Aba and Preach dissect the Joe Rogan hit piece, arguing that retroactive accusations ignore historical context while benefiting binary politics. They contrast the Canadian Freedom Convoy's principled stance with American cynicism, then explore wealth dynamics from Jeff Bezos' yacht bridge to biohacking conspiracies. The discussion shifts to identity politics, analyzing how information overload drives profiling against figures like Awkwafina and T-Pain, ultimately suggesting that rigid cultural categories fail to capture complex human experiences in an era of rapid social change. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Machete Story Context00:14:28
How many people do you think I made leave your show?
5,000.
It was how many?
It was 15.
It was 15,000 or how many?
It was 28,000?
The official California.
Well, shit, I thought it was 15.
We put 15 on the YouTube video.
All right, man, it don't matter.
It matters to me.
Update the thumbnail, bro.
28 sounds way crazier.
There's a whole lot of motherfuckers.
Yeah.
You know what's funny when we booked you for that shit?
We were telling them to book you.
They're like, who is he?
I'm like, don't worry about it.
Cap.
They just haters.
They just haters.
That's what it was.
It was early.
They just haters.
It wasn't early.
I had already done the festival.
The dude who ran the festival is the guy who's still running the festival.
He went on the English side.
You were hired by the French side.
Yeah.
You did not know.
When you were on our side, you did not do just for laugh.
You did just pour.
Yeah.
Raise your laugh.
Wait.
Exactly.
Don't do that, Mark.
We've been working for Lawrence American for the last two years, and we know each other.
That French is decent, man.
Watch it.
That accent was decent.
My father said one word.
No, y'all call me.
Top of France.
But Brook Opal, I'm good.
What did he say?
It was really good.
He called you gay, bro.
He called you gay in French.
That's double.
Like soup coming out your mouth.
All right, if anybody's still listening, this is the Flavor 2 podcast.
Your boy Shulti.
Akash is doing Rogan right now.
So by the time this comes out, you will be watching, listening to him on Rogan.
But I call my boys and asked them to pull up.
We have Aben Preach in the motherfucking building.
We're also here with Mark.
How do you pronounce his name?
Malca Gagnoni.
We have Alex Amidia.
We have expired.
Miles Media.
We have Dove Maman.
Hello.
We have Vala Vala and Chiffetty.
Chiffetty.
Guys, we are here.
French is kind of French.
I get it, dude.
French is dope.
Okay, so you guys are from Montreal.
Obviously, that's why you speak French.
Well, maybe you might speak French also because you're Haitian.
Yeah, sure.
A little bit.
No, it's more because I'm born in Canada.
Yeah.
In Montreal.
Specifically.
Specifically.
Because I know a lot of my cousins don't speak French.
They don't.
They're Haitian.
So, yeah.
They speak Real, but they can't speak French.
We're going to get to this machete story in a little bit.
We're going to get to the machete story in a little bit.
Okay.
Preach has an amazing machete story that I've heard from multiple people about you.
Like, I'll just be talking about you guys, and then I'll be like, oh, dude, you got to have him tell you the machete story.
And I'll be like, what?
He goes, oh, yeah, there's a crazy machete story.
So we're going to get to the machete story.
Look at his smile.
The more you smile, the more fucked up I know the story is real.
I thought he was making a Haitian show.
He literally sat down.
He literally sat down.
I've never heard this question asked once.
We've had a lot of guests on this podcast.
He sat down, he looked to the back of our set.
He goes, Where are the machetes from?
Where are they from?
Did you want to name them?
What the sugar is there a good place where a machete is?
What's the best year?
It depends.
It depends of the grain of the.
No, I don't know.
I don't know.
It depends of what you use them for.
What do you use them for, Preach?
You could cut grass and sugar canes, I guess.
Okay.
And just want to say that sugar canes have the same consistency as bones.
All right, moving right along.
Have you cut someone's bones with a machete, Preach?
Okay, when there's cameras turned on, we call that evidence.
I haven't.
You sure?
I haven't.
100% yet.
This is not over, though.
You're the scariest friendly guy I've ever met in time.
Even you smiling right now.
I'm fucking terrified.
Remove the machetes.
Okay, let's start it up.
Rogan, thoughts, boys.
Oh, shit.
This is heavy.
Now, I know it looks like we just got as many black people in this room as we possibly could in order to have this discussion, but tell the people you guys were booked here a month ago to come here.
Facts.
100%.
Facts.
And also, when I watched this studio, it was just white people.
So I appreciate that we waited for Alex and Priest to show you.
You know what it is?
Yeah.
Let's go.
Let's go.
It's because white people are on time.
Yeah.
Okay.
Maybe there's something over there.
The timing of it is facts for February.
They pulled up them old clips just in time for history month.
Yeah.
Shout out to them.
You know, when some shit is calculated, when it feels calculated, it feels calculated.
I don't know.
Do you guys think that's what it is?
To me, it's pretty obvious, but I'm curious.
If you've never watched the podcast and you've never seen the clips where they were pulled from, you would 100% think he's one of the worst people.
Undoubtedly, right?
I've been watching the podcast for, what, 13, 12 years now?
So I'd even see the original Planet of the Apes clip when it first, like, when it was out, right?
Like, that's old.
You're talking about, that's when he had like the three man set up.
It looks terrible, right?
But that's when podcast wasn't taken off.
Yeah.
So do I think it's calculated?
Undoubtedly, just by the way they cut it up.
Some of the cuts were nefarious.
Like even when he's talking about like, yo, the word has a lot of meaning.
He would say the word instead of saying the n-word.
Right.
Are we going to act?
Are we going to sit here and act like somebody just discussing a difficult topic?
It's the same as going up to somebody saying, hey, you're it.
You know what I mean?
Right, right, right.
I think we all go in a history class and be like, the word, right, in a history context, well, I wouldn't look at him like, he said the word.
How dare this person?
I don't know there's a difference.
And anybody who's reasonable knows.
So when they edit that and they cut it and they do a super cut like that, I can't help but look at you funny.
Right.
Just by the way the video came out.
Right.
Right.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Like, are you saying there's a difference between calling somebody that and then saying the word in a discussion?
There's a difference between saying, yo, you're a bitch and me saying, man, listen, the way the word bitch has been used throughout history, there's a difference between those two things.
Just because you said the word.
Technically, that's what it is.
But that's where we're at now.
And I believe that there was a switch.
Like, let's, let's, can we just stop two seconds?
Let's agree that there's been a switch in the past two years or three.
There's been a switch of how we handle things, right?
With that word.
That word was everywhere.
Now we handle it and everything and stuff.
Same thing that happened with Blackface in Canada, but that's another situation.
But there's been a switch where people get really robbed up.
So that switch happened within three years, but you're going to take a clip from before that switch.
We acted like that.
It's really funny how I'm looking at the situation as like you're taking something from, let's say, 10 years ago, but you're judging it with the eyes of how we think now.
Not taking into consideration that there's been a switch in the past three or five years.
I said five years, even with trans stuff and everything.
There's been a switch.
Right, right.
From 15 or 10 years ago and judging it at the eyes of today, I feel like it's a bit disingenuous.
Let's put everything in context and we have to put everything in context with the time, the time that it's happening.
It's been watched in.
Interesting.
Al, what do you think?
I agree with that.
This version, to me, it's like when people were going back on old tweets and trying to cancel people.
So now that everybody wiped their Twitter, now they're doing it with YouTube.
Oh, shit.
Every day I go on Facebook and I remove my memes that I put before.
Because Facebook fixes throat.
Look at this terrifying face.
Holy shit, you've killed multiple people.
It's not even a question.
That's what it is.
It's like they bring back some, like, I got some, some strikes on Facebook because it's something I posted on in 2012.
And I'm like, you didn't catch it in 2012 when I posted?
The rules probably changed over time, too.
So to judge backwards is so nonsensical.
But the platform won't take that on themselves.
They don't say, they don't want it to be their liability.
So they put it on you to go review everything you've ever done with the new rules that come out.
But let's keep it a stack.
Who the fuck is reading terms of service?
Right.
Everybody just scrolls down and hits accept.
You know what I mean?
When you sign up for anything, I don't think anybody's ever read terms of service in their whole life.
Yeah, no.
So it's just like, and you know what?
I can't say, I don't know if you felt the same way.
When I saw all those black celebrities, whether it's India, R. Re, or all of them on the page, being like, yeah, go queen, fuck Rogan.
I can't believe such.
I get upset because I'm like, I hate the way sometimes black folks should be so manipulated into whatever agenda somebody else has to use like the racism term to bring down.
Like if Spotify or whoever's got problems with this misinformation want to deal with that, fine.
But don't be trying to rope in like, he's a misogynist, he's a racist, he's a trans.
They always go through the same loops to try to get you.
And then I just can't stand it with black celebrities just jump on so readily for something they don't know shit about.
I understand the knee-jerk reaction, right?
Because if it's something that you've experienced, it's painful and you're not familiar with that person and you, like you said earlier, you just see the video.
The knee-jerk reaction is like, nah, fuck this.
This is crazy if you don't know that person.
But I think that like there's two discussions happening and there's a little confusion.
One is when people like myself are out here like defending Rogan.
Now, that's my guy.
I just defend my friends.
You don't even have to ask me why.
Like, I know this person.
Like, simple as that.
If Al does some fucked up shit, Al didn't do nothing.
Yeah.
You don't care.
That's my friend.
You kill someone with a machete?
Yo, if you kill someone with a machete and you know you've also chopped down sugar cane and you're chopping through bone, you're like, oh, is this like sugar cane?
Like if you're that type of person, like it doesn't matter.
You're my guy.
Who cares?
Yes, you can trust me because I know what you do.
We have to trust you, Preacher.
We have to trust you.
And there's no policing.
If there's police, I'm like, he was the guy.
But you're not walking no sugar cane field with him while you're.
Fuck no.
Let's be honest.
Yeah, I want to show you my property in Port-au-Prince.
I can see it.
Google Maps.
You got Google Maps over there.
No.
But so that there are people responding that clearly don't know Joe that they were saying like, oh, all these people out here trying to justify him saying the N-word and him saying this horrible joke.
And it's like, Joe has said that he thinks those things are horrible himself.
So nobody's trying to defend something that Joe doesn't think is okay.
What we're trying to defend is the accusation of him being a racist.
And we know this person as a friend.
So we're like, nah, he's not.
I know this person as a friend.
And also, we're trying to talk about the convenience and timing of this racist accusation.
Because they try to hit him with the misinformation that didn't stick because he put it right back in their face.
Right.
So all of a sudden, this racing thing, like immediately right off the bat, comes out.
This has been out for 10 years.
A lot of people who are tweeting about this video seen that video, bro.
Yeah.
A lot of them see it and didn't say shit.
And they piled the fuck on right when it was convenient.
So that's what I'm talking about.
Like this is a hit piece.
And I don't know who the fuck started it.
And now that there's so much pylon, you can't really point in any one direction.
But it does come from somebody.
And I'm like, who benefits the most from this?
I don't know.
The next video is going to be the trans video.
That's going to be, and the final blow is going to be anti-Semitic.
Yeah.
That's the one.
I'll give him a pass.
You heard it here first.
Yeah, that's the one you can't scammer.
You can't touch this.
You know who's going through this right now?
Is Jimmy Carr.
You know, comedian Jimmy Carr?
Did you see the joke that he's getting?
No, no, I heard about it.
So basically, he had this joke in his special where, and I'm going to probably butcher the joke, but he essentially goes, you know, we've all heard about the absolute atrocities that happened during the Holocaust, where six million Jews were killed.
But a lot of people don't talk about the thousands of Roman gypsies that were also killed.
And that's because people don't ever highlight the good things.
Abba laughing like he had a bad interaction with a gypsy.
Yo, if you ever been to Europe and you know how they feel about gypsies, you know, every European is laughing their ass off.
Yes, their European viewers are like, yeah, we hate them niggas too.
Honestly, bro, I think a gypsy baby woke up and laughed at it.
A sleeping gypsy baby woke up, giggled, went back to bed.
But here's a perfect, like they're trying to get him out of here for that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And yeah, I guess I don't know why.
He has the benefit of having an audience.
Yes.
He said it on a comedy special where there was a group of people that all laughed.
And so when people look at it, they go, oh, yeah, there's a buffer.
He's trying to be offensive.
He's trying to tell an offensive joke.
Yes.
So there's a little bit more context.
And I think social groups.
And we've had this conversation before.
It's like, rarely do people get canceled for jokes.
Yeah.
Like when it is a true, no, no, like a true joke.
You know, like your boy Mike Ward was making a joke.
And he's, but that's.
And the little kid is back on that shit again.
Really?
So now, Supreme Court, just give context real quick.
Give context.
Mike Ward, he's a Quebec comedian, and he made a joke 13 years ago.
He wrote that joke 13 years ago, made that joke in the special about a kid.
And basically, the whole thing is about the whole joke, the premise of the joke is how there's some people that are untouchable.
That you can talk, you cannot talk about different people.
And he put that kid in there, that kid that has a disability.
All right.
And that kid tried to sue him for $40,000 or something.
First, it was $80,000.
Then it was $35,000.
And then the Supreme Court of Canada said, nah, he didn't infringe and your rights.
It's comedy.
Party PAC Takes00:09:50
Chill.
Kid is back.
Wow.
For $372,000.
Whoa.
For him and his mom.
And now they want to go on defamation.
Wow.
Because he said that.
Yeah, I try to drown the kid.
The kid won't die.
I thought that this disability was that he was.
I thought, whatever.
Basically, his disability is that he's ugly as fuck.
You just took a machete to that fucking joke, my son.
He hit it down and I sat down.
At the end of the day, at the end of the day, you know what I could do with a machete.
You remember that bit, right?
There you go, so vividly.
At the end of the day, go ahead.
At the end of the day, when you're seeing all this stuff, I don't think it's necessarily more so about the jokes because I don't think it matters whether you're joking or not.
It doesn't really matter to them.
I think it's what you represent and then how big of a figure you are, right?
Because Carr, as big as he is, he's also living in England and England.
They don't really fuck with cancel culture the same way that we do out here.
So it doesn't matter nearly as much there.
Maybe it's Chappelle for what he says is his comedy specials, whether you deem it a joke or not.
I think once you start to represent something in the zeitgeist, they start to look at you different.
And with Rogan specifically, the jump to go to Spotify, the more eyes, you know, like there's also a discussion to be had about the more mainstream you become, the more new eyes you invite to yourself.
And if they're not used to what you say, if they're starting to realize how much sway you have or how much influence you have, you bring in a whole bunch of eyes that would normally never want to watch your stuff, and they come in with that criticism.
I don't even think it's that much of a hit piece.
I think because he's gotten so much recognition, now people are like, I don't like this dude.
I'm going to start looking through his shit to see if I can find any dirt.
And then they start to watch a couple of podcasts and like, yo, he said the N-word there.
I can super cut this.
I don't even think it's as calculated as that.
I don't think it has to be.
I think just the more your name's out there, the more people are going to look you up.
And if people don't like what you're saying, they're just going to find things to go after you.
Especially if you're attached to an institution because then they could put the pressure on the institution.
Well, that's what they're doing.
100%.
That's what they do.
But it's just, it's just, I understand that you don't feel like it's calculated.
I just use a calculated thing because it's sus.
It's super.
But I'm about to say shifty.
But did you see the thread on your tweet?
No.
Come on, bro.
I was looking at my mentions, bro.
It's terrifying.
I was telling this shit.
Like, when I open Twitter and I get a lot of mentions, I'm like, oh, here it is.
Bro, there's a thread on your tweet with 18,000 likes.
Oh, really?
Explaining who did it?
Oh, who do they say?
This is like a long thread, but basically, and I don't know, again, if this is true or not, but this is what they piece together.
They basically say they look at all the people that are propagating all the initial tweets, and they say it's a Twitter page called Patriot Takes.
This is the whole Portnoy thing, right?
Okay.
So Patriot Takes puts out all these things.
If you look at Patriot Takes Bio, they're partnered with a company called Midas Touch.
Yeah.
And then Midas Touch is a professional political organization.
They're a Democrat super PAC run by three brothers.
And you can basically find the people and they're basically just getting like unlimited funding.
And I don't really understand how super PACs work, but my understanding is like it's a political tool that you can just get unlimited money to fund campaigns.
So you can't put money into politicians' pockets, but you can hire a super PAC that can get unlimited money.
So it basically acts as like a financial buffer between the rich people and the corporations and the politician that's actually making the influence.
Yeah, that's how like George Soros can just put in endless millions to support all these tiny little but it also allows it also allows the PAC to control the decisions of the candidate.
So if a candidate wants the money, they got to do what the PAC wants.
Certain promises.
And it goes both ways.
There's Republican Super PACs and Democrat super PACs.
And so people are pointing to Patriot Takes and their connection with Midas Touch as the basically it's coming from like unspecified Democrat funding is what people are suggesting.
Now, Portnoy did like a YouTube live yesterday.
And he, and I think he referenced the tweet of mine.
And then he was talking to these guys.
And then what was the outcome?
Because it felt like, at least from the reaction on the internet, that no clear like Victor, there was no clear responsible party.
I mean, the one thing that you can watch and just assume is that Midas Touch isn't responsible for cutting together the compilation video of Rogan.
Yeah.
That was also the same one that was done for Portnoy and Business Insider.
I mean, I don't know the proof, but you can kind of feel that almost Portnoy believed that.
And then it led into his belief to say, tell me that you guys are part of this group that is trying to really bring people down.
Because Portnoy thought there was connective tissue between the hit piece on him and the videos that went out on him and this piece on Rogan.
So he was trying to be like, yo, there's one party trying to take all of us down.
Let's point the finger at these guys, see if it's them.
But it looked like the guys defended themselves well.
Yeah.
And he just didn't have enough proof.
I mean, it was pretty impromptu.
Like it was from a couple tweets early in the daytime to like a midnight New York time like live session.
And he tried to pivot towards, but yeah, he did name check you that he kind of saw, oh shit, this is a strategic power play and a hit piece.
And I think it's two-pronged if it is the super PAC that's behind it because one, they get the, I guess, like clout and business like resume of saying like, yo, we took down a massive political player, like a, you know, a broadcaster.
So if you're going to try to like put money into a super PAC, this is the one you want to put it into because we have the actual influence.
Oh, yeah.
And secondly, if you look at Rogan's endorsements in the past, even if he's endorsed Democrats, it hasn't been like establishment Democrats.
So I feel like they're already Democrats that people.
In the Democrat Party probably are not as big a fans of.
So you would say the Democratic establishment has the most to gain by silencing Rogan.
He's not going to support the people that they want to put in power.
I don't know if they have the most to gain necessarily.
Like, I think news has a lot to gain, and I don't know if you can equate an urban.
Well, that's the other thing.
Which one you could say is the most.
There's a bunch of people who stand to gain from it, and they're going to pile right the fuck up on.
Of course.
And that's why it's almost like the perfect storm if you're trying to get him out of here because all you need to do is like the match.
Conservative media might have something to gain from it.
I don't think no.
Go ahead.
I was going to say, without Trump in the building, I think this becomes a great focal point.
I feel like there's always a new story on Rogan everywhere.
Oh, yeah.
They've made him the new Trump.
Right, right.
Which I think is not the most convenient because Rogan is not outlandish enough for them to fight back or to be combative.
