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Sept. 21, 2019 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:26:51

GOML LIVE #13 | THE FIVE TYPES OF ANTIFA

After checking in on possibly the biggest loser in the world, we go through the latest news including El Chapo's dead lover, Justin Trudeau in blackface, #MeToo, and Lilly Singh's horrible new show. Then, we talk to callers but not before breaking down the five levels of antifa which goes from the bottom (the orphans) to the top (the billionaires).

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	Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes. it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
	Are we gonna get in trouble for using that on YouTube? - If this is, If this is going to be a free episode.
	Yeah, Thursdays are free.
	Okay.
	Then yes.
	You know why Thursdays are free?
	Dumbass, not prepared guy who's late.
	Uh, because the sponsors get, you know, 350,000 on YouTube and then my telegram and my parlor and then free speech.
	Oh, I see.
	So it's worth it for the- We get to charge more money!
	For them peeps.
	We get more money!
	I love money!
	I love money!
	Is that your new character, Money Guy?
	Money Guy!
	That's- I'm gonna do that at my SNL audition.
	So I have another one, Lorne, it's called Money Guy.
	I'll just jump right into it.
	I love money!
	Yeah, gimme money!
	Uh, that's all I got for him.
	I thought of him on the way over here.
	That's pretty great.
	I like it.
	I do a Scottish guy.
	Hello, I'm a Scottish guy!
	Uh, I do a guy named Miles.
	What's going on, you guys?
	I can do British accents.
	Hello, what you doing?
	And then even like, hello, hello.
	So, do I got the gig?
	Uh, let's try the Scottish guy being money guy.
	Okay, I love money!
	Oh, that's great.
	It's about money, pal.
	That's great.
	Get some money, big man!
	You're hired.
	I should warn you though, if you were to go through any of my old tweets or podcasts, they are tiny bit racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, Islamophobic, ageist, sizeist.
	Actually, I'm not ageist.
	It's easier to list the things I'm not.
	Yeah, that's a shorter list.
	Yeah.
	Are you a bigot?
	Which I'm not an ageist.
	I'm not a bigot, but I'm not a smallet either.
	Yeah, like a Jussie Smollett.
	Don't do puns for the entire show, please.
	The entire?
	Okay, that's tough.
	No more puns.
	And no more abbreviating things or changing things to acronyms.
	That's not funny.
	I'll say things like, I have to go, and you go, U-H-T-G.
	How is that a joke or anything?
	I don't know, I think it's a sign of depression or something.
	Yeah, now that I can digest.
	So my reaction when you do those, I should go, oh, fuck, man.
	Sorry to hear that.
	Oh, nothing's ready.
	You don't got the wide.
	You're gonna cross the camera now.
	We should be honest and tell you the truth.
	The truth is we pre-taped something for today's show called The Five Levels of Antifa.
	I broke this down on Infowars recently, but I thought it'd be good to do a formal segment because it's important that people understand America's enemies.
	All right, that's a little bright, but okay.
	So the categories are, starting from the bottom, the orphan losers that they sort of pick up off the street.
	And then there's the rich professor's kids.
	These are the ones who wear black.
	Five and four.
	Then number three are the lesbian lawyers who administrate the whole thing.
	Wait a minute.
	I'm missing a category.
	There's the orphans, the professor's kids.
	Oh yeah.
	The shot callers.
	Yeah.
	Category three are the ones who, who are out there at the rallies.
	They don't look like Antifa and they say, everyone go over there, go attack that guy.
	So there's sort of like the generals, the lieutenants, whatever.
	Um, we have Joe Biggs on the show today.
	He'll be explaining a better name for that.
	Remind me to, to ask that, like, I don't, I don't get the, what's a general, what's a lieutenant, what's a captain.
	I don't know.
	So he'll help us with that because he's one of the military guys.
	God, I was getting on his nerves recently.
	We were at this party and he has a purple heart because they blew up his Humvee and he went flying through the airline on his side.
	They were shooting at him and he almost died.
	And I said, let's cut the shit, Joe.
	You had a car accident.
	That's terrible.
	I know.
	And he would laugh, but you could see part of him sort of like... Because he has PTSD.
	Or another one, another fun thing you do to military guys that drives them nuts is you go, how do I know you're not stolen valor?
	What battalion were you in?
	And they always say like third battalion, fourth deployment, blah, blah, blah, XR3, like all these details.
	And you go, there is no third battalion.
	That makes them mad.
	They laugh.
	But they're also starting to get mad.
	You'll notice when they're talking, you look down and you'll see the hand just sort of go like that.
	Ready.
	Clench up.
	Ready for a pop on the chin.
	So we'll have Joe on the show.
	We're having Joe on the show to welcome aboard FreeSpeech.TV.
	New show, Biggs.
	So it's our third new contributor.
	We're becoming a platform, not a publisher.
	Or is it a publisher, not a platform?
	Facebook and Twitter, they like to change it, depending.
	If they're in trouble, then they say, we're just a platform.
	People say shit.
	And then if they want to, you know, meddle with the election, they say, oh, we're a publisher.
	We're cutting out this guy and this guy and this guy.
	Something weird's happening to my YouTube, by the way.
	I haven't gone up in subscribers, despite having maybe a million views since I was last at 350k.
	So they've somehow frozen that.
	That's mean, and it's officially cheating, you guys!
	People have been unsubscribed from things as well.
	Oh yeah, against their will?
	That happens, yep.
	People wouldn't call and go, hey man, I unsubscribed from you, and then I checked and I was unsubscribed.
	What the fuck?
	Can you straighten that monitor, dude?
	God, you're such a young person.
	I thought you were Asian.
	You guys are supposed to be perfectionists.
	I'm gonna get Shane Gillis in here to hurl racial epithets at your face if you don't smarten up.
	I would just join him and not feel anything.
	We should explain our opening song because it was horrible, of course.
	It's a guy I'm obsessed with, one of my favorite guys.
	I actually recently sent this guy to Fred Armisen, suggesting that maybe he's not exaggerating enough when he does these characters because reality is trumping him.
	This guy I like to call in your face, Fred Armisen.
	This guy is a human fuck you to Fred Armisen.
	Okay, turn it up.
	Bacon wrapped bratwurst with Swiss cheese.
	That sounds actually kind of delicious.
	Like the problem with hot dogs is people use cheap cheese when they put cheese on them.
	So he's listening to industrial music, eating a sauerkraut Swiss cheese hot dog.
	This isn't a joke.
	He's not doing a character.
	He lives in a trailer.
	His videos all have about 10 views.
	Why don't you recline a little bit, pull back, Ryan, and we can see.
	I don't like when you hide the details.
	So this calls me listening to W. Pooch and eating.
	And what's the name of this guy?
	Nate Ober.
	Nate Ober!
	One comment, 12 views.
	And that's my comment.
	Oh, really?
	What's the name of this track?
	Do you think he's a pill head?
	I don't know.
	I call this depression porn.
	Well, if you take opioids like Xanax and stuff, you tend not to have an appetite.
	Same with speed, actually.
	Uppers and downers, you tend not to eat.
	So I guess pot.
	Maybe he's a pothead?
	Maybe.
	He's a pothead.
	He's allegedly a pothead industrial dude who lives in his trailer.
	They could be straight edge, too.
	A lot of weirdos are straight edge.
	And that adds to their weirdest mental illness.
	Look, he eats the side there.
	You think he's eating sauerkraut?
	I think he just took a bite out of the side of the bun.
	Mmm, yeah.
	You know that bubble chew that's all coiled up?
	Yeah.
	You pull it out.
	I bet he bites it like a hamburger.
	That's nihilistic.
	What a weirdo.
	I love him.
	What an awesome weirdo.
	I think he watches the show because the way you found him was he edited your green screen thing.
	I think I'm gonna get banned off YouTube soon.
	He took that and then green screened you into that like weird industrial- BlueChew.com!
	is a place where you can get a free sample.
	It's got the same ingredients as Viagra and Cialis, or as someone I heard was arrested recently, I heard a cop tell me that he kept talking about Sierra.
	He was like, yo, niggas gotta get on Sierra and they can get it up whenever they want.
	You pop one of them Sierras.
	Am I allowed to use a racial epithet when I'm quoting a person of color?
	Am I gonna get Shane Gillist?
	By the way, maybe we should have some greatest hits from the week because this one's free and people should probably, you know what we should do?
	Let's pull up Some of that Shane Gillis video.
	Not right now.
	Okay.
	But Shane Gillis is spooky.
	You should also pull up the spooky thing so people know what I'm talking about.
	He made a spooky video in August of 2018 that predicted his firing and predicted a firehouse getting shut down.
	And the top comment on the video...
	Makes reference to SNL, and it's all from a year ago.
	Spooky!
	By the way, you keep wanting to do buttons, audio buttons.
	We'll allow it if there's video.
	Right.
	You may do video buttons.
	I don't know if anybody's had that.
	Like that nerdy dude, Jesse Waters, who, didn't he cheat on his wife with some intern?
	Yeah, he does things like, hey, we're talking to people today about Trump's wall, and then he'll cut to some Mel Brooks movie going, a wall?
	Who's got a wall?
	What are you talking about?
	You know what I mean?
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	It's so corny.
	It's always like Fast Times at Richmond High.
	These kids are getting stoned.
	Hey, Mr. Hand.
	Right.
	Then back to the guy.
	But if we do it, it won't be corny for some reason.
	Yes, B-L-U-E-C-H-E-W dot com.
	Use promo code Gavin to try it for free.
	So this is a blue pill you carry with you at all times.
	If you're married, you can remember what it was like when you had the coconut smashers you used to have when you were 14.
	If you're a single gentleman, And you maybe party a little too hard, and you get Mrs. Right home, you have one chance.
	One chance with her.
	And if you blow it, you're done forever.
	So why not have insurance?
	Say, hypothetically, Jessica Simpson divorces her husband, and she's not too plump, but she's not too skinny.
	And you meet her at a party, and she's like, I just want to be normal.
	I just want to have fun with a normal, ugly, fat guy like you.
	Let's go home.
	And you'd obviously be nervous, and no one's gonna fault you for being nervous.
	When you're nervous and you're overthinking, sometimes you're dude, and you are not the best of friends.
	And believe me, I've been in situations where I'm like, I've been with you every day, we've been through thick and thin, and right now, at the most important time ever, you're gonna just leave?
	Fuck you.
	Like, I've wanted to fight him.
	I've wanted to cut him off, put him in an enlarging machine, and then just spar.
	With Blue Chew, you don't have to beat up your dick.
	You don't have to hate him.
	He will be on your side.
	That is B-L-U-E-C-H-E-W dot com promo code Gavin.
	Try it for free.
	I'm trying to get these sponsors out of the way early.
	But I'm going to tell you what you have on the show so you don't leave me.
	Ryan and I wrote some Puerto Rican pop music during the week that we'll be playing.
	My parents came to visit the set, which was kind of annoying, which you'll have to dig up.
	We also Lilly Singh has a phenomenally bad new show called A Little Late where all she does is go, can you believe it?
	Look, I'm brown and I'm on your TV.
	You must be freaking out.
	And everyone's at home eating a sauerkraut Swiss cheese hot dog going, what?
	I feel the exact same way, by the way.
	This is how I feel about gays and trans and your bathrooms.
	I don't give a shit.
	Iraq and, no sorry, Iran and Saudi Arabia are in a fight.
	Can't they both lose?
	Go ahead guys, turn each other to glass.
	I don't give a flying fuck.
	I really honestly don't care.
	And I'm sick of trying to care.
	It's just not there.
	Again, it's like, say you lived on a planet where everyone was gay, and you're like, I better get gay!
	And you have a penis and you go, ah!
	I'm sorry, let me try one more time.
	No, I'm not trying anymore.
	I want them to wipe each other.
	It's sort of like World War II.
	You know, the conceit is that Britain and USA had to go there to save the day, to prevent the Holocaust, and to kill the Nazis.
	Then I read The Unnecessary War by Pat Buchanan, which is meticulously researched, involves dozens and dozens of other books, and basically he says we shouldn't have gotten involved.
	It was like a scorpion and a cobra, Stalin and Hitler, and they're just both too vicious to have mass appeal.
	So Stalin would have, Hitler would have gone east, Stalin would have tried to fight him, and just fascism and communism would have went...
	And died.
	Maybe Hitler would have won.
	But fascism doesn't last.
	Because it's very parochial.
	A German fascist hates a Spanish fascist.
	They're not friends.
	In fact, when Churchill declared war on Nazi Germany and said, I'm getting involved, the head of the British fascist party said, I'm with you, Churchill.
	Let's do this.
	Let's crush those Germans.
	So people are much more, they have much more allegiance to their own country than they do to some fucking Made up belief system like fascism.
	So fascism could have eradicated communism and then it just would have died a scorpion death out east in the snow.
	And we'd have no North Korea.
	China would be fucked.
	We'd have a beautiful Russia.
	Free market Russia.
	Way to go, Churchill, you big fat drunk potato.
	And so we have a second chance to leave people to their own devices.
	Let's do it.
	You can rebuild all the drones you want.
	I don't care.
	What else was in the news today?
	Oh, we got Justin Trudeau in blackface.
	We'll be focusing mostly on how hot this chick is in the photo, but also talking about blackface.
	I don't get what's so bad about it.
	Tekashi69, we already talked about him.
	And then just a bunch of boring crap.
	Oh yeah, El Chapo's chick, we'll be talking about her too.
	She got shot.
	El Chapo's chick!
	I wish I could have a Chapo's chick.
	I kind of like a Chapo's chick.
	Where can I find a... He just keeps dying.
	It's just easier to kill her, I guess.
	Right.
	Didn't that bug you in Scarface?
	Where he kills that guy for dating his sister?
	Oh, his best friend, yeah.
	Hey Scarface, fuck you.
	You were successful for what, two years dealing coke?
	You're very, very successful.
	But that's nothing to look up to.
	Hey, make $15 million a month for two years, then shoot all your friends and die.
	Yeah, not worth it.
	Loser.
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	It's probably very profitable to bet on the Mets these days.
	We won last night, by the way.
	I did not bet.
	Go to that page, that's a good ad.
	I did not bet on the Mets game last night.
	I had kind of given up on my team.
	They say it's an acronym for must end the season, just like the Jets are just end the season.
	But every once in a while we pull it out of our buns.
	As long as we don't have Diaz closing.
	Diaz, I hate your guts.
	I hate your face.
	I hate your ears.
	I hate your family.
	I hate your car.
	I hate your house.
	If anyone out there wants to buy me the Mets, I will pay you back by getting rid of Diaz the following day.
	You know who I'll trade him for?
	Anyone in the fucking MLB.
	Anyone at all.
	And then finally, before we start the show, I want to recommend Johnny Apple CBD.
	It's a CBD company that's a little play on Johnny Appleseed, and you can go check them out right now at J-A-C-B-D dot com.
	What are you doing, Ryan, Katsu, Rivera?
	Looking it up.
	Well, you could just use the URL that I just said.
	JohnnyApple.com.
	Nope.
	J-A-C-B-D dot com.
	But it also works.
	Oh, okay.
	JohnnyApple.com also works?
	Yes.
	It's good to know.
	Good to know.
	Johnny Apple is the most trusted brand in CBD since 2015.
	American-made products with third-party lab testing.
	I mean, they say here it's a most trusted brand.
	As far as I'm concerned, it's the most trusted brand.
	And I use it as an ointment for my sore muscles.
	I know I told you I was going to start taking HGH to get ripped, because I'm sick of my body being upside down.
	I have the legs.
	From the hips down, I'm Superman.
	My legs are breathtakingly gorgeous.
	The waist up, I'm Grover.
	And I'm in the gym, sparring with these guys.
	And every time I punch someone that's like in their 30s, they say, good.
	I don't want that anymore.
	I want them to go, what the fuck?
	Like when I'm done sparring, my forehead, the skin hurts.
	Like I push on my forehead and it hurts.
	They bruise the skin here.
	I want to bruise someone's skin.
	I'm sick of getting encouraged by young men in the gym.
	I'm actually considering making a sign for my gym that I hang on the ropes that says, no young people.
