Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh announce their Netflix special arriving December 17th, a four-part review of 2020's divisive events including coronavirus conspiracies and Black Lives Matter. The production faced near-collapse when Akash contracted COVID-19, spreading to the New York comedy scene, yet the delay allowed script refinement. They debate Jake Paul's boxing advantages against Nate Robinson and Antonio Brown, analyze racial dynamics in sports matchups, and mock Taylor Rossi's naive infrastructure questions before concluding with vaccine skepticism and a promotion for their upcoming special. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
|
Time
Text
Welcome To Flagrant 200:14:53
What's up, everybody?
Welcome to Flagrant 2.
Okay, my name is Andrew Schultz.
I'm here with Akash Singh, Alex Media, Mark Gagnon, Taylor's in the building, the on again, off again, fifth wheel of this podcast.
We're glad to have you back.
Make sure you keep those notes on point, though.
Okay, we need those notes, Taylor.
Today's a big episode.
We got some big information we got to drop.
Big.
Netflix got a Schultz special.
Hey!
They landed the big fish.
Okay?
The bottled nose dolphin.
Is that the one with the biggest nose?
Yeah.
Moby Dick.
We got Duff Mammon in the building, too.
You can't hear him because he doesn't have a mic, but we love him.
And we're going to tell you a story about all the things that happened to get us where we are today.
I'm absolutely fucking exhausted.
I know Alex Media is exhausted.
I know Mark Gagnon's exhausted.
I know Dove Mammon is exhausted.
We've been working our ass off on this project, and we're very excited to show it to all of you on the 17th, man.
It's going to be on Netflix.
And I want to break records for the watch list.
So make sure you add it to your watch list and then tell them to let you know when it releases.
Because, yeah, I think that there's a little trick there that we're going to use.
But yeah, I'm so excited for you guys to see this, man.
We've been working so hard on this for the last three months.
Some of you guys knew we were up to something.
Charlamagne damn near said I was having a child.
My girl was getting all these DMs, right?
Because somehow some of you psychos found my girl's Instagram.
She's getting these DMs.
She's hit me and she's like, are we pregnant?
I'm getting all these congratulations, DMs.
I guess Charlemagne said on idiots that I was pregnant.
That you're pregnant, yeah.
And then he goes, no, I was just using it as a metaphor.
And I listened back and all he says was, Schultz is pregnant.
That's not a metaphor.
That's just saying I'm fucking pregnant.
Bank account about to be pregnant.
Yes, the bank account.
The bank account.
All right.
The bank account.
All right.
Right now.
Shit might change a little bit.
But yeah, man, I'm just really excited.
And I just, I'm very proud of this thing.
I can't wait for y'all to see it, man.
And I'm just so grateful for all y'all for watching the monologues that we've been doing.
Basically, what we did is our weekly monologues we did as a four-part hour-long special.
It's a year-end review, essentially.
It's tapping into four of the biggest, most divisive events of this year.
And obviously, coronavirus, we got conspiracy theories, Black Lives Matter, and, of course, a nation divided.
So I'm just so excited to see this, man, and for you guys to see it.
And I understand, I was saying this earlier, but I understand that I'm going to get the credit for this, obviously, because I'm the leader of the band, if you will, and the lead singer.
But this was a monumental effort by so many other people.
First of all, I got to congratulate Mark.
Mark is a co-creator of this show, man.
He wrote it.
Oh, yeah.
And this is a big move.
He did an absolutely great job, not only during this show, but also the 17 weeks that you put in before you fucking killed it.
You grinded.
I'm so proud of you.
And you murdered it, man.
I'm so grateful to have you part of it.
Alex Media made his directorial debut.
Okay.
That's right.
That's right.
And you absolutely murdered it, man.
I was so proud of you.
You stepped up to the occasion.
You were too confident.
You were too confident.
I thought you were going to be insecure.
I thought you were going to be like nervous telling people what to do.
But Alex was back there, man.
He was just snapping at motherfuckers, telling them where to be, what angles he wanted.
I was so impressed.
That shit was so funny.
You guys think that?
Because inside, I was, oof, I was nervous.
Really?
I was nervous.
You know what?
Honestly, what I say after the first shoot date, I even said to you, I was like, man, you were so confident back there.
You really rose to the occasion.
That's what's up.
Yeah.
I was nervous.
I was so grateful.
Al didn't know all the lingo, but he knew exactly what he wanted.
Yeah.
So he was just telling motherfuckers to do shit.
Just be like, yeah, make it more like this, like this way.
Yeah.
And they were like, all right.
Yeah, that's how we communicate.
That's a new work day.
Mark don't understand that.
You got to speak to Mark like Alexa.
You know what I mean?
Like, you can't.
Like, if you got, Mark don't understand it unless you ask a very specific, what is the weather today?
But if you go, what's it like outside?
He'll be like, oh, I missed that.
Plus civil unrest, actually, now that you mention it.
But also, I got to congratulate Dub, man.
Dub is my first friend that I ever made in college.
He's one of my best friends in the world, and he'd been working in entertainment, you know, toiling in obscurity for years.
And I thought that we should save him by bringing him on to this product.
No, in all seriousness, he's an absolutely brilliant guy.
And I knew when we were younger, we were going to do something together.
You know, when we were in college, we were thinking about doing a radio show together.
And then we realized we had to be up at 3 a.m. to do that shit.
And we're like, nah, we'd rather be fingering chicks.
But for real, we always knew we were going to do something.
And then he went on to great things in Hollywood.
And the second I had this opportunity, I was like, we need him here.
And he was an integral part in not only getting this done, but giving us so much Jewish anxiety that it's unbelievable, dude.
Dude, I don't know how you are not shredded from stress.
He lives in this.
Dude, it's unbelievable.
He's comfy in the fire.
This guy will find problems you didn't even know existed.
It's like a fucking cloud around him.
It's a gravitational pull, bro.
It's a gravitational pull.
It was unbelievable.
So, so, yeah, so everything was going great until Akash shut the whole thing down with Corona.
I sure did.
Dude, literally, things, the first shoot, we were all so proud of it.
We're like, oh, this is going great.
We're ahead of schedule.
We'll get the writing down.
Everything is great.
Then Akash gives me a text.
He's like, yo, man, I got Corona.
Yeah, man.
And I'm the type of guy, and I mean this sincerely, and this is something that before this really tested me because I'm the type of guy that's like, everything happens for a reason, but I don't mean that in like a corny sense.
Like, you know, when a child gets cancer or whatever like that, obviously it doesn't happen for a fucking reason.
But like my mentality on life is that if you, I consider myself a problem solver.
So it's like, if you look at everything in front of you and figure out how you can, you know, problem solve and use it to your advantage, you'll start to believe that things are happening for you, that there's some greater power out there looking out for you.
When in reality, you're creating your luck by taking whatever circumstances you've been given and making the best out of them, right?
It was hard for me to get there when you did that shit, bro, and you gave us Corona, bro.
I needed a good three days, dude.
I was like, what is the lesson here?
How do I learn from this, right?
Yeah.
And man, I was so angry.
And it was so unfair because you didn't want to give us Corona.
Bro, those are physically, Corona didn't affect me.
Emotionally.
Emotionally?
The darkest week and a half of my life.
I gave it to the people I work with the most who are working on the biggest project of their lives.
I don't, and you also don't know who got what until their test.
I saw my in-laws the day before.
One of them is in his 60s.
I'm freaking the fuck out.
Like, did I fucking, is this guy going to get Corona?
Loketo, that's a power move right there.
I'm the only daddy now.
No, bro.
And then fucking, when we did History Hyenas, I might have given it to them.
And DeStefano was like, I know what you're going to do.
You're going to let Schultz become emperor and then you're going to take him out.
And I'm like, what the fuck just happened?
No.
Yo, you said that exactly.
I crashed.
He probably left some fucking corona potion on the seat or something like that.
I thought about every single thing that happened on Sunday and Monday before I got my test.
That's all you're doing for five days when you're waiting for everybody to get the results.
So I come in Monday feeling fucking fantastic, do a podcast with the hyenas.
It's great.
Whatever.
Go home that night, feel fine.
Tuesday, the next day, afternoon, I start feeling like a little bodyache and shit.
But I just worked out really hard the day before.
He felt fine Monday, Giannis.
Yes, okay.
That's important to know.
Giannis is going around spreading this fucking lie that Akash felt sick and still came into the fucking studio.
I would never in my fucking life.
But also, not only, let's say you didn't care about Giannis or Chris getting it.
You're not going to walk in the studio where we're creating the Netflix special, right?
And then infect everybody and shut that down.
Never.
Also, you're asthmatic.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Like, if you have Corona, you're terrified.
And if I should be dead.
If I saw my in-law Sunday and thought I was sick Monday, I'm not going anywhere.
I'm freaking the fuck out that they're okay.
And Monday, I'm like, yo, guys, I cannot go outside.
But I understand where Yannis is coming from because he's pissed.
He's when you get so angry.
And he got sick.
Yeah, yeah, he got sick.
Giannis is still sick.
Yeah, I feel terrible about him.
Yo, son, I tried to send a doctor out to him.
That motherfucker lives in Sleepy Hollow.
So literally, I'm like, all right, I'm going to get a doctor to just go check on you, bro.
And I go, when I say that, that means I'm going to ask Dove to do it.
Right, right.
So I go, I got you.
And then I just did a group text.
He got you.
And Dove was trying to get someone over there.
And Dove is a convincing ass motherfucker.
Okay.
He couldn't get nobody to go up to where Giannis lives, bro.
Yannis lives deep.
And these nurses are running around the city just poking noses.
Well, he had to go to the hospital.
So he got all the doctors he needed.
Wait, did he have to go?
A fish?
Diarrhea dehydration.
I don't know.
They'll probably say it.
I'm going to be honest with you, bro.
That dehydration shit is mad pussy, bro.
Drink some water, bro.
It's right there.
You're not dehydrating in the desert.
Have a free.
Dehydrated in Westchester.
That's it.
Drink some water.
That's it.
Wait, isn't that all you got to do for dehydration or is there another thing?
No, I think you're shitting so much there's nothing you can do.
You're like losing electricity.
Go in the shower.
Electrolytes and stuff.
But can't you just keep drinking as much as you can?
I know this because it's happened to me.
I've had to go to the hospital.
Right.
But corona didn't affect me that badly.
So Giannis, you mad pussy.
I'm compensating because I feel fucking horrible.
No, Akash felt so bad because he really infected half of the New York comedy scenes.
Bro, I, oh my God.
The next day, New York comedy legend, comedy legend in general, right?
Colin Quinn, absolutely brilliant comic, goes on Chris and Giannis' podcast, right?
And they fucking bullied him to get him over there by saying, come on, bro, come out to Brooklyn.
We're going to have some pizza.
And Colin's like a sucker for like real New York pizza.
He's a real New York guy.
You know what I mean?
I think Colin grew up in Brooklyn, actually, not far from there.
It's like, yeah, we're going to get pizza from Yamity Yamities or whatever the fuck's going to tell you shit.
And Colin's like, all right, fine.
I can't turn down pizza, right?
And he goes out there.
They don't even have the pizza.
Pizza's like being delivered while they're doing the podcast while he's just snorting Corona for an hour and a half, right?
But Colin had a heart attack recently.
It's bad news.
Son.
Bro, when I call Colin, he's feeling sick.
He goes, yeah, I heard your co-host.
I heard your co-host went on to the podcast sick knowingly.
And I'm like, no, he didn't go in.
He's all the fucking chance.
And I'm a fan of Colin, too.
I was like, dog, this is...
That being said, I do think it would be absolutely hilarious that an Indian dude would be taking white people out with a virus.
On Thanksgiving.
Yeah, on Thanksgiving.
Dude, I got a call from Rogan.
He's like, yo, I heard your co-host went on the podcast.
Sick, blah, blah.
That's when I reached out to you and I was like, yo, go talk to Giannis.
He's having hallucinations about what happened.
But thank God, Colin's okay.
Yeah.
I hope he didn't give it to more people.
I texted Colin to apologize and whatever.
He was super understanding, super nice.
Nah, he wasn't.
I felt bad for him.
Akash, man.
This motherfucker was hitting me up like three, four times a day, just making sure I wasn't still alive and shit like that.
You didn't even tell me you had pneumonia, son.
I'd have told you I can put you with somebody.
My dumbass, I tried to fucking sweat it out.
I was like, I ain't taking no meds.
I'm just going to sweat this shit out.
I was just getting worse and worse and worse.
I swear to God.
I checked on.
Sorry, I checked on Colin, right?
I'm just checking on him.
He's like, no, everything's okay.
And I go, then all of a sudden, I get this text from him.
It's a picture, and it's a Google search.
And in the Google search, it says Akash name meaning in English.
Oh, yeah.
Right?
So he's texting me.
And then the meaning is boy, Hindu, Indian, from the Sanskrit Akash, meaning upper sky or ether.
Akash Ganga is the name of the skydiving team in the Indian Air Force.
Oh, my God.
Right?
And then the Air Force.
And the next thing he texts me is airborne.
Explanation.
Yo, it's destiny, bro.
It really was.
Dang.
Anyway, so Akash gets us all Corona.
We got to shut down the fucking production.
Yeah, buddy.
Now, this is a review.
Not the review, but we are touching on the four most divisive topics of 2020.
Yeah.
You can't put that out after 2020.
After 2020, it's over.
Nothing.
You got to address it in 2020.
Right?
So we're all terrified.
We're like, oh my God, is this going to be pushed back?
Are we going to get back sooner?
I got IV docs coming to my fucking house every day, jamming syringes in my arm, trying to get this Corona out of my system.
I don't know exactly.
I'm on the phone with Rogan trying to get Regeneron, right?
He's like, I might have a connect.
I'm going to see if I can get you something.
I'm taking pills, vitamin D all the fucking time.
I'm freaking out.
Mark swears he didn't have any symptoms at all.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Because he always fronts like he don't get sick at all.
I've never been sick before.
Exactly.
Never been sick.
Al is damn near dead.
Damn near dead.
So here's the thing: all of us are terrified that we're going to give it to our girls as well.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I've thought all this through.
Yeah.
None of our girls got corona.
Power of the pussy.
Power with the pussy.
I wasn't in that pussy, but I was quarantined from that pussy.
But how the fuck did my girl not get Corona, bro?
Yeah, that's kind of a little suspect.
It's a little beta male.
Yeah, it's a little bit of a male.
I feel beta.
That's how I felt.
I mean, we were together.