So it doesn't create a great back and forth that stays on TV.
But as long as they can come up with these stories, they'll turn him out as long as they can.
And he is white male, straight.
Yeah.
Right.
Said some racist stuff, says edgy things, potentially anti-vax, says some controversial stuff in regards to pandemic.
Yeah.
Perfect vocal point because they got all the clips that they need.
Perfect vocal point.
It's money.
It's money.
I guarantee you the stories that they write on Rogan are probably their highest rated stories.
100%.
And I don't even think that nobody has to benefit from Rogan being here.
Because Rogan kind of encourages people to talk.
Yeah.
To have a different opinion.
People to be able to converse.
People to be in the middle.
And what political party hates?
People in the middle.
People that are nuanced.
Nuance kills the political thing.
You got to go on one side or you got to go on the other.
You got to be all the way blue or all the way red.
God forbid you think for yourself.
Right?
Like, yeah.
If he's able to just be like, no, no, maybe they got something and maybe they got something and let's meet in the middle.
Both these motherfuckers, they hate that shit.
So I think that's, that's what that's the thing.
On the other side, though, and I think it's important to bills be fair.
I've seen a lot of people criticize Rogan for the simple fact that when he has these more controversial guests, his own biases come in and he doesn't offer any pushback on the guests who may say some wacky stuff.
Because there have been some guests he's had on who said some stuff that's just absolutely nonsensical.
Yeah.
Right.
And I, and to that, I'm always like, yeah, you know what?
There is a bias there.
Even me, when I watch the podcast, I can see that.
But I don't look to Rogan to be the unbiased source.
The same way when I go on CNN, I'm not expecting them to be like, well, I can understand the anti-vaxxers.
The same way when I go on, like, right?
Everybody's got their, I think there's this idea of like the unbiased individual or the unbiased reporter or the unbiased news network.
It doesn't exist.
Dude, not that I know of.
It's a fucking Supreme Court.
They're literally hired to be unbiased.
And they vote the party line every single time.
And that's why it's such a big fucking deal when they're, when one is going to get nominated who might be like a Republican or has certain beliefs.
It's like, it shouldn't matter what their party is.
No.
You're literally just looking at the Constitution and making your decision based on the Constitution.
You're supposed to do your job.
So their political values shouldn't matter out the window.
Well, write on a paper, personal condition.
But nobody reads the fucking terms.
But yo, that's a good point.
Like, we don't, I don't want Rogan to be neutral.
Just be you, dog.
No.
Like, he never said, hey, I'm the neutral guy.
Yeah.
And I'm just giving it information.
Like, have the people on you're interested in.
Yo, if you're interested in Native Americans, have a guy on who wrote a fucking book about Native Americans.
You don't owe nobody anything.
No.
Right?
CNN, Fox News, the people that come out there and they just go, hey, we are the truth.
You owe us some truth, yo.
Yeah.
And if you don't, we could be upset.
But the guy doing a podcast that's talking to scientists and is curious about things, He owes us his curiosity.
That's exactly what a podcast is.
Yeah, you're listening to it and while you're on your laptop, like, oh, they just talked about this.
Let me Google and do more digital.
These like they forgot the whole thing, God forbid.
He forgot about it the minute that that motherfucker started to get numbers.
The minute that people started, I'm not going to look at you.
I'm going to look at them because you fucked up.
But that's not on Joe Rogan.
That's all on them on all the media that fucked up and do some fucked up shit.
Omaze Financial Freedom00:03:50
Guys, big infamous tour update, especially for Canada.
Canada, your government sucks, dude.
And they're locking you up despite the fact that COVID's over and the Vancouver shows are going to have to be moved.
Okay.
So we will honor all tickets, but they are going to be moved to May 6th.
Okay.
Winnipeg, Calgary.
We're also going to find other dates for those shows as well.
And Toronto is the one that's up in the air.
I'm hoping your country will open up so we don't have to reschedule those Toronto shows.
Truckers, keep on doing what you're doing.
Keep on convoying.
Okay.
Convoy your country into opening up so we don't have to move those Toronto shows.
But we are going to move Winnipeg and Vancouver and Calgary.
I'm sorry.
It sucks.
I don't want them to be moved, but it is what it is.
And infamous tour, you know, we got other shows coming up.
We're going to be in Alabama, New Orleans, Cleveland, Pittsburgh.
You know what I'm saying?
Montreal, New York, motherfucking city, Radio City.
Fuck it.
We added another show.
Okay.
Go get them tickets at Radio City and then Atlantic City, New Jersey.
Go get them shits.
We appreciate the support.
Thank you so much.
These shows have been absolutely amazing.
It's crazy to see the tour evolve and change.
And I'm just, it's just awesome.
It's awesome.
Thank you guys so much for supporting this.
And we're going to have a real cool, fun special coming up.
I'm very excited to make some announcements about that.
That's going to be fucking wild.
So that's all I got to say.
Make sure you check out Akasha's dates, Akash Singh.
Akash Singh Comedy is the YouTube page, but I believe Akash Singh.com is his website.
Make sure you check his website for all his dates and congratulate him on his first appearance on Rogan.
Man, that's a huge accomplishment for a comedian and just anybody.
So make sure you go congratulate him on all the things he's doing and check out Bring Back a Pooh.
Half a million of y'all have already checked it out, which is fucking unbelievable.
So go support my brother Akash Singh, like you guys have been.
He's the man.
He deserves it.
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Guys, let's get back to the show.
Do you think there's a bit of programming?
Like in the sense that whether it's this or whether it's the fact that people watch a two-minute clip and they come to a knee-jerk reaction, is there not a bit of programming mentally where our minds are just not capable of we have to simplify things.
Internalizing Podcast Facts00:07:58
I can't get to know everybody.
Like, I'm not going to watch a 10-minute video on Al or a one-hour video on Al to know if I see a two-minute clip, like you're a piece of shit to me because I don't have time to do the extra research.
I don't think our brains can look at every incident and wait to make a judgment, right?
We had a discussion about this.
Yeah, yeah.
So, like, I'm reading this book right now, Roger Ailes, like the dude that basically like ran Fox from like behind the scenes.
And he's like, evil capitalist guy, but like, also kind of a genius at the same time, like a tricky, tricky character.
Yeah, basically, he was so, he was the first guy that like made politics entertainment on TV and was like, yo, make the TV think for people.
And he has a quote in the book where he's like, bro, thinking is hard.
Yeah.
It is hard to think.
Let the TV think for people.
And people want to just digest information.
It's already worked out.
I mean, that's my frustration right now with news is like, I don't trust any of it.
So I find myself checking out of information.
Yes.
Right.
Like, I actually will go to like my friends for takes.
I go to my friend going, what is your take on this?
Even if it's not based in fact or anything, I'm just like, well, what do you feel?
Because your feeling is probably just as accurate as the bullshit I'm going to get on MSNBC or Fox News.
Right.
So if people want to remove themselves from that thinking process and they find a place where they believe the truth is, they'll start to just convince themselves that that's the truth.
Right.
It is what it is.
So I understand like people feeling maybe misled in that regard, but like that's the human, that's the human reaction.
That's the human instinct.
Let's do as little work as possible to get the most information that we can.
Yes.
Right?
It's like that's why books exist, right?
Oh, this guy's an expert on that.
He figured it all out.
Okay, I'm going to digest this book.
So I don't want to go to college for three years and then university for five and then have a dark tweet.
You want some real shit?
I don't give a fuck about it.
I'm trying to figure out a story.
I go on YouTube.
I go, let me see if I've been preach already figured out this goddamn story.
You know how many people watch your shit?
Because they're like, I don't want to research this shit.
I've been preach researching.
Yeah, they did the work.
You guys did the work.
You know what we did?
Google.
But that's it.
Do we have a research?
Are you going to make some of those niggas to Google for me?
Fuck that.
But you read something.
You read two things.
Yeah, I read a couple of things.
Bro, research.
When we were doing the rants, bro, the research was the hardest part.
Writing the jokes is fun.
Getting in a room, talking that shit, et cetera.
But writing the fucking research paper, going in there, reading the fucking articles, talking to the experts.
Yeah, but the news don't want to do that no more.
They want, shit, I want Ric Flair.
Yeah, everybody loves Ricky.
Tucker, that's perfect.
Tucker's entertaining.
He got to drop a hoof.
That's what it is.
They want that.
And the news cannot do that anymore.
And if they see Rogan with his numbers, and then he gets all the publicity that we can't get, all that money.
We want that money.
You can't get that.
Yo, Tucker.
They kind of cry about that shit.
Tucker, low-key.
Tucker's mind.
He's the most senator.
He just got to be like, he really got to be like, so what do the Democrats think?
It doesn't matter what the Democrats think.
He got to go full wrestling, bro.
Yeah.
If he went full wrestling, I think he gets everybody on.
Him versus Don Lemon?
Bro.
Don't go dust.
Bro.
Not that.
Don Lemon don't want that smoke, bro.
Don Donald can't handle it.
No.
Tucker out here calling Nancy Pelosi Michael Jackson.
Imagine what he's going to do with Don Lemon.
Yeah, I think the only one who could go head to head with him would be Jon Stewart.
I'd watch that.
Yeah, but Stewart's an actual comedian.
Like, Stewart will mop the floor with Tucker.
What about actual combat?
Oh, actual fight?
Yeah.
Who's going to win in a fight?
Yeah.
Oh, Anderson Cooper.
Did he, the pain tolerance, bro?
Just think of that.
The pain tolerance is different.
He's assuming he's a bottom.
I say what?
That's mad.
I don't know how many books he had to read to know that shit.
Assuming.
I know for a fact.
God damn.
Man, New York, bro.
I need a pun, bro.
Fast forward.
Okay.
Actually, wait, no.
We're talking about the Rogan thing.
Yes.
The other thing I was going to say is like, when people watch a podcast, and this is the mistake of the people, and I feel like people do this with comedy too, is they'll listen to Rogan and they'll internalize things as facts.
I'm just listening to somebody have a conversation.
Whether they're right or wrong, like I'm not assuming that.
The same way people go to Dave Chappelle's comedy special, they're like, that's facts.
No, it's not.
It's a joke.
Because comedians oftentimes will obfuscate the truth.
They'll stretch facts.
They'll misplace timings all the time when they're telling a story of a real event.
And that's okay because you're doing it for the punchline.
But the viewer, the issue with them is like they're like, man, when he got that, the baby situation, like he was wrong.
Like the baby shot self-defense.
Like, nigga, this is not a self-defense team.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're watching a comedy special.
But I think there's also a responsibility on the viewers to not be so lazy and to not just hear something and be like, that's the truth.
You got to remind them it's comedy.
It's like, you know, when you're on stage, someone's like, excuse me, actually, shut up.
Yeah.
Shut your whore mouth.
Yeah.
Comedy, shut up.
You know, we're not here for that.
Actually, you can actually shut the fuck up.
Like, there are always people like that.
Low-key, I can see that happen with you guys a lot because you'll be on your YouTube channel and you'll say what is happening in a story.
So people might perceive you guys as the news, not only comedians, because you guys are stand-up comics, but probably the most interaction people have with you guys is delivering them the news.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's interesting.
Which is sad.
On a daily basis.
Which is sad.
Which is so sad.
Because early in my career, and Alex can probably talk about this too, is like, when I was doing Brilliant Idiots, a lot of people didn't know me as a comic.
So they would hear me saying these wild things on Brilliant Idiots and be like, this kid is going crazy.
What the fuck is this guy talking about?
Yo, but here's the thing.
Once I put out the sheet episode, I said, this nigga's wild.
I'm a wild boy.
He was moving money.
I'm a wild boy.
You never seen this man in his early days?
Man.
Yeah, I was out here.
But I put out some stand-up, literally put out stand-up.
And then all the people that watch the podcast saw the stand-up and they're like, oh, here are the fleshed out versions of those crazy takes.
And he's just being a comic on a podcast.
And it immediately changed the perception.
Everybody that was like upset or frustrated or didn't understand me before, after that moment, immediately started going, oh, he's just doing that comedian thing.
And it was liberating, bro.
Because I got to go be myself on the podcast instead of being like someone who is a social commentator.
I'm a comedian, bro.
Yeah, I feel you on that.
And that's why it'd be interesting to see you guys put out more stand-up because people could look at you guys for the truth and they'll look at you guys for the information.
But then when you guys are busting balls or you have that kind of hot take that's a little spicy, they go, yeah, that's what they do.
These guys are comics.
But I would want to have more comedy on my channel, but shit's a little dead, right?
It's a little dead right now.
What do you mean, can't it?
No, it can much dead.
There's a reason why we got that freedom convoy.
Yeah.
So are y'all supporting the racist, homophobic, misogynistic fans?
Yeah, yeah, I want to support the people that want to kill me for sure.
I'm just waiting for a truck to come by.
So I'd be like, hey, take me home, daddy.
I got a character decision.
If I get to do another comedy show, run me over, brother.
I'm going to see this shit.
I'm going to go.
Facts coming.
I sat by the road.
Some bitch trying to give me cookies.
I'm like, I thought, I thought the KKK was about to roll through.
She had cookies.
They were baking stuff.
Blanket.
Little gingerbread man.
Come on, you want some poutine?
They got that shit by the side of the road.
It's crazy.
Oh, it's happened in Montreal too.
Yes.
Got you.
They've been converging to the capital, right?
It's happening in my hometown of Ottawa.
Shitty place, but it's a capital.
I didn't know you're from Ottawa.
I was born there, but I grew up elsewhere.
Okay.
Yeah.
Gotcha.
Karen Energy Mandates00:15:21
All right.
So break it down for like us Americans and like there's other foreigners that are watching this podcast because we're just getting the American version of it.
Right.
And obviously that's very skewed, right?
Because the left is going to be like, oh, yeah, these racist people have organized this protest.
They're terrorizing the city.
They're occupying it.
And then the right is basically going, no, these are peaceful people and the community's coming together.
And look, they cleaned down the statue of the one-legged guy that used to run in Canada, right?
Like whatever the guy's name is.
I don't know.
Terry Fox.
Yeah, Terry Fox.
What is it?
Pirate Fox.
Pirate Fox.
Terry Fox.
This guy's wild.
So what is it?
What's going on?
And where do Canadians stand on it?
When it started out, it started out as just to enter back in Canada, truckers would have to do 14 days of quarantining if they don't get vaccinated.
After they've left, they went to the U.S. and they want to come back in Canada.
They would say, yo, you're going to have to do 14 days of quarantine.
Unless you get vaccinated.
And you got to get vaccinated.
Thing is, 90% of the truckers are vaccinated.
They already are.
Yeah.
It's just that they said, even for that time, they went, they just tilted.
They went like, you know what?
Fuck this shit.
Who gives a fuck?
It's not so much that all the truckers are not.
They are.
Most of them are vaccinated.
It's principle.
It's just like, when you know what?
Fuck it.
Yeah.
Fuck it.
And then they marched down and it started with that.
And then they just added a whole bunch of things.
Okay, now we have the mandates.
So remove all the mandates.
We know it doesn't work like that.
It doesn't work.
Remove all those mandates and stuff like that.
So now it's bigger.
It's bigger than anti-vax people.
And you feel like Canada is supporting this?
You feel like most Canadians are rocking with them?
Interesting.
I don't think most.
I think people see the support online and assume that, but actually, most Canadians.
So Canada is very different from the states.
Most Canadians support the mandates, the vaccine mandates, all that stuff.
Lockdowns?
By polls, by all the numbers.
Even though the support has dwindled over time, it's still a majority.
So they're supportive of the lockdowns and all the measures.
I know because I live in Quebec.
And even though a lot of the young people in Montreal are not down with it, the rest of the province doesn't give a fuck.
Really?
They're fine with a lot of this.
If you're not, basically, if you're not.
Even the restaurants, even though obviously the business owners are really hurt by it, so they can't stand it.
But if you're talking about the people who matter, who are the voters to the politicians, right?
Then the voters, they're with it.
And the voters, the voters are boomers.
So that's interesting.
The voters don't care about the restaurateur.
They don't give a fuck.
I don't care about it, but they don't care about clubs, comedy clubs.
They don't care about restaurants.
They don't care about that.
They're not the service industry.
They don't do that.
I actually saw, this was, I was in an Uber, and there's a guy who had the radio on, and he was talking to this old guy who was out of the bid in the boonies.
And he was like, how do you feel about the fact that a lot of young people, they're depressed, some of them are feeling suicidal.
They feel like they're socialized.
They can't see their friends from high school or they can't hang out with anybody.
They're really being hurt by all the restrictions.
Don't you have any sympathy for them?
He's like, oh, fuck them.
Fuck the clubs.
Fuck everybody.
Tell them to stay home.
It's none of my business.
There's zero consideration for the younger generation.
And so that sentiment is very pervasive.
They don't care.
And everyone's kind of out there for their own self-interest in that regards.
We're getting none of that here.
The only version of that, and maybe you guys are seeing different shit than me, but the only version of that I get is from Trudeau and from the politicians.
Yeah.
Where they're hiding right now.
Yo, that was pussy shit, right?
That's him.
Why y'all vote for this guy, man?
You're like hard.
Canadians.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, don't put everybody in the same pot.
You know what it is?
It's not that enough of y'all.
He didn't win.
He didn't win.
The field lost.
That's pussy, even right there.
How you got a loser as president?
Like, they're good with the status quo.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're good with this.
And he also timed his election really intelligently.
That's the most Canadian shit ever.
You don't even have to win.
Win it, bro.
That's a minute.
Wait a minute.
You elect the loser.
You elected the loser, bro.
Don't you know that guy got a minority government?
Don't you do that too?
All right, fine.
Technically, Trump did win because they stole time.
Okay, hold on.
Recount at it.
That's pussy.
Well, listen, we tried to make a change.
Some of us went down there.
Yeah.
We had our own little freedom convoy.
Wasn't successful.
They just ran up on foot.
Let us in, please.
That was mad.
But yeah, no, um, Canadians overwhelmingly support the mandates, but you're seeing a lot of people online who are behind it, people from other countries.
So online, if you're consuming it that way, you get the vibe.
Yeah.
You know what was interesting?
You know what was crazy?
What?
You know that their GoFundMe was canceled.
But you know who did it?
They actually admitted it.
Who?
It was the mayor of Ottawa.
Him and the government were the government.
And they said, we want this shut down.
And GoFundMe accepted.
He came on interview and said, yeah.
What?
Yeah.
So the government got with a private institution who's going.
And now GoFundMe is not even returning the money.
They're going to give it to other random chairs.
No, that's not true.
You can get your money back.
You can?
They don't want to give the money back.
Okay.
Because they get 3%.
Right.
Right.
So they don't want to give back that 3%, obviously.
But if you ask for your money, you can't get it back.
If you don't ask for it, they're going to just disagree.
Naturally, that's what they do.
That's crazy to me.
But here's the thing: that's what they do in these situations.
I was looking that up.
Like, if you give money to a charity, then they can't, you know, they can't give it to someone.
They don't automatically give it back to you because they wanted that little piece.
But it's not fucked up that the government can step in.
They manipulate a private business.
I wouldn't say myself.
Last time I checked, it was like 45% agree with the convoy.
So it's not overwhelming, but it's still the majority still agrees against it.
You know what I mean?
So, but I don't know.
We'll see.
We'll see what's going on.
Yeah.
With the whole cancellation of the GoFundMe with them moving to another city.