	Because I'll be there with my old timers, my fellow 50 year olds, and we're... One of them goes, you need a cigarette?
	As I'm wheezing.
	I go low, and I do get one in the body, but then I can't see.
	And he just reaches down and starts nailing me.
	But then the youngsters will go, hey, mind if I move around with you?
	And you can't say no, because that's a pussy move.
	So I'll go, yeah, sure, you can come in after I've had two rounds that are two and a half minutes long and I'm about to die of AIDS.
	Sure, come on in and beat me up.
	And they come in and they're just, it's just a human punching bag.
	I'm gonna practice punching an old man.
	Remember those torsos they have that are just a torso with the head?
	Bob, yeah.
	That's what us old seniors are to these youngsters.
	I'm going to try out my moves on an old mannequin.
	Well, I won't be an old mannequin for long.
	I'm taking HGH.
	Anyway, I also take CBD for sore.
	We did like 9 billion push-ups yesterday, and this whole area feels like it's been stabbed.
	So you put CBD oil on it as it's inflamed, as it hurts.
	It makes a huge difference.
	The next day, it's gone.
	It's sort of like you ever get a sunburn, and you put aloe on the sunburn?
	Like, take an aloe plant, split it open, open it, put it right on the red part, like your shins or your feet or whatever got burnt, and you have it there for a couple hours?
	The sunburn's not better.
	It's gone.
	This is as magic as an aloe plant.
	Johnny Apple's CBD will give you the greatest sleep of your life, help alleviate your anxiety, reduce your stress, and is great for athletic recovery.
	CBD is a great anti-inflammatory, as I just mentioned.
	Use the ointment after a workout, as I just did.
	Or a long day defending yourself against Antifa.
	You can get worn out fighting Antifa just because it hurts your fists.
	And it hurts your inner arms.
	It also hurts your eyes if they spray you with it.
	But you never get a black eye.
	Has anyone ever got a black eye from Antifa?
	Not that I know of.
	They don't give black eyes and they don't have black guys.
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	Support free speech businesses.
	Support the show.
	We're done with ads.
	Now, this is all freedom.
	We're done with the newspaper.
	You don't have to see the New York Post.
	We've already described the intro.
	It's time to start the show.
	I'd like you to get a hold of Joe Biggs, our new contributor.
	Let's put his show up tomorrow.
	Dash what's ups.
	On the site.
	That's gonna be what's ups.
	Yo, yo, what's up?
	So, what we do have though, we posted a clip, you talking about Lilly Singh, the white noise from yesterday.
	No, no, we are scheduled at 2.30 for Bigs.
	I know, I'm just telling the people what they do have upload-wise today in this world.
	I already told them we're gonna do Lilly Singh.
	Okay.
	Are you watching the show?
	Yep.
	Are you a participant?
	Are you a participant?
	I'm a participant.
	I sound like Ronnie the limo driver when he says cheeks.
	Yeah, take the butter and let it melt down your cheeks.
	Chirks.
	Wait, is that Stern?
	Uh-huh.
	I'm an Open Anthony guy.
	Open Anthony.
	Open Anthony's not on.
	Stern's on.
	Well, he's... I listen to Stern every morning.
	And he frustrates the living shit out of me.
	He's very opinionated and totally uninformed.
	So he'll tell you all about the New York Times and Kavanaugh, and then when it turns out that the New York Times was wrong, he'll just go, let's cut to our sponsor, Untuckit.
	Kavanaugh wouldn't have had trouble if he was wearing an Untuckit shirt.
	He does not have the courage of his convictions.
	That's what happens with these guys when they get rich.
	Jimmy Kimmel is an awesome guy.
	Great guy.
	Huge pothead.
	Kind of mean, which is a crucial part of being funny.
	But these guys get money and all they want to do is make their second wife happy.
	And their second wives want to be invited to all the great dinner parties.
	That's why they are attracted to a famous guy like Sterner Kimmel.
	Because I can go have dinner with Sacha Baron Cohen and Jennifer Aniston.
	Great.
	Now, what do the hosts of these dinner parties want?
	They want you to hate Trump.
	That's their agenda.
	They want to save the animals, like Howard Stern's wife, but they also want to kill Trump.
	So if you're pro-Trump or even remotely right-wing, you're not invited to the dinner party.
	Your second wife's unhappy.
	You're miserable.
	Happy wife, happy life.
	So Stern just goes, fuck Trump.
	So does every late night host.
	Including the Canadian bisexual Sikh, Lilly Singh, who is rocking the late night world with her controversial comedy based on looking at her face and going, wow, you don't look like Johnny Carson.
	That's it.
	That's a hundred percent of her schtick.
	I don't look like your average talk show host.
	Instead of just being funny.
	Like, imagine being a short Asian in the NBA and you were just like, can you believe this shit?
	I'm 5'5".
	Not your average... Whoa!
	Oh, the ball's gone.
	Tall guy took it.
	What is taking you so long?
	To do what?
	To call Joe Biggs.
	Oh, I thought you were referencing other stuff.
	He's right here.
	Well, get him on the show.
	I'm killing time here.
	Oh.
	I can't hear him.
	Can you hear me now, Joe?
	Can you see what I hear?
	That was a very popular 70s movie about a blind guy.
	Here we go.
	Oh, you had the wrong setting?
	Hey Joe, you there?
	No, it's just I'm changing it.
	Can you hear me, Joe?
	Doesn't look like he can hear me, man.
	Have you muted something, Ryan?
	Nope.
	There we go.
	Oh, you can hear me?
	Oh, good.
	You know, it's funny when there's technical difficulties like this, I physically beat Ryan.
	So what you think is just some fun glitch is like a major fist about to come down on a young man.
	You're just like, oh, it's working.
	That's cool.
	But someone just dodged a bullet.
	Well, I don't have anybody to throw this grenade, and if I did, I would.
	Oh, that's a live grenade?
	Well, I haven't pulled a pin.
	But it is a pinned grenade you could kill someone with.
	Well, definitely, yeah.
	You know, it would be awesome if you, on your last show, and if you are going to kill yourself, I don't want you to kill yourself, obviously, but if you were to, on your last show, just to pull the pin and say, Bye, motherfuckers!
	Okay. - Right?
	So let's call your show Biggs.
	For some reason there's a massive echo right now.
	Oh, it's echoing?
	Yeah, and there's a brutal lag on the fucking interview.
	This sucks.
	And we're introducing Joe to the network in a laggy, echoey, shitty way.
	Why don't we quit Skype and call him back?
	All right.
	All right, let's do that.
	Let's try that.
	Okay.
	That was embarrassing.
	What a pathetic debut.
	But that's the problem with live television.
	You have to take the crunchy with the smooth, I suppose, as Joe Biggs said.
	I've got a very important message.
	Joe Biggs is Skyping me in.
	Um... I guess I should just remove Skype from my phone, but sometimes I need it when I'm on the road.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's gonna be necessary.
	You know what we could do while we get set up?
	You could play our hit Puerto Rican song.
	We were listening to K-pop and we were listening to Tekashi 6ix9ine, whatever his name is.
	The guy's facing 47 years for drug trafficking and gun laundering.
	And we were listening to his Puerto Rican hits and we realized you don't need to know Spanish to make a Puerto Rican hit.
	So we did a song off the cuff And then a viewer made a video for it.
	So this is Puerto Millaya, Mi Amore, by me and Gavin Tuchauden.
	Gavin Trojaden and that Asian Chinko Productions.
	A little basic.
	It's basic.
	Ooh.
	It's bassy.
	They changed it to sound like it's in a club.
	Oh, I get it.
	You're a good hype man.
	Thank you.
	A diverse club.
	You're a good hype man.
	Thank you.
	Great.
	Diverse club.
	That flopped.
	What?
	I don't know.
	That sounded like shit.
	We kept cutting in and out of it.
	That was a bomb.
	Okay.
	That wasn't good.
	We won't do that again.
	That won't be a highlight.
	It's too late.
	This is live.
	We can't edit that out.
	Let's try Joe Biggs again.
	See if he's lagging.
	See if it's sharp.
	See if there's an echo.
	Is there an echo, Joe?
	Nope.
	So we're good to go?
	Yep.
	So Joe, we got a new show, Biggs.
	I want to air it on Sundays, but we don't have anything this Friday, so let's put it up tomorrow, your first episode.
	I just watched it.
	It's epic.
	Good introduction to Joe Biggs.
	You have a purple heart, right?
	Yeah.
	And is there any evidence that what happened with you with the Humvee is actually true?
	Yeah, there's an actual plaque from Barack Obama or George Bush, whichever one, I can't remember, with a signature on it saying that the shit happened to me on September 26th.
	Okay, but we can't see it that well, so that could be anything.
	Yeah, well, it is what it is.
	You'll just have to trust me, I guess.
	I'm not going to pull it off the wall.
	It took a long time to decorate this fucker.
	Do you suffer from PTSD, do you think?
	I mean, yeah.
	I mean, technically, yeah.
	I mean, it's on my medical paperwork, my discharge stuff from my medical retirement.
	But I feel like I have overcome it quite a bit, just on my own accord, just do things I've learned to do, like not taking all this fucking prescription medication that the government gives you.
	What a lot of people don't know, though, is a lot of that shit's not even FDA approved.
	I mean, we're essentially, since we're In the Army and we work for the government, we have to do whatever they tell us.
	They can give us unapproved medication and essentially use this as test, you know, rats, lab rats.
	So we get adverse reactions.
	I remember they gave me malaria pills when I was in Iraq.
	I blacked out and woke up on the other side of the base.
	I was hallucinating and not knowing what was going on, throwing up, stopped eating.
	So after that, I just stopped taking it and lied and said that I was taking it all the time.
	I could have gotten malaria and died, but I felt more safe off of it.
	I'd rather get malaria than go through what I went through when I took those fucking pills.
	That's amazing.
	That's something I've never heard before.
	You don't hear any reporting on that.
	Military guinea pigs.
	Well they get Adderall too and all kinds of different stuff, but I would think a big part of recovering from fighting overseas is just the adrenaline rush.
	Don't you sort of get addicted to the excitement?
	Well, yeah, that's why I got lucky that, you know, when I got out, I was given an opportunity to work at InfoWars, and Alex had me as his on-the-ground guy.
	So, you know, my first, essentially my first assignment was the Ferguson Riots.
	So, for me, I felt smitten as a kitten, man.
	I fit right in there.
	I was deep in the cut like a Band-Aid.
	I was having a great time, running around, thugs were shooting, the cops were blowing shit up, there's flares going off, and beam backgrounds flying, and I'm getting punched and hit, and tear gas in my face.
	Like, I felt like it was Christmas morning, and I was extremely happy.
	It was like when you fly hard, you kind of get like a war boner.
	Yeah, yeah, I've heard you use that term before.
	War boner.
	So we got you flying up to New York this weekend to talk to Roland Martin.
	Lefty, MSNBC type of dude.
	I'm not sure what we should talk about.
	You're a 9-11 truther?
	I wouldn't call myself a truther, just because that can go so many ways.
	I don't like being put into, that's why I don't call myself a Republican or a Conservative, Republicans are spineless, conservatives are too obsessed with religion, and all that shit gets in the way.
	I don't want to be part of a group, a truther group, because a lot of those people, that gets spun into like alien beams and all this weird shit.
	Right.
	Like, I'm just a guy that thinks there's more to what happened than, you know, what happened.
	You know, I think that certain elements of the government had, you know, knowledge of what was going on and they kind of allowed it to happen because they like wars and with wars we can use these companies that we own like KBR and things like that to contract out to make money.
	It's all part of the military industrial complex.
	So, you know, do I think it's like they actually sat there and planned it?
	But do I think they knew about shit and they were kind of like, you know what?
	I think I'll look over here real quick, you know, and allowed things to happen.
	Yeah.
	Well, I'm sort of getting more open-minded to it, but maybe because I'm starting to meet more people who are not crazy that believe that, but one of my problems with it is it doesn't identify Islam as a problem, and it puts the culpability onto G.W.
	Bush and to, you know, Saudi Arabia and stuff, and I want to make sure that Islam remains culpable on that day.
	Yeah, I mean, think about that.
	I mean, these are bad people who wanted to do this.
	And they were like, yeah, these guys are the great boogeymen.
	I mean, of course, everyone's already scared of a lot of these people.
	They've already carried out attacks all over the world.
	Fuck it.
	Let's let him be the bad guy and we'll kind of help it happen.
	It'll push it along.
	It's a lot easier for those guys to be the bad guy than it is for another group, so to say.
	So it's, I don't know.
	It just depends on how you look at it.
	But you know, an interesting fact that not many people know this, and I can't remember if I fucking talked about it yesterday or not, but my first wife, her dad was the guy, he was a special forces soldier, all this shit, Vietnam, and he's a pilot as well.
	When he got out, he actually runs the airport in Florida that trained Muhammad Ata and all those guys how to actually fly those planes.
	I actually have seen The logs and the books that he still has, he still owns, he will not give up, with Mohammed Ades signature and things like that, and then complaints, voice messages that he had from him being, hey, why is it taking so long for me to get my license?
	Shit like that.
	And he, my first wife's father, was extremely suicidal after 9-11.
	He blamed himself for it, he still does to this day.
	He has massive PTSD on top of what happened in Vietnam, plus this sits on his soul every day.
	The guy's a fucking wreck, man.
	It's insane.
	You know, I sit there and talk to her sometimes.
	She called me up the other day and said that he was having an episode and I was just explaining all this shit because they came across the book with all the stuff and it made him think of everything again.
	So, yeah.
	The shit's real.
	Yeah.
	Well, that's one thing that sort of crossed my mind is if we were more dubious of radical Islam.
	Sorry, YouTube censors.
	I said Islam earlier.
	Let's make it radical Islam.
	If people are more dubious of radical Islam, more worried about it, then they'd say, why is this guy at a flight school?
	But people are so concerned with being politically correct, and I'm not blaming your ex-father-in-law, but in general, I wish they would go, this is weird.
	Like, remember, what's his name?
	Juan Williams said, I'm kind of uncomfortable with seeing Muslims praying at the gate when I get on a plane, and the NPR fired him right away.
	You may not think that.
	I mean, we should be able to steer, what is it, typecast or whatever.
	We should be able to, because certain groups of people do certain things, you know?
	And when a certain group, like, let's say this.
	Let's say that someone I know, a female, has been raped twice and both by Hispanic men.
	So maybe when she sees Hispanic men, she tends to tense up a bit and grab her purse and kind of get really fucking scared because something traumatic's happened to her from that specific group of people.
	You know, that's not a racist reaction, that is You're allowed to notice patterns.
	of person came after her twice, and she's been a victim of that.
	So, you know, when 9/11 happens and you have a group of fucking Muslims that fly planes into it, I'm sorry, it's a natural reaction if you're on the plane and you see someone like that, they go, "Oh, fuck, I don't wanna be on this plane right now." - You're allowed to notice patterns.
	You shouldn't be fired for noticing a pattern. - Why the fuck does law enforcement use them? - Okay, so, this weekend, we'll probably put it up Monday or Tuesday, maybe Tuesday actually, We've got you and Roland Martin, not really having a debate, just having a discussion, seeing what you guys have in common, what you don't have in common.
	That'll be a free speech show.
	And then tomorrow we're going to air the first episode of Biggs, and subsequently every Sunday till the end of time.
	Right on Joe.
	My heart stops.
	I like you more than a friend.
	Until I pull the pin and, you know, eat this.
	What a last episode that's gonna be, though.
	That's gonna be great for ratings.
	Oh yeah.
	I like you more than a friend, and I'll see you this weekend.
	Alrighty.
	Cheers, buddy.
	Sweet.
	That was Joe Biggs.
	Big guy.
	Big guy, frankly.
	Great guy.
	Tough guy.
	Been through a lot.
	He talks about when his Humvee exploded, he had a pen, I think it was in his hand or something, or it was sitting on a little thing where they take notes.
	And he said the Humvee was rotating, and in slow motion he could see his pen going...
	It makes sense, right?
	Your adrenaline's pumping, so your synapses are firing, so you're taking in so much information that it feels like slow motion.
	Slow motion for me.
	I knew a guy was in a car accident.
