Andrew Schulz and Mark Normand dissect the Department of Government Efficiency, debating whether Elon Musk's radical cuts to bloated agencies represent necessary reform or dangerous authoritarian overreach reminiscent of Julius Caesar. They analyze the risks of AI-driven firings amidst corporate greed in oligopolies, contrasting current moves with Bill Clinton's era while addressing domestic terrorism manipulation and Steve Smith Sr.'s infidelity scandal. Ultimately, the hosts question if dismantling bureaucratic inertia justifies sacrificing institutional stability, concluding that public disillusionment drives these extreme measures despite fears of historical parallels to Hitler. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Celebrating New Special Launch00:08:44
Schultzy.
Schultze, Schultze, Schultze.
Matthew.
Hey, cute baby.
I didn't get the Amber Alert.
Hey, Matt, how are you?
Hey, Matt.
How are you?
It's always good to see you.
Good to see you, too, man.
What are you two up to today?
Ah, Jesus.
We are celebrating my new special's coming out.
Oh, nice.
Yeah.
What do you stand up there and grow a mustache?
Actually, if you want to know, it's about my wife and I trying to make a baby.
It's like Red Tube.
Like what?
Red Tube, man.
F ⁇ ing Red Tube, you know.
No, not like Red Tube.
What are you talking about?
Weirdo?
Oh, we had a lot of trouble getting pregnant.
Oh, oh, I'm sorry.
Thank you.
Appreciate that.
Well, you should have come to me for that.
Come to you for what?
Well, I know everything there is about being born, right?
You can use that in your skit if you want.
Matt, how the f ⁇ would I use that in my life?
So what was the issue like?
Are you like limp?
No, I'm not limp, okay?
I get pretty hard.
Oh, I believe you.
I do get pretty hard.
I believe you.
Do you want to know what the special's about or not?
Sure.
All right.
It's basically this.
The doctor puts the embryo to my wife.
The second he puts it in, I'm like, your sperm is like a sea clutch.
Blacked out.
Shame!
At this point, I realize she thinks I suck my dick!
Was that?
Did you just clip montage me?
Yeah.
You clip montage.
You asked me.
You want to battle with me?
You want a clip montage battle with me?
Four f ⁇ decades in the movie business.
You want to play this game with me?
No, you just said you wanted to know what else.
Why don't you get a little bit of the rights to the movies?
Oh, f ⁇ .
Yeah, we reached out and there was like a whole...
What kind of special is this?
Do me a favor.
Don't watch the special.
It's not for people like you.
What if I'm not going to do that?
I don't want people like me.
I'll watch your finger I'm shooting blanks comedy special as much as I want to.
I'll watch it twice.
As a matter of fact, where's it playing?
I don't want to tell you.
I just playing.
Netflix, okay?
But don't do that thing where you like embarrass me.
No, no, I would want to embarrass you.
Hey, everybody, everybody.
Listen, Andrew Schultz has a comedy special about how his balls are full of oatmeal, and we're all gonna watch it, okay?
Thanks.
You are so bossing.
It's amazing.
I'm watching it now.
I wasn't gonna watch it.
Now I am gonna watch it.
Okay.
When's it coming out?
I don't wanna tell you.
Tell me when it's coming out.
I'm not gonna tell you when it's coming out.
When the f ⁇ it's coming out.
March 4th, but you better not tell a single person, man.
I better not tell us and you can.
You better not tell us.
You don't tell me what I get to tell you.
Don't put my business on the streets, man.
What world do you live in, man?
We're in a diner in Chelsea.
Matt?
I will tell whoever I want to tell whenever I want.
You're not going to tell us.
Yeah, watch this.
Oh, Jesus.
Hey, everybody.
This dumbass right here has a special about his low sperm count, and it's on Netflix.
Wait, what's the date?
I forgot.
Just remember to dip shit.
March 4th.
March 4th on Netflix.
Bum bum.
You're welcome.
You feel better?
Mm-hmm.
So you got it all out?
That was a good promo.
Yeah, that was pretty good.
Is that the same baby from American Snipers?
Sorry, wait, wait, wait.
What's up, everybody?
Welcome to Flagrant.
If you already saw that, thank you very much for watching.
And again, I appreciate you.
Specials out March 4th on Netflix.
That's Tuesday, March 4th.
So next Tuesday.
Damn, already a week away.
Hell yeah.
Yeah, shout out Matt Damon, bro.
What was that like?
Your neighbor.
He's just a legend.
There's a funny take that we did not use, and I was like bullying Dove into doing it.
But, you know, the line where he gets up and he goes, Andrew Schultz has a special where his balls are made out of oatmeal.
So in the skit, Dove looks at the oatmeal and then he just puts it down.
Yo, you know, I'd be even funnier.
Andrew Schultz has a comedy special about how his balls are full of oatmeal now to get him to do that.
I we went through like 10 different takes.
Also, Dove is so adorable because like there's this moment for the cutaway and he's like it's like he's George cloney.
Like he is locked in.
He's coming up to me.
He goes, so what do you think my motivation is?
Am I nervous?
Am I anxious?
Am I like shocked about looking at you guys?
Doctor's actually such a good actor.
He's a really good actor.
He is annoying.
But you also, it's also understand.
It's like you're acting a piece with fucking the market.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But he's so he's coming.
It's like, what do you think it is?
And I was like, yeah, I think that, you know, you're eating oatmeal.
And somebody says, your balls are made.
Obviously, you're grossed out.
And he goes, okay, so I would look up, right?
And I'm like, well, I don't know if Matt Dame was at a diner and you were eating and he started giving a speech.
Would you look up?
He goes, yes, I probably would.
We did more tanks on Dove eating that oatmeal than me and Matt doing the entire thing.
It was an hour.
It was an hour.
How did you get into the character for that role?
What was your I went deep.
And I think what I locked in on, someone wrote in the comments, I'm, I guess, Middle Eastern River Monument.
No, no, but it was like we had a food decorator and it was like, oh, it doesn't plop.
Now you got to add milk to it, make it runny.
I went lefty.
So protect the face.
He went lefty.
I mean, he really put himself out of it.
You know how hard it is for Dove to do a scene where he doesn't eat food?
That's really difficult.
No, but shout out Matt Damon, man.
Shout out, Matt Damon.
Let's go, legends.
Absolutely.
I'm incredible.
I literally hit him up.
I should like see the text.
I'm basically asking him to say no in the text.
Yeah.
And like, I probably rewrote that text 40 different times.
Of course.
Right?
Because I don't want to be like too, was it presumptuous?
I can't assume you would say yes to doing this.
And I know you have a million different things.
Legends.
Shout out to Tori Lanez, bro.
Tori, we need you in a pod.
Yeah, you need that promo with Tori Lanez, bro.
Freestyle from Prison.
Did you hear like one of his songs got cut off by a fight that broke out?
No.
Like he was recording, I guess, through the phone.
That's in the background, like a riot hat.
Oh, that's fine.
The Tori's 5'3.
Yeah.
That's the first cheeks they're gone.
So, but no, I hit him up and I was like, dude, please say no to this.
You have way too many things to do to be busy about this, but I got a funny idea for a promo for the special.
If you're down, you let me know.
And he was like, he's like, yeah, could we do it like between eight and three?
That's when the kids are at school.
And I was like, yeah.
He goes, what day is good for you?
I go, what day is good for you?
Yeah, exactly.
Like before this, I hadn't really thought it was going to happen.
So I had a loose idea.
And the second he did it, it became even more anxiety and then I got to write something funny.
Yeah.
So I wrote this thing with a couple of guys.
Mark was definitely helping out.
Joey Avery's helping out Nessen.
And then immediately I was like, I cannot fuck this up.
So I hit up Neil, Neil Brennan.
And Neil was, Neil's fucking awesome.
Yeah, he's great.
Neil was awesome.
So Neil was really helpful.
And then he was like, hey, I got to go film the Odyssey Friday.
Do you think we could do Thursday?
Wow.
I was like, oh, you're going to go film Christopher Nolan that you're the star of?
Yeah, sure.
I think we could work on our schedule.
So you asked him the way that you actually did it in the sketch.
Pretty much.
Where you were like, yeah, you won't do this.
You probably don't have what it takes to do this role.
He's like, I'll fucking do it.
I'll be on Thursday.
That's what Neil found.
Neil was like, listen, if you tell a guy from Boston what to do, he will, or not to do something, he will do it just because that's the energy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And, but yeah, he said he was down to it.
And I got to give him credit for a lot of the funny too because when we were riffing in the trailer, which was a surreal moment to be riffing a scene.
Are you nervous in that moment?
Yeah, I wasn't nervous, but I had like an adrenaline dump afterwards.
Like afterwards, I just want to go to sleep.
Yeah.
But like I was in there with the director.
Shout out Melby.
Melby, Melby director.
Andrew, what's his name?
Is Andrew Melber Melbourne?
Melby.
Going by Melbourne.
That's Melby.
But yeah, we're just in the trailer.
And like, he's like, yo, it'd be kind of funny.
He would bring up these little lines.
He's like, it'd be kind of funny if when you're trying to explain about the limp, the joke thing, I do the dad joke.
He's like, what if I just like, what if I just realize I ask you something that doesn't make sense?
He's like, you can use that in your skit.
Yeah.
And then, and then I realize and I just talk right over.
Yeah.
And then like, what if you for say you don't know the date?
And I go, just remember to dip shit.
Like a lot of the funny is him.
I want to give him just remember to dip shit is so good.
It's great.
It's great.
Also, when do you get to see Matt Meme?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like that's when I pitched him.
I was like, dude, you're the best.
Everybody loves you in everything you do.
Yeah.
Well, I will say, I feel like some of his best roles, he is like a villain.
And that's when he's funny.
Yeah.
He's like a bad guy.
Oh, he likes the departed.
But he always plays the nice guy.
He's actually bad.
Interstellar saying that.
He's so likable that when he does the villain turn, you're like, what?
You're rooting for him.
Yeah.
Also, I didn't get the American Sniper thing.
Rearranging The IUD Bro00:11:43
Yeah.
And that didn't get it out.
It's so funny.
It's like comical.
So in American Sniper, they have this really dramatic scene where the main dude is like with his child, like arguing with his wife.
Rally Cooler.
And it became a whole thing, apparently.
I didn't know this.
It's like an internet meme because it's so obviously a fake baby.
It's hilarious.
And he's just like chatting with her.
Okay.
Look at the hand.
She's using his phone.
He's trying to make the hand move and shit.
It's so funny.
It does look exactly like your fake baby.
Yeah.
We had Shiloh there, and I was like, I'm not.
Yeah.
There's no way.
Well, one, I didn't want to put her in, obviously.
Yeah, no free clout.
No, you worked for this.
You know what I mean?
I got to give it to her for no reason.
Yeah, but also like her around breakfast food, we would not have a single taste.
Just fist in the oatmeal.
Dude, fucking going crazy.
I didn't realize that eggs were expensive until I had a daughter.
I didn't realize that fruit or blueberries or any of this shit.
Is your kid eating blueberries yet?
No, but he's grabbing shit.
He all of a sudden food became interesting to him recently.
We didn't know this.
So we just like sat down to eat and then just immediately cuffed just flying everywhere.
Fucking shit.
Food on the ground.
I think blueberries are like the size of a nipple.
Oh, interesting.
And I think, or my wife.
Yeah, you're giving a lot of weight.
GMO'd up.
This is a child having conversation.
You're like, yeah, blueberries are the size and color of a nipple.
You're like, whoa, whole color.
You got the dark Emma?
And Vietnamese titties?
This is something you'll realize.
They do get darker.
That's the true thing.
Yo, you know what's crazy?
I want to hear about you.
No, not my wife or his wife.
In general, are talking about.
I'm talking about women.
No, our wives' nipples are perfect pink colors.
100% totally perfect pink.
It's the most beautiful pink you've ever seen with no hair on it at all.
Exactly.
Hairs don't grow on them at all due to all the hormones in their body due to pregnancy.
Exactly.
Nipples wax.
I saw a hair on the shit and I was like, yo, we got to get rid of that.
My wife tried to hit me with, that's how the baby knows what a nipple is.
Well, all right.
Why isn't she going from my nose?
Scraggling so much.
Yeah, you'll come to find this out.
It helps the baby find the areola when it's darker.
That's what they say, so they don't got to yank them shits out of their titties.
I think you just put the shit in their mouth.
They go, oh no, that's what you think.
Just wait.
Anyway, you have some baby.
I like the Choicey baby.
Yo, now that Jess Leene is a super famous TikToker, is that going to push back baby?
Or is that going to make you guys keep blowing her up?
And at a certain point, she's going to need new content.
Wait, what?
You guys keep blowing her up.
Oh, we're blowing her up.
Yeah.
I thought you were leaving it in.
Yeah.
Come on.
We're talking about it.
Of course, I've been doing that since day one.
Oh, for real?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, do you guys do the goalie in?
Or yeah, she did.
Okay.
Now not, but I'm still, you know, not.
You know what I mean?
Wait, you're rearranging the IUD, bro?
No.
No, the IUD's intact.
It's not even that deep.
Have you ever felt it?
No.
Can you feel it?
She didn't have IUD.
Oh, she doesn't.
She was on, she was on the rearrangement.
You know what I mean?
That's what she said in the text.
That's why I bring it up.
What?
What?
Yeah.
He says something about getting deep inside of her.
Mark has a text.
He pulled up the text.
And he said, I want to rearrange the text.
No, But you know what?
Let's just get back to the next one.
We'll get to the Steve Smith.
Okay, go.
Let's just look at this.
So Steve Smith Sr., prolific wide receiver, like 5'9, firecracker.
Also, would beat the shit out of you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Down to fight anybody.
No.
Tall guy.
I'm just saying.
Yo, 5'11.
That's crazy.
He's like on the field.
He was like the Aaron the Plumber of the NFL.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But he actually won every fight.
He would beat the shit out of people much bigger than him.
Like, okay.
He said, turn you over into deep inside of you.
She said, you're so hot.
Deep is an understatement.
It felt like you were going to rearrange my IUD.
You were so deep.
Nah, that's crazy.
Imagine your wife texting, bro.
That's girl.
Imagine your wife.
Why are you happy about this, son?
You got a wife.
No, I'm not happy that she's cheating, but I'm like, yeah, rearranging some IUTs.
I like that.
That's dangerous.
That's bad for me.
Feminine health.
You can't rearrange.
That's a man's wife, bro.
Also, that.
Both of us.
That's a man's kids.
Your son, she's the one fucking up.
I can't be mad at him.
You had a good point.
He had a good point.
I'm brilliant.