Like they were really in Ottawa.
Now they're really in Quebec City.
No.
Is it true that they're calling it an occupation now?
And that's why the GoFundMe was going to take it because a GoFundMe can support a protest.
It's all smear, right?
It's all smear.
It's all smart.
So how do you guys feel?
It's like, like, Canada is supposed to be this like progressive, loving, like, everybody gets along country.
And it has these a lot of amazing things.
Like, I think one of the things I admire about Canada is it seems to, and again, this is from the outside.
It seems like Canada does a good job of getting most people on board with the Canadian sentiment, right?
It seems like there is a love of being Canadian, and then that can cross cultural barriers too.
Like there is this idea of like, hey, we got to look out for one another, and that's the right thing to do.
And we can be proud of that.
It's just that our PR is better than yours.
That's true.
Let's not act like, you know, you don't think that it's, you don't think that it's your political opposition isn't as extreme?
Like, even your right wing doesn't even touch our left.
Yet.
Yet.
I could get there.
I do think that there's far more trust in our institutions than you guys have in yours.
Okay, that's because our institutions don't have the same rep that your guy yours do.
Ah, they haven't broken your trust just yet.
No, and if you think about quality of life, I'm pretty sure if you look at the happiness index, we're going to rank higher than you guys.
Okay.
Why?
Because a lot of our basic needs are taken care of for the most part.
We have good social safety nets.
We got health care for people.
You know what I mean?
We don't have the same issues in terms of like, if you're poor, there's a lot more opportunity for you in Canada than there would be here in the States, right?
I think in terms of the general sentiment towards the government, we're far ahead of you guys in that regards.
And so when the government says we're going to do a lockdown, well, they've earned a lot more trust from us than you.
They're like, you must be right.
Where we've had the government fuck us over for like, I don't trust these motherfuckers.
Who's really behind this?
Exactly.
Does Big Pharma want to lock it down?
Like, who's really profiting off of this?
So you guys believe, but now you have these instances where you see the government using their power to kind of silence individual citizens.
Do you start to lose a little bit of faith for your government?
It's called a brittle a bit, but it's not, it's not the same.
It's going to take a lot more.
And that's why I said, yet, we're not there yet.
But I mean, if they keep on going like that, it's going to happen.
It's just that their PR is better than yours.
Yeah.
America has been known to say fuck you a lot more than fuck that shit.
Fuck you.
Nah, fuck them.
We just you guys.
But that's culturally, that's who we are.
Like, and the people, I understand that.
But the people who come here, they're the fuck you people.
Yeah.
Like everybody who comes to America, one person in their family looked at the country they were from.
All their family members were like, I don't need y'all.
I don't know if you can attest to this.
I feel like immigrants, even in Canada, like people from minority backgrounds, already have, before this pandemic, not fucked with the government.
Oh, because they're coming from places where the government's corrupt.
Yeah, and also like the government of Canada doesn't have the greatest reputation, you know, reputation with the indigenous people, for example.
What?
No, no.
Wait, what happened?
What happened?
Did something happen with Native American?
He's an expert on that.
He got a machete from them, so he knows all about it.
Let's call it Tomahawk.
That's real.
But yeah, they think, let's not act like they didn't find the bodies of 6,000 kids.
Whoa.
In residential holes.
Don't, don't, don't.
Let's not act.
Jimmy Carr.
In search of this.
Let's not act like we all breezy with the native.
Let's not act like natives don't have clean drinking water in the reservation.
Let's come on now.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, we're all good.
Yeah.
So I think it's harder for us to gauge that level of trust because I've always kind of had that to some degree.
So I don't know how the more white populace would feel about how things are shifting.
I don't know.
I'm kind of isolated from that.
You kind of see some fucked up shit sometimes.
It's just like, you hang around the natives and you're like, okay, yeah, you've been fucked up.
Just like what they did in.
Okay, cool.
Same thing.
How do the natives feel about the convoy?
Oh, some of them are with them.
That's interesting.
Yeah, because some of the people from the convoy are actually requested.
Some of them requested, yo, can we do something about the water?
Yeah.
Can we do something about the water?
It's been time.
And Trudeau said that he would do something about the water six years ago.
And he received, I believe, was $1.8 billion in funding.
Wow.
What do you think he did with that?
Bought paint?
Oh, black paint, maybe?
We got to do it.
Don't fund me.
That's what it is.
Redirect the money.
How do you feel about that?
How do you feel about like the Trudeau blackface stuff?
Yeah, I don't care.
I keep the same energy.
He did something 25 years ago.
20 years ago.
It's like 20 years.
I just don't get on.
Technically, it was brownface, right?
Isn't that allowed?
Yeah.
Yeah, I feel like that's different.
No, it is different.
I feel like it is different.
Isn't it?
Not especially yellowface.
Isn't that different?
No, I don't think it's different.
I think it's different because there's no cultural example of like with blackface.
There's examples of black people not being allowed to succeed in certain institutions.
And it's a mockery of black people in film, right?
If we've seen that with brownface, then I would go, okay, maybe we can't do that.
If there's no history of that, then you should be able to do brownface.
Yeah.
So it's not like it's offensive to put the color on your face.
It's offensive to remind us of this time period where black people were mocked and cinnamon.
I would just ask brown people.
I just asked brown people, how y'all feel about it?
You know what a cool story did come out, though?
What?
They were trying to get tow trucks to tow away the freedom confoy.
And they were like, nah, we're not doing that.
Yeah, we're not.
You're like, no, we're not helping you guys.
You got to find someone else.
Fuck that shit.
Because they work so close to that concert.
Let's see.
That's saying that's the homies right there, bro.
Yeah, we're not doing that.
That's like you defending Rogan.
Like, you're not going to do nothing.
That's my God.
That's where the truckers get their trainings.
So they're like, I'm going to tow these motherfuckers.
I ain't fucking up my job.
Hell no.
My picture.
I thought I'm on the news and now they know.
Weren't you that guy on the new that threw the truck?
Oh, shit.
I ain't doing that.
I just love seeing Canadians angry.
That shit is the best.
It's still a shit.
We're not going to fucking stand for it anymore.
I'm not going to fucking like I. You know that came straight out of the middle.
When black people do like the white guy voice in comedy, that's how I feel doing Canadians' voice.
Okay.
When I hear Canadians, I think that's what black people hear when they hear white people.
Maybe you feel employable.
Yeah.
What?
Are you saying I'm not employable?
That's managers.
I got upset for a second.
You ain't Karen.
You ain't Karen.
You know, Karen.
You made a shit.
Hey, son.
I understand Karen energy, by the way.
I figured out Karen energy.
It's this is, and white people, we have this in us.
It's just when you're not used to being inconvenienced, it feels like an attack.
And poor white people don't have Karen energy because they're used to being inconvenienced.
It's rich white people that like usually the people that are around them are like, I don't know.
They're like there, like the people in the building are there to serve them, right?
The people at their fucking resort are there.
Everybody's there to serve them.
So when somebody like interrupts or does something that they don't like, they're like, why would you be doing this to me?
Black people are used to getting pulled over for no fucking reason, right?
Followed around a store for no fucking reason.
So when you're inconvenienced, the knee jerk isn't go to Karen.
So I literally think it's just simply a misunderstanding of inconvenience.
It's like white people, sometimes you're going to get inconvenienced.
How did you discuss this?
And this is what it is.
Say again.
How did you discover this, Andrew?
I put this together because I live in a building with rich people.
And the way.
Don't say you live in a building with rich people, bro.
You live in the building also.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
But so, no, but here's the thing.
Like, when you grow up in New York City, like, you get inconvenience.
You get robbed.
Right.
It's like motherfuckers like, I'm stuck in traffic, bitch, you're traffic.
You're tracking.
You're tracking too.
How could this traffic do this to me?
How could these people want to get home to their families?
Selfish pieces of shit.
I have to go to the casino.
No!
No, no, Loki.
Like, so, like, I'm used to, I've been inconvenienced.
Like, I've been robbed.
Like, I've been like, shit has fucked up.
Shit has happened to me.
Because they didn't give a fuck if I was white or not.
It was like, yo, you could be a mark.
Get it, right?
If you never experienced that with a lot of these people, too, like these people in my building, anything goes wrong with the building, they lose their fucking shit.
They're screaming on people, yelling.
And don't get me wrong, we pay a lot to live there, et cetera.
But there's part of me that goes, like, yo, that's just a building.
Like, sometimes the elevator don't work.
Like, the elevator didn't work to you.
They want the elevator to work.
Right?
So I'm not angry, but the vitriol that's coming out of these people in their fucking emails.
And I'm like, I'm trying to wrap my head up.
What the fuck is this shit?
Yeah, but I don't want to take the stairs.
And now I'm going to take the stairs.
I'm going to miss the beginning of a sex in the city.
It's streaming, bitch.
You get to it.
Clap Cleats Confusion00:04:19
Anyway, that's, I think they can.
It makes sense.
Okay.
Makes sense.
Okay.
Listen, I want us to talk about something that's very important, which is the Canadian sensitivity.
Yes.
Because while we have Canadians right here, now it has been brought to my attention that your king, Drake, has unfollowed ASAP Rocky after the pregnancy announcement.
Is that simping or pimping?
I'm sorry.
You know what it is?
Speak to it, King.
You know how it works in this world, right?
It's pimp or be pimp, right?
This past fucking week, I've seen so many people that call themselves pimps and are like, fuck simping.
And then Rihanna came out with that, with that picture.
And then why are you going to post yourself crying?
A girl you don't know.
You don't understand.
It's real.
I don't give a shit.
Were people crying over it?
No, I mean, they make skiffs and shit like the boy would do that or repose the picture.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because let me tell you something.
This Valentine's, you're going to be hitting it from all angles.
And one angle that you need to make sure that you deliver on is when you're on your feet, but you're clapping from the back or on your feet and you're hitting it.
She's laying on the bed and you're kind of doing stand-up mish.
If you're doing stand-up mish, you're hitting that 90 degrees, okay?
Or you're hitting from the back, but you're standing up.
Here's the thing.
You're sliding all over the place.
You can't really dig in.
You can't really reach the back.
You know what I'm saying?
You can't hit that ball.
You can't hit that ball in the back.
Why?
Because you're slipping and sliding all over the place, Mark.
That's why.
You're slipping and sliding, but you don't need to slip and slide when you got the clap cleats.
You can get to clapping and them cleats are going to stick onto that ground so you could just pap, pap, pap.
You're going to hear a harder slap sound than you've ever heard in your life.
Your balls just smacking against box lips.
Jesus.
Okay.
Yes, you can say it.
Okay.
That's a technical term.
Balls, box slips.
Balls, box slips.
Real talk.
And that's going to happen with the clap cleats.
Okay.
I'm telling you, they got the five-toe grip design and custom fit socks.
Stay put so you can hit it deep and out of the park.
Be a freak.
Bless every single room in the house with your clap cleats.
Okay.
You know for damn sure you're going to secure your footing and traction.
Okay.
Point is.
Go to clapcleats.com.
Use the promo code Flager for 20% off.
Okay.
And hit some different positions.
Hit a different angle.
With clap cleats, you can literally hit that Michael Jackson angle where you're going to be rubbing up on the inside of the vaginal wall and she's going to be having multiple orgasms because you can go, you can lean in on the clap cleats, bro.
The clap cleats got you.
They got it.
They got it.
They fucking got you.
Clapcleats.com.
Use the promo code Flagrant to fuck your girl good.
Shit.
And get 20% off while you fuck your girl good.
Like, don't you want to do that on Valentine's Day?
Yep.
You know, be balls deep.
You know what I mean?
She's trying to throw it back at you.
You're not moving nowhere.
No, get it shit.
She's not moving.
She's trying to throw it back and then she's looking back and like, what?
And she don't know you got the clap cleats on.
She just thinks it's regular socks.
She's like, I can't move this motherfucker.
No, you can't.
You can't move me.
Because once I got my foundation in, I'm a statue.
Locked in.
I'm locked in.
I'm loaded.
And I got 20% off.
Lock it, loaded, 20% off.
Try to back it up.
Challenge your woman.
Okay, don't do that.
Yo, challenge your motherfucking woman.
Can you back me up when I got the clappers on?
I think you're allowed to say this.
Can you back me up when I got the clappers on?
No, you can't.
Nothing you could do.
Nothing.
All right.
I think that's good.
Clapcleats.com.
Use the promo code Flagrant 20% off and let me know how it goes.
Let me see the, I want to see the confusion on your girl's face.
I want to see the confusion on the girl's face.
Well, you're, I mean, it's going crazy.
She's like, is that ball sack slapping against my box lips?
Ball sack, box lips.
Ball sack, box slips.
Ball sack, box lips.
Okay?
Real talk.
I want to know the confusion that she's feeling.
Okay.
Let me know.
Let's get back to the show.
Ball Sack Box Lips00:13:25
Well, would you unfollow?
I wouldn't care.
You wouldn't care.
No, I wouldn't care like that.
First off.
Oh, shit.
Canada don't.
First off.
No, I'm trying to click you, Clay.
Let's go, bro.
Let's go, bro.
He's not Canadian, bro.
This motherfucker's for the West Coast for sure.
I was from Compton, bro.
I don't talk about it.
I fucked your wet.
We busted some bad boys, nigga.
Fuck you.
She got it fucked up.
Abba's out here.
All the white girls that were singing along just now that watched it on Euphoria the other day.
Oh, my God.
Okay, go.
Canada don't claim Drake like that.
Yeah, drop the ether.
Canada does not claim Drake like that.
Whoa, you're about to get bottomed.
Toronto.
Toronto.
Toronto playing.
Toronto.
But the truth is, anybody who's not from Canada thinks Toronto, and then there's nothing else that exists.
You feel me?
So they think it's like, it's not a thing like that.
Like, we don't really fuck with him like that.
That's not.
Damn.
So that's one.
Yeah, I got the Toronto thing.
But people are very proud of Drake in Toronto.
Yeah, keep spitting, Abba.
Yeah, man.
Are we doing Nas now?
Yeah, we thought you were going for it, bro.
No, no, no.
Bank don't care about Drake.
Scotland don't give a shit about Break.
Scotchman doesn't care about Drake.
Yo, who are you?
Good afternoon.
Yo, yo, I swear to God.
What are you talking about?
Why are you talking about it?
Buddy, buddy, buddy.
Why are you talking about something like that?
Buddy, this is OVO Fest.
I've been waiting for my tickets for OVO Fest for years.
Hey, I got an owl tattooed on my abdomen.
You better watch your mouth over there, buddy.
That's corner gas.
You've been watching too much corner gas.
What's corner gas?
Never mind.
I'm tripping because when I was in the military, I got to spend time with everybody all across Canada.
Which one?
So it was my first Canadian.
I'm not taking no jokes.
No slang.
I thought it was you.
Do you guys have a military?
You guys just go around passing Putin?
I thought he was rocking with Joseph Coney, bro.
I didn't know.
I donated, fam.
That was the first trucker convoy.
Cody 2022, right?
So, yo, Cody's coming back.
But yo, he's fighting, though.
They still haven't caught him.
All that money donated.
But anyways, that's a separate topic.
I coughed up some bread, bro.
Did you?
How much?
I got my little care package.
That ass.
I'm donating.
What happened to the organizer?
I didn't donate to Joseph Coney.
I donated to stopping Joseph Coney, bro.
You know what happened to the organizer of Coney Peter?
Yeah, that motherfucker was beaten off in public.
They made him go crazy.
The MK ultra him, bro.
Damn.
Don't tell the government what to do.
Don't tell America who to bomb.
How dare you tell America who to bomb?
You're going to be jerking off in a park in San Diego.
Man, we were so fucking stupid back then believing that bullshit.
How dumb do you have to be?
Like, yeah, the American government needs more money for radars.
Wait, is that what happened?
Yeah, they were saying we wanted to fund the American government to send the military to get that.
Yeah.
That's what they were getting the money for to go find those girls that he couldn't.
That was one of the campaigns that was like that.
Really?
That's what I donated?
That's what I donated to?
I thought we were just trying to stop Joseph Coney, bro.
Nah, nah, you donated to Joe Soros instead.
Fucking George Soros, dude.
Everything goes back to him at the end of the day, right?
You think?
Yo, why are you pointing at the gym?
You think he got him with speed dial or something like that?
The fuck come on, bro.
Not my Jew.
Exactly.
They still upset about that.
Source don't know what side he's on, right?
Not on our side, bro.
Your accent's fire, though.
I'm not even gonna fight.
That Canadian accent you do is mad.
Not the past.
Hey, buddy.
Hey, buddy.
I don't want all these compliments, buddy.
Come on.
Come on.
Let's not being so sweet all the time.
Come on.
Let's hit the pawn with the boys, huh?
Shoot some shots or something.
Come on.
Canadian military is going to have the funniest sound in general, bro.
Yeah, how do they tell you what to do?
What do you mean?
If you guys would like to line up, it's your choice.
Of course, I don't want to force you to do anything that you don't want to do, but if you wouldn't mind, maybe dropping down and giving me 20 push-ups, maybe 15, maybe 15 push-ups if you get a little bit tired.
Maybe you can do 15 push-ups.
That's a good one.
Do them on your knees.
That's fine.
We don't judge.
Who are y'all going to fight, bro?
Who's going to invade y'all?
I was going to say, Freelands?
Who the fuck is coming in?
In front of the enemy?
Why?
Yeah, yeah.
How are you doing?
Just training to fight truckers.
That's the whole shit.
Nah, but their Air Force was fucking up Nazis before the boys.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
That's what's said, Canada.
I mean, jokes aside, yeah.
No, we bought it.
You bought it?
You bought it about it.
But so what happened?
Like, what did you guys do?
What did you guys study?
Those guys served, bro.
Have some respect.
I want to know what they're doing.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
How about you?
I crit so much.
We're like, hey, man, you're a veteran.
I find that so crazy.
Thank you for your service.
If you didn't get it, you did it.
Stop it.
Stop it.
You protected our land.
Listen here, bucko.
You went through the process.
You went through that process.
People are going to call you.
People try to give you like free shit.
Yeah, I want to give you some free stuff.
Here you go.
Yeah.
I mean, I'll take somebody.
Yo, do you board the airplane first?
Well, that when they when they call up military personnel, do you board first?
Nah, nah.
No.
Wait, does that cancel out your Muslimness?
Like when you're getting on a plane, they're like, all right, he's Muslim.
We might have to choose.
Oh, he's in the army.
I think it's even.
That doesn't mean cancel your Muslim, but you know what does what?
Not dating black girls.
Is that true?
Is that true?
I don't know anything about that.
I was not talking about it to him.
I was talking about this.
Me getting spicier by the second.
Hey, hey, you're not getting anything past his goalie over here, buddy.
Yo, we should give him all the time.
Come on, guys.
Come on, guys.
I swear.
I'm getting you a passport.
As soon as they find Justin Trudeau, I'm Canadian, dude.
I'm Canadian, bud.
But that's what they like to say.
But I'm Canadian, bud.
I tell you one thing, man.
I had enough of these girls and their fake eyelashes.
Everybody thinks they're going to Drake's house, huh?
Oh, you think you're going to get invited to Drake's house just because you got some fake eyelashes, do you?
Yo, you need to clip that, put that shit online.
Canadians about to lose their fucking mind, bro.
Absolutely.
That's mad.
