Andrew Schulz argues LeBron's Space Jam will fail because Warner Bros. prioritized nostalgic adults over modern kids who prefer Fortnite and Minecraft. He criticizes the film's outdated Looney Tunes characters, sexualized female roles, and alienating inside jokes, claiming it misses both generations. The segment escalates into a debate on animation standards, accusations of colorblindness regarding Black bunnies, and Mark Wahlberg's haircut, ultimately suggesting the movie's strategic missteps guarantee its commercial collapse. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Nostalgia vs New Cartoons00:03:39
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Here's something about the Space Jam movie that I don't know if we've spoken about in this podcast, but I think it's interesting.
Huge fuck up was using the old cartoon characters.
This is a kids' movie.
There are going to be adults that go out of nostalgia, right?
Yeah.
But these kids, they don't know what the fuck Daffy Duck is.
They don't know what Bab's Bunny or Bugs Bunny or any bunnies are.
Okay.
They know Fortnite.
They know Minecraft.
They know these video games.
They should have done the Space Jam movie with the new cartoon characters.
The issue is Warner Brothers.
It's Warner Brothers.
Well, Warner Brothers got to partner up with somebody else.
It's just another different, just a different movie.
That's pixels and Ralph.
What I'm saying is these kids don't give a fuck about those cartoons.
They're just dated.
The storylines don't matter to them.
There's no connectivity.
They just, instead of doing anything that was like updated for the audience, they just like updated it for adults.
They like tried to make them robots instead of...
It was just like, none of this matters.
And there was three things.
It was like the real D, the 2D, and the 3D version of it.
And LeBron is a cartoon.
But think about this.
You're a kid.
They bring you back to the 2D, the old cartoons, right?
That you've never seen in your life because you're a kid and you don't watch those cartoons.
It means nothing to you.
So that's just for the adults, right?
Then you see these cartoon characters that have like inside kind of like nuanced jokes playing off of the idea that you understand who these characters are.
You don't get it.
You don't understand why the lady's drinking a martini and she's drunk or this other guy has a lisp and he's just spitting all over the place.
You just don't like, what's going on here?
There's a lot of these inside jokes to a group of people that aren't on the inside.
It's literally a movie for adults.
But I didn't even see a lot of the cards.
The commercials that I saw, they didn't even show cartoon characters really being funny or making jokes.
Just some locker room stuff.
I mean, I saw like maybe an extended thing of it.
I was very like, they're just trying to do too much.
And I think if you at least kept it with the Space Jam thing, you could have got the adults.
Yeah.
Would have watched it for nostalgia.
Or if you do a modernized, you can get the kids, but they didn't do either.
I mean, he's missed the mark completely.
It's the most LeBron James way to do this.
If funny thing about it is like the, what's the guy's name who plays the villain?
Don Cheeto.
Yeah, Don Cheeto's character is like, and if you lose the game, all the cartoons will be deleted.
They've been deleted.
Nobody knows who they are.
It's done.
It's over, Warner Brothers.
It's not happening no more.
You didn't keep curating new cartoons with these characters.
So the next generation did not get attached to them.
It's over.
Don Cheeto won.
The only people I can see watching this are our generation.
And our generation doesn't really love LeBron.
Mark's generation likes LeBron.
That's their Jordan.
I spoke to a guy flight club who has LeBron tattooed on his leg, gave me all the reasons why Jordan isn't even close to as good as LeBron.
It was like, you couldn't even compare the two in his mind.
But us, we look at this movie like, why would they ever give anybody else in every way?
Space Jam.
Like, you can't, you can't do that.
The Space Jam LeBrons.
Look, the idea is that you get the parents who like the first one and bring their kids.
They introduce them to all these old school Warner Brothers characters, and then they can make spin-off movies and bring the bugs together.
LeBron Jordan Generational Divide00:03:34
That's fine, then do it back.
Do that shit with Dora the Explorer.
Do that shit with the SpongeBob, whatever it is.
SpongeBob SquarePants, whatever, right?
Like, you know what I mean?
Do that shit with Rick and Morty or whatever.
Like, do it with the cartoons that these kids fucking watch.
That's the issue, though.
Kids' cartoons now are like kind of trash.
I'm like looking through the fucking thing.
You would say that you old mother pig, bro.
Do it with Peppa Pig.
Kids love Peppa Pig, dog.
Fire.
Peppa Pig.
Peppa Pig?
Yeah, you're just old.
You don't know.
Yeah, you don't know.
My nieces love Peppa Pig.
Ninjago.
Do it with Ninjago.
Do it with the waifu with a tentacles.
Come go some waifu.
Let's go.
Tentacles are the dunk just like Michael at the end of the movie.
Real talk.
Stretch it out.
You know, so I just feel like they, like you said, miss the mark in every single way about this movie.
It's absurd.
Yes, it just seems so poorly done.
Like, I have no interest in watching it.
And Koogler, whatever his name is, I know to hit.
That's nice.
I also think if you're Cougar, it's like, I can't say no to this opportunity.
I get to remake Space Jam.
But you're remaking it within the confines of Warner Brothers, and Warner Brothers shit fell off.
It's just over.
I love Bugs Bunny when I was a kid.
It's too bad.
Yeah.
Too bad.
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Cougler did direct Space Champ 2, buddy.
Oh, he did?
No.
I'm so glad because I'm a big producer.
I'm like, oh, if he did this.
No, but a black guy, Malcolm Dealey.
Shout out to him.
Shout out to him.
