Ralph Barbosa addresses his conflict with George Lopez, contrasting generational comedy styles and revealing his family's past drug dealing in Dallas. The discussion shifts to viral fame versus traditional circuits, conspiracy theories about Elon Musk and Islam Makachev, and a debate on Ja Rule versus 50 Cent. Hosts then analyze train crash poison claims, The Last of Us survival strategies, and post-apocalyptic bases like aircraft carriers, concluding that human conflict remains the true threat over zombies. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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George Lopez Replaced by Ralph00:14:51
He called me.
He's like, hey, Ralph, this is George, man, George Lopez.
My first words was like, what the f ⁇ ?
What's up, everybody?
Welcome to Flagrant.
And today, we are sitting down with the new voice of Cats and Dogs.
George Lopez has been replaced by Ralph Barbosa.
Gats and Dogs 4.
Ralph is the new.
I'm assuming it's Chihuahua.
Maybe it's a different dog.
I'm not exactly certain.
Ralph, why are you stirring up so much shit with the OGs, man?
La Rosa.
Why are you doing that, dude?
Yeah.
Possible, pero locos, way.
This is like, oh, my God.
This is like saying, like, a Mexican's worst enemy is another Mexican.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
And it's true.
I don't like these Mexicans.
Bro, we agree on so much, bro.
We agree.
Come on, bro.
Okay.
Listen, obviously there's this beef.
Everybody's going around.
I don't even know if it's beef.
I don't think so.
No, this is fun.
I thought it was fine.
Thought it was fine for real?
Yeah.
I mean, you did put a video out where you were killing him.
Yeah.
I put out the edited version.
I have a director's cut.
I just thought it was funny because I like that movie La Carlito's Way.
And I like the thought of taking out the old dudes.
But the reason that I put that video up was because I just started being on the road.
And every now and then, somebody will be like, you're the next George Lopez.
Even before this George Lopez thing, my response was already like, yo, fuck George Lopez.
Oh, really?
Whenever somebody would yell that from the audience or any Latino comedian, they throw out, whoever their idols were, I was like, fuck your idols.
But when that thing came out, I was just like, oh, this is pretty.
This is like what I've been saying.
Was that a real sentiment or just I'm trying to get a laugh on stage when they say it?
Or was your brain really like, yo, I'm coming for it.
Fuck all these guys?
Nah, I wasn't really like coming for them.
It's just that when they would name them, I'm like, I don't know.
Sometimes it's a funny thing to say on stage.
Yeah, it's a funny thing to say.
I just think it's funny that they're just like assuming I like looked up to George Lopez.
That's the thing I was, I wanted to ask you when you came up because you're 26.
Yeah.
I'm 39.
Yeah.
And I felt I was young when I was watching George Lopez.
Yeah.
So I wasn't watching.
I don't think you ever grew up watching him.
Even when I was watching them, I was like, I don't get it.
Oh, come on.
Nah, that motherfucker is hilarious.
That's hate, bro.
That's hate, bro.
It was good to say.
That was good hate.
You got to give it up for that hate.
Yo, watch me.
You got your chain on your head.
You didn't think he was funny.
Like, yeah, he's funny, but I didn't think he was like, I'm not going to like, yo, man, I want to watch this George Lopez special or like, oh, a fucking show is going to come on.
Like, I would hear people quote him all the time.
Yeah.
And I'm like, yo, I got to see that one day.
And then when I did it, I'm like, yeah, that's so funny.
My chest.
Yeah, like that.
I don't know.
This is what it is.
It's like comedy.
You need comedy within the context of time because this is how I felt about Pryor because I saw Eddie first.
So everybody would tell me, oh my God, Pryor's the truth.
He's the greatest ever.
And I grew up on Eddie.
So when I saw Pryor, I was like, nah, he's not fucking with Eddie.
Yeah, I feel that.
This feels like, I know this feels, it's like blasphemy almost to say, this feels like a less funny version of this guy who is the king for me.
So you're coming up.
And also comedy's changing.
Like, I imagine when George was putting out that first special, this is like, this is the first time Mexicans are seeing a guy relate and share their experiences in a comedic way, especially on fucking HBO.
So they're seeing other guys.
They're seeing rock.
They're seeing Carlin.
They're seeing all these other dudes.
And finally, it's like, oh, shit.
Yeah, he's talking that thing that I've experienced.
Whereas you're watching it and you've seen all these jokes played out for 20 or 30 years by different people, different versions.
So, but if you go back to it, you go, yo, there's better versions of all these takes.
Yeah, I guess so.
I don't know.
I didn't like it.
It wasn't like huge into stand-up growing up, though.
Yeah.
And if I was watching stand-up, I was watching whoever came on TV around that time.
Yeah.
So it was like Comedy Central.
So it was a lot of like, of like Chappelle's thing or like Patrice O'Neill's like stuff, like reruns of their type of stuff or clips or whatever.
And by the time I did see like a George Lopez clip or something like that, I just remember he kept saying like stuff like Latinos, you know us.
And I like, that was like the corniest line in the world to me.
For anybody to say like, you know us, man.
We get down.
Or like, it was just like, I don't know.
I couldn't get into it.
To this point.
So not saying it's not funny.
I just couldn't get into it.
George Lopez side now.
Fuck these young kids, bro.
This is.
George does say that in the podcast.
It's almost like, it's like when young dudes look at the rap OGs and the rap seems so simple and they're just a hip hop a hibbit.
You know what I'm saying?
And you're just like, what the fuck?
That's what I'm watching.
Yeah, that sort of feels like I'm watching George.
Yes.
But at the time, that Dr. Seuss shit was fire.
I bet.
Yeah.
Not to say he's not funny.
Like, yeah, he's funny as fuck.
It's just like, I'm not going to watch him.
To his point, you were like three when the George Lopez show came on the air.
You were like five or six when the special came out.
So that thing back then, to his point, it's like when Indians, when we saw Russell, I'm old enough to like see the beginning.
I really felt exactly like what he said.
Like, yo, we've never heard anybody talking to us.
Holy fuck, I'm so happy.
This is so funny.
Young kids coming up now watching that are going to be like, yo, there's 100 Indian comics.
This one, he's doing this simple thing.
It's like, no, back then, that was it.
That was the only thing.
And George, back then, nobody was talking to them.
George was a Mexican comedian.
Your comedian is Mexican.
Okay.
I see it.
Do you know what I'm saying?
But you needed a Mexican comedian.
So that I could be a comedian that's Mexican.
Yes.
You know, because you're not going up there like, I got to tell you everything about being Mexican today.
You ready?
Yeah.
Somebody already told him.
You know us Mexicans, man.
Yeah.
Now I do, actually.
Now I do.
George Lopez, now I get it.
That's why you don't have it because now we know.
Dead ass.
We're like, we know Mexicans now because George Lopez taught us.
Nah, and he's like, nice.
I'm telling you, the dude called me after that whole thing he said.
I wasn't mad when he said it.
Yeah.
Because I'm telling you, I have a whole lot of respect for him still.
I'm not, when he said it, I'm not like, oh, what the fuck?
Like, heard about it.
But I also wasn't like, oh, yeah, who cares?
It just was like, it's a fucking podcast.
You're talking shit.
Yeah.
So what if he said it?
You know what I mean?
Like, he doesn't know me.
So like, it's his.
He knows you, my boy.
But it's his podcast.
Like, you don't say I don't know somebody five times unless you know.
Well, yeah, he called me and he was like super cool.
I was kind of like starstruck by it, to be honest, because I wasn't expecting it.
How did he call it?
Was he like, like, what shot?
Tell me about the call.
He was just like, he's like, hey, Ralph, this is George, man.
George Lopez.
I was like, I want her to call him to apologize.
And my first words was like, what the fuck?
And I was like, my bad, man.
I didn't mean to be like rude or nothing.
It's just like, damn, it's kind of caught me off guard, you know, that he's even calling me.
And he was just like, yeah, man.
He's like, I just, I was kind of like in the heat of the moment where they're just kind of shooting the shit with Trevino and kind of fired up about it.
But I didn't mean to like talk badly about you or anything like that.
Like, just kind of talking shit, you know?
Like, but I apologize.
I was like, you didn't have to, man.
I was like, I appreciate that a lot.
Like, you really didn't have to, you know, it's not like bugging me like that.
He was like, no, no, no.
He's like, I did.
I had to, whatever.
He's like, that's decent, though, that he didn't do a public apology.
Yeah, I wouldn't have, I don't think it had to be public at all.
A lot of people online were like, fucking, you slander him in public.
You apologize in public.
Like, nah, bro.
Like, then it would have looked like he's just doing it for the people.
Not for you.
Yeah, he's just like, he's like, comics, comic man to man.
He's like, I just want to apologize, man.
He's like, you got my number.
If you ever did need help with anything, you got my number now.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, that's cool as fuck.
You're going to take him up on that?
See if he's about it?
I'll probably wait till I'm like in a really tough jam.
Yeah.
Murder trial.
I'm like, yo.
George that time.
He was cool.
It's that Steve Trevino guy.
I'm starting to think he's the bad guy in the list.
It is weird with the OGs.
I think that like, and again, you're a few generations away from George, but I think the perception of the people that we look up to is, for at least from us, you know, like with me, Patrice is my guy.
And whenever I had the opportunity to interact with him, like, I almost removed myself from it because I was like, I don't want to inconvenience him.
I don't want to ask him for help.
I don't want to ask him for things.
Like, and probably they're twofold.
It's like, one, I don't want to be rejected by someone I admire so much.
And also, like, he could never have time for me.
I think we forget that like they're also comics, despite their success.
So they're also looking for some validation, some appreciation, especially from like the next crop.
So they would probably love if we reached out and love.
We were like, yo, can I just get any advice?
Is there anything?
You know, I'm about to experience something you experienced earlier in your career, et cetera.
And yeah, like, I guess maybe.
Yeah, I don't know if you've ever felt that way about like an OG that you looked up to.
Nah, you got it.
Nah, it's not that.
I think I like taking advice from whoever, man.
I do get what you mean, though.
It's like, I've looked up to this person.
I don't want to like risk pissing them off or like being told something that's going to put me off to him.
But I didn't really start admiring a lot of the comedians out there until I got a chance to meet them personally.
Then I was just like, yo, this dude's actually really cool.
Like, this person's super funny and stuff.
And then they started kind of helping me out.
So I kind of went in like neutral.
Like, I didn't, I didn't, there wasn't anybody who was like, oh, shit, I get to work with this person.
Like, come on, give me advice.
I just kind of kicked back.
It was just like, man, whoever I get to work with, I'll work with them.
If they kick advice, they kick advice.
I'll take it from whoever, you know?
I don't know the situation, but my assumption of it is a lot of times when people try to relate to a comedian, they talk about other comedians that are funny.
And that's the last thing a comedian wants.
Like, don't tell me this other motherfucker's funny.
So I'm imagining George is getting a lot of people.
They're trying to curry favor with him going, yo, have you heard about this young guy?
You like this young guy?
So he's hearing this nonstop and now he's on his podcast.
Another guy's bringing it up.
And he's like, yo, what the fuck is going on over here?
I'm George.
Let's talk about me.
Maybe.
I do know like at the beginning of that podcast, they were talking about Paul Rodriguez, I think.
Oh, yeah.
He had like some beef with Paul Rodriguez.
I don't know what it was.
I think they got into it over a joke.
I think they fought at the Laugh Factory.
Yeah.
And then he was saying how he was, how like, I think people wanted him to like apologize to Paul or for talking shit about Paul.
He was just like, it's like, what do you say?
Like, oh, it's a fucking podcast.
Like, just talk your shit, man.
Yeah.
And then, I don't know.
They went on to the subject of like, do you, do you help the younger guys?
And George was like, I don't help nobody.
Yeah.
And then he was probably like, well, fired up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's one of the reasons that it didn't bug me is because he was already like proving the like, I don't fucking help people.
Like, yeah, fuck him.
I feel like they could have named anybody and he would have been like, yeah, fuck that guy.
Yeah.
I think he also, at one point, if you look, I have heard he's not the most helpful guy, to be fair.
I have also heard that.
Three-dimensional about it.
But there's also a moment where he looks off camera and asks his homie, like, you heard of this guy?
And the guy says, no.
And I think he's laughing at George.
George looks at him and like lifts his eyebrows.
Every comic knows we got a guy going off camera, we got to fucking go.
So then he goes, I don't know, fucking Jeremy Barbasaul or whatever.
I think he's just trying to make his homie laugh and he's wrapped up in it.
And he's got the emotion.
But like, I think he just feels like he got a guy laughing.
Yeah.
That's built momentum.
Yeah, I don't think it was, I don't think it was that personal.
I think it was very much like a whoever it could have been.
My name is Arbitrary.
Is that how you use it?
I really stumbled on it, dude.
I almost thought that's what your name was.
I was like, yo, arbitrary.
And also, word could have got back to him.
Like you said, people would say at your shows, like, oh, you're George Lopez.
And you're like, fuck George Lopez.
And maybe word got back to him.
And now he's like, yo, that's true.
His youngest popping, you know?
Yo, that is true.
But my defense would be the same.
Like, I don't know.
I was talking shit.
Yeah, it's a show.
It don't fucking matter.
Yeah.
If it's like really getting to anybody, I think they would have like told me something personally.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
I don't think he's heard about it.
I don't think.
Have you met comics before?
I probably said that once, like in Detroit or like Milwaukee, where I was just, they were like, you're the next George Lopez.
I'm like, man, fuck.
George Lopez.
Like, you're the next Paul.
I was like, oh, it gets back to them, bro.
Yeah.
There's some guy in Milwaukee writing the letter like, boy, you don't, you're not going to believe what I'm saying.
And they just hear it, man, and they just get upset.
They're sensitive too.
You don't think they are.
You like, like, I had a fuck, and it's, I'm glad that you don't look up to them because it doesn't matter as much.
But when you admire them and then they let you down like that, that shit, that is.
It stays with you.
Yeah, it's just, yeah, it's just like, I remember there was.
It would hurt if like Russell Crowe was like, fuck that Jeremy Barbasaw.
Like, what the fuck?
Gladiator doesn't like me.
It hurts way more, bro.
It hurts so much.
Like, Spaniard hates me.
Yeah, it was.
Yeah, it's always tricky, man.
I remember Chappelle was on Rogan and Rogan is the best.
He's always trying to give everybody a shout out and put everybody on.
And he was like, yo, you know, you're doing, he was like, Chappelle, you're doing these great shows outside, you know, in the barn or whatever.
And there's another guy who's doing a lot of great stuff online, this guy, Andrew Schultz.
He's doing these videos online and turn your phone and he's writing jokes and there's images.
And Chappelle just goes, yeah, I don't know about that slideshow shit.
I do stand-up comedy.
And it was just like, I remember watching, like, oof.
That would have hurt.
Damn.
Like, I was upset.
And then I realized that, like, it's a probably similar situation where like people around Chappelle thinking they're going to connect with him by going, hey, if you check this guy out, he's also funny.
And he's a comic.
He don't want to hear about that shit.
He wants to hear about how he's funny.
Like, I've had friends who are just at random shows in New York saying that he'll like bring me up on stage and like, you know, take little shots.
Man.
It could be the top of the game.
George Lopez, Dave, they'll hold on to shit.
That's nuts.
Yeah.
Chappelle Fans Ignore His Comedy00:15:18
And the lesson is to not let that happen to you because there will come a time, you keep going, you're going to be the king, and there's going to be a motherfucker that's going to take your spot to the youth because you're going to be old.
You're going to be 46, 56.
And you got to remember, I can't be like that.
I got to break that pattern.
Everybody is a Benny Blanco until they get Benny Blancoed.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
100%.