I love my Canadians, bro.
Shout out to y'all.
But no, for real, in the military, so you learn how to make snowballs good or what?
What is it?
He's going to head right now, bro.
He's going to be.
Do you match a bunch of the older?
You let him talk about it like that.
Yeah, a lot of you people are going to be mad at you.
Yo, all your generals, like, yo, we do.
How dare you?
How dare you?
How dare you let them talk all this shit?
You just talk about our snowball abilities, bro.
Nah, fuck with Canada, man.
Canada's dope.
What are y'all called?
What do they call you?
Like, what are the different divisions?
Like, we got Army, Navy.
Every country was a single shit.
Oh, really?
Navy, Air Force as well.
Army.
We just don't have the Marines.
That's the one thing we do.
Which one were you in?
Army.
You're in Army?
What?
What?
Hey, when we send the boys over there, it's a problem.
Oh, we send the boys over there.
Oh, you better watch out, Isis.
We're coming.
We're gonna cool things off down there.
I'll tell you that.
It was a desert turtle boys came over.
But jokes aside, man, yeah, look, the Canadian military is actually really well respected in terms of like its efficiency and like how well trained we are.
Just like per troop, we're trained a lot better than you guys are.
Really?
Yeah, 100%.
We do, we do beat you whenever they have exercises.
Yeah, we fuck y'all up.
Oh, we're yeah, because you're not you for this shit right here.
Yeah, what exercise y'all beat us in?
Everything, yeah, everything.
Yeah, we got everything.
How much oil you got from other countries, huh?
You know what I'm saying?
How much you guys paid for a liter?
I mean, I don't know about oil, but poppy seeds.
Oh, you guys.
I got you.
You thought it was snow?
No, nigga.
We're not throwing snowballs.
Never seen a poppy ball.
Let's go.
Nah, I love it.
I love knowing the fucked up shit about other countries, especially the ones that have like great reputations.
Yes.
Like, Canada has like a stellar reputation.
So when I find out, like, a little dirt, I'm like, ooh.
You know what we need to give a shout out to?
Who?
England.
For making y'all technically, they made y'all too.
No, no, yeah, yeah.
They would have dropped off the horse and be like, yo, procreate.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
Nah, nah, nah, nah.
We made us.
We fought back.
You fought.
You made us.
You guys are still part of it.
Nah, you're just a copy.
Aren't y'all still part of it?
Yeah.
Calm down.
So you go to that and you're going to be able to get a queen on your money.
You got to 18 and moved out.
Do you have the queen on your money?
True, we do.
Y'all still live with your mom.
But who wants to see a bunch of old white dudes?
I'd rather see some white women.
You want, wouldn't you rather see white women?
Yo, talk that shit.
Talk that shit, bro.
Especially if you tip it at the fucking trip.
Tip with some hard.
You're gonna have some fucking water.
You're a bitch looking at you, judging.
You're a white woman.
You know what I'm saying?
How dare you?
Your pockets look stupid with money.
It's stupid.
But we're in strip clubs and we throw in bills like they know it's real money.
I don't throw bills at strips.
We're not throwing no coins.
You're gonna throw a $10 bill.
I threw coins at these bitches when I was in Edmonton.
I did.
I swear to God.
I was throwing loonies and toonies, buddy.
I was chucking them toonies at these girls.
I was.
And what they did is they rolled up a flyer and they rolled it up into a coin and you try to throw it into that coin.
Did that lead into their pussy?
Yep.
That's dope.
Damn.
Yeah.
It's on another level.
That's dope.
You can't do that in America with coins.
No, I've thrown quarters at girls here.
Like a roll of quarters?
Yeah.
Damn, the homestoke out.
Some bitch bathing in a fountain.
No, but for real, they was throwing coins at these girls, bro.
I don't care.
Yeah.
That's fucked up, dude.
We're making hell.
I don't know.
On some real shit, though, if you guys hear somebody's in the military, unless they've been deployed or they got some kind of combat role, fuck them.
Really?
Yeah, I'm going to keep it a stack.
I know we say, like, thank you for your service.
A lot of motherfuckers just stay behind a computer and type.
Okay.
Like, a lot of them just got.
Yeah, let them know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You got service members will tell you to say, like, there's levels.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're not.
Right.
And so that's why I cringe whenever people are like, thank you for.
I didn't do shit.
I did my, I did my initial contract and then I bailed.
What'd you do?
I did my just so the way it works is you do your first contract.
That's either three to four or five years, right?
So for me, I was just an intelligence operator.
So I was working behind a keyboard.
Yeah.
You feel me?
So I wasn't going overseas.
Yeah, everybody learns how to fire their guns and do all that stuff.
Yeah.
Not everybody gets a dangerous job.
That's a pet peeve of mine when everyone just hears like a small book of veteran, but you've been levels.
At least you contribute.
Like I have, that's one regret that I have is I didn't serve.
Really?
Yeah, I wish I did at least like, I think, what is it, basic?
And I think you do two years, I think.
Depending on what contract or what job you take.
But I wish I did that.
I wish I dedicated some time.
What role would you be?
Probably captain, general, four-star general.
I would have done four-star general, probably.
You would have enlisted as a general?
Yeah, yeah.
I would just probably do four-star general.
That's what I would go out for.
I'd be like, yeah, it's time.
But didn't you manage restaurants?
Yeah, I managed restaurants.
But how did that go?
Well, both of them are out of business.
Like, restaurants are different than people.
Because I would try to make those Mexicans drop and give me 20, but them motherfuckers wouldn't do it.
They just give me pesos.
If the food is late, drop and give me 20.
You were in New York.
They weren't Mexicans.
They were Dominican.
No, this was in Santa Barbara, California.
Yeah, I went to college out there.
That's mad.
Yeah.
But it is one of my regrets, man.
I wish I was part.
I wish I contributed to it.
Like, I wish, you know, you put, regardless if you believe it or not, you signed up to potentially put your life on the line.
Maybe you weren't in the situation to do it, but that is what happens.
Now, you don't maybe believe that, but the reality is, is if you're in the army and it's go time, you're going to be the one that's on the lines.
So at least that's what I think.
I was like, I wanted to contribute in that way.
And I never did.
My dad was in the army.
You know what I mean?
Like, I wish I did that.
And now I'm probably too old, but I wish I did that.
I know.
Oh, you're not too old.
You can still join me.
Now I'm too old.
I think you're not doing a wave now.
And then I accept it.
What am I saying?
Accepting?
No, but you know what you should offer?
We're going to do some USO shows.
We're going to do some bases.
You're going to do some comedy.
You're going to get a lot of people.
I appreciate that.
The kind of love you get for doing those shows.
Like the setup is never great, but the crowd is excited.
You know what I mean?
They can't wait.
They just haven't seen nobody when they watch you on YouTube.
So, like, oh, this guy's coming out the way for us.
So they're high energy.
So I always, I always, I always, that's something I got you got to do.
Do I got to do miss halls?
You never, you never did.
Which military do you want to play?
Haiti Driver Gun Situation00:13:40
It's dope.
Which military?
Yeah.
Joseph Coney.
I want to do the kid show, bro.
It'll be PG.
It'll be fine.
We'll do it.
I'll bring puppets or something.
I want to do it here.
Yeah, you know who can't use the puppets.
Shit.
Dude, no, you know what we should do?
Drew.
I'm mad at it.
Aircraft carrier.
So I'm listening in the Navy.
You can either land on a helicopter or on a jet on the dude.
The aircraft carrier would be so.
So whoever in the Navy is listening up that social chair or something.
Yo, we got the only shit.
See what you did to your fucking job, man.
Turn it into a fraternity, bro.
Hey, I'm the only other veteran in the room.
You spent two days in the Jewish army.
I did one week in the Israeli army, gotna.
And say what really happened.
You weren't really in the army, still kids.
What do you say?
How many rocks did you see?
Damn.
Shout out to my Palestinians.
Jesus Christ.
Hey, you know what?
That's it.
That's the one.
That's the one.
In 10 years, they're going to take that clip and try to cancel this.
I'm keeping the recording of this shit.
Just for myself, blessing, permission.
You're good.
You're good.
I love it.
I love it.
Oh, that's why you didn't want to cover Patland with why you can't cover Palestine?
No, it's just like it was as a topic.
I feel like the constant.
I remember watching this video.
Yeah.
I remember you put out a video.
Yeah, it's like everyone's like, yo, at that time, everyone's like, yo, talk about it, talk about it.
And like, you people got mad when we did it.
They're like, oh, you're a piece of shit person.
You're supporting like apartheid or whatever.
Yeah.
And I'm like, yo, listen, I'm not your mouthpiece.
One, two.
I also don't want to read up on the issue.
I don't give a fuck.
Yeah.
I'll be honest with you.
Yeah.
You know, and that sounds like cruel to people, but if we're keeping it a stack, a lot of us don't give a fuck about a lot of topics or a lot of people suffering.
Right?
People see it on TCNN.
They'll see Myanmar burning people with napalm.
They're like, I'm going to make this channel.
Right.
And it's like, you're not a bad person for not taking on the world suffering all the time.
Right.
And so I think for folks at home, they're concerned with a specific issue.
So they want you as their mouthpiece almost to speak for them and the injustice that they feel.
But it's like, bruv, there's so many issues.
I don't have the time or the energy to get outraged by everything.
I want to be able to just chill sometimes and kick back and not have to be like, another genocide's happening.
Oh, yes, the Uyghurs.
Oh, Ethiopia's civil war.
Haiti's having fucking unrest because they just assess.
Like, bruv, it's a lot of news and it's not good for your head.
It's not.
So when the Palestine stuff happened at that time, like middle COVID, a bunch of shit was happening.
I need a break.
And motherfuckers got mad.
So I'm like, you know what?
You wanted a video?
I'll give it to you.
I don't give a fuck.
And I'll tell you what a lot of people feel, but they won't say because it's rude.
But if you're being honest, most people don't give a shit about your issues.
And it's okay.
That's what that Chamoff guy said about the Uyghurs.
You remember that?
Yeah.
And people got mad at him because they're like, yo, that's so inconsiderate.
Not because he made them realize how they felt.
Yeah.
That's why they get angry.
He pulled a mirror on society.
Yeah, pretty much.
And you realize you feel the same way.
I don't want to feel this.
I don't even, you want me to talk about Palestine?
I don't even talk about Haiti.
I'm Haitian.
Yeah.
Like, I'm not going to talk about it.
But let's talk about Haiti.
Let's talk about the situation there.
Let's talk about the Haitian army.
There's no Haitian army.
Is there not?
Nope.
Why not?
Because the United States of America had them removed.
You're welcome.
That's why.
Armies can be an inconvenience.
You know what I mean?
It's mostly people on a computer or whatever he was saying.
So what is it?
Like a police force or something?
There's a police force.
And is it wild?
Not wild.
Right now, like, they shot the president.
Yeah.
They just shot the president.
They shot the president.
They did the shoot.
They assassinated them.
They assassinated that dude.
And then the people that are running the country are pretty much gang members.
Really?
Katsama Wuzu and all them motherfuckers.
They're all over the place.
Really?
Katsama Wuzu is like a gang over there.
And are they at all connected with the, what is it? Zopound?
Zopound is just Miami.
But no connection to Haiti?
I wouldn't know.
I'm not that deep.
You're not that deep.
No, no.
Sure, you aren't.
Sure you aren't.
Speaking of which.
Speaking of which, we were in Haiti before a lot of this started popping out.
We were there for the World Cup, but we were there to do comedy.
So we were doing like a comedy tour in Haiti.
Yeah.
And there's a lot of civil unrest because they were raising gas prices.
And so people are like, we can't live on this.
Like, we need to be able to move about.
But y'all raising the gas prices with inflation.
So like, nah, we're not taking that.
So the craziest thing happened.
Brazil was playing Belgium, and Haitians love the Brazilian national team.
Okay.
So they.
Why is that?
I don't know, man.
Haitians have two teams.
It's Brazil and Argentina.
I don't really know why, but just the best, closest teams, maybe?
Probably, yeah.
Okay.
And so they waited for the game to end.
Brazil lost.
And the moment Brazil lost to Belgium, they shut down the whole country.
I'm talking about roadblocks everywhere.
They threw tires, set them on fire.
Nobody's moving.
Well, we were still there.
We were like.
But it's very smart.
That's what we should do in Ottawa with these people.
Yeah, that'd be crazy.
With these people trying to take over our country like that.
Al, Al?
Stop that.
Stop that.
I shut that door.
But I'm like, I can't get sidetracked with you.
That's annoying.
Stop.
You guys have to stop the unrest and the taking it over.
Okay.
You can tell the rest of this place.
Please continue your story about Jack Man, right?
So we're cut there.
Like, we're stuck there, right?
There's roadblocks.
So basically, all the gang members are ruling the roads.
They don't want nobody to pass, right?
So, every day that we missed our flight already, we were with the organizers, and every day we spend there, we are losing money.
And this motherfucker's like, Yo, nigga, we knew we're losing money.
Yeah, we need to go back.
Yeah, like, all right.
Every time I go to the to anywhere in the Caribbean, I buy machetes.
I go to the country, I buy a machete.
Okay, why?
Because a machete is a symbol of power.
That's what gave the revolution.
That's what did the revolution for the Haitians.
But it's also a tool that built all the Caribbean.
You know what I mean?
You can chop sugar canes and stuff.
But I buy, but I buy machetes.
I'm a fan of machetes.
I like that.
I like if you like guns, you buy guns.
I like machetes.
I buy machetes.
I buy both.
Anyways, that's besides the point.
So I go there.
But this is the Haitian army, right?
This is why y'all can't have an army.
This is why.
Y'all fuck it up.
We gave y'all some guns.
She started putting machetes at the front of it.
And we're like, all right, take this shit back immediately.
These guys are wild.
Look how excited he gets just talking about it.
Ain't no way y'all can have an army.
Dominican Republic be done if y'all had a fucking army.
That'd be fun.
The warlord, bro.
So I buy a machete, and everybody's looking at me weird and stuff like that.
Whatever.
It's in my luggage and shit.
So this shit's popping off.
And I'm like, all right, we got to go.
I put all the team together.
Like, look, listen, we got to go, right?
We got to go.
We're going now.
Yeah.
So we made our own little freedom convoy.
It was like three cars.
Yeah.
And we need to leave, go to the closest hotel, which is near the airport.
That's like three hours away.
Go ahead.
The funniest thing is, like, the organizers brought us here for the festival.
So they brought us to Haiti.
When it was time to leave, they were terrified.
They didn't know what to do.
They started panicking.
So our organizers just got lost.
And this is our first time in Haiti.
So the funniest part about us having to leave that city was the first truck, which is the one that's got to deal with all the roadblocks.
It was our driver, Delgado.
Shout out to him.
Preach and me.
So imagine you're a guest in another country.
Shit pops off and them motherfuckers in the front.
Yeah, yeah, that's always put the army in the front.
That's insane.
But we're there, and these motherfuckers are not doing anything.
So we're in front.
So we get to a roadblock.
I'm talking about trees, cars, and everything and stuff.
I get out the car, take out the roadblocks, whatever, do a passage for all the cars to pass.
So we go one roadblock, two roadblocks, three roadblocks.
We have to discuss with the people.
I speak Creole, so I'm all right.
So I, you know, you know, you, you, you talk, you deal with them.
You want smoke?
What do you want?
Money, smoke, uh, little girls, because I call me.
Anyways, get in.
I made you look down.
That was good.
That was good.
We pass.
Uh, at some point, uh, they don't want to let us pass, and they're getting very rowdy.
And that's not really me, all right?
That's it's all the driver.
The driver gets out of there.
This motherfucker, the whole trip, we were there for two weeks.
He haven't said one word.
I think he grunts one time.
He gets out the car and he tells him in Creole.
I'm gonna translate for you.
He's like, Yo, these guys have machete picks and stuff like that.
He's like, Yo, you guys have peasant tools.
Well, we riot, we have guns.
You haven't gonna let us pass.
If you don't let us pass, I'm coming back here and I'm shooting all of y'all.
You said that.
No, he said that.
I'm in the car, and I was in the back, like, oh, nigga, if something pops off, you drive off.
And my leg was already over there.
One step ahead of you, buddy.
When he said that shit, in my head, he was already dead.
Oh, yeah.
In my head, I'm like, I was like, I told Preach, I said, Yo, the stick's already ready.
Just jump over and then what's about to pop off.
This man, after he says that shit, these guys all go off into the bushes.
Oh, that's the second roadblock.
After that, that we went.
He went back and they let us in, and then we get to another roadblock.
You know, the roadblock where they were throwing bottles at us for us not to advance.
Yeah, and then he gets off the car.
And my machete ready between my leg like that, but it's wrapped in paper.
So I'm like that, right?
I'm like, I'm just, I'm just like that.
I got my sunglasses and I got my head all tied up.
And you have to understand that tattoos are not something that is very common in Haiti.
Oh, really?
Right?
It's either you have tattoos either because you're American, either you're a gang member.
So my whole sleeve done up, my whole leg done up.
Okay.
I got my short shorts, everything showing.
I'm just sitting with this in my hands like that.
And they go off in the woods.
I'm just talking to Abba.
He's in the back seat.
I'm like, yo, this shit's fucked up.
Yeah, it's fucked up for real.
And then Abba just goes, like, is this nigga doing some push-ups?
And I look over.
The driver is talking to the chief, the gang of this, and he's doing push-ups with his shirt off.
And he's just looking at the dude like we can't hear what he's saying.
Like, what the fuck is going on?
They point at us and they go back and like he starts coming back in the car.
No, that's not it.
He does some push-ups, and there's a guy that comes to the car, look every inside the car.
And I'm just, I speak Haitians, I'm like, I speak Creole.
I'm like, yo, I got fed on for him.
Yeah, no, I'm on shape.
And he runs towards them.
And I'm like, fuck up.
What the fuck is going on?
And they're screaming.
The driver comes back and I'm like, why?
I'm like, Ian is in the car laughing.
I'm like, why are you laughing?
And he's like, oh, because they thought you had a gun.
Huh?
Yeah.
He's like, yo, yeah, I got a gun to dread in the car.
He has a gun.
I'm like, he ain't got no gun.
You know what?
If you don't let us pass, he's going to come out with his gun.
And I was like, did you use me?
You used me.
And we left.
We were both because they were scared I had a gun, but it wasn't my machete.
Yeah, they saw the butt because the way he had itself like he said of the machete and they thought he had like an AK or something.
I thought I had like 12k.
You can kind of mistake it.
So that ended up working in our favor.
And my hand was on that.
And the driver just knew to lie.
He's just, yeah, he's just smart.
He's just poker.
Poker face.
He's just poker.
Dude, the push-up move is brilliant.
Crazy.
But yeah, we have to do that.
Just how comfortable he felt in that environment, you could tell he's used to gang life.
Yeah.
So I had to, yeah, undo barricades and blockies and shit like that.
I'm cutting a lot of shit out.
At some point, we had to go to the forest.
I was leading that shit with my machete.
That shit was mad.
In the forest, and the other cars were following me.
And I'm like, yo, pass there.
It's better.
Because it was a huge puddle.
Anyways, it was wild.
Cutting a lot of shit out.
But yeah.
How long until you got to the airport?
Three.
Well, it got three hours before we got to the hotel.
Then we stayed at the hotel two days.
Yeah.
