grew up with him.
	We were neighbors.
	Like, literally.
	So what do you think sent your brother on a law enforcement path?
	I think my brother took the civil service test just on him out of, I mean, he went to university.
	What did he take in university?
	First he was out in the University of Arizona.
	And then my father passed away early, 49, and then he came back, you know, helped my mom out and stuff.
	And he ended up with a BA in Bachelor of Science in Criminology and all that stuff.
	Okay, so he was into it before criminology?
	No, he went back to college after he had gotten on the job.
	Like, he had started off as an officer, then he did undercover work, then he was on.
	Right, so what sent him to pursue that?
	That must have been young then.
	Yeah, I think he got on the job at 23.
	When he first went to college after high school.
	And you don't know what set him off?
	No.
	I think he just was, the test was coming up, so he took it.
	A lot of people do that.
	Hmm.
	Oh, we're running out of time here before we go behind the paywall.
	Let's talk about our other sponsor, Johnny Apple CBD, who has been here since day one.
	What is CBD?
	CBD is pot without the illegal parts.
	And we all assumed that the magic was in the THC and it's in the illegal part, but they took that out and it's still Amazing.
	It is a gift from God, really.
	I have my problems with pot actually.
	Pot with THC, I think it makes you lazy.
	I don't think it should be illegal, but I also don't think it's magic.
	I mean, booze kills a lot of people, and they and pot doesn't really kill anyone, but they just assume that means it's perfectly innocent.
	Pot makes you sleep in too late.
	It kills a young man's ambition.
	It's especially bad for teenage guys.
	I had these two best pals when I was in high school, and we started smoking pot at the same time.
	It was actually hash.
	And then they went off at a tangent.
	I stopped smoking it, and I got my life together, and they just became fucking potheads.
	And they never really went anywhere.
	Anyway, Johnny Apple CBD does not have the sleep all day bullshit in it.
	And pot seems to have some real magic in it.
	The gummies help you sleep at night.
	The tinctures take the edge off your coffee.
	They take the edge off your day.
	The topicals take the edge off your workout when your bones hurt the next day, your muscles are aching, you put the topicals on, you feel 100% better.
	And then there's things I haven't even tried, like the cartridges.
	Ryan, you've tried a bunch of shit, right?
	Yeah, they sent us a whole bunch of good-ass shit.
	They have a vape pen thing.
	Yeah, you do the vape pens.
	It's a very nice quality.
	It's like a quality.
	I know a lot of vape pens.
	I used to buy like the disposable ones, but these are like nice quality vape pens.
	Huh.
	And then you smoke it down.
	It tastes good.
	So if you go.
	It doesn't feel like nothing.
	You feel like a...
	Oh, you get a bit of a buzz?
	Not a buzz, but I didn't get that with the tincture.
	You feel like this.
	Instead of like this, like this.
	Huh.
	Yeah.
	Can we see that again?
	Yeah.
	So instead of this, like, you feel like this.
	Yeah.
	It's good.
	So if you go to johnnyapple.com right now and you put in the code gavin you get 20 off just like tactical walls pretty much all of these you put in the promo code gavin you get 20 off all right let's get back to the let's uh oh we got one from uh about maddie um why are you such a fucking fag no uh i had to say no really fast um some
	area i didn't get down there and look too close because she was nuts and then what happened after that how'd that whole session end oh we were uh we locked ourselves in a bathroom in the in the bottom of one of the clubhouses in uh hartford and uh we were in there for about an hour and a half going back before you know two linebackers coming out and then uh it was actually st. Patrick's Day and she came out we came out we're sitting at the bar in the bottom of the clubhouse and she goes uh want to go to the parade
	um garbage bags so they you know they come and they're like should we call the police and they're coming no they're should we get garbage bags that was their response yeah but um so they come down, and I'm sitting there sweating.
	She's sitting there, sweating, well, breathing, like, you know, just had a heavy session.
	And oh, just mad.
	Hey, goodness, because I had just come home from prison at the time.
	And they're like, oh, I said, you ever meet my wife?
	And they all were like walking side and stuff.
	So they were both there with their wives, too.
	Oh, yeah.
	Two.
	It's not, there was a few members.
	They were there actually from Rhode Island.
	This is a simulation of right before you guys are about to.
	Yeah.
	That was a tough one.
	It's them fucking in the bathroom.
	Yeah.
	It was crazy.
	It was definitely one for the books.
	But not your cup of tea.
	No.
	Kind of like fucking a female bodybuilder.
	That was a tough one, too.
	I had to do it just to say that.
	Oh, I agree a thousand percent.
	But it was.
	It was like literally grabbing this bar.
	Yeah, yeah, a man.
	That's a man's body.
	Whatsoever.
	It was a rock.
	Grabbing the arm.
	You fucked the rock.
	And it just ruined it.
	I mean, we did the D, but.
	Well, the entire concept of sex with heterosexuals is me, like, you want to be the rock.
	You want to be the bar.
	And sometimes we're not.
	And then she's soft and smooth, and it's the juxtaposition.
	But, like, you want her to sleep in the crux of your arm there.
	That's the ideal with her leg over you, her little soft leg.
	But the idea of you sleeping in her thing, you're ruining it now.
	So if she's any kind of hard or any kind of dominant or she's got like size 12 feet, we've lost the whole dynamic here.
	It wasn't like she was like a fitness bottle or bikini.
	She was a stone cold straight up bottle.
	I was like, oh, like she could pick you up and go like.
	Oh, yeah.
	Absolutely.
	All right, let's get back to the question though.
	But sometimes you have to ignore it.
	How do you feel about that, Neil?
	I think a lot of men.
	That's actually a woman.
	That gets mistaken for a man.
	Deep-seated, rude behavior.
	You know, I'm being hurt as a woman.
	They don't even take the time to see who you are.
	They just go ahead and accuse you.
	Oh, that's a dude.
	Or judge you like they are God.
	Yuck.
	That's a dude.
	I don't even like looking at that.
	All right.
	So here's the answer to the question.
	Ideally, you're a virgin.
	I know this sounds crazy.
	Ideally, you're a virgin and you're Christian and you meet the love of your life and you guys get married at like 18, 19, and you have 10 kids.
	I know that sounds mental and none of us have experienced that or will ever experience that.
	But I have noticed that when I meet young Catholics, they have great sex lives.
	They love each other.
	They have tons of kids.
	They lead fantastic lives because they build their habits up together.
	So like I like movies on a Thursday or whatever.
	I'm making up habits.
	That's Thursday night's movie night.
	They like going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras.
	That becomes their habit together.
	They grow together.
	Now, though that's the utopia, none of us end up with that.
	I mean, the love of my life when I lost my virginity ended up being a crackhead.
	I'm glad I didn't marry her.
	So it's kind of a two-pronged question because it's like saying, what's the ideal number of fucking bourbons to drink if you want to piss the bed?
	Like, it's a vice.
	It's wrong.
	But let's cut out that utopian model where you marry your high school sweetheart and have tons of kids.
	We hope you do that, but we know you won't.
	So as far as getting a good sort of concept of what fucking is, I mean, I don't understand why you'd need more than 20 under your belt.
	You and I both have 20 million.
	I've got in the hundreds.
	But like a fat chick, a skinny chick, a black chick, an Asian chick, a threesome, you kind of get the idea.
	Pussies are not that different.
	It's not like some are sideways, some are big, some are small.
	If you pay attention and no female anatomy, you'll do well.
	And I'll tell you another thing.
	When you're fucking your wife and trying to make a baby, that sex is in a different universe.
	Here's one thing I will say.
	I caught myself fucking this girl Amanda to, I think Ska was playing on my computer, and I was actually dancing to the music, so I was more invested in the song than I was in the actual pumps.
	And that's when I was like, you know what?
	Holy shit.
	That's when I went, it's time to stop.
	So if you catch yourself with your mind wandering during intercourse, it's time to settle down.
	And ladies, you, from 20 to 25, I'm not going to murder you.
	But at 25 up, you got to start caring about who you're fucking.
	Guys, kind of the same thing.
	Like, you started getting wasted doing Coke partying at 15, 14.
	You're 25 now.
	How much Coke do you need to do?
	How much beer do you need to drink?
	How many parties do you need to go to?
	I mean, in New York City, 45 is still considered like, well, he's still partying a little bit.
	That's 15, 25, 35, 45.
	That's 30 years of fucking partying.
	Three decades on the town.
	That's embarrassing.
	Aren't you embarrassed?
	Okay, we got to wrap it up.
	These go by fast, don't they?
	So I'm going to end the show for the freebies.
	Are you still putting these on the podcast thing?
	Oh, yeah.
	Do they get hits?
	Should we still keep doing this?
	Yes.
	How do you know?
	Because if they're late, they'll get some emails.
	Oh, no.
	So we end the show with our usual mantra.
	And if you're not paying for the show, we suggest you do.
	It's $10 a month.
	You're already paying $10 a month for a million other things you don't even use.
	I get this bill for PS4s.
	We don't even use a PS4.
	Or maybe it's an Xbox.
	I don't even know.
	But I see it in my bank statements and go, I got to cancel that at some point.
	The kids don't even play that fucking video game.
	But you get much more entertainment on here than you do on Netflix, Hulu, anything else.
	Because we Are a wee bit of sanity in a world gone mad.
	We tell it like it is, not just my show, but all the shows on this network.
	Give you the news on a daily basis and tell you what actually happened.
	So you watch, you know, the young Turks of the News, and you'll hear a story that, oh my God, the cops photoshopped a black man to make him look more like the perp.
	We're living in a corrupt society.
	Antifa's riots are totally justified.
	And then we tell you, no, no, no, no.
	The guy had facial tattoos.
	When he went to rob the bank, he covered his facial tattoos with brown makeup.
	When they showed the picture, they took out his tattoos to show you what he would look like with no tattoos.
	And what he looks like is the bank robber.
	And it was the guy, and he was a serial bank robber.
	So you're being lied to.
	We tell you that at Censored.tv.
	Anyway, in the interim, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop playing.
	But wait, Maddie, I didn't ask you.
	What do you think about the chicks and the fucking...
	How many?
	Yeah.
	Like, say you had a new son.
	We won't talk about your own son, but...
	Right.
	You have a new son, and he asked that question.
	And he's like, Dad, should I marry my first love or should I play the field?
	How many times?
	How many chicks should I play the field?
	I would definitely tell him to play the fields.
	Well, my real son's turning 26 in two weeks or so.
	But I think he's settled down with one now.
	He's been with her for a while.