	Not that this remotely compares to fighting in Afghanistan, but he was a drunk.
	And he, someone blew a red, he was drinking.
	Someone blew a red light, hit the back of him.
	He went spinning and he saw his, he had a beer in his hand as he was driving.
	He saw his beer go, and the fluids were coming out, crawling all over like a spider web, crawling around the car as his beer that he wasn't holding anymore.
	He was just looking at, then he got out of the cab, sorry, he got out of his car, sat on the curb.
	He's one of these dummies who has a car in New York, where you just spend like $3,000 a year on parking tickets.
	Inevitably you get screwed.
	And he sat down on the curb and a cop comes up and he goes, what have you done?
	He's like, I'm fine.
	I have not.
	And then some lady, like with curlers in her hair and a bathrobe runs out and she goes, stop, stop, I saw what happened.
	That guy blew a red light.
	And then he did a hit and run.
	And the cop goes, he could tell my buddy was drunk, and he goes, this is your lucky day, my man.
	And he was laughing.
	He's like, holy shit, are you lucky?
	The cop?
	Yeah.
	That's great.
	And he just let him go.
	Should we do the five levels of Antifa now?
	We sure should.
	We shall, should.
	And then we'll come back.
	We'll be taking calls in 15 minutes.
	I don't think we're going to get to the mailbag today, but there's a lot of stuff I want to get to.
	We've got to talk about the Kim Kardashian of Mexico.
	We also have to record this.
	Wow, that's loud.
	And disgusting.
	And you know we didn't add that in post.
	You know we didn't add that in post.
	Oh, you know it!
	You know that was legit toot!
	Welcome back to the show, Legit Toot, where all the farts are real and all the news is fake.
	Yeah, let's, let's... I've been working on this for a while.
	It's my new baby.
	Actually, just today.
	But I think it's important to break down the five levels of antifa.
	Shall we do this?
	Yes.
	All right, let's do it.
	Let's do the five types of antifa.
	Starting at number five.
	The orphans.
	Now, Alex Jones always talks about Tifa being a bunch of meth-head, loser, homeless kids, and he's right.
	They are.
	But out of the five, this type, the sad losers, the junkies and the family-less vagrants, the nomads, they're not that big of a percentage, depending on the town.
	They're big in Berkeley and Oakland and Portland, but you don't really see them in New York City.
	So the orphans are, Sad sacks, crusty punks, junkies.
	You see them panning for change, trying to get enough money to buy a beer, pretending they need it for food.
	You see them on heroin, picking their toes.
	And the next category, the number three category, which we'll get to in a sec, the sort of bosses, they prey on these weak-minded people.
	And they pull them in and they say, hey, we got you a house funded by, you know, Hope Not Hate or some sort of Soros-funded globalist thing.
	We got you this house.
	And then they say it's a house.
	And then when they go to a rally, they feel beholden to their hosts to pay back the benevolence they've received.
	Or even just, I never felt like I was part of a family.
	My parents didn't love me.
	Now I feel like part of a family.
	I love you guys.
	Like the guy who blew up the ICE facility, or tried to, William Van Sporen, whatever his name was.
	He wasn't an orphan, but, you know, when it comes to love, he was like an orphan, and then he didn't have a family.
	And they were his family.
	So, you feel beholden to your family.
	Just like a cult, you feel beholden to L. Ron Hubbard.
	So these sad sacks...
	They, uh, the upper echelons of Antifa prey on these poor losers.
	And again, when you see a crowd of Antifa, the orphans are only about 10%, depending on the city.
	In New York, there may be 1%.
	In Berkeley and Oakland, there may be 20, 25%.
	And what happens with these poor bastards is they get in over their head.
	Like my favorite example is this kid, Nathan Hose.
	And he was a junkie living on the streets with his dog and his parents didn't have good contact with them.
	And so Antifa took him in and he said, yeah, I'll do whatever you want.
	And they said, all right, disrupt J20.
	Let's riot in New Orleans.
	And so he said, okay, I'm rioting.
	I'm rioting guys.
	I'm rioting.
	And then he gets felony charges and he's facing prison time.
	That's what happens in real life.
	So he kills himself.
	And I always include this, they like to talk about Heather Heyer and all the people that the alleged fascists have killed, but Antifa's death count is alarmingly high, and they tend to be these sad orphans.
	Of course, you also have Pim Fortin and the massacre in Ohio, that was an Antifa shooting, and you get that dummy at that school who had a gun on him, he said, and smashed the patriarchy, the patriarchy must die, and then he ended up shooting at a cop and getting killed.
	So a lot of Antifa get killed by their own brainwashing.
	No one kills more Muslims than Muslims.
	No one kills more Antifa than Antifa.
	But the orphans are a relevant group.
	Alex Jones, they're not all of Antifa.
	That's only number five.
	Number four!
	Are the Professor's Kids.
	Now, these are the ones that I seem to come across the most.
	They're the ones who pepper sprayed me and call me a fascist and doxxed me and attacked my family.
	These are the ones that Proud Boys end up fighting in New York.
	And fighting Professor's Kids is almost like a zombie movie.
	Like, you just punch them and their arm comes off.
	They never return a punch.
	In fact, at my talk, there was two Proud Boys who were arrested and nine Antifa because they just kept Getting caught in the fray as Proud Boys would just beat them up and vanish into the night.
	They're not good at fighting.
	Now, what I wanted to mention, too, is you have some intersectionality going on here.
	Sometimes people in Category 2 take on elements of Category, sorry, Category 4, take on elements of Category 5.
	For example, Finbar Slonim was this rich kid, there's pictures of him here, who was arrested, go back to the Google image search, So, he's a rich kid.
	You see him, like, here with his dad, uh, something else Slonim.
	And, uh, what's that guy's name?
	The dad?
	I forget his name.
	He killed himself.
	And I don't know why he killed himself.
	Maybe he's gay, maybe he found out his son was gay, or maybe he was just broke and he had to continue this illusion of being a wealthy Upper West Side New Yorker.
	Anyway, Finbar has money, but he's also mentally weak and looking for a family.
	He doesn't have a father, so he goes to Portland, and they take him in, just like an orphan, and he becomes Solange Slonim, a woman.
	And he gets arrested, of course, fighting Proud Boys, but because he's Antifa, the magical Antifa lawyers show up.
	We'll get to them in a second.
	They're a Category 2.
	So, he's an interesting combination of four and five in that he's a rich kid, but he's also an orphan.
	Another good example of the rich kid, professor's kids, is David Campbell.
	David Campbell was at the Night for Freedom that Vic Berger doxxed and got an old Jewish man beaten to it within an inch of his life.
	This kid, David Campbell, is a rich kid, but he's going to jail now where he'll get buttfucked because he believed in Antifa rhetoric.
	So, in both of these cases, for the most part, they tend to be victims.
	In a sense.
	But my favorite example of category four, the professor's kids, is these guys.
	Chad and Josh Coleman.
	Now, Chad and Josh Coleman were in the news recently.
	I think I had the link there.
	Yeah.
	New York Post.
	What they did is that the news reported that a bunch of Nazis beat up these poor innocent Antifa kids for just having an Antifa sticker on their phone.
	Uh, that's kind of true.
	What really happened was these academics, and again, category four, they're begging for some sort of life experience to give them some culture because they recognize that they're loser rich kids who have never experienced any grit in their lives.
	So they pick fights with people in order to feel like, I fought the Nazis!
	I'm a civil rights crusader!
	So they had their phones out with the Antifa sticker on them and they were filming this crew, 211 crew, these old skinheads in Manhattan.
	Multiracial.
	You can't be a Nazi skinhead in Manhattan.
	It's not possible.
	There's too much diversity.
	Anyway, they're filming these blue-collar dudes at a punk night in order to dox them.
	And these old punk guys who work in construction and stuff, they're my age, they see these phones in their face, they see it's Antifa, they see they're being doxed, so they beat up the Coleman brothers.
	The media And a lot of New York Post writers tend to be Columbia journalism students.
	They know these guys.
	And they make it, they were beat up by Nazis just for having a sticker.
	No, they picked a fight with blue collar dudes and got their asses kicked.
	So they are the quintessential example of number four, the professor's kids.
	Whenever you find these Antifa, especially in New York City, you find out that they're doing their PhDs and they're skinny, upper middle class, Upper East Side, Upper West Side kids, desperate for some sort of culture in their lives, some sort of, I don't know, blood on their fists, which they end up just getting bloodied themselves.
	All right.
	Now one step up from these people are the shot callers.
	The night of my talk, there was this kid, Angel, I believe his name might be Johnny Young.
	And there he is beating up journalist Paul Miller and getting away with it, by the way.
	This, this guy, do you have the picture of him in the hat where he's on the phone?
	Oh, that's Rita Ortiz.
	There he as Johnny Young.
	There should be one more.
	No?
	Yeah, that one.
	So there he is literally calling shots.
	And what these shot callers do is they are given authority by Category 2.
	Sorry, yeah, Category 2.
	And they say, okay, there's a journalist over there.
	Amass the mob and have them attack him.
	He's like, No problem.
	Okay, guys, we got a journalist here.
	He looks like he's pro-Trump.
	I want you to beat the shit out of him.
	Okay, let's do it.
	So they are sort of like the lieutenants, and they control Category 4 and Category 5.
	Category 4 and Category 5, the orphans and the professor's kids, though they come from totally different worlds, and the orphans were molested and are drug addicts, and the professor's kids have never been in a fistfight in their lives, they both look exactly the same to the outside world.
	And this mob of miscreants won The orphans looking for trouble in order to make their hosts happy.
	Two, the professor's kids looking for trouble in order to give themselves some sort of culture, some sort of grit, some sort of background, some sort of experience.
	Both of those groups are out running around looking for a fight.
	The shot callers are the ones who say, okay, let's do it.
	And they bequeath who has to die and send them out.
	Rita Ortiz, I think you showed that earlier, she runs like this all cops are bastards type thing.
	Ortiz Kim, sorry.
	Ortiz Kim.
	Go to the first picture of her.
	There she is.
	So her mother died.
	I'm guessing it looks like a heroin overdose, some sort of overdose.
	So again, with the intersectionality to choose the other side's term, she's an orphan in a sense.
	But she's tenacious enough and ambitious enough to not be category five and to work her way all the way up to category three, the shot caller.
	And she was actually at my talk.
	There's a picture of her in the audience.
	No, you see it?
	It's like a riot photo.
	Yeah, there she is.
	That's her there.
	Again, they all look pretty similar, but you'll notice the shot callers tend to keep their hands fairly clean.
	Now, you have these shot callers, number three, you have the professor's kids, you have the orphans out there getting into serious trouble, getting arrested, going to court.
	Who helps them?
	That brings us to category two, The lesbian lawyers.
	Now, these, these, this group tends to have a couple of important roles.
	They're sort of the administrators of the movement.
	And if you ever go to a rally, you'll notice they all have perfect signs.
	If you go to a bonafide grassroots rally, like there was some Puerto Rican governor that the New Yoricans didn't like, and they protested at Grand Central against this guy.
	You look at their signs, they're all homemade, they're all different, lots of Puerto Rican flags.
	You go to one of these Antifa type of things, And they all have perfect signs, beautifully designed, and those are funded by category one, the globalists, we'll get to in a second, but you'll see these lawyers with short, my haircut, hanging them out, they appear to be lesbians, and those are, that's category two.
	They fund it, they dole out the money to the shot callers.
	Oh, speaking of money, by the way, The money stops around number two.
	Shot callers might get a small stipend.
	Like, for example, at my talk, they were throwing bottles of piss at us.
	Glass bottles.
	And these glass bottles were P. Diddy's vodka, Ciroc.
	Where'd they get the money for that?
	Category two.
	The lesbian lawyers will dole out like 200 bucks and say, go buy some booze, some glass bottles that look like they could make great projectiles.
	Then pour out the booze, piss in it, and throw it at Gavin.
	So they help coordinate making the signs.
	It's funny that they're women because they're doing kind of womanly stuff like organizing, administrating, getting the kids ready for school, backing their Antifa lunchbox.
	But this category also represents them in court.
	Now, I'm not saying that Moira Meltzer-Cohen is a lesbian.
	I don't think she is.
	That's probably why she has a hyphenated name.
	But she personifies this category I'm talking about.
	Turn that up.
	Blah, blah, blah.
	We'll be getting her out and we'll be defending Antifa.
	Caleb Perkins was one of the Antifa who attacked that guy I showed you earlier, Paul Miller.
	It was Moira Cohen who shows up when Caleb Perkins beat up a cop.
	And she magically appears and gets him out of jail.
	No press, no reputations ruined, and no cost to Antifa.
	Another great example of the lesbian lawyer category, and I don't think she's a lesbian either, just a category, is Yvette Falarka.
	Now, Yvette Falarka is the quintessential female organizer, one above, she is the number two thing.
	And what she does is she'll take in category five, these orphans in Berkeley, and here, here's a house.
	You can stay here.
	Here's some more gruel, sir.
	And when you have these losers, these Antifa number five, the orphans category, when they get into trouble, or sorry, when there's an opportunity for them to fight, it'll be Yvette who says, all right, you guys, now you owe me.
	Come on in.
	You know, she doesn't have to say it literally.
	She can just be like, we're at a rally.
	You just had some nice gruel.
	Are you coming?
	Yes, ma'am.
	So they go to please her.
	And category two is a very important category because they really are the ones.
	doling out the money, the responsibilities.
	They sometimes either find the lawyers or they are the lawyers.
	They're the ones having the signs made.
	Without them, there's nothing.
	If you get rid of Category 2, you're good.
	Now, that brings us to the final category, category one, the globalists, the money men.
	Obviously, if you cut the head off this snake, then you wouldn't have anything else, but I kind of feel like number two is much more important than number one.
	There'll always be money on both sides funding these things, but without someone to make the signs and to get the lawyers, you're not going to have the shot callers, the professor's kids, and the orphans.
	They have no direction.
	So the, and I have a feeling too that the lesbian lawyers would just figure out a way to do this even without money.
	It's not that expensive.
	Oh there's another group by the, well I'll get to the other groups at the end.
	So yeah the globalists, I'm not going to say George Soros because that's too easy, but a perfect example of this Again, just like Moira Meltzer-Cohen personifies Category 2, Eric Kessler personifies Category 1.
	Now, I don't know if this is photoshopped or what's going on here, or he's dressed as a hipster for Halloween.
	He normally doesn't look like this.
	But Eric Kessler is the head of a fund called Arabella.
	You've got to look into Arabella.
	It's amazing.
	It's a half a billion dollar fund that was behind Kavanaugh.
	It's behind thwarting any Supreme Court judge that Trump appoints.
	They're behind pushing priests to focus on open borders and the environment more than Christianity.
	Like they, their job is to sabotage the Western world under the guise of being a progressive group.
	Do you want to click on his Twitter there?
	This is what Eric Kessler usually looks like.
	When you find trouble, you will find Arabella.
	And it's people like this that fund Group 2, who then administrates Group 3, who then calls the shots and commands the troops, which are Group 4 and Group 5.
	They're all the same group.
	And Group 4 and Group 5, Antifa as a whole is the paramilitary wing of the DNC.
	That's why they don't get in trouble.
	Because politicians like Cuomo and de Blasio and Nancy Pelosi and Tim Kaine and who's that old black lady again who says fight it?
	Maxine Waters.
	They all need DNC.
	That's their shock troops.
	That's their storm troopers.
	So they'll always be fine.
	They'll always have free representation in court.
	Unfortunately our side is the side of freedom and when we get in trouble we have to defend ourselves.
	We don't have the grand puppeteer.
	Now I haven't summed up everyone who's at a rally.
	We have people who are paid to be there.
	You'll notice them, they don't look like they belong.
	They'll be like a black girl with an orange sweater on just holding a sign she hasn't even read.
	Or some dude in a turtleneck who is clearly some sort of Turkish immigrant and he's also holding a sign looking around wondering where he is.
	Those people get a hundred bucks.
	You see ads for them on Craigslist.
	They are paid for and handled by Group 2, lesbian lawyers, but they're not Antifa.
	So I'm not including them in this.
	There's also the geriatrics you see at these rallies.
	The white-haired old ladies and men with the white beards.