And then we got at the airport, same thing on the way to the airport.
It was still not safe.
So I was in front.
Have you ever been to a place like that?
You ever been to a place where like there's no clear sense of order?
Gang Life Machete Moments00:04:04
Like you could kind of feel like you ever been to a really bad neighborhood and you know nobody really patrols around here and like the rules are not kind of set.
You get what I'm saying?
A little bit, but not like that though.
I had the same feeling when I went to some spa parts in New Orleans.
But anyways, all this to say, there's certain places you go to in the world where you're just like, there's no rules here.
Like what happens is just something that happened to you.
And there's going to be no justice.
Nobody's going to come fix things.
So you better fend for yourself because if you don't, you're fucked.
Well, that's what it was like for us when we got there.
It was ordered when we were there, and then everything popped off, and then everything shifted.
So, even when we got to Port-au-Prince, it was still there's nobody patrolling the streets.
All the police guards are staying at home or guarding the really important people.
So, if you get shot in the streets, like that's just something that happened.
So, it was a weird tension.
They're going to drag after five hours, they're going to finally drag your body out.
Yeah, because you know, sometimes in some places, you're not allowed.
If someone gets caught in the middle of the street, you're not allowed to touch the body.
Yeah, it's a message.
Oh, shit, they want everybody to know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, after a while, they're going to drag your body.
Like, you're going to go around.
Oh, shit, dead body.
And eventually, they'll drag your body out.
But, you know, there's not going to be anything.
That's why I can't go.
I don't, I can't go now.
My parents won't let me go to hate that was supposed to go with my dad.
We've been planning that shit, but we don't want to go.
I mean, right now they got all them kidnappers.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
But it's kidnapped.
When we left, when we left that story that I just told them and chatting and everything, that was in 2018.
That was damn now.
Things have deteriorated.
You know, it's unfortunate because the country itself is actually a wonderful place.
Like, when we were there, before everything popped up, had a wicked time.
People were so gracious.
Like, even without much, like, you could feel a lot of love.
They were very welcoming.
We shot a documentary there.
And everybody was so cool with us.
Even in dangerous parts, people were like really accepting.
So, you know, I think due to like the outside issue politically and like a lot of the choices made from the leaders, like it gets a super bad rap.
But my experience with the Haitian people is just absolutely wonderful.
So we tell this story, but it's not a real reflection of what life is like.
They're just going through a really bad spell right now.
But yeah, even if all this happened, I still want to go back.
Yeah.
Same.
I want to go back.
Does it change?
Like, do you guys feel guilt because of your success when you see what people are going through?
Like even family members from where you're from?
Where's your family from?
Ethiopia.
Ethiopia.
Like, is there any part of you that goes, like, for example, like, I have this huge advantage where like, yeah, my mom came from like very working class background in like Scotland, but it's not like destitute poverty.
Yeah.
Right.
So, and then like my dad was like New York and that kind of thing so I'm never going like, oh, I got to take all this money and I got to send it back home.
I got to, do you guys feel that at all?
Or I don't feel that with my listening my people from home and stuff like that.
I'm grateful for my parents to make the choices that they made to come to Canada and stuff like that and do what they did.
Very, very smart with their money and stuff like that.
So I'm grateful.
I don't feel like I most of my family is actually in the States or in Canada.
So I don't feel like I have to, like, if you fucked up, there's less like survivals, survivors guilt or something.
Exactly.
But I had an issue.
I had a little issue during the pandemic with all my co-workers that was working and that couldn't work no more.
Yeah.
And now I felt some type of way.
I was lying about, I'm still lying about my income.
I'm lying about a bunch of shit.
Really?
I'm lying.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just, yeah, how you doing?
I'm all right.
But during the pandemic, that shit blew the fuck off.
Before the company ended, we had 235,000.
Yeah.
And now with the pandemic, people ain't got nothing to do.
But, dude, but with my other co-workers that had bars and just were working in bars and stuff like that.
And I couldn't work no more.
That felt some type of way.
Yeah.
For three days.
After that, it was a weekend.
It was a weekend.
A weekend.
It was a long weekend.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What about you?
Pandemic Bar Successes00:14:32
You're poor homies.
The guys you came up with that are dead broke.
You know what I'm saying?
Or struggling financially.
You don't feel some type of way?
Nope.
No, I mean, like, the homies, homies, I've always looked out for.
Like, my circle, I keep like a smaller circle of people that I feel responsible for.
I have to take care of.
Sure.
And I know there's a lot of people, especially in entertainment, like they're friends with everybody.
And I'm acquaintances with a lot of people.
And I really believe in a lot of people.
I think they're great.
But if you're like the homie, homie, then I have to make sure you're good.
And you can't make sure everybody's good.
No.
So, yeah, I reserve those positions for the people who are just like fucking, I love and ride or die, loyal, like, and that's what they're going to get from me.
Yeah.
I feel weird about even talking about money still.
Like, I still live in the same apartment that I've lived in the seven years.
You know what I mean?
I don't change too much, but I'm also very low-key.
I don't want people to really know because I feel I worry that my interactions with the people I enjoy spending time with is going to change substantially because like you're in a different tax practice all of a sudden.
So I think for me, I don't know if it's going to happen, but I've seen how money changes a lot of folks or like how it changes the folks around them.
So for me, I've always been a little bit.
Are you talking to people who got some money now?
Some people, but like the people who are I'm close with, no.
But you should because they got game.
All right, guys, let me take a break for a second.
Let's be honest, okay?
We got Super Bowl 56 to gamble on.
And where are you going to gamble?
You're going to gamble with my bookie, okay?
You're going to gamble with my bookie because my bookie fucks with us.
Let's just keep it a buck.
My bookie fucks with us.
And if they fuck with us, that means they fuck with you.
Okay?
Because you fuck with us.
It goes the long way.
They're doubling that initial deposit bonus.
That means you put up the bread, they're going to double it.
That's more money for you to win.
It's a Super Bowl.
You got a 50% chance of winning if you gamble on one of the teams.
You know what I'm saying?
If you just gamble on one of the teams winning, you got 50% chance of winning, Mark.
That makes sense.
That's a soccer.
Say what?
Not even soccer.
Because you could tie.
Dumbass.
Dumbass sport.
I want to use another one.
I could tie now.
No, you can't tie not in the Super Bowl, Dove.
True.
Okay?
Let me tell you something about my bookie.
You use our promo code Flagrant.
You're going to get your first deposit bonus match up to $1,000.
Okay.
All you got to do is go to mybookie.ag, use our promo code Flagrant.
MyBookie.AG.
Gamble, win, and spend that bread.
You're welcome.
You're welcome.
Real talk.
Real talk.
You are welcome.
Let's get back to the show.
People who got money got it for a reason.
It's not a lottery, right?
Like, and these motherfuckers talk to other people who got money.
Sure.
And they're just sharing game.
And it's not only, like, we look at like how money gets consolidated amongst the rich.
And like part of that is because like these people are just creating these insane businesses and taking advantage of like this capitalist system, right?
Ourselves as well.
But other parts is like, they're just sharing game with each other.
Sure.
They, oh, this company's about to IPO.
Nobody really knows.
You should get in now.
Tons of those conversations going around.
And like learning about these things, like learning about these little like tax hacks, all that kind of stuff is super valuable, not just for you, but for your people that don't have access to that.
So I think there's a lot of people who first get money and they're like a little bit insecure to like talk to people who have been established who have it.
But like it's almost like our duty.
When I get like Duval hit me the other day because I was talking about this shit that I found out about like the G-Wagons.
And Duval was like, man, stop giving up game.
And I'm like, man, I'm upset.
I'm upset that I didn't know this shit and nobody told me.
He goes, they ain't tell you because you're going to tell everybody.
And then there's going to make it harder for us to access it.
Right.
But it's like, low-key, I think it's kind of our responsibility to share that.
I don't disagree on sharing game or tips in that regards.
I think the discussion is different when once you put numbers on it, it feels different.
And I don't know about you, but I always like to.
What do you mean by that?
Numbers on it.
Like, if you talk to somebody, like, oh, you're like, have you made a million yet?
Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's different.
You get what I'm saying?
Because I know that crab in the bucket mentality.
I know that, and I'm not even mad at it because when you're struggling, struggling, and you don't know how to make ends meet, it's weird to see your man's all of a sudden got more money for like his family and everything.
You feel what I'm saying?
Yeah.
And so I think that's what I worry about.
That's not your homie, though.
If he's upset that you're winning, no.
That's not your homie.
I don't disagree, but I do know.
Y'all were struggle buddies.
And then you stopped struggling, and then he was like, well, fuck this.
You know what I mean?
It's fair.
Yeah, that's your homies should be excited.
And then, I don't know, literally, I work with all my best friends.
Like, it's crazy.
So it's just like, I don't know.
Those opportunities become plentiful.
I think I have my friends who I can do that with, but I also know some folks who like the struggle is so real.
And it's hard for them to accept like what you're doing when like they can't even make their next rent.
You know what I'm saying?
It's almost like, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
And it clouds their judgment.
Yeah.
And like, also, like, I want to be able to help, but how do I do that in a productive way?
I can't just throw money on my partner because sometimes that's just not enough, right?
And you also don't want to make somebody dependent, their pride.
So it's a hard thing to manage.
I think for me and money, like, I'm not really great with it in terms of how to discuss it with the people.
I'm great at keeping it.
I'm great at like saving it or investing.
That's fine.
But in terms of like sharing the idea, like I just still feel great insecurity around that.
I'm fine.
I'm fine.
Yeah.
I talk with people that got money.
I discuss with it.
All people that know how to manage money.
Yeah.
Like my mom is, I'm grateful to have a mom that worked in a bank.
Oh, that's managing wallets and stuff like that.
That's how I talk to my mom with different things or other people that I know that they got something going on or some tips and shit.
So I was very grateful and privileged to have that around me.
So I do talk about it.
That's lucky.
With people who understand.
We book people.
Just talking with poor people, it's not rewarding.
You know what I'm saying?
When I go to the bank, just cut it.
Just cut that right there.
I go to the bank, you know what I'm saying?
And the guy's like, hey, we want to show you some new accounts.
I was like, why?
I was like, well, as our high-value client, I said, high-value?
Yeah.
But I'm high-value.
But you know, when you go to the bank, we went to the bank, and I went there.
The manager comes downstairs.
Hi, it was a new girl.
Hi, sir.
What can I help you with?
Yeah, this and that.
And that and the third.
Show up in my account.
Like one moment.
And then someone else comes next to her.
Oh, hi, sir.
The fuck is you?
She good.
No, that's not tipping my daff.
That's it.
Yeah, you start getting business cards out there.
That's kind of weird.
And call me every time you want.
Yeah.
Now I was waiting for the girl behind the teller to show me her pussy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm saying, yo, let's get it popping.
I heard me just get it like that.
But you just pull up to the bank just to check the account.
Like, that's it.
You go to the hottest teller.
You'd be like, yeah, can you just tell me how much I got?
Yep.
You see that number?
Okay.
That's all you need.
You don't need to do that at a teller.
Yeah, no.
But nah, that is lucky, though, man.
Like, my parents didn't, like, they weren't savvy.
They made some good decisions.
Like, they purchased real estate because they didn't really understand investment and that kind of stuff.
They just, their family didn't understand it.
It wasn't like passed down.
Like, I have friends that that type of wisdom is just passed down from generation to generation.
Like, they understand investing and all these other things that, like, I just don't know.
Right.
And so anytime that I get to talk to these people, I just remove all ego.
And I'm like, yeah, please give me advice.
What is I, I wasn't learning.
I didn't learn this stuff and I would love my kids too.
Yeah.
Because I'm starting to do it now in my 30s.
What if my kid can do it?
Yeah.
When he's 24?
Yeah.
Like, shit, you got a decade of and that's the thing.
They don't even interest you accrue.
They don't teach you that.
Of course they ain't no teaching.
I'll be, I'll keep it a stack.
My family was super dysfunctional, but there's one thing that mom taught me that I'm so grateful.
Because even when she was absent a lot, like she always said, like, learn to save your money.
She really like pushed that on me.
And to the point, like, it terrified me to be in debt.
She scared the shit out of me with that.
But the benefit of that is, like, that's one of the reasons I'm here today.
Like, after I left the military, I'd saved up enough money to do the artist lifestyle for like three, four years.
So, even though I was doing gigs here and there, I was like slowly going into my savings to be able to sustain that.
But, had I not learned those lessons then, I wouldn't be here.
So, the knowledge you get from the people above you is paramount.
So, for me, obviously, going to the next generation for my kids, I want to make sure that they have that set up.
But also, I want to do community initiatives where we're passing on a lot of this information that seems hard to get, but it's really not.
Yeah, you just need to hear it.
You just need to hear and to really understand it.
So, I always tell my mom, like, yo, you know how I made a lot of money?
I'm like, You get a cut because you earned it.
Yeah, she did.
It feels good.
How much fun is it to tell your mom how much you made?
Well, you must you saw me when I told her, no, at the show.
That's the first time she knew I did comedy.
What?
Yeah, when he put, yeah, when he told us a month ago, he told his brother, I didn't know that.
He told them someone I brought up on stage.
Okay, so they don't know the context.
So, what do we think?
That's the first show.
She didn't know I did comedy, she didn't know I did YouTube, she didn't do anything.
Yeah, set the stage because these people don't know the show.
So, we did a Just for Laugh show, and there was like 15,000 people who were in attendance.
And we're about like three years in the game at that point in terms of doing stand-up specifically by the YouTube channel.
It was an outdoor show the entire.
I mean, it looked like the president put into office, like it was the great lawn.
It was unbelievable.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what, yeah.
We'll talk about that.
I bombed, yeah, we'll talk about that after.
So, the show is going on, and I wanted two weeks out.
I'm like, I should invite my mom, but I didn't know how to tell her, so I didn't.
And so, I'm like, Listen, I'm graduating from university.
She didn't even know I was going to school.
She's like, You're going to school?
I'm like, Yeah, because immigrant families, like, there's a weird thing with doing the arts where they're just like, What are you doing?
That's a waste of time.
And that makes sense, though.
Like, there's all this judgment for that, but it's just like, imagine you just made it to America and you're giving your kids all this opportunity to go be a fucking lawyer, doctor, or anything.
They're like, I want to be a clown.
Yeah, what?
That's funny how they make it.
I risk everything so you could go tell your jokes.
Yeah, 100%.
My was worse.
Not only was I a high school dropout, but from a Muslim family who joined the military during the Iraq War, I was disowned for a couple of years.
Did you say you were stoned for a couple years?
Hold on, bro.
Hold on.
Which side were you fighting for?
So, my mom, I just didn't feel comfortable telling her anything until it was solid.
But even when it became solid, I just had a hard time like opening that door.
I would just hand her a check every night.
She's like, How'd you get that?
I'm like, Don't worry about it.
She probably thought it was drugs or something.
She didn't understand, but I was like, Don't worry about it.
But your faith for sure.
So, you know, I said, I wanted to tell her, but I just didn't know how.
So, I'm like, Let me just go big.
You know, I'm gonna just bring her.
I asked my brother to help me out.
I told her I was going to school and graduate.
I want you to be at my graduate.
So, she brought flowers and everything.
And so, she comes backstage.
She's confused.
You know, she can't see the front stage, but she hears all the noise.
She's like, You guys doing outdoor graduation?
I'm like, Yeah, mom, it's gonna be awesome.
This motherfucker.
And then, I just at one point during the show, just before you came up, I brought my mom up on, and I'm like, Oh, this is what I do, mom.
And she goes, Oh, she panics because she's never seen so many people and she doesn't know how to handle the stage thing.
Yeah, um, but that was the first shot for that, bro.
Um, we're gonna.
Can you bring up the video just to set the stage for everybody at home?
I have a video of me walking on stage at least so they can see what this thing looked.
I mean, this is insane.
But yeah, that's crazy that we talked about it.
But she proudly, she was beaming in her face.
Yeah, that's good.
Um, when I went backstage, and after that, I saw her looking at the screen, looking at you, tell Joe's, and people were laughing.
Yeah, hey, shey, I was like, oh man, that is because it isn't that they don't want you to do the thing in the arts, yeah, they just want you to be successful.
And it is absolutely, it's like they risked everything, but it's like the chances of being successful in this are like the chances of being successful for them back home.
Yes, so they're like, why the fuck did I come over here?
Yeah, like you have security, you can access it.
But the second they see that it works, yeah, they just want to know you're okay.
I didn't, yeah, there you go.
Let me see.
Let me see.
No, It's an excellent.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
There you go.
Oh, God.
There you go.
Yeah.
God damn.
Oh, dude.
Look at it.
It's a block.
Yo.
You can't see it, but there's screens over there.
Like my back.
There's Al did a great job.
Yeah.
Cinematographer.
Yeah, that was great.
I gotta give you a shout.
I mean, look at that.
Are you kidding me?
That's crazy.
My parents are in the VIP up there.
Yeah.
They kicked back.
But even then, like, just 50 minutes before the show, there was not that many people, right?
Well, 30 minutes before the show, there was not that many people.
My mom was like, okay, yeah, there's a lot of, there's like about 5,000 people in front of them.
Like, oh, yeah, there's a nice little crowd.
I don't know what happened at 8:45, 15 minutes before the show.
It's storm at packing.
She was like, oh, okay, that's what he does does.
And that's what he understood.
And that's where my imposter syndrome kicked out.
No, it dropped.
Oh, you felt justified.
It was like, it's real.
It's a little comedy.
And I've been an opener for Mike Ward for a while now.
And then when that happened after that show, I was like, I think I'm good.
I think that's what I do.
Yeah.
I think after that show, I was like, okay, I think we got something here.
That's funny because you guys put out a video saying, I don't know if it's going to be a thousand people or if it's going to be 15,000.
What do you say?
A thousand, a thousand.
I mean, I had no clue.
I couldn't fathom that it would be that big.
You guys weren't even that big back then.
No, we weren't.
But we were actually big in the city, but not outside.
That's why they booked us.
At the beginning, we were just doing things in the city.
So we had a huge fan base there.
Okay, that makes sense.
But I was like, yeah.
I mean, it blew.
Yeah, that thing blew up.
And it was an interesting moment for me because you can't conceptualize being successful.
Like, for me, I couldn't conceptualize being successful.
Prenup Alimony Fairness00:15:57
Yeah.
I just did the work every day.
And I'm like, if it grows, that's cool.
But when you see a crowd like that, that's stuff you see from like rock stars.
You get what I'm saying?
That shit.
That's it.
You see a seat.
I've never done a comedy show like that ever again.
Maybe in the future, but you know, when you got Singapore City, it's a different feeling when you see a crowd like a concert crowd.
This is what musicians feel.
That was nuts.
Yeah.
I mean, it was just like 10 minutes before the show.
We're in the backstage, right?
And I'm just there focusing my shit.
And he probably just went to see the crowd stack up.
And he goes back to the backstage.
And he's like, so who's this for?
And I'm like, they came to see us.
Yeah.
But it sounded so rude.
Yeah, go ahead.
Go ahead.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah, it's us.
Like, oh, my bad.
It's not.
It's just.
Yeah.
I had my machete eyes, right?
Yeah.
Sorry about that.
Did you, when was your first moment like that?
Where was your first moment where you saw a scene and you were like, okay?
Hmm.
That's a great question.