Like, I was like, because we were going, why the fuck would you call Steve Smith Sr. not talk to your wife?
And Al, say your point.
You had a good point.
Because he's married and he has a family.
Steve Smith.
Yeah.
So he's like, yo, my shit up.
I'm family.
Your shit up.
I'm fucking your shit up.
That's why he says, like, in the beginning, he's like, oh, people are going to care a lot longer about, I mean, care about this longer about him than it is about me.
Yeah.
I bet Steve Smith's wife thought he was faithful.
I bet every NFL and NBA athlete, their wives is just like positive that person is.
I bet Steve Smith's wife is calling that dude's wife like, yo, he does be fucking up the IUD.
Girl, you got to get the extra deep one, girl.
Also, guys, show dates.
First of all, thank you to everybody in Bray who came out.
Seven shows, 600 people.
That's 4,200 tickets we moved in one weekend.
That was fire.
Nashville, every show is sold out.
So we added a Saturday at 4:30.
I don't think we're going to have the capacity to add any others.
So get tickets to that.
March 14th and 15th, Tulsa, Oklahoma.
March 21st and 22nd, Omaha, Nebraska.
March 28th and 29th, Columbus, Ohio.
April 11th through, I believe it's going to be 13th, Tampa.
And we just added a couple more dates.
We got May 9th and 10th in Virginia Beach.
Also, 420 weekend.
You know, we're going to be back in Denver.
All those dates and more coming at Akashing.com.
What's up, guys?
World's fastest ad read ever.
Baltimore, Belmore, New York, Rochester, New York, Portland, Maine.
I'm coming to all these places.
This thing right here looks like Mark's dick full of come.
It's not full of suck on that.
Please, no.
Hydration.
February 27th.
I'll be in Baltimore.
March 1st, I'll be in Belmore, New York on Long Island.
March 26th, I'll be in Rochester, New York.
April 27th, I'll be in Portland, Maine with my friend Joey Avery.
I can't wait to see you guys there.
Come and hang out and have a putting it.
Suck his dick.
Have a friendship with me.
Thank you.
I know his wife is pissed off, but do you think she's less pissed because the girl he's cheating with is ugly or more pissed because the girl he's cheating with is ugly?
I think they get more pissed at that.
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's more insulting.
Because they're like, if you wanted an ugly girl, you could have fucked me.
No, I'm not saying Cease Smith's wife is hungry.
I don't know what his wife looks like.
But like that fucks with your psyche.
Like, you know, women place the way we place our worth on like our worth, I guess, and money.
This looks for them.
So like, imagine she's fucking, imagine your wife cheating on you, some broke, motherfucker, and that's, they're don't betting you any other way.
All right, broke.
Let me put this out there.
Your wife cheats you.
Broke makes us make more effort.
Okay.
No, no.
This is why I want to ask you this.
Your wife cheats on you or your girl cheats on you because you don't have a wife.
Damn.
Because you're not married.
Okay.
Because you're not married.
Grown up like an adult.
I ain't going to get cheated.
The fuck?
Cheater on you still get to be like, we weren't even together.
Exactly.
I didn't even know that girl.
See, I was smart.
I clocked her.
I didn't even know her.
Who is that?
That's my side piece.
I didn't even talk.
Wasn't Steve Smith doing a pod at WTF?
No.
No, Black Effect.
He was doing Black Effect.
He was doing pod with Charlamagne.
Yeah, it was one of their first podcasts.
Oh, really?
Yep.
Oh, that's wild.
Damn, he cheated on them and went to another network.
I didn't know loyalty.
Did you see this one?
I didn't say this.
I would never say this, but people did say that this girl looked like Jeff Van Gundy.
Nah.
Oh, shit.
I didn't say that.
I would never.
I'm just reporting with the internet.
Yo, God.
Is that girl?
That's the girl that he cheated with.
That's pretty.
That's a rephrase I guess.
If you see her and then his wife is like, what are you doing here?
She must be looking ass or some shit like that.
Like, it got to be something more.
Also, when you're on the sidelines and it's just like the most diesel testosterone-induced dudes ever, and there's one girl that's there.
Oh, yeah.
And she got the Sarah Palin glasses on.
That's true.
Yeah, you might have to nail it.
She's also a freak.
Wait, by all intents and purposes.
I mean, the things that she was saying, you should never say to another man besides your husband.
It was nuts.
Barely even say that.
I'd hate for my girl to say that shit to me.
I'd be like, what the hell?
You're a mother.
Why are you saying this?
Yo, don't know, dude.
Do you talk different to your girl now?
I mean, I always kind of did.
I don't know.
I was never into something too freaky because I was like, oh, this feels.
But now that you have a kid, do you guys, like, when you guys are doing dirty talk, when you're like, what dirty talk?
No, but when you're like, there's nothing happening.
Leviticus 22 of that.
And the body of Christ was buried.
Brandon, it's not that funny, Bradley.
It's not that funny, Brandon.
Come on.
I'm just saying, when you guys are throwing Bible quotes at each other, like.
Dude, I'll hit her with a psalm every now and again.
Yo, listening to music is just letting another guy dirty talk a girl and you're paying stream money for it.
What about you being a cuck, baby?
What about girls?
You're going to fucked up with girls singing?
Dude, whap or whatever that shit is called.
That's insane.
Hold on.
No one's ever had sex doing girls singing.
That's never happened.
I don't think.
Name one song by a woman that you have sex with.
Adina Howard.
What's that one?
What's the t-shirt and panties?
I put on Let It Go.
When they're like, I didn't come yet.
I'd be like, hit it.
Hit it, Adina.
But yeah, dude, there's a...
You can't be getting cucked out.
You got to just put on beats.
That's it.
Future tight beats?
Yeah, just beats.
Can't have no another dude's voice in a room.
I agree.
I never liked the music.
It always seemed too contrived.
It always felt like, oh, yeah, we're getting like, what are we doing?
And this is like, what did this come from the guy who has Seinfeld playing in the background?
Yeah, he did it.
That's how long I knew I would go.
And then I'm like, oh, I made it a whole episode.
I mean, I ain't catching okay, so I can still go.
Yeah, he offered her a glass of red wine.
Yeah, whatever.
She should have went white, bro.
He did.
That's how he got in trouble.
No, I thought she was black.
No.
Fuck a black girl.
I thought it was a black girl.
No, come on.
You think when is a blood girl?
No, he's got fucking railroaded dude.
Please.
That is anti-not we are.
That's anti-Indian racism.
That's what it is.
What?
Like this girl going on a date with an Indian guy.
They're like, yeah, I'll see you.
Like, everyone believes that.
And then everybody's just, yeah, that's anti-Indian racism.
We got to stop that.
We got to stop believing it.
You're saying, yeah, yeah.
Son, I saw a TikTok where they sell in Bangladesh, they sell tickets on top of the train.
Dead ass.
No, I can't pay for that.
Anti-Indian Racism Explained00:15:32
Look it up right now.
They got inside seats and outside seats, and they got hang-on seats.
That's corruption.
They can't charge for the top.
We need Doge, bro.
Yeah, they need Doge.
Doge.
They need Doge.
India would never.
If they're going to do it anyway, you might as well make some money off it.
Fair, I guess.
I mean, I can't find a ticket, but I mean, they got this shit, bro.
That's fire.
God.
Maybe they're shooting a music video.
We'd be on a subway surface.
Yeah, you can get a fire music video like that.
Imagine they not like us, but that.
Imagine you pulled up to that, right?
It's too many.
You know nothing about the culture or anything.
You're just a tourist from Canada.
You show up.
Isn't there part of you like, where's that train going?
Yeah, they know something I don't know.
Right?
Like, don't you want to go wherever the fit that's going to fit?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because that doesn't seem like I'm going to work, right?
That seems like a trip to a place.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wait till you get there.
And the English think they invented the double-decker bus.
Yeah.
Get out of here, dude.
Right?
The audacity.
You think that's where they got the idea?
Yeah.
Yo, people like being on the top.
Yeah.
Damn, they really take everything from y'all.
It's crazy.
They really did.
Yeah, it's fucked up.
Fucked up, man.
Can I ask a question about the Matt Damon thing?
Yes, please.
When he throws, he says a line and he you go, oh, we couldn't afford the rights.
And he throws the bacon.
Yeah.
Was that him?
What was that?
What was that?
He throws the bacon.
Oh, yeah.
That's so fire.
Like, actors are so good at shit that they can make things funny.
Oh, a little choice he made, like when he said the red tube and he covered the baby's ears.
Yeah, that was good, dude.
And that was our fault.
We didn't have coverage of him.
There's like certain things that you want to have coverage of everything.
Coverage just means like you want to film every single angle of it.
Yeah.
And that's something I realize about Curb Your Enthusiasm that is so smart is that every scene they shoot, I'm pretty sure.
What's that?
I think they do triple coverage.
Yeah.
So they'll do like a wide shot and then two side shots.
Yeah.
And then the problem with it, there's not really a problem, but like the scenes, like if you're like a fucking cinematographer, like they look kind of like flat or whatever.
There's not these like beautiful moves.
But the reality is what we care the most about is the interaction.
Yeah.
And there's no way, like on a traditional sitcom, it's usually setup punch.
But in Curb, it's argument.
And the only way you could get them going is if you have them both covered and then just riffing.
And one of the cool things about Curb is you could see them break a little bit.
Yeah, dude.
There's one I always remember where Larry's friend Richard Lewis, who passed away, but he's upset about something because I think he said Jerry stole, I mean, Larry stole his voicemail greeting.
And he's like, I want you to change yours by sunset.
And then Gary, and then Larry laughs.
He goes, by sunset, were you Gary Cooper?
But you could tell by sunset made him laugh.
And then Richard laughs at Gary Cooper.
Gary Cooper's like some old cowboy movie guy.
And so then Richard starts laughing and he's like, change the thing.
And it's like, oh, y'all are both just making each other laugh right now.
So how much do you think like going into, let's say you're going into Curb and you're not like a newbie, you have a relationship with them.
How much are you keeping in the tuck to surprise them for real?
And how much are you going over beforehand?
Like this would be a fun apparently.
He just goes in and says, like, this is what the scene is about.
And then you guys go.
I thought they have a skeleton like where it needs to start, where it needs to end.
Yeah.
Do one run through, and then they do another run through where it's like, ah, riff as much as you want.
Just start with it.
And then they just try to.
But if you got a banger, you save it for that second run through.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like what some people do is like they wait until they get their coverage.
Yeah.
So like if you're not on camera, you're kind of going through the motions of the second.
You get it.
Yeah.
What some people do.
I didn't know that that's what people do.
So like when you're super low on the call sheet, like when nobody gives a fuck, like every role I've ever had.
Yeah.
I'm not even on camera and I'm like giving it my best.
And I'll have lines of like, oh, I got that shit.
That was fire.
And then it will come back to my coverage.
And then all the actors leave.
You're just there with the stand-ins.
Like, I just use my hot shit.
I can't run this back.
Yeah.
Bro, me and Miles were just watching a video of Celine Dion getting upstaged by a singer.
And when they did the run-through, the rehearsal, he was kind of phoning it in.
Oh, and then they got on TV in Sweden and he fucking crushed.
And you just see her face, just go like, what the fuck?
What the fuck is this guy?
She gets pissed.
You have a little.
Hold on, let me pull this up.
See, now he's doing too much.
I mean, kind of fire, dude.
Yeah.
If you're that guy, apparently he's like a super famous Swedish singer.
So she was the moment.
And she was like, oh, I'm going to do him a little favor.
I'm going to go on his little show, like, help him out.
And then he busts that out.
I love watching those videos.
She looks tight about it.
She's not happy.
You brought me to Stockholm for this fucking motherfucker to embarrass me.
Can you share what the Mad Damon cutaway was going to be?
Oh, yeah.
It was first, like, it was before he agreed.
I was like, yo, all you got to do is you just got to be there.
And what the fuck was it?
I was like, yeah, I got a special.
I actually forgot.
It was going to cutaway to a bunch of his films.
Oh, yes, So the yeah.
All right.
So the original one was we were going to compete, right?
And I show mine.
And then he goes, oh, you want to play this game with me?
I'll play it.
Let's fucking, you want to play this game?
Let's play this game.
And then he goes, and it's all of his greatest films, right?
And then the last scene is behind the candelabra, the one where he plays Michael Douglas's boyfriend.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he's like hooking up with Michael Douglas.
And I'm like, did you mean to keep that last one in?
And he's like, yeah, it's some of my best work.
And I was like, yeah, this right here.
Bro, I'd never seen this.
This is fire.
So Michael Douglas with a wig looks hella like Al Pacino.
Oh, all right.
Go to the shit.
See, that's amazing.
They make everybody do that for Hollywood.
But he did this shit after he made it.
Come on, bro.
You got to love Damon.
That's how you stay in.
Even like the boss in him kind of comes out here a little bit.
He's like, all right, I'm not going to like kiss you back.
You can kiss me, but I'm not going to go.
I love when Akash almost looks away.
Akash can't watch these videos, bro.
Yeah.
Surprise.
But you sort of tuck your head, but keep it looking in the right direction.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, I'm going to, we got to remember what I'm going to jerk off to later.
I don't want to watch it with you guys.
Bro, do you have an armpit fetish?
You ever thought about that?
No.
I was talking to Lil Pete.
And he's got big old foot fetish.
Shout out to Lil Pete.
The ledge, Lil Pete.
He's got big foot fetish.
I like him even more now that I know that he's.
I was like, when he just called himself a foot scoot, he's like, oh, if the middle toe is longer, it's terrible.
Yeah.
And I was like, Toe, but yeah.
Okay.
All right.
Yeah.
If the middle toe is longer, you're in orangutan.
The second toe shouldn't be longer.
Yeah, but yeah, it is the second toe.
And I was like, oh shit.
So he's got the same brain as y'all.
Yeah.
And then he's like, but the thing I like more than feet, armpits.
Okay.
And I was like, all right.
What do you like about him?
And he started showing me the armpits he likes.
Okay.
I've never thought of this, but I'm open to it.
I'm open to it.
This is why the birth rates are going down, bro.
Why?
Why?
This is shit.
I care about feet and armpits.
I don't know.
This might be your guy's new thing.
All right.
Let's just see.
I don't know what this is.
And it's not safe for work content.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're going to go top.
Let's go by like, uh, let's go by this year, just like the hits of this year.
Tell me, does this do anything for you?
No, I don't notice it.
No, I mean, sure, but yeah, I mean, yeah, no, no, armpit.
I think I see how that one's nice.
I think you can sell me on this.
Here we go.
Oh, armpit.
Oh, that's again, these look like standard armpits to me.