	So, like you said, from like 15 to 25, go out there and have fun.
	Variety is the spice of life, and there's a lot of spices out there.
	Rip it up.
	Well, I will say one good thing about sleeping around is you're walking down the street and you'll see like a fat black girl or a skinny Asian or a Jew with one leg that's too short.
	And if you fucked all of them, you don't sit there going, I wonder what that would have been like.
	You're like, I know exactly what that would be like.
	I've done that type, that type, that type.
	But ultimately, at the end of the day, you're like, I chased too much pussy.
	And I've heard a lot of celebrities, celebrities and rock stars say that.
	Like Sammy Hagger type guys.
	They're like, I spent so much money and time chasing pussy.
	And it was just like the same pussy every time.
	At one point, like in the height of my debauchery, I actually got bored with sex.
	Like girls would say, oh, I'm this, and they'd be duds.
	And you're like, this is what you were talking about.
	You were going to do fireworks were going to shoot out of your ass and all sorts of fucking crazy things.
	You're going to rock my world.
	And I'm like.
	But the thing about that is, is I lost touch with relationships.
	Intimacy, yeah.
	Right.
	We sound like fags right now, by the way.
	I don't want to sound like a pig or anything, but it was basically like, I want to take this toy off the shelf, play with this one for a while, and then put it away, and then take this toy down tomorrow.
	And I literally, it got to a point where I kind of lost interest in just regular, like, like, it was like, and I didn't know how, I started to lose because I'd be out all night, strip clubs, all, you know, just random, bizarre, like, rock star lifestyle sex escapades.
	And you're like, this isn't real.
	This isn't normal.
	This isn't what it's about.
	It's just, it's like a, almost like a sex attic.
	And they're there for the drugs, too.
	There's no sincerity to it.
	I've seen girls, I've seen crazy things with girls and drugs.
	The things that they would do.
	Oh, my God.
	I used to have these two first cousins that used to go down on each other.
	First cousins would go down on each other.
	Wow.
	Congratulations.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I just realized the real usage of that.
	You have to be jealous while you do it.
	Yeah.
	Congratulations.
	All right.
	Gav, you should have censored.tv Biden leaves office pool.
	I'll take the day after Thanksgiving.
	Ryan sucks.
	Maddie rules.
	Thank you, sir.
	No, thank you, sir.
	I'm worried about getting a bust.
	I have the cops right up my ass right now.
	If I jaywalk, the SWAT team appears.
	So I don't know how we do that legally, but that is an interesting concept.
	I'm going to say 2024.
	I'm saying it officially here now, folks.
	In 2024, Biden is going to be so brain dead that no one's going to vote for him.
	Kamala Harris will say, I can take over.
	We can have a different VP.
	No one will want anything to do with that.
	And then we'll have DeSantis and maybe Matt Goetz if he can beat this pedophile rumor.
	Not Trump.
	I don't see Trump running again.
	And they will win.
	I don't believe so.
	And it'll be because a big part of the election in 2024 will be because Biden is just fucking, like, you think these past few weeks have been bad?
	Oh, my God.
	We're about to see a new level.
	Next level.
	We're about to see things like, I've had alligators and talk, I've had an alligator call me nigger before.
	And you know what I did?
	I said, come on, man.
	That's not, come on, man.
	Wait, not an alligator, a racist.
	Racists say niggers.
	Oh, no, I'm sorry.
	A nigger called me an alligator.
	That's what it was.
	You know, I just.
	You don't think other animals get horny?
	People get horny all the time.
	And that applies to lobsters, cockroaches, everyone.
	We've got to stop focusing on me being horny because just because I am.
	Procreation is in there.
	Oh, look at that girl.
	Look at that.
	She's like 11.
	She could be 11 million.
	Fucking tit.
	Wait, did I just stop fucking?
	Sorry.
	I think we're going to have more of those.
	Oh.
	$700 billion and a trillion three hundred million billion dollars.
	We had that with Reagan, didn't we?
	Towards the end, he would fall asleep at these important meetings and stuff.
	He was a vegetable by the end.
	We've been through this before.
	But you think he's going to go to 2024?
	Yes.
	Full term, first, full first term.
	Yep.
	And it's going to get worse every day.
	Oh.
	A slow, pathetic, agonizing decline.
	It's been six months and it's already.
	Shocking.
	It's already shocking.
	Like the Don Lamond shit with talking about inflation and the guy says or 300 times or he sounds like a seal.
	And then the left goes, oh, he just stutters.
	Okay.
	Read the transcripts and take out the repetition.
	Because the transcripts, if you say or or or or or, they don't write or or or or or.
	They write or.
	So just read the transcripts.
	And it's still fucking brutal.
	He says printing more money will lead to less inflation.
	No, it increases inflation.
	Digging more and more into the ground makes a more shallow hole, according to Joe Biden.
	So that's my guess.
	What do you think?
	When do you think he's gone?
	I'd say two years.
	And then Kamala Harris is president?
	Mid-first term, he's out.
	And Kamala's then president.
	Yep.
	And who's the vice president?
	Would be Goldberg.
	What is the succession?
	The Oprah Goldberg ticket.
	Isn't it the Speaker of the House?
	Nancy Pelosi.
	Is it Nancy Pelosi?
	Yeah, it would be two females in the White House.
	Nancy Pelosi and Kamala Harris.
	Wouldn't that be funny if they were just awesome?
	They were too busy worrying about stuff, so they just privatized everything just to get it off their plate.
	And all of a sudden, we had this raging free market, libertarian paradise with strong borders.
	That's what I'm talking about.
	Highly unlikely, but a fantasy, maybe.
	I think he's out midterm, first term.
	What is this now?
	Let me just jump down.
	I'm going to only do things I've highlighted.
	Pit bull meme.
	Sup fags, not a fan of pit bulls.
	And this man shows, his name's Trash Can Paul, and he shows pit bull owners have their earplugs in, they have the crack pipe smoked, they have the child endangerment supported unconditionally, and then they have its pit mommy time.
	Do you know what I'm talking about?
	Yeah, I got this here.
	Now, you're pro pit bull, right, Maddie?
	I actually have a tattoo of one.
	It says pit bull on my arm.
	But is that the rapper or the actual?
	Oh, okay, gotcha.
	The rapper.
	I like Mr. Worldwide.
	I'm Puerto Rican Irish.
	He's Cube.
	I don't like Pit Bulls.
	I think it's not worth the risk.
	Well, I've had two in my life growing up.
	Are you getting sensitive now, like annoyed that I don't like him?
	Oh, no, no.
	He's lost one friendship to the people.
	You hate all dogs.
	What?
	You hate all dogs.
	Yeah.
	Well, I don't have a lot of feelings for dogs, but pit bulls, I just think they disproportionately attack kids.
	Why risk it?
	And you brought home strays to your mom.
	Yeah.
	Where'd you get them from?
	I bought them from friends.
	I was young, young, 14, 15.
	The problem with stray pit bulls is you wonder why they were available and you think because they fucking bit a kid.
	And all that muscle, it's like having a shark tank.
	Yeah.
	Two powerful animals, but they call them land sharks, don't they?
	Yeah, they got to be walked 900 hours a day.
	They're all muscle.
	That's kind of awesome, though.
	No, it's stupid.
	If I could own a shark and have it be my friend, I would absolutely do that.
	Yeah, well, we don't know if these pit bulls are their friends.
	You see this thing about Cassandra Fairbanks?
	The government took away this lady's chimps.
	She had a chimp enclosure.
	It was really nice.
	It was like bigger than two people.
	No, PETA did.
	PETA did, yeah.
	PETA took away the chimp enclosure.
	But the government works with PETA now.
	They facilitate that whole thing.
	She's like...
	So what they do is they take your animals because you're abusing them, according to them.
	And then they don't know what to do with the animals because they have too many.
	So they just kill them.
	Oh, geez.
	Like, there was a guy, I learned about this from Cassandra, who he went away for a week, and his house has a doggy door.
	And he has a huge backyard that's fenced in.
	Massive, like bigger than this studio.
	Twice the size of the studio.
	So he has the neighbor come by and feed it twice a day.
	And he's like, I'm just going to leave it here.
	So they treat it as an abandoned dog.
	They take it to their compound.
	The compound goes, we have too many dogs here.
	And they kill his fucking dog.
	Legally.
	Euthanized.
	Yeah.
	So yeah, that's, and it's really a good example of what socialism does, right?
	I mean, they say, I'll handle this.
	I'm better at distributing justice and food and health and safety.
	So I'll handle your problems.
	And then they end up going, I can't handle this and killing the thing.
	That's Stalin in a nutshell.
	Dear Gavin and Ryegai, Sunisa Lee, she's almost like Simone Biles.
	And this is about the black gymnast who said, this is too hard and quit the Olympics at a pretty crucial time.
	And now this Asian steps up to the plate and does well.
	And instead of saying she's awesome, everything goes through the lens of Simone Beals.
	Aspiring to finish second to Simone Beals in the all-round because that was the best thing we could do exceeded those expectations.
	Like this guy sent in a bunch of headlines and Simone is in all of them.
	As Simone Beals watches on, or they're praising Simone Beals for praising this Asian gymnast, American gymnast, Sunu Sali.
	Isn't that, and this goes back to what I was saying on yesterday's show, black women are spoiled brats.
	And the world, or America, bows at their feet.
	Plus, she was also one of the ones that was molested by the Olympic doctor.
	Oh, really?
	Yeah.
	I also heard some other scoops on Rogan that she was prescribed Ritalin, and she got all those golds while on Ritalin from the other Olympics four years ago.
	And it's illegal in Japan, so she couldn't take her Ritalin.
	So, you know, there's two things going on there.
	Is it performance enhancing?
	And then also...
	Oh, it's performance enhancing.
	It fucking is, isn't it?
	Vitamin R. It's the same as Adderall, right?
	It's methamphetamines.
	It's very similar.
	Yep.
	Yeah.
	It'll get you uber-duber-focused.
	And, you know.
	The kids, they call it vitamin R. Vitamin R?
	What's the R for?
	Riddling.
	Oh.
	No, we know people at our bar who snort it like Coke and party all night long.
	Ridalin, patches, Adderall.
	Well, that's juicy gossip, Ryan.
	Yes.
	But there's two things going on there, too.
	Like, psychologically, if you're on any sort of pill for a while, then you stop taking it, you are going to be kind of fucked up.
	And she got all raped and shit, and who cares?
	We shouldn't be as angry at her, I guess, as we should be.
	Oh, I'm happy to be totally angry with her.
	It is pathetic that everybody's...