But right now it's my time, so I'll enjoy it.
There you go.
Okay, so you can't move out of Dallas because you got a kid.
Yeah, I got a four-year-old.
Why don't you, can you move the mom as well?
Like, I feel like I got her to move once.
From where?
From, so we grew up in Dallas.
We live outside of Dallas now.
We're out in the country.
And I got her to move out there because there's like a better school district.
And I wanted my son to go to school out there.
I don't want to go to school with like a bunch of dog-ass beans, you know?
Yeah.
I haven't seen anybody take away the ER from that word, but it is.
He's put it in ER.
It's just harsh, man.
Yeah, you got to take away the ER.
That's all you got to do to make the words excuse me.
Every profanity, bro.
Just take out the ER.
You got a Mexican a bean?
When you say it was a little harder.
Bro, I don't know.
You can is funny, dude.
You could pass as like half Mexican, I think.
Everybody, I'm Mexican, bro.
He's doing a movie roll, right?
Everybody's always like, like back in Dallas, you can see you had fucking fans everywhere.
I remember people, when I tell them I do comedy, they'd be like, oh, yeah, do you like watching that one guy?
I don't know if he's Mexican, but he could be Mexican.
And I'd be like, Andrew Schwarzen, like, yeah.
Yeah, I don't know.
You could do a Upa.
If anybody's going to say Beaner, it should be you.
That's what I'm talking about, man.
It should be you.
Is Beener that bad?
I don't think so.
I don't think it's that bad at all.
Is he invited to the Quintanier or whatever y'all call it there?
Salah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't think it's that bad.
I don't like webback sounds kind of mean, but even that one's like.
That one sounds mean to me, but it's funny, though.
It's still funny.
Yeah.
I think it's more funny than mean.
I think some are more mean than funny, and some are more funny.
But I got my son's mom to move out there.
And I feel like I had one move.
I could either get her to move out here or I could have got her move out there.
But I got that one.
So I was like, fuck.
That money's going to go up.
And that move is going to be way easier.
That'd be cool.
Yeah.
When the time comes, I would like to try to move him out here.
Yeah.
Like New York.
New York?
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
I can see you in New York.
He has a vibe.
It's New York.
That's why I say that.
And you like stand-up?
Like, because there's less, there's less here than there's less here for like industry, but it seems like you just want to fucking grind at this stand-up thing.
I might be wrong.
I might just be talking shit, right?
If this actually ever happened, I might be like sad or something.
I don't know.
I really think I'd be fine with going back to just having a day job.
I was a barber for a long time.
I really think I'd be fine with going back to the barbershop if I could do it out here and just do stand-up three, four spots a night.
You know what I mean?
Really?
Yeah, it'd be fine.
Yeah.
This is the first week that I haven't made money in a while and it feels really good.
I'm a bum at heart.
I got so much pussy in Dallas because of that.
Really?
Yeah, I was just a loser.
And girls like that in Dallas.
Yeah.
Is that why you didn't get any pussy on there?
Maybe.
It's too cool.
Maybe that was my issue.
I was too successful.
Yeah.
Really?
So explain how the girls give you pussy for bumming it, as you say.
Man, I wasn't like killing the killing it, but I'm living at my grandma's.
Fire.
Yeah.
You know who else grew up with their grandparents?
Lopez.
Yo.
Yo.
He stole that from me, though.
Yeah, I don't know.
I just, I work sometimes and I like to kind of have fun sometimes.
And I think shit happens.
But I have friends who, like, the minute they got out of jail and they had their ankle monitors, they're on home confinement, they just post that ankle monitor.
Fucking DMs are flooded.
No.
You get more pussy.
If you got an ankle monitor, you're stuck at the house.
You get more pussy than anybody who can go flex at the club.
That makes sense.
Really?
Yeah.
I think girls want ratchets.
They want to know where a guy is.
You can't cheap and you got an ankle monitor.
You know what I mean?
You're stuck in the house.
Yeah.
That is actually good.
There's a security.
Get the ankle monitor out.
It's like this motherfucker out in the streets.
Yeah, my buddy Sal had an ankle monitor, and I used to go to his house and cut his hair.
He couldn't leave.
And anytime I'd go, there'd be like a different chick there.
Just like rolling up weed for him.
It was like some pimp shit.
I feel like I was in a music video.
Yeah.
It doesn't have to be an ankle monitor.
You can put a dog collar on there.
They'll still show up.
They can't tell the difference.
It's kind of smart, actually.
You should sell that.
Do you have a lot on a pager?
Just fucking honestly.
It's like super easy.
Damn, bro.
So, girls in Dallas are giving pussy for a lack of ambition, you're saying.
Yeah, dude, if you have ambition, it's so corny these days.
Yo, facts, bro.
I had to hide the fact that I wanted to be a comedian from girls so that I could get laid.
Because once you started telling about your dreams, they were like, I can't suck on dreams.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
You got dreams where you're like, guys, get out of here.
It's over.
Now, after bumming it and the girls giving you pussy, were you ever like curious about why they would do that?
I'm still curious about it to this day.
Oak Cliff girls?
Oak Cliff girls, mesquite, Dallas girls in general.
They're still curious about it.
I don't know.
I don't understand it, but I don't need to.
I just had to enjoy it.
That's right.
Don't overthink that.
That's what we're learning.
Yeah.
Let's not overthink.
No.
Do mushrooms, get AIDS, whatever.
You ever fucking grow cowboy boots on them?
Cowboy boots?
Yeah.
Nah.
I mean, I got my first pair of cowboy boots like six months ago.
I wore them once.
And I was like, they're not you wearing them.
Oh, her wearing them?
Yeah.
Nah.
That'd be cool, though.
Yeah.
But nah, nothing, no, no cowboy boots yet.
That cowboy culture isn't really hitting in your generation, huh?
Nah, it is.
Trust me.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
If there's anybody that's going to get more pussy in the bum, it's a dude in some cowboy boots, like a Mexican dude, just trucker hat, mullet.
Those Mexicans with the mullets, them dudes are out there.
Shout out to Dallas Mullet Mexican beans.
They're fucking...
They got a truck?
Bro, you got a truck in Texas.
Like, you said, bro, you don't need a penis.
I think we grew up in different Texases, yo.
Everybody had trucks when I was growing up.
Everybody had a truck.
Yeah.
And a lot of motherfuckers were broke.
And I don't think they were getting that much pussy at everybody.
If you have a truck and you live at your parents, that's it.
You're set.
Pussy waterfall.
Did you grow up with money?
Yeah.
We were like rich growing up.
No.
I swear to God.
Me and Chris were talking about this.
Rich and living in Oak Cliff?
Well, living in Mesquite.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So you started out rough area.
I was like, I just went back and forth a couple times.
But the house we were in.
Hey, let's go from Oak Cliff to Mesquite.
I mean, like...
Hood to like lower middle class.
Well, you summers.
Well, the house we were in was like borderline gardening mesquite.
And we were the first ever like Hispanic people on that whole block.
There was us.
There was one black family across from us.
Everybody else was white.
It was like a nice house.
So that's rich.
My uncle bought that house when he was like 18.
Yeah, he like hired a realtor.
And my uncle, my mom's brother, got my dad into, they were drug dealers, like sold like all sorts of drugs.
My uncle was like a right-hand man for like a cartel in Mexico.
Oh shit.
Yeah, like we were like spoiled.
No matter where we lived, we were always like sold taken care of.
I had like all the video games.
I had like so much clothes.
Like my uncle had a Corvette, a BMW.
Like I've been so rich and I've been so poor.
And like either way, I'm chilling.
Yeah, yeah.
I realize that.
Yeah.
So that's why I'm like, if I have money, they're not like, who cares?
It's going to be good.
Yeah.
I mean, they're not rich anymore.
Like, I can't just rely on them.
Don't get me wrong.
Glory days are over, right?
Yeah.
But like, I don't know.
I'm chilling anymore.
I didn't know that.
You feel comfortable talking about it?
They're cool.
Like, some parts.
If there's ever anything that I should have said, I'm just not going to say it.
All right.
Fair enough.
The money came in.
It was flush.
Were you worried about anybody getting taken out?
Nah, because I didn't even, bro, I was like oblivious.
I was like a dumb kid.
Like, I'm like 15, 16 years old.
Did you guys ever watch the Sopranos?
Yeah.
You remember like first season?
It was like Meadows, telling her little brother, like an AJ.
Yeah.
Yeah, she's saying an AJ, like, our dad's in the mafia, you're dumbass.
Like, that's how like my cousins were like telling me.
And I was just like, nah, uh, you know what I mean?
Like, that they're like, who, who around us has a job?
And I was just like, oh, shit.
Like, I never thought about it.
Did the neighborhood know?
Nah, not at all.
So there wasn't any judgment from the neighbors that were like, yeah, they're drug dealers.
Don't let them play with the kids.
Nah, there's nothing.
They didn't have no idea.
They thought, like, my grandpa had like a job and doing like sheetrock and stuff.
He's probably the one guy in our whole family who had like a job, yeah.
So everybody's just like, oh, he probably just runs like a sheetrock business, I guess.
Wow.
Yeah.
How did your family end up telling you?
Or is there ever a discussion about it?
There was once I was like 16 or something like that.
I just started asking them about it a little bit here and there.
My dad one time like confessed it to me when he had like quit.
He like got out of that.
He got out of that.
And then like four years after he had quit, he was running, he had like different businesses he'd run.
He had like a body shop and like a painting.
Like they used to go paint like apartments and buildings and stuff.
And one day like four years after he had quit, he was like running a job site and like agents, federal agents just showed up and were like, yo, you're under arrest.
So he had already told me before that.
And I had like questions here and there, but I also didn't, I didn't want like, that's their life.
I didn't want to get too much into it.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
But wild experience.
Yeah.
Well, I'm telling you, we lived like kings.
So was it worth it?
I asked my dad that and I've asked my uncle that because they went to the feds.
They've done their time.
But it was like, it wasn't like behind bars.
It was like prison camp.
They went to the country club.
Minimum security or whatever.
Yeah, because they had no records.
They had no like violent records.
Did they flip?
Did they?
I don't think so.
They told me no.
I'm not like, like I said, I still don't ask them shit.
And the cartel would probably handle that if they did.
Yeah.
I do remember.
I was just working around.
I do remember when my uncle was on trial, him telling, like I asked him a little bit about it.
Cause I'm curious, but I'm also like...
Scared, probably.
Very.
Nah, it's just that they never talked about it to anybody.
Yeah.
So I just, I did not want to, it's kind of like what you said when you look at the comedians you look up to, you don't want a fanboy and then they, and then they be like, fucking crush your dreams.
Yeah.
I didn't want to feel like I was disrespecting my uncle or my dad or any of the serious shit they had going on by being like, do you know Al Coupon?
Like, it's a stupid ass question, you know?
I'm like, but I'm just grateful they gave me a fucking badass life.
I'm grateful they're alive.
Like, I don't know what their business is.
I don't know how, like, I know my uncle would be stressed a lot.
You know what I mean?
I did ask him like one time, and I just remember him saying that like his bosses in Mexico were like, like thinking of prison in America as like a joy.
Like, don't, don't do that.
Like, just come down here, like, retire down here.
Like, we'll build you a cabo.
But my uncle was just like, nah, I should just.
Because he had his whole family here and he didn't want to leave the family.
He didn't want to force it.
I don't think he really cared too much about all that.
He's like a family man, but he's not like this, like, come home and kiss your kid on the forehead.
He's just like, had a son here, a son there.
He'll spend time with him, but he's not like, he's like a single, he's like a bachelor life type dude.
But nah, I think he just felt like, I think he just felt like, fuck it, like I made my bed.
I'll lay in it like handle up.
You know what I mean?
Right.
And so yeah, I think the shit they were doing, if they would have flipped, like there would have been definitely consequences.
You know what I mean?
To Andrew's early point, do you think that's where you kind of got this?
I'm assuming in your family, there's this idea like, look, whatever happens tomorrow, we can't really worry about that because tomorrow everything could go.
We could be X, we could be killed, we could be in jail.
Yeah, I guess.
You don't worry about today.
Who cares about tomorrow?
Do you think that was passed on to you?
Maybe not.
I don't think anything of them was passed on to me.
You don't understand, like in my family, I'm like the Corker Romano brother Fredo, like dumbass.
Like the fact that comedy's working out for me now, now they're just like, yo, good job, Ralphie.
But like for the longest, they're just like, fucking more.
But I don't think that I'm the one guy in my family who like finished high school and they're just like, he's a pussy.
So everybody else was, you know, family business or involved kind of thing.
I don't want those younger, like my cousin Carlos.
He's like an older brother than me, lovely death, right?
Me and him were like the spoiled.
Like my cousin Carlos got into his fair share of trouble, but he was more like.
Thug when you think of a thug, you think about this dude, like tattoos and shit.
Our parents were more like, you know, they looked like they operated a cell phone store.
They like managed that store.
You know what I mean?
They were very like, don't look like an idiot.
Exactly.
What's the matter with you?
But we were like, we were like spoiled, man.
We're like the son from John Wick, the first one, remember?
Where's she like, you stole John Wiz Carrie a little more?
We're like the little dumbasses who are like, yeah, our parents.
But my cousin Carlos got into his fair share of stuff.
And a little relative here or there maybe got into other shit with them.
Never on their level, but something.
But I never touched any of that.
But you were observing it all.
I'm observing it.
But I also knew very much, like, that's not me at all.
But you're chilling.
You're taking it all.
I mean, because I've watched a lot of your stuff.
Like, I think the first time your comedy came up, it was like maybe a don't tell comedy clip.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And here's actually an interesting connection is like that, seeing that, it was a really funny clip.
And then I saw a bunch of other stuff come up from you.
And it was in that moment that I realized that like don't tell comedy is the new comedy central.
Whereas like you can find young new comics.
This is back in Comedy Central, like early my days when it was this platform that could like showcase young people.
And I was like, oh, it's transitioned to YouTube.
And a guy like Ralph and there's other people can start their clips, go viral.
And then all of a sudden there's this interest.
And I was like, oh, wow, something is happening over here.
And, but I remember watching a bunch of your stuff and even like talking to you now.
Yeah, the kind of energy I'm getting is like, you were around some very interesting things.
And I imagine you were kind of chilling in the cut, taking all of it in, and it's all kind of swirling around.
And then when you took your shots, obviously you have your lines.
I imagine you've been funny your whole life.
But no?
Sometimes, I guess.
But not funny in terms of like, I need to jump on top of a table and everybody look at me.
Nah, yeah.
I don't know.
Family Money and Viral Clips00:02:43
I think like half the rooms I was in, I was like the clown.
And then the other half, I was like, I'm going to keep my head down and not say a word.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it's really interesting to see like, fuck Ralph, what a life, man.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
I'm only here because I'm a loser in my world.
Drug dealer.
Ralph can't deal no drugs.
Yeah, but that's how they kept you alive, though.
I'm telling you, like.
Maybe that's why you also embrace being a loser because it's like, that's what kept me alive is being the loser of the family, not getting in any of that.
Oh, it kept me alive, but it kept me out of trouble.
That could be an interesting one.
Maybe you have like supremely high emotional IQ and you're like, if I let these motherfuckers know how smart I am, they're going to make me take over the family business.
So I got to be a dumbass.
You got to make that movie like a godfather spent off your business.
Yeah, your brother's probably fucking from a family that runs Mexico.
You're watching me?
No, but you're watching Godfather and you're seeing Fredo be a dumbass and then give him no responsibility and you're like, hey, yeah, like my uncle got kind of sick.
He ended up like in the hospital around Christmas time.
And a lot of my family had to drive.