We were like making out.
I mean, I'm relieved to hear this, to be honest.
What?
Did yours get it?
Mine got it.
Not as bad as me.
She lost smell for a little bit.
Oh, by the way, I just want to point out: I did I tell you when I lost smell and taste?
Yes, you did.
Yeah.
What did you do this?
Oh, no, no.
It was the morning, but did the night, the morning of the day before, but I tell you how I found out.
No.
I was eating my girl's pussy.
I was eating my girl's pussy.
And I swear to God, it sounds like a hack joke.
I actually told Neil Brennan this, and then Neil Brennan goes, first time she ever came.
No, but hammering it.
I'm literally going down there.
And the reason I went down immediately, I went down immediately because I'm so stressed out whether or not we're going to be able to do this shit or not.
I don't know what the fuck is going down.
So I'm so stressed out.
I'm like, are we going to do this shit?
Meaning, make the Netflix special, right?
I'm like, not have sex.
I knew I wasn't going to be able to do that.
So I was like, let me just find my girl.
I can't, you know, let's make the hood this happen.
I go down, bro, and I'm going after it.
And I'm licking away, right?
And I'm just like, this is weird.
Stress Over The Netflix Special00:15:18
Like, where's the flavor?
You know what I mean?
Like, usually there's some flavor if you get out there in that prime rib.
You know what I'm saying?
But there was no flaves.
And I was like, that's odd.
This is just so odd.
You know, she's been sleeping the whole night marinating.
And then what, dude?
She's marinating the whole night.
You get that morning.
Y'all never let it marinate overnight.
So you just gave her head and they went to sleep.
Yo, no, I went down there to try to get that hot box.
She's been under the duvet.
Stop.
Do you know what I mean?
And I'm trying to get that hot box.
I'm trying to lick them pennies.
You know what I'm saying?
So I'm out there.
I'm out there trying to get my change purse on and I'm licking and I, and it's nothing.
It tastes like zero.
It doesn't taste, it doesn't taste good.
It doesn't taste bad.
It tastes nothing.
And in that moment, I literally get so fucking scared because I'm like, oh my God, what's going to happen?
It's just going to push things back even more.
I go limp, right?
Now I'm terrified that I go limp.
So I'm starting to hump the bed, see if I can like get my lips.
Like a horny dog, like a horny dog trying to get my pink stick out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I try to get that pink stick.
I don't know what was going on.
I was going through a lot.
I felt like Dub on a Tuesday.
Yeah.
Lip sticking.
This is Doves every Tuesday, just straight paranoid.
The second Dub wakes up like this, just starts humping the bed right away.
First thing.
So I go, I get up when I realize I get up.
I run into the kitchen.
I grab the dry cherries because I'm like, what's going to have a flavor?
Yeah.
Choo, choo, choo.
Nothing.
I open up the fridge, olives, choo, choo, choo, nothing.
I'm like, oh fucking boy.
I go out.
She brings a candle.
I can't smell anything.
Literally, right after that, she starts preparing Thanksgiving dinner.
I think it was that day or the next day.
And I'm like, this motherfucker is piling on, bro.
Would you finish the job though?
Nah.
No, I haven't, bro.
No, I haven't.
And I really should have.
Yeah, I should have ate that stank, too.
I should have gone after that.
He said, no, I haven't, meaning still.
Like, to this day.
No, I got to get back down there and finish that meal.
You know what I'm saying, Taylor?
Yeah.
Save game, dude.
Save game.
That's how you do it.
What did she say?
You made her come?
Say what?
Did you make her come?
Nah, I'm working on that.
You know, you got to say something.
So did you finger her or something?
Say what?
Did you finger her?
No, I didn't.
I was terrified.
You don't.
So you just lick?
I licked it.
You licked it, but you're terrified to finger her while licking it.
No, I was terrified of the special we were shooting and not being able to complete it because of Corona.
No, I understand that, but you said that.
Never mind.
Yeah, we're good.
Taylor, how do you eat pussy with your fingers?
I don't eat pussy.
You have once.
You said you had once.
No, I haven't.
Someone ate me out.
But she did that shit like a dude.
Like, yeah.
Like, nah, nah, I don't get fucked.
I fucked.
Yeah.
I got top.
Yeah.
I got that toppy sloppy.
Did you grab her hair and push that shit forward?
Yeah.
You fucking beast.
Yo, Taylor's a bully, bro.
Stop getting that pussy ate bully style.
That's crazy.
You did that.
Did you rip off the wig?
She was Spanish.
She was?
She had that good hair, huh?
Yo, yo.
Rolling R's, bro.
She's down there.
It wasn't good, though.
That's how it wasn't good.
I love eating pussies.
Even the women are just like, nah, I'll do it.
I don't give a shit.
No.
You really happy a Spanish girl went down on you, huh?
It wasn't good.
I left.
Why wasn't it good?
I don't know.
What?
I was high and I was.
Do you think maybe you don't know?
I was surprised by what was going on, too, though.
So that's why.
Wait, did you know about it?
Was it some Cosby situation?
I told you.
Are you describing something horrible right now?
Is this an assault?
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know how to handle this because it's a woman with a woman.
So I'm like, I'm pretty sure that's still rape.
Yeah, what is that?
That's just yoga.
Yo, that's hot yoga.
You know when they come up to you and they're like, lean a little deeper into this pose.
She was getting fucked while she was eating me out.
Oh, that's why I wasn't good.
It's like the jackhammer.
You're distracted, yo.
I didn't like it.
That's multitasking.
Yeah, multitask like that.
I don't know.
She probably just banging her nose up against it.
That's how I eat the pussy.
Real duck.
That's the best way.
Anyway, so Akash gave us all Corona, gave the New York comedy scene, Corona.
And I never got Corona for the record.
Yes, you did.
You definitely got Corona.
I never got Corona either.
You didn't get Corona.
No.
Dove didn't get Corona.
Al got it.
Mark got it.
I tested positive for Corona, but I never got it.
You thought it was a corporate.
I gave it to the family.
Shut up.
I never got it.
I gave it to everyone I do the podcast with and also the three most important people for your special.
Yeah, yeah.
Like the three most integral people got it.
And then everybody else was like, yeah, you could be quarantined and be fine.
And they didn't get it.
They didn't get it.
That's right.
Holy shit.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
I had nothing to do but think about this, guys.
This all crossed my mind.
It was like pure sabotage, dude.
Oh, it was unbelievable.
And then every time I would start to mentally be like, yo, it's going to be all right.
Don't worry about it.
I would get some other news.
Even Andrew losing taste and smell was like, oh, it sucks.
Fuck, whatever.
He'll be all right.
Then it's like, yo, did you know you were sick?
Fucking Rogan is texting me.
And I'm just like, yo, every time I'm like, all right, here's daylight.
We're out of the shitstorm.
I would get something else.
It's just like, oh, here's another thing that you're going to be feeling like shit about for about 72 hours.
I don't want to tell you this because I want to just stay in this moment where we make you feel absolutely horrible about this.
But I love you too much, so I can't.
Just tell us.
Don't tell him.
No, no, no.
It actually, I think, helped us.
In the grand scheme of things, in the moment, we would have never been able to tell.
But having that extra time allowed us to analyze certain scripts, make more images, and really look at the flow of the content in a way that we wouldn't have been able to because of shooting schedule.
So when I say everything happens for a reason, this might have been the reason that actually happened.
I will say this.
Thank fucking God, you did not come to the engagement dinner.
Yeah.
Because you would have killed my parents.
Yeah.
You couldn't come.
Remember, he couldn't come to the engagement dinner.
Because it was on Diwali.
It was on Diwali.
And, bro, I mean, imagine, though.
Diwali saved it, bro.
Yo.
Yo, thank God.
Praise be to that.
Thank God.
Who do we praise for that one?
For Diwali.
All of them.
All of them.
You give, there's just a holiday for all the gods.
No, cheap Indian motherfuckers.
Additional holidays.
Make a bogo.
Come on.
No, I'm just saying, thank God in general at work.
But there's holidays for Ram.
Oh, thank Ram, bro.
Yeah.
Well, look, man.
It's a wild time.
I'm very excited for you guys to see this, man.
I'm very grateful.
Sorry, assholes.
It's all my fault.
But we back, y'all.
Assholes, we back, bro.
We back.
You know, we're not leaving you unless it was something that was out of our control.
And this was out of our control.
But fucking A, man.
It's good to be back.
We worked our asses on this, man.
We fucking bled on this.
I'm telling you.
Left it all on the table.
I saw them grinding.
It was unreal.
Like, just fucking non-stop.
Even Robbie and F.A. I'm sorry.
I got to make sure I, did I, did I compliment?
I know we.
Robbie and F.A.
I don't know if you're saying that.
Yeah, that's what I was about to say.
Like, but I complimented you, Dove on this version of it.
You did, Dove, yeah.
Okay.
We recorded earlier, but there was a problem with one of the cameras.
And I also want to compliment and just thank Robbie Slovic, a hilarious comic that wrote on the show with us, and also F.A. Ilguy, who's never written comedy in his life for just jumped on board.
And he absolutely killed it, man.
He was so helpful.
And there's a million other people we need to thank.
Yo, actually, I really want to thank this one guy who was an editor on this, John Raffanelli.
Yo, legend.
Exactly.
This guy's a fucking legend.
Thank you so much, John.
We're going to steal you from Jax Media, the production company that's been working with us.
There's going to be another time where I actually thank everybody.
So I don't want the people thinking that I'm not being thankful for you right now.
We're going to really go for the official one, but I just need to shout those specific people out.
And then two other people out.
I got to shout out Justin Bieber because Justin Bieber shared my stuff.
He shares my stuff with a lot of people, man.
He's a fucking great guy for that.
Love the Biebs, yo.
Love the Beebs.
Shout out to the Beebs, but also Scooter Braun because Justin shared this with Scooter.
And Scooter and I started talking and figuring out what we wanted to potentially do with this.
And that dude is legit, man.
I will give credit where credit is, dude.
That motherfucker is legit at what he does.
There's a lot of useless managers and agents out there.
Yeah, most of them.
Most of them.
But that guy is skilled and talented, and he is where he is for facts, facts, facts.
So, yeah, we're very excited about this, man.
I cannot even begin.
We're going to tell you more about it in the time it comes, but like, I cannot even begin to tell you how many little things are in this special.
Little jokes that only the assholes will get.
Little things are in pictures that only the assholes will get.
You know what I mean?
I mean, there's so many tiny little things in here.
There's not a single person on the planet that will be able to get every single joke that is in this special.
There's a lot.
If you had to guess, how many you think?
How many jokes you think?
In the whole thing?
I was trying to calculate that.
Really?
Yeah.
If you count the jokes that are in the pictures, thousands.
Yeah.
I mean, it's dude, there's no way you could get every single one of it.
I literally think it's going to be like, you know, like a Jay-Z album where you listen to it again and you're like, oh, he said that.
Or like one of those movies, like a Nolan movie where you like watch it for the second time.
You're like, oh, that happened.
Like, I literally think you're going to, you could watch each episode four times and you probably won't get every single joke, every single switch in the picture.
Like, so many of us are in the pictures.
Obviously, you're going to notice, you know, us, but you'll notice, I mean, Akash might even be, you know, in some stuff.
You never know.
I want another episode.
You know what I mean?
You never know, bro.
You never know.
It's also really cool because projects like these, a lot of times, like people will just bring on a bunch of people to do all the stuff.
You'll bring in like directors, bring in editors, whatever.
But for this project, it was us in this room that did what?
The whole thing.
95%.
I'm going to be honest, it really was.
And I wouldn't have it any other way because at the end of the day, for this project, I want to be able, I know that we put out the exact thing we want to put out.
You know what I mean?
Like, it's different when you put out a project and you're like, well, this is what they let me.
This is what we want to do.
There's nothing in this project that we didn't want to do.
We hired a production company, Jax Media, and shouts out to them, man.
They handled all the legal, the paying for stuff, but they also had some great staff over there as well.
And all the picture editors killed it.
The picture editors killed it.
And shout to Miles McCreary, man.
I cannot even begin to tell you, man.
I put my faith in people that are talented.
There's one thing I'll compliment myself on, and there's a lot more than one.
I can recognize talent, bro.
And I'll be honest, I really believe that in myself.
And I mean that.
And the first thing I look for is competence in human beings.
And I saw it with Alex when we first started working together.
And I was like, yeah, he don't know how to fucking edit, but he'll learn.
You know what I mean?
He'll figure it out.
The first thing you sent me was shit.
Do you remember it?
Yeah.
It was horrible.
But I was like, but he will learn how to do it.
What was it?
It was horrible, dude.
It was so bad.
It was so bad.
You know what?
But it was like you were doing the joke of the day or some shit like that.
And he kind of animated the joke of the day.
He added pictures in it.
It was almost like this.
Oh, shit.
I created this shit.
I'll be honest with you.
This show I did a long time ago with my brother.
Oh, really?
This American Hype.
It's called This American Hype.
There's still some episodes that are up there.
When I first reached out to you via DM, I was asking you to bring that shit back because I actually liked that episode.
It was a great show.
It took a lot of time.
And shout out to my brother Greg, man.
But I just, yeah, bring this back.
I mean, also, we got to give a shout out to Bill Maher.
Bill Maher is the reason why we started doing these monologues.
He did a monologue about why it wasn't racist to call it the China virus.
And so many people were sending me this thing around.
And I've had this thought for a while, but I was like, oh, people really need an explanation for their feeling that is not politically correct.
They feel it.
They just don't know how to articulate it in a way that won't be costly at their job, in their social circle, et cetera.
And I remember I hit up Mark and I was like, yeah, you see this thing?
We can do this 10 times better.
Shout out to Bill Maher.
Real talk.
We give him a shout out in the special.
Bro, there's so many shots, bro.
It's just so crazy, bro.
And it's so crazy.
I can't give away too much, but it's so crazy seeing the people in real life that we give shots to because I've interacted with them, kind of, some people.
Can you name any?
Yeah, the guy Dale from The Bachelorette.
Which one is Dale?
He's the most recent season.
I'm acting like you don't watch the Bachelorette.
You fucking.
I asked.
I was asking, which one is he?
Because I'm trying to think of it.
He's the guy who just won.
He won.
He won.
Do the girls stop the season halfway?
Oh, that guy.
Yeah.
I'm glad you gave him a shot.
Fuck that guy, Cornball ass.
Yeah.
I hate that, motherfucker, yo.