	Here's why I'm angry.
	Happy that this is happening.
	If this was a MAGA kid, a Covington Catholic school kid who was proud, pro-Trump, American flag wearing, and he said, I just can't handle it, man.
	This is like too much.
	My head's getting all fucked up.
	I got to stop.
	The fucking media would drag him behind a media bus and rip his skin off.
	But because it's a black woman, we can't fuck with our spoiled brats.
	Yeah, she's being celebrated.
	That's the gross thing.
	She's being celebrated for having a bad thing.
	Yeah, Barstool Sports had a whole thing where it's like, you go, girl.
	This is your mental health.
	The greasiest wheel gets the squeak.
	Quote me on that.
	That sounds like an Anthony Cumiya joke you're stealing.
	No.
	Okay.
	I promise.
	I promise.
	You know, porn for kids.
	So this bitch, Flora Gill, says today, someone needs to create porn for children.
	Great, great plan.
	Hear me out.
	Young teens are already watching porn, but they're finding hardcore aggressive videos that give a terrible view of sex.
	They need entry-level porn, a softcore site where everyone asks for consent and no one gets, you know, choked, etc.
	And then after the shit hit the fan, she backtracked and said, no, no, no, I meant like, when I said children, I meant like 14, 15, 16.
	Children.
	Yeah, children.
	Hi, welcome to the child porn site.
	Wait, hold on, hold on.
	No, this is porn for children, not child porn.
	How about kids don't watch porn?
	How about that?
	Yeah.
	What a dumb, fucking ugly bitch.
	Afternoon, gentlemen.
	Gavin, every episode, get fired, get in trouble, be brave and never stop fighting.
	Also, Gavin.
	Well, if one of the law schools you get into wants to force you into take an experimental vaccine that has killed tens of thousands of Americans and doesn't stop you from getting a virus with a 99% survival rate, then you should get it.
	And then he's quoting me and he's saying, in other words, when it comes to COVID vaccines, stay enrolled, stay out of trouble, be a coward, and surrender immediately.
	So this person's not happy with me.
	That was last Thursday.
	Yes.
	The letter.
	Yeah, I don't see the vaccine as potentially fatal.
	I don't want it.
	But if it's going to affect the rest of your life, I mean, I don't know.
	It's a pretty tricky question.
	He's talking about a letter we had last week where a girl was in law school and she needed to get the vaccine to continue there.
	I mean, my wife and kids needed it to visit their in-laws, my in-laws, their parents and grandparents.
	I don't know.
	My thing with the vaccine is I don't think people should have to take it.
	I guess I just contradicted myself because this woman has to take it for law school.
	Tough.
	Yeah, maybe I was wrong.
	Maybe she should just not go to that school.
	Maybe she doesn't want to die on that hill.
	I don't know.
	Eventually, I mean, she has the choice, the freedom of choice of not taking it and then finding another law school.
	It's a tricky thing with the show because when I say get fired, get in trouble, like I don't want some asshole with three kids who're relying on his income to start going, I love Trump, fuck all of you, as a Walmart greeter, you know?
	When I say get fired, I mean don't destroy your own persona and eat yourself up being someone you're not just to hold on to your job if, you know, your kids aren't going to die of starvation.
	Obviously, you don't want to destroy your family, but you have to be yourself.
	And in this case, yeah, maybe I was wrong.
	Maybe you should just find another law school.
	Have you thought about this?
	If we're going conspiracy, a binary thing where the government's trying to kill us.
	Which is possible.
	Yeah.
	I don't think it's possible.
	What if the vaccine really, what if there really is a bioweapon that's put out there to kill everybody, coronavirus?
	It's super spreadable.
	It doesn't fuck you up enough to not be able to spread it around like it is.
	Like everything's, you know, it's COVID.
	But then the second wave, what if the Delta does really kill people?
	And all the people that don't trust the government don't take the vaccine, but the vaccine is the only thing to save them.
	So we know not to trust the government, but are they just trying to kill off everybody who doesn't want to be forced vaccines and shit?
	Like anybody with critical thinking is like, I'd rather not take this vaccine and stuff like that.
	You don't get the vaccine, you die.
	What if?
	What if that's the way that this is going to happen?
	I think we tend to give these people too much credit.
	Right.
	I mean, to plan to kill us all?
	Like, I was talking to Pat Dixon last night, and he's convinced that they killed a bunch of people with COVID, and now they're going to kill more with the vaccine.
	And they're trying to eradicate the population.
	It's not too far-fetched the way they're treating the January 6th meanderers.
	Yeah.
	Like today you saw that they got, you know, Marjorie Taylor Greene and Matt Gates, they got locked out of prison.
	They couldn't even go and oversee a prison that they helped fund.
	And that's a normal thing that they do.
	They go visit prisons to see their conditions.
	They wanted to ask, what are they eating?
	How often are they eating?
	Are they getting exercise?
	Do they have religious rights?
	And they got locked out.
	And Biden is pushing this thing to have all government employees mandatory vaccinated.
	Not politicians.
	Not Pelosi, but DMV workers.
	Anyway, that's boring.
	We'll talk about that tomorrow when we can be more in-depth.
	Thursday shows are more fun and light.
	Grown man in diaper getting breastfed on train.
	Now, I watched this carefully.
	Something fishy is going on with her tits.
	I think this might be an art prank.
	I left the water at home.
	So she's an art school girl, and he's a black guy who wants to fuck her.
	He's not even sucking her tits.
	Look, that's not how you suck tits.
	He never took his pacifier out.
	Yeah, this is fake.
	Yeah, this is a new adult swim show.
	There's a hidden camera somewhere.
	Box of shorts under his diapers.
	Can you pause this?
	Not yet, but I'll tell you when.
	Stop!
	Those look like plastic joke chopped.
	Wait, wait, wait, yeah, look at her neck.
	Look at her neck.
	And then also, look at the, like, go back a bit.
	Look at...
	There's another line at the bottom.
	We're tit to tit.
	Stop.
	So there's the neckline, which is weird.
	Yeah.
	Then there's the line with the fake tits, which is below that by her collarbone.
	So I think they were trying to blend the makeup because they're too lazy to get black fake tits.
	So they got white fake tits, but she's black.
	And then if you look right below the tits, there's another line.
	Oh, yeah, I see what you're saying.
	So there's three tones.
	There's the white woman fake tits.
	Wait, look at her hand.
	That looks like fake tits.
	Look at her lower legs.
	Yeah, they're white too, though.
	What the fuck is this?
	What is she?
	What erases is this woman?
	And she also, if you look at her tits when she's yelling, she's got big, heaving mamasita tits.
	Those little plastic tits are tiny little white tits.
	They're not even moving.
	Like when she went to sit down.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, those are facade tits.
	Those are veneer tits.
	Prosthetics.
	So this has gone insanely viral.
	It was sent to us about 100 times.
	But if you look at this, that's a New York train.
	It's on an L somewhere.
	An elevated subway.
	And definitely New York City.
	She took her wig off.
	And nobody in the train's wearing a mask, so it's old.
	Wait, those look like big or titty.
	Well, it went viral today.
	Well, I'm saying nobody in that is wearing a mask.
	And you can't ride transit or public transportation without masks.
	You can get away with it, but yeah, for the most part, nobody...
	I'm the only one not wearing a mask when I take the train.
	Yeah, me too.
	Right, but.
	Yeah, it could be for a show, dude.
	Like, Impractical Joker season eight.
	Oh, boy.
	Impractical Jokers.
	Untrue season.
	I love she ripped her wig off.
	Yeah, this has got to be for a show or some shit.
	Yeah, that's bullshit.
	All right, Kevin, I'm trying to better understand your view on the powers that be in this world.
	I've heard you talk about the globalist politicians, but do you really believe that Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer are masterminds behind the decline of the West?
	Who specifically is propagating the globalism, and what are their motives?
	Is it a spiritual thing?
	Also, when is the dollar going to go to shit and be worthless?
	Yeah, that's a complex question.
	I think George Soros is a well-thought-out globalist who has been sponsoring DAs and has a grand master plan.
	I think Nancy Pelosi is a fucking retard who just goes with whatever her whoever's writing the check, she goes with them.
	AOC, Chuck Schumer, all retards who just follow the money.
	But I do think there are people out there with big, strong, grandmaster plans like Soros.
	Bill Gates.
	Bill Gates.
	And the politicians are, there's levels, right?
	Like, Antifa are just the paramilitary wing of the DNC.
	They don't really know what the fuck's going on.
	They're retards.
	And then they're getting funded by, you know, DNC.
	And then Pelosi and Chuck Schumer are also the same retards for Soros.
	Pelosi and Chuck Schumer are Antifa.
	And they say as much.
	You know, Maxine Waters says, harass them on the streets.
	Tim Kaine says, fight in the streets.
	Eric Holder says, when they go low, we kick them.
	They're all the same.
	Garbage.
	But there are definitely intelligent people up there with big money.
	The high cabal.
	Who want to destroy the West.
	And is it spiritual?
	Yeah.
	I mean, Soros is an atheist.
	He hates God.
	His father was a rampant atheist.
	So I think there is some anti-Christianity in there.
	Most racist video ever and titles.
	Can you believe this?
	Assuming only blacks commit bad crimes.
	And then he sends us a video of white crimes from Dickie, the Jewish guy with a small penis.
	This is weird.
	Yeah, people acting like I ain't a fucking criminal, like I ain't never doing dirt though.
	Probably cause the way I'm doing shit is clinical.
	That guy looks like Collin Capricorn.
	I see that looking at me.
	We've been doing shit despicable.
	But we just keep it on the low, for example.
	Walking to the movie with my pants full.
	Twix, bag of trips plus a snapple.
	Stealing all the shampoos from the hotels.
	Pretty bathrooms.
	Cheating.
	I've been peeking in the clay.
	You know what's funny about this?
	Jew bag?
	He's trying to mock whites and saying, he's mocking himself.
	And he's saying, yeah, I'm a badass too.
	I stole shampoo and I snuck Twizzlers into the movie theater.
	So he's trying to be self-deprecating.
	But what's really going on here is he's saying whites don't really commit crimes like blacks do.
	Yeah.
	We're actually pretty cool.
	I thought if you pay for the hotel room, you get the complimentary shampoo.
	Yeah, they're not going to reuse it.
	Like you're bored of the people.
	They're not going to take the one that you took a little dip out of and then poured into a new one.
	So those are yours.
	You can have the shampoo.
	Self-hate.
	So he's going for self-hate, but what he's really saying is whites are not criminals and blacks are criminals.