He was taking a trip back from Mexico because he's like a free man now, right?
He's just like, whatever.
He's visiting family in Mexico.
We hadn't seen him in a lot of years and he's coming back and ended up in the hospital.
So we had to drive down to like South South Texas, like to the border almost, well, to the border and like be there.
But I remember it seemed like a lot of my family could not afford to be there for that many days because he was in the ICU for like two weeks or something.
Oh shit.
And so like, I do remember this is like around the first time I'm having money.
So, I spent a lot of money making sure that they could all be in hotels to be there with them.
And I did kind of feel like, like a Michael, like, it's all right, pop.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like, I want to take care of it, pop.
You know what I mean?
It seems like right when you're having success with something, you're like, I should not do this.
Yeah.
In the beginning of the pod, you're like, I want to be a barber.
I paint it.
I painted.
But it is funny that you think girls are fucking you because you're a loser and they're actually fucking you because your family is Prince Harry of the cartel.
And you're like, oh, I don't know.
They're really spoiled.
He had sneakers.
He had clothes.
He had flexible.
That's why you're fucking gender.
No, no, no.
But you don't understand when I'm 18 and they're gone.
Like, they didn't leave money for me.
They're not like, hey, but the girls don't know these Mexicans.
But I'm not thinking they're all sexy.
Nobody, nobody like bought me a car.
Like, I'm, I'm spoiled, but I'm still like my own man to them.
So they're like, fucking earn your own buck.
Do your shit.
Yeah.
When you were a kid.
When I was a kid, they were like, here's everything.
Yeah.
And then from one day to another, they're like, you should have earned it all on your own, dumbass.
Sketches That Click on Stage00:05:06
Like, so I had like all sorts of different jobs, which is true what you're saying.
Like, once I started reaching some shit in a job, like, I would leave.
I was painting cars for a long time.
My dad ran a body shop.
His younger brother, my uncle, worked there for like years and like learned, taught himself how to paint his shit.
And he taught me.
And once I got a job, I ended up getting a job at somebody else's body shop.
I was in school to get certified.
And that guy got me like an early certification with some other company.
And he like made me like the painter there, which is kind of hard to do.
Like, you have to do it for years.
And that was by this time, I'm like 20.
I had done open mics on and off for like a while, but I went back to the open mics and then I was just like, I'm going to stick to this instead.
And I quit painting.
Like, I just, I went and got a job delivering pizzas so that I could be able to go to open mics like right after work.
Yeah.
But I was just like, I was making really good money doing that.
And I was just like, nah, I should deliver pizzas.
No, you love this comedy shit, man.
Yeah, I always loved it a lot.
You love this comedy.
I love it a lot.
I love it a lot.
You remember the first person you saw do stand-up?
George Lopez.
Imagine.
Nah, like live, not live.
Video.
Yeah.
Just the first person.
Dave Chappelle.
Really?
Yeah, Dave Chappelle.
For what it's worth.
Killing them softly.
But I didn't know.
Like, I didn't get what was going on.
I didn't really get what stand-up was.
I was just a Chappelle show fan.
My uncle, who I'm telling you, he's a fucking huge comedy fan.
He loves comedy.
Yeah.
So he always had like the Chappelle show on DVD.
Yeah.
And he like left one at my grandma's house one time.
I was like, I don't know, man, like nine or something.
Yeah.
So I started watching it.
You know, it's fun.
I was like bringing all my friends over to watch Chappelle show and shit and Rick James, all that shit.
Like every fucking sketch.
It was just like whack Arnold's.
We were recording this shit at school.
And then one day flipping through the channels on Comedy Central because sometimes I'd catch it on TV.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
One day he came on and I was just like, oh shit, Chappelle show.
But it was followed by talking.
And I was just like, yo, when's he gonna do skits?
What the fuck?
Yeah, yeah.
But then I just kept watching it and I was just like, oh, shit.
It's like stand-up comedy.
Like, and I've seen it here and there, like on movies or whatever.
Yeah.
But I'm just like, oh, shit, like, he's a stand-up comedian.
Like, then I got it.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
But yeah, I was probably the first ever person I ever saw doing stand-up.
And when you watch, I mean, kill himself, it was so fucking good.
But when you watch him do stand-up, you understand why the sketch was so successful because he builds the sketches in the stand-up.
Baby on the corner is a sketch.
Right?
Yeah.
You know, and it's just like, yeah, I remember seeing the sketch show and being like, oh, wow, you're just adding color to these already brilliant ideas.
Yeah.
I definitely felt that.
Like the, I think one of the first sketches I saw on Chappelle's show was the everything's better in slow motion.
So that one, I don't know how to deliver that on stage, right?
But I think that was like the perfect sketch.
Like they did like the three versions, the, the, the one they're in the laundromat and the fucking the detergent con squared out, the club shit.
That shit had me, I'm like nine years old, like crying right there.
But once I saw him, um, once I'd watched like the four episodes and see him kind of introduce the skit with a little bit of stand-up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It kind of like clicks where I'm just like, yo, each sketch is like a bit like that you could perfectly do on stage.
Yeah.
But yeah, that's all right there.
Who's yours?
The first person was, I listened to Eddie Murphy on cassette with my dad.
Man, your dad was a stand-up fan?
Yeah, he loved, he loved stand-up.
Like him and his friends would listen to Pryor on a record at a party.
That was like a common thing to do.
You just like have it going on a party like music.
You're close with your dad?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then, but like for me, then obviously then Chris Rock, I think was like the first person when I was maybe in my teens where I was like, oh, this guy kind of thinks in this, you know, counterintuitive way.
And he like makes these really cool arguments for things that like shouldn't be argued for.
And I really like that.
You know, and I was.
I remember bringing the pain being like, oh, this is what stand-up is.
And then Patrice, Patrice was Microsoft.
For me, my top two is Chappelle and then Patrice.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For me, it's Patrice.
I mean, Chappelle's obviously up there.
He's brilliant, but like seeing Patrice live.
I wish I could have seen that.
It was so...
We were at the Elephant in the Room taping, but we saw him also just at clubs.
But seeing him live, it was just the most pure form of it.
You ever on stage and you'll have glimpses of like, you have glimpses of the best version of yourself doing stand-up.
You know, like it could be a joke or it could be like a reaction or it could be like holding tension.
Like you hold tension really well.
And it's just like holding the breath of the room.
You can almost like feel the room breathe.
You know what I'm saying?
Patrice Live at the Elephant Room00:04:22
Like you're getting everybody on the same page.
And it's just like, it was that.
It was like this guy's holding a room and they're just waiting and people are furious, but they're not leaving.
And people are really excited.
People are looking like couples are almost fighting.
And it was just like, there was so much going on in the room.
You know, it was like this organized chaos.
And he's got them all right there.
Bro.
That's badass.
Bro, I mean, and then just this, like, even like he'd have the most profound shit, but also like the silliest thing.
Like, I remember him telling this fucking, this guy was eating chicken.
Oh, yeah, eating all the meat off the bone.
And it was like, and you've, I've heard the thing about like, you know, Black People Lee Chicken, all the thing.
He goes, he said this.
He's like, man, we even eat the part of the chicken that ain't even chicken.
You know, that little part that's like, it ain't bone, it ain't chicken.
And he's like, I forget.
It's like Lego or he had like some like reference for it.
And it was just like, I don't know.
The guy was fucking special, man.
Yeah, I'm always curious about like guys early, like, who are those people that decide what comedy is for you?
Because we see comedy all the time.
You watch movies and then something hits you and you're like, oh, fuck.
This can work.
You know?
Yeah.
Yeah, the holding.
Yeah, the holding tension.
I think that's another reason why your stuff works so well online because there are certain guys that are great live, but they don't translate through that.
Have you ever experienced a comic like that?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I see guys who like, I can't even get into their clips very much.
Or like, they're just, their social media is just not growing.
They're not on it enough.
Their clips just aren't engaging.
Yeah.
But I've seen them in person.
And murder.
And I'm like, bro, I wish I could do that.
I would give up social media places if I could be as good as you on stage.
That shit just, yeah, I see that a lot.
But yeah, yeah.
I think you're one of the comedians that kind of capitalized on like the internet like firsthand.
People were just like, whoa, shit, it's fucking off of YouTube just blew it up.
I think it was like your, what was it, like 441?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That thing started it off.
I think it kicked it off and it made everybody fucking want to be like, yo, yo, get on it.
Yeah.
And like, I didn't want to for the longest.
Like, I hate, like, I hated Instagram.
I still fucking hate TikTok, Big Tim, like Instagram shit.
Like, I just turned off my notifications.
I'm like, but once I did the don't tell taping, I knew that it like get some eyes on my page.
So I was just like, all right, now I'm a little more motivated to like start posting more and like figure out how I can get my page.
But I feel like you can't follow the same fucking method that everybody like, you just post once a week.
You do this.
Find your own.
Yeah.
You got to find your own beat to it, your own rhythm or whatever.
So I just kind of waited till that thing came.
Well, I waited for like a month.
I waited till it was about a month before that.
And then I just stockpiled as many clips as I could and figured it out.
But I had to figure it out.
But I definitely think if it wasn't for social media, YouTube, I wouldn't be like on a tour right now at all.
Yeah, maybe be different, but at least you got more control of it.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like, I think the talented people rise.
I think the cool thing about the internet is that it allows the talented people to be seen quicker.
Yeah.
At least the people choose.
Exactly.
I do like that a lot.
There's very few people.
Like I think about like when I talk to Congress, because there are a lot of comics, especially like the older ones are like, oh, I don't want to pose.
I don't want to pose.
Everybody posing.
It's just like the people that I know that have blown up from the internet are way funnier than the people that I know that are successful from traditional.
There's very few people that I know that have like really hit.
I'm not talking about people who had a clip or two go viral.
I'm talking about like they're selling out clubs or selling out theaters.
Like they're funny.
And there are people that like have had maybe traditional specials that I think a lot of us can be like, yeah, they ain't the funniest.
And it's because the people aren't really deciding.
There's also a little bit more of that raw feeling.
Like the Raws is going to get his live stand-up.
Yeah.
That's fucking raw.
But it's closer to Raw when you see it on Instagram or on YouTube than a fucking edited special and everything.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
When even if it is like an edited special, even when they just get that, but fucking put it on YouTube, it just feels way cooler than to get on Netflix or get on the Showtime app.
Like, there it is.
Selling Out Clubs vs Traditional Specials00:06:45
There's like, I just want to click on the videos.
Like, oh, shit.
Like, you know what I mean?
It's also like they're discovering you.
Yeah.
Like, I remember, I remember seeing a video and then seeing you in a video and I'd be like, oh, God, this guy's funny.
And then I remember seeing a lot of other clips come up.
And I was like, oh, it's happening.
And I've been through it.
So I see it with different guys.
And I'm like, oh, it's happening for him.
This is really cool to see.
And I get excited when the people choose someone that they like that's also funny, you know?
And yeah, there's like a cool justice in that.
Yeah, I very much feel like Spaniard right now in Gladiator.
See what I'm saying?
See what I'm saying?
The people's champ, man.
People's champ.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I am amazing.
Yeah, it is a stand-up's the fucking best in that way and was the most frustrating for the same reason before.
You know?
It is like it is dope, though.
Like I remember the first time I came to New York.
I hate like I hate watching comedy shows that I'm not on.
Yeah, yeah.
It's painful.
Yeah, you get it, right?
Like, you want to do that too.
But I remember thinking, like, I have to watch a show at the settler.
Like, that's, that's been to me like the dream club.
Like, I would like, you know what I mean?
So I'm like, I have to go watch that.
I remember seeing dudes, like I saw, wasn't it Greer Barnes?
Oh, dude.
Yeah, unreal.
And seeing him and like, I had seen him maybe twice on YouTube.
And that's it.
That's all there is of him on there.
You know what I mean?
And I remember seeing like that longer set and just thinking like, yo, like it is so badass that this is where I have to see you.
This is the only place I can see you just fucking like masterful stand-up.
Like, and then there was a couple other comics like that who I had never seen before.
I learned about them there, like watching them.
I'm just like, I don't, you know, I'm looking them up afterwards.
And the less I find of them on the internet, the more I'm like, that was badass.
Like, that was badass.
I bet, I bet you.
I don't know.
I mean, who knows, right?
But I think that's when I first started thinking, like, man, if I could live in New York, like, I wouldn't even care if I could never be famous.
Just the fact that I could come out here and just like get really good.
You make a living doing stand-up.
You can do the clubs and make a living.
And just nobody even knows who you are.
That would be badass.
That's to me is like the ultimate dream.
Like, I've never, before this little tour started, I'd never been recognized.
And like, it started happening.
And like 99% of the people who could approach me or like recognize me or whatever are like nice or whatever.
But there does come moments where you're just like, yo, leave me alone.
Like, I followed into a restroom and the dude waited for me to come out the stall and shit.
Like, it's fucking weird.
And when those moments happen, I feel like I'm doing something wrong.
I'm like, I should have been at clubs where nobody knows me, but I'm like still getting paid.
That would be the dream to me.
Why don't you want the, why don't you want to affect people in that way?
Or do you not want the reaction of that?
I don't know.
For a long time, I was an only child.
I have siblings or whatever.
They're way younger than me, though.
So maybe that's one of it.
I'm just kind of like socially like, when I'm expecting to be alone, I'm really comfortable in the alone.
And then somebody kind of snaps me out of it.
Like, yo.
I also grew up in big shit talking environments.
Like, I grew up at the barbershop where it's just, it's not even funny anymore.
It's just shit talking, shit, talking.
You know what I mean?
My family's like that.
I'm telling you, I was like the dumbass of the family.
They're like always shitting on me.
So when somebody comes up to you and it's like, just like really nice and like they compliment you.
You don't know how to handle it.
Yeah.
I'm like, what the fuck are you doing right now?
I'm very like, I'm looking behind me to see who's going to fucking stab me.
Like, they're distracting me because if somebody's going to fucking rob me, that's what's like in my head.
Like, this, I mean, we grew up in New York, but I imagine a similar situation.
It's like anytime someone's nice to us, they're trying to get money from us.
Yeah.
So initially, I was very concerned as well.
Like, even when people looked at me, I remember when I was first on TV and people like look for me across the street.
In my mind, it's like a state.
It's like the staring, it's like the mad dog contest.
So like, I'd be like, what's up?
And they'd be like, aren't you on MTV?
I'd be like, oh, okay, yeah.
There's an adjustment period.
Like, I thought this guy wants to fight me.
Yesterday, Mark comes up to me.
He gives me a couple of.
He's like, yo, you're looking good.
I was like, yo, shut the fuck up.
Immediately.
Fucking dude yesterday in Queens rolled the window down.
I was like, yo, you're that guy, right?
But as soon as I seen him slowing down, rolling down the window, I'm like, yo, cartel is bad.
Yeah, so it takes a little bit to adjust, but I will say there's a, do you fuck with Norm at all?
I feel like you would fuck with Norm.
Normal.
Oh, yeah.
I feel like a huge Norm McDonald's.
Yeah, Norm is great.
Yeah, that dude was fucking badass.
He had that set.
I think this is the set that made me like, when I started doing comedy, my first two goals, ultimate goals, was like, I want to do late night and I want to get in at the seller, right?
Yeah.
I was like, like 18 or something, and I'm just looking up stand-up comics and stuff.
I'm trying to get more into it.
And I saw his set.
That was like the last set he did on Letterman.
Yeah.
And I was like, yo, like, that's what like joke writing is right there.
He's, he did that joke about ID.
He's like, I stands for I and D stands for identification.
It's just funny as fuck.
So like, yeah, Norm McDonald's like fucking badass.
Yeah, he's great.