We got to do bachelorette recaps out this bit.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
We got it all planned.
So, but yeah, man, it's just, it's just so much fun.
Yeah.
That's the other cool thing about it.
It's equal opportunity.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like, everybody's going to get these jokes.
Jokes everywhere.
And when we say everybody, we mean everybody.
Okay.
I'm just excited for y'all to see it, man.
I'm so proud of it.
We're just watching it down.
How do you guys feel, man?
How was your experience with it?
I haven't taken it all in yet.
Nah?
Yeah.
Yo, Al really had no clue what the schedules were.
It's amazing.
We were making fun of him last night about this shit.
This guy was so removed from what was going on.
Because I get stressed and shit like that.
Not me.
Mark be getting stressed.
You learned that.
Mark gets you stressed.
Mark gets me stressed because he asked me the same question over and over again, bro.
What happens if we don't get it by two?
I go, well, then they'll get it when we get it because we have dates that you have to hit.
Right.
Or that they give you dates and then we move those dates.
I'm going to be honest.
From the outside, I've always felt the opposite.
It always felt like Mark is just living.
Oh, nah, you should have seen it.
This motherfucker was stressed.
Oh, Juno.
You've been sick with Corona for three fucking weeks.
I went from the outside.
So.
There's rules to life, okay?
Nah, dad.
Nah, fuck that.
This guy, he asked me the same fucking question four times in a row.
So what happens if we do it?
And it's like, bro, they're going to get it when they fucking get it.
It's the 10 commandments.
Okay.
What about them?
Thou shalt meet deadlines.
What commandment is that?
Yeah, when you're raised with strict deadlines and rules, okay, that are written out.
You got to believe.
You got to obey them.
You know?
I don't know what this excuse that he's making is right now, bro.
Yeah, I can know.
Honest Updates And Life Rules00:04:38
Anyway, Al didn't even know how to use the editing system that we edited on eight days before the fucking thing started.
Okay.
Al edits in Final Cut Pro.
Yeah.
Like a 14-year-old.
Premiere is the professional program.
It's going to still be fire.
I know.
Stop it.
It says it'll still be fire.
But now we got to edit, right?
I even told him this months before we started this.
I was like, you have to start learning Premiere.
I will pay for you to take classes in Premiere.
And then he came to me once.
He was like, nah, you could just do it on Final Cut.
And then there's a codec or he said some word.
I don't know what the fuck meant.
And then he goes, that will just transfer it over to Premiere.
And I go, all right.
Even though I knew it wasn't all right.
Nah, there's really a system that you can do.
I know, but it's not going to allow the other guys to work with it, too.
So then I go, Al, did you learn how to do it?
He goes, nah, I got it.
Every once in a while, I pop into edit.
And this guy on one screen has YouTube tutorials.
He thinks I don't notice his YouTube tutorials.
The YouTube, how do you separate audio, video?
I was like, we're not going to finish this stuff.
Right?
Thank God I didn't tell Mark or fucking.
That's why he had a babe by himself because he got to learn premieres.
Real talk.
If Dove didn't knew about this, forget it, bro.
Forget it, bro.
He's been spinning like a dreidel, dude.
I swear to God.
He just loses fucking mind.
Tasmanian devil.
That's what Jove is.
Premier is easy.
What's that?
Premiere is easier than Final Cut, though.
Nah, Final Cut is mad easy.
Premiere is fucking tricky.
No, it's nice.
No, it's like.
I'm talking shit like I know.
I'm about to say, how do you even know?
I was taught on Final Cut Pro first.
And then once going into radio, I learned Premiere.
And then Premiere was much easier for me than Final Cut.
I got to make a real quick announcement.
My bad.
We're going to get back to this.
Shout out to everybody.
I don't think we need to get back to this.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
Yo, shout out to everybody that copped the newest season of fashion.
Okay.
We already got the cease and desist for Nike from the sweatshirt that I'm wearing right now.
We just want to say thank you, Nike, for letting us do that.
Now, here's the thing: I got to be honest with y'all.
The fashion, we basically, how do I explain this?
We basically forced our supplier to keep the store open after it was sold out because I wanted everybody who listened to the podcast to get a chance to do it.
So we bought a certain amount of garments to make sure we can do it.
Those sold out actually first day, but I was like, listen, there's no pod.
We can't get on the pod, but we got to let the people who listen to the pod regularly that might not follow me on Instagram, might not even see the Instagram post, be able to do it.
So we're letting you guys do it.
It probably won't be up past this week.
I know it's what, Wednesday when this comes out, Wednesday night.
I don't think it'll be up past.
We're going to let people and idiots do it maybe Saturday.
Maybe the latest Sunday.
I don't know.
Fashion.shop, go get that shit.
It's probably going to be gone by then, but we wanted to let the assholes go out there and get there.
They're this season's worth.
If you already got the just do-it-yourself tea, you have a collector's item, okay?
Never to be sold again without a lawsuit.
So, fashion.shop, go check that out, man.
Thank y'all so much for supporting.
Now, back to the show.
What was it?
What were we talking about?
Nothing.
Anyway, was there anybody else?
I know we got to thank a lot of people over at Jax and a lot of people.
And we recorded something earlier, so I feel bad if I said thank you to someone that I forgot.
No, I don't think so.
But just the immediate team.
Yeah.
Well, if we forgot about you, we will hit you on a later date, man.
But thank y'all so much.
All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second, man.
Stop being bald.
Stop going bald.
Take care of yourself, fellas.
Ladies, if your boyfriend, your husband, your side dude starting to go bald, just tell him.
It's going to be painful for him to hear at first, but the reality is there's a choice now.
You do not have to lose your hair, okay?
You can take keeps.
You can do what I've been doing for the last 10 years.
You look at me.
I'm absolutely gorgeous out here with this full head of hair.
It's because I got ahead of it early on.
I was like, yo, I might be losing a little bit.
And I got on the pills that made the hair grow.
Okay.
I actually got growth back.
Okay.
You could do it with keeps.
This is that simple.
There's one way to tell if you're a dude and you are aging well, and that is if you have a full head of hair.
So you go to keeps.com, okay, slash flagrant.
Make sure it's slash flagrant.
Keeps.com/slash flagrant, and you will receive your first month of treatment for free.
That's K-E-E-P-S.com/slash flagrant.
I'm telling you, this is a no-brainer, okay?
You get ahead of it early, fellas.
Don't lie to yourself.
A lot of dudes lie to themselves, and then it's too late.
You don't want to be too late.
Get ahead of it early.
Keep that hair.
Now, let's get back to the show.
And back to the show.
A lot to talk about.
A lot to talk about, lots to talk about.
Street Fight Strategy Talk00:08:23
A lot of things have happened.
Where do we begin, man?
Where do you want to begin?
Topics?
Topics-wise.
We could talk about Jake Paul.
That's where I think we should start.
I feel like that's for you.
That brings all your worlds together.
Bro, how unplugged do you feel from the world?
We're this late?
Like, no, like, just after like the fucking past three weeks, four weeks?
Like, I don't even know anything that's happened.
I'm reading some of these stories.
I'm like, that happened?
Yeah.
Where was I?
I still don't know what date it is.
Yeah, that, dude.
I really don't.
I thought today was Saturday.
It's Wednesday.
I was working out today thinking it was Saturday.
But literally, the trainer goes, so are we going to see you guys Saturday?
And I'm like, like a week from now?
And he goes, no, that's like a few days from now.
And I was just like, nah, man, like, I got to play off that I'm that detached from the world.
But man, shit has been crazy.
Okay, so we can talk about Jake Paul.
We talk about Chappelle also.
Oh, yeah.
You got to talk about Logan Mayweather.
Logan Mayweather.
Yeah.
Let's talk about Jake.
Let's talk about Jake first and Jake and Nate Robinson.
I was very impressed with Jake.
Yeah.
The kid can actually box.
And this is what I've been trying to explain to a lot of motherfuckers.
In a boxing match, not a street fight.
You know who might win a street fight between Nate and Jake?
Nate.
He literally just, he might win that street fight.
In a street fight, you have two punches thrown.
and then people grab each other and then it becomes a wrestling match, generally speaking.
Right?
Because if you notice the beginning of the fight, a punch was thrown, then they're hugging each other.
The ref breaks it up.
Ain't no rep breaking you up in a street fight.
Once you're hugging somebody, it's who's got more brute strength or who's got more like wrestling or jiu-jitsu, that kind of shit and shit's going to the ground.
But a boxing match, whoever has more experience boxing is going to win that.
Okay.
Because a non-boxer usually can't throw a punch hard enough to concuss somebody.
And if they can, it's this big looping punch.
And anybody who's been in the ring is not getting caught by one of those punches.
The reason is boxing, when you're in a fight, right?
You're learning how to throw punches.
You're learning how to do all these things, but you're also learning how to be comfortable in a wildly uncomfortable situation.
It's a sauna, okay?
And the more comfortable you are in that situation, the more of an advantage, an extreme advantage that you have, right?
Nate was freaking out in there.
He didn't know what to fuck to do.
I actually think Nate got knocked out during sparring for preparation for the fight.
Because his confidence, that is the most confident athlete I've ever seen, Nate Robinson.
He's five foot nine and he was trying to dunk on NBA athletes.
Nobody.
He was afraid of nobody.
He thought on every team he was on, he should be taking every single shot.
And he walked into that ring terrified.
Even before he's like, I'm not just going to lay down.
I'm going to go out there and fight and say, why are you talking as if you're the underdog?
You're the athlete.
You're the dunk champion.
Everybody thinks you're going to win, but you're speaking as if you think you're going to lose.
He did lay down, though.
He lay down.
Fuck that.
Ready to throw.
But I he went in there.
He had a height disadvantage, had a reach disadvantage.
So he was probably looking at himself.
Also, like an experience.
He's had a height disadvantage, a reach disadvantage his entire life.
And he's looking at this kid like he's some Disney star.
And to be fair to Nate, there's no video outside the sparring footage that came out recently of Jake Paul doing anything that's like really damaging in the ring.
Then that sparring footage came out and the kid can fucking throw.
Like knockout power is knockout power.
He's not the same one who fought that KSI dude.
That's his brother.
That's the one who's fighting Paul Floyd Mayweather.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
So he's in there and boxing, again, like I'm saying, you are in an uncomfortable situation.
The more comfortable you can be in that situation, the greater advantage you have.
And to Jake's credit, he caught him all three times with step back overhand rights.
They're counter punches.
What happens when there's an unskilled boxer is you often like lunge at your opponent, right?
So what they'll teach you to do is take a quick step back and then throw off in a straight right.
But he threw this overhand right every single time, caught him.
That is a move of strategy and technique.
That's not luck.
And he caught him three times, same punch.
He knew exactly what he was doing.
He executed on it.
And you got to give credit to that motherfucker.
And I'll be honest, if I'm him, I'm calling out, and he kind of did this recently.
I'm calling out every, you have to call it specific genre of folks.
You have to call people who are famous enough to non-boxing fans, but not YouTubers.
Right.
If the fight is just on YouTube, Logan, Paul, KSI, the world doesn't care.
It will do great numbers.
People will be into it, but the world doesn't talk about it.
You go after an athlete or musician that are famous to the world.
And usually athlete, the only musicians you could really go after would have to be like super thug gangsters.
Yeah.
Because that's like you're testing their gangster in a way.
Like if you're going after John Mayer, no one's going to give a fuck.
Right.
But if you call out Antonio Brown, you know what I mean?
Athletes, you're always going to side with the athlete because you're like, well, they're an athlete.
They have this incredible athleticism.
Antonio Brown be hitting people too.
He got a history of abuse.
Antonio Brown's getting knocked the fuck out.
He's been getting knocked out for a while, too.
That's right.
That's not going to be the first time.
He's going to be laid down.
I'll say this.
He got so much CT he'll probably walk through a concussion like a zombie.
Like a fucking whitewater.
Just keep coming at you.
So I really think, I really think if Jake fights anybody who doesn't have any experience, specifically boxing, I think that he knocks him out or he at least beats them in potentially a boring fight.
As the guys that he's fighting gets taller, it's really harder to land that overhand right.
It's a tricky punch.
That's what I was wondering about height.
He has to keep short athletes.
That's why Antonio Brown is perfect.
Yeah.
If I'm him, I literally just prey on shorter athletes or gangster rappers.
Right.
And I would call out every single one.
Yeah.
Because if they don't respond, they look pussy.
Yeah.
Like it's this.
That's not true.
Well, here's the thing.
It's the 6'9 effect, but you could back it up.
Yeah.
Like 6'9 rose to fame by calling out the gangsters, saying he was more gangster.
And he had some hint songs as well.
But his whole MO was, who's the most gangster?
I'm a beef with them and show you that they're not going to do shit.
Right?
He can do that, but he can actually fight.
And there's no way Gucci Maine is going to fight him.
He might shoot him, but he's not going to fight him.
He could take his pick and call out any single dude.
And low-key, if they shoot Jake Paul instead of fight him, they pussy.
They are pussy.
Yeah.
That's the most pussy thing.
Now, now all of a sudden, that's what everybody was saying about when King Vaughn got shot.
Everybody was talking about, yo, that's soft.
Why you got to shoot the dude?
You're throwing a fair one with him.
Why don't you just shoot the fair one?
Yeah, I get what you're saying, but it's not pussy if you're calling out somebody like, yo, come into my sport and fight me.
But let's be clear.
Let's be clear here.
It's not a sport.
Yeah, he had Disney star, yo.
Floyd Mayweather was saying, they're literally both entertainers.
If Floyd Mayweather, right, said, come fight me, now that's crazy.
Gotcha.
But if an entertainer that's a Disney star that just picked up boxing a couple years ago, right, is going, yo, let's just box it out.
Yeah.
If you don't have some guy who raps and they got shot Andrew, they'd be like, you couldn't just fight Andrew?
And they'd be like, no, he's got boxing experience.
But I mean, years of training is still years of training.
Like, you see how pussy that's imagine your imagine you're a Gucci or you're, who's the most like dugged out rapper?
Let's say Gucci man.
Imagine Gucci said that.
It was like, well, you've been doing years of training.
Years of training is still years of training.
So I would say, let's have a street fight.
They should say, let's have a street fight.
And then if he shoots him during a street fight, then I would say that's pussy.
Yeah.
I agree with Alex.
It's pussy, yo.
No, if he said, let's have a street fight, that's the only count.
Let's have a street fight.
Hold on and say, what I would do is literally, again, you just use it for clout.