	And we don't do crime like blacks do crime.
	So he accidentally tripped into racism while he was trying to be self-deprecating.
	Ha ha.
	Fucking moron.
	And then speaking of Jews, we go, here's some good boobies on YouTube.
	Now this one you have to...
	Oh, you're already all signed in.
	Not safe for work.
	Oh.
	So this is Wheeler Walker.
	I hope everyone knows who Wheeler Walker is, right?
	He got away with this?
	What the fuck?
	Wait, how?
	It's art.
	Wow.
	But then anything is our porn would be considered art with any of these freaks.
	He's also a successful Jew.
	Very anti-Semitic episode tonight.
	Ben.
	What is his name again?
	Yeah, he's a popular comedian who's trying to sasha Baron Cohen this character and make people believe that he's an actual country music singer.
	He had a show on Comedy Central that was called The Ben Show or something.
	That's great.
	I love that show.
	Yeah.
	Is that what it was called?
	The Ben Show, yep.
	And it was pretty good.
	And then he did a character on The Ben Show that was this guy.
	And he enjoyed it.
	So he started writing country songs.
	And a lot of people fell for it.
	And he keeps pushing it.
	In fact, I had him on my show.
	Yeah.
	On the Gavin McInnes show.
	And he was totally committing to the bit and getting mad if anyone questioned it.
	But, you know, the internet exists, dude.
	You're a fucking phony.
	And it's like Henry Winkler doing the Fawns.
	Anthony Dice Clay, what's his name?
	Boner with Sean Anna.
	Bowser.
	Bowser.
	And now we have...
	There's so many Jewish guys that act like tough Italians or tough Southerners.
	It's a weird obsession.
	It's like they're mocking testosterone.
	Anyway.
	I guess I'm a...
	Dear pre-transitioners, Elliot was Elliot before he became Ellen.
	Oh, this is an interesting theory.
	Ready for this one?
	Look closely at Ellen.
	He's talking about Ellen Page.
	Huge head, square jaw, wide shoulders, weird facial angles betraying a shit ton of facial feminization surgery, and that slightly bassy, not quite feminine voice rinsed out by years of female hormones.
	Now look at Elliot.
	Never mind that he's mental.
	He's a man.
	Lengthy, lithe, and knobby-kneed.
	Long, humorous, not the funny spelling, bones like a man.
	And his pecs are naturally male.
	That famous post-surgery pic, that's a man's body.
	What woman looks like that?
	Don't let those made-up tit scars fool you.
	He really means it when he says tears of joy.
	Notice the genuine white-ass smile as he's bawling about making it back to being a man he was born as.
	Hollywood must be a shit show.
	And this is Joe from Queens.
	Now, you know what's funny about that letter?
	We got another letter from someone who I'm going to get on the show, I think, tomorrow.
	So tomorrow's show could have this letter writer.
	It's from a tranny.
	So it's, I guess, a lesbian who became a dude.
	And he goes, hey guys, mentally ill tranny here.
	I don't know if you've talked about Ellen Page in her transition and becoming Elliot Page, but she did an interview with Oprah, and then he includes the link.
	This subject header is Tranny Elliott Page on the Oprah Conversation.
	As a trans man, I noticed some odd things about Ellen, and I'm just not fully convinced that she's actually trans.
	More accurately, I think she's a prop being used by Hollywood to push for support in drugging up kids with HRT, hormone replacement therapy, in order to confuse future generations and create unstable people who can easily be manipulated by the powers that be.
	Since she first came out in December, she's been an activist for trans kids' rights.
	She's even wearing a sweatshirt that says protect trans kids on Instagram.
	There's a link for that.
	Also, Ellen is definitely not on testosterone.
	So this is the opposite of the previous letter.
	She just looks like a wrinkly dyke with a shitty haircut and zero tits.
	She doesn't sound different at all and still has the malnourished physique of a mental patient.
	You might look at her abs and think she's a fit dude, but she's either sucking in her gut or went under the knife for ab implants.
	Top surgeons commonly upsell ab and peck implants to their trans patients, as did my surgeon, but I'm not retarded, so I declined.
	Anyway, oh, so that she's saying is fake.
	It does look pretty fucking weird.
	I think I'm more inclined to believe this subscriber than the previous one.
	I think this makes more sense to me because she was on Vice's Gay Cation.
	She toured the world as an activist for gay rights.
	And then people started getting bored of lesbians.
	And she said, okay, I have to be trans.
	And she had her tits cut off and didn't take testosterone.
	She just wants to stay in the spotlight.
	I like this person's theory more than the other guys.
	Familiar 20s.
	Anyway, if she's not on tea, then she's a fake tranny.
	The first thing trans guys do is get on testosterone.
	Beside it being cheaper than getting your top or bottom surgery.
	Yeah, if you take testosterone as a chick, I bet your tits just normally vanish.
	It is the most relieving part of transitioning.
	Your period stops, your voice drops, facial hair grows, fat redistribution occurs, you gain more muscle working out.
	I'm suspicious of people who say they're trans but don't take hormones.
	It smells like they're either really fucked in the head, more than me, it says, or they're disingenuous about who they are.
	It'd be funny a year from now, she starts rocking a beard and blows the whole fake tranny theory out of the water.
	Anyway, thanks for reading.
	We had another subscriber who said, wouldn't it be funny if she became a tit man?
	Fucking tits.
	Have you ever seen the...
	She's pretty famous.
	She's in a lot of porn and porno magazines.
	It's a girl that chopped her tits off.
	She's bald.
	She feels like a bald angel.
	Keith the cop would always show me that.
	No, that was the thing at Compound Media.
	Anthony Coomi would always say, all right, you have to fuck Buck Angel or who's the tranny that was their friend?
	Bailey.
	Bailey J. What's your answer?
	I think I would rather fuck Buck Angel with the mustache and the bald because now I go to my grave and that's just a very, very ugly and deformed woman I fucked in the pussy.
	But if you fuck Bailey J, you fucked a dude.
	Yeah.
	I'd have to go with the biological female.
	Yeah.
	I've had a lot of these pictures are shown.
	Ugliest woman in the world or the prettiest man in the world.
	You're going to go with the woman.
	I want to be a woman.
	It's like eat the shittiest food in the world or drink poison.
	All right.
	Should we start taking some calls?
	Yes.
	I found this, by the way.
	I think you confronted him.
	Playing a character is the name of this.
	Did we see?
	No.
	Okay.
	Yeah, no.
	Oh, okay.
	I do want to see it.
	I just don't remember it.
	There was a publication in Houston, a woman who on her Twitter described herself as feminist before writer.
	And she just saw the song titles and said, you know, I'm going to go after this guy.
	She went after me every week in her paper.
	Which probably just helped.
	No, what I was going to say was, I'm an independent artist, but I have a distribution company.
	And the company calls up and goes, what are you doing in Houston?
	I go, what do you mean?
	He goes, they go, it's your biggest market by far.
	What are you doing?
	I go, nothing.
	I'm just sitting here.
	And they write articles about me every fucking two days.
	That woman must have sold me fucking 10,000 records.
	Oh, that's wonderful.
	Because people read it and they go.
	I think you're just waiting to ask him too.
	I can see it behind your eyes.
	You're like, okay.
	Then I got so pissed, I said, let's do an interview.
	I can explain who I am.
	And then while I was on hold for the interview, I go, I don't want to fucking talk to her.
	I know she's gotten a gym now, so I hung up.
	So I hung up, and then badass Wheeler Walker Jr. pussies out on interview.
	I got another article for not talk, you know, held my ground.
	Yes.
	And that guy knows what.
	And she got so.
	I feel like you're waiting to ask him.
	Don't get your hopes up.
	A character.
	The whole publication was sending me nasty tweets.
	Now, what do you say when people say that you're like a character, like Larry the Cable guy?
	And you're not you, you're a comedian that's playing a guy.
	There's nothing you can say that pisses me off more.
	Yeah.
	I mean, it's like, I go, what's, I usually answer, I go, is his real name Garth?
	Is that his born name?
	I go, you know, was it Alton John when he doesn't walk around in that duck suit, you know?
	Right.
	Like, it's rock and roll.
	It's showbiz, you know?
	Yeah.
	Like, like, a cowboy hat is no longer like a thingy to wear that has any purpose.
	Right.
	It's not keeping the sun off when you're rounding up cattle.
	Especially when you're on stage in an arena.
	Like, these guys don't need to be wearing cowboy hats.
	Like, it's all an act.
	It's showbiz.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, whatever.
	I don't know why that bothered me.
	I guess I'm mad I wasn't meaner.
	All right, let's take some fucking Kizal's.
	Kizz, Zizz, is all, Zols, Zizzals.
	Let's play the thanks for calling.
	Yeah, let's have a little bumpy.
	You are on the air.
	This is a fucking loser.
	Understand why.
	Hey, why does everyone get two things?
	You have one thing.
	Thank you for calling.
	It's great hearing from you.
	Bye-bye.
	All right, next call.
	So right now, we are setting up the calls.
	The number to call in is coming up right now on the screen.
	See that?
	That's what you're going to need to call if you'd like to talk to us, boys.
	Got Maddie in the house.
	We got Gabo at the hell.
	We got me at the whatever's in the back.
	So, so far, so great.
	We are getting ready to do this.
	Maddie, are you excited about this?
	Oh, yeah.
	Always excited.
	I am love to talk to the audience.
	They're great.
	And let's see here.
	Just going to punch in a little code.
	You know, Maddie, this is a game of codes.
	They're always asking me, what's the password?
	What's the code?
	What's the code like?
	I'm a button guy.
	I'm not a titzer and ass man.
	I'm a butt guy.
	Button.
	Button ass man.
	Yeah, me too.
	I like flat tummy, nice ass, nice to eyes.
	Is that so much to ask?
	No.
	I don't like the super skinny.
	You don't like Elliot Page framed, broad?
	No.
	She bent over and looked like two elbows.
	If you had to pick between a super skinny...
	Like, there's this chick, what is it?
	Gavin Elvira or something like that?
	Anthony loves her.
	She's like the skinniest girl on the internet, and she's like anorexic, basically.
	Yuck.
	He doesn't like her.
	He just likes being like, whoa, what a weirdo.
	But her mother, because she knows it's like a freak show, she probably promotes her bulimia.
	She like enables her to be bulimic.
	Anyway, so that girl or a bodybuilder?
	Oh, you mean like, so Auschwitz, skinny?
	Yeah.
	Or a bodybuilder.
	Oof.
	That's tough.
	I'm going to go with bodybuilder.
