All Episodes
Aug. 20, 2018 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
37:36
Ep 172 | Diss is Nuts | Get Off My Lawn
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Oh, live from New York.
It's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGuinness.
What's all on a nigga's mind?
Working at dawn time.
It's so cold in the deep.
How the f do we supposed to keep peace?
What's all on in?
We're supposed to what?
Keep peace.
It's too cold to keep peace?
Something like that.
Why do you gang members keep killing each other?
uh...
'cause we're freezing go out a little for your homies Wait, I want to keep watching that.
You're not good at this.
This is terrible.
Again, this can't be the free market supporting this vocalist.
I suspect other means of income.
I think it's brilliant if you start a printing store in the hood, they always print stuff of dead folks.
And I would just be a millionaire.
That's one thing I can't get used to in the hood.
I live in the hood now.
I live in Harlem.
When they go to a funeral, they all have like ripped jeans on and a scarface t-shirt or something.
Someone's dead.
Put a suit on.
They're all carrying the casket in Yankees tees and stuff.
Yeah.
He would have liked it this way though.
Okay.
We got a fun show for you.
I'm going to devote almost this entire show to this video about being a visible minority in the workforce and how horrible it is.
Because people say things like, where are you from?
Detroit.
No, where are you from?
If you're Asian.
And I think it's a great example of how spoiled we are as a society.
Because now in 2018, when people complain, it's like someone asked me where I'm from.
Or I'm black and someone bought me fried chicken, assuming I'd like it.
Now, I happen to have really enjoyed it, but how did you know that I would like it?
All these microaggressions.
Michael Shea has a bit about that where he goes, someone's racist if they offer me fried chicken and watermelon.
That's a really nice racist.
And that's where we're at now.
Nice racists.
You're a race, Ryan.
I'm two different ones, yeah.
What's that like?
I feel like non-racial.
Like I've been on mushrooms before.
Can I say that?
Yeah.
My experience with Puerto Ricans is they're always cold.
Oh, my God.
Kind of cold in the D. So in July, they'll have like a windbreaker on in a hat.
Yeah, and when you get hot, you get real hot.
But I mean, usually I'm cold.
You're right.
My knees get very cold very quick.
That's what it's like to be Puerto Rican.
Yeah, your knees are just.
And what about any of those Japanese smart points?
Are you smart at all?
Well, I think, yeah, I have what.
No, but I have a lot of the...
I respect my elders, and I'll be weird.
You respect your elders.
Yeah, I'm kind of like you, too.
My mom was a hot chick, a blown bimbo.
Same.
She's smart now, but when my dad married her and she was making me, she was just like a hot chick.
He got the modest girl because he was the tough guy.
And he's smart.
So I'm half smart, half bimbo.
Half hot.
And you're half Japanese, half Puerto Rican.
You're probably similar.
Yeah, my mom was kind of a hottie.
Well, your dad was a hottie, though.
Yeah, he pulled in the Puerto Rican.
Ryan's dad was a Japanese hairdresser.
Still is.
I'm getting my hair cut for this show because you hate it so much when I go to visit him.
Do you know how much sex straight hairdressers get?
Probably a lot.
Infinity.
Yeah.
In fact, they don't like it.
They'd like a break.
Yeah.
I saw this graffiti in Israel and it said, my d ⁇ is broken.
What's the Tinder?
My d is broken, Tinder.
I want love.
In Tel Aviv, there's so much sex going on that men are crying because they don't want it anymore.
It's too much.
That's pretty cool.
And in Israel, apparently, my is broken is sort of like another way of saying I've had enough.
It's like an old phrase.
But yeah, those guys get too laid, poor kids.
All right, what do we got on the show today?
Yeah, that's all we have.
No guests, no nothing.
But before we get to that, I thought I would bring up some funny things.
Like this Obama.
This is from ages ago, but it's been bothering me ever since.
Man, getting on my nerves lately.
Man, what the you mean 3.5 billion people are annoying you recently?
What is he talking about?
Actually, part of me, I'm so vain that part of me thinks he's talking about proud boys.
Because one of the reasons people hate our group is that the ethos of the left forever has been, look, I know you're a white male.
Just apologize.
Just say I'm an American or a Western male.
Just say, look, I had slavery.
I killed all the Indians.
I'm a horrible person.