Where I saw an amount of people that made me feel that way?
Maybe there's like, maybe it's not even the amount of people.
Was there a moment where you were like, this, this is it?
Not that it was, it was two that kind of like crept on one another.
Because I thought it was serendipitous at first, and then I realized it was because of something I put out.
Okay.
And it was just after I released the first my first special on YouTube, I had sold out a club and I thought it was just lucky.
And I was like, oh, maybe I would have sold that club out.
And then the next weekend, I sold out another club.
And I was like, wait.
I was like, wait a minute, is that because of the special?
And I remember asking the club, man, what's going on?
Yeah, people have been saying that they watch you on YouTube.
And I'm like, really?
Like, this is before YouTube was even like a thing.
And there was Russell Peters, of course, don't get me wrong, but like, I didn't realize that that would actually translate.
And then the next club, I sold out.
And it was those three events where I go, oh, shit, something's happening right now.
Like, whoa, it's fucking happening.
And how exciting is that?
Because it's so interesting.
Like, like you said, like views on YouTube are awesome and it's great.
But like, there is a transformative experience when you walk in front of the people.
When the people see those view, those videos, and then they go, I'm going to leave the house for you.
Yeah, that shit hits different.
There was a moment where when we started to do comedy, we did little shows, like 60 people, 50 people, and everything.
And then there's a video that got out and got really popular in Montreal.
And we had a show two weeks after.
And I went to Abbey and I was like, bro, we have to cancel the show.
He's like, what the fuck are you talking about?
We have to cancel the show.
I don't want to refuse people out the door.
We're not canceling.
We have to cancel the show.
We have to.
We have to get a bigger, bigger venue.
We can't.
Because it was too many.
It was too small.
I didn't want to refuse that many people.
Yeah.
Let's do this shit right.
Let's have.
And that was like a pre-cursor to all of this.
But I remember.
And I was clicking.
Do you guys remember the clip that really went?
Yeah.
It was a, it was a very specific Montreal thing.
Yeah.
That you guys were talking about, joking about.
Exactly.
Yeah.
We did like a comedic video on like a like a racial issue that happened in the city and it blew up on Facebook.
That's when we were on Facebook.
So it was a different time.
But I remember even early, like I was terrified of taking on something too big too early.
I know.
Like even though we had a thousand people who could buy tickets, I'm like, I'm not ready for a thousand thing.
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
I constantly doubted myself that whole process.
We're not ready.
And then we jumped from like 200 to 15,000.
It's like, what the fuck?
But the money was so good, I couldn't say no.
You know what I'm saying?
When they put in the numbers, like, oh, man, that's the, listen, when you never get more than $1,000 for a show.
Yeah.
And $1,000 is big, When you're struggling, $1,000 for doing a 15-minute performance, you'll take that.
Right.
And you get them once every six months.
Well, you take that.
You can't take that.
Because you do open mics for 25 bucks, whatever.
Once every year.
So I remember watching that negotiating table and I said, Preach, let me take you negotiating.
So they're like, yeah, so we sent you guys a contract.
What did you think?
And I'm like, yeah, we understand.
Listen, we'll come back to you guys with a counter offer, but we appreciate it.
So I sent them the number.
I'll just say it was $30,000.
Yeah.
And then we come in the second time and we walk in, we sit down.
And they're like, okay, listen, we learned over the contract.
We like a lot of what you guys do.
We'll accept it.
And I swear to God, I like kick preach.
Yeah.
And I went.
Yeah.
We just try to keep a straight face so they don't know.
But is that?
Because when we got out of there, this crazy that we let out of the car.
Whoa, nigga, what the fuck?
Because when you've never made something like real money from something you built, when you make like a salary paycheck, you know what I'm saying?
You're just like, nigga, is this real?
Is this real?
Right?
Because I just threw the number out there because I'm like, I think I was expecting to negotiate that.
No, they did negotiate down the first year.
We said 30.
They said 24.
Yeah.
But I was like, shit is amazing.
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
I couldn't believe it.
I couldn't believe the number.
Like, this guy gets having.
It's just like, it was such a big number.
And I realized it was the first time, like, damn, niggas, niggas really fuck with us.
Yeah.
Don't pay for our shit.
Because you don't believe anybody would pay that kind of money.
No.
And then you start doing brand deals later and you realize, like, oh, this money's everywhere to be.
Initially, the first time, I swear I went home.
I didn't tell nobody because at the time I still felt like a little weird, but I just remember thinking, like, oh, this is something.
I think, I think Floyd Mayweather said, like, the first hundred thousand he made was way more impactful than a hundred million.
Yes, and it's because that number for like you guys are saying, it's like he couldn't fathom $100,000 where he came from.
$100,000 doesn't make sense.
It doesn't even make sense.
And it gets normalized, I guess, as you make it.
But that first time, bro, that first time.
I still can't spend past the salary that I've always had my whole life.
I'm just used to like Jay Leno.
You're like Jay Leno.
I just can't fathom be like, okay, I make this much.
I can't imagine spending that kind of money.
So for me, it's still like a huge discomfort I feel with the whole thing.
But I think I always said this.
If I could make it.
Did a wife feel good over it.
I don't know.
We're very different on that.
Women get comfy.
They get used to it.
Yeah, my girl was like, I'm going to be a home wife.
No, you're not.
I let her because, no, I let her because she had my back for all those years.
You know, she's been working for a bank for like.
You got to reward that.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm like, ride or die.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Because you were struggling.
Now it's weird because now in a month, you make what you made in your whole life.
That was a different thing.
Yeah.
That doesn't make sense to me.
So when I see like YouTube numbers, I'm like, yeah, sometimes I buy some shit and my girl's going to be like, can we afford it?
And I'm like, no, don't get her too comfy.
No, no, no, no.
Like, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know if we can't afford it this month.
I don't know.
Let me talk to Abba.
See how we're doing.
See how many more videos we're going to make.
I don't know.
You let your wife see all the books?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't get worried since she like grew up poor or whatever.
No, she didn't grow up poor.
Yeah.
Married into some money.
No.
She's going to be watching at home like, that's my boy.
No, no, no.
I think, I think, I don't know.
Like, I don't want to create a barrier right there.
Like, makes sense.
Right?
I think that if you feel like you have to create a barrier right there, there's already some distrust.
You mean hiding?
Yeah, like hiding that kind of stuff.
So, you didn't do no prenup?
No.
See, this is why Fresh and Fit came through, called him a simp.
He didn't do a prenup?
No prenup.
I'm not mad at it.
Did you do a prenup?
I'm not married technically, but I definitely would.
But you can't, though.
I can't.
No, because you met her before you had the money.
Right.
So if you do it, it's unethical.
Yeah.
Yes, it is.
Yeah.
What the fuck you mean?
If she was shooting with you in the gym, you got to give her a cut.
No, I don't.
Well, it depends what that cut is.
UTA.
The contract is: if you with me, you with me.
If you not, you're not.
The reason why I say that is because if she supported you when you was broke and she was paying the bills, now when you made some money, you can't cut her out.
You get what I'm saying?
100%.
No, no, I agree with you on that.
I think that makes a lot of sense.
I just think that, like, that, you know, the 50-50, you know.
If I'm shooting, you rebounding, that's like, I'm going to cut her out.
How much you pay the rebounder?
You know what I'm saying?
Like, how much you pay the rebounder if you're in the gym shooting?
Did Kobe give 50% to the rebounder?
Yo.
Bruv, exactly.
Thank you.
If we're using the shooting as gym analogy.
Now, I do believe that they deserve something.
And I think that getting that amount provides a security.
But that's part of the prenup, though.
Or you could do it in the prenup, or you just do nothing.
And time will tell if I made the right decision or the wrong one.
Right.
Do you know what I mean?
And time will also tell if I get a postnut.
So Tongo will tell all things.
No, but yeah, I don't know.
I feel like if you feel any economic distrust with the person you're about to spend the rest of your life with, that's a problem.
That's a sign of concern.
And I don't think you should get married in the first place.
I'm not mad at that.
Now, if you are somebody that has, if you're like fucking Bezos or something like that and you've got like stupid, stupid, stupid money, even if you feel no economic concern at all, you're gonna because you could potentially be a mark.
I don't know if Bezos that word.
I feel like you just pay somebody to kill the bitch.
Yo, real talk, yes.
But also, like, if you're not having kids, like, what's the point?
Yeah.
Like, you don't need to get remarried.
Yeah.
Like, if you, if you're having kids, like, that's another thing I think.
Like, if you bring kids into the picture, bro, like, and you're raising my kids, what am I going to do?
Leave you broke?
That's some loser shit, though.
That's some loser fucking shit.
I'm going to have my kids.
Actually, low-key is like, oh, daddy's house is fire.
You know what I mean?
Oh, why's your mom's house like that?
That's crazy.
It was cold.
But like, that is some loser shit, in my opinion.
I'm not.
So, like, yeah, once they give you kids, man, it's like they got to get it.
That's how I feel.
They got to get a little something.
They got to get a lot of something.
Yeah.
I think I understand.
They got to get a lot.
I understand the general feel of a lot of dudes, like, because they've seen the stories of what happens in family courts or in divorce courts and they've seen the dudes being broken by a lot of stuff.
I understand the fear that a lot of people have.
And I think some of it's very, very, very valid.
It is valid.
Like, nobody can look at that and be like, oh, insecure guys, beta, whatever.
Like, you insult.
No, I think, like, yeah, it is a very difficult thing when you hear a story about a dude who gets cheated on.
The bitch moves in with the new nigga.
And then you still.
Kicks you out of your own house.
You still pay for it.
Pays half your shit.
Yeah.
Keeps the kids.
It's like, damn, is this fair?
That's the terrifying thing.
Because as dudes, if we're going to make that and we're going to do that trust, to find out it can get flipped on us because you felt some type of way, that's mad.
I told my wife, I'll never pay, what is that shit called?
Alimony.
Alimony.
I said, I'll never pay out.
I'll go to jail before I pay alimony.
I would gladly go to prison before I pay you to fuck someone else.
Like, if I'm paying you, it's my booze.
Do you know what I mean?
Like, let's just keep it.
It's smart.
You know what I'm saying?
It's my boost.
I'm paying.
I'm paying.
And then you out here going on dates and shit like that.
And that for going on vacation.
And that for your kids.
No, alimony is not for the kids trying to support alimony.
Yo, my kids are always going to get support.
You don't even need to ask for that.
Alimony is just paying because she was married to you.
Yeah.
That's facts.
Yeah, but the alimony goes to, well, you could separate it, but like the payment for the house that the kids are in.
Are you a lawyer?
I think he just Jewish.
He said, he said, just Jewish.
Nah, nah, that's crazy.
That whole idea is.
And obviously, if she like remarries.
Say again?
If she remarries, you don't pay out.
Yeah, but then you know that women are not going to remarry.
You don't go to stay with a boy.
Exactly.
She's not stupid.
That shit happens, bro.
They just go boyfriend, girlfriend, because that dude also wants some nice little check coming in.
That's crazy, bro.
That's crazy.
So what's the rule?
It's the person that's making the most money, right?
Who coughs up the alimony?
Hell yeah.
Britney Spears is coughing up alimony and shit.
Which is wild.
Well, why is it wild?
Nah.
What do you mean?
That's equality.
No, that's equality.
If the guy pays it, the girl pays it to you.
Yeah.
No.
If it's a fucked up system, like we understand that alimony is fucked up.
But if that's what we're doing, okay, that's what we're doing.
If the lady makes more money, then you pay alimony.
Just pay child support.
You guys have kids together.
Take care of the kids.
You should get a fucking job so that you can get a lot of people.
I'm thinking about alimony is already there.
We're not getting rid of that.
I disagree in this regard.
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Okay.
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Okay.
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You know what I mean?
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This is Valentine's Day.
This is her day.
Make sure that she is sucking on a dolphin dick.
Okay?
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Let's get back to this show.
I think when you get married, oftentimes there's oftentimes a demand from one of the partners to either leave their job, leave their careers, take more of the home stuff.
So they're sacrificing a lot of their potential future earnings by staying at home more often to support their marriage in their way while you're making your income and advancing your career.
So it doesn't make sense that in a divorce, you're telling them, bitch, good luck.
Well, I have to sacrifice seven years of my work life.
I think that makes 100% sense if you're not working so you can take care of the kids.
If you're not working so you could just relax at home, that's your choice.
Like you could have kept working.
Nobody said, I'm going to work.
Fuck you doing all day.
Right?
Like you're allowed.
But if you, that's why I say kids changes the game.
Kids, you got to make sure they're taken care of because they are sacrificing their career.
They are sacrificing their life and they deserve to be protected for that sacrifice.
So if you have kids, you're good.
Okay.
Like you are good no matter what.
She gives you kids.
Nope.
He just fixed his whole state.
Nope.
I'm not paying alimony, bro.
I'm giving a lot of child support.
Lizard Yacht Sacrifices00:15:16
I'll pay a lot of child support and you could call that shit alimony, but I'm calling that shit child support.
Hey, them kids are going to be supported and you're going to be supported, supporting them kids.
But I'm not paying you no fucking alimony.
All Felix, no offense.
That's it.
No, no, 100%.
Like, if we have kids, you're going to get taken care of no matter what.
And what I mean by that is, like, you won't even need alimony because you're going to get a percentage of what I have.
Okay.
Like, alimony is just ridiculous if you're just getting a fucking chunk.
I agree, man.
You need more than the, you need more than the chunk?
Yeah.
That's crazy, bro.
It's like, it's like Dr. Dre divorces his wife.
His wife gets $100 million and she's like, but I also need you to give me $50,000 a month.
For what?
She said shopping, bro.
For shopping.
Can she justify that?
Wouldn't you go to jail?
She wasn't even trying.
Yeah, no, that's not.
I don't know.
I don't know if it's delusion or when you get at a certain point rich, you get all, I don't know what it is.
I'll tell you what it is.
It's a mapus.
Please do it as a full Italian.
Why are you giving me so much money to suck other deep?
Is my apusie if I'm ain't a mommy?
I could see myself going to Italy and then like going to a pizza shop.
I'm like, yo, what's this sauce?
It's a malimony.
It's a mapus sauce.
It's a map.
All this talk about alimony and child support, man.
Shout out to all the poor people watching at home, man.
Shout out to all the poor people watching at home, who just worked out there at the moment.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
All right, what y'all think about Jeff Bezos?
Did you hear about this shit?
The boat?
The boat.
Yeah.
The boat is actually quite interesting because he's being positioned like he's this, you know, like bond villain.
He is basically, to put it in perspective, he had this.
Basically, the headline is like, Jeff Bezos is having a bridge deconstructed to move his boat through.
Historic bridge.
Historic bridge, right?
Yeah, new bridge is getting no love.
Yeah.
Don't be like a 2000 bridge, fucking pronouns and shit.
Real talk.
You having a bridge getting deconstructed.
Yeah, basically, so that the boat can pass through, right?
And I saw the headline of the story and I'm like, man, this shit sounds super fishy.
Because one, why would anybody be on a fucking yacht in the Netherlands in February?
Like, that's just not yacht weather.
And then I found out that the company that's building the yacht is in the Netherlands.
They agreed to build it.
You know exactly how big that fucking yacht was supposed to be.
And you knew that it wasn't going to pass through that bridge.
So then he said, I'll pay for the bridge to be taken down and be put back up.
The guy's paying $450 million for the boat, plus, I'm sure, millions to take down the bridge and put it back up.
How is anybody angry at this?
The thing is, they've deconstructed the bridge like three or four times in the past.
See, these motherfuckers.
All these old D, that's the shit that they do.
So if they've been doing it, I think they made a declaration around 2018.
They're like, we'll never do it again or some shit like that.
All these super yachts are made in the Netherlands.
Like the whole town gets employed from it.
He's injecting half a billion dollars into the economy.
By the way, that historic bridge, I'm sure when they rebuild it, it's probably safer than it was.
100%.
And they probably let the Nazis use that shit.
I don't know.
Fuck that bridge.
Probably fucking Nazis on that bridge.
The Freedom Convoy passing through the ship.
That's also that.
Well, wait a minute.
I think we're making different arguments.
No, but for real, that's the bridge.
Tom Hanks was shooting his pistol at them.
You don't remember that?
What's that reason?
Same private Ryan, bro.
That was the last shot in Savior Private Ryan.
I was drinking beer.
That was the last shot.
I don't know why I believe that shit.
You're Chris Hansen, but for Muslims, bro.
Why do we care about that shit?
Well, because it was the outrage.
We hate rich motherfuckers.
That's what it is.
They use their wealth.
You don't really get that use their wells and try to throw it around to bully little people and governments.
Who is he bullying?
That's 100%.
People that can't use the bridge and they're touching something historically.
All they're employed by it.
No, I know you know this, but like we make it look like he's he's uh actually, you know what?
This is just white people being inconvenienced.
Yep.
This is white Karen's, bro.
This is just Karen's being Karen's, bro.
Yo, your bridge is down.
Figure it out, bitch.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Just get them.
You can't swim.
Do we even know if the Dutch people were even mad or it was someone else that heard the story?
This is Americans for some.
This is us.
Oh, my God.
What are you doing?
Oh, my God.
Who does that?
You're American.
Seriously?
Yeah, no.
Like, shut up.
Shut your whoremouth.
Why are we so upset?
Yo, shut your whoremouth.
That's great, bro.
I knew that recorded.
Anytime your girl asks for alimony, bro, shut your whore mouth.
No, you have to roll the H. Shut your whore mouth.
Whore mouth.
I will say, though, I remember seeing the headline and I saw the picture of like Jeff on a yacht.
He's like in the shorts with his girl.
I didn't really care about the story, but I just thought, like, do rich niggas take steroids?
Yes.
Yeah.
They don't try to live for it.
I'm like, how do you bald?
The good ones.
And you're doing it like multi-billionaire.
There's good stuff that don't make it.
They take the peptides that they inject, the NAD.
They're biohacking.
Sleeping in a hyperbaric chamber.
He probably has a still red company.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's looking yoke.
So I'm not only going to take that shit, I'm going to make profit off of that.
100%.
I just think there's something weird about that.
Like, you're super rich and you're managing these big companies and you got time to stay in like super great shape.
That's no way.
It's not even staying great shape.
They want to live forever.
Yeah.
Because if you're that rich and life is that good, wouldn't you want to stretch that shit out?
Okay.
Bezos says it's go to space too.
Ooh, so you got to be in decent shape to go to space.
Real time.
I just assume like once you get past a certain income bracket, like you just become a lizard man.
And then from there, everything is easy sailing.
Yeah.
What do you mean, a lizard man?
Yeah, you don't know about like the lizards?
Are we going red pill?
No, the reptilians.
Oh, my God.
What are the reptile people?
No, it's off to me.
You never seen the picture of the queen with like the scale on her face.
That shit tripped me out for days.
But do you really believe that the elites are reptiles?
I don't give a shit.
You believe it a little bit.
I'm not holding front.
I don't really fuck with conspiracies too much.
Son, this is.
Here we go.
Here we go.
What's up?
What the hell?
You believe that they're reptiles, baby.
I mean, how does she live this long?
She's really new.
She's all about money.
Yeah.
I thought dead people.
Bro, how long do you think lizards live?
She's die all the time.
Hold up.
Hold up.
Lizards, not the one that go back into an egg and then come back out.
The fucking shit.