	Yeah.
	Because it's more healthy at least, right?
	It's like...
	Yeah.
	She makes often up throughout the years.
	Oh, dude, there's a...
	Oof.
	I mean, the bodybuilder could probably beat you off really fast.
	Oh.
	Oof.
	We got calls on the line here, and everybody all set up.
	Angelo.
	What's up, Ange?
	Hey.
	Hey, I'm sorry.
	Did you have the topic up that I wanted to talk about already?
	No, let's hear it.
	Yeah, okay.
	So it was about the NSO group malware, the hacker tools that people were buying, or governments were buying.
	Hijackers hijack social media accounts for the NFL and 15 teams.
	Yeah, so I actually write some tools kind of similar to that for the good guys.
	And we had an odd WebEx with the New York State Prosecutor's Office one day, and they asked for similar tools to the NSO group malware.
	This was a couple years ago, to replace the WhatsApp exploit that they were using, which I thought was really weird.
	So we kind of go a little more in depth, and they said, well, what we're really trying to do here is we're trying to construct an alternative story for how we got access to some of these systems.
	And I said, so you mean like parallel construction?
	And they said, exactly.
	And I go, well, I can attest to the software and we can write utilities, but that's not really in our wheelhouse.
	So I thought that was pretty shocking that they would come right out and ask for it.
	Okay, am I stupid?
	I'm having trouble following any of this.
	So someone hacked the NFL accounts, and you're saying that you work in tech, and the NYPD asked you to do something similar to hack into accounts.
	No, no.
	No, it was the NSO group, the Israeli hacking firm.
	Oh, the ones that were spying on those journalists.
	Yeah, yeah, no, they're used all over.
	Those tools are bought by government, and apparently New York State, the New York State Prosecutor's Office has purchased exploits from these guys.
	So you can just buy software that hacks into Twitter accounts?
	Absolutely.
	Absolutely.
	Can you find out who owns the Twitter account?
	Well, I mean, that would be something where that's kind of more on the back end where who owns the Twitter account.
	There's ways to correlate that.
	And there's a lot of companies that do that kind of analysis.
	But these are specific tools used by government agencies to gain access to things that they otherwise couldn't gain access to, like via WhatsApp, where they send you a link, they'd send you something, and it would pop your phone, pop your, you know, your secure method of communication,
	and then they would own your box.
	Now, the way that it usually goes is they're using this to launch other tools, and it's usually against another nation or something like that.
	But in this case, it was the New York State Prosecutor's Office that asked for it.
	And they asked for it to pursue child, like busting up child pornography rings and things of that nature.
	But it's still the New York State Prosecutor's Office using hacking tools against, you know, who are they going to use them against?
	They don't have jurisdiction to use them against another country.
	So they're using them against people within the state that they're investigating and then asking for a plausible story to go around it.
	That sounds like Jan 6.
	So they're using it to investigate the Jan 6 guys.
	I don't...
	I mean, that's certainly a plausible chain of logic.
	If they're going to try to, if New York State's going to use it for parallel construction, it's conceivable that the feds would.
	I'm more interested.
	That sounds believable and likely.
	But I'm also interested in this concept that if you have money, you can buy a way to hack into someone's Twitter account, fuck with them, and find out who they are.
	Is that legal?
	No, that's TSAA, Computer Fraud and Abuse Act.
	So that's not legal.
	But other countries have different rules.
	So sometimes you'll ask a, you know, like, go to the Ukraine and say, hey, listen, I really got this guy that I want some intel on.
	Can you guys, you know, use these tools to go over here and get them?
	And they kind of side channel it.
	Wow.
	So, I mean, and there's entire offices of guys who work on stuff like this, like the NSA Tailored Access guys.
	And there's all kinds of freelancers and, You know, whatnot out there that do develop these utilities.
	And the Israelis are just very good at it.
	Unit 8200 specifically, they're the cybersecurity unit, and they also are heavily invested in their venture capital funding.
	So they fund these guys, they build these companies, and they're basically just spies.
	They're just an extension of those cyber investigation units.
	Wow.
	What's the big known one as what it's called, Phoenix?
	Pegasus, right?
	Pegasus.
	That's it.
	Pegasus.
	Can you hear Maddie, by the way, Caller?
	I can hear Maddie.
	I can hear Maddie.
	So Pegasus, you're talking more of a suite of tools where they would have different maybe modules.
	A lot of these guys, it's not about that initial access mechanism or the exploit.
	It's about the tools that they deploy after the fact to keep the access going, credit out.
	So that's what Pegasus.
	I dealt with similar stuff like that before a lot of apps came out in like, say, maybe 07 or 08.
	They used to do with install it on phones.
	This was when, if you've noticed now, since like 2011 and up, you cannot take the batteries out of your phone.
	Right.
	Yeah.
	Because just taking the battery out of the phone was the only way to disable it.
	They would install what they called, we used to call them roving bugs.
	They would send, you would download data onto your phone and they would send it through the data.
	And then they would be able to, even though your phone would look black like this and off, they could activate it without turning any lights on, activate the microphones and listen to all the conversations in the room.
	Like I have court paperwork where this is documented and shown.
	Oh, yeah.
	No, no, no.
	So there are certain cases where that is completely used.
	But the batteries being not changeable now is more of a form factor issue.
	It's more of an ease of use issue.
	And the fact that these get to be e-waste.
	But you're right on the fact that they can install roping bugs, but when your phone is off, especially modern Apple devices and modern Android devices, if it's powered off, oftentimes it's powered off, but you still want to drop the battery because that trickle charge is going to keep things in memory.
	And usually what they'll do is, and I actually got to see the original Greykey, the original board for that gray key where they unlock the iPhone.
	That was an old Endgame systems project where they were popping iPhones.
	Endgame sold off it to a venture capital group.
	They didn't need it anymore.
	So these guys went off and formed their own company and called it Greykey.
	So when you turn off your phone, there's still information trickling in.
	And then when you turn it back up again, it brings the information back up.
	Right.
	Well, there is a little bit of that, but a lot of times if your phone is off, your phone is pretty off.
	Now, in older feature phones, you could dummy it, right?
	Like he's talking about older Nokia's, older type phones.
	Well, the Nextels were notorious in drug interdiction because that's what the cartels were used in the push to talk because it was just very easy.
	It was very secure.
	Huh.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	That's a lot of information that my tiny brain is barely able to digest.
	I should probably start taking Adderall again for these callers.
	Maybe I'll...
	Do you got a guy?
	I thought when we cleaned up that studio, I'd find a big pile of Adderall.
	No, you never found it, right?
	No.
	Sheesh.
	Stinky.
	Well, I know who we can't ask.
	Gold medalist fucking lady.
	Yeah.
	By the way, this broad's name was Eugenia Cooney.
	Who?
	That's her.
	Oh, he likes checking her out.
	Just to see how she's doing.
	Just always like.
	I think I'd go with a bodybuilder.
	I'm bodybuilder, bodybuilder, bodybuilder.
	Yep.
	It's hard.
	Well, we'll go from behind.
	We're going to do from behind.
	And I'm going to avoid those shoulders.
	I'm not going to eat her out.
	Surely from behind it won't be bad.
	I think it'll be worse from behind.
	Those glutes are like...
	Yeah, maybe like if she's on her back, you could just stare at the ditch like a lunatic.
	Well, if I got her, I would make her stop working out.
	Right, but we're talking about one night.
	Yeah.
	Oh.
	I've been there.
	You know, just try to make her stop working out for the night.
	What are you doing?
	Why do they do this?
	They got to be lesbians, right?
	Maybe they...
	Maybe molestation.
	I mean, that's what...
	What is it?
	Body is done.
	I understand, like, I don't want to be pretty anymore because I've been, you know, touched or something like that.
	Or lesbians.
	That makes sense.
	But lesbians.
	But I'm fascinated by guys who want that.
	I think it's...
	Stop, stop, stop.
	Go back to her.
	So I want to meet the guy that wants to fuck that.
	All right, well, let's see.
	Let's go in a little hole here.
	See who's commenting on herself.
	You're so beautiful.
	So you're attracted to women.
	Dude.
	What?
	She's vascular as fuck.
	Yeah, I would kill for those arms.
	Those legs.
	I would love to have her body.
	She'd snap your neck.
	I should say that at the gym.
	I want to try to get to whatever her name is.
	China.
	Remember that wrestler, China?
	Oh, yeah.
	I want to get my arms to China levels.
	That's my goal.
	China?
	Madonna.
	I want to get Madonna biceps.
	Cheers, Gav.
	Cheers.
	The thing is, her jaw was so wildly masculine.
	That's never a female.
	Actually, that was a joke, but it is kind of true.
	I would like to have China's torso minus the dids.
	Yes.
	Like, let's see her.
	She's strong.
	Yeah, that's what I'd like to have.
	Nothing crazy.
	I want to be like China.
	I would like to have those biceps.
	I think you've surpassed that, to be honest.
	No, I definitely do not have those.
	Naked Grover.
	Oh, someone said something interesting.
	They said, you and Ryan and Maddie should have an arm wrestle.
	I'd lose, and I thought that's the cool thing about being 50: is someone suggests that, and you're like, Yeah, sure, let's do it.
	Did I talk about this on the show yesterday?
	Maybe I already mentioned this.
	You know what?
	We should do too.
	Oh, maybe I think I did.
	I did, I did.
	We were talking about IQ tests not too long ago.
	Yeah.
	You just got the highest IQ.
	IQ tests.
	No, if you and I did an IQ test and you were 150 and I was 100, it would affect our friendship 0%.
	Yeah.
	I would just go, I'd be excited to tell my wife.
	I'd be like, Maddie has 150 IQ.
	Honey, you're not going to believe this.
	Maddie's a fucking genius.
	Like, I have this buddy Rob, a MAGA dad.
	He's short, and we went for a piss like a few months ago, and he pulls out this horse cock, this baby's leg, and he's just like, pss.
	And I'm like, holy shit.
	And I ran home to my wife, and I was like, honey, you're not going to believe this.
	Rob's dick is a leg.
	Little tiny Rob.
	Baby arm holding it up.
	And I joke around with his wife.
	And I've noticed suburbanites aren't big on these kind of jokes, but I was like, Jesus, I've seen your husband's dick.
	And you poor thing, I'm surprised you can walk.
	How do you walk?
	Shouldn't you be sitting on an ice pad right now?
	But I don't go, oh, fuck, I wish I had a dick that was black with white skin.
	When you get to like over 35, you don't care anymore.
	And I'm not expressing that well.
	You care about stuff.