I live in this big champagne bath of privilege.
And I feel terrible about it.
And I want to fix it.
And I'm so sorry.
And I suck.
And that's been sort of accepted.
It's like, all right, you screwed up, but we'll forgive you.
And then we come along and go, nah, no, none of that is true.
And I don't feel bad at all.
In fact, I'm kind of jazzed about all the awesome stuff we've done.
I'm kind of jazzed.
If you want to bring up slavery, I'm kind of jazzed we ended it.
You call me a Nazi?
No, my guys killed the Nazis.
So I'm pretty impressed with everything we've made.
Like this beer can, like this aluminum, like the refrigeration that does it, like the AC that's keeping this beer from getting too hot.
The Carrier brothers in America invented air conditioning.
And just air conditioning alone, people should be screaming, oh, you look like the dudes that invented air conditioning.
Thank you.
I feel like I should be walking down the street going, I know, that wasn't me, but they did look like me.
Thank you.
It's so normal in my office.
It's like 70 degrees and I can work all summer and be fine.
Okay, I have to get home.
Will you take it easy?
You're just so awesome and all the stuff you made and the Industrial Revolution and separating church and state and Christianity.
You rock.
Okay.
Thank you, God.
And I love your MAGA hat.
I love that you support the president because he's like the most anti-government president we've ever had and the economy is moving.
Okay.
So many compliments.
It's like being catcalled for my Western accomplishments.
But no, no, you just get, you're evil.
You're a man.
Men are getting on my nerves recently.
I think he did this in Africa.
And he said, we need more women.
You know, there are a lot of women in politics and in the government in Africa, especially in the Congo, mostly because the men were dead.
The Hutsis and the Tutsis and the Zulus and the Wulu massacred each other.
So yeah, there's a disproportionate number of women getting involved because men are dead in giant, horrible mass graves.
Have you found it yet?
I'm kind of stalling for you.
I'm on my nerves lately.
Don't you hate his voice?
In particular, by the way, I want you to get more involved because...
What does that mean?
Involved in what?
Action movies, economics, math?
Get more involved.
I guess he means politics.
He wants more female politicians.
Aren't we drowning in female politicians?
They're everywhere.
And they suck.
Every time you see a problem like Benghazi, you go look it up and you see Charlene Lamb and Hillary Clinton and all these women wrecking it.
I think politics is a man's game because it's about conflict and deciding, I guess we're going to have to have a thousand young men die over there.
It's the lesser two evils.
Most women would go, I don't want to do any of that.
I don't want to kill children.
And you go, sometimes kids got to die.
Like World War II.
Take it away, Barak.
Men have been getting on my nerves lately.
I mean, I just, every day I read the newspaper.
What's going on with his arm?
Brothers, what's wrong with you guys?
I mean, what's wrong with us?
All right.
I mean, we're violent.
We're bullying.
Just pause.
And by the way, when you pause, don't go full screen me.
Leave me short.
What the hell is he talking about?
And what is wrong with bullying?
And what's wrong with violence?
Is he saying that we just go and shoot people in the head?
I mean, some people do.
MS-13 usually.
But is he saying that we just like can't wait to brawl in every bar?
I don't understand him.
I think these guys, they get to this level with platitudes where they just open their mouth and they say things like, we want you to be the most yourself you can be and never get othered.
And you're like, I understand the sentiment there.
It doesn't mean anything here on earth.
You're just saying a bunch of nice words.
Bullies are bad?
Yeah, got it.
I've seen Pee Wee Herman.
I'm familiar with the concept that bullies are bad.
We're violent.
Men, half the population is violent.
What are you talking about?
I like the mosaic in the background, though.
Keep going.
You know, just not handling our violence.
What does that mean?
So I think empowering more women on the continent right away is going to, I think, lead to some better policies.
This means nothing.
All right, that's enough.
Imagine you were a high school teacher and someone submitted that as an essay.
You'd go, this is garbage.
You haven't said anything.
What are you talking about?
Men are bullying?
Men are violent.
Women should get involved.
We'll be in better places.
I don't understand you, Barack.
I don't understand you, Barack.
Hello.
I often say racism doesn't exist.
Someone contradicts that by showing me a picture of the Klan, of which there are an infinitesimally small number of people.