Yeah, but I don't even see a difference.
But you wouldn't lick it or anything.
No.
All right.
What does he say he likes about?
What wouldn't I lick?
Is a question that you better ask it.
I mean, it's like he says every time he's with a girl, the first thing he does, he licks their armpits.
Oh, that's you know, first thing.
That's not first.
Check the feet.
The feet are good.
Armpit licking.
What's the grossest shit used to do during a hookup?
Come on now.
Why?
Just me.
Because it's just me.
Well, talk about y'all wives in the beginning.
Come on.
That's crazy.
A bit more.
That's crazy.
These are the good wives.
Bro, I used to share some saliva generously.
Trying to find a way to say that without it seeming too crude.
You know what I mean?
Not like in an aggressive way, but just a little hock to it.
Yeah, just a little hawk to it.
And then I remember I did that once, like, and it was like passionate part of the moment.
I did it.
I remember spit a little saliva in her mouth.
I remember she just went, What the fuck did you just say?
Destroyed the movie.
Never recovered from that.
I remember the first time a girl asked me to do that to her, and I to her.
No, no, no, no, I didn't know you, so she's like, champ do the phlegm.
It's got to be what's already in there.
But champ kept going.
No way.
She told me like a couple days later, she's like, when I do that, this door is going to be a little bit different.
She taught you how to spit in the girl's mouth.
Oh, wow.
You had fucking poppy seeds and shit.
Half a bacon egg and cheese in the girl's mouth.
She's still chewing on it.
I know.
Yeah, it's fucking disgusting.
No, I used to be nasty, bro.
No, but girls are going to get nasty too.
I remember that one girl that would eat my butt a little bit.
And then I started like really cleaning it.
And then one time she didn't.
And I was like, and I prepared it.
Yeah.
And now I'm looking foolish.
Like I got a perfectly clean ass for one time.
No dingleberries, nothing.
There was like 1% toilet paper in my ass.
I haven't had it that way since I was like 13 years old.
Brand new underwear?
How far did you go to Prime Minister?
I went.
I was like, hold on a second.
I went to the bathroom.
Soap and water.
Like, God, it's so nice.
Like, if I could have eaten it, I would have eaten it.
It was so clean.
It was unbelievably clean.
Let's get back to the shit.
It is crazy that Charlemagne got a full Brazilian whack before bouncing.
Yo, Charlamagne got a full Brazilian from the top.
I get down here, but the top is off.
That's crazy.
And asshole.
Yeah.
Asshole's not crazy to me.
That's the crazy thing.
This is the part that's crazy.
It's all crazy to me.
Because that means something's going on.
I mean, yeah.
Hasn't Charlamagne said the thing about the little finger in there?
It's maybe in the past, though.
Hold on.
A finger, you don't need to wax.
It depends what you got going on.
That's for the finger.
You know what I mean?
What do you think it's for?
No, y'all are acting crazy right now.
No, That's a tongue.
That's a tongue.
Yeah, I go crazy.
You going crazy?
No.
You said you got it waxed.
I don't know what you're talking about.
No, no, no.
I never got waxed.
I never got waxed.
I just do the little shave.
You can't do too much of a shave, though.
Yeah, just a buzz cut.
Keep it, you know.
But down there, too?
You're like underneath yourself.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Take my fingers.
You're cooching everything.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You open up your cheeks to shave down there.
Yeah.
I feel like that's more homosexual.
How you spread a cheek and get in there?
Yeah.
You squat.
I got a hairy ass.
You squat.
How do you get in?
No, it's just no.
Boom, boom, boom.
No, that's not.
He says I'll cut you.
It doesn't look good.
You got to go spread evil.
It's too much.
No, if it's on one, it's fine.
You don't got to.
What are you looking at?
It feels weird separating your butt.
Yeah.
I hit the taint, but that's, you know, that's evil.
When you're in the shower and you're washing your asshole, you ain't spreading a cheek.
Yeah, no, to get inside.
No.
I said, well, you got a dirty ass.
I don't spread, but I get in between like I'm wiping.
But that's still not shaving.
That's a different thing.
Yeah, dirty.
This is what I'm going with.
You got to spread a cheek, make sure it's clean.
Bro, I don't even shave nothing, bro.
That shit is whack.
Hell.
That shit is whack.
Sometimes I.
I came in today.
Shave.
Look at you.
No, this one.
You can tell your wife is home.
Try to pull it together a little bit.
This motherfucker looked like a Neanderthal last three weeks.
I did look like Survivor in my own apartment.
It looked like I was on Castaway or some shit.
It was bad.
She's like, yo, you got to wash your hands wash.
You can tell she's home.
That is funny.
Did she tell you you had to clean?
No.
No, but it was, I mean, it's so bad because I thought I cleaned the apartment good.
And then I had the lady that came by.
She comes by like once a month to tidy up.
And she came by and cleaned it.
She spent like three hours snitching on me the whole time.
Texting my wife, like, oh, yeah, like, what do you want me to do with like the crumbs on the bed?
I was like, you don't have to bring that.
Just clean them.
That's what I said.
She cried after that.
She was like, You can't snitch on me.
Do you want me to wash the sheets with all the clothes on it?
I was like, hey, you don't need to bring any of this up.
This is just between us.
Yeah.
But then also, remember when I had the stomach?
She speaks English.
Yeah.
Latina?
Yeah.
You would think they would know.
You would think, right?
Look it up.
You would think.
And remember when I had the stomach flu?
I accidentally threw up in the toilet and then some of it splashed on the wall and I didn't notice.
My girl caught it immediately.
I mean, she goes, Mark, what is this?
Of course she did.
It's fucking vomit on the wall.
I didn't know.
I didn't notice a lumbo.
It's vomit on a wall.
How fucking you talk?
It was one tiny dot in the corner.
She was like, what is this?
This is disgusting.
No.
Yeah.
I tell the truth.
I know.
Mark threw up all over my bathroom in college once and we just left the door closed for three days until he came back and cleaned it.
It was so fucking bad.
We like keep the door shut.
Yeah, that was bad.
And I was like, Mark, you got to come back.
We're not.
The house was condemned, I think.
It was awful.
Literally, if I came about three weeks and the windows in the entire house were just open.
It was awful.
So yeah, my bad.
I would notice that.
I think your girl would notice that.
It was bright pink.
Do you remember?
It was like teletubbies.
Yeah.
Is your cleaning lady worried about getting sent back?
I don't think so.
I think she's a citizen.
I mean, I didn't check documentation.
I'm not like that kind of guy.
Yeah.
Like when she came in, I wasn't like, yo, we need paper.
None of us do.
But I'm a little concerned about Mark.
Yeah, same.
Yeah.
I inquired about her.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
I was like, yo, you good with everything?
She's like, yeah, I should be good.
If she wasn't good, what could you do?
Find a new cleaner.
I was like, do I need to start searching?
You know, because the way you said it, I was like, you're going to help me.
I'm not asking for her.
There's like I would do.
Well, I could marry her.
I'm not married.
You already got one immigrant.
Damn.
Yeah, I thought about that today.
I was talking to my like, also, they got to be scared, like our cleaning ladies, because they're seeing Trump on an episode and they're like, you know, like, it's not like that doesn't pop up on one of their feeds.
Like, they're just on TikTok or Instagram or some shit.
And then they see us all sitting down with the guy who's going to.
I don't think Flagrant pops up on my cleaning ladies' feed.
I don't think we're going to be able to do that.
You don't think the illegal immigrants' feed are full of the guy who's going to kick them out?
That's just a point.
Okay, yeah.
Maybe they see that and they're like, oh, I'm good.
Because we're going to take care of them.
Yeah, because you can just call it Trumpeto and just be like, yo, but this one, we got to get him off the bus.
I would make the call, right?
Not for yours.
Not for your fun.
No, no, come on.
Yo, clean the crumbs, yo.
You asking me if you got a clean dirty shit?
His wife asks her.
She must follow up.
There's no way.
Like, they never give up that much info.
Yeah.
She wants to know how dirty you are when she's not around.
Bro, because I was asking her today, I was like, you know, I was like, do you have kids?
And she's like, yeah, I have four.
Koreans Boarding Delta Flight00:07:03
And I was like, oh, word.
Like, and I was like, how old are they?
And she's like, the youngest is four.
And then there's one is eight.
And then two are already in college.
And I was like, oh, shit.
Wow.
And then she was like, she goes, two are born in Mexico.
And then she was like, and two are born here.
And I did, I wasn't interrogating her, but in that moment, I felt like she could think that that was a possibility.
And then I did that fucking classic white thing where I was like trying to relate.
I don't know why I did this.
This is so fucking brutally embarrassing, but I was like, oh, my roommate in college was Mexican.
But when we used to sing mariachi songs all the time.
Yeah, we would go to mariachi, we would sing.
And then she just stopped talking.
Oh, God, did I become like that guy?
I've done that before.
As you get richer, you stop relating to minorities.
It's just like a thing that happens.
I relate to you.
Do you?
I did that one time.
We had a bunch of moving guys from China and they didn't really speak much English, but like fully Chinese.
And I was like, yo, I'll play some music with you.
Japanese moving comes out.
Yeah, that's crazy.
I never.
Yeah.
They might have been spies.
I don't know.
I've seen Jewish moving guys.
Yeah.
How far down the fucking ladder do you have to be where you got?
You got a bunch of guys with yarncas and the girls moving your shit around.
Do they take them right from the West Bank?
Moving people's shit out of the house.
They're the experts.
They'll get you out in 30 minutes.
Does not hear for this comment?
Dove left the room immediately.
But no, these Chinese guys came in.
I was like, yo, what do you want me to play?
Is there any music you guys really like?
And they're like, no, it's whatever.
So I was like playing a Chinese techno song or whatever.
It was like an Asian techno song.
I was playing it.
I was like, I was like, you know, I'm trying to help you.
And then by the end, I was like, where are you guys from, by the way?
And they're like, oh, we're Kazakh.
Oh, yeah, wrong age.
My bad.
Yeah.
My bad.
I didn't know Kazakhs looked Asian.
Yeah.
Kind of, yeah.
I think the Koreans got over there somehow, man.
Dead ass.
Really?
Who's Koreans?
Oh, yeah, them Koreans.
I thought they were borat.
Yeah, I think Koreans got over there.
Oh, wow.
Look that up.
Let me find out.
Because there's a bunch of those Koreans in they look like Middle Eastern Asian mix.
Yeah.
I mean, yeah, that's probably that Silk Road shit, too.
But that guy, Bivol, the guy who fought this past weekend, who was a phenomenal fight, Bitter Bia versus Bivo.
Like, if you want to see highest level boxing, watch that.
Yeah.
One and two.
Two was this past weekend, Bivo one.
And but he's half Korean.
So I think Koreans made their way into like the USSR somehow.
Bro, this is hilarious.
In the 1930s, thousands of Koreans in the Soviet Union were deported to Central Asia.
Yeah.
Supposedly to prevent further Japanese espionage.
That's one way of doing it.
You know what I mean?
We put them in the camp.
They just let them go to Central Asia.
That's kind of nice.
Deporting Koreans to prevent Japanese espionage.
That's really funny.
That's a valid point, actually.
That's a good counterpoint.
How the fuck?
You don't think we had a couple mistakes with the Japanese internment camps?
You don't think there was a Chinatown in some of those internment camps?
Also, if they're Japanese and said they're Korean, you're going to be like, okay.
But also, they send them to a country, but they already have a country.
It's like, like, they could have sent them back to Korea.
No, you're going to Kazakhstan.
Fuck.
Yeah, dude.
Some of those deportation things are wild.
My buddy Christophe, you know, Christophe.
He had a funny joke where he's like, you think on the deportation flights when they send Mexican immigrants back to Mexico, the pilot still does an announcement?
Like, what?
He just gets on, it gets on my guys.
Uh, it's gonna be a kind of a bumpy flight going to Mexico City.
Better luck next time.
And drops him off.
Like, do they do the safety thing?
Like, it's just such a funny idea.
Like, you got to get deported, and you also have a middle seat.
You're like, fuck, dude.
I mean, do we pay for the flight?
How does that work?
I think so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And we just put them on like spirit air and we just send them down there, I think.
Yeah.
And some people get first class.
Yeah.
True.
That's true.
Have they not crashed at all?
Delta keeps crashing, dog.
Huh?
Delta keeps crashing.
They had one.
They had one.
They had another.
No, they had another had to die, or like it was diverted because it was on fire smoking or something like that.
That happens, bro.
I saw something.
I saw something that probably fake.
I was thinking about switching, but I got.
But it's apparently there's been less crashes this year than any other year in recent history.
It's just the shit.
It's just in the news.
Yeah, but there's a term for that.
It's a train derailment.
What is that?
Remember when in East Palestine, there was a train derailment, and then the next like four months, it was like another train crash.
This train got vandalized.
The robbery on a train.
And there's just all these train stories.
And it's like, yeah, train stories are hot right now because this big one.
So let's just fill it up with train stories.
I don't believe this.
No, it was the same thing with migrant crime.
Yes.
That was the big story.
So they were reporting every single day.
Here's my train derailment.
Pretty big story.
Migrant crime, that's like small things.
Like, you can't really ignore.
You can ignore a thousand migrant crimes and just say, you know what I mean?
But a fucking Delta flight flipping on its complete 180.
That's a big story.
And if we're seeing more and more of those, then it's probably like, it's never like they would underreport that before.
Yeah.
That's always a story.
You know, every one of the pilots that have crashed.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wait.
Hold on.
You want to finish the sentence?
If you could guess, what would it be?
Gay?
No?
Close.
I don't know.
He said the flight was flaming on him.
No, it's a female pilot.
You know, I don't want to make a big deal about it because people have died, lost their lives.
And in the Toronto one, no one dies, so you can make fun of it.
Female pilot, also, though.
Yeah.
But it was also a crosswind, right?
So they say.
But what was she, what, what happened?
What was she?
She was trying to.
Apparently, she didn't land.
She didn't adjust well enough.
She was trying to like parallel park it or something.
Yeah.
I think she thought she saw an insect of some sort and then hit a fucking hard left and that shit just barrel rolled.
That's what I think happens.
I think it's hard for them to control their emotions in those moments.
And she freaked out.
That's my personal opinion.
You saw the video of all of them getting off the plane and the flight attendant grabbed the ass.
What?
You didn't see this?
Hold on.
Let me pull this up.
This is hilarious.
Hold on.
You didn't see?
No.
Oh, there's fire.
Hold on.
Let me look this up.
Hang on.
Grabbed whose ass.
The people coming off the plane.
So people are like filing off.