Blackface Controversy Explained00:04:42
Damn, bro.
Black dude's been missing lately.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Yo.
No, but he directed movies like what, dog?
Y'all been missing lately, bro.
What else?
England.
He's a cool director.
That's what it was.
Soulman.
Space.
Barbershop, the next cut.
Night school.
Girls' trip.
Classics.
Roll Bounce.
Roll Bounce actually got roll bounce is great.
Nah, Girl's Trip was fun.
Tiffany had some decent that movie.
I made that movie.
But did it do well in the box office?
You can go.
I guess, no, that's an important thing.
Like, if it did well in the box office.
Because if it killed, it's like, yo, little kids loved it.
Exactly.
Maybe little kids still fuck with Looney Tunes.
Did it do well?
What's the numbers of it?
Because apparently, some of these shows like Sesame Street.
I mean, I just did one fucking Google search.
Nah, kids love Sesame Street.
Kids are still watching Sesame Street.
I have not a word about Space Chan from my nieces.
Sesame Street, I hear.
Peppa Pig, I hear.
Sesame Street's an institution.
Paw Patrol.
Nah, he was gone for a while.
I came back.
It was coming out this weekend.
Oh, it hasn't even come out yet.
Jesus Christ.
I mean, that's how you know.
This ugly ass lola.
I'm trying to see if it's going to be one of these films that also drops on.
That's another thing they did.
They didn't sexualize the female characters.
They purposefully desexualized.
That's what I'm saying.
And kids now, they love fucking anime, bro.
They like sexualized hair.
They want hentai.
They want waffles.
They want waffles.
Soggy waffle.
Yeah.
But, but for real, like, I know it sounds super weird, but they did this shit.
I think you would have joke about it with Simba's bitch.
What's her name?
Nah, Nala.
With Nala.
Nala's fine as fuck, yo.
You always make the character sexy.
The Pixar motherfuckers know how to do it.
The Incredibles, the mom look bad as fuck.
She got the super fatty with the tiny snatch waist.
Yeah, crazy dumb.
Crazy.
Walking around with fucking Rick Shaw.
She's like the Ricky.
You know what I mean?
She got the Rick and Tender back there, dog.
So I could have rode her into the wedding.
Real talk, bro.
This is incredible, dude.
Oh, my God.
Spanking that thing to speed it up.
Yeah, elastic puss jumping out.
Stretch it out, but not too stretch.
Yeah.
All of a sudden, they know what the fuck they're doing.
They're sexualizing the characters, and then it gets to the haircut, and it's like, we're a conservative.
Yeah.
We know what you're doing.
Yeah, we get it.
We know what you're doing.
You're a high neckline, but we know what's going on underneath.
Listen, them bunnies be fucking, bro.
Give her some fucking stuff.
They fuck like rabbits.
Listen, they be fucking like rabbits.
There's a saying for a reason.
Bunnies is out there fucking.
They get it.
You know, they want some of that special sauce or what is it?
LeBron's with a Jordan special.
Secret sauce.
Secret sauce.
Yeah.
Special stuff or secret stuff.
What?
What?
You don't think that Lola Bunny shot her shot at MJ back in the day trying to throw them?
You don't think MJ took that down, bro?
Yeah.
I mean, I don't see a black bunny anymore.
You ever seen a black bunny, bro?
Nope.
You out of your mind now?
Back and ball?
Nope.
Come on, bro.
What is this guy talking about?
You never seen a black bunny, bro.
No.
Bro, never seen a black bunny.
Every one of them good luck feet is black.
No, they're always white.
Nah.
They're always white.
No, they're not.
The magician's rabbits, always fucking black.
Black.
Always white.
Nah.
What do you mean?
Playboy bunny?
See, that's black.
Playboy bunny.
Always white.
I think you're colorblind, bro.
If I'll be honest with you, I think you're a color.
Energizer bunny?
What about Energizer Bunny?
White.
Damn, bro.
Listen, no black bunnies.
Real talk.
Try to name a black bunny.
Yeah, because you can't mark it as fuck.
You can't mark it anymore.
You need a bunny to put on Weedies box, bro.
That's what he has.
You can't market as black bunnies.
You can put on Weedie's box.
What about Easter Bunny?
Cad Burns Bunny.
My Easter Bunny was Asian, actually.
Chocolate Easter Bunny.
Nah, my Easter Bunny was very Asian.
And Black Santa.
You did not have a Black Santa.
You wanted a Black Santa.
I had a Black Santa.
You had Black Santa?
Yeah.
No way.
You really gonna make me prude to you Black Santa right now?
That is the bravest man on the planet.
Black Santa, bro.
Breaking into motherfuckers' houses.
Breaking into white people's houses, knowing they own guns.
It's the presence.
Come on, bro.
Let me see.
Let me see.
Get the fuck out of here.
They got a whole Santa and blackface, bro.
Oh, my God.
And Mark looks wildly gay with the white Killmonger haircut.
Son, he got your haircut that you want.
Show that off to Alex right now.
This is crazy.
Mark knows what it is.
He really tried to call my bluffs.
Bring that back.
He said, You do not have a black Santa.
Watch me.
Dude, I still don't know.
Jury's out if he's actually black.
He might be a blackface.
Nah, he's a fully black Santa.
Watch that.
I'm gonna pull it up.
Nah, bro.
That's a black Santa.
That's so fat.
Yeah.
Oh, that's the dude didn't get out.
Son, I thought you were going to say that's his professor that he was.