He had an excerpt in his book where he was talking about because I think a lot of people do feel uncomfortable with like some level of fame and some level of maybe like appreciation.
And he had an interesting perspective on it.
He was like, I get the best version of people.
And for the majority of my life, I've been famous.
And when people meet me, they're happy.
They're on their best with behavior.
They're excited.
And most people, when they get to meet strangers, they're in a shitty mood.
They're cursing.
They're upset.
And I remember him saying that.
And I was like, whoa, dude, I got to.
I didn't even think about that.
Right?
Yeah, I didn't think about that at all.
And like, how fortunate.
You feel like a spoiled little bitch now.
It's also funny, though, that like all the good things that happen to you in a stand-up is all the things you don't want to happen to if you're involved in drug dealing.
You know what I mean?
So like getting recognized, making a ton of money, walking around with a ton of money, like being too flashy, having jewelry.
I will say this, knowing who you are.
You're probably almost like raised to be like, yo, low profile, low profile.
Yeah.
Strangers are walking up to you, like, are you that guy?
If you get too successful as a drug dealer, you get arrested.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
You can't go too high.
You're literally treating it like drug dealers.
You're like, I mean, a fake job.
I'm a barber.
Yeah, yeah.
No one knows me.
I go into a club late at night, sling some jokes.
I'm just like, yo, chill here.
Let me leave before you guys leave.
Bro, he's a drug dealer.
I'm telling you.
You really are.
Yeah, it does feel like I'm not supposed to be enjoying shit, but.
Yeah, you're a joke dealer.
Low Profile Wealth Warning00:04:35
Yeah.
A little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But you will be able to enjoy it.
Yeah, I think you should read that norm book, man, or check that out.
He has some really interesting perspective.
I'll check it out.
Yeah, it is a weird thing.
You read a lot of books?
No.
Can I be honest with you?
I just read that little part.
I didn't read the whole book.
I just read the last paragraph.
I've read chapters out of like different books.
I can tell you a lot of things about like a little bit about a lot of things.
Does that make sense?
Well, yeah, I just read little chapters here and there.
Yeah, yeah.
Ralph Barbosa.
Before we wrap this up, I want the people to go obviously check out your stuff.
And I know that you would probably be the last person to do any self-promotion, even though you do post clips.
No, I'll do some self-promoting.
Okay.
Is there a piece of comedy that you would tell them to go watch?
I think a lot of times people just go, yo, watch my stuff.
But there's so much stuff and you don't know.
But is there something that you're like, yo, I think this captures me well?
Yeah, I think the 20 minutes I did with Andre No's that one.
If you go on HBO, look up fucking name, man.
Ralph Barco.
R-A-L.
Yeah, yeah.
Ralph.
I'm trying to think of the name of it.
You know, it's arbitrary.
It's not arbitrary.
Ralph Barbosa.
You know, Jeremy Barbosaw.
Nah.
Yeah.
Like, Andre, no, I wonder if that works, though.
If you go on HBO and you look up my name, will the thing come up?
Or do you have to look up the name of the special?
No, I bet you could type this shit on.
Name or something.
But also, I think that might also be on YouTube, too.
Somebody might have ripped it and put it on YouTube.
Somebody should rip it, put it on YouTube.
Check it out.
Yeah.
I should have ripped it.
Go check out Entre Nose.
Check out Ralph Barbosa.
Follow me on Instagram.
Yeah.
What's the Instagram?
Ralph Barbosa03.
It used to be Sweet Baby Ralph.
What happened?
I don't know.
I let people get in my head about changing it.
Yeah.
What are you going to do?
Well, also.
Change it back.
You can always.
People were like when I was.
What is the 03?
Also, my son was born on the 3rd.
Okay.
So I was just like, 03.
Yeah.
But when I, when I was in 2003 or on the 30th, 3rd of like January.
Why not just three?
I don't know.
03 just zeros.
Zeros are cool, man.
Yeah.
He would have got, he's a liberal.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, chill with this libtar shit, bro.
Fucking Joe Biden asked questions.
Okay, so.
Yeah, I don't know.
Whenever I'd be like at the end of a show, I'd be like, yo, follow Manister Sweet Baby Ralph.
People were like, how are you spelling baby?
Like, how are you spelling sweet?
So I was just like, you know what?
Just look up Ralph Barbosa.
Yeah.
It's fine.
But yeah, Ralph Barbosa, 03.
Bye.
Ralph Barbosa, everybody.
Get without me.
Hey, we have a conspiracy for the ages.
Multiple conspiracies for the ages.
Okay?
That's the lighting I need.
Which one do y'all want to start with?
Do y'all want to start with Twitter or do you want to start with the UFC?
Oh.
You decide.
Yeah, we can go Twitter.
We can go.
You want to go Twitter?
Apparently, Elon didn't like how many retweets his tweet got or likes his tweet got.
Joe Biden was burying Elon during the Super Bowl.
And you know what he did?
He's like, engineers, I need you to find a way to boost up my tweets if they're not doing well.
That's embarrassing.
Is it?
That's some bitch boy shit if you tag.
Is it?
Is it?
Or did he pay $44 billion for a motherfucking social media platform?
He should be able to boost whatever the fuck he wants.
Imagine you bought a house and you can't do nothing special in it.
Yeah, but you can't talk all this shit about censorship.
You own the house, Al.
But don't let that leak, though.
Don't let that leak, bro.
It's because he's got these fucking lib cucks working at Twitter and he didn't weed them all out.
These liberal cucks.
You think maybe they made up the story to make Elon look bad?
Oh, are we just, are we conspiracying on top of this?
Yeah, do we start with conspiracy?
Why not stop?
Okay, go, go, go, go.
I'll listen.
First of all, I don't know.
I think if it's all about free speech and not censoring, you got to let that shit rock.
But also, if you see Biden's thing outperforming his tweet, we need to see that first.
It couldn't have been good.
Probably mad misspelling.
Elon Musk Owns the Platform00:10:54
That was just hitting me.
Oh, yeah.
I thought you were speaking archive.
But I need to know the tweets.
I need to compare them.
But keep going.
So maybe, first of all, Elon maybe did have a meeting like, hey, you guys need to do X, Y, and Z.
And they didn't want to be there on fucking Super Bowl Sunday or the Monday morning after the Super Bowl.
And they're like, you know what?
We're going to say we're going to say this meeting was because Elon wants to boost his own specific Twitter and defy all the rules he said he was laying down when he bought it.
Did he ever say that, though?
They don't like working for him.
No, he basically said, like, we shouldn't censor.
We should have free speech.
This is innocent.
He's not censoring.
He's not having free speech.
He's been making sure his speech is a little bit more free.
Yeah, that's not free to me.
But also.
Also, he's got Jill Biden walking, caked up.
No disrespect, obviously, to the presidente.
But if you mess her up, when you give her a little smooch or what?
Listen, I'm not going to disrespect Biden.
Why is it disrespect?
Why is it disrespectful?
Well, you didn't know what I was going to say, did you?
I'm not going to disrespect the first lady by not laying it on the lips if that's what she wants.
Dang, gang.
You know what I'm saying?
If the first lady comes to me, she's from a different time, bro.
This is a different generation.
Back in the day, you used to kiss people on the lips.
I saw my mom do that with a guy once.
What?
That's weird.
He was upset.
You fought him?
I didn't fight him.
I was too young, but she was doing a dance.
It was a choreographed dance.
There was a kiss at the end of the dance.
I'm asking my dad.
I swear to God.
I'm like, why y'all subjected me to this?
Wow.
I burned that whole place down.
It was one more dance.
It was his place.
Son.
Burn it down.
Burn it down, right?
I was like, yo, you good with that?
We gonna swing on this motherfucker?
Yes.
After he just swung on my mouth.
No, but like, is this?
They were swinging?
No, but for real, like, what the hell's going on?
They're like, oh, it's the choreography.
I'm like, how necessary was that?
Yeah.
Not necessary.
At all.
At all.
They were swing dancing.
Swing dancing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They didn't have a CGI at the time.
CGI was not a big man.
No CGI.
Just planted lips on my mom.
My mom got some big lips.
Okay.
Honestly, all respect to my mom.
All respect to my mom.
All respect because I love my mom more than anything, but the lips aren't the biggest things on her.
He might have missed.
You know what I mean?
He might have.
He might have thought it was cheek.
Okay.
That's what I could say that.
We could look at it.
And I wish that they told me that instead of, yeah, that that was an intentional part of the fucking choreography.
If anybody got deducted points for missing the choreography, that's.
That means you want to get the 10.0 rating.
We can't be missing choreographed moves.
That is a good thing.
My mom's a winner, bro.
She's a winner.
My mom's a winner.
This is why Hunter's a crackhead.
What?
This is why Joe Biden's kids are crackhead.
Because his mom's spooching everyone?
You can't look at your mom tonguing down everybody.
There's no tongue.
Family cat.
It was a peck.
There's no tongue.
It's a peck now, but back in the day, you don't know what it was.
Oh, you think they got more conservative?
Fucking lips.
Okay.
Hell yeah.
That's traumatizing.
That is fucking traumatizing.
Jaden Smith.
He's crying now because his mom's just going around kissing everybody.
Everybody.
That's who they did it to him.
I hope he don't get on the crap.
Shit, I hope not.
I hope he don't get on the crack.
We got to protect Jaden.
At all costs.
All I'm trying to say is, what the fuck were we talking about?
We're talking about Twitter.
Oh, yeah.
If Elon Musk, what's the point of owning some shit you can't do what you want with it?
That's what I'm saying.
He's not the president.
He's just like, yo, make my shit the first thing you see.
Which is completely reasonable.
Tom was your first friend on Facebook or on my side.
That's right.
No one was like, oh, this guy's making friends with everyone.
No.
Also, it's not like he was publicly appointed.
He bought the shit.
It's his.
We lucky we get to be on it.
Literally, if he don't want us on it, we don't have to be.
I don't know about that.
We're lucky.
We need to say thank you.
Do you think about this with your apartment?
Maybe.
Keep going.
Are you like, man, I'm so lucky the landlord lets me pay to be here?
Have you tried to get an apartment in New York City?
Yes, I have.
Have you seen the anxiety?
The shifties messaged me at three in the fucking morning, like, listen, there's a shoebox off fucking Canal Street with three rats in it.
It's going for $3,500.
Maybe I can go look at it.
I need to get an appointment to observe it.
Yeah.
So to answer your question, I don't really remember what it was.
This Celsius is crazy.
Celsius gets you all the excitement and energy.
We get a sponsorship.
None of the retention.
That's good.
That shit is funny.
I don't need this in my life.
I do.
Talk to me.
What are you trying to forget, bro?
That shit woke me up.
Are you going through something?
Why are you trying to forget everything?
I mean, you know, trauma.
Yeah, drama.
My mom be kissing niggas.
No, that is something that you said didn't happen to you.
You said your mom wasn't dating.
He doesn't remember.
You did, Block.
Enough Celsius is you forget anything.
But isn't that nice that even though your mom was single, that she just wasn't getting her cheeks rinsed through your whole comment?
She wanted to speak.
Come on.
I said she wasn't.
You just can't put those words in a safe sentence as Baba.
Even if it's good.
Do you want him to say she did?
No, I would never say she did because that's not true.
What I'm saying is she did not get fucking snow cut every day.
I don't see what's wrong with this at all.
That made me answer.
I don't see what's wrong with this.
She did not.
My mom's getting pecked up.
Whoa, whoa.
My mom's getting pecked up.
See, peck sounds nice and snowy.
Plow it.
Like, that's a little bit of a damn thing.
That didn't happen to your mom.
No, say what didn't happen to his mom.
See how he said.
My mom didn't get the battering ram.
Don't stand this.
Don't disrespect my dad.
Don't disrespect my dad.
No, no, no, that's right.
Your dad did it twice.
Bare mints.
At least.
Bare mints.
At least.
Twice.
At least.
Sal's mom wasn't getting dick punched in her forehead.
That is a true, factual thing.
Factually.
She wasn't getting nothing.
She had too much respect for herself to do that.
Mom, I'm sorry, mom.
Yo.
I'm sorry.
She wasn't.
She was not.
She respected you and herself too much.
Yo, bro.
You gotta chill.
You gotta chill.
What did I say?
All I know is that wasn't happening to your mom.
I can't even say it.
No, what was it happening to Boxball?
Because you need some snow too, bro.
I'm an orphan.
You got kids, dude.
I'm an orphan, bro.
No, Your mom was obviously raising a family.
She was.
Okay, and she wasn't getting stretched out like Gumby.
She wasn't.
That wasn't happening.
That was not happening.
That definitely wasn't happening.
That was not happening.
That wasn't happening.
Church Armstrong going on over there.
No, none of that.
Nothing at all.
No sister's just regular.
You know what I mean?
Your mom wasn't getting treated like Dawson.
That's all sad.
You know what I mean?
Your mom wasn't getting yoga flames.
What I'm trying to say is that's a good thing.
Y'all didn't go through what I went through.
Having to watch your mom do a waltz, get pecked down.
Yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
That's trauma.
My mom's watching this right now.
How dare you put me through that?
Did she kiss you after?
Probably.
Probably.
Yeah.
You don't know what this is like.
Where did she kiss you?
All your moms did nothing.
Where did she kiss you, though?
Y'all moms didn't receive not one sledgehammer.
You got another random dude.
Another guy on your lip.
You got a random dude.
My mom got at least one.
Yeah, your mom got at least one.
I'm not saying your dad's short dick.
Yeah.
I'm not saying that.
Yeah, you're not saying that.
So it's okay.
Your dad.
Yeah, because you're not saying it.
I'm not saying it.
Yeah.
That's all.
You see how that works out?
It's very simple.
I'm not saying that at all.
So Biden tweets.
Biden can tweet whatever he wanted.
Yeah.
You know?
Biden tweet whatever he want.
If he wants to show his wife, his wife was walking.
Yeah.
Slow walk, too.
What was that?
It was a slow walk.
It was a slow walk.
Everything's better than slow-mo.
Uh-huh.
Facts.
As your president, I'm not picking favorites, but as Joe Biden's husband, fly eagles fly.
I hate it when I'm fine.
That's fire.
You know what I fucking hate?
When like motherfuckers downplay their success to be a husband?
Like, like, I'm not the president.
I'm Joe Biden's husband.
It's like, you can only say that because everybody knows that you're the fucking president.
Oh, you mean like when you give like a Valentine's Day or happy birthday post?
Look at my post.
Look at my post, though.
Oh, you got to be able to do it.
Look at my post.
Come on, I'm ready for it.
I'm ready for it.
I know.
This motherfucker was there writing an essay yesterday about that's on the car.
Oh, my car was fire.
I thought that was the one.
And honestly, she didn't even react that much.
And I took it back and I started reading it.
Like, did I fucking misspell something?
This is a wrong card.
I literally took the card back from my wife and read it out loud.
Like, I don't think you actually read it.
I think you're too distracted by the flowers that you're not putting the time in.
What's up, boo?
Okay, look at this.
Happy birthday, my everything.
Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world.
I love you.
That's fire.
Okay.
He's identifying as somebody's husband.
You can only do that when nobody thinks that you're that.
The liberal cuck, bro.
That's just so.
So it's a flex.
You're just saying it's a flex.
Yeah, but he's also identifying himself as your president.
I'm saying it's fake humble.
He's doing the fake humble.
I'm saying he doesn't really think of himself like that.
And he knows that he's not that.
So he will present himself.
Hey, look at what he says.
He says, as your president.
That's a flex.
He says he's your president.
As your president means I am your president.
I'm just not picking a side.
Let me try to communicate this in another way.
Let me go at a few seconds.
That's my heart as flex.
That's why I was the top sweet, dog.