You're like, everyone, get off.
Leave your stuff.
Leave your stuff.
The flight attendant is like just palms.
I think it was a girl, but still, she's like palmed that thing.
Dude, I still, I was just going to switch to Delta.
Do I still do this?
No, Delta's fire.
I got no status with these guys.
You got to start all over.
No, you got to go Delta.
And you'll be there.
You fly every single week.
You'll be there faster than anybody.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're also not looking for upgrades anyway, right?
Like you're buying yourself a first-class ticket or whatever.
Yeah, but I got that.
But the highest stats is kind of nice.
They just hook you up to get on board early, all that little shit.
You get on board early anyway.
You're first class.
Everyone's getting off, right?
Oh.
Oh, no, she's deep.
No, she got in the hole.
That was full on, right?
She waxed before that and everything.
Like, she got fully caked up.
Jason's Late Night Email00:07:48
Oh, oh, no, that's crazy.
For no reason.
Oh, with a double tap.
Unnecessary.
I mean, IUD is readjusted.
Yeah, IUD is completely readjusted.
Anyway, I mean, that's crazy.
You get off the plane, your girl's in front of you just getting just getting grabbed up by that chick.
I'm all right.
I'm good.
You didn't help us put our bags up when we boarded.
Now you're grabbing an ass on the way out.
Now fucking Steve Smith Sr. is the flight attendant.
That we might have to.
I don't know.
All right.
Now, what's the deal, guys?
We had a lot of conversation on the internet about Doge.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Seems like some people are pretty upset about this doge.
Yeah, I don't get it.
I'm actually on board with what I'm hearing.
What was it, John?
What was John Stewart saying?
No, John had a fire piece.
John's the goat.
Yeah, we loved.
Obviously, I'm a big fan.
I'm a fan.
What do you say?
He's just saying, like, if you want to start cutting places, there's a lot of easier targets to cut.
Play if we got the piece, you could play like the first like 30 seconds of it.
But they might bang us on YouTube.
I guess.
Yeah.
All right, so go.
What does he say?
But just like, hey, we can cut Pentagon defense spending.
Love all this.
Yeah.
We can stop giving, what was it, like hedge fund?
No, no, it was the gas companies like $3 billion in subsidies when they're already profitable by trillions of dollars.
You know, doing the thing that John always does, which is like pointing out the most awesome things.
Yeah.
And yeah, he's just, he's just brilliant at it.
So here's the frustration with Doge.
We're having this talk about on idiots too, is it's a real bummer that this becomes such like a bipartisan conversation because, or a partisan conversation, because there is bipartisan support for it.
Yeah.
Like I feel like every single American is like, yo, there's probably some government inefficiency.
No one really trusts the government that much anymore.
Right.
They either don't trust the Republicans, they don't trust the Democrats, or they don't trust the institutions as a whole.
Right.
So this is the time in history to go get some of the bloat out of government, right?
Because we all seem to support it.
Even Bernie Sanders is like, yo, I don't agree with Trump on everything, but I do agree we should look into that Pentagon budget.
Why have they never been audited?
Like there is support here.
And because of the way that they're maybe going about it, right?
They're kind of, I don't even know if this has happened historically.
Charlemagne was pointing out that like Clinton did it, but he did it through government.
But because this guy who's this very polarizing figure, Elon, is coming in and he's just seemingly hacking away at these different industries that are connected to government.
Some people feel like without any real justification.
Like I guess maybe they don't understand why he feels so confident that he can cut these jobs.
Is that the concern?
He's not hired a lot back.
And then some of them are hired back, which I think should happen.
Yeah, I think that's fine.
But I guess the tricky thing right here, I'm curious you guys take on this, is that like there's all the support.
And because Elon is so polarizing, I actually think it's going to be harder to execute something that Americans as a whole do want.
So this is one of those things where like being antagonistic and polarizing, like being what Elon is, is actually hurting a very bipartisan supported effort, which is to clean up government.
And I wonder if he can look at this and learn and go, oh, shit, I'm actually doing something that people want to do, people want in a way that is going to make it harder.
Or do you think he just looks at it as a CEO and goes, I'm cutting and I don't give a fuck what you're doing.
The latter.
And that's just going to piss people off.
But that's how he's done with every company.
Tesla, he did that one.
He's got a company.
But go on, go on, go, go.
That's why they got him for it.
They're like, hey, you got to start treating the government like a company.
Which I don't disagree with in principle at all.
I do.
Because it's like, these are government agencies that were put there to fix a problem.
It wasn't like, hey, this is just a profitable thing that we just have to do.
Our only concern is making profit.
Here's where I would say.
And maybe there's a middle ground between what I'm saying and what you're saying.
If you are not driven in some fashion by some kind of bottom line, there is going to be bloat because there's no incentive for the government to ever lay off anyone.
And this is where I agree with what Vivek was saying.
The government bloats because you can't fire anybody.
Because why would you?
They're government employees.
They don't have to work hard.
They don't have to do anything.
This simple email, this seemed to cause, and to me, I'm an idiot.
Simply asking, what did you get done this week?
Is a very easy thing.
And if you can't, if you have trouble with that email to me, it's as an idiot.
Granted, it seems like you didn't do anything this week, probably, and your job is probably losable.
And I look at that as like, yo, who the fuck are you?
I have people that I report to, heads of my agency.
They're the ones that I answer to.
I'm not answering to some motherfucker who just was granted this power and unconstitutionally.
And now I have to just, I have to prove my worth to this guy.
Fuck it.
I'm going to counterpoint.
I got this message from Jason yesterday at 11.03 p.m.
Guys, I don't recommend sending a Doge email to your wife to provide five bullet points of what they accomplished last week.
Shouts and Jason, dude.
That's so good.
That's really good.
Yeah.
We should do that and just get the reaction.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're holding that.
You got to make sure.
I'm going to drop it right now and just see.
There's no context.
I'm going to ask you.
Wait, how are you framing it?
I'm going to say, hey, can you send me just a five bullet point message of the office this last week?
No, I can't.
I'll come back with like everybody's come back with it.
And she's going to be like, word.
I already told my wife what Jason texted the group.
Yeah, me too.
Yeah.
me too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She's listening in live.
Yeah, Jason's putting the same message.
I wonder if that's even, I wonder if that's a real piece of change that he's trying to implement or that's just an antagonistic measure to rile up the base.
I don't care either way.
Send the fucking email.
Right, right.
To me, just send the email.
Like, oh, I'm antagonized, so I'm not going to report on what I did.
If you did something, send the email.
But what does it do?
I think that's my question about it is like, what does it do?
It just puts them in a position where they're going to have to potentially lie.
I just don't know if it's effective.
Nobody's going to answer that email.
I've done nothing.
You should probably fire me next.
They're going to find bullshit that they did.
So we don't actually get to clean anything up.
And now you've got people bickering online over something we actually agree on.
Yeah, they're also going to use AI to like analyze it, I think, which that might be easy to trick.
What does that mean?
Like, I think they're like getting all these federal emails from thousands and thousands of people.
So they're going to have five million federal employees.
So they're going to have AI like parse what people did and like the top performing people and the lower performing people.
Yeah.
And so that seems gamifiable to me.
Yo, I wonder if they, if they went about this a little different, like instead of doing it on a person to person basis, which these emails are, right?
Because that's when I start to have empathy for someone who's about to lose their job and now said, hey, provide for their family.
Right.
And now I'm less supportive of these cutting measures that Doge is doing.
But rather analyze the different, I don't know what you would even call them.
Like what would you call like it's not a business department?
Department.
Yeah.
Analyze these departments for inefficiency as a whole.
Prove transparently to the American people that there is inefficiency there.
Like I thought the most effective thing they did, and I don't even know if it's true, is showed all the dead people that are still getting the social security.
Right.
I don't even know if that's a real thing.
Betting On The Lakers00:02:58
But if you could actually show proof that dead people were getting social security, like people who've been dead 200 years, still getting social security, you have unanimous support from Americans to be like, all right, well, cut that guy's social security.
He's been dead 200 years.
So start at the department, show the inefficiency, and then you could pass it off to the senators or whoever you want to pass some sort of legislation to cut parts of that department.
But when you go person to person and judging off the email, they said, now I start to feel like, well, shit, I had a lazy week last week, but two weeks ago I was working overtime every single night.
You didn't email me then.
Yeah.
But I think Elon's perspective, and he reposted this thing from Milton Friedman, which is basically, they just go through every department and he just says, cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it.
I think Milton Freeman had three that he wanted to keep.
It was like Justice.
I forget.
There was like two others.
I don't even remember.
But everything else got to go.
Cut all of them.
So then why are you even emailing if you know what you got to cut?
Well, I think that's what he's trying to do.
He's trying to use that as proof to be like, yeah, all these got to go.
Oh, also, can we just do a little sports real quick?
Yeah, of course.
Because this is a big, it's going to have, I guess, already happened.
But tonight, Luca and the Lakers are playing Dallas, the Dallas Mavericks for the first time since Luca got traded.
So I truly believe Luca will score 60.
Like, not even a fucking question in my mind.
Luca scores 60.
I, whatever, if you want to put money on Luca over, take it.
This guy, first of all, loves playing on nationally televised games.
He's keenly aware of when those moments are, and he always plays better.
And he has an extra vendetta.
Like, the mask traded this guy and then just said he was fat and lazy and out of shape.
And he's going to be like, I will show you fat and lazy and out of shape.
And he had his first good game as a Laker on Friday.
Oh, so he had like 35.
He had like 36, 18, some like, some crazy sad line.
He's going to fucking destroy them.
And I'm going to love it.
These guys are insane.
These guys are insanely competitive.
So obviously he's going to go for it.
Do you think that the Lakers support it?
Do you think the Lakers are going to feed him all night?
And I also think LeBron is such a, he's a battery in your back guy.
Like the difference between him and Jordan, and you can side however you want, but Jordan was, I'm going to take care of this guy.
Kobe's an I'm going to take care of this guy.
LeBron is, we're going to take care of this guy.
I'm going to put the batter in your back to give you your best performance.
I guarantee you, LeBron's in his ear all week.
Do you do whatever you got to do?
This is your show.
You're the best player.
Telling him everything.
Is it in LA or Dallas?
It's going to be in LA.
The Dallas one is April 9th.
That would be fun.
I want to go to that game.
Yeah, you should do that.
I want to start a fucking Nico chant.
How do you think Anthony Davis feels right now?
Hurt?
Probably in pain.
Yeah, I've been seeing fucking Laker fans, idiots.
Yo, I was going off on the trade, and so many fucking idiot Lakers fans were like, you don't know what you've got in Anthony Davis.
The first game he got hurt.
Quarter three.
Playing out of his mind for three quarters.
Hurt might be a season ending injury.
And apparently, there's rumors that it was an injury that the Mabs, like the team knew he had, but they just pushed the trade through and forced it through.
And then when they found out how bad it was, they didn't do an adequate physical.
There's a rumor they tried to get the trade rescinded, but everybody had already played games and it was too late.
Firing And Probation Risks00:06:33
Wow.
Yeah.
Bunch of fucking police.
A bunch of fucking raids.
Bunch of fucking idiots.
And I hope Luca scores 82 on you.
I hope he eclipses Kobe.
God bless Kobe, but I hope he does better.
It's going to be exciting.
You should watch.
And honestly, just, yeah, bet the Lakers over.
It's fun to root for white guys.
If not, yeah, even if this has already happened, April 9th.
Dude, yeah.
It is.
I'm pro-DEI.
That's exciting.
I'm pro-DEI.
So I'm pro-Luca.
I love a confident white guy.
I love JJ Reddick.
I love what the Lakers got going on.
I love Austin Reeves.
It's a white team.
Hey, this is the only time Showtime is going to be punctual.
Guys, if you want to get your bets in, you go with Steak.
Okay.
Steak is the largest.
The world's largest U.S. social casino.
That is true.
The world's largest U.S. social casino.
It's the world's largest U.S. social casino.
Again, we don't know what that means.
We are committed to never learning what that means.
But if you find yourself at U.S. social casinos and you want to know which one is the largest in the world.
In the whole world.
Rwanda don't got a larger U.S. social casino.
Definitely not.
Barely got a hotel.
I think you go to Stake and make sure to use the promo code Flagrant for your welcome bonus.
Sports politics, whatever you want to bet on.
Whenever you want, you do it over there at Stake and make sure you use Flagrant for that welcome bonus.
Let's get back to the show.
Pretty much going to every department and just firing everyone that's on probation because those are the ones you can get away with firing because they're not, you know, their job isn't actually finalized yet.
Got it.
And it's like, even that, it's like, all right, so now all this young crop of people who are probably qualified because if they got hired in the first place, now you're just getting rid of all that.
And now you're going to have just a bunch of old people who've been doing it the old way all this time.
It's like, where's the change?
Like, you're going to just have the same thing going on.
And I don't know that that's necessarily true.
Because usually what they do is they fire the old people because they make way more money.
Yeah.
But they're firing all the people on probation.
But why would the young people be on probation?
To clarify, it's not a punishment, probation.
It's a probationary hiring period.
You're on the beginning.
Sorry.
So maybe what they're doing is maybe the thought behind it is, hey, these people aren't even officially hired.
And if we know that these departments have a lot of bloat, why would we fire the people that have been working there for decades?
And that's what they've committed their life to.
Why don't we lay off the payment?
I think that's what you start with.
And then eventually they're going to start cutting some of the bloat as well.
I do think it's a multi-step process.
I do think I'm okay with overcutting government right now because I know what will happen over time is things get added and added and bloated again.
So it's just like, let's cut as much as we can now.
And sure, over time, that's a good point because this is not like a one-time fix.
You're going to have to do this every single fucking year until the end of the country.
And unfortunately, probably are at a point where we're so bloated that we're going to need some pretty drastic cuts.
And dude, I was in California this weekend.
Weather's obviously fucking awesome, all that.
But you're like, oh, you're taxing us at 51% if you're in the top income bracket, but homelessness is still a rampant issue.
Education didn't seem to be very good.
Like public school system doesn't be and I'm not saying taxes never work and not taxing always works at all.
But there is, you have to accept that that money seems to be getting used inefficiently, at least in the states that get taxed the highest.
So why not cut those budgets down, see if the money can get used efficiently.
At the very least, we're not wasting our tax.
I talked to an FBI guy recently and I was asking about like Cash Mattel and like shutting down the Hooper building, all this stuff.
He's like, you shouldn't shut it down.
But he's like, there is so much bureaucracy and bloat within the FBI that you just have like people that have been there for 20 years that haven't done a case in like three decades or like they've been there for their whole life, haven't done a case in three decades, and they don't know what's going on.