	And they are sort of fluff.
	They're filler.
	They're boomer holdouts.
	Oh, this is a great example.
	Look at these signs.
	You notice they're not all beautiful?
	There's a white-haired old filler.
	The old fillers are geriatric boomers who missed the 60s and are just there.
	They protest whatever you want.
	And they don't have to get paid.
	And the lesbian lawyers dig them up on Facebook and throw them in.
	They fill up the cracks.
	There's also like rich housewives.
	They are happy to grab the Antifa torch and torment me in my own neighborhood and fuck with my kid's social life.
	The rich housewives are just as useful to the movement as everything else.
	But I'm focusing this video on Antifa.
	And look at this.
	Let's listen to this dumb chick talk about how white supremacy is everything.
	I would like for our president to stop instilling racism in our country.
	I think that that is what has affected every single community, not just the immigrant community, but also the black community.
	Every single community is affected by racism.
	It's everywhere.
	It's a be-all and end-all solution, calling everyone racist.
	But you'll notice her sign is organic.
	So that's just a dumb chick who's been brainwashed by all this rhetoric, but at least she's real.
	At least her sign is real.
	This is fake.
	All of these signs looking the same, that's all fake.
	That's Category 2 made those after they got a check from Category 1.
	And remember folks, the checks don't leave Category 1 and Category 2.
	All the money stays there.
	3, 4, and 5 are fucked.
	They're just useful idiots here to ruin America.
	Aren't you supposed to play the music?
	What were you doing there?
	Just watching the show?
	Yeah, I didn't think it ended that quick.
	You were here- you recorded it!
	Right, I forgot... that it ended that quick.
	I had this music ready- Unbelievable.
	The reason I don't fire him is so you guys can see what's happening to, I guess, millennials?
	I don't know what you are.
	Gen Z?
	He's 30.
	What's 30 year olds?
	I think millennial.
	Besides completely useless and everything.
	Here we go.
	Just in time.
	Just in time.
	Man, we got a lot of stuff to do and we're supposed to be taking calls.
	Maybe we can just cram our calls into the last half hour.
	I should make something clear.
	By the way, I sent you a better picture of the Coleman brothers.
	What are you doing now?
	- What are you doing? - I gotta plug in the other camera.
	- The Coleman brothers, I am 90% sure that those are the guys, and I'm basing that on my sources.
	I have good sources who say that those are the two with the Antifa sticker who got beat up.
	What's conclusive evidence?
	I don't know.
	You have to trust your sources and say this is As good as I could verify that it was Chad and Josh Coleman.
	You'll notice when I doxed them on Twitter, I didn't dox their home address of course, but when I exposed them on Twitter after they had ruined lives of these working class guys and got them fired, they didn't say, that's not us.
	I was just criticized for outing the victims of neo-Nazis.
	No one ever said it wasn't them.
	So, that's even more evidence that I got the right guys.
	What's conclusive evidence?
	I don't know.
	So there's still a chance that the Coleman brothers were not the two twins.
	And the reason I say that there's a chance is so I don't get sued.
	Sort of like when condoms say they're 99%.
	That's so they can say that it was the 1% if you get pregnant.
	We should probably jump through the news quickly.
	Particularly, yeah, let's go through world news.
	Trudeau in blackface, I think, is a story we can't wait till Monday for.
	I hate Justin Trudeau.
	I think he's a useless retard.
	Just an airhead.
	I think the best description I've heard of Justin Trudeau, I wasn't a fan of his dad either, was the Zoolander PM.
	He's Zoolander.
	He's not evil.
	Some people are evil.
	Yvette Falarka is evil.
	I think Eric Hessler is evil.
	They want to sabotage the West.
	The globalists want to destroy everything and then rebuild it in their own image.
	They think they're God and they think we're the Tower of Babel and we must be destroyed.
	But Justin Trudeau isn't smart enough to be evil.
	Anyway, he's being pilloried for appearing in various faces, both black and brown, and I'm enjoying it.
	Whatever.
	You invented this clown world, so when clowns get hoisted on their own retard, uh, I find it amusing.
	But, I'll get to how I truly feel about Blackface in a second.
	But let's go to some of the pictures here, because it's happened several times.
	He loves dressing up, like all silly girls.
	Think of him as a silly girl.
	And by the way, it was silly girls who voted for him because he's a gorgeous hunk.
	That's why he exists.
	Because he's a hottie.
	What are you doing, dude?
	What are you skimming all over the place for?
	There he is at an Arabian Nights party.
	Look, his hands are black.
	I'm impressed with the makeup, because you see him touching a lot of people and women and stuff, and it doesn't come off.
	I bet that's a bitch to get off.
	That's how devoted he is to his costumes.
	As you run all over the place trying to find links, do you want to click on that and don't show as a commercial?
	Oh, Jesus.
	Can you show us the... Use the Daily Mail.
	There we go.
	So that doesn't look like it's the Arabian Nights one.
	Go up a bit.
	This has happened again and again.
	There he is as some sort of funky dude.
	That's funky.
	Now this is Montreal and he's a Quebecer by trade and Quebec doesn't have racism.
	I'm from Quebec, and the only time we would see black people is when they were rich Haitians who were wealthy enough to leave Haiti, so aristocrats.
	So if you went to a party in Montreal and there was black people there, you'd go, oh great, a coke and shipper.
	This is gonna be a bunch of rich kids in scarves and blazers and no fun.
	That's the black experience in Quebec.
	They're nerds.
	So I'm loving seeing Justin get totally fucked by this stupid rule, but if you want my honest opinion, blackface, There it is.
	Now that's in Vancouver.
	But look how hot that chick is.
	That is my type in a nutshell.
	What would you say she is, the brunette there?
	Mmm, seven point something.
	I'm not a fan of her cheeks.
	You're not a fan of her cheeks?
	No.
	How can you not like those little cheeks?
	Something about him.
	I don't know.
	I love those dark eyes.
	It's kind of got a... I think I'm into Middle Eastern women.
	I think I love Iranians.
	Yeah, the eyebrows are doing it for you, too.
	I love the eyebrows.
	Yeah.
	I just love her vibe.
	Maybe you sense that they're intelligent, too.
	They call themselves Persians now because they don't want to be associated with the shithole that radical Islam created.
	He said his statement was, I'm really pissed off at myself.
	I'm not joking.
	That's literally what he said.
	But I wrote an article, I researched blackface because I think I have a pretty good perspective on it as an outsider.
	There he is.
	I mean, that's a kind of worse, that Indian one.
	Go back to the Indian one.
	I find that kind of more patronizing.
	You know what I mean?
	This is a crazy view, but sometimes blackface is an homage.
	To the person you're dressing up as.
	That doesn't appear to be an homage.
	That seems kind of degrading.
	I don't know.
	Like, hey, I put on one of your silly hats.
	Now I'm Indian.
	Now I have your religion.
	Like, do Jews want you to wear a yarmulke and go to temple and say, hi, I'm a Jew today?
	They go, no, it doesn't work like that.
	Or Muslims?
	Should you go to Mecca and just be like, hi, I'm walking around the big black cube.
	I'm a Muslim today.
	Look, I'm touching it.
	Hello.
	Yes, some of blackface is brutally insulting and an insulting stereotype of American blacks.
	I would say if you go out throughout all of history throughout all of the world about 5 to 10% of blackface is meant to mock people of color.
	But in many cases go back to my article, please.
	It's an homage.
	And in Puritan early America, the nerds, the white nerds who founded this country, they were kind of fascinated by blacks.
	They had music and culture and they had, there was sort of infidelity and there was an argument and a fight and they were just colorful.
	So they would get on stage and be like, I'm a black person, I'm exciting.
	And it became a way to say, you're cool, believe it or not.
	That's totally left out.
	They go, Jim Crow laws were named after minstrel shows.
	Yeah, a percentage of them were insulting.
	But a lot of them, like look at Black Pete over in Europe.
	He's Santa's helper.
	Everyone dresses up in blackface to recognize Black Pete.
	When I was a kid in the 70s in Britain, we would watch a show called the Black and White Minstrel Show.
	And you could call it ignorant, you could call it naive, but it was definitely not a lampoon of black people.
	These guys were not stupid.
	They didn't fall down stairs and stuff.
	They threw beach balls to hot chicks and they rode boats.
	Can we hear this song?
	"Romances and moonlight romances where cupid can set you right on your ear, June, July and August." So you know what's really going on here with Blackface Outrage?
	It's the fundamentals of political correctness, which is I know more than you.
	I'm more educated than you.
	It's not African-American anymore.
	It's person of color.
	What you're saying is you just, you're dumb.
	You're watching some silly show.
	I'm actually cultured and I know how and why that show is offensive.
	You don't.
	You're a stupid old British lady.
	But they managed to ignore the fact that blackface was a million different things in a million different places all over the world.
	Yes, in America, in, say, the late 1800s, early 1900s, a percentage of it was used to mock black people.
	Yes.
	We also had people on stage, men on stage with wigs and lipstick on going, Hello, I'm a lady!
	Woo-hoo-hoo!
	I love men!
	Ha-ha-ha!
	Drag queens!
	Drag queens are female blackface.
	You're dressing up as a... Hi, I'm a hot mess!
	I'm a lady and I'll open my legs for anybody!
	Ha-ha!
	That's the same thing, is it not?
	And it's funny too that we're pretending to be all incredulous about this thing that was ubiquitous maybe 20 years ago.
	And you've all seen Jimmy Kimmel and Jimmy Fallon in blackface.
	Have you seen Joni Mitchell?
	She wore blackface on a regular basis and she had a character.
	What was his name again?
	Art Laveau or something like that?
	No, it was like Rip.
	The name was kind of offensive.
	Where is it?
	Did I send it to you in a separate email?
	No.
	I have Trudeau and Blackface and then I don't have anything else in my notes.
	In my notes.
	Her name was like Rip something.
	Why isn't this in my notes?
	Did I show you that?
	Did you just dig that up on your own?
	Yeah, I'm looking for it.
	You're watching a hole in the plot, folks.
	So anyway, that was Joni Mitchell.
	His name was like Zap Black or something like that.
	That was the name of this character.
	When you look it up, it'll say, she dressed like that one Halloween because she didn't want to be recognized.
	No, she regularly was this character.
	Look, she's on an album cover as that character.
	That's her on her own album cover.
	It's Art Nouveau.
	Dressed as that guy Zap.
	Zapcoon or something.
	Art Nouveau, it says.
	What are you saying?
	Joni's alter ego who christened Art Nouveau.
	You are so stupid, you don't know the term Art Nouveau, do you?
	You think that's the name of the guy?
	Yeah.
	How can you not have heard of Art Nouveau?
	It's a new art, does it mean?
	Joni's alter ego who she christened... I don't understand what you do all day.
	How come you've never heard of anything?
	Do you know what Art Brut is?
	Do you know what the Renaissance Movement is?
	Do you know what the Romantic Era was?
	Jesus, Bronx schools, look what you've done!
	So wait, what does this sentence mean here?
	That she christened it as Art Nouveau?
	Yes!
	Because I think you told me, I heard it from you, that his name was Art Nouveau.
	No, I would never say that.
	His name is like Zap something.
	Anyway, the more you look into this, the more you see how common it was.
	I remember years ago seeing some kid who got in big trouble on MLK Day.
	He memorized Martin Luther King's speech and he came to school.
	This kid was like nine and he came to school in brown face and he did MLK's speech and got in huge shit for it.
	Can you leave it alone, please?
	It was so irritating seeing Fred Armisen on SNL do Obama with no skin makeup on.
	He looked like Obama with food poisoning, who was incredibly pale.
	Or, I guess I didn't send you Billy Crystal?
	Yeah, how did you get that?
	I got it from the moron blackface.
	Oh yeah, I sent you a separate email.
	Yes.
	So the moron blackface should have her name.
	Go look it up, sorry, it's gonna drive me nuts.
	This isn't good TV.
	Oh, Zip Coon.
	Zip Coon?
	Yeah, that's pretty bad.
	Z-I-P?
	Yeah.
	Zip Coon.
	Okay.
	Now, you got me.
	That is something that is definitely offensive.
	Coon has always been derogatory.
	That's racist.
	By the way, in a coon's age, it has nothing to do with racial epithets.
	It was from hillbillies who thought that when they kept seeing a raccoon, it was the same raccoon.
	So they thought, these things live to like 150 years old.
	So when they say, I haven't seen you in a coon's age, they meant one of those old rodents that lives to 100.
	But yeah, let's just have a look at a different time when everyone didn't pretend to be offended by everything.
	And if you're portraying a black character, which this isn't even an insulting betrayal.
	It's more of an homage to Sammy Davis.
	You could use makeup on your fucking face.
	A lot is made of the jewelry that you wear.
	And what I notice is that you never make comment about it.
	I mean, it's just part of you.
	It's not like you're bragging or, you know, it's not an ostentatious thing.
	They're fun.
	They're fun.
	And they are part of me because I can't get the damn things off, you know, but I love them.
	You know, it's fun.
	It's a tinkle time.
	Doesn't that sound exactly like Billy Crystal?
	It sounds like... Sammy to me.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	This sounds like a guy doing... This sounds like Billy Crystal doing a very subtle Sammy Davis Jr.
	This sounds like Billy Crystal after having his dentures removed.
	Or coming back from the dentist.
	There is a lot of Crystal in there.
	A lot of crystal.
	- Very good.
	Crackers, pickles, monkeys.
	- Things found in a barrel. - Very good.
	Schmechlich, albechen, tiktachen, schmelden. - Things you hock up in the morning.
	- Um, Dan Haggerty, Ernest Borgnine.
	- This is when Rob Reiner was funny too, before he became an annoying pain in the ass.
	Everything was better before politics had to be infused into everything.
	Anyway, that's enough of that.
	So that's Billy Crystal doing Sammy Davis Jr.
	Were you offended by that?
	Did that make you mad?
	No.
	But!
	You guys invented Clown World, so if Justin Trudeau is gonna step in it after you lay shit everywhere, I'm not gonna go clean his boots.
	Sorry, Justin.
	Um...
	We should be taking calls soon.
	We're late on calls.
	But I want to look at this Kim Kardashian chick who was just shot in bed.
	And I want to hear your rating, Ryan.
	Of her?
	She's 35, which is basically the perfect age for women.
	That's when they start getting bonafide horny.
	Like, women want to have sex a lot in their 20s, but it's kind of like, because that's what you do.
	But they start getting good at it, if you will.
	Oh, you've got to find Spooky.
	They start getting good at it, if you will, which is a Gary Coleman reference.
	Yeah, let's put that on the video soundboard.
	Spooky and getting good at it, if you will.
	Yeah, those are good.
	Because we both say that 24 hours a day.
	You never know when it's coming.
	You have no idea how often in the studio we say, and getting good at it, if you will.
	We also constantly quote the dude from Bone Thugs-N-Harmony who was on crack on an interview, and he goes, as well, as well, as well.
	God.
	You know what I'm saying, my brother, a lot of things.
	And I was like, okay.
	And then when he got interviewed about that, he goes, I was not on crack during the interview, I was just really feeling Jesus Christ.
	Okay.
	Okay, well, Jesus Christ then feels exactly like crack.
	So yeah, she was El Chapo's right-hand lady.
	And god, she wears so much makeup, it's hard to see what she looks like.
	You know what I mean?
	Yeah.
	That's terrifying.
	That could be a dude.
	Ladies, take it easy.
	Bit of eyeliner.
	I don't even really like lipstick.
	You know what I mean?
	I don't like lipstick.
	When you see lipstick, you never say, oh, she's got very red lips.
	You just go, oh, you have tons of paint on your lips.
	Yeah, lipstick is out.
	Eye makeup tricks you.
	Eye makeup looks normal.
	Like in that one, she's got no lipstick on and tons of eye makeup.
	Your brain doesn't see tons of paint on her eyes.
	In fact, when you- whoa!
	When you see a girl with no eye makeup, you go, whoa, what the hell happened to you?
	Those are probably fake tits, though.
	She looks like Suzy and the Banshees in that one.
	This one's way better.
	Less smoky eyes.
	Alright, so what are we gonna throw at her?