	It's just competitive, isn't it?
	But you're not, yeah, you're just like.
	Good for you, dude.
	Yeah, you're good for you, dude.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Like your friend wins a lottery.
	He wins $10, $100 million, and you go, dude, you're rich.
	Congrats, your fucking legs.
	Holy shit.
	You should get a yacht.
	Now, maybe in your 20s, you're not like that, and someone says, we should arm wrestle, and you're like, oh, I can't.
	I'm in pain.
	I fucked up my arm.
	It's hard for me to remember your brain at that age, but I don't think, I think, if there's a time when you're jealous or FOMO or all that, it's in your 20s.
	But after that, you're just like, I wish you nothing but the best.
	Lots of insecurities.
	Yeah.
	Now, you know what's ironic?
	The opposite of FOMO exists.
	Like when Max and John went to jail, it fucking gutted me like being stabbed.
	And I still think about it every time, every day, every morning.
	I think about them.
	So when someone relatively close to you is hurt or endangered or fucked up or their mother has cancer, I think you're much more emotional about it.
	Whereas in your 20s, you're like, oh, your mom's dying?
	Cool.
	You're going to get tons of money?
	Yeah, when you're younger, I don't think you empathize too much.
	No, you're just about me.
	You're about accruing stuff.
	Me, me, me, me, me.
	I got to get more stuff.
	And then you get stuff.
	You know, maybe it's, you get stuff and you go, I don't want all this stuff.
	Like, if someone gave me a yacht, I'd go, I don't have time.
	I don't want it.
	Don't give it to me.
	Or a landmark.
	I'm going to learn how to sail.
	I don't want that.
	Like, sailing's gay.
	We have engines.
	So you get stuff and then you realize, oh, all of this wanting stuff, I have the stuff now.
	I don't like it.
	It's stupid.
	I'd rather go back to my shitty bar.
	That's so fucking funny.
	So true.
	It feels like he's in the room.
	What's the old saying?
	You are not what you own?
	Hmm.
	I like that.
	Yeah.
	And what am I?
	You're you?
	I'm less than that.
	Well, Ryan is what he owns.
	I don't want to be.
	A pile of shit.
	What if I said I want to be a toad?
	A toad.
	All right, let's take another call.
	Okay.
	We got somebody on the line.
	His name is Stink.
	Hey, her name is Stink.
	Hey, baby.
	Hi, Stink.
	Hi, how are you?
	Fine.
	I used to be a bodybuilder.
	Beautiful.
	But I was only like 108 pounds.
	So I think that it was more like a fitness thing.
	So I know y'all are talking about that.
	That was my question.
	But were you, wait, were you ripped like biceps and triceps and lats and six packs?
	Not like, no, not like fitness models.
	Like, did you compete as a bodybuilder?
	Yeah, I did.
	I mean, it was like more of the, you know, like the fat people got to lose weight show, whatever that show is.
	Yeah, like, we don't mind aerobics instructors who are super svelte, but it's when they have arms that I would like to have.
	That's when it's disturbing.
	Well, I mean, no, I wasn't like that, but yeah, I was in a competition and I won.
	So, you know.
	So who was attracted to you, no offense?
	Like, what kind of guys want a muscular woman to jerk them off and rip their dick off?
	To be honest, it was a challenge that I presented myself with, and nobody, I mean, really only dudes in the gym were attracted to me.
	And she was really shitty on me.
	Dudes in the gym.
	Oh, dudes in the gym.
	So other bodybuilders.
	Yeah.
	Well, that makes sense.
	Yeah, they're stronger than me.
	She was really shitty.
	She probably intimidated other men.
	Yeah, it didn't work out.
	I mean, like, as far as finding a dude, a guy, and, you know, did you take testosterone?
	No, absolutely not.
	No.
	Did you take any PEDs?
	No.
	No, I just wanted to do it for myself and see if I could do it.
	Anyway, yeah, that's not my question.
	Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
	Before we move on, so what are you like now?
	Well, you know what?
	The really kick-ass thing about that is it's gotten my metabolism.
	I'm like your age, Gavin, and my body is, I'm tiny, so it's, you know, kept me like thin.
	And, you know, I keep in shape, but it's nothing like those women that you see.
	I just am a little small built, but I'm, you know, I'm not like overweight.
	I do have kind of the curves, but, you know, I'm still little.
	Great.
	Well, let's have an affair.
	Yeah.
	Let's set it up.
	Let's meet at the motel.
	Anyway, so my question, I'm sorry, go ahead.
	I was going to say, you were saying that only men in the gym and other bodybuilders were attracted to you.
	What were you attracted to?
	Did you want guys that were also into bodybuilding or just the regular guy?
	So you're so into that.
	It's kind of like any sport.
	You're just so into that at the particular moment.
	So take the Olympics, for example.
	Like, you know, these people are so trained to just focus on what they're doing.
	And the only thing they can do is focus and eat and diet and train.
	And so they really can't have a life.
	So my life was training.
	And, I mean, unfortunately, I didn't, I had this dude.
	I was in college at the time, and he was like hot for me.
	I was taking courses and he was like, I want to give you a massage.
	And so I was like, okay, because, you know, I was like all tight and everything from lifting or whatever.
	I mean, I don't want you to think that I was huge because I really wasn't.
	So he comes over and he's like all thinking, I don't know, whatever.
	And all I thought about was food because I was starving.
	So it's really just relative.
	Did you make any money?
	No, no, it was just amateur.
	But I mean, these people in UC are like...
	I don't understand the monetary aspect.
	Like, who paid your rent?
	You were at the gym for five hours a day?
	No, I was in college at the time.
	My dad gave me, you know, well, I had money.
	My dad was fortunate enough to have saved up.
	But I also had to have a full-time job.
	So I was working and also, you know, had to go to school.
	Wait, you have a full-time job and you went to college?
	Your dad didn't help you out then.
	Fuck you, dad.
	Well, he did.
	I mean, no, he was doing, I mean, come on, you know what I'm saying.
	But yeah, but so.
	Okay, sorry.
	So let's get back to the other thing you want to talk about.
	Okay, so my question was the other day, like a couple weeks ago, you were talking about hardcore lifestyles.
	And I went down a rabbit hole.
	You were talking about Harmony Corinne and the kids movie.
	Did you ever talk to that guy?
	I mean, you were talking, I mean, you were at that scene around that time, no, or am I wrong?
	Yeah, I hung out with him a few times.
	He was a great guy, really funny, really weird, really quiet.
	And I think that he was a genuine artist who was one of those guys who came to New York and he didn't become this fake character.
	He was always like the weasel, funny little guy with the backpack.
	And he didn't get so insecure that he had to subsume some other personality and become this like badass dude.
	I think he was a real artist and a funny little man.
	And I think he got fucked over by everyone around him.
	Are you referring to the movie Kids?
	Is that the question?
	Harmony Corinne?
	Yeah.
	Yes.
	Yeah.
	It was a disturbing movie, but it was...
	Oh, it was a bullshit movie.
	Larry, what's his name?
	Made it about how we're all going to get AIDS.
	I think he had kids himself, and he was worried about the kids getting AIDS.
	You see that guy?
	That guy killed himself.
	Drinking to 40?
	Yeah, he got so...
	Isn't that funny you could have a comic book called Hate back then?
	That's Peter Bagg, who wrote that.
	Oh, yeah.
	But he, I hung out with him in Montreal once.
	He became typecasted.
	Casper did.
	No, Telly.
	That's Telly.
	And that's Leo Fitzpatrick.
	He's the one who bangs a girl at the end with AIDS.
	Yeah.
	When she's passed out on the couch.
	Yeah, Casper had a life.
	He got over it.
	A lot of these kids were so young that they couldn't get over the fame.
	Like, they just loved it so much that they tried to become major actors and it didn't work out.
	And then they died.
	Union Square.
	Like the black kid, Harold, he died of a cocaine overdose.
	That's not easy to do.
	But that dude killed himself because getting typecasted is like the tough New Yorker.
	And I was like, just take it, dude.
	The Ramones are typecasted.
	Yeah.
	Anyway, yeah, so I did.
	Thanks for calling.
	Thank you.
	I'm going to fuck her.
	You think she's got...
	She must have been very petite.
	She said she was 108 pounds when she was young.
	She's small.
	That's getting into like pedophile territory.
	Like my sister, my younger sister, she's like five foot tall, 90 pounds.
	I know.
	I fucked her.
	If you disappear next week, we know why.
	Oh, really now?
	Imagine just Gavin's dry and doesn't say any jokes around that.
	He's like, the weather is fucking awesome.
	No, but 108 pounds, I mean, that's pretty petite.
	Size zero.
	I like little gals.
	I've had some little gals.
	I don't like how porn, though, pushes little gals.
	Like this, I'm really disturbed by that Asian Filipina chick, Bella Delphine.
	Oh.
	You know the one?
	Not the TikTok one with the little face thing?
	The one with the things who does the.
	Oh, beepo, babo, beep, boep, boop, baby, beep, beep, beep, boop.
	And sometimes she'll do a video and she's dressed in lingerie, the H3H hatter on, and she'll be doing the voice of a child.
	So the little kid will be saying something like, I can't find my glasses.
	You know where my glasses are?
	And then she'll be like, and put them on.
	And it's like, is this pedophilia school?
	Yeah.
	I looked at her once because we were talking about her last week.
	And now she comes up in my feed, and I'm like, get her out of here.
	It's pedophilia training.
	It's dark.
	Pull her up.
	That's the same shit as like in Japan.
	Yeah, exactly.
	I think these Gen Z's millennials, they've been so influenced by anime that now they're into fucking 12-year-old girls.
	It's like the anime comic book.
	I was in Japan a few times and they would literally be like middle-aged businessmen sitting there reading these backwards comic books that are all about like fucking young girls.
	And it's like, what you know, I would always own it.
	believe it or not, I don't approve.
	But don't pull up the HBH.
	Pull up any of her like TikTok things.
	I always feel bad that I'm not like a masculine fucking samurai guy.
	And I'm like, I'm Japanese, and I don't know any of that culture.
	And I feel really bad.
	And then I'm like looking at Japanese people.
	I'm like, neither are they.
	I mean, they're all just business guys whacking off the cartoons.
	Even the Yakuza.
	I feel like smoke is.
	When I see the Yakuza, I feel the same way I do about female MMA fighters.
	I feel like I could probably kick your ass.
	I actually was in a fight one time on a train platform in Japan.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Ooh, that's a good story.
	Already, we don't need any more than that.
	I've been to Japan three times.