And they get more risk averse over time.
So like, he's like, when I started, I was getting assigned on all these jobs.
We were getting all these different cartels.
We were getting all these different organized crime things.
And now I'm trying to get assigned to stuff.
And they're like, oh, it's too risky.
Don't do it.
And he's like, but my job is to go in and infiltrate and get these gangs.
So like, what is my purpose?
And like, slowly he was getting pulled back and put on more easier jobs, like busting buys and like little crack things.
And he was like, this is a waste of time.
Yeah.
So they're getting more risk averse.
They're getting more comfortable in their positions.
And he's like, yeah, you do need to get rid of a lot of people.
I wonder if that has to do with the reward matrix.
Like with cops, I think in the city, there's a quota to the amount of like tickets they have to give out.
So you could go and find the really egregious things and go give them a ticket, or you could wait in like a dark side street of a place where you know guys do like drag racing a lot and then clip them every Friday night when they're drag racing.
Yeah.
Like I wonder if you just gravitate towards the easiest things, which is the risk averse situation.
But when at the FBI, the thing that's going to probably help the country the most is when you're going at the most dangerous.
So now you're clipping this low-level bullshit that isn't really helping everybody, everyday person just so you can meet your quota.
So maybe you need to restructure the reward.
Yeah.
And again, multi-step process.
I think this is step one.
I don't think this is the perfect solution.
I just like actionable steps being taken.
I just wish they because I like the fact that somebody from outside is coming in to make these changes because I don't think people from within, we can't ask you, hey, how can we take money away from you and how can we fire your people?
They're not going to.
And if you, if you were going to change it, you would have already done that.
Exactly.
But I think they should work alongside.
So you have Elon working alongside with some of these department heads and things like that.
And now it's like, okay, he's like, what does this department do?
What, like, what is this money for?
Like, you have to do a bit more surgical cuts than the way that they're doing it right now.
Because you saw they fired people that were in charge of fucking the nuclear warheads and shit like that, had to hire them back.
And like, that could have been a crazy mistake.
I get what he's saying.
Like, there is risk to the overfire, especially in certain sectors.
I agree.
I just, I don't necessarily think that risk is as good.
Like, I don't think the risk is so catastrophic.
I think potentially firing these guys, we're not going to be like, oh, shit, a nuke got fired.
Like, it's just, we're not firing the guys that are.
No, but that could have happened.
I don't, I think that's a bit hyperbolic.
That's all I'm saying.
Also, you could hire them back.
It's not like they're going to work for like the nuke place down the block.
Yeah.
Yeah, but they're the nuke guys.
Yeah, but we just don't know how much like other countries are targeting that thing.
Like, say if there's one person who's like cybersecurity protecting other countries from accessing our nukes and now we were just like with no security there for like a day or two.
I mean, if I'm not.
And that was the one time, boom, they got in.
Twitter Views Amplified Globally00:14:52
If I'm like any of our ops, I'm trying to get a spy into Doge.
Oh, actually.
And I'm trying to get them to push cuts in certain sectors that would be advantageous for me as the opposition.
So I want them to cut defense spending.
I want them to cut any sort of like security apparatus.
Maybe it's a nuclear program.
I would want them to cut development programs in AI or these other technological things that are really going to put America ahead of every other country in the world.
Now, I'm sure there are certain measures that are put in place to stop that from happening, but that's kind of how I'm thinking about it.
This is like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity if you're another country.
Bro, the way these other countries do this shit is so wild.
I was reading the story.
I was talking to this FBI guy.
He was telling me this thing that he infiltrated that they had, there's a guy that's one of the top neo-Nazis on Twitter.
And he has like a bunch of Twitter accounts and he's just putting it like all this racist bullshit.
What's his name?
Ronaldo Nazario is putting all this like super racist shit.
He just runs like hate pages.
He's like, the Jews do this, black people do this.
Look at this crime.
We got to make America white.
He's like a white supremacist.
He lives in St. Petersburg.
Russia or Florida?
In Russia.
Okay, that's important.
And yeah, he's in Russia.
Apparently, he's like a teacher that teaches English, but is getting paid.
Like apparently someone audited his bank account, like hacked into his thing.
He's getting paid like millions of dollars to be like an English teacher, allegedly.
And is pumping all this neo-Nazi shit, creating neo-Nazis in America, aggregating all these like incel kids.
And then basically from St. Petersburg and Russia is like convincing them to do domestic terrorism.
And like they're literally putting in spies, like domestic terrorists, infiltrating, getting them riled up, somehow getting the money in some cases, aggregating all of them, getting them like training techniques, sending them like field manuals from the Marines and shit.
And basically like promoting them to do acts of terrorism.
And half of these idiots don't even, no, no, I bet 99% of these idiots don't even realize they're being manipulated.
They actually think they're fighting a good fight.
They're like, this guy's on point.
He's got all the real research.
I'm going to go and do my YouTube, my, my, my YouTube or my, my Googling to find out why this is all justified.
And you can find a justification for anything.
I mean, their motherfuckers believe the earth is flat.
So so they are out there thinking they're doing the Lord's work when they're doing Putin's crazy.
And then they're setting up like, yo, we're going to shoot up this thing.
We're going to try to free this guy from prison.
We're going to go kill this family because they're communists.
And they're literally plotting all the shit, buying all the equipment.
And this FBI guy infiltrated them to take them out.
There's a guy, I forget his name, but he was bragging about how he was like one of the most viewed people on Twitter.
Right.
And a lot of his shit is just like the Jews do this, the Jews do that.
And they probably do, but that's what his Twitter is.
And he was talking about it.
He's like, yeah, I was one of the most viewed on Twitter.
And I wonder if he even realized that like those views might be amplified by our opposition.
They want that unrest in America.
It's crazy.
This is perfect.
And he's out there going, nah, the people really understand what I'm saying.
They really care about what I'm saying.
It's like, no, Russia does.
China does.
They don't even give a fuck about the Jews or not.
It could be anybody.
It could be Black Lives Matter.
Sure, that they were pumping the exact same people that were shitting all over Black Lives Matter.
Wow.
Yeah.
This is the kind of information that we need out there so that people don't succumb to it because you get those views, you know, your tweets are popping.
You think you're lit.
Yeah.
You think you found out.
Yeah.
This is literally from the BBC.
This article.
This guy, Nazar, is running a militant group from Russia.
Wow.
Wow.
And this is just one guy.
Like, I don't even know how many other guys there are that are doing this kind of stuff.
I'm sure we're doing the same shit over there, but they start to restrict their internet for that reason.
Like, I want, like, we act like they restrict the internet in these other countries because they want to control the ideology within the country.
You can control the ideology within your country very easily.
Yeah.
You can't control it from the outside.
Like, I bet there's way more restriction in other countries simply because they got to worry about their ops.
And we are probably the best at it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oof.
Yeah.
It's a what it's a weird thing because like I'm not anti-free speech.
Like I think we should have free speech, but also people need to know how free speech can be used against them.
So then that's the education process.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're like, you might see something.
It's like some racist guy on Twitter posting funny memes.
You're like, oh, yeah, this is kind of cool.
But like you get in with them and then you start messaging them and then they're like, oh yeah, come join our like, you know, our telegram or whatever.
And then you get on a Zoom call with them.
Then you get vetted by this guy in Russia.
He does a one-on-one call with you to see if you're good.
Sends you an address to go to.
You meet with the guys over there.
You think Dan Bilzerian knows this?
Do you think he knows he's been tricked into doing this?
Bro, why has he become such like the Jews do everything bad?
Like this pivot for him.
Like he was just getting party, he was partying, getting pussy, you know, shooting machine guns.
And now all of a sudden he's like, the Jews are to blame for everything.
Well, because it's hot right now.
You get crazy views on it.
But does he not get views off the pussy anymore?
Like have culture moved away from it and now he had to find another grift?
Yeah.
It's interesting to see these guys pivot.
And they all have pivoted in the same direction.
Like all the Manosphere guys are now the Jews of the problem of the world.
Not all, but you've seen a lot of them gravitate into that space.
Now they're like political experts.
They're analysts on culture.
It's just polluting the otherwise perfectly accurate message.
Yeah.
Y'all are right about that.
But it's like to see to see the exact groups pivot the message exactly.
Do you think they know that they're being tricked and manipulated?
I mean, yeah, I think they're all just kind of following whatever works.
Is it just the trend?
Is it like, oh, this is hot on the internet?
So I'm going to have talent.
So where's the views?
Plastic bag in the wind.
I'm just going to rile shit up.
Bro, you're sounding lip pilled right now, dude.
Am I limp?
You're giving them more credit than I think they deserve.
I think a lot of them don't realize they're being manipulated.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, I agree.
They don't realize it.
But I think what Akash is saying, oh, I thought what you were saying is they're just going towards the views.
The views are in this direction.
They're just following it.
Yeah.
That's what I think.
And they have no clue they could be manipulated by a foreign government.
Gotcha.
Okay.
Yeah.
Bro, are you a Jew lover, dude?
Dude, ever since you went to Hollywood, bro.
I can't believe you fucking said that, dude.
Fuck that, dude.
I don't believe in DI.
Dude, white supremacy is such DI.
Why don't we ever have that conversation?
Yeah.
Like these white guys are like, I believe in meritocracy, except white people should control everything.
And we got to stop letting everybody else control us.
All right, then control it, man.
That's what we're saying.
How do the Jews control the world?
They can't even control Jewelands.
There's a little piece of land that they've been fighting over, yet they control the whole world.
Yeah.
We talked about that with the Vivek rant.
It's like, you guys love a Viveka saying if you think he's talking to black people.
The second white people get told, pull yourself up by your bootstraps.
How fucking dare.
They go DI, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
How dare you.
White people love DEI when it's for white people.
That shit is so gay.
Yeah.
This needs to be a white country.
Make it white.
Make some babies, pussy.
Do you know what I mean?
Go to the IBM doctor like your boy.
You can't get it done.
Elon's out here trying to keep it white.
He got 13 motherfucking babies.
He's doing his part.
This shit is so pussy.
Whenever you see the blackest thing, got 13 baby mamas all suing him.
Black people, nah, nah, he's spitting.
He's spitting.
I like this guy.
But there's something to that.
Like the white supremacy shit being DEI.
Because if you think you're the best, go be the best.
Yeah.
Like, don't cry about it.
Just do it.
Like, white people colonized the entire world.
During that time, they weren't like, oh, we need to be the best.
We're the master race.
They were just doing it.
They were just like, look, the sun doesn't set on the British Empire.
We don't got to tell you anything.
Go back to that.
Build a ship.
Build a ship.
Get a longboat.
Colonize somebody.
Grow your beard out.
Don't fucking cry on Twitter about the Jews.
Yeah, white supremacy is lame, dude.
I just like racism.
That makes more sense.
Racism kind of fire.
Racism makes more because that's easier to get on board with.
You'd be like, hey, those people smell.
You'd be like, all right, cool.
Yeah, I'm with that.
Somebody?
No, I'm just saying, it's whoever you want it to be.
You put anyone in there.
That's a choose your own adventure.
But those are offensive.
Let's get back to the show.
Yo, how do you feel about the Nazi salutes?
Because now those are.
Who Bannon threw one up?
Yeah.
But he's just a fucking.
But like now, does that put any credence on what Elon did?
Because clearly what Bannon did was intentional.
Like you can't say that wasn't.
I think what he did is, I think he did it.
I think he just wants attention.
Like I think Bannon's on the outs.
He's just trying to get attention.
He's trying to rally people.
This is what he's been good at.
But now he's no longer on the inside.
So he's just trying to like get shit going and cook stuff up.
And the only way he knows how to do it is to be super antagonistic and he can tap into that core.
But you don't think they also see the rise of white supremacy and they're like, yo, we gonna rile it up?
He's got great hair.
It could be.
No, he's gotta be correct.
It could be.
I also think to Schultz's point, it's the same thing with the red pill guys are doing where it's like, oh, okay, here's an opportunity.
Let me make some noise.
Let me get some attention.
Let me do whatever.
Let me throw this hand up.
You see what I'm saying?
Like, to Schultz's point, I need attention.
I'm starved for attention.
I'm not getting it any other way because I'm not good enough at what I do.
So I have to reach for this low-hanging fruit.
Bannon just wants to tell you.
There you go.
It's also worth noting.
Like, even this guy was talking.
He's like, the white, the neo-Nazi shit, he's like, there's maybe like a couple thousand.
It's like, it's not like this rampant thing.
Not all Republicans are neo-Nazis.
Like, not all of them.
No, of course not.
That's a majority problem.
All groups start small and then keep going.
Right.
So it's like, that's a shit.
I don't want people to get comfortable with that.
Tell us about your people.
Go.
No, I just also think the fear is that these are people that are very close to Trump.
Even if they're a small group, Steve Bannon was his former chief strategist.
Is anyone in the outs now, though?
Elon, I understand.
Like, he's at the largest political activist group for conservatives.
Like, he's, you know, that's valid.
That's valid.
Yeah.
They're in position.
Even if they're not within the cabinet, they're within pretty high positions within this.
I think that's the fear people are having.
Yeah.
And you normalize that shit.
But a lot of these neo-Nazis hate Trump.
Like, they hate Republicans.
They hate America because America is like funding it.
Now, this point is just in general.
Yeah, that's what's interesting.
So this guy was saying that a lot of them voted for Hillary.
They voted for Kamala because they're accelerationists.
They're like, if we vote for Hillary, the whole country will get destroyed.
The border will be open.
Police will be defunded.
And then that'll lead us to our ultimate D-Day, which is when white people.
So I think you're arguing different things too.
I think you're arguing that true neo-Nazis and what they believe and feel is one thing.
And I think Alex is saying making it normal, making it okay to just throw up a Nazi salute will move people toward being more okay with racism, correct?
Yes.
And you take away from the actual criticism.
Like you should be able to criticize Israel like every other fucking country in the world.
Like we criticize Canada left and right.
We can't criticize Israel.
Yeah.
Like literally all of us called Justin Trudeau a cuck.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Every single day for like three years straight.
Yeah.
We can't talk about fucking BB Netanyahu.
Of course we can't.
Well, tie it in if you criticize Israel.
Then it's like, oh, that's unsematic.
Which is unfair.
But when you throw a fucking Nazi salute up, now it gives them credence to thinking that it's anti-Semitism.
They had their ammo to go, look at that.
If you guys are.
Don't do that.
If you're just like, yo, that guy who runs a country is a piece of shit.
Yeah.
Or call him gay like we did, Justin Trudeau, that's really effective.
Nobody's tried that with him.