	The picture- that's her dead, by the way, in the- What?
	She's obviously bloated.
	Oh, right here.
	Yeah.
	Holy shit.
	A difficult situation.
	I guess El Chapo goes, I could kill every dude that she sleeps with, or I could just kill her.
	Yeah.
	This is the OJ Simpson way of dealing with your ex.
	See, she looks like a person there.
	That's cute.
	All right.
	Great bone structure.
	I can't, you know.
	Maybe real tits.
	Let's just give her the benefit of the tits.
	Just for fun.
	I don't know.
	Hispanic women, like Jewish ladies, tend to be gifted in the boob region.
	Yeah.
	It's Caucasians that seem to get a disproportionate number of fake tits.
	Do you think she has butt implants?
	Mexicans aren't really big on that.
	Is she actually, she's blood Mexican?
	I assume so.
	Yeah.
	I don't know.
	I don't think they have impressive asses actually.
	No, they're not known for that.
	Yeah, so it might be a fake butt.
	Because that's, like, picturesque.
	Yeah, but it's not crazy.
	It's not a Nicki Minaj one.
	No.
	But again, I want to get a doctor on the show.
	I do not understand fake butts.
	I'm not saying I don't understand the appeal.
	I don't get how they work.
	Fake tits, they just sit on your chest.
	You can go jogging, whatever.
	They don't really get messed around.
	I'm sure your husband squeezes them occasionally.
	A fake ass...
	You're sitting on a steel bench.
	Doesn't that, that must be murder on those, whatever those bags are.
	And you see like on 650 pound life, when they get up and they walk around, you see sitting has made their ass into a bizarre shelf that sticks out like a foot on either side.
	That's a God made ass and it can't take a beating.
	So a man made ass, I don't understand how the bags survive.
	Like say you had elbow bags, right?
	'Cause you were worried about your, I believe this skin is called your weenus.
	Say you had elbow bags, right?
	They would get shredded.
	Yeah.
	They'd move all over the place.
	You'd have to go back to the doctor and go, hey, my elbow bags are up here.
	My weenus protector.
	Calf implants?
	I'm not advocating for any implants.
	I don't like any plastic surgery at all.
	Even if your dog bites your face off.
	Just have a faceless face.
	But calf implants, I get it.
	You know, you run around, they move a little bit.
	They don't get, like my ass, I'm sitting on my ass all the time.
	How do the bags survive this?
	You know what I mean?
	I don't get it.
	It would flop around.
	How does it not?
	Unless you anchor it.
	Unless you're always sitting on some crazy orthopedic... I remember this dude, Ted, he got hit by a drunk driver and the car dragged him for a block down Wythe Avenue in Williamsburg.
	Tore his ass off.
	He lost 30% of his butt cheeks.
	That's a movie.
	Ass off.
	And he had to sit on this pillow.
	It was like a leather pillow with rubber little inflatable things on it.
	Little like this, but black rubber ones.
	The little balloons.
	Little thick rubber balloons.
	That's what he had to sit on if he wanted to sit.
	And it was a $1,500 pillow.
	I understand if you sit on a $1,500 pillow with your fake buttcheeks, maybe.
	But the wear and tear that a butt goes through?
	Oh, I have something on my notes here.
	I called Finbar Slonim's new female personality Solange, and you see in the video it says Slonim or something.
	Like all these nuts who become women, there's a million names he's taken on.
	So his name, birth name is Finbar Slonim, but he's used Solange and... Solum.
	Solum.
	To describe his new persona.
	I'm a lady now.
	But I'm kind of a butch, lady.
	That's so weird, when you become a woman but you're a tomboy.
	Yeah.
	Like, you see that in New York all the time.
	You just see like a dude with tits, long blue hair, and he's just like eating a burrito and he's got jeans on and Skechers.
	Why'd you bother?
	If I'm going to be a woman, I'm going to be like a, hello Doris Day with like a poodle skirt and my hair done like this and tons of makeup because I'm moving over.
	You know what I mean?
	Yeah.
	Like if you move to China, you're not going to like speak a little Chinese.
	You're like, yeah.
	All right.
	Um, but they're also, wait, we didn't rate her.
	Oh.
	I don't feel comfortable rating the dead.
	What?
	I just... I'm not disparaging her.
	I looked at all of her butt pics, but I'm not gonna put a number on it.
	You've already objectified her, dude.
	We talked about her butt and her tits.
	That's what she wanted to put out there in her life.
	She was like, here I am.
	We don't disparage the dead on this show, but we can rate them when they were alive.
	She's very close to an 8.
	She's very different from the Justin Trudeau chick, but I think she's the same in the scale.
	So it's amazing how 8.1s can be kind of slutty, no offense-looking Mexicans, and also wholesome Vancouver drama teachers.
	There's a wide range of 8.1s.
	She's not my type.
	Depending on... No?
	Not a Latina guy.
	Reminds you of your mother too much?
	No, it's just, uh, I've had... I just have certain things... You know how evil I am?
	If I was single, I would try to start dating your mother just to drive you insane.
	I don't think I'd care.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	How about if you came to my house and there was her little shoes just by the door?
	Fuck them.
	Her little... Her little sketchers just sitting there.
	I don't think she wears sketchers.
	I think she wears boots.
	Her little boots.
	You come over, there's your mom's little boots.
	Your loss.
	A little zipper down.
	A little side zip is open because she took them off.
	There's your mom's boots.
	I'm keeping her busy.
	One's sitting up, one's on the side.
	Ryan's mom's boots.
	Oh it is.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	As long as you're making her happy.
	Now if you're trying to be deceitful.
	Technically you're dating her for a prank.
	Yo, if you're trying to be deceitful, that's different.
	What are you?
	The head of Melanin Nation now?
	Are you in the nation of Islam?
	Well, if you are doing it under the guise of, but not limited to, deceits, then that's wrong.
	You mean?
	I wouldn't get mad if you had sex with my mother, but if you ever lie, I'll never speak to your ass again.
	If you're facetiously dicking her down, we got our issues.
	Alright, we're almost done with the news.
	We're running very late.
	I want to cover this Pepe thing because it's relevant and it won't be on Monday.
	Here's what happens.
	So the top brass of the DNC comes up with a narrative.
	America is white supremacist.
	Everyone's racist.
	Nazis lurk everywhere.
	If anyone disagrees with you, they're a racist.
	What about Trump?
	Trump supporters?
	Yes.
	He's a white nationalist.
	He's in the White House and all his supporters are racist.
	So like half the country?
	Yes.
	What about the black people that support him?
	And then they get fucked.
	So what they do is they go to the academics and they go, hey man, you spent about five years in university spending 60 grand a year learning total and utter horseshit and coming up with various logic pretzels and making up crazy words like intersectionality and hegemony you spent about five years in university spending 60 grand a year learning total and utter horseshit and coming up with various logic pretzels and making up And hegemony and all this other Marxist claptrap that no one uses in real life, including the word fascist.
	No one says fascist on the streets.
	Hey man, I'm gonna, uh, we're doing a contract now.
	We're doing all the plumbing for that building in, uh, on Long Island City.
	Oh yeah?
	I heard one of the subcontractors is a fascist.
	Never happened.
	That word doesn't exist outside of academia.
	So you go up to these academics and you say, I got a bit of a conundrum here.
	Um, I want to call this group white nationalists, but there's lots of black dudes and gays and Jews and stuff involved.
	In fact, they have a Jewish division in Israel.
	Yeah, no problem.
	Hold on.
	Done!
	Oh, that was quick.
	Yeah, it's called multi-racial white supremacy.
	And people of color are attracted to this movement because they like the patriotism and the sexism and the Islamophobia and all that other traditionalism.
	Yeah, but what about the racism?
	They ignore that part.
	Hmm.
	So black people hang out with racists because they love nationalism that much?
	Yes.
	Fine.
	You know what?
	Fine.
	We're on deadline.
	Thank you.
	And they get off.
	So Pepe is like this and Kekistan and all that stuff.
	And they are ways of saying, I like Trump.
	I'm fine with American patriotism.
	And I really enjoy triggering you because you think everything is racist.
	And it makes you nuts to go like this because you're a snowflake.
	And I love to trigger you.
	So instead of me getting up and saying, point of privilege, point of privilege, and doing this instead of clapping hands, instead of doing any of those stupid rules and believing in that we need 14 bathrooms and your infinite genders and all that crap, I'm just going to have fun.
	I'm not playing your game.
	I don't even necessarily love Trump.
	This is the guy who likes Pepe I'm talking about.
	And part of me enjoying triggering you is this frog named Pepe.
	So I'm going to use Pepe the Frog.
	And the people who think everything is racist go, that's racist, this is racist, milk is racist, Pepe the Frog, that's racist.
	And you go, whatever, dude, I don't give a shit.
	I just don't like you.
	I don't like your authority.
	I don't like your tyranny.
	I don't like your infinite rules.
	I want to have fun.
	I want to be free.
	That's what Pepe means.
	So they go, no, it doesn't.
	It means Nazis.
	In fact, I saw a Pepe where he had a swastika on.
	Yeah, it's all of that.
	It's total and utter anarchy.
	It means no fucking rules.
	And it means fun and joking around.
	It's called humor.
	So they go, no it doesn't, it means fascism, okay.
	Now the Chinese in Hong Kong are getting oppressed by mainland communist China.
	China wants Hong Kong back and they want to impose all their crazy rules and they want to be able to extradite people from Hong Kong, which is basically America, it's western, and bring them over to China where they can punish them and put them in re-education camps and treat them like Human garbage.
	I mean, I'm not a huge Muslim guy, but the way they're treating Muslims in mainland China is shocking.
	Death camps.
	They're murdering them on the street, just taking their organs.
	China is a shithole.
	China is hell.
	God, the way they treat dogs alone should be enough to make you mad.
	But, um, and I lived there for a long time, so I know what I'm talking about.
	They bred dogs on my roof for food.
	It's not an esoteric thing.
	That's in Taiwan, not even mainland China.
	Anyway, they go to the academics and they go, hey, I got something for you.
	What do you got?
	Okay, you told us the frog is racist, right?
	Yeah, it's a Nazi frog.
	And Kekistan, that flag they do, that's the Nazi flag.
	Okay, I got it.
	My problem is that people in China are using the frog.
	And they're people of color.
	So how do I call it like a white nationalist movement now?
	And they go, hold on.
	Okay, the frog in America is a racist symbol.
	But in China, they don't know that.
	And they think it's just a frog.
	So people of color are ignorant.
	Oh, yeah, hold on.
	Actually, just I made a video of my explanation.
	Uh, I think it explains it better than I ever could.
	I'm trying to make him look dumb.
	I'm trying to make them look ignorant, aren't they?
	I'm trying to make them look dumb.
	I'm trying to make them look ignorant, aren't they?
	Like Chinese people aren't familiar with the internet in Hong Kong.
	The mask allows you to feel emotionally bonded with the movement.
	This figure expresses a wide range of emotions.
	It expresses humor, anger, sadness, love.
	I love it.
	Just pause.
	Don't you love how academics are just experts on everything?
	They're all Marxists.
	Marxists dress so gross.
	They always look like they're under house arrest with their wet cardigans and their greasy hair and their funky glasses.
	You know her shoes are Birkenstocks or Crocs or something.
	You know her pants are brown.
	And they just have this smug arrogance.
	There's no interrogative when you talk to her.
	She's here to tell you what it's like.
	This is not a theory.
	These are facts.
	Go ahead.
	Just pause.
	You catch that?
	too analytical, too rational.
	Do you know that in the U.S.
	Just pause.
	You catch that?
	So she's telling us that these protesters are not rational.
	That's why they're using Pepe.
	They're misinformed.
	They're stupid.
	There's a Nazi, of course.
	Okay, pause.
	I'm aware of that.
	I think all image and all words can carry both sides of messages.
	So I think it's the way we use it that matters.
	Just like in the United States, before Pepe became an overt figure of hate speech, he was also used in a more innocent way, and it's also the same in Hong Kong.
	He was first used as just a cute image.
	Okay, pause.
	So I think I get her explanation.
	Here in America, Pepe started out as nice, and then it became a Nazi image.
	So, Hong Kong is just in the first phase, the nice phase.
	I'm still right, it's still a Nazi image.
	Instead of the scientist being confronted with data that contradicts her belief system and going, maybe I should re-evaluate, she just goes, no, that's an evolution of Pepe.
	He starts out nice and then becomes a Nazi.
	Instead of her going, oh, they're using it in Hong Kong, maybe I'm wrong about Pepe.
	Is that possible?
	Maybe I'm wrong about OK.
	Is that possible?
	Nope.
	I'm right.
	It's very hard to be in this movement and to confront violence.
	That's a Chinese propaganda footage they're throwing in there.
	Some hole.
	What's your favorite one?
	This one.
	Hope.
	Hope.
	Boy, that woman was annoying.
	I'm going to replicate that guy's background for his phone.
	Imagine spending 60 grand to hear her, wherever the fuck she's from, sit there in her gross cardigan and tell you what life is like after having never experienced it herself.
	That would be depressing.
	Yeah.
	I think I just went another four grand in debt today to hear nothing but horse shit.
	You are stupider when you come out of university.
	And you're in a debt you'll never pay.
	I know rich guys.
	250 grand is a ton of fucking money.
	Go up to a multi-millionaire and say, yeah, you're getting sued.
	Worst case scenario, it'll be 250 grand.
	And he'll go, Jesus, are you kidding me?
	250 grand?
	God damn it.
	Shit!
	Wow!
	That's a chunk of change!
	I'm suing the S.B.L.C.
	It's costing $261,000.
	It took 7,000 people to amass that.
	So you and your stupid M.I.U.
	debt have to mimic 7,000 people who are mad as hell and not gonna take it anymore.
	Go look at a concert with 7,000 people.
	That's your fucking debt.
	And for what?
	Jesus!
	What a catastrophe.
	I know what you're thinking.
	You're thinking, Gav, but you're sending your kids to college.
	My kids are Indians.
	They're getting in for free.
	17 different universities offer free scholarships for American Indians.
	I'm good.
	But even then, I don't want them to go.
	But what am I going to do?
	You may not go to college, 18-year-old.
	I don't want them to.
	Believe me.
	All right.
	I think we're ready for calls now, right?
	We've got all the topical news stuff.
	Everything else I have on the list here is, oh, we didn't do our greatest hits.
	Yep.
	All right, let's do that quickly.
	Do you have it queued up?
	Yeah, I got a couple of moments.
	All right, we had a fun little section.
	Lilly Singh, of course, her whole thing is that I'm brown and you're not.
	And she had a white noise game show where you played white noise, like someone wearing Birkenstocks, and then you all laughed at how corny white people are.
	This, of course, was written by white people and brought to the show by a white guy.
	So we played the game with her.
	Bisexual Sikh Lily Singh has a show.
	It's called A Little Late, and it's totally devoted to the fact that Lilly Singh is not white.
	She goes over this again and again in every segment, in the opening monologue.
	It's real tedious if you're not Lilly Singh, which is the majority of the population.
	This is a game segment.
	I haven't heard this yet, but I'm going to play along with the guest and Lilly and see if we can have some fun on one of the least fun shows I've ever heard of.
	Hey, Lily.
	Oh, Rainn Wilson.
	Hi, is now an OK time?
	Well, hello, Rainn Wilson!
	What are you doing here?
	This isn't rehearsed at all.
	Oh, my God.
	Oh, my God.
	What are you doing here?
	Oh, man, I just wanted to stop by and congratulate you on all your success.
	I mean, her very own talk show!
	Just pause.
	Do you recognize her, by the way?
	She does these YouTube videos where she goes, Hello, I am a Sikh.
	You need to get married.
	I am conservative.
	And then all the other Sikhs watch it.
	And Indians and Pakistanis and Bangladeshis and basically most East Asian brown people watch and go, Oh my God, my mother's totally strict too.
	That is her hack shtick.
	And in the world of identity politics, that gets you a late night show.
	Amazing!
	I also wanted to bring you a gift.
	Fun.
	Now, I know most people bring wine or flowers and things like that, but I wanted to bring you something really special.
	That is so sweet of you.
	Here you go.
	Thank you, but what is it?