And what they do, by the way, to thwart that is they just expand the definition of Klan and they throw Klan hoods on SCOTUS and say everyone's a white supremacist there.
See?
Now there's lots of them.
It's everyone who voted for Trump.
Racism is when you see someone's color or their race and you don't give them a chance.
You say that person must be like that.
There's no exceptions.
You can recognize patterns.
Everyone should recognize patterns.
But when you apply that pattern to an individual without giving them the chance to be the exception to the rule, you are a racist.
And that happens so incredibly rarely, it's irrelevant.
For every time you can show me the N-word, I'll show you someone being racist against a white person.
Yes, people notice when you're Asian or Indian, those two groups, those two ethnic groups are much more successful than whites.
So stop trying to tell me that racism is a thing just because a lot of black people are in prison.
That's not proof that racism exists.
I think there's a lot of black people in prison because welfare shattered the black family and you got all these fatherless kids getting up to no good with idle hands.
It's not a matter of some evil white man going, let's put the Negroes in jail.
So here is a video of what it's like to be at work when you're a person of color.
And I firmly believe it's a great example of how totally irrelevant racism is.
If these are your problems, then you don't have problems.
All right, what if we treated white coworkers the way we treat minority coworkers?
So just already right there, you are talking about Asians, Indians, and blacks, basically.
Two of those groups make way more money than your average white person.
Already this argument is crap, but go ahead.
And Hispanics.
I feel like feathers.
So limp.
Where are you from?
Stop.
So you got that first one?
It is, people touch my black hair.
All right?
You would have to be the biggest yokel, rural hick old lady to go up to a black person at Work and touch their hair.
All right?
And I'm sure it's happened.
In fact, it was good luck in the 50s to rub a little black kid's head.
That's not the end of the world.
Hey, in the early 90s, I was a dork environmentalist.
I had dreadlocks.
People touch them all the time.
It's this annoying.
It's not a big deal.
If you had a mustache that went out like that, people would want to touch it.
People are curious.
It's not an invasion of your privacy.
Well, it sort of is.
It's not a big invasion of your privacy.
And this whole like, ew, it feels limp.
No one does that.
The very, very few people who touch a black person's hair never go, eh, it feels gross.
It feels like steel wool.
It feels nappy.
I'm not a fan.
Inevitably, it's a silly, naive old lady doing it.
And right after, it's a compliment and it's exciting and I love you and you're exotic, whatever.
It's not treating you as an equal.
It is fetishizing you a little bit.
Big fucking deal.
Now, the next one we stepped on a little bit and it's some weird Asian homosexual pretending to be a white guy saying, where are you from?
Dude, this is the whole point of this whole video.
This is what annoys me with this whole video.
Asians are maybe 5% of the population.
Blacks are 14% of the population.
So people are curious about you when you don't represent a large portion of their life.
You know who else goes through this?
Very tall people.
6'6 people always get asked, do you play basketball?
How tall are you?
It annoys the crap out of them.
And every time I'm with a very tall person, I chastise the person asking them boring questions.
Albinos get boring questions.
People who are ethnically ambiguous, who are like half Spanish, half Asian, so they're like brown with Asian eyes.
They get asked that question.
I say a boot instead of about.
People always ask me, what are you, Canadian?
In fact, because I'm a white guy, it's easy to do.
It's fun to do.
People go, whatever, dude, aren't you Canadian?
You can have all the fun you want with the Canadians.
And by the way, I could not care less.
I was talking to Anthony Cumia about Saturday Night Fever and I go, the way Italians are portrayed in that movie is downright racist.
And he goes, I could not care less.
Yes, you're right.
And I think it's hilarious.
Imagine being antagonized by someone saying, where are you from?
And when they actually mean, what is your ethnic background?
I ask people their ethnic background all the time.
I want to know German, Irish, within whites.
I always want to know your ethnic background.
It says a lot.
It says if you can handle your booze, for example.
Go ahead.
Where are you from?
Philadelphia.
No, no, you know what I mean.
Like, where are you really, really from?
By the way, this has become a common joke with the left.
Like in Cobra Kai, they say the Ralph Macchio character says to the boyfriend, where are you from?
His daughter's boyfriend.
And he goes, Riverside.
And the guy goes, yeah.
Look, I know you were born here.
I'm sure your parents might have been born here.