Questions sexuality.
Justin Trudeau has to step down.
That's facts.
That's true.
And how come you're at this conservative convention and no one is...
We don't know if no one's pushing back.
There are people that barely.
I don't see Fox News saying, oh, that was so wrong of him doing this.
He's right.
I don't watch enough Fox to know.
I don't watch enough Fox.
And we don't hear it in the Zeitgeist.
Yeah, like Trump should be coming out.
Yo, I don't agree with that.
The fact that Trump would never do that, but to your point, the Zeitgeist doesn't seem to be like, we didn't even know about that.
The Zeitgeist doesn't see, what the fuck is this guy doing at the CPAC?
Also, there's so many people that like, this is the other thing, and I will defend politicians, even on both sides in this, it's like, you don't have to come out against every single thing that someone within your party does.
Like, it's not up to the leader of the Democratic Party to talk about the fringe senator that says there's 67 genders and be like, I don't believe in that.
Which, to be honest, is just as like annoying to the American voter.
It might be advantageous to do that for the Democrats to like call them out, but it's not up to Kama, whoever the fuck is out there for every single senator that opens their mouth or every single like local congressman that opens their mouth and says some goofy shit to be like, I disavow.
I disavow.
You can be disavowing all this.
I don't see Bannon at CPAC.
He's kicked out.
For me, I'm like, if I'm part of Trump squad, I'm like, yo, we kicked that goofy motherfucker out.
He's just trying to get attention.
I don't even know why you let him on stage.
Say that.
No, I don't.
The fact that you say quiet, it's like, I don't think Trump's got to say anything necessarily.
I think Al's point does hold some credence or whatever credibility, though, in that it doesn't seem to be any, nobody seems to be reacting, which is a little crazy.
Nobody, there's no tweets that we're seeing.
There's no nothing.
There's no stories.
I don't think Trump has to acknowledge everything.
I think we put that on him.
Yeah, I don't say everything, but I think that's at a level that needs to be.
I don't personally, I'm like, there's people who take shots at us sometimes or say crazy and we're like, we're not even giving them oxygen.
That's true.
Think about it.
I think the fact that nobody's saying anything.
I think Bannon is below the level of React Too.
He's just a citizen at this point.
He's not even part of government.
Like if he's influential in this, what is it called?
Not CPAC.
It's CPAC?
Yeah.
If he's influential in CPAC, if he actually is, or if he's just a speaker that's up there, I think that's where you decide.
If he's actually influencing where the money goes, because if the money starts getting clipped, then maybe, you know, Trump starts to speak up.
But at the same time, like, there's no way Steve Bannon's going to say something and then they're going to stop funneling money into Trump's agenda.
Fuck no.
Conservatives are running everything right now.
If anything, they should be telling Bannon, yo, can you shut the fuck up?
We're actually doing some good work right now.
We have everything under control.
You're going to fuck this whole thing up and make everything radioactive because that's the only way you know how to get attention.
The Bannon is the type of guy.
The only way he knows how to get attention is just make it radioactive.
There are certain people that can get attention from art.
There's certain people who can get attention from creativity.
There's certain people who can get attention from literally understanding what's going on and delivering the facts in a fun and knowledgeable way.
Like that's a Jon Stewart, right?
Like, I don't think anybody goes, oh, he's just biased.
He's trying to manipulate people when John talks.
Right?
Like, we trust him.
But Bannon's just, how do I be radioactive?
Oh, if I throw this up, I'll do it.
It's like wrestling to him.
Like, I literally think he's up there and he's just going.
So they looking at him like Kanye?
Kanye is what I was thinking.
I can't tell you what they are.
That's what I look at him out there.
I'm like, I don't take that guy seriously.
But if you take CPAC seriously, I don't think you have him speaking.
This is the largest conference.
This is like their big conference.
Yeah, no, no.
I think that you got to look at it and you got to be like, what the fuck?
And I think you got to have some maybe behind the scenes talk.
But if he comes out and talks about it publicly, what do you think Bannon's going to do with that?
Bannon's going to use that as oxygen.
He's going to light it up even further.
Government Overreach Concerns00:15:42
Yeah, that's fair.
He's like, he's going to say, this guy, Trump, is defending a migrant over me who actually cares about America.
I think giving him any oxygen is going to divide the party even further.
And this is what fucking happens every single time.
You get in power, you have an agenda, you're ready to go, and then some motherfucking egotistical narcissist that has no ability to execute anything.
Parasite.
Yeah, exactly.
Comes in and for their own indulgence.
Elon abandoned which one?
No.
What's going on?
Elon got to be Elon is the bank.
You know what I mean?
He don't have to parasite.
I mean, he gave, what, 240 mil to 270 to me?
270.
Two bill.
So he's seeping.
He's getting some returns.
Oh, no.
You know, I would call that parasiting as well.
I don't love the turn Elon has taken in general in terms of like everything being a fucking conservative talking point and like, oh, the South African genocide of white people is the, he said it was the biggest issue in our lifetime.
And it's like, you were alive when South Africa was actually apartheid, right?
That wasn't, I don't think it's the biggest.
Yeah.
Genocide in Rwanda.
It's like watching him parrot these Republican talking points is also nauseating.
Like you're smart enough to have an opinion on your own.
So that's my criticism of Elon.
I don't look at him the same way I look at Steve Bannon.
And it does suck because I really used to be an Elon guy.
I'm still an Elon guy.
I'm like, with everything he's been doing lately, it's hard for us to see.
I don't buy the art from the artist.
Oh, I mean, if I can listen to Kelly throwing it on my truck, are you afraid your shit's going to get vandalized?
Have you seen that?
Yo, I had a dude throw a fucking snowball at the car.
All right, that could have been bad at all.
I think it's because it's just New York.
Nah, but they wouldn't do that to any regular thing.
That was some cocky shit to go on.
That was unbelievable.
I won't.
Are you from New York or not?
Then do that.
Do that.
Don't talk about it on the podcast.
I'm just in a group with him.
But that's going to come with it.
That's what I'm saying.
Like, I think the car being a cybertrack had something to do with the money.
It's an attention-seeking car.
Not saying that that's what you want it for.
There are other things.
You've always loved Teslas.
I think they're throwing the snowball because it's Elon.
It could be Elon, but it's also like, even if it wasn't Elon, even if somebody else owned it, it's such a different-looking car than anything else.
And, you know, when eggs are $40 and you see a guy walk driving around in a spaceship, there's a moment and you have a snowball in your hand.
There's a moment where you go, you know what?
Fuck that guy.
I keep that.
I keep that shit.
No, it's kind of far.
Yeah, I drive with that.
Devon, what are you doing?
Making me more proud of my car?
I think that is the biggest thing most people feel: they're like, all right, we're changing the Gulf of Mexico.
We're cutting all these things.
All right, but like things are still expensive.
Like, I think that's how most people feel.
It's like my day-to-day has not improved.
It's like we're doing all this stuff.
That's cool.
But like, I'm wondering if they're having buyers of remorse yet.
I don't think so.
I think there's so much excitement in what has been achieved.
And you have to understand, like, there are a lot of people that agree with what Trump and Elon are trying to do.
There's a lot of people.
There's a lot of support behind it.
Matter of fact, we support it.
We support it, right?
Like, we're all sitting here going, yeah, we have to cut the bloating government.
The way that they're doing it.
Yeah, we have to see.
Like, is that bad?
My feeling in general is just like, let's just see what happens.
No, I agree.
No, that's what I think we're all there.
That's the, I'm glad you said that.
This is how, okay, there's a lot of liberal people that get very upset about this topic, right?
Or they get very upset about Elon and what's happening.
It's unconstitutional.
Charlemagne was talking about that.
And you have a lot of like liberal politicians, liberal pundits talking about as well.
And I think the important thing to reflect on as well, I'm not saying don't talk about that, but the other thing to reflect on as well is we are so disillusioned with government and American institutions that we are willing to just see.
Do you know how desperate you got to be as a country where you're willing to just go, all right, let's try this.
Yeah.
If things were good for people, you would go, I don't want to risk it.
My life is pretty good.
I'm concerned if we do this, my life could get worse.
Yeah.
You know how many people got to be in a place where they're like, it can't get much worse to go, let's see.
Yeah, which I can understand the counterpoint.
I'm sure there's people at the end of the Weimar Republic that was like, yeah, let's just, let's just see.
Let's just see what's going on.
And then by the time you see that it's bad, it's too late.
Weimar Republic is what the end of right before Hitler takes over.
So like I can see people being like, oh, yeah, let's just wait and see.
Then after you see like, oh, this shit's fucked up, it's too late.
So I see the concern.
Some of the fear.
Sorry, I'm listening to some of these history podcasts now because sports has broken my heart and I'm looking for things to do.
But like when you hear about Caesar or Genghis Khan or whatever, and people are like, oh, this all Trump is doing the same things.
I do see how some of the things you're like, it reminds you of what's happening.
I don't think that's what's going to happen, but I understand the fear.
For Doge, I would say this is the first time we have heard and seen any politician that's president take actionable steps to, as far as I know, to reduce government spending.
Clinton did it, and I was too young to understand it probably.
Charlotte was far from here.
They fired 300,000 government workers under Clinton.
But he did it with bipartisan support.
So he did it through government.
And I think that was the big difference maker.
And during Clinton, it was the first time in all of our life.
Fucking surplus, right?
Where we had a surplus, which would be nice.
Yeah.
That would be really fucking nice.
I think Americans are so detached from our national debt.
We're like, that shit ain't mine.
That's the nation's debt, right?
We're so detached that the only thing we think about is the repercussions of that debt, which might be this super inflation, the cost of goods being crazy, interest wild, right?
So, but we got to knock that down to knock the rest of this down.
I think if you knock the debt down, mortgage rates come down, mortgage rates come down, the liquidity is out there.
There's more money on the streets.
Yeah.
Better for everybody.
So my feeling is like when I see the difference, when people are like, oh, like Julius Caesar or Hitler, dah, dah, dah.
I'm like, my hope is that the checks and balances within the U.S. government will be strong enough that if something goes too far, like Trump's like, yo, I'm dictator for life, that the checks will stop.
Yeah, that's what I have.
And I think that's the difference between where we are now and where we have been historically.
And so that's my hope.
And that's why I'm kind of a little bit more comfortable being like, yeah, it's just kind of like a lot of people.
Also, I think, I think we're go out going.
I think it's like, I agree with you, but I think it's also important to point out shit while it's happening.
Very fair.
Very fair.
Because like, if you just stay quiet and just let them do it, and then it might hit that point where it's you know.
That's its own check and balance.
Yeah, I'll say things.
First of all, since when do we push back on people checking the government?
Like, that's the most American thing to do.
But if it's the way that the way they talk, no, no, what I'm saying is if you listen to what I say, you out of here.
No, of course, of course.
Which is very un-American.
I think Americans will reject that.
But what I'm trying to say is right now you have people pushing back to what they believe is government overreach, right?
That is happening from the left to the right because the right is in power.
There was a time where the governments, where the right was pushing back against left government overreach during COVID.
Everybody go in your house.
You got to take the jab, et cetera.
We got to stop acting like we don't appreciate pushing back against government.
It's part of like our nation's identity.
Anytime we think that you're pushing a little too far, you're getting in my pockets, you're getting in my house, we push back.
So on a fundamental level, even if you're on the right, you should appreciate the left going, hey, government, back the fuck up, chill out.
Now, there's a part of you, if you're on the right, that goes, where the fuck was this energy when they were shoving shit in our arm that they don't know what the fuck it is?
But if you can step back for a second and be like, all right, maybe I don't agree with them, but I do respect their right to voice their opinion on this.
And I fundamentally agree with them pushing back against government overreach.
Like there is something you could connect on there.
I agree with you wholeheartedly, but then when you have the top-down person saying, if you don't do what the fuck I say, you're wait till midterms, you're out of here, or you're getting fired.
Like they're creating a climate where it's like, I don't want any talk back, and I don't want anybody doing anything I don't say.
Wait till midterms is, I think that's an important thing to distinguish.
Wait till midterms is your base is going to reject you because this is what your base wants.
It's not, well, Trump can't kick some.
If Trump was kicking out the senator of Maine or the governor of Maine or whatever the fuck it was, he would just do it now.
He doesn't have to wait till midterm.
No, that's not midterms.
They can just fund having somebody run against you and kick you the fuck out of it.
Okay.
That's politics.
Like, why would they not fund him already?
But it's so I think every elected official should speak for their constituents.
It shouldn't be, hey, you just have to follow what daddy says.
That's what they all do.
That's what the whip is.
That's what Nancy Pelosi does.
No, I get it.
But that's where the elected officials have to speak for the people.
Because if they do, it doesn't matter how much money you throw against them.
If you're actually speaking for your people and what they want, you will win.
Trump got less money.
Trump got way less money.
Do you know how much money they threw at the people going up against Trump?
Kamala got the record to the point that we all thought she was, oh, she might actually win just because of money.
It didn't matter.
So now we're in a situation where you're going to basically force government officials to actually care what their people want, not what the special interest groups want.
And if they're riding with these special interest groups, all of a sudden the Trump administration is going to go, it's interesting that they're really influenced by those big money donors and they're not caring about what you really care about, which is the cost of eggs and the inflation and the bloating government.
That's what we're going to care about.
And this is our guy and he's going to fix that for you.
That's on you as a politician for not knowing what your people want.
And calling back to the Clinton thing, this is another reason, even though I find him politically very fucking corny now, Elon, I don't have a problem with Doge.
Clinton was 32 years ago.
Like when we were, we were 90s kids.
That's great.
How far back was the 60s in our brain?
That's now.
That's the 90s now.
You know what I mean?
Like it's eight fucking elections.
Anyone did anything.
We just let it grow and grow.
It's 32 years of bloat.
We got to take it out.
And again, I'm not even just saying it because he's Indian.
It's part helps.
But like Vivek being like, hey, this needs to get cut, it clicked with me with like, yeah, I didn't even know Clinton did it.
But there's 32 years of bloat that just needs to get cut.
And we will overcome agreements.
And I'm okay there.
Now, Vivek's Vivek's plan was to do it using the Constitution.
Yes, which I prefer.
I think that probably would have been more digestible for the average, like politically inclined American.
Yep.
Because they couldn't really reject the.
They can't argue with the Constitution.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think Vivek has to do it.
It's quicker to do it.
Yeah.
It's quicker to do it the way Elon.
Yeah.
And there's a risky strategy, though.
Because if it bombs, the Democrats are going to win the next four elections.
So you got to hope that the first shit you do just like slaps.
I think Trump sided with the money with Elon, and I think they pushed the wrong guy out.