As your dad?
Yeah.
As your daddy, I'm not saying this.
And he's saying that to Elon.
No, he's reading this.
No stay-at-home husband is identifying as that.
That's why I'm saying it's a flex.
That's no.
He identifies as our president.
You understand that, right?
Fuck all of them, though.
Shifty.
Fuck all of that.
I just want to let you know from the bottom of my heart, fuck all of them, yo.
You know, liberal cucks by the lamestream media.
You know what I'm saying?
You're getting regulated by the lame stream.
You're getting brainwashed, dude.
Yeah, dude.
Are you just trying to bring comedy back?
Is that what I'm saying?
Yeah, that's all I'm trying to do is fucking bring comedy back, dude.
What the fuck?
The lamestream media has obviously got them.
You know what I mean?
And you know what?
The cancel culture is going to come get you one day.
That's what happens with canceled culture.
That's what they're shooting down to.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
It's going to eat you up.
It's going to fucking eat all three of you.
That is true.
All right.
So, anyway, I don't think Elon did anything wrong here.
If he wants to put his shit out the front, that's fine.
It's yours.
If you pay $44 billion for something, you guys do whatever the fuck you want with it.
This ain't New York real estate where they go, well, you can't renovate your bathroom without asking Mayor Adams for permission.
This is Twitter, it is his.
He could change the name.
He could do whatever the fuck he wants.
Do all that then.
Lean it.
Go all the way.
Go all the way.
He just needs better control of the troops.
Like, that shouldn't be leaking.
Yeah, that is true.
How does he do it?
I mean, death penalty.
Ooh.
I've been reading some dictator stuff.
You got to kill him out.
You got to appoint people, let them have a little bit of power.
The keys.
And you got to kill them.
You need your keys.
And you got to come.
And you got to kill one every once in a while.
Yeah.
That's what it is.
Who are you killing here?
No, This is a social media.
I'll kill Miles if he looks bored one more time.
Every time I look over there, Miles like this.
Is the podcast so boring you can't hold your head on your shoulder?
Miles got rest and board face, bro.
UFC Weight Class Controversy00:15:35
Holy shit.
Rest in board.
How are we supposed to be entertaining when Miles is over there trying to kill himself all day?
You need to rest your head.
This is how boring it is that he needs to rest his head like this.
We all have taken at least 12 fucking ounces of the ball.
You drink the last one.
Somebody get Miles Celsius, bro.
And we're going to get rid of your chair.
I'm going to stand.
You're going to have to stand the whole fucking podcast.
I'm tired of this.
There's extra gravity when we're talking.
So that's how Miles feels.
We're professional.
I need something to throw at this motherfucker that won't destroy canvas, but will inflict enough pain that he has to pay attention to what we're doing on this goddamn.
We got to get a nerf gun back.
We need a fucking Nerf gun back.
What happened to the Nerf gun?
Yeah, what happened to the Nerf guns?
Yeah, they got lost in the move in the migration.
When we were refugees from Brooklyn, we lost everything.
But we'll get it back.
Okay, well, listen, that's just one conspiracy.
I have another conspiracy.
Uh-oh, hit it.
Hit it.
This one is actually kind of serious, so I don't know how to approach it because there's big fucking, there's high stakes for this if it's true.
But there are some pictures that came out that showed Islam Makachev, the guy who just fought Alexander Volkanowski.
And Volk is our boy.
We love Volk.
We love Volk.
This is why we're talking about this.
Obviously, yes, we're biased.
We want to protect Volk.
But there's some images that came back that showed Islam with a bruise on a part of his arm where a vein would be.
Now, that bruise is a typical bruise for someone who has received an IV.
You are not allowed to rehydrate with an IV.
There's a two-year suspension for that.
They look at it like performance-enhancing drugs because, in a lot of ways, it is.
You've depleted your body with so much water to make weight, and now you found a way to get all that water back into it before the fight.
And the only way to do it at that speed is to just have it done intravenously.
Oh, yeah.
I did an IV drip the other day.
That shit was wonderful.
And you have a little sore on the arm?
Yep.
Okay.
So I look at these images and I was like, look, this could be Photoshops, right?
There's also a video from the UFC's embedded show.
Now, embedded is where they do the, remember the 24-7 Floyd Mayweather type things.
They follow the fighters.
So they have video of him.
I think it's before the fight, where you also see the wound.
I think you have the video, dude.
Yeah, I'll put it up right here.
So you also see the black and blue.
Now, he's also a boxer.
I don't want to say this is fact.
That's what I'm saying.
He's also not a boxer.
He's also a fighter.
You could get bruises.
Maybe that's a part that you got a bruise.
There are other options here.
The only problem is that there are rumors swirling that the woman that administered the IV has spoken to people and said that she did it.
Did he get the IV?
Do we know if it's in Australia?
Yeah, that's there.
Because Dan Hooker tweeted about it.
After like, it's, yeah, Dan Hooker tweeted about it.
After the weigh-in, so he hilger was like, Do you really think that you could get an IV in Australia?
We wouldn't find out.
I do actually think it's a big country.
I don't know, but they run.
You're fighting a hometown hero.
That's true.
You got to bring your people in to do that.
Now, I mean, to me, the only reason why I wouldn't believe this is because I can't imagine that somebody or somebody's team is so mind-bogglingly stupid that they would just risk it with a random IV company.
Also, the most disciplined people on the world.
Like, they're going to go on Google and be like, IVs in my area.
Send them over.
And also, you're the most recognized.
There's nobody that's got only beard hair here.
It's illegal.
Australia.
That lady probably works for Twitter too.
Snitching.
Snitching.
But she won't come out.
She's kind of like thorough.
They're basically like, yo, are you going to just come out and just say that he did this?
She's like, I don't want to deal with the backlash.
I don't want to deal with everything that's going on.
But I have spoken to some people that have, you know, I have on decent authority that they may have spoken to her and that's what's being claimed.
Now, this is huge.
One, the UFC does not want this.
You don't want a controversy about making weight.
Two, they would have to suspend him for two fucking years.
Yeah.
You don't want one of your stars that you're calling the pound for pound guy to be a cheat.
And then three, this not only tarnishes his legacy, but does it tarnish the whole camp?
Yeah.
You start looking at the rest of the people in the camp and then going.
How much does the IV do for you?
If you're cutting a lot of weight, think about how much you got to dehydrate yourself to be 15 pounds lighter than you normally are when you're already that fit.
Yeah.
And it helps in two ways.
One, all your cardio goes, not all, but a lot, your cardio significantly is reduced when you take all the water out of your body.
Your body's just so depleted.
But two, you're easier to get knocked out.
So your chin goes without that water.
So being able to rehydrate and get back to normal, be able to have the cardio, but also be able to withstand punches is unfathomably important in a fight.
Huge advantage.
And especially when you're a guy who's cutting weight to have an advantage.
Yeah.
That's why it's a two-year suspension.
Think about that.
I think for like a drug, it's one or even less.
It's such an advantage in a fight that the suspensions for two weeks.
Especially if you're coming up and he's coming down.
The one advantage you have is he's coming down a lot.
He's going to get tired.
He's going to get gassed.
Otherwise, if he can go right back to that level of strength and endurance, you're fucked.
It's going right back to that 30-pound advantage or whatever.
I don't.
As far as casting doubt on the rest of the camp, though, like what I'm saying, I don't necessarily do that, but what I'm saying is that's what happens.
Like when there's one cheat within an organization, you assume, like if Lance Armstrong is cheating, you're like, well, aren't all the Jose Conseco got popular steroids and was like, I was giving them to everybody.
That's just what you, and it makes sense.
You're like, yeah.
And then you're dealing with, like, that's why I'm saying if Islam did this, if, and this is a rumor, I can't confirm any of this.
And I'm also very like delicate with even saying these things because this is this person's livelihood.
This is, you know, he ended up getting a decision over a guy who's our boy that we love.
But at the same time, it's like, we got to be delicate with these rumors until it's true.
These are rumors, but there's a lot of evidence that looks like there's some shady ships.
And this is for sure.
Because I'm looking at some of these pictures and it looks like it could be camp pictures like from camp.
This video for sure is after the way in before the fight.
Yep.
Okay.
Because yeah, there is a spot there.
Because I was thinking some of those pictures could just be normal camp training gloves on.
I can't believe that they didn't just put some fucking I can't believe they didn't just put some what's it called on makeup or whatever I'm saying like wear a long sleeve shirt.
It seems so obvious that you would think that it's not that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's that's the other thing.
It's like if you were really worried or concerned about it, you would wear a long sleeve shirt.
You would try to hide it.
The fact that he's not trying to hide it almost makes me go like, okay, maybe this is a misunderstanding.
Maybe he got an IV for something else.
Maybe they had to take blood for a blood test.
Right.
Maybe Usada was like, hey, we need to.
And that nurse would kind of be smart enough to say, I gave him a blood test.
Exactly.
That's the only thing that's tricky.
But then we don't have a nurse, though.
Exactly.
There is allegedly a nurse who's saying that this did happen, but won't come out.
And that's a big fucking allegedly.
Yeah.
You know?
And it sucks because the fight was so incredible.
It's so, it like, it was just, you know, Volk is the man.
Amazing.
And I honestly, I'm not mad at the decision.
I kind of scored it 3-2 as well.
Again, I'm very much a novice, but I thought it all came down in the second round.
And I thought, novice opinion, he had more time with Volk on the ground, even though Volk wasn't like phased by it.
So I could be wrong, but that's how I had it.
It was just a great fight.
The fact that it was just so close.
It was like, I couldn't really tell at the end.
Yeah.
I wouldn't be mad either way, but with the decision, but there is a new way that we're going to have to look at scoring for fights, like just holding somebody in a dominant position without doing anything.
Like Volk was doing these punches and he was punching, what's his face, Mach Jeb behind his head.
Is there a lot of power on those punches?
Maybe not.
Would we like to get hit with them now?
Definitely not.
But to me, that's more damage than someone just being backpack and not inflicting any pain whatsoever.
So it's like, if you score those punches as more than the holding that person in a dominant position, then I see why you would give the round to Volk and then Volk wins.
Yeah, the scoring really dictates strategy.
That if you just have to be in a dominant or winning position for the majority of the fight, it's like, yeah, I'll just try to hold you.
Yeah.
I'll just work on ground.
I don't really need to work on striking, which is sort of the strategy of the camp, it seems like.
Yeah.
I mean, dude, Volk was just so impressive.
He's also just a classy dude.
And also, I would say Islam's response was also cool.
I thought both of them were.
I love that.
There was like a nice fight where they both clearly respect each other.
Even before round five, they dapped each other up.
Bro, bro, Volk.
I don't know if you guys saw this.
When Islam had his hand raised, the crowd started to boo, and you can see Volk in the background.
He's like, no, cut it out.
Going, yo, chill, don't do that.
Like, the guy's fucking pure class.
He really is.
But also, what he is is an unbelievable athlete that was bringing the pain to Islam.
Like, if that's a street fight, Islam's not making it home.
Yeah.
Like, he's exhausted at the end, looking for the clock every two fucking seconds.
Volk looks like it's the first fucking round.
Yeah.
Like, he's the smaller guy who couldn't be out-wrestled, couldn't be choked out.
All the things that Islam has just absolutely dominated people doing.
And it's like, this motherfucker is not to be played with.
And Islam gave it up to him.
Yeah.
100%.
What I will say about Islam was that his distance management was phenomenal.
I've never seen Volk look like he was extending himself too much to land a punch.
And granted, Islam is taller, but Volks fought taller guys.
But Islam managed the distance so well that when Volk was striking, he had to take real risk to get in there.
Yeah.
He was getting nervous.
Yeah.
And it's like, I got to give Islam credit at narrow gun.
But I think if they run it back, I think Volk wins that easy.
Yeah.
I hope he doesn't get suspended so they can run it back.
I hope that that's not true just for the sake of the sport and for the sake of Volk, like going in there against somebody who's got like an illegal advantage, like, and then losing that fight.
They would take away the L, but like, I'd rather you just didn't put your body on the line for somebody's hand.
It's like five months of your life for however many months the camp is for like, oh, it's all kind of bullshit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But it's also a good turnout for him, regardless, like, you know, omitting the conspiracy angle that you lose, but you lose on a technicality.
You lose on points, but you win in spirit.
Yeah.
And you lose in a fight that a lot of people, like Rogan, apparently thought Volk won.
Yep.
So that says something.
Yeah.
It's funny.
UFC is trying to call Islam the pound for pound number one now.
Yeah, I don't see that.
That was never up for grabs for him, in my opinion.
It makes Volk pound for pound if he comes up in weight and beats the bigger guy.
Yeah.
It doesn't make you be pound for pound if you're fighting the smaller guy.
You're defender.
This is actually Volk is going for the challenger.
Yeah, you get to keep your belt, but you don't gain more.
Yeah.
I think if you come up, you're taking the challenge.
And if you beat that person one division up, it's like, this guy is so trade-off is.
Of a lot to gain, but you're at a disadvantage because you're coming up.
Exactly.
It still makes you pound for pound if you're used to fighting at a certain weight and you have to drop more than you normally have to drop.
No, he doesn't.
He didn't.
He stayed at his normal weight.
Oh, okay.
I'm sorry.
I thought they were.
Oh, I thought he dropped more too.
Yeah.
No, no.
That's my thing with the IV thing.
Like, if he didn't come down more than he normally is, like, why is this recovery so much worse?
And why did he have to do this if this is normal cut?
And that's why I'm kind of like, I don't, well, that means he would be bigger than normal.
Yeah, he was probably, he either wasn't training as hard or wasn't monitoring the food as much.
Or what happens is as you get older, you start to hold on to the weight and cutting that water weight is fucking hard.
They say this with boxers.
It's like they used to be able to take off the 20 pounds in water weight.
And towards the end of their careers, they just can't do it.
They just don't shed.
So, I mean, the guy's probably been cutting weight since he was doing wrestling as like a fucking nine-year-old.
Yeah, eight-year-old.
Yeah.
So.
You know, when you talk about Volk's cardio, what I thought about, and obviously we love Izzy as maybe one of my favorite athletes in the world, but when he fought Jan, I think was his name, he went up.
Yep.
Jan just leaning on Izzy.
You can see Izzy get tired after rounds of that.
Yep.
And obviously Izzy's one of the greatest athletes on earth.
Volk had a similar thing, maybe not the same weight difference, but similar thing, just getting leaned on, getting held on the ground, and wasn't remotely fatigued.
He's mind-boggling.
I have a theory about that.
Okay.
He comes from Aussie Rules Rugby.
Right.
You talked about where he was weighing much more.
I think he was weighing over 200 pounds, but also they run like 10 miles a mile.
Non-stop running.
You'll never see guys that size with that good cardio.
They're just, even football is stop and go.
Yeah, sprints.
But the Aussie is constant, right?
So it's like, I think cardio for a guy like Volk, obviously he works really hard at it, but having that background where it was just non-stop.
And it's physical.
It's physical with cardio.
It's not like soccer where it's not only that physical.
Yeah.
But you're like tackling the fuck out of each other.
Yeah.
So the cardio for him, that's just what, yeah, it's just a lesser version of what I do.
And I'm lighter now.
Hell yeah.
I was 40 pounds heavier back then running like that.
Now I'm lighter.
This is light work.
I think weirdly in a loss, he solidifies himself as pound for pound.
You might be right.
It's the weirdest thing that happens, but it's like you came up, you fought the most dangerous guy in the UFC, so to say, and some people think you beat him.
Yeah.
It was without a doubt a very close fight.
You finished the fight in the dominant position.
But you can't take pound for pound until you do it.
Like just because you feel.
Well, he was number one is the thing.