We obviously mean, are you Chinese?
Are you Japanese?
Are you Korean?
No one's trying to decide what ship to send you on when we send you back home.
Korea and Japan and China have totally different cultures.
And I guarantee you, even if you're third generation Japanese, some of that Japanese culture affects your life.
You hang out with your grandparents.
It's a relevant question.
My Scottish heritage is all over my life.
My predilection for booze, my bad temper, my cheapness, my whole, you just made an enemy for life.
That's in my DNA.
It's worth asking about.
Go ahead.
Italy?
Get the f out.
I told you it wasn't Caucasia.
What's the deal with pomp spice?
What's the matter with that?
What's the matter with saying that?
That you thought the guy was Japanese, but he's Korean and the other guy was right.
Big, this is antagonism.
This is hell for you.
This is being lynched.
This is a life where there's segregated water fountains, where you can't get an education, where you literally have different rights.
This is not racism.
This is a slightly annoying and socially awkward co-worker.
And there's plenty of ways, by the way, to ask that question that isn't annoying.
I do it all the time, and I'm not annoying.
What's the deal with pumpkin spice lattes?
Okay, pause.
So that is, I guess, the equivalent of saying, what's the deal with grape juice?
Lower middle class, poor blacks, from lower middle class down, tend to have a disproportionate joy when it comes to grape juice.
That's a valid question.
I wouldn't ask it to a middle class or upper middle class or city water.
Poor black kids like to drink water with about seven tablespoons of sugar in it, which is the same amount of sugar as Coca-Cola.
It sounds disgusting, but I tried it.
It's actually really good.
What's with city water?
This is someone expressing a genuine curiosity about your culture, which they're slightly uncouth, I guess, but these are all microaggressions.
And what's the first part of the word microaggression?
Micro.
In other words, racism is this big.
What are you complaining about?
All right, so this one's a doozy.
Here's a black guy presenting something intelligent at work.
All right, who do we know that does hot yoga?
Oh no, that's not it.
David Ashley.
So you went to hot yoga.
First of all, the odds of a white person doing hot yoga are pretty high, especially in the ambitious workforce, especially white women in New York.
My wife does hot yoga, so he would have been correct if he said Gavin, Gavin's wife.
He would have got one of them right.
And black people have predilections for their own exercise, their own customs.
That's why we talk about black culture.
Why is there a gay parade if there's no such thing as things that gays tend to do, culture that gays tend to have?
In this day and age, black culture, gay culture is just anything that's good.
If it's bad, then you can't include it in the culture.
And as far as white culture goes, you can't even say those words.
White culture is evil.
In other words, if you want to find racism, look at the way people talk about whites.
And it's not this nice.
It's a lot harsher than do you do hot yoga.
It's white supremacy must die.
White people need to get to the back of the line.
Literally, at rallies, they'll be sent to the back of the crowd.
So you went to Harvard.
That's impressive.
Yeah, it is.
Did you go on a water polo scholarship?
La Crosse.
You're a legacy, right?
Yo.
Pause.
This is this is so she's asking a black guy if he went on a sports scholarship to a fancy school, right?
The anger here, if this happens, by the way, and big deal if it does.
And by the way, if it does, you better hope you weren't there on a sports scholarship because she got it right.
The real problem here is affirmative action.
You know, I've always said if you affirmative action black people into Harvard and Yale, then the black guy with the straight A's who deserves to be there is walking around knowing people are thinking he's an affirmative action hire.
So you've trivialized his accomplishments.
That's what I hate about affirmative action.
It makes the people who earn it less successful.
You've diluted their success.
And it's, by the way, it's the same with that whole, when I get on an elevator as a black man, I see women grab their purse.
And they don't do that with an Asian guy.
Yeah, because the women have noticed patterns and the odds of them being attacked by a black guy are higher than a Chinese guy.
So you know who you should be mad at?
Not her with the purse, not the system, but the black guys who created this statistic.
You should be mad at the black guys who stole purses and created that.
Or when you have mag rims, some fancy rims, and you're driving through a neighborhood and you get pulled over by the cops.
Get mad at the drug dealers that created this pattern that the cops inevitably noticed.
Don't get mad at people for noticing patterns.
Get mad at the people who generated the pattern in the first place.
Cross your legacy, right?