What are you talking about, bro?
Am I wrong about that?
Yeah, no, man.
That motherfucker's a nerd.
He's on something.
What goes back into an egg?
You said twice people fucked up.
I was high when I was watching Discovery Cameron.
Dungeon and Dragon shit.
No, that's some.
My bad, guys.
That's Pokemon shit.
Fucking nerd.
I just think when you get that rich, hey, man, I might go fry it.
I say nothing wrong.
It might have.
See, I was thinking about it.
You said what we were thinking.
Dude, I didn't.
Fucking rude.
I'm sorry about that.
Shit, some time I got it.
I might have fucked that one up.
I'll do the whole story in the nerd.
Go back into an egg.
Well, hold up.
When you guys hear about like the Rothish child, you don't think these motherfuckers are immortal?
No.
No.
Immortal.
Have you guys ever seen?
I'm not into conspiracy.
I don't know.
I'm not into conspiracies.
I'm not racist, but it's some wild shit that's going to follow, bro.
And let me tell you something.
When somebody says I'm not in conspiracies, my ears perk up.
My eyes cross over.
I'm a lizard.
This motherfucker talk about going back into a national.
Give me some conspiracy because I know you're all on YouTube.
Let's go.
I'm not that deep into it.
The one that you looked into the Fed?
No, I don't know about that.
What are we talking about?
Because y'all don't got a Fed going back into an egg, bro.
You're not.
No, that's a little crazy.
No, no, I thought lizards, that's like their life, but it doesn't matter, man.
We're going to get off this one.
I'm going to go crazy.
Yeah, you feel like you're going to be a little bit crazy.
Shout out to the king.
Shout out to the king.
I'd show him some love.
God damn.
Alex Jones.
Yeah.
That's why I feel like if Rogan just makes a couple more hundred million, it's good.
What?
He can turn into a lizard?
Like, okay.
My assumption was this.
I feel like once everybody makes a billion, they just change, like personality-wise.
Into a lizard.
At least that's how it appears online.
So I just figured they get a membership kind of thing.
Ah, to the club.
Yeah, you get an invitation.
Okay, here.
Here's the thought process, right?
Yeah.
If I'm from another place in the galaxy, or like universe.
Yeah.
And I want to take over Earth.
Yeah.
Right?
The easiest ways to co-opt the super rich.
You feel me?
Yeah.
And what do you promise them?
Eternal life.
Oh, oh, I like this.
Right?
Right?
But, anyways.
What if it's While we're on this, give us some feelings, no facts, so we can really like this is a perfect inspiration for feelings, no facts.
Mark, hit us with some feelings, no facts because we're on it right now.
Remember, we're going red pill, feelings, no facts.
Okay, feelings, no facts at all, okay?
No facts.
Any facts, just feelings.
All right, so there was a girl that claimed that she was raped in the metaverse.
Jesus Christ.
What?
You just said feelings, bro.
Jesus.
You just said feelings.
Gang rapes.
Not just rapes.
Multiple.
No facts.
Jesus.
Next story.
To try to cancel motherfuckers.
Goddamn.
Next story.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
So, wait, there's this Netflix documentary called The Tinder Swindler.
Ah, yes.
We were talking about this earlier.
That's my dude.
Okay.
I don't know anything about it.
Okay.
No, basically, this guy went on Tinder and defrauded women that he met.
He's out there in Europe.
Thousands, hundreds of thousands.
Millions?
Millions.
Yo, so here's what's interesting.
Just in context.
So it's basically this Netflix documentary tab right now.
Of course, none of us have seen it, but we're going to talk about it.
And basically, what he did is he's a dude in Europe and he was basically dating these girls and getting like borrowing money from these girls to just ball out for other girls.
So he had like a Bernie Madoff little situation going where he's just taking from this girl and then taking private jets for that girl and just keep running it.
What I think is so funny about it is when there's a story of a man who takes advantage of women and uses them for their money, it gets a documentary.
Like that is how shocking this is.
Same thing that Netflix is like, we need to print this story and let everybody know who this is.
When you could make the argument that this is a common practice out there in the world for some ladies to gold dig on rich dudes.
He's just having this city girl moment.
I'm not mad at him.
No, we call that life.
It's just like it's just that's the dude?
No, no.
I'm going to say this.
So this is an old story.
This happened like 2015.
So I was on YouTube watching like videos about this.
And the funny thing that had me rolling was these women who were like, I was convinced he was a rich man.
So I just gave him $50,000.
He took me on a yacht.
They took me on a plane.
So I trust the wording of that shit.
I was convinced he was a rich man.
Right.
And he's like, he hit me up one day and he's like, listen, I'm having issues with my credit card.
If you can just front me the money, I'll be down to pick you up in my jet next week.
But I just need to pause it.
And the girl's like, I had no reason not to believe him.
He was so charming and elegant.
The facade he put on, the clothes he wears, the hotel, the limousines he used, the scam was genius.
But it's just something funny about these girls thinking they found themselves a big fish and they're like, I'm settled for life.
And then carpet came out underneath them.
The look on their face when they found out crazy.
Beautiful.
Wow.
Beautiful.
Because you never hear about it.
So it's just kind of like it's a nice change of pace.
You feel me?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I enjoyed it.
It's a change of pace.
It's just crazy that he did to me what I wanted to do to him.
I'm like, shut up.
Shut your whore mouth.
But yeah, this guy's a master swindler.
He did stuff in Israel, went to jail for it.
And then after he got out, went to Europe, started defrauding all these women.
His commitment to the game is what I'm impressed by.
I mean, you have to understand.
He's rolling with high stakes.
And if you're pulling it off in Israel that he was doing it and got caught, it's like that's the NBA.
And then he's going to Finland.
And then you pick up games at the sixth grade basketball court at that point.
Easy.
It's easy.
Easy.
That's funny.
Shout out to him.
What's the guy's name?
Do we know?
His men.
Oh, that's right.
He's men.
Simon Leviv was like the main name that they use in the documentary, but his name's Shimone Juliet.
Yeah, some last name I can't pronounce.
Some shit like that.
And did you watch the documentary?
Yeah, last night.
Was it crazy?
I put it at 1.5 speed because it was so good that I was like, I need to know what happens.
It's so good.
Yeah.
Did they show the girls?
Were they hot?
Yeah.
There's three girls that they show.
They were hot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
They're also, they were like mid-30s, like they were professionals.
Like mid-30s.
So that was like seven years ago.
So, you know, white women age like bread, so they don't look good now.
I interviewed them.
Yeah, but what type of bread?
We're hot.
Yeah.
What type of bread?
You ever seen a McDonald's?
Yeah.
Wonderbread?
All right, fair enough.
Wonder bread, I think age is good.
That shit stays looking like Wonder Bread forever.
Does it?
Yeah.
No, Wonder Bread be getting fucking rotten, bro.
Nah, it just dries out.
It's all processed.
You're just used to Wonder Bread.
Shit.
Yeah, those women were smoking.
Like, you watched old videos of them, they were hot.
For real?
He had to go for women who are about to hit their peak and like Peter out because they had money in the bank.
He couldn't go for 20-year-olds.
So he's picking young, like professionals that were established, had good careers.
Very smart.
Because you saw the way those women dressed.
They were dressing classy, right?
They asked for it.
Is that what you're saying?
They were asking for it dressing like that.
It's not the metaverse, bro.
No, sorry, dude.
Oh, sorry, dude.
My bad.
Imagine being in the metaverse and being raped by a dude who sounds like fucking.
Can you imagine staying there for the other guys?
Just take off the fucking oculus.
Right?
I'm out going front.
I'm ready for like virtual reality sex.
What do you mean?
I mean, I've tried virtual reality stuff and I'm like, I wouldn't mind.
Because, you know, they're already doing surgeries where some motherfucker puts his hand in a glove and he's in like United States and there's somebody in like India who needs a heart transplant and the surgeon's doing it remotely.
Shit, I didn't know that I was like, so imagine there's just some girl in fucking Ukraine and you're like, you want a hands off from her?
She puts her hand in a glove.
You put your shit in the pocket pussy.
You feel me?
Virtual Reality Rape Scenarios00:05:33
Yeah.
All right, man.
Y'all look at it.
Yeah, no, no, let him go.
Let him go.
This is good.
I like when you're getting passionate about your things.
I'm just saying.
Wouldn't that be crazy?
Like, you can do long distance.
It would change long distance forever.
Yeah.
You can't fuck a girl, but you can.
Yeah.
And you can give her bigger titties.
You can like update that shit.
But here's the thing: how do you know that it's a girl?
Exactly.
And how do you not know that it's just preach fucking around with you in the next room?
I would.
Like, I bet this dude would let me jerk his ass off.
This dumb motherfucker.
Hey, Don't put metaverse moves in my oculus.
I can't.
Hey, hey, hey.
You just fuck up and actually speak in your voice.
He's just like, shut your whoremouth, preach.
And I'm like, it's not preaching.
And then it's like, update, update.
Open your whore mouth.
No, that virtual reality sex is going to be crazy because a lot of dudes are going to give catfish and they're not going to care.
No, they're not.
And that's the thing that's going to be interesting.
Like, that's what I'm curious about the metaverse.
Do we really start?
All right.
Do we really start letting people identify however they want to identify when you're getting head from some fine girl?
Right?
It actually is a dude in Albuquerque, right?
But his avatar is super fine.
Right.
Are you going to go, well, that he identifies as that?
I got head from a girl.
Right.
Right.
Now, do we accept people identifying whoever they want?
When it benefits us, when we're getting our dicks up from the people we want, yeah.
That's that's the key.
That's the way.
That's the way.
I feel that way about trans people.
Like, if you didn't know and you busted, like, what's the issue?
Yeah.
Don't ask, don't tell, right?
So we have to ask.
Stop talking.
Wait a couple of years.
Is that what your message is?
Wait a couple of years and you're going to be good.
All right.
So wait.
So I mean, I had this whole joke about that.
It's like, there's no issue once they're hot.
It is true.
People are going to go for it, bro.
Yo, you don't want a newly scooped out pussy, bro?
Bro, you ever see all of those businesses?
You want a newly scooped out, bro?
Come on, dog.
You telling me you don't want that new shit?
We could move right along with the next one.
I'm just saying, bro, that you got you could buy some old house.
Yeah, you know, have you seen images of a new development?
They gotta do a pin my ride before training.
That's it.
Yeah, whatever you want, aquarium in that?
Yeah, exactly, bro.
Yeah, I like my pussy like my steak, aged for 18 years.
That's how I want it.
Just 18.
That's the cheap one.
Jess ain't cheating, bro.
He's just waiting there to try to get me out of here.
He could have said any of that, bro.
He could have said any 30, 25.
He'd be waiting at the steak store like 17, 17, 17.
I went on a date with a young woman the other day, and I don't know what happened, but like we're hitting 31, but it's like, how old?
22.
Okay.
You went out with a 23-year-old?
Yeah.
No.
I don't know if you had this happen, but like when you started trying to hang around, because age doesn't hit you until you get a like, oh, I'm old moment.
You feel me?
Yeah.
So I'm like, sitting down, she's talking.
Like, there's something about young people.
They just talk with so much certainty about shit they know nothing about.
What did you want to tell me?
And then he's like, bitch, you've not been through.
What did you want to tell her?
Say it.
I didn't say nothing.
I was just like, I wanted to say, shut up.
You know what I mean?
Like, shut your whore ass.
But she was like trying to school me on politics and geopolitics and understanding the Afghanistan.
What was she saying?
She didn't know what she was talking about.
How do you know?
I know because I know less.
I know more a little bit more than her, but I also know I don't know enough.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, one thing that age has taught me, and especially being around some of these issues, I don't know nothing.
Yeah.
Right?
If I'm just talking like, yeah, yeah, that's what.
But when you're young, you just don't know.
So like they just be yapping and yapping, yapping, and they think it's insightful.
It's like I'm past the age where listening to this is worth the pussy.
Yeah, You fuck?
Nah.
He's like, you so fucked it up.
Let's get to the good part.
You know, she wouldn't throw you no pussy.
Once a girl don't want to fuck you, like, why is she talking about Afghanistan?
Right?
Like, if a girl's willing to fuck, you be listening to that shit.
Yeah, we got to stop that.
And the poppy.
And it's horrible.
The geopolitics.
You're just nodding your way into some pussy, bro.
That's what happens when you get older.
The pussy don't mean as much.
It don't.
It don't mean as much.
But I sidetracked this.
Oh, my bad.
No, no, no.
This is important.
I want you to get this out.
Oh, I got it.
That's just young women just gross me out, man.
That's good.
Like, I know they be saying, like, yo, 18, 18, 18.
And, like, they look good.
Don't get me wrong.
Like, but then you got to sit down and like talk.
Yeah.
That's when they talk.
Yeah.
I just can't bear with it.
So that's why I'm always impressed by other dudes' like endurance.
Oh, to put up with that?
Yeah.
Dove can put up with the best.
This guy's ability to change his IQ for the girl he's talking to is unbelievable, dude.
I've seen it happen in real time.
I've seen him like approach at like a, you know, moderate to high IQ.
Dove's a smart guy.
You know, he's a very smart guy.
And like, I've seen him approach moderate to high and then reduce like 30 fucking IQ points to like smells.
Right.
Like, it's just like, we're just talking about smells.
And it's just like, oh, is that your perfume?
And then she's like, yeah, how'd you guess?
And he's like, oh, I know this one.
And she's like, oh, yeah, I like that one.
And it's literally just like, why does he speak like that?
Five senses, bro.
He just goes to the five senses: touch, smell, see, right?
Black History TikTok Identity00:15:07
You're like, what's your favorite?
You know, you like colors or whatever.
And then, yeah, I don't like colors.
Yeah.
Very basic.
Good.
Food is good.
Yeah, hold up, Doug.
What do you do when they want to show you TikTok videos?
Nah, that's just fire.
I do that all day.
They're like, I look at this latest dance.
I'm like, oh, my.
You know what I do?
Let them show you, bro.
I show them Schultz's 28 million on TikTok.
Like, oh, yeah, we're on the TikTok too.
Run by 19-year-old Shifty.
Shots of Shifty, bro.
Shifty does our TikTok.
Shouts to Shifty.
He's killing that shit.
You comment every once in a while.
Actually, no, I don't even think I'm signed into my TikTok.
If I'm being honest, don't ruin it for the fans.
Cut that shit out.
Hey, you guys, it is what it is.
Enjoy the content.
Okay, give us another one.
All right, they asked T-Pain what he thought about Black History Month.
Okay.
And this is what he had to say.
All right, actually, the question is more specific.
He said, How should white people celebrate Black History Month?
Any insight, all right, for how white people can properly celebrate Black History Month the right way?
Stop celebrating.
I don't think we should celebrate Black History Month.
I think we should just have history.
I don't think it's out with the oversight.
We don't want our own shit.
You're separating us again.
We want to be part of history, not just one month of it.
So, yeah, that's what he said.
I don't think we should celebrate Black History Month.
It should just be history.
Damn, I didn't know Payne had an opinion on that.
What do you think?
What do you think, Al?
He sounds like me with that steak line just before.
He thought it was good.
And then it's like, fuck.
Yeah, I think my experience and preacher's experience, especially mine, I grew up a large part of my life in Ethiopia.
So even identifying as black was a bit of a weird thing because I just identified as like Ethiopian, right?
My blackness was never really something I considered because I was everybody's norm.
So it wasn't until I immigrated to North America that I understood what the color of my skin meant within a greater context of a society.
So I think then I became more sensitive to like, okay, that's why black folks have this initiative or they have this going on.
Like I understand the need for something like this.
So I don't get too mad at it.
I think for me, it's like, I've heard this rhetoric.
It's nothing new.
We hear this like every year, pretty much.
My personal take on it is like, if black folks aren't bothered, if I can't see any net negative, then I'm cool with it.
I don't know why it's like a, I don't know why people get so up in arms of being bothered by you could teach it every year.
It's like, yeah, you can teach it every year.
And you could also highlight it this year and this specific month.
Doesn't mean you have to stop learning about it later on.
So that's my thoughts on it.
I mean, if it can just prevent people to be in my position where I'm in a whole, I'm in the, sorry, I'm in the all-white elementary school.
And then they talk about slavery.
And everybody turns around.
I'm the only black kid in the fucking room.
It's like, they're not talking about history.
They're talking about me.
Ah.
Is that what happened, bitch?
I don't know.
I wasn't there.
Yeah.
It's like, so if they can have a month, whenever they talk about black history or black people, I always talk about, they always talk about slavery.
Can we talk about other people and everything else?
Like the before, like, if it can prevent that from happening, not just the tragic month.
Not just the tragic.
It's just like, it's the same thing with movies.
Oh, that's a good movie.
What's that movie about?
You know, slaves?
Yeah, you can't get it.
Exactly.
I don't want to.
Yeah, so if we could highlight the good, that's cool because we don't get highlighted.
That's pretty much it.
As a comic, you know what it is?
Corny, though.
Every time Black History Month, I get be putting on all kinds of lineups.
It's Christmas.
Yo, if you want to make some extra money, it's kind of cool.
But like, I be getting booked on all kinds of crazy shows.
I'm like, but it's this month again.
And the same venue.
My paycheck all of a sudden look a little bit different.
And the same venues a couple months before, like, oh, we already have a black comic book.
Yeah, you know what's weird about that, especially with comedy, is like, yeah, February, you get all the shine you want.
But I remember, like, I don't know, like, comedy is weird because I asked comedy clubs, like, yeah, why is the lineup like this?
And I've heard so many club owners say, like, I don't want to have more than one black comic on the lineup.
They've just said that.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's just in Canada.
No, you know what we're talking about?
How did I tell you, whatever we had here, they have had here as well, maybe just a couple years back.
But I've heard that.
I've heard that enough times.
And even speak to older comics, they'd hear stuff like that.
But I never heard that in French comedy, though.
Because they don't want to turn into an ethnic night.
In English comedy, I heard that.
But in French comedy, I don't hear that.
Interesting.
What I heard, though, is like, oh, yeah, maybe some people don't get accepted in comedy school, which is a concept that they have in Quebec.
And, oh, your thing is too ethnic.
But that happened to one of my buddies.
But other than that, yeah.
Wow, that's interesting.
They're just so blatantly honest about it.
I mean, I'm sure it's the same thing here in the States for some lives.
I think that they would do it, but they just wouldn't say it like that.
There's almost a comfort in saying it like that because now you know it's not your comedy that's fucked up.
It's their racism.
Yeah.
Whereas before that, they'll just be like, sorry, you're not funny enough.
And now you got to walk around going, but I'm funnier than these motherfuckers.
Why are they saying I'm not funny enough?
It's the same outcome, but at least you know it's not something you could control.
I noticed what rich people get comfortable.
Yeah.
They start talking crazy.
Like, really?
Yeah, because if they really feel like nothing can affect them, they'll just say what they think.
And they might have some crazy thoughts.
Like, how many of those NFL orders, amongst other NFL owners, say the wildest things about athletes?
Right?
Like, you remember that prison comment that that one NFL owner said?
He said, we have the inmates running the asylum or whatever.
Yeah.
And that sounds crazy.
Imagine what they're saying when you nod around with the newspapers, when they're just talking to staff.
That's why when these NFL coaches come out and they say, oh, this owner said this, or this owner said that, or they told me, like, yeah, I don't want too many black players.