I'm sorry to interrupt, but he's not trying to go from two to one.
He was number one, right?
So I think he holds his spot until somebody takes it from him.
I don't think Islam took it from him.
No, no, no, of course.
But I'm saying, like, if the whole claim is like, oh, double belt champ, pound for pound, you can't really be that until you do it, which if they rematch, I think he'll do it.
Oh, I didn't say he was the double belt.
Right.
But you're saying pound for pound.
And I'm like, you're not pound for pound until you win the fight against the guy in a different weight class to become pound for pound.
I don't know if that makes you pound for pound because he was pound for pound before when he never fought the guy in a different weight class.
But that was still easy to continue.
Basically, it's like you can't say who the most fighter is because the bigger fighters could just absolutely destroy a smaller fighter.
So pound for pound is basically saying this is the best person if we looked at all.
No, no, if we looked at all fighters almost equally.
Now we can't because heavyweights have such an advantage.
Like a heavyweight fighting guy at 155 pounds, one punch on the top of the head like a cartoon.
But a guy who's, but if we look at them evenly, like Floyd was the number one pound for pound.
He couldn't be a heavyweight, but he was so dominant within his weight classes that we go, his skill is the best.
Oh, shit, I've always looked at that wrong.
I thought pound for pound means like you've moved a couple of weight classes and you were the dominant person in those weights.
I thought you have to be at least two different weight classes to be pound for pound.
Oh, no.
But what happens is when you move weight classes, you prove your dominance.
Yeah.
So it helps it, but it's not a requirement.
It's like in basketball, if they did inch for inch, Allen Iverson might be the best player ever because he's 5'9 or whatever.
Oh, that's so fucking good.
Jordan's a better player, but Jordan was 6'6.
So like, it can't really measure those two.
So, you know, it would be like inch for inch in NBA.
So Pound for Pound is just like, it's an opinion type thing.
It kind of favors smaller guys.
It's an opinion thing that absolutely does.
Yeah, but UFC does do an official ranking for Pound for Pound.
Yeah.
Yeah, it seems like it's decided by people, though.
It seems like it started as like barbershop type shit.
And then UFC was like, why don't we just make this a thing?
Which is smart.
Yeah.
That's funny.
Boxing always thought it was an official thing that you can like see on paper.
Yeah.
All this ranking shit is, yeah, just humans deciding.
We love to rank stuff.
We really need organization.
Rap Sales and Jay-Z Rankings00:08:29
People love lists.
We love the fucking lists.
And if you're not on the list, it drives you crazy.
The billboard list.
The billboard list.
Exactly.
There it gets everybody talking every year whenever they put that up.
Is Ja Rule not top 50?
Like, let's just talk about it.
I looked at that list and I was like.
Is he not top 50?
Is this a joke?
No, I'm being serious.
Like, in terms of like the hits that he had, the sounds that he had, the run that he had, are there other people on that list that were like, yo, you weren't as influential as Ja?
It's just so hard because it's like a lot of the older rappers that I have like hardly zero feeling for because they were just before my time, but they made the list just because of how like influential they were in starting.
And you have to look at them within the context of the time.
So then it's like, yeah, Ja had a run, which was crazy, but you could say Fetty Wap had a Ja roll run.
He did not have a Ja will run, but he had a run.
Ja had a couple of runs.
No, Fetty had a run, but I'm not just, I'm not discounting Fetty's run as much as I am saying.
Let's remember Ja's run properly.
Ja had years.
And Fetty had a year or two that was like a summer that was fucking crazy.
And that's not to laugh at.
That's not easy to do.
That's lightning.
Yeah.
But Ja was not lightning one time, one album.
Venny Vettimici slapped.
Then he had the one.
He started to get into that pain in love shit or whatever it was called.
And I remember being like, this is rap.
Bro, I think that's why.
50 just like.
Yo, 50.
50's the GOAT, man.
Yo, it's so funny.
He actually spoke on this.
There was a clip somewhere.
We can probably find it.
But he spoke.
He was like, Ja is a nice kid from this good part of town that like went to, he basically like, what's the M ⁇ M 8 mile shit?
He's, you went to Cranbrook.
That's a private school.
And he's like, he basically was like, that's who you are.
And you make love songs and you're great at that.
And that is your lane.
But then Irv wanted to compete with the gangster shit.
They literally named the label Murder Inc.
And it's like, you ain't got no murderers here.
You have to associate yourself with your murderers.
And now you're being something that you're not.
And you're not going to beat somebody who actually comes from that at that game.
And it was a really interesting thing.
He's like, if he just stayed in that love music lane, I don't know if him and 50, if him and 50 actually beef beef.
50 will make fun of him.
Oh, no, but the beefing was because of music.
Oh, what was it?
No, that was a lot of street shit that was going on.
But that only happened because Ja and Irv got involved with some of the...
I've heard this and I forgot, obviously, forget everything.
What's the story with that again?
I'd have to.
Somebody knocked somebody out to get chain or some shit?
Yeah, it's like basically 50 had a crew.
The crew that Ja, that Irv was associated with.
Fuck, what's his name?
Damn, he was like a legendary gangster.
Not Supreme.
Supreme team.
There you go.
So then it's like 50 was coming up, selling drugs, whatever the case is.
They get into beef.
So now basically association, they just sent them after him.
But that's what fucking, and that's what 50 said.
It's like, yo, you chose up trying to be this hard.
You trying to keep up a hard image.
You need hard people to keep up a hard image.
You chose up with this crew.
You could have sung the love songs and then killed it.
Yeah, but then as hypocritical of 50 because he bodies him and then steals his style and does a bunch of muscles, right?
Remember JD Kiss's album is pure trash, nothing but love songs.
He said that about the second album, I think.
He literally made fun of his style and then did his style.
Yeah, which is genius brilliant.
Like, business mind, let me eliminate the competition for what they do and then slowly become that.
But take enough time that people forget.
And he earned his street shit.
I got shot nine times.
You're not going to call this guy soft.
You fucking crazy.
I sold drugs.
I did dirt.
I lived that life.
Yeah, he's like an amoeba, you know, just like swallowing the cell and then like just becoming it as well.
Whoa.
Yeah, 50 is on a different level.
But I do think both of them deserve to be in that.
Wait, 50 wasn't even a little bit of a bad thing.
No, 50s aren't.
50-17.
Josh's not.
I do think Josh is a good one.
I don't know how you rank.
I'm looking at so many people.
I'm not going to be somebody out of it.
Yeah, I'm looking at so many people like you should be higher.
Like, I, and again, we, I've said I'm not the biggest Drake fan.
Drake at eight, I was like, that eight?
Yeah.
He's a lot of guys won.
And I can't.
That's crazy.
I can't argue with it.
So I have him at eight.
I was like, wow, that sounds low.
Unfortunately, unfortunately, Drake at eight only because of the ghostwriting stuff.
If it wasn't ghostwriting stuff, he would be tied for one.
So no one has had a run like Drake.
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
Also, this looks like changes in five or ten years.
Yeah.
When Drake is 45, 50, it's different.
Now, the fact that Kendrick is six spas above him is kind of interesting because they're both peers.
Nas, and I got a lot of love for Nas is high, right?
But now we're just like, it's all personal preference then.
Because to somebody else, Nas should be number one.
But I'm a Nas head.
Like, I grew up on Nas.
When it was Jay-Z or Nas, I was like, Nas.
Nas all day.
Yeah.
So if Jay-Z's one and there was a time where Nas was ahead of him.
Okay.
Nas over Big seems a little bit wild to me.
Let me ask.
I'm a Nas fan.
I think the reason why you go Nas over Big is because of the amount of records.
The one thing about Biggie is it's two albums.
Yeah.
But that's not his fault.
It's not, but it is what it is.
It's like getting injured, you know, playing ball.
And it's like, ah, if he didn't get injured, he would have been the greatest.
That's why Andre These stacks are so low because I think he don't got the single albums and I don't have the single album.
At the skill of rapping, he's the best, maybe ever.
Yeah, he might be the better rapper out of everyone there.
Okay, question, question.
What was the impact of LL?
And was that even before me?
Because I don't remember LL being that huge earlier.
So LL was before you, but you still caught the tail end of the LL run.
Yeah.
But like, he was that dude.
So he was Drake?
Yeah, basically.
Okay.
So ladies loved him, dudes loved him.
Like, he had the game unlocked.
Because I remember him being an actor, and I remember him doing that.
And I remember I remember him going at Mom said, Knock You Out.
Do you remember that song?
Yeah, yeah, but he was doing it and doing it.
That was when he came back.
Yeah, exactly.
Who was the fucking guy that he went after?
Pat Poose.
Oh, no, cannabis.
That's right.
I thought cannabis won that battle personally.
Cannabis, he could fucking wrap his ass up.
But LL was just the bigger person.
So that's why.
Okay, okay.
So 50/17, who else?
Big Daddy Kane.
I don't really know who that is.
But that's like him, Rock him, like those guys.
That's my thing.
How do you evaluate influence versus objective run?
I think they're saying during their time that he was the Jay-Z of his time.
Like during his run, they were that big.
So that's why it's like you have to really put him up there because we can't just be like prisoners of the moment.
Right.
Yo, Tupac over Biggie is wild.
To me, a little bit as well.
Nikki Minaj over Nikki Minaj.
You know what I thought of it?
It sounds fucked up, but I think huge.
I think Nikki's huge.
I think you also can't have a top 10 with no women.
I don't think it, honestly, I don't think that's gender at all.
She was.
Nikki over Ye.
Yes.
Yeah.
At rap him, without a doubt.
But like she, but she was the she was bigger than Wayne has ever been.
She's bigger than Nikki Minaj.
I don't think you understand how big Nicki Minaj.
Look at like the amount of records sold or something like that.
I think it's like Eminem, Nikki.
Yeah.
Like that was the time she was doing arenas.
She had every woman in the world.
Yeah.
She also changed rap for women in general.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That I can believe.
Her outselling Wayne or being bigger than Wayne.
I'm just like, I can't fathom that.
I just looked at they're super close.
They're like roughly a few million from each other on sale.
There's like a specific album that she put out.
That probably has a ton more.
That is just like fuck.
What's it called?
But I think it almost pink Friday.
What's interesting though is if you go based off of records sold Eminem.
So according to this, it's like I love this.
This is my favorite thing.
So it's like Eminem, Drake, Kanye, Jay-Z, Lil Wayne, Nikki Minaj, and then number seven, Flowrider.
And I'm like, if you want to talk about run, people always bring up Fetty Wob, and I'm like, yeah, he's great.
But I'm also like, Flowrider has maybe the most hits of anyone.
I actually love Flowrider because Flowrider is what he is.
He doesn't pretend to be anybody else.
Also, I think if you tried to check him, he would, he'd be like, let's go.
Eminem to Flowrider Top List00:03:52
I'm fine with it.
He's raps pit bull.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Both from Florida.
Both from Florida.
Continue to put out.
Nobody's ever mad when the Flowrider song comes on and you're at the club.
At the beach bar, you're mad?
I don't want to hear that shit.
Welcome to my house.
If you drink in with your boys, that's not fun.
You're just at the beach club.
Oh, beach club.
Like the pool party.
Okay, now he's at a club.
I'm not putting a flow rider on when I'm at the bar.
Maybe the club a little different, but when you're at the pool party, the Vegas pool party, you could just play Flowrider.
Yeah, he makes Florida music.
It's inspired.
That's fine.
But it is like a lot of hits in a row.
It's kind of weird.
He got hits.
You got to give it to him.
Also, he got that crazy bag from.
Yeah, that whole thing is crazy.
Do you understand what happened with that?
Basically, he had a deal with them, and then they didn't come through on the deal, so then he sued him for like more than what the deal was worth.
Yeah, it was something crazy.
$80 million or something like that.
He was awarded like an $80 million settlement.
Maybe it was more from Celsius.
And I guess he was supposed to be like, he was supposed to get equity in the company or something like that for promoting it.
And he said that he did his end of the bargain, but they didn't pay him for it.
Oh, wow.
And he was supposed to be paid stock options and bonuses if the company hit certain sales markers.
He was awarded $82.6 million.
Now, are they actually going to pay that?
How does that work?
I have no fucking idea.
I don't know.
I have no idea.
I think a guy like that looks at this list and just chuckles.
It's like, okay, you can have your list.
I'm worth nine figures.
Oh, I have a conspiracy.
Do you think Ja Rule is like the perfect person to leave off?
He's going to talk about it.
You get more press.
People do think he deserves to be on the list.
Conspiratorial.
I think he's like, there's probably someone that was like, oh, yeah, Ja Rule's 45.
And someone else was like, no, no, no, no.
He's zero.
I got a good idea.
Like, you ever see Barcelona does that?
Like, Barcelona put out a poll.
It's like, it's like the greatest love movies of all time.
And then they'll put like Cars 2 as like number three just to get people pissed off.
There's a lot of like NDI accounts that'll do that all the time.
They'll make a list and it's like generally pretty good.
Then two of them will be like completely wrong just to get people fired.
There's a lot of like NDI accounts that'll say like, here's the tiers of players.
And then they'll put Shaq at like four just to be like, let's leave them alone.
Because they know Shaq's going to talk about it on inside the NBA.
To your point, when have we ever cared about Billboard top anything?
We barely care about the charts anymore.
Barely.
Top 50 greatest rappers.
I never...
Has Billboard done this before?
Not really.
Usually the complex does it.
Rolling Stone has their like that every time.
They just be the same.
The combo always works.
It always works.
It works every year.
But the one people pointed out was Laura Hill also.
I was thinking, Laura, I didn't want to say it.
She's in my top five ever.
Yeah.
Not enough work.
Maybe the crazy album.
Has a couple verses.
I'm going to say it's maybe the greatest album of all time.
You got to be up there.
That's how I feel.
I don't know.
And she got a couple verses on the score, the Foodies album, where you're like, God damn, she could rap.
She could fucking die.
But that's the Andre 3 Stacks thing.
It's like he has a bunch of verses.
I think she's the female 3Stacks.
A lot of times, I see them as like spiritual counterparts.
So the only knock I would give her is that she tried to make music after and didn't go.
She didn't take care of her voice.
I don't think that's it.
Three stacks right now.
You could put them on any song.
Whatever you want.
I literally think rap got too easy for him.
I really think he's just like, why am I doing this?
Yeah.
There was a good podcast with him and Rick Rubin.
Somebody talking about it.
I haven't heard it yet, but I heard that they get really into it.
He has a verse on a TI song called Sorry, where he actually kind of apologizes to Big Boy for like, Leo, man, I just wanted to rap.
I wasn't built for this fame shit.
I didn't like it.
I've had to step away.
He's like, apologizes for it in the verse.
I think it's mainly to Big Boy, but definitely Big Boy, like some of it's to him.
I got another conspiracy.
I was just about to ask you if you had one.
What is it?
Apparently, the Super Bowl is rigged, dude.
Oh, fuck, man.
Apparently, at the very end, I don't know if you guys saw this.
Eminem's Voice and Easy Rap00:15:48
They made a call, and some people said it wasn't holding.
Whoa, wow.
Now, what is the conspiracy?
This is just to bolster Patrick Mahomes' brothers' TikTok following.
Yeah.
Interesting.
That it's actually done by TikTok, by China to try to get one of their creators.
God.
If they want to kill off the city of Kansas City, they're going to eat a lot of celebratory barbecue and get them to die faster, getting fatter and fatter.
This is China.
There it is.
There it is.
I believe that that could be true.
I 100% believe that.
Kansas City doesn't need a train with hazardous materials.
You know what I mean?
They just have sugar and everything.
I really want to get to this hazardous.
I have a conspiracy about the train crashing.