Yo, what's a Wayne Gretzky?
Pause.
So this woman is curious about a prominent figure in this person's community.
Who's Marcus Garvey?
What was all that about?
Wasn't he just saying blacks should go back to Africa?
Isn't that kind of racist?
I would never say that to a black person because of the culture we live in, but I think it's an interesting question, and I think it's an interesting topic of discussion.
But you're not allowed to have topics of discussion at work.
In fact, I would argue that the modern workplace has made black people into pariahs.
I guarantee you, if you're in the lunchroom and you're all sitting by the vending machine eating your stupid snacks and your microwave chickpeas and a black woman walks in, the jokes just go, And here's the thing.
What if that black woman is super funny and likes to riff?
You just ruined her fun.
You just made her into the elephant man with your stupid lawsuits and your culture of fear in the workplace.
They've done it to women in general, too.
We have these few Me Too women that say, like the New York Mets story, where she recorded a conversation, a private conversation, where two other guys were riffing, doing imitations of other people.
One of them said the word pussy.
She sent it to her boss and two major Mets spokesman guys, broadcasters, sportscasters, dudes, were fired.
So now everyone who works for the Mets is going to be petrified of women.
Now, if a woman shows up and she's funny and likes to riff and do imitations that may or may not include the word pussy, no one's going to want to do it with her.
They're going to want to avoid her like the plague.
And you know what else I'm seeing happen, by the way?
This is a little bit of a tangent because it's about women.
But I'm seeing guys secretly, never on the books, say, yeah, just don't hire women.
It's not worth the risk.
You're just begging for a lawsuit.
Find the most qualified guy.
So this need to enforce equality is actually sending us back in time and making us more sexist and likely more racist even.
Dame, Ashley, Ashley, Dame.
Oh, this one drives me together now?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
Because I was thinking you guys would like to hit it off.
You know what I mean?
Because you're both white.
Baz.
No one has ever done that in the history of civilization.
No one, especially in 2018, would dare go up to two black people and say, hey, so you two, huh?
I would do it as a joke because I don't care about getting fired and I don't care about HR.
But no one goes up to two black people, not kidding, and says, whoa, African American, African-American.
You guys are probably going to get together, right?
Make little African-American babies.
Obviously, because you're both black.
What do you complain?
And this has never happened, but if it did, that's racism for you.
That's the horrible life you lead.
That's the suffering you must endure.
God, these pants look ridiculous.
I wear these pants in every video, and I have so much stuff in my pockets.
They make me look like a horse, like a mountie.
It's hard to find good pants these days, don't you think?
All right, go ahead.
And that's how I think we can improve next year.
This is what I was talking about earlier.
Black guys did a good seminar.
This is why affirmative action works, people.
All they need is an opportunity.
Pause.
If a white guy said that after a black guy did a good presentation, he would be so fired.
He would be thrown out of that workplace on his ass so fast.
Do you have any clue how much trouble that guy would get in?
You're fired.
You're done.
Hey, everyone.
This is why we needed to hire this guy because black people are capable of smart stuff.
You would, first of all, you'd have to be 90 years old to be that naive.
But even that 90-year-old would be done.
Donzel washing done.
Yeah.
And to be honest, you were pretty well spoken.
You were super articulate.
This is a pet peeve of mine, too.
A lot of black people in America, we have a segregation in this country, but it's voluntary segregation.
And black and white people tend to choose to be separate.
We're seeing this in college recently where blacks are saying, I want a separate graduation.
They are telling white people they have to go home on certain days.
There's even with the black and Hispanic tension in Southern California, on May Day, they're saying black people shouldn't even come to school because there's going to be a riot.
God forbid you wear A USA t-shirt on May Day.
That's begging for a fight.
So we have segregation here, but it's voluntary.
And I think a lot of it has to do with the left.
And because of that segregation, it's so intense that black people in America tend to have a different accent.
That's why when black people talk like me, they say, oh, you're the whitest black guy I've ever met, which bugs the crap out of me.
I hate when people say that.
Sometimes on the phone, if I'm talking to someone from the Bronx or East New York or the South, black people, I have trouble understanding them.
The Ebonic dialect is getting more and more distant from normal English.
So when a black guy talks like this, you notice it.
You mention it.
And by the way, it's good to have good diction and not speak in Aave African-American vernacular English.