That's personally what I feel.
Yeah.
I think Vivek would have, it would have, and it would have overcorrected for sure.
But like, by the Constitution, can't really argue with it.
It's going to be some uproar, but we'll cut some of that stuff.
I love Vivek.
But it's hard to go up against the Rockets.
Of course, of course, of course.
It's just so he's so impressive.
The richest man in the world.
Yeah, bro.
Yeah, but it's, I mean, if we had to hire, I'm trying to think of a job I wouldn't hire Elon for.
I wouldn't hire him to watch my kids.
You see the clip of him forgetting his kid at the thing?
Just straight walking off, baby.
Son Kardashian done that shit.
Oh, okay.
Elon Elm.
Okay.
Great mother of here.
Oh my gosh.
All right.
I wouldn't have him take your job.
I think FA Center Pod World.
Here he is.
This shit was on here every single week.
So he just left his kid, bro.
Pull it up.
This shit is so funny.
He's busy, bro.
He's trying to cut.
He's trying to cut.
He's like, I got 13 of these little motherfuckers too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's trying to make more of them.
That is wild.
Look at the kid.
Look how far back the kid is, dog.
Now, people did post a full video where, like, he's like, come on, little buddy, let's go.
He's like, woo.
And then he goes downstairs.
And he keeps on saying bye.
His little homie's going slow.
He doesn't realize he got shorter legs.
And he's like, oh, come on, little bit.
It's not as bad.
That's not as bad.
See, this is fake news.
Yeah.
This is the perfect example.
I got fake force.
I got fake news.
Nah, that's fucked up.
I still wouldn't have him watch my kid, though.
Yeah, he's busy.
I want you working on it.
Yeah, dude.
So we're going to see.
How long do you think it is before we feel some of the negative or positive effects of the cuts?
I think short-term will feel more pain.
I think.
I just think in general, a lot of the ideas are going to cause some short-term pain for long-term gain.
I think it's going to be so hard to tell.
I literally think it's going to be like a Rorschach.
Let's say prices come down for everything.
Like, depending on how ink blot shit where you see what you feel already.
Like, I wonder if people on the left will see all the media.
Like, they cut this thing and there's a teacher that died.
And then the homeless thing got worse.
And even if the price of things are coming down, they'll be like, yeah, this country's going to shit.
And then people on the right, let's say prices don't move at all, but then they're seeing all these headlines that are like, everything's great.
We're saving all this money.
The budget's at a surplus.
See, it works.
I think the like, I don't even, like, I think media will just manipulate people's minds, but it'll just say like whatever the thing they're feeding is.
And I think it'll be dependent on whatever they're considering.
I think it all depends on how the economy is and if people feel like they have money in their pockets.
I think it all comes at the end.
How do you make people feel that?
Like, what does create a thriving economy?
Either low inflation or stimmy checks.
But like, for example, how would you like, how do you address inflation?
My understanding is the way that you address inflation is you restrict or is or constrict the money supply, right?
If there's less, there's less money out there, if there are more, if there's more money than there are things to buy, the price of things is just crazy.
Yeah, I think it's called the you're trying to slow the liquidity of money through monetary policy.
Yeah.
So the only way to do that is to keep interest rates high.
But if you keep interest rates high, it stifles economic growth because you need liquidity for growth.
So it's a really fucked up thing.
It's almost like you need to just plunder another country to take all their wealth.
Yeah.
That worked back in the day.
Who should we pretend has nukes?
I think we need to look into Canada.
Canada got nukes.
Canada does have trucks.
Who knows?
This whole cut thing was a front and he's actually building tons of people.
Where do you think he got the nukes from?
His dad.
Cuba.
So he's got the nukes shipped in.
So you got to keep an eye on him.
51st state.
Is there any country rich enough where we could just plunder that bitch?
Yeah, Canada.
There's at Drake's house.
That's why it's called the embassy.
We need to get in there.
We need to really just take things apart.
And yeah, that's ours now.
A couple meme coins, some rug pulls.
Like, we'll get it right anyway.
USA coin rug pulls in the fire.
No, but I think, yeah, the stimmy check doesn't work.
That's what caused the inflation.
So I think, I don't know.
To me, I just remember, and this is everybody's going to be personal.
It's like, I remember Bill Clinton, I was eight years old.
My dad went from having no job.
We opened a business.
I was like, oh, in this four years, it seems like we're doing better.
And I remember I'm 10, so I know nothing, but I'm like, yeah, this guy Bill Clinton seems to be doing a good job.
And that was also during like the big, the first tech boom, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Which may be the only reason it happened.
I don't know.
But that's, we just go off what we're feeling.
Corporate Responsibility Debated00:10:52
I also think corporate greed is like probably, it's probably the biggest factor.
It's a problem.
Like, I think we just so concerned with how the stocks, like how things are going in the stock market.
And so we're squeezing, we're squeezing like the lower and middle class like as much as possible.
And we have no power to say anything.
So because power to make change.
If you squeeze, when you say squeeze the lower and middle class, you mean like by paying them less, we can show more profits or the corporate price goes.
And then the stock price goes up.
My responsibility is to my shareholder.
Yeah.
That's not that fucking line.
You can hide behind for some shit I just saw.
DoorDash got sued for like 20 million because they were taking people's tips and using that money to pay the wages of wow.
So fucked up.
That's crazy.
And so when they say 100% of the money goes towards the delivery person, they're still not lying.
Yeah.
That's fucked up.
Wow.
I mean, that's what restaurants do, right?
Like restaurants, I think minimum wage is like $15 an hour in some states now, but restaurants will pay you $3 an hour because they count your tips as part of your wage.
At least you know that going into it.
Like, DoorDash was like, oh, no, you didn't get any tips than just using that money to pay their delivery people.
Yeah, that is fucked up because we know that the waiters aren't making any money outside of tips.
You got to get it out.
Thank you, my boy.
I got it.
Yeah.
So we, and so they, so we overcompensate.
Yeah.
But with DoorDash, you're just giving them whatever y'all give.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ooh.
And that's the thing.
All these corporations are doing similar shit like that.
Amazon workers, like they barely get paid.
Have you spoken to Uber drivers recently?
No.
So like a lot of the Uber drivers when they first started, Uber was taking like 15%, 20%.
Now that shit has come up to like 30, 40 in certain places.
Dude, I'll see you.
Sometimes I'll ask an Uber driver, what'd you get for this?
And it will be less than half of what I paid, like considerably less.
Wow.
Like six bucks for a $25 Uber or whatever.
So basically what they did is they lost money to gain market share.
And that is the strategy of these like tech businesses now, right?
Maybe businesses in general now.
But so they don't have to show profit at all.
And they'll lose money as long as the stock is cooking.
But what happens is what you're saying is that all these people that are driving are eventually going to go, you know what?
I got to now work 80 hours a week to make what I used to make driving a taxi 40 hours or 60 hours, whatever the fuck they would do.
And they got no voice.
They got no lobbyists.
They have no lobby.
They have no health insurance.
And it's, I mean, I guess it's not a monopoly.
They are.
There is Lyft, but Lyft is also going to cook you as well.
That's an airline shit too, where it's like, y'all pretend you're competing.
You're not.
There's a certain level below which you know you're not going to go.
And this is what it is.
It's like they're both in coaches.
It's like, yeah, let's get these prices, oligopoly or whatever it's called, which is like two guys control legal.
Yeah.
But it's going on.
How are you going to prove it?
Yeah.
And then you can imagine some driver has been out of the workforce for four years, five years, immigrant, doesn't have work experience or whatever.
Like, where else is he going to go?
Where else?
So you're like, yeah, I'll just eat it.
Yeah.
And like, even partly with my business, I see that.
Like, I made it a point to like overpay because I've always been in production and I'm like, you know what?
Like, let me change things that bothered me back in the day.
And that does stifle growth.
Like, I, because I pay my employees really well, I can't open as many studios as I would like to.
I have to wait till we, you know, build it up.
And now we can.
So it's like, I see what would motivate a business owner to pay less because I can grow my shit way faster.
But at the same time, it's like you just have to have zero empathy for people.
And that shit sucks.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's easy for me.
I don't know.
And then the people with no empathy like rise to the top.
Yeah.
True.
You know what I mean?
Like all these like corporate CEOs are just like cutthroat.
And they're like, yeah, I'm good.
I'm fine.
I can sleep at night.
I'm good on that.
Yeah.
And also you get better work.
I think when people feel like they're properly compensated, they build their identity around the job.
It's hard to build your identity around a job where you feel taken advantage of.
But if you create the job where they don't have to have an identity, it's like an assembly line and people just come in and you're like, all right, you don't like it?
Yep.
See you later.
If you make them easily replaceable, Uber, Amazon, all these places.
Yeah.
Dude, I've had Amazon employees tell me like they'll get hurt on the job, but they're afraid to go get medical care or whatever because they're going to get in trouble.
So they just keep working.
They're afraid to get replaced by a robot or whatever.
They just keep working.
That bathroom breaks get timed.
I mean, that's nutless.
I mean, you're not going to be able to do that first day.
I'm the reason why that exists.
I'm taking 30 minutes.
How are you getting hurt at the Amazon factory?
The warehouse.
Oh, the warehouse.
Yeah.
Putting the thing in the box.
Yeah, lifting boxes, probably doing all this shit.
Machinery going everywhere.
It's fucking forklifts.
Yeah.
You're going to get hurt.
Yeah.
That shit sucks.
But corporations are fire, though.
You know what I mean?
They really do make some great shit.
They're just fire, bro.
No, order something that comes in the next day.
They keep making it.
They make it so convenient.
And this is where we're kind of fucked or like we're trapped into it.
Are you ever calling not lift or Uber?
Like going out, grabbing a taxi?
So we're all like, this is what happens.
They make a better product.
So we're like, yeah, sure.
And you're removed enough from that person that you're like, well, I don't really, I can't care that they're getting fucked.
It's just convenient for me.
And that's what it is.
I'm not.
And that's a disagreement with you.
That's why, and I remember it was actually Vivek's book I was reading where he was like, every corporation's fiduciary responsibility is to the shareholders.
And I was like, that is a fucking thing, huh?
That's what they all hide behind.
Oh, I don't have to care about the employee.
My responsibility is to my shareholder.
That line in and of itself is just such a like catch-all for having to give a fuck about anyone below me.
Yeah.
Dude, it's a good point made there, Mark, about if you can create a business with replaceable employees, you really don't have to care about your employees at all.
Yeah.
And those businesses don't.
Yeah.
And they're incredibly profitable.
I think it's the Henry Ford thing.
I think he did that with like the assembly line.
Yeah.
I'm just like.
No, but his initially, the idea with the, with the, maybe this is propaganda, but the idea was I want everybody that works here to be able to afford the car.
Oh, that is true.
Yeah.
Now that could be Henry Ford Association going, all right, let's not make him look like a fucking animal, make him look like he cares about the workers.
But that was the idea that they could make a car cheap enough that the people that worked at the plant could drive one.
And if that is the case, imagine you're working at a fucking plant and you're driving to work every single day.
You must feel like the fucking man.
Yeah.
And you pride.
There's a lot of pride there.
And also, like, when you look at, especially in, it's Detroit, right?
Where the General Motors were, or at least Michigan.
Michigan.
Right?
Like, you would have like generations of families work at those plants and be proud of it.
Like they were proud to be part of that community.
And then when those plants left, it was devastating.
But I guess that was a time where like the cost of goods and wage was more similar.
And then now it's like, yeah, that was also when corporate greed was at, no, I don't want to say it was at a low.
It was lower.
There was, but it's like they didn't know how greedy they could get.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, okay.
So again.
Difference between like CEO pay and the workers pay wasn't as the gap wasn't.
And what's the justification for that now?
I know.
I don't know the justification.
I know when it really started to go crazy was we fought to have CEO salaries made public because we were like, we want to see how overpaid these people are.
But then it's like NBA contracts.
You see what they're making and you're like, oh, you need to pay me more than that.
Oh, you need to pay me more than that.
You need to pay me more than.
And then it just goes bang, bang, bang.
Because NBA, NFL, a lot of times it's not about how much I make.
It's about, I need to make more than that guy.
And it's how much he makes.
So once you start making these contracts public, and I'm a, yeah, I don't know how you get that genie back in the bottle or whatever, but like that inflated it a lot.
Yeah.
You don't get it back in the bottom.
Just capitalism, people are like, you can't tell me how much I deserve to be paid for this.
And everybody thinks, oh, one day that's going to be me.
And I don't want somebody telling me how much I can get paid.
All right, questions.
There's less pushback.
Is just shoot these motherfuckers.
That's all on it.
No, but it's like certain industries.
Luigi got that right idea, yo.
But is like the skill of certain CEOs.
Like, for example, like what's Steve Jobs, right?
Yeah.
Like, whatever he got paid, he deserved it.
Like, he transformed an industry, transformed the world in a lot of ways.
Yeah.
Right.
So you can't really put a dollar amount on him, like what he's worth to the company.
Like, are certain, are these certain CEOs, like, are they worth these exorbitant amount of money, this exorbitant amount of money, because that's what they bring to the brand?
Certain, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm sure that's what they would argue.
And again, it's like the NBA.
LeBron is worth 100 million a year or whatever.
But I guess what I'm trying to like LeBron, it's so easy to see because he's 6'9.
He got the handle like a point guard.
He's got vision.
He could shoot.
He's obviously proven winner.
I think with the CEOs, a lot of times we look at them outside of like a jobs or a musk and we're just like, oh, it's just like a white guy who wears a suit and he just tells people what to do.
Like, do they have these distinguishable skills?
Maybe if we knew more about what they're actually doing for a company, maybe it would seem more justifiable to us.
Yeah.
Maybe, does that make sense?
Like, maybe they are LeBron-esque in how unique their skill set is.
But even though, like, what Elon does for Tesla, Elon could be like, hey, we can make less profits this year and pay all of our employees more.
And every company can do that.
Got it.
And you're the share price goes down.
Yeah.
Our responsibility is to the shareholders.
Yeah.
Blah, blah, blah.
So the share price goes down because it's not.
That's why food, and this is why, again, I don't think food should be publicly traded.
That's why food, they're like, oh, I can put all these chemicals in it for less cost than the real ingredients of Cheetos.
It'll drive the cost down.
The share price goes up for Frito-Lay.
That's who my responsibility is.
Corporate buyouts happen.
A big company comes in, buys a small like mom tops thing that's very popular.
They figure out how they can cut costs.
They fire certain people.
They put different chemicals or make the product worse in a certain way, but small enough that it's not that noticeable.