You call out the most badass dude, and then you just say, I want to box you.
And when they don't react, and you know the world is talking about it, and you can say, yo, no disrespect, but I want to box you.
And then if they don't react, they look pussy and you look.
Listen, if motherfuckers, let's say, who's a, if Rob Gronkowski calls me out and says, you want to box, I'm going to go, no.
I'm pussy if you're asking me to box, right?
Jet Ski Safety And Training00:03:21
Yeah.
That's it.
Simple as that.
Actually, I don't know if Robin Linkowski is nice at boxing, but that motherfucker is big.
Let me ask you a question.
If you called out Jay-Z, so it would be pussy if Jay-Z didn't respond to him.
Not because Jay-Z got tits.
Jay-Z's not pushing.
Nobody built worse than Jay-Z.
Puts a responsibility.
Jay-Z got better ticks than Beyonce, bro.
Jay-Z.
Has Jay-Z ever looked cool in a candid picture?
If he not posing for the picture, he looks ridiculous.
Son, is he human, Big Bird?
He got the skinny ass way.
He got the big ass.
He does, bro.
Now, be honest, yo.
Kanji clucking around.
Jay-Z, when he is in character, looks, is the coolest person on the planet.
You've never seen something so cool in your life.
And the reason he is that is because he is the most uncool person on the planet and learned how to be cool.
Trust me.
You hear his voice?
What?
Cracking this shit?
My brother is 60 years old.
Like, what about an elevator?
What about the elevator scene?
What about the elevator scene?
Did you know he wasn't on camera?
He was calm.
He was calm and cool.
Yeah, cool like that, like a synonym for calm.
He's 100% maybe the coolest guy on earth.
But in terms of like cool being like swag or whatever the fuck, no.
No.
Jay-Z.
I'm not saying I am.
Let me explain.
Let me explain.
I know how we want him to be the character that he portrays.
But when you see him on a jet ski with a helmet, I've got some reasonable doubt that he's a cool guy.
Because he's trying to be safe.
I got some reasonable doubt.
Safe isn't cool.
Hold on, Joe.
When has safety been cool?
Hey, let me put on this fucking life vest while I'm on a jet ski.
That's cool.
Come on now.
Motorcycles are cool because how safe they are.
Shit.
That's how it works.
Nah.
Raw sex ain't.
That's just Mike had a fucking Volvo, you would think he was cool.
There's airbags on all the doors.
He's swinging engineering.
Come on.
I'll say it in a way you'll understand.
That's just the next level of a Netflix special.
What's that?
You got a Netflix special and you stopped riding your bike because, oh my God, this is too dangerous.
So I got to take Ubers until this shit is done.
Now, times that by a billion, I got to put a helmet on on a jet ski now.
Give a context to that.
Give context to that.
You're not going to put it on.
Your point is valid.
I'm just saying people won't understand what you're saying.
So we were shooting a special, right?
Netflix had a Schultz special and we were, and we were, we got to be careful with our wording.
And I take a motorcycle to work every day.
Yep.
I take a motorcycle.
It's an electric motorcycle because I care about the environment.
I take it with pedals.
35 miles an hour, Max.
Exactly.
No, I mean, my shit goes 60 now.
So I'll come back.
You know what I'm saying?
Shout out to Huck.
I think so.
I got the Huck cycle, the big dog.
All right?
With the electric.
Okay.
I stopped taking the motorcycle to work every day because I didn't want y'all to miss out on the opportunity to work on a Netflix special.
Yes.
I mean, a Schultz special.
Yes.
Right.
No, no, in all seriousness.
I took, in all seriousness, I took the motorcycle to work today or every single day because I was like, God forbid I get in a fucking accident and then we can't shoot and pushes this day off.
Let me just take an Uber.
Yeah.
What you're saying is, and I'm agreeing with your point, you're saying is when you're with a billion dollars, you can't risk getting an injury on a fucking jet ski.
On a jet ski.
Electric Motorcycle And Balance00:03:41
Yeah.
I mean, if you get injured on a jet ski.
Can I ask you a question?
Son, you can get injured on a jet ski.
How do you get injured on his side?
It's water everywhere.
It's water.
You fall into the water, bro.
Son, there was times I was doing trying to do lifts and shit like that.
I mean, Jay-Z doing it.
Jay-Z not doing lifts, bro.
Let me ask you a helmet on, bro.
What is he hitting his head on in the water, bro?
Bro, he can't drown, bro.
His titties will make him float.
Yeah, he's so.
Yo, yo, that was Mark Gagos.
Let me ask you a question.
I got 99 problems in Puberty's one.
If Jay-Z wants to fight, we go on Triller, all right?
I'll fight him.
Pay-per-view.
Pay-per-view, baby.
Come on.
He used to do Tybo, son.
Now you on board.
Now you on board.
Using ether lines against the Tybo ho.
What were you going to say?
I was going to say, why can't you love him, but he not be the coolest guy on earth?
Yeah.
What's wrong with it?
I love Jay-Z, but I also understand.
I think he's a fucking genius.
I don't think he's the coolest guy.
We're going to start to realize.
What I think is cool about him is not the swag.
What I think is cool about his big business actors is a fucking genius that he's a fucking poet.
Like, that's what I think is cool about him.
What I'm trying to say is what I think people start to learn is like, especially you've seen this even within the industry.
The people that success that are successful in entertainment for a long time are not the cool motherfuckers.
They're the people who learn how to use that, right?
The ones who are like the real cool guys, the ones who are legit and the anti-all this other shit, they're back in jail.
What about Snoop?
Or they get drug addictions.
That's because they are in rehab.
James Dean, yeah.
I feel like the essence of cool is sometimes the opposite.
Yeah, no, I was for fucking.
Yeah, you really pulled the FA right there.
Everything cool.
Why did I fuck for fuck?
I don't know.
I'm kind of cold right now.
Everything all right over there, Mark?
I don't know.
What is there?
Fucking Obama over here stuttering.
Damn, I'm taking shots at all his heroes.
What's going on?
Y'all killed that for me.
I did not realize he had to stutter out.
I did not know that Obama should have stutter.
I thought he was just.
I thought he just thought.
He didn't have a stutter, though.
I think he had to stop.
It's not a stutter.
I don't think he had to overthink everything because he was getting crucified for every word he said.
That's what I'm saying.
So he would like think things through.
But no, his inauguration speech in 08, that shit was amazing.
Pre-written, bro.
How are you going to stutter on a pre-written thing?
No stutter than that.
You guys, he started stuttering more as he was president for longer.
You guys are not doing the definition of stuttering, right?
What's that?
What the fuck did you just say?
You just stutter when you said it.
That was not.
That's not a bad thing.
Say one thing about Obama, man.
The gob.
He is the god.
I have two things, though.
What's that?
Snoop Dogg, he's cool, right?
What are you talking about?
We're going back to the bottom.
That's a valid.
That's a good idea.
That's valid.
Snoop is cool.
Snoop is a cool.
Hold on.
I just want to say one thing about Snoop.
What's up?
Say something about myself.
Not only is he, not only is he cool, that motherfucker is comedian-level funny.
Yes, he's funny.
I did not think he was funny until I saw him host the Jake Paul.
It's not even the Jake Paul fight.
Isn't that crazy?
We call it the Jake Paul.
It was the Tyson Roy Jones fight.
Oh, my God.
But I did not think he's funny.
He is absolutely cool.
Okay.
That being said, he had like a spiritual advisor that was a pimp for a while or something.
Remember, Dawn Magic Wand?
He had Don Magic Wand.
He was his spiritual advisor.
I smoked with him.
You slept with him?
Smoked with him.
Oh my god.
Oh my gosh.
You smoked with Snoop?
I have video.
Really?
I never showed you it?
Damn.
No, no, Snoop is that dude, bro.
Snoop really is that dude, man.
I think there's something to what you were saying.
Snoop Dogg Comedy Moments00:03:25
Like, it's hard to be cool and successful.
Yes.
Like, to be truly cool to be truly successful.
Because I feel like being cool is the opposite of successful a lot of times.
You know what I mean?
I know where you're going with it, but just like, to me, someone that's cool is like, oh, I don't really care.
Yes.
You know what I mean?
I have not a care in the world.
I'm chill all the time.
Nothing bothers me.
I don't give a fuck about nothing.
And to be successful, you have to give a fuck.
You have to care.
It's hard to not give a fuck and still get the things that giving a fuck gets you.
Yes.
So finding a balance between that or finding a way to like tap into things that are cool, but don't remove you from giving a fuck.
Because anybody in this business gives a fuck.
You know, we could act like these people out here.
Like, oh, I don't care about acting or I don't care about any of these things.
You know, the reality is, you gotta hear it to me.
The reality is, is you're still in the business.
Like, all these people who complain about it, right?
But then they still do it.
Shut the fuck up.
Yeah.
You want to beat it.
You go into the audition.
You got deadlines?
Yeah.
You got a big.
I mean, I don't.
You get it when you get it, bro.
I told Mark one day when you were having your big freak out.
Oh my gosh.
I was like, yo, the deadline's coming up.
Everything's keep going.
Everything's cool.
What are we going to do?
Everything's behind.
We got to catch up.
We had to deliver three episodes one day at eight o'clock.
Right?
And like they gave a strict deadline to say, yo, by this time, this time, this time I said, Mark is terrified.
Dub is terrified.
I said, all right, we're going to get it by those times.
So I'm staying up all night, working hard, trying to get it done on time.
And then Andrew walks in, you know, 10 o'clock, feeling cool.
And I go, Hey, Andrew, like, I didn't really sleep last night, but like, we're still behind on this.
I don't know what to do.
Like, what should we do?
Because I don't know about the deadline.
And he just looks at me and goes, hey, Mark.
No, no, This is not how it went.
This is, you annoyed me five different times already.
This is you just fucking yapping to say the well, what if we don't get it?
I was cold, okay?
My fellow Americans.
He kept going, but what if we don't get it?
What's going on?
What are we going to do?
He was stressed.
Stressing.
And by the fifth time, I just had enough.
And I just said, when do you want to?
What did I say?
Oh, no.
I was going to say the other one you said.
What did I say?
Because I did ask you five times.
The first time you just go, hey, Mark, we got the meats.
I was like, what are you talking about?
He goes, yo, they want the meats.
We got the meats.
I was like, how does that help me?
We got the meats.
If you want the meats, you know what I'm saying?
You got to go to the butcher.
We're the butcher.
Cobra Kai season three ain't out yet.
He's about to be, bro.
And then he comes.
Then he comes back and he comes to me.
He's like, Yo, when do you want to turn it in?
He's like, Friday, Saturday.
Matter of fact, take Sunday.
We're turning it in Sunday.
That's it.
We're turning in Sunday.
That's ill.
That's ill.
That was so.
And I'm just laughing.
Me and Mark inside, we can't really react, but we're like dying inside because it's due that day.
And I know, I didn't think he was actually going to be able to pull this shit up.
So he was like, yo, let's just take five minutes, go off to the roof or some shit like that.
I'm like, yeah, we played soccer on the roof.
If you don't get this shit approved and we just wasted a half hour playing soccer on the roof, I was going to be pissed.
So I get a call from Netflix like an hour later.
And after that call, I came into the room.
I was like, can we do it by Saturday?
Bro, literally, we're on the roof playing soccer.
I thought y'all needed some soccer.
Roof Soccer And Immunity Tips00:02:16
We come down.
We get a stressing.
We get an email from production.
They go, okay, moving the release date will be catastrophic for the schedule.
Catastrophic is the word.
What does that mean?
Realistic.
I moved it two days, though.
It wasn't catastrophic.
We got to do it.
It was catastrophic.
You know, it's catastrophic getting COVID in the middle of a fucking production.
I'm saying the catastrophe has happened.
Two-week quarantine pushes it two days.
That ain't bad.
Mark, that was your problem.
You were reading those emails.
Yeah, he would read every fucking email instead of editing.
That's why it took so fucking long.
You don't know how to read them.
Dove will tell you the important ones.
Yeah, when I see Dub over there, just snorting, bro.
When he starts snorting it up, you know it's a problem, bro.
When that snort comes out in his breathing, that deviated septum.
When that septum starts deviating, bro, oh, we got a deadline ahead.
I'm trying to think when Dub got the most stressed.
Why are you?
Wait, you snooze.
What?
No, no, no.
We just call him our truckle pig.
All right, guys.
We're going to take a break for a second because I'm tired of you wasting days.
We're not going to waste any more days.
We're going to be out there drinking sometimes.
We're going to out there, have a few with the boys, have a few with the ladies.
Maybe we're out there trying to get laid, and there's no need for a wasted day the next day.
And the way that we do that is DHM detox.
Now, I can get into all the science of how this works, but it basically is breaking down the chemicals in your body that are built up by drinking alcohol.
I'm not a scientist.
I just read that that's how it works, but I tried it.
Okay.
I'm out there.
I take a couple of pills when I have my first drink.
I take a couple of pills before I go to sleep.
And simple as that, I'm not wasting days.
That is all that this takes.
This is an absolute no-brainer.
If you want to not waste any more days, what you do is you go to no dayswasted.co.
All right.
You use the promo code Flagrant30.
You're getting 30% off your order, 30% off your order, and that's not it.
If it doesn't work for you, if it's not satisfactory, guess what else you get?
Your money back.
Do I have to say anything else?
Go right now.
No dayswasted.co.
Make sure you use Flagrant30 to get 30% off because they know it's going to be so good.
You would never ask for it back.
No Days Wasted Promo Code00:13:39
Now let's get back to the show.
All right, guys, let's take a break right quick.
And I'm the perfect guy to tell you to get your immunity up.
Let me tell you something.
This corona shit is real.
I don't care what anybody tells you.
It's cold season, it's flu season.
You're probably going to get sick with something, but you can help prevent that or at least make the symptoms milder if you get your immunity up.
And that's where Narivo immunity boost gummies come in.
Guys, they have vitamin C, zinc, elderberry, everything that's important to keep you healthy, to keep you from getting too sick.
It's in these gummies.
There's no foolproof protection against the coronavirus, but experts do recommend vitamin C, vitamin C, zinc, and elderberry to get your immunity up.
So guys, take these gummies.
They are made in the USA.
They're vegan.
They're non-GMO, all that good shit.
All you got to do is go to naravo.co.
That's n-a-r-i-v-o.co.
You get 20% off your one-time purchase.
You get 50% off if you make if you subscribe.
Sorry, I do that again.
You will get 20% off your one-time purchase.