In fact, there's a movie about it right now where a black guy has somehow managed to speak with David Cross's voice.
He has a middle-class Jewish guy's voice, and his life starts being successful.
So it is a thing when black people don't sound like black people.
It is unusual.
And someone dared to point it out.
Kick your ass.
What's the deal with this whole eat prey love thing?
It's tough out here for you.
Pause.
So someone noticed that black people tend to read a book.
Now, white people, white men don't read eat prey love.
Every white woman has read it.
I think my wife's read it.
It's a stupid book about some dumb bitch who abandoned her family to go find herself in India and go screw a bunch of dudes who she ended up marrying some Indian guy who ended up dumping her as soon as he got citizenship, I believe.
So it's an irritating book.
It's like Sex in the City.
It's like, ruin your life, become a feminist, let your ovaries dry up, don't be a mom.
And it's super empowering.
But it's worth asking white women, what the hell is with that book?
In fact, I would ask white women, what's that book?
I don't know what the black equivalent is of that book.
I don't really care.
But if I did, I think it's a totally valid question to ask a black person because the odds are pretty good they're familiar with it.
It's tough out here for your kind of people.
Come here.
Never happened ever.
Stops.
Now, I'm not going to fault these people for adding something for comedic effect.
You're trying to make an amusing video, right?
No white person has ever said it's tough out there for your people at work in any kind of major metropolis and hug them.
Now, someone with Down syndrome may have done that.
A 98-year-old woman who's suffering from dementia might have done that.
That's, and by the way, this is a nightmare for you.
Someone appreciating your suffering, which you won't shut up about, and hugging you, that's an aggression.
That's racism.
That's a horrible place to be.
It's like that comedian, what was it, Michael Shea, when he said to offer black people fried chicken or watermelon is racist.
And he goes, well, that's a pretty nice racist.
This is a pretty nice racist.
And look at the lips on the ear.
And what's the deal with casseroles?
You can't put casseroles in everything.
Everything's not a casserole.
Have you seen this?
If someone said that about collared greens or chitlins or some other black soul food that I'm not familiar with, they're obviously not coming at you with aggression.
They're saying, you can't put collared greens in everything.
That's the way jokey people talk.
It's called busting someone's balls a little bit.
I do it all the time and it gets done to me all the time.
People make fun of my looks.
My friends make fun of my looks.
My friends make fun of the way I talk.
My friends make fun of my heritage.
They make fun of Canada.
They make fun of Scotland.
They make fun of England.
Native Americans won't shut up joking about the other tribe and how I've got nothing to do with that tribe, ribbing each other all the time.
You go to a powwow and half the t-shirts say FBI, flat butt Indian.
They're making fun of the fact that they tend not to have an ass like Asian people.
That's called funny.
And what you're doing here with all these rules about how you can't talk about casseroles or black food, what you're doing there really is you're trying to kill jokes.
You're trying to kill riffing.
And that's ironic because it's in a comedy video.
So you're policing comedy while trying to make people laugh.
I'm not laughing.
I'm annoyed.
Asserol.
Have you seen her spite in front of Old Navy?
White on white crime is out of control.
Pause.
White on white crime is actually not out of control, but black on black crime is out of control.
Are you familiar with the south side of Chicago?
It's a major problem.
And black people and liberals are very happy to talk about the half dozen blacks that are unjustly shot by cops and to try to turn it into hundreds, if not thousands of blacks being hunted down by cops or sport.
They're happy to talk about that non-existent phenomenon, but the real phenomenon of, I can't remember the data now, but what wasn't it like 20 blacks a day?
Yeah, I think it's 20 blacks a day are murdered or some sort of homicide.
And about 18 of those are by other black people.
That's pretty relevant.
That is a self-imposed self-genocide.
I think it's an interesting topic.
It's a little bit heavy, but there is a strange phenomenon with black violence.
And these fights you see at Walmart, these fights you see at Chuck E. Cheese, you don't really see that with white people.
You might have a brawl at some Lullapalooza thing by the Porta-Potties, but it's not as common as the hundreds of videos from Chuck E. Cheese, from Walmart, from a Bodega.
What is that about?
That's a curious phenomenon.
Anthony Cumia got fired for bringing it up, but it's definitely a thing.