We're doing it, guys.
It's new.
That was the only one in PA, right?
Yep, there's PA in Ohio.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, shit.
Hold on.
But before we get to that, I just want to let you know: everybody who gambled on the Super Bowl and won with BetOnline.ag, I just want to say you're welcome.
We told y'all to do it.
You know what I mean?
Use that promo code flagrant.
Also, you're welcome from picking the Chiefs.
I picked that.
Also, he picked the Chiefs.
You did pick the Chiefs.
Pick the motherfucking Chiefs.
Yeah, he was in on it.
No, I had nothing to do with it.
I was at home.
I have a perfect alibi.
I was at home, my apartment.
Sure.
And we're back.
Listen, we got to talk about these trains.
A little conspiracy.
First of all, I get upset when a train crashes because there's no reason for that.
Oh, that trainer.
Wait, what train we think about?
Like, people running trains.
Oh, you're done in Tennessee.
You talk about the train that didn't happen on any of your moms.
Was that?
What did you think was going to happen when he brought that?
Did you think it wasn't going to get tied back to moms in any way?
I'm dumb sometimes.
You like foresight sometimes.
Maybe it's a conspiracy.
Maybe you wanted him to bring it up.
No, Jilla.
I don't know.
Train chains.
I don't know.
Okay, so basically, there's these three train crashes in America.
There should never be a train crash ever.
You're in New York and you hate a train running late.
Facts.
Least favorite thing in the world.
I hate a train young age.
This is true.
Trains are getting stuck in New York, though, all the time.
They do.
But that doesn't make any sense.
They don't crash.
They don't bang into one another.
Never crash.
There's one road.
There's no reason you should crash.
It's one road.
But what if I'm not going to be able to do that?
I can't argue.
It's not like another train is coming.
What if a bolt comes loose?
Then what?
What do you mean a bolt comes loose?
Yeah, that shouldn't.
But you need a bolt.
That was a locomotive.
This is a locomotive flying.
But you're saying the bolt shouldn't get loose.
You literally have one rail to work on.
Have you not seen how they make the railroads?
The train is spinning like this, bro.
That's a wheel.
And you don't think a bolt on a wheel can get loose?
Nah.
It's just a wheel, bro.
It just goes.
Yeah, well, I didn't realize that.
It's locked in place.
Everything's good.
Florida.
Yeah, they're standing on no shit.
You don't see wheels fall off of cars.
You might see a tire burst as rubber, but the metal wheels and just spin off a car because a bolt's not tight.
Okay, so is this a terrorist attack?
And we won't acknowledge it.
Exactly, because we don't want to be like, yo, China is fucking us up.
And I mean, it's just a little peculiar that like all three of the trains got fucking poisonous shit on them.
Like, how much poisonous shit are we sending?
That's a great point.
Every train got poison on it?
Three for three?
Three for three.
Wait, hold on, hold on.
Let's back it up.
You're telling me that you believe the majority of trains that are traveling in America are traveling with poisonous chemicals.
Well, what do you count as poisonous?
You think there's a car full of poisonous chemicals?
I think every train maybe has one.
Have you ever seen a train go by?
It's like mad cars.
Have you ever been on a train?
Yeah.
Most trains are not carrying people.
Most trains are carrying people, Mark.
Well, of course, as a conductor.
Holy shit.
I'm saying, you see a whole train go by, it's mostly cargo and poison.
Yeah.
No.
Yeah.
Can we fact chat?
I'm used to Amtrak.
No.
Amtrak is what I was saying.
Amtrak is like 10% of the trains.
Can you fact chat?
I don't know if you believe that.
I like this.
Because I don't know if he does either right now.
He's stalling right now with a laugh.
He's like, I don't know if you believe that.
Is it?
I do not know if you believe that.
That's a fact because I thought the same thing.
Then I looked it up and I was like, oh, I...
Oh, you thought the same thing.
He's shitting on your conspiracy theory.
He's like, hey, been there, done that.
I turned eight years old and I was like, oh, wow.
Not all trains have people.
I turned eight years old.
Oh, that was a shot.
That was definitely a shot.
It did.
The fact that he's telling me it's a shot.
He thinks you're stupid.
Isn't that crazy?
He needs to be just now.
You don't think he's a dude?
He's just trying to double down on that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Why do you think he's so dumb?
Why do you think he's stupid?
This is like a really fucking mean thing to say.
This guy's a real house.
He's really a bully.
Okay, go look up the statistics.
1.7 million carloads of chemicals are shipped through America.
How many million carloads are on a train every year?
We're talking about majority.
Out of how many carloads?
Is it more people on trains or more chemicals?
I'm just kidding.
There's more than 1.7 million people taking an Amtrak every year.
I'll tell you that.
Yeah, of course.
Way more trains have people than have chemicals.
It's not even close.
What world do you live in where we're just transferring chemicals all the fucking time?
Oh, I thought we were comparing cargo trains to passenger trains.
Yeah.
But his point is.
If we're doing that, I think there's more cargo transportation.
But his point, if you go to the trainer.
Oh, there's way more people trains than cargo transits.
All right, let's just see.
Let's look that up.
I don't know how to really look that up.
I'm a fucking shit.
I look this up already, Mark.
What the hell is the fucking thing?
Do the fucking research.
Punch him in the fucking head because he's closer to you.
Sometimes I really want to.
Fucking dumbass.
I did some research.
What is America?
It's just a poison factory?
Is that what that's what we do?
We just transfer poison around the poison, bro.
Gasoline's poison.
Stop it.
Drink some gasoline.
Everything's poison.
Drink some gasoline.
Everything is kind of poison in that Celsius because that shit got to be a big deal.
That's my point, bro.
Everything's kind of poison.
Everything is messaged.
I don't want this argument.
Everything is poison.
I want...
He's moving the goldfield.
He's moving the fucking goalposts.
I'm just right on multiple jumps.
Help us out.
Everything's poison.
No, no, no.
You're a good researcher.
There has to be a car, and the car got the skull with the X's on it.
That's what I'm doing.
Like a pirate?
You're talking about pirates.
You're talking about a pirate train.
It gotta be a pirate train.
If it's not a pirate train, then it's not fucking poison.
You're thinking of a pirate train.
I need that.
I need that.
That's it.
That's it.
I also don't think 1.4 million car loads or whatever is that much relative to how many there are training every year.
That's a small percentage.
Yeah, but he's saying three train crashes, all of them three for three poisonous material falling out.
Where the train crashes without poison.
There's a ton.
They just don't report on that.
That's my thing.
So there's 1,700 train derailments a year.
Yeah, 40%.
So derailment is not a crash.
That's a crash, bro.
But even if it's derailment goes off, that's not.
I'll be honest with you, Akash.
And I want to be on your side because fuck them forever.
Yeah.
So just try to say a different thing.
Saying a derailment is not a crash.
Come on.
Well, I feel like they could be jacking up the statistics.
Oh, a train got stopped and it should not have.
So you can come over.
You can come over with us.
Yeah, yeah.
We got to get over here.
You can.
We got to derail.
I mean, if train stops and we got to get off, is that not a derailment?
He's derailing his cobblestone.
And I'm on the side because it's fucked up both of y'all and Miles forever.
A little bit.
But, Mark, can you figure out the information?
You got no shit.
You Google like a boomer, bro.
You really do.
That hurt him.
That really hurt him.
He identifies as someone who Googles fast.
That shit really bothered him right there, man.
Come on, bro.
You ain't got no comeback.
4 million.
Tell him he Googles.
Shut up.
4 million carloads of coal alone.
So 1.4 million poisonous shit ain't nothing if it's 4 million.
Does coal ain't poisonous?
We are comparing cargo trains to passenger trains.
That's what we are going to do.
No, no, no.
This is about the original conspiracy.
Poison?
Run it back.
Also, Amtrak only runs through the Northeastern Corridor.
Poison versus people.
I don't want no PlayStations on a motherfucking train.
Yeah, it's car.
Poison.
Peter.
He said it's mostly people.
I said it's mostly not poison.
No, but he's right.
The original arguments.
I don't.
The original argument was: this seems like a conspiracy because why would three crashes happen?
All of them got poisoned.
And then you said, and you guys were like, that's trains.
That's trains.
He said that.
Well, it's not poisonous.
Cargo trains.
That's not a problem.
I don't remember.
And Mark.
Speak the fuck up.
I'm Googling, Al.
God damn.
Slowly.
There's 1700 derailments that happen all the time.
They all got poisonous.
A bunch of them have poisonous shit, and we never bring it up because we're just like, yeah, let those people get poison.
The poison still catches fire.
It was just PVC and then it caught fire.
Why couldn't you look that up?
You fucking schmuck.
He's on my team.
Yeah, why did you see this 20 minutes ago?
Why is he even Googling?
I don't know, son.
Also, lightness and shit on fire don't make it poison.
Wood ain't poison.
Yeah, exactly.
But this shit was.
It's a chemical that when it catches fire, it's a chemical that makes PVC and when it catches fire, it's very bad.
Go on Arcash's team.
That's my main news.
Three in a row.
Yo, me talk this shit.
If it just derailed, it wouldn't have been bad.
It caught fire.
That motherfucker didn't say shit.
When I asked him if the lights are on before every podcast, he just goes, yeah, and none of the fucking lights are on.
That's what he just did.
He did a knee-jerk Miles response, which is like, what are you doing now?
One episode, Arkash was sitting in a fucking dark.
And Miles said, he's right in my dark.
He's brown, bro.
No.
He is just brown.
But this, he's sitting in the fucking dark.
I go, Miles, can you put the goddamn light on Akashios?
That's how the lighters ever.
Google faster.
I don't know what to Google, and this is close.
You need to make the test bigger, you fucking boomer, bro.
Those who can't Google are afraid of the truth.
Those who can't Google are afraid of the truth.
You know, I'm remixing Bill Clinton, but those that can't Google are afraid of the truth.
Look at that.
And if you're showing me what you're looking at, that's right there.
That's the last of us.
That's how they mess it up.
What you need to do is show how many trains have poisoned.
Skull bones.
1.4 million carlos.
Miles, look that up.
I don't want to hold this catches on fire.
It's poison.
Okay, everybody shut the fuck up.
Dove is talking.
You said it wasn't.
I got to say something that I like.
Come on, freight trains moved 2.2 million carloads of chemicals in 2021.
So that's the most recent.
We don't know if the chemicals are bad.
Poison chemicals are bad.
Chlorine?
Bad.
Yeah, that's terrible.
That's horrible.
Why would you name the worst chemical?
That's all.
That's a bad thing.
Fuck you, pool boy.
Water got.
Now chlorine's bad.
You was filling up them little kiddie pools full of fucking chlorine.
That's why he's colorblind.
He's colorblind.
It was vinyl chloride, which is a similar thing of chlorine.
Oh, and it was cool.
He just eat it.
You could have slammed Doug and you just came in.
I hated that.
I hated what he just did right there.
He just fucking, I hated that.
Skating face and slamming in my Gucci.
He had his slammed duck, but he went for the finger roll.
I know where he did.
Why are you talking carbons?
And shut the fuck up.
This one is freight lines.
This one is Amtrak.
That's why you took off your knit sweater, you piece of shit.
Son, you yelled and said the most boring shit yelling I ever heard.
I never heard anybody yell so boring.
But most people travel to go on airplanes.
They don't take trains, bro.
Shut up.
Doug?
That's a fact.
So look at this.
Don't bring up another stack and nobody arguing.
Freight lines?
You're bringing up a stack, nobody arguing.
You just googled some shit that nobody gave a fuck about.
Look at that.
Which one fucks that?
Amtrak or fucking poison.
This is the poison map.
Poison.
Poison.
This is literally the poisonous map.
Look at that.
The green is poison?
Everything.
Poison.
That's not all poison.
How would you know?
You didn't even go.
Poison goes on the same tracks as the non-poison.
That's not true.
But I got to separate the poison.
There's passenger lines and there's freight lines.
That ain't true.
He's wrong there.
He's wrong now.
Take that.
I'm lying.
He's lying.
There are some people.
You got all the information on your lap.
You have it on your phone.
Google it.
Google it.
Fuck it up.
I don't know.
You don't even need this.
You're not using the pattern anyway.
What the fuck is the point of that?
I'm fucking into the mainframe.
Damn, let that shit run out already.
Keeping your goddamn legs warm.
It's the AC solo.
Fucking Miles.
What do you think is more?
How do you think that there's more cargo?
There's more people in cargo.
You're poison.
Your face is poison.
You're poison, dude.
Okay.
How do you think that girl is poison?
Who is that?
Where is he on the top 50?
Never trust a big button to smile, Miles.
Never.
Never, ever.
That should get you, bro.
That should get you.
I'm not a big buddy.
You are a big button to smile.
You are.
Never trust a big button to smile.
You know what?
I'm on TV.
What the heck?
You guys are caving in.
You got an anecdote.
You got a fat ass and a.
Okay, smile.
That's aggravated.
You can't double up compliments.
Yeah, I know.
That's too much.
That's crazy.
I know.
I know.
Come on.
It ain't even that nice.
All right, listen, kid.
Can we figure out what's going on with the trains, though?
Because now you try to undercut the whole shit.
Dove normal.
Dove had to do it.
There's a lot of chemicals being transported.
I'm saying, unfortunately, it is normal.
Unfortunately, it is normal.
I don't, that's, what does that even mean?
How many times have you seen a train crash?
That's so vague.
$1,700 a year.
How many times have you seen a break?
I don't believe that statistic, be honest with you.
1,700 train crashes a year?
I don't know.
I don't know about it.
Can I just say...
Five train crashes a day, none of us know.
Almost as a politician don't care about.
Hold on, hold on one second.
You think politicians will tell him everything, bro?
She.
Liptard.
We.
I might be a liptard.
I'm a liptard.
Listen, I want to talk about.
I want to talk about retards for a second.
I want to talk about retards for a second.
We've been judging these autistic kids for wanting to watch trains all the time.
If it's a crash five times a day.
Whoa.
We're missing out.
That's Dan NASCAR.
That's way more cool than NASCAR.
These motherfuckers get to walk out the NASCAR.
Or maybe they know something.
And they're just watching the show.
And then they don't tell anyone.
How the fuck does every autistic kid see every plane crash and never tell their mom?
Plane crash.
Train crash?
What did I say?
You know what the fuck you just said?
I don't know anything.
I need something to inflict pain on the group.
On the group.
What is this guy looking at?
What is he fucking looking at?
Train statistics.
I'm autistic.
What the fuck is he looking at?
Is he reading a book?
What is he doing over there?
God damn it.
Come on, Miles.
Come on.
God damn it.
It's hard to Google this shit.
Oh, it is.
It is.
It is because they're hiding the search.
They're hiding the fucking search.
I believe there's a conspiracy going on.
There's a conspiracy, man.
I don't believe 1,700 train derailments a year.
All right.
Let's talk about another thing.
Okay.
What is it?
Oh, a different thing on the show.
Lee now, one more thing.
Not only have I been watching Last of Us, I'm also keeping up on the video game.
Oh.
Are you going to stream that video game?
I don't know how to do that.
Okay, well, someday.
I also don't know how to put my AirPods on it, so my wife just be waking up with me going, fuck.
Well, that's like two in the morning.
AirPods don't make your voice less.
That was odd that you think you put on AirPods while she can't hear you.
So she doesn't hear it.
You are so stupid.
Yeah, that was an interesting way you think AirPods work.
Well, you think you put on AirPods and you're thinking you wanna?
And you'd be like, oh, my bad, I'm wearing AirPods.
Deaf Hockey Player Script Twist00:05:17
I thought you couldn't hear me go, fuck.
Hey, listen, guys.