The product is then cheaper to produce and the company can go, look what we did.
We year over year, we're 50% better, 24% better.
Quarter over quarter, we're increasing profits.
Yeah.
So it's just one of the downsides of like unfettered capitalism.
Like you just need some type of legislation to like protect it so that it can still grow, but then to not, you know, like, yeah, you don't want to over-legislate it, but also you need to keep some guardrails, guardrails to stop, you know, monopolies.
Philanthropy As Money Laundering00:05:23
This is where it's a push and pull.
Like unions, some would say that the car unions got so powerful.
That's why American cars started to get worse.
Japanese cars were taking over and then Ford ends up shutting down, et cetera, et cetera.
Now, I'm not saying that's what the answer, but it is, it just, I think, has to be a constant push and pull.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, Rockefeller beat the whole game.
Literally, he would just like create standard oil, got so big, and then we'll just go into towns with other oil companies and be like, so you can either sell to us for 50% of what you're worth, or we'll just take over your area when we open up a standard oil right here because we have so much funding and we have such a great assembly line that we'll just take you over.
So what do you want to do?
And then he just like steamrolled everyone and literally broke capitalism.
And then we're like, all right, we got to put it.
Yeah, then we broke up standard oil in 1910 or whatever.
And then we're like, all right, we got, we can't just let this rule the world.
How did he deal with that emotionally?
I know you were reading that biography.
Yeah, Titan.
And did he have any kind of like turmoil about doing that to people?
Did he feel justified in some way?
I mean, yes and no.
He was just like, these are the rules of the game.
And he was like a super strict business guy.
Like he counted every penny in his personal bank account.
Like in his journals, he would have like a ledger of like every single dollar that was going in and out.
So, like, on the one hand, he was ruthless, but on the other hand, he was like super philanthropic, opened all these like HBCUs, like Spelman College, like a famous HBCU, was named after his wife, Setty Spelman.
So, he like opened up all these like black universities.
He's like, Yeah, we got to like give black.
White, black, no, she's white lately, hilarious.
Yeah, and he was like, We got to support like black people in America and like give people opportunity.
So, like, I think he kind of justified it through like philanthropic stuff.
The cynic in me is like, Yo, let's just keep shit segregated.
I'll just open for school for that a little bit.
Wait, we got all these workers that don't know how to fucking mine oil.
Let's fucking do an oil mining class.
Oh, fuck, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I wonder if that's what if that's what charity is to some of these incredibly wealthy people.
If it's just a way to like get to heaven, like it's a way to offset the greed, yeah.
I do think he was also religious because I think he was like, Dude, God gave me this.
Like, this is ordained by God.
You justify your fuck shit by this is what God wanted me to do, and then you do some good on the side as a token of your gratitude in a way.
Yes, yeah, yeah, because sometimes I do feel like people, and we should do more philanthropy, we should figure out how we can, how we can give back.
Y'all should, but we got you here, you know, no, but but we should figure out how we can give back, but give back in a way where it doesn't feel like sometimes I see people doing it and it feels so like um self-aggrandizing.
You know, like I like, I don't know if the money is actually trickling to the charity, yeah.
It feels almost more of like a pat on the back, like a public display of I'm a good person, and this is why you guys should believe I'm a good person, but then people aren't actually getting helped.
But not everything, oh, sorry, you go.
This is just happening right now.
There's a lot of CEOs that are basically like doing the Rockefeller thing where they create a nonprofit foundation, and that nonprofit foundation is actually not funding.
It's sort of like a money laundering place.
And then they put their kids as the presidents and CEOs of that foundation, and they get a salary, and that salary is half a million dollars a year.
So now you're finding a way to funnel money to your kids through this nonprofit.
And some of them do great, some of them really do great, and some people have done great.
Rockefeller did great at the end, like Bill Gates has stopped hookworm, kinny worm, something.
Like, there's a lot of them that have done great, but there are some that are using it sort of as well.
I'm sure there are plenty that do good things.
But I wonder if it and not everything is money.
Like, I have classes come to WTF and like I just talk to the kids and shit like that.
And you never know, that might just open their mind, help them see something like throw a fucking benefit show where just like underprivileged people able to come to show for free.
That's the way to not give money.
I'm just saying, not everything's about money.
No, you're right.
You're right.
There's a lot of times influence is going to be way more impactful.
And I also wonder if trying to solve the biggest problem isn't the most effective way of doing your charity.
So, like, small things.
That's the thing.
That's the thing where I think Portnoy does brilliantly, like going to a specific place and giving them money to stay open.
Like, we are saving this restaurant.
We're not going, hey, we're going to save the restaurant industry.
That's a nice thing on paper.
That looks really good.
You get to pat yourself on the back.
And maybe some people in the world are like, look at how benevolent that human being is.
But going to one mom and pop shop, speaking to the mom and pop and saving their business, maybe it saved it for a year.
Maybe it saved for two years.
Maybe it saved it for 20.
Who fucking knows?
But I wonder if that's the most direct impact you can have.
That starfish story you ever heard that?
No, it's like my dad told me this when I was a kid.
It was like all these starfish roll up on the sea after like or on the shore after a like a big storm.
Some kids throwing them back in the ocean.
And some guy comes up.
He's like, dude, there's thousands of starfish.
Like, what are you doing?
Doesn't make a difference.
And he takes a starfish, throws in the water, and goes, made a difference to that one.
That's kind of a cute little story.
But it kind of goes to that point.
Like, yeah, just finding specific people that need help and then helping them in that way.
Yeah.
It's also more fulfilling on a personal basis.
Yeah.
Do feel good after.
Yeah.
100%.
Yeah.
You're not going to feed all the African kids.
You know what I mean?
Let's just feed some Africans here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Take an Uber drive.
Be like, yo, just go to the fucking drive-thru.
Patreon Hypnosis Discussion00:08:29
Whatever you want.
Whatever you want.
Yeah.
Fucking ring it up.
Yeah.
Feed some of Elon's African kids.
Yeah, exactly, dude.
Yeah, there's something.
Are we getting commie pilled right now?
We're getting.
Dude, we got to stop this.
Wait, are we commies?
Yeah, I'm not going to stand for this commie talk.
All right.
Hey, Mark, you're lying on hypnosis.
What's going on with this?
I'm reading one book on hypnosis.
This is weird.
It's not weird.
First off, I just want to learn the secrets.
All right.
The secret teachings of hypnosis.
Why would you want to learn that?
Let's talk about this on Patreon.
Okay.
One slight reason is I'm genuinely curious if hypnosis is real.
Yeah.
So like, do you believe in hypnosis?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you think that people can be put into a subconscious state where their mind is now controlled by another person?
Some people.
Blacks.
Okay.
Why is it blacks?
It's not why.
It's not black.
Mine is better.
Oh, really?
Smarter people are apparently easier to hypnotize.
Just as they tell dumb people who they hypnotize.
I'm going to hypnotize Al.
I'm going to come back one of these days.
I'm going to hypnotize him.
Maybe on Patreon.
Mark, I would like you to hypnotize our audience right now.
Okay.
And tell them to come join us at Patreon.
Yeah, absolutely.
Use everything you've learned.
Don't tell us.
You need something to wave in front of something long you can wave in front of their faces to can I unplug Al, would you mind pulling your dick up?
No, no, no, you guys should join us on Patreon, okay?
It's only like two dollars a month or something.
Yeah, that's what it is.
Is that hypnotism?
Hypnosis is lying to people.
Yeah, I think it's lying.
Just a used car salesman.
Is that what hypnosis is?
Exactly.
Yeah, that's basically it.
Yeah, but you can see this on Patreon where I'm going to hypnotize Al.
I'll see you guys there.
Fuck out of here.
Yo, Al's hypnotized that he's 5'11.
Oh, yo, did we show that yet?
No, we're about to show you.
I've been a fan and a Patreon member for a long, long time.
And now I just want to know, let's get the tape measures out.
Let's get this height debacle situated.
Let's see what the actual heights are for the whole crew.
Let's do it.
I'm down for this.
My height on Google is like 5'4.
Anyways, I love y'all, peace.
Let's fucking do it.
I'll do that right now.
We got a tape measure.
Yeah, I know.
Let's close out the episode with your fucking shoes off.
We don't got a tape, man.
Take your fucking shoes.
Stop, We're not doing that.
We're not doing that today.
Guys, this video feeling Patreon.
Patreon.com slash fucking phony.
You know, for the vibes and all that.
You're a phony.
I hate this guy.
I mean, I'm backing a bee.
Nah, we could.
Al 5'4, yo.
No, because honestly, it's good for you because I call you 5'4 so much that they're starting to believe it.
I don't care, but it has to be some mystery in it that I could keep lying.
All right, I'll go.
Let's go.
I'll talk.
How long is it?
More than five feet?
I took my shoes off.
Here we go.
I'm going to stand up straight.
No tiptoes.
Here you go.
Top of the head.
Let's go.
Oh, it's tall enough for you, Al.
There you go.
Do what you got to do, buddy.
What's up, camera?
Are we on the wide chat mouse?
Is this an honest measurement here?
I think so.
Is my chin solid?
Yeah, you're live.
You're live.
Okay, good.
I think I think it'd say like 67.
5'7.
7.
Like I said, yo.
Like I said.
Yeah.
5'7.
Okay, all right.
All right, okay.
Okay, hold on.
What do you need from me?
I'm like, we're gonna do this honestly.
I'm not gonna fuck with you, Al.
Let's do this right here.
What do we have?
Shoes off, but he's got long pants.
Look if you stand on a stone.
Yo, this is so funny.
Tell me what that is.
Tell me what that is right there.
What is it?
65.
No, no, no.
It's 68.
What's that?
You're 5'8, yo.
No, no, no.
60 and a half million.
No, it's not.
You're not 5'9.
He's not 5'9.
No, it's not.
It might be.
Did you have that on cam?
It might be 5'9.
No, he wasn't.
It might be 5'5'9.
Yo, come back.
Come back.
Take it.
Okay, all right, hold on, bro.
Let's go.
Go straight.
Straighten that shit up.
Yeah, I think six.
You're five, eight and a half, though.
No, stop it.
You're five, nine.
Five, nine.
We'll take it.
We'll take what you'll take.
We'll take it.
Yeah.
It's winter time.
You shrink a little bit.
You know, it's right.
That's a good point.
That's a good point.
That's what I'm saying.
You can posture it on.
You do contract a little bit.
God damn it.
It's winter time.
You shrink a little bit.
Yo, I'm being dead ass all this time.
He's giving you 5'9.
You're barely 5'9.
Barely 5'9.
You're a hater.
I'm a real 6'7.
This makes me feel fake 5'9.
This makes me feel bad.
I didn't know my actual height for years.
I've been lying to myself saying I'm 5'10 and a half.
You know what?
I stopped lying about my height because there was a girl that I was talking to in college, and I was like, I'm 5'9.
She was like, No, the fuck, you're not.
My license says I'm 5'9.
And she was like, You're not 5'9.
And then I measured myself.
Thank God, not in front of her, but I was 5'7.
I was like, This bitch got me.
Yo, wow.
Can I ask one more thing?
Yeah.
Yo, David, I know you're listening to this shit.
Get in here so I can measure you.
Wait, is he?
Oh, he said he's 6'5.
He's demonstrating.
David Sanchez, come in here.
Oh, where's Dub?
Oh, I am.
This is 5'10.
Get dubbed.
Get in here.
Get in here.
Dove, we need you right now.
I said I'm 5'10.
I'm the only one honest about this.
I'm gonna expose everybody.
Yo, real shit.
From one fat guy to another.
You can hold it.
I'll hold it at the bottom.
Okay.
All right, here we go.
Ready?
And then if you're gonna talk, talk to the bad.
Okay, all right.
Yeah, yeah.
All right, David, let's go.
It's gonna be 5'10 on the nose.
All right, let's straighten it out.
You know what?
What is that?
Damn it.
You gotta move.
Son, 60, 90s.
You're 5'9, too, dog.
Why?
Oh, you're not.
No, no.
Short.
Hey, Dove.
Dove.
Bro, he's looking at the table.
Get in here, buddy.
Yo, I feel so what's vindicated.
Get in here.
Drag him, drag.
That was 5'9, right, Miles?
I'm not bullshitting.
Yep, stand right here.
I don't believe it.
Shoes off.
I'm busy.
Shoes off.
Nope, Shoes off.
Shoes off.
Dub.
You gotta measure your height.
Everybody lies except me.
Yep.
Shoes off.
I'm fat and 5'7.
I am what I am.
I'm a real one.
Yeah, yeah.
Everybody's getting exposed today.
This episode is taking the best.
Okay, yo.
Oh, you're Dove.
I'm your mic.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, your hand almost grazed my dick there, John.
So, yeah, hold up.
Yo, your chin right here, buddy.
I'm gonna lower your chin.
I'm gonna lower your chin right there.
There you go.
That's straight.
Wait, wait, wait.
That's straight right there.
I'm gonna call him.
Hold your head.
You're still bending it.
Is it straight enough?
Now it is.
What are you saying?
Miles is 70.
70.
What's that?
5'10.
5'10.
Hey!
Hey, guys!
5'10.
Hey, Patreon.
Everybody's a liar except your boy.
And let's like Trump.
There's no way.
5'10, bro.
How many times this pod I said, I'm 5'7?
All the time, right?
It's a punchline.
Who's the only one that was honest?
This guy been saying he's six feet.
Yeah.
David wanted me.
He's Mexican.
Alex is saying he's 5'11.
He said 5'11.
I said 5'10 and a half.
What a liar.
5'11.
He's 5'9.
He's 5'8' and 3-quarters.
Mark, I believe you're six feet.
No, I'm 5'9.
Miles, I believe you're six.
You're 5'11.
Oh, you're 5'11.
Miles is honest.
That's an easy roundup.
That's looking so crazy.
I actually think Miles is six foot.
Miles, get your ass in here.
That's such a tough.
I think Miles is under 200 pounds.
Get the stand.
I think he's six foot.
Maybe that is true.
I didn't pick up on something you would do, right?
That's something you would do: say I'm 5'11, I'm six feet.
There's Bell Doni vibes.
He's like, I don't want to overestimate.
You know what I mean?
It's a humiliation.
You're what Bell Doni pretends to be.
Oh, I'm so happy about this.
Guys, I cannot think of a better way to.
I didn't even say something like Dick Ricky.
I know this word.
It's worse.
I believe the lie that I've been telling myself for years.
We've been putting this on the public episode.
Years I believed this lie.
I'm so happy.
Guys, this is what we're leading the fucking public episode off with.
Patreon, thank you guys so much for being here as we tell the truth and we expose people.