You will get 50% off when you subscribe.
And you will get an additional 10% off your order with the code Flagrant.
Guys, we're giving you all kinds of savings.
These are important gummies.
I was not taking them.
I got Corona.
That's all I'm saying.
So go to N-A-R-I-V-O.co.
Get your immunity up.
Now let's get back to the show.
So yeah, man.
Back to the fight.
Close out the fight.
Oh, yeah, we got to close out the fight.
Oh, yeah, what do you think of Tyson?
That's what I want to ask you.
I mean, it was just great to see them both in there.
And I just love Tyson.
He's just such a...
I think Tyson is about to.
Yeah, I mean, I kind of had a feeling it was going to go that way.
I was like, if he doesn't connect, connect, he's not going to like outbox Roy.
Yeah.
You know, and but Roy's chin is unfortunately now at this stage of his career, not what it used to be.
And I thought he was going to connect.
He didn't connect.
And yeah, it was fine.
You see the post-game interview where Jim Gray asked Roy how he was doing and then Mike was like, well, I'm doing it.
Yeah, I'm doing it.
And he seemed legit angry.
How playful was it?
How angry was he?
He wasn't angry, but it was interesting because Roy did have a fight within the last few years.
And Tyson's like, I haven't fought in 15 years.
But that's how much, that's like the esteem that we give Mike Tyson.
We're literally like, you're such a badass motherfucker.
Yo, we're asking Roy, how was it to fight Tyson?
Exactly.
Yeah.
And the thing about Tyson is like, it's really a testament to like people who drill well.
And by drill, I mean like just do repetitive movements.
Like if you looked at Tyson, it was slower, but he didn't look that different boxing.
Did you notice that?
Like his movements in the ring were quite similar to what we expected from him.
And that's what happens when you're fucking 14 years old or whatever.
Super soldier.
And you just been doing it the same thing over and over.
That shit sticks to you.
Riding a bike, 100%.
Yo, hot take.
Go.
If you rewatch that fight, count punches landed.
Oh, Roy wins?
Roy wins that fight.
Some people think that's what I'm saying.
Thank you.
Roy wins that fight.
He won.
And he was trying to win off points.
Yeah.
That's what I thought.
That's the only way you can win that fight because you can't even knock each other out.
Yeah.
Because even though Tyson was hitting him much harder and hitting them more, they were all being blocked.
Yeah, maybe he got some body shots in there, but you're right.
Yeah, you're right.
It's true.
It is interesting.
Thank you for saying that.
Yeah.
I mean, I just, yeah, Roy's just so great.
But it was great to see them back in there.
I don't know.
It's like, it's the least you could do.
I think Charlotte put on his caption and that shit really resonated with me.
But he was like, the amount of joy these guys have given me in my life, just watching them both fight, giving them $50 couldn't even compare.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Like, I was so happy to give them $50.
Like, yeah.
That's a donation.
It's a tax write-off.
That's a charitable contribution.
Real talk, man.
I mean, they, yeah.
I was happy to see Mike get a million.
Just like, yo, go, bro.
Yeah.
Take it.
Everybody took from you.
Now you can take from everybody a little bit.
Yeah.
So what do you think happens with this Logan Paul Mayweather thing?
Well, first of all, do you think Mayweather thinks he's fighting Jake?
I genuinely do.
I thought so.
Like, as I'm getting older, all white people are starting to become the same.
Yeah.
Why is that?
I don't know.
It's like I'm actually having a harder time distinguishing white people.
Yeah.
So now I get it.
Yeah.
So I had 10 years and severe brain damage.
Then imagine how long it is.
So I do think he thought he's fighting the guy who just fought Nate.
You really think so?
I think so.
He's like, oh, someone in his team.
Yeah, he's got to have someone in his team, though, dude.
Why would he take this fight?
It makes more sense that Jake would fight him now because Jake has all the heat, though.
Maybe they're trying to do like a brother combo thing.
You know, I mean, I don't know, dude.
I hit up Logan.
I was like, bro, are you fucking?
This is crazy.
I was like, I don't know how you're going to spend this because they're going to try to turn it into some race war.
If the fight is in February, it's during Black History Month.
You are like the quintessential white boy.
That conversation happened with like Jake and maybe Jake didn't want to take the fight because he's like, I'm too easily vilifiable or whatever.
Whereas Logan, from what I understand, is like, he's the clean-cut all-American.
It's harder to find the dirt on him.
You're fighting him in Black History Month and Jake.
Well, Logan got dirt, though.
Logan got the suicide shit.
But against black people, he got dirt.
No, no, no.
So if you're fighting him during Black History Month, Floyd don't care about anybody but black people.
He's pretty clear about that.
Jake, it seems like it'd be easier to make him a villain.
And Jake is probably like, look, I don't want it.
Well, that's what I told him.
I was like, yo, you can make tons of money if you lean into that.
But you're just going to, it's going to be horrible for your everyday life.
Yeah, it's at the expense of all your other money in life.
But you could probably, like, he could probably have a cash out fight.
Like, literally, you get 50 mil or something crazy if he just leans into like not MAGA, but you get close.
And then you make it like this white versus black thing.
I think if you look up the highest-grossing fight in history, I think it's, I think it's, oh, actually, now it's all changed because of pay-per-view numbers and all that kind of stuff.
But I think it was like, it was like Muhammad Ali versus some like white dude.
Like there was some like racial tension attached to it.
Or maybe it was Mike Tyson versus some white guy.
Do you know this?
I'm looking up some now.
Was that guy's Peter McNeely or whatever the fuck that he knocked out in 60 seconds?
Was it that quick?
Yeah.
I don't remember that.
Three minutes something.
Point is you can make the most money there, but I don't think that's the right thing to do for him brand wise.
But then again, you have to think about how the fuck can you get people to think you have a chance?
In order for them to buy the fight, they either want to see you get your ass handed to you, like get your ass beat, or they got to think you have a chance.
So how do you convince them to think you have a fucking chance against the greatest great of all time?
I don't know, though, because I could see people wanting to sign up just to see him get knocked out.
Like if you're like, if you don't like him or if you're someone that like goes at him, I think I could see you being like.
That's option one of what I was saying.
But if you want to profit the most off of that, you make everybody hate you.
Logan's a likable guy.
Like I think most people like him.
Most people are into his stuff and they like find the things that he do does like funny and interesting.
Right.
Like he's not a villain character.
Where I think Jake, you could say that he might be a villain character.
There are people that are like pushing back.
You're nodding your head.
But if you have the most listened to podcast in the world, people don't hate listening for two hours.
Right.
So like if you're listening, it's because they fuck with you.
Right.
If you are an Instagram comedian, there are motherfuckers that could just literally watch it to be like, look how fucking stupid these people are.
Or a bunch of like these girls who like post sexy pictures, whatever, like that.
They're not like fans.
It's like nice to look at something naked, bro.
But I think that he has legit fans.
What I'm saying is, if he wants to maximize, you basically become the heel.
Oh.
You know what I mean?
Like, you go Kobe Covington, essentially.
That's what Floyd did initially to sell fights.
I think you literally do the Floyd technique.
It's like Floyd is literally wearing sombrero into the ring because he wants every Mexican that exists to go, I want this Mexican fighter to beat the shit out of this black guy.
He does it on Cinco de Mayo, fighting Oscar de la Joya.
Like, he knows what he's doing.
Floyd only fought on Single de Mayo, dude.
It was amazing.
And then, like, Bernard Hopkins goes to Puerto Rico, takes the Puerto Rican flag, rips it in half, and like steps on it when he was fighting Tito Trinidad.
Do you remember that?
And then, of course, every Puerto Rican is like, I want you to beat the shit out of this guy.
Like, creating that kind of tension, that like race war is always going to drive up a fight.
Yeah.
I just don't know how the fuck anybody thinks that Logan could have a chance.
He's got to release sparring footage where he's actually knocking people out.
Like, he's got to build up this ability that he could actually fight.
What's his size?
He's way bigger than Floyd.
He's 200 pounds.
And he's solid.
The kid is solid and shredded.
Six feet, maybe 6'1, 200 fucking pounds.
Floyd is 150 pounds, 160 pounds, probably.
So that's his chance right there.
You can't hit him.
You can't hit the guy.
You can't hit him.
I wonder if there's something with this.
Have you ever played basketball against someone that sucks it?
Actually, me, probably.
If, like, you've ever played a sport against someone that you're good at that they're terrible at?
Yep.
There's almost like a weird like advantage because, like, I don't know, like, I've played soccer as people that have never played.
And if you try to do like a fake, you expect them to move.
That way, you can fake back.
But then sometimes you'll play someone that doesn't move, so you'll fake and then you'll fake back into where they go.
Sorry to interrupt, but to this point, I thought, and you said it was head movement, but maybe there's something to this.
I'll ask again.
When Floyd fought Connor, it took him a few rounds to get to get the upper hand.
For the first few rounds, it was like, this is crazy.
This is not like a clear-cut Floyd victory.
He just carried him.
And I thought maybe Connor was so unorthodox that it was throwing off Floyd.
Nah, he just carried him.
There's no lucky punch, you'd think.
And even if he landed a lucky punch, Logan can't hit harder than the hardest person that's hit Floyd.
Because even if you're 200 pounds, you don't have the power and precision of a 154-pound fighter.
Like Oscar De La Joya's hook is harder than Logan's.
Yeah, probably.
You know what I mean?
So it's like, and I know what you're saying, and that's about someone who's really unskilled at soccer or really unskilled at basketball or whatever.
But with boxing, Logan's skilled.
Logan's had fights.
He actually knows the technique.
He knows what he's doing in there.
You know what I mean?
He's not just going to go swing wild.
It's tricky.
So we got to devise a way to build this fight up because I want it to be exciting.
Mayweather is good at defending himself, though.
That's another thing.
It's like, if it'd be another thing if you were going in there with a banger, like you're going there with a boxer that's known for just like a complete slug fest, right?
Then you got a puncher's chance maybe because he's going to engage.
You can't hit Floyd.
Exactly.
The greatest fighters in history can't hit Floyd.
It might have been he's the greatest at he's the greatest great of all time.
Meaning he's greater at boxing than Bill Gates is at tech.
He's greater at boxing than Gretzky at hockey.
Gretzky at hockey.
He's the greatest great.
You can't hit him.
I don't care if he's 43.
He's going to look a little pussy if he gets in there with a non-professional and he's running.
But here's the thing: towards the end of his career, he wouldn't run.
He'd stand right in front of you and just use amazing headphones, that little shoulder roll, remember?
Right.
Now, is it possible Logan can win without winning?
So that's the other thing I was thinking, right?
It's like, how do you, how do we create, okay, he can win without winning, but I don't know if that sells tickets.
So, in other words, if he finds a way to go the distance with Floyd, right?
People will go, wow, he actually went the distance with Floyd.
Floyd didn't get him out of here, but you're not selling the tickets.
And who gives a fuck about a moral victory when you're in there getting your ass kicked?
Right.
But is there rematch money in it?
Is there like some type of like, can he make a prediction that he can't come through on?
Like, yo, I'm going to stick you in the fifth or whatever.
Like, it's so tricky.
It's so tricky.
Because what is he going to say?
I'm going to land one punch.
Yeah, I guess.
Honestly, Floyd, if he really wants to sell this fight, he's got to say he's not going to land a single punch.
So you create, that's a good point.
You create the expectation of not victory.
We're not, we know who's going to win.
But how do I shift what a win is?
Right.
Yeah.
Like, if you're playing basketball, it's like against someone amazing, like, oh, I won't beat you, but yo, I'm going to break your ankles.
And you knock him down.
It's like, oh, yeah, he did what he said he was going to do.
Look at Jay Williams.
Yeah.
I beat Jay Williams because of what he decided was the competition.
Right.
So technically, Floyd could create a competition where Logan could win, at least in the eyes of the people.
Everybody listening to this podcast right now knows I bust Jay Williams' ass, even though he bust my ass.
It was 6-1, but it wasn't.
It was 7-6.
So that's what they got to create.
I don't know how you create that within boxing.
Maybe it's just expectation base, but like, if that's if Floyd is out there going, not only am I going to bust his ass, he's not going to land a single punch on me the entire fight.
What if Floyd commits to not training?
Honestly, I don't think it makes a difference.
Really?
I think he's just, I think it's like Floyd always trains boxing.
And don't you think it's like muscle memory?
It's like you've been doing that since you're four years old.
Yeah.
He could not train.
Like it'd just be so, I think it'd just be so easy for him.
The skill margin is just so much.
It's so much.
It's so much.
But we'll see.
We're going to find a way to sell it.
I want to get, I want to, I want to help Logan.
I want to help him get crazy interest in this fight above just I want to see Logan beat up.
Like I want the general public to be like, nah, this is going to be interesting for this reason.
I just don't know what that fucking means.
Something that you brought up before that's also cool is assuming that like the fight ends, Logan loses, there is that like vengeance, that vengeance fight for Jake.
Muscle Memory And Skill Margins00:04:33
Yeah.
I mean, they'd be really smart if Jake fought KSI and then maybe Jake fucks up KSI.
Is Jake nicer than Logan?
That recency bias shit is so real when it comes to fighting.
Yeah, and he won.
Yeah, so it's like a knockout is just so it's yeah, it's just so hard, man.
Whenever you see someone knocked out, especially in that fashion, you're like, yo, that motherfucker is nice.
Demands respect regardless.
100%.
So it's like, I don't know who's better.
I really got to see them both.
I really got to see them both.
I don't know.
I don't know.
To that end, while we're talking about the Paul Brothers, do you want to talk about Jamil Hill and Jake Paul?
They asked a joking question.
Like Jamila Hill asked this joking-ass question when she was interviewing Jake.
She's like, Was it racist that you knocked him out?
Now, she asked it.
She's kidding.
That's what I was noticing.
So is Carrie Champion.
They're both kidding because Carrie followed up with the same question.
Okay, because I thought she got when she was like, why is that a stupid question?
When Jake Paul is clearly annoyed, I was like, she's either trolling him, which is odd and seems out of character for her, or she's getting a little annoyed that he's getting annoyed and she was like going to make it a real thing now.
Yeah.
The thing is, like, I don't know if Jamila Hill has the equity built up to ask a question like that as a joke because that's literally what she does for a living.
Yeah.
Is kind of ask those questions.
Like she wakes up in the morning and then she's like, it's racist today.
Where's it at?
You know what I mean?
So why is it racist?
It's cold out in summer.