	It is an official Rainn Wilson white noise machine.
	I'm broadening my business horizons.
	Oh, cool, a white noise machine.
	He looks exactly like my real-life brother.
	Yeah, I've seen this before.
	They make, like, calming noises, like rain and birds and things like that, right?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, sort of.
	This one's a little bit different.
	Okay.
	Should we just try it?
	Yeah, give it a try.
	Let's do it.
	Go ahead.
	What is that?
	Wait, stop.
	What is that white noise?
	I got to say, that sounds like rubber boots.
	It sounds like a dark, murky, kind of muddy, sloppy place.
	He sounds like he's schlepping.
	I'm going to say that's Chris Casatelli.
	He's a maintenance engineer at Water Tunnel No. 3.
	Here in New York, they're building a whole new waterway to ensure that New Yorkers always get safe and clean drinking water.
	They've been building this since 1970.
	It's a brutal job.
	I think about 24 men have died since they started the building of this tunnel.
	It will be done in this year.
	I think 2020, de Blasio said, is the deadline.
	So despite all these dozens of deaths, We will have a new waterway system to keep New Yorkers safe and healthy.
	Am I right, Lillian Rain?
	I don't recognize that sound.
	It's Birkenstocks.
	It's Birkenstocks walking across the floor of an REI to go buy a Patagonia jacket.
	It's a white noise machine.
	Okay, I get it.
	Anyway, there's seven of those.
	They do.
	And they're all equally deprecating.
	Rainn Wilson, obviously an ethno-masochist who loves making fun of white people.
	He's a fake!
	Because he sucks.
	Okay, that's fine.
	Now let's see black people noise.
	Now let's see Sikh noise.
	Now let's see... Don't do it.
	Okay.
	You saw my mouth?
	Yeah, I saw you lean to the mic.
	No, no, no.
	The point is you can't do that.
	How do you make a sound for... It's the bigotry of low expectations and it's racist.
	It shows that we're not equal.
	And don't forget, just running through some other clips here, your parents stopping by.
	Oh, here was a fun one.
	This was what, Monday?
	Yep.
	Was it?
	Yeah.
	No, this was last Thursday.
	This was during the live show.
	We've already showed this?
	Oh yeah!
	There's no sense in showing that, it's already online.
	God.
	Gosh, guys.
	When I make mistakes, I get mad at you.
	Yes.
	Yeah, and there's a slew of other great stuff that was on there.
	Oh, the Shane Gillis thing.
	Shane Gillis was fired from SNL because he had made some rude comments.
	Just look up the video.
	He made some rude comments years and years in the past.
	And the rude comments taken in context weren't even him saying it.
	They were talking about how Chinatowns just spring up.
	And then he said, people are like, where'd all these places come from?
	And then he goes, people are like, what's with all the chinks?
	People are like.
	So he is actually lampooning racist ignorance.
	What are you showing, dude?
	Why would you do that?
	It's titled because that is Shane Gillis.
	That was the Shane Gillis chunk.
	That was the pre.
	Yeah.
	I don't want to watch all this though.
	Don't show the whole Shane Gillis thing.
	Everyone's seen this.
	I wanna show the fireman sketch.
	Okay.
	God, I just had a flash of shooting your head off with a shotgun and how freaked out I'd be after when I saw you just like with your brain spilling out.
	I go, fuck, fuck, fuck, what have I done?
	Oh, Jesus.
	Well, this is why I got confused, because we were talking about this clip.
	Shut up!
	Please.
	No one wants to know why you made a mistake on live television.
	Hi, everyone.
	So I clicked on that because, um, so he does this sketch.
	Last year, August 2018, he does this sketch.
	Where he's a fireman and he saves a bunch of Mexicans, no Guatemalans, from a burning building.
	And this guy digs up tweets where he used a racial epithet like, Hey Enz, wanna get pancakes?
	When he was drunk.
	And he also likes Trump.
	You couldn't get a picture of him wearing a Trump hat, by the way.
	Why did they have to photoshop that on?
	I assume they had a budget of a few thousand.
	Play some of it?
	An entire family up there.
	Not that it matters at all, but those were Mexicans.
	The family was in fact Guatemalan.
	Well, I didn't go to college.
	Are you saying on the record that all Hispanics look the same?
	What are you doing?
	Let's see some more footage.
	I love Trump.
	I love Donald Trump so much.
	They get his friend Barry on the line.
	Barry says, that's who, when he said, hey, Anne's want to get pancakes.
	And then, as if it's not spooky enough, you've got to find spooky after this, by the way.
	They say, they dox his address and they say he lives in Haverford, PA.
	Can you find that in the sketch, please?
	You left the sketch?
	Nope.
	Okay.
	Haverford, PA was the fire department that two weeks ago was shut down because they found the vice president of the firehouse was a proud boy.
	And they were worried that that meant he wouldn't save a burning building full of Mexicans because he's just a racist because he loves Trump and he's a proud boy.
	That's how it works.
	You're like, die Mexicans.
	I'm not.
	No, no, no.
	I'm not aiming my fire hose at you.
	And then in this video, The chief of police fires him because they say he won't be able to protect people of color.
	He gets fired.
	The same place, Haverford, Pennsylvania.
	So, one, Shane Gillis plays a character named Shane McGillis, who is fired for his past social media comments, which happened to Shane Gillis.
	Two, the firehouse is Haverford, PA, which is the same firehouse that got shut down in real life.
	And then three, The first, the top comment on that video is, this is way funnier than SNL.
	How spooky is that?
	Look up Harry and Paul.
	Scottish, Scotland is best or something.
	Scottish people.
	All right.
	I was going to do a whole thing on Me Too and how I was thinking at the gym today, because we were doing a class and one of the boxers there goes, are you doing the class?
	And he goes, yeah, me too.
	And I go, you got me too'd?
	That sucks, man.
	Are you OK?
	And then it's got me thinking how unfathomable that is.
	And it kind of shows, I'll probably do a whole green screen video on this, that men and women are very, very different.
	And the fact that we keep pretending we're the same is ridiculous, because If I was trying to get a job, and someone was like, yeah, I think you'd be good for the job, but first, I think you just suck my tits.
	I'd go, what?
	Oh, okay.
	You want to dump him out?
	Right.
	What do we got?
	Is that enough?
	How are we doing?
	Or even if she said, I need you to eat me out.
	Oh, you can't have the job.
	I'd go, you're kind of fat and old, but okay.
	Do you want to lie down now?
	How do you want to do this?
	And that happened to me, not to me personally, but advice.
	There was, I guess I'm doing the bit now after saying I don't have time for it.
	There's a guy, Felix Wittholtz, he runs a thing called Helios and I remember in the mid-90s when we just started out, I think we were still Voice, Voice of Montreal, we're trying to get ads and all the people who decide, especially record label ads, all those marketing women who dole out the dough, they're all women and they Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts, absolutely.
	They would basically demand sexual favors, and they would torment these young sales guys.
	I wasn't a sales guy at Vice, but the sales guys would go out on dates, eat out their old ass, suck their gross tits, and it wasn't a big deal.
	It was just like, in fact, I think Felix invented the word cougar.
	I honestly believe he was the first to ever use the word cougar.
	And at Vice, we used to say we ate our way to the top.
	I remember one story that drove me nuts.
	Our sales guy was out for dinner with this ugly old 45-year-old Asian chubby chick with short hair, and she's on the phone, puts down the phone, and he's sitting there like, oh Jesus Christ, I can't believe I have to go out on this date to get this client.
	And she has her hand like this, and she goes, hey.
	Wow.
	I don't know if you can see my hand.
	I don't know why, but I will pop a gasket if anyone ever goes like this.
	Beckoning drives me insane.
	It's like my trigger.
	And he even hated it.
	And she just goes, meaning, put your hand in my hand.
	And he had to sort of go, ugh.
	But he did it.
	And that's fine.
	He didn't care.
	It's totally different with women.
	And by the way, ladies, with this Me Too thing, if you fellate someone for a job and then don't report it, or some guy jerks off in a plant, you let it go, you are allowing him to do it again.
	Yeah, but it's really hard to report things.
	We had a civil war, 620,000 men died.
	You can be uncomfortable.
	But you have to report these men to police.
	We have laws for this.
	You can't just do it, get the job, and then whine about it two years later.
	You facilitated him doing it to more women.
	Yeah, but it's embarrassing to say it to police in private, so the best thing to do is air it out publicly in front of millions of people.
	Social media.
	Retards.
	You know what it is?
	What?
	Massive room!
	Spooky!
	Spooky!
	I forgot that he sort of... Me too!
	He goes backwards, he goes, Spooky!
	Go back more though.
	This is that archetypal Scottish person.
	I know them well.
	Every time you go to Scotland there's that one guy in the pub who's got a new way of looking at life.
	- Can you worry about him, Paul?
	We're not all like that.
	I take a sideways look at life.
	Imagine if we didn't have doors.
	It'd be like we're all living in one massive room.
	Spooky, huh? - Wait, did the person who uploaded that play it backwards?
	Or is that just him?
	I don't know.
	Spooky hair!
	No, I think they did reverse it.
	It looks reversed.
	But also in the, um... Spooky hair!
	Yeah, it is reversed.
	Yeah.
	Um, in the ad world, I used to run an ad agency and we'd be dealing with the Velvet Mafia, they're called, the gay mafia.
	They were all over advertising.
	And if you're a homophobe, you're doomed.
	I'm not a homophobe, but there'd be guys that would say, you know, if you'd let me suck you off, you could have this contract like that.
	And you know how long I would cry in the shower for?
	I'd just go, fuck off, Eddie.
	And he'd go, all right, well, whatever.
	And then I could go out for beers with that guy.
	And I go, maybe a year later, I'd go, remember when you said that we couldn't get this contract unless you suck me off?
	He's like, sorry, look, if you don't want to do it, don't do it.
	I go, you son of a bitch.
	Anyway, clink.
	Like, I didn't give a shit.
	The answer's no.
	Yeah, but what if it would end your career?
	I've ended my career a million times.
	No one's blowing me with a beard.
	I'm not gonna feel a beard on my bag.
	Oops.
	I will!
	I don't know if you heard that, but a car horn honked.
	Speak for yourself!
	Beep beep!
	There's free blowjobs?
	Honk!
	That'd be a funny shirt, free blowjobs.
	But honk, yes please.
	No, that wouldn't be a funny shirt.
	Alright!
	We covered everything we want to cover.
	I guess we can take some calls.
	But we're way late now.
	And let's really, like, one point, get the guy's message in, and as soon as I say thank you, fucking hang up.
	We're not having conversations.
	By the way, hey Gavin wanted to let you know that YouTube unsubscribed me from your channel.
	I didn't realize for a whole month until yesterday.
	Thought you'd like to know for your lawsuit.
	Good luck!
	Keep up with the great content.
	See?
	It's proven!
	Maybe what they're doing is I get 10 new subscribers and then they kill 10 of my subscriptions so the number stays at 350k.
	That's true.
	Sinister robots.
	And by the way, speaking of robots, when I say, fuck robots, stop talking about them, I mean humanoid, hello, what's happening?
	I know there's such a thing as artificial intelligence.
	I know algorithms are going to start fucking with our lives.
	I've always warned about that.
	That is a true bonafide danger.
	But an actual human face on a thing?
	I don't want to hear that again.
	Yes, there is automation.
	Yes, you can order a Big Mac now by pushing buttons.
	Yes, factories are going more than ever.
	I'm not talking about those.
	I'm saying I don't want to hear any more about threats from human-looking things.
	Got it.
	As sex dolls or butlers or anything.
	They don't exist and they never will.
	Makes sense.
	Stop buying scratch-offs.
	It's called a statistical improbability.
	Statistical improbability.
	A statistical improbability.
	Very difficult to trade.
	By the way, did you think that this guy is Fleckus in the background of this?
	That he's in the background there?
	That's Fleckus, dude.
	Yeah, I think you're right.
	And the guy that pointed out was Graham, and that's the guy who made this, their Milo and I thing.
	That video just keeps getting weirder and weirder and weirder.
	Yeah, yeah, there's a lot to it.
	You know what would make me poo my pants?
	And I don't believe in any of this shit.
	But if Shane Gillis told me, Yeah man you know what really freaks me out is uh before I made that video I uh I have a Haitian friend and he took me to this voodoo doctor this juju guy a juju man and he made me burn a bit of cat fur and I had to cut my finger and then he had a chicken foot in there and we stirred it up and we lit it on fire and buried it in my backyard and that video did awesome for me uh kind of changed my life but there's something creepy about it if that if you told me that and I could prove it
	I would poop my pants.
	Yeah.
	I would poop my panties.
	We got, we got callers back.
	All right.
	So, uh, it dropped out.
	The Skype just like hung up, but we got all the callers back.
	Okay.
	And so far we got... Hey, how's it going, dude?
	Hey, what's up Gavin?
	Not much.
	Hey, I was wondering why do you still live in New York?
	What is the point of living there for you anymore?
	You can do your job anywhere.
	Do you have kids?
	I think he hung up.
	Nope.
	Do you have kids?
	Uh, no.
	Alright, thanks for calling.
	This is like when gay dudes call me and say, like, there was this dude, he used to run radar.
	And he goes, so a few more questions before we're done the interview.
	Who do you hang out with now?
	I got three kids.
	Like tonight, my daughter has dance.
	My youngest son's going to boxing.
	My other son has practice, baseball practice, like friends.
	Who has time for friends?
	I meet a few blue collar dudes at the local dive on 52nd during happy hour.
	But besides that, did I just give away our studio address?
	Besides that, I don't have a social life.
	And as far as moving goes, my kid is well established.
	He's got his baseball team.
	He's got his whole baseball friends.
	And, and I don't like the idea of being on the run, running and hiding.
	You know, you can't, because you don't like my politics.
	I have to go move.
	Yeah.
	How about F you?
	Yeah.
	Hey, Austin politics, immigration border.
	Hey, Gavin, Brian.
	Hello.
	Can you hear me?
	Hey man.
	Can you hear me?
	Yep!
	Hey, uh, so I just wanted to say, the topic of the border, so I live in Arizona, in the southern part of Arizona.
	We are fucking slapping the face with all these immigrants.
	Yeah, we have congress people from Maine, North Dakota, towards Canada, pissed about wanting a border.
	You know what I'm saying?
	It's like, you don't live in the southern part.
	Trump won these southern states because we want a fucking border.
	So why is somebody from Maine telling us in Arizona that we can't have a border?
	But don't you feel like Maine is concerned about you in Arizona?
	Maine isn't saying we're sick of Mexicans.
	Maine is saying we're worried about, like when we talk about closed borders, one of the biggest concerns is black people in Southern California who want to flip burgers.
	They can't do it if they're, if they don't speak Spanish.
	One of the hardest people hit are blue working class people along the border.
	I'm not a, did I say blue?
	I meant black working class people along the border.
	I'm not a black working class person.
	But I don't like that they're affected detrimentally.
	Yeah.
	He just built a bunch of wall, too.
	Two weeks ago, that wasn't there.
	50 miles.
	I think it was 50 miles.
	50 miles of wall?
	I've heard he hasn't built a lot of wall.
	He just signed it today.
	Alright.
	Let's move along.
	We have Connor.
	Hey, Connor.
	Hello.
	Hey.
	Yeah, I just wanted to talk.
	This is kind of directed towards Ryan.
	Ryan, I just wanted to thank you for that song, Our Last Night.
	That was a pretty good song.
	He called me a fag, but I listened from shit to Dean Martin to, you know, the Rolling Stones and Bad Brains and Biggie Smalls.
	So I enjoyed that song.
	I've been playing it a lot, and you're not a fag, Ryan.
	You're not a fag.
	Awesome call.
	I don't like that call.
	Anything that's nice to Ryan, I don't like.
	What song is he talking about?
	Our Last Night.
	That's the band or the song?
	That's a metal song.
	Hey, what's going on fellas?
	Hey man.
	Um, Gavin.
	So, you're from Canada, right?
	I'm curious.
	A. Are you a fan of the NHL?
	And B. If you are, who's your team?
	And C. If you don't have a team, can we adopt the Bruins for the show?
	They're the right colors and all what not.