It's definitely worth discussing.
Have you noticed, by the way, they hate discussing actual patterns and they love discussing non-existent patterns.
Is that because someone is trying to purport some sort of myth?
This is what propagandists do.
They airbrush out the truth and then airbrush in a lie.
Exactly why the church needs to be involved.
Yeah, you're right.
Does nobody say Hi in this office.
Yes, everyone says hi.
What you're doing is you're policing the other speech that you have decided is racist.
And this wake-up call was meant to show white people how horrible it is to be black in America at work.
But all it showed me, and likely you, was that this whole concept of racism is a bunch of whiners complaining about microaggressions.
And the word microaggressions is remarkably apt.
I don't know if you've ever done meth for three weeks straight, but one of the side effects is you get grumpy.
There's ups and downs.
I think most people are sort of like this, but with meth, there's this for three days, then that for a day.
I think the recidivism for them getting clean is 99% because surviving a meth hangover is one of the most brutal things you can do.
So they just do more meth.
They keep putting it off.
And I think, I'm just making this up right now, but I would imagine you drink probably a bottle of vodka when you're on meth to sort of even it out.
Then you've had a bottle of vodka.
Like, I don't care how you slice it.
A bottle of vodka went into your body.
So the hangovers, when you are done your meth and recovering from the, I don't know, you're awake for three days.
Maybe you had two entire bottles of vodka.
That must be a real doozy.
Now, if you're married and you guys are doing this together in an abandoned house in rural Texas, then you guys are going to get up to some fights.
But the good news is you're both so weak from the abuse you've done to your body that no one really gets that hurt.
I'd like to play a clip.
By the way, I only assume these people are meth heads.
They might just be a couple who's down on their luck and are in a bad mood.
Look, the punches are fine.
Who's recording this?
F ⁇ you fucking manipulated blood.
When my kids fight, they do more damage to each other than these two.
*Bleep*!
*Bleep* with me!
You hear me?
You can't get out of that?
Who cannot get out of a woman's headlock?
What are you doing?
Oh, that was a weird move.
God damn, I hate your fucking gift ass bitch.
Their son is filming it.
Oh, wait.
He's not in withdrawals.
He's high.
She stole everything you got.
You don't got nothing, dude.
She stole all your paper plates.
It's at the end of the video.
Guys, I cannot stress this enough.
If you are in a relationship and you're doing meth and you're getting in a fight with your wife and you've both been high for four days and haven't slept and she comes at you and puts you in one of those headlocks, just look at her and say, get off my lawn.
Work it like the one time.
Bye.
Thank you.
I mean, 23 minutes.
How long was that intro?
Do you know?
That felt like 10.
No.
Dude, you got to time things.
I'm not looking for your gut instinct.
Okay.
By the way, Ryan, you got to bleep in post.
You got to bleep all swears.
But what I like to do with intro songs, I don't like to add a beep.
It's really distracting.
So you just cut the f ⁇ out.
Exactly.
So it's like, what the are you doing?
Sh ⁇ .
We'll talk about that later because I think it's funny that the things that can slip that are allowed are pretty cool.
Motherfuckers.
No shit.
And you could say d and fag?
Uh, no.
But I think I could say dick.
I can't say fag.
Okay.
You gotta beep out all the f ⁇ .
So a fag and whatever.
I mean, you know.
If there's a fag on my show, I'm in trouble.
Really?
Alright, I'll look for the episode.
The past five or six episodes, there's one.
You said your wife is a f ⁇ hag.
Or likes staying out with fucking fag hag.
Fag hag is different.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
I didn't know that.
It's almost like you could say ass, but not ass.
Yeah.
Okay.
Gotcha.
I mean, I'm cool with it all, but just looking up.
I got the video.
Thanks.
Not that Achie.
Hey, I don't mind, man.
Someone wants to show me their ass.
That's on them.
I'm totally good.
I got the video whenever you're ready, and we're rolling.
All right.
Now, I understand the notes.
It did look weird at first, but they're very...
He's a very bright man.
I've studied him for years.
And Joe Rogan's just like, wow, yeah, he's a bad motherfucker man.
Wow, that's crazy, man.
He's a bad motherfucker man.
I take these things before I do jiu-jitsu.
And Bass Ruthin, like, kick the guy in the face.
Export Selection