Is that ever seen the guys on the beach with the thing and the headphones and that metal detector?
She got the racing.
She's a racism detector on Twitter all the time.
So that's her thing.
And I get it, man.
It's like you lean into what pays the bills.
And I'm sure she achieved a lot of success leaning into that.
But eventually you got to be careful that you don't become a caricature of yourself.
In order to keep your audience honest, it's important to challenge them.
At least that's what I think.
So, because if you don't, then you're just kind of caught up in this positive feedback loop, but you have to go more and more extreme in order to get that same reaction.
Right.
So, it's like, oh, okay, so we called this racist.
Well, I've already done that.
What's not racist, but is so?
I thought this was her kind of trying to pivot out of becoming that caricature.
Yeah.
And people weren't having it.
They were just like, no, she's got to be serious.
This is Jamil Hill.
Yeah.
I know she's joking.
Yeah.
But this is what you do.
So now all of a sudden you're a comedian.
Yeah.
It's and also it's corny.
Boy, you cried wolf.
Yeah, that's it.
That is it.
It was just corny, bro.
It's like, I was like, clearly, he got called.
I'm sorry to interrupt, but like Nate called out Jake.
If Jake was out there calling out Nate and he was like, I'm going to beat your black ass and all this other shit.
It's like he tried to make it a little racist in some way, sure.
But like, you're literally only saying this because the kid's white.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I thought he handled it well, too.
He's like, come on.
Yeah.
What are you doing?
Yeah.
You should have said, yeah, it's racist.
It's racist.
The black guy asked if he could beat the shit out of me and I decided to defend myself.
Yeah.
So yeah, he is racist.
Nate Robinson is racist.
If Nate Robinson liked black people more, he wouldn't have gotten slept.
Like, that's super racist for him not to fight for y'all.
He let us down, son.
Did you feel let down?
Really?
Really?
Like, at least put up somewhat of a fight.
I don't know.
He was just running in there.
Are you heads down?
Like, headfirst.
Are you aware how much black people think they can beat up every white person?
Is that a thing you're aware of?
Is that true?
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah, living with black people.
Why do you think I could beat you in a race?
They really don't think there's a single white person on earth they couldn't beat up.
Why have things worked out the way they have?
Is this a new phenomenon?
What's going on?
Is that for real?
It's a real thing.
Really?
It's a real thing.
Yeah.
That's fascinating.
Yeah.
Are you reevaluating your whole life?
It's like astonishing to me.
My old roommate, he was a big dude, but he was legit.
Like, I could take like five or six of them.
Like, the way I talk about fighting like nine-year-olds.
Yeah.
That's how he talked about fighting white people his own age.
I never thought it was that.
I thought that there were like white people that are just afraid of black people because they have like a bigoted view of black people, right?
So like there are white people that just wouldn't fight a black guy because of their own bigotry.
Yeah.
Right.
But I never knew black people just thought they could beat up every white guy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like dancing.
Yeah.
Interesting.
Like the dancing, I believe, that's the difference we think we have.
Interesting.
And what did this fight do to that?
You think?
I mean, Nate could get him.
Running back?
Election Trends And Insurance Advice00:06:03
Yeah, you got to run it back.
It's like, if I'm Nate, I'm running it back.
He's been training for a year.
He got to.
Yeah.
And Nate is an athlete, so he can pick shit up.
Killed his reputation.
Yeah, Nate got to run it.
He rolled with it, though.
He leaned into the jokes.
He had his fun.
Was just like back on Twitter taking it.
I would have been in fucking hiding.
Yeah, he said something on Instagram the next day that was just like acknowledging.
You've been in hiding for real?
Yeah, bro.
I'd have been quarantined again.
Yeah, you'd have to be in a dark room for probably six or seven days.
Yeah.
Tushing like that.
Just in general.
Wait till symptoms go away before you come back outside.
10 days.
I'm surprised, actually.
Oh, boy.
Okay, what else we got going on, guys?
What else is happening?
Matthew McConaughey called out the liberals.
Keep scrolling if you want to.
What's Matthew McConney up to?
Is he trying to podcast or something?
I think he wants to get into politics.
Yeah, there's something.
He's pivoting.
Did he say he's going to try to run for something?
He's doing politics.
I knew there's something.
He might try to run for Texas governor.
That's what it was.
A brilliant way to get votes in Texas.
To call out.
Yeah.
And to say, he says, I'm aggressively centrist.
That's a term he uses.
And then he called out, you guys don't know, he called out basically Hollywood liberals who are making fun of Republicans who won't accept the election results.
And he's like, I saw you, this exact person, liberal person, do this when Trump won.
Now all of a sudden, Republicans are doing it and they're idiots.
And you're so condescending and arrogant about it.
All the shit we've been saying, to be honest.
But it's also kind of nice to watch a Hollywood elite call out Hollywood elites.
You know what I mean?
And it's like a good sign that this is all kind of like, all right, this thing, we're calling it out.
Yeah, he's making a move.
Man, I don't know what's going to happen to Hollywood, bro.
Like, I think that shit.
It's moving Austin, buddy.
Yeah, low-key.
Elon Musk is coming.
Yo, yo, a lot of people.
A lot of people are coming.
Let me just.
Silicon Valley on its way.
Goldman is moving to where, Duff?
Florida, bro.
They're all moving to the red states.
Goldman?
Goldman Sachs.
Nada, sorry.
Goldman Sachs.
That's just like California's GDP is always so high or whatever.
I don't think it's, it's about to plummet.
I think slowly.
Like, big dogs are just going to keep moving.
Why would you pay those taxes?
And Austin is the perfect place because they have mostly liberal ideals, but you don't pay taxes.
Yeah, it's everything they want.
Do you think that shifts the political paradigm in those liberal places?
You see everyone leaving, they go, all right, we got to pull this shit back.
And then all of a sudden in like California, New York, people are starting to go, well, shit, I guess we got to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps.
Nobody's bailing us out.
We've got to figure it out ourselves.
What if there's this massive flip?
That's what I'm saying.
Everyone wants to live in Republican states.
Nobody does?
Well, everyone does.
Everybody does.
But I'm saying, is California going to turn?
Yeah.
That is interesting.
If you're like a California Republican nominee or whatever, I feel like this is your best chance.
You know what I mean?
Oh, to go for a political.
If you're running for Senate or something in California and you're Republican, you're like, yo, I'm not what's ruining it, what's moving everyone out.
There's something that happened within this election.
I think people have spoken about this before, but like Trump lost, but Trump policy didn't.
A lot of people became open-minded about conservativeism.
And I think that this was the first time that it all of a sudden became relatable.
Trump was so polarizing.
Trump was so divisive that they were kind of grossed out by Trump, the figure.
But I think a lot of liberals were just exhausted by the Nancy Pelosis of the world and these full-life politicians that just absolutely suck and they're just mucking about with this system.
It seems like they're kind of like using it for their own personal benefit or party benefit rather.
And I think they became a little disenfranchised with the left, man.
And I would not be surprised if you see in the next few, like, what is it called?
The midterm elections, I believe it's called.
I would not be surprised if you see people start leaning right, man.
Leaning right.
Especially now that the president isn't right.
So there's going to be a correction because of that, right?
There's going to be this like reaction.
They didn't get their way, so they're going to lean super hard and try to flip.
Biden is an indication of that, that he's kind of a moderate.
I mean, he's much more of a lifetime politician, but he's kind of a moderate Democrat.
That's the thing, bro.
It's a rejection of the Bernie shit.
Yeah.
Right?
Like, and I fucks with Bernie, but it's a rejection of like the AOCs.
It's a rejection of the squad.
Like, even Democrats were like, nah, this is not the thing that we like.
I think we think Democrats are just New York and just LA.
And Democrats are also the ones that get you elected.
They're in the middle of the country.
And the middle of the country is only so left-wing.
They're not coastal.
Where it's like, yeah, AOC is everything.
That's perfect.
She's perfect.
They're like, nah, she's a little crazy.
But I generally agree with the left more than the right.
That's a middle America Democrat.
Joe Biden, hey, I'm not here trying to fucking defund the police completely or whatever.
I just want police to be a little better.
And that's how Middle America feels, regardless of how we feel.
That's how I think a lot of middle America feels.
All right, guys, we're going to take a break real quick to save you some money.
That's what I do as an Indian, okay?
I spread corona.
I save you money.
Guys, it's a pandemic.
It's the holiday season.
You got to buy gifts.
Nobody cares that you're probably not making money because of the pandemic.
So what do you do?
You save money.
And one of the best places you can save money is insurance.
And that's where we're going to help you.
Go to policygenius.
That's policygenius.com.
And they will save you on average $1,000 a year.
And it's really easy to use.
You just answer a couple quick questions about yourself, your property.
Then Policy Genius does everything else.
They compare rates from over 30 different insurers.
They have experts find you the ones the best for you, build the policy, and then they help you switch over.
Have 1,600 five-star reviews on TrustPilot on Google.
That's where we all go to make sure something is good.
We're doing the work for you, guys.
Go to policygenius.com and save an average of $1,000 per year.
Guys, when it comes to insurance, just get it right.
Policy Genius Savings Guide00:14:43
Now let's get back to the show.
Move on.
Let's move on.
Yeah.
Oh, there was a lot of basketball news.
Have you been keeping up with that?
Man, I haven't kept up with shit.
I literally feel so detached from everything.
What basketball news?
A little bit, yeah.
I was in my room for a couple of weeks.
So I had nothing to do but follow sports.
Why would you?
Yo, before we, I'm sorry, before we talk about sports, can I just bring up one headline?
Did y'all hear about this aliens hiding?
That's what I was, yeah.
Okay.
Oh, that's on the list.
Yeah, there are aliens.
Is that the Israeli thing?
Yes.
Yeah, bro.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Aliens are hiding until humans are ready.
Aliens are mad pussy, bruh.
That's pippin behavior.
That's pippin behavior.
I'm not going in the game.
Come on.
I'm not going in.
How are you going to just be at Mars and just be like, you went intergalactic travel and you're not going to go there?
If you go to Orlando, bro, you got to go to Universal.
You got to go to Harry Potter's.
Also, how does that motherfucker know?
They talked to him and they were like, he was like, yo, when you come in, they're like, Dove, you might want to speak on this.
You're one of them.
I'm an alien too.
No, I'm talking about Jews.
Oh.
No, but for real, like, what the fuck, dude?
Why is it?
I don't know.
I saw that title.
I think that aliens are supposed to be this, like, what they put on the movies, though.
Well, if they're not, then how do we know that they are anything?
And also, what are they eating?
They could be like the aliens and men in black.
Yeah, but those aliens need to eat, right?
What are they consuming?
What are they able to eat?
There's no food on any waste.
What waste?
The trash that we throw in the dumps and all that stuff.
You can't grab an empty can of Pringles in the fucking middle of the space down.
How do you know they have to eat?
They have to eat.
Maybe they're eating the aliens.
They're in Israel.
Yeah.
That's why the guy knew it's a land that's kind of, you know, unto itself, just waiting for people to be ready for them.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, wandering around space for 40 years, maybe.
I don't get why this shit made that, made the news.
Like, why?
Who is this guy?
It's like just some random motherfucker who just says, oh, aliens like weed.
He was with like the massage.
He was like, he was Israeli intelligence.
But he just says some shit with no proof.
Also, the other thing about this, show me something.
He has a book.
He has a book out right now.
Oh, fuck this guy.
Come on, Saul.
I'm not claiming him.
Oh, Dub says, oh, Dub don't believe him.
Wow.
That shit ain't real, dog.
Last guy who wrote about aliens and all of that.
But you don't believe that aliens are real?
Yeah.
Oh, we got a truffle scuffle.
You don't think that aliens are real?
You don't think aliens are real?
Not in the way that we portray them.
I think that there's some type of organisms floating around.
You think that we're the only person who's too much conversation with someone who doesn't know?
Sorry, sorry.
Nobody can hear them.
Don't you produce podcasts?
Do you believe in aliens?
I do.
In what way?
I don't know.
I just, that same thing of like, there's no way this is the only planet that has life on it.
Exactly.
I don't know what they look like or whatever.
What do you think they look like?
Gay people, probably.
Like, mad well-dressed, mad well-boomed.
In great shape, you know what I mean?
You know, just like superior in every way.
I mean, I want to fuck all of them.
I said something.
I can't fuck it up again.
Yo, what if we have you know what's interesting about aliens specifically is that like you know that white people invented the the way that they look now because none of them got fat asses.
Oh, that's true.
They got no ass big head and then just legs that come out of hips.
Yeah, isn't that interesting?
Like, there's no fat ass alien.
I'm telling you, I'm an alien.
You're not believing me.
No, I don't believe that.
Thank you so much for hiring Taylor.
Yo, hold on.
I got okay.
She might be an alien.
You know what she said to me earlier today?
Something's on that screen now.
Don't scare me.
She goes, Taylor goes to me.
She goes, Yo, I don't believe in tunnels.
I did not say that.
No, I didn't.
I did not say that.
I said, I don't understand tunnels.
You don't understand tunnels.
What don't you understand about tunnels?
That's exactly what you do in a tunnel.
Whoa.
What?
Damn, Mark.
What's going on?
I'm so warm up.
Listen, that joke is not on the Netflix special, okay?
I just want to let everybody understand in a tunnel.
All right, whatever.
Understand.
All right, fuck all that.
Understand.
Nobody stands in tunnels, Mark.
You ride your car sitting down.
You're standing in a tunnel.
I should have stuttered and thought about that one a little bit.
Oh, over your heads, dog.
Come on.
Just like a tunnel.
Whoa, shit.
I missed that one too.
Okay.
I just don't understand.
Well, Doug explained it to me earlier.
Doug is so funny.
Nobody's worse at names than Taylor.
What's his name?
Netflix.
Dove.
Netflix.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Oh, okay.
His name's Doug now, bro.
Okay, but go on.
I was thinking you don't look like a Doug.
Okay.
I don't understand.
I don't understand.
What was that?
That's what we all think that say it.
You kind of give me.
Abraham.
No.
What's that comedian?
And I think he's Arabic, though.
And I don't know what that.
He had a movie, but Hannah Gatsby or something.
I don't know, but you give me some type of.
You know what you look like?
Kind of, you kind of look like Neve, but like.
Neve Shoulder.
Oh, Nev.
Nev.
Another version.
I see it.
Okay.
Go back to tunnels.
Okay.
So.
She mispronounced Nev's name also.
Yeah.
Come on, Taylor.