I want to bounce.
I believe it.
Yeah, I don't think a coach has ever said, I don't want too many black players.
No, no, no.
I don't think that's ever happened in the history of integrated.
I bet you, though, before the integration of black players became super common, there's definitely coaches or owners who would have liked to see a lot of white FL players.
Oh, I mean, before it was the winning ticket to get black folks, Utah Jazz has still got white people.
And it's like, I think that there's by design here, right?
It's like the only team that's got multiple white people, right?
Yeah.
So something's going on.
We've always had that.
We've got to have the same thing.
The least jazzy team.
The least jazzy team.
And for the Canadians, you kind of have that same thing where they absolutely want the coach to speak French.
Which has nothing to do with the fucking game.
But they absolutely want the fucking coach to be, yeah, but he's French.
He's not a Quebecer.
He's not.
They're really adamant about that.
That language shit is weird.
So they'd rather have a shittier coach.
Yeah, but he speaks French.
But he speaks French.
Super players too, right?
Like, they want all the players to be half.
Same time.
See, I don't respect that.
Because he's just not competitive enough.
Like, let's win.
You should want to win.
Identity is more important than winning.
Because for them, maintaining their identity is a win.
I'm serious.
Dead ass.
Yeah.
How about this?
How many times you heard someone say, I don't care how much money my kid's partner makes.
I just want them to be the same culture.
For them, the identity is more important than the quality of the partner.
In Quebec, you're Quebec first, Canada second.
100%.
100%.
Akash will sit here and tell you, right?
Like, he had to get a brown girl.
And his parents probably wanted that for him.
He could have got, like, hyperthropic.
I don't know his wife.
I'm not saying anything like that.
But let's say if there was a woman that much kinder, much better, whatever.
Yeah.
His parents still would have wanted him to go with the brown girl because identity matters more.
Interesting.
Yeah.
It's like that.
Identity or culture?
That's just a form of identity.
Different identity, which your race, your culture, your income status, whatever it is.
Those are just different forms of identity.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I guess that makes sense.
Shit.
Well, here's okay.
Feelings, no facts.
Maybe we talk about Aquafina then.
Yeah.
So like Aquafina is this actress.
You've seen her in Shang-Chi and a bunch of other movies, Crazy Rich Asians.
And she keeps on getting criticized for using a black scent.
She's an Asian actress.
She's half Korean, half Chinese.
Friend of mine.
We did, you know, back in the day, Girl Code, I think it was together.
And she just keeps on getting criticized for using this black scent.
And, well, first of all, what do you guys think about it?
Is it her accent?
So here's the thing: when you're from New York, she's from New York, she's from Queens.
So it's like, like, who you know, yo, but yo, the and see, that's the thing that maybe you guys understand as like uh Canadians, but like black people that are from Canada, because like you guys have an accent from your part of Canada, yeah, I understand.
Like, y'all sound like you're from Quebec, okay.
It's different than when you're from Toronto, and the Toronto accent just popped up like a year ago.
Like, these motherfuckers sound like they were from New York five years ago, and now all of a sudden, ting, ting, ting, everything is ting, ting, right?
Like, your waist man, waist.
And I get it.
You heard the Fedora for two.
They've been saying that.
Yeah, but no carry mainstream.
Nobody been in that thing.
Because I hate Toronto, so keep going.
I love Toronto.
I love Toronto, but it feels like they're adopting an identity.
Like, if you listen to Tori Lane's talk, he talks he's from New York.
What do you say, my guy?
Every once in a while, you see.
So, but I think that they're adopting identity that are from the influential cultures that are in the city, right?
And that's what we all do, right?
So, if you grew up in New York, yes, you're going to code switch.
I'm going to speak one way around my parents and one way around my friends.
And I think that we all do that.
The crazy thing about her and why I always defend her is it's like, what accent you want her to have, yo?
She got to have an Asian accent.
Is that what you want?
Or she got to talk white.
What you're basically saying is, hey, you got to talk white.
And the reality is she grew up in Queens, maybe grew up with more black folk than she did white folk.
And that's going to be the people that influence her accent the most.
Right?
100%.
She grew up in Queens.
Bruh, I know.
She's around.
I tell her this all the time.
I'm like, yo, that's yours.
You're a product of this city.
Don't let anybody tell you how you can or can't talk.
Now, here's the thing.
I do understand the frustration.
And we were talking to our boy Derek Poston who opens up on the road for us.
And he was bringing up this point.
I understand the frustration of black people where he's like, yo, if I quote unquote black scented up, I'm scary or dangerous to people.
When other cultures lean in, it's endearing or funny.
It's funny that this Asian girl has a blacker quote unquote, but we would call this a New York accent.
But if you're not from New York, it's a black accent.
Like that is all of a sudden comical, right?
So it's like, I understand that frustration.
If you're black, you're going, yo, why would I do this shit?
It's fucked up and dangerous.
And when this Asian girl does it, it's hilarious.
Yeah, but that's just comedy's weird like that.
Yeah.
It's not, it's not precise.
But besides that, yeah, she's from Queens.
It's like that.
People, it's not Asian people that speak like that.
It's people from Queens that speak like that.
Yeah.
I mean, Will Vicki get the same treatment?
Will Nikki?
Well, Vicki.
Woo Vicki.
Well, Nikki.
Yeah, whatever.
Where is she from?
I'm pretty sure she's from like Houston or some shit, but that's her accent, right?
From what I know.
So my thing is this.
I might be a little cow.
Yeah, I don't know.
I'm pretty sure that's her accent.
But the main thing I was going to say is I think it just comes down to the context.
I understand the struggle.
I understand where the hurt comes from, whether it be with the braids and the box braids and everyone switching up the names of the hairstyles because the white girl put on.
I get that.
Yeah.
But we can't throw away context because you feel that outreach.
You got to understand like there's an individual on the other side of that that you don't know that you are accrediting to a group think or a group idea, which is the same issue that you have being dealt to you.
You get what I'm saying?
You're being marginalized.
You're being pigeonholed when you speak a certain way.
Now you're making it.
And you're pigeonholing someone else, removing their identity.
Yeah, yeah.
Their individualism, right?
Or the place that they grew up in or all that, and just putting them in the people who are like appropriating your culture.
No, that's her culture.
Yeah.
Right.
So you can't just meet with that.
And again, that comes back to the Rogan thing earlier, where it's like people don't want to take the time to go beyond the two-minute clip that they saw or anything like that to do a simple Google church to learn about folks.
They don't have the energy.
Yeah, they just saw her, they heard her speak, and they went, She's part of that.
I think the solution is not punishing someone for like you know, being a part of it, it should be trying to create a more accepting society that doesn't feel uncomfortable when black people talk black.
Yes, you know what I mean?
Yeah, like it's the same thing with like cornrows.
Like when a black woman wears cornrows in the workplace, it's unprofessional, she can't wear hair like that.
When David Beckham does it, wow, look how cool this guy is.
Yeah, I don't think we should punish David Beckham for wearing cornrows.
I think we should accept black women when they wear cornrows.
And I understand black people's frustration with that.
But it's easier to punish one person than to try to make a whole society change.
That's true.
That's true.
So you're taking out that frustration on that one person.
They become the figurehead for your frustration.
I'm going to make you feel how all how society made me feel.
Made me feel.
Yeah.
I don't know how it was.
And that's a human interaction.
Sorry to cut you.
That's okay.
That's just like this knee-jerk thing that we do.
And we cannot be proud of our behavior.
We can do fucked up things and recognize it.
But I do understand the impulse to be critical.
You're like, you're just like, what the fuck?
I've been doing this shit and it's a problem.
They do it and it's celebrated.
But I like what you guys are saying.
At least you have the context to go, like, that's where she's from.
That's how the fuck she talks.
Because if she spoke in an Asian accent, nobody would be upset about it, even though it wouldn't be natural for her.
Right?
Nobody would say a single fucking thing.
Because she's conforming to our idea of what it should be rather than 100% kind of which that's fucked up.
That is fucked up.
That is fucked up that we know you should speak like that.
I don't want to be that guy, but I'm like, aren't you going to do the same thing?
Yeah.
How about this?
A black person grows up in the suburbs, speaks, doesn't speak like they're from the hood.
They get on television, speak the same way.
Everyone starts looking at them for everything.
Why are you trying to be white?
No, it's the environment that most of you are.
It would be weird if I hear some guy who grew up in a gated community.
It's like when I hear these rappers who grew up in gated communities talk about, oh, I'm shooting through keypads and all this stuff.
Nigga, you live behind a gate.
Like, why you talk about thug life?
That's not you.
That's inauthentic.
That's the issue.
But you being true to yourself and talking about stuff that's real for you.
Now you're being white.
So it's like, but I get this.
Yeah.
I get that all the time because in French, I don't know how Aqua Final got brought up and anything and stuff.
My parents came here and they understood what having an accent and what not bothering people.
And so my parent, I was not allowed to speak Creole with my parents.
I was allowed to speak Creole with my aunts and my mom, my aunt, extended family, but with your parents.
But no, it was French.
Because they wanted you to be nice.
No, because they understood that the importance of having a good French.
Right.
And when I step on, when I step an interview sometimes and I speak French with the interview, which is a French Quebecer, I speak Quebecer, which is different types of French with its accent.
La accentuated.
Proper New Yorker Accents00:03:10
What I said was the accent is going to be different.
It's not going to be like an accent from France.
My black followers are like, why are you trying to be white?
I grew up like that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
If I went to school and speak with a Creole accent, I would get beat.
If I go back home and I speak with a Quebecer accent, not a proper accent, proper, quote unquote, I would get beat.
So I cultivate all the time.
Like, that's what I do.
It's also, it's not because you have different accent.
It's also part of who I am.
It's part of who we all are.
Yeah.
Any highly intelligent social individual is going to have these different codes that they can speak with, right?
If you're speaking one specific way, you go talk to your priest, you're going to do the exact same thing as you talk to your friends.
No, you're going to change certain words and you're going to change certain tones, all that kind of stuff.
But your mom is from my mom's from Scotland.
When she's with her family, that Scottish accent pops out.
And you're not, it don't pop out.
She's just being fake.
Yeah, she's a fake.
You're not New York.
You're not 50%, 50%.
You're 100%.
And that's all you are.
Like, I can also be all that and all that.
She can be Asian, wherever the hell she's from, and also from Queens and be part of that.
And that makes who she is.
But the thing is, people want a clear distinction of what they are.
You're like that.
You're that.
Satisfy my feelings.
Yes.
You should satisfy my feelings.
It's selfish.
And I don't understand how you, then it's fake.
It's not like that.
It's not exactly like that, but whatever.
Again, I think it goes back to the whole thing.
We're trying to cope with this influx of information, these new faces, these new people, and we don't have enough time to see them as individuals.
So we place them in groups so we can understand them.
Yeah.
I think a lot of these issues.
Thinking's hard, bro.
Whether it's like misinformation, all this stuff is just a reflection of like the new technologies that we're absorbing that our brains and our, like, we're not meant to see millions of people.
We're not meant to scroll and see a different person.
Our brains have a hard time internalizing all this stuff.
And so we're having like these malfunctions where we're having almost like inhuman responses to other human beings, but it's impossible to be empathetic, to be kind, to be understanding with millions of people that you're seeing all the time.
So you have to be able to do that.
I think that's all that shit.
Yeah.
Put it in a box.
Exactly.
To make it quick for you to process.
Exactly.
An Asian, you have to speak.
What?
Why did you?
Yeah.
Here's an example.
Here's an example.
I'm walking down the street.
This is how I do something to do.
Like, you see somebody, they look threatening.
You're just going to assume that about them.
You're going to profile them, right?
You're going to act accordingly, right?
If I see a bald white dude with like tattoos and I think he's a skinhead, I'm going to just move accordingly, right?
Is that who you were imagining?
Yes.
Yeah, that's what scares me.
Me too.
Me too.
Yeah, yeah.
Freedom combo is coming through.
So you do that, but you have to imagine we aren't built for that because if you go back a long time, you had your village, you had your neighborhood.
Yes.
You knew everybody there.
It wasn't normal to walk across somebody who looked threatening because you knew everybody.
And if they weren't there, everybody's like, yo, who's that walking through our street?
So we have to also acknowledge that everything has changed so fast and we haven't adapted.
Exactly.
Exactly.
White people are good.
Cuban Sandwich Threats00:03:00
Can I ask you one question?
Yes.
Miles go.
What if someone takes a New York accent?
What if they don't have it?
Happens.
I have a prime example.
Who's that?
Canada's most handsome man, Ryan Gosling, has an European.
Yeah.
New Yorker.
Not New Yorker.
He's Canadian.
He grew up wanting a tougher accent.
So he started copying Marlon Brando as a kid.
How do you feel?
Now, is he still in your culture?
No, that is different.
He's appropriate.
But if you're someone who lives in New York for an extended period of time, you're just going to speak like us.
It's just what it is.
It's like, how many years?
Not only is it cool.
Yo, I bet you if we were in the South, if I lived in the South for fucking three, I'm going to start having Southern accent.
Dude, when we were in Miami, I bet I started saying, bro, more.
Yeah, bro.
You were Cuban for a while.
I am a Cuban.
I am Cuban.
I am a Cuban, dude.
How many Cuban did you eat?
I overrated.
I've got one fucking Cuban.
I don't do that shit, dude.
Uh-uh.
I get you.
That sandwich is poor.
Everything about that sandwich is.
It should be wrapped in plastic.
That is a poor fucking sandwich.
They brought their communism food.
Yeah, they're not allowed to do that.
Leave that back home.
Leave it, bro.
Nobody trying to eat that.
Uh-uh.
It's ham and pork.
Yeah.
Yeah, double up.
Yeah.
It's like, what's going on, dude?
Yeah, yeah.
But you know, if you understand the food situation in Cuba, you can't be too mad at them.
It's the best they could do.
Yeah, but they're here now.
Bro, Cuban food is fire.
What are you talking about?
Cuban food is just nah.
All Caribbean food is mad.
Have you been to Cuban?
The only Caribbean food that's good is Jamaican.
Low-key.
Sure, say that.
Only Caribbean machines is Jamaican.
Get the machine.
Only Caribbean food that's good is Jamaican.
Get the fuck out of here.
What is Haitian food?
What is Haitian food?
You don't even know what the fuck it is.
You're going to.
That's your fault.
Yeah, talk that shit.
My fault.
Step it up.
Step out.
There's Haitians all over this bitch.
You don't want me to make you want.
What the fuck?
Whoever said, yo, let's go to Haitian food tonight.
What the fuck?
Name a Haitian restaurant.
Mini Meru.
Shout out to you guys in my life.
Yo, Se Passe.
I don't eat that shit.
Well, I'm from New York.
I don't eat that shit in New York.
Say it again.
Now, you don't eat that shit in New York.
You don't eat that shit.
You don't eat that shit.
Check out name a dish.
You're from New York.
Name a Haitian dish.
Seus eats that shit.
Seuss more meat.
This guy's crazy, bro.
I know.
I got Laura's.
I got fired out.
I got fired.
Shout out.
That's a face.
It's French.
No, it's not, bro.
Fuck your life.
I got excited, bro.
I will say on the Ryan Gosling shit, though, like, when you come from certain backgrounds, you learn that assimilating is part of surviving.
Or like adapting, right?
Richard Pryor TMZ Article00:04:19
So for like my parents, like, they understood the accent.
It's like hard to survive to survive in Vancouver, Canada.
God forbid.
If he didn't have that New York accent, what would happen?
He wouldn't have made it.
You wouldn't have made it.
What would have happened?
I mean, would he become part of the Mickey Mouse Club?
Who knows?
If he sounded Canadian, bro, if he sounded like he was from Saskatchewan, it wouldn't have worked.
Try to smooth talk is Ryan Gosslin from Saskatchewan.
Yes, it probably wouldn't have worked.
But survival is maybe the wrong word.
Maybe not in regards to Brian Gosling, but I do know like for some folks when they immigrate to a certain spot, they start taking on the accent.
Like, yes, they weren't born there, but I understand a portion of why they do it because it just, you don't want to stand out because standing out oftentimes is a bad thing if you want to just leave a simple life.
You just want to go to work and like not have your boss single you out because the way that you talk, he worries that it upsets customers or whatever.
So I'm not mad at it because I understand why it's there.
Like I'm not mad at somebody who goes to a customer service job and all of a sudden they're not like, hey, what up?
Cuz they're like, yes, how can I do my name is how about this?
I worked at a call center.
We used to do things for like charities.
So we call people up to scam them.
And it's all scams.
And I would not say my name's ABBA.
Of course not.
I'd say, hey, my name is Michelle.
I would say in the French accent and I'll be like, and I would notice that the customers were more receptive to me once I had a name that they could identify with.
When I used to call it ABBA, I used to have recordings of this.
They would just hang up.
So I learned that if I wanted to keep this job and to make money when I'm struggling, I had to adapt my accent.
So when I hang up, hang up.
Bodegas in Canada.
I don't go up there.
Hey, what's up?
No.
I speak like them.
All right.
By February.
All right.
My good partner and chip.
I met me.
And I'm like, they're like, oh, he's us.
He's cool.
Not a threat.
Yeah, yeah.
We good.
Yeah, I think it's natural to this.
Yeah.
I think that's normal.
Yeah.
I understand the frustration when you see it, but I do think it is normal, especially if you're living in a place.
I didn't know that Ryan Gosling did that shit and he never even lived in New York.
No, he grew up, watched a lot of Marlon Brando movies and was like, yo, that's tough.
Any of the dude just suck dick?
Marlon Brando?
Oh, the actor that's what?
He's the gay actor, right?
Marlon Brando.
Didn't he fuck Richard Pryor?
Whoa.
Richard Pryor said some shit about.
I'm pretty sure Richard Bryce sucks a man with Marlon Brandon.
I'll look it up.
Yeah, you just said.
You didn't know he was gay?
I did not.
Was it Quincy Jones that said that?
I'm not crazy, bro.
I'm not crazy.
Nah, nah.
The Marlon.
I'm not going to look at me like this.
The fish people.
This is not some living shit.
Google that.
So, this is an article from TMZ.
It says, Richard Pryor's widow says, yes, he did bang Marlon Brandon.
Let's go.
Yeah.
Sorry.
You got really happy.
You got really happy someone fucked someone else.
You got.
I need to know.
You're really happy some dude somebody else.
This is from the show.
No, this is on TMZ.
It's all over.
I like it.
I think Quincy Jones and some shit.
Yeah, the whole article where he was airing some shit out.
No, I mean, Richard probably did say he sucked a dick.
I mean, at least he sucked the best.
Like, that motherfucker, Brando is one of the best.
Does he have a New York accent after you blow Brando?
Can you see it?
Yeah, 100%.
He blew it right into his fucking mouth.
Dude, he couldn't help but speak with a New York accent, dude.
He's fucking thrilled with me.
Oh, boys, we got to wrap it up.
We have one more story.
I don't care about it.
Do you guys care about it?
I don't give a fuck.
Okay, listen.
Tell them where they can find you.
Tell them about the tour.
Tell them about any other projects coming.
You know, we're big supporters over here.
So Abba and Preach, talk to the people.
You can find us on YouTube at ABBA and Preach.
We also have another channel called ABBA versus Preach.
And on Instagram, Abba and Preach, I have Eric Preach, aka at King Preach the Petty.