Every once in a while, you say some dumb things on a podcast.
Okay?
That was a dumb one.
I'll give you guys that.
That was pretty goddamn dumb.
Pretty god did.
Yeah, it was.
It was.
Fucking you guys.
Dude, it's like pain on the grill.
You guys, dude.
What are you smelling?
You guys are just fucking disgusting, dude.
You guys are just disgusting.
Dude, we can hear you.
You don't have your AirPods.
Why are you doing that?
It hurts our feelings.
Do you think that would make you cry?
I don't know what I was trying to say, Miles.
It's because the game is so loud.
It's just screaming zombies.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Love the game.
You try to bail me out.
Yeah, you did.
I said some dumb shots.
I said some dumb shit.
Okay.
That was on me.
That's my bad.
I do play the game, and I do live in a house with my mom.
What is this?
What is come on?
I'm living in the trailer with my mom.
No, I've been playing this game.
I'm obsessed.
I'm 39 years old.
I'm playing fucking video games again.
And it's just like, I'm so glad that I took about 15 years up, maybe 12 years off of video games.
I would not have accomplished anything if I was playing video games.
Or maybe I'd be like a really big gamer, but I would not, I'm being dead serious.
I love playing this video.
How happy would you have been?
You know what I mean?
If you had played every video game, you'd be pretty happy.
Yeah.
Just a phenomenal show.
Did anybody notice that the mushroom clean made him not deaf anymore?
Or not didn't make him deaf, but like the way that he spoke in, he didn't speak like a deaf when he was sick.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
No.
He was just yelling.
But he screeched after he became a.
Yeah, but he didn't screech like, like, he screeched the exact same as the other people who were infected.
But he also didn't hear her initially because she had to like tap him to get him to turn around and attack her, right?
Yeah, that's true.
But when he flipped, he didn't sound like that.
That's what I was waiting for.
He changed his voice.
Yeah.
Yes.
It really takes over.
Yeah.
Isn't it great that she was like asked his name when his back was to her?
Knowing full well that he can't understand a single fucking thing that she has to say.
Yeah.
But deaf people can scream, though.
Yeah.
They wouldn't know.
Do they know what it's like to scream?
That is a great question.
I think so.
Yeah.
Because their vocal cords still work.
They just can't hear the sounds they're saying, so they don't know.
But they don't know what that volume is.
They don't know the difference between screaming and whispering.
They just know how to fix hearing.
I think they can feel it by the way.
But just emotionally, you're just happy.
You have the impact.
Yeah, yeah, I think.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Have you guys all caught up on the show?
Yeah.
Fantastic on the last episode.
So good, man.
And I thought like the way they're kind of having her kind of, you see her kind of get jaded and it's kind of sad.
Like at the end, when they bury the bodies and she just like walks off on it, doesn't even really take it in.
You feel bad and you also kind of see like he feels bad that she's becoming as jaded as him.
And I thought that was like a really cool moment where he's like, it's almost like he's looking at his daughter becoming something that he can't help her with, but like he wishes wasn't happening.
Yeah.
Because he's trying to protect her from all of it.
Becoming him.
Yeah.
Like life has made him incredibly hard.
Yeah.
And he doesn't want to, you know, let people in.
He doesn't want to develop these emotional relationships with them because of how painful losing his daughter is.
And now all of a sudden he's developing this love for this little girl.
So it's like having a daughter again, but he's seeing the daughter become him, coarse, hardened by this reality.
It's got to be heartbreaking.
Yeah, it's just brilliant.
And playing the game, the game is fucking great.
Did you like that they made him deaf?
Because in the game, he's not deaf.
He's not.
But then they made that choice.
I think one of the actors is the one that made it.
Did you think it added to the story?
Was the kid actually deaf?
Yes.
Yeah, he was.
So I think he's probably the one that made the choice.
Yo, that's your point.
Today's not your day, guys.
It really is not.
Yeah, that's true.
It's hard to be smart all the time.
It's a hard thing to do being smart.
You gotta pass the ball.
You know what I mean?
It gets tough all day.
You know what I mean?
But listen, you just gotta just say it with your chest.
Go out there, full confidence.
Sometimes you stick the landing, sometimes you don't.
That was the game, though.
That's just all it is.
It was just straight bullshit.
Like the sentence that he just said.
What do you say?
I think one of the actors made a choice to play deaf.
Like it was the biggest crack of bullshit.
Then we watched the actors.
Maybe it was the director.
No, the actor didn't make the choice because they had to write lines for it.
Like they had to write the script around a deaf person.
Right.
Yeah.
It was one of the writers of the producers.
I guess I thought it was.
You see how that makes a lot more sense, right?
Yeah, 100%.
Yeah.
So they then hired a deaf kid who also plays hockey, great hockey player.
Kayvon Woodard.
Yeah.
Word?
He plays hockey?
Yeah.
Oh, he's nice.
We about to take over hockey.
He might take over hockey.
That's great.
Got it.
It's taking too long.
What?
Just too cold.
I thought we would have taken it over.
Considering he's not an actor, I thought he was actually great.
If you like, he's a kid playing this role.
And he's fucking awesome.
But the older brother was fucking.
I don't know.
Oh, so I think he stole the... Toronto?
Huh?
Did you sense Toronto accent?
I didn't sense anything.
The older brother, did you not?
Oh, no, no.
Island Survival Without Raiding00:04:27
I was just happy that he wasn't.
You might be right.
I just didn't pick up on it.
I was just annoying, bitch.
Who?
The fat bitch that was leading.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, so happy.
She was so annoying.
Oh, great.
Because that was like the most unbelievable part.
Just like them listening to her.
Why, why, why?
Because she's there, like, crying in her old family house and shit like that.
That's not a leader.
Dirty.
Yeah, but she didn't do it in front of everyone.
Yeah, still.
And also, I thought it made sense that her brother was the one that was like this great man, whatever, trying to help.
And then he gets killed.
And then she's just angry and is killing everybody and leads a revolt.
And they're like, all right, we're with her.
Her anger got us.
And that's what that guy said.
Basically, your anger got us more results than your brother's love.
So we're with you and your anger.
Whatever your decision is, even if it's angry, we rock with you.
Where would you guys hold up?
Let's say it happens right now.
Son.
And we have the ability to go wherever we want to go.
That's a good thing.
There's a private jet gassed up right now at Teterborough.
Got to be on an island, right?
Like a remote island.
Yeah, but then you're going to start trying to find your own food and shit like that.
Wow, you can fish though, right?
Tip tons of fish.
You have to learn all that shit.
I think if it came down to dying or learning, you would learn.
I might not.
Y'all would.
Did you put out?
Did you put out the episode with the free diver guy yet?
No.
No.
When is that one coming out?
Like two weeks.
We're going to be a little bit more.
Just before the Thomas.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
I think you can spearfish.
Because he does that.
He spearfishes all the time.
Yeah.
So Mark has this episode coming out with a guy.
What's his name?
William Truebridge.
And this is crazy.
He like can hold his breath for like eight minutes.
He has these fucking eight minutes.
That's crazy.
And not just sitting down, swimming and like doing shit.
That's going to the bottom of the ocean.
Crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then catching fish and then only eating the fish.
Yeah.
So he sustains himself just with whatsoever he has, like kids, a wife, whatever.
And so Mark was breaking it down to me.
There was a really cool thing.
It's like, tell the thing about him like sitting in the cave to meditate.
This shit puts forth.
This guy literally, like for fun to like clear his brain, he'll go down like 50 meters and go lay in the bottom of a cave, just like chilling in the Bahamas, just like clear his mind, stay focused underwater for like five or six minutes.
And then one time he's laying under there and all of a sudden he like sees kind of a flashlight out of the corner of his eyes and all of a sudden two scuba divers grab him and start shaking him because they think he's dead.
And he wakes up and goes, what the fuck?
And then they thought he was dead and he's like, no, I'm good.
I'm chilling.
And they go, oh, sorry.
And then he swims out.
But like, he's literally just laying there in the bottom of a cave in the darkness, just like clearing his brain.
And I don't know who should be more scared.
The scuba divers seeing nobody.
We just found a dead guy.
There's kids with him and shit.
Yeah.
Or the guy that wakes up and like in his fear goes and like accidentally fucking.
That'd be my concern that you like spit out all your air because somebody's fucking yeah.
But he can lay in there for like four or five minutes and then just pop out and grab some air from the scuba divers.
By the way, Lamar Johnson from Last of Us, Toronto.
He is from Toronto, right?
Oh, I got that accent.
Okay.
So, so, so the reason I bring that up is because we could sustain ourselves on fishing.
Yeah.
And there are parts of the world, the Bahamas.
Okay.
And then maybe we have some protection with the island, et cetera.
But there are limitations, obviously.
You're not going to have medicine.
You're not going to have access to food outside of the fish.
You're not going to have access to.
But you're not going to have access to any of that anyway.
But you could like, well, it depends.
Depends where you are and what you have to raid.
Because eventually we're going to run out of shit.
We're going to have to do raids.
That's just the reality of the matter.
So we need to be close enough to a place where we can raid.
Yeah.
You know?
But I'm almost like, I feel like it's better off mentally to not even have that as an option.
Like if you're constantly thinking, like, oh, we can go raid this thing, we can go raid this thing.
Mentally, it's like, it's like burning the boats.
Like, once you get on an island and you're just chilling there eating fish all day, and you know you're not going to get attacked, but you also know, oh, I can't just go raid someone for like pills or raid someone for whatever the fuck, then you can focus on actually living on the island.
So my concern about the island is hurricane season.
I was going to say, you got to think like weather, weather pattern.
This is really important.
I'll take that.
I'll take that.
I think you got to take your chances.
Those fish will still be there.
And the game, and I don't want to give anything away from the show, but like in the game, there's some people that built a kind of like city around a, it's a, it's like an electric dam.
It's not electric, but the dam provides electricity.
They essentially dam up a river and that the hydroelectric dam is the hydroelectric dam.
Yeah, thank you.
They have that in Tampa.
Okay, so it's like making your city around a source of electricity that doesn't require gas could be super valuable because you're going to want some fucking electricity, especially if you're going to try to like salvage society.
Hurricane Season Geography Concerns00:04:16
You're going to run out of batteries.
You're going to run out of gas.
You're going to run out of all these other things.
The grids might go down, but that river ain't going to stop pumping.
So why they built those cities in the first place there?
Of course.
Well, also because I think the trade routes were on the river, right?
Yeah, I guess that's the question.
Do you want to try to build around existing infrastructure and try to like maintain the semblance of society you had before or just completely restart?
I think you've got to go to a remote place because what they're always worried about is other humans from neighboring places.
Eventually it's not the zombies.
It's the fucking thing.
Yeah.
So I'm like, completely restart.
It's kind of go to an island and at least at the very least, if other people are coming, you see the fucking boat and you can handle it from but you can't see the boat on the whole island.
Like I guess what you could do is like build some sort of tower structure in the middle and then one person is always there and they're always looking at who could land.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I'm just going to become a zombie.
I kind of feel no one's happy.
Everybody's like, every day you're nervous, you're offending face.
Like, that's no way to live.
I mean, just be a cool zombie nigga.
Nah.
Maybe I get to the point that I'm one of the big guys and shit like that.
That's fine.
That's not even you, though.
That's just your body getting hijacked.
Yeah.
You're having a part of that situation.
It don't matter.
Yeah, it does because then you're gone.
That's what I said.
That's what I'm saying.
I don't want to live like that.
I think I do.
That's stupid.
You don't want to live in the fear and the anxiety is what you're saying.
And I get that too.
Everybody you love is going to die.
And I think I said this, but the book that I Am Legend was based on is kind of about that.
Like, is it worth living if you're the only person really left and everybody else seems dead?
Like, what's the point of going?
Is it worth it?
And I kind of like, at a certain point, no.
Yeah, I don't do so.
No, I won't see it.
That's worth it, bro.
So then, what squad are you linking up with?
Because you got to link up with a squad.
That's the thing.
It's like, I would love, you know, to develop one.
I'd like to make one, but there are advantages, obviously, for the islands.
Make a squad.
Hell yeah.
The raiders are coming.
They might come.
I ain't gonna lie.
Yeah, there's gonna be a lot of shit tired.
Yeah.
Yeah, a lot of shit tired.
It would be good, though.
Like, nah, I'll be fun to survive with.
So that'll be fun that you make a squad and then people come and just pillage your shit and kill all people.
Unless you're pillaging.
Are you down for that?
Exactly.
We ain't show for that life.
I don't want to.
That's what I'm saying.
I don't want to do that.
But what if we create?
What if we do it off an island?
Or what if we do it off?
It's like a comedy club.
You know what I mean?
It makes it money.
It's the best medicine, bro.
But if people hear about it, motherfuckers are coming.
So laugh.
Okay, what about if we do it?
We've been trying to get people to come to shows for years.
This is actually ideal.
What about if we do it off of an aircraft carrier?
We basically find an aircraft carrier.
There's a lot of mainstream.
This is loyal.
This was in a movie, Water World, but it was a tanker.
A tanker, remember?
This is a lot of smokers.
You're dealing with waves and shit.
I don't know.
I don't know how to run it.
In World War Z.
And don't you still need like Israel becomes a great hub?
Yeah.
Good at security.
And Cuba, too.
Cuba's nice.
Nobody's even affected there because nobody could get in.
So we could look for the place that's not affected and then see what's going on, but eventually people get there.
I'm just saying there's got to be a way that we could like curate a place that's easy to defend, that's easy to defend.
I mean, these places have to exist already.
Yeah, you got to go by geography.
Like you got a couple mountains here, you got some water here, you got a trade route.
I think you go back to like original, the original like great cities and towns.
The reason they were able to develop is they would defend themselves.
Yeah, this is like 90% geography.
St. Louis.
Say that.
St. Louis, like at one point, had a huge population, way bigger than it is now, but because at the time it was like one of the great cities, right?
American cities.
Because it was on the river, you're saying?
Yeah.
Some of these cities that are like very waterbound might become now.
Can we can it defend itself?
That's the question.
St. Louis can defend itself.
Well, the people.
I promise you.
St. Louis can defend itself.
The people, but once everyone's gone, I don't know.
You need a couple mountains.
You might need some mountains, or you might need to create that city in the mountains, like on some Machu Picchu shit.
Yeah.
Like, who's really going to climb up there, see what's going on?
It's like such an investment to get up there.
But once you are up there, as long as there's enough shit to eat and you can build yourself a little society, bro, you can just go live in the pyramids.
And then 100 years goes by, your kids are like, Dad, what are these?
And you're like, oh, I made them.
And then you can just hijack history.
Sucks.
And then all of a sudden, you just star with a huge head start.
That's sick, actually.
Yeah, I think that's the move.
It might be the vibe.
Be Egyptian about it.
Zombie Cities Defend Themselves00:01:16
Yeah, exactly.
Just steal it.
Anyway, Last of Us Fire.
Ghost of that.
Question: Do they explain that fucking giant zombie that pops up at the end?
Oh, the bloater.
The bloater.
They say that after a while, if you've been affected for a while, that's what you start to look like.
Yeah.
And you're way more dangerous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you start getting bulletproof.
Yeah.
Yeah.
See?
I'd be one of them, dudes.
It's not you, though.
Nah, it's me.
I bet you still haven't fit it in.
Yeah, bro.
That's accurate.
Why is it boring of shades?
For no reason.
I think one of the things that the episode does, or the show in general, does really well that a lot of other post-apocalyptic movies don't is that it has an element of hope still.
And that's what was so profound about her character.
She embraced the fact that she is potentially the future for this world.
And then they capitalized on that and, you know, twisted on that.
Yeah.
No, she's a beast.
Okay.
All right, guys.
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