	And we were having a heavy session out drinking in Roppongi.
	As one does.
	Yeah, of course.
	When is Roppongi?
	Who is the Romans do?
	And we were on the train platform, and the guy, you know, he had typical traits of, I don't want to say he was Yakuza or anything, but he had a punch perm, the glass.
	Well, the tattoos are a giveaway, and they're missing a finger.
	Well, not all of them.
	But the punch perm is a big hairstyle that a lot of the gangsters wore.
	Right.
	And I ended up getting into a little scuffle.
	I was kind of pissed off because I was actually wearing a suit at the time.
	And during our scuffle, we had fallen on the platform and I tore the knee of my suit.
	Wait, what started it all, though?
	I guess he didn't like that I was with a couple of Japanese girls.
	And he was, you know, there's certain words you hear, like, you know, Bakagaiji is like a stupid foreigner.
	So I was like, well, that's the way you feel.
	So you heard Bakagachi, and you said, what the fuck did you just say?
	Baka means stupid, and Gaijin means foreigner.
	Ooh, look at you.
	Yeah.
	Wait, those guys you just showed, that's not the Yakuza.
	That's a whole other subculture.
	They also go by the Hachikus-san, the 893, is another nickname for the Yakuza.
	Now, do they do anything?
	Like, do they kill people?
	They don't seem like they do.
	Well, those body type tattoos right there, because at one point in Japan, tattooing was illegal.
	So where it's opened, it's called a bodysuit.
	So if they had their shirt unbuttoned, you wouldn't see the tattoos.
	And they stopped like mid-forearm.
	So if they're wearing shirts with the sleeve coat, you won't see them.
	Because it was illegal.
	But, you know, part of their culture is like, you know, the more badass you are, the more tattoos and stuff you have.
	So how did the fight go?
	So you said you had a problem, and then was there a shove?
	Well, I don't know how much English he spoke, but I think you called me a stupid foreigner.
	You called him a fucking nip.
	Well, yeah, kind of.
	Talked about.
	And then there was shoving.
	Like, come on, we need the nip shop.
	There was, you know, fist-a-cuffs.
	And fist-a-chops.
	Yeah, and we locked up.
	Was he a good fighter?
	Well, at the time, I was probably mid to late 20, 26, 27.
	And he was probably in late 30s, early 40s.
	But he was, you know, he's a small guy in stature.
	And not that I'm a big guy.
	I'm 5'6 ⁇ .
	So what were the punches like?
	Was it punches to the head kind of thing or more wrestling?
	And then I rolled over on top of him.
	I got up, and then he just got up and ran.
	But then I was like, oh man, he's probably going to get some other dudes.
	Because I didn't know how long I was waiting for the train.
	So what'd you do then?
	Just left the train station?
	No, no, I just hung out.
	I mean, I was there with the girl I was dating and a couple of her friends.
	And did that make her horny that you beat up a Yakuza dude?
	No, she was probably mad at me.
	Oh.
	Did you guys fuck that night?
	I can't recall.
	To be honest with you, I don't recall.
	No, we did.
	My fucking Indian wife gets so horny anytime there's anything remotely violent in my life that it's disturbing.
	Well, being a protector is a trait that women look for.
	But I think Indians are especially bad.
	Because I remember when we were in Vancouver, British Columbia once, these Indian girls were coming up to us because there's lots of Indians there, almost as many as blacks in America.
	Yeah.
	Feather.
	Or die.
	Feather or dot.
	Feather.
	Okay.
	And they're really flirtatious.
	And sitting on your lap and stuff and playing with your glasses and high and running.
	And you go, did I become Brad Pitt at some point?
	And then you realize, oh, it's to make their boyfriends mad so they'll come over and fight.
	Fight.
	Okay.
	It's like a sexy thing.
	I guess that's with blacks too.
	It doesn't seem like a sexy thing.
	Nothing wrong with that.
	That's like a sexy thing.
	But yeah, they definitely want to see that their man will stick up and defend them.
	The Native American fight.
	He got Maggie Longclaws pregnant.
	He who gets pounded into the ground.
	My wife dated a guy, an Indian guy, whose last name was Mankiller.
	Damn.
	Is that the coolest last name in the world?
	It's the Mankiller.
	Ow.
	Those are terrible amateur fucking punches.
	My Rwanda, huh?
	Yeah, man.
	Marawanda?
	I already told you, Mother.
	Focus that fucking IP, bitch.
	And fuck Indian power.
	Let me get up.
	Huh?
	Get up.
	Indian pride on my bitch.
	Gee, do it.
	Hold on, buddy.
	That's not Michael Jordan, is it?
	23, yeah.
	Yeah, it is.
	That's Mr. Jordan.
	Michael Jordan's Indian?
	This is an old clip, so he was.
	Hold on, buddy.
	Get my shoes.
	He fucking sneaking, dog.
	I see you on nobody.
	So Indians, like modern Indians, not have the same thing that Mexicans do?
	Where they're like, yo, bro, you're a fool.
	I hope you cut the fight.
	There's certain tough guy talks, right?
	Like if you see two white guys fighting, they're like, yo, what's up, motherfucker?
	What you gonna do, yo?
	99% of the time, if there's more than 30 seconds of talking, there's not gonna be a fight.
	Oh, I get you.
	What's up?
	You gotta be nuffin' like you want to.
	You tell me?
	You wanna call me out, homie?
	I called you out because I thought you saw your shit.
	You don't think I'd fuck with a Native American.
	I feel like they have like an innate, I'll fuck you up.
	My fucking brother-in-law, he blacks out In fights, and he just doesn't know what happened.
	Oh, no.
	And he murders people.
	Not literally, but he's a bouncer.
	He's a very scary dude.
	He's such a nice dude, too, and that's how you know.
	Don't set him off.
	Because he doesn't want to come back.
	He's got that Wisconsin.
	Hey, Give.
	What's going on?
	How are you doing there, guy?
	Does he live on the res?
	No, no.
	My mother-in-law grew up on the res, but she married a, she was very smart.
	She got scholarships.
	She go to college.
	And then she married a rich white, not a rich white guy, but a very educated white guy.
	He became a professor.
	And then my wife grew up middle class.
	Although her house sucked.
	What are they doing with all their money?
	Professors make good money.
	Yeah.
	Did they get tenure?
	You know what's weird too?
	Because we grew up the same, like blue-collar parents that made money, and then we were middle class.
	But my wife has this weird snob thing that I don't have.
	Like when we were trying to get out of New York City back five years ago, I go, let's go to Long Island.
	She goes, no, I can't say I live in Long Island.
	I'm like, okay, what about Jersey?
	No way am I saying I'm from, and I'm like, you're a fucking squaw.
	Who is going to be cleaning your toilet, Donald Trump?
	Oh, hey.
	You can't say you live on Long Island to whom?
	When is that coming up?
	I live on Long Island.
	Actually, I hear that's a thing.
	It's Long Island.
	I live on Long Island.
	I'm not a big fan of Long Island.
	If it's official.
	You feel a little trapped out there.
	I just don't like the Suffolk and Nassau County police.
	They have real scholars.
	Oh, yeah, you said that before.
	I mean, I get along with a lot of law enforcement, but they don't have to.
	What about South Bronx?
	No problem.
	What about NYPD?
	Like Manhattan?
	No problem.
	Is it possible that Nassau and Suffolk County are just almost as bad as Jersey?
	Jersey state troopers.
	They're just no toys.
	I hate state troopers.
	That's fair.
	You're allowed to hate state troopers.
	Oh, like Jersey is even on some other next-level bullshit.
	So like Newark, Jersey beat cops you hate?
	Not that I would say the beat cops.
	I mean, I've been to Jersey and Newark and Patterson, all throughout the slums and ghettos of Jersey, and never had a problem with them.
	It's only the troopers that ever gave us real problems.
	Yeah, everyone hates state troopers.
	That's the deal.
	You have to choose like Coke, Pepsi, English, French, state troopers, urban cops, firemen cops, Navy, Army.
	You got to choose your side.
	You can't like troopers and MYPD.
	Actually, I had gotten pulled over probably within the last six months.
	I was in Nassau County and I was issued six tickets.
	Wow.
	Although, you know, it was a commercial vehicle, so they didn't write him in my name.
	He was gracious enough to write him into the company name.
	Six tickets.
	Jeez.
	Well, we had a trucker call into the show whose wife's a daughter.
	Fresh direct.
	And he'd been trucking for a while.
	Bringing Fresh Direct to people in a sprinter van.
	He had a little 10-foot cute box truck trucker.
	What a fucking Brendan from Penske.
	Dude, you're lucky you got a rich, smart woman because you're a fucking boob.
	Oh, yeah.
	I'm a trucker.
	Imagine delivering Fresh Direct and calling yourself a trucker.
	Wow.
	Peapot, Fresh Direct.
	Next call.
	Easy Fresh.
	Brian's on the line.
	He's been on the line for nine minutes.
	Welcome, Brian.
	What's going on, Brian?
	Oh, it's Ryan.
	Oh, okay.
	So my family lives just outside Goshen, New York, and my little sister's best friend is in the movie industry.
	Well, she decided she's going to produce and film her own little movie at my parents' farm.
	And had a whole crew come out of New York City.
	They're all people that are professionals.
	I was really astounded at how many lesbians, liberal white young women, and beta males, every single one of them.
	I thought for sure there'd be like one or two gay guys, not one of them.
	I thought maybe a couple manly men, but nope, it was all run by dykes that were just as manly as any one of us.
	They were actually kind of cool to hang out with, but I just couldn't believe that that's like the new New York City TV thing now.
	It's dykes and beta males.
	Yeah, I've noticed that.
	The males, they all have kind of my hairdo beard setup with the glasses.
	They wear cardigans.
	They have skin-tight pants with Clark's desert boots.
	And then the girls, totally different.
	They have headbands.
	They've got the cargo shorts with the hiking boot shoes with the little socks.
	And they have the utility belt with all the tape on it and shit.
	But didn't you notice that the woman would get injured?
	Because they were doing these jobs of like roadies, basically.
	You're a roadie if you're a PA.
	Strips and all that.
	And they'd sprained their ankle and shit.
	You bring that up.
	Yep.
	There was one that just stepped off of my family's quad.
	She was riding on it.
	She just stepped off of it, rolled her ankle, and it was like, shut the whole set down.
	We got an injury.
	They insist on carrying those sandbags, too.
	The sandbags that hold up the lights.
	We've got them right there.
	Tripods and on.
	And they're like, no, I got it.
	I got it.