	Yeah, I'm okay with adopting the Bruins for the right colors.
	The Pirates would be the right colors, too.
	I grew up playing street hockey.
	I wasn't really into organized sports.
	I guess because it was, like, punk was anti-sports.
	You may want to check in on the song, Sports, by Sand in the Face.
	But my team would be the Habs.
	The Montreal Canadiens.
	But I don't watch hockey that much.
	I think it's a great sport.
	I enjoy it.
	But I'm a baseball guy.
	I'm a Mets man.
	And that fills up all my time.
	I mean, baseball is every fucking day.
	Oh, you have the song, Sports?
	God, this is a jam.
	I got the album.
	Let me see, we gotta find it.
	Here we go.
	Sports, got it.
	Frankly, this is such a good jam.
	This band is awesome.
	Show them the album cover.
	This chick is super hot, but almost retarded dumb.
	So perfect.
	Pewds Alright.
	We have Kevin Bluetooth.
	Kevin Bluetooth.
	What's up, Kevin?
	Hey.
	Yeah.
	So, we're all men here, right?
	We're all adults.
	Obviously, I can get a boner.
	There's no problem there, but with your promo code, getting six of those Bluetooths for free, it's pretty much a no-brainer, right?
	Yes.
	So, I went ahead and did it.
	I got them in the mail.
	Took one about an hour before the old lady was getting off work.
	She got home.
	She starts telling me about her day.
	All of a sudden, just starts fucking chillin' up.
	Like, mid-conversation.
	So I said to myself, fuck it, let's just see what happens.
	I'm gonna pull it out while she's talking to me, and she's just gonna look at my boner, and we're just gonna get after it.
	So I pulled it out.
	Very impressive.
	Bigger than normal.
	And she's like, uh, Devin, I'm not finished telling you about my day.
	And so I'm like, Oh God.
	Yeah.
	Pardon me.
	Uh, proceed.
	So I swear to God for the next 15 minutes, She sat there and told me about how her day at work went.
	All the while, I'm full staff, never even thought to go limp for a second.
	Boner out, just talking to me like, you know, normal conversation.
	Then, you know, usually walking takes your boner away.
	I walked upstairs, full boner, and she followed me up.
	And yeah, I'm going to go ahead and endorse Bluetooth.
	So it did eventually go down.
	I wore her out.
	You did have sex with your wife.
	Oh yeah, I fucking wore her ass out.
	That's wonderful.
	Thank you for calling very much.
	It's, yeah, a lot of men, and I made this mistake a million times, we think we're women or men.
	So if a girl was just to like show you her tits, you'd go, oh, like if you were, here's an example I always use.
	If you were to getting on a plane, right?
	Doop, doop, doop, going up the stairs and the stewardess just pulled up her dress and showed you her vagina and said, eat it.
	You'd go, uh, okay, I guess.
	Here?
	Yeah, that's the only thing you'd say.
	Right now?
	Okay, my family's here.
	And then the guy behind you, his wife would go, what the fuck?
	And the guy behind you would go, he'd say to his wife, just calm down, Rachel, okay?
	Just calm down.
	This is not going to take long.
	And then he'd be staring.
	But any time, any time of day, we're available.
	And if you show us boobs or send us a picture of your area and it's a shitty picture that's not flattering, we'll still be like, whoa, nice.
	That's why men send dick pics.
	Because they think women have men's brains and women are going, oh yeah, that's my cup of tea.
	They don't think like that.
	So when you just, when she comes home and you're just like, well, well, well.
	Well, look what we have here.
	You know what's weird?
	They don't go, oh, they go, what are you doing?
	The way you seduce married women, your wife, is you watch their show.
	You watch Real Housewives.
	You comment on it.
	You have a glass of wine.
	You have to watch the entire show and be like, she's a bitch.
	I hate her.
	Oh my god, why doesn't she just tell her that she was cheating on Max?
	And then, maybe even a massage, then you're in the zone.
	You've got to slow-boat it.
	And they're not visual, so don't do that.
	But there are anomalies.
	Well, you're a young man.
	That's different.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I mean, because I've noticed something.
	What about female autism?
	Very rare.
	Interesting, right?
	Yeah.
	We got a famous anonymous topic.
	Antica at the border.
	Okay.
	Antifa?
	Yeah.
	Hey Gavin, what's up?
	Big fan.
	I just want to share a little ironic story with you.
	So this one is an incident that happened just a little bit ago where an agent went out into the city.
	Mind you, this is the middle of the fucking day.
	Bright daylights.
	And I guess he went out to get some food.
	They wouldn't tell us exactly where he went.
	But when he comes back, his vehicle is completely fucking vandalized.
	His tires are flashed, and on the vehicle it's written, Fascist Ameri-KKKA.
	But the irony is, the vehicle most of the time belongs to a fucking Mexican agent.
	Yeah, isn't that weird?
	That's what I was talking about earlier, thanks for calling by the way, where they present this case to the academics and they go, I agree with you, Nazis are bad, but I keep finding black dudes.
	So they pretzel this logic where they go, have you seen this where they have black cops protecting a nice thing and they're calling them house ends?
	And you're the white man's bitch.
	And even when Antifa beat up those two Marines in Philly who were there for that, whatever it was called, a day of freedom or something.
	And they were calling them wetbacks and spics and spitting at them and punching them.
	It all goes out the window.
	All they care about is winning.
	They don't really care about racism.
	It's just a helpful tool.
	But it's like they're playing golf with a baseball bat.
	All they want to do is hit the ball and get it over there.
	And they don't care what the game is or how it's played.
	They just need to win.
	That was a terrible analogy.
	That was bad.
	Eric Wiener!
	Or Eric Anthony Wiener.
	Hey, what's up?
	Hey man.
	What's up?
	Hey, I have my own Anthony Wiener scandal to talk about.
	It reminded me of it when you were talking about all those photos you have of those naked women before you were married that you still hold on to.
	Yep.
	I found this laptop when I was about 20 and I forgot I had it.
	Uh, when I found it, I immediately destroyed it, fuckin' hit it with hammers, and, uh, I realized what was on there.
	I had that fuckin' laptop when I was in middle school and high school, and I went to school with absolute sluts.
	Um, it was kind of like, uh, you know, ex-girlfriends I had, and I'm like, you know, we're all older now and stuff, you know, but, you know, I was in kind of a little gray area, you know, you have pictures of, you know, When you were a kid with these girls, and I was like, you know what, I can't hold on to it.
	It's a weird little gray area, you know what I mean?
	I just thought it was funny, because when you talked about that, I was like, shit.
	I feel that, but man, that's a little too much.
	I'm glad I destroyed it, but, you know, it's kind of a weird little thing.
	Why would you destroy that?
	That's like covering up a tattoo.
	Well, I'd destroy it.
	That's your stuff.
	That's your memories.
	Never make it public, obviously.
	Never do revenge porn.
	You know, what he's saying is that they were underage at the time.
	Oh, yeah.
	Fucking destroy that.
	I've heard of dudes getting arrested, like, two- That's what I'm saying.
	Yeah, no, sorry, I didn't realize that.
	But I would ask, you know, we were all underage at that time, you know what I mean?
	So it's like, you know, I mean, I took a mental picture of it, got rid of it, but it was kind of a funny thing when you talked about that.
	I was like, man, did I do the right thing?
	No, you did the right thing if they're underage, for sure.
	Thanks for calling.
	Thanks for calling, dude.
	But yeah, we get it, right?
	But it wasn't very obvious, but what he's saying is that they were underage.
	I had a problem with that, too.
	I had a photo bucket where this girl sent me things, and we were both around, I don't know, whatever age. 14?
	I heard about a dude who exchanged sexy pictures with his girlfriend when he was 13 or 14, then he became 17, and they were still on his phone, and he was charged with having child pornography.
	And she was still with him?
	I don't know if they broke up or something.
	He didn't show it to anyone, but it was, you own child pornography if you did it when you were a child.
	Wow.
	So yeah.
	I remember, I remember my, my, my porn history was found by somebody, my uncle who was like looking at the thing and I was like 13 years old so I was looking for like I typed in teen, but at that time, you can look up teen porn now, if you're a wanker, and it's not a weird deal.
	Like, that's actually, they promote that, but they saw teen porn, they're like, what are you doing?
	I was like, I'm a fucking teen.
	Why are you creeped out?
	You know?
	What, am I supposed to look at old lady porn?
	Like you?
	The old bag.
	Yeah, I fucked 16-year-olds when I was 16.
	Yeah.
	It sucked.
	Sorry, guys.
	It was awkward.
	It was horrible.
	Clammy and... 35.
	They should be 35.
	Rigid.
	Alright, what do we got next?
	We're running out of time.
	Dudu from ATL.
	What's up, ATL?
	Hey, Gavin!
	It's your boy Dudu Jones from ATL!
	What's up, Dudu?
	Hey, I'm a longtime fan.
	I used to cover up with Vice Magazine at night.
	Right on.
	Cool.
	Alright, well thanks for calling.
	It was great to hear from you.
	it's too hot down man all right well thanks for calling it was great to hear from you you know you got to be a little more uh wary of callers But that was Doo-Doo Jones!
	You know, you gotta be aware that there's Nazis who are gonna call in and try to blow up our spot, or I was worried that guy was gonna shit on Blue Chew, so you gotta be a little more adult and recognize that not everyone's your fucking friend, okay?
	I just like Doo-Doo Jones.
	Sorry, Doo-Doo.
	Hey, it's Christian.
	Yo, Gab, can you hear me?
	Yeah, man.
	All right, so I have an idea for you.
	You should call in to Stern one day and do listen every morning.
	And because I think he would pick up if you just said, hey, this is Gavin McGinnis, leader of the Proud Boys.
	I want to talk to Howard.
	I think his ego is just so big that he thinks that he can just wally-wop you in like some sort of argument.
	But in reality, you would merc him and it would just be funny to just piss on his big ego on a show.
	I'll try, but aren't you on hold for an hour and a half when you call Stern?
	I hung up.
	That seems way too long.
	I'm not, who has an hour and a half?
	I remember one time I was on a road trip in Canada and I was visiting from America.
	I had an American phone.
	This isn't long ago.
	And I, there was some talk show and they're making a mistake about something about guns or something.
	And I had to correct them.
	So I stayed on hold for about an hour of my road trip in near Toronto.
	And my bill was like 300 bucks.
	Ish.
	Anyway, I don't, I'm not staying on hold.
	I don't have that kind of time.
	I mean, I'm already fucking, Press for time.
	We got Sean Box.
	Hi!
	Hey, Gavin.
	Hey, man.
	Hello?
	Hello!
	Hi, in your last episode, you talked about women looking great when they go crazy.
	Yeah.
	So I was holding pads for this girl in boxing, and first of all, she hit like a girl.
	Second of all, She smelled so good and she was sweating like a dog.
	If that was me, I would smell like a corpse.
	Right.
	So I was just thinking about that.
	And also the big thing with Facebook is that up until now, they publicly never said that they're a publisher.
	They're a platform, so you can't sue them.
	They're not liable.
	But now the big thing is that they publicly said that they're a publisher, so they're liable for everything on their platform.
	Well, they say both.
	If you look at those legal documents, they say they're a platform.
	And thanks for calling, by the way.
	And they also say that they're a publisher.
	So if you want to sue them, well, then they're just a platform.
	And they show you that they're a platform, and they're like a sieve, and your lawsuit goes through them to the person who made the post.
	But, when they won a medal with elections and other things, they say they're a publisher.
	We had Chadwick Moore on the show the other day, who sort of broke the story, and it looks like they're gonna continue to be this amorphous blob that you can't prosecute.
	So, the fact that they came out and said, we're a publisher, doesn't really mean anything, because they also said they're a platform, and they're so fucking powerful, That we can't sue them.
	I mean, Laura Loomer had her case thrown out.
	So we'll see how that affects my case with the SPLC.
	But I feel like if I can nail the SPLC, that can be the beginning of something much bigger with big tech.
	But it's not easy suing multi-billion dollar corporations that can control the narrative.
	The real question is, will they control the next election?
	All right, we got to wrap it up here.
	How many calls do we got?
	We have about eight.
	Hey, Rick, you're on the line.
	Bachelor parties.
	Yo, what's up, fuckers?
	Hey, man.
	So, uh, my friends and I are taking our engaged buddy to New York City.
	He's never been for his bachelor party.
	He has no idea.
	We want to know some good neighborhoods to avoid and good neighborhoods that'd be good for, like, bar hopping and getting, you know, destroyed on some nose beers.
	All right.
	Thank you for calling.
	That's a very helpful call and a very important call.
	Here's what I would do.
	If you're coming to New York City and you don't know it, there are plenty of ads at the back of these news weeklies that have services.
	Usually when you rent a limousine, they have guys who can handle bachelor parties.
	And what they do is the limousine company will set you up with strippers who come on the limousine and not literally.
	And they come along for the ride, they get nude, they horse around with each other.
	You can't take pictures but you can use the light on your phone to see them better.
	And that limousine service, not only do they have a deal with the girls, but they also have a deal with maybe 15 bars.
	They won't be the best bars in the world.
	They'll be kind of normie bars, but you'll be in very safe neighborhoods like the West Village and the East Village and maybe even Midtown.
	You don't want to go to Brooklyn.
	You don't want to end up in East New York and Bushwick or somewhere where you're going to get taken advantage of.
	And the beauty of those package deals is everyone pays.
	It's not that much.
	It'll be like maybe a hundred bucks from 10 guys, a thousand bucks.
	And then that's the night handled.
	You obviously have to pay for your beer where you go to various places, but you go to a bar for maybe 15-20 minutes and then it's back in the limo with the naked ladies who are there waiting for you and they're dancing around.
	It's just a wonderful, wonderful time and you know there's no sex or anything gross.
	I think it's gross using prostitutes but that's the way to do it.
	Get a package deal and don't do it on your own.
	That's crazy.
	You're going to a city that I know it's much safer than it was in the 80s and 90s.
	There's still a murder a day.
	We're still at about 350 murders a year.
	Those are all in East New York, but if you're on your own, you might end up in East New York.
	So please don't do that.
	All right.
	Next, maybe three more callers and we got Bob.
	What's up, Bob?
	What's up, Bob?
	Alright, next call.
	Okay.
	Why do you keep going?
	You should be focused on the calls, but you keep putting the camera on yourself.
	How could you be so useless and also so vain?
	Shouldn't you be insecure?
	Well, what I do is I pick up the call, and then I go to this camera, and then I go, Hey!
	Yeah, we don't need to see your face.
	What's up, guys?
	Hey, man.
	Hey, just real quick, in the past year, year and a half, I got married, got my wife pregnant, and not to like boost your ego, but you were definitely an instrumental part in pushing me in that direction.
	That's fantastic news.
	Especially when you said, you know, you're 30 years old, you've been partying for 15 years, it's time to settle down.
	That spoke, it was like going to church.
	And we need more fatherhood advice.
	Going forward.
	Less politics, more fatherhood.
	That's what I'm looking for.
	You're right, and I should do that.
	I should talk about fatherhood more.
	I should talk about my kids more.
	Thank you very much for that and I appreciate you acknowledging my input.
	Partying from 14, that's when you first start stealing beer from your parents' liquor cabinet, right?
	Now you're 30!
	25, 15 years of partying.
	How much coke do you need to do?
	Look, I understand your party years.
	I had my party years too.
	It's awesome.
	That's a chapter.
	Turn the page.
	Now we have a whole new life.
	When you start having kids and you're hanging out with them and you're helping them with their homework and you're teaching them how to ride their bike.
	That's a whole new high.
	That's what I talk about in my book, Death of Cool.
	Where, yes, your party years are good.
	It's over now.
	It's time to grow up.
	I can't talk to people who don't have kids.
	I just feel like saying, get your shit together.
	And they don't have their shit together.
	And it's sad, you know, drinking.
	You get brutal hangovers when you're over 30, and you're doing coke, and your nose is bleeding.
	Like, what the fuck?
	And here's another thing.
	You've been with this girl for, say, six months, even a year, right?
	And I say, if you're living together, you haven't had a drop-down, drag-out fight, what are you waiting for?
	Her but with bigger tits?