Because it's Niamh.
Taylor.
If you don't start talking to me about fucking tunnels, goddamn.
All right.
I don't understand how they're built.
It doesn't make any sense to me because when I go into a tunnel.
Yeah.
You're talking about tunnels that are underwater, Cret.
Yeah.
That's the issue.
What other tunnels are there?
From a mountain.
Yeah.
Like, you never watch that.
No, I never, I mean, I haven't done that.
The Roadrunner and the Wily Coyote and shit.
Oh, yeah.
But I'm not talking about it.
You know, someone did that in real life and they got arrested.
This happened recently.
Someone painted the rest of the street on this wall.
Really?
Yeah.
I think cars were hitting you.
Yo, how stupid do you feel?
How fucking idiotic do you feel when you're driving your car and go straight into a fucking wall, dude?
Especially if it's your city.
And you're like, oh, I never knew Third Street kept going.
Oh, we got a tunnel in this building, bro.
That's great that this building's got a tunnel in it.
Where was the site?
Look it up.
Someone painted on the wall to go.
It's hilarious.
All right, so go on.
I just don't understand how they're built because when I go into a tunnel and I like the Holland Tunnel, I go out.
Where's the water at?
But I think, Taylor, and I could be wrong about this.
You guys correct me if I'm wrong.
There's two ways that it could go down.
One way is they actually go underneath the water.
That's it.
And they go underneath the bedrock.
Right.
Yeah.
I understand that.
Yeah.
And then, yeah, that is how they do it.
So they'll go deep, deep, deep, deep underneath where the water is, and they're just chilling right there.
So there's no water they have to deal with.
I think that is the most important thing.
I didn't know, to be honest with you.
So I'm glad you asked.
I didn't either.
I was like, yo, you mad.
You know how I learned this shit?
Exactly.
Oceans.
What's money?
It was one of the oceans movies where they have to take a drill because they're drilling in Las Vegas.
I believe it was Oceania.
So we hit the bottom of the ocean.
No, the oceans movies are a series of movies.
And you're not doing it in the ocean because you can't make a tunnel in the ocean.
Isn't it the ocean?
That's...
Wait, hold on, hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait, before anything.
Hold on, Tell us things we're going to dig to China, bro.
China connects Beijing to Newark.
Why are you taking a plane to China when you could just take a tunnel?
Real talk.
Come on.
Nah, there's fire.
Okay, well, they didn't finish telling me about oceans and science or whatever.
No, no.
Oceans 11, oceans 12, and oceans 13.
You got a lot of degrees.
No, I know that.
What are you talking about?
Now I'm mad confused.
What are you talking about?
Oceanologist, bro.
He took 12 years of oceans.
I did.
I know you lost.
Mad confused me.
I know.
I know.
It's okay.
Thank you for making me more confused.
That didn't answer the question.
I just answered everything.
You're like, how the fuck you build it?
You go underneath the water to where it's landing.
Above the fire, though.
You got to be very careful.
Nah, but you just made me feel bad good because I really thought at any time a crack could happen and just water start going in when I was driving.
And I stopped.
Didn't that happen one of the movies?
Daylight.
It happened in the movie Daylight.
Wait, should that show?
I think on the Midtown channel.
It can't.
I'm about to say it can.
Because it can.
I saw there was when it was like, um, it was a couple weeks ago.
Okay, here's something for you.
Here's something for you.
I got something better for you, Taylor.
How do you make a bridge?
Yo, I've got to go.
So, well, how do you make a bridge?
So I had a discussion.
I had a discussion with my co-worker, right?
Yeah.
And he kind of made me think about it a little bit more because he was like, if there's sand underneath the water, when the bridge sinks, because like, how are they keeping it?
If that bridge sink, how do you even put the blocks there and put the cement there?
Like, how do you get it?
Scuba diving.
Actually, not wrong.
Just make the bridge on land.
Okay.
Strong ass helicopter.
Pull that shit up.
Drop it down.
Well, that's why.
That's why I have suspension bridges.
There you go.
That it doesn't touch those mountains.
I'm not believing that either.
It's suspended, bro.
That's what's in the name.
Damn.
What's up?
What's up?
What's up with all these puns, Mark?
What's going on?
He's shooting.
He got some deep threes and then he got some breaks.
It's been three weeks.
You know what I mean?
Nah, bro.
Nah, you guys are my audience, bro.
There's people at home right now listening, loving that one.
Loving it.
I didn't even know he was joking.
I don't know what he was talking about right now.
I can't find the joke.
Go on.
What?
Is there anything else you want to know about the world?
Let me explain to you.
I have a lot of questions about the world.
Go, go, go.
We're going to give you a little bit of a bunch of aliens.
You might really be an alien, bro.
Go.
Okay.
So, like, why are they calling it?
Well, it's more of the English language.
Yeah.
No, I don't want to talk about it.
Just say it.
Come on.
I just learned about tunnels.
So thank you for asking that question.
That's true.
I didn't know either.
Yeah, let's go.
Okay.
Why do they call it?
Why do they call a building a building if it's already done building?
Shouldn't we call it a built?
That's a great.
That's a fact, y'all.
That's a fact.
Taylor Rossi is a genius.
Taylor Rossi.
Why did they change the building?
You're built.
Yo.
That's facts, though, Taylor.
But when I ask other people that, they're like, because that's stupid.
I'm like, you're only thinking that because we call it a building already.
The first building was actually made by a person whose last name is Building.
The term is building.
It's after his last name.
And then the verb was created afterward.
Really?
No, I just made that up.
She was so inspired over.
Mark, come in with your fun joke.
Go, go, go.
She already said it.
She already said the fun joke.
And you guys loved it.
Come on, understand.
I don't understand it.
Like a total.
Come on.
Dang it.
All right, go.
You're smart.
It's kind of fire, bro.
You really might be an alien.
That is what an alien was saying.
Why do you call it that building?
It has been built.
Come on, come on.
This is great.
Go.
Get it.
What the fuck?
What else you want to know about Earth, Taylor?
No, no, come on.
Go.
Pressure.
Okay.
Why do we call it.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Why do we call it a driveway?
Right?
Wait, no, no, no.
That wasn't it.
It was like.
Don't we call it a parkway?
Scratch that.
You drive on a parkway.
You drive on a parkway.
So don't you call it a driveway?
It's on a driveway.
Yeah, why is it?
Why is that?
Because the guy that invented driveways last night.
Shut up.
Yeah.
I had a really another question, but I can't remember it.
I was just thinking about it before.
That was great.
Well, we gave it the two minutes we said.
And I think it's two minutes with Taylor.
Two minutes with Taylor.
Taylor tweeted.
I like that.
Two minutes with Taylor.
So you come up with your questions.
Any question about the world that you're curious about, and we're going to give you those answers.
But I do like that.
Building and built was good.
The next one, Driveway Parkway.
Certain stuff doesn't make sense to me, though.
English language.
Yeah, I hear you, dude.
I hear you, dude.
Totally, dude.
All right, what else we got?
What else we got?
Cook.
All right, sports shit was popping.
Yo, it's mad sports shit.
Kyrie's still being annoying.
Yeah, I'm.
That motherfucker's annoying, bro.
You think Kevin Durant's over it yet?
No, but do you know what the context of the quote was?
So LeBron was like, This hurt me that Kyrie said this on a podcast with Kevin Durant.
Kyrie said, Normally, I feel like I'm the best person to take the last shot at the end of the game because I'm essentially because I'm the best shot maker.
This is the first time I've looked at it like he can do every shot I can do and he can make it look easier about Kevin Durant.
Which I don't think is crazy.
And LeBron was like, I'm so hurt by that.
I always try to build up Kyrie, blah, blah, blah.
LeBron was kind of a hoe about it.
I feel like that's a good thing.
Hold on, LeBron was mad that he's going to get mentioned.
That's kind of Pippeno Pippen right there.
LeBron was mad that he's like, nothing's going wrong right now, bro.
Do you think it's because Larsa Pippen has been sucking them all off?
Do you think that's the reason?
Super spreader?
Yo, she is a super spreader, bro.
That girl is 46.
She legs.
Bro, she's out here getting dank.
Wait, hold on.
LeBron was mad that he wasn't mentioned in Kyrie's.
LeBron was mad that he wasn't mentioned.
No, LeBron was mad that I apologize to everybody listening right now.
LeBron is mad because Kyrie said in an interview a while ago that now, for the first time in his career, he finally has someone who he feels as confident as himself taking the last shot.
LeBron was like, yo, fam, we're on the same team.
Like, I didn't know that you didn't think I could hit shots.
LeBron is so pussy.
Yo, talk that shit, Taylor.
I've been told you that, though.
I just feel like I like LeBron outside of the court.
I don't like him on like basketball.
LeBron Clutch Performance Debate00:02:52
He's sensitive about basketball, but like when it comes to real life stuff, you like where he steps up.
Yeah.
Why do you think?
Why do I think that?
Yeah.
Because I've seen him play and he's pussy.
Like, he tries to.
I don't like it.
He cries about everything.
He cries about a lot of his calls.
Yes.
He plays like a soccer player.
What does that mean?
That is an insult.
International appeal.
International appeal.
Same thing.
No, but for real.
Yeah, he kind of a whiny dude.
Yeah, is that?
Y'all just noticing that?
Yeah.
Yo, but I'm not saying that.
I don't like whining, bro.
Yeah.
I think it's a whining thing.
I don't like fucking whining, dude.
Go out there, get your shit done.
Simple as that.
I mean, that's LeBron.
If you've been the best since you were 18, everything goes your way.
I mean, maybe not his whole life, but professionally, successfully, your whole life.
You just kind of expect things to kind of go your way.
But he's also had...
He's all sorry.
He's also a little passive aggressive.
He's just like, that's his way.
It's savvy, media-wise, to be like, oh, I was so generous to Kyrie.
I told him you'll be MVP, blah, blah, blah.
He's a talented kid.
The kid, the kid, the kid.
But it's mad passive aggressive.
It's strategic, but that seems to be how he operates.
And I get how great he is, but that is annoying.
Yeah.
Yeah, but if you're Kyrie, you just got to take that shit.
Like, you are the kid.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, you are.
This is LeBron James.
This is the greatest player of his generation.
And y'all are hooping together and he fucks with you, but you're not LeBron.
Well, no.
In that case, though, I'm like, yo, I'm trying to compliment my teammate.
I'm not trying to dog you out.
You are better.
He never says I was the best player.
He said I could hit the last shot.
We all kind of agree with that, I think.
Yo, low-key, maybe this is, maybe this is Kyrie just trying to get a statement.
It's not the wrong thing, but maybe this is Kyrie trying to gas KD.
That's what I thought it was.
And trying to let KD know, hey, I'm going to be the number two here.
Don't get it twisted.
I know what you do.
That's what I thought it was.
He said, we're going to be one together.
Because he didn't say someone could make it better than me.
He's like, he can make it and make it look easier.
We're still going to make it.
Yeah.
Fair enough.
But when it was Kyrie and LeBron, though, who was taking the last shot?
Kyrie hit the last shot.
I mean, there was still 58 seconds left or whatever.
So it wasn't like two seconds left.
So LeBron has been mad clutch towards the end of his career.
In the beginning, but he has been unreal clutch like so many people.
Absolutely.
He's not clutch.
I just think Tyree is good in those moments.
He's like.
Yeah, if you got one person you want to take the shot, Kyrie has an infinite amount of moves.
LeBron's got bully ball and he's got that step to the side three.
So that's his way.
Yeah, it's not that crazy.
People just need shit to talk about, so they talk about it.
And LeBron did too.
And what bothered me is he was like, when I read the trans script of his comments, like you went through the whole comments and still thought it was an insult?
He said, like, I took it in context.
So that makes it even seem more like, oh, he's not just taking a sound bite.
He's upset with the full context.
Kyrie Last Shot Context00:05:09
Interesting.
I think LeBron just wants to be put with the greats like Kobe and Mike.
He is.
Yeah, but he's a different.
He's not Kobe and Mike, though.
Different genes.
But you could compare Kobe to Mike more than you could compare LeBron to.
I think LeBron is a better player than Kobe, but Kobe's more Jordan-like.
What?
Yeah, it's not that crazy.
You don't need to react like that.
No, I do.
I do.
How dare you?
This is such a strong reaction.
Yeah, you did react, but you grew up next to each other.
Even if I didn't know, even though I didn't, I wouldn't think that.
Even if I didn't, I would not think that.
I don't think black people aren't rich or bad.
You are so rich, bro.
I hate it.
This girl don't even know what a tunnel is, bro.
That's how you get it.
You don't even live near a tunnel.
You're like, what would I do in that tunnel?
I only fly via private jet.
My chauffeur takes me around.
Exactly.
The windows on the limbo are so tinted, I can't even see the road.
I can't see shit.
You are so bougie, dude.
It's unbelievable how bougie you are.
You mad bougie, too.
You are mad bougie.
You changed, bro.
You got your hands.
I missed the old Taylor.
She asked for snacks earlier.
I showed her our assortment of snacks.
Not good enough.
He did do that.
Not good enough.
Did do that.
It's unbelievable.
Remember when we had, remember when we had the other chair?
That's very funny.
Remember when we had the other chair, we had that leather chair?
Yeah.
And then she's like, I need something more plush.
Yeah.
She just said, I need something more plush.
Look at her now in the future.
A goddamn seashell.
We gave her a fucking seashell that you're saying.
We had to buy a shit.
Why are y'all making her every episode?
You're talking about us your boyfriend right now.
So the point is, Taylor, you got to stop being so bougie, yo.
This is flagrant too.
Okay?
Out here, we're chilling.
This is like blue bush.
We're just regular blue-collar Americans.
Like, you out here, bougie as fuck.
Yeah.
You got a purse hanging off your mic.
Like, all you do is shop.
Name.
Look at your fucking computer.
It's made out of snake skin.
That's crazy.
What's going on, Taylor?
You're wearing a scarf.
It's 90 fucking degrees inside.
How bougie is she?
Bad bougie.
This girl's so bougie.
Just be regular like us.
Yeah, hardworking Americans.
That's it.
Are y'all done?
No, we're not done.
And the questions she asks is crazy.
Like, why would people bail things?
Just get Mexicans a day.
Just fucking bougie.
You are so fucked up, dude.
Oh, is his name Dub?
Like, he doesn't look like a dog.
That's how I sound to you.
I sound like a white girl.
You are so bougie.
Yeah, dude.
Damn.
You are so bougie about it.