	And you're like, but you don't got it.
	And there's a hulking dude.
	Maybe that's why you don't have those hulking dudes so much anymore.
	Because they got sick of dealing with the dykes and the beta males.
	More specifically, the dykes.
	They ruin everything with their fucking muscles.
	I don't know.
	I totally agree.
	They do ruin it.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	They have more balls than the beta males, though.
	Yeah, but it's still not a lot of balls.
	No, definitely.
	In the old days, I talked to Amanda Milius a lot, who is she did that movie, The Plot Against the President, and her dad did Dirty Harry.
	And when you think of his films, like the Dirty Harry films.
	Those must have all been Handlebar Mustache fucking dudes.
	Are you feeling lucky punk?
	Yeah.
	I shoot five.
	Imagine those guys on those sets.
	Well, Clint East was a man's man.
	He still is.
	At 85.
	True.
	Although the baby in American Sniper was unforgivable.
	Charles Bronson, though.
	What movie were they filming in Goshen, New York, though?
	Good point.
	I'm trying to think of that.
	I'm like.
	That's my old stomping grounds.
	Oh, yeah.
	It's not too far from Montgomery in Florida.
	I'm 17.
	That's true.
	Close to Monroe.
	Upstate New York has so many, like, I don't want to sound like a snob, but so many lazy pieces of shit.
	The women are so fucking fat.
	There's so many people on welfare.
	I wish you would have been.
	I was hanging out at Walmart for hours at a time.
	You wish what?
	I wish you would have said what the premise of the movie was.
	Like, what the hell were they doing?
	Oh, it's some garbage film.
	The guy who did my movie, Creative Control, he did a movie about these hipsters who go out to rural New York, and there's an apocalypse and Manhattan blows up.
	And then they're stuck out there, and they have to survive.
	Oh.
	It's an easy place to film a movie.
	All right, let's do one more call.
	I think I kind of look like Charles Bronson.
	Well, he's got your chinky eyes, but he's a Slovak like my wife.
	Yeah.
	Really?
	Interesting dude.
	He started his career and they went, you look too weird.
	So he actually went back to Czechoslovakia and started a film career there and then he had a background and then when he came back they went okay I get it now.
	The Death Wish series.
	You're a weird Spovak.
	And now, like that dude kind of started the whole franchise of you killed my wife and kids.
	Vigilante Justice.
	Which is like that's dad porn.
	Yeah.
	What was it?
	Vigilante?
	Then Vigilante 2, 3.
	Every movie, all my favorite movies are like anyone fucking with anyone's kids.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, they killed his wife and kids and he went on the Vigilante rampage.
	Yeah.
	I just watched one the other day.
	Nice.
	When was it?
	I'm trying to see John Wick.
	I still haven't seen that.
	In that movie, they killed his puppy.
	Yeah, that's right.
	Which is like, go fuck yourself.
	That wife died.
	His wife died.
	That guy was John Wick 4 is coming out.
	I can't wait to catch up on all of them.
	But John Wick 1, if he's waiting for somebody to just kill his daughter.
	These guys are so different in size, they look like two different species.
	Is this the Star Wars movie?
	Start men in black, actually.
	Is this Groot?
	Four feet long and they wobble this way.
	Either one's a giant or one's a midget.
	Yeah.
	Is one closer and one far away?
	But it was such beautiful.
	Dick Kavan's like, yeah, we have a weird couch here.
	All those clothes.
	That clothing on.
	Used to train, you'd jump on train cars, like box cars.
	My friend lost his leg.
	You know, we used to just fuck around and find out.
	But otherwise, it was beautiful and nice.
	Yeah, we love the country.
	I was watching movie.
	Anyway, so we got another caller on the line.
	Alright, one more.
	Tony, Tony, Tony.
	You're on the line.
	Tony Bologna, Fifa Phony, Tony.
	No, Tony.
	Oh, wait.
	That's a pretty anticlimactic ending.
	Hold on a second.
	Yikes.
	What a shit is.
	Hey, what's up, Gavin?
	Hey, Tony, Tony, Tony.
	Wait, this is Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
	Tony, Tony.
	Hey, hey, thank you, Maddie, for being on the show.
	You're an excellent addition to the show.
	Thank you, I appreciate it.
	I'm not that important, but Gavin, prompting real quick.
	I'm surprised you haven't mentioned Josh Taylor, one of the greatest Scottish boxers around, you know.
	And he's a great boxer.
	I'm surprised you haven't mentioned him.
	But what else?
	Have your boy Spark already at your gym?
	And besides that, I had a thing with my boy, my youngest boy, won a national tournament, and we were going to put a censor TV logo on his trunks.
	And I ran it by a couple people, and I ran it by my wife, and she said, hey, don't do that.
	He's going to get canceled just like Gavin.
	So he won't get to the state.
	How old is your boy?
	He won the belt.
	How old is your boy?
	He's nine years old, 70 pounds.
	Nine years old.
	He's 70 pounds.
	He won the Nebraska Buffalo Bill Brawl tournament last weekend.
	It's a USA boxing sanctioned tournament, and he won.
	And I have a video of him saying something pretty funny.
	Are you Mexican?
	Yeah, yeah, Mikey from L.A. Remember Mikey, he was talking about the gang violence with your blacks.
	Oh, yeah.
	I'm Brian's buddy.
	You know what?
	My eldest boy gave up on boxing and he went to baseball very quickly.
	And then my youngest boy, he was too young for baseball.
	And he did the exercises, whatever.
	We went there every week.
	And he just, it didn't look like he was into it.
	He had no interest.
	And I introduced him to baseball like this year.
	And he was like, fuck boxing, let's do baseball.
	But even that being said, I don't see him sparring.
	Like at my gym, kids don't spar until they're maybe like 10, 11, 12.
	And if he was winning tournaments at eight or nine, he must have started sparring at like 7, right?
	My boy started at 8, and my youngest boy before him is 6.
	He just turned 6, and he's sparring with 8 or 9 year old people.
	But we're spits.
	We're beaners.
	So they fight in the house for pancake.
	Dude, you guys are...
	What is with Mexicans and the no defense thing?
	You guys don't move from punches.
	You just take them in the head.
	Body shots.
	Body shots.
	You know, but I wanted to put the censor TV logo on our trunks, but my wife watches your show with me and she said, oh, hell no.
	We're not getting fucking canceled like Gabino.
	Well, maybe you could have like a secret code, like get fired or something on his trunks.
	I'll pay for it.
	Yeah, man.
	We'll hide his name.
	Thank you guys for the show.
	And Matty's awesome.
	You're awesome, guys.
	Thank you, guys.
	Thanks for calling, Essay.
	You gotta be proud of you, boys.
	Masaquionda.
	Masaquionda.
	All right, that's it.
	We're five minutes over.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	Never mind.
	I was saying Tony's back.
	Okay, let's take Tony.
	Let's get Tony.
	Let's get it.
	Thank you, Tony.
	Tony.
	Tony.
	Hey, you there?
	Hey, what's up?
	You there?
	Yes, sir.
	Your two favorite meals.
	Mints and tatties.
	She had two last days.
	Maddie and I have the exact same taste in food.
	It's all Scottish.
	Fucking mint pies.
	Meat pies with beans and HP sauce or just raw.
	Yeah.
	Fucking or cold or frozen or shit out of a dead dog.
	Meat pies.
	Pull up a mince pie.
	That!
	There it is.
	Oh my God.
	I'm going to come.
	Okay.
	That is the greatest food on earth.
	Grown up on it.
	Did you really?
	Top left picture.
	HP sauce.
	That's like Canadian A1 sauce or something like that, or Canadian Heinz 57, right?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Similar.
	Why are you asking about my favorite food?
	You got big plans?
	Well, you've never talked about food, I think, in the 3000s.
	That's so true.
	You have a dispassionate favor.
	Well, I'm Scottish, so my mother would make just garbage.
	When I was a kid, my mother would make like four potatoes, one piece of lettuce, and like a sliver of beef.
	It was the Great Depression every night.
	So after dinner, I would make a bowl of popcorn like this that was the size of a basketball.
	And then my dad would get in there with his fucking greedy gorbel's hands, and he would somehow manage to like pull out a human head of my popcorn bowl until I was left with the butterless shit at the bottom.
	Then I'd have like two apples and I'd have four bowls of ice cream just trying to stay alive.
	Oh my God, that is fucking good.
	That's heaven on earth right there.
	Look at those labia on that meat.
	Oh, it's pretty funny.
	Scottish cuisine is horrible.
	It is.
	When my mother's family, my family would come over to visit, and when they started seeing the size of the sandwiches that you would get served in America, because if you ordered a ham and cheese sandwich or your wife made your ham and cheese, it would be one slice of ham, one slice of cheese,
	and two pieces of bread, and that's it.
	Nothing else.
	Yeah.
	And another favorite meal of ours is the mince and taries, which is basically poor people who's chopped meat.
	It's minced meat with a bunch of vegetables and mashed potatoes mixed together.
	Mince and tallies.
	It's shepherd's pie, really.
	It's just shepherd's pie.
	Deconstructed, though.
	But in the pan.
	But what's that site, Ayrshire.com, where we ordered, I ordered a bunch of those pies, and they were like $8 each.
	Oh, that was a good one.
	By the time they finally get shipped to you?
	Ackroy's?
	Aykroy's Bakery.
	Okay, I see.
	Yeah, why do you ask, sir?
	Well, I'm Scott, Scotch-Irish also.
	So I just wondered if that was because I like those two.
	But Zap, Ryan, look up Zap American Gladiators.
	I lost my virginity to her in regards to masturbation when I was 13, 14 years old.
	That's going back.
	So you're a fag.
	She's a muscle-bound gal, but she is hot.
	And in 1993, 94, I think she was on the show.
	Did you ever watch this guy?
	You sound a lot like someone I know, sir.
	He's got one of those voices.
	Oh, dude, she's not bad for bodybuilding.
	Six voice that was on earlier.
	That was a muscle girl back in college.
	Fucking hottest voice.
	Okay, that's not gross.
	No one doesn't want to fuck that.
	Those are like fitness models.
	Yeah, that's just a woman who's healthy and works out in jogs and stuff.
	That's not like dude arms.
	Yeah, the one on the right in the white, this is that picture, she was kind of thick.
	Yeah, you're allowed to beat off to that.
	That's perfectly legal.
	Oh, yeah.
	And she's got the standex on and zap and gladiator.
	She's muscle-bound.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling, Tony.
	I'll see you soon.
	All right.
	I know that, dude.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave and never stop fighting.

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