	Her but with a vagina that rotates and it's sockets?
	I don't understand what you need.
	She doesn't have to be a soulmate.
	She doesn't have to be perfect.
	She's a great mate for you.
	Put a fucking ring on it and grow up, pussies.
	Joe from Pirelli, New Mexico.
	What's up, Joe?
	Kevin, what's going on, guys?
	Trump did a really smart thing.
	He threw the rally out here Monday on Indian land.
	It's owned by the casino out here.
	So the protesters were quarantined off down by where the sewer smell was.
	So they got all mad and left.
	But there were 20,000 people there.
	I stood in the sun for five and a half hours and the number of young people in line, we just had a blast in line.
	People smiling, just the happiest people I've ever been in contact with.
	It was like, you know, I just kept walking up to people going, hey, you're my people!
	Yeah.
	Yeah, my favorite thing about Trump are the supporters.
	It's sort of like titmen.
	I'm not a titman, but I really like titmen.
	They seem to be good people.
	You know, we were on vacation recently and I was at Trump Tower and it was cool being by the pool at Trump Tower, the vacation resort, because you're looking at some chick who's sipping a drink and you think, she's cool.
	He's cool.
	That couple's cool.
	Those fat people eating a burrito are cool.
	Like you knew everyone was basically on the same page because you're not gonna hate Trump and stay at the Trump Hotel.
	But isn't it funny how those 20,000 people, you can't show that on social media.
	Facebook is shutting that down.
	If Trump would have to film it and put it on his Twitter in order to show people that there was tens of thousands of people at his rally.
	All right, thanks for calling.
	All right, we got Joshua, Massachusetts.
	I'm running out of steam, dude.
	Hey, Gavin.
	Hey, man.
	How do you start your own chapter of the Proud Boys?
	There's stuff for that.
	I think if you go to officialproudboys.com or Proud Boy Mag or officialproudboys.usa, they got a bunch of that stuff.
	There's a whole rigmarole you go through, but I can't really help you with that on this show.
	You know, they're not, the myth is that they're out there recruiting.
	They want to recruit.
	No, it's at a good number now.
	Each meet-up in each city seems to be about 30 people.
	That's a good amount of people.
	No one wants thousands.
	It's not like Safeway or some insurance thing or Mary Kay Cosmetics where you need to expand.
	Yeah.
	Last I heard there was all this vetting and stuff too, so you gotta just... Yeah, there's vetting so they don't get Feds and Antifa in there.
	Casey, Nikki Pump Electric Lash.
	Hey, guys.
	Just wondering, number one, if Gavin heard about the Iggy Pop James Bond song that just came out.
	I felt like it was lambasting the new actress and just SJW mentality in general.
	And also, I remember you talking about Electro Clash and how it could have been the new punk.
	I was wondering if you could expound on that, because I was a big fan of that back in the day.
	Yeah, I think it died.
	Electroclash died because people were petrified that they were going to become commodified.
	So they killed the whole movement.
	It ended.
	It was sort of sad too because it was like, I don't know, it's like a boxer who's got this incredible punch and they think he's fit and he goes, no, you're going to exploit me.
	I'll be the next Mike Tyson.
	My manager will get rich and I'll get nothing.
	Fuck you.
	I'm not boxing.
	And then he goes and takes lacrosse, and we don't have this great boxer.
	So it was the death of a cool movement.
	I think Fischer Spooner were the most interesting part of Electro Class.
	They were so weird.
	It was like over-polished, over-produced, yet at the same time, they'd stop a show, mid-show, and go, stop, stop.
	What is she doing over there?
	Everyone, I want all these dancers to get down from there.
	Let's start the song again.
	It was kind of brilliant.
	And it was because it was done by artists and not really musicians, Warren Fischer and Casey Spooner.
	So I thought it was really awesome and it was exciting and it was like an 80s thing but uh it died on the vine because people are paranoid.
	But I haven't heard this Iggy Pop James Bond song.
	Is it a black female James Bond?
	What's it called?
	It's called James Bond.
	This is going to get us canceled off YouTube.
	She wants to be your James Bond.
	I could blank all this out.
	Alright.
	What'd he say?
	It's not for guys.
	Not for a price.
	See, this is why I don't like censoring art.
	Or even criticizing it.
	Maybe it's a lampoon.
	Of people who want James Bond to be a girl.
	You know what I mean?
	Like that movie that came out, The Manor, The Hunt, where rich people decide they want to hunt deplorables.
	That movie got killed because Trump fans thought it was insulting to them that people would want to hunt them.
	No, I think it was awesome.
	I think it's a great way to expose the left for how cruel and sadistic they are.
	That they probably would want to hunt and kill us.
	So the righties can watch that movie and go, see what sickos they are?
	And then the lefties can watch and go, ooh, I would love it if we could hunt them.
	Both sides are happy.
	That's what's great about art.
	It's open to interpretation.
	But it got shut down.
	We've got five more calls, if you're... Oh, Jesus Christ.
	They're not... It's kind of anticlimactic, too, for the show.
	You're watching a show, and then it just sort of... We've got to watch that viral video at the end, perhaps?
	No, we're not doing that.
	Okay.
	John.
	What's up, John?
	Hey, what's up, guys?
	Hey, Chad.
	Hey, so I saw on Reddit not too long ago an old post that Gavin had posted, or somebody posted on his behalf, saying that he used Rayzac hair cream in his hair, and I wanted to know if that's true.
	That is unequivocally, beyond a shadow of a doubt, true.
	I have to go, I bought it online now, but when I first started using it, I'd have to go to Black Neighborhoods to find it.
	R-A-Z-A-C.
	I highly recommend it.
	I've tried bro cream in the past, the normal, like, greaser stuff, and it just doesn't hold.
	I have a ju-fro when I let this go, and it's just incredibly strong.
	I notice when I hang out with black guys, they go, You smell like my aunt.
	You're reminding me of my mom.
	And I go, that's because I got my weave on.
	It's for black women to control their perms.
	And when black people get perms, it means they straighten their hair.
	I am very happy with this product.
	I'll give them a free plug right now.
	It may be gay, I don't know, to use black women's finishing cream, but it works for me.
	It's Rezac Perfect, too, because there's other different types.
	Rezac Perfect.
	Hey, Gary Busey hunting black guy in Worth on the screen.
	I heard about this clip.
	Hey, what's up, guys?
	Hey, man.
	I just wanted to say you should look up Surviving the Game on YouTube and start it at 30 seconds.
	It's Gary Busey hunting a black guy in the woods.
	So you want to talk about, you know, politically incorrect.
	Check that out.
	Surviving the game started.
	Okay.
	Thank you very much for your call.
	We will check that out.
	What I was saying is people from people from northern states should not have an opinion on the border.
	It should be the four southern states that border Mexico whose opinions matter.
	Thank you.
	I think open borders affect us all.
	They affect the entire economy.
	Yes, you're more affected when you're in southern borders, but we're all in this together, folks.
	We care about you.
	Can't you let us help?
	And we have the same opinion as you.
	All right, let's see the clip he's talking about.
	Okay.
	Why would you skip the clip?
	And we should end with that viral video.
	Gives them a reason.
	So it's a fictional show with Gary Busey, or he's literally hunting a black guy.
	Remember Shoot the Freak in Coney Island?
	No, no, no.
	There's a black dude wearing this big suit and you'd shoot him with paintball guns.
	It goes way, way back to 2014.
	And there'd be a guy going, hey, welcome to Shoot the Freak.
	For the young people, it's something they always wanted to try.
	For the people my age, it's something that they thought they did, they didn't do.
	And then for the old timers, maybe it's something that they did, and they want to try it again.
	That's crazy.
	That's an actual quote from the guy, the hype man at Shoot the Freak.
	Is that iced tea?
	- Yeah. - Sick mother fuckers. - Is this like a Jeffrey Dahmer thing?
	So it's Gary Busey hunting Ice-T.
	Doesn't matter if he's black.
	The victim in a story can be black.
	Yeah, he caught Asian people too.
	There's an Asian with a Fu Manchu.
	I think he's trying to get one of every race or something.
	Yeah, this isn't racist.
	What the fuck?
	It'd be racist to not have the guy be black.
	I might have the wrong trailer, but there's a lot of little clips from this.
	Anyway, that's a waste of time.
	Next call.
	Let's wrap it up, man.
	I'm fuckin' beat.
	Gavin, you said you quit being a vegetarian because one article saying that meat had less death on its hands than eating vegetables.
	That's because vegetables are gathered with threshers.
	95% of beef in America is grain fed from the same damn threshers.
	They kill exactly the same amount of animals.
	But it takes five times as much grain to have a hamburger than it does to just eat the grain or the vegetables or whatever it is.
	It's just an Alias scam to keep people from eating more morally.
	Just American consumption of beef alone, if you want to eat grass-fed, would have to graze on every piece of usable land in North and South America combined.
	Now, I mean, my car hits bugs, I eat rice, I eat the same bullshit that uses the freshers, but just admit that it wasn't a moral reason why you quit being a vegetarian, you just wanted to have a cheeseburger, brother.
	All right, thanks for calling.
	The article was called An Animal's Place by Michael Pollan.
	P-O-L-L-A-N.
	It's kind of hard to find.
	An Animal's Place.
	And you should read the whole thing before you give me shit for giving up on 15 years of vegetarianism.
	In it, by the way, speaking of all the grain you need to make beef, he talks about if we were just to go soy and avoid beef entirely, we don't have the room for it.
	We don't have the room.
	And he also talked about the incredible amount of animals that would get killed in this perfect utopia of all the birds getting swallowed up in the wheat combines and all that shit.
	I also thought, I'm sitting here just eating like tofu bacon.
	So it's tofu sprayed with some sort of flavoring to make it taste like bacon, which is what dog food is.
	So I'm sitting here like a dog, eating dog food.
	And he also talked about farm-to-table type stuff, like these small farms.
	Neiman Ranch, N-I-M-A-N, Neiman Ranch here in New York.
	They just kill an old cow and it has a pretty good life.
	And it's a small farm and they eat it up.
	And that's, I understand like mass production of meat can get both ecologically and morally tricky.
	But as far as small farms go, it's better than being a vegetarian.
	So the reason you list their color, it's just one of many reasons I gave up on being a vegetarian.
	And by the way, I'm a fucking dwarf.
	I'm 5'11, my brother's a giant, my dad's a giant, every Scottish relative I have hangs over me like I'm a fucking ball boy at the NBA.
	And I can't help but think it's because I was eating fucking processed tofu from 14 to 30.
	We got Mario from California.
	And by the way, you're not a shrimp.
	Because you're only a shrimp compared to other people, but you don't compare yourself to other people.
	In God's eyes, you're a legal dwarf.
	I'm not comparing myself to you.
	You have to buy your pants from Oshkosh Bogosh.
	You are a perfect creature.
	In comparison to nobody, you are exactly the statue you're supposed to be.
	I should be 6'1".
	God made you the way you are.
	Accept it.
	Frankly.
	And I should have pipes that are more reasonable than this.
	Your pipes are perfect.
	Perfect pipes.
	Great pipes.
	Terrible pipes.
	Mario from California.
	Mario!
	This is the last call.
	What's up, Mario?
	Hey, what's up, G-Dog?
	Just calling about if you're going to see the new Rambo this weekend, and if you've seen any of these reviewers on Rotten Tomatoes crying about Trump-era Rambo and shit, it's pretty fucking hilarious.
	Yeah.
	Has Rambo changed?
	It's the same fucking guy, the same character.
	There's zero depth there.
	There's not that much politics in Rambo.
	He's just a Vietnam vet who wants to be left the fuck alone.
	You drew first blood.
	You started it.
	And yes, of course, I'm going to see it.
	It includes the words, get off my lawn.
	Oh yeah.
	That's right.
	Why are you messing with me?
	I live in the middle of nowhere, I'm minding my own business, and you just had to fuck with me, didn't you?
	Oh, I just love that.
	There's nothing better in a movie than those grenades you step on.
	Yeah.
	Every time I watch that I think, isn't there a way?
	Couldn't you get like a piece of steel in your boot maybe?
	Take your boot off and put an I-beam on your boot or something?
	I wouldn't just like, often in the movies they go, run, run, oh well.
	The Claymores, yeah.
	I'd be sitting there cutting the sole of my boot off.
	I would do, help!
	Get me some rocks!
	Alright, that's enough calls.
	I'm out of steam.
	But we have to end with a final video and we end every show with a viral video.
	This is a video where a man gets a flare put in his neck and it's just a little too effective.
	There's something fishy going on here.
	Let's go through it together.
	You can tell me if I'm wrong.
	Is there audio?
	do you?
	Fire!
	This is going to screw up on YouTube, too.
	Look.
	Okay, so he's messing with some car.
	It's a road rage thing.
	It's kind of weird that he pulled over so far.
	Like, road rage is usually a little more intimate than that.
	But after watching this 350,000 times, I can't help but notice that they seem to be laughing.
	Look, she's smiling.
	See if you can freeze it on her when she leaves.
	And why is she running away from her boyfriend who is on fire?
	Oh well.
	And he, look, doesn't she seem to be smiling?
	I see what you're saying, but... He seems to be smiling too.
	But that, how can that not hurt?
	Because if it, it's about, yeah.
	Look at that.
	It looks like, kind of like terror.
	And then it's all blood right on the neck, right?
	I don't see any blood.
	That's blood on his shirt.
	No, he's got a red shirt on.
	You know what's weird though?
	When he walks away, his balls are lit up.
	Implying that it's shooting flares down his shirt into his track pants.
	Another reason not to wear fucking track pants.
	Wait, not red.
	Not red.
	And that's a pullover hoodie.
	Look, look, look at his butt cheeks!
	His butt cheeks?
	Yeah, they're lit up.
	Oh, right, right, right.
	Oh, no, wait, that's from the headlight, no?
	Oh, shit.
	Yeah, you're right.
	Wait, wait, wait.
	Yeah, she's got- it's a blinker.
	Dude, a flare isn't gonna rip open your entire chest and give you a sucking chest wound.
	But it's stuck in his neck.
	How is it not- The reason it's stuck- no, I agree that's his shirt.
	Oh, shit.
	You mean like he got shot in the neck with a flare and it's stuck in his jugular vein?
	Yeah, because why else would it be stuck?
	You know?
	How else would it get stuck without?
	I thought it was like a road flare that they stuck into his shirt.
	But it shot at him though.
	Holy shit, are we watching a snuff video?
	I believe that's death.
	Because, I mean, look, it shoots out of the fucking gun.
	Wait, go back to the beginning.
	Unless he, did he put it at him?
	Or did he shoot it?
	Put it at him?
	Did he place it upon him?
	Okay, get me out of the shot.
	Okay.
	It happens way too quick to tell.
	Holy crap!
	Because if it was just in your shirt, you could just take it off.
	Oh wait, no, he's zipping, he's unzipping.
	That's him unzipping, so it's not blood.
	That's him unzipping.
	Yeah, I knew it wasn't blood.
	Okay, I thought it was a lot of blood.
	Now, she's laughing.
	I don't know, dude.
	He looks like he's laughing right there, too.
	Yeah, this is a joke.
	But it also could be like, ah, like screaming, like panicking.
	Well, we'll leave it to the folks at home to tell us if that's fake or not.
	That's a wrap.
	We'd like to thank our sponsors, BlueChew.com, BetTSI, and Johnny Appleseed, J-A-B-C-D.
	Did I get that correct?
	Don't say the sponsors.
	J-A-C-B-D, doy.
	Johnny Appleseed CBD.
	J-A-C-B-D dot com.
	Tomorrow night we're going to air the premiere of Joe Biggs' new show called Biggs.
	Also, we'll have Joe Biggs and Roland Martin hanging out.
	That'll be an episode of Free Speech the Show.
	That's two different shows now, Biggs and Free Speech, where we have a conservative and a liberal see what they have in common and what they don't have in common.
	That's the fancy one I shoot in the bar.
	And then we'll see you back on Monday.
	Maybe you should shoot another Ryan's Mailbag.
	Have you shot another episode of that?
	Nope, there's just one episode.
	Okay, well you should shoot a better episode of that.
	I will do.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.

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