Like, it's crazy.
It's really crazy, dude.
You don't make me just come back to that.
I'm in.
I'm in Allian.
I'm in Allian.
Why do you make me sound like I'm one of the girls from Clueless?
That's what you honestly sound like that.
Yo, that's how much you think you're above us.
Oh, Stacey.
That's facts, bro.
Yo, that's facts.
I would like to, though.
See?
You flipped your hair.
And you flipped your hair, yo.
You are so bougie.
You don't even think she's a human being.
That's how much you think she's above us.
Oh, my God.
I can't possibly relate to you fucking mongrels.
Oh, my, you humans.
Yuck.
Whoa, dude.
That part might be true, actually.
I know.
I see it.
I think it.
I can't believe.
I don't even know what to say.
And I spoke with Snoop Dogg.
And that's another shit.
Oh, I smoked Super Dog.
I had the video right there.
Remember when I smoked with Snoop?
Oh, you guys didn't do that?
Oh, weird.
Oh, my God.
She was like, oh, you guys didn't hang out with Kobe when he was younger?
Yo, you didn't wait with Kobe?
I'm the one that bought his backyard hoop.
I'm the one that's in my driveway now.
You told him how to play ball.
Yo, that is crazy when you said you taught Kobe how to play ball.
Yeah, that's wild.
The age is all off.
Like, it don't even make sense.
But the fact that you even said that, and you got the mamba case for the fucking computer.
This is crazy.
Purple mamba.
That's fucking nuts.
Jeez.
Yo, Taylor.
We got to bring you back down.
We have to bring her back down to Earth.
Yeah.
I'm waiting to leave Earth, actually.
Oh, yeah.
Where you going to go?
Go back to my planet.
I'm literally trying to go back to my planet.
What is your planet?
Planet.
I can't tell you all this.
Yo, why are you acting so light-skinned?
Yo, why you acting so bougie and light-skinned, Taylor?
What's up with that?
Whoa, my planet is probably high yellow, ain't it?
Isn't it?
It's probably high yellow.
You going to Saturn?
First of all, I know.
Oh, that's because it's red nose.
Oh, Saturn because he got rings on it because you like jewelry.
Bougie ass.
Oh, there you go.
You the one that's bougie that bought your wife or your fiancé now an ice skating ring.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
You're right.
You boys bougie too.
I didn't say I wasn't bougie also.
That was good.
I'm working class bougie, though.
Oh, you're working class.
I still got a collar.
You know what I mean?
I ain't one of these misfits in a fucking t-shirt.
Reservations all over town.
Whoop Strain Analysis Promo00:03:12
Come on, bro.
We in the different restaurants.
They got clothing requirements.
I was going to say that.
My planet is under rats.
We're done with you, yo.
We had enough, dude.
Honestly, we had enough.
Time to take a stand.
We got to take a stand against you, bro.
You're acting crazy.
You are a crazy ass girl.
What did you say literally when you walked in today?
She walked in the door.
She said, yo, we could start now.
You gotta start now.
Son, literally, it was fucked up.
Akasha's still out there doing a date shit for Dunkin' Donuts, bro.
It was still working, bro.
He was bracing up all the lattes.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, him and Doug.
He's working hard.
They're working hard.
Will you make him get the Dunkin' Donuts?
We don't make him.
He goes and gets himself one.
Yeah, we send money and offers.
You say, yo, when you're clocking, just get it.
And it's Duncan Donuts, too.
Support Brown Business.
Supports Brown Business.
I do support Brown Business.
Which one?
Yeah.
Buy Brown on.
Dunkin' Donuts.
That's a good point.
All right, I'll give you that.
Yeah, it's decent.
Taylor, I swear to God, Taylor.
You are pushing every one of my last buttons.
I swear to God.
This girl is pushing my buttons.
Like a kid on an elevator.
Like a kid on an elevator.
Just pushing all of them.
That's what you do, huh?
I love doing that.
All right, guys, let's take a break real quick.
I need to tell you about Whoop.
I know I told you about it a couple weeks ago.
I had just worked out.
I was really excited to use it.
And then I got Corona that day, so things are kind of off kilter, but I'm still super excited about Whoop.
Guys, it is the fitness wearable that is all-encompassing.
It's the only one you need.
24-7 personalized insights.
It analyzes your strain throughout the day.
It analyzes your sleep throughout the day and your sleep quality.
I obviously went back and forth between really tired and sleeping a lot and really anxious and stressed out and depressed and not sleeping at all.
And Whoop, I swear to you, I checked it all the time.
It would tell me how many hours I slept and what percent of recovery I had.
If you are trying to get fit because the quarantine got you out of shape like me, well, I was always out of shape, but even more so, this is the fitness wearable for you.
Alex, you've been using Whoop for a long time.
How do you feel?
Oh, I love Whoop.
I like that it tracks my sleeping pattern.
I love that shit.
So it's like I keep track of my stuff and it's like light.
Fucking, I even shower.
Wearing it right now, right here.
I shower mine.
Yo, I've been showering mine too.
I don't take it off.
It gives you, it tells you anything you need to know.
Melatonin helps you sleep.
That's how you'll find out is through Whoop.
Guys, 24-7, five days of battery life.
This is the fitness wearable you need to use.
All you got to do is go to whoop.com.
That's W-H-O-O-P.com and enter the code flagrant at checkout.
And you will save 15%.
We always save you money at Flagrant True.
We make you happier.
We make you healthier.
That's what the fuck we do.
So go to whoop.com.
Enter the code flagrant at checkout.
Guys, it's a no-brainer.
Just get it done.
Order your whoop today.
Now let's get back to the show.
All right, what are we talking about, yo?
What's up?
What else we got?
Come on.
Did you guys see this shit?
Oh, yes.
What is this?
Can you explain this to me?
Vaccine Story Needs Spice00:08:12
Mario Lopez doing a movie.
You want to talk about someone who fucked Jake Paul up, maybe?
Mario Lopez could box his ass off.
Really?
For real?
That's how he's in such good shape.
Legit.
Now he's legit.
He got body.
He's an alien, so I believe that.
He hasn't aged.
Yeah, yo, it's crazy.
Actually, let me take that back because I don't know how tall he is.
He might be small.
He might be, you know, he might be in mid-five foot range.
5'10.
Oh, no, he's that's tough.
That's a tough matchup right there.
That's a tough matchup.
He's old, though.
He got to be in his 50s, right?
So, recipe for seduction.
Break this down.
Apparently, he is playing Colonel Sanders.
There's a trailer out.
This is a lifetime movie.
Cultural appropriation.
That's cultural appropriation.
The title of the movie is recipe for seduction.
It is cultural appropriation.
That's a good point.
Many white people we have left.
How many white people we have left to play?
I'm saying they say you're gonna be the minority soon.
They're gonna take away James Bond, they're gonna take away Superman.
I don't know, though.
They're gonna take away Colonel Sanders.
If you're a white guy today, audition for roles and your agent's like, Yo, I got you a role, you're gonna be a Colonel, Colonel Sanders.
I don't know if I would take that.
But a carnal of fried chicken, so you're kind of bridging the gap.
The racial, you know, I mean, the racial that Spanish fried chicken probably slap.
Oh, my God.
I would love to know that recipe.
It's so good.
I love Spanish chicken.
Spanish fried chicken?
Oh, yeah, that's it.
That is a recipe for seduction, low-key, dude.
Just going around cracking out.
So I just don't get why.
I don't understand the idea, even.
Why would anybody put up money for this?
I think it's a joke movie.
That's my assumption.
It's like a sharknado.
But is Lifetime clever enough for this?
I mean, if they are, it's hilarious.
So they love it saying yes.
Yes, bro.
Lifetime literally puts out the same movie over and over 10 times a year.
They understand what they're doing.
You know what I mean?
And they're like, oh, yeah, let's just throw some fucking silly shit in there and keep the money coming in.
It's the same thing as when they put those little thriller.
Blow your mind, bro.
Movie Tremors.
I seen that on a plane recently.
It's just only tunnels.
What?
It's just a whole movie of tunnels, bro.
How'd they film it?
I don't know what to say.
How'd they film it?
I don't know.
It's not only tunnels.
The fucking thing comes up out the ground.
Ain't that the one with Kevin Bacon?
Yeah, but don't they make tunnels on the train?
Yeah, they be doing underground tunneling, but you don't see them.
Well, sometimes you see them at the end.
Also, how they could get through the ground?
No, but like, I never thought about how the fuck they can get through the ground so quick.
What are you?
They scared everybody.
God damn, they were good.
Yo, they were nice, yo.
They were nice, bro.
Who?
You're talking about worms or something?
Like, what are y'all talking about?
Kind of.
Yo, Taylor had enough, huh?
She was like, I'm sick of this conversation.
She decided we're moving on.
So we got back.
Whoa, I see.
That's bougie ass.
She's so bougie, yo.
She was literally out.
She was thirsty earlier.
She just goes, water.
Yo, yo, just put her hand out.
Water.
That's fucked up.
Like, what?
I am thirsty, though.
God.
All right, let's move on.
What are we talking about?
Recipe for seduction?
Can we move on from that too?
All right, what else we got?
I think we good.
We finished.
We did an app.
Yeah.
We got the whole thing.
Oh, you see the Cardi B shit?
No, but I did see that de Blasio is going to test the vaccine.
This motherfucker.
I've never hoped that a vaccine has bad results more.
Yo.
Like, wouldn't it be great if he took that shit and just like the 5%?
Oh, my God.
Well, no, no, not that he got COVID, but like half of his body just went all rick and mortis or some shit like that.
That'd be hilarious.
Yeah.
We're rooting against the vaccine.
Also, I'm kind of tight that there's a vaccine.
Why?
Because now you're going to be able to do it.
I just got my immunity, bro.
Like, let me flex on these.
You're ignoring now with immunity.
Oh, dude.
Bro, it's a little crazy.
Oh, bro.
I have air root.
Again, people say, put a mask on and say, no.
But what?
I told the dude literally this morning.
This guy was like, when we were walking down the street, he got all exaggerated.
Me and my girl walking out, he like exaggerated, went all the way to the other side of the street as we walked over and started saying something through his little mask.
Whoa, son.
Look at you talking shit.
Guys, like, yo, chill.
Why did it even happen?
You know what's crazy, bro?
This is what's crazy about that.
The book that fell is the Social Justice Warrior Handbook.
Oh, shit.
By my girl, Lisa DeBasquelli.
That is hilarious, bro.
Because I was about to talk shit about this social justice warrior walking down the street.
That's crazy.
Now you got to change.
How did I just say that?
Would you want a single of me?
Yeah.
Because I got it.
Oh, shit.
Yo, shit ain't done.
Y'all got a ghostly hair white.
Why is this falling like that?
Now we do have ghosts in here, but we didn't think it was that big of a deal.
That's why Charlamagne always wants to fight.
Why are they just falling in my pocket?
Why are they just what I do?
Excellent.
Yo, that was a sign.
I feel like I'm in like finish telling this story, yo?
We should move on.
Let's try it on Patreon.
Try one more time.
Let me try to pay.
Let's see if we can have it.
So this guy.
Dunno.
Dun up.
Don't look so excited.
Now that the special is done, he had enough of you.
Nah, he's like, I know he's...
You're not going to be able to relax until the 18th, 17th or whatever.
Anyway, but yeah, so this guy tried to mass shame us.
And I was just like, man, I got the antibodies.
There's really no story.
I think that's what was trying to stop.
I think God was just like, there's no end to this.
So I'm going to.
He just salt made you.
A little bit of spice.
Let's put a little spice in there.
This story needs a little spice.
Point is, it's like, let's fucking go.
We should be able to do Scarlet Letter, but the good one.
Oh, the A for antibodies.
Oh, killed that.
Let's go.
That would be fire, right?
Everybody's safe around us.
There's nothing that we could do this bad.
We can't spread it.
We're fucking Gucci.
Oh, my Lord.
I love this.
Shouldn't we be able to show not only antibodies, but negative tests?
Sorry, positive tests and then 14 days removed.
And then that is how we can go anywhere?
Yeah.
That should be the way that you could travel.
Yeah.
But why isn't it?
I don't know.
I thought it worked.
I thought it'd be a negative test from recently.
I mean, I guess they could say false, negative, blah, blah, blah.
But if you had antibodies, you're good.
It also might start incentivizing people to go out and get it.
So then they could start.
It's also not an official body.
You know what I mean?
Like, there's all these different places that are testing.
To have an actual verified positive.
Yeah.
You'd have, I don't know how you wouldn't organize that.
Man, those day tests ain't shit.
Y'all are really comfortable.
Like, I'm very...
We know there's ghosts in here, Taylor.
It's fine.
We except that they don't normally get in our way.
It's fine.
Yeah, just talk to them.
You just fuck with the lights, but that was a new one.
Yeah.
Like, you'll just find this out.
You're not afraid of aliens, but you're afraid of.
Why do you think Charlamagne walks straight from this room to the studio B?
Doesn't go in here.
Yeah.
Because we don't record in here.
Listen, Common Logic would think that.
Yeah.
That's why we recorded Charlamagne's like, I'm not doing it in here.
This is flagrant now.
Yep.
What you know about it?
I actually believe that.
Guys, I'm going to stop this podcast before we run out of steam.
Okay.
Stop it 10 minutes ago.
Yep.
If you're listening now, it's too late.
You're going too far.
Asshole Army, we love y'all.
We appreciate y'all, man.
I'm sorry, asshole army.
Nah, don't be apologetic, man.
We're good. Everything's good.
It happened for a reason.
Blow this shit up, man.
Blow this fucking shit up.
Let's go out there.
Let's make some waves.
Go add it to the watch list.
Spread the word.
December 17th.
Make sure y'all kill this shit.
Also, we'll see you Friday on Patreon.
We are back.
Patrons, thank you so much for fucking with us, man.
It's crazy to see how many of y'all were reaching out.
It was just being like, yo, just get healthy when you're ready.
Yeah, that was great.
We come back.
We mean that.
That means a lot to us, man.
Thank you so much.
So we'll see you on Patreon.
You know, we do another episode every single week on patreon.com slash flagrant2.
It's only the biggest comedy Patreon in the world.
No big deal.
And you can see us over there.
But again, Netflix, December 17th, spread the word.
Thank you so much.
It's great to be back.
Great to talk to y'all.
Well, technically, we're not talking to you, but you know what I mean.
And it's great to be back in here with you guys, man.
And once again, thank you to everybody who helped out in the special